#you're a really good dave though!

[hairmetal666]

Eddie thought inviting Steve to the Grammys would be fine, cool, no big deal. And it should be, but Steve is walking out of the suite's bedroom wearing a burgundy tuxedo that fits him like a fucking glove. His shirt is unbuttoned just enough to let chest hair peak out, and Eddie thinks he might faint.

He's always been attracted to Steve, of course, but never let it go further than that. Like, sure, Steve was hot as fuck, and sure he was the best guy Eddie had ever met, and sometimes, yeah, he did have to force away thoughts of Steve when he jerked off, and in other circumstances he'd totally be head over heels. Just, Steve is straight, the straightest, a fucking arrow.

Eddie tears his eyes from Steve's body. "You look great, man." He slaps Steve's back. Keeping it cool; keeping it so cool.

"Psh," Steve says. "Have you looked in a mirror? Oh my god." His eyes are saucer wide as they travel down Eddie's body.

"Is it too much?" Eddie crosses his arms over his bare chest.

"Are you kidding? You're--fuck, man. You look good as hell."

He's wearing a silky burgundy shirt, open to show off the necklaces around his throat, his tattoos, the silver in his nipples. His pants are leather, tight, sitting low on his hips and putting the cut of his pelvic bone on full display. They have a lace-up closure that comes dangerously close to showing pube.

Heat rushes to his face at the compliment. "It's--you know. Hazard of the job."

"Yeah, hazard, sure. Guess it's a hard life having hot dudes literally throwing themselves at you."

Eddie barks out a laugh. "That's a vast exaggeration."

"Is it?"

He blushes harder. "You're my date tonight, Steve."

"My point exactly."

His manager and publicist usher them out the door before he can ask what the hell that meant.

---

The ride is giddy and playful, Steve popping champagne to celebrate Eddie's nomination for Song of the Year, even though there's no chance in hell he wins.

Steve is happy. His face is bright with joy, eyes shining, laugh loud and infectious. He's gorgeous, knows it, will be an absolute menace on the red carpet. He's been with Eddie to parties and stuff before, doesn't have any anxiety in front of the camera and isn't obsessed with musicians like Eddie is, unafraid to meet them.

Or so Eddie thought.

Because now they're standing at the edge of the red carpet, Steve very nearly trembling next to him.

"Harrington?"

"That's--That's Madonna." Steve points to her. "We're not even ten feet away from Madonna." He gulps. "Eddie. Madonna."

Steve has met famous people before with Eddie. Ozzy, briefly, Janet Jackson, Dave Grohl, James Hetfield, and he'd always been fine. Barely batted an eye. But get him within reaching distance of Madonna and he falls apart.

Eddie doesn't think about it, grabs Steve's hand, twines their fingers together. "Okay?"

The smile Steve throws him, grateful and a little embarrassed, stabs straight through his heart. He calms as they make it up the carpet, but he doesn't drop Eddie's hand, even when they pause for pictures. In fact, he leans into it, drapes his arm around Eddie's shoulders, or around his waist, seeming to thrive the closer they are. Eddie feels this dangerous pull to indulge in it, to let himself believe it means something, and he doesn't quite have it in him to turn it off.

By the time they reach their seats, Steve is relaxed back to his normal charming and handsome self, doesn't bat an eye as Eddie introduces him around.

The show passes quickly with all the performances and Steve whispering jokes in his ear. It's the best time he's ever had at an award show, like he should have been bringing Steve along this whole time. He's so distracted that he's not really ready when Paula Abdul comes out to announce Song of the Year.

His name is read off as a nominee and Steve grabs his hand, squeezes tight. Eddie's heart flips in his chest. He's not paying attention when Paula opens the envelope, too focused on Steve's strong hand holding his. He hears her say, "And the Grammy goes to--" and everything goes fuzzy.

Steve is saying, "oh my god, oh my god, Eddie. Get up, get up."

And his fucking song is playing and everyone is cheering, a couple people slap his back, and oh shit, oh shit, he fucking won. He stands, Steve with him. He thinks they're going to hug, that's what you do in these situations, but Steve is kissing him. Not on the cheek and not a quick peck, but lip-to-lip, soft and sweet.

Steve just kissed him and he has to get on stage and give a speech. He has no idea what he says because Steve just kissed him. On the lips. On purpose. His ears are ringing and words tumble out of his mouth, thinks he says, "couldn't have done it without you, Stevie," before tripping over his feet to get backstage.

Interviews, photographs, congratulations all help him settle. He's still buzzing with the win, but aware enough now to think the kiss had to be an accident. They've been friends for nearly a decade and Steve never seemed interested in men generally or Eddie specifically.

It takes a while to finish up the backstage business, but when he makes it to his seat, Steve just beams at him. He doesn't mention the kiss, which makes Eddie think he's overreacting. It wasn't a big deal. Sure, he could still feel Steve's lips, warm and soft, against his own, but it didn't mean anything. He's just too in his big gay feelings to be objective.

They don't get a chance to really talk until they're back in the limo and on their way to the after-party.

"You won," Steve says.

"I won." Eddie smiles. "Crazy."

"You deserved it."

He shrugs. "I don't know about that."

"Doesn't matter. You did." Steve fidgets with the cuff of his jacket. "About earlier, um. The kiss. I--"

Eddie feels his face heating, heart kicking up. It was nothing, he knows, and Steve shouldn't have to-- "It was an accident. It's okay. I know you don't--it was the heat of the moment and--I know you're not--you don't--"

Steve blinks a lot, emotions flashing across his face faster than Eddie can categorize.

"What if I do?" Steve asks. His voice is too soft, eyes locked on the cuff link he's fiddling with.

"You--what?"

"What if I did mean it?"

"You're straight."

Steve goes pink. "I'm really not."

"Steve?" He shrieks. "Since when?"

"Um. Since you invited me to this?"

"What the fuck?" Eddie shoves him. "What the fuck, man?"

"I know, I know!" Steve pulls his hand through his hair. "You invited me and I freaked out and I didn't know why, and Robin made the saddest little face at me. Said, 'oh, dingus, you didn't know?' How the fuck was I supposed to know!"

"I think you wanting to fuck me should've been a pretty good indication!"

"I thought that happened to everyone!"

"It doesn't!"

"That's what Robin said!"

They're both yelling.

"Jesus christ. Jesus christ," Eddie keeps repeating.

"Look, I get it if you don't want me too, dude. I know that's not how it works, but I've been pretty crazy about you without realizing it for a while now, so--"

He doesn't mean to, he really doesn't, but he laughs. Like, super loud. Like a donkey bray.

"Okay, can the driver let me out? Like, can I go? I can't--"

"Wait, wait, sweetheart." Steve's gotten up, like he's about to knock on the partition, but Eddie grabs his wrist. "Of course I want you back, you idiot, oh my god."

"Oh." Steve's ears are pink. "Oh. Well. That's good."

Eddie huffs. "Just good? I won a Grammy and the guy I've been pining over for years wants me back. I'm having the night of my life."

"Shut-up." Steve's smile is so big, his eyes so bright.

He raises an eyebrow. "Make me," he says in his lowest register, but he's truly not prepared for it when Steve clambers over to him and lowers himself to straddle Eddie's hips.

"Holy shit," Eddie whispers. "Holy shit, Steve."

He give a wry little smile, eyes locked on Eddie's mouth. "Baby, can I kiss you?"

"Yes." Eddie clears his throat. "Yes, please, do that. Yeah."

Only, he doesn't. He's straddling Eddie, they're so close their breath mingles, and Steve's eyes flicker between Eddie's mouth and his eyes, lips so close to touching but not.

"C'mon, asshole," Eddie says.

"I knew you'd be a brat." He whispers. He wraps his hands into Eddie's hair. "Been dying to do this."

And then they're kissing. They're kissing and it steals all of Eddie's breath and his thoughts, and it's new but it's also like they've been kissing forever, like their lips and tongue know each other, like coming home.

He whines, high-pitched and breathy, and Steve laughs, kisses him deeper, moves closer, and Eddie feels how hard Steve is, the persistent pulse of him. And shit Eddie's close, on the brink just from this, from nothing, oh my god.

Steve's hands drift down Eddie's torso, mapping his chest and his stomach, coming to rest at the laces of his pants. "These have been driving me insane," Steve breaks the kiss to say. "Been thinking about undoing them all night."

"Fuck, sweetheart, you can't say shit like that," Eddie groans.

"Why not?"

"Because--because," Eddie sputters but then Steve's lips are on his neck and he's rolling his hips for friction.

Steve's fingers find the laces again, trace against them. Eddie's legs fall open, arching into the touch. "We're going to be so late," he murmurs as Steve's fingers get to work.

[c0s-lettuce]

common factor - dave lizewski x reader

gender not explicitly mentioned but dave calls reader "ladybug"

synopsis: after getting stood up, you seek out the one person who makes everything better.

word count: 1517

a/n: recently watched kick-ass and omg atj is so cute. inspired by the scene in kick-ass 2 when mindy goes to dave after getting date ditched.

Tonight was slowly becoming a disaster. It had already been a mediocre week at school. So, when a nice boy with blue eyes asked you out, you were eager to say yes.

And so, you stood alone in front of the movies on a chilly Thursday evening as you waited for your date. You knew you had the right time and place. You had checked Ben's message multiple times. But still, you waited for five minutes. Then ten. Then twenty.

You called it quits after thirty-four minutes.

As you begin your walk of shame, you don't yearn for your home or bed. You don't think of anything that would usually provide you comfort. Right now, all you want is your best friend.

So, you make your way over to his place. It had been a while since you climbed up to his window, but you still remember the spots to step and hold on to. Mr Lizewski was rarely ever strict enough to require sneaking around. But it was too late to knock, so the window it was.

You land softly on the floor inside. Dave sleeps soundly in his bed, the light from the street gently illuminating his face. He looks so peaceful that you begin to feel bad for waking him. But your need for comfort overrides your guilt.

"Dave?" you call out, loud enough to wake him.

Dave awakens slowly, blinking in the dimness. His eyes find yours, and he jolts upright.

"Holy shit," he mutters, reaching over to turn on the lamp. "What are you doing here?"

You take a seat on the edge of the bed. "I'm sorry for waking you. I just really needed to see you."

He sits up, immediately concerned. "Hey, what's wrong? Did something happen with Ben?"

You had told him about the date, of course. He was happy for you. Dave is always happy for you.

"He stood me up," you tell him.

Dave's eyes soften, and he pulls you in for a hug. You melt in his embrace, unable to stop the stray tears that fall from your eyes.

"Oh, bug. I'm so sorry. He's such an ass," Dave says softly, rubbing your back.

"I think there's something wrong with me," you say as you pull away.

He furrows his brow. "What? That is not true. How could you say that?"

You shake your head. "No, you don't understand. I'm-"

I'm in love with you, is you want to say.

You want to tell him you only agreed to go out with Ben because his eyes reminded you of Dave's. That's the only reason you paid attention to anyone lately. Alex with the hair, James with the smile and Ben with the eyes. If you broke them all down, Dave would be the common factor.

But the words refuse to come out. So, instead, you say, "I'm hopeless."

"You're not hopeless," Dave reassures.

"Then why does this keep happening?" you ask.

Dave's hands take yours. "It's not you. It's them, okay? They're all jerks. And you know what? I'm glad Ben didn't show. Because you're too good for him, ladybug."

You frown, unsure how to respond to that. You look down at your hands, at how they fit in his.

Dave takes this opportunity to continue, "I mean it. You're so sweet and kind and funny. He doesn't deserve a second of your time, much less your tears."

"I know, you're right," you say. "I guess I just... wanted to be liked."

Dave nods in understanding, "You are, though. You're loved. You don't need Ben to prove that."

His words manage to make you smile a little bit. You nod in response, knowing he's right again.

"Why don't you stay over for the night?" Dave suggests. "I can get you some clothes to sleep in."

"Yeah," you reply. "Yeah, that sounds great."

Dave smiles. "Perfect. You stay right here."

Dave gives you a spare shirt and a pair of pyjama shorts you forgot once during a sleepover. After a quick shower, you get changed and take a moment to compose yourself, not wanting to shed any more tears.

Meanwhile, Dave waits for you in bed. He felt as if his heart could break. You looked so beautiful tonight. You should be out being admired and doted on. But instead, you were left in tears. Dave starts considering putting on his Kick-Ass suit and teaching Ben a lesson.

However, his plans don't go much further before you return from the bathroom. You tiptoe over to the bed, and Dave lifts the covers up for you. You slip in beside him, instantly comforted by the soft sheets and the subtle scent that lingers on them.

You and Dave lie facing each other, the setting familiar and cozy. He reaches forward to play with your hair, brushing his fingers from the top of your head to behind your ear. The repetitive motion soothes you.

"I don't want to see Ben tomorrow," you tell him.

He nods. "I'll stick with you as much as I can. I won't let him bother you."

"I don't know how people do it," you say. "All this dating and relationships, especially in high school."

"I couldn't tell you," he answers. "My one and only girlfriend publicly broke up with me and told me she cheated on me at the same time."

You cringe at the reminder. You remember when Dave started dating Katie. He had such a big crush on her, and you tried your best to be supportive. You tried not to hate her. You were glad when she did something worthy of your resentment.

"God, that was horrible," you say.

"Yeah. Maybe we're both cursed with bad luck," Dave replies.

You frown. "I thought ladybugs are supposed to be lucky."

Dave chuckles at your statement, taking a moment to think. "You're right. Maybe the universe is doing us a favour by showing us we don't need them. You know you'll always matter more to me than some random girl."

"That won't always be true," you say quietly.

"Sure it will, bug," he replies. "It's me and you forever, remember?"

His words make you want to shrivel up under the covers. They take you back to the old days when you and Dave had not a single care in the world.

"Yeah, I remember," you mumble.

Dave smiles. "Good. Don't you forget it."

You take a deep breath, shutting your eyes for a moment. You never expected this night to be so emotionally taxing. A few moments of comfortable silence pass as you try to ground yourself.

"Hey," Dave speaks up after a while. "How about I take you out this weekend?"

You open your eyes again, slightly surprised. How about I take you out?* *You wonder if he phrased it like that on purpose.

"You don't have to," you tell him.

"I want to," he says. "It's been a while since we did something without Todd or Marty. Maybe we can see the new Avengers movie. I know you have a crush on Thor."

You glare at him, feigning offence. "I do not have a crush on Thor."

He grins. "Aw, come on. You can tell me the truth. Though, I'll have to try very hard not to be jealous."

You whack him on the arm, and he laughs.

"Okay, kidding," he says, "But seriously, we can do that. Or watch something else. Or do anything, really."

The ideal appeals to you more than you care to admit. You nod, "I'd like that a lot."

He smiles. "Great. It'll be my treat. We'll have the best time, I promise."

You smile back. "Thanks, Dave."

"Don't mention it," he replies. "Now, go to sleep. Let that pretty head of yours rest."

You do as he says, closing your eyes again. You scoot closer to him, and he wraps an arm around your waist. He kisses you gently on the top of your head, and you can't help but smile.

"Goodnight, Davey," you murmur.

"Goodnight, ladybug," he responds.

An unpleasant beeping wakes you in the morning. It takes a moment for your sleep-addled brain to make sense of everything. You notice you're warm, incredibly warm. You realise it's because Dave's chest is against your back, his arms secure around your body.

You feel as if you could be a puddle right now. It's all so perfect, except for that beeping. It's Dave's alarm. Of course. You forgot it was still a school day.

Dave shifts behind you, and his warmth leaves you as he rolls away. You miss it immediately but aren't awake enough to do anything about it. There's the sound of fumbling before the beeping finally stops. Not a moment sooner, Dave returns, wrapping his arms around you again and holding you tighter than before.

He nuzzles his face against your neck, letting out a deep breath that tickles your skin. It's almost enchanting how quickly sleep calls for you again. Dave doesn't say a word, but it's clear you both agree that school can wait five more minutes.

➸

[ikkyfics]

Rush Hour

Dave Lizewski x f!reader

Summary: "Actually, I think I like it." "The chaos?" Dave asked, confused but already smiling, knowing you well enough to sense you were up to something. "Not exactly," you said, leaning closer to his arm. "I like being this close to you."

Warnings: none

Masterlist

The bus was full of chaotic energy, typical of rush hour. You and Dave were standing side by side, his hands gripping the back of a nearby seat to help with balance as the vehicle swayed on the road. You were far too comfortable with the closeness, enjoying the warmth he radiated and the natural way he made sure to keep you protected from any jostles or stumbles.

"Is the crowd bothering you?" he asked, leaning slightly toward you, his voice soft over the noise of the conversations around.

"Not at all," you answered with a smile, your eyes sparkling as you looked at him. "Actually, I think I like it."

"The chaos?" he asked, confused but already smiling, knowing you well enough to sense you were up to something.

"Not exactly," you said, leaning closer to his arm. "I like being this close to you."

His smile faltered for a second, his blue eyes widening slightly before he laughed quietly, nervous but clearly charmed. "You have a special talent for making me blush, you know that?"

"I know," you replied, shrugging with false innocence. "It's just that you look adorable when you're flustered."

Dave sighed, but the smile on his face couldn't deny it. "You're impossible," he said, with a tone that sounded more like a compliment.

The bus braked suddenly, and you stumbled forward, letting out a small surprised gasp. Before you could process it, Dave’s arms were around you, firm and protective, holding you against him. The warmth of his body enveloped you, and you felt your heart race again, realizing once more how much stronger he was than he appeared under those loose clothes. It never ceased to surprise you, even though you’d spent a generous amount of time with your hands—and your mouth—on him.

"I got you," he said, his voice deep and reassuring, his eyes full of concern as he checked to see if you were alright.

"My hero," you replied, your lips curving into a tender smile.

"Are you really okay?" he asked, his fingers still holding your waist as if he didn’t trust the bus’s balance—or maybe yours.

"Perfectly fine," you replied, but you didn’t bother pulling away. On the contrary, you wrapped your arms around him, resting your chin lightly on his chest, a shameless smile curving your lips. "I think I’ll stay here for a while. It’s a good spot, you know?"

He let out a low laugh, tilting his head to look at you. "Oh, yes, super comfortable. Limited space, people bumping into us every second. A paradise, really."

"It’s comfortable because it’s you," you said softly, your voice full of sincerity.

Dave blinked, clearly taken by surprise, before a slow smile spread across his face. "You have no idea how you dismantle me when you say things like that."

"That’s the idea," you replied, your eyes sparkling with amusement.

But then, you stood on your tiptoes, the movement forcing him to tilt his head a little more. Your lips hovered near his ear as you whispered, "I love you, Dave."

He froze for a second, his face immediately reddening, but the arms around you tightened slightly, as if he wanted to hold you even closer. "I love you too," he replied, his voice low but full of emotion.

You pulled back just enough to meet his gaze, and there was so much tenderness in his blue eyes that your heart seemed to melt. "Now I’m the one who’s flustered," you admitted, laughing quietly as you looked away.

"Nice," he teased, confidence coloring the smile on his face. "Finally, it’s my turn."

You rolled your eyes, but there was a mischievous smile on your lips. Leaning against him, you took advantage of the small space between you to let your hands rest gently on his chest, your fingers tracing lazy circles on his shirt. The warmth of the closeness made him swallow hard, but Dave didn’t look away – maybe a bit more confident, maybe just unable to pull away from you.

"Do you think the others would get really upset if I kissed you now?" you asked, your voice soft and sweet, full of that teasing tone he knew so well.

Dave blinked, clearly trying to process the question as a blush quickly rose from his neck to his cheeks. He looked away for a second, as if he was genuinely considering the people around, but soon met your gaze again, a small smile playing on his lips. "Well, considering how cramped this bus is, I think someone might complain... if they wanted to."

You raised an eyebrow, tilting your head slightly. "And you? Would you complain?"

"Me?" He let out a low laugh, shaking his head. "You already know the answer."

The smile on your lips grew, and before he could think of anything else to say, you rose on your tiptoes and pressed a quick, light kiss to his lips. It was sweet and subtle, but the intensity in the way you looked at him afterward made the moment feel so much bigger.

Dave stood frozen, his eyes sparkling and his mouth slightly open, as if he was trying to find words that didn’t come. "You shouldn’t do that," he finally said, his voice low and a little hoarse.

You furrowed your brow, more curious than worried. "Why not?"

He sighed, a small smile forming as he lowered his head to whisper near your ear. "Because here, right now, I can’t kiss you the way I want to."

The sentence hung in the air between you, and the heat spread across your face instantly. Your eyes met his, and there was something in Dave’s gaze that mixed both affection and a touch of boldness, leaving you completely speechless for a second.

"Dave Lizewski," you murmured, feeling the smile form on your lips again. "You’re getting really good at this, you know?"

He shrugged, but the casual tone was broken by the way he looked at you, a constant gleam in his eyes that said more than any words could. "I learned from the best," he replied, sincerity evident in his voice.

You couldn’t resist, resting your head against his chest again, the rhythmic sound of his heart making you smile even more. He wrapped his arm around your shoulders, giving a light squeeze, as if the presence of so many people around just didn’t matter.

The bus jolted again, but neither of you seemed to care. You were there, together, immersed in the sweet and quiet moment that only the two of you could share.

"Promise you’ll kiss me properly later?" you asked softly, just for him to hear.

"I promise," he replied, and there was something in his voice that made your heart race – something between fun, tenderness, and the kind of certainty only Dave could put into such simple words.

[asterias-record-shop]

MORE DAVE LIZEWSKI SMUT PLEASE I'M BEGGING YOU 😩

┎┈┈┈┈┈┈┈𓆩♡𓆪┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┒

— i just got railed in the copy room

┖┈┈┈┈┈┈┈𓆩♡𓆪┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┚

Okay but Dave with a Mean Nympho reader. A cheerleader known for sleeping around and he unknowingly goes to one of your spots to get a jacket he forgot while running an errand for a teacher?

— Mean! Nympho! Reader who goes to the copy room to meet up with one of her hookups who don’t show, so you decide to get off on your own by humping a jacket left on one of the cushioned chairs. You couldn’t help it, it smelled so fucking good and felt like heaven when you rubbed it along your clothed pussy.

— Mean! Nympho! Reader who is so lost in pleasure that you don’t even realize Dave walking in to get said jacket that you’re humping against, soaking it in arousal as you desperately try to chase your high. The texture of the grey sweater over the hard side of the cushion wasn’t enough, your skirt being pulled up as you fondled your clit roughly, whining.

— Oblivious! Virgin! Dave not knowing what the hell to do. You were humping his jacket, you were making a mess on his jacket. Did you know that it was his jacket?

— Mean! Nympho! Reader yelling at him for being a perv and staring at you even though you’re the one fucking yourself in a public place. In a school for fucks sake.

“I-I’m not being a perv! You’re just… you’re on my j-jacket.”

— Mean! Nympho! Reader who looks down and sees the name ‘Dave’ scrawled on the tag you were using to rub against your folds to get that perfect zing up your back.

“You’re Dave?”

“Y-Yeah, yeah, I-I’m Dave.”

“You got a big dick, Dave?”

— Mean! Nympho! Reader who gets Dave to sit back in the chair, slowly pulling out his cock and stroking it before pushing it inside of your pussy, groaning as you muffled his moans with your lips.

"Please baby... please, be quieter, you don't want us to get caught, do you?"

— Oblivious! Virgin! Dave losing his virginity in a damn copy room to the hottest girl ever. He couldn't stop moaning, though, even with your mouth on his, you tasted so fucking good.

— Mean! Nympho! Reader who pulled away from his lips to bounce on his cock, the best cock you had ever felt, longer and thicker than the other one's that you've ever had.

— Oblivious! Virgin! Dave who pressed his face into your neck to try and hold back his explicitly loud moans, peeking up to watch you take out a golden handheld mirror and a tube of lipgloss, parting your lips and trying to control your mouth to stay still as you put on another coat of lipgloss.

"You're so lucky you're dick's good or I wouldn't have let you kiss me. Messing up a hundred dollar layer of gloss, fucking asshole."

— Oblivious! Virgin! Dave who apologizes frantically, gasping as you leaned down to cup his balls before pressing a firm kiss to his lips. He's confused at first, crazy confused before you pulled away, letting your tongue stroke over his before you pulled away again, laughing.

“I like it when you’re lips are covered in my lipgloss, David.”

“I-It’s just Dave. P-People just call me Dave.”

— Oblivious! Virgin! Dave who watched you pout, your hips stopping just when he was about to cum for the first time inside of an actual girl, your nails digging into his shoulders making him wince.

“You fit me along with other people, David? Really?”

— Oblivious! Virgin! Dave who scrambled out an apology, shaking his head as he held your hips, trying to get you to move again.

“N-No, no of course not! Of course not, Y/N, you’re a goddess, please please don’t stop.”

— Mean! Nympho! Reader who laughs and squeezed his balls, watching his face pinch up in a mix of pleasure and pain, groaning as you sink down on his full length, groaning as his cock pushed into that perfect spot inside of you and you clenched around his cock, a loud groan falling from his mouth as you whimpered softly, quickly covering it up with a quick exhale.

"Where's your phone?"

— Oblivious! Virgin! Dave who lifted his hips easily making you yelp, taking his phone out of his back pocket and handed it to you unlocked, watching as you giggled and showed him the comic book lockscreen.

"Cute."

— Mean! Nympho! Reader who watched him swallow loudly, putting your name to your number and pushing it into his chest as you lifted off of his cock and kissed his lips softly.

"This should happen more often, David. I like your dick, and you. Text me, you're my main dick now. I expect to be fucked daily, and when I say daily, I mean daily. If you got any other bitches, get rid of them, before I fuck you in front of them. Got it?"

— Oblivious! Virgin! Dave who immediately nods and stared up at you, smiling.

"Whatever you say, my goddess."

Taglist: 𓆩[@lem0ns77]𓆪   𓆩[@cecepop15]𓆪   𓆩[@memeorydotcom]𓆪   𓆩[@your-favorite-god]𓆪   𓆩[@xyzstar]𓆪  𓆩[@just-my-shit]𓆪   𓆩[@your-mom21]𓆪   𓆩[@c78r]𓆪   𓆩[@dizscreams]𓆪   𓆩[@asrt5]𓆪   𓆩[@xoxomoonlightbabe]𓆪   𓆩[@copypastedaphne]𓆪

© asterias-record-shop

[thewertsearch]

PCG: IF YOU SEE KANAYA IN DEATHBUBBLE HELL, PLEASE TELL HER I'M SORRY I LET HER DOWN. PCG: AND IF YOU SEE SOLLUX WANDERING AROUND TOO, LET HIM KNOW HOW ASHAMED I AM I DITCHED HIM LIKE A COWARD BECAUSE I HEARD A HORN GO HONK. PCG: AND TEREZI PCG: IF YOU SEE HER PCG: COULD YOU GIVE HER A MESSAGE FOR ME? PCG: TELL HER THAT PCG: ACTUALLY PCG: NEVER MIND. PCG: I'LL PROBABLY BE ABLE TO TELL THEM ALL IN PERSON SOON. PCG: SEEING AS AN IDIOT IN MAKEUP IS ABOUT TO ROLL OVER MY NAKED SQUEAL PIPETTE WITH A ONE WHEEL DEVICE. FGA: Sollux Is Okay FGA: Hes With Me Right Now PCG: HOLY SHIT PCG: YOU'RE ALIVE FGA: Hold On I Really Need To Change These Clothes

Have I ever mentioned how much I love Kanaya? Because I love Kanaya. Even before her vampirism, she was always a ray of light in the darkness.

Also, reading this paragraph has reminded me that we already know why Sollux shouldn't be able to see the Green Sun.

HE'S BLIND, REMEMBER?

I assume his dream projection just didn't inherit that trait. No idea why he can only see it with one eye, though.

After the Gamzee/Tavros fakeout, I don't have a clue whether this one's supposed to be a Dream Bubble - and frankly, I'm not even sure if I want this to be Gamzee's ghost.

Up until recently, I’ve safely been able to assume that a character’s death would mark an end to any threat they represent, at least until they get resurrected. With the introduction of these Bubbles, though, characters can now continue to affect the plot after they've been taken off the board. In the case of our heroes, that's obviously a good thing, but we've got plenty of characters who were taken off the board for a reason.

Now, Vriska’s ghost is already mellowing out, and Eridan’s not resourceful enough to pull anything crafty – but Gamzee’s ghost? That’s one we should probably keep an eye on.

TC: it's all your fault.

Why? What did Dave do?

...oh, right, right, the ICP video. Based on Gamzee's comment about not having a 'good pie' for a while, I think Dave might have triggered Gamzee's crisis of faith just as he started to go cold turkey. This really was a nightmare scenario for the poor guy.

[pulsarsatellite]

Clear Skies

The FINAL CHAPTER of Days of Laughs and Nights of Screams is now up to read on AO3!

You can read the last chapter here!

Chapter Snippet:

Keep reading

[latenightreadingpdf]

Hidden in Plain Sight - Dave Lizewski

₊‧⁺˖⋆ Masterlist ⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆ Part 2 ⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆ Part 3 ⋆˖⁺‧₊

Summary: When Y/S/N saves Kick-Ass from a dangerous situation, he becomes obsessed with trying to uncover her true identity. Little does he know, Y/S/N is a girl from his school who secretly has a crush on him as well. As they patrol together, their worlds collide in ways neither expected, leading to a surprising revelation about who's really behind the mask.

Y/S/N - Your superhero name

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

The night sky over New York had a strange way of making a person feel invincible. Dave Lizewski, aka Kick-Ass, was just starting out his amateur superhero career and was already way in over his head. Sure, he'd gotten a few decent hits in on some petty thugs before, but most of the time, he spent more energy trying not to die than actually fighting crime.

Tonight was one of those nights.

He sprinted down an alley, panting, adrenaline surging through his veins. Behind him, two guys—huge, brawny types who clearly had nothing better to do than terrorize the innocent—chased him with knives. His green suit felt like a second skin, clinging to him with every move, though it wasn’t exactly made for high-intensity situations like this. His lungs burned, and a stitch formed in his side. Not good.

“I swear,” he gasped to himself, “I’m gonna die.”

The alley came to an abrupt dead end. He cursed, turning just in time to see the guys closing in, grinning like they'd won the lottery. He raised his fists, trying to look braver than he felt.

"This... is not going to end well," Dave muttered.

Before either of them could lunge, something fast and powerful blurred from the shadows, hitting one of the thugs with such force that he flew backward, crashing into a stack of crates. The second guy barely had time to react before the figure was on him too, taking him down with an expert kick to the stomach.

Dave blinked in disbelief. The figure straightened, revealing a young woman in a sleek, black suit. It wasn’t flashy, but it looked way more professional than his own green and yellow DIY get-up. She had an aura of confidence and strength that radiated even in the dim light.

And, yeah, Dave noticed, she had a killer figure.

"You... you just saved my life!" Dave stammered.

The girl rolled her eyes behind her mask. “Yeah, and I’m guessing it won’t be the last time, Kick-Ass.”

Kick-Ass. She knew his name.

“Wait, who are you?” he asked, his voice still shaky from the adrenaline.

“Call me Y/S/N,” she said casually, as if saving people from imminent death was just another Friday night. “You really should be more prepared for situations like this.”

“I... I thought I was.”

Y/S/N snorted, crossing her arms. "Really? No backup, no weapons? Just... that?" She gestured to his suit. "You're gonna get yourself killed."

Dave flushed, partly from embarrassment and partly from the rush of adrenaline still coursing through him. “I’ll... I’ll do better,” he promised lamely, watching as she walked away, her silhouette disappearing into the night.

And just like that, she was gone.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

At Atomic Comics the next day, Dave was still riding the adrenaline high from his encounter with the mysterious heroine. His friends, Todd and Marty, sat across from him, distracted by the latest issue of X-Men, while Dave rambled on about her.

“I swear, you guys, she was like something out of The Avengers. She totally saved my ass last night. And she was hot. I mean, like, really hot. Her suit—it was super tight. I could barely focus.”

Todd raised an eyebrow, putting his comic down. “Dude, you’re such a nerd. A hot superhero saves you, and that’s what you focus on?”

Dave shrugged, grinning sheepishly. “I mean, yeah? You didn’t see her. She’s got this whole thing going on—great moves, great...uh...form. Her ass is—”

"Wow. Really going full perv, aren't we?" Marty quipped, rolling his eyes.

Unbeknownst to Dave, someone had been listening. On the other side of a nearby shelf, Y/N, the kind and somewhat popular girl from school, had been browsing comics too. She knew who Dave was—after all, they had a few classes together—but they had never really talked.

Y/N smiled to herself as she overheard Dave’s rant about his superhero crush. Little did he know that she was Y/S/N, the very girl who had saved his life last night. Hearing him talk about her alter-ego like that—saying she was cool, hot, and all that—was...well, flattering in a weird way. And the fact that he was so obviously into her made things a lot more interesting.

Still smiling, Y/N grabbed a random comic, paid for it, and headed out, a plan forming in her head.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

Later that week, Dave suited up as Kick-Ass once again, hoping to catch a glimpse of Y/S/N during his patrol. After their first encounter, he couldn’t stop thinking about her. She had this presence that he couldn’t shake off, and it didn’t help that his crush was amplified by the fact that she’d saved him. She was the real deal—a hero, like he wanted to be.

“Kick-Ass.”

Dave turned at the sound of her voice, heart skipping a beat. She was there, perched casually on a rooftop ledge, looking down at him with that same cool confidence.

“Y/S/N!” He tried to sound smooth, but his voice cracked just a little.

“You’re not going to need saving again, are you?” she teased, dropping down to the street in front of him.

“I’ve got it covered this time,” he said, puffing out his chest just a little. “Totally prepared.”

Y/S/N gave him a once-over, amusement flickering in her eyes. “Sure you are.”

The two of them walked together, patrolling the empty streets, though it was a quiet night—too quiet, really.

“So, Kick-Ass,” Y/S/N started, her voice casual. “There’s this guy I go to school with. He’s in a few of my classes.”

Dave’s heart gave a little lurch. Was she... opening up to him? Maybe this was his chance to learn more about her.

“Yeah? What about him?” he asked, trying to keep his voice steady.

“He’s super nerdy, kind of awkward. But he’s... well, he’s hot. Like, really hot.”

Dave blinked. “Wait, what?”

“I bet he’s got... you know, a lot going on,” she continued, her voice dropping slightly. “In more ways than one.”

Dave felt his face flush. “Oh.”

“I can’t focus in class because I’m too busy thinking about him,” she added. “It’s a problem, I don’t know what to do.”

“Wow, okay. Um... who’s the guy?” he asked, not really wanting to know but needing to at the same time.

“Dave Lizewski,” Y/S/N said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Dave stopped dead in his tracks. His brain short-circuited for a second. “Wait... what? Did you just... did you just say Dave Lizewski?”

She turned to face him, her expression unreadable behind her mask. “Yeah, why? You know him?”

“I—uh—” Dave’s thoughts tumbled over each other in a chaotic mess. She knows me. She actually knows me. And she thinks I’m hot?!

Y/S/N didn’t give him any time to process. “Anyway, I gotta run. Crime won’t stop itself.” She gave him a little wave before disappearing into the night once more, leaving Dave standing there, still in shock.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

That night, Dave immediately FaceTimed Todd and Marty, pacing his room in a frenzy.

“Guys! You are not going to believe what just happened!” he blurted out as soon as they answered.

“What is it now, man?” Marty asked, exasperated.

“I think Y/S/N goes to our school.”

Both of them stared at him blankly through the screen.

“No, seriously! She was talking about a guy she likes in her classes. And then she said my name! My actual name!”

Todd snorted. “Okay, but how do you know she’s not just messing with you?”

“I... don’t know. But it seemed real,” Dave insisted. “I think she really goes to school with me. And now I have to figure out who she is.”

He grabbed his old yearbook off the shelf and flipped it open. “There’s gotta be some kind of clue.”

Todd and Marty exchanged skeptical glances but eventually joined in, helping him comb through the yearbook. They scanned faces, trying to match anyone they knew with the mystery of Y/S/N.

“Alright, so we need a plan,” Dave said, leaning over the pages. “Monday, we’re going to do some recon. Check out anyone who might be her. We’ll figure this out.”

Todd and Marty, albeit reluctantly, nodded in agreement.

“Sure, dude. Recon mission on Monday.”

Dave closed the yearbook with a snap, his mind racing. Somewhere in the sea of students, Y/S/N was hiding in plain sight. And now, he was more determined than ever to find out who she was—both in and out of her suit.

Little did he know, Monday would bring him more answers than he could’ve ever expected.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

A/N ~ there’s not enough Kick-Ass fanfics on here and I’m sick of it :( lmk if you want a part 2

[ddejavvu]

Reader who makes Aaron blush!!!!! Maybe the bau are out together after a case has wrapped up, and the reader says sm cute to him and he starts blushing and everyone starts teasing them <3

There's a woman that nearly walks into a table while passing your own in the bar, and you can't really blame her. Your team is a gorgeous bunch, but you suspect the woman's eyes had been singling out the tall, dark, and handsome figure of your boss.

Her friends helps yank her out of the way before she can topple the table, and she seems too embarrassed at her near-spill to come over, if that had been her intention in the first place. You're glad, because even if you can't blame her for finding Aaron handsome, you can be jealous.

"Poor thing," Emily tuts, "Derek, button your shirt up a bit, you're causing traffic jams."

Morgan grins at her observation, but you down the last of your drink for the courage you need to speak.

You attempt it casually: "I dunno. Seemed like she was eyeing up Mr. Smokeshow over here," You nod towards Aaron, then glance around at everyone's glasses, "Anyone need a refill?"

"Me, please." JJ recovers quickly from her barely-masked delight, having clocked your not-so-subtle crush on Hotch from the beginning. She slides her glass over to you and you catch it before it can hit the ground, looking back up at everyone else.

"Mine, JJ's, anyone else?"

"We're good." Reid decides, his smile tight-lipped, "Thanks, L/N."

You take your leave with a nod and a grin, hoping they don't notice the slight tremor in your hands as you turn away with the glasses. They barely wait until you're out of earshot to round on Hotch, and he's glad he hadn't given you his drink so that he can bury his burning cheeks in it.

"Mr. Smokeshow," Derek kicks him beneath the table with a shit-eating grin, "Hey, bet no one's ever called you that before."

"Derek-"

"Maybe you can have it engraved on a plaque for your desk," Rossi goads, "You can just throw out the one you've got, your name doesn't matter anymore."

"Dave. She was kidding." Aaron scolds, and JJ thumps her fist on the table.

"She was not kidding! Oh, my god, you are absolutely impossible! She likes you," JJ levels him with a knowing stare, "What is it going to take for you to believe it, her dropping to her knees?"

"Well what if she's just tying his shoe?" Emily frowns in mock worry, "You have to be careful about that sort of thing."

"I do have to be careful," Hotch insists, keeping a wary eye on you to be sure you're still occupied and out of earshot, "Expressing interest in a member of my team would be disastrous if they didn't feel the same."

"Yeah, but she does feel the same," Reid gives Aaron a pitying glance, "I'm not exactly the BAU's matchmaking expert, but I know that."

"She's coming back," Penelope elbows Reid, and the man winces as her arm hits his slender side, "Everyone shut up!"

"Here," You slide JJ her drink back, taking your seat beside Derek and across from Hotch, "What did I miss?"

"Oh, the usual," Emily shrugs, but there's delight dancing in her eyes, "Just talking about blowjobs."

Your eyes shoot wide in surprise but you stifle a laugh into the rim of your glass, "Oh, yeah. That's what I thought. Who are we blowing?"

"No one." Aaron clears his throat, nearly choking on the last of his drink that he downs, "I changed my mind, I'll go for a refill."

He seems much more calm and collected as he beelines for the bar than you had, but you try not to stare too long at his departure lest someone catches on. Apparently, though, they already have; you turn back to the table and six pairs of eyes are on you, all accompanied by identical grins.

You don't let them get a single word out as you raise your glass to your lips, "Shut up."

[youcouldmakealife]

SOTM: Luke/Andreas; wined and dined

For the prompt: Andreas and Luke meeting/hooking up the second time

I literally finished this before I realised you guys probably meant like, the second time they hooked up, not the whole second time 'round. Mea culpa, everybody. And for those who interpreted it the same way I did...you're welcome?

Andreas can’t remember the last time he was wined and dined.

Though maybe that isn’t the best way to describe it — Andreas has dinner meetings all the time, has sat beside clients at the best restaurants in almost every NHL city, sampled from the menus of half of New York's most exclusive restaurants. Always on the agency’s dime, of course, or his multi-millionaire client’s, or the teams they play for, or the teams who want to sign them.

There’s plenty of wine involved — though Andreas always restricts himself to a glass when it's business — plenty of dining. But a meeting’s a meeting, whether it’s in a conference room, patiently waiting for a GM who’s been around since there were still six teams in the league to figure out how to unmute his mic, or eating something exceptional at a Michelin Star restaurant.

So obviously that’s not what he means. It’s not that he hasn’t been dating either, though admittedly, he had less and less time to spare for it as he got older. And not that he hasn’t gone on dinner dates specifically, where he allows himself a second glass of wine, orders what he’d like, rather than ‘what he’s having sounds good’, unless, Andreas supposes, it truly does sound good. So there has been wining and dining, in fact. Possibly even a surplus of it.

And yet.

At a certain point Andreas thinks he just stopped expecting romance. It wasn’t any sort of resigned, jaded disappointment at the dating scene. Not that it isn't a shitshow, but it's probably better here than just about anywhere else. More an acknowledgment that most guys didn’t seem to be looking for romance, at least the ones Andreas was dating.

And that was fine, because Andreas wasn’t really looking for it either. Romance was undeniably nice, but he worked long hours, put almost all of himself into his job, and what he had left didn’t require much more than good conversation and some companionship, a spark of attraction, mediocre or better sex. Romance might have come along down the line, but things didn’t tend to last long even when he did find someone who met his simple — yet almost impossible to find — criteria.

That one, he thinks has more to do with him than it does with them. Andreas’ career is one of those things that’s attractive in theory, but significantly less endearing when he’s slipping in and out of bed at all hours, constantly checking his email or ducking out to make a call, flying off to who knows where, sometimes with plenty of notice, sometimes with none at all.

Maybe his life just isn’t conducive to romance. He doesn’t like to think that, but there would be worse things, wouldn’t there? He has a job that he finds fascinating, a job that offers something different every day, a job that, incidentally, pays him more money than he has the time to spend. He could retire tomorrow if he wanted to, live the rest of his life in comfort, dedicate all his time to searching for true love, but why would he want to? It sounds excruciatingly boring.

So he works — he works a lot, works more than he should, at least according to everyone he knows, including Dave, the giant hypocrite — and he — well, he works. But it’s fine. Most people have to search for meaning in his life, but he has his. If anyone asks about it — and they all ask, except Dave, that gem of a fucking man — he says he doesn’t feel like he’s lacking anything. He’s not lying, either.

That doesn’t mean something doesn’t squeeze tight when Luke conveniently ‘happens to be in town’ — though if there’s any town that actually applies to, it’s New York — when he figures they should ‘catch up’. Even as he tells himself that he’s just catching up with an old flame, one who doesn’t even live in the same country as him anymore. Even as he tells himself once for old time’s sake, and then twice doesn’t hurt considering they’ve still got chemistry, then when it’s been three, four, half a dozen, and if Luke’s got a return ticket Andreas doesn’t know when it’s for, but it doesn’t feel like it’s any time soon.

Luke has always been a romantic. He’d deny it up and down if Andreas said it, and it wouldn’t even be a kneejerk macho shit — Andreas doesn’t think Luke even knows he does anything out of the ordinary. Andreas doubts he was thinking ‘I’m going to woo Andreas’ as he asked him out to dinner, not the first time, or the second, not when he came with a bag of groceries and a bottle of wine from a vineyard Andreas mentioned in passing, said he’d cook for him, laughing as he fought with Andreas’ temperamental bottle opener, scoffing when Andreas impatiently intervened before he could ruin a good bottle of wine.

Technically, he doesn’t even know if 'wooing' is Luke’s aim at all. He could just need the change of pace, miss the city, the speed of it, the convenience, and while he was here, Andreas was just as convenient as the rest of it — good conversation, good companionship, Luke more attractive than ever, the sex still fantastic. And they didn’t even have to get to know one another. What could be easier?

But Andreas doesn’t think so, at least not judging by the way Luke’s started looking at him.

Andreas doesn’t think anyone has ever looked at him like Luke does, the complete focus of it. Looking isn’t a strong enough word — it’s more like he’s taking him in, trying make sure that he gets every single detail correct, the way Andreas imagines a painter would gaze at their subject, a poet at their lover. Luke’s no poet, but, well — maybe he is, a little, minus the words. There’s something about the way Luke looks at the world. Something about the way Luke looks at him.

It used to unnerve Andreas, a little, especially because Luke wasn’t only looking at him like that over romantic candlelit dinners and endorphin fueled pillow talk, but also during the most mundane moments. Andreas would be scowling at his phone, pecking out an answer to a client who decided he urgently needed to discuss his contract on a Sunday morning, a full season before it expired, and he’d look up and there Luke was, visibly taking him in. Sometimes there’d be a little smile on his face — the moments Andreas let himself be a little cranky there often was — but often there wasn’t, just Luke’s eyes on him, taking him in like he was never going to see him again.

It was — a lot. Luke was a lot, almost from the very beginning. Andreas thought he was going to get a regrettable hook up out of things, and then he thought it was going to be a few of them, and it was like a switch was flipped, and Luke went from the hot, fun, surprisingly good in bed client Andreas had completely unprofessionally fucked — and not just once, but a few times, and then a handful — to even more surprisingly good company outside of bed, to something Andreas didn’t quite have a name for. Someone who was gone even more than Andreas was, someone Andreas started to miss when he was gone. Andreas was the one staying put, most of the time, but Luke was the one always watching him like he’d disappear the moment he closed his eyes.

The look hasn’t changed, and Andreas imagines it means the same thing now as it did then, Luke who doesn’t blink, Luke who jumps both feet first, Luke the romantic.

It doesn’t feel as overwhelming now, though Andreas suspects he’ll be spending some time thinking about just how quickly Luke was on board. How quick they both were — Andreas can’t pretend he doesn’t know what’s coming, what’s already here, can’t pretend that isn’t something he wants, when he could end things with a word.

But he doesn’t. This time Andreas lets himself look back, and when Luke catches him at it, he doesn’t let himself look away.

[de4dlyniightshade]

I’d really just like to request your most feral Spencer Reid headcanons. SFW, NSFW, raunchy, tame - whatever. Just your like “I will fight anyone who disagrees, they are fact” type headcanons.

(Because I reread all your headcanons and love every single one)

I BEEN WAITING ON SOMEONE ASKING THIS! i've also just been meaning to make a hc post.

i was gonna split them into nsfw and sfw but they just ended up all mixed together 0-0

submissive and breedable spencer truther til i fucking die i'll get him pregnant don't play with me.

loves messy kisses like spit running down his chin, tongues down each others throat, desperately gripping at each other type of kisses.

maybe just me projecting and taking what mgg said as gospel truth but i fully believe that spencer loves a curvy woman, not even just for sexual reasons he also loves to rest his head on a nice big pair of boobs or thighs.

speaking of, boob guy! shamefully, but still a boob guy! adores groping your boobs whenever he can and would have your boob in his mouth 24/7 if he could, has literally fallen asleep with his head under your shirt and your nipple in his mouth.

munch! like the biggest munch ever, loves nothing more than coming home from a long day and burying his face between your thighs or having you ride his face.

knows full well that toys are his teammate and not his competitors and has no insecurities about you using toys on yourself or owning any.

does not care how well groomed you are, if you asked him what he preferred he'd be like??? it's literally none of my business???

needs lots of reassurance during sex, he just likes to know that he's doing good and making you feel good throughout the whole thing.

doesn't like talking about his sex life, especially with derek, no matter how hard he pressed and pries spencer wont let anything but the bare minimum out.

i imagine he's more drawn to a commanding woman, someone who will take the lead and teach him because of his inexperience and finds that he actually loves being dominated and hardly has any desire to dominate you.

really vocal! even though i've already said it like twice he just is, i can feel it in my bones, he's just such a whiny little baby and can't help but moan loudly any time you're touching him.

is completely against the idea of road head until you do it while you're on a long drive and it both changes his life and almost ends it bcs he swerved into the other lane which was luckily empty.

still gets shy when you kiss him in front even the team even years down the line.

learns to cook so he can make you breakfast whenever you're staying at his apartment.

on the same lines, lovesss morning sex, just that feeling of not wanting to get out your warm bed into the cold air, savouring the warmth in the best way possible.

had no idea what queefing was real until it happened and he was like genuinely so fascinated rather than disgusted.

i feel like spencer would own a bird for sure, not just bcs of gideon but he did help him realise how cool birds are which made him get one, probably a cockatiel or parrotlet with some silly name like dave.

all bark, no bite. likes to act a big game in front of others but the second you're alone he's begging and calling you mommy.

loves nothing more than waking up before you, pressing a kiss to your forehead before carefully and quietly getting out of bed to make you breakfast with the intention of bringing it to you but when you wake up before him and sneak up behind him to wrap your arms around his waist he can't help but melt.

very open to experimenting further down the line, anything you want to try he'll try at least once, except for blindfolds on himself, would be completely open to blindfolding you though.

loves public touching, not outright sex but he'd love when you subtly brush your hand over his crotch or take a handful of his ass in a public place.

teaches you how to knit and cries when you actually make him something like a sweater or even just a hat bcs he realises that's why you wanted to learn in the first place.

can't ride a bike.(this is definitely me projecting bcs i can't but i just feel like he can't okay)

lana enjoyer!!! especially if you are, he just wants to understand all the things you love and if you love lana so does he, he'd love to hear you ramble about your favourite songs and would take note of them and listen to them asap and tell you he loves them even if he didn't like some that much bcs he loves how happy it makes you.

wouldn't want to introduce you to his mother too soon but if you ended up meeting her by chance he'd be sweating buckets in case you didn't get along but you two just bond over your adoration for him and he's just so happy about it.

probably took a while to warm up to physical touch in the beginning bcs of his germophobia but when he finally does he regrets not doing it sooner.

washes his hands every single time before touching you sexually, not even for his benefit, he just wants to be as safe as possible with you.

loves elvis and almost proposes on the spot when you offer to dance with him to can't help falling in love, secretly sheds a few tears while you waltz around his apartment in your pyjamas.

okay i've definitely left stuff out that i've thought of but this is long asf so i'll leave it there😭

[kyemna]

Hazbin Hotel headcanons

TW: Mentions of sex and alcohol. some suggestive themes that's it, it's mostly just fluff.

(English isn't my first language)

Charlie

-Will do anything for you.

-you want flowers? Done. You saw a cute stuffed animal in the store front and you want it? You got it. Somebody harassed you on the streets and you want them punished? Let her take care of it. Normally she's against violence, but when it comes to protecting you? She'll do anything.

-will sing to you, all the time

-made a special song that she sings to you when you've had a bad day

-the best listener ever.

-will sit and listen to you talk for hours

-if she needs to get to work early, she'll make you breakfast and leave you a note that says something like:

-hi, good morning lovely! I hope you sleep well.

I had to leave early.. something happened at the hotel while Alastor was away, and they needed me.

See you 2night, i love you:)<3

-i think her love languages are physical touch and words of affirmation

Angel Dust

-whisper's provocative things to you during meetings

-definitely a physical touch kind of guy.

-Will cling to you at the most random times

-keeps Valentino as far away from you as possible.

-tries his best to keep his relationships hidden from him as well

-if you'd come home after a long day, he'd give you a massage

-is super funny, tell me otherwise.

-has a high sex drive, and is pretty kinky due to his job.

-so expect him to ring you up at the most unexpected times.

-PS. Don't put him on speaker when you're in public..

Vaggie

-was pretty cautious around you in the beginning, but slowly warms up to you

-once she's comfortable, she tells the wildest stories and acts them out for you

-if you don't know how to fight, she'll teach you

-if you do know how to fight, you guys spar all the time

-jealousy issues, and you can't tell me other wise.

-she hears someone talk to you in a tone she doesn't like? Glare. Someone low-key flirting with you? Glare. If looks could kill.. she will actually kill them though, so..

-not super experienced in bed, but she's open to suggestions

-once she finds something she likes/is comfortable with, she askes you for it all the time

-a "words of affirmation" and "acts of service" girl for sure

Alastor

(i am perfectly aware he's ace, but these are scenario's for if he wasn't, don't come for me)

-now, Alastor is a great dancer.

-he has great music taste too!

-listens to 1940's and below.

-i think he's mostly into Jazz and Classical music to be honest

-i do think Amy Winehouse and Dave Brubeck are his exceptions when it comes to listening to 1950's and above

-somehow always knows where you are..? You often see his shadows follow you, so that's probably why

-kills for you. Also because he has a thirst for blood, that needs to be satisfied. So that's 2 birds with one stone

-holds doors open for you

-just a general gentleman

-loves it when you wear dark red, dark blue and dark green

-it can be anything. Lipstick (just red though), a hat, a dress, heels, etc.

-expects you to respect his personal space but doesn't respect yours LMFAO

-gift giving and physical touch

Husk

-knows all your favorite drinks

-loves to dance with you

-also a Jazz person, but I don't think he'd mind country music to be honest

-once he secretly took a picture of you.

-he thought you looked so good, he keeps it in his nightstand.

-doesn't really talk about his problems/feelings, but prefers it if you do.

-respects your boundaries more than anyone.

-you don't wanna talk? He'll kiss your forehead, and leave you alone.

-you don't really like being touched? He'll always ask first.

-other than making amazing alcoholic drinks, he makes great coffee too!

-quality time and physical touch.

It's been quite a while since i've written something, so I apologize if there's any grammar mistakes or sentences that just don't make any sense LOL

Thank you for reading!

[fbfh]

Could I request a drabble with Dave Lizewski and his best friend who has a major crush on Kick Ass and tells Dave all the dirty details?

OOOOOH SCRUMDIDDLYUMPTIOUS. aged up to 18+ obvs, give me a hoot or holler in the notes or my ask box if you want a fluffier version lol

Dave always wondered why girls never noticed him. he figured it was cause he's a quiet geeky nerd who likes comic books and superheroes. nope. it's because of you. when you first met Dave - however old you were, freshman, middle schoolers, kindergarteners - you latched the fuck onto this boy so fast. you've always been protective over him, always had that vibe that says you fuck with him, I'll fuck you up. besides, having a best friend as hot as you immediately made everyone assume he's totally off the market. like, it should be obvious. being "best friends" with someone as hot as you, spending all your time together - you have sleepovers for god's sake. EVERYONE at school fully believes you're fucking. the only ones unaware of this are Dave and Todd and Marty and possibly yourself.

it's at one of these infamous sleepovers that you finally spilled the beans. you've been obsessing over kickass for weeks, constantly talking about him and his exploits to Dave. you just got your hands on another grainy, horribly low quality picture of kickass stopping a purse snatching from someone's video doorbell. you're sitting at Dave's desk while he's flopped on his bed, finishing some homework.

"fuck I want him in my mouth so fucking bad..."

it just slips out, but Dave is instantly hard. he startles, sputtering and desperate to know who his best friend is practically moaning for.

"y-you want who?!" he demands in confusion at your sudden outburst, causing both of you to laugh. you turn the monitor towards him, and Dave sees himself looking back. his stomach does the thing, that flippy jerky oh shit thing from both anxiety and horniness. he is really, really hard now.

"k-kickass?" he asks, his voice getting all whiny and cracking in that way you've always found so cute.

"yes!" you exclaim with a laugh, looking at him incredulously. "come on Dave, you told me about a sex dream you had about our math teacher two days ago. he groans half heartedly at you bringing up.

"I already regret telling you about that." he protests playfully, his voice muffled into his duvet.

"just look at him," you sigh, already looking at the pictures of kickass. "look at his arms... I'd probably cum just from him putting me in a headlock."

Dave nearly chokes on his spit. He's really glad he's laying on his stomach so you can't see the way he's kind of rubbing against his mattress. it's not on purpose or anything, it's not like he's trying to get off to his best friend (even though he has before. like a lot. like he has to clear his porn search history because it's all descriptors of people who look like you) but when you're going on and on about how wet you'd get from being choked by a guy without realizing he's actually inches away from you... well, what is he supposed to do??

"christ, you can see his whole bulge in this one," you murmur, biting you lip. "I have never wanted to suck someone off so bad."

Dave lets out a choked noise, which you interpret as more playful disgust over your thirsting.

"I'm serious!" you exclaim. "I swear to god, he could keep me barefoot and pregnant and I'd thank him."

Dave's hips have started moving faster on their own as he grinds against his mattress. he knows he shouldn't prod for more details of what you'd do to kickass - to him - he knows you're his best friend and that you'd probably think he was some sick freak if you knew the truth, that he's kickass and he's getting off to you listening to you talk about him like that. Dave loves you, he respects you and admires you and cherishes your friendship so much, so why is feeling guilty and conflicted about about listening to you unintentionally dirty talk like this making it feel so good??

"literally, I would make sure his balls were always empty. like, always." you state.

each word that tumbles out of your mouth makes his blood burn with lust.

"U-uh huh," he chokes out, fighting for his LIFE not to moan in front of you right now.

"just one chance," you sigh, "I just know he's majorly packing. Bet he cums a lot too." you murmur.

you're pouting now. pouting over not being able to taste his cock. the same cock Dave is trying to discreetly jerk off just a few feet away from you. he whines softly, praying you won't notice as you continue to look through photos of him as kickass.

"I don't think I've ever been so down for someone," you whine, throwing your head back and sighing. "okay, you can't tell anyone about this-"

you start seriously.

"but I literally got off thinking about him last night, and I came so hard-"

and if that's not the straw that breaks the camel's back. Dave lets out a strangled, stifled whining moan as his hips rut and stutter against his mattress. his head swims as he cums in his pants, blinded by a raw, pure pleasure.

"O-oh god!" he pants, head spinning as he comes down from his high. his cheeks are flushed, and he can't fucking believe he just did that in front of you. he swallows thickly, terrified - and for some reason, a little thrilled by how you'll react.

you look over at him, eyes locked on him for a moment. it only takes you a second to realize what just happened - your horndog best friend got so turned on from listening to you thirst over kickass that he actually creamed his pants.

"You're so gross," you laugh playfully, throwing a pen at him. "I hope you know how lucky you are that I'm great at keeping secrets." you finish, an unspoken promise that tonight will stay between the two of you.

you turn back to what you're doing, unperturbed by the fact that your best friend just came in his pants from hearing you talk like that, chalking it up to Dave being Dave. this isn't the first time he's gotten hard at an awkward time, but usually he just sneaks off to the bathroom or something to take care of it himself. you had a hunch he might resort to something like this eventually, so you're not too surprised.

"Anyway, what do you think his type is?" you ask, swiveling around Dave's desk chair to look at him. your arms are crossed on the back of the chair, and you lean down on them as you look at him.

"Like, from an objective, guy perspective?"

"U-uh," Dave starts with a soft, nervous laugh, still unable to believe that just happened. "I- I don't know..." he shrugs.

he thinks that's the first time he's lied to you. he knows exactly what kickass's type is, because he's looking right at you.

[growup-thatbeautiful]

Can I get asking gym crush!Dave Lizewski to spot you and needing his help. I think that could spark a beautiful romance

a:n: yes of course!! if anyone wants more of this idea definitely give me any thoughts. college aged dave :)

It's embarrassing. You don't even know his name, and you've never once talked to him. Sometimes he comes in with his friends- two of them- but you haven't caught any information about him besides his frankly impressive workout routine. And it's not like you see him a lot; he comes here way less than you. Yet somehow he seems to be stronger than most other regulars at the gym.

It’s probably for the best that you don’t see him a lot, though. Because when he is there, you find it hard to focus on anything except for him. Everywhere you look he seems to be there in the corner of your eye or in the glimpse of the mirrored wall.

It's unfair, really. No one should be able to look that good while covered in sweat, his curls sticking up in every direction and matted to the back of his neck. The compression shirt that he's wearing is dark with sweat, but his expression doesn't look fazed at all.

Today, though, you're determined for it to be different. You have a few more reps you want to do at the machine, then your plan is to go to the bar and do squats. Then you have your usual cool-down mile and stretching routine. Distractions don't fit into your schedule, especially because you’re already bone-tired today.

You do the last rep, timing your breath in and out to your movement. There's a pleasant, constant tiredness in your legs that you’ve come to love, and the music blasting in your ears pushes you towards your next exercise.

Luckily, the bar is open and you’re able to start your set right away. Maybe it's because you're still a little bit sore from your last leg day, or maybe you're just not feeling it today, but it feels harder than usual. By the third set, your legs are shaking much more than usual and you’re having trouble getting through the reps.

It’s definitely not your smartest decision ever to keep going, but you really don’t to stop early. Some part of you thinks that you can just push through and make it; the reasonable part of you is saying that you’re going to need someone to spot you.

Looking around, you don’t see anyone you know- no friends or friends of a friend. It’s relatively empty for the time of day, but you need to ask someone to spot you.

And in the opposite corner of the gym, there he is. He’s not doing any reps, and from the way he’s checking his phone you don’t think that he’s in the middle of any.

You try to tell yourself that everyone else is busy and he’s the only option, but you know it’s not true. Even if he was busy, you would wait for him to finish and ask him anyways. There’s no telling when you’re going to have another opportunity like this to talk to him- at least you have an excuse to go up to him.

If your legs weren’t already shaking, they are as you walk over towards him. It’s a sin, for him to look at good as he does without really doing anything at all. Your own music blasting through one of your dangling earbuds isn’t enough to calm your nerves. He’s wearing headphones too, so he can’t hear you coming, and he seems immersed in whatever he’s doing, so you stand there awkwardly while he finishes. When he looks up at you, a smile makes its way across his face, and he holds out his hand for you to shake it, not caring about the obvious sweat.

You tell him your name and shake him hand, your stomach doing flips the whole time.

He, in turn, introduces himself. “I’m Dave. Do you need something?” He says it with a pleasant tone, but he must think that he’s been rude because he backtracks immediately. “Shit, that sounded rude, sorry. I just- people don’t usually come up to me.”

“It’s okay,” you assure him with a laugh. “I actually wanted to ask you if you could spot me. I only have a few sets left.”

“Oh, yeah, of course.” He looks genuinely excited at your request, and he dutifully follows you to your rack.

You take a deep breath and look at the weights waiting for you. The soreness in your body seems worse now that he’s there standing behind you, his hands clasped behind his back. When you take another breath, it sounds a lot like a sigh. You’re thrilled that he’s willing to help you, but you don’t want him to think you’re weak.

“Hey, you got this,” he says lowly. “I’ve seen you do this a million times before, it’s just another rep, yeah?”

You don’t have the brainpower to think about him saying he’s seen you do this before because all of your thoughts go to his hand on your back, gently urging your forward towards the bar. He doesn’t say anything more, but the message is received.

You step underneath the bar and stand up straight, the bar’s weight settling into your shoulders. You can’t see Dave behind you, but you can feel the heat of his hands underneath your arms as he supports you.

You breathe in. Go down.

Breathe out. Push yourself up.

Do it again. And again 8 more times before stepping forward to rerack the weights.

When you turn around, Dave is looking up at the ceiling, his hands straight down at his sides. You fix your hair and pause your music before taking a sip of water.

“Dave?” you ask. “You can look at me, you know.”

“I didn’t want you to think that I was checking you out,” he explains while he brings his eyes to yours. “M’not gonna be that guy.”

“I appreciate it,” you respond, your heart warming at the sentiment. “Really, I do. But I wouldn’t mind you looking.” It’s not exactly the most subtle hint you’ve ever given a guy, but something tells you that subtle isn’t the right approach with Dave.

“What?” He really looks clueless as to what you’re talking about, his head tilted to the side. Your brain helpfully supplies you with “puppy dog.”

Too subtle, then. “Do you want to get coffee after this?” You’re positive that your smile is uncertain and crooked.

“Me?” he asks.

“Yes, you,” you laugh. “Look, I know you don’t know me, but I’d like to get to know you.”

“I’d like that, too.” The grin on his face is wide and full, bringing light and laugh lines to his eyes. You haven’t seen this smile from him yet, which is probably a good thing because it has a dangerous effect on you. “You have another set left,” he informs you. “So why don’t we finish that up and go get coffee after?”

“Sounds like a plan,” you agree, stepping back underneath the bar, a renewed vigor in your legs. That vigor, of course, goes away when you actually start the last set.

You do the first five without an issue, but you start struggling more with the sixth. By the eighth rep, you’re face is twisted with effort and you can barely get back up.

Dave doesn’t say anything, but you know he’s there. And his presence is fully reassured to you when he mutters close to your ear, “Come on, just a few more. I’m right here.”

He has to help you with the last rep, his arms supporting you underneath your armpits as he takes some of the weight off and helps you get back the the rack. It forces him much closer to you than before, and you can feel his heart racing against your back. You know yours is beating just as fast.

“Thank you,” you tell him, a little bit out of breath still. “You’re a live-saver.”

A funny look comes across his face at that, but it clears away in a blink. “Anytime.”

“How about that coffee?” you ask, grabbing your keys and water before shooting a quick text to your friends so they know where you’re going. Then, holding out your hand, you say, “It’s the least I can do.”

He takes your hand in between his own, leading you towards his own pile of things. “I know a good place around here.”

“Lead the way,” you tell him.

Maybe asking for his help wasn’t such a bad idea after all.

[baronessvonglitter]

Baby Daddy

best friend's husband!Dave York x married and fertile! f!Reader

Word count: 1.5K

Summary: you and your husband have been trying for a baby, with no success. Then his good friend Dave offers assistance.

(AKA you're on some hormones that make you super horny and Dave pretty much takes advantage of that)

WARNINGS: 18+ Only! Mature and Explicit, slight D/S tones, forced pregnancy (though reader is already trying for a baby), infidelity (Dave and reader), slight sex pollen, reader is late 30s/early 40s but feel free to use your imagination, unprotected piv sex, pregnancy kink, creampie, use of hormones to get pregnant, some talk of infertility

Author's Note: I wrote this for those of us of a certain age who are not often represented in fanfics but as stated above please do use your imagination, there's no gatekeeping here ❤️ Naturally I wrote this while I was ovulating and suuupppeerr feral. I don't want to have any more kids but if Dave was insistent upon it I might just let him 🫢

DAVE YORK MASTERLIST | FULL MASTERLIST

You and your husband's Saturday nights are usually spent with Carol and Dave, your friend from high school and your husband's friend from work, respectively. Mostly you have dinner at your house or theirs, followed with wine and a movie after. Tonight's not any different, except Carol looks at you funny when you politely refuse a glass of pinot grigio.

"Might as well tell them, honey," you husband Jim is all smiles as he addresses the table. "We're trying for a baby," he announces proudly.

You smile but it's masking your discomposure. "Honey I thought we were going to wait until I'm actually pregnant to tell everyone," you say under your breath.

Carol's face is illuminated with joy as she reaches over the dinner table to grab your hand. "That is such wonderful news! Isn't that such good news, babe?" she asks Dave.

Dave eyes both you and your husband, and there’s a mysterious little smile that curves across his lips. “That is great news.”

Jim continues, “She’s on trial pharmaceutical hormones right now, so hopefully it’ll work for us and we’ll be parents soon,” he says excitedly. You manage to be more reserved about it, though your heart rate does speed up when you notice Dave’s eyes on you longer than usual.

After dinner you offer to help tidy up while Jim and Carol start the movie. Really it’s just an excuse to be by yourself for a moment, but then Dave joins you, pouring himself a glass of scotch.

“Are you excited about trying for a baby?” he asks so casually.

In the years you’ve known him, he’s never spoken to you about personal things very often. “Yeah, I am,” you smile at him from the sink.

“How long have you and Jim been.. trying?”

It’s possible this is a normal question coming from a curious friend, but there’s always been something about Dave that gives off the impression that he’s anything but.

“Almost a year,” you answer.

“That’s a long time. Do you try pretty frequently?”

You make a sound of surprise, turning to fully face him. “That’s inappropriate.”

He puts his hands up. “You’re right. I’m sorry.” He approaches you slowly. “I just meant it must be frustrating, putting in all that hard, fun work only to have your hopes dashed when you see blood the very next month.”

You’re rooted to the spot, knowing you should turn to leave and join the others, but it’s also intriguing, the way he speaks to you. “The new hormones are going to be a tremendous help,” you manage to say.

���Hmm. I bet you’re feeling all kinds of new things with these hormones.. even earlier at dinner I could tell.. you’ve got this unmistakable scent coming off you.. you’re probably ripe for someone to put a baby in you right now.” He towers over you, eyes roving your body in its feminine floral dress before his hands follow suit, gently tracing the outline of your curves. “You’d look so hot pregnant.. your hips getting wider, breasts getting bigger.. and it all starts with this.,” his hand sneaks under your skirt, skims along your inner thigh and finds your heat, evident through your cotton panties. “If your husband isn’t doing the job, why don’t I step in?”

“Dave,” you whisper, “Carol’s my best friend. I can’t..” but it feels too good and damn it he’s right: the hormones have given your libido a big boost. You take his hand and guide his fingers into your slick center. You both gasp quietly as he starts to stroke you with two fingers, then three when he sees you can take it. His lips trace delicately over your neck, just above your pulse point. Jesus, if his fingers fill you up this good, just imagine what he can do with that cock. “Fuck me,” you whisper.

“Are you sure?” His eyes are dark but there’s a kind of mirth there.

“Shut up Dave, just take me home.”

After making your excuse to Carol and Jim that you’re feeling unwell, Dave “offers” to walk you home, which is how you end up across the street, upstairs in the room you share with your husband. He’s relentless as he kisses you with soft mouth and playful tongue. You fumble together towards the bed, working in tandem to get each other's clothes off as quickly as possible. There's urgency in everything you do, even your breathing is heavy and erratic. Your dress goes over your head; you pull off his shirt and unbuckle his belt. Layers are pulled away until skin meets skin and at last he pulls your panties off, smirking to find them absolutely soaked. You lean over the bed, looking over your shoulder at him.

"Is this how Jim usually likes it?" Dave asks, running his hand admiringly over the curve of your ass.

You blush at the sudden random evaluation of your married sex life. "Well.. yes.."

Dave shakes his head, a little smile forming on his lips as he turns you around and lays you across the bed. "I want to see the look on your face when you cum." With that, he slides into you, relishing your expression as he fills you completely. Your legs wrap around his hips and your arms wrap around his neck, all while your bodies move in perfect harmony. "He doesn't fuck you very often, does he?" Dave whispers in your ear, sending tingles down your spine. "I can tell, the way your pussy is gripping me so tight, like you haven't been fucked in weeks.."

You start a smart comeback but it's impossible to think when he's moving against you like he's fucked you hundreds of times before. Jesus, no wonder Carol's always happy. Her husband's well-endowed and knows how to use it.

The sounds of your combined moans becomes rhythmic, Dave's body strong and powerful yet gentle with you. The bedsprings creak beneath your weight, skin smacks on skin, hands grab everywhere they can, lips meet heated flesh, words of lust become sighs and half-uttered phrases. When you come you clench around him, fingernails digging into his skin as a great wave of pleasure and relief flows through you and you cry out. Dave's eyes are on you, barely registering the slight pain of your nails in his back, feeling how you milk him with your greedy little pussy, and his body tenses against yours, his movements become faster and faster as he fucks you during your orgasm. You barely have time to come down before he starts you up again. You moan "Yes!" over and over, hips meeting every one of his frenzied thrusts. Dave looks smug and self-righteous watching you come for the second time. It's not until you feel him swell and pulse inside you that you panic. "Dave, don't!..." but it's too late. You feel several warm bursts when he presses deep against you. To your shock your body reacts eagerly, milking his cock for every drop he has to give. All this happens with your gaze locked on one another's, and as you pale with the realization of what you've just done, Dave only smirks and pushes forward one more time.

You gasp. "Dave, you weren't supposed to-"

"Quiet now. Lay still and keep your hips elevated. Wouldn't want all my hard work to go to waste." He disengages from you, taking a moment to watch his seed spilling out of you and he gently presses it back in. "Not a drop," he says, and gets up to get dressed.

Still in shock, you do as he says, body still reeling from the aftermath of the intense fucking he's just given you. "Don't.. don't tell Jim about this. Or Carol." A massive wave of guilt washes over you knowing you've been unfaithful to your husband and to your oldest, best friend.

"I won't say a word," Dave promises. "I have no doubt Carol would hate you forever and Jim.. well, Jim would be heartbroken. He's not exactly a fighter," he smirks. "And I'll tell you something else." He sits next to you on the bed, admiring the messy state of your hair, your flushed skin. "Jim's a good guy and a good friend. He deserves better than a wife who betrays him like this."

Anger replaces your trepidation and you push him away. "You're an asshole. Get out!"

He looks amused by all this, rather than shamed or defeated as a normal person would. "I'll be seeing you around, sweetheart. We're friends with each other's spouses. It's inevitable." He leans towards you and brushes his thumb against your cheek. "If this time doesn't take - which I doubt it won't - I'm happy to help out again."

Twelve weeks later Jim makes the happy announcement that you're expecting, after having tried for so long you've finally received a miracle. You manage to look contented and cheerful as your friends and family gather to celebrate the amazing news. Carol dotes over you, making sure you don't strain yourself for the baby's sake. You meet eyes with Dave, who's across the room watching you, a brazen little smirk on his face. He lifts his brow as if to ask the question you know he wants to ask, and all you can do is give a little nod.

divider by @enchanthings 👑

[luveline]

first of all, congratulations on 40k! ur so very talented and all of ur stories r so amazing!

𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐧𝐟𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐥𝐮𝐞 + 𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐛𝐨𝐲𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝'𝐬 𝐨𝐤

can i request fat!reader with hotch? maybe the reader is super anxious about meeting the rest of the team (maybe she’s already met rossi or spence or somebody) because shes worried that they’ll think she isn’t good enough for aaron so they push off them meeting for a while but then aaron gets shot (like in the shoulder or something, nothing major) and the doctors call her bc she’s on his emergency contact?

tysm babe!

There are people crowding Aaron's hospital bed. You can name them all from the photos you've seen alone; Morgan, muscled, his skin a deep sable; Reid, startlingly pale and with hair to his shoulders; and Rossi, or Dave, an older member of the team standing by the door. 

Knowing them by looks isn't going to make this easier. Maybe because you know that how you look is the very first thing any of them will notice. You aren't like Aaron's previous partners, but you're here, and you'd really like to see him. 

"Hello?" you ask, elbowing open the door.

Aaron looks up, sees it's you with a furrowed brow. "Did someone call you?" 

Which is honestly the worst thing he could say. You know you don't look like anything special, but when you get a call from the hospital that your boyfriend's been shot in the shoulder, you rush. "I'm your emergency contact?" you say, unsure. 

He frowns. "I didn't want them to call you and scare you. I'm fine."

"If there's ever a time for understating things, now isn't it," says Rossi, extending a hand to you. "David Rossi, nice to meet you."

You smile though acid twists in your stomach. "Hello." 

"Derek Morgan," Derek says, offering his swiftly after. 

"I'm Spencer, but I don't shake," Spencer says.

It's just as well. You don't have much patience left for shaking hands, easing past the men and their welcoming smiles to your grey boyfriend. You hesitate for a moment before giving in and touching his face. "I really would like to be called, you know, in the future." You kiss his cheek. "Even if it's scary." 

"Sorry you had to introduce yourself," he says under his breath. 

"Where's Emily?" you ask. You already know Emily, and she'd been so nice to you, you almost wish you'd met her outside of Aaron so that you could be friends. 

"Fighting a losing battle with the coffee machine," Rossi says. 

You straighten up and hold your hands behind your back. Then, self-conscious, you fold them in front of you. You know what you look like and don't usually worry when you're with the people who love you, but meeting new people brings old wounds to light. What are they thinking? you wonder. Do they think Aaron's settling? And that you're the wrong girl for him? 

"I can see why Hotch hasn't introduced us sooner," Derek says. Your heart plummets through your stomach, but he winks and smiles, continuing, "He'd have competition." 

(You can't know this, but they've all noticed your insecure shifting. Hotch wouldn't usually love such blatant flirtation between you and another man, but this instance gets a pass.)

"You can all go home now," Aaron says, reaching for you with the hand that isn't forcibly incapacitated. 

"Aw, boss," Emily says, elbowing open the door with a blonde behind her, "what fun would that be?" She sees you standing by the monitors and grins. "Hey! I wish we were seeing each other again under different circumstances, but it's so good to see you, oh my god!"

Aaron nudges you forward secretly, his fingers at the small of your back. You step forward without more instruction to give Emily a hug. Over her shoulder, the blonde girl smiles. It's an acute relief that she's not skinny, either. 

"Hey, mama, you get anything for me?" Derek asks her. 

"I did, but now this beauty is here, you'll have to wait! Hi, I'm Penelope." 

She's exceedingly eager to hug you as Emily had. 

(Hotch doesn't even care that his shoulder feels like someone poured hot casting iron in the wound, or that he'd really like for you to be hugging him right now rather than Garcia. It's nice to see something he knew was worrying you go smoothly. Nicer still to receive the smile you shoot back over your shoulder as JJ opens the door and his room becomes somehow more overcrowded. 

"She's just as cute as you said," Dave says with an approving nod. "You've still got it, Aaron. There's hope for all us old timers yet."

Hotch had called you cute, but you're a hell of a lot more than that. Definitely still got it, he thinks.) 

[thewertsearch]

TT: I should have gone looking for her. TT: Why didn't I? [...] GG: because you were busy trying to make the best of this situation? TT: John was too. But he went to look for his father. [...] GG: john was being john, and you were being you, which i guess meant taking our problems very seriously and putting all your attention on solving them! GG: and anyway, you and your mom had a much trickier relationship than john and his dad didnt you?

I'm with Jade on this. Presumably, Rose decided that analyzing the game was a more productive use of her time than searching for Mom - a lady who, let's not forget, deliberately abandoned her. Can you really blame her for avoiding the woman?

For a thirteen-year-old, Rose's tactical calls have actually been pretty good. The problem is that Scratch keeps redirecting her plans in directions that benefit him.

GG: now we have all lost guardians GG: dave lost his, and i lost mine in a weird way… uuum even though that was pretty much definitely my fault :\ GG: and even the trolls all lost their monster guardians GG: i think that maybe it is an inevitable part of a game that can be cruel sometimes

I didn’t want this to come to pass, but it always seemed somewhat inevitable.

After all, says Skaia, how are you going to focus on creating a new world, if we don't cut all ties to your old one?

TT: For some reason, despite all the danger, I never thought she was in any trouble. TT: I never believed she would actually die. […] TT: I didn't actually need the ectobiological verification that she was like a mother and a sister at the same time. I always understood that somehow. TT: And I felt she had knowledge and ability beyond what she let on. It was always intimidating, but nonetheless a source of respect which was childishly begrudging on my part.

She worked directly for Skaianet. I'm sure she knew exactly what was coming - and honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if her foresight included her own fate. Prophecy is abundant in this world, and her boss was time-traveling through the session before it even existed.

But... think about this for a second, Rose. If your mother knew everything that awaited you, then it's actually a really good sign that she's been helping you from behind the scenes.

Because if things were truly hopeless, then why was she out there killing monsters for you?

What would be the point, if there was no light at the end of the tunnel?

I'm just saying - that's not the punch of a woman with no hope.

GG: i just hope you arent thinking of doing something rash TT: I already was. TT: I was going to go to sleep, fly to a sun bigger than our universe, drop a bomb in it, and kill myself. […] TT: So if my course of action is to change on account of my mood, it can only become less impetuous, don't you think?

...I’m willing to hear you out.

TT: You never liked my plan very much anyway. […] TT: I made it without a full understanding of the nature of the Scratch. […] TT: Maybe I will go kill Jack myself. TT: Right now.

Oh, man.

Ohhhh, man.

Look. Rose. I'm loving how proactive you're being here, but this plan will kill you instantly - and even if you're dream-revived, you'll die for good when you deliver the Tumor.

Is this what causes the Blackout, then? Is Rose about to power up for this fight, overwhelming the session with eldritch energy?

This fucking guy -_-