the-hot-zone

[the-hot-zone]

the worst part is, yes i still climb. in fact i recently started getting into ascending. and yes i still miss upper limits and jetru. but you could not pay me any amount to venture into the docs i wrote during 2020.

ppl need to stop liking old embarrassing posts. i scrumpt a little just now at the jetru rock climbing au appearing in my notifs

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ppl need to stop liking old embarrassing posts. i scrumpt a little just now at the jetru rock climbing au appearing in my notifs

[the-hot-zone]

being an older sibling is like. you've never known a life without me. mom yelled at me and it taught her she never wanted to yell at you. I painted my room purple and grey and then you did too. we live in the same house but I haven't spoken to you in months. I don't know your favorite color. I saw it was going to rain so I picked you up from school on my way home so your books wouldn't get wet. i was so worried when you woke up sick when you were three. you don't remember being sick. mom and dad made their worst mistakes with me and I'm glad they didn't make them with you. I'm doing everything for the first time so you won't be in the dark. I don't know any of your friend's names anymore. I used to know them all. if something happens to mom and dad you won't have to worry because everything will fall to me. you don't like to be home alone but even if you don't see me just knowing I'm there makes you feel better. at least that's what mom told me. you still give me jars to open for you because you can't quite get them. I only see you during dinner. i'd never even think about missing one of your concerts. I stand at the counter when I eat and now you do, too. when offered a selection of books you picked the same one I did when i was your age. I'm terrified you compare yourself to me. I love you. I don't know if you like me. I want you to. mom says dinner's ready

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swap the fancy up

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doc there is a fucking hole where something was

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thanos 💀??

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they should invent a writing session that doesn't feel like pulling out your own teeth

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abnormal about characters who choose kindness in cruel circumstances because their existence underscores the concept of choice. kindness as not a state of being but as a state of action; through doing so, a state of resistance. one of the most vivid characterizations of despite it all.

i miss ali from squid game

[the-hot-zone]

when i put together a recommended list of anything (but especially books and poetry), it takes me days if not over a week or so because i am so meticulous abt the person i am recommending stuff to AND the books/poetry themselves. i consider often my favorites from years ago in addition to recent reads. it's like a sacred quest to me

[the-hot-zone]

my mom bought me 4 pounds of pork loin. as a treat. "the wok" by kenji lópez-alt is already scared of me but prepared to be more scared (chungking pork & moo shu pork teehee). also reading "xi'an's famous foods" and i will absolutely be making the hot and sour soup with pork loin. peace and love . on planet eart. both excellent cookbooks by the way, though "the wok" is by far one of my favs

i also just realized i don’t talk a lot abt my home chef adventures here. this must change. i am actually secretly dying to talk about spices and recipes and history and cookware and meal planning and cookbooks all of the time. like a crocodile beneath the surface of the water basically.

[the-hot-zone]

i miss ali from squid game

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“Sometimes you get so close to someone you end up on the other side of them.”

— Richard Siken, Editors Page: The Long and the Short of It

[the-hot-zone]

not doomed by the narrative but saved by the narrative. yeah i know you'd rather die than keep suffering but the story doesn't actually care what you want. you have to keep going, even when it hurts. even being erased from existence won't stop you from being salvaged from the wreckage of un-being. get up. keep pushing. keep bleeding. keep living.

[the-hot-zone]

sometimes your favorite fanfic isn't a fanfic at all but the insane DM's between you and your equally freaky mutual

[the-hot-zone]

more on writing muslim characters from a hijabi muslim girl

- hijabis get really excited over pretty scarves - they also like to collect pins and brooches - we get asked a lot of questions and it can be annoying or it can be amusing, just depends on our mood and personality and how the question is phrased - common questions include: - “not even water?” (referring to fasting) - hijabis hear a lot of “do you sleep in that?” (we don’t) and “where is your hair?” (in a bun or a braid, usually) - “is it mooze-slim or mozzlem?” (the answer is neither, it’s muslim, with a soft s and accent on the first syllable) - “ee-slam or iz-lamb?” (it’s iss-laam, accent on the first syllable) - “hee-job?” (heh-jahb, accent on the second syllable)

- “kor-an?” (no. quran. say it like koor-annn, accent on the second syllable) - people tend to mess up our names really badly and you just get a sigh and a resigned nod or an awkward smile, maybe a nickname instead - long hair is easy to hide, short hair is harder to wrap up - hijab isn’t just covering hair, it’s also showing as little skin as possible with the exception of face, hands, and feet, and not wearing tight/sheer clothing - that applies to men too, people just don’t like to mention it ( i wonder why) - henna/mehendi isn’t just for special occasions, you’ll see people wearing it for fun - henna/mehendi isn’t just for muslims, either, it’s not a religious thing - henna/mehendi is not just for women, men also wear it, especially on their weddings - there are big mehendi parties in the couple of nights before eid where people (usually just women and kids) gather and do each other’s mehendi, usually just hands and feet - five daily prayers - most muslim kids can stutter through a couple verses of quran in the original arabic text by the age of seven or eight, it does not matter where they live or where they’re from or what language they speak natively - muslim families tend to have multiple copies of the quran - there are no “versions” of the quran, there has only ever been one. all muslims follow the exact same book - muslims have no concept of taking God’s name in vain, we call on God at every little inconvenience - don’t use islamic phrases if you don’t know what they mean or how to use them. we use them often, inside and outside of religious settings. in islam, it is encouraged to mention God often and we say these things very casually, but we take them very seriously - Allahu Akbar means “God is Greatest” (often said when something shocks or surprises us, or if we’re scared or daunted, or when something amazing happens, whether it be good or bad; it’s like saying “oh my god”) - Subhan Allah means “Glory be to God” (i say subhan Allah at the sky, at babies, at trees, whatever strikes me as pleasant, especially if it’s in nature) - Bismillah means “in the name of God” and it’s just something you say before you start something like eating or doing your homework - In Shaa Allah means “if God wills” (example: you’ll be famous, in shaa Allah) (it’s a reminder that the future is in God’s hands, so be humble and be hopeful)

- Astaghfirullah means “i seek forgiveness from Allah” and it’s like “god forgive me” - Alhamdulillah means “all thanks and praise belong to God” and it’s just a little bit more serious than saying “thank god” (example: i passed my exams, alhamdulillah; i made it home okay, alhamdulillah) - when i say we use them casually, i really mean it - teacher forgot to assign homework? Alhamdulillah - our version of “amen” is “ameen” - muslims greet each other with “assalamu alaikum” which just means “peace be on you” and it’s like saying hi - the proper response is “walaikum assalam” which means “and on you be peace” and it’s like saying “you too”

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the relationship between laiqa and isko can very much be summed up as intricate rituals. if this book was ever published their "relationship" (they likely do not get together romantically) would have unforeseen levels of discourse

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jasper's story makes me insane bc imagine betraying/killing/driving away everyone else in your life including the person you did it all for, and being left with only your enemies surrounding you. and even when you begin to view them as allies, you will never be held any closer than arm's length away from them due to your past actions. his story makes me want to bite people augh. the isolation of making yourself into a savior