#you'd be surprised how little i remember from math class. you'd be really surprised

[thebirdandhersong]

Khan Academy, my friend, please teach me geometry again

[leeknow-thoughts]

HE ONLY DATES PRETTY GIRLS

౨ৎ pairing : hwang hyunjin x FEM!reader

౨ৎ warnings : smut (not many details), fluff, college!au

౨ৎ a/n : kinda clearing out my drafts rn lol

It was an embarrassing realization, when you figured out you had fallen in love with him. He was out of your reach, and you knew it. Oh, how you know it.

"He only dates pretty girls," all of his friends seemed to say.

As if they themselves were reminding you of your place.

He was smart, he just needed math tutoring. Every Tuesday and Friday you'd go over to his frat house to help him with trigonometry. Every time you came over you'd learn something new about him. Every time he would also learn something new about you.

Last week you both had done less math and more talking. Speaking of everything from music to exams to shoes.

He was handsome. Even a blind man could see his beauty, because his beauty wasn't limited to that of his looks. He was beautiful in his voice, in his passion, in his kindness.

His presence was beautiful as well. Even if it were fleeting. Every moment with him felt fleeting. As soft as a feather but as heavy as a brick.

You find yourself at one of his parties. Sitting on his fraternity's couch, sweaty bodies surrounding you. "There you are! I can't believe you came!" you heard his voice in front of you.

When you looked up you saw him. He looked beautiful, as always, wearing simple blue jeans and a black tank top. Yet, he looked elegant.

"Uhm yeah of course! Thanks for inviting me!" you try and speak loud enough so that you can hear the words leaving your mouth over the music.

"Wanna come back to my room? It's a little loud here," he inquires.

Of course you obliged. He held your arm as he guided you through the hallways of the house. Up the stairwell and the first door on the left. His room was so, him.

It was clean and tidy. "Bet you have a lot of girls up here," the thought slips your mind before you can stop it from leaving your mouth.

He scoffs with fake offense, "is that what you think of me?"

You shrug, he takes a seat on the bed, patting the space beside him. He wants you to sit next to him. "I mean you only date pretty girls," you chuckle.

His face breaks in surprise, "did Jisung tell you that?"

You nod, remembering how the boy told you such after you informed him that Hyunjin was the one to invite you. "Well is it true?" you ask him lightly swinging your feet back and forth over the bed.

"I only date girls I find pretty," he responds genuinely, "I like girls that are smart and funny and that don't often go out to parties. I like girls that are kind, and that are good at math, those are the ones I find really pretty," he hums.

"Mhm," you pause, "do you like one of the girls in our math class?"

"Oh," his pitch falls, "no, I was talking about you, but yeah you're also in our math class so yeah."

All thoughts leave your head in that instant, "you think I'm pretty?"

"Why do you think it's impossible that I think you're pretty?" he questions.

"You're you," you point to him, "and I'm me," you point back to yourself.

"And you're perfect!" he exclaims.

A wave of silence washes over the room, nothing can be heard other than the beat of your heart. It felt like watching yourself stub your toe but wait those few seconds for the pain to kick in. But the pain never came. Maybe it didn't have to hurt the way you expected it would. Maybe it never would have hurt the way that you thought you knew it would.

And before you can think, before you can speak, his lips are on yours and your faces are inches apart and he's kissing you. He tastes like cherries and tequila he must've had earlier. He's kissing you. Hyunjin is kissing you. He's kissi-

"Why?" you sigh against his lips, not daring to fully part with him.

"Because I need you, I want you, please," he mumbles against your chapped lips.

You can't help but smile against his lips when he says that, "you want me?"

"Fuck yes," he mutters against your lips before pulling you into another sloppy kiss, "I fucking need you. I've needed you for so long."

You don't know where you find the confidence to say, "then take me."

And it doesn't hurt when he bottoms out inside you. Your bodies cling to each other, afraid of the emptiness without each other. Your hands gently trace down his stomach. Each of his thrusts send you closer and closer to the edge, you cling to him when you tumble over it. And it is oh, so perfect.

[lowkeyrobin]

Jock!reader who's like really nice to everyone and has a crush on Ethan and tries to flirt with him while Ethan is tutoring him and FAILS MISERABLY and Ethan just thinks it the most adorable thing ever ahhhh plss🙏

- ♣️

YES YES YES HELLO ♣️ ANON!!! welcome my third child 🙏🙏🙏🙏 literallt love u sm thank you for this pookie

ETHAN MORGAN ; flirty jock and flustered geek

summary ; jock!reader who has a crush on ethan and fails successfully to flirt with him

warnings ; language, cheesey stuff lol, reader is described as a basketball player but can totally be changed, this also isn't that great tbh

word count ; 1k

masterlist

You rest your letterman jacket on the back of the chair you sit on, being greeted by Ethan. He opens his binder to the homework in the Geometry packet, and you do the same, mentally preparing yourself. You notice his white binder is covered in stickers and some reference to vampires, witches, the supernatural, and beyond. Ethan was kind of your friend, you were more than acquaintances but you didn't talk outside of Geometry and English class.

You were one of the very few nice people on the basketball team, or maybe you were just a decent person and didn't judge people all too quickly. Otherwise, you didn't mind needing the tutoring from Ethan, you appreciated it really, if you failed another test you could be at risk for getting kicked off the team and you might lose the opportunity for a scholarship to college.

"Okay, so, what exactly do you need help with?" The brunette asks, looking up at you as he runs a hand through his hair, looking a little nervous.

"I just don't know how to like, figure out what shape they are like, how Mr. D wants us to, and like how to find the second base or the height" You explain, "Like, I know how I just can't remember the like, equations, I guess. And when I do, I get the math wrong"

He nods, "Okay, so, you know how to find the areas and perimeters well enough, though, right?"

You nod.

As he begins to explain how to solve your problems, you notice his orange t-shirt, accentuating the perfectly placed blush on his cheeks, faint but definitely pink. The way he spoke to dumb it down for you a bit but to not infantilize you made you smile a bit, seeing as he cared about your feelings. You notice him rub the nape of his neck, seemingly anxious or nervous around you, or maybe uncomfortable because he didn't know how to teach, like how Mr. D should be teaching you this and not poor Ethan, wasting his study hall for you.

You were already very, very aware of your crush on Ethan Morgan. He was your every thought, he was in your blood, in your ears, in your eyes, and in your tears. (weezer reference)

But, now was not the time to dilly dally about with high school crushes, these next 35 minutes could potentially determine your entire future. You needed this free ride to college, otherwise you'd turn into another old person working a job that pays minimum wage for maximum effort.

As time lugged on, you couldn't help but not focus on your homework and instead focus on Ethan and his gorgeous face. He looks back up at you after asking a question, seeing you were totally zoned out staring at him.

"Y/n?" He waves a hand in front of your eyes, trying to snap you back to reality. (eminem reference, wow I'm on a roll today)

You blink, "Oh, shit, sorry, uh, what'd you say, pretty boy?"

You couldn't even think about the words spilling out of your mouth until after they already fell. Those words hit Ethan like a falling anvil, his face turning bright red as he tries to shrug it off as you were just surprised and trying to be nice to him.

"Uh, this is the equation, uhm, try solving it"

You awkwardly nod, writing down the equation and putting in the numbers with the respective variables. You solve the equation, ending up with 24 for the height. He looks confused, having got a different answer. He scooches over to you, trying to figure out where you went wrong.

"Y'know, you're like a walking calculator. A cute one though" You shrug, he looks at you with a slightly confused and amused face, "I dunno what that even means, sorry"

He nods, "Oh, okay, you I think multiplied by two instead of dividing"

"Oh, whoops" You pick your pencil back up, fixing your mistake.

"There you go!" Ethan smiles, "It's just little mistakes, you'll build on it" He lightly pats your shoulder.

"Did you know Ancient Romans used to brush their teeth with their urine? And it actually worked?" You randomly ask him, fidgeting with your pencil.

Ethan blinks, slightly confused before he lightly laughs. "I hate you, focus on the Geometry, no stalling"

"Do you hate me or are we about to kiss right now?"

"Dude. Did you get that off Pinterest or something?"

"...Yeah"

He hides a laugh and bites his lip, "Okay so you-"

"Damn, are you Terms and Conditions? Cause I'd love to blindly agree to whatever you say"

Ethan quickly covers his mouth, "Shut up!"

You laugh a bit, "Sorry, sorry. I didn't sleep for shit last night and I'm getting frustrated cause I don't understand this"

"You'll learn!" Ethan smiles, shaking you lightly by the shoulders.

Some time later, the bell is about to ring, dismissing you to lunch.

"Thanks Eth" You lightly smile, "Oh, uh-" You reach into your backpack, pulling out some homemade cookies in a plastic Tupperware, handing them to him. "These are for you. I have to go to lunch in a second" You say, pulling your backpack over your shoulders, carrying your binder and pencil in hand.

"Oh- thank you!" He smiles, watching you stand up. The smile falters a bit due to awkwardness, "Uh- I have lunch next period too-"

"Bye Ethan, see you later! Love you, dude!"

Ethan is left confused and slightly shocked, cheeks a little red.

He knew you had a crush on him, he felt the same way, but he loved seeing you miserably fail to flirt with him. You were no romantic, if anything, a hopeless romantic in your thoughts.

He smiles, looking down at the red-lid Tupperware, seeing soft, chocolate chip cookies inside, his favorite.

"Thanks, Y/n," He whispers with a little smile, then gathers up his binder and books, shoving them in his backpack.

He notices a tingling feeling in his face, feeling a familiar warmth on his face as he thought about the nicknames and dumb pickup lines you'd spilled out of your lips that past half hour. God, would he love to kiss those lips of yours. He sighs, realizing he should definitely let you do that some more before he asks about it at all.

Thankfully, he'd been able to have slipped a note into your binder before you left.

"Hey Y/n! If you need any help tomorrow I'll be in the library. Bring your pickup lines with you, and I might help you not get kicked off the team. -Ethan"

[jellijellybean]

thinking bout corrupting older men tonite lads. river is my example and I wish so deeply there was a lewd event for him, the way i'd actually go feral.

[warning: unethical student/teacher relations but doesn't go too much into detail. uhm. religion? mention? dunno if that needs a tag.]

anyway, river's always been told from the moment he first remembers that lust was the most dangerous sin of them all. the church stated that those who fall into such a temptation should be punished, so river being river swore off any feelings that might evolve into such a horror.

now, imagine you begin cozying up to him in class, doing the typical school things like showing up on time, passing your tests with flying colors, and doing your best to not get in any trouble. maybe he takes a liking to you, he doesn't really think too much about any of his students, but he's seen the way whitney will attempt to undress you only for you to fight back.

he's seen the way you're just so focused in his class – minus the times he catches you chatting with your classmates – he's even seen the way you worked so hard in order to pass his math project.

you're a hard worker and even more — an amazing student, it's not his fault he begins to grow fond of you and not in any less than pure way. (it's not like he has to press the cool metal of his holy pendant against his skin when you walk a little too close to him as a reminder of what might happen should his feelings grow.)

yet, that fondness only does grow when you begin to show up at the soup kitchen. he thinks you're there to get something to eat, but he's surprised to find that you'd be volunteering. to say the least, he's touched.

river doesn't see any reason to not appreciate your work, so he compliments your ethics and for the first time, he sees you smile brightly — and that's just the beginning.

slowly, his affection grows even more when he sees you step into his classroom or when you make your way to the soup kitchen. he doesn't mention anything if you're a bit late, it's not like it happens all the time anyway. he doesn't think too much when he's looking for someone to call on and you're the only one to catch his eye. he won't say anything when he sees your uniform isn't exactly up to standards, you might have missed laundry day, no big deal. he won't even say anything when whitney finally succeeds in removing your shirt, just bashfully looks at the ground before ordering whitney out.

maybe it's his fault he's grown a bit soft, but it isn't causing any real harm now is it? maybe it's his fault you begin to think he's a pushover, maybe it's his fault he's stuck in this position, with your hand unbuttoning his shirt as you pepper kisses against his neck and maybe it is his fault he let those feelings of lust grow.

his classroom feels too warm, each press of your lips against his skin has a wave of something new washing over him. his shaky hands try to gently push your shoulders away while his mouth tries to form a word or multiple, ask what you're doing, but his throat feels dry and your kisses are getting lower and harsher. the groan he releases when your teeth sink into his neck is involuntary.

everything feels slow, but there's this feeling growing in his stomach, winding up like a bomb with every ghost of your lips, with every touch of your hands, hell, even the way your body seems to warm him up has his mind growing hazy. it's overwhelming… but at the same time, he feels like it's not enough. his deep blue eyes slowly reveal themselves when your mouth pulls away from his skin. it's almost painful how much it seems to upset his body, but whatever you are doing, he wants more.

you smile at him, that same bright smile he can't say no to, not when you asked if he could help with your assignments and definitely not when you began to slide your hand across his chest.

river licks his lips, his heart feels like it's going to jump out of his chest and into your waiting palms. this feeling you've brought over him makes him feel something akin to insane. he wants whatever this is, whatever he feels when you press your lips to his and take what's rightfully yours. he wants to know the way your skin would feel against his, he wants to know if you're drowning in this sensation, this lust, as much as he is.

[cyberstudious]

what's it like studying CS?? im pretty confused if i should choose CS as my major xx

hi there!

first, two "misconceptions" or maybe somewhat surprising things that I think are worth mentioning:

there really isn't that much "math" in the calculus/arithmetic sense*. I mostly remember doing lots of proofs. don't let not being a math wiz stop you from majoring in CS if you like CS

you can get by with surprisingly little programming - yeah you'll have programming assignments, but a degree program will teach you the theory and concepts for the most part (this is where universities will differ on the scale of theory vs. practice, but you'll always get a mix of both and it's important to learn both!)

*: there are some sub-fields where you actually do a Lot of math - machine learning and graphics programming will have you doing a lot of linear algebra, and I'm sure that there are plenty more that I don't remember at the moment. the point is that 1) if you're a bit afraid of math that's fine, you can still thrive in a CS degree but 2) if you love math or are willing to be brave there are a lot of cool things you can do!

I think the best way to get a good sense of what a major is like is to check out a sample degree plan from a university you're considering! here are some of the basic kinds of classes you'd be taking:

basic programming courses: you'll knock these out in your first year - once you know how to code and you have an in-depth understanding of the concepts, you now have a mental framework for the rest of your degree. and also once you learn one programming language, it's pretty easy to pick up another one, and you'll probably work in a handful of different languages throughout your degree.

discrete math/math for computer science courses: more courses that you'll take early on - this is mostly logic and learning to write proofs, and towards the end it just kind of becomes a bunch of semi-related math concepts that are useful in computing & problem solving. oh also I had to take a stats for CS course & a linear algebra course. oh and also calculus but that was mostly a university core requirement thing, I literally never really used it in my CS classes lol

data structures & algorithms: these are the big boys. stacks, queues, linked lists, trees, graphs, sorting algorithms, more complicated algorithms… if you're interviewing for a programming job, they will ask you data structures & algorithms questions. also this is where you learn to write smart, efficient code and solve problems. also this is where you learn which problems are proven to be unsolvable (or at least unsolvable in a reasonable amount of time) so you don't waste your time lol

courses on specific topics: operating systems, Linux/UNIX, circuits, databases, compilers, software engineering/design patterns, automata theory… some of these will be required, and then you'll get to pick some depending on what your interests are! I took cybersecurity-related courses but there really are so many different options!

In general I think CS is a really cool major that you can do a lot with. I realize this was pretty vague, so if you have any more questions feel free to send them my way! also I'm happy to talk more about specific classes/topics or if you just want an answer to "wtf is automata theory" lol

[robinismywifee]

Back to the Old House - Chapter 6:

September 4th, 2034

[4 days after last chapter]

Raines age: 16 years, 6 months

Ellies age: 15 years, 3 months

CW: Struggling with eating, anxiety

Words: 3046

Masterlist

[Comment if you want to be added to taglist]

Raines POV:

As I got dressed for the first day of school, I couldn't stop thinking about Cat.

Jesse seemed like he wasn't close with her and their interactions were kind of awkward, but they probably were a lot more awkward because I was just silently standing there. And who was Cat talking about when she said 'we are all gonna watch a movie' and invited Jesse to come? Would Ellie be there? Or was it a separate friend group? Since Cat mentioned that Dina would be there, maybe it was just Dinas girl friends and Jesse would join them, which is why he was so awkward?

Yeah, theres no way Jesse would be friends with Ellie. I would have seen them talking or he would have mentioned her by now. Yeah, definitely no way, he loves to talk about his friends and I would remember if he mentioned Ellie.

Also, I really hoped that Cat didn't tell anyone about the whole, me-calling-Ellie-that-word thing. Fortunately, I don't think she did since Jesse never mentioned it and didn't treat me any different after that day.

I had eaten breakfast with Maria and Tommy earlier this morning but they had to leave early since today was a busy day. Point is, it was an empty house. So when I finished tying my shoes and heard a knock at the door, I was confused.

I quickly grabbed my bag and left my room, once I made it to the front door, I peaked through the little hole. Fuck, it's actually for me.

I took a deep breath in, and opend the door, "Hey Raine, I figured you'd not wanna walk alone, and it'd be easier if we all walked together" Jesse smiled, glancing over to his girlfriend, since him and Dina got back together at that hangout Cat had invited him to.

"Hey, I don't know if you remember, but i'm Dina" she said with a shy smile, probably nervous of how I was gonna react this time.

I nodded, "Yeah, i'm sorry for.. how I acted last time I saw you. I'm not good at meeting new people." I said, fidgeting with my hands, I had practiced for this moment along with meeting other students and teachers.

Dina smiled genuinely, "It's okay, I get it, it must be stressful for you" I smiled back, unsure of how to reply.

"Knew you'd two would get along sooner or later! Now c'mon, we're gonna be late!" Jesse interrupted, which I silently thanked because it would have gotten awkward, real fast.

As we walked, I talked more with Dina. She actually wasn't bad, and was pretty great. I can see why Jesse likes her.

Once we got to the school building, I realized how much I was talking with Dina, it surprised me that I wasn't struggling too much with talking to her. She kept it chill, while Jesse would add in crazy or random things.

I followed them to the third floor of the building, "First class! Math. Kinda boring" Dina mumbled, as we entered the room.

There was about 15 other kids seated, all around my age. Dina dragged me by my arm to one of the tables, "Wow, if I knew you were gonna steal my girlfriend I wouldn't have introduced you two." Jesss sarcastically mumbled.

All the Tables sat 2 people each. and were pushed together into 3 horizontal rows. We sat in the row furthest from the front of the room, I sat in the first table on the left side, in the right chair of the table alone, with Dina sitting next to me in the other table, then Jesse next to Dina. Nobody else was in the row with us.

The teachers desk was in the front of the room in the right corner, she sat with a smile on her face, chatting with some teenagers that were in the front row, she seemed in her mid 30s.

More and more students came in and sat down, except I didn't pay much attention to them since me, Dina, and Jesse were busy chatting about our favorite foods, and what we hadn't had but wanted to try. I did more listening then chatting. Jesse really wanted apple pie.

Someone sat down next to Jesse which made him leave the conversation to chat to instead, I didn't really look to see who it was as I was daydreaming about the meal Dina was describing that her mom used to make.

"And she would melt the cheese and add herbs to it-"

A voice cut my train of thought off. Annoying and high pitchhed. I turned to where it came from, only to see her and her stupid short black hair. But what caught my attention was the girl that sat to the right of her.

My heart sped up and my eyes widened.

How the fuck did I not even think about that chances of her being here?

She sat looking down at her lap, playing with her hands, and leg bobbing up and down. Her stupid girlfriend was faced the complete opposite of her to talk to Jesse, that she didn't even notice her poor, anxious, girlfriend.

I could feel my heart starting to pump, when the loud, chatting, class got shushed by the teachers loud voice.

"Good morning everyone!" She cheered, with a big smile. Everyone stopped their conversations to turn to her, replying back with different variations.

"I am so ready to be back, I missed you all so much"

This is already a trillion times better then dumb QZ school. She was smiling, greeting the class in a nice manner, saying she missed her students? This all felt so foreign.

"We have some new students, so welcome welcome, i'll be your teacher for the rest of the year for a few different subjects! I'm Miss Collins"

The teacher then took attendance, I felt my heart speed up when I heard Ellie mumble a quiet, 'here'.

It reminded me of back at the QZ when my heart would speed up from it too. I didn't like the feeling.

Miss Collins didn't really teach anything today, it was just kinda her going over what we were going to learn starting tomorrow, and the subjects she teached; math, science, health.

Then, right as Miss Collins finished explaining where we went after lunch, the bell went off. She had earlier explained how the bell worked just in case people didn't already know.

Everyone stood up and began to leave, it was overwhelming the amount of people there was. Even though I knew I was safe, I felt endangered.

"Hey, you okay?" Jesse asked, "Oh, yeah, i'm fine. Lets go" I quickly replied, he nodded, knowing I wasn't, but didn't push any further.

Cat and Ellie had already left and was infront of us everyone walked down the halls, Dina was holding Jesses hand and had her hand on my shoulder so we wouldn't get lost in the crowd.

Once we made it to the cafeteria, everyone sat down at random tables with their friends. The cafeteria just had random placement of tables and in the corner there was a place were you could get food.

Dina took us to a table in the corner since it was the only good spot left, I spotted Cat and Ellie only 2 tables away.

Once we all sat down, I noticed that I had the perfect view of Ellie. Fuck.

"Did you bring a lunch Raine?"

I nodded my head, Maria had packed me a lunch, "Yeah, but.. i'm not really hungry"

"Oh, big breakfast?" Dina asked, I nodded, picking at my nails. Little bit more then half a scrambled egg? Hudge breakfast.

"Well, i'm gonna go get my lunch since I didn't pack any. I'll be right back!" Dina said happily, getting up and making her way over to the food stand.

"So, whattya think?" Jesse asked, looking like an idiot as he did jazz hands.

"Huh?" I asked confused, he sighed, putting down his hands, "About school so far! Duh!"

"Oh.. I mean we don't get to learn anything till tomorrow.. so, I dunno" I replied, watching as he took out his bagged lunch, dumping it out on the table.

"True, but, what do you think about what you've experienced so far?" he questioned, unraveling his sandwich.

"Uh.."

To be honest I just spent the whole 'experience' thinking about Ellie or watching her from my peripheral vision..

"It's okay so far."

Jesse finished swallowing his food before nodding, "Yeah, okay, that isn't a negative answer, i'll take it!"

Dina then came back with her school food, which looked to be a really sad sandwich with barley any meat in it, and grapes.

"So, are you excited for your art class next period?" Dina asked, popping a grape in her mouth. Next period was all the 'extra' classes that you signed up for; gym, art, or medical. If you didn't wanna do any of those, then you go down a floor and help with the daycare.

I smiled slightly, "Yeah i'm actually excited for that"

"It should be fun, everybody I know whos taken it loved it. Plus everyone says the teachers nice"

"Whos the teacher?"

"Oh, it's the same girl that works at the library, everybody calls her Mrs R, her last name is hard to pronounce. I've met her a few times though, she's super artsy and cool!" Dina explained,

I nodded, excitement building up in me.

"Hey you sure you're not hungry?" Jesse randomly asked, "Yeah, like I said, big breakfast." I nodded.

Dina and Jesse started to tell a story of how Jesse tried to become a bird a few winters ago- or some weird shit like that, but the whole time, I was staring at the girl a few meters infront of me, zoning out on her. She was so close that I could faintly make out her and Cats conversation- well at least whenever Jesse didn't yap in my ear.

"Can't you just pretend like that never happened?"

Ellie said, a frustrated look on her face, eye brows scrunched and eyes squinted. Cats annoying voice spoke back-

"Why are you defending her! Shes an asshole!"

"You don't fucking know her!"

"I know enough!"

Ellie rolled her eyes, and went to stand up, but Cats hand grabbed tightly on her wrist, pulling her back down,

"Cat, let go."

I watched as Cat shook her head no,

"Come on Ellie just sit back down, I'm sorry I yelled, I don't wanna argue"

Cat sounded like she was gonna cry,

"Cat, just let go."

I heard Cat talk but couldn't make out words, it sounded like she was pleading to Ellie, and then, Ellie ripped her hand away from Cats grip, She took her bag and left.

The exit happened to be right behind me and the table I sat at, so Ellie had to go in my direction.

As Ellie sped walked with her head down, she glanced up and instantly made eye contact with me. I was stuck in the trance and didn't look away.

As Ellie stared back at me, I could see her watery eyes, she then quickly moved her head back down and moved her eyes to the floor. I noticed a tear run down her cheek.

As she sped walked out of the cafeteria, I glanced at Cat to see her death staring me. She gave me one last look that could kill, and then turned away.

I look behind me at the exist. I then remember what Maria packed me: a chicken sandwich.

I don't know what type of food Ellie does or doesn't like, but who doesn't like chicken? Plus Maria told me that I got lucky staying with her since she has first dibs on the good food, so Ellie probably doesn't have chicken just laying around in her fridge, and it's definitely a step up from the cafeteria food that she was not even eating.

I glanced between Jesse and Dina who were cought up in a playful argument. I grabbed my backpack off the ground, swinging it over my arms, made sure Cat or anybody wasn't looking, and left.

I didn't even realize what I was doing when I made it to the bathroom. It wasn't until I opened the door and our eyes already contected. Blue meeting green.

My heart sped up, Why the fuck am I doing this?

I started silently freaking out, the door making a loud noise shutting behind me jolted me out of my trance.

Ellie was now looking away. Anywhere but me. Her face was red and many tears were staining her cheeks.

I gulped, I guess since i'm already here i'll just do what I came for. and moved my backpack off my shoulder, so it was on one of my shoulders and infront of me. I unzipped it and opened the paper bag that was still in my backpack. I pulled out the wrapped sandwich, along with a napkin. I zipped my bag with one hand, and put it over both my shoulders again.

Ellie was watching me with scrunched brows confused. I slowly stepped over to her till she was at arms length, and reached out to her, with the sandwich in hand, motioning for her to grab it.

She hesitantly reached her hand out, "I- Is this posion?" she asked in a voice that you could hear she had been crying.

I shook my head no, and moved closer to her waiting for her to take it, "Its' chicken" I mumbled in a quiet voice. She looked into my eyes and back to the wrapped food, and slowly took it from me.

After she took, I immediately turned around and left, I heard her call my name and for me to

wait, but I just sped walked away.

୨♡୧

I walked into the Art classroom, it was already filled to the brim. It was a small room packed with supplies, I smiled slightly at all the paint and material laying around the room. There was even canvas stands with white untouched canvases in the corner.

"Welcome, welcome, you may sit anywhere!" I heard a voice say, I turned to the right to see who I assumed the teacher. After giving her a second glance, I could confirm, she was. Her dark brown curly hair was in a messy bun, strands flying everywhere, she had a pencil ontop of her ear and red reading glasses with the beads around her neck so the glasses wouldnt fall off, and her for her outfit she seemed to be wearing a long plaid dress.. definitely a librarian and an artist.

I looked around the room to choose were to sit. My small smile dropped when I saw Cat. She didn't seem to notice me yet though.

I walked over to an empty table, sitting down and began to fidgit with my hands under the desk nervously.

I saw converse shoes walk in the door, and I immediately recognized whos feet they were. My eyes widened and I looked up to make sure. Yep. There stood Ellie Williams. Of fucking course she would take this class! Any time Riley wasn't with her, her damn nose was either in her notebook or those dorky comics.

Mrs R welcomed Ellie, and they held a conversation for a few minutes, catching up. They seemed to get along well.

It felt so weird to hear Ellies voice. Especially how you could hear her smile in it, and I noticed how her voice got at least a pitch deeper then back at the QZ.

Once they finished their short conversation, I watched in my peripheral vision how Ellies eyes got wide when she noticed me in the class. Ellie stood frozen for a good 30 seconds, before looking around the room. I heard her sigh, and watched as she walked over to Cat.

"Hey Baby.." Cat said to Ellie, I visibly cringed.

"i'm really sorry if I made you upset earlier.. I didn't mean to, and we could talk more about Ra-"

"Shhh- keep your voice down Cat!"

It almost sounded like Cat was gonna say my name? But Ellie cut her off.. probably just me overthinking.

"Wha- why?"

Cat hummed quietly, but the classroom was filled with calm chatter and they sat sorta close to me, so I still could hear.

Ellie then whispered really quietly to Cat, and Cat whispered back, seeming suprised. I really wish I could hear them better.

A girl with blonde hair came in and sat down next to me, not saying a word to me, she only sat down next to me since it was the only open seat left, so I didn't think much of it.

The class then started, and I almost forgot about Ellie, when Mrs R talked about the art we were to learn. Almost.

As much as I tried not to, I kept on glancing at Ellie. Almost everytime I looked at her, she was already looking at me. I hated it.

It's not my fault we were both facing eachother!

The bell went off an hour and a half later. It was nice, Mrs R made it fun. I even talked to the blonde girl since she made us talk to whoever we sat with. Her name was Claire. She was also relatively new to Jackson.

As I got up, Ellie passed by my table, she even made eye contact when she passed, her eyes were strained. What I didn't expect was to see her place down a tiny folded paper on my table.

I looked up to her with scrunched eyebrows, but she already had her back turned and was existing the classroom.

I looked to my left to see Claire just now getting up, she was eyeing the paper, probably wondering what it was.

I took the paper in my hand and turned so Claire couldn't see it, unfolding it. The paper held one word.

why?

[pennyserenade]

it seems that its time for my first reading wrap-up already. being as i didn't have an especially literary september, i decided to include both the months of august and september in this one. going forth, i will likely only do one month at a time. if you'd like to follow my reading journey more closely you can do so at my goodreads or my storygraph. if you would like to talk about these books, recommend your own, and/or speak about your own monthly reading interests and habits, you're welcome to come to my inbox and do so. i'm always willing to speak about this topic, but you'll probably see me do it more at the beginning/end of each month. i'll be tagging this as #miranda's bookclub. if you're interested in following along.

the books i read in between the months of august & september were:

pet sematary by stephen king (fiction) - got from library

miss subways by david duchovny (fiction) - got from library

cultish: the language of fanaticism by amanda montell (nonfiction) - bought on my kindle

the only good indians by stephen graham jones (fiction) - got from libby app (library)

the overstory by richard powers (fiction) - got from library

PET SEMATARY by stephen king.

this novel was my first real incursion into the literary world of stephen king. i've been flirting with the idea of reading a stephen king novel since i saw a boy in seventh grade, clutching his thick edition of it during math class. i'd always been slightly too terrified and intimated, both by the impressive weight of some of his novels and the promise of horror i'd been told of my entire life. i picked up pet sematary as a sort of joke--scary cats coming back to life, haha--and what i got was so much more than i ever could've bargained for. the tragedy and horror in this is not necessarily caused by frankensteinian animals seeking revenge, but by the heavy weight of human grief and this inability we have to let go. i was stunned by the emotion this made me feel, and how deeply affected i was by it. i continue to ardently recommend this to anyone who will listen

my goodreads rating: 5.

my storygraph rating: 5.

MISS SUBWAYS by david duchovny.

oh, david duchovny. i picked up miss subways after reading duchovny's other novel, bucky f*cking dent. i was surprised by how much i enjoyed his writing style in the first novel, and i decided to give this one a try namely because of the fact that it was centered around a female narrator. the way duchovny weaves humor into his stories is great, so markedly him, and what made bucky f*cking dent so wonderful--all that humor, the heart, the genuineness of the story--seemed to stray a little in this novel. i'd like to start of this quasi-review by stating three things: i might not be smart enough for this novel, i probably am not the right audience for it (i don't read much fantasy), and i think this might've been too ambitious of a project for him. the thing i really love about duchovny's writing is that you can always tell how passionate about he is about writing. this is also something i sometimes hate, too. i remember thinking at some points of this that he struggled with telling too much, making it obvious how very much he had researched the topics. as for his handling of a female narrator: not too bad! which surprised me most of all. there wasn't a part in this that really made me roll my eyes or think 'this is a man writing a woman and it's terrible.' he seems to have a grasp on the fact that so much humanity is universal, which is a good thing that so many other male authors often forget. i think duchovny made a most valiant effort in trying to bring this centuries old story to the contemporary, but i think this story wasn't really meant for his humor.

my goodreads rating: 3.

my storygraph rating: 3.5.

CULTISH: THE LANGUAGE OF FANATICISM by amanda montell.

i heard about this book first on tiktok and it captured my attention because like most people i'm vaguely interested in cults. call it morbid curiosity or perhaps its just the anxious person in me always on the look out. when i was a teenager, i once heard something that's stayed with me for a long time: everyone is someone that could be sucked into a cult. i wanted to find out who these people were, the ones that had gotten trapped. while this novel focuses more on the language aspect surrounding cults, i did get a healthy understanding of the people in them. what i really, really, really liked about this novel was the fact that it dealt with and accentuated the fact that these people were often at first willing, smart, and above all things: human. they were not brainwashed beyond the point of saving. they weren't stupid, backyard hillbillies. they were not irrevocably broken individuals. mostly they were affluent, hopeful, and looking for a community of like-minded individuals. their tragic endings were not always the product of their own makings, as we've been lead to believe. they didn't all go out easy, trapped under the spell of a charismatic leader. i liked that the author offered this much needed perspective. i too enjoyed the way montell showed the ways cultish language is employed not only in jonestown situations, but things as simple and innocuous as workout groups and alcoholics anonymous. she throughly picked apart and analyzed cultish language in seemingly every sector of life, and i think that my understanding of these situations is much better for it.

my goodreads rating: 4.

my storygraph rating: 4.5.

THE ONLY GOOD INDIANS by stephen graham jones.

last year i took a class on native american literature and i believe during that class stephen graham jones was one of the authors to be mentioned. i'll admit that i'm rather new to the horror genre, so my grasp of it isn't exactly great but i did enjoy this story and i intensely loved the way this was from a non-white perspective and that it was not a white story. i found myself adequately terrified, psychically cringing at points. these characters, despite all of their endless flaws, were lovable and watching them scum to a seemingly unbreakable curse was equal parts horrifying and sad. the one real critique i have about this story was the pacing of the ending. i found it to be tediously slow at points, focusing too much on the characters of cass, gabe, and mostly denorah. even having said that, i think this was a great novel and i recommend it for anyone looking for a spooky, tragic read for october.

my goodreads rating: 4.

my storygraph rating: 4.25.

THE OVERSTORY by richard powers.

i almost love this one too much for words. currently it is competing for the spot of my most favorite read of this year, and i think its nearly won. i do not think there was a character or family or a relationship in this massive novel that i did not care for or form an attachment to by the end. i cried three times throughout the entire thing and they weren't any trembling lip cries either. no, they were tears down my face sobs. i'm not usually one to cry like that over books, so this was a feat. powers has an incredible way of breathing life into every character that graces the page. in the first part of this story he pays special attention to every character, mapping out their life, their motivations, drawing their lines to trees carefully. in the second half of this novel he throws them together, pushing them all towards one earnest, painfully relevant mission. tragedy, grief, love, passion--it's all here, done so beautifully as to make me enroll in a science class and pick a topic dedicated to the sweeping beauty the forests. i'm not a science girlie and yet this novel has made me care so, so deeply about this it.

my goodreads rating: 5.

my storygraph rating: 5.

[marssmellow]

I wanna share a bit of a life story to explain WHY I feel I am gonna crush this academic year and I'm finally gonna be the top of my class. Pay attention folks, because this is probably gonna be a once in a lifetime show. I am not usually that comfortable sharing my life story online — I also don't want to share anything because I really don't like the Internet BUT my journal is far away and I am too lazy to pick it up so I am writing here instead (I am, in fact, lying to you. My journal is in the bedside table next to my head right now. I am just too lazy at the moment). Btw I feel like this is a story worth knowing about me as a person that all of you, little people who follow this blog + my three (3) real life friends simply must know to understand me. So fasten your seatbelts, we are going down memory lane together.

(tw: mention of sexual assault)

So, when I was in elementary school I was your typical golden child. I was so good in all of the classes and I always got the best marks. Of course, you are thinking "Whaaat, elementary school is not hard??" You'd be surprised. For some reason, elementary schools in Italy are hard. We learn, of course, all the basics, like the alphabet and how to add numbers and all that shit, but we also learn stuff that your typical 6-year-old wouldn't, like rhyming schemes and syllable patterns, chemical reactions, a bit of algebra, the idea of historical process, English and all that stuff (disclaimer: I do not know if this was the case just for my school or my teachers. I just know that we didn't limit ourselves to the alphabets and the names of colours). Apart from a general difficulty in math (probably caused by an undiagnosed dyscalculia) I was very good. However, I had a competitor. My best friend ALSO wanted to be the best in my class. The only difference between us was that, while I was effortlessly talented (I am saying this with every ounce of humility in my body), she tried really hard. I learned this after a long time, but she had very strict parents that used to treat her very badly if she didn't get the highest mark in a test. She went as far as to complain to the teacher if I got a higher grade that hers in tests. And here's the kicker: she would take it out on me. She used to make me feel bad because I got the full mark while she didn't. Of course, it wasn't my fault, but my little brain did not know that and I remember feeling anxious every time the teacher would give us the result of a test because I wanted to know how HER test went. You can well imagine the effect this had on me. I started doubting myself and blaming myself for other people's results. Maybe that's why I want to be a professor now, or maybe it has nothing to do with that. We will never know. The point is that I started to seriously think that she was better than me because she put all this crazy effort into her test while I just...winged them. I seriously did not study that much. I found the tests easy. That's probably something to do with the fact that I was genuinely curious about the subjects and I absorbed the information like a sponge. Anyway, that was the first thing on my path.

In middle school I was heavily bullied and I even was abused by one of these classmates that thought it was funny to grab on my body (yes, I do have a nice set of boobs) whenever he thought convenient. If that guy is reading this, which I highly doubt, go fuck yourself. Anyway, those were the worst years of my life, let me tell you. I was even bullied by a teacher. This teacher used to be my brother's math teacher 13 years back, and he thought it was extremely funny to constantly remind me how my brother was so much better than me. Once again, nobody ever thought that my struggle with math was probably a product of an undiagnosed dyscalculia, but here I was. Bullied by my math teacher. Around this time, I still had competition in the classroom. Another of my classmates competed with me for the highest grades. But let me tell you. She was so beautiful. It was around this time that I should have started realizing that I probably liked girls because I now realize I had the biggest crush on her. I really didn't care if she was better than me, because she was beautiful, and she was cool and she was dating the boss of the bullies. The class used to hate on me every time I said in class that I loved a book, or every time I would answer a question, or that I would get a nice grade. I remember this classmate of mine that almost beat me up because I got a higher grade than him in technical art — because he wanted to be an architect but I was the top of the class. It was horrible. Those three years taught me to keep my interests to myself to not be hated. It made me hate all those things that made me happy. So I gradually convinced myself that the things I enjoyed...I was the only one enjoying them. Those things were mine and mine alone and nobody would ever understand me. I felt alone. Misunderstood. Hopeless, even. Because the things I liked I couldn't pursue.

This is why I chose a high school with a scientific path. Because my brother is an engineer and all my mother could say was how you couldn't live off of books. So I chose physics, chemistry, math and science in general. Because my family said those are the only things that matter. Because literature, and art, and history and philosophy will leave me jobless. Do you remember the undiagnosed dyscalculia? Yes, it wasn't funny. I failed pretty much all of my math tests. Physics I could pull off. I could decently pass chemistry and biology because it was mainly words and not a lot of numbers. But let me tell you — I was happy. My teachers were AMAZING. My math teacher, he is the nicest man in the world (he is also a feminist and an anarchist and I lost myself in conversations about the patriarchy with him a lot of times. He was very funny too. He is so intelligent, he probably could have guessed I had an undiagnosed dyscalculia but I forgive him for that). And my classmates were cool. They didn't bully me. We soon enough recognized that we were there for the same reason — we were all nerds in something. I was, of course, the nerd in humanities. The only incident I can report happened in the third year, when some of my classmates basically ambushed me and forced me to come out as an asexual bisexual (at the time I thought I was bi. Now I know that I was a lesbian in denial). I never forgave them because I used to trust them. But for the rest, things went smoothly. But where is the problem? Well, for four years I was forced to study things I didn't really enjoy. I was terrible. My grades sucked. I was good in Italian, in history and English and art and philosophy, but the key courses? Let's not even mention them. It was a disaster. I lost all of my confidence and all of my passion.

Which is why I decided to study Languages in uni. I wanted out of the scientific world. Back to humanities I go! It was not easy. My study methods were all calibrated to study and learn and memorize scientific stuff. I remember that I passed my Philology exam because I studied the High German consonant shift using my geometry method. I LOVED these past three years of uni. I don't think I was ever this happy. I finally was able to study something I liked, free of judgment (my family, by this point, recognized that my talents lied somewhere else, and not in chemistry or maths) and free of competition. I could be myself. Freedom.

But. There's always one, right? But this was not true freedom. I was still studying things I didn't really like. Like Spanish, for example. I had to choose a second language and Spanish was the easiest course — or so I was told, because let's be honest, that course was NOT easy, even as an Italian native speaker. Everyone that tells you that Spanish and Italian are similar is LYING. Anyway, you can well imagine how a person that lived through what I experienced can feel about studying stuff you don't like. It felt constraining.

During the past two years, I got very lucky. I found myself a partner that loves me for who I am. Friends that support me and love me and make me laugh and are there for me, and that are genuinely interested in my interests. Friends that root for me, even. My family did a complete 360 and now supports me and my plans for the future. I found a professor that not only accepted to be my supervisor but that goes on and beyond to help me in my career. I feel like I'm on top of the world.

Around two years ago, I realized which Master's I wanted to take. It's in the same university, my supervisor is one of the teachers. This means at least another year with my friends and my partner in the city I love, doing the things I enjoy the most. So, these last two years have felt like...a rite of passage. Like something I had to do in order to get to my Master's. Which can be a great motivator, but it can also transform everything that you do into a chore. I lacked intrinsic motivation. All of my motivation was external. "I have to take this Spanish exam so I can graduate and get to my Master's". That's what I thought for pretty much every single one of my exams. I am not gonna lie, if this is your mindset then studying becomes boring. That's what happened to me, I lost most of my motivation to study and do good. I wasn't studying for the sake of learning, I was studying to get a decent mark on the exam and get accepted in my Master's. It was not pretty. It got me pretty anxious too.

But now? Now everything is changing. I no longer have that kind of motivation. The classes I had to take "for the sake of the grade" are no longer there. All the classes of the next two years are interesting, fun, and motivating. Every single one of them will teach me something for my future career AND are genuinely interesting. Which means that, this time around, I have both internal AND external motivation.

Which is what brings me back to my main point. I feel, I KNOW I will crush this academic year. I have the potential to be at the top of my class again. I know I shouldn't brag (but damn I amaze and astonish, as Hamilton would say) but I really feel this way. My mindset shifted during these summer months and I cannot wait to test this new life philosophy. I really can't wait for this new, big adventure, and to see where it will take me. I hope it's somewhere bright and beautiful. I had enough of the darkness.

[manjiropie]

do whatever is in your mind.

Young Mikey x Reader!

Warn! no warnings today! enjoy!

It's not often Mikey and I have a quarrel. We do bicker here and there, but that's what happens between friends, right?

I've joined Toman for almost a year now– although I've known Manjiro for much longer. I met him through Emma, who is a big friend of mine for as long as I can remember. She was there for me at times when I felt like there was no exit, no light. She's an extremely important part of my life– of me.

I've come to realize that I have been spending more and more time near Mikey, which is not bad, I do enjoy his presence. He may look tough and intimidating but he's just like a mochi: freezing cold on the outside but melting saccharine inside. Now that I'm a part of the gang and actually get to know and participate, I've gotten closer to him. Here and there Mikey invites me out.

"So, it's like a date?" I'd smirk suggestively at him.

"In your dreams." He'd try to hide his smile and he'd look away.

However, there are a few little habits he has that tend to send me on a rage trip. I get mad easily. Things will likely set on fire quickly. It's not that I want to, but my mother is not one of the most patient people in the world and she tells me to cool down. As if.

This last week was the cherry on top.

Mikey had crossed the line. He had pissed me off in every single way possible. He pretended not to listen to me while he was eating. He would answer me in a "oh, I don't really fucking care about what you're talking about!" way. He tripped while he was laughing hysterically at something Draken had said and his pink lemonade was all over my white shirt. He drew in an assignment that was due to the next day for my math class. He told me off for no reason at all in front of everyone in the last Toman's meeting... all of that wasn't on purpose. I am aware of how incredibly short his attention spam is when it comes to not so important affairs. But, fuck, couldn't he just be a little nicer to me? At least during last week where I was having sharp cramps in my fucking uterus? Yeah, maybe he didn't know that because I try not to be so obvious. But when he told us we'd be training last thursday I almost laid on the ground in fetal position and cried for hours. I didn't! I fought and then went home and cried.

Then, this Saturday– today –he invited me to his house to hang out. Emma was with a friend and his grandfather was out of town. When he called me to his house we never did much. We'd watch TV, hang out on the couch discussing stupid stuff, we'd be on our phones... nothing so wow. It was still fun, though.

I wasn't in the best mood to leave my comfy bed but I was way less in the mood to fight him off over the phone. So I slid out of the bed and dressed the first jeans I saw laying on the end of my bed and the oversized Nirvana shirt hanging off my chair (it's actually my dad's shirt, shhh).

~

I knocked twice on his bedroom's door.

"Come in." He yelled from inside. I open the door and he's laying on the bed, his head hanging off of it and his hair is almost touching the floor. His face lit up and he rolled over so he laid on his stomach. I walk over and sit down beside him.

"What's up with the frown?" I didn't notice I was frowning to be honest. Guess the bad mood followed me here.

I shrug.

"Ugh, don't tell me you're in a bad mood." He whines. "I called you here to chill and you're already angry. What's up?" He lays on his pillow and swings his legs to place them on my lap. I huff and shove them off, getting up.

"You've been treating me like shit the whole week and now you wanna chill?" I say, more calm than I thought.

"I did not treat you like shit this week? When do I treat you like shit?" His tone was one of disbelief and confusion.

"Ah, Mikey. Embarrassing me in front of the rest of gang; spilling your drink on my school shirt, which is now stained; ignoring me or answering like you're bored..." I list them off on my fingers. "I am the one who asks, what's up with you?! God, you're always being so unpredictable, which is good sometimes but not like this! Not to me!"

I flop down on the couch, starting to get tired of this whole thing. Knowing Mikey, I know that he'll not lay down again.

"So you're the only one allowed to have bad days now?" He sits on the edge of his bed and I turn my head around lazily, uninterested, bored, like him.

"You were laughing incredibly loud with Takemitchi and Draken friday."

"You can be so annoying sometimes."

"Oh, I'm the annoying one now?" I stand up.

"If you don't like my company, why did you even come in first place?" He also stands. We don't have much height difference, but he's hardly two inches taller than me.

His voice is calm, like always. Which makes me infuriated. "Fucking hell! Does it hurt for you to apologize!?" My sudden outburst takes him on surprise, and me, too.

"I already apologized, stop whining about it."

"I'm not whining–"

"If you weren't," he walks to his desk and sets a cup that was once beside his bed down. "You would've dropped this matter before."

"You don't give a damn about what I feel, do you, Mikey?"

"What?" He turns around, brows knit together.

"You heard me. You made me have a bad week and the least you could do is apologize, you dumbass!" I stomp to his direction.

"I already did! Why don't you–"

"Shut up or I'll punch you." I say, slightly looking up.

His eyebrows twitch and he slowly tilts his head to the side, like a puppy. "Or what.. ?"

"Are you fucking deaf?" I point to my ears.

He comes a little closer. "You're gonna do what if I don't shut up?"

"I'm going to punch you if you don't stop being a brat." I sneer at him. My blood boiling. The stress from this shitty past week overflowing in that moment.

"Oh, yeah?" I could feel his breath oh my nose.

"What? Are you doubting me? I would." I jerk up an eyebrow. I've never fought physically with him. But it's not like I can't.

"I'd like to see you try." His eyes flicker to my lips for a brief second and my breath fails, making me cough.

"What? Can't punch me?" He amuses.

"Fuck you."

Suddenly I feel an arm sneak around my waist and in a second I'm chest to chest with Mikey. My eyes widen– his were peaceful as ever, although superior.

"Do it." He says, looking down at me.

The way he's holding me is making my head spin. True, Mikey is cute...

"Do what?"

He laughs at my confused expression. "I don't know... what did you say you'd do to me?"

Ha ha.

His hold on me tightens.

"Do whatever is on your mind." He says.

My eyes roam free between his eyes and his soft pink lips. Do whatever is on your mind.

If he knew what was on my mind, would he still allow me to?

"Do it," he encourages me once again, "aren't you the 'oh so brave' one? Punch me, yell at me, do whatever you want to me."

Those words were the last push I needed. My hands find the soft skin of his neck, hidden by his long hair. I pull him close and lock our lips together. I feel him making a little sound, I don't know if it was surprise or relief.

If by just looking at it his lips seemed soft, actually touching it felt like kissing cotton candy or guessing cloud shapes.

He didn't pull back, in fact, he held me with both hands. I have no clue how he did that but it seemed as though all of my worries dissipated as we kissed.

My heart was beating so fast that it made my chest hurt. My head started to pound when I spent a little too long without air. I pull back from his lips and keep my gaze on them as I breathe heavily.

"Hm." He hums quietly, almost dreamily if you'd ask me.

I look up at his face and smile a bit, noticing how his cheeks are pink. I lift an eyebrow up as if asking what he was thinking. He shakes his head and then puts his right hand on my cheek, caressing it. He kisses me again. This time is slower. As though being present in the moment. As if it were just me and him and nothing else.

----------

I hope you guys liked It! It was so pleasant writing this out of the small bits of ideas that I have. Don't forget: my requests are open. You can request anything! Thank you for reading! Oh, likes and reblogs help a lot! If you consider following it'd make me even happier <3

[tessieravenclaw]

Ravenclaw Love (George Weasley x reader series) ©️ [Part 2]

Petrified.

Pairing: George Weasley x reader

Age: It’s your second year and George’s fourth year in Hogwarts.

Plot: The chamber of secrets has been opened.

Warnings: being petrified

Note: I do not own the harry potter books of course, so the plot isn’t mine; also, there's no fluff yet. But the series is really sweet.

General full forms:

Y/n- your name

L/n- your last name

Y/n/n- your nickname

Y/s - Your sister

Check out:

Part 1

Part 2 (this is part 2)

Part 3

~~~🧡~~~

You and George were having a great time, everyday, you'd meet at the library and just talk. George even promised he'll teach you quidditch after the whole chamber of secrets problem is solved.

Today, were heading to the common room. The Ravenclaw common room since Georgewas eager to see your dorm. You met a tall boy with a broom in his hand on the way. He looked like the great quidditch player, Oliver Wood. You might have had a little crush on him. He was just like George, funny, kind, respectful...you shook your head. 'George! Quidditch! You're late!' He said.

'What? Olie, you never told us!' Said George

'I tell you now! What a good day it is for quidditch! Come on!!!'

'Our next match isn't against slytherin that you're so concerned...'

'Don't call me olie. See you, in 120 seconds,'

George looked at you, confused.

'2 minutes.' You told him. 'You need math classes, kid.'

'Huh. Okay, see you after practice. love yo- er, - bye!

'Yes, umm, same to you, I mean, bye to you too! No, Uh... bye!' You gave a nervous laughter. Did he say love you?

'But listen, Don't roam alone, the monster can harm you..'

'Yes, I'm going to do my homework. Just going my dorm to get my books and then I'll go to the library. See you there'

'Yup.'

You headed towards the common room when you found the prefect Penelope. 'Hi, Penelope' you said, though you weren't sure if she knew you.

'Hi. You must be y/n?' She said calmly

'Yup, how do you know me?' You asked, not very surprised. She was a ravenclaw and a prefect She totally knew you.

'Oh, my boyfriend told me about you'

'Your boyfriend? Told you about Me? I don't get it,'

'You don't need to. And y/n, I warn you to not enter the gryffindor room again.'

'Uh, I just went there once-'

'Rules are rules' She muttered.

You realized you were following her. She led you into the school library. You used the accio spell to bring your books and notebooks and sat on to do your homework. After some while Hermione Granger, Harry and Ron's best friend came running in. Ravenclaws usually said she should be in ravenclaw with such brains. But I never personally thought about it much. 'GO TO YOUR COMMON ROOMS!!' she warned. 'AN ATTACK IS ABOUT TO HAPPEN.'

People went rushing to the library exit. 'What's the matter, Granger?' Asked Penelope. 'You mustn't spread false rumors.'

'THESE AREN'T FALSE!' she kept running around the library searching for some book

'You have no proof, Granger. How can you-'

'What are you looking for?' You asked. Penelope gave you an evil eye, but you wanted to help and prove yourself brave.

'A book - any book - about basilisks,'

Penelope wasted no time. She somehow knew where the book is and gave it to Hermione. 'I suspected...' and then the monster - the basilisk- came in.

'LOOK AT A MIRROR. A REFLECTION. DO NOT LOOK IN THE EYES' yelled Hermione. She teared a page from the book and kept it in her hand. From a pen nearby, she quickly underlined a word. Then she looked looked at you and the others in the library. 'Do the same as me,' she looked at the mirror, and froze. Her eyes turned glassy. Hermione Granger had been petrified. You remembered George I'll miss you, George. you muttered. looked into the same mirror as Hermione, since you didn't have any on you own. And then...you saw white.

~~~🧡~~~

I know it's kinda short but I didn't want to make it too long. Anywho- hope you enjoyed! Next post next week! Tysm for your love and support. Requests are always open, so please feel free to ask me any requests. And follow if you like my posts.

Btw, I do write fluff posts, so if you want one (any character from HP or HoO/ToA (heroes of olumpus/ trails of apollo)

There will soon be a page telling about the requests I take.

THANK YOU!

Tess 🧡

[chim-chimchii]

Encaptured (Jungkook)

Genre: Fluff 

Note: A little fuckboy Jungkook for you all! I’m currently working on a social media au and I might just post the profiles so I can give you guys a sneak peek and to also motivate myself to work on it more! Let me know what you guys think! I also didn’t know how to end this so I apologize if it’s a crappy ending. 

. . . . . . . 

On Thursdays, the literary class met in the college library, and that was when Jungkook always had you look over his essays. Not only did he use that time to get his papers edited, but he also took this time to prod you about your weekend plans.

"So, are you going to accept my offer to take you to the movies this weekend?" Jungkook asked, resting his chin on his palm.

You glanced up from his essay. "Hm, not this week. I think I'm all booked." With a smirk directed towards him, you continued marking his paper.

"You said that last week." He mumbled with a playful pout.

"And last week, when I rejected you, you ended up taking that girl from your math class." You stated with a challenging stare.

Tongue in cheek, Jungkook chuckled, "Well, I couldn't let those tickets go to waste! I thought for sure you would have agreed." He continued trying to justify his playboy ways.

You scoffed and slid his paper over to him; red pen marks were scattered all over it. You thought that the edits you made to his essay would distract him from the current topic, but he pushed the assignment to the side.

"Y/n, when will you let me take you on a date?" Jungkook leaned in ever so slightly and smiled sweetly.

Your heart rate increased. His whole appearance changed with that one smile, and it was hard for you to hide the fact that it made you feel some way. Maybe it was time to give him a chance, and if it didn't work out, then he would finally stop bugging you.

"Okay." You finally answered after thinking it through. That one word took Jungkook by surprise.

"Okay? Are you saying, yes?"

Without making eye contact, you nodded and closed your notebook with a gentle smile.

"I'll pick you up at seven." Jungkook bit his lip to hide his smile and watched you leave the library.

. . . . 

The sun was setting, and seven o clock was right around the corner. You gave yourself one last look in the mirror that hung by the door and nodded in approval of your outfit. You tried to remember the last time you got all dressed up for a date, and as you tried to place a moment, there was a knock at the door. 

As you reached for the door, you hesitated. What if this was a one-time thing? What if he never spoke to you after tonight? Just because you turned his offers for a date down multiple times, it wasn't as if you didn't like Jungkook. You appreciated his presence in your boring literary class; you appreciated his jokes and stories. What if all he wanted was to add you to the list of girls he won over with his charms? 

Your thoughts were interrupted again by a knock, but this time it was a lot softer. You took a deep breath and twisted the doorknob. Whatever his intentions were, you decided to accept this date, so you had to deal with the consequences. 

Jungkook stood in the doorway with his hands buried in his pockets. His head was hung low as if he was half expecting you not to answer, but when you opened the door wider, he looked up. 

You forgot to breathe upon seeing him. Instead of the cliche leather jacket he always wore, he wore a grey flannel over a white shirt. It wasn't THAT different from what he always wore but seeing him wear light-colored clothing suits him well. His demeanor was different, as well. A timid smile replaced the cocky smirk he always had on his face. 

"Are you ready?" His voice came out lighter than usual; it took you a moment to remember this was Jungkook and not someone else. 

"Yeah, let me just grab my bad." You left him by the door as you dashed back to your room to grab your purse. 

. . . . 

It was the little things that Jungkook did that made you weak in the knees. As the two of you walked to the theater, Jungkook rested his hand on the small of your back. He maneuvered you to the other side of him; it wasn't until his warmth left that you realized he was making sure you were closest to the buildings and away from the busy street.

Your eyes fixated on him, and it felt like the world was in slow motion, and you saw Junkook in a new light. You wanted nothing more, but to have this moment last forever. Forever didn't come because he glanced at you with that beautiful smile of his.

"Would you be upset if I told you I don't want to go to the movies anymore?"

The world resumed at its original speed, and your excitement disappeared.

"Oh? Did you want to take a rain check or something?" You tried not to sound too disappointed.

"No, no. I just don't think I can handle sitting next to you for two and a half hours and not talk to you."

You sighed in relief, which made Jungkook chuckle.

"I don't know what you've been told or what you heard about me, but I'm not cruel.

You raised your eyebrow at him and smirked. "I don't know, I've heard some pretty interesting things about you, Jungkook."

You gave him one last teasing look before walking ahead of him. Jungkook tsked before jogging to catch up to you.

"So, are you going to tell me what you heard so I can prove those accusations wrong?"

Together you waded through the crowded street, careful not to lost one another. If he took your hand, would you pull away or let him have that small victory?

"You haven't said what we're going to do now that we're not going to the movies."

His hand grazed yours. "You're changing the topic."

Seconds later, his hand rested on your shoulder to guide you towards the entrance of an arcade. It was full of other couples, groups of friends, and people wanting to have fun. The atmosphere brought a smile to your face. You didn't even realize Jungkook had left until he returned with a bag full of tokens.

"I'll let you choose the first game."

Dramatically, you rested your hand on your heart. "What a gentleman."

Jungkook threw his head back in defeat. "Whoever told you that I wasn't a gentleman needs to stop feeding you lies."

"I'm sorry to tell you this, but you don't really have the best reputation." You explained as you made your way over to the basketball game.

You glanced back at him to make sure he was following and found him chewing on his lip. Your statement bothered him. The two of you exchanged no other words until he was standing next to you.

"Is that why you always rejected me?" His eyes locked with yours, and you didn't dare look away.

Rather than lying, you nodded. "Yeah."

Jungkook was the one to break eye contact; it was clear he was upset. He fished for a token and inserted it into the machine to start the game.

As you watched him, you inhaled deeply and thought about everything. You didn't want to be the reason the date ended in ruins. You were honest about why you declined his offers, but now that you were here with him, you kept thinking how different things could have been if you had just agreed to date him the first time he asked.

Without thinking further, when Jungkook reached for another ball, you took it from him and aimed for the moving hoop.

"You can't blame me for being scared."

Jungkook opened his mouth to say something but stopped as he watched you throw the ball straight into the hoop. Another ball rolled towards you, but Jungkook grabbed it before you could.

"I wasn't blaming you. I was blaming myself." He missed the hoop and ticked his head to the side, slightly annoyed that he didn't score, but as the game ended, he had one of the highest scores.

Together you moved in the direction of another game.

"Why are you blaming yourself?"

He didn't say anything, and you were afraid he didn't hear you due to the increasing volume of everyone around you.

"Because I got careless with relationships and dating, and now that I want something serious, my reputation is ruining my chances.

The corners of your mouth twitched into a tiny smile. "It's your turn to pick a game."

You weren't ignoring what he had said; you just wanted to think about it for a moment longer.

The two of you wandered around the arcade and tried not to lose each other with the growing amount of people entering the building. Jungkook stopped in front of a photo booth and let out a small laugh.

"It isn't a game, but it seems like this is the only thing unoccupied." 

"I think it'll be fun!" You linked his arm with yours and entered the small booth. 

Jungkook sat silently next to you as you messed around with the photo settings. As you sat back, your shoulder brushed against his, and it made it obvious how close the two of you were. You couldn't help but think back to his previous comment about wanting to be in a serious relationship.  Did he mean that he wanted to try and be in a serious relationship with you? You'd be lying if you said you didn't have feelings for him. The truth was, you had liked him all along, but you let the rumors about him cloud your judgment of his character. 

The beeping of the timer caused you to snap out of your thoughts. 

"Are you ready?" You glanced over at Jungkook, and to your surprise, he was already staring at you. The flash went off, signaling that the first picture was taken. Then the timer reset. 

"Your chances aren't completely ruined, by the way." 

The two of you looked away and to the camera, where you opted for a funny face. The camera went off. 

"What do you mean?" Jungkook turned to you again. 

"If you were this version of yourself all the time, you wouldn't have any trouble getting into a serious relationship, and any girl would be happy to be with you."  

You stuck your tongue out at him as the camera snapped another picture. 

"I don't want just any girl though--" He faced forward and held up a peace sign. "--I want you." 

Your expression changed in an instant, and it was captured as the shutter sounded. "Jungkook." 

He hesitated but looked your way as the last seconds of the timer counted down. You took his face into your hands and pressed your lips to his. The moment captured forever as the final flash of the camera washed over the two of you. 

[sierraraeck]

Daylight

Spencer x GN! Reader

Masterlist | Series Masterlist

Summary: After a long time without answers and your relationship ending on rocky terms, you run into Spencer and can finally put things to rest. Part one.

The prompt from @veraiconcos Fic Writer Challenge was “If I asked you to stay, would you?” This is bolded within the fic.

Category: Angst. Just pure angst.

Warnings: Cussing. Mention of normal CM stuff. Suggestive content.

Word Count: 5.5k

A/N: This was initially a songfic and now it’s not, however it was still inspired by the song “Daylight” by Maroon 5. If you wanna give that a quick listen, go for it, if not, that’s chill too. Also, I tried to make this gender neutral, but if I did not, please let me know what I need to correct.

Internal dialogue

Flashback

# # # # # # # # # # # # #

In one word, complicated.

Yes, that was a cliche and overused, but there was really no better way to describe your relationship with Spencer. Unless of course people preferred terms like arduous, intricate, convoluted, twisted, entangled, or your personal favorite, fucked up. Although, that might be a little harsh. Kind of. It was complicated.

And things continued on that path when you waltzed into the San Jose precinct, ready to defend your client against none other than the BAU.

Despite being 28, you were already one of the most successful defense attorneys in the state, and had already had a couple run-ins with the FBI. Luckily, none of those had been against the ‘all-powerful’ behavioral analysis unit, and you were able to wrangle out some wins, or at least, the best you could have hoped for given the circumstances. This time, a man, Brayden Lee, had been arrested as a suspect for a series of strangulations, all of the victims tall, blonde, college athletes. Looking over his case and the amount of evidence against him, you felt sure that you could manage a favorable deal.

But now, your strides faltered as you saw the team of profilers standing around in a circle, speaking in hushed voices, immediately turning around to watch you in. Well, it wasn’t necessarily them that teetered your confidence, it was more like him. And that damn hair.

You were at your older brother’s graduation. A small, skinny kid with moppy brown curls walked across the stage, the gown he was wearing clearly three sizes too big for him. He looked really young, about your age, which immediately interested you.

“Spencer Reid,” the announcer called. He accepted his diploma, moved his tassel from one side to the other, and plopped right back down in his seat.

You just stared at him from your place high up in the bleachers, almost missing your brother as he walked across the stage. You clapped and cheered, but you still couldn’t tear your eyes from the strange kid who’d walked across moments before him. When the ceremony was over, you asked your brother who he was, and all he gave you was a shrug and an arched eyebrow. That was not exactly the answer you were looking for. So you took it upon yourself, being the awkwardly brave kid you were at 12, to find him and learn more. You ended up taking him home after the ceremony, and that was that. You still remember the dopey smile he gave you as he hopped out of the backseat, a smile that you would miss for three more years.

You tried to compose yourself as you avoided eye contact with any of them, marching toward the interrogation room to have some time alone with your client. But it had never been this hard to concentrate before.

Snap out of it. It’s been four fucking years, six if you really think about it, so you need to get it together. This man, the one right in front of your face, needs your help.

So you did just that. As a lawyer, you had to have intense focus, so you made yourself hone in on that skill. The two older men of the team came in to have quite the nice chat with you and your client, but it ended fairly close to how you predicted. He would be let off, for now, but you would have to stay on call in case they found more evidence of your client’s guilt. You ushered Brayden out of the station and into a cab, telling him that you’d be in touch if anything else came up and to keep a low profile.

You were ready to be done, but had to make sure there weren’t any other loopholes or things they weren’t telling you before you could leave. You trudged back into the precinct, expecting to talk to the two men you saw earlier, but found that once-nerdy boy you used to know waiting for you. Not to say he wasn’t still nerdy, you were sure he was, but he’d definitely changed since the last time you saw him.

You tried to act as professional as possible, “Is there anything else that I need to know about this case and your evidence against my client?” Honestly, you were shocked at how calm your voice sounded.

“As long as you’ve heard about his recent purchases and easy access to the material used to strangle these women, no,” he responded, just as casually.

“Okay great, and nothing else in the profile I should be aware of?”

“Nope.”

“Alright then,” you said, turning on your heels to walk out.

“That’s it?” Spencer’s tone suddenly sounded confused, even accusatory, which was such a stark contrast to the smoothe, gentle voice you remembered.

You were at the local library studying for your midterms before the holiday break. No one really went there anymore, and there were a ton of good research tools available, so it was the perfect quiet study spot. Well, mostly quiet, that was, until the ever-so-irritating ping of books being checked out was going off non-stop. You’d had enough, so you shot over your shoulder, “Jesus, how many books do you need?”

The pinging immediately stopped, and you heard a small, “Sorry. Didn’t mean to bother you.”

It wasn’t a lot, but something about that voice seemed familiar. You turned fully around to see those piercing gold eyes staring at you, and you recognized those curls.

“No way. You’re the kid who graduated high school at age twelve! I remember you,” you blurted before really thinking.

“Yeah. Hey (y/n),” he said.

“I’m so sorry I snapped at you like that…”

“Spencer,” he filled in, after hearing you hiss like a snake, trying to jog your memory of his name.

“Spencer! Sorry about that, I’m just kinda stressed about my exams,” you explained.

“It’s okay, I understand,” Spencer replied, gesturing to his ever-growing pile of books.

You inquired about how things were going for him, and he told you all about how his first year and a half in college had been, already obtaining his bachelor’s in mathematics.

“That’s so impressive. Think you could help me?” you said in a somewhat mocking tone.

Of course, he took you seriously, not picking up on the half-joke. “Sure.”

Although, you were thrilled he offered, and the two of you spent the next couple of hours talking about high school and college classes, your seemingly easy math compared to his, and him helping you with any other subject you needed help with, like AP biology and psychology. At the end of the night, you gave him your phone number, trying to cover up your little crush with a joke about needing his help as you rushed out into the freezing night air.

He never used it.

“Yeah. That’s it,” you shot over your shoulder.

“(y/n), hold on, I-” he started.

“Doctor Reid, they need you in the conference room,” some lady said. Now that caught your attention. You spun back around to look at him with raised eyebrows. His mouth was slightly agape, and his eyes flitted between you and the lady who told him he was needed.

“What are you waiting for, Doctor,” you sneered. He let out a sigh, giving you one last pointed look before turning away. You didn’t even know people called him ‘doctor’ now.

You returned home, hoping that the case would get cleared up easily, that they’d find a different culprit and you wouldn’t have to risk that floodgate of emotions bursting open. No such luck. They found Brayden at the scene of the crime, literally in the middle of digging up an old victim to do god knows what with, and took him back into custody. When you got back to the precinct, you told your client not to say a word, and asked what the charges were and if he was going to be transferred in the meantime. The answers to your questions were not in your favor, and you had one of the worst client-lawyer conversations you'd ever experienced. The man wouldn’t tell you a damn thing, and if he didn’t tell you anything, then you couldn’t help him. Of course, it was your job to try and help him as best as you could, but you whole-heartedly believed he was guilty too, which didn’t help you keep the right mindset. Plus, your heart was pounding into your ears for more reasons than being across the table from a serial killer.

Focus, please, you begged yourself. And you did, for a while, but it became a futile effort. At one point you just wanted to say ‘fuck this shit, lock him up’ and leave, you were that desperate.

When it was all over and the station was getting everything together in order to transfer him to a holding facility, you tried to slip out the doors and wait outside. Only moments after, though, you heard the door squeak back open.

“(y/n),” Spencer started.

“I’m sorry,” you quickly interjected. You had been contemplating for the last day or so if you needed to apologize, and just figured you would, if not for your sake, for your clients’. I mean, they would probably end up testifying at some point, not like that was the main thought going through your mind, but you convinced yourself it was. “I shouldn’t have conducted myself like that earlier. It was unprofessional and you were just trying to talk to me.”

“It’s fine. I probably deserved it,” he acknowledged.

“Probably, but that’s all in the past and I should have left it there,” you concluded. You both stood in absolute silence until it became too much to bear. You decided you’d at least try to act natural, “So how have things been since the last time I saw you?”

Spencer looked at you with surprised eyes, but answered with, “They’ve been interesting. There always seems to be a new case. How about you?”

“Same. Just one after the other, but it’s nice knowing I’m helping people,” you added.

“Yeah,” he agreed.

Come on, what else can you throw out there? “Uh, so, they call you ‘doctor’ now?”

He offered a small laugh. “Yeah, they do. When I started, you know, I was much younger than anyone else in the bureau-”

“Still are,” you interjected.

He continued, “-true, but one of my mentors, who’s gone now, told people to call me that and I guess it just stuck.”

“Well, it sounds nice.”

“Thanks. I hear you are doing pretty well yourself, getting national mentions and such,” he stated.

You raised your eyebrows, “You heard about that?” A year or so back you got recognized as the top rising talent in your field of work, but you didn’t think that news would make it to the other coast. Unless he was specifically looking for that information…

“Yeah, I did. The FBI likes to keep tabs on people that might cause them the most trouble in a case, you being one of them.”

“Seriously?” You were astonished. The FBI was keeping tabs on you? “Why?”

“Just in case they get tired of opposing you and would rather work with you,” he shrugged, “But you seem to be having fun opposing right now.”

You let a smile reach the surface at that. “That obvious, huh?”

“I’m a profiler. Plus, you’ve always had a thing for opposing the ‘overbearing’ power and sticking up for the little guy.”

That was a little too close to home. You knew he meant that in more ways than one, and you couldn’t help but think about that god-awful night when you were just two kids trying to take a walk in the moonlight. The night that solidified your friendship.

It happened so fast. All you did was walk away for a second to throw your trash away, but that was all it took for the boys to pounce. Spencer had been attending CalTech for three years, and you were there to pop into the chemistry class, which you conveniently had with Spencer. Those other 20 year olds hated you and Spencer for the sole reason that you were two nerdy 17 year olds that were making them look bad. They’d already gotten in a few good punches before you returned, but when you did, you were livid. They were holding Spencer up while taking turns at him. You worked quickly, setting your phone to record before stepping in between one of the boys and Spencer. You hadn’t intended on getting caught in the crossfire, but you did, landing yourself a pretty bruise on your cheek for the next two weeks. You yelled at them about how they were assaulting a minor and how you now had all of their faces on tape, along with some other legal shit. One of them smashed your phone and went for another punch, but you kicked him in the throat before he could get to you, putting him flat on his ass. He tapped out, and you later found out he’d gotten whiplash from how he landed on the ground. They ran off, and when you turned around, Spencer collapsed in your arms. He was littered with cuts, blood, and already developing bruises. You took him back to his dorm and cleaned him up, spending the night before figuring out how to recover the footage. Once you did, you showed it to the board members, effectively expelling the boys and bringing them up on charges for assault. They got convicted, and no one screwed with either of you again. That was the moment you really decided to become a lawyer.

“Yeah, I guess I have,” you murmured. Brayden was brought out in cuffs and shoved into the back of a squad car, which was your cue to get moving. You had a full case on your hands.

You turned to leave, but as you did, Spencer stopped you. “Hey, would you maybe want to catch up later?”

You didn’t remember him ever being so bold before, and were caught off guard by the question. You stumbled out, “Uh, what did you have in mind?”

“Just … coffee, maybe?”

“Sure,” you said, and immediately saw Spencer’s shoulders relax. “Do you still remember where Arnette’s is?”

“Of course,” he responded. That used to be your favorite go-to spot.

“Alright then. I should be done with this at around eight,” you said, hopping into your car before he could respond. The officer with Brayden had already sped away, and you needed to stay close behind.

The whole drive you kicked yourself for saying yes. You were getting over him. You had gotten over him. And you loved Jordan and couldn’t help feeling like this was somehow betraying him. Plus, why should you be meeting him to catch up? He hadn’t been interested in that for five years! I mean, you put everything into making your relationship work. Sure, you were realistic that it wouldn’t last, but he could have at least tried.

You had it planned out. You would keep in touch until you could go out and visit him during the summer for Fourth of July during your sophomore year of college. The next year, he’d visit you, and the one after that, you’d visit him and so on. But that was the problem. There was no ‘so on.’ You visited him for the second time and that was it. And pretty soon, you could barely get him to pick up the damn phone. The last thing you heard from him was that he was pretty busy starting out with the BAU, along with an unanswered text wondering how his first case went.

But, you already agreed, so you might as well just see what happens.

You threw on some nice, non-work clothes and drove to the little shop on the corner. God you felt like a teenager.

It was just before eight and Spencer was already there waiting for you. Of course he was.

You took a deep breath, reminding yourself that this was supposed to be two people who used to care about each other, and honestly still do, just catching up. Simply talking. About the present, no need to worry about the past.

“Hey, (y/n).” You always liked the way he said your name with welcoming confidence.

“Hey,” you replied. He opened the door for you and you shuffled in. With no surprise, you were the only two in there, and he went ahead and ordered for both of you, remembering what you wanted with ease. You gave him a bit of a confused look as you waited for your drinks.

“What?” he asked, clearly uncomfortable by your staring.

“Nothing, it’s just that you remember my order, that’s all.”

“I do have a really good memory,” he reminded you.

“Yeah, but you also told me once that that only went for visuals, and your eidetic memory didn’t really work on audio,” you quipped.

“That’s true. I guess some things just stick. Plus, it’s not like you made it hard on me. You always ordered the same thing.”

You laughed a little, “I guess that’s true.”

You grabbed your drinks and left the hole-in-the-wall, autopilot kicking in, taking you both along the path that went around the park. Spencer sighed.

“Hm?” you questioned.

“Just, you know, thinking,” he said, brows furrowed.

“About what?”

“How we used to do this all the time. You’d finish your high school classes, drive over to CalTech for chemistry, and then afterward we’d stop by for coffee and a walk,” his voice sounded like he was in a dream, and he looked into the night air as if there was some answer or memory floating around out there. You guessed there was a memory floating around out here.

“Yeah those were crazy years,” you recalled. “I felt like I was constantly on the move and everything was happening all at once and I had all of this stuff I needed to get done. But this was always a nice place where I could clear my head and forget all of that.” That feeling was starting to return as you kept walking, the sticky air of California clinging to your skin.

“It was nice. I miss those days sometimes,” he said.

What is he getting at? “Yeah, I know what you mean.”

You walked in silence for a while, but you could see Spencer’s posture tense up more with each step. There was something on his mind and he wasn’t telling you.

“What is it?”

“What is what?” he acted bewildered.

“What’s on your mind?” He tried to shrug it off and deny it, but you knew him better than that. It might have been a while, but some things, like he said, just stick. And the way his body acted when he was thinking was one of them. “Don’t even try that. I know when there is something bothering you, now out with it.”

“Who is it?” That was all he offered and it was your turn to be confused.

“Huh?”

“Who has the other one?” he said, voice a bit harsher than before, motioning to the gold ring around your finger.

“His name is Jordan.”

“Jordan, huh?”

“Yep.”

“What does he do?” Spencer inquired.

“He’s also a lawyer. We actually met in law school,” you answered somewhat hesitant. You still didn’t know what he was getting at, if anything.

“Oh. Nice.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” your attitude starting to flare up.

“Absolutely nothing. Just not what I thought,” he stated with a bit of an edge to his voice.

“What did you think?” You were trying not to get offended by whatever he was implying, but you couldn’t help it. He asks me to catch up just to make passive aggressive criticisms?

“I don’t know. Not that, I guess.”

At this point, you wanted to grab him by the shoulders and shake him. “Well, you know, you could have changed that,” you replied in the same passive aggressive manner.

“What would you have wanted me to do?” his voice was raising, obviously picking up on what you were putting down.

“Uh, I don’t know, how about respond to one goddamned text?”

“I tried.”

“Not really. And then you just went dark,” you spat.

“You seemed to be fine with that. You moved on pretty quickly,” he hissed, not even bothering to look at you.

“Why do you think that is, genius? I visited you, and then you stopped answering my calls. You stopped responding to my texts. I basically never heard from you again, and then the next thing I know, your showing up on my fucking tv, in California for a case, and you don’t even reach out. You didn’t even ask to meet up anywhere, not even stop by to say hey. Nothing. You did nothing once your job swallowed you up whole. I know what that’s like and it’s hard, believe me, I’m a lawyer for Chrissake, but I found the time. Plus, for all I knew, you had already found someone else, so I wasn’t going to wait around for the guy who seemed to love me much less than I loved him.” By the end, you were yelling, and thanking the stars above you that no one was around to hear it.

“You’re right,” he whispered after a while.

You were stunned, and could only manage a small, “What?”

“You’re right,” he repeated. “I should have put in more effort. I don’t know, (y/n), I wish I had a better answer for you but I don’t. I was young, and stupid, and I didn’t know what I was doing. I let my insecurities get in the way of us, and I will never be able to forgive myself for that.”

“What?” It was seriously the only thing going through your mind, however, you were able to force out, “Insecurities?”

“Yeah. I was worried that because I was away, you were going to tire of me, that you weren’t going to want to stay in a relationship. I thought that maybe, by being ‘tied’ to me, so to speak, that I was holding you back, which we promised each other we would never do. We said that we would never get in the way of the other’s dream, and I wondered if maybe I was going to do that to you. I just … I had all of these doubts, so I panicked. I stopped responding. And I was so wrong to do that.”

Now that he’d said them, they sounded like some of the same doubts he expressed to you the night before he left.

“What time is your flight?”

“Seven, which means I have to be there by six, which means I have to be leaving here by four-thirty at the latest,” he recited. He had all of his stuff piled by the door, which was hardly anything at all. You were in his hotel room because his house was soon to be taken over by a young couple, since he’d be living in Massachusetts, and his mother was in a mental facility. You’d just come back from visiting her, which left Spencer in tears.

You ate dinner while playing chess, which he effectively beat you at. You were actually pretty good at it, but no match for his math-based brain. You snuggled into bed next to him, willing yourself to keep it together because the last thing you wanted to do was spend your last night with him an emotional wreck. He queued up a movie, but neither of you paid any attention to it. His arm was draped around your shoulders and yours were clasped around his waist.

Spencer’s hand lazily circled your back until it moved with purpose down to your thigh. He continued his lazy patterns when you looked up at him, a question in your eyes.

You’d been with Spencer for over a year, and recalled your first time. You were ready before he was, which came as no surprise, but that didn’t stop the nerves from racing through your head. But if you thought you were nervous, you had no idea what was going through Spencer’s head. He later told you that he was absolutely terrified because he didn’t want to do something wrong, and he didn’t want to make you uncomfortable, and he didn’t want you to think less of him because of his body style, and a million other things that he was scared about. That’s how you accidentally said the ‘L’ word. “Spencer Reid, I would never judge you and you could never scare me away. I love you and your body and your brain, and you are not going to do something wrong, not like I’d know because we are both new to this and are doing it together. Understand?”

He gave you a shy smile. “I do.”

Now though, it was very different. Comfortable, confident, safe.

“Can I have you?” he asked, “All of you, one last time?”

You leaned up to kiss him, and he sighed when you pulled away. You looked him straight in the eyes, “I’m all yours.”

And you were. You felt like you always had been and probably always would be, and could only hope that he felt a fraction of the same. Your bodies pushed and pulled in perfect unison, fitting together as if you were two pieces of a puzzle, specifically crafted for the other.

You returned to your curled up position beside him, and you couldn’t hold it in anymore. The tears silently flowed out of your eyes, but you couldn’t make yourself peel your arms away from him long enough to wipe them away. You attempted to sob without making a sound, knowing that if Spencer saw you crying, it would make him cry, and he couldn’t cry because it would make you cry more, splitting you right in half. It didn’t matter how quiet you were being about it, because when you looked up at Spencer, you saw the same silent tears glistening on his cheeks. It was only then that you pulled your hands from around him and brushed away his tears.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to bring the mood down,” you apologized. “This is supposed to be exciting. You’re going to the best school in the country to get your PhD.”

“It’s okay,” he replied, moving his hands up and down your arms, “Sometimes, I wonder if I’m making the right decision.”

This took you by surprise. He’d always seemed confident about this, passionate about furthering his education. “What makes you say that?”

“I don’t know. I guess I just don’t want to complicate things for anyone. For my mother. For you.”

“If I asked you to stay, would you?” You knew it was unfair, but it was the only thing you could think to say. The only thing you wanted to say. You needed him, and it was sickening wondering if soon, he might not need you. He stared at you dumbfoundedly, so you quickly covered it up with, “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have asked that. You are about to start a whole new part of your life, and you should go, pursue your dreams with the best education this country can offer. I don’t wanna get in the way of that.”

You repositioned yourself back on his chest, and started to drift off to sleep when you felt him sigh. You lazily peered up at him, meeting his restless eyes. “Spence, you need to sleep.”

“I can sleep on the plane. I need this more,” he said, smiling at you. You tried to stay awake like you knew Spencer would, but to no avail. You did, however, wake up to him getting ready to leave. He kissed you goodbye, and you held yourself together until he’d walked out, the door shutting with a definite ‘click.’

All the air had been stripped from your lungs and you felt like you couldn’t breathe, like you’d never again without him by your side. You cried yourself back to sleep, willing this all to be one giant nightmare, but when you woke, he was gone. And you felt completely numb. So while you may have been two pieces of a puzzle, aiming to create the same beautiful picture, you no longer fit together.

You felt yourself starting to get flushed from constantly going in and out of anger then feeling bad and forgiving. It was exhausting, and probably part of the reason things didn’t work out between the two of you. That didn’t mean you loved him any less, though. He was, in fact, your first love, and you guess people were right about that stuff being more powerful and affecting you longer. Hell, you walked into the precinct for a total of three seconds before he was affecting you all over again!

You took a deep breath in before saying, “I guess we both made mistakes and wished we would have handled things differently.”

“What would you have handled differently?” He sounded genuinely curious.

“When I saw that you were in California for a case, instead of … doing what I did, I should have been the one who reached out. I could have just asked you then what was going through your mind and what was going on between us. Who knows how that might have changed things? But, I was petty,” you gave a cold laugh, “I guess I still am sometimes, huh?”

You had definitely been acting that way lately. You felt guilty and ashamed about it, but in that moment of anger four years ago, knowing that Spencer was out there ignoring you, you sent him a hurtful message and then blocked his number. Only a week or so prior, you’d met Jordan who was clearly hitting on you, and you were so firm about moving on that you asked him out. He eagerly agreed, and the rest was history. Or, at least, you thought was history.

Spencer shrugged and dodged the somewhat rhetorical question. “We can’t really dwell on that now.”

You knew he didn’t really mean that, considering he was the type of person who dwelled, but he was right. You were engaged to a great guy and soon to be married. This, Spencer, was something you were just going to have to come to terms with, something you realized you hadn’t come to terms with yet.

You’d been walking so absentmindedly next to him that you hardly noticed you were outside of a hotel. He stopped just outside the lobby entrance and turned to face you.

“Walk you to your room?” you offered. What the fuck did you just say? Why did you say that? You can’t say things like that. Stop it.

Spencer gave you that small, closed lip smile of his which immediately ended your inner scolding, and nodded, holding the door open for you. You walked up the stairs together in silence. When you reached his door, instead of getting out his card, he leaned his back up against the heavy wood.

“Alright, well, it was nice catching up, and I wish you safe travels in the morning,” you said, turning to leave. He quickly reached out and grabbed your hand, stopping you in your tracks, and you spun around to face him.

“If I asked you to stay, would you?” Those words pierced through your ears, ringing all too familiar from when it was you who said them.

“Spence-” you started. And then his lips were on yours. Those sweet, soft lips. It had always been so natural between the two of you, and you felt his tongue bypass yours as you pushed further into the kiss. Then you remembered where, and when, you were, no longer that hopelessly devoted kid but an adult with a wonderful man waiting for you when you got home. You pulled away. “Spence-”

“I would have said yes, you know,” he confessed. The question must have been etched on your face, because he continued, “When you asked me that night, given the chance, I would have said yes.”

His words stung, and your whole body ached from rehashing old feelings, to igniting new ones, to the guilt of what just happened weighing on you so heavily you might just crumble beneath it. You murmured out, “Why didn’t you?”

“I thought you were right. I thought I was doing the right thing. Out of all the mistakes I’ve made, all the regrets I have, you, (y/n) (y/l/n), are my biggest one.” His honey brown eyes peered right into yours, like he was looking at something far greater than just your eyes, and repeated, “So right now, if I asked you to stay with me, would you?”

It was too much to handle. After all the time you’d spent wishing he was still yours, he finally could be, but you could no longer be his. Tears were streaming down your face as they once did, the first time you lost him, and you choked out, “I can’t.”

One More Night

Taglist (open)

@justanothetfangirl

@kris-stuff

@wooya1224

[fairynavi]

unbearable

a haikyuu x reader ficlet

words: 3.01k

pairing: tsukishima kei x reader

warning/s: just pure fluff about to be thrown your way my dude

Tsukishima Kei has never pegged himself as the romantic type. Yamaguchi can confirm. The blond has never read any of those romance novels during his leisure time, he never pays attention to the dramas his mother watches on TV, and he's never thought twice about dating someone.

He's never fallen in love with someone. He thought it was dumb to fall in love, Romeo and Juliet being a good contender as to why love is such a complicating yet stupid thing. He believes that loving someone romantically is a bother, that's why he's never looked at anyone that way. He's merely protecting himself from getting hurt from love because everything that's said in those romance novels are exaggerated, he tells himself.

Tsukishima was content with everything he had as of now. He's okay with focusing on self-improvement, he doesn't need to value or think of other things.

That is until you showed up.

You're a first year manager, alongside Yachi, of the Karasuno Boy's Volleyball Team and Tsukishima immediately deems you as another person to avoid because the first person you got along with was Hinata. Just like with everyone else, he doesn't interact with you that much, and only says what's necessary when he has to talk to you.

Unfortunately for him, he finds out that you're classmates.

Tsukishima doesn't memorize everyone's names in his class, he doesn't feel the need to do that ever. Once classes end, he's immediately off to practice with Yamaguchi, that is unless he's assigned for cleaning time, so he doesn't even remember you right off the bat.

During English class, the teacher picks you to read a passage from the story that you were analyzing. Being fluent in the English language, this didn't bother you at all. So you stand up and begin reading. Everyone's eyes are on you. They've never heard you speak English before, so they're all definitely surprised, especially a certain tall blond a few seats away from you.

'She's eloquent...', he thinks. Of course, that's what anyone would think if they heard you speaking right now. He's staring at you, and he only realizes when he hears the teacher commend you on your English. He's trying to focus on the lesson, but his mind keep coming back to you and your voice. It's lovely, and soothing in a way. He feels his cheeks heat up a little from thinking about you too much. He finally calms down and focuses back on the passage.

As classes end, the blond sees Yamaguchi begging something from you. As he gets closer, he learns that the other boy is asking for English lessons from you. Yamaguchi notices the taller boy and give him a quick greeting before giving his undivided attention back to you.

"Yamaguchi-kun, are you sure you want me to teach you English?"

"Of course, [Y/N]! There's no one else I know who's as insanely good in English as you are!"

"Well, alright. I guess I can teach you English."

"Teach me as well." Tsukishima finally speaks. Almost in sync, Yamaguchi and you whip your head towards the tall boy's direction. You're just as surprised as Yamaguchi is from Tsukishima's sudden and very surprising request. Tsukishima, of all people, is asking for help. He must be having that much trouble in English to ask someone else to help him.

You're the first to break the uncomfortable silence and you agree to teaching the both of them the subject, Tsukishima is forever thankful for you taking the initiative in changing the awkward atmosphere between the three of you.

Over the course of a few weeks, he's warmed up to you. He talks to you a lot more now, and very rarely he actually engages in the conversation first, but those were usually about homework. Thanks to Yamaguchi and Tsukishima, you've developed a good amount of confidence in your skills as well. You're much more social than you were before, though that's because of Hinata's influence on you, and you participate in a lot of the class activities, be it extra curricular or just favors from your classmates.

Tsukishima always thought you'd eventually forget about him and Yamaguchi, so he stopped himself from getting too attached to you, but to his surprise, you never said no to Yamaguchi whenever he asked to hang out. Sure, you've made a lot more friends now, and you've gained some popularity as well, but you never strayed too far away from the first friends you've ever made.

Not only are you smart, but you're also incredibly kind and selfless, traits Tsukishima never understood. You'd almost immediately, and sometimes literally, drop whatever you were doing and go and help them with whatever they need assistance with, even if it's a little request like taking the trash out to the garbage bins behind the school. You basically thrived off of helping out, and Tsukishima is beyond intrigued by you.

You see, Tsukishima has never seem himself as selfless. He only does things that benefits him. He'll only agree if something is of use to him. To put it in other words, he's selfish. He's never done things to help others, he'll only do so if necessary, such as group projects. He's never the type to consider actually helping someone out because he just felt like it. If it benefits him, he'll do it, if it doesn't, he won't. Simple as that.

Before Tsukishima's even realized it, he's staring at you as you talk to a classmate of yours. Unfortunately, Yamaguchi notices the boy's lovestruck state and decides to initiate a conversation with him. "Tsukki, you've been staring at [Y/N] a lot," He says, catching the taller boy's attention. Tsukishima's eyes dilate in his sudden approach, his cheeks having a tint of pink, and he glares at his friend.

"Shut up, Yamaguchi."

"Sorry, Tsukki, but I'm just surprised how she hasn't noticed just how much you stare at her."

"... Is it really that obvious?"

"To me, it is. To her, it isn't."

Tsukishima groans internally. He didn't even notice that he was staring for so long until Yamaguchi brought it up. No, he will not admit that he was admiring you. Never. He'll get over this, right? This is just a one time thing... right?

Wrong.

He wants to get closer to you now. He wants to interact with you every day. He wishes he sat near you so he could ask for a pencil just so he'd have an excuse to talk to you. He hoped that his heart would stop beating faster whenever you looked at him and smiled. He hoped that his cheeks would stop growing pink whenever you laughed at a corny joke Hinata made. He hoped that his legs wouldn't get wobbly whenever he hears the mere sound of your voice. He hoped things would just go back to normal. But just hoping wouldn't work.

Tsukishima Kei has undoubtedly fallen in love with you.

And he's realized that when he overheard a conversation between you and a male classmate;

"Hey [Y/N]."

You stop erasing on the chalkboard and turn to face him properly. You dust off the chalk dust on your skirt and blouse and reply, "What's up?"

"I was wondering... Could we, you know, meet- uh, meet behind the school later? Before your club activities, of course..." He was clearly blushing, everyone could see that, he was fidgety, and he stuttered a bunch of times. Anyone could already tell where that was going. Except you.

"Oh, of course!" You smile innocently at him, as he smiles back widely. He goes back to his group of friends with a very victorious look you were unable to see. As you turn around, you are met with a pair of familiar pair of eyes, staring you down as if you did something unbelievable.

"[Y/N], what was that about?"

"I don't know, he probably needed help with something. Maybe homework. But he could've just asked me right here, it's not like I would judge him for asking for help. Maybe he's just shy, who knows?"

Yamaguchi face palms at your response, you're even more confused. The green haired boy looks at you in disbelief, and sighs in frustration, "You know what, I'll leave that to you to find out."

Yamaguchi did say he'll leave it to you to find out, but he needed to know how things would turn out. So he dragged Tsukishima along with him, who silently agrees to following you behind the school, despite you telling them that Daichi or Coach Ukai might get mad at them for being late. Yamaguchi, bless his soul, told the two of you that he would take responsibility and would take any punishment that went along with it.

The two boys hid behind the corner of the building, listening closely to your conversation with your classmate.

"Nakamura-kun, why'd you ask to meet me here?" You ask him, clearly not understanding the atmosphere that was around the both of you. Anyone who would catch you there would understand what was happening, but unfortunately, you just couldn't predict what was going to happen.

He stood there for quite a bit, fidgeting, and avoiding eye contact with you. His face seemed all red and you began to worry if he was getting feverish from all this. You take a step forward and he immediately freezes up from you getting close to him.

"Nakamura-kun."

"Y-Yes?!"

"Are you feeling ill? You look red. Maybe you should go to the clinic."

He shakes his head repetitively, saying he wasn't ill and that he really had something to tell you. You nod and wait for him to say it, as you didn't want to make him uncomfortable enough than he already was.

"I... I really like you, [Y/N]!"

"Oh? I like you too, Nakamura-kun."

Yamaguchi face palms. Tsukishima stifles a laugh.

"Really? Then, will you go out with me?"

"Go out? Right now? But I still have club activities." You tilt your head in confusion as he fumbles to find the right words.

"No! Not right now! Maybe on Saturday! Yeah, does that sound good?"

"Oh, perfect, I'm free that day. So which subject are you having trouble on? If it's Math, I can't really help you with that."

Yamaguchi is currently trying to stop Tsukishima and himself from laughing out loud.

"What?" He looks at you, his life draining out of him.

"We're talking about homework, right? Oh! Did I get it wrong? Did you need help with another thing?"

"[Y/N], no. I meant... I meant like go out on a date! Like a romantic date!"

You squint your eyes at him as you process the words in your head. One by one, the cogs in your slow brain finally start moving, and you finally get what he's trying to say.

"Oh, like those dates you see in the movies? I'm sorry, Nakamura-kun, I'm just not the person you should be liking, there are a lot more girls there that will surely make you happy. I'll just make you frustrated, I'm sorry. I really am." You bowed at him politely but he assures you that he doesn't need you to apologize, he just wanted a proper answer from you.

Hearing you say that made Tsukishima's heart drop. You were already aware that you'd make people frustrated with you, and he didn't want you to think that way. He felt a strong desire to change that, but you guys were just friends, he doesn't have a right to change anything about you, he doesn't even have the chance to.

You turn around to see Yamaguchi snickering like a kid and Tsukishima just looking at him with his signature annoyed look. You laugh and them and begin dragging them to the gym, where you were met with an annoyed coach, a concerned Daichi, and very curious players.

Despite having rejected that boy, there were still other people from other classes who tried to woo you with their pick-up lines, but you never really got them, so you just laughed and nodded in hopes of them not getting hurt by you not being able to comprehend any deeper meaning to what they say.

"Does your hand feel heavy, [Y/N]-san?"

"No? I don't think it's possible for a hand to feel heavy?"

"Nevermind."

You tried your best to understand, you really did. You just wanted to keep up with their pick-up lines, but you just couldn't do it. You've never had that kind of experience, so it was hard to understand what they were trying to say.

But without realizing it yourself, you were also beginning to get interested in a certain tall blond classmate. You quickly dismissed these reactions as something everyone can experience, you weren't the only one, of course. Everyone feels this way around Tsukishima. Right? Right?

"[Y/N], I can very much confirm that not everyone feels that way towards Tsukki."

Oh.

"So, your legs don't get wobbly and your heart doesn't beat faster around Tsukishima?"

Yamaguchi laughs and you feel yourself feeling embarrassed as he does so. You give him a light punch on his arm, since you can't reach his head, and cross your arms, a pout present on your face.

"[Y/N], I'm not in love with Tsukki."

In love? Is that what it is?

"I can't be in love. I don't even understand what love is enough to actually feel it." You say, trying to convince yourself more than you're trying to convince Yamaguchi, who only shrugs at your response.

"If you say so, [Y/N]."

The next few days were weird.

For some godforsaken reason, Yamaguchi had convinced Tsukishima to at least flirt with you a little bit, having learned that the blond was hopelessly in love with you, even though the taller blond told the other that you'll have the same reaction as you did with those other guys that tried to do a pick-up line on you.

The first time he tried to flirt, which was a pick-up line about a highlighter and brightening up his world, it turned into you telling him a story about how you accidentally drank water with highlighter ink thinking it was some kind of juice. He was actually immersed in the story sometimes, teasing you about how you couldn't recognize the color of the highlighter.

The second time he tried to flirt, where Yamaguchi would "accidentally" shove you into Tsukishima, he pushed you too hard and ended with you sitting on top of a very uncomfortable and potentially hurt blond.

The third time he tried to flirt, where he intended on staying close to you a lot, like sitting next to you during study sessions, walking next to you during the walk to the gym, just staying close to you in general, you didn't at all notice because you just thought it was normal for friends to do that, all the while trying to ignore your loudly beating heart.

The fourth and final time he flirted with you, was when you finally confessed to him.

Tsukishima is an observant person, so he's probably noticed your mannerisms around him by now. How your tone of voice changes when you talk to him, and how easilt flustered you get when you talk to him. He thought he had a chance, and he was right.

"I don't really like talking about feelings that much but Yamaguchi told me to tell you everything that I'm feeling. So, here goes nothing, I guess."

You take a deep breath and you suddenly feel as if the ground was shaking. You're terrified, but you have to do this. You've already committed to this. There's no turning back.

"Tsukishima, whenever I look at you, I feel really happy. Your voice makes me feel like I'm on the comfiest pillow in the world. Whenever you do that really cute smirk when you tease Hinata or Kageyama, it makes me laugh a lot. You're weird."

"Excuse me?"

"Shut up, I'm not done yet."

You inhale once more.

"You're really mean to Hinata and Kageyama, and you're also unintentionally mean to a lot of our classmates, but I like that about you. Whenever you offer to help me with Math, I kind of feel sad because I'm supposed to be the one doing all the helping!"

"You don't always have to help-"

"Let me finish! You're actually really nice, you know? I saw you playing with a stray cat the other day and giving it food and it made my heart do flips! You looked really cute. I don't know how to express myself properly, and when I try to, it's word vomit. I want to learn and try to be better for you, I want to know what to do with this slow brain of mine, and I really really want to do all those romantic stuff with you."

You're in the verge of crying, but you quickly wipe away any evidence of you crying.

"I... I think I like you, Tsukishima."

He doesn't say anything and you feel embarrassment creeping up behind you. The air is suffocating and you want to run away, but you legs are stuck to the ground. You feel ashamed in the other's presence, wanting to dig a grave and rot in it.

Then, you feel big arms wrap around your smaller frame, pulling you close to his chest, as he buries his face on your shoulder. He only hugged you for a while, as he isn't that type to prolong skinship.

You clear your throat and break the short silence between the two of you, "I've been meaning to ask. Did you flirt with me earlier?"

"Have been for the past week, but thanks for noticing." He replies almost immediately as you just stand there in shock.

"Oh."

"You're unbearable, [Y/N]."

You look up at him and laugh, punching his chest lightly.

"But you love me."

"Yes, yes I do."

this is my first haikyuu character x reader ficlet so i hope you at least like it a little bit hahahah

[the-unshaped]

CHAPTER ONE: WELCOME BACK TO BEACON HILLS

Chapter Text

"How's the first day back?"

Stiles Stilinski grinned as his oldest friend, Scott, slapped a strong hand on his shoulder. After what felt like a million years away from each other, he was back, his best friend standing beside him. It was a fantastic feeling.

Walking into the school was bizarre. He had felt nostalgia in the past but nothing to this extent before. Maybe it was because his last school was so much larger, but it seemed like every year they were making noticeable changes. Beacon Hills, on the other hand, was exactly how he remembered. The same white and black speckled linoleum floors, same painted mascot on the walls, same old lockers, same trophy cases lining the main hall.

Stiles was stoked.

Even the classes he'd taken so far, which would have ordinarily bored him since he'd learned a lot of what they were going over already, left him feeling almost giddy. The teachers didn't seem to share the sentiment, but fuck them. He wasn't going to let Finstock calling him Billinski a million times drag him down today.

Stiles and Scott had met up the day before, his dad surprising him with dinner and his childhood best friend as a gift for finishing all his unpacking, but it was even more exciting to know he was going to see him every day. They had talked at least once a week after Stiles finally broke and got Facebook eighth grade year and even more when they both had online gaming, almost every day. It was like they'd never stopped.

Stiles had been begging his dad to move back since the day they left, and he only got more persistent after his reunion with Scott, but no matter how hard he tried to convince him, no dice. That is until his dad's college friend, Adam Wilder, let him know that the Beacon Hills was offering full ride scholarships to the college of their choice to the top 5 graduates and was in need of a new sheriff. Not even John could refuse that kind of help. Despite his worry that he wouldn't be accepted as a transfer, he took a chance and put in an application. A month later and a million moving boxes later, Stiles was leaving his fancy Sacramento apartment and on his way home.

"Not bad, Scott. I've got Dad, my best bud, and my nightmares of a poorly-aged Lydia can finally be absolved because she is still as much of a goddess as the day I left, dare I say more. All is right with the world," he said, eyeing the lean strawberry blonde haired girl down the hall. Scott winced, and pulled at his lock, freeing it from the metal loop before opening it and shoving his math book inside. "I definitely missed this place. What more could I ask for?”

Scott scoffed and scuffed the toes of his shoes against the floor. "I can't imagine why anyone would miss this place."

Stiles eyed him, unsure if he was playing around or not. Leaving Beacon Hills, for him, felt like tearing off a limb, leaving something messy, jagged and bloody in its place. Sacramento hadn't been bad, per se. He made awesome grades and was in a club or two every year. He had some people that could pass as friends he hung out with occasionally, but it wasn't the same as the life he had in Beacon Hills. Also losing a limb, Stiles had survived the initial pain and adapted, but at the end of the day, he knew that it wasn't there and could feel the ache of its absence.

Stiles knew he was meant to be there. It was where he was born m. Where he learned how to tie his shoes and write his name. Where he and Scott made a terrible mess in the kitchen making treats for a fundraiser, and Melissa made them clean all day after school, scolding them even as she ate the last remaining cupcake. It was home.

The only difference between losing a limb and losing Beacon Hills was that there was always a voice in the back of his mind telling him that he could get it back, if only he could convince his dad. It was only a few hours away, and he would eventually be able to choose where he lived. Luckily he hadn't had to wait that long.

Stiles shrugged off Scott's dismissal. "I'm sure you'd miss it once you left."

Stiles closed his locker, and noticed Scott had gone quiet. He took a peek over his shoulder as he clamped his padlock shut and realized he had his eyes trained on an adorable brunette talking to a fierce looking blonde he had noticed earlier in their math class. Stiles looked between them a dorky smirk spreading across his face.

"You are so obvious, man. Your tail is practically wagging."

Scott's eyes shot up, eyebrows knit together. "What?"

"That girl. The brunette. You have your 'unrequited pining' look on your face," Stiles explained, shutting his locker door. Scott frowned, crossing his arms, even as he snuck another peek at her.

"It's not that obvious," Scott muttered.

"I've literally only been here for," he looked at her phone, then back up at Brennan, "three hours and forty-five minutes and I knew the moment you looked at her."

Stiles looked at Scott's downtrodden face then brightened. "Wait, is that Allison? Like love of your life, scary but amazing, Allison?"

The blonde glanced over at them, smirking at Scott. Stiles didn't seem to notice. Even if he had he would have no reason to suspect that she could hear anything he said, but Scott knew differently. He flushed, wrapping his arm around Stiles shoulder, whipping him around to face the lockers in a huddle.

"Dude," Scott hissed. "Keep it down."

"It is her! Holy crap," Stiles laughed. Scott just pouted, his eyebrows still pulled together.

"Yeah, yeah. You're brilliant. Can you shut up now?"

"Come on. You act like people are listening," Stiles said, craning his head around to look at the near bustling halls. "Trust me, we aren't that interesting."

"Speak for yourself. I'm plenty interesting."

"Oh yeah? Let my go ask how interesting you are," Stiles teased. "Yo, All-!"

Scott clamped a hand over his mouth, and Stiles was quick to retaliate.

"Did you seriously just lick me? How old are you? Stiles. Stop it!"

Scott dropped his hand with a scowl, wiping it on his dark jeans.

"I'll have you know, licking people could solve approximately 80% of the world's problems," Stiles said, hitting Scott suggestively. "Speaking of licking, how the hell did you get so built? I thought you sucked at sports."

Scott's scowl bled into a full blown grin, ignoring Stiles' sexual remark. "That was last year. A lot has changed. Now hurry up or we're going to miss lunch. And please try to control yourself a little, okay?"

Stiles gave him a questioning look, but didn't ask. He followed Scott through the halls, weaving through the people, trying to connect names to old familiar faces. Some people were easier to remember than others. He would catch flashes of memories from t-ball and baseball practices, or stories her dad had told him on the car ride here. He had only ever really been close to Scott before they left, but the familiarity was calming in a way he hadn't expected.

Stiles couldn't help but grin when they pushed through the heavy doors to the cafeteria.

The walls were a less than white white, dull and slightly grimy with age. They had long rectangular tables instead of the faux wood round ones at his old school, but honestly he liked these better, even if it was just a bit too much white all together for his taste. Too much like a hospital.

"Wow it hasn't changed at all," Stiles chirped. "I bet Mrs. Green still has that wild chin hair, too."

As if she could hear him, Mrs. Green looked up at him with a scowl. He waved at her excitedly, a lopsided grin painted on his face, and Scott shook his head in amusement.

"Hi, Mrs. Green!"

As they made their way through the food line, Stiles reminisced over the meatloaf and asked if they still had the breakfast pizza with white gravy and sausage balls he loved so much. Scott couldn't help but get secondhand excitement. It had been so long since he had felt normal like this. Not that he didn't like his life or that he didn't enjoy things the way they were, but having a friend that wasn't constantly caught up in his problems was nicer than he had expected it to be.

Stiles continued chattering excitedly up until the moment Scott sat down. At a table. With people. Very hot people. Stiles looked down at Scott with wide eyes, his mouth agape. Lydia Martin. Scott was friends with Lydia fucking Martin? How had this not made it into their text messages?!

Scott cleared his throat, obviously embarrassed.

"Guys, you remember Stiles, right? Stiles, that's Lydia, Allison, Isaac, Jackson, Boyd, and Erica. Cora normally sits with us but I think she-well, actually I'm not sure where she is today."

Stiles' eyes followed down the line, his face flushing. What the fresh hell? Scott was attractive in a totally platonic, nothing sexual way, and he would be blantantly lying if he said he hadn't noticed how fit he was now, but how the hell did they go from being the lanky dorks in class to Scott having supermodel-esque friends?

He immediately recognized some of the faces. Lydia, obviously. Scary hot blonde and Scott's crush, obviously Allison, from the hallway. Then, if his friends being hot wasn't weird enough, he realized with a start who the thin muscular guy was.

"Jackson. Jackson Whittemore? As in the Jackson Whittemore who shoved my Batman figure down the toilet?"

Stiles shook his head incredulously at Scott, like he had been personally victimized by the very thought of his seating partner, and Scott buried his face in his hands. Allison laughed, a musical sound that he had heard about in many different phone calls.

"You shoved his Batman down the toilet?"

Jackson smirked, shrugging slightly.

"Poor guy. So you were always a dick," Erica teased, peeking over the lip of her glass of water.

"We were like 6. I'm sure he's fine," Jackson said, leveling Stiles with a less than pitying glare.

Stiles muttered the contrary gruffly under his breath.

"You sure look tasty. Why didn't you tell us he was so fine, Scott?"

Stiles flushed at the blonde's words, not knowing how to comment to that. He looked to Scott for help, but he just shrugged as if to say, "she's always like this."

The man beside Erica, Boyd if Stiles recalled correctly, rolled his eyes, a knowing look on his face. He wrapped his arm around her and whispered something to her that made her giggle in delight, and Stiles was kind of scared to know what he said to make that noise come out of her.

Stiles, shifted back and forth on his feet, still standing awkwardly near the table holding his tray. He looked at the spot beside Scott, unsure. Out of everything he had prepared for today, this definitely wasn't it.

"You going to sit down Stilinski?" Jackson sneered.

"Actually I was thinking of enjoying my food standing up," Stiles shot back, biting into his roll dramatically. "I'd hate for anything else I love to end up in the toilet."

Scott grabbed the back of his jacket and pulled him down onto the bench with strength Stiles didn't know he had. He scowled but kept his mouth closed.

"Well, it's nice to meet you Stiles," Allison said. "Scott talks about you a lot. Like a lot a lot."

"Well isn't that a coincidence, because-" Scott jabbed him in the ribs as hard as he could under the table. Allison smiled bashfully and Lydia rolled her eyes.

"Ow! Stupid overnight muscles," Stiles muttered, rubbing his side. "Not fair."

"You know you aren't going to be eligible for Valedictorian or Salutatorian right?" Lydia asked suddenly, clamping her compact mirror shut. "The policy is that you have to be present for the entirety of your Junior and Senior year to qualify."

Stiles shrugged, trying to keep his overeager inner 9 year old self at bay. "Yeah my dad wasn't thrilled about that, but I told him I didn't care. My GPA is all that really matters. Well, that and my SATs and ACTs."

Lydia gave him an adorable half smile. "Its a shame. It will be nice to have some competition around, regardless. Scott says you're quite the diligent student."

Stiles gave Scott a look that he was too busy ogling to notice. That was strange. That was the second time they mentioned Scott talking about him, yet he knew nothing about any of them. "Is that right?"

Lydia quirked her head, looking between the two, and made a mental note of it.

The rest of lunch went by fairly smoothly, but Stiles couldn't really focus on the various conversations going on around the table, too busy trying to figure everyone out. He could tell that obviously Erica and Boyd were a couple, despite the remark about his attractiveness. Even surrounded by friends, and them frequently chatting with other people instead of each other, he could almost see the personal bubble they had around themselves, so thick it was almost tangible.

From what he could see, Allison and Lydia seemed to be best friends. He wasn't exactly surprised, pretty people always seemed to attract other pretty people, but the vibes they gave off were very different. They were constantly having silent conversations between themselves, checking for opinions as they listened to other people's stories and laughing at inside jokes together. Luckily for Scott, he noticed her eyes would stray over to him frequently, especially when he would start to laugh over something silly.

The most interesting observation seemed to be that while Stiles was away, Scott, Jackson and Isaac had gotten pretty close. Stiles didn't really remember much about Isaac, but he seemed nice enough. He was actually a lot like Stiles in that he was fairly smart, sarcastic, and generally nice to be around, but he had a air of newly self-built confidence around him.

Jackson was the opposite, but to Stiles' surprise, he wasn't as bad as he remembered. Jackson exuded cockiness, that he expected, but he could tell that Jackson was a lot less of a jerk than he used to be when he handed the rest of his food to Isaac before he even had the chance to ask for it. Stiles figured he would be the hardest one to understand, because nothing he said was actually what he meant.

Stiles' thoughts were interrupted when Scott tried to reel Stiles into a conversation about lacrosse, but Stiles was contented to listen to the three guys recap the season so far.

Stiles gradually started feeling a bit more comfortable than he had in the beginning, but something kept nagging at him in the back of his mind: why had Scott told his friends so much about him, yet Stiles was clueless about them? He had heard about Allison, mostly because that was all he talked about, but why hadn't he ever heard of his friendships with the others, especially after Stiles found out he was going to be moving back? They all seemed close. Really, really close. They talked about hanging out on weekends, going to movies, and playing video games all weekend, yet Stiles couldn't remember a single time Scott ever mentioned them.

It was strange. Stiles knew that it was crazy of him to make assumptions from a few passing comments, but something in his gut told him Scott was hiding something.

"Do you have any classes with us?" Isaac asked, holding out his hand expectantly. Stiles shifted so he could pull his schedule from his back pocket and handed it to him. Isaac and Allison looked over it intently, and Jackson snuck a peek, trying and failing to look like he didn't care.

"Chemistry with Scott and Isaac, Math with Scott and Erica, most of the classes with Boyd or Erica if not both, AP classes with Me and Lydia. How did you manage not to have a single class with Jackson?" Allison asked.

"Lucky I guess," Stiles grinned.

Jackson rolled his eyes and Scott elbowed him again. Stiles sucked in air through his teeth and rubbed it until the pain faded. #WorthIt.

"So Scott said your dad is the new Sheriff," Boyd said. It was the first time Boyd had spoken out loud.

"Yeah, he was a deputy here when we lived here before. I guess enough people remembered him from back in the day that when he was nominated, people accepted him."

"Did he tell you how the position opened up?"

Everyone at the table stopped, and eyes were on him. If they were trying to seem subtle, they had definitely failed. Fortunately, though, this Stiles had anticipated. He considered whether he should divulge his true opinions or keep his ideas to himself. After an encouraging nod from Scott, he shrugged.

"Dad told me what they are telling people happened, yeah," he said.

Boyd's flitted to Scott, then he forced a small smile.

"You say that like you don't believe the story."

"I don't."

Boyd looked at him expectantly, as if waiting for him to elaborate. Erica squeezed his arm gently, not tearing her eyes from Stiles, keeping her expression soft. Scott gave him a look and Stiles relented.

Stiles sighed. "My Dad is going to kill me." He looked up to the ceiling as if he were praying for strength to survive. "They are saying it was a mugging or something near the park. That the guy was at the wrong place at the wrong time, got his stuff taken and killed for his trouble."

"That's what I heard too. Sounds reasonable enough, right?" Allison asked, laughing nervously.

Stiles scoffed. "Sure, if he was getting mugged by Wolverine. I haven't seen the crime scene photos yet, but from the conversations I've heard the last few days about the absolute carnage left behind, I don't see how it could be just a simple mugging. They're missing something, they just don't want to admit it yet."

Stiles pretended not to notice Scott tensing beside him. It was no secret Scott wasn't a fan of blood, but he didn't want to embarrass him by pointing it out.

"What does that even mean?" Lydia asked.

"What does what mean?"

"Mugged by Wolverine?"

"Wolverine. You know. X-Men. Wolver-you don't-you don't know who Wolverine is?" Stiles asked, his hands flailing then falling flat on the table, his eyebrows furrowed in distress.

She gave him an incredulous look, her perfect curls bouncing as she shook her head. He ran his hand down his face.

Jackson handed Lydia his phone and her lips turned down. "Man in tights. Not bad."

Allison rolled her eyes and the bell rang, signaling the end of lunch.

"Nice to meet you, again, Stiles," Allison said again, grabbing her bag and pulling it over her shoulder.

"Yeah, yeah, it was truly a pleasure. I need to borrow your calculator so let's go," Jackson said, ushering her away. Scott huffed beside him, and Stiles rolled his eyes. Scott was as oblivious as always.

*****

Everything was messed up.

Cora honestly couldn't decide which was worse, living states away with a bunch of strangers that she couldn't get along with to save her life, or finally being able to come home and dealing with all the frivolous drama that came with it.

Don't get her wrong, she was glad that Derek allowed her to come back home. She loved him and she was really glad that finally someone was starting to treat her like an adult, but having to deal with school and her brother's complicated Pack dynamics was stressful.

Being back home was annoying. Living in South America was worse.

Being away from her home, the last bit of family she had left, it had almost killed her. She didn't want to eat. She couldn't sleep. When she did sleep, it was interrupted by nightmares. Often times she would wake up in the dark, thinking the smoke had enveloped her completely. If that weren't enough, she felt more isolated than she had in her whole life. She was the only human in the Pack, which she was used to, but at least when she was home she was bonded with her family.

She sat in the library, head in her hands, trying not to think about all of the homework assignments that were piling up. Derek had said school was one of the conditions to her moving back in with him, but what exactly did that mean? What was he going to do when she got her grades back? Was he going to ship her back off like Laura had? Would he even feel bad?

She sighed. That wasn't fair. Derek had never wanted her to go, but when Laura decided on something, there wasn't really anything anyone could do to change her mind. As much as Cora didn't want to, she was going to have to talk to him. Good thing talking about feelings was a Hale family specialty.

When the bell rang for lunch, she rolled her eyes. As if her brother and his Pack didn't have enough to argue about, Scott's token human friend was supposed to have his first day today. Not that she wasn't curious what all the hype was about, but she didn't understand why Scott was fighting so hard to let his friend in on all their secrets when he was constantly pointing out how dangerous it was to let Cora stay here.

So, just to spite him, she was here, continuing to work on homework she didn't know how to do, and was too stubborn to ask for help with.

Before she knew it, lunch was over with only a little bit of progress to show for it. She walked begrudgingly to Chemistry, knowing that Harris was probably going to pester her about her revisions from their lab the previous week.

Cora walked to her spot, sitting down, dramatically opening her Chemistry book. Her up and coming best friend, Nina, nudged her with her shoulder has she settled in beside her.

"Did you hear there was a new senior?"

"Unfortunately," She replied icily, pulling a snack from her bag. Nina gave her an odd look. She interpreted it as "what the fuck is up with you?" despite the fact that Nina would never actually use those words. "Apparently he's going to be hanging around my brother's group."

"Oh," Nina smirked, knowingly. "The Hot Hale Harem?"

Cora almost choked on her granola bar, making Nina's smirk grow to a full on grin. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

"You love me."

Cora rolled her eyes, but she couldn't help but laugh with her. Nina was different, but she honestly found it kind of refreshing. It was hard for her to remember to think about normal things like boys and shopping, but Nina didn't mind pulling her into her normie girl stuff.

"So, I was thinking," Nina started.

Cora took a deep breath. "No."

"You didn't even hear what I was going to say," she pouted.

"Fine. It'll still be a no, but continue."

"So you know how we have that test on Friday? I was thinking we could invite the guys to study with us."

(Find the rest on AO3 href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27811303"><strong>The Unshaped</strong></a> (16100 words) by <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/Infernal_panda"><strong>Infernal_panda</strong></a><br />Chapters: 2/?<br />Fandom: <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/tags/Teen%20Wolf%20(TV)">Teen Wolf (TV)</a><br />Rating: Not Rated<br />Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence<br />Relationships: Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski, Allison Argent/Scott McCall, Vernon Boyd/Erica Reyes<br />Characters: Stiles Stilinski, Derek Hale, Scott McCall (Teen Wolf), Isaac Lahey, Lydia Martin, Jackson Whittemore, Vernon Boyd, Erica Reyes, Sheriff Stilinski, Melissa McCall, Peter Hale, Cora Hale, Laura Hale<br />Additional Tags: BAMF Stiles, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Pining, Underage Drinking, Fluff, Angst, Fluff and Angst, Romance, Friendship, Humor, Slow Burn, Slow Build, Supernatural Elements, mentions of abuse, eventually, Happy Ending<br />Summary: <p>After leaving Beacon Hills at age 8, Stiles never stopped feeling the indescribable pull, beckoning him back home. A new Sheriff position opening up gives him the chance to move back, and it’s everything Stiles ever wanted. He has his dad, his best friend, and he’s back where he belongs. </p><p>His first day back doesn’t exactly go as planned, and now he is finding that he was even less normal than he thought. </p><p>****</p><p>A Hale Pack fanfic with all of our lovable characters as they try to integrate Stiles into their wolfyhood and crazy monster-filled lives with Stiles as their unknowing magic friend, and a bit of intertwined fates to keep things interesting )

[jising-jisang-jisung]

Truth or Dare | Kim Seungmin

Genre: fluff

Word count: 1.9k

A/n: hi I did this instead of everything else I was supposed to do and I think it's really cute and I love Seungmin and I hope you like it

"Cmon y/n, when will you confess to Seungmin?" Your friend, Kate taunted you again. She has been on your case ever since you filled her in on your little crush. She only knows that you've liked him since freshman year, but really it's been since like 7th grade. "It's senior year, what's the worst that could happen if you confess? You move away in a few months and never have to experience the awkwardness of seeing each other everyday? How awful." You don't laugh at her joke, so Kate takes that as a sign that it's time to change the subject. "Well, yknow how my birthday is in like 2 weeks. My mom is letting me have a party with my friends and she won't even have to be there to supervise. Since I'll be an adult and all!" She emphasizes adult as if being 18 suddenly makes her mature.

"Sounds great, Kate," you rhyme. You're hardly paying attention because something, or rather someone, caught your attention. "I'll see you after class," and then you're off to math while Kate had biology. She definitely noticed how hard you were staring at Seungmin while she was talking with you. Of course, you know nothing of what's to come.

~

"Hey! Felix!"

"What's up, Kate?" Felix was friends with Seungmin and some other boys. He also tended to be seen with Kate. Most people just assumed they were dating, and maybe they were, not even they know for sure.

"I'm having a birthday party next weekend and you and your friends are invited! Especially Seungmin." She adds a wink with the last statement.

"Will Miss y/n be there?"

"Of course. Why do you think I'm specifying for Seungmin?"

"It's so painfully obvious that he likes her so why can't he make a move already?!"

"Y/n is no different," Kate admits. "That's why I have a plan."

~

"H-hey y/n, " Seungmin stutters as he sits in his seat next to you.

"Oh, hi," you manage to reply, blush evident throughout your face.

"Um, did you get number 27 on the homework? I was super confused."

"Yeah, the equation for that one is different than the others because..." you explained the concept to Seungmin while he stared at your face unbeknownst to you. "Does that make sense?"

"Yes. I get it now!" He smiles and you actually die. You caught a glance at his homework to see number 27 done correctly but you were to affected by his smile to put two and two together.

~

All the days seemed to be same, passing by until it was finally Kate's birthday party. Obviously you went super early to help her set up. There was no alcohol allowed since her mom said she would let her throw it all by herself under that one condition, not that Kate would ever underage drink anyway we are good children here.

Kate left to answer the door as you pulled some cookies out of the oven. "Kate! Happy birthday!" You heard Felix's voice ring through the entryway. You weren't surprised she invited him, but then you heard more voices.

"Your house looks really nice."

"Happy birthday, Kate."

"Where should I put this gift?" Your eyes widened. You could recognize that voice anywhere.

"Kate! Can you come here for a moment?" You shouted for her.

"What's up, buttercup? Are the cookies okay?"

"I can't believe you invited Seungmin. Bro, I thought we were cool." You overreacted.

"Chill, y/n, all his friends are here, along with our friends. There's so many people, don't even worry about it." She tries to reassure you.

"Well... do I at least look okay?" You ask shyly.

"Look fine to me." You jump at the boy's voice. "But I suppose I'm not the one you want to look good for."

"Jisung, you scared the crap out of me," Kate smiles as you nearly died of embarrassment. Had he heard your whole conversation?

"No. Only the last part." He answers. It's only then that you realize you asked that out loud. You face palmed with bright red cheeks as more boys filed into the kitchen.

~

"Now that everyone is here, let's get this party started!" Kate announces as she turns on some speakers and blasts some upbeat music. She and Felix dance on the coffee table while everyone else is jumping around on the couches and dancing on the floor. The mess of people was starting to become overwhelming when you felt someone push you from behind. Unluckily, you fell directly into Seungmin's arms.

"Wow. Falling for me this early in the night. I hate to say I'm not surprised, y/n," Seungmin says in a low tone. "I'm just kidding," he quickly adds when he sees your eyes bulging out of your head.

"Oh, yeah. Right! Haha! So sorry I fell into you. There are so many people."

"Since I have you here, wanna dance?" He smiles again. How could anyone say no to his perfect smile?

"I'm sorry what was that?" He looks confused, like a puppy.

"I said yes!" You lie trying to cover up your thoughts that you must've spoken out loud, again. You and Seungmin begin to jump around, laughing. Kate gives you a knowing look which you return with a glare. Little did you know Felix and Seungmin were in the same boat.

~

"What else do you have planned?" Felix asks sounding very rehearsed.

"Hmm. Why don't we play truth or dare?!" Kate suggests. That was not on the schedule you had for the night's events. You knew something bad was going to happen when Kate smiled your way.

Everyone sat criss cross applesauce in a circle and Jisung volunteered to start. "Minho, truth or dare?"

"Dare." The boy responds with a brave look in his eye.

"I dare you to," he pauses, thinking of something good, "do a sexy dance for everyone."

"Pff. Okay." Minho continues to grind on the ground, not minding the looks he's getting at all. In fact, Jisung had to stop him, because it was getting too out of hand too quickly.

"I didn't dare you to strip, MinHOE!"

"Whatever, you know you liked it," he teased back. "Hmm let's see. Kate, truth or dare?"

"Uh, I'll pick truth."

"Do you like Felix?"

She furrows her eyebrows together, looking confused. "Felix and I are dating. So, to clarify, yes I like him very much." Everyone is so lost as to how they hadn't known that the two were official. I mean, y'all obviously could see that they liked each other duh. "Felix, truth or dare?"

"Dare." He adds a wink to Kate.

"I dare you to kiss me." The crowd shouts a bunch of ews and grosses as Felix briefly pecks Kate's lips.

He turns to Seungmin with a devilish look. "Seungmin, truth or dare?"

He must not have been paying attention yeah cuz he was admiring you face again whore because he is completely oblivious to the grin on Felix's face right now. "Why not? Dare."

"I dare you to kiss y/n" Felix sticks his tongue out at Seungmin as everyone turns to look at you. You tried so hard to keep your face from looking like a tomato but you knew it was no use. Seungmin gulped as he stared at you.

"I- I can't." His words made you frown without thinking. "Y/n, should have a say in this too. I can't just kiss her without her consent," he elaborates.

"Fine then," Felix speaks again. "I dare you to go up to Kate's room alone with y/n. Anything you two might do in there is all up to both of your consents." Felix smirks at you and then back to Seungmin. You both kept eye contact as you stood to head to your friend's bedroom. There were lots of hoots and hollers following you two as you made your way up the stairs with faces painted with crimson shades.

~

You both sat on Kate's bed. You face was on fire even more now because he was so close. When I mean close,, like your legs were nearly /touching/. And you can't handle being so /close/ to your big phat crush. However, the feeling seemed somewhat mutual for Seungmin.

"Do you like me?" You squeaked out. It was completely random and Seungmin even flinched slightly at the sound of your voice.

"..." the boy stayed silent and you refused to meet his gaze.

"ohmygosh that was so rude of me to just ask. I'm sorry. Just forget I said anything." You began to get up to walk away when he grabbed your wrist.

"Do you- like me?"

"..." it was your turn to mimick the silence you'd not heard moments earlier.

"Did we both not say anything for the same reason?" You opened your mouth to respond when the door opened, revealing Jeongin.

"I was told to come make sure you two weren't doing anything," he narrows his eyes on Seungmin, "gross." You both sat there like deer in head lights. Jeongin looked at your hand and then back at Seungmin. You hadn't noticed that Seungmin's and your pinkies had been laced until Jeongin's judgy stare pointed it out. "Also, you are both welcome to rejoin the party." The younger boy smiled and walked back down the stairs without a care in the world.

~

"Wow look who's back," Jisung announced. "You two didn't have too much fun did you?"

"Don't be icky!" Jeongin defended you. "They weren't even talking to one another when I walked in. But- they were basically holding hands!"

"Not true! He's lying!" Seungmin shouts back. You laugh, looking down to see that you, in fact still had your pinkies intertwined. You broke away and returned to your seat to continue the game.

"Anyway, it's my turn," Hyunjin claims. "Seungmin, truth or dare?"

"Me already again?" He looks a bit freaked out before taking a breath and choosing, "truth."

"Wrong choice, buddy. Do you like y/n?"

He makes deliberate eye contact with you as he answers the question. "Yes. Y/n, pick truth."

"Truth." Everything was happening so quick, you didn't have time to react to what Seungmin was even saying before you responded.

"Do I have your consent this time?" It took a moment for you to figure out what he meant. When you put together that he was asking if he could kiss you, you shook your head quickly. He wasted no time before softly pressing his lips to yours. They were sweet like honey and warm and soft and you thought you could get lost in the moment forever. That is, until he pulled away. It was much to soon for your liking, until you remembered where you were. You both looked around to see everyone's jaws dropped in shock. You timidly smiled and your friends began to cheer. They were soon followed by Seungmin's friends screaming, Jeongin in particular.

Needless to say, you remember very little of what happened after that moment at the party. All you do know is that your friends set you up and Seungmin's friends set him up and now you two are in love. Senior year sure was going to be interesting.

[blizzardfluffykpop]

Jinyoung x reader

Summary: Can being friends with your crush really be that bad? ((Based)) off a true story)

One-shot maybe more?

You know the thing about being in love with your friend is weird? You don't know exactly where you stand you don't know if they are just trying harder to become your best friend or if they actually like you. That's how it's been. I for one hate it. So much.

My best friend group consists of Mark, Jackson, and Bambam. How I got involved with these twats I don't even know. I just remember being friendless and then they all became my friends like a happy symphony. Yeah, there are days when I want to totally beat their guts in as they do mine. But I'm the mellow one if the group that's how it's always been and always will be. I'm like the chaotic neutral, Jackson the chaotic good, Bambam the chaotic evil, and Mark is just our good neutral.

Evidently Mark and I became the closest. And there are some days when I want to rip his head off, so I attach to either Bambam or Jackson. Which 7 times out of 10 I end up in one of their arms sprawled out. It's normal. You'd be surprised everyone actually thinks a lot of bad with me, but I just let it roll off my shoulders because four years ago I couldn't even dream of having friend and now that I do, I don't care what people think. Because I'm not as lonely as I once was. When the four of them found out I crushed on Jinyoung they weren't shocked they thought it was cute though.

You see Jinyoung transferred to our college just recently and that's the only time I really see him sadly. He was going to an academy I believe but now he's going to the school for musical arts like the four of us are. I had meet him through math class he sat next to me. He could have chosen many different places when he was introduced but he chooses my little table.

I had introduced him to my group of friends, and he was grateful to meet them which I thought was cute and he had 3 friends from the academy that were probably going to transfer which was neat. What made me sad and caused me a floo of emotions was when I asked him so do you like anyone and he was like, 'ooh I like so and so' to be honest I forced that name out of my head but if she was standing in a crowd of people, I could pick her out with ease.

This had thrown me to find other options. I didn't realize why I was falling for so many people until later that I was trying to get over him. I had fallen for so many people it's like they're name was a blur and I said Well I like, 'Yugyeom' when I really didn't he was like the little brother I always wanted. And he was like, 'oh okay cool' through and through I knew I liked him but for some reason it wasn't clicking that I didn't like anyone else above one another when I was looking over that one person named Jinyoung.

He was what I always wanted. I realized that the next year and my feelings really developed to the point it was, 'oh I really do like him'. And for some odd reason that little floo of crushes that I had didn't click with me for some reason until it was the second semester and Jinyoung and I were in Math again together. And it clicked with us and pissed us off so much that we didn't see what was straight in front of us the whole time. That we actually really liked him over all the other people that I had liked. No, he was the one that I really liked.

My heart really liked him even though my brain didn't make the correlation for some reason my heart did. It saw through me the whole time no matter what I did.

It hurt when I could no longer talked to Mark on a daily. Why? Because he got a boyfriend who? Jackson. Yeah, Bambam and I are the single ones, so we grew closer, and I ended up instead of my daily calls to Mark about my problems and he talks about his. Bambam was the same way with Jackson so instead we grew really close with ease.

I had told Bambam at one point when we were all playing spin the bottle over at Jisoo's party when Mark took my first kiss and then Bambam kissed me Jackson couldn't make it to the party he was sick. Mark kissed Jisoo and we all thought they were going to end up together turns we all had ships for everyone. Like Mark shipped Bambam and me while Jackson shipped Mark and I even though he liked Mark. I shipped Mark and Jackson before it was canon and so did Bambam.

And when they collectively found out that I liked Jinyoung they were slightly shocked but to them it made sense. I don't understand why? But like he was different from all the guys I ever liked. And when Bambam started dating Jisoo I was ticked in the single one out of the group you got to be shitting me.

Then it became the groups, goal to get me with someone. Ooh and you know that ticked me off. Because it was, they're goal to get me with someone. And you know who that someone was. And they were telling me and I mean all off them different ways of confessing to him. And I was like if I'm really going to confess to him, I'll do it my own way fite me. Jisoo nearly hit me for that remark saying they were just trying to help but it felt like they were trying to push me into the grave before I was ready.

It's been quite lonely, so I've attached myself more to Jinyoung. I'm a cuddly person so he became my hugging buddy or the person I could lean on with ease. The way he avoided the topic of love made me feel a little odd because last year he was open about it. And now it's just like huh?

They are maybe little signs that he likes me but there is no way in hell you are risking getting rejected because it's hurt so many times not so great coping mechanisms lead to losing inner peace I had. That leaves me where I am now.

Feeling terrible but still passing math with ease. The final for the dance class was coming up soon so other grades didn't really matter. I was struggling to keep up with my homework, but I was still getting it done but with living with those 4 idiots it becomes annoying. I'm not saying Jisoo who recently moved in is an idiot in saying she's annoying there isn't much a difference though. Haha especially when you are trying to study, and you hear things you don't want to because both the couple's are always trying to outdo each other's moans so studying becomes practically impossible.

Thus, I started going to Jinyoung's place to get some peace and quiet to study because we have mostly the same class but at different times. We started studying together his academy friends live with him. Which was Yugyeom, Jaebum, and Youngjae. And they are calm buy man does Yugyeom have a death wish from the both of us.

How I this happened is I was complaining about how I got no sleep or studying in and Jinyoung asked me "Why?" and I said, "The 4 of them are trying to out fuck each other getting louder by the minute making it impossible to sleep or study." And he was like, "Hey you wanna come over to my place to study cause the guys don't have girlfriends or boyfriends so they won't make a ruckus." He just really offered it so I took him up on it and this is where we are now.

I come over after my last class, which is about the time, he is over, so I just knock and by now Yugyeom is the one who answers, and he just throws it open knowing who it is and greets me. And when he doesn't I yell, "Hey!! Respect your elders, you child." And after I'm having my mini little fite with him Jinyoung arrives and sees me and walks over dropping his stuff down.

When Yugyeom starts teasing about something and I don't really pay attention because I can only really stare at how beautiful he is. Jinyoung bats at him that's when I shake out of it. Not like actually shake, but mentally because then it give way that I was actually thinking something.

He sits across from me at the dinner table and we start talking about our day and then we get to studying. Then for some reason I had this surge of confidence because I know he was going to ask my about my science notes cause he sucks at taking notes in the class. So at the bottom I write quickly mind you, "This is a surge of confidence. I have liked you for a while and all those crushes was to fill a gap in my heart and cover up the wound because I liked you so much that when you said you liked someone else. But throughout the whole time I didn't realize I really liked you and then I made the connections this year and yeah... I have a big crush on you I can't believe my heart wouldn't tell my brain that... But it finally did. So?" As I finally finish that sentence off he's like, "Did you do your science notes?"

"Yeah, need them?"

"You know I do"

"I know I'm kidding" I chuckle a bit. He rolls his eyes and I hand them over it's then I realize I just spilled my heart out on that poor paper what will happen when he reads it...

He's been copying them for about an hour because that's how long it always takes considering it's two pages and a lot to take in. I 'study' my note--lie--actually I was having a heart attack and trying to come over it by faking.

When I hear him get up... And I feel he's going to send me out the door to go back to my fiends of friends place to study and sort my life out. Leave me and will just continue to he friends nothing more. And I guess it's time to wallow in self pity as I stare into a paragraph of words that don't comprehend in my head. Not making words off the sheet of paper that I had once knew what it all said.

When I feel my chin pulled up and he looks me in the eyes, "Are you serious about that last paragraph?"

"Y-yeah..." and without further ado he kisses me full on the lips. I was in a state of shock but eventually got my wits back together and kissed him back. I'm going to be really pissed if I wake up foe this to be a dream. If it is I am stomping my way all the way to Jinyoung's and kissing him on the lips at this point it no longer matters this has to be a reality or I quit.

He pulls away, "please tell me this is real" he looks though my eyes, "I really hope so to if not I'm kissing you full on when I wake up"

It turns out it wasn't a dream when we started kissing again and Youngjae started squealing like a kid and took one too many pictures of us. But you know I kept most of them. And he's my little screen saver to everything. "I love you" I whisper into the shell of his ear and into my hair he mumbles that he loves me too.