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Thinking about Buddie and relationship misunderstanding and I am envisioning one of the talking to someone out of their loop about the goings on in the life (I think Buck more likely to overshare with someone outside their circle but Eddie could be funnier).

And that outsider is nodding along and summarising it back like 'so, Eddie had an emotional affair with a woman who looked like his late wife and Buck caught on when she unwittingly showed up at your shared workplace and Eddie broke if off with her and swore it was just emotional not physical but with the family strain you ended up going on an indefinite break and during that time Buck hooked up with his own ex seeking reminders of his own desirability and doesn't understand why Eddie cares so much because it was just physical not emotional. And now you're trying to restore your relationship but struggling with everything that has happened and that two affairs don't make a right and your differing perceptions of the signficance of emotional vs physical infidelity, did I understand that right?

Cue Buck/Eddie sitting there like, well, no, but also yes

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3.16 / 4.05

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EVAN BUCKLEY — 6.12 “Recovery”

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BUCK AND EDDIE - SEASON 2 EPISODE 3

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What really annoys me about it is nobody talked to buck either. Nobody asked him what it was like losing his "dad", having to watch him die and there was nothing he could do. He tried to be there for everyone and they avoided him or talked behind his back. He went to a priest even though he isn't religious, that's how lonely he was because his "family" distanced themselves. So while eddie talked to hen instead of buck, he expected buck to talk to him? It was all so weirdly written. If we were supposed to believe buck was selfish in his grief, why did they show the opposite. This way, eddie just looked like an ass and it didn't even lead to anything in the end, just buck being made a joke again. Chim ordered everyone to stay but for what. So strange.

Yes! I don't have the post to hand but I said something at the time about how Eddie's "Nobody is able to talk to you" remark to Buck lands oddly when we haven't seen anybody but Maddie even try. It created a bizarre vibe where I honestly couldn't tell if we were supposed to take it as Eddie telling the audience how Buck had been acting during the timeskip or if we were supposed to see the contrast between Eddie's version of events and what is shown on screen and conclude Eddie's grief is making his perception unreliable. Between that and the abruptness of the 'Buck is quitting, no he's not' and Eddie 180-ing on El Paso bc Chimney snatches his phone, I do wonder a lot if there were drafted scenes which were left out of the final cut that would have made things smoother.

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I'm sympathetic to the ways grief makes people messy and nobody was unforgivable in 8x17 but when it comes down to it after over a month of seeing various analyses that have altered my perspective on some elements my unchanging stance is that if Eddie wanted to talk about hearing the news of Bobby's death then it was on Eddie to start that conversation, because Eddie usually shuts down or tries to evade when asked about difficult emotional topics, so how was Buck supposed to guess that this time Eddie would want to talk rather than reacting negatively to being pushed?

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Eddie's selective memories vs the full picture

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Play the Apollo Justice trilogy and I wonder how much happier certain characters would be if Fullbright and Ema swapped jobs

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rewatching 7x05 and i just. when buck comes out and eddie says "this doesn't change anything between us," it's so clear from buck's face that his feelings are a mixture of weirdhurtconfusion and not the relief he should be feeling about finally coming out to his best friend. but ultimately it reinforces what he's known about eddie for as long as they've known each other: eddie is straight. buck coming out doesn't change anything for eddie because eddie's sexuality won't fluctuate on the basis of buck's attraction to men. eddie's straight; buck's sexuality won't change that.

meanwhile, eddie's seeing it as, oh my best friend just came out to me and i want to show him that i love and support him unconditionally, and he's going through his own weirdhurtconfused feelings, so he says the first thing that pops into his head (which unintentionally sounds like i just want to be friends). so. now there's a distinction. eddie isn't buck's best friend; he's buck's straight best friend. and it's not like he particularly cares about being assigned that unspoken label, but also, it's literally not even unspoken. both eddie and buck make a concerted effort to call eddie straight the entirety of s8, which isn't something they cared to do before buck came out.

so eddie's perspective isn't i'm straight as much as it is i have to be straight, because buck isn't, and he knows what it's like to love a man, so he knows the difference, and he isn't different with me. what i'm feeling for buck has to be normal, because buck is with another man. if it wasn't normal, he would be with me.

and so it's a cycle. to buck, eddie's straight, so there's no reason to be in love with him. but to eddie, buck isn't in love with him, so there's no reason for him not to be straight.

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crucially also while i do think it's pretty likely for eddie to interpret any noticeable distance buck might put between them as a passive aggressive punishment aimed at him, i don't think that's at all how buck would mean it. from buck's perspective, it's been made excruciatingly clear that he's really weird and clingy about his straight best friend, enough that other people notice and remark on it, and then for the KO hit, eddie flat-out tells him that he can't talk to him about important shit because (of course!) he thinks buck will be clingy and weird and insert himself where he doesn't belong and is not wanted.

so like. even if he doesn't admit he's in love with eddie, clearly something has to change. he needs to back off. be normal.

and eddie hates it.

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just rambling a little but sometimes I'll see ideas that characters who did something or said something or reacted less than ideally in a situation that was overwhelming them, that there should be some sort of vengeance or punishment meted out by their loved ones. and I'll wonder - does that match the core of the show we're watching? is this show saying that you're condemned to punishment for everything that isn't balanced? or does it say that love is grace and you can find it in your loved ones when you reach out to them, but also that you can find it in yourself? it's a relief to see support and understanding despite passing storms. cheers to the ones who bloom in the bitter snow.

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thinking about buddie post-getting together and they’re playing a game or something, and Eddie like, teams up with someone else at the last second or something & buck is all dramatic like “Oh! The betrayal!! 😫 And from my best friend, what is this world coming too 😖 I simply CANT go on 😣” & Eddie is smiley and fond and rolling his eyes at Buck’s antics and bumps his shoulder like “you’re so dramatic shut up. Also we’re not best friends” (bc they’re boyfriends or fiancées or husbands or whatever atp)

And then Buck is weirdly quiet for the rest of night for some reason that Eddie can’t figure out, but his internal monologue is like, “what do you mean we’re not best friend? Of course we’re best friends, what, just bc we’re also in love, that means he has to replace me as a friend?? That rule sucks! Who even came up with that? That’s stupid, I can be multiple things & whoever said that you can only mean one thing to a person is also stupid. If I’m not his best friend, then who is? Who else is going to do all the things I did as a friend? I don’t see anybody ELSE lining up to patch up his walls or listen to him talk about sports or whatever, that’s MY job, I’M his best friend 😠.” idk they eventually talk about it & Buck is all huffy like “you can’t have 2 best friends & just bc I’m also your boyfriend/fiancee/husband now doesn’t mean I can’t be your best friend so tell whatever tramp you have on the side that they can go home now. Trying to break up a home, some people have NO shame 😤.”

& Eddie is standing there staring like, you’re an absolute fucking freak I love you SO MUCH and yes you’re right we’re still best friends now come here bestie. & it’s wonderful and fun and great bc they’re best friends in love and both of this things are very important to their relationship 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

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that's me in the corner

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im all in on eddie being the one to have to make an explicit and direct choice when it comes to buck. mostly because i do genuinely think buck done it already??? even if he’s been in denial he has been more direct about their “thing”

during the pre-move fight in the truck buck pretty much says “this is going to be awful for me so why are you acting so casual”. he’s asking for reassurance that this isn’t easy for eddie. and eddie does say “it’s not nothing” which we all know translates to “of course it’s not easy and it’s killing me that i can’t change it”.

BUT what’s important here is this is the first time buck’s not satisfied with the vague eddie-speak answer. he’s frustrated and because of the maddie kidnapping it gets dropped and lost in the shuffle of the move. it’s a pivotal moment where buck starts pushing back and i think it continues again with the kitchen fight. he’s taking a stand which means there’s really no going back now.

i see season 9 going the “i can’t do this anymore because it’s too painful so i’m going to distance myself” route. and i’m so ready for eddie to have to be direct because buck won’t! there isn’t any way for him to vague max his way out of this anymore

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i know we make fun of buck for having zero friends outside the 118 (and even then its only 4 people from his shift and their respective partners/family) but eddies worse. eddie spent months in el paso and didnt even attempt to form a single relationship at all despite assuming his move was permanent. because he had buck. every minute not driving or hanging out with son was spent talking to buck. making friends never even crossed his mind.

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buddie + text messages (7/?)