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[thatxship]

just finished reading Only the Brave by Solmussa and i feel like i should be entitled to some kind of compensation to help me pay for therapy

[thatxship]

my absolute favourite thing about violent fics is the long list of warnings at the beginning of the chapters (murder, torture, blood, injuries etc) and it'll be this like 15 thing long list and the author will just go

i think thats it?? not too many this time :)

as if its not the most horrific collection of words I've ever seen on one page in my entire lifetime

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draco: *turning around in a chair* do you want to tell me where you’ve been?

harry: uh, i was with...hermione!

hermione, turning around in her chair: think again

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Draco: whoever ate the last pie come forward and i’ll forgive you

Harry:

Hermione:

Ron:

Draco: smart. you know i would never forgive you

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Voldemort: do you wanna DIE??!?!

Harry: well, yes

Voldemort:

Voldemort: shit

Voldemort: do you wanna talk about it?

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harry: *cuts a finger with paper*

draco, under his breath: hasn’t he fucking suffered enough already

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harry: yes, my friends know that i’m homosexual

draco: oh...well, you wanna fuck?

harry: no. never. not in a million years.

harry[turns to hermione]: i wanna fuck him

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Harry: nice one, Malfoy! High five!

Draco: *gives him a high five*

Draco: *intertwines fingers*

Harry: wha-

Draco: I’m in love with you

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Draco: it’s been an hard year so far

Harry: draco it’s the fifth of january

Draco: yeah, your point?

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Draco: be careful, it’s hot!

Harry: what? what is hot?

Draco: me. I am hot.

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Draco and Harry: *staring into each other’s eyes*

Ron: *opens a soda can*

Harry: we’re having a moment here

Ron: and I’m having a soda

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Draco, at Harry’s funeral: can I have a moment alone with him?

Everyone: yeah sure

Draco, leaning over Harry’s coffin: ok listen I know you’re not dead

Harry, opening his eyes: yeah no shit

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Draco: *flirts with Harry*

Harry: *flirts back*

Draco: I was not expecting this outcome. What the FUCK do i do NOW??

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Draco: *sees Ron and Hermione kissing*

Draco: that seems a bit too heterosexual for my tastes

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Harry: are you high?

Draco:

Draco: ...highly in love with you

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Ginny: do you ever feel like we’re not alone even if there isn’t anybody else around?

Harry, looking suspiciously at a closet: not really, why?

Draco, inside the closet: *sweating nervously*

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Hermione: can we play “I spy”, Ron?

Ron: yeah sure

Draco and Harry: *arguing in front of them*

Hermione: well, I spy with my little eyes, something that starts with “s”

Ron:

Ron: it’s “sexual tension”, isn’t it?