thatincorrectquotegeneratorguy

[thatincorrectquotegeneratorguy]

Person A: I think we can be evil. As a treat.

Person B: We?

Person A: We. :)

[thatincorrectquotegeneratorguy]

Person A: Fine! I admit it. I still can’t swim! I never took those lessons at the community pool.

Person B: Person A…You promised!

Person A: You wanted to put me in the beginners’ class with the little kids! I can’t be swimming around with a bunch of five-year-olds! They can be so cruel when they sense weakness…

Person C: That’s why, on the first day, you have to beat up the biggest one in the yard.

Person B: …Person C, that’s prison.

Person C: Only if you let it be.

[thatincorrectquotegeneratorguy]

Person A: Live, laugh, love!

Person B: Die, cry, hate.

[thatincorrectquotegeneratorguy]

Person A: Bitch.

Person B: Blocked.

Person A: Wait unblock me I need to tell you something.

Person B: Unblocked.

Person A: Bitch.

[thatincorrectquotegeneratorguy]

Person A: Do you have ANY idea what’s going on outside?!

Person B: Judging by your outrage, I’d guess someone’s having fun?

[thatincorrectquotegeneratorguy]

Person A: Why are you looking at me through a fork?

Person B: I'm pretending you're in jail.

Person A: Why?

Person B: It's spiritually healing.

[thatincorrectquotegeneratorguy]

Person A: You know, Pinocchio could tell us so much about the universe! He could randomly claim stuff like “The Big Bang happened” and his nose would confirm or deny our theory.

Person B: Pinocchio’s not omniscient, you dumb fuck! His nose only grows when he’s intentionally being dishonest!

Person C: Things are heating up in the Pinocchio fandom…

[thatincorrectquotegeneratorguy]

Person A: Screw you!

Person B: I'll have to check with my significant other, but I'll get back to you.

[thatincorrectquotegeneratorguy]

Hey, I know a lot of queer people follow me, especially young trans people, and I just wanted to say that I know everything is scary right now, and it's probably going to be scary for a while longer, but it's not the end.

I've seen a few posts floating around saying that you need to survive to outlive Trump or to spite the people that put him in office, and if that's what keeps you going, then hold onto that. Spite is as good a reason to live as any, and god knows we've got every reason to be spiteful right now.

But if that's not enough, if you can't hold on to spite, then I need you to stay alive for hope, and love, and community, and the future. I need you to stay alive because you deserve to live, and to get top surgery, and to start HRT, and to love openly. You deserve to have dinner with people you care about, and to wear something that makes you happy, and to build a life that you want to live, even if you have to do it brick by painstaking brick.

You deserve all of that, and so do your friends, and so does your family, and so does every other queer and otherwise marginalized person that he's going to go after, but we can only get there if we're alive to do it. So you need to survive. You need to check on your friends. You need to find the communities around you, and, if there isn't one, then you need to look harder because I promise you community is never as far as you think.

It's going to be hard. It's going to be miserable, and terrifying, and enraging, but you need to do it. If not for yourself, then for the people around you who need it just as much as, if not more than, you do.

Remember, there are millions of queer people out there who love you. I know because I'm one of them, so, when I say this, I need you to understand that I mean it.

Stay safe, stay together, and stay alive.

[thatincorrectquotegeneratorguy]

Hey y'all, if you're capable of voting in the U.S. election, then here's your reminder to vote!

[thatincorrectquotegeneratorguy]

Hey y'all, while you're booping today, remember to click for Palestine ^^

[thatincorrectquotegeneratorguy]

The demon Person A summoned, standing amidst the destroyed kitchen: How? How were you able to summon me?!

Person A, flipping through a cookbook as fast as they can: I don’t know!! You were supposed to be chicken soup!

[thatincorrectquotegeneratorguy]

Person A: Urrrgh…I’ve never felt so sick in my entire life…

Person B: Ouch. Shit sucks, man.

Person A: I feel like I’m dying…Whyyyy…

Person B, under their breath: Because I want to go back to some peace and quiet in this house.

Person A: …DID YOU FUCKING POISON ME-

[thatincorrectquotegeneratorguy]

Person 1: Why be bored when you can be taped to a ceiling?

[thatincorrectquotegeneratorguy]

Person A, panicking: What are we gonna do?!

Person B: Blame you?

[thatincorrectquotegeneratorguy]

Person A: I’ll speak French between your legs~ 

Person B: HOTTEST THING I HAVE EVER BEEN TOLD- 

Person C *containing their laughter*: I can just imagine someone saying ‘bonjour’ to a penis- 

Person D: BONJOUR MADEMOISELLE VAGINA, HON HON TITTY CROISSANT! 

Person E: Titty croissant!? 

Person F: None of you should ever be having sex-

[thatincorrectquotegeneratorguy]

Person A, getting dressed for a formal event: Hey, do you think I can hang myself with this tie?

Person B: Oh-ho-ho, no! You are NOT getting out of this the easy way!