#yuki’s a drunk mess and confesses things they shouldn’t

[teeth-farie]

Hhhh a scene in my head for that faux replaced au

Yuki gives a tentative swish of the wine in their glass, bringing it up to their nose to sniff. You watch, amusement dancing in your eye while you sip from your own glass. They take a sip and scrunch their nose in disgruntlement. “Eugh, nope, still don’t like wine.” They continue to sip anyway, cupping the glass in both of their hands.

“You know, you’re doing a lot better than I thought you would.” You say, crossing one leg over the other. Yuki peers up from their glass—and with the way they’re hunched in their seat in the couch, the way their wide eyes and round glasses lock with yours, you have the overwhelming desire to pinch their cheeks. “What do you mean?”

“Well, we’re in hell, aren’t we?” You chuckle, taking another sip of your wine. It’s a bitter red and dry on your tongue, the faint burn seeping down your throat and spreading through your chest. Truly, it’s a miracle you got your hands on human world alcohol. “Someone so sweet natured as you would have gotten eaten up in a day.” You can see why the brothers like them so much. They’re soft around the edges, so kind and naive- it’d be easy for them to fall into the wrong hands. Luckily for Yuki, you aren’t a bad person.

“It’s good that I have you then!” Yuki takes another drink, then sputters into the glass. “I-I mean the brothers, it’s good I have the brothers. I know I’m not your responsibility, I don’t want to be like some baby you have to watch over—“

Your laugh cuts them off and their face burns hot. “I get what you mean. Besides, it’s good to have trust in your fellow human, right?”

Yuki tugs on the sleeves of their cardigan, a high pitched little laugh bubbling from their lips. “Y-yeah, I guess so!”

They’re still so nervous around you, blubbering about and correcting themselves over the tiniest thing. It reminds you a lot of Levi. Maybe that’s why they get along so well together. You just wish Yuki would be more comfortable around you like they are with the brothers. Ah, well, they’ll perk up eventually.

“Don’t stress about it too much. Let’s make a toast,” you grab your glass, holding it out across the low table between your couches. Yuki fumbles with their glass before thrusting it out, the deep red wine sloshing just shy of the rim. “To sticking together.”

Yuki nudges their glass against your with a tiny clink. “To sticking together!”

…

Yuki is more of a lightweight than you expected. They’ve finished their first glass and are halfway into their second. “You know,” they slump back against the couch cushions. “When I first came here and I heard ‘bout you I thought ‘wowww, they’re so strong’.” They emphasize ‘strong’ with a deeper tone, an ever present smile on their face—one that’s shows the little gap between their front two teeth.

“You made pacts with all the brothers! I think you’re so cool,” Yuki giggles, rubbing at their flushed cheeks. “It’s been a while since I’ve drinken.”

“Drank.” You correct.

“That too.”

You snort, rolling your eyes. Yuki taps their fingers on the table, gathering your attention back on them. “I- before, I said I was jealous.” Their fluffy brown hair falls in their face and the blow a lock away. “Do you still feel that way?” You’re tuning in more. You truly hope Yuki hasn’t formed a distaste, that they haven’t grown to see you as a threat.

“Yeah.” They say, then wave their hands wildly. “Not of you!! I, uh,” Yuki swallows and tugs at the collar of their sweater. “The brothers..they get someone like you…” they clench their hands together, balled up fists in their lap. “To be their master! Why can’t I have that?”

What?

“Yuki, what are you saying-“

Yuki stands abruptly, knees knocking into the table, lips pressed together in a thin line. “I..I don’t think it’s fair! They get to have you all to themselves!” They’re even redder, chest heaving under the baggy fabric of their clothes.

You can only sit there, purely astonished by their..confession? Yuki’s stumbling around the table, tripping over their shoes and falling onto your chest. You raise the half empty glass in time, a near catastrophe of staining red you’d have to explain to the boys. You maneuver around them, setting your glass in the table and grabbing their shoulders. “Yuki, Yuki, what are you doing?”

Yuki slides down onto the floor with a thump, grabbing onto the fabric of your shirt. “Hehe..I like it when you say my name..” they rub their cheek on your knee, sitting on folded legs below you. “I want you to be my master, too. I wanna- I wanna,” Yuki curls their fingers around the bend of your knee, looking up at you so pitifully. “Make me yours, we-we can do a human contract- I can be a pet just like them-“

“Yuki-“

“I can be better, I swear,”

“Yuki-!”

“I love you, master—“

“YUKI!”

You grab them by the shoulders and shake them. Yuki whines, grabbing onto your wrists and sitting up. Their blurry eyes finally look fully into yours, their glasses smudged and crooked. Then, like they’ve finally come to, their face blooms beet red and they stumble back, bumping into every piece of furniture in the process.

“Oh my god, oh my god,”

“It’s ok, calm down,”

“I-I have to go!”

Yuki clambers up, slipping on their shoes and rushing out the door of the lounge and into the faded sound of the club. You have no doubt they’ve bumped into either Asmo or Mammon in their haste, the faint voices like a warbling whisper in your ear. You’re left alone in the lounge, smelling of wine and Yuki’s sweet cologne, left with the memory of what the fuck just happened?

[nad-zeta]

Headcanon: How the boys and MC farts

Ayeeeeee love got a really hilarious idea and I really hope it is not offensive lol??? like… um …. how warlords and MC fart I guess?? like o boi dats awkward LOLOL; just had the shitty(note the pun) idea and cant stop asking you hehee

Hi hi, love! 🌻😳Thank you so much for the request and omw I was dying laughing when I first read this idea hehe! 😂❤I hope you enjoy love and I hope you have the best day! 😂😂

Nobunaga

Just like the powerful commander he is, his farts are loud and proud

Will shamelessly fart in front of EVERYBODY during the war councils

“What’s that sound My lord.” Mitsunari asked confused by the loud thunderous sound ripping through the council room

“That would be the sound of my fart.” (¬‿¬)

“Oh, well it is quite majestic my Lord” (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

Has no shame about letting one rip

That would definitely make this commander a confident farter

Masamune

I think Masamune is the Prompt farter

This warlord clown always has one locked away and ready to go

Just say the word and he will let one rip without a second thought 

His farts are also loud and proud

Will 9/10 time fart on Mitsuhide when he is busy losing at a battle of wits against the sneaky boi, kinda like how an older sibling would fart in a younger sibling’s face… you know for laughs

Also loves to compete with other peoples farts, if someone farts near him he will smile that mischievous smile of his, “Challenge accepted”

Mitsunari

Mitsunari is a strategic farter

He is the type that would let one rip and then smile like it never happened

His farts are actually pretty cute and angelic sounding

His Celestial Farts are soft and delicate, it is just a very small clear fart with no odour at all

Like a little toot

Ieyasu

We have a dishonest farter here

He will legit fart and then blame the nearest person or animal

“Pttttffftt”

“Hey, Masamune can you not fart so close to me.”

“Lad, that didn’t even sound like one of my farts, this is what my farts sound like.”

“PPPPPTTTTTFFFFFFTTTTTTFFF”

After he has eaten a particularly spicy meal this boy’s farts will be dead silent but VIOLENT!

It slipped out so quickly and silently, yet had the power to kill an army

Hideyoshi

Hideyoshi is an honest farter

He wouldn’t be particularly proud of his farts like Masamune or Nobu, but he also won’t shy away from admitting that he farted

Especially when he is drunk

Lets one slip during war council

It comes out like a medium toot

“Oooh excuse me, I just farted”

Will walk over to the window to crack it open, even though it doesn’t really stink

If he is drunk, he will definitely partake in a farting contest with Masamune

Mitsuhide

These farts come out like the sound of a snek

Sssssssssssssssst

“Mitsuhide did you just sis or was that a fart.”

“Golly me, whatever could you be talking about, little mouse.”

He is a disappointed farter, he will give off, soft farts with no odour.

No matter how hard he tries to fart as loudly as his fellow warlords, they always just seem to just fizz out.

This fart can only be classified as one thing a dud fart, and it usually leaves the farter feeling a little disappointed.

Kenshin

Kenshin is one of those classified under the snart

The only time bunny boy farts is when he sneezes or when you tickle him, and he is laughing too much

Like Mitsuhide and Mitsunari, his farts comes across as soft and graceful just like him

It kind of reminds you of a little bunny sneeze

One day Shingen felt like messing with Kenshin and tickled his nose with a feather to make him sneeze, and that’s when it happened

One little fart slipped lose

The warlords couldn’t tell if the bunny on Kenshin’s lap had sneezed or if it was a fart

Either way, it brought tears to their eyes, their lord was so graceful amd cute in everything he does

Otherwise, bunny boi is classified as a miserable farter, those who are simply unable to fart

Yukimura

This boy is 100% a shy and nervous farter

He will let one rip loud and proud when he is alone, but in company, the farts come out bit for bit

He is someone who would stop mid fart if he senses someone coming

During banquets, this boy will start to feel the fart coming on

“pt,pt,pt-pt,pt-pt-pt,pop,pop-pop-pop-POW!”

Finally relief.... until

“Do you guy smell something.” Sasuke very dramatically gasps for air 

Cue Yukimura going super red

“N-no, here try these sticky buns,” Yuki will legit stuff Sasuke’s face with food to distract him from the fact that he just farted

Shingen

Daddy Shingen is definitely a clever farter

He has to be, when he is trying to flirt with and impress the ladies

Will be someone who coughs and farts at the same time, just to mask the fact that he farted

Or he will wait for the perfect moment when Kenshin slams his fist on the table in frustration, at the fact that, no one is willing to fight with him during the banquet

If his farts had to be something, it would be a rusty gate fart

As in, it will sound like the driest and squeaky fart sound you have ever heard

Sasuke

This boy staying true to science, is a scientific farter

He will mostly be one of those who keep their farts in a jar and then use it to make deadly smoke bombs

He has a skillsaw kind of fart, the kind that vibrates the farter, as it gets released.

It shakes him up while people back away slowly, kinda low key sounds like an electric saw ripping through wood.

“Sasuke, dude did you just fart.”

“Of course, releasing pent up gas is healthy, plus now I have some fresh gas to use for my newest smoke bomb.”

“You are seriously gross man.”

MC

You are classified as a foolish farter

The one who lowkey keeps their farts in when you are in public

Will let it rip when in the comfort of your own presence, but when in front of the warlords

You will suck that fart so far up your ass, lest you want to be teased for days

Especially after the one time, you farted in front of the kitsune

“Hey, Mitsu did you smell something.” you asked super innocently 

“I believe that is the smell of your farts, smelly little mouse, perhaps you shouldn’t have eaten those beans last night.” (¬‿¬)

“I have no idea what you are talking about Mitsu, I was talking about the smell of those flowers over there, unless you want to confess that it was, in fact, you that farted” (☞ﾟ∀ﾟ)☞

“Hmmm, the fox smells his own hole, my dear.” (◕‿◕✿)

Mitus smirked as he gave you one final head pat and retreated back for some fresh air

I hope you enjoyed it dear! ❤❤🌻