textsiwishicouldsendyou

[textsiwishicouldsendyou]

– K

[textsiwishicouldsendyou]

You are fine without me. You're not thinking about me. I bet you don't even remember that the date us coming up..

[textsiwishicouldsendyou]

We were so happy. I wish I never went back. I've tainted my brain thinking everything was perfect knowing damn well it wouldn't work. I have an amazing man right next to me, that I love, but you're on my mind. And I know you're seeing someone so why am I so plagued by memories

[textsiwishicouldsendyou]

I've been posting to you on the unsent project because it's that time of year again

[textsiwishicouldsendyou]

Why can't I stop thinking about you

[textsiwishicouldsendyou]

I've got this pit in my stomach like I'm going to ruin everything

[textsiwishicouldsendyou]

No going forward. No going back. We can't fix what's broken and it's so hard to move on from how it felt before it was.

[textsiwishicouldsendyou]

I'm so mad that you're not as nervous about this as I am. I could be pregnant. I could have a humor tumor. Or mass. It could be cancerous or require surgery. And you're just like "eh probably just fat now that you don't run around at work"

[textsiwishicouldsendyou]

The viper strikes again

[textsiwishicouldsendyou]

I feel like I've gone from abused to abuser.

[textsiwishicouldsendyou]

Are you only showing concern because if I disappear now, your access to pussy ends?

Don't you realize she's right there.

How do you not see her begging for another chance with you.. she wants you. She needs you. You're across the hall..

[textsiwishicouldsendyou]

I can't even explain myself because it's so stupid and they're going to think I'm paranoid and dumb and tell me im wrong and that's just going to make it worse...

[textsiwishicouldsendyou]

They're probably both making fun of me.

They probably think this is so funny.

I didn't realize I was the barrier between them that needs to be removed for them to be what they both so obviously and desperately need.

If I asked when the decision was made to move.. i guarantee it lines up with me.

She's running away and begging him to chase her. And he has no idea he wants to chase her. Until she's gone. Then he will. And I will be a memory..

[textsiwishicouldsendyou]

Why does it feel like the cat thing was a lie. Why did that make me so uncomfortable...

[textsiwishicouldsendyou]

Why did you have to keep forcing it. I never say yes. Why today. Why did it need to be hard today. When everything is different.

[textsiwishicouldsendyou]

What if they're lying about all of it. So my guard goes down and whatever they're planning works.

[textsiwishicouldsendyou]

You react so properly. Idk why I want it to be different. Idk why I want you to send me 100 messages and call me and beg me to not go anywhere and tell me how desperately you love me.

That's toxic of me.. I shouldn't be like this..

You're safer if I let you go