#zone is everything to meeeee

[othercrossee]

This is how diamollo looks at zone

[ironmanstan]

.

[persephoneflouwers]

Hello, it’s happy Angie writing.

Feet hurting, throat aching, heart full Angie writing. I’ll be short, I promise.

Listen, there’s something special about Louis’ shows usually, but the Festival feels different. It’s chill energy and sparkling excitement.

Comfort zone and peaceful space.

There’s just this thing about the Away From Home Festival, you feel it since you buy the tickets! It’s the pounding in your chest because you want to be there so much and soooon. And when the day comes, you’ll be there, sunscreen, water and rainbow flag squeezing all the feelings in your pockets. You know you’re going to have the most fun you have ever had.

Maybe it was me, but find me another place when you have a spritz on an hammock in the middle of a show with live bands? It went straight into my heart.

And Louis, oh Louis. Louis. Louis.

The 28 minutes countdown got me on the floor. I was like “he’ll be on stage at 22.14, because the countdown started at 21.46” and when he actually came on stage at 22.14 I lost my voice screaming lmao

I have comments, opinions and questions about literally anything. I will always have with him, but it’s all forgiven tonight.

I’ll forgive it for the way he put WAOYF right after Saturday, during which I cried because you know me… I’m so weak for that song!

I’ll forgive it for the way paradise entered the FITF bingo card.

I’ll forgive it for how fucking hard WDBHG slaps.

I’ll forgive it for the mosh pits during OOMS.

I’ll forgive it for how magical Silver Tongues is as a closure, as predicted (by meeeee when the album was out)

I loved everything. Every second. Every person new or old I met. Every singe grain of sand inside my shoes and every little star of glitter on my clothes.

It was the happiest I’ve ever been.

It was the safest I’ve ever been.

Trust me, this won’t be the last <3

[precious-little-scoundrel]

I…I have headcanons about their sexy times but they’re very disjointed and I shan’t sully this nice aka by going full x rated.

GIVE THEM TO MEEEEE

Ok, filth and philosophy below. 18+ as always on here folks

Well, in short. I feel like Benny Demarco is a savorer of flesh, as was mentioned before, ha. If some sorts of odd things might make yall wanna mock him, may I point to the door right now because Benny’s tastes are essential for making Lu comfortable in her skin again, and nobody said it was gonna be straight vanilla. She could get that in college so. Hold your piece or bail out now.

And please add your own thoughts guys, I wanna hear them. I don’t care how graphic, lol.

This man would find an elbow joint erotic if attached to the girl he loves. And weirdly, he can make her think of it that way too. Savoring. Literally doesn’t need her to take her clothes off to make her feel ravished in the best way. Kissing? He’s great at kissing, Lu loves the way he kisses her initially with only one hand gently anchored to her cheek and the other resting respectfully on the seat back.

His lips and tongue and gentle hums are everything to her and make her quake. His scent too, familiar but exciting. Just like him.

He don’t need his hands to make her drown in his kisses. But once he does use his hands?! Who needs penises? No really, Lu has to call Ida to ask if it’s possible to cum from someone kissing you and rubbing your biceps.

Ida isn’t sure but she knows a woman can come from a man licking her shoulder blades, don’t mind Rosie and his obsession with Ida’s sinewy back, it’s incurable

But it’s not just someone, it’s Benny. Only Benny can make Lu do that, but it certainly spices up earlier dating times when the girl feels so utterly romanced while not out of her comfort zone. Benny is a giver, gets high off giving to her and the realization that she trusts him with her literal healing in this way sometimes short circuits his masculine brain until he’s on cloud nine from that alone. It makes him feel like such a man, not at all the nightmare riddled shell of himself he sometimes thinks he is.

After awhile they do make it into each other’s underwear. As I’ve said before, I don’t think Talullah waits until marriage to do that. She needs to know before, the planned and restrictive schedule of a wedding night would throw her for a tailspin. Whatever her own convictions on the matter, Ida agrees and supports her in this, often kicking herself for not being braver with her own wants in the early days of her marriage to Robert.

Lastly, another note. Benny loves eating out, loves it. But he’s also the absolute king of rubbing his tip through her petals until she’s an absolute gushing wreck. And something about watching his olive hand with its jangling Catholic charmed bracelet round his beautiful wrist holding onto his cock with a firm grip and sliding it throughly the obscenely loud proof of her pleasure sends Lu into a lust filled haze of contended safety she never thought was possible in real life.

[hushroomloser]

Chris Evans short story part 2

Pairing: ReaderxChrisEvans 

Request: Meeeee 

Prompt: “I’m sorry I thought you were somebody else”

Warning(s): I’m a first-time writer

Word count: 927 words

A/N: Hey online strangers, I wrote the first part a while back and have the rest of the story in my drive but have never posted it. This story I wrote way back in 2019 :'(. I will be posting at random times if you stay and read it thank you so much. Enjoy xoxox

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

As the night slowly passed, she managed to watch her documentary, do her night routine and go to bed without bursting in awkwardness every 2 seconds. The morning quickly came. 

Blues and pinks filled the sky. The birds sang their routine melody and her alarm screeched its routine demise. She groaned and groaned.  Dragging herself into the bathroom to fix the mess that nights do to her. She managed to get out of the house and head to the hospital on time. Greeting her colleagues, she headed straight to her desk. 

She spent most of the day thinking, not about her research but about those eyes. Those blue eyes. She never thought she ever saw eyes as blue as his. As beautiful as his. As blue as the sky on a midday summer's afternoon. As blue as the sea. As, as … as blue as. She stopped. Trying to figure out what else to compare his eyes. She couldn’t find anything bluer. 

She was surprised at her sudden distraction. Especially a distraction like this. “Earth to you. This is the control center, do you copy?” the beautiful brunette teased. “How long are you going to stare at your dark screen for, huh.” Questioning her best friend. “I was thinking about the dose measurement I needed for later and I couldn’t figure it out.” She lied, finally opening her computer. “ Yeaaah right. Now, are you really going to tell me what was so important,” she glanced at her watch. “That you zoned out for 2 hours while smiling like a schoolgirl.” As much as she hated talking to others about how she felt or what she thought, she connected to her friend. She understood her in ways she wished she could understand herself.

“I wasn’t thinking about anything in particular,'' she paused while typing her password praying her friend would leave it. But knowing her, she would want something a bit more detailed. “It really is nothing, you know, hmm you know I think that they are filming something in the city.” Glancing at her with curiosity, Lizzy thought that you weren't the one to keep up with celebrities and such. Continuing with her mumbling, “So yesterday I was out with Zeus and we went to this coffee shop”, she stopped, looked at Lizzy and continued. “Someone mistook me for someone else and that's it.” she finished.

She looked at her friend, her friend looked back at her. She signed, took a long breath and quickly blurted, “Okay don’t freak out, he was really pretty and I think it was Chris Evans.” 

There was a pause, though not one of those awkward cricket-chirping pauses. No. It was worse. She prepared herself for what was to come. Closing her eyes and covering her ears. Her friend let out what could only be described as a knife being pierced into your ears. What a scream that was. It was such a piercing that the medical staff came running to the Nuclear medicine department. “Is everything all right?”, the concerned nurse on the left of the door asked. Lizzy sat down. After letting out such a powerful scream she had used up all her energy for the day. Chris fudging Evans. She was a BIG fan of his and even made you go see his depute broadway show. Which took a lot of convincing and a lot of chocolate. Quickly dismissing them and apologizing for disturbing everyone. 

After she regained her sanity, she rambled on and on about how this is such a Hallmark movie move. And on and on about how they would make beautiful babies together. She rambled and fangirled and everything you could think of until lunch came. 

 Sitting at their usual table at the cafeteria, Lizzy sat there daydreaming while her loving fiancée, yes fiancée, Oliver was laughing at the whole situation. He had heard that someone earlier given half of the hospital a scare for their lives. He loved Lizzy even with her borderline obsession with this man. He wasn’t jealous, he knew at the end of the day she was his. 

....

“And cut, that’s a wrap for today thank you all for the hard work.”

Thanking the crew after what seemed like an eternity of shooting the same scenes over and over again. Chris walked back to his trailer to quickly undress from his ‘work’ clothes and into his everyday attire. Jeans and a plaid shirt. Simplicity, he thought. After such a day, he couldn’t wait to get home to Dodger and snuggle up with him. 

The man walked through the parking lot trying to figure out where he parked his car earlier this morning.

Arriving at his temporary home, he greeted his dog and quickly hopped in the shower. He got out and made himself a quick dinner. He sat at his kitchen table going over his lines. His thoughts slowly wandered off. He wasn’t feeling himself these days. And he wondered why, though deep down he knew why. He thought about her, he missed her. He would never admit it but he wanted her back. She broke his heart so many times but he loved her so, he truly thought she was the one. That he was done chasing after girls that weren’t worth it. But I guess somehow everyone found a way to hurt him. They say the devil is always on time, and they were right. Just like magic, she was calling him. His phone was ringing and the person on the other line was her. Her. The one, he thought. 

~

Hope you enjoyed this chapter, I should probably name each part right?

Anyways, I am on a roll so I will post the third part now.

Thank you for reading this far xoxox

[brainrotfm]

Idk ur time zone but I’m sure it’s the 22nd by now so HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY DEAREST ROTTY!!!!!!!!!!! I HOPE YOU HAVE THE MOST AMAZING DAY AND EVERYONE MAKES YOU FEEL SO SPECIAL AND U GET EVERYTHING YOUVE EVER WANTED BECAUSE YOU DESERVE IT MWAH MWAH!!!!!!!!! 💖💖💖💖💖✨✨✨✨✨✨

STOP THESE IMAGES IM SOBBING SGATAKDKDKA

MELKY THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THINKING OF MEEEEE SHAFAJSKXLCGAGA ILYSM THIS MADE ME SMILE LIKE A GOON 💕💖💗💞💖💘💝💘💓💖💗💞💗💓💗

[hak]

OKAYYY. I’ve been playing final fantasy x and here are some preliminary thoughts after like a hard won 4ish hours in 🫠

It was a huge leap to start this game just because 1) I don’t play games like this period (rpg fighters) and have even less experience than any other type of game I ever played and 2) there’s truly nothing more intimidating to me than the final fantasy franchise.. like it only won out over me trying out kingdom hearts because I didn’t feel like doing the punch _ button for _ move type fighting in a game just yet lol. BUT WHATEVER! It has been my goal this year anyway to try games out of my comfort zone (80% of games out there lol) so here I am…

I think the world-building is very appealing!! look I have never in my life even tried looking up final fantasy lore or anything I think I just know Sephiroth and the big ducks maybe but regardless I loved the 5 seconds we got in Zanarkand just because a fantasy steampunk-esque world can be charming.. and exploring the 1000yrs later world and it’s differences is also very interesting. I think I spent half of my hours just talking to everybody I saw and looking at the world textures lol it’s nice and peaceful most of the time

I love the cast a lot.. playing as Tidus kind of surprised me because I think I’m not used to fully formed playable main characters like him (was thinking Link or a fire emblem protag rip) but I LOVE HIM!!!! HES SO GOOFY AND CHARMING and I am so endeared by the voiceover narration (ummm his future self??) and where the story is taking him. He and Yuna are so sweet and cute. I actually really love that not ever cutscene was there to move the plot??? Like the one first boat scene where Tidus stole some guys binoculars and was monkeying around on the ship. Or this one 🥺😭💗

SO PRECIOUS!!! It’s how I know something horrible is going to come regarding them 🧎Well for now I’m just in for the ride. The other guardians are definitely a ragtag bunch but I really appreciated how they were fleshed out in this narrative. I like the big wolf beast guy and I will tell you every time I get a chance I try to get Tidus to go talk to him and every time I get ignored 🥲 ONE DAY!!!! And I love theeee goth woman supreme Lulu even her name is so cute. Love her little doll. She saves my ass every single fight I swear. Wakka is also charming in his own way lol he reminds me of a character I just don’t know who.. he and Lulu having their josei romance drama in the backdrop of this story also gets meeeee. Like!?? Look at them wtf…

Ok ok now about the fighting itself: it’s not as bad as I thought. It’s still not something I really have come to look forward to though, and I really really despise the mechanic where you’re walking and get a randomized battle out of nowhere. The Pokémon grass effect whatever you call it…. IM SICK OF IT!!!! LET ME RUN AWAY!!! especially when I’ve had like 3 fights in a row and that stupid breaking glass effect comes and I have to fight again. Oh save me. im not built for this. HOWEVER. Besides that. It’s okay. Figuring out what moves I should be doing isn’t all that difficult even if I do kind of just guess most of the time. I’m lucky I’m using an emulator and saving as much as I can in case I need to reload during a battle. I’ll be okay lol I just want to complain sometimes just cuz. 😖

And finally…. The one thing I did not expect to encounter in this game and genuinely made me want to QUIT this game for good despite everything positive above: BLITZBALL. WHY DO YOU EXIST. WHY. I CANT STAND THIS SHIT!!!!!!!!

This funny scene made me laugh when I first saw it because I literally thought blitzball games would play out like that first cutscene in Zanarkend - AS A CUTSCENE!!! TIDUS YOULL LOSE I HAVE NO SKILL YOULL LOSE TIDUS!!!!!!!

I will admit now I didn’t know wtf I was doing on that boat and totally failed at getting the Jecht shot but how??? Was I supposed to know????? I THOUGHT IT WOULD JUST LEAD TO A FUN MINIGAME how was I to know it was life or death (in blitzball)…. I did Google whether I needed it to win and results varied. But before I get judged I spent about 40 min trying to grasp the entire blitzball tutorial and things still didn’t wrap around until I began playing and EVEN THEN I wanted to cry and rage quit. Something I have never needed to do in all my life!!!!!! Then I thought fine whatever I’ll just let the game do it’s thing and maybe try to give the ball to Tidus as much as possible if that’s my only shot and lord almighty I couldn’t even get one point in. The ai would score so much and I swear I paid attention. Imagine me mid game pausing just to google 10+ year old forum answers on whether I can just do the bare minimum and still win. I don’t even think I needed to win??? But the other team was so mean to us …. LIKE I WANTED TO WIN….. but I’m not capable of it. I knew it when I first started the tutorial too versus the real game I truly am so disinterested in this kind of minigame (the least mini of mini games I’ve ever played ever) that I don’t care. Like I’m just so so frustrated that it’s 3am im writing this post just to vent about how I want to keep playing ffx but not at the cost of this stupid side game that shouldn’t even take me more than 15 min to play!!!!!

I should’ve known from this part in the tutorial that this was bullshit fr. Look I know its not like all of the mechanics were rocket science, if I took 1 day to actually study the game I would BUT WHY WOULD I DO THAT. WHY WOULD I WASTE MY TIME AND DO THAT. I am just so put off at this point from this game simply because of blitzball. Sorry to Tidus and his quest for home and all but it will not come true because I cannot stand playing blitzball. 🤬

Where i am now: I paused at the end kinda when Wakka comes in at the end of the game. I couldn’t score a single point so it was just left at 2-0. I really don’t care anymore I will just lose the game because I’m sick of it. But damn I was really trying okay. Kinda. I hate being petty but we’ll see if I want to even pick it up as a whole game again when I wake tmrw after this experience lol

To be extremely honest I kinda began ffx as a total “wouldn’t it be funny if?” type game for me because I know what I like and dislike in games and this one bordered that for me so I was genuinely curious to see how far I’d last. But this blitzball game is so far into my dislikes that it actually bums me out because the storytelling is so in my lane. I don’t want to quit just yet but I will say now if blitzball gets any worse I’m out. That truly is my last straw lmao. Also it seems like a very long game otherwise and even that is a struggle for me to comprehend. Plus battles are even going to get worse and I can barely slide by during those… idk it is looking grim for the mariel partakes in final fantasy era 😭

[shoezuki]

between being uncomfortable with dnf jokes and finding ranboo tubbo marriage stuff off-putting I'm rly just out here zoning in on techno's smp involvement and blocking everything else out like a petulant child with their fingers in their ears

OPIGSOIGSO;IGH;SOIYG MEEEEE THTS MEEEE

fuck everything else im here for Technoblade

[miss-melon]

I Love You Too, Brat

(Hiyoko Saionji x Reader)

‼️POSSIBLE TW: Slight B*llying‼️

“Hiyoko Saionji.”

Every time you heard that name, so many complicated emotions stirred up inside of your body. Hiyoko was one of your classmates, and at first glance, you thought she was an elementary schooler who was only at your school to visit an older sibling or something, but when the days went by and she kept coming to school, you eventually put the pieces together in your brain that she was actually another high school student.

Your first interaction with Hiyoko was at lunch, you were eating one half your sandwich that you had made that morning as Hiyoko walked right up to your table took the other half right out of your lunchbox without warning and scarfed it down in less than 5 seconds.

“H-hey! That’s my food!” You scolded. “Yeah? Well I was hungry so DEAL WITH IT!!! I’m not so sure you need to be eating any extra calories either!” She snickered. “Why you- you little brat!” You were frustrated with this situation, this girl who you never talked to just walking up to you and taking your food right as you’re about to eat it, and insulting you on top of that? Who the hell does that?! You were lost in your thoughts until you heard a slam on the table, you looked across and saw Hiyoko sitting down right across from you, her eyes piercing daggers into your soul.

“W-what is it?” You asked. “What’s up with you? You always sit here alone, are you depressed?!?!” She looked at you with a curious expression, she had childhood level curiosity that’s for sure, but she was really rude too. “Depressed? I wouldn’t really sa-” You we’re about to finish your thought when you were interrupted. “Because if you are, you probably DESERVE IT!!!” Hiyoko burst out laughing, now you were angry, really fucking angry. You stood up and yelled right in her face. “YEAH?! WELL MAYBE YOU’RE SO RUDE BECAUSE YOU DON’T HAVE ANY FRIENDS!!! WHY ELSE WOULD YOU WALK AROUND THE SCHOOL BULLYING PEOPLE YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW?!” You rarely ever raised your voice, but it honestly kind of felt empowering. That is, until you looked at Hiyoko.

“W-WAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT TO MEEEEE?????!!!!!” Her loud crying filled the cafeteria and instantly you felt awful. “H-hey, I didn’t mean to make you cry, honest! I’m sorry!” You felt so guilty, but not for long. “Nah! I was just kidding! You should’ve seen your face! You were so ashamed of yourself!” Hiyoko burst out laughing. You looked at her and sighed. “You really are a brat y’know that?”

After you and Hiyoko’s exchange in the cafeteria, you thought you were done with her, until she she started sitting by you every day, she was almost like a lost puppy. You actually found it kind of adorable, of course, you would never say that to her, she would probably kill you in your sleep. Overtime, you began to notice that she wasn’t bringing any food to school, and she wasn’t buying any either, she would just take a half of your sandwich every day like it was no big deal.

You eventually started to make an extra lunch for her every day, you didn’t know why you cared so much, but you couldn’t just sit there and let her go hungry, eating nothing except half a sandwich. Your sandwich. Even though you went through all that trouble just to make her lunch, she still never acted any different towards you, she was the same little brat that she was the day before. Under normal circumstances you would be furious with someone for being so ungrateful, but it was something about her rudeness specifically that made you let it slide.

“You’ve barely touched your food today, is everything alright?” You asked with concern. “What do you care? It’s not like we’re friends or anything...” Hiyoko said looking away from you. “Well, I disagree, I think we are friends! And as friends, we can tell each other anything! It’s a sign of a healthy friendship!” You said confidently. “Just drop it okay?” You were shocked at Hiyoko’s response, normally she was loud when she spoke, and her responses almost always ended with a quick-witted insult. But this time was different, you noticed something was wrong. But you decided not to press it any further to avoid any potential conflict.

Eventually the day came to an end and you were sitting on the bench in front of the school, pretty much everyone else had already went home for the day, but you were taking in the good weather, as it was supposed to get much colder next week. You were sitting down inhaling the fresh air when all of a sudden, you saw Hiyoko sprinting down the school sidewalk. She saw you and immediately ran towards you.

“H-Hiyoko?! Are you okay?!” You asked with your voice full of concern. Hiyoko looked at you and sobbed. “I-I TRIPPED AGAIIIINNNN!!!” She was crying like a little kid. Normally this was the part where she cut the act and told you to stop being an idiot for being so concerned, but something about her crying seemed genuine. “Do you need me to take you to the nurse?” You asked. “What? And subject me to being examined by MIKAN??? I would rather DIE! You said we were friends Y/N, you should know that I HATE MIKAN!!!” At least you knew she was still being herself. You honestly felt it was kind of silly that she had been sad all day over tripping a few times, but you decided that you would help her anyway. You had a first aid kit in your backpack because you were a rather clumsy person yourself. You took out the first aid kit and began tending to Hiyoko’s “injuries”.

After you got her all cleaned up you looked down at her. “Now, what do you say to the nice person who took care of you in your time of need???” You teased. You expected her to kick you in the crotch or something, but instead, she sat down on the bench with you and put her head against your shoulder.

“Y/N...”

“Yes Hiyoko?”

“I love you.” She said that very quickly, it took her a second to realize what she just did and when it hit her, she buried her face into her tiny hands. It took you a few seconds but then it hit you. The real reason she was so upset all day. She wasn’t upset because she tripped, she just wanted more of your attention. That’s why she started sitting with you every day.

When she lifted up her face you looked down at her and saw her blushing, you wrapped your arm around her and said: “I love you too, brat.”

THE END.

_______________________________________________

I hope you guys like this one! Writing for Hiyoko was a big step outside of my comfort zone, but I really wanted to push myself with this one!

2 more stories coming tomorrow!

[kayteewritessteve]

It’s nice to be important, but it’s important to be nice.

Alright, I think it’s time that I put this out there. I wasn’t planning on having any more to do with this shit storm, but I think this needs to be voiced now, more than ever. I’d like to point out, this is my generalized views on this shit, and it is not to attack or shade anyone in this fandom. This is how I have felt on this shit for years, between two different fandoms and finally I feel like I need to put it into words. Side with me or not, this is my set views on this issue, and I will not sit here and argue or fight online with anyone over them. This is how I see it, and nothing anyone says will change this. So don’t even waste your breath.

To start off, to all my lovely readers, I just want to thank you all from the bottom of my heart. I sometimes feel like I’m in my own little bubble in this fandom. Like whenever I see other writers having issues with readers not interacting, I feel bad for them, but then I look at the comments on my fics and I can’t really relate to them on that front.

I normally steer clear of the reader feedback issues, because I genuinely feel it does not pertain to me, personally. I have so many lovely readers, who leave me lovely comments and feedback, and those few of you who do, are all I truly need to keep me happy.

But, with that said, I also am someone who sees both sides of the coin. I’m someone who cherishes the readers who just like and reblog, cherishes the ones who just like and comment, and cherish every other interaction in between.

I will never personally demand comments from you all, I will never say ‘fuck your social anxieties, you will comment or else!’ Because how does that help? I deal with social anxiety myself, I know how crippling it can be. I have been that person reading other peoples fics silently and in the background. I have had moments where I’m afraid to even like a fic, because then I feel like I must reblog or I’ll be labelled a shit person. I have been there, so many damn times.

I may not appear as someone with social anxieties at first, but they are there, hiding under the overly bubbly personality I also have. I turn the volume up on my friendly side for this blog, just to hide the true anxious person that I am.

So I get it. God do I get it.

Tumblr is scary, it can be overwhelming, and loud, and nerve-wracking. And when issues like this happen, it can be an even scarier place. And I think demanding feedback, and getting super angry about this all, is not helping matters. It’s scaring more people away.

I think us as writers, need to remember that we may not feel intimidating, we may just completely forget that to others, we are bigger blogs, we are the people they look up to, the people they want to be like. And I’m not saying this as an ego trip, I look up to other bigger blogs myself. I idolize some bigger blogs and hope I can even be blessed enough to get halfway to where they are, some day. But the point I’m trying to make here, is that sometimes we forget that someone else may be nervous to reach out, to comment, to interact with us, because they themselves feel like a small blog. Like a nuisance, like they are annoying us, like we will think they are weird. And I only use those exact words, because I have had my readers reach out and tell me that’s how they normally feel in interactions with other writers. How those writers have made them feel.

So I think we need to all (writers included) be a little nicer to each other. Yelling, bitching, chastising heavily, will not fix these issues, it will probably make them worse. If I’m being honest.

And us as writers need to give back just a little more to our readers—I know, I know! Some of y’all are about to go in on me, saying how dare I say we give MORE back after all our hours of writing. But, hear me out first.

When I first started this blog, barely anyone commented on my fics. So what did I do? I started commenting and thanking the people who just reblogged. As people started to comment a little more, I made sure to leave just as in-depth replies as they did, when people started reblogging essay’s on my fics, I replied in kind. I laugh, I cry, and I stomp with my readers. I don’t just write, post it then walk away and expect everyone to sing my praises. I don’t ever demand feedback or love.

I take the few lovely people who give me that feedback and love, and I return it once again. And you know what? Because I do, I have so many lovely readers returning, to give me feedback once again! I have people reaching out to thank me for actually replying to them, I have people stepping out of their comfort zones to read AU’s they never liked before, solely because I wrote them.

And shit. That’s the highest of damn praises, man. Like I can never thank the few of you who love my stories so much. I can never thank the few of you who have been with me from the start, I can never thank those of you who stumbled upon me recently and never wanted to leave again. You all, every single one of you, are the reason I still write today. You are the reason I’m still here.

But I have BUILT these relationships. I have nurtured them, and helped them grow. I have taken the time to really see my readers, to appreciate them. To give back exactly what I get. And yes, it’s time consuming, and yes, sometimes it takes me a few days to finally reply to them, but the point is, I find the time to reply.

I can’t tell you how many times I have seen someone leave such a lovely long winded reblog comment on a fic, and they literally get ���thanks for reading!’ in reply. Like. Damn. That hurts meeeee, and I wasn’t even the commenter. But I think I can only feel that hurt, because I have been the reader that pours my soul into my comment, and then doesn’t even get a thank you. Not even a reply at all. And that shit sucks, and it can really deter me from ever commenting like that on that persons fics again. Like why waste the time, if they aren’t even reading your comment? And yeah, maybe they are, and in this case, even just a ‘thanks’ would be better than nothing. But most of the time, a thanks doesn’t even come.

Now look, I get that we all have lives, I get that we all have things that are more important to take up our time. Trust me, I do. But I think you can’t really sit here and complain about a lack of reader interaction, when you yourself aren’t doing everything you can to encourage them to interact. To show them that they can reach out and comment, and you will love them for it. They will be your hero for it.

I think if you just come in here, thinking you’re above everyone else, and demanding praise for this, you are going to be in for a rude awakening when you don’t get what you think you are owed. What you believe you deserve, solely because you write.

I personally believe that my job is not finished just because I posted my fic. I personally believe my job is never finished on a story, so long as people are commenting and reblogging. I give them a story to read, they give me love and feedback, and then I give them that in return as my thank you for reading. And ya know what? It’s worked out well for me. I’m happy with all of my readers, I cherish them, and I feel blessed for every single one of them.

This is a hobby for me, it’s not a job, I love interacting with my readers. And I think when this hobby starts to feel like work, and I don’t want to interact anymore, then I will walk away. If I ever stop getting the joy out of it, then I’ll stop. Simple as that, and you know why? Because I was the one who decided to share my writing with others. I am the one who built a following around them. I am the one who choose to put myself in this place. So how the hell am I supposed to sit here and demand people to praise me, when I was the one who took the necessary steps to put myself in this exact spot. I was the one who opened my stories up for people to actually read.

So yeah, maybe I don’t see it the same way the rest of you do. Maybe I’m naive, or silly, or ignorant, but this is how I see it. And I’m sorry if you don’t, I’m sorry if you feel you deserve a certain level of interaction and you just aren’t getting that. Because at the end of the day, I want everyone who writes to truly enjoy it and to get the love they deserve.

But we have to lower our standards a bit, we have to realize that we may not get exactly the praise we want, but we still get praise. And in any form, that’s such a glorious thing. When we all first started out, getting 3 comments was HUGE for us. Getting even one persons feedback was like life changing! So why is that not the case anymore? Why is that not enough now? Because we have thousands of followers now, instead of a hundred? That’s utter bullshit.

Praise is praise, take it or leave it, but don’t bash it. Don’t discredit it. And don’t act like it isn’t there. Because it is, just maybe not in the full extent you are wanting. But it’s still there.

TL:DR - please be nicer to people, and understand not all of us are extroverts. Some of us suffer from social anxieties, and that needs to be realized and remembered. Show love. Spread love. Stop bashing each other and just write because YOU want to, and not because you want all the damn praise.

[lordseochangbin]

Heart Stop: Hoodie Season (2)

A/N: Yooo the feedback from Chapter One made me so happy thank you guys for reading <3

Word Count: 2.3k of pure fluff with Bang Chan

Chan was met with a smack in the head as he watched you walk down the hall. “Bro! What the heck was that?” Jisung asked.

Chan stuttered with his words but Jisung and Minho found his actions to be pure comedy. “‘Cause I’m a nice guy, my ass” Minho mocked.

Turning around in a hurry, Chan placed his hands on Jisung’s shoulders. “Do you know that girl’s name?”

»»————-　♡　————-««

That was probably the first time you had ever been so close to a cute boy without fainting. Even when you met Seungmin, Jeongin, or Hyunjin your heart felt like you were about to explode. But for the most popular senior at your school? Not even a beat. 

You were even preparing for the repercussions, but nothing out of the ordinary happened. 

“And then he just suddenly bumped into me! What a jerk, right?!” You exclaimed, taking a handful of chips from Hyunjin’s lunch and chomping it down. 

“Jeez chill Y/N, take your time when you eat” Hyunjin responded, staring off at the track field in front of him. 

You wave your hand in front of his face to get his attention before your lips could form a pout, “Bang Chan, the ‘hottest guy at our school’ bumps into me and you don’t even care? What if I become his girlfriend, huh? A-and I ditch you for him? Then what, huh?” 

When you saw Hyunjin’s eyes widen you knew you had gotten his attention. It was unnecessary but you loved seeing his reaction anytime he got angry or jealous- it was priceless. This time however, he looked like neither of them. He looked shocked almost, as if..

“You think I’m hot?” 

Dropping the chips in your hand, you turn around to see Bang Chan behind you and choke on your spit. 

“Uhh, ummm” Standing up, you look at Hyunjin for help and when he doesn’t budge you immediately respond “I mean that’s what everyone says”

That’s what everyone says? You don’t even know what you’re saying at this point. 

“Right..” Chan says in a voice close to a whisper. You can hear the disappointment in his voice and in fact, you were disappointed too. Rather than focusing on the situation you just put yourself in, you found yourself focused on the number of breaths you were taking. Completely zoned out, unaware yet aware. Full of speech yet speechless. You looked for a reason and asked yourself how many breaths you were taking- just like your cardiologist suggested and found an answer.

An almost break-taking answer, none. 

“Dude, just ask her out stop being such a pussy,” Jisung said, pointing at you. “She’s right there”

The boy’s weight shifted on his feet, as if he was getting smaller and smaller and his swim bag dropped to the floor. He felt it the second he walked towards you. His chest rose and fell unsteadily and at this point he couldn’t keep track.

“Y-Y/N..” He stutters, his hand itching the crook of his neck as his bottom lip trembles. 

Minho rolled his eyes, “Oh great, we came all the way here and he’s stuttering” he mumbled before being elbowed in the stomach by Jisung. 

“Huh?” You responded, Hyunjin quickly got on his feet to back you up. 

“She doesn’t need a date” 

Jisung chuckled as he pulled Hyunjin aside, “Look Chan is stuttering. And with his cocky ass, that’s a first '' Jisung grabs Hyunjin’s shirt to drag him away and finds himself at loss before Minho could carry him over his shoulder. 

“Let’s go, little guy” Minho says and Hyunjin looks back at you. “SAVE ME Y/N SAVE MEEEEE” 

You simply laughed at the sight. Drama llama. 

The whole scene took your mind off of the nervous boy in front of you. Shoulders hunched and out of breath, he took his hand out as if to ask ‘Can you hold it?’ 

“Chan, if you want to go on a date-”

“Yes!” He panted out before shaking his head in disappointment and whispering, “Please”

He covered his eyes as if he didn’t want to see you, his heartbeat slowly recovering as he finally got to courage to ask “Will you go out on a date with me?” 

“Do you even know who you’re talking to?” You asked, your hands flattening on top of his to remove them from his face. 

“Eeek!” He shrieked, making an attempt to cover his face again before you could stop him. 

“Are you okay?!” You asked in concern, letting go of your grasp on him

“Will you go on a date with me?” He asked quickly. You could feel his heartbeat pace faster and faster through his chest. The heaves of breaths pass his lips to hit yours and you find yourself in the unknown on how to respond.

“Yes?” 

“Great” He responded with a smile, pointing a finger at you before dashing off. 

“Chan!! Chan!!!” 

You crouch down to pick up the large swim bag. “You forgot your stuff”

»»————-　♡　————-««

A couple days later, you find yourself applying your sister’s makeup as you get ready for your date with Chan. Sure, you’re nervous. You’re about to go out with the hottest Senior at your school and you can’t help but to wonder if he’ll be as cocky as the guy that you heard about all the time. 

“Oh, Bang Chan he’s a player”

“He’s a total flirt”

“Have you seen his abs? He’s totally working out for the girls”

Does he work out for the girls? Is he just a player? You couldn’t help but to ask yourself if you were being played. 

When the front door bell rang you had no time to come to an answer. “Coming!” You said, doing some finishing touches and running to the door. 

You took a deep breath. It’s just a first date right? But it was not only you and Chan’s first date, it was your first date. It was like a new entry in social life.

Opening the door was like a brand new face of light. Despite it being the afternoon, Chan smiled brighter than the sun. A hand met the door rail and he leaned in closer to you. “Ready?” he asked.

“Yeah! Let me just grab my bag.”

When you two got into the car, he opened the door for you and you smiled at him as if to say ‘Thank you’

“Where are we going?” You ask excitingly as he drives off. 

Taking your hand in his, he winks at you after saying “You’ll see”

»»————-　♡　————-««

“No way,” Chan said, crossing his arms as he stared at the large amusement ride in front of you. 

“Oh come on!! It’s just a ride” You said, nudging your shoulder on his side. You have never been to a carnival ride before. Typically you’d go with your family and you’d beg to go on the rides but they would never let you because of your health.

But what did you think of that? Bullshit. Finally you’re with a guy who is completely unaware about you, someone who treats you like a normal person without overdoing it. 

“Channie~” You smirked, standing tall in front of him as you pointed at the ride. “Don’t be a baby, just go on the ride” 

Chan’s eyes narrowed down on you as he took your hand, legs practically stomping on the ground as he walked to the line. “I am not a baby!” He pouted. 

That was before the constant screaming and grabbing of your jacket. Chan didn’t let go of you the entire ride. With every dip and turn he’d throw his entire weight on you causing you to get stuck in the corner of the seat. “Chan, get off me!” You exclaimed as he clinged onto you. 

“No.. no Y/N I think I’m seriously gonna- AHHHH” He exclaimed as the roller coaster went down its biggest dip. 

Once the ride was finished Chan got off from his seat, dusting his knees. “Hey, we should go on that again”

You could only laugh at his response, “We should, it seemed like you really enjoyed it” you replied sarcastically.

And at that point it came to some awkward silence, where you didn’t know what to say and neither did he. Words weren’t necessary at this point because when Chan took your hand in his again you were left breathless. “Let’s get something to eat,” He said before taking you to the food court. 

There you two debated over hot dogs or burgers. The two of you basically robbed the food stand as you ordered everything on the menu and settled down at one of the tables.

“C-chan you have a little something” You said, gesturing at the bit of ketchup from his hotdog that smeared his bottom lip. 

“Oh do I?” His australian accent peaked as he made multiple tries to get the sauce off but failed. 

“Here, let me get it” You said, leaning across the table to wipe the ketchup off his lip with the napkin. 

If you got any closer, Chan swore his heart would’ve jumped out of his chest. It was already on a loop. Faster than the pace of a jump-rope, hopping and popping and “jopping”, but when you pulled back it suddenly died down. 

“Thanks” he nervously smiled before taking another bite at his snack. 

“Yeah for sure” You smiled back, looking around in awe as the sun went down and the carnival lights started to turn on. 

He couldn’t even focus on his meal. He was so in love with the view. Not the lights that were brought to life, nor the sky that turned shades of pink and purples. The girl in front of him. She was beautiful.

“Chan! Let’s go play that game!” You said, jumping out of your seat and dragging him out of the food area. 

You and another girl held your straws in your hand before you could competitively eye each other. “GO!” The lady said. 

Before you knew it you were huffing and puffing into your straw, blowing to watch your rubber ducky go down the river. Chan occasionally threw words of encouragement as you went down the game, and once you were close to the end he sang “Rubber ducky you’re the one-”

“And she wins!” The lady interrupted as your rubber ducky passed the finish line. 

“I did it!” You smiled at Chan as the lady handed you a koala plushie. Once you were off, Chan intertwined his fingers with yours before walking you to his car. 

“Did you have fun?” He asked, watching as you looked back at the Carnival lights. 

“Yes..thank you so much Chan” you replied with a giggle before he could open the door for you. 

“Good, because there’s one last place I want to take you.”

When Chan said those words, you thought he would take you to dinner- or maybe the park or the movies. Never did you expect for him to take you to your school’s swimming pool. 

“Chan, what are we doing here?” You ask as he unlocks the door to the gym. 

“I wanted to take you here. I don’t know.. I always told myself that if I took a girl out on a date I would bring her here. It’s like my second home you know?”

“Yeah, I get it” You followed him to the pool as he sat down on the edge, taking off his shoes and dipping his feet inside. Doing the same, you sat down next to him as you watched the shallow waters. 

This time around, it didn’t feel awkward. Not knowing what to say or what to do. Just having him next to you made you feel as good as you have ever felt. 

“Hey,” Chan said, watching as you stared down at the pool anxiously. 

The second you turned your head, Chan splashed water to your face- instant betrayal. 

“Hey!” You pouted with a laugh as your hand went to swap more water at him. It went on like this for a few seconds until Chan kicked so much water at you that you were practically drenched. 

“Chan, Chan stop” you pleaded, your hands flying in front of your face to avoid more water coming at you. The second he stopped, you pushed him down the pool, watching him fall into the very bottom and laughing at the dancing movements he made. 

Then it became a sudden worry. He went so deep into the water you couldn’t even spot him. “Chan?? Chan..CHAN!” You yelped as he pulled you down into the water with him.

Your head didn’t touch the water but you were screaming for help- hands flying everywhere and legs kicking with no use. Your hands grabbed at Chan’s shoulders as he giggled at your response before you could scream “I DON’T KNOW HOW TO SWIM!!” 

“YOU DON’T?!!” Chan exclaimed before he could get a grasp on your waist, holding you tight against his chest as you buried your head into the crook of his neck. 

His arm found itself at the edge of the pool so he could float comfortably and he reassured you that you were safe. Chan had been through this before. So many skits of paying the lifeguard or kid savior, but this time it felt different. He felt excited, thrilled even to be in a pool that he had spent most of his life in. 

You on the other hand felt calm. Tranquil and peaceful in contrast to the beating heart that was banging against your chest. 

“Are you okay now?” Chan asked, his hand going to brush your wet hair away from your face. 

“Yeah, I’m perfect” You said before leaning closer to him. Feeling his plump lips part against yours, Chan pressed you closer to him and at last your lips meet. 

Perfect you said, perfect was the word to use when you were with Bang Chan. Amazing. Spectacular. Absolutely astonishing. Any other adjective that could relate to the last three. 

His heart is beating out of his chest and yours is as calm as it has ever been.

Is this what it feels like to fall in love?

[what-a-messsss]

1x10 rewatch

Ok, let’s get back to Walt Longmire: Disaster Boi of S1 and finish this season off with a...something.  Pleading look to the heavens, maybe?  

How do I keep forgetting that Lizzie is a thing, even after our decision to find her some nice Smitten Cowboy to be with?  Holy hell, but why are you still keeping your dead wife’s ashes in the kitchen?  At least you kept Lucian in your fucking truck.  In a coffee can.  What is with you and breakfast beverages??  We all know you need lots of therapy, but this seems like a kind of niche issue.

“Trust me, you don’t, uh, you don’t want that tea.”  Buddy.  

Poor Lizzie.  She really is so nice.  And he’s such a fucking disaster.  “You seem weird,” she says, in reaction to him going bug eyed from having to convince her not to drink his dead wife without her realizing that’s what he was doing.  Sweetie, you have no idea.  And she really does like him.  

This is.  So.  Gloriously awkward.  And Lizzie’s there in her bare feet.  And all we need is for Branch to show up and we’ll have a full house, and aaaaahahaha, Walt is so trying to freeze time with the power of his brain.  Staring off into the Not Here place with his mouth pressed just so...  Awwwww, suffer.

I had forgotten that Ferg was the one who actually did the body work on the Bronco!  Even did the paint work, because that old truck has never looked so good.  I know Omar loaned Walt his truck while the Bronco was “in the shop,” but I like that the writers gave Ferg the skills to do that.

“If anybody... has something they want to say, I suggest you think twice about it.”  We don’t need to say anything; we’re too busy laughing at you.

Oof, and then Lizzie hearing Martha’s voice still on the message greeting.  She’s really quite a good actress.  Lizzie isn’t a terribly subtle character generally, but she gives her these really fine microexpressions that give you occasional glimpses that there is more going on under the surface, and she’s not just an open book.  : (  Making me actually like her and feel bad, not just cringe when she comes on.  Dang iiiiiiiit.

Ok, that does NOT look like Sharpie.  I’m sorry, but that looks like a paint pen or lipstick more than it looks like a Shapie on the dead kid’s forehead.  Even if it were one of the jumbo Sharpies, they don’t write like that, they aren’t that colour on skin, and the thickness of the lines are all off.  Which is not really relevant, but it buuuuugs meeeee.  Pedantic little shit that I am.

Ope, Branch is basically past the angst about Walt not liking him and straight into just giving him nothing but attitude.  Which, while I can hardly blame anyone for giving Walt shit, does get old pretty fast.

Walt, you are So Bad at talking to people, even when it’s for the damn job!  Yeah, it’s fine to have Ferg fill Vic in, but at least acknowledge that she’s there, damn.  Honestly it would have been good for both Vic and Ferg for Walt to tell her to follow Ferg’s lead on this one.  He knows the case, the local history, the players, the situation, and probably more about archery than her, and she could stand to take the reminder that working 5 years in big city homicide still doesn’t make her the senior deputy and that she needs to be ok learning from even Ferg.  Shit, I keep finding more and more reasons to be annoyed at Walt.  Is he even really that good of a sheriff?  I’m shaking the ol’ Magic 8 Ball here, and signs point to frickin’ NO.  Ugh.

Five HUNDRED dollars says that he didn’t check with Mathias before going on the Rez for official police business again.  Jackass.

Can’t really blame Viho for being super bitter.  And Ayasha is so sweet.  This whole family dynamic is so well done.

Aw, Ferg is so excited about the gum wrapper.  “Still minty!”  How are you such a sparklebunny?  Bless.

Detective Falessssss.  His opening line is so great, but uuuuuuuhg, he’s as bad as Walt with his singlemindedness about the case.  

“Talk to Ruby.  She runs my life.”  She runs the department, bucko, and you’d be lost without her!  Lost, I say!  But you treat her like your personal social secretary, and that’s crap.

In Fales’ dubious defense, you were just super weird about that whole encounter.  

Omar!  You creepy little lecherous jackass.  Why am I still fond of you?  It’s really rather galling that I enjoy your character at all, but I doooo.  Thank gods he has the beard now; cleanshaven was just wigging me out.  “Vickie’s never shot before--”  “That is the second-to-last time you will ever call me that.”  And I chortle myself to distraction to the point that I have to rewind to catch the lines that I missed.  With her horrible plans when she gets drunk (I’m still cringing at that flashback of her with Travis) and her obvious thing for older men, I’m honestly kind of surprised she didn’t end up having a deeply regretted something with Omar at some point.  They do have good chemistry in an antagonistic way.  And he does so enjoy tugging her pigtails.  ...ew.  Why is my brain like this?  

“A little bit of practice, even a girl can make that shot.”  Aaaaaaand we’re back to kick him in the nuts.  Not that we ever really left there.  Such a butthead.

Boy oh boy, it sure is great the tone that all these shitty rich white people take saying “Indian.”

“That is what a normal person would do in your situation.”  Henryyyyyy, I love you so much.  Why can’t we spend more time with him in the early seasons?  Why are you drinking a Rainier?  Nooooo, please have better taste in beer than your boyfriend!  You have expensive tastes in bourbon, why can’t you have decent taste in beeeer?

Walt, what is the point of practicing darts when you are FIVE FEET from the board?  Seriously, you’re supposed to be like...  (a google later)  7 feet 9.25 inches away!  That’s...  That’s an oddly specific measurement.  Wtf.  No quickly apparent reason for that specific measure.  Resisting the pull of this particular rabbit hole to continue the ep.  

Aaaah, that’s right, this is still when Walt thinks that Henry may have killed the guy for him.  And BestDad Henry talked to Cady after the blow up about Branch, and he is a wonderful human being.  “It’s really none of your concern.”  Hoooooow dare you.  It is clearly a function of being bffs with that butthead that Henry just smiles (somewhat bitterly) at this instead of tripping him into the bar or shoving his head into the cigarette machine.  (Is that a cigarette machine?  Wtf is that thing with the yellow lit up portion towards the top? [14:05])  

“What a rich inner life you must lead.  From time to time, you should consider sharing some of it with the rest of us.”  The sass!  Swoon.  Henry.  Marry me.  

“I’ve got other problems.”  Buddy, you are other problems.

I wonder how many people/places Ruby just has on speed dial so that she can zoom through her list of “Where the hell is Walt now” to get in touch with him.

Aaaaand we’re back to Branch getting a bit big for his britches.  Whee.  Better fight about it like Big Boys.  Ffs.  “Go ahead.  Give me your best shot.”  ::Pat Benatar starts playing in the background::  Oh holy shit, I wish so damn much that I had any know-how about making vids.  I would be beyond amused by a spoofy hate vid of Walt and Branch being assholes to “Hit Me With Your Best Shot.”  Ooo, oo, or “Hit Me Baby One More Time!”  Aaaahahaha, these fucking losers and their fragile masculinity.  Get rekt.

Children.  Childreeeeen.  Stop it, or you can’t go to Timmy’s birthday party next week.

The irony of Vic being the one who is actually calling them on their shit and getting to do their damn jobs.  Well shit, they actually have a warrant this time.  Will wonders never cease.

Damn, Viho is smart.  Politically savy, pointing out the election coming up.  He’s got the wrong end of the stick this time, but the fact that he’s seen these angles and considered a bunch of things about the consequences already is telling about how smart he is.

Ruby is so pleased to see Henry.  She sounds tired (dealing with Walt and Branch and the sheer volume of bs that is accumulating in that office, no wonder) but still fond.  And the look she gives him.  I love her so much.  She puts up with so much.  And I love Henry continually calling Walt and the department on their shit and just being a dedicated activist for his community.

Fuck right off, Branch.  “Woah.  I know you’re Walt’s friend, Henry, but you don’t have any particular rights here.”  You are sliding into being a full on trashbag of a human being so fast, Brancheroo.  Reminding a young man of his rights and helping him avoid getting railroaded by your biased ass isn’t a bad thing, you rusty wingnut.

Ok, it might not be Glasses!Henry, but cowboy boots!Henry with the glow of righteousness upon him is also quite A Look.

Aaaaahahaha, for once Vic’s unholy yelling saves the day.  Being able to shout over a mass of raucous teens is usually reserved for teachers, camp counselors, and stage managers.  Looool and using detention as the threat.  And then jail.  Heeeh.

This is soooo weeeeeird: I’m starting to genuinely like Lizzie.  She just showed up and I remembered that it’s for dropping off that present, and then Vic is such a butt about it, and this poor lady is just trying to date a guy that she really likes and even gave him about 5 different outs that morning and he pointedly didn’t take any of them and dammit, Lizzie deserves better, too.  Fuck, Walt, you are such a disaster zone.  And Vic is a whole other disaster area that’s looking to, uhhhh, share a border.  Yike.

The present is definitely more Lizzie than it is Walt, with the wrapping and everything, but it’s still a sweet impulse.  AND THEN VIC, who told Walt how many times that he should call her?? gets all up in her business?  Poor Lizzie trying to figure out what the fuck this has to do with Vic or how it is even on the same planet as any of her business.  She does have some issues from her previous marriage, but she owns them.  And her BS meter is actually pretty finely tuned.  Sure picks up on Vic’s awkward boner for Walt in no time flat.  Not that it’s particularly well hidden, damn.

This kid is a rapist and a murderer and The Bad Guy, but at the same time, he is a high school kid, chances are he’s a minor, and Walt is talking to him alone in his office without any parent, much less a lawyer.  What the fuck.  

“Because Ayasha Roundstone told me so,” is a good line, solidly so.  And Walt’s all in The Righteous Hand of Justice mode or whatever, with the gravelly voice and standing over the kid, staring him down.  Effective.  (But where are that kid’s parents?)  Ah, that’s right, his dad is taking a shot at whatshisnoodle to make it look like he’s the killer.

Awww, Cady.  Honey, how long have you been waiting for you FailDad to show up?  Fuck.  Right.  This was how she found out that Martha was murdered.  He lies to her so much.  He manipulates her so much.  He passes all of this off on it being Martha’s wish, but he even acknowledges that Cady had a right to know and he chose not to tell her.  He denies Cady her own agency again and again.  He makes decisions for her without ever giving her a chance to choose for herself, and punishes her when she makes a choice that he doesn’t agree with.

It’s not “protecting” her from the pain.  “Protecting you from the pain,” is not a father’s job; it’s to teach their child how to manage it, help them live through it, and how to grow past it.  You’re damaging her.  Into the suuuuuuun, Walt!  Into the fucking SUN.

But fuuuuuuuuuuuck, her delivery of that same line, “Well, let me relieve you of that burden,” is sooo good.  You done fucked up, buster.  And you just keep fucking up.  I would say in new and exciting ways, but it’s generally in the SAME DAMN WAYS, dammit Walt.

This flashback is really difficult.  

They’re right about that technically being kidnapping, too.  Wyoming  § 6-2-201 specifically includes defining kidnapping as unlawfully confining another person, with the intent to “facilitate the commission of a felony; or Inflict bodily injury on or to terrorize the victim or another,” with unlawful confinement defined as “accomplished (i)  By force, threat or deception; or (ii)  Without the consent of a parent, guardian or other person responsible for the general supervision of an individual who is under the age of fourteen (14) or who is adjudicated incompetent.”  Meaning that not only could Walt charge Jake with the kidnapping of Rich, but also probably of Ayasha, since she was ruled an unreliable witness and would more than likely be legally considered a “mentally incompetent person” according to the states’ legal definitions.  

Not... that I have the Wyoming State Criminal Code downloaded on my computer.  >_> Certainly haven’t skimmed about 80% of it trying to figure out what charges would most make sense to be levied against Jacob at the end so that I don’t have to deal with him going in to a Federal prison on RICO charges.  <_<  Or what Cady probably should have been charged with after that mess with Tate and Catori.  Nnnnnnope.  Sure don’t, didn’t, haven’t. o_o

This is about the only time I can remember there being a legitimate reason for Walt not to have backup.  Since they’re off checking other locations.  Also, damn, that was some classic Old West quickdraw shit, Walt!  Noice!

“Why did you stop me?”  Because you have to testify, you little shit.  HE is not terribly bright.

Ooooooo, somehow I forgot that it was Branch who went to Jacob.  But that makes total sense; I can’t really see Jacob seeking Branch out, but once he walks himself into his office, Jacob will certainly play those new cards for all they’re worth.  Ooooooooo, and the Hotamétaneo’o headdress!  I’d forgotten about Branch seeing it, too!  Nice call back and foreshadowing to finish off S1!

“You will not find a chili cheeseburger of this caliber anywhere in Colorado.”  And now it’s 4:30 in the morning and I want a chili cheeseburger.  Thanks, babe.   Some daaaaaay, I will figure out which is my favourite Henry, but it is not this day, because godsdaaaaamn, the red checked shirt with that vessssst, is *chef kiss* a wonderful thing.   And the director knoooooows it = that pan down Henry’s back as he turns after saying, “I said nothing,” for noooo reason other than to have Henry’s ass on screen.  Seriously.  He says his line, it pans down, we get a primo shot of his jeans, and then it cuts away.  Solely a pan for Henry Butt.  Who directed this, and where do I send the fruit basket?  Dang, it was Nelson McCormick, and this was the only ep of Longmire he directed.  Huh.  In S1, there’s only one repeat director, who did eps 1, 3, and 7.  Interesting.

Focus, kid.  You are less than 3 minutes from the end and you’ve had it paused for over 5 minutes to wander around IMDb.  No wonder it takes you three flipping hours to watch one of these episodes.  What a mess, indeed.

“We all process grief in our own way.”  Buddy.  You have not processed.  You are a human <BUFFERING> screen.  You’re a walking loading symbol.  Walt, he gives you some basic vital statistics on the guy, but...  You haven’t even asked who it was.  Walt, you are so bad at this.  Fffffffff---  And there’s season 1.  lawd.

[lilac-writes]

I dont wanna be annoying so I'll pick the best ones first: 1, 4, 8, 19, 30, 37, 38 and 39 😳 I love u I'm sorry if it's too much

Ohhhh boy, here we go!

This got super long so I’m putting the answers under a read more.

1. Describe your comfort zone—a typical you-fic.

Fluffy, full of my terrible sense of humour, probably a little romantic in a sort of tender way.

4.  How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Care to share one of them?

I just had to go count them. Including my WIPs and everything in my “Ideas” folder there’s like twentyish (help meeeee). I talked a bit about my wips in a previous answer, so I’ll tell you a tiny bit about my other half-baked ideas. The other day @ayumilovesstars​ got me thinking about a fic in which Gaara tries to avoid an arranged marriage, so I’m still thinking about how I want to do that one. There are so many possibilities. 

I’ve been wanting to do a fairy land au for a while and @ghoste-catte​‘s The Stolen Child is making me really really want to write it. (If you haven’t read The Stolen Child yet, I cannot recommend it enough. It isn’t even finished yet, but it’s definitely one of my favourite fics. Ever.) So I’ve actually got two ideas for how to do that AU now. 

And I almost completely forgot about it until I just went to look through my list of ideas. Um, I’m actually kind of a dorky cyclist. I mean, I’ve got the super light carbon fibre bike, the lycra outfit, the whole thing. And I kind of want to do a GaaLee Tour de France AU. I know that’s ridiculous and I’m not sure anyone would read it, but I couldn’t help myself (it’s the spandex, it just makes sense.)

8.  Share a snippet from one of your favorite dialogue scenes you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

Oh damn, my writing is kind of dialogue heavy. So I’m going with the first one to come to mind, which is this bit from The Question on His Lips:

"How do you say that so casually?" Gaara asked quietly.

"Say what?"

"That you're in. . .you know," Gaara turned his face away as though suddenly very interested in something on the other side of the street. "That you're in love with me."

Lee stopped walking and tugged on Gaara's hand until they stood facing each other. Gaara stared blankly at the pattern on Lee's scarf.

"Because it is the truth of how I feel," Lee explained. Gaara looked down at his shoes and chewed his lip.

"Gaara," Lee gently tilted Gaara's chin up to look him in the eye. "You do not need to be worried. I know it is still difficult for you." His eyes flickered to the mark on Gaara's forehead.

Gaara frowned. "What if it never stops being difficult?"

"Then, that is okay."

Gaara grabbed him by the collar of his shirt. "I need you to understand," he said urgently. "I feel the same way you do, it's just hard for me to say it."

"I know that," Lee soothed him.

"But if I don't say it enough, will you always know? Or will you start to doubt. . ?"

"Gaara, as long as I am the person you choose to stay up with you at night, the one you trust to have your back on a dangerous mission, the first person you run to when you need help, I will always know," Lee whispered, stroking the soft skin beneath Gaara’s jaw with his thumb. He laughed suddenly, "Here you are, walking around a foreign ninja village with just that tiny gourd and no armour, and you think I could doubt that you are in love with me?"

I still like this one a lot, just because I love fics which touch on the difference between how Gaara and Lee feel and communicate their emotions. Lee wears his heart on his sleeve and is open about how he feels. Gaara seems to have a complex relationship with his own emotions and is much more reserved about expressing them. He has an especially difficult time with love. So I enjoy them both making an effort to understand that about each other and reassure each other that they Get It. I don’t know, that’s not the best explanation. . .

19.  Stephen King once said that his muse is a man who lives in the basement. Do you have a muse?

I definitely do not have a little man in my basement. I’m not sure that I do have a muse? I draw inspiration from a lot of sources.

30.  Do you accept prompts?

Yes, I will happily accept prompts, but please just understand that I write super slowly, so it may take a long time for me to actually finish the prompt. I just ask that you be patient and bear with me.

37.  Talk about your current wips.

I answered this one here. 

38.  Talk about a review that made your day.

I have gotten so many wonderful reviews that I absolutely cherish, and frequently reread when I need a little encouragement. I won’t repost the whole thing here, but a recent one I got on Old Wounds that made my day began with the sentences “Sjdjdkshddksk I hate this! Why did this have to happen!!!!? Damn you grass village, I hope you all see god soon.” When I read this I laughed so hard that I cried in public and my best friend was extremely concerned. I love reviews where the reader just leaves me their knee jerk, in the moment reactions like that.

39.  Do you ever get rude reviews and how do you deal with them?

I have been very fortunate so far to not receive any rude reviews or comments. Here’s hoping that continues.

[danetobelieve]

Merder, She Wrote || Sera and Winston

After everything that had happened, after the endless night and the vampire attack that had put Ricky in hospital and was going to leave Winston with a very nasty scar on their shoulder. Todd had been bragging to them about this awesome warehouse rave near Finney Docks, they said that the building was literally on the waterfront and that it was going to be the event of the century. Winston wasn’t usually the druggy type, they weren’t really the drinky type either. But tonight, tonight they needed to let loose and forget some of the shit that had happened recently. As they stood waiting for Sera, they watched the frost of their breath expand in front of them. Spotting a figure in the distance, they assumed it must be her and started over towards her. “Sera?” they asked, curious if they were wrong. 

Part of Sera hadn’t expected Winston to actually come up with any party plans that would interest her. But a warehouse rave? Oh, she’d be an idiot to say no to that one. Even a bad rave was a good time. For her, anyway. People got stupid at these things. Vulnerable. So if at any point she was ready to go, she could always muscle a loopy human from the crowd and salvage the night that way. And with the party by the docks? Sera made a point to be on time for this one, practically skipping as she found the two young things standing around. “The one and only,” she grinned widely, pointing their way. “You must be Winston?” She nodded, though her eyebrow lifted slightly when she looked over at his friend. “And you must be the famous Todd your pal here keeps boasting about.” She could practically feel the thumping bass from where they stood. “You foxy friends sure you can keep up in there?” She teased, nodding towards the warehouse. “Last chance to back out.”

Winston pulled off their glasses almost habitually and scrubbed their lenses clean. “Yeah, that’s me.” They smiled, shocked at the fact this was really happening. This really was outside of their comfort zone, but then again they had done plenty of other things in the last few months that were outside of their normal experience. Maybe this was no different. Hopefully nothing went wrong. It’d be nice to have a night free of anything too lethal. Todd nodded and made their introductions before smiling gently. “No, I’m definitely going, there’s no backing out now.” They didn’t give themselves a chance to leave and headed towards the warehouse entrance where there were two very large bouncers that Winston decided they weren’t going to piss off. Flashing them their ticket, they waited patiently for the bouncers to pat them down before slipping inside the club. Turning to Todd and Sera, they tried to make themselves heard over the boom of the music, “I’m going to find the bar.” 

There was just something in the way that Winston carried themself—the nervous-like cleaning of their glasses, for example—that told Sera this was, in fact, their first rodeo. That was fine. She had no trouble showing these two kids how it was done. Winston especially looked a hair more unsure of themselves, despite their strong words. “Let’s shake our groove thangs then, shall we?” She took a good long sip of the flask hidden in her boot before they went in. Dark, loud, sweaty. Everything a good rager should be. She was nodding along, one hand already in the air as she followed behind Winston. “First round’s on me!” She shouted, ordering up whatever bright neon drinks they were serving. Didn’t ask, didn’t matter. She just paid and received. That’s how this worked. She handed two each off to the other two in her group. One in each hand, she shouted loud again, a bright grin on her face. “To new friends! And this killer party!”

At the bar, Winston had already order themselves a drink before Sera came and ordered everyone a frankly disproportionate amount of alcohol. But considering that Winston had just finished the majority of what had been a very strong but also very small drink, they weren’t complaining. “Fuck yes!” they exclaimed slightly unsure of what they were actually meant to say here but there was something about the music, about the thrum of the bass, about the movement of the crowd, about the beat, about the tightness and how closely they were all packed into a single hot and humid space, it was invigorating and by the time that Winston had finished one drink, their second and third neon drink had been swallowed as well. Winston was purchasing themselves new drinks and pushing them into Sera’s hand as they danced. This was amazing. They’d never felt so free. They’d been clubbing, but this was something else entirely. The setting, the music, the people. The carefreeness of it all was more then enough to hook Winston in. “This isn’t really my thing,” they admitted but after everything that had happened they were really starting to re-examine what was acutally their thing, “but this is really fucking awesome.”

It hadn’t taken nearly as long as Sera had thought they would to ease into the flow of the evening, but it happened. This was one of her favorite kinds of evenings. Just completely losing herself into the music, the booze, the feeling. Hopping around with a bunch of sweaty humans wasn’t the best part but it was the fluidity, the life. And sure, maybe it was a little bit of whatever that babe in the bathroom had given her, but the colors were far fuckin’ out too. She couldn’t help but laugh out at Winston’s confession. So innocent, so sweet. “Hell yeah!” She laughed, jumping in time with the music. When did she put those neon rings around her wrists? There were so many too. She laughed, taking a quick look at the time. Shit. Party was almost over. How long had they been dancing? She found Todd and tugged him closer to where she and Winston were dancing. “Alright, alright. Show’s almost over. But--” that devilish grin returned as she yelled over the music once more. “One more shot for the road? Yeah?”

It had certainly been an evening, Winston was drenched in sweat and they weren’t entirely sure that it was all their own. But the boom and thud of the music and the twang of the bassline were more then enough to keep them from caring. They’d lost Todd and Sera several times throughout the evening and Todd had even convinced them to try something new. They weren’t normally like this but with everything that had happened they had found themselves barely hesitating. As the night clearly wound towards its end however, Winston was gathered alongside their friend for a final drink. Wiping sweat from their forehead, they grasped the neon drink and nodded. “One more shot for the road,” they affirmed already planning their next trip in their head, “but we’re definitely going to have to come back soon.” If they were going to have to deal with vampires, zombies and werewolves, not to mention everything else that was probably worse that they didn’t yet know about. Then they would also have to find new ways to enjoy their down time. Right? 

Sera couldn’t stop grinning at Winston. The world was bright and colorful and spinning but despite her initial reservations, she did have a good ass time. “That’s the spirit, dude!” She wrapped an arm around Winston’s shoulder, facing towards Todd and the circle the three of them made. Held up her drink and downed it quickly, then tossed the shot glass behind her. It shattered loudly behind the bar and instantly there was a bouncer coming at them. “Maybe just not here specifically,” she laughed, shoving Winston and Todd along as she bolted for the door and out into the cool night air. She stopped running when they were far away enough, so close they could almost touch the docks. Fuck. She was starving, she suddenly realized, casting a long, flirty smirk at Todd. She plopped into the soft earth, dizzy and out of breath. “What a night,” she grinned, pointing to Winston. “You’re much cooler than you look, my new funky friends.”

In their life, Winston was certain that they had never thrown anything glass. But here they were doing it. Following Sera’s example (something that they would have never considered if they were sober) they chucked the shot glass over their shoulder, grinned and bolted away from the bouncer. Normally they would’ve been wrapped up in panic about CCTV catching them and whether this could get them in trouble with the internship, but they weren’t thinking about that now and as they bolted from the rave, Winston gazed into the still night. They weren’t sure what time it was and they weren’t sure exactly where they were, but as they followed suit and collapsed onto the ground and Winston took a few breaths as the world spun around them, they were enjoying themselves. They missed the smirk between Todd and Sera, leaning back their head settling into the dirt. “Fuck meeeee,” they groaned with ectasy, “this was really something, you really weren’t kidding when you said that you knew how to have a good time.”

Another laugh burst from the blonde and Sera turned to watch Winston struggle in the dirt beside her. “Oh, I don’t kid about a good time,” she smirked, resting her head in her hand. “You’re not gonna get sick on me now, are you? Because that’s gonna kill the vibe, bruh.” Still a little dizzy, still a lot drunk, but after a few failed attempts she giggled her way to a standing position one more time. “Are we done partying for the night? Or—I know a gal who could probably get us into some of the after hours bars in town.” She held out her hand to help Winston up, raising a brow. “What do you say, kid? Wanna keep this party train rollin’?”

Glancing at their watch, Winston frowned as they realised what the time was. They were starting to feel more and more drunk, or were they just tired. They didn’t know but they knew that they didn’t want to find out, because they definitely didn’t want to make a mess. “I don’t think I’m going to be sick, but if I keep going then I definitely will be.” Winston had lied to Nic about having an iron stomach and then been very sick, this situation was completely different but they weren’t about to make the same mistake. “I admit that I’ve lost this challenge, you win, you’re more experienced and hardcore.” They grinned at her and glanced at Todd who seemed to be in a bit of a better state. “I think Todd is ready to keep going,” they tottered to their feet and pointed finger guns at their friend who returned the gesture and made some vague promise about how they were going to keep partying till the early hours of the morning. Sometimes being sensible was difficult.

The band was breaking up and Sera could sense an opening here. With her biggest, proudest grin of the night, she gave Winston a curt bow. “Thank you, thank you. Love hearing you finally admit I’m better than you,” she teased gleefully. Fuck, there went her stomach again. She’d eaten plenty but this always happened when she went as hard as she did tonight. “Further proof, right there.” She rolled her eyes at their fingergunning bromance moment. Slipped her arm through Todd’s as they started moving towards the road. Other party goers were trickling out of the warehouse, neon painted body parts speckled across the street back into town. “So you’re out, Winnie? You’re suuuure?” She waggled her eyebrows. 

Winston really did consider keeping the party going. There was potential for so much fun yet to be had, but their eyes were getting heavy, their limbs felt tired and it looked like Todd and Sera were about to become much better acquainted then Winston would’ve known was possible. “I am not so full of hubris that I cannot admit when I have been bested by a worthy opponent,” Winston chuckled before shaking their head, “I’m sure, I’m sure, I’m getting an uber home and I am going to try and sleep until my head stops spinning so violently.” Giving a vague wave, Winston turned and began to join the stream of people exiting the warehouses. 

Sera feigned a pout as Winston disappeared into the stream of tired drunks on their wayward journey home. Soon enough she’d be one of them, sure, but the night was fae from over for her. For Todd? She cast a glance his way. He seemed like a cute, personable guy. And sure, they’d had a good ass time tonight. But the boy was human. And that’s where her loyalties instantly severed. Her stomach growled. Taking his hand, she started backtracking towards the dark waters below the docks, making sure to stay out of sight of the others around them. “On second thought,” she tilted her head, tugging him along. “What do you say we go for a swim?”

[incarnateirony]

One of the funniest things I’ve encountered recently is antis, from multiple fandom lanes tbh (lbr, they’re usually alternate-ship motivated), but one in particular this last few weeks, being absolutely incensed that I will not argue with them, and have zero reason to prove my read to them.

Various conversations have gone:

Me: “Listen, you can have your read and I can have mine. In the end, one will be right and one will be wrong. Or hell, maybe we’re both wrong. But we can argue circles all day about kiss vs true love or whatever the timeless stupid debate is until we’re blue in the face and nobody is going to be able to change the validity of anybody’s read, especially contingent on the material anybody builds their read from. If your read works for you, so be it.”

Them: “EXCUSE ME?”

Like, what, I’m sorry, does it bother you that I literally don’t have to run the same argument for the thousandth time with you as your predecessors? They went off on a rage fest after that and I’m just sitting over here with my coffee mug like-- I’m sorry, you have me confused with someone who cares. I already said you have the right to your read as long as it works for you. The simple fact is, even if I could demolish it to your face 17 ways to sunday, I won’t, unless you come chumming to try to slap me with it, and even then, I’m not gonna do it in the standard method of piss warring that goes on here and reduces complex texts to My Ship > Your Ship. If you get this mad about it, I’m going to have to assume that somewhere subconsciously, your read isn’t working as well for you as you want, and it bothers you that someone else’s read is securely working for them, because that’s all that really reduces to. And that’s not my problem or responsibility.

This ironically comes to heads of them claiming you think your read is better than theirs. I mean, well, yeah, implicitly; but just as implicitly the sheer tonal offense that I feel no need to justify anything implies they feel theirs is better too. Of course we think, silently at least, that our reads are right. If we didn’t see them, they wouldn’t be our reads. That’s kind of how this works. 

Other ones that piss them off seem to be not even bothering to rehash things I’ve blogged about for years. “I don’t think Dabb is using that theology!”

“Listen, whether you understand it or want to learn it or not is up to you. If you never read the content presented to you for fear that it may have Destiel Cooties, you’re never going to learn what, why or how. Neverminding of course that the better part of my meta orbits around concepts like souls, cosmogenics, and aeons -- you’ve already allocated what you think my meta is about and thus you will never read it. In never reading it, you will never consider it. I can’t force anybody to educate themselves on what this philosophy in play is, but trying to call it just interpretation at this phase in the game is tantamount to calling it Just Interpretation that seasons 4-5 had heavy christian influence and was loosely following the book of revelations as its source despite all the dogma, quotes, symbolism, verses and everything else.”

“EXCUSE YOU?”

I mean-- it is what it is. 

“How dare you sit so smugly!!”

I mean, um. Yeah. If one of us is “the broken clock is right twice a series run” in spec and the other one is prewriting entire episodes or mytharc runs, I really don’t have to sit here and pat-slap around anybody else’s stuff. Even if they’re really, really mad for some reason. Cuz here’s the trap: I pat-slap it around and they get mad about DiFfErEnT oPinIonS. 

In fact this, too, happened.

There’s a multiship server I’m in where everybody has their own sandboxes to play in. While people from a few given ships haven’t figured out how to not be hostile cross-area (though tend to be dealt with swiftly when done so), generally--you stay in your sandbox, you’re left alone.

Now, someone came with very (Ship A) goggled lenses. They could have stayed in their ship corner, squii’ed with like minded people. But instead, they came into a general/spoiler room yelling their idea. Now quite literally, their idea doesn’t add up, not remotely. If someone politely says, “I disagree, and here’s why,” especially without directly attacking a ship but rather the premise of the presentation as it stands within the sum of the mytharc, and doesn’t even have to evoke their own ship into it -- that’s not ship warring. And hell, that’s not being mean. You go to a general discussion area in a server that’s intersectional and you’re going to get general discussion from people with other perspectives. Why this basic self care is beyond them, I’m unclear. 

That’s not being bullied. It just means there’s other takes out there, and if you choose to present those takes in general zones, people can and probably will politely disagree with you. Emphasis on “politely.” Now, polite doesn’t mean putting squishy words and cowing to a way where everybody’s take is completely untouched and everybody floats in their own conversational bubbles never really actually encountering each other’s points of view. It means not extremizing it and trying to warp social justice narratives (eg, ableist, whatever) off of the first impact. It means not reading everything in absolute bad faith. It means not calling people cunts or whatever. Those things clearly aren’t polite. But if you’re going to go to a general speculation zone, you have to be prepared for other forms of speculation.

Now, that doesn’t mean you have to argue with the other forms of speculation. Nobody’s entitled to your time. But the simple acknowledgement that there may be other speculation is how this works. You can’t yell “all interpretations are equal” and then rove through general areas, demanding half cracked thoughts of impulse and wishlists that you throw out like law never be presented with another point of view. If you want that, go to a location, or a channel, or whatever where people are literally coalesced that have similar POV/wishlist/egregore/whatever.

Why. Is this. Hard.

When it comes down to it, we’re in the final run. There are seven episodes left. When this is done, what’s done is done. While there may be several ways to interpret the final product, most spec and arguments about who’s gonna die and who’s gonna come back and who’s the endgame XYZ be it unit/pair or family or whatever the FUCK else? Those are gonna be pretty well defined. There’s no infinite extension, no way to extend it to next year while people’s reads stretch more thin than Sam’s rubber band soul. No way to manipulate theories over and over again. That theory you’re sitting on? You have a few episodes left to build on that. After that, it’s done. 

I can’t emphasize enough how pointless it is to argue with people and their various overstretched theories in any given lane. Because what’s gonna happen is gonna happen. Now, if you’re confident in your read, rather than making confused noises or rejoicing overloud because the clock finally appropriately tolled twelve for the first time in 5, 10, 15 years for you; that’s fine. Sit confident.

You know what isn’t confident?

Aggressively feeling the need to prove your worth or merit against reads, a large sum of which in this fandom are outright comical. And let’s face it. We all know it. Somewhere even within your (character) or (ship) lane you’ve even found some sort of spec or opinion that even you kind of hide your face in your hand in embarrassment behind your screen. So why the hell are you contending with opposite points just as ridiculous?

Come on y’all.

If you can’t have nuanced intersectional conversation to safeguard your opinion, don’t go to general areas. If you can’t have that intersectional conversation without turning into a kindergarten slapfight, why even bother? 

I’m not saying to not ideashare or whatever. But this fandom pretends to have no idea what that is anymore, even though most of y’all are grown assed adults or at least pretty damn close. If your read is so sensitive and fragile that the slightest breath contrary to it sends it and you shattering and off into a hysterical frenzy of being offended, maybe it’s better to not try to engage in those areas.

The louder anyone crows in someone’s face trying to incite fights, the less confident they are. It’s that simple. It’s a simple validation thing, “VALIDATE MEEEE FIGHT MEEEEE” we see it all the time even outside of fandom. Why everybody thinks human psychology is so vastly different between fandom and political twitter is a mystery. So why the hell.

It’s not your responsibility to bring down your level of confidence to someone else’s just because they refuse to recalibrate and figure out why they’re so dependent on argued validation, and it’s not wrong to be confident, especially if you have damn good reason to be confident. Confidence does not come in the claim of confidence, but in the principle of behavior around the material in which you are confident. Everything else is disingenuous hot air that bloats the sum of our fandom conversation and sets it on volatile explosion risk on any given day.

[patchdotexe]

explorers of arvus: the day without dawn / 7.23.19

last time on d&d, we escaped the castle in the dead grove

this time on d&d, we're going back, because WE FUCKED UP

[everyone rolls arcana]

DM: [scary] There is nothing in [this book] about this. charlie: [voice cracks] SWEET,

charlie: so i cast darkvision on me, and i now have eyeballs

halvkar: [booming evil voice] It is customary to kneel before a god. charlie: [leans over and puts her middle finger up] 

halvkar: You do not need to fear, child. charlie: [shrill] IM FEARING A WHOLE LOT 

halvkar: [laughs] charlie: [quietly] oh man, hes got an evil laugh and everything

[giggling during a serious scene bc i accidentally hit the X mark we use to denote dead tokens so charlie just Died for a sec] 

charlie dissociates for a hot sec 

(pepper stood on my keyboard) 

"shes kinda dumb, she has a wisdom score of no" 

OH GOD I THINK SIERON JUST GOT POSSESSED 

taure: mozzy. time to fart. 

SHIT. FUCK. SHIT SHIT SHIT 

PLOT ): 

jorb: what CAN i do? summer: fart solar: perish! summer: fart 

[taure screaming nonsense]

IM CRING, MOZZY CAST THE ULTIMATE FART

THIS IS HOW WE'RE GONNA DEFEAT THE GODKING 

solar: can we break the fire bra penn: its a hot bra, can we break it 

charlie: [tries to hold sieron's hand, nearly gets burned] WAKE UP, YOU IDIOT! [SMACKS HIM WITH HER QUARTERSTAFF] 

also, right before this: summer: [charlie] can't stand up to a smoke fucker. 

"[crying] i love this fart" 

kaepora is stuck in the fart

"sieron's stuck in a cutscene, it's fine!" 

taure: [swings sword through halvkar] FIGHT! ME! YOU! COWARD! [ENTIRE CALL GOES "OOOOOOOOO"] 

"its double movement to fly through the fart zone" 

charlie: [blows up the brazier] [grins at halvkar] WHAT NOW, BITCH? 

CHARLIE AND TAURE KEEP PISSING HALVKAR OFF ITS GREAT 

"you have disadvantage, roll again"

HOLY SHIT TAURE CAST "COMPELLED DUEL" ON HALVKAR

AW IT DIDNT WORK 

THAT WAS SO FUCKING BALLSY

WE FARTED SOMEONE OUT A WINDOW 

thorne: you know what? i can see the other undead from here. thorne, who can snipe anyone they can see: I CAN SEE THE OTHER UNDEAD FROM HERE. 

ALL SHALL ENTER THE FART ZONE 

charlie: im gonna firebolt the one closest to mozzy. [rolls a 1] FUCK. I DID MY COOL SHIT FOR THE DAY 

"kaepora doesnt really want to enter the fart zone," 

FART ZOOOOONE 

thorne is just. invisible the whole time btw. and fucking shit up but we cANT SEE THEM 

mozzy nearly farted TAURE out the window 

literally EVERYONE is calling it the fart zone btw. it is the legitimate term we use. 

MOZZY CAN FART INFINITELY 

"HE CAN'T ACTUALLY ENTER THE FART ZONE BECAUSE THE FART ZONE IS FULL!" 

IM GONNA CRY 

"could i combine firebolt and ray of frost to make really hot water?" 

"that's a terrible fire! here we go-- oh, that's even worse" 

[charlie sits a pew on fire, wonders why she did that] 

"solid snake is throwing acid!" 

ULTIMATE FART HAS KILLED MORE PEOPLE THAN THE REST OF THE PARTY 

MOZZY GOT NAT20 ON HIS FIRST DEATH SAVING THROW :D 

i tried to shove an undead into the fire but i rolled a 2 

[charlie voice] thats so fucking valid 

EVEYRHTING IS ON FIRE

[starts singing tokyo house party] THE FIRE'S SPREAD TO THE BASEMENT NOWWWWWW / TO EVERY PART OF MEEEEE EEE EEEEE

havent been tweeting bc ive been alternating between combat and my cat :V 

charlie jumps out a window 

time for a mercy kill ): 

(uldnvard is the guy we just mercykilled)

[emotional moment] ... charlie: is mozzy on FIRE? 

charlie: [serious] you have seen me light shit on fire. i will do it for you.