#you’re a real one if you get that ref 😉

[aquateenpatrolsomethingshowshow]

another new [adult swim] athf bump that aired after last night’s aqua teen premiere

[hasmephydoneanythingwrong]

I need to do better justice to that Pretender Meph post. Man, it has been one hot second. Presenting,

Bruce's Big Pretender Meph Essay

Just a fair warning that this essay will be less serious than the last one, I wanted to get sillay with it.

Content warning for repetition and themes of identity under the cut.

So, let’s start with the obvious question: what is a Pretender?

According to the Type-Moon wiki, every Class has, so to speak, a subtitle. Caster is “Magus and Heroic Spirit of Spells and Sorcery,” Rider is “Mounted Knight and Heroic Spirit of the Mount,” Moon Cancer is “the Irregular Who Threatens the World of the Moon,” yada yada yada yada yada. Well, according to Nasu, the Pretender “subtitle” is “One Who Wears a Role.”

Pretender-class Heroic Spirits are people who gained fame under a false alias. Vigilantes like Zorro do not count. To be a Pretender, you can’t let people know that you’re not who they think you are.

Enter the scrimblo. The scroingle. The scrunkly mippy. Have you ever wondered why someone who introduces themself as The Devil™, Ya Know, From Da Theater (/ref) isn’t up there with the game’s Divine Spirits in terms of strength?

Because we’re not looking at the devil.

Who would’ve thunk?? Certainly no one at launch! Do we know anything about Meph underneath that hot, hot demon persona? No!

According to Holmes, Pretenders “deceiv[e] and mislead… others to do great deeds.” I have said it before with my Christmas Meph idea, but Mephistopheles’ major character concept is that of someone who props themself up as the ultimate evil for humanity to overcome!

In addition, Holmes describes Pretenders as “[those] who deceives even the soul until more power and greater achievements than the real thing remain.” Given that Heroic Spirits are essentially familiars born of souls long since passed, what else could you call the effects of Innocent Monster? Check out that screenshot again. “Past and existence twisted,” huh? Why🙃does that 🙃sound🙃so🙃familiar??🙃🙃🙃

“But Bruce, there’s no indication that was intentional in-universe!” I will admit, that’s a good point! However! [I place a brochure in front of you.]

If you would kindly flip to the “Speech Examples” section, there is one part in particular that simply cannot be ignored!

“Make the name of Mephistopheles my True Name!”

(Thank you to u/Kinalvin for translating!)

This line keeps me up at night. It’s the phrasing, the implication that Mephisto is bothered by the whole thing. In addition! Consider this line from the “Historical/Character Image” section:

“I… was born to be a Servant.”

A regular homunculus wouldn’t be noteworthy or ancient enough to be a Heroic Spirit, but the devil?? What better match could there be?

And just for fun, someone pointed this out before (unfortunately, I can’t find the post), but

Horns. ¯\_😉_/¯

And they are verrrrry similarly shaped.

[princesstillyenna]

I am in need of two alignment charts that I feel you would be well suited for:

One for the nhl mascots

One for the group chat boys (TK and EJ can tie for chaotic good)

Wait you mean like... trad style DnD alignment charts??? This is going to be so fucking contraversial so I wanna make sure y'all know BEFORE you see this THIS IS THEIR GROUP CHAT PERSONAS OK???? This does NOT reflect their On Ice personas (although some are influenced by their On Ice Personas)

OK because I know you're mad about some of those Cale is Lawful Good, because he is a good boy who follows all the rules and will follow the spirit of the rules just to make you happy and hates making people sad Dylan is Neutral Good, because he wants everyone to be happy but also he will break the rules if it's funny enough and he does have a tendency to take a joke too far Matty is Chaotic Good, he will do whatever it takes to make the people in his life happy, possibly to the detriment of others, but if you're one of his people, he will fight tooth and nail for you. The rules do not apply to Matthew ESPECIALLY when it comes to making the people in his life happy. Sid is Lawful Neutral which to me has always been the embodiment of "I will follow your rules to the LETTER which includes finding any loopholes which may or may not benefit me" he won't outright BREAK the rules but if he feels they don't apply to him, he'll find a really clever way around them and then end up being the reason the rules have to be rewritten. Connor is True Neutral - sorry Connor, I KNOW YOU HAVE A PERSONALITY I just thought this was too funny not to. He's the middle man in every single argument ever. Eddie is Chaotic Neutral, no explanation needed. I challenge any of you to argue with that one tbh. Carter Is Lawful Evil - ok, hear me out on this one, Carter will always follow the rules, but if he can follow the rules in such a way that makes the people around him deeply uncomfortable... he absolutely will. I'll do you a snippet to follow this to explain why. But he just is. On the rare occasions he DOES break the rules, he will flirt with the refs (or whoever is in charge of the rules) until they eventually admit that the rules were probably wrong and Carter is definitely not a bad person.... 100% lawful evil there. Gabe is Neutral Evil: Gabe has his OWN AGENDA ok, and nothing matters except HIS AGENDA. His agenda includes (but is not limited to), Jeff and Eric getting married and letting him be best man, Tyson NEVER HAVING A RELATIONSHIP because Gabe doesn't like the idea that Tyson could love someone more than he loves Gabe but at the same time, Gabe is well aware he doesn't love Tyson back, Sid never retiring and moving to Denver because then he would get less Nate time and probably less EJ time too... Basically, in Gabe's world it is Gabe Landeskog first, and everybody else second. EVIL. (Please note, this is group chat Gabe not real life Gabe, I'm sure real life Gabe is a sweetheart... also I'm not sure WHY gc gabe is Evil, he just is) And finally, Chaotic Evil is EJ, obviously, because he lives by the mantra of "Is it Funny and Horny, if so, DO IT" because... EJ. I honestly think that one is pretty sound also... OK finally, before I go, a snippet from the GC that happened some time in the past Hartsy: Behave!

Cale:😳😳 Sorry sir ☹

EJ: OK, new GC rule, YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO CALL YOU BOYFRIEND SIR IN THE GROUP CHAT

TBeauts: SECONDED

Gabe: THIRDED FOURTHED AND FIFTHED

TK: Yeah I’m with the Avs on this one. Nope

Cale: IT WAS AN ACCIDENT 😭😭😭😭

Cale: I am sorry ☹ I didn’t mean to make you guys feel uncomfortable

Hartsy: It’s ok bb, I know it was an accident

Hartsy: And not calling me Sir in the gc is a perfectly reasonable rule to set 😊

Hartsy: … I’ve never had a problem with you calling me Daddy instead 😉

EJ: CLAUDE GIROUX COME GET YOUR BOY

Claude: If you think I’m not eating popcorn while I read this you’re wrong

Claude: Hartsy I’m so fucking proud of you

Danny: Hey Clo…..

Claude: Yeah?

Danny: That’s our boy that is :D

Danny: #TeamProudDad

Claude: 🤣🤣🤣 (OH P.S. I HAVE A MASCOT PHOBIA I'M NOT DOING THE MASCOT ONE)