tell-him-a-story

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The sound my stupid cat makes when I move him from his favourite spot (on top of my jackets)

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boys complimenting me:

me: :// 

my teacher leaving an ‘excellent work!!!’ on my essay: 

me, holding a wall for support: bro i’m just…..bro i’m just really teary i’m ghjdgfsdhjfjsdhf i’m hgjggjkhfkdjgj wow thank you idk what to say….bro idk why i’m fjhdsfkjdfg crying right now 

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It’s been 1 year…

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You did well Jonghyun🌹

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“Starter house”?????? We’re supposed to have more than one house???????

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I like how dolphins breach with such vivacity

whales breach with grace

sharks breach with power

…then manta rays be like

“there goes Billy fulfilling his dreams”

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It’s sad that toxic game culture is so prevalent cuz like. As someone who has ended up in random matches with kids before, I can attest to how fucking easy it is to reverse and un-teach shitty attitudes in kids.

Example: I downloaded Friday the 13th because it’s free on psn. I dunno how to play, so I just enter quick play and I’m matched with 3-4 kids on mic. Immediately on mic they’re shitty and disparaging to each other. They laugh at each others deaths, they actively work against team mates and self sabotage, they call each other “fags”, etc. From the sounds of the voices they cannot be older than 13-14.

I put on my mic and just decide I ain’t havin it. I am nice. I thank them for barricading doors or leaving me items. When they break free from Jason’s grasp I say “good job!” or I try to help them. One kid survived for most of the match by himself. When he dies, I tell him he did a fantastic job.

The mood shift is practically INSTANT. These kids almost immediately stop being dick heads. They start encouraging each other and being kind. After the match all of them try to friend request me. Which should tell you a couple of things:

A) kids want to be kind, and they want to have a nice time playing games. But encounters with adults like me or so rare that they’ve trained themselves to instantly put on a toxic, shitty, defensive veneer when encountering any new person online. It’s literally just THAT EASY to not groom a horrible gaming community, it’s just that NO ONE does it.

B) the speed of which they all tried to friend me was cute, but paints for me such a sad picture? Like these kids are SO desperate to find people to play with who aren’t crappy jerks. They played with me for 10 minutes TOPS and all instantly tried to reach out to me.

tl;dr: The kids are alright. Adults are shit heads.

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So today this kid yelled Nani the fuck?!? in the middle of a test and I felt compelled to share this to the world.

teachers, share the weird crap your kids have done!

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My fucking roomba woke me up at 5 am to tell me she’s stuck near a cliff.

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changes font to 12 times new roman

double spaces

indent first line

well i think that deserves a two hour break

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Me: *shows basic human decency to cashier

Cashier: ??!?! Thank you! You’re the nicest person ever!

Me: are you ok

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straight men trying to make Serious war dramas and accidentally making incredibly tender homoerotic cinema is the funniest thing

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