#youre afraid you have no purpose and your friend group will outgrow you

[sort-of-a-hero-that-way]

3 middle aged men with similar fears and anxieties spending the night together feeling less alone

[melzula]

All I Ever Wanted

pairing: zuko x reader

notes: this was originally requested by an anon but i also took inspiration from mitski’s song “your best american girl” while writing this. give it a listen during your read !

summary: as a peasant and servant girl for the palace, you should have known better than to fall for the Prince

The sun is warm against your skin and the grass is soft beneath you as you land on your back in a fit of giggles. Azula is unamused by your antics, but Zuko finds himself laughing right along with you. It’s a peaceful summer’s day in the palace gardens, and you spend it as you would any other day by playing with your friends.

“I caught you,” you tell him with a breathless laugh after turning your head to face him.

“No way, I was just going easy on you,” he argues with playful grin, his nose nearly brushing against your own due to your close proximity on the grass. Your heart beats fast in your rib cage as you try to ignore the rising heat on your face and play it off as a result of your exhaustion and not your nerves from lying with the Prince. You haven’t realized it yourself, but you have a crush on Zuko, a painfully obvious one that he hasn’t seemed to notice yet. What you also don’t realize is that he reciprocates the feeling, and he shares the thrill that comes with being your playmate.

“Are you two done yet?” Azula finally interrupts with a roll of her eyes as she offers you her hand and helps you up from the ground. “It’s my turn to hide this time.”

“I don’t think we can play anymore,” Zuko notes with a frown as his mother makes her way towards your group. You quickly bow in respect to the Fire Lady, but she waves you off with a smile.

“I’m sorry, y/n, but Zuko and Azula must attend their fire bending lessons now. I’m afraid playtime is over for today,” she informs you apologetically.

“Yes, Fire Lady Ursa,” you reply politely before turning to give both of your friends departing hugs. “Bye Zuko, bye Azula!”

“It’s too bad you’re not a fire bender,” Azula remarks after halfheartedly returning your embrace. “Maybe dad would let us play with you more if you were.”

Her words make your body hot with embarrassment and shame, and though you don’t voice your discomfort Ursa is instantly able to pick up on it. With a scolding glare, the Fire Lady quickly urges her daughter to apologize.

“Azula, that is not a nice thing to say to a friend.”

“But it’s true,” the girl mutters under her breath only to have her mother drag her away before she can get the chance to say anything else. Zuko hesitates then, giving you an apologetic look and promising to play with you tomorrow before rushing after Ursa and Azula.

You’ve never really cared about being a non-bender, but there’s something about Azula’s words that has you questioning your worth. As the daughter of a royal family servant with no title or money to her name, you knew you were lucky to be able to grow up in the palace and play with the Fire Lord’s children. However, you never once realized that you weren’t their equal. They were royalty, a Prince and a Princess destined to become powerful benders and ruthless leaders of the Fire Nation, and you were simply a girl who would one day grow up to live a life of servitude. You had no real future or purpose ahead of you, not like they did, and yet you were the only one unaware of your unfortunate fate.

Perhaps it’s because they never treated you in such a way, and your mother did her best to shield you from your true heritage. For now you could grow up blissfully unaware of the fact that your friends would one day outgrow you.

“Mom?” Zuko asks once they’re safe inside the palace. “Do you like y/n?”

“She’s a sweet girl,” Ursa notes with a faint smile, “and she makes you both happy. So yes, I like her.”

“Then why doesn’t Dad?”

The Fire Lady’s smile fades into a remorseful frown, and she simply ushers her son forward with a shake of her head. “Let’s not worry about that now. You’re going to be late for your lesson.”

Zuko isn’t satisfied with her answer, but he isn’t give a chance to discuss it further with her. For now, he remains content with the fact that he likes you, and his mother likes you.

That is enough for him.

~~~

The day is calm as you carefully hang the clothes to dry and enjoy the warmth of the sun basking on your skin. It’s rare that you get tasked with the outdoor chores, so you savor the opportunity for as long as you can. Doing the royal family’s laundry certainly beats scrubbing the floors of the palace, and you are grateful the spirits have taken mercy upon you today.

You’re freshly fifteen and the summer is just beginning. You’ve grown into a well-mannered young woman, and you’re old enough now to be able to take on some of the work that once fell to your mother. One day you will take her place and continue to serve the royal family until you’re no longer physically able. You’ll never get to leave, but you consider yourself grateful to live on the palace grounds. You will forever have a roof over your head, food on the table, and, most importantly, your friends.

You take great care to pin Azula’s dresses down without getting any creases or wrinkles in the fabric, and you’re so lost in thought that you don’t notice the figure carefully creeping up behind you. You’re too busy reciting the words to an old Fire Nation folk song your mother had taught you to pay any mind to your surroundings, and it gives Zuko the perfect opportunity to catch you by surprise.

“Y/n!” He exclaims with a grin as his hands land firmly upon your shoulders. You nearly jump out of your skin at the act, and your reaction has the Fire Prince laughing so hard his cheeks begin to hurt.

“Zuko!” You scold with an irritated scowl as you chuck a handful of clothespins at him in retaliation. “You need to stop doing that!”

“I’m sorry, you just make it so easy,” he teases with a light nudge to your side before taking it upon himself to pick up the pins you’d discarded.

“Shouldn’t you be getting ready to leave for Ember Island?” You ask him with a quizzical look as you resume your previous work of hanging the clothes.

“That’s actually what I was coming to talk to you about,” he admits with a sheepish smile. “I want you to come with us.”

“What? You’re not serious, are you?” You retort apprehensively, halting your movements to gauge his reaction for any hint of insincerity or humor.

“I am serious. You deserve to have fun once in a while too,” he notes with a careful smile. You’re too oblivious to notice the look of admiration on his face and definitely too concerned with finding a way to let him down gently to realize he’s inviting you because he likes you. Despite your own feelings for the Prince you’ve developed over the years, you’re much too self-depreciating to ever believe Zuko could possibly feel the same. If only you knew.

“I can’t just up and leave! There’s work to be done, a-and my mother would be so upset with me if I abandoned my chores and-“

“Azula will tell our father she wishes to bring you along as a personal servant so you can come with us, and someone else will be tasked with taking on your work while you’re away. There’s no way your mom could be upset with you for serving the Princess, could she?”

“Azula would really do that for me?” You question meekly, a hopeful glint in your eyes as you hang on to his every word. You’re trying your best not to get your hopes up, but you wish for nothing more than to leave the capital city to see the ocean for the first time and feel the sand beneath your feet. As the daughter of a servant and now a servant yourself, you know you’d never get a chance like this if not for the fact that the siblings had grown fond of you over your years of friendship together. You’re lucky, because you know without them you’d truly be nothing more than a floor scrubbing peasant.

“Of course she would, she wants you there just as much as I do,” Zuko assures you. Gently taking your hands in his own, he gives them a comforting squeeze and looks into your eyes with a loving smile. “We leave tomorrow morning. Bring enough clothes to last you three days and a bathing suit.”

“I don’t own one,” you admit with an embarrassed frown, but your friend doesn’t display any sign of judgement in the slightest towards your shortcomings.

“Then I’ll take you shopping myself when we get there.”

Your heart melts at his words, your gaze falling to the ground bashfully as you try not to dwell on the fact that he’s still holding your hands. You’re in love with the Prince, and the Prince is in love with you, and everyone but you has figured out just how much you mean to each other.

Even Fire Lord Ozai, who odiously watches the scene unfold before him from the top of the palace balcony.

~~~

The shores of Ember Island are beautiful.

The waves almost seem to sparkle underneath the moonlight as they crash peacefully against the shore, and down below the lively chatter of your friends carries through the air and fills your heart with contentment. You’ve had the most perfect time here at the beach, and it pains you to know that tonight will be your last night of freedom before you must return home and resume your life as a servant girl.

The wooden doors behind you carefully slide open and closed, and soon a familiar warmth joins you out on the balcony. For a while you say nothing, simply enjoying the closeness of him as you watch Azula, Ty Lee, and Mai practice tricks in the sand below. You don’t know how to thank the Prince for all he’s done for you, for always looking out for you since you were children, for never once treating you as less than for your heritage. You don’t know how to tell him that you love him with your entire being.

So he does it for you.

“I got you something,” Zuko says after a moment’s silence, waiting for you to turn your gaze to him so he may pull out a small clam from beneath his robes. You raise a curious eyebrow at his offering as he gestures for you to take it.

“A clam shell?” You note inquisitively as you turn the gift around in your palms, carefully feeling out its grooves and intricate ridges.

“Open it,” he directs you quietly, anxiously watching your movements with bated breath.

You smile curiously at your friend before delicately pulling the top half of the shell open to reveal the contents inside. Your eyes widen in surprise at the gift that greets you, and you immediately look up to Zuko to ensure this isn’t some kind of joke.

Inside the clam sits a beautiful gold necklace with a dainty sun pendant resting in the center that shimmers under the light of the moon. It’s beautiful, and it’s certainly worth more than your own life, which is why you immediately try to hand it back to him.

“I-I can’t accept this!” You hastily insist with a quick shake of your head as you struggle to return the clam to him. “It’s too nice!”

“You can accept this,” Zuko reassures you as he carefully pushes the gift back towards you. When his efforts fail due to your persistent attempts to give back the shell, he lets out a sigh and carefully removes the necklace from the clam. “Y/n, I want you to have it.”

“But why?” You demand apprehensively, almost flinching away when he moves towards you with the necklace. You’re completely overwhelmed by his gift and unsure of what it means or why you’d ever be deserving of such a thing. You don’t want to take advantage of his kindness or his status, and you feel like he’s done more than enough for you by bringing you along on this trip, so it just feels wrong of you to take it.

“Because you deserve nice things too,” Zuko explains, and after giving you a pointed look you finally allow him to carefully put the necklace on you. The sun rests daintily along your neck, and he thinks it suits you perfectly. “I brought you on this trip because I wanted you to have fun for once, but also because… well, because I love you, and I thought a romantic setting might make it easier to tell you that.”

“You love me?”

“You haven’t noticed?” He retorts with a meek smile. “I’m not the best at words, but I know that I’ve loved you since we were children feeding turtle ducks in the pond and playing tag in the gardens. You have the purest heart of anyone I know, the sweetest smile, you are everything to me. I hope that by accepting this gift, you’ll be accepting me as someone worthy enough to be your boyfriend.”

“Oh, Zuko…” you murmur softly, eyes full of tears as you throw yourself into his arms and hug him as tight as humanly possible. You’re still shocked by the fact that the boy you love will all your heart feels the same, but you try to remind yourself not to look a gift horse in the mouth. Zuko is right when he says that you deserve to enjoy what life has to offer just as much as he does, so maybe it’s time you finally start allowing yourself the chance to finally let your guard down. You can be more than just a servant girl from the palace.

You can be happy.

~~~

You sit quietly before the vanity mirror as your mother tediously brushes through your hair to ensure not a single strand is out of place. The wrinkles in her skin crease with her nerves as she carefully begins to pin your hair back into the perfect top knot. Immediately after your return home from Ember Island, you were informed that the Fire Lord wished to speak with you. You were expected to drop your chores for the day and make yourself decent before presenting yourself to him. His request to see you surprised you considering the fact you previously believed he didn’t even know of your existence, but it made you nervous all the same. If anything were to go wrong during your meeting, you’d be jeopardizing both yours and your mother’s jobs.

“Make sure to sit up straight and no slouching,” she reminds you quietly while stopping to admire her work. “Hold your tongue until he allows you to speak and thank him for all he has done for us. It is a great honor to speak to Fire Lord Ozai, so you must treat it as such.”

“Mother, what could the Fire Lord possibly want to talk to me about?”

She doesn’t meet your eyes at first, looking away as if contemplating carefully what her next words should be. With a sigh, she sets the brush down and looks at you through the reflection. “Word has spread quickly about you and Prince Zuko, and I think he knows.”

You swallow nervously at her admission, absently brushing your fingers against the sun that hangs around your neck. You never once considered what Zuko’s father would think about his son’s choice of a partner; Ursa had always treated you as one of her own, and Azula considered you to be a good friend, but what would Ozai say of the peasant girl who had stolen his son’s heart?

You don’t have much time to mull over it further as a guard arrives to escort you from your quarters to the throne room. All eyes seem to follow you as you walk through the palace, the gold and red hues overwhelming your senses as you do your best to remain calm. You have no idea what awaits you at the end of the hallway, but there’s no escape now as the grand doors open and you’re pushed inside.

Ozai sits on the throne with a wall of flames roaring behind him. His features are stoic but his gaze is menacing as his eyes watch your meager form approach. You immediately bow in respect to the man once you reach him and kneel before his seated figure. Just as your mother instructed, you say nothing until you are spoken to.

“So you’re the girl my son has chosen to be his partner?” He drawls with a raised brow, obviously not impressed by the person before him.

“Yes, sir. It is an honor to present myself to you, my Lord,” you profess as earnestly as possible while adding another bow for good measure. You need his approval not only to continue dating Zuko, but also to ensure you and your mother are both able to continue living behind the palace walls. Even if you are there as servants tucked away in the peasant quarters, it certainly is a better place to be than out in the streets.

“I know who you are, child,” Ozai scoffs callously as he peers down at you from his place on the throne. “You are the peasant girl who managed to worm her way into the lives of my children. You are a lowly servant with nothing to your name and nothing special about you, and yet you have managed to corrupt my only son."

“Fire Lord Ozai, I-I apologize if my actions have upset you,” you quickly try to interject, but he holds a hand up and signals you to halt your pathetic rambling. Ozai does not have the time nor care to hear your excuses or explanations. That’s not what this meeting is for.

“Do you know how poorly it would reflect on me to have Zuko galavanting around the palace with a servant? Do you know how poorly it reflects on him to be seen with you? It’s a disgrace, and it is something I will not tolerate.”

“I know,” you utter quietly, trying to make yourself appear as small as you feel on the inside. Despite what Zuko has told you, you know that his father is right. You are nothing compared to him. He is the sun, the Prince, the heir to the throne. His future ahead is bright, and there is much for him to accomplish. You have no future, no plans for your life, nothing as grand or important as him and Azula. You are not the sun or the moon or even the stars that hang in his sky, you are insignificant, and you will never be worthy enough to be his.

“A future Fire Lord cannot have a maid as a wife. You must break his heart so that he no longer wants anything to do with you, so that he can move on and find a girl more worthy of becoming the future Fire Lady. You must make it appear to be your own doing and not mine, otherwise it won’t work. Have I made myself clear, child?”

“Yes, Fire Lord Ozai,” you whisper softly, a single tear sliding down your cheek as you bow to the cruel man before you. “I understand.”

~~~

The clouds that hang overhead are gray as Zuko makes his way towards the servants’ quarters. It is unheard of for any royal to ever set foot on these grounds, and so all eyes watch the Prince curiously as he approaches your humble home and knocks gently on the door. Movement sounds from the other side, and after a moment he is met with the startled face of your mother. It’s clear that she hadn’t been expecting him, and he takes her by surprise when he bows to the woman in respect.

“I apologize for coming unannounced, but I was hoping I could speak to y/n,” he utters with a look of defeat on his face. His sullen features make his lack of sleep obvious, and his eyes are full of desperation. You’ve been avoiding him for weeks and he has no clue as to why, but he hopes to figure it out soon before he starts to spiral any further.

“She’s…” your mother begins to say, glancing unsurely behind her before looking back to him, “she’s not feeling well. You can come back another time.”

“But-“

“Please, Prince Zuko, we can’t risk you catching whatever it is she’s come down with. You must go.”

She gives him no time to argue before slamming the door in his face. Zuko is stunned, but his shock quickly turns to anger as he lets out a frustrated breath of flames from his mouth before stalking off to cool himself down.

His footsteps fade into the distance as he departs, and you can only sit by the window of your room and watch him walk away. There’s a tightness in your chest that makes you feel as if you can’t breathe, and once he finally disappears over the horizon you break down into an inconsolable mess.

You love Zuko with all of your heart, so it kills you to act as if he means nothing to you. You’re trying to do what Ozai has demanded of you, but it’s agonizing and difficult. You’re too much of a coward to face him and break it off for good, so you’ve resorted to avidly avoiding the Prince at all costs. You hope that by pushing him away he’ll take it upon himself to end the relationship; it would be much less painful that way, but he’s too stubborn for his own good, and he’s persisted despite your best efforts.

The days seem to blend together as you lock yourself in your room while your mother continues to turn Zuko away. You haven’t done any of your chores or worked in days, but Ozai has not faulted you for your incompletion of tasks. Breaking Zuko’s heart is your task, and so long as you keep your word he couldn’t care less what you did with yourself.

After another week has passed, suffocation finally catches up to you and you’re forced to leave your room in order to get some fresh air. You sneak out at nightfall when the palace is quiet and your mother is sleeping so that no one can detect your presence. You retreat to the well out in the back and stare contemplatively into the water below. Clutching the sun that hangs from the gold chain around your neck, you admire the moon’s reflection in the ripples and wish you could be anywhere else but here in the Fire Nation.

“I thought I’d find you here,” a voice utters quietly, causing you to jump in alarm at the intrusion. You turn to meet the solemn gaze of the Prince, and as your back hits the cool stones of the well you find that you are cornered. You can’t avoid him now, and it’s a fact both of you are aware of.

“Zuko, I… I was just leaving,” you stammer hurriedly as you try to push your way past him, but he catches you by the arm before you can get away.

“No, not until you talk to me!” He demands, his eyes full of desperation and despair. “You’re supposed to be my girlfriend, yet you keep avoiding me. Why? Was it something I did?”

“No, Zuko, you didn’t do anything,” you insist despite refusing to meet his gaze. You’re terrified that someone will see you both together and alert Ozai, and you wish he would just release you so you could go back to hiding away in your room.

“Then why won’t you even look at me?”

Slowly, you peek your head up to meet his exasperated face. It seems he’s not going to give up without a fight, so you’re going to have to resort to doing what you’ve been trying to avoid this entire time.

“I don’t love you.”

“W-What?” Zuko stammers in quiet surprise, his hold on your arm loosening slightly. He doesn’t believe what he’s hearing from you, and his mind is scrambling to process your words.

“I don’t love you. I want nothing to do with you,” you repeat firmly, your eyes hardening as you stare up at him and yank yourself free from his grasp.

“Y/n, you don’t mean that-“

“I do mean it! I feel nothing for you, Zuko. I never have. I just felt like I couldn’t say no to you because you’re the Prince, so I had no choice but to say yes to being your girlfriend.”

Hurt flashes across his features and you’re dying inside at having to be so cruel to him. The heart of your childhood best friend is in your hands and you crush it with every word despite how much it pains you. But it’s better for both of you this way, it must be. Ozai will never let you be happy together, but apart he still has a chance to capture the promised future ahead of him. You’re doing him a favor, and you hope one day he’ll be able to see it that way too.

“I don’t understand,” he murmurs weakly, tears beginning to well in his eyes. Then, with frustration clear in his tone, “This doesn’t make any sense!”

“Did you honestly think we could actually be together?” You retort in disbelief. “Azula always said you were a fool, but I didn’t think you were this naive. A servant and a Prince don’t belong together, and you’re the only one who can’t seem to get that!”

“Alright, fine,” Zuko mutters indignantly. His sadness has quickly morphed into anger, and you hate the way it makes you feel. “Can I just ask you one thing?”

You say nothing in response, and he takes your silence as a sign to continue.

“If you don’t love me, then why are you still wearing the necklace?”

Your eyes widen slightly as your hand immediately flies to your neck to clutch the pendant, and your heart slowly begins to sink to your stomach as you realize you’ve been caught in your lie. It’s your turn now to be at a loss for words, unsure what to say as you simply stare up at him with your mouth slight agape.

“You don’t mean what you’re saying,” Zuko says firmly as he moves closer to you. “Someone else is speaking for you, aren’t they?”

“I…”

“What’s going on, y/n?” He presses gently, carefully resting a hand upon your cheek. “Why are you acting this way?”

“I can’t tell you,” you argue weakly, your own eyes becoming full of tears as you allow yourself to melt into his touch. You’ve missed the feeling of his warmth and the comfort of his closeness, and despite your mind screaming at you to remove yourself from him your heart keeps you planted in place.

“That’s nonsense, of course you can. You’ve always been able to tell me anything, so why can’t you now?”

“Can’t you just believe me when I tell you it’s for your own good?” You plead emphatically despite the wavering of your voice.

“How can this possibly be for my own good?!” He retorts in exasperation. “I’ve been miserable without you. Life feels empty when you aren’t around, and I don’t know how to deal with the fact that the girl I’ve loved all my life can’t seem to stand me.”

“It’s not like that!” You cry defensively as the tears finally begin to fall.

“Then what is it?!” Zuko demands, and you can’t seem to take any more of this torture. The lies are killing you, and you can’t help but to finally crack under pressure.

“I’m not good enough for you!” You finally exclaim as you pull yourself away from his touch. You try to choke back your sobs but the ache in your chest makes the task difficult, and you can do nothing but let your words flow freely after keeping them bottled in for weeks. “I-I have nothing to offer you, nothing that makes me special, nothing ahead of me like you do. It’s an embarrassment to the Fire Lord for you to be with me, and it will be an embarrassment for you to have me as your Fire Lady.”

Stunned by your admission, it takes Zuko a moment to process your words. He steps towards you and you flinch, effectively breaking his heart in the process. It’s clear you’re frightened, but not of him. Your fear is geared toward someone else, and the culprit must be responsible for you now feeling this way.

“Who told you such nonsense?”

“Your father,” you admit quietly much to Zuko’s dismay. His eyes immediately harden and his chest is immediately tight with anger, but he does his best to keep his emotions at bay so as to not upset you further. “He spoke to me when we returned from Ember Island and told me we couldn’t be together. Ozai demanded I break your heart so that you can move on and find another girl more suited for this life than I could ever be. I didn’t want to, I still don’t want to, but I’m doing this so that you can have a better future. I’ll only hold you back, Zuko.”

After taking a moment to digest your words, Zuko carefully steps towards you again. You don’t reject his advances this time, so he allows himself the opportunity to carefully wipe away the steady tears that fall down your cool cheeks. Despite how much of a mess you assume you must look like, the Prince still sees you as the most beautiful girl he’s ever laid eyes on.

“I don’t care what my father says,” he assures you gently as he takes your hands in his own. “You’re not an embarrassment, and there’s no other girl that could ever compare to you. I love you, y/n, and I’m not going to let anyone ever get in the way of that.”

“You mean that?” You ask with a quiet sniffle, holding his hands tight as if he’ll leave if you let go.

“Every word. Let my father and anyone else who disapproves of our relationship say what they want to say. I want to be with you, and I hope you still want to be with me too.”

His looks to you with pleading eyes that seek your reassurance, and for a moment you hesitate. Being with Zuko is all you’ve ever wanted, and now he stands here before you professing his loyalty and his love to you. The boy from your childhood had stolen your heart, and you’d be lying if you said you wanted it back.

You know being with him won’t be easy, especially not with his father’s adamant disapproval of your relationship, but you trust Zuko, and so you have to trust that everything will turn out okay. You meet his desperate gaze and gift him a faint smile, and despite knowing you’ll regret this, you wordlessly lean in to meet his lips in a kiss.

You can worry about Ozai’s wrath later. But for now, you allow yourself to melt into his embrace by the moonlit well as you share your first kiss in weeks. It feels right being in his arms once more after spending so much time apart, and you hope you’ll never have to be without his touch ever again.

| zuko tags: @ilovespideyyy @yiyibetch @eridanuswave @lammello @a-monsters-love @taeeemin @livelaughlovekuni @lovialy @alexatiu

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Information That Will Turn Your Life Around!

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Information That Will Turn Your Life Around!

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Everything Works Until It Doesn’t: How to Flow with Change

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"You're reading Everything Works Until It Doesn’t: How to Flow with Change, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you're enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

There comes a time in everyone's lives when things that you once used to rely on don't become as effective anymore.

You sort of outgrow the training wheels. The job you started out fresh and new doesn't challenge you anymore. The friends you had in college don't vibe with you any longer. The books you read don't give you any more new knowledge. You and your girlfriend have grown apart and you don't “click” like you should. This is what I call “things work…until they don't”. Everything's peachy until it isn't. The Myth of Forever Many years ago in the Western World (or America at least), people used to work for one employer their entire lives and live in one place their entire lives. You could expect to retire with a nice employer matched pension and for things to “just make sense”. This was the “American Dream”. This stability was a glossy sheen over the inherent chaos and turbulence that is life and nature. Nothing in nature stands still, everything is constant change. You, as a creation of nature are the same way. Things will (and must) change in your life. Dealing with this change is the key to unlocking new levels of meaning and nuance in your life. When people aren't able to accept change, they get tossed around like a leaf in the wind – unable to deal with calamity and chaos. Then, fear sets in. Then, hesitation. Then no action. Knowing When It's Time to Move On What are the consequences of not being able to “go with the flow”? Well, you get stuck. You specifically get stuck in situations you absolutely do not want to be in. I know this because this happened to me. I got hired for a job right after college. The job paid a nice salary for someone just out of college and I was learning lots of new things. About a year in, I stopped learning as much. I didn't get a raise because the company wasn't doing too well. It became unnecessarily monotonous. I had outgrown the position. I justified sticking it out because I was optimistic that things were going to get better, but I stayed another year. At the end of the day, I was getting paid, right? Well, came to an abrupt close. I got laid off 2 years after I started. Everything worked out in the end, but I could have prevented this by being willing to jump off an obviously sinking ship. The consequences of not moving on could be even more drastic in certain situations. You need the willingness, the discernment, the decisiveness to cut your losses and just move on. Moving on From Certain Ideas You not only have to move on from certain situations, but you also have to leave old modes of thought behind. Things you once cherished as absolute truth are now seen as half-truths or downright lies. These may be beliefs you have about yourself, about others, about the world, etc, that are holding you back from achievement in a certain area. You will only rise to the height of your belief system, also known as your paradigm. If you want to achieve success and especially earth-shattering, skyscraper type success, you have to leave old patterns and ideas behind. What are some examples?:

Believing you don't have the skills to change into a new line of work Believing that you don't have what it takes to attract the partner of your dreams Believing that the world is absolutes and black and white Believing that you need to work a 9-5 salaried job to make it in this world Believing that college is necessary.

The list goes on and on. These beliefs served you well at one time by helping keep you comfortable, but now those same beliefs have become very uncomfortable. Pulling the Plug Even When You're Scared There are times when you just know in your deepest heart of hearts that it's time for you to move on, but you just can't. You feel paralyzed with doubt, fear, and indecision. Here's some tips on how you can move on with your life and get past analysis paralysis. 1. Think of the Worst-Case Scenario Things are worse in our mind than they are or will be in reality. This creates fear which paralyzes action, meaning you'll never find out what will actually happen if you can take action. The worst-case of every action is that you will die. We're all going to die anyway, so the worst-case scenario really isn't that bad. In the interim, you may experience some degree of pain, but you still have a chance to achieve whatever it is you want to achieve and get out of situations that simply aren't working. 2. Think of the Best-Case Scenario Imagine what will happen when you have the courage to move out of a certain situation into a better one. Imagine yourself in a better job, a better relationship, a better way of life — if you took action. What would happen? Like before, you will experience some degree of discomfort, but it's in the pursuit of a greater good. 3. Be Flexible and Accepting When you move out of situations that aren't helping you, there will be a rough adjustment period. Accept it as part of the process. Once you do, the better off you'll be in adopting the changes to your new lifestyle. 4. Understand it's necessary The final crux to everything is changing your worldview and how you view things is absolutely necessary at some point in time. You cannot stay the same forever. Having the willingness to change makes everything 10x easier.

Sim Campbell has made it his mission to examine what it means to live an expansive and fulfilling life in the modern world as an emerging young man. He talks about this on Unstoppable Rise, a site dedicated to relentless personal development with a strong philosophical slant. You've read Everything Works Until It Doesn’t: How to Flow with Change, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you've enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles." https://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/everything-works-until-it-doesnt-how-to-flow-with-change/

Don't be afraid to teach! Teaching others, whether it is teaching a child to tie their shoe or teaching a colleague at work to operate a new piece of complex machinery, is empowering. We don't have to be experts ourselves to be ready to lend a helping hand when someone needs it.

  You should get plenty of exercise. Over the years, studies have shown that exercise increases serotonin in the brain. This can make you a happier and more energetic person overall. It's also great for your body image and can make you think more positively about yourself, which is great for depression.

  Help others! Learn CPR and basic first aid skills through your local Fire Station or community center. By helping someone who is in danger or injured, you are also helping yourself. Helping someone will else give you a sense of pride, purpose, and inspiration. There's a chance you could even save another person's life, contributing to the fullness of your own life.

  If you are having difficulty coping with the effects of depression, you may find peace and guidance from joining a depression support group. Sometimes our friends and family members do not understand how depression can affect us; reaching out to a support group allows you to gain the support of people who are undergoing the same things that you are.

5 Simple Ways To Knock Out Stress

yourdost.com

"Stress. One of the most commonly used words in our everyday vocabulary. It almost feels natural to say, “I’m so stressed!” or “This is stressing me out!” since every one of us experiences varying levels of stress at different points in our lives. If you’re not sure how stressed you are, check out the 7 signs that …" http://yourdost.com/blog/2019/08/5-simple-ways-to-knock-out-stress.html

Keep a journal. When you embark on a journey towards personal development, make sure you record all of your thoughts, feelings, and ideas. Not only will it be a joy to look back on when you reach your goals, but it can be a useful tool if you find yourself going astray. You can look over your journal and find what led you to where you are and see exactly how to get back on track.

  To access your subconscious mind and find hidden solutions to your problems and questions, write in your journal each night before bed. Write about your day and ask yourself, in writing, how you might have improved problematic situations. Once you have written your questions, let them go. Your subconscious mind will unravel them overnight and may present you with an answer in the morning!

  For many people, retreating from a conflict is the standard response. Unfortunately, this habit does nothing to resolve the problem or prevent similar issues in the future. Try to practice keeping yourself in the conflict while continuing to engage the other party with questions that can help to resolve the problem. Unlike simply retreating and giving someone the famous "cold shoulder", this approach forces you to work through your concerns and avoid creating further resentment.

  Take half an hour and write out every good quality you feel you have. It's important to understand who you are as a person. What are your key characteristics that you feel you exude? You will want to increase the level at which you offer those good qualities to the world. By writing them out, you are essentially beginning an action plan for personal development.

Find Your Ideal Job and Build Your Dream Business

www.leadershipnow.com

"IS IT POSSIBLE  to have your cake and eat it too? If there was a way to find your ideal job and build your dream business, would you consider both? Most people see this dichotomy and feel that they need to choose one dream over the other. The reality is that you can have both dreams so long as each doesn’t harm the other and enhances your lifestyle. Having worked with more than 10,000 entrepreneurs, innovators, inventors, hobbyists and side hustlers, they often struggle with when it is appropriate to leap from the job environment into the entrepreneurship maze. The presumption is that one has to sacrifice entrepreneurial dreams in order to be successful at a specific career choice. The truth is that you can have both and I strongly encourage aspiring employee-preneurs to review the following five reasons to consider maintaining your job in the first few years of building your business. 1. Learning from Both Work Environments: When you work as an employee and have a side entrepreneurial business, you can learn from both environments and both environments can benefit from each other. Often the entrepreneurial pathway is a lonely pathway and sole-preneurs in particular find themselves trying to navigate, learn and network to gain knowledge while building their business. Realizing that you can gain education from both environments allows an opportunity for you to thrive as an employee and manage a successful side hustle. 2. Business Ownership Strengthens Your Employee Net Worth: In most positions you rarely get the opportunity to experience the functions associated with the roles of a Chief Executive Officer, Chief Financial Officer, and Chief Marketing Officer, as well as manage the day-to-day requirements for customer engagement and retention. As a result of limited job functions in a large corporate environment, it doesn’t give you the full breadth of work involved in successfully managing an enterprise. By exploring the entrepreneurship maze you will quickly immerse yourself in all these functions, which will give you a better picture of the business itself, as well as an appreciation for the company that employees you. 3. Position Yourself with a Better Financial Portfolio: Quitting your job and then applying for a small business loan is a recipe for disaster. Often lenders expect borrowers to be fully collateralized. Having a successful employment position strengthens your probability of obtaining a loan or line of credit. While there are a lot of targeted small business funds that don’t require full collateralization, obtaining funds from your financial institution will be challenging if your debt to equity ratio does not meet their criteria and you don’t have a secondary source of income they can secure against the loan. In addition, being employed allows you the flexibility of investing in your small business without the stress of adding more debt into your current financial portfolio. Having the availability to set aside a few hundred dollars each month towards your business is significant when you have to consider paying for licensing, website development, social media support, etc. 4. Don’t Put Your Financial Eggs in One Basket: Diversifying your income allows you to mitigate financial risk and maximize your ability to make more money. Most people rely on their employment position for sole source income and if that position is compromised they may have a difficult time replacing those funds in a short period of time. Creating other opportunities to generate more money provides an additional financial cushion for investments or as an emergency fund program.  The key is to target business concepts that don’t impose too much time on your part but produce a sizable financial return on your investment. Examples may include selling products online, starting a consulting business, or purchasing a semi-absentee franchise opportunity. 5. There Is No Need to Rush the Process: Most entrepreneurs believe they have to rush things to launch a company because they may lose out on the business opportunity. This may actually be a recipe for disaster. Rushing into a business concept without a proper feasibility review including competitive research, market analysis, and customer input is rushing to an unproven plan. Spending time building the foundation of the business allows for validation and a chance to identify the strengths, weakness, opportunities and threats of the proposed concept. Once the business has reached a certain consistent income you can decide whether to leap into the business full-time or hire others to manage the business. Ironically many of the Fortune 500 companies today began with entrepreneurs that started their business concept while working for an employer and then transitioned to their business slowly. Skin in the game does not mean you have to quit a job to explore a business. It means you have to be willing to invest time, money, or both in order to build your side hustle into a fledging small business operation. The great news is you don’t have to sacrifice either opportunity to benefit from both opportunities. You can have your cake and eat it too. * * * Kedma Ough is the author of Target Funding: A Proven System to Get the Money and Resources You Need to Start or Grow Your Business. One of today’s most respected authorities on small business funding and entrepreneurship, she is a nationally renowned business coach and funding expert and winner of the Small Business Administration (SBA) Small Business Champion of the Year Award.  As a small business consultant and educator, she has guided more than 10,000 individuals through a wide range of business advising and is a past contributing writer for Entrepreneur Magazine. When she is not running around as a live superhero, she enjoys time with her family and traveling the world. Ough is a proud fifth-generation entrepreneur. * * *   Like us on Instagram and Facebook for additional leadership and personal development ideas. * * *" https://www.leadershipnow.com/leadingblog/2019/08/find_your_ideal_job_and_build.htmlhttp://www.leadershipnow.com/cgi-bin/mt/mt-atom.cgi/weblog/blog_id=1/entry_id=1751

Look at the changes you will need to make on a daily basis and actions you need to take daily in order to reach your goals. Turn those actions into daily habits. Once you get used to doing the same action daily it will make your goals easier to reach over time.

  To healthily administer self help in regards to bipolar disorder, make sure that you establish a daily schedule and stick to it. This is important because it removes any stress that is caused by uncertainty in your life. Having a schedule will help to put your overall life in order.

  Do not dwell on your problems. Think about the solutions for them. If you are constantly thinking about all of the things that are wrong in your life you will not find any happiness. If you take the time to think about how to resolve those problems you will eliminate them altogether.

  You must be able to concentrate and focus if you plan on being successful in this life. No one can make it in this world by just talking and offering opinions all the time. You must be able to listen, and you must be able to take time to learn about new things in a concentrated manner.

  As you seek for a better tomorrow, the information here can assist you in making your dreams a reality. Holding onto your education, motivation and essential strategies help you make a concrete plan and stick to it; without such structure, moving forward may be more difficult than you can manage. By holding onto these strategies–and most importantly, to hope–you are setting your path toward a better, happier outlook.

[personalcoachingcenter]

Information That Will Turn Your Life Around!

New Post has been published on http://personalcoachingcenter.com/information-that-will-turn-your-life-around/

Information That Will Turn Your Life Around!

Below is an array of effective strategies as you begin your journey toward personal development, greater happiness, decreased stress and increased motivation. Here, you will find a discussion of personal development and some of the pitfalls that accompany it. By following the tips, you can learn the best path to a better you.

  Try keeping your task manager with you at all times. This can be in the form of a list on a piece of paper, a memo on a phone, or even a list you have online. Wherever you are working, try to keep it within sight or within reach to help you get your tasks done.

    Take time to think about what you want from life. Too often we get rushed into a path that we are really not interested in taking. For some people this might involve a parent pushing them into the family business. For others it might be peer pressure to drop out of school. Only you know what you really want.

  If things get to a place where you cannot handle them, seek help from someone like a therapist. They can help you to cope with your issues by talking them out and coming up with some solutions. It can do you a lot of good to talk to somebody who is not directly involved in your life; it can provide you with a clear perspective.

Everything Works Until It Doesn’t: How to Flow with Change

www.pickthebrain.com

"You're reading Everything Works Until It Doesn’t: How to Flow with Change, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you're enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

There comes a time in everyone's lives when things that you once used to rely on don't become as effective anymore.

You sort of outgrow the training wheels. The job you started out fresh and new doesn't challenge you anymore. The friends you had in college don't vibe with you any longer. The books you read don't give you any more new knowledge. You and your girlfriend have grown apart and you don't “click” like you should. This is what I call “things work…until they don't”. Everything's peachy until it isn't. The Myth of Forever Many years ago in the Western World (or America at least), people used to work for one employer their entire lives and live in one place their entire lives. You could expect to retire with a nice employer matched pension and for things to “just make sense”. This was the “American Dream”. This stability was a glossy sheen over the inherent chaos and turbulence that is life and nature. Nothing in nature stands still, everything is constant change. You, as a creation of nature are the same way. Things will (and must) change in your life. Dealing with this change is the key to unlocking new levels of meaning and nuance in your life. When people aren't able to accept change, they get tossed around like a leaf in the wind – unable to deal with calamity and chaos. Then, fear sets in. Then, hesitation. Then no action. Knowing When It's Time to Move On What are the consequences of not being able to “go with the flow”? Well, you get stuck. You specifically get stuck in situations you absolutely do not want to be in. I know this because this happened to me. I got hired for a job right after college. The job paid a nice salary for someone just out of college and I was learning lots of new things. About a year in, I stopped learning as much. I didn't get a raise because the company wasn't doing too well. It became unnecessarily monotonous. I had outgrown the position. I justified sticking it out because I was optimistic that things were going to get better, but I stayed another year. At the end of the day, I was getting paid, right? Well, came to an abrupt close. I got laid off 2 years after I started. Everything worked out in the end, but I could have prevented this by being willing to jump off an obviously sinking ship. The consequences of not moving on could be even more drastic in certain situations. You need the willingness, the discernment, the decisiveness to cut your losses and just move on. Moving on From Certain Ideas You not only have to move on from certain situations, but you also have to leave old modes of thought behind. Things you once cherished as absolute truth are now seen as half-truths or downright lies. These may be beliefs you have about yourself, about others, about the world, etc, that are holding you back from achievement in a certain area. You will only rise to the height of your belief system, also known as your paradigm. If you want to achieve success and especially earth-shattering, skyscraper type success, you have to leave old patterns and ideas behind. What are some examples?:

Believing you don't have the skills to change into a new line of work Believing that you don't have what it takes to attract the partner of your dreams Believing that the world is absolutes and black and white Believing that you need to work a 9-5 salaried job to make it in this world Believing that college is necessary.

The list goes on and on. These beliefs served you well at one time by helping keep you comfortable, but now those same beliefs have become very uncomfortable. Pulling the Plug Even When You're Scared There are times when you just know in your deepest heart of hearts that it's time for you to move on, but you just can't. You feel paralyzed with doubt, fear, and indecision. Here's some tips on how you can move on with your life and get past analysis paralysis. 1. Think of the Worst-Case Scenario Things are worse in our mind than they are or will be in reality. This creates fear which paralyzes action, meaning you'll never find out what will actually happen if you can take action. The worst-case of every action is that you will die. We're all going to die anyway, so the worst-case scenario really isn't that bad. In the interim, you may experience some degree of pain, but you still have a chance to achieve whatever it is you want to achieve and get out of situations that simply aren't working. 2. Think of the Best-Case Scenario Imagine what will happen when you have the courage to move out of a certain situation into a better one. Imagine yourself in a better job, a better relationship, a better way of life — if you took action. What would happen? Like before, you will experience some degree of discomfort, but it's in the pursuit of a greater good. 3. Be Flexible and Accepting When you move out of situations that aren't helping you, there will be a rough adjustment period. Accept it as part of the process. Once you do, the better off you'll be in adopting the changes to your new lifestyle. 4. Understand it's necessary The final crux to everything is changing your worldview and how you view things is absolutely necessary at some point in time. You cannot stay the same forever. Having the willingness to change makes everything 10x easier.

Sim Campbell has made it his mission to examine what it means to live an expansive and fulfilling life in the modern world as an emerging young man. He talks about this on Unstoppable Rise, a site dedicated to relentless personal development with a strong philosophical slant. You've read Everything Works Until It Doesn’t: How to Flow with Change, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you've enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles." https://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/everything-works-until-it-doesnt-how-to-flow-with-change/

Don't be afraid to teach! Teaching others, whether it is teaching a child to tie their shoe or teaching a colleague at work to operate a new piece of complex machinery, is empowering. We don't have to be experts ourselves to be ready to lend a helping hand when someone needs it.

  You should get plenty of exercise. Over the years, studies have shown that exercise increases serotonin in the brain. This can make you a happier and more energetic person overall. It's also great for your body image and can make you think more positively about yourself, which is great for depression.

  Help others! Learn CPR and basic first aid skills through your local Fire Station or community center. By helping someone who is in danger or injured, you are also helping yourself. Helping someone will else give you a sense of pride, purpose, and inspiration. There's a chance you could even save another person's life, contributing to the fullness of your own life.

  If you are having difficulty coping with the effects of depression, you may find peace and guidance from joining a depression support group. Sometimes our friends and family members do not understand how depression can affect us; reaching out to a support group allows you to gain the support of people who are undergoing the same things that you are.

5 Simple Ways To Knock Out Stress

yourdost.com

"Stress. One of the most commonly used words in our everyday vocabulary. It almost feels natural to say, “I’m so stressed!” or “This is stressing me out!” since every one of us experiences varying levels of stress at different points in our lives. If you’re not sure how stressed you are, check out the 7 signs that …" http://yourdost.com/blog/2019/08/5-simple-ways-to-knock-out-stress.html

Keep a journal. When you embark on a journey towards personal development, make sure you record all of your thoughts, feelings, and ideas. Not only will it be a joy to look back on when you reach your goals, but it can be a useful tool if you find yourself going astray. You can look over your journal and find what led you to where you are and see exactly how to get back on track.

  To access your subconscious mind and find hidden solutions to your problems and questions, write in your journal each night before bed. Write about your day and ask yourself, in writing, how you might have improved problematic situations. Once you have written your questions, let them go. Your subconscious mind will unravel them overnight and may present you with an answer in the morning!

  For many people, retreating from a conflict is the standard response. Unfortunately, this habit does nothing to resolve the problem or prevent similar issues in the future. Try to practice keeping yourself in the conflict while continuing to engage the other party with questions that can help to resolve the problem. Unlike simply retreating and giving someone the famous "cold shoulder", this approach forces you to work through your concerns and avoid creating further resentment.

  Take half an hour and write out every good quality you feel you have. It's important to understand who you are as a person. What are your key characteristics that you feel you exude? You will want to increase the level at which you offer those good qualities to the world. By writing them out, you are essentially beginning an action plan for personal development.

Find Your Ideal Job and Build Your Dream Business

www.leadershipnow.com

"IS IT POSSIBLE  to have your cake and eat it too? If there was a way to find your ideal job and build your dream business, would you consider both? Most people see this dichotomy and feel that they need to choose one dream over the other. The reality is that you can have both dreams so long as each doesn’t harm the other and enhances your lifestyle. Having worked with more than 10,000 entrepreneurs, innovators, inventors, hobbyists and side hustlers, they often struggle with when it is appropriate to leap from the job environment into the entrepreneurship maze. The presumption is that one has to sacrifice entrepreneurial dreams in order to be successful at a specific career choice. The truth is that you can have both and I strongly encourage aspiring employee-preneurs to review the following five reasons to consider maintaining your job in the first few years of building your business. 1. Learning from Both Work Environments: When you work as an employee and have a side entrepreneurial business, you can learn from both environments and both environments can benefit from each other. Often the entrepreneurial pathway is a lonely pathway and sole-preneurs in particular find themselves trying to navigate, learn and network to gain knowledge while building their business. Realizing that you can gain education from both environments allows an opportunity for you to thrive as an employee and manage a successful side hustle. 2. Business Ownership Strengthens Your Employee Net Worth: In most positions you rarely get the opportunity to experience the functions associated with the roles of a Chief Executive Officer, Chief Financial Officer, and Chief Marketing Officer, as well as manage the day-to-day requirements for customer engagement and retention. As a result of limited job functions in a large corporate environment, it doesn’t give you the full breadth of work involved in successfully managing an enterprise. By exploring the entrepreneurship maze you will quickly immerse yourself in all these functions, which will give you a better picture of the business itself, as well as an appreciation for the company that employees you. 3. Position Yourself with a Better Financial Portfolio: Quitting your job and then applying for a small business loan is a recipe for disaster. Often lenders expect borrowers to be fully collateralized. Having a successful employment position strengthens your probability of obtaining a loan or line of credit. While there are a lot of targeted small business funds that don’t require full collateralization, obtaining funds from your financial institution will be challenging if your debt to equity ratio does not meet their criteria and you don’t have a secondary source of income they can secure against the loan. In addition, being employed allows you the flexibility of investing in your small business without the stress of adding more debt into your current financial portfolio. Having the availability to set aside a few hundred dollars each month towards your business is significant when you have to consider paying for licensing, website development, social media support, etc. 4. Don’t Put Your Financial Eggs in One Basket: Diversifying your income allows you to mitigate financial risk and maximize your ability to make more money. Most people rely on their employment position for sole source income and if that position is compromised they may have a difficult time replacing those funds in a short period of time. Creating other opportunities to generate more money provides an additional financial cushion for investments or as an emergency fund program.  The key is to target business concepts that don’t impose too much time on your part but produce a sizable financial return on your investment. Examples may include selling products online, starting a consulting business, or purchasing a semi-absentee franchise opportunity. 5. There Is No Need to Rush the Process: Most entrepreneurs believe they have to rush things to launch a company because they may lose out on the business opportunity. This may actually be a recipe for disaster. Rushing into a business concept without a proper feasibility review including competitive research, market analysis, and customer input is rushing to an unproven plan. Spending time building the foundation of the business allows for validation and a chance to identify the strengths, weakness, opportunities and threats of the proposed concept. Once the business has reached a certain consistent income you can decide whether to leap into the business full-time or hire others to manage the business. Ironically many of the Fortune 500 companies today began with entrepreneurs that started their business concept while working for an employer and then transitioned to their business slowly. Skin in the game does not mean you have to quit a job to explore a business. It means you have to be willing to invest time, money, or both in order to build your side hustle into a fledging small business operation. The great news is you don’t have to sacrifice either opportunity to benefit from both opportunities. You can have your cake and eat it too. * * * Kedma Ough is the author of Target Funding: A Proven System to Get the Money and Resources You Need to Start or Grow Your Business. One of today’s most respected authorities on small business funding and entrepreneurship, she is a nationally renowned business coach and funding expert and winner of the Small Business Administration (SBA) Small Business Champion of the Year Award.  As a small business consultant and educator, she has guided more than 10,000 individuals through a wide range of business advising and is a past contributing writer for Entrepreneur Magazine. When she is not running around as a live superhero, she enjoys time with her family and traveling the world. Ough is a proud fifth-generation entrepreneur. * * *   Like us on Instagram and Facebook for additional leadership and personal development ideas. * * *" https://www.leadershipnow.com/leadingblog/2019/08/find_your_ideal_job_and_build.htmlhttp://www.leadershipnow.com/cgi-bin/mt/mt-atom.cgi/weblog/blog_id=1/entry_id=1751

Look at the changes you will need to make on a daily basis and actions you need to take daily in order to reach your goals. Turn those actions into daily habits. Once you get used to doing the same action daily it will make your goals easier to reach over time.

  To healthily administer self help in regards to bipolar disorder, make sure that you establish a daily schedule and stick to it. This is important because it removes any stress that is caused by uncertainty in your life. Having a schedule will help to put your overall life in order.

  Do not dwell on your problems. Think about the solutions for them. If you are constantly thinking about all of the things that are wrong in your life you will not find any happiness. If you take the time to think about how to resolve those problems you will eliminate them altogether.

  You must be able to concentrate and focus if you plan on being successful in this life. No one can make it in this world by just talking and offering opinions all the time. You must be able to listen, and you must be able to take time to learn about new things in a concentrated manner.

  As you seek for a better tomorrow, the information here can assist you in making your dreams a reality. Holding onto your education, motivation and essential strategies help you make a concrete plan and stick to it; without such structure, moving forward may be more difficult than you can manage. By holding onto these strategies–and most importantly, to hope–you are setting your path toward a better, happier outlook.

[personalcoachingcenter]

Information That Will Turn Your Life Around!

New Post has been published on https://personalcoachingcenter.com/information-that-will-turn-your-life-around/

Information That Will Turn Your Life Around!

Below is an array of effective strategies as you begin your journey toward personal development, greater happiness, decreased stress and increased motivation. Here, you will find a discussion of personal development and some of the pitfalls that accompany it. By following the tips, you can learn the best path to a better you.

  Try keeping your task manager with you at all times. This can be in the form of a list on a piece of paper, a memo on a phone, or even a list you have online. Wherever you are working, try to keep it within sight or within reach to help you get your tasks done.

    Take time to think about what you want from life. Too often we get rushed into a path that we are really not interested in taking. For some people this might involve a parent pushing them into the family business. For others it might be peer pressure to drop out of school. Only you know what you really want.

  If things get to a place where you cannot handle them, seek help from someone like a therapist. They can help you to cope with your issues by talking them out and coming up with some solutions. It can do you a lot of good to talk to somebody who is not directly involved in your life; it can provide you with a clear perspective.

Everything Works Until It Doesn’t: How to Flow with Change

www.pickthebrain.com

"You're reading Everything Works Until It Doesn’t: How to Flow with Change, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you're enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

There comes a time in everyone's lives when things that you once used to rely on don't become as effective anymore.

You sort of outgrow the training wheels. The job you started out fresh and new doesn't challenge you anymore. The friends you had in college don't vibe with you any longer. The books you read don't give you any more new knowledge. You and your girlfriend have grown apart and you don't “click” like you should. This is what I call “things work…until they don't”. Everything's peachy until it isn't. The Myth of Forever Many years ago in the Western World (or America at least), people used to work for one employer their entire lives and live in one place their entire lives. You could expect to retire with a nice employer matched pension and for things to “just make sense”. This was the “American Dream”. This stability was a glossy sheen over the inherent chaos and turbulence that is life and nature. Nothing in nature stands still, everything is constant change. You, as a creation of nature are the same way. Things will (and must) change in your life. Dealing with this change is the key to unlocking new levels of meaning and nuance in your life. When people aren't able to accept change, they get tossed around like a leaf in the wind – unable to deal with calamity and chaos. Then, fear sets in. Then, hesitation. Then no action. Knowing When It's Time to Move On What are the consequences of not being able to “go with the flow”? Well, you get stuck. You specifically get stuck in situations you absolutely do not want to be in. I know this because this happened to me. I got hired for a job right after college. The job paid a nice salary for someone just out of college and I was learning lots of new things. About a year in, I stopped learning as much. I didn't get a raise because the company wasn't doing too well. It became unnecessarily monotonous. I had outgrown the position. I justified sticking it out because I was optimistic that things were going to get better, but I stayed another year. At the end of the day, I was getting paid, right? Well, came to an abrupt close. I got laid off 2 years after I started. Everything worked out in the end, but I could have prevented this by being willing to jump off an obviously sinking ship. The consequences of not moving on could be even more drastic in certain situations. You need the willingness, the discernment, the decisiveness to cut your losses and just move on. Moving on From Certain Ideas You not only have to move on from certain situations, but you also have to leave old modes of thought behind. Things you once cherished as absolute truth are now seen as half-truths or downright lies. These may be beliefs you have about yourself, about others, about the world, etc, that are holding you back from achievement in a certain area. You will only rise to the height of your belief system, also known as your paradigm. If you want to achieve success and especially earth-shattering, skyscraper type success, you have to leave old patterns and ideas behind. What are some examples?:

Believing you don't have the skills to change into a new line of work Believing that you don't have what it takes to attract the partner of your dreams Believing that the world is absolutes and black and white Believing that you need to work a 9-5 salaried job to make it in this world Believing that college is necessary.

The list goes on and on. These beliefs served you well at one time by helping keep you comfortable, but now those same beliefs have become very uncomfortable. Pulling the Plug Even When You're Scared There are times when you just know in your deepest heart of hearts that it's time for you to move on, but you just can't. You feel paralyzed with doubt, fear, and indecision. Here's some tips on how you can move on with your life and get past analysis paralysis. 1. Think of the Worst-Case Scenario Things are worse in our mind than they are or will be in reality. This creates fear which paralyzes action, meaning you'll never find out what will actually happen if you can take action. The worst-case of every action is that you will die. We're all going to die anyway, so the worst-case scenario really isn't that bad. In the interim, you may experience some degree of pain, but you still have a chance to achieve whatever it is you want to achieve and get out of situations that simply aren't working. 2. Think of the Best-Case Scenario Imagine what will happen when you have the courage to move out of a certain situation into a better one. Imagine yourself in a better job, a better relationship, a better way of life — if you took action. What would happen? Like before, you will experience some degree of discomfort, but it's in the pursuit of a greater good. 3. Be Flexible and Accepting When you move out of situations that aren't helping you, there will be a rough adjustment period. Accept it as part of the process. Once you do, the better off you'll be in adopting the changes to your new lifestyle. 4. Understand it's necessary The final crux to everything is changing your worldview and how you view things is absolutely necessary at some point in time. You cannot stay the same forever. Having the willingness to change makes everything 10x easier.

Sim Campbell has made it his mission to examine what it means to live an expansive and fulfilling life in the modern world as an emerging young man. He talks about this on Unstoppable Rise, a site dedicated to relentless personal development with a strong philosophical slant. You've read Everything Works Until It Doesn’t: How to Flow with Change, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you've enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles." https://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/everything-works-until-it-doesnt-how-to-flow-with-change/

Don't be afraid to teach! Teaching others, whether it is teaching a child to tie their shoe or teaching a colleague at work to operate a new piece of complex machinery, is empowering. We don't have to be experts ourselves to be ready to lend a helping hand when someone needs it.

  You should get plenty of exercise. Over the years, studies have shown that exercise increases serotonin in the brain. This can make you a happier and more energetic person overall. It's also great for your body image and can make you think more positively about yourself, which is great for depression.

  Help others! Learn CPR and basic first aid skills through your local Fire Station or community center. By helping someone who is in danger or injured, you are also helping yourself. Helping someone will else give you a sense of pride, purpose, and inspiration. There's a chance you could even save another person's life, contributing to the fullness of your own life.

  If you are having difficulty coping with the effects of depression, you may find peace and guidance from joining a depression support group. Sometimes our friends and family members do not understand how depression can affect us; reaching out to a support group allows you to gain the support of people who are undergoing the same things that you are.

5 Simple Ways To Knock Out Stress

yourdost.com

"Stress. One of the most commonly used words in our everyday vocabulary. It almost feels natural to say, “I’m so stressed!” or “This is stressing me out!” since every one of us experiences varying levels of stress at different points in our lives. If you’re not sure how stressed you are, check out the 7 signs that …" http://yourdost.com/blog/2019/08/5-simple-ways-to-knock-out-stress.html

Keep a journal. When you embark on a journey towards personal development, make sure you record all of your thoughts, feelings, and ideas. Not only will it be a joy to look back on when you reach your goals, but it can be a useful tool if you find yourself going astray. You can look over your journal and find what led you to where you are and see exactly how to get back on track.

  To access your subconscious mind and find hidden solutions to your problems and questions, write in your journal each night before bed. Write about your day and ask yourself, in writing, how you might have improved problematic situations. Once you have written your questions, let them go. Your subconscious mind will unravel them overnight and may present you with an answer in the morning!

  For many people, retreating from a conflict is the standard response. Unfortunately, this habit does nothing to resolve the problem or prevent similar issues in the future. Try to practice keeping yourself in the conflict while continuing to engage the other party with questions that can help to resolve the problem. Unlike simply retreating and giving someone the famous "cold shoulder", this approach forces you to work through your concerns and avoid creating further resentment.

  Take half an hour and write out every good quality you feel you have. It's important to understand who you are as a person. What are your key characteristics that you feel you exude? You will want to increase the level at which you offer those good qualities to the world. By writing them out, you are essentially beginning an action plan for personal development.

Find Your Ideal Job and Build Your Dream Business

www.leadershipnow.com

"IS IT POSSIBLE  to have your cake and eat it too? If there was a way to find your ideal job and build your dream business, would you consider both? Most people see this dichotomy and feel that they need to choose one dream over the other. The reality is that you can have both dreams so long as each doesn’t harm the other and enhances your lifestyle. Having worked with more than 10,000 entrepreneurs, innovators, inventors, hobbyists and side hustlers, they often struggle with when it is appropriate to leap from the job environment into the entrepreneurship maze. The presumption is that one has to sacrifice entrepreneurial dreams in order to be successful at a specific career choice. The truth is that you can have both and I strongly encourage aspiring employee-preneurs to review the following five reasons to consider maintaining your job in the first few years of building your business. 1. Learning from Both Work Environments: When you work as an employee and have a side entrepreneurial business, you can learn from both environments and both environments can benefit from each other. Often the entrepreneurial pathway is a lonely pathway and sole-preneurs in particular find themselves trying to navigate, learn and network to gain knowledge while building their business. Realizing that you can gain education from both environments allows an opportunity for you to thrive as an employee and manage a successful side hustle. 2. Business Ownership Strengthens Your Employee Net Worth: In most positions you rarely get the opportunity to experience the functions associated with the roles of a Chief Executive Officer, Chief Financial Officer, and Chief Marketing Officer, as well as manage the day-to-day requirements for customer engagement and retention. As a result of limited job functions in a large corporate environment, it doesn’t give you the full breadth of work involved in successfully managing an enterprise. By exploring the entrepreneurship maze you will quickly immerse yourself in all these functions, which will give you a better picture of the business itself, as well as an appreciation for the company that employees you. 3. Position Yourself with a Better Financial Portfolio: Quitting your job and then applying for a small business loan is a recipe for disaster. Often lenders expect borrowers to be fully collateralized. Having a successful employment position strengthens your probability of obtaining a loan or line of credit. While there are a lot of targeted small business funds that don’t require full collateralization, obtaining funds from your financial institution will be challenging if your debt to equity ratio does not meet their criteria and you don’t have a secondary source of income they can secure against the loan. In addition, being employed allows you the flexibility of investing in your small business without the stress of adding more debt into your current financial portfolio. Having the availability to set aside a few hundred dollars each month towards your business is significant when you have to consider paying for licensing, website development, social media support, etc. 4. Don’t Put Your Financial Eggs in One Basket: Diversifying your income allows you to mitigate financial risk and maximize your ability to make more money. Most people rely on their employment position for sole source income and if that position is compromised they may have a difficult time replacing those funds in a short period of time. Creating other opportunities to generate more money provides an additional financial cushion for investments or as an emergency fund program.  The key is to target business concepts that don’t impose too much time on your part but produce a sizable financial return on your investment. Examples may include selling products online, starting a consulting business, or purchasing a semi-absentee franchise opportunity. 5. There Is No Need to Rush the Process: Most entrepreneurs believe they have to rush things to launch a company because they may lose out on the business opportunity. This may actually be a recipe for disaster. Rushing into a business concept without a proper feasibility review including competitive research, market analysis, and customer input is rushing to an unproven plan. Spending time building the foundation of the business allows for validation and a chance to identify the strengths, weakness, opportunities and threats of the proposed concept. Once the business has reached a certain consistent income you can decide whether to leap into the business full-time or hire others to manage the business. Ironically many of the Fortune 500 companies today began with entrepreneurs that started their business concept while working for an employer and then transitioned to their business slowly. Skin in the game does not mean you have to quit a job to explore a business. It means you have to be willing to invest time, money, or both in order to build your side hustle into a fledging small business operation. The great news is you don’t have to sacrifice either opportunity to benefit from both opportunities. You can have your cake and eat it too. * * * Kedma Ough is the author of Target Funding: A Proven System to Get the Money and Resources You Need to Start or Grow Your Business. One of today’s most respected authorities on small business funding and entrepreneurship, she is a nationally renowned business coach and funding expert and winner of the Small Business Administration (SBA) Small Business Champion of the Year Award.  As a small business consultant and educator, she has guided more than 10,000 individuals through a wide range of business advising and is a past contributing writer for Entrepreneur Magazine. When she is not running around as a live superhero, she enjoys time with her family and traveling the world. Ough is a proud fifth-generation entrepreneur. * * *   Like us on Instagram and Facebook for additional leadership and personal development ideas. * * *" https://www.leadershipnow.com/leadingblog/2019/08/find_your_ideal_job_and_build.htmlhttp://www.leadershipnow.com/cgi-bin/mt/mt-atom.cgi/weblog/blog_id=1/entry_id=1751

Look at the changes you will need to make on a daily basis and actions you need to take daily in order to reach your goals. Turn those actions into daily habits. Once you get used to doing the same action daily it will make your goals easier to reach over time.

  To healthily administer self help in regards to bipolar disorder, make sure that you establish a daily schedule and stick to it. This is important because it removes any stress that is caused by uncertainty in your life. Having a schedule will help to put your overall life in order.

  Do not dwell on your problems. Think about the solutions for them. If you are constantly thinking about all of the things that are wrong in your life you will not find any happiness. If you take the time to think about how to resolve those problems you will eliminate them altogether.

  You must be able to concentrate and focus if you plan on being successful in this life. No one can make it in this world by just talking and offering opinions all the time. You must be able to listen, and you must be able to take time to learn about new things in a concentrated manner.

  As you seek for a better tomorrow, the information here can assist you in making your dreams a reality. Holding onto your education, motivation and essential strategies help you make a concrete plan and stick to it; without such structure, moving forward may be more difficult than you can manage. By holding onto these strategies–and most importantly, to hope–you are setting your path toward a better, happier outlook.