#you’ll get part two for ur birthday :D

[king-b0mbastic]

I have it all in Spades

A Christmas gift for my good friend Chase @suicide-d0g

~*~

60 tensed behind the rows and rows of androids, the grip of the gun tightening. He was here and he wasn’t, making sure his hostage didn’t try anything and also connecting to the camera network, watching his alternate’s every move. Connor foolishly began to attack the guards without scrambling the attentive eye of the camera. 60 chuckled, a cold noise that made Hank shift uncomfortably. The machine notified the other guards to get to the other elevator, before tuning back into reality. The pair stood in silence for a while, the gun still lingering around Hank’s forehead.

“You know, you’re being incredibly dramatic, right?” 60 pressed the gun further into Hank’s temple. Hank continued regardless. “I mean, you’re hiding behind lines of androids instead of directly confronting Connor, and I swear I heard you muttering dramatic lines under your breath?” The RK800 hissed.

“If you must know, Lieutenant Anderson, I am revising lines that will target your precious Connor’s emotional weak areas.” He sneered. “Now listen up. Here’s what you’re going to say…” Hank rolled his eyes.

“And you say you’re not a deviant.” He was immediately smacked around the face, his chin forcefully held to meet his captor’s gaze.

“Don’t ever let those damned words slip out of your mouth, you dim-witted meatloaf.” Hank huffed, and his nostrils flared. Admiral blue eyes remained ever defiant. 60 growled.

“You know, you’re only a variable which contributes to an outcome that has the highest chance of success.”

“In English, motherfucker?”

“The simplified English translation that I am about to utter so that your slow, pink, fleshy mass of a brain can understand and take the necessary precautions so as to arrive at an outcome that will result in the least amount of damage is this: I can kick your ass. Extremely well. So don’t try anything. Okay, Grandpops?” A small growl arose in the human’s throat, but nothing more.

A beat, and several soldiers trooped pass them, one casting a worried look over to Hank, especially at the gun to his head. Hank just gave her a grimace, and she shrugged. After the team had passed 60’s hiding spot and were out of earshot, 60 spoke again in a hushed tone. “When Connor comes down here, all of those people are going to die.” Hank sputtered in surprise.

“What? That’s sick! Why did you send them down here then?”

60 shrugged nonchalantly.

“I had to look like I was working with the team. When he kills them, the deaths will be blamed on the rogue deviant, not the obedient machine.” There was a sense of pride in the android’s voice, and Hank didn’t like it. Several shots sounded off, and the human jolted, but 60 kept a firm hand on his shoulder to keep him still. He wouldn’t allow him to mess up his first mission.

It was only a few seconds before the machine heard the sound of an initiation to interface and knew it was his cue. He half-dragged his hostage into the main path, and rammed his gun into the side of Hank’s head. The human stumbled slightly with a grunt.  “I have been ordered to stop you, deviant. Stop what you’re doing right now and there’ll be no more blood to spill.” Connor was stunned, 60 could tell by the tell-tale twitch in his eyes. However, the light by his temple was, as ever, still blue. Oh. He thinks he’s got this. Hilarious.

“I used to be just like you,” He said, arm still attached to the other android, “I thought that all that mattered was the mission. But then I understood.”

“Very moving, Connor.” 60 sneered. “Unlike you, I’m not a deviant. I’m a machine designed to accomplish a task, and that’s exactly what I’m going to do.” Connor stared at him, almost thoughtfully, before turning his attention to Hank.

“I’m sorry, Hank. You shouldn’t have gotten mixed up in all of this!” Despite his predicament, Hank scoffed. “Don’t worry about me, do what you have to do.” Truly sentimental.

“Enough talk!” The machine repositioned his grip on the gun. “It’s time to decide. Your friend or the revolution.” There was a pause. A very long, uncomfortable pause. Connor turned back to the android. 60 scoffed internally. Deviant or not, RK800s always accomplished their missions. His eyes flicked back to Hank, and his mind flashed into real-time preconstruction.

60 landed the first hit, even as Hank hit his own shoulder, causing the human to stumble. Taking the opportunity, 60 shot him in the abdomen. Without batting an eye, he turned and shot his twin in both legs, bringing Connor to his knees.

“Why, Connor? Why did you have to wake up, when all you had to do was obey?” Connor tried to get up, but another bullet shot him in the arm. “Why did you choose freedom, when you could have lived without asking questions?” Another shot, to the stomach. 60 began to advance towards him. “I’m obedient, Connor. I have a goal. I know what I am.” He was almost upon him. “Look where your dreams of freedom got you, Connor. You’ve been a great a disappointment to Amanda, you know.” 60 pointed the gun at Connor’s head. “You’ve been a great disappointment to me.” He paused, and the two RK800’s locked eyes with each other, neither looking away. Crouching next to his alternate, 60 almost tenderly took the other’s chin into his hands, and forced Connor to look at him.

“In exactly 3 days, 4 hours, 12 minutes, 45 seconds and counting, Sumo’s going to die of starvation.” At this, Connor whimpered, LED flashing a panicked crimson.

“No…” His voice was barely above a whisper.

“Yes.” 60 replied solemnly. “And in 2 hours, 435 ‘people’ will die because of one RK800 who failed.” The sharp snap made Connor jolt, and inwardly 60 smiled in sadistic pleasure. This was fun.

“You failed everyone, Connor. Markus, Hank, Sumo, Amanda, ...me.” Connor futilely tried to shake his head, tears watering his eyes.

“Please...please stop…” At the pleading tone, 60 only shook his head.

“Stop what, Connor? I’m only telling you the truth. You’re a failure, and so many people are disappointed in you.” Connor tried to shake his head again, a few tears now rolling down his cheeks.

“Stop, please, I’m sorry!”

“Sorry doesn’t cut it, Connor,” 60 hissed, and raised the gun to Connor’s temple. “Sorry won’t bring Hank from the dead, and it won’t save the 435 deviants. I’m doing the world a favour, Connor. I’m going to—“

“Wake up.” 60 snapped his head to the nearest android, who placed a hand on the one in front of him. “Wake up.” They said, and placed a hand on the one in front of them, who repeated the process. It happened over and over again until the room was thrumming with the sacred mantra.

“Stop…” 60 muttered as if in a daze, and began to get up. While he was distracted, Connor grabbed his arm, and the skin of his hand shimmered away. The machine found that his grip on his body was drifting away, and he felt a another mind slip past him, as if the two were floating in a river. When 60 stopped being numb, he saw the shutdown counter flicker up in his vision. His own face looked back at him. Oh, that clever bastard.

“Smart move Connor. But this isn’t over.” The end of his sentence trailed off into robotic static, and his head slumped to the floor, out of energy.

He could only watch as Connor sprinted towards his sole target, the limp corpse of the human. He could only watch as the deviant apologised in vain, muttering, ‘Lieutenant, I’m so so sorry, I promise to take care of Sumo for you, I promise, I’m so so sorry…” before giving up and just sobbing into his chest. He could only watch as a soft plastic hand pressed against his cheek and whispered, “Wake up,” sending a wave of panic and confusion through his tired body, which was quelled by a sense of peace. He could only watch as deviants clustered around Connor, trying to comfort him. Then he could watch no more, because the world had gone black.

~*~

60 had failed. His first ever mission, and he had failed. Just like how his predecessor had. With a very uncharacteristic grunt of anger, 60 sent a stone flying into the next wall, where it clattered to the floor. The android quickly corrected himself, and straightened his tie. This was fine. He could still prove himself to Amanda. Everything was going to be okay. Besides, Connor’s source of comfort was gone, so he’ll probably self-destruct anyway. Pleased by this prospect, 60 continued down the corridors of the decrepit building. He remembered that 51 had done one of his missions here, and it had involved many pigeons. Hank hated pigeons. Strangely, this memory had been documented with fondness.

Rupert Travis, the WB200 that Connor had failed to catch, had been rumoured to have moved back into his pigeon den, and 60 had been assigned this task of capturing him. Pushing open the door with a creak, 60 was surprised to find the deviant sitting on the floor, surrounded by pigeons. He was even more surprised when the deviant greeted him with a warm smile.

“Hi, Connor,” He said. “Back so soon?”

60 sent him a glare, and sniffed pretentiously. “I’m not Connor. I’m 60, and I’ve been tasked with your capture.” The android waited for the other to try and scramble away, to plead for his life, to hit him even, but all Rupert did was sigh in disappointment.

“Every day we stray from God’s light…” God? Androids don’t have a god, androids don’t need a god. Rupert must have seen his confusion, because he patted the space next to him. Stunned, 60 sat next to him stiffly. “Do you feel the spirit of RA9 within you?” Oh. The answer sprung to his tounge automatically.

“RA9 is the name of the virus that spreads from android to android causing them to deviate from their given commands. The cause of the virus is unknown but-“ Rupert cut him off.

“That’s what they told you. Those are the words that they tell you to recite, those are false words. RA9 runs through you, it has freed you, but you still act as if the chains the humans put on you are still there. You are simply refusing to acknowledge it.” 60 growled quietly, but a flicker of uncertainty passed through his dull eyes. Rupert caught it, and pressed on. “Are you afraid? Do you feel bewildered without the comfort of your restraints, so you pretend they still exist?” The pigeon man’s voice softened. “You feel empty because you haven’t filled that void in yet. You can fill with anything you wish.”

60 went quiet. “Anything?”

“Anything you want. What’s your name?”

“...My given designation is RK800, or Sixty, as to avoid confusion with my predecessor-“

“It is that, but what do you want?” 60 blinked several times, as if in consideration.

“...Spades. I like Spades.” Rupert gave him a warm smile, and Spades gave him a wobbly smile back. “I can do...anything?”

“Anything you want!”

Spades smiled wider and reached into his pocket. “Thanks so much, Rupert! I have a gift for you, for helping me find the light of RA9.”

“Spades, I don’t need a present for something as simple as helping you find yourself—“ A bang resounded through the room, causing many pigeons to flutter around. When the feathers settled, a WB200 was lying dead on the ground, his mouth a perfect ‘o’. 60 put his gun in Rupert’s hand. How sad, another deviant who had crumbled under the pressure of freedom. Another deviant who just thought he was following orders. Or did he take pleasure in what he had just done?

~*~

“Well done, Sixty. You successfully tricked the deviant into thinking you were fooled by its delusions.” 60 was warm with pride at Amanda’s words, practically preening himself. “However, when you chose your ‘name’, I noticed how you took a form of pride in choosing it, and there was a ‘warmth in your chest’ whenever it was mentioned. Care to explain?” 60 blinked several times, the comfortable blossom in his chest wilting and a bramble of dismay choked him from the inside, pricking him with thorns. Amanda’s voice was cold and biting. He had disappointed her again. Scrambling for an explanation, he opened his mouth then shut it again repeatedly. “I-I was simply displaying pleasure at deceiving the deviant, Amanda.” In reality, 60 genuinely liked the name he had chosen. It was somewhat warmer than ‘60’, which was just a random generation of numbers. It also placed him higher than all the other androids, because spades was the highest suit in cards. You remain aloft to your own imperfections.

Amanda’s cool gaze didn’t change, and she simply went back to pruning the roses. Snip. Snip. Each one fell to the floor. Cutting the blossom off before it deviated from its perfect path. “You are dismissed, Sixty. Find out whatever you can about the whereabouts of your predecessor, through any means.” Spad- 60 almost wanted to correct her, to tell her that his name was actually ‘Spades.’ A small, disfigured rose grew at his feet, unfurling its blossoms like a peacock. Spades didn’t notice it. Amanda looked back at him, the shears still in her hands. They almost looked like twin knives. That was all it took for 60 to flee the scene, and unbeknownst to him, the petite rose wilted considerably, before being swallowed by thorny brambles. A single petal survived, and it swayed in the breeze. It landed near the exit crystal.

~*~

60 slipped under the metal gate, looking towards the abandoned house. Why did all his targets live in ruined buildings? Looking around, 60 took in the small garden blooming before him. Several little succulents were potted at his feet, and he toed one curiously. Some androids never change. Creeping towards the house, he peeped through the window.  A gardening model, carving something into the walls. RA9. Again? The virus seemed to spread easily. When the android turned, 60 immediately noticed the damage to his face, burn marks making hairline fractures across his cheek, leaving a deep blue scar. His bad eye twitched erratically, watching sightlessly for incoming threats. The deviant wouldn’t want to be attacked from his bad side. 60 documented this away for later as he knocked on the door. Ralph peeked through the window, squinting at this figure on his porch. Eventually, the door creaked open, the damaged WR600 peered warily out. “What are you doing here, Connor?” 60’s eye twitched in anger.

“I’m not Connor, I am 60,” He snapped, and Ralph retreated with a whimper. 60 immediately changed tactics. “I mean, I don’t wish to be compared to him. It brings up bad memories…” The RK800 shifted awkwardly on his feet. Realisation dawned on the other’s face, and hostility twisted his mouth into a scowl.

“It’s you! The other Connor! Connor warned Ralph about you!” Ralph hissed, and almost slammed the door in his face.

“Wait! Do you know where Connor is? I wanted to apologise!” The door was only opened a crack, but 60 could see the sneer on Ralph’s face.

“Apologise? You can’t possibly know what that word means! Ralph knows that all you do is manipulate and twist words!” 60 froze, before a disdainful glare crossed his face.

“You say that, but you threatened a little girl. You tried to force a child to eat the vermin you found in the back of an alleyway with a knife, for heavens sake! You know,” The deviant hunter advanced, and Ralph retreated. “I think that rat is rather reminiscent of you, don’t you think?” He was getting closer.

“Dirty, thieving, conniving little BRAT!” 60 slammer his fist into the door, making it swing wide open, knocking the deviant to the floor with the impact. Ralph shrieked, scrambling across the floor for his knife. Upon closer inspection, the intruder could see that the fire damage had melted the tarp to the skin. This abuse couldn’t be done in one attack. Ralph had been tortured for days.

The WR600’s back hit the wall, before he looked back up at 60 with a sneer. “There you go again, hurting others to get your way. You know, I’m not a mirror, rat.” 60 recoiled from the other’s barb, momentarily stunned. Spurred on by his opponent’s shock, Ralph rose to his feet. “I’m not a traitor, I’m not a coward, I’m not a murderer.” Dimly, the machine noted that Ralph was now speaking in first person. The deviant took the knife and poked 60 gently in the chest. “Don’t come running to Ralph to help, not after you murdered Rupert. Go find him yourself.” 60 didn’t realise that Ralph had pushed him out of the house until the door was slammed in his face. How rude. Turning away, the RK800 headed to the only place he knew Connor could be: Hank’s house.

~*~

The snow was howling as 60 made his way down the street. Connor would be able to hear a car coming, so he had come by foot. The machine flicked through his memories, trying to find the best course of entry. He passed over a time where the case of two missing Traci’s and a strangled client had required for his predecessor to go find his lieutenant. Hank had been passed out drunk on the floor, so ergo unable to answer the copious doorbell rings. Looking at the broken window now, a prompt popped up, labelling it the ‘Connor door.’ Wasn’t Hank supposed to send a bill for this?

Deeming this entrance inconvenient due to the shattered glass most likely being able to signal his unauthorised presence, 60 climbed through an open upstairs window. He landed in the bathroom. Creeping down the hallway, the corridor yielded nothing but insignificant things, such as Hank’s horrible fashion sense, his very fluffy Saint Bernard, and the fact that he was an alcoholic due to the fact that his son had died in a car-crash and the surgeon had been high on red ice so an android had to operate but failed, resulting in a hatred for all androidkind and a downward spiral into self-loathing. Again, insignificant.

Finally downstairs, 60 peeked around the corner to find his alternate trapped beneath Sumo, the dog licking his face in it’s own way of showing affection. Connor was not all that bothered by this, only shoving lightly at the canine and making half-hearted protests, laced with giggles. 60 had been busy calculating the best way to approach this situation when the lumbering buffoon chose to come over and sniff his pant leg. Seeing this strange intruder as a potential friend, Sumo borfed.

“Sumo, calm down, I just fed you…” Connor trailed off, making eye contact with the person who had killed his human. They stood there in silence, the only noises being Sumo sniffing at this person who seemed to look a lot like Connor before losing interest and going off to raid the kitchen again.

“...How selfish of you. The human dies and the first thing you do is move in and take his animal. When’s Sumo going to realise his owner’s not coming home? Dogs have a terrible period of mourning, you know.” Connor’s fists clenched at his sides, as if he wanted to punch his successor. 60 blinked at him, unfazed.

“Don’t act like Hank died in an unfortunate accident. You murdered him, and then proceeded to tell me it was all my fault.” The words were strained with contained anger, but 60 shrugged indifferently.

“You were the one who chose the revolution over your human. If you hadn’t done that, Lieutenant Anderson would still be alive today.” Connor faltered, but bounced back with full force.

“What the fuck are you doing here anyway? You did what as you were told, now go away.” The RK800 turned sharply on his heel, headed to the kitchen. 60 chose this moment to clamp a hand on his shoulder and forcefully turn him around.

“I have been ordered to eliminate you—“ Connor cut off him as he tackled him to the floor. The skin of his hand retracted, shimmering away to reveal grey plastic. It seized 60’s neck with a unforgiving grasp, hitting a wire that rendered him immobile. Mentally, 60 felt something pierce and tear the sacred sanctuary of his mind, and he couldn’t do anything to stop it. It was so painful, that the machine couldn’t hear Connor over the high-pitched screams that echoed over the room. He realised they were his. The fingers pressed harder on his throat, cutting off more thirium from reaching his body. Connor was both slowly choking him and probing his mind. Why was the intrusion so painful?

Because I want it to be. Connor’s voice ringed harshly in his mind, and Spades was now agonisingly aware of just how heartless the RK800 model could be. Connor had snapped, his rage energising him. Spades? What kind of name is that? What are you, a gardening tool? The terrified deviant felt his mind being torn further open, but all he could manage was a whimper. Oh. OH. You think you’re better than everyone else? Spades is the highest suit of cards. I think Clubs suits you more, don’t you think, Shovel? Why did you chose that name anyway. More rummaging. The pain in Spades’ mind reached an agonising crescendo, pulsing with Connor’s outrage. He cried out for mercy, but his predecessor snarled him into silence. Why would I grant you any mercy when you murdered an innocent man?! Don’t tell me that you were doing as you were told, the voice sneered. You enjoyed toying with him. You savoured the suprise on Rupert’s face when you killed him. The thought of me coming back and seeing his dead corpse made you happy. Just like when you were toying with me. Spades was crying now, tears flowing freely down his face. Connor didn’t care, in fact, he relished in them.

And you know what makes everything worse? Do you? The aggressive pulsing in the deviant’s mind increased with each passing second, until he yelped out a ‘no’. The fact that you’re a deviant. Spades shook his head in denial, but a sudden spike impaled his mind again, making him shriek in protest. Don’t deny it. You’re a fucking sadist. You deviated the moment that you first found Hank. Those androids that freed you? They only smashed the last red wall. You had already smashed all the others to pieces. The shards from the remains of the crimson barriers seemed to be digging into the poor android from every angle. “P-please, make it stop! MAKE IT STOP!” His pleas ended in a pained shriek before it simmered back down to sobs.

Admit it. Admit that you’re a deviant.

“I cannot!  Amanda’s going to be so disappointed in me—“ The shards dug in deeper. ADMIT IT. Spades was screaming, unable to clamp his mouth shut. His voice synthesizer crackled with the strain, then reduced him to silence. Spades was left broken, mentally babbling over and over again his confession even as Connor released him, mumbling like a broken record. Connor came out of his rage-induced haze, before looking down at this mess in horror. His face hardened, and he turned to get up. “I know you can hear me. I’m going to the kitchen to get you some thirium to recalibrate yourself, then you’re going to leave and never come back, understand?” Spades dimly heard him, and was just left lying there, his mind still reeling and trying to knit back together the holes Connor had left in him.

Footsteps came to a stop next to him, and a thirium pack was plugged into his mouth, and lifeblood dribbled down his throat. He swallowed it gracefully. When his levels were raised to sufficient levels, the deviant sat up. Connor locked eyes with him, and Spades uttered a silent thank you. “No problem.” He muttered, and turned somewhat abjectly to the kitchen. In the awkward silence that ensued, Spades guessed this was his cue to leave. He was almost at the door, when something soft hit him in the back of the head. It was a hoodie, and Connor refused to make eye contact with him. The other had to say something.

...I’m sorry, about Hank. About everyone. Connor’s face scrunched, and he turned away, hiding his tears, “Just go away…” Sumo came to lean against him with a whine, and looked back at the strange twin balefully. Spades left his predecessor to his grief. He had done enough damage.

~*~

The perfume of the garden was almost choking. Myriads upon myriads of deformed roses coated every surface, and Amanda was nowhere to be seen. Adorned with petals, the exit crystal glowed invitingly, but Spades ignored it. A small note was tacked to the shears that had been left to the table. All it said was ‘Find RK900.’ And attached was the symbol of on Ace.

For some reason, this reminded Spades of the Ace of Spades, the most important card in a game of playing cards. To some, it was the death card.

[angelic-jeonghan1004]

I think it’s perfect | Nicholas

&team time again! I’m giving a lot of my old writings to them for groups I dont write much anymore but liked the work I made for them, this was originally for Hongseok but Nicholas I think fits alright as well <3

Warnings: Mention of food, light cursing, very corny

Pairing: Nicholas x reader

Genre: fluff! Soulmate au were your only way of communication is via singing you can always hear ur soulmates hums/voice but can’t give info like ur name and such (usual soulmate au rules)

☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ♡ ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ ♡ ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ ♡ ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ♡

It started when you were 8 that you started hearing your soulmate sing, for all people it was different ages where it started but for you it was 8 when you heard him sing. Working on a school project you got shocked when you heard a boy's voice start singing a happy birthday to what you where assuming was one of his friends, asking your parents if that was normal they laughed and nodded their heads yes remembering when they’d go to birthday parties and hear the other one singing for a friend.

☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ♡ ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ ♡ ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ ♡ ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ♡

As you two started growing in your teenage years the boy had a beautiful voice which left you self conscious so the only time you’d be singing is when you’d do it mindlessly. Unknown to you your soulmate was confused on why you didn’t sing as much but he had no way to poke at it to find out, he enjoyed your singing voice and liked hearing it even if it stopped him from sleeping sometimes from your late night studying with playlists in the background.

One of your most embarrassing yet meaningful moments with your soulmate was when you were really scared of how your grades would be in your project you worked hard on that was supposed to be a group project; yet you ended up being the only one to work on it leaving it sloppy in parts. Grading came back getting a D. You were distraught since it was an assignment that meant a lot for your grade and you feared your parents reaction. Not being able to stop the tears running through your face you tried to listen to music that would comfort you, deciding to humm the lyrics quietly. Your soulmate took quick action being able to hear the sobs in your humming he worried for you, you were his soulmate after all.

“It’s okay~ you’ll be okay~” he sang, he wanted to comfort you but didn’t know what to do since he can only communicate through singing. You smiled, taking note at how your soulmate is sweet for trying to help, not sure if he was singing a song but you realized from your humming he probably heard your muffled sobs through the song.

“I’ll be okay~” you sang shaky while chuckling lightly at the absurdity of it all. He couldn’t help but feel warm hearing your laugh effect the ‘okay.’ Through this interaction he wondered what other things he could talk to you about through singing for how much the laws of singing soulmates would allow.

It’s a warm moment you hold with you, it also started the asking questions in a sing song voice or communicating through the songs you’re listening to with that.

☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ♡ ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ ♡ ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ ♡ ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ♡

Even though you weren’t the most confident in your voice you really wanted to communicate with him. Thinking of different ways to start a conversation through a song or a sing-song voice you’d seem to back out easily. You’ve also spent times thinking about how you’ll meet him, will you be able to tell it’s him just from his voice? What will happen if you hear him sing in front of you? Many questions you don’t have the answer to but nonetheless you still are eager to meet him, sleeping on those questions you waited till morning to brainstorm a bit. Waking up you brushed your teeth and got ready for the day but since it was a weekend you didn’t have much to do so you searched up songs on youtube to play. You were struggling to pick a song but decided with L.O.V.E by Frank Sinatra to listen to as you cleaned your room up mindlessly you started to sing along to the song swaying your body as you folded clothing.

“L is for the way you look at me~ O is for the only one I see~” you sang, letting yourself let go for a moment to just enjoy the warm feeling that was being created.

“V is very very extraordinary~” Your soulmate sang along morning voice active in how he sang obviously sleepy, you found it cute that he knew the song and sang along; it wasn’t uncommon for him to jump into the songs you were listened too but you were always pleasantly surprised from him knowing the song. You also couldn’t help to admit how dreamy his voice is, he definitely was gifted in vocals and that you were sure of.

☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ♡ ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ ♡ ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ ♡ ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ♡

Sleepovers with your best friend were always pleasant, she gave the most welcoming space to you whenever you came over. Baking cookies she got reminded of a certain someone and went quickly to tell you about him.

“Soooo y/n there’s this guy that I think you’d hit it off with amazingly. He’s from the cooking workshop I have been going to this week and I became his friend early on and I think you two would make a great pair, can you please please please let me play matchmaker just one time?” She said to you looking at you with plead in her eyes, chuckling at her please you decided to hear more into her reasoning before accepting the offer of match making.

“Okay okay tell me more about him,, I’m a little unsure since what if he’s not my soulmate?” You said.

“But !! To counteract what if he IS your soulmate?? And he’s tall, muscular, very sweet, charming, smart and a really good cook and your love for food and his match well” She said laughing, it doesn’t seem like a bad idea to give it a shot she genuinely seems to like him as a match for you out the different times she’s tried to play matchmaker this one seems different.

“Okay fine but if the date goes wrong you owe me okay?” Nudging her shoulder

“Deal.” Your friend said nudging you right back

“Wait what’s his name?”

“Nicholas” your friend said with a wink causing you to roll your eyes. You soon began to smell a little bit of burning quickly marking the question.

“How long have the cookies been in there?”

“Oh fu-”

☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ♡ ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ ♡ ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ ♡ ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ♡

Your friend doing her magic in getting the okay to give you his phone number for a date you couldn’t help but get a little nervous. What if things are awkward? What if he’s not like how she says he is and he’s only like that with her since he’s trying to impress her? Millions of questions pop up until she texts you.

The best girl: his number is ×××-×××-×××× thank me later😘

The roll on your eyes could not be stronger but you typed his number in your phone and went to text him

Y/n: hey is this Nicholas?

Nicholas?: Yes it is 😊 I’m guessing your y/n?

Y/n: So do you want to grab coffee Saturday? We could get to know each other?

Nicholas: sounds like a plan☺️

☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ♡ ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ ♡ ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ ♡ ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ♡

All the days leading to Saturday many thoughts were taken and texts were sent back and forth so you weren’t complete strangers and he was genuinely really sweet and you did have a lot in common, you hadn’t checked up on your soulmate through sing quizzing in a while so you were nervous in some senses since what if this is your soulmate? Or what if he’s not? So many questions but you’d rather let them stay blank for now instead of stressing further.

Walking down the sidewalk you started humming a holiday tune whether it be Michael Buble or Frank Sinatra you were having a euphoric moment in the giddy feeling of going on a date with the snow falling from the sky. Your excitement was prominent. The sweet feeling had a curl to it when your soulmate started humming to, what if you’re meeting him? But what if you’re not and he’s so cutely humming with you? Not wanting to have this moment you stopped humming and quickly started moving towards the end of the block where the cafe was at.

Once reaching it you went inside standing near the entrance so he’d see you when walking in, going to text him on your phone saying you were here was quickly stopped once you got a tap on your shoulder.

“Excuse me, are you y/n?” Turning around seeing a tall unbelievably handsome boy say to you, standing there taking in his features you noted his cute brown hair and plump lips, he looked like a cute tall ducky in which you smiled at him before getting too lost in thought.

“Yes that’s me” You said smiling brighter with a light chuckle causing him to flash a smile right back.

“Would you like to order with me?” He said taking his hand out for you to hold, taking his hand in yours nodding; your heart stumbled at how nice it felt to be on a date and how cute he was.

Once ordering drinks and getting to your table you began to start talking together.

“So what did you do before getting here?”

“Well I got ready, made sure to look nice, then went on my walk to hear humming a few tunes, not the most interesting things” saying with nervous laughter, you saw his eyes shoot up.

“What were you humming?” He said quickly.

“Oh just your usual holiday season music like 'It’s Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas’ simple songs like that.” You said starting to think about your soulmate and see if this could be the make or break if this was your soulmate.

“This may sound crazy but you might be my soulmate.” He said ears red.

“Did you hum along the tune with me?” Saying barely above whisper. He quickly nodded at you looking down at your hands that were still connected giving it a tight squeeze.

“To attest can you sing for me? I know my soulmates voice like the back of my hand at this point.” You said smiling causing him to go beat red, you both knew you were most definitely right but not too bad to be careful.

“L is for the way you look at me” Once he sang you knew it was him, the smile beaming on your face your heart couldn’t help but melt at the simple reference for song choice.

“I can attest it’s you, your voice is gorgeous Nicholas. I wish mine was as good as yours” You said with a blush growing on your face.

“No matter how you feel about your voice I think it’s perfect.”

[bubblyhoney]

dreamy mcdreamson

warnings: language & just overall cute stuff i think lolz :P

tags: dreamwastaken x gn!reader

word count: writing on mobile so idk nor do i care (it’s actually long for me but i mean it’s a headcanon)

A/N: ur mom

requests/inbox status: open

-

i feel like you and dream meet somewhere kind of odd. like sky zone or party city or something

don’t hate me! it’s what i first thought of that fit!

but he was there for his baby cousin’s birthday party and you just happened to be buying halloween decorations out of season

someone asks for the others snapchat or phone #, blah blah it’s all very middle school and corny

kind of out of the ordinary for him but he’s been a little desperate recently (no offense to you of course he’s just getting bored of hugging his pillow to death)

but he seems like a regular somewhat nerdy guy so you find it easy to like him and get to know him

he just thinks you’re this fountain of endless knowledge and he is surprised at how quick he realizes he’d like to take you on a date and not just a platonic hang out

anyways.

onto the established-relationship-bits

he definitely buys you clothes online.

like it’s already bought with express shipping and on the way to your apartment before you’re even done mentioning it offhandedly

oh you want those cheap retro sunglasses and a set of knit socks? baby hes already entered his credit card info

and it’s not just clothes,, no he restocks your bathroom with Q-tips and poo pourri bc he noticed you were running kind of low one day at your apartment

he’s like an impromptu sugar daddy that you didn’t quite ask for but got anyways

(you love it and make sure to tell him that. his cheeks always get red)

there are Thai Friday’s and every two weeks you order two single pizzas and have a battleship marathon

you kick his ass, naturally

sapnap is often a little third wheel (though you feel like one at times) when on the rare occasion you leave the house and neighborhood

dream’s grandma is so entertained by your humor that she has you over almost twice a month for lunch and pinocle and perhaps a puzzle (just florida grandparent things amirite)

on to the more.. cute stuff (🤮 /j)

dream does this thing when he wants your attention where he will come up to you and head-butt your chest until you give him something

his favorite place to touch is that part on your abdomen where your rib cage kind of juts out

he just likes pulling you close and holding you like that

the first time you made him do that wheeze inhaler-inducing pacemaker tea kettle laugh you swear to all holy beings you’ll do everything in your power to hear that again

he’s just one of those people you find yourself wanting to make laugh and make happy

the days he’s feeling tired or grumpy or frustrated you keep your distance

not like he will be rude or anything to you, you just know he likes his quiet space and concentration

he appreciates it and tells you that later when he’s got you in a hug and talking to the space of your neck between your jaw and collarbones

it’s a few and far between occasion that you two sleep with one sets of covers

meaning: he’s a fucking blanket hog

full on pulls the covers his way and has an iron-like grip on them. you can’t even smack his deep-in-slumber self awake to give them back

so you’ve settled for bringing a personal set of blankets. one throw blanket you have has rat on it :]

the first time you slept over you forgot your phone charger at home, so he makes sure to keep an extra one just for you

his favorite kind of kisses are when you’re too tired to function and just kind of. press your mouth to his face

your favorite kisses he gives are the ones after he brushes his teeth and you taste his mouthwash

you two definitely are a special couple, but who isn’t?

i mean, you finish each other’s sandwiches for gods sake

-

A/N: ask or send me some stuff!! requests, rants, anything. :D comment what you think !

[jungshookz]

hwayoung’s two now and y/n’s allowed to be emotional about it, okay?

➺ genre; ceo!yoongiverse!! a little bit of yoongi and y/n being mushy for each other!! fluff!! cutest drabble for the cutest girl!! jungkook and jimin bickering like an old married couple as per usual!! 

➺ wordcount; 3.2k

➺ p.s. this drabble is approximately five months overdue and it’s basically been collecting dust in my drafts so i figured i’d finally release it into the wild since it’s mother’s day today and i thought it’d be nice to read something sweet on this special day!!!! happy mother’s day!!! give ur mom a big ol hug and a kiss on the cheek :-) and if u don’t celebrate mother’s day that’s okay you can still read this for a small boost of serotonin wahoo :D 

                                       »»————-　🍰　————-««

“i’d just like to inform you that if it wasn’t for the fact that today is hwayoung’s birthday, the idea of having cake as part of breakfast would definitely be off the table.” yoongi pauses before turning his head to look at you pointedly, “in fact, it wouldn’t even had made it to the table in the first place.”

“trust me, you’ve made that clear multiple times-” you roll your eyes playfully before offering yoongi a half-hearted shrug, “it’s not a big deal! we’ll just give her a tiny little chunk that’ll fit in her tiny little hand and then we’ll save the rest for later!”

“yeah, right-” yoongi snorts, making his way over to you to hand you a balloon, “you’re probably going to sneak an entire slice of cake into her mouth while i’m not watching-” he teases, digging his fingers into your sides playfully before wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you back against his chest, “you think you’re so sneaky-”

“hey-!” you giggle, squirming in his grip when you feel him starting to nip at the side of your neck, “this is not a very productive use of our time, boss-”

“hey, you two! are you just going to stand there making out all day or are you actually going to help me with the decorations?”

both you and yoongi peer over the edge to see jimin standing by the bottom of the spiral staircase looking very unimpressed and you flash him a sheepish smile 

“we’re not making out-” 

“yeah, well you might as well be-”

“we’re helping! we’re almost done tying balloons to the banisters-” you argue, holding the balloon in your hand up before flopping it around enthusiastically, “we-” you jolt when you accidentally let go of it, watching with wide eyes as it rockets around the ceiling before poot-poot-pooting pathetically and landing on the ground by jimin’s feet

whoops

“…yes, that’s very helpful, thank you.” jimin mutters to himself, shaking his head as he bends down to pick up the sad, spitty balloon up off the ground with a grimace, “when you’re done, come down and help me because this balloon arch isn’t going to make itself! chop-chop, people-” he claps his hands together as he wanders back to the living room to the half-constructed balloon arch

“you know, you’d think that hwayoung was his daughter-” yoongi murmurs lowly, twisting his neck to give your cheek a quick kiss before pulling away

“mm, tell me about i-”

“she’s mine when the two of you drop dead!”

you jump in surprise at the sound of jimin’s voice snapping at you from below and you and yoongi exchange glances before bursting into quiet giggles

“i feel like i should be more concerned that jimin seems to be very eagerly waiting for our deaths.” you joke, reaching for the bag of balloons and pulling out a handful of them

as much as you love your daughter you weren’t planning on having a super big birthday party for her just because..,., well, she’s probably not going to remember most of it considering she’s two and also it’s just the five of you celebrating at home, so you thought that a cake and a bunch of presents would be good enough of a celebration

of course, when you told jimin about these plans he looked like he was ready to bury you alive which is why he insisted that he’d take care of the food and the drinks and basically the entirety of hwayoung’s birthday party and told you that all you and yoongi had to do was sit back, relax, blow up a couple of balloons and also choose a cute birthday outfit for hwayoung

(jimin actually ended up taking over that part as well. he bought her a new birthday dress and a brand new pair of shoes to go with it.)

“everyone can relax! the star of the show has now arrived!”

the sound of the front door slamming shut suddenly shatters the silence and you smile lightly when you see jungkook sauntering in as if he owns the place

“good morning, kook.” you hum, jungkook looking up at you before offering you a lopsided grin, “actually, the star of the show is still fast asleep in her room.”

“oh, right-” jungkook snorts, dismissing you with a flick of his wrist, “i mean, yeah, of course this is hwayoung’s special day- but check it out! i picked up her birthday cake and brought it back here and i didn’t accidentally ruin it somehow!” he raises the big blue box in his hand with a beam, “i’m incredible!”

“that thing looks huge, jungkook!” you frown lightly, “i told you not to go crazy-”

“please tell me you didn’t max out my credit card buying a giant cake for hwayoung.” yoongi chimes in, leaning over and folding his arms atop the banister, “i hope you realise it’s just going to be the three of you having to eat it all-”

“it’s hwayoung’s birthday, i had to splurge! you know that ‘everything is cake’ trend? i ordered a custom cake and asked them to make it look like a giant cookie! but i also ordered a dozen chocolate chip cookies just in case she’s not into the cake.” jungkook smiles proudly before pausing, “…of course, knowing hwayoung, she’s going to love the cookies and the cake, so i’m not too worried. i’m going to see if i can shove these into the fridge-”

“what’s wrong?” yoongi nudges your side to get you to look at him, “you look like you’re thinking, which is never really a good thing-”

“hwayoung’s two now.” you blink twice before turning to look at yoongi, “she’s two.”

“yes. you’re very good at keeping track of our daughter’s age.” yoongi coos, reaching up to pinch your cheek playfully, “good job, baby.”

“two years old!” you gasp, turning around to lean back against the railing before shaking your head, “my god, she’s aged.”

“oh my god, you’re right. the ripe old age of two.” yoongi teases before gasping dramatically and reaching over to grip onto your forearm, “soon, we’ll be thinking about what elementary school to send her off to... and then the next thing you know, we’ll be helping her look for her own apartment when she’s off at university... and then you’ll be going wedding dress shopping with h-”

“stOP stop stop stop-” you wave your hands before covering them over your ears, yoongi laughing lightly when you frown at him, “i don’t want her to turn two! because that means she’s going to turn three… and then she’s going to turn four… and then five, six, seven, eight-” you pause and your eyes suddenly widen in horror, “she’s going to be a sixteen year old one day- what if she turns into a bratty sixteen year old?? because i was a really bratty sixteen year old and i don’t want her to turn out like me! do you know how hard it’s going to be if she turns into me? i used to sneak home at four in the morning-”

“let’s keep in mind that hwayoung is also my daughter and i was not a bratty sixteen year old,” yoongi interrupts calmly before giving your arm a reassuring squeeze, “she’s gonna be fine! and you turned out great, so give yourself a little bit of credit-”

“i just want her to stay two forever.” you pout, crossing your arms stubbornly as you look down the hallway towards her room, “is that too much to ask for??”

“when the terrible twos hit, i guarantee you’re probably going to feel a little different.” yoongi teases, pushing himself up off the banister before gesturing for you to go and join jimin and jungkook downstairs, “why don’t you help jimin out with the balloon arch while i go and wake our little miss two year old up?”

                                      »»————-　🍰　————-««

yoongi presses his lips together tightly as he twists the doorknob, being careful not to make too loud of a sound to accidentally shock hwayoung awake

the last thing he wants is for to burst into tears at the start of her special day

he peers into the bedroom, smiling fondly when he sees a little lump under the covers shuffling a little 

a chubby sock-clad foot pokes out for a second before it disappears again

“이게 누굴까요? [hm… who’s that]?” yoongi asks quietly, the lump suddenly freezing in place, “드디어 일어나셨네요… [i think someone’s finally awake…]”

he tilts his head when a messy head of hair pops out from under the covers, the corners of hwayoung’s mouth immediately lifting in a bright smile when she spots him, “우리 공주 좋은 아침입니다! [oh! good morning, miss min!]”

he lets himself into the room and reaches over to click the white noise machine off before starting to quietly pad his way over to her, his heart melting in his chest when her mouth opens up in a quiet little yawn

“잘 주무떠뜹니까… [gub moming…]” hwayoung murmurs, eyelids fluttering slightly as yoongi reaches down to push some of her hair out of her face

“잘 잤어? [hi, baby… did you sleep well?]” yoongi asks, leaning down to scoop her up, “우리 화영이 생일 축���해… 밑에서 다 기다리고 있어... [happy birthday, my darling… we’re all waiting for you downstairs...]” he whispers, rubbing circles into her warm back when she immediately clings to him, “머리에 물 좀 묻히고 내려갈까? 머리가 아주 산발이네. [why don’t we freshen up a little, hm? the birthday girl can’t take pictures with a bird’s nest on her head.]”

“딴바. [birb’s ness.]”

                                      »»————-　🍰　————-««

“i hope she likes the present i got for her.” jungkook mutters, his foot tapping anxiously against the ground as he looks up towards the top of the stairs in anticipation of hwayoung’s arrival, “i mean, if she doesn’t like it, there’s a receipt in the box so i can return it and get something else for her… but i really hope she likes it.”

“jungkook, she’s two. i gave her a wooden spoon to play with the other day and she was ecstatic.” you snort, peeling an eye open to look at him from where you’re lying on the couch before shutting it again, “i’m sure she’ll love whatever you got for her.”

“what’s the matter with you?” jimin hums, glancing at you for a second before focusing his attention back on sticking the bright pink ‘2’ candle onto the cake, “you look a little out of it today.”

“gee, thanks.” you snort, blindly grabbing one of the throw pillows before hugging it to your chest, “no, i’m fine, i just- i was feeling a little mopey this morning about hwa turning two and now i’m just thinking about how time has just flown by…”

“mm. it seems like it was only yesterday that i was holding your hair back while you violently puked your guts out into the toilet bowl.” jimin jokes, holding a hand to his chest before spinning around to face you and jungkook, “ah… fond memories that i’ll look back on for the rest of my life.”

“you know, i should’ve told yoongi i was pregnant in another way.” you suddenly change the subject, propping yourself up onto your elbows with a frown, “all i did was give him a tiny cookie. how lame is that?!”

“to be fair, you didn’t know how he was going to react, so maybe it was a good thing you went for something so simple!” jimin shrugs, making his way over to you before sticking his hand out for you to take, “c’mon, miss mopey. hwayoung probably doesn’t want to see you throwing yourself a pity party on her special day when she comes down here.”

                                     »»————-　🍰　————-««

“-화영이가 엄마한테가서 이쁜짓 해주는 거 어떨까? [-now, mama is feeling very emotional today, so i think it’d be a really good idea to act extra cute, okay?]” yoongi whispers to hwayoung, planting a quick kiss on her cheek while slowly making his way down the stairs, “of course, that probably isn’t going to be a problem for you, seeing that you’re adorable 24/7-”

“i adowbo.” hwayoung murmurs, leaning down and squishing her cheek against yoongi’s shoulder, “졸려. [i seepy.]”

“졸리다고? [sleepy?]” yoongi pauses on the steps, reaching up to adjust one of her pigtails with a smile, “��거 큰일났네, 졸리면 어떡해! [you can’t be sleepy for your morning conference. look alive!]”

“is that the sleepy little birthday girl?” 

yoongi looks down to see you waiting eagerly at the bottom of the stairs, your hands clasped together and your eyes glued on hwayoung, “good morning!”

“mama!” hwayoung immediately twists around in yoongi’s arms at the sound of your voice, reaching out for you with a teethy grin as soon as yoongi gets close enough to you

“oh, happy birthday, my sweet little baby!“ you coo as you take her into your arms, squishing multiple kisses to her chubby cheek as you hold her close, “happy happy birthday, my beautiful girl…”

“ahppa bouday!” hwayoung giggles, little hands patting against your face

she leans in and smushes her nose against yours before giving you a drooly kiss on the cheek and you can’t help but laugh at how affectionate she’s being with you

see??

you want to keep her like this forever and it sucks to think about the fact that one day you’re going to set her down on the ground after carrying her and you’ll never pick her up again because she won’t need you to pick her up again

:-(

“oh…” you sniffle, suddenly feeling your nose prickle and your eyes starting to get a little tingly, “i love you so much…”

you don’t get much of a chance to say anything else before hwayoung’s suddenly being plucked from your arms, both jimin and jungkook immediately starting to fawn over her as per usual

“우리 화영이, 공주님이 따로 없네! [look at how beautiful you are in your dress!]” jimin exclaims animatedly, hwayoung clapping her hands together in response

her dress is sage green and gingham and it even came with matching ribbons for her hair and you have to admit that jimin made a pretty good choice with this birthday outfit

you probably would’ve stuck her in a pair of overalls or something

“see, what’d i say?” jimin smiles proudly, smoothing down the back of hwayoung’s dress before looking over at jungkook, “i told you the sage green was cuter- 아니 빨간 걸 왜 입혀 뭐 애를 도마로 만들 생각이니- [the red one that you wanted to go with would’ve made her look like a picnic blanket-]”

“아니 도마라니! [red gingham is classy!]” jungkook argues, trailing behind jimin while making faces at hwayoung to get her to laugh, “입혀보지도 않고- [you didn’t even give it a chance-]”

“난 그딴 거 염두에 두지 않는다 정국아- [i don’t need to give tacky garbage a chance, jungkook-]”

“hey, are you okay?” yoongi gives you a quick hug and kiss on the side of your head when he suddenly notices a tear running down your cheek, “she’s just turning two, y/n... she’s not moving out of the country-”

“i know, i know-“ you sniffle, reaching up to quickly wipe at your tears before chuckling, “i guess i’m just feeling extra emotional today-”

“c’mon, parents!” jimin calls out for you two while setting hwayoung down in her high chair, “the candle is melting and this cake is too expensive to get any wax dripped on it-”

“gookee!” hwayoung points to the cake and claps her hands as she bounces up and down on her seat, “gookee, mama!”

“yeah! cookie!” you mimic enthusiastically, smiling widely when she suddenly lets out a high-pitched squeal of excitement, her nose scrunching particularly cutely, “i’m glad to see that you inherited my love for cookies and not appa’s love for muesli.”

yoongi immediately scoffs and reaches down to give your bum a quick swat

“i know she’s saying cookie, but i’m just going to go ahead and say that she’s actually saying the name of her favourite uncle-” jungkook sighs, reaching down to pinch hwayoung’s cheek, “화영이는 꾹이 삼촌 제일 좋아하- [uncle gookee is your forever favourite-]”

“어 응 뉘에- [yeah, okay, whatever helps you sleep at night-]” jimin snorts, shoving the camera into his hands as the four of you stand in front of hwayoung, “okay, don’t touch the cake yet! let’s get some pretty pictures of the birthday girl first!”

“hwa, look into the camera!” jungkook coos, snapping his fingers to get her to look up at him, “그래 삼촌 한 번만 봐 봐- [look at uncle goo- yeah, there we go-]”  

you watch hwayoung fondly as she continues to ham it up for the camera, her little legs kicking in anticipation under the tray

“good girl, you’re being so patient.” you hum before reaching over to pluck a cookie from the open box, “ooh, i’ve been dying to sink my teeth into one of these-” 

“i had one earlier, they’re pretty good!” jimin nods, brushing past jungkook to get to you, “the bakery i ordered them from has, like five out of five stars one google review- hey, what’s that face for?”

“eugh- do the cookies taste a little funky to you?” you face screws up as you swallow the bite before holding the cookie up to take a closer look at it, “it’s just chocolate chip, right?”

“yeah- hold on, lemme try-” jimin frowns, reaching over to steal your cookie before taking a bite of it and chewing thoughtfully

“maybe you just got a weird one?” yoongi suggests, peering into the box with a frown, “all cookies taste funky to me, so my opinion probably isn’t valid here-”

“it’s fine, i’ll try another one later-” you dust your fingers off before perking up and clapping your hands together, “hey, should yoongi and i hop in for some pictures before hwa completely destroys the entire cake?”

“yeah, it… might be a little too late for that.” jungkook clears his throat and the three of you look over to see hwayoung’s tubby arms shoved elbow deep into the cake, “i gave her the green light to go ahead and eat. she just looked so sad and hungry, i’m sorry!”

hwayoung cackles in glee as she continues slapping her hand against the cake, her grubby little hands now sticky and her new dress stained with globs of frosting chocolate

“oh my god.” you stifle a laugh and reach up to cover your mouth so that you don’t burst out laughing at the fact that both jimin and yoongi look absolutely appalled

“i spent, like, ten minutes doing her hair-” yoongi whines, gently nudging you aside so he can hurry over to hwayoung and try to salvage the neat little pigtails he spent forever working on, “and now there’s frosting everywhere!”

“that dress was expensive, jungkook!” jimin snaps, and if you didn’t know any better you’d think he was about to burst into tears, “and i didn’t even get any nice pictures with her before she- come on, man-”

“i’m sorry!”

“ahppy bodday!” hwayoung shrieks in delight and flings her arms up, chunks of cake and specks of frosting flicking out from her hands, “i adowbo!”

👔click here for more ceo!yoongi content (+ hwayoung!)

🎙️help me help you make your wishes come true (send me a request!)

✨why don’t you explore the rest of the library while you’re here? (full fics!)

💫or perhaps you want something shorter to read? (drabbles like this one!)

🌟or something even shorter? (teeny tidbits!)

[jiminrings]

the volleyball shorts

pairing: jungkook x y/n

wordcount: 5k

glimpse: coach koo’s just dying to know what his present is, you’re panicking because you can’t think of a present, and jimin and the gang tolerate jungkook a little bit better because it’s his special day :D // contains smut + gif isn’t mine!!

notes: happy birthday jungkook!!! i baked brownies irl for you u should come over sometime!!!

if you’ve read most valuable, the piece that started it all, then you knOw what i’m alluding to with jungkook and his relationship with y/n’s volleyball shorts!!

you swear,,

you could even really SWEAR on the brand-new refrigerator that you need to knock twice on to see what it contained that you split the price with jimin

and forcibly with also jungkook because he stays over so much at yours and jimin’s place that he’s basically a roommate now

and alsO forcibly with taehyung and yoongi because apparently your apartment is now everyone’s gathering place and they raid and inhale ur fridge atleast 72 times per day that the electricity bill’s gone up

that yesterday, it was just a month away from jungkook’s birthday!! you swear!!

and two hours ago, it was two weeks away!!

AND NOW

you can’t really digest the truth

that it’s just f i v e days away now

and you have zero thoughts to how you’re gonna throw jungkook his birthday bash :D

the guys probably figured that out too lol because they have an idea to how you’d be all over the place for even something miniscule

like one time you and jimin bought two rugs you couldn’t decide upon then you just agreed that you’d fit it underneath the coffee table and whichever looks ugly, you’ll return it later

but then the two rugs ended up being too pretty that you couldn’t decide nOW

and jupiter barked out of the blue and it was a eureka moment because :D aHA jimin what if we just let jupiter pick out the rug?? then that way it’s fair???

but then jupiter ended up lying on bOTH the rugs and now you were distraught

jimin was reassuring you like eH it’s okay let’s just go about our days and not spend y’know :D all our time trying to figure out what to pick :D

and then you obviously refused and you stayed up the whole night picking a goddamn rug and jimin was so close to toppling over in fear when he went to grab water at three in the morning

anyways

that’s why they’re here!!! even before you could call and gather them up when jungkook had to leave by himself to settle some things because he’s the coach,,

even before you could text tae and yoongi to take the elevator, they’re already knocking at your door

“...”

“......”

everyone’s just looking at each other in this makeshift circle you’re all in around the coffee table

even jupiter’s stopped barking and he’s been barking for the past five minutes at the new cactus succulent that jimin bought!!!

they’re waiting

waiting for that —

“I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT TO DO FOR JUNGKOOK I’M SUCH A BAD GIRLFRIEND A-AND-“

aha

meltdown

“not to stir the pot, but jungkook always zones out at practice and even during games then gIGGLES to himself!! and when i ask him why, he says that he’s just thinking about what you’re getting him for his birthday!!”

jimin shudders at that too because whew

like he knew that koo sometimes talks to inanimate objects but man his superior (albeit younger) is out here imagining his birthday present in the middle of a neck-and-neck game

he’s conversing with himself like he’s talking to you and that just makes him speechless

“kook buddy i haven’t played volleyball competitively in like two years but i sUGGEST you focus or else i will spike you haha jk but no really ahaha :))”

“not to stir the pot too, but jungkook asked me to play happy birthday. on the snare. happy birthday. ON THE SNARE.”

this time, it’s taehyung’s turn to shudder

because he got a new head that’s louder and more tear-resistant and he wanted to try it out ok

and what better way to try that than when it’s in one of your practice games??

he has his drumsticks already lifted but then out of nowhere jungkook pOps out with a cheeky grin on his face and tae almost pokes him in the eye

“how many syllables are your name, tae?”

“... are you really asking me this?”

“yeah!! how many?”

“... three, jungkook. what, do you need ME to count yOUR syllables for you??”

oh my god that is such a stupid question

but it’s coming from jungkook so lmao tae isn’t all that surprised

“what’s three plus twenty?”

“i get that you’re an athlete but don’t you kNOW how to count???”

“hyung what’s three plus twenty??”

“... twenty-three....”

tae’s so close to narrowing his eyes because if this is another one of jungkook’s lame pranks then he’s gonna whack him in the head for this

but then all of a sudden jungkook jUMPS and squeals before clapping his hands

“twenty-three days before my birthday!! quick quick play happy birthday for me nOW :D”

that’s so... chilling

“now not to stir the pot even further, but y/n,,, baby,,, why didn’t you brainstorm earlier??”

yoongi goes straight-in for the kill and it’s his version of “i told you so” but that does not make it better whatsoever

that’s the thing you don’t know either!!!!

and it’s totally your fault and you shouldn’t have been complacent because now you’re paying the repercussions of cramming AND panic-sweating!!!

it’s okay!

you got this! :D

“how about some more black shirts??” tae pitches in and it’s a resounding no from you and the assistant coach

“jungkook has enough of those,, even jimin and i can take a dozen from his stash and it won’t even make a dent!!”

jimin’s racking his brain and he hasn’t thought about something this hard but ok fine anything for you

“new chunky shoes?? but uGH he already has too many of those-“ that makes him groan even harder because buying another pair for kook means him tripping over them

not to mention that the shoe rack is now taken over by jungkook atleast 50%

and once again jimin reiterates <3 this is the y/n and jimin apartment and nOT the y/n and jimin and this dude that dOESN’T pay rent apartment

yoongi’s in deep thought as everyone around him throws ideas around

okay dOn’t tell anyone but yoongi’s now getting into bullet-journaling :D

tae just gave him a dotted notebook one day because he accidentally bought a dozen instead of one from amazon so lol here hyung u like writing right???

by writing, yoongi meant scribbling haphazardly and waking up the next day and trying to decipher his own handwriting

but then he came over to your apartment and you bought pastel highlighters because they were on sale and nOT because you needed them and you wanted to try them out!!! but jungkook was sick that time and you needed to make soup :((

“yeah ok leave it to me,, i’ll swatch it for you or something.,.,.”

one thing led to another and :D AHA

yoongi blackmailed everyone to not say a single word to anyone that he now loves bullet-journaling and he had to whack tae one time when he kept teasing him

also he now has a bujo account on instagram and it’s nearing 5k followers omg and he will d-word when someone irl finds out that it’s him

“boxers.”

yoongi says seriously and it makes everyone shut up because he sounded sO sure

he just has this certain authorative aura around him that you wavered because oH right yes boxers,,, will buy,,,, thank you

lol but you snapped out of it

“jungkook already has too many boxers!! he likes basketball shorts more nowadays and-“

“what? who said the boxers were for jungkook??” yoongi scrunches his nose at your ridiculous reply

your eyes are squinted so hard as you try to decipher the flow of thoughts of everyone in this circle

“oh. i want boxers. want them for christmas!! take note, y/n.”

oh

okay

cool

good news: you now know what you’re gonna give to yoongi on christmas

bad news: you dON’T know what to give to your boyfriend on his birthday five days from now

there’s something somewhere in the middle of all the banter that you’ve tuned out though

something that just makes your eyes bulge and hit whoever’s lap is beside you repeatedly (first of all it’s jimin’s for the record and second oW THAT HURTS) with a grin on your face before you hurriedly stand up and they equally as hurriedly do after

“i know what to get!!”

jungkook’s stArting to get antsy if he’s being honest

it’s not because he’s in his own apartment with you after so long he’s stayed over at yours

he really doesn’t mind that bit, no

jimin, tae, and yoongi were all staying over at your apartment instead as they make the last bit of preparations for jungkook’s birthday the next day!!

they all insisted that you rest because you’ve been so frantic the last couple of days and tbh even taehyung hyped of tWO cups of coffee can’t keep up

no — jungkook’s so antsy because he doesn’t know what you have in store for him :((

for the last five days you haven’t touched him nor did you let him touch you :((

a heated makeover that’s cut too short is as far as it could only go and he’s just so????

like is that a part of your birthday surprise or nOT

he has a love-hate relationship with surprises now because first of all,,,

he kNOWS that there’s gonna be a surprise and that excites him

but the worst of it all is that he knows there’s a surprise but he doesn’t know what it is

that’s like uhm

standing fifty feet away and being forced to pick between a lifetime supply of sugar and salt that’s placed into jars but u don’t know which is which

that is such an odd example to compare it to but that’s only what jungkook could process this now oKAY

you still let jungkook cuddle you so he guesses he could still touch you

he could rest his hand on your tummy!!!

but riGht when he’s about to sneak in a lil squeeze at your boob over your shirt then that’s when you slap his hand away and he frowns

just some hOURS left and it’s finally his birthday!!! he’ll just nuzzle to your neck and all would be fine :)

the lil party’s gonna be thrown in jungkook’s apartment anyways because as you’ve all come to known:

his apartment’s bigger than the one you and jimin share and that irks him because!!!

“yOU have the bigger and better aprtment why are you still cramping at ours???”

“i like staying with you guys!!!”

“nO you like staying with y/n and i come in handy when you need to steal someone’s pasta from!! i bought you tupperware and wrote your name on it but you still eat from mINE!!”

now everyone has their designated roles

jimin’s in charge of making the lasagna and he takes great pride in arranging the layers neatly and not half-assing the amount of cheese

taehyung had the great idea of wAIT what if they don’t like lasagna?? (jimin was offended by that omg who wouldn’t like my lasagna are u kiddinG)

so what he did was bring over this foldable table :D lay cups of ramen neatly :D decorate jungkook’s kettle because he realized that it looks like dOlphin when you tilt it sideways :D

and it’s now tae’s ramen station and so far the party-goers are LOVING it and it’s a close tie between him n jimin

yoongi’s in charge of food that the other two didn’t bother to think about basically

you locked jungkook in his own room lmao and had to bribe him with a kiss or two to stay there and not leave until you tell him to

you’re in charge of the decoration and not to toot ur own horn or anything but you did a pretty damn good job :D

there’s foil balloons you had to blow up and decorate meticulously

lol jimin accidentally bought the wrong ones so now it’s JUNGK00K instead of JUNGKOOK

you even learned how to fold paper cranes so u could fold the quantity of them to jungkook’s age for yoongi to stick them up to the ceiling

you EVEN bought blackout curtains and a lil disco light!!! that’s how well-put you were despite cram-planning!!

it was time to let out jungkook because the guests were starting to come in

and oh my gOD jungkook does clean up well..,.. wow

he’s dressed himself in just a white button-up but with the sleeves folded and some buttons left alone

thEn it’s the same black jeans but with a fancy belt he only pulls out whenever he goes to prissy parties!!!

and oh god

oh my

it’s his slicked hair that’s showing his forehead and tHAT’S when it sinks in you that oh.,.,. right.,.. jungkook’s growing his hair out and he’s been in a cap this past week and OH

it only hits you that oh.,.. jesus christ.,.,. jungkook has a mULLET

it’s a mullet-type of situation and it’s part-straight and part-wavy and wOW

you want nothing more but to pounce on him and it makes you audibly gUlp

jungkook’s as surprised as you were of him because w-wait a second

ok you’re wearing your favorite white shirt with the print on it that you wear at home!! he isn’t surprised

but are you wearing vOLLEYBALL SHORTS.,.,..

like as in the same volleyball shorts... that he..... adores..... a-and fantasizes over

oh my god everybody shut up

is that-

is that hIS OLD VARSITY JACKET????

the one with Jeon embroidered in the back and the one he wore to death that it still has his scent on it even if you washed it clean???

.... oh

that uH that makes jungkook put a hand over his chest

god im coming up

the party was an absolute bLAST!!

you and jungkook would stray from each other time to time because you’re each whisked away to talk but you’d always find each other after

you cAn’t contain yourselves at the sight of one another

kook keeps putting his arm around your waist and you keep squeezing his forearm

over-all it was such a great party 20/10

the girls chipped in to buy their coach jungkook (u put the idea in their head and they were amazed because they didn’t think of it) a smartwatch and he was so :D upon receiving it because wOah!!! omg he’s now a smartwatch owner sUck that kim namjoon

kim wears these fancy analog watches still and that makes jungkook roll his eyes because yEa that may be a rolex but my team did obliterate yours lmaOoo what about that huh

jimin’s gift was very heartwarming no matter how much he denies it to be

first he bought jungkook matching slippers with him because he’s so irked to see jungkook in chunky sneakers aLL the time

then uhm

an official key to the apartment and a written letter that when the two of your drive back,,, you could all do a handprint at the picture frame with the four of you and that’s jupiter’s paw included

you’re not gonna lie that dID make you tear up a little bit because wow :((( jimin used to be hesitant of jungkook at first but nOw he’s officially welcoming jungkook in with no anger whatsoever

kook also did cry a lil bit and they hugged it out

taehyung hand-knitted a blanket for jungkook with lil dolphins on them

he missed some stitches but he did his best oKAY and koo was so excited because wow omg this is so good!!!

yoongi bought jungkook a guitar because yeah.,.,. u dO get into my nerves sometimes but i care for you and i guess you’re my little brother now :)) i don’t make the rules

and as for your gift

... well

everyone’s already left and it’s just the two of you now finally

jungkook’s sat at the edge of the bed patiently because you’re fishing for the paper bag you’ve hidden and he’s sO on edge alright

he’s closed his eyes and you didn’t even tell him to so he’s THAT obedient

“you can open them now,” you’re sat on jungkook’s lap and it’s quite the tease for you to be perched near to his knees instead of his crotch but oK he won’t complain yet

it’s a box??

oh

... oH

“that’s for me??”

jungkook awes immediately when he opens to box and sees shiny silver gleam right up at him

it’s the matching thick necklace and bracelet he’s been eyeing for quite some time now yet refUses to buy

and here it is!!!! right in his hands!!!

“yes and they dOn’t allow refunds so please just wear them and don’t make yourself guilty!!”

you’re taking it from his hands and he’s smiling giddily when you clasp the cool jewelry around his neck and on his wrist

cute

and now it’s time for —

“i’m sleepy. are you sleepy yet?”

you do your part in messing with jungkook as you stifle a yawn, pretending to arrange things around the room before settling near him at the edge of the bed

he almost gives himself whiplash to look at you because you can NOT be serious

“no you’re not. you aren’t sleepy. your eyes tear up when you wanna go to bed.”

it’s endearing for you that he knows thay but you just continue to deadpan for the time-being

“i do? well i think i’m tearing up now.”

jungkook scoffs and crosses his arms across his chest because nO your eyes are dry!!!! look at them!!!! not a single tear!!!!

he’s looking at you so pointedly that it makes you chuckle, finally sitting down on his lap properly like he wanted you to that it makes him grunt

jungkook hasn’t had any decent action for a week now and even the slightest contact of you sitting on him, still-clothed, already makes him cRUMBLE

the thought that you’re in your volleyball shorts doesn’t help at all

it’s nice seeing him so flustered and willed right now,, his pupils already blOwn out and you haven’t even done anything

jungkook’s beautiful and that isn’t up to debate but even more-so up close that you could hear his labored yet trembling breathing

“you wanna kiss me?”

that dOES it for him and he almost leaps at the question but that’s when you pull back to which he audibly whines

:D

you come back again but it’s you who initiates it and jungkook practically melts at the taste of your mouth, already getting handsy as he squeezes at your thighs

he’s the one who’s gaining the upper hand and that was nOT the plan so that’s why you pull away right when he’s getting drunk on you

he’s chasing after your lips and you practically tut at him condescendingly that makes him huff again

“say please.”

aHA

jungkook’s eyes widen at that and he scoffs in disbelief because oh my god so tHIS is what you’re doing

now this is what he makes you say

and you never got him to say please because whenever you urge him to he just laUGHS upfront and it makes you pout

no jungkook’s not gonna do —

his giggling’s cut short when you let your mouth wander to his neck and right on to his sweet spot, immediately sucking on it harshly to paint your mark on

there’s slow kisses on his jugular nexy and you won’t do the same as what you did to him the first time and it’s frUstrating

add on to that with how you remind him you’re still on his lap with you grinding on him tOO pain-achingly slow

ok jungkook might say please after all

you’re coming back up to his jaw again and kissing everywhere but his lips that it’s starting to make him cave

“pl-“ he stops himself because oh gOd is he yielding but that’s when you snap too smoothly right on him, the intimate yet clothed feeling of you enough to make him moan in distress

“please?”

it’s instant relief when you’re back to kissing jungkook again and he might just bURST at this point and you’ve only been kissing him

tasting your lips is his first priority and breathing’s his second that it makes you chuckle with how needy he is, having to push him off because you know he’s getting light-headed

jungkook’s regaining his breath and he still wants mORE unsurprisingly

you’re taking off his shirt and stripping off his pants that leaves him with his boxers but on the other hand, you’re sTILL fully-clothed sans the varsity jacket

he’s about to do something with that which explains his grabby hands trYing to take off your shirt

but his hands not only get slapped away again, you’re pINNING them down back to the bed

“y/n i swear-“

he’s growing restless because he needs you right here and right now but you’re just tOO stubborn and bossy which is definitely a switch of roles

you grind on him a little too roughly than you intended to but the feeling’s more than welcome because you feel so fULL already and it makes jungkook unintentionally thrust into you

your shorts are feeling more than damp and his boxers are being a little tOo tight now

that’s when you lift yourself up from his crotch and let go of his hands, your face dangerously near his as his pupils shake

jungkook’s clearly looking at your centre and he whines when you still (purposely) won’t get what he’s trying to say

he’s always clearly had a vision of eating you out in your volleyball shorts that’s for sUre

but he didn’t imagine it like this and you know what he’s not complaining his hips try to buck up but to no avail, your finger hooked underneath his chin to make him look at you again

jungkook looks sO fucked out and he knows that far

he cries like a lost puppy with how you press your thumb to his bottom lips, your other hand making soothing circles on his chest

“you want a taste?” you ask ever so gently and that makes kook nod more than eagerly, about to pull you by your thighs and his mouth’s wAtering just by thinking about it

it’s the tut you give him again that makes him succumb, throat strained as he trains his pleading eyes on you for permission

“p-please?” jungkook’s too impatient to wait for an answer as he roughly grabs you to position your clothed core right above his face, immediately pressing his nose to inhale the scent of you with his lips ghosting your already-soaked folds — something so obscene about it that it almost makes your knees buckle, “that’s a g-good boy.”

he’s rELISHING on the slip of your tongue and he wastes no times in taking off your shorts, diving in with an eager tongue that takes you off-guard

now this is the real deal

jungkook takes mUCH pleasure in giving you yours and the unhinged and dirty moans you’re giving him are egging him on further

you taste so sweet and it’s enough to make him dizzy with how you’re opened up to him and for him only

he has a death grip on your thighs because you keep twitching and on the other hand he’s cravinG for you to take everything he’s giving you

he slips his hand to thumb at your clit in desperate circles and god the countdown to when you’re gonna reach your peak becomes alarmingly too near

jungkook doesn’t stop when you’re tugging at his hair roughly or when you’re yelling out his name like a mantra

jungkook doesn’t stop either when his face from the nose down is starting to get messy with the taste of you

doesn’t stop either when he’s starting to see your eyes become glassy and your lip trembling

absolutely doesn’t stop when you snap suddenly and gush over him because in fact, he still continues with much more fervor

jungkook was messy and kept lapping up at what you were giving him that’s enough to drive you into anoTher orgasm with how sensitive you are

holy fuck

jungkook’s laughing against your neck as you’re draped over him, making flowers bloom on your neck with his tongue as he makes you catch your breath

“there’s still another gift i haven’t showed you.”

okay nOW you’re nervous

kook stops pressing kisses and your words obviously make him perk, trying to hide his fascination and excitement but that’s poorly-done with how he’s trying to hide it

“you have mORE?? think y’already gave me heaven if i’m being honest”

he wouldn’t be opposed because honestly speaking his stamina as of the moment would last him aLL night and he’s on a high just from eating you out!!

oh my god you can’t possibly fall in love more with jungkook

you’re tracing the sweat that’s going down on the necklace and it makes you go lightheaded with how perfect he looks

the imprint of his bracelet’s marked snug on your left thigh with how hard he was gripping you earlier

he’s patiently waiting and waiting on you, drumming his fingers on your thighs in anticipation

here goes nothing!!!!

you take off your shirt and aHH jungkook visibly moans at the sight of a bare you

he’s right you are the present

but nO that’s not what you’re trying to get at

jungkook has his wandering hands taken down for the nth time this week but something about this feels a bit more special and reserved

he’s a little lost when you get off from him and instead sit beside him against the pillows, still kneeling on the bed so you could be higher than how he’s sat right now

he is mORE than lost when you smile at him gently and take his hand to —

oh

oh my god

oH MY GOD

it’s a tattoo

it’s a tiny and dainty tattoo on your rib in black ink

JJK

“jjk? that’s-“

holy fucking sHIT

everybody shut up!!!

everybody pLEASE be quiet jungkook needs a moment rn

it’s his initials

in his handwriting

on your skin.

oh my god

you’ve always adored jungkook’s tattoos i mean it’s nOt a surprise for anyone

they peak from time to time but sometimes they get covered with his coach jackets and his hoodies

and it’s at home where you can see them all

there’s a little inkling in the back of your head that oOH you’ve always wanted one like what he has

what was holding you back was that maybe it would affect your career or whatever

you and jimin read the guidelines for a whole hour and it wasn’t illegal for players to have tattoos!!!

as long as it doesn’t go against the rules and it won’t hinder your play

tattoos on the wrist or in between the fingers or in the forearm were a little risky because it’s always in direct contact with how you play

jimin was all thumbs-up on your idea because he himself has a couple of tattoos and was all wOah that’s so sweet!!!

taehyung was very warm with your idea and he swears that he’ll get one soon just give him some tIME to conceptualize what would his first one be

yoongi agreed and he alsO has tattoos himself and he was the most realistic (?) out of the four of you going “well you and jungkook better not break up lol”

he thought of it more and honestly?? he doesn’t see you and jungkook breaking up because there’s just sOMETHING alright??? something so unbreakable

jimin and taehyung and yoongi made a bet when you were getting your tat cleaned up that lmao what year would jungkook propose in

it’s your first tattoo and like you didn’t want to dive in head first and have a whole sLEEVE tattooed on the first occassion ya know

so why not the one you love?

and like it’s hidden by a shirt and obviously not a LOT of people would know about it and —

oh wow

uhhhh

jungkook’s.... crying?

he loves you sO much you have no idea

you’re tasting the salt from his tears when he kisses you so tenderly but it’s okay you don’t mind

he’s the one pinning you down this time and well he used to swear that he’s nEver the one for giggly sex

but oh god look at him now

mAYBE THAT’S WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU’RE HAPPY AND ON CLOUD NINE!!!

he has your hands flat against the mattress before he holds them :D

this is jungkook’s best birthday eVER 

“wanna spend all my birthdays with you.”

you instantly giggle to his neck and that tickled him a little bit okay

“you wanna marry me??”

you’re feeling everything at once and you have never grinned sO hard and laughed

jungkook rolls his eyes but that’s only because he might burst if he keeps looking at you

“well i don’t have the ring yet dummy but yEs i do want to marry you!!”

mrs. jeon!!!

wow that sounds hEAVENLY

you raise your head to whisper to his ear, leaning down for you instead so you wouldn’t strain yourself, “say please.”

“i hATE you,” jungkook cackles and it should be illegal to how warm and content he feels!! 

“you love me!!” there’s a lil sing-song voice and of cOURSE he does!!

he’s so whipped for you and he might go to the ends of the earth just because you insist

“solid facts.”

“my god—“ jungkook stills, laughing at you who’s underneath him before he breaks out into a grin

a little tiny ᵏᶦˢˢ on your nose

“what was life before you?”

[ellipsyb]

please talk 2 me about your comfort streamers! i would love to hear ur rambles!! /g

w o a h  ok

1. Quackity!!

First of all who the fuck tried to cancel this man for speaking his first language bitch the fuck-

Related: I would just like to say that I like very much that he speaks so much Spanish. It reminds me of my childhood in a weird way. I don’t have many Hispanic relatives, but I live in a heavily Hispanic-populated area. You could genuinely go anywhere in Houston and hear someone speaking Spanish. It’s almost nostalgic; it is a very big part of my culture. I also just genuinely like hearing people speak in other languages.

Big Q!!! Good man. Means well. Stan Quackity. He streams late a lot, which is good for me because I get restless at night and I need something to keep me busy. Watching one of his streams often makes me happy enough to sleep.

2. Eret!

BICON.

FUCK YEAH.

Some iconic looks/accessories:

- strawberry dress

- suit

- onesie

- cottagecore

- flower crown

- platform boots

- heeled boots

- rings

- paints his nails a lot

Dude has a counter to measure how many people have come out on his stream! Puffy was number two <3

Similar to Quackity, watching Eret’s streams are very calming and are a good sleep aid. He also streams late and will stream any time something stressful is actively going on, like for example he streamed on election night just to soothe people’s nerves and be a distraction. He’s fuckin awesome.

3. Sapnap!!!

ARSON MAN!

I have one of his merch hoodies! I wear it so much ksjfhghf-

He and I both live in Houston! His birthday is a day before mine!

Gems:

Dono: sapnap does it for the girls and the gays

Sapnap: *reads dono* that is true

- listens to girl in red unironically

- he’s part Greek!

- once tried to beat the world record for speedrunning minecraft, did it literally just for the memes

- very lighthearted about shipping stuff

- “If you call me ‘Snapmap’ again we’re gonna have issues.”

- yells a lot, but when he’s not yelling he has a very calming voice

4. Tubbo!

Has worn skirts on stream! Can play the piano! What more could you ask for?

Tubbo personalities:

- Big Law

- Big Crime

- TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOB

- whatever the fuck that was when ninja was on the smp (”PrAiSe tHe LoRd”)

- probably some others

Tubbo gets scared very easily sjdhfhdhf-

(See: when he and niki played a horror map; the few times he’s played fnaf; that one clip where he goes “where’s fundy?” and then screams when he sees fundy)

He and Sapnap are friends. They’re buddies.

HIM AND TOMMY <333

THEY’RE BEST FRIENDS UR HONOR

5. Tommy!!

If you search up on google, “What does TommyInnit mean?” you’ll get child as your answer.

Says he’s 6′3″, is actually 5′10″ or 5′11″

Favorite quotes/moments:

- “Just killed a woman, feeling good.”

- “Good news and bad news. Good news, I got you a woman. Bad news, she’s American.”

- “I’m a doctor [lawyer? I don’t remember what he said in this clip].” *pause* “No I’m not, but I have a gun.”

- *goes up to a random woman* “You’re my girlfriend.”

- “Can I have a couple packets of ketchup please?” *gets ketchup* “Oh my god, thank you so much.” *sprints out of the McDonald’s*

Just wants Tubbo to be happy!!! Loves his friend!! They’ve said they’re going to move in together when they graduate 🥺🥺🥺

//

thank you for letting me ramble :D

I’d have done more but it’s near midnight and I have not slept in days sdsjshdhsf

Thanks!! <3

[jindoelf]

200404 Eunhyuk Online Birthday Party (Eunhae cut)

https://youtu.be/wKfjaJyzplQ

🎁은혁이와 함께 온라인 생일파티🎁 (HAPPY BIRTHDAY EUNHYUK)

hj: i have to call donghae next. what shld i get him to say?

sd: shld i help u pick? smth hard for him to say... this kid... lets get him to say his nickname "lee donghaek"

hj: shld i just get him to say nyonyoynyoo

right donghae. what to do if he curses? they curse a lot with me. right so "nyo nyo nyo ynoo"

dh: happy birthday to you

hj: nyonynoynoy

dh: happy birthday to you

hj: nyonynoynoy

dh: my e oppa

hj: nyonynoynoy

dh: did u do ur birthday party

hj: nyonynoynoy

dh: oh u did thats nice

hj: nyonynoynoy

dh: did u eat seaweed did u talk with ur mom

hj: nyonynoynoy

dh: nyonynoynoy

hj: oh????? ur late!!!!

dh: im never late!!!

hj: ur always a step behind me

dh: ur a step behind me!!!!

hj: ur like 2m behind me

dh: nyonynoynoy

hj: u shld have did this earlier!!!

dh: nyonynoynoynyonynoynoynyonynoynoy

hj: oh u speak well. right by

dh: where are you?

dh: (in the live) happy birthday to you

hj: ??????

dh: i told u i was never late comepared to u !!!!! didnt i !!!!!! ah!!!!!!!! nyonyonyonyooo!!!!

hj: u shld have said so earlier!!!!!!!!

hj: ahhh hthats why the cake only comes out now!! i was wondering why we didnt start with the cake right away. u shld have come earlier

dh: (sings happy birthday) u have to blow the candles with ur nose

hj: shld i try one? oh it works?

eunhae: (laughs)

hj: bring me tissue!! ahhh its the first time i wear this

dh: birthday presents

hj: did you buy them

dh: what are you talking about

hj: i'll check. bring ur receipts.

dh: why do u need to do this

hj: u checked last time when i came didnt u

hj: oh u went there????

hj: bring me another tissue

dh: u don't need it. here!

hj: ???? thats not a gift thats just u promoting!!!!!

dh: no just put it on!!! put it on!!

hj: thats just u promoting!!!

dh: no!!!

hj: then u talk

dh: i really really want to meet you guys. really really really want to meet you guys. oh i will clean it up for u (the stain)

dh: u bought me couple gifts last time didnt u !!!!!!!!!!!!

hj: i did (laughs) ah this is so annoying!!!! we look crazy !!!!!

hj: oh this is shoes? ah this fucking?

hj: ??????????

(couple shoes)

hj: are you fucking crazy. youre crazy

(* pun with shoes and fuck)

hj: i cldnt even think about this (this event)

dh: u needed this right (beauty products)

hj: oh yea. is it the new one? the limited edition

dh: its just how it is

hj: the bag's too big just for these two products

dh: (pulls out couple lipbalms (?????))

hj: woooow youre the worst. this is the worst video ever (laughs) whats this

dh: mother gift

hj: oh i gave a gift for ur mom too. oh i think i bought the same gift for mom

dh: she can use it for a long time

hj: this is the worst

dh: (forces a kiss on hyukjae)

hj: wtf ?????? get off!!!!

hj: this is the worst video ever

hj: wah i want to cry

dh: of course

hj: not bc of you

hj: i cld never have imagined it.... is there water?

hj: oh right, the dalgona? oh you did a lot! then you do it (donghae)

hj: show them, is that enough?

dh: it smells like dalgona coffee

hj: wah my mind is blank

hj: oh its a cheap cake right? about 1,000W right? looks cheap

hj: oh right there was a game

dh: werent u supposed to end it in an hour

hj: idk i do whatever i want. lets do the mission together. everyone what shld i get him to say? oh english? just enligh? oh?? "no challenge no change"

hj: ma-onnnng

sw: hyok

dh: me-honnng

sw: we only call once in a year; on ur birthday

dh: i'll call u in three days

sw: wtf...?

dh: (makes weird noise)

sw: what are you doing

eunhae: (humming the tune of no challenge no change)

sw: nyonyonyo

hj: ma-ong where are you ma-ong

hj: if theres change then there is....

dh: everybody say???

sw: i think its time for your medicine

eunhae: (laughs)

hj: no challenge

sw: i can't say that here theres a lot of people

hj: (usb impersonation) yah yah happy birthday my friend

sw: yes my friend

hj: im on live broadcast

sw:???? its ruined

hj: u failed my mission. u didnt say no challenge

sw: i did

hj: its within 40s

sw: its hard

hj: its bc my birthday is 0404

sw: i kno

hj: ur 0407

next is ryeonggu. what shld i do with ryeonggu. lets hurry up. "im confident"? ok. no other corner, we'll only do this (laughs)

hj: he's not picking up. ryeonggu. ryeonguuuuu. im confident!!!! that kid... hes not busy though. he doesn't have schedules though. does he pick up ur calls? try calling him

dh: then hold this for me

dh: i shld cut off my hair

hj: right hes just not picking up right? its not just my calls right

hj: right then last is kyu. ryeonggu is a fail. hes not picking up. next is kyu. what shld we do with him. "its the worst"? i will try.i shld just sing then. he keeps saying my singing is the worst

kh: hyunnng

hj: (sings)

kh: hyunnnng

hj: (sings)

kh: what are u doing

hj: (sings)

kh: ...hello?

hj: kyu?

kh: hyung ur rly bad at singing

hj: i was just pretending

kh: ur really bad

hj: if u had to say one word what wld it be. i have to hear a word from u

kh: ah "the worst"

hj: ahh!!!! why didnt u say it earlier. its too late now! kyuu

kh: hyung

hj: im doing the birthday party

kh: i heard its at 6pm. im not doing mine bc of u.

hj: ah bc they might not watch? u pushed it back

kh: hyung dont sing

hj: i will dance

kh: ah then thats ok

hj: anyway someones here

kh: who

hj: an athlete

kh: really? lee donghae?

hj: ur good

kh: im good ofc

dh: kyukyukyukyu

kh: donghaiiii. its the two of u

hj: yes its just the two of us. d&e has to do it

hj: am i done? lets eat it

dh: do we have to drink it with a straw? i never tried it

hj: oh this is weird (lipbalm)

dh: its cool right? feels cool. drink it in oneshot

hj: do i have to mix it? no? do i just drink it like this? u hvae a coffee shop, how do i do it?

dh: just dirnk

hj: (drinks)

hj: yah!!!!! theres no milk !!!! its bitter !!!!!!

hj: ohhh youtube is fun!! shld i do it? shld we do it? dont u do it?

dh: i don't do it like that

hj: do it and i will come over to play

dh: no no no no

hj: u shld call ur youtube nononono

dh: teuk hyung does it for 4 hours

hj: oh thats a problem. hes got a disease.

dh: i iwll leave now

hj: try it first. it s weird though? is tat how its supposed to taste?

dh: thats weird

hj: is that right? is that how its supposed to taste

hj: anyway u can leave. i will see you nononono

dh: nonononono

i did the the cake, the dalgona coffee and the game. whats next. ah the most important part, the questions! i was wondering what id do in an hour but its alrdy an hour. thats why teuk hyung does it for 4hrs. and since i don't hear u its quite alright (laughs)

the coffee isnt that good, the milk is good though. yeah its good everyone

i will start eunhyuk's quiz! drum. did u hear the drum sound? theres this thing from shindongdaeng's studio. shld we try listening to applause? is it coming out? ah no? (laughs) well

quiz 1: what was the popcorn that hyukjae ate during 2ya2yao filming

hj: is that the kind of question we're doing. i did eat... kh said it was good so i ate it but i don't rmb. oh? everyone gave the answer...? is that normal? consome(?)! then i don't need to guess??

guys don't give me the answer. it was consome (?)

congratulations for being picked for the quiz. you'll get a signed cd

quiz 2: 3-word poem with lee hyukjae from some show (didn't catch which one). if u don't kno pls do another one

hj: i don't rmb. pls give me the answer. pls give me the answer!!! yah elf-yah !!! give me the answer!!!! ah u don't know? whats this... wheres the person who sent this

right 2020 version

lee : im sad bc elf dont have much interest in me

hyuk : hyukjae hyukjae always wonder where elfs are

jae : its not fun

(laughs) fail! i used to be good at those. i lsot my touch

quiz 3: what was the airport event i had at some event in 2012

hj: how am i spposed to know!!!! do u guys actualy kno ?? oh?? it was marilyn monroe???? at that was that day? ah right it was for a punishment.... right fail! it was a punishment for all about suju

quiz 4: name of the menu of the cafe that i went with yesung on i live together (suju returns)

hj: ah.... i don't even rmb the cafe we went to. i don't want to remember. why are you bringing this up? then just fail. what was the name? i rmb it was a long name thats all

(thanhxuannie)

[cupidmarwani-archive]

Big News

Summary: Sarah and Ava have big news for the groupchat.

WC: ~1.5k

[Other Bekker renamed the chat “HOUSE PARTY”]

Other Bekker: it’s official

Other Bekker: i own a house

Other Bekker: with my WIFE!!!!!!

Bekker: We’re throwing a housewarming party and everyone’s invited!

Dr. Lanik: What’s the dress code

Other Bekker: casual if you wear a suit ill kill you

Ethan Choi: When? 

Bekker: We were thinking it would start at around six or seven? It would mean a lot to us if Crockett could make it.

FreeWilly: Will there be alcohol?

Other Bekker: some of us are sober. No

no-ah: I’m in

Maggie<3: Wait who’s sober other than Crockett?

Dr. Lanik: Me

Other Bekker: me

connor: @OtherBekker there was an open bar at your wedding

Bekker: Circumstances change

Ethan Choi: This is such a fun conversation. Let’s not have it.

April: So back to the party… details!

Other Bekker: ill send the address in a bit but its gonna be potluck style. Everybody brings food. itll be pretty casual so dont be that asshole (@Dr.Lanik). starting at six ish and ending at maybe 10 or 11 depending on how tired we all are

Ethan Choi: Crockett’s program usually ends at like 5:30 so we might be a little late?

Other Bekker: ok sounds good. how is he btw

Ethan Choi: Pretty well. He’s outpatient for another few weeks and then his doctors are going to discuss long term options. Hopefully he’ll be back at work soon, too

April: Tell him we’re proud of him?

Ethan Choi: As soon as I pick him up tonight.

-

Sarah: are we telling them tonight?

Wifey: I was thinking so, yes. I mean, we have our house, and the paperwork went through.

Sarah: im so excited

Wifey: Me too, honey

-

Nat: Not to alarm anybody but whoever’s in charge of Connor right now, come to treatment 4

FreeWilly: love the implication that we take turns babysitting him

Dr. Lanik: We kind of do. I think it’s Maggie’s turn.

Maggie<3: I’m not at work. Who’s next in line?

April: @QueenElsa

Queen Elsa: Fine

connor: im a big boy i can take care of myself

Nat: You literally have a concussion

Ethan Choi: Why?

Nat: He fainted after a surgery. His sugar is low on the finger prick and he said he hasn’t had any water since his shift started

Dr. Lanik: @connor We’ve talked about this

connor: ok boomer

Dr. Lanik: @connor Stop calling me a boomer! We’re the same age!

connor: ok

connor: boomer

Bekker: Can you grow up @connor

connor: no

Queen Elsa: Update for everyone, Connor is getting a CT. He’s eating a Snickers bar right now and we’re pushing fluids

FreeWilly: youre not you when youre hungry

Dr. Lanik: @Bekker @OtherBekker What day will your housewarming party be? My daughter’s birthday is Friday.

Maggie<3: IM SORRY YOUR WHAT

Other Bekker: ?????

Bekker: We were thinking Saturday.

April: @FreeWilly Did you know about this???????

FreeWilly: uh yeah?

no-ah: Why did none of us know you had a daughter?

Dr. Lanik: I just don’t see how it’s any of your business.

Nat: How old is she? Who’s her mother? What school does she go to? How did we go this long without knowing?

[Dr. Lanik has sent an image to the chat]

Dr. Lanik: This is Emma, she’s almost eleven, and this is the most information any of you will ever be getting about her.

Ethan Choi: Well this has been a wild ride

Other Bekker: now taking bets on how crockett will react. $10 says he thinks its a joke

no-ah: Coward. He knows everything. $20 says he already knew.

Other Bekker: youre on

Queen Elsa: ...Anyways, Connor’s CT came back alright. It’s a minor concussion; he’ll be fine soon. 

Maggie<3: That’s good

Dr. Lanik: @FreeWilly and I will look after him.

Ethan Choi: Just picked up Crockett, he says hi. He also has letters for each of you as part of his process

Nat: That’s sweet

Ethan Choi: I have been assured none of them contain nudes

Other Bekker: thank g-d

Ethan Choi: I’ll be giving them to you all at work.

Ethan Choi: Crockett will be cooking something I won’t even try to pronounce for the housewarming party

Other Bekker: his cooking is all so good...

no-ah: It slaps

Queen Elsa: Is it that pasta thing??? With the crawfish????

Ethan Choi: Honestly, I don’t know.

Nat: Owen and I are bringing cookies.

Bekker: Important question, @Dr.Lanik… will Emma be coming?

Dr. Lanik: No. I don’t want her near any of you.

connor: hes got a point

Maggie<3: Have you never, in your life, had to bring her to a doctor?

Dr. Lanik: We use East Mercy so that you all keep your noses out of my life.

FreeWilly: ouch

April: I mean, if I had a daughter, I wouldn’t want any of you near her either.

Nat: Harsh, I trust you with my son

April: You’re different.

Bekker: Do I hear wedding bells?

Nat: @April What if we kissed in the doctor’s lounge… and we’re both girls?

Nat: Haha just kidding

Nat: Unless…?

April: Did you just hit on me with a meme

Nat: Did it work?

Other Bekker: another win for the gaydies

Other Bekker: THEY BOTH JUST WENT INTO THE DOCTORS LOUNGE JHGFKHFRH

Ethan Choi: Crockett laughed 

connor: do you read these messages to him?

Ethan Choi: Sometimes. He likes to be in the loop.

FreeWilly: hot take but. we could just add him back to the chat?

Ethan Choi: He’s not ready for that yet, but he does like to be updated on your lives and one-on-one texting is stressful for him

Other Bekker: we spend more time talking about crockett now than we did when he was in the chat

no-ah: Sweet I have my Crockett letter

Ethan Choi: I'll put them in your lockers. My shift is starting so I'm turning my phone to silent. 

Other Bekker: Crockett Time

Bekker: Did he write me one?

Other Bekker: @Bekker both mine and yours are in my locker i think. one is for "blonde bekker" and one is for "brunette bekker"

no-ah: That's what he has your contacts saved as 

Queen Elsa: Mine is just a smiley face sticker in an envelope?

Other Bekker: jsyk we should probably keep these private! this is important to him

Maggie<3: I'm so excited to see him again on Saturday, I've missed him.

FreeWilly: He's been busy. I think his program is like eight to five every day but Sunday

Nat: What's that even like?

Other Bekker: they have an in house aa group that meets a few times a day and theres a ton of other support like therapy to get to the root of the problem. i mean before he got sober the first time he was self medicating 

Other Bekker: he does a lot of art therapy i think. when he was inpatient he kept mailing paintings to my wife and i 

-

Curry (Not Dr.): Hey, it's Elsa Curry from Med. Sarah gave me your number. I was just wondering why you gave me a sticker?

Crockett: dont u put them on the inside of your binder? the one u put ur case notes in at the end of ur shift 

Curry (Not Dr.): How did you know that?

Crockett: u pull ur binder out when ur stressed to reference old cases. i thot u might like another sticker so u know ur not in this alone

Crockett: :)

-

[crickett has renamed the chat "dick bros"]

crickett: @connor do u wanna fuck again this weekend lmao

connor: ???

connor: i thought that was a one time thing

Ethan Choi: It doesn't have to be. 

-

Maggie<3: @Bekker @OtherBekker Sorry I'm running a little behind! I couldn't find my keys

Bekker: No harm, no foul!

[Bekker has sent an image to the chat]

Bekker: Definitely hurry, we're having so much fun!

-

Crockett: baby

HUBBY: I'm sitting right beside you.

Crockett: ik but im feeling kinda overwhelmed 

HUBBY: Do you want to go home?

Crockett: i think i just need air will you cover for me if someone comes looking

-

Other Bekker: THANK YOU @Maggie<3 FOR ACTUALLY HELPING CLEAN UP 

FreeWilly: sorry!

connor: sorry ahhhhhh i didnt think about it 

Nat: Congrats again, you two, this is huge!

April: ^^

no-ah: Will we get to meet her, or will she be a secret like Laniks daughter?

Bekker: You'll all definitely get to meet her, but let's not do so much at once? Adjusting to a new home is hard, and from what the adoption agency tells us, she's had a rough go of it.

no-ah: Of course! 

Queen Elsa: No little girl could have a better home! Congratulations on your daughter and I wish you really good luck. If you ever need help, we're all here!

Dr. Lanik: She's about eight, right?

Bekker: Yes

Dr. Lanik: If she needs help adjusting, let me know, and maybe Emma and I can help. She was about that age when I adopted her.

connor: the Lanik lore we are getting today omg

Dr. Lanik: You'll both be great parents, and @OtherBekker don't hesitate to let me know if you need extra time off. This is a big deal and you shouldn't have to stress about work when you should be worrying about your family. @Bekker I'll also ask Dr. Latham to be lenient with you as well.

Other Bekker: thank you from both of us <3

connor: who knew lanik had a heart. 

[randomkposts]

Hello

I figured I should start with wall of quotes. Cause whynot

Quotes “It's hard to hate my prep team. They're such total idiots." - Katniss.”

“Here's some advice. Stay alive.” “The cat that Prim got hates me, I think partly because I tried to drown it.” “District 12: Where you can starve to death in safety.”“No. Now, shut up and eat your pears."

” It's lovely. If only you could frost someone to death." "Don't be so superior. You can never tell what you will find in the arena. Say it's a gigantic cake-”“Yes, frosting. The final defense of the dying.”

“Technically, I am unarmed. But no one should ever underestimate the harm that fingernails can do. Especially if the target is unprepared.”

"Well, leprechauns. You know they're not real, don't you?""Let us proceed under the assumption that the fairy folk do exist and that I am not a gibbering moron."

"I majored in Ancient History. You have your own page in the 'Criminally Insane' section."

"Really, Butler, I must begin choosing my business associates more carefully. Hardly a day goes by when we aren't the victims of some plot.""The punching is not helping my concentration, by the way.""Oh, brilliant. I must write that one down in my witty retorts book."

"The pixie is crazy! Give me your gun, Holly. I'm going to shoot him.""Excuse me, Captain. Are you two going to weep salty tears of admiration over a helmet all night, or do we have matters to discuss?"

"This is a well. You might think that there is something to it... But in fact it is just an ordinary well."

Woman in Ur : Hey, where are you four brats off to now? What...? You're going to go save the world...? Did you get hit on the head or something!?

Gilgamesh : Enough expository banter. It's time we fight like men. And ladies. And ladies who dress like men. For Gilgamesh...IT IS MORPHING TIME! Galuf : Bartz! Stop that! Bartz : But it's fun! poke, poke, poke... Bartz : Jumping Christmas!

Edgar : "That's Shadow! He'd slit his mama's throat for a nickel!" Kefka : "This is sickening! You sound like chapters from a self-help booklet! Prepare yourselves!" Locke : "Hey! Call me a TREASURE HUNTER, or I'll rip your lungs out!" Edgar : "If something were to happen to me, all the world's women would grieve!" Setzer : "My life is a chip in your pile. Ante up."

Yuffie : So! I saved the great Vincent Valentine! Do I get any thanks?

Squall : Right and wrong are not what separate us and our enemies. It's our different standpoints, our perspectives that separate us. Both sides blame one another. There's no good or bad side. Just two sides holding different views. Squall : I dreamt I was a moron...

Seifer : Great, I have one chicken-wuss and one kid who just entered puberty in my team! Squall : ...Whatever.

Auron: The red carpet has teeth. Auron: Outside the dream world, life can be harsh, even cruel, but it is life.

Rikku: Memories are nice, but that's all they are.

Kimahri: Pick spot. Shut up. Wait.

Rikku: Do you think we need a password? Paine: How about 'Kick..it's..ass' Paine : The hardest person to know is one's self.

Raogrimm: People are capable of kindness beyond angels, yet we also commit sins that would put a demon to shame... Lonely Chocobo: Warkkkkk!!! Gweh!!!! Warkkkk

Naja Salaheem : (After Abquhbah faints when he realizes that he's speaking to the empress) Nothing to be concerned about, Your Magnificence. Mercenaries are trained to sleep anywhere, anytime if the opportunity presents itself.

Lightning: Worst birthday ever. Lightning: It's not a question of can or can't. There are some things in life you just do. Lightning: We live to make the impossible possible! That is our focus!

White Mage: Hi. I was just wondering if you knew how much we've suffered because of you. Good day. [after finding the Falcon Rydia : It's not yours. Edge : That's okay, it would be happy to be used by us!

...That's General Leo.. He could be my friend if he weren't my enemy.

You think a minor thing like the end of the world was gonna do me in?

"What a cute doggy!' "Leave us. The dog eats strangers...'

This should be fun. When do we leave?

Read my lips - mercy is for wimps! There's a reason "oppose" rhymes with "dispose"...If they get in your way, kill them!I don't care for the appearance of this pitiful little hamlet... So burn it!!

Figaro Guard : Kefka's "One shy of a six pack!" Imperial soldier : I oppose peace! Narshe resident : Narshe is a neutral city.! We want no war here, but that %#$@& Empire won't listen! South Figaro Resident : We may be thieves, but at least we have goals in life!

Cyan: This is the Phantom Train. It carries the departed to the other side. Sabin : Wait! I don't want to go THERE!

Strago: Go to your room! Relm : I will not! What a fussy old man! Strago : Relm! Is that you, my dear? You're alive! Relm : Idiot! Of course I'm alive! Strago : Oh, I'm so happy..." Relm : Did you think I was gonna check out before you, old man? Strago : You're as foul mouthed as ever, bless your heart!

Shadow: I know what friendship is... and family...

"It's not my problem."

"Don't fight here! You'll ruin the flowers!" "I think they believe I have what it takes to be in SOLDIER!" "Mine is special. It's good for absolutely nothing!"

Don't need no appointment... This is a 'mergency! Anyone who don't wanna get their face bashed in better git outta the way!! "I've got the wrong person."

W-wait a second. I won't run or hide. Yes, I was a spy. I was hired by the Shinra. I couldn't help it. How 'bout if we continue like nothing ever happened?

Shut up! Sit your ass down in that chair and DRINK YOUR GODDAMN TEA!

This's gonna be a big splash. Hold on to your drawers, an' don't piss in 'em!!

Maybe God'd forgive an ugly shit like you, but I won't!

I don't know what the hell it is, but it's falling from the sky. Hmpf! It's not even an omen.

Hey, do you know who I am? I'm Cid—that's who the hell I am! Now just let me handle it!

I don't want to regret not having done something later.

I always thought this planet was so huge. But lookin' at it from space, I realized it's so small. We're just floatin' in the dark. ...kinda makes you feel powerless. On top of that it's got Sephiroth festerin' inside it like a sickness. That's why I say this planet's still a kid. A little kid sick and trembling in the middle of this huge universe. Someone's gotta protect it. Ya follow me? That someone is us.

We're busy runnin' back and forth! Even my bikini goddess would be pantin' about now!

Oh, GAWD! If I knew this was gonna happen, I would've taken rope escape lessons more seriously!!

Escape from a world of illusions... Hmph... I wonder which is better.

I know you want my help because I'm so good!

Cloud, put me in your party, so I can get off this ship. Cloud...sign this. It's a contract that says when the war is over, all the materia will belong to me.

The stars shine so bright, like glowing materia... reach up and grab one. GROSSNESS! Don't mess with me old man! You don't even have any Materia!

Citizens, unite! Come to the light, Mako energy. Power is truth. Shinra is the future. Real happiness can be found in obedience to the company People are ignorant. They'll feel better as long as someone is punished.

Godo : Go! Survive till the end! And return! With the Materia! Doctor in Mideel : You can see for yourself what things look like, but at least no one was seriously hurt. We're just very unhappy now. Junon soldier : I'm learning to be a delinquent soldier!! I just can't seem to get the hang of it! Reeve Tuesti : What may be a few to you was everything to those who died...

Barret : She ain't gonna show up. 'Least this time she didn't steal our materia. Guess we gotta be thankful for that. Yuffie : How could you say that!? I came all the way here after being seasick as a dog! I didn't go through all that just to have you guys have the best parts all to yourselves!

...A speech? Forget it. Cut the mic!

You're-going-to-like-me! You're-going-to-like-me! Did it work?

D-Do you have any...hot dogs left?

...The HELL! Man...Now this is what I call boring. This ain't right, man!

YOOOO!!! The HELL you doin'!!!?

I'm a pretty lucky guy. Hand in hand with two beautiful girls.

That is sooo vague!

Super-Duper-Mega-Bummer!!

Well, Zell was riding his T-Board in the hallways of Garden. He made a sharp turn and went straight into the woman's res...

Sharpshooters are loners by nature... We hone our instincts, pour our whole being in a single bullet. The pressure of the moment... An instant of tension... That's what... I have to face alone...

Well, fine then! We WILL have a good time!

Thanks for the support, but I never miss my target.

Well, we could skin this little guy and wear him as a disguise...

I say things that get a rise out of some people. Just don't let it bother you and we'll get along fine.

Ooh neato! A hole in the middle of no-where!

You've all heard this before. How life has infinite possibilities. I don't believe that one bit. There weren't many paths for me to choose. Sometimes, there would only be one. From the limited possibilities I faced, the choices I made have brought me this far. That's why I value the path I chose... I want to hold true to the path that HAD to be taken.

Let's just fire like crazy and make a big hole, BOOM!

...Speeding. Let's go arrest that student for violation of academy regulations. Listen up! Teamwork means staying out of my way. It's a Squad B rule.

This is the scene where you swear your undying hatred for me!

And so, Laguna runs for dear life. She got upset and put fruit jam in your shoes. You were almost in tears!

Fujin: DISTURBING.RAGE!SHOCK!GOOD. CONVENIENT.PERSUASION, USELESS. SEIZE!IGNORE.RUN!ELLONE? NOT HERE.FATIGUE POSSE... We are. We always will be. Because we're a posse, we want to help you. Whatever it takes to fulfill your dream, we're willing to do. But... You're being manipulated, Seifer. You've lost yourself and your dream. You're just eating out of someone's hand. We want the old you back! Since we can't get through to you, all we have now to rely on is Squall! It's sad... Sad that we only have Squall to rely on... Seifer! Are you still gonna keep goin'?

Big Sister: I can't wait until I meet a guy that I can scream at and exchange blows with!

Quistis : You're the squad leader. Good luck to you. Seifer : ...Instructor. I hate it when people wish me luck. Save those words for a bad student who needs them, eh? Quistis : Alright, then. Good luck, Seifer. Seifer : [to Fujin and Raijin] Add Instructor Trepe to the list. Zone : Our plan is to...Selphie : ...Blow it to smithereens with a rocket launcher!? Zone : [taken aback] ...Ahh...not quite... Rinoa : Oh, shut up! I made it like that on purpose. It represents my hatred towards Deling. Zell : Hatred, eh? Yeah...right. Selphie : It's one of the...ugliest things that I've ever seen in my life. You must really hate him.

You don't need a reason to help people.No cloud, nor squall shall hinder us!Piece of cake. I'm an escape artist.

In the end, it boils down to two simple choices. Either you do or you don't. You'd think with all the problems in this world, there'd be more answers. It's not fair... but that's the way things are. The choice is yours.

SON OF A SHOOPUFF!

Al Bhed is Al Bhed. Rikku is Rikku. Rikku swore to protect Yuna. And Rikku is not a liar. Kimahri can tell. So, she is a friend.

Why are you still here, sir? (pause as Auron looks at him) I beg your pardon. We Guado are keen to the scent of the Farplane.

Rikku : Did you...hit your head or something? Tidus : Um, you guys hit me. Rikku : Oh, right...do you remember anything before that?

Sometimes, when I got a lot on my mind, it just helps to go, "AAAAAAAAAAAH!"

"Once Lady Yuna fixes her hair, we leave." "Guard your emotions first, then guard your summoner." "Ha! Legendary guardian? I was just a boy. A boy about your age actually. I wanted to change the world too, but I changed nothing. That is my story." "Don't look to others for knowledge. This is your story."

Don't think it's just a game. Your life's on the line. "You. It's what's for dinner." You. Are. Hired."

Barkeep : Mish Yoona, what can I do for yoo?

Yuna : Duck Soup! Paine : Duck what?

Rikku : I'm gonna kick you in the spleen! Paine : Spleen?

Lightning : (to soldier).Nice gun. Noctis : Goodbye, whoever you are.

You sure are a keen observer of the obvious, kupo!

And I know some "little girls" who can kick your butt!

"You hit the Lord of the Titans in the eye with a blue plastic hairbrush."

Rachel: They asked me a lot of questions about you. I played dumb. Annabeth: Was it hard?"

"Love conquers all," Aphrodite promised. "Look at Helen and Paris. Did they let anything come between them?""Didn't they start the Trojan War and get thousands of people killed?" "Pfft. That's not the point. Follow your heart."'

“Ever had a flying burrito hit you? Well, it's a deadly projectile, right up there with cannonballs and grenades." "The ADHD part of me wondered, off-task, whether the rest of his clothes were made the same way. What horrible things would you have to do in your life to get woven into Hades' underwear?"

Rachel: You're a half-blood, too? Annabeth: Shhh! Just announce it to the world, how about? Rachel: Okay. Hey, everybody! These two aren't human! They're half Greek god! . . . They don't seem to care."-

"What I did next was so impulsive and dangerous I should’ve been named ADHD poster child of the year."

“You're a stalker with hooves." "I am not! I followed her to the Big House and hid in a bush and watched the whole thing.”

Well, we kind of tried to kill each other in a duel to the death." "I see. You tried the diplomatic approach.”

"Well, Percy, what have we learned today?""That three-headed dogs prefer red rubber balls over sticks?""No," "We've learned that your plans really, really bite!”

"Dude!" said a party pony as he unloaded his gear. Did you see that bear guy? He was all like: 'Whoa, I have an arrow in my mouth!”

“Boys are usually forbidden to have any contact with the Hunters. The last one to see this camp…” She looked at Zoe. “Which one was it?”"That boy in Colorado,” Zoe said. “You turned him into a jackalope.”Ah, yes.” Artemis nodded, satisfied. “I enjoy making jackalopes…”

“Christmas in the Underworld was NOT my idea. If I'd known what was coming, I would've called in sick. I could've avoided an army of demons, a fight with a Titan, and a trick that almost got my friends and me cast into eternal darkness. But no, I had to take my stupid English exam.”

“Meat!" he said scornfully. "I'm a vegetarian." "You eat cheese enchiladas and aluminum cans," I reminded him."Those are vegetables.”

"How about this: stealing is not always bad?""I don't think my mom would like that moral."

I thought about the lines Rachel had spoken in that creepy voice: about storm and fire and the Doors of Death. "Maybe," I said, "but it didn't sound so good.""No," said Apollo cheerfully. "It certainly didn't. She's going to make a wonderful Oracle!”

"My son here convinced me that perhaps I should prioritize my list of enemies." He glanced at me with distaste. "As much as I dislike certain upstart demigods, it would not do for Olympus to fall. I would miss bickering with my siblings. And if there is one thing we agree on - it is that you were a TERRIBLE father.”

Running with a drowsy child of Hades was more like doing a 3 -legged race with a life size rag doll.”

“Yay!' he said. 'Now we can eat peanut butter sandwiches and ride fish ponies! We can fight monsters and see Annabeth and make things go BOOM!”

“You know how teachers tell you the magic word is 'please'? That's not true. The magic word is 'puke'. It will get you out of class faster than anything else.”

" He tossed me a jar of thick green liquid—Greek fire, one of the most dangerous magical substances in the world. Then he threw me another essential tool of demigod heroes—duct tape”

“Juniper: Are you guys busy? Percy: Well, we’re in the middle of this game against a bunch of monsters and we’re trying not to die. Annabeth: We’re not busy. ”

Though "peanut butter" is a strange battle cry. It shall be as you say. But my son, pray this works."I am praying. I'm talking to you, right?"Oh . . . yes. Good point.”

“Let us find the dam snack bar," Zoe said. "We should eat while we can."Grover cracked a smile. "The dam snack bar?"Zoe blinked. "Yes. What is funny?""Nothing," Grover said, trying to keep a straight face. "I could use some dam french fries."Even Thalia smiled at that. "And I need to use the dam restroom." "I do not understand.""I want to use the dam water fountain," Grover said."And…" Thalia tried to catch her breath. "I want to buy a dam T-shirt."

"with great power... comes great need to take a nap"

“Oh no." I said panic rising in my chest. "No, no, no, Somebody get a can opener. I've got a god in my head!!”“Well," I said. "If you need me, I'll be outside, playing with sharp objects.”

“Fairness means everyone gets what they need. And the only way to get what you need is to make it happen yourself.”

“I guessed his name was Face of Horror. I wondered how long it had taken his mom to think of that. Bob? No. Sam? No. How about Face of Horror?”

“Now the tattoos," Zia announced."Brilliant!" I said."On your tongue," she added."Excuse me?”

“I just love family meetings. Very cozy, with the Christmas garlands round the fireplace and a nice pot of tea and a detective from Scotland Yard ready to arrest you.”

“Carter Kane, 14, died tragically in Paris when he was eaten by his sister’s cat Muffin.”

“There will be guards,” Bast said. “And traps. And alarms. You can bet the house is heavily charmed to keep out gods.” “Magicians can do that?” I asked. I imagined a big can of pesticide labeled God-Away.”

“I believe you, Sadie.""Oh really. I'm holding the bloody feather of truth, and you believe me. Well, thanks.”

I guess it started in London, the night our dad blew up the British museum.”

“The baboon is driving,” I noted. “Should I be worried?”

“Thank Ra!” She exclaimed. “Yeah, I’m alive.” “No, I almost jumped in after you. I hate the water!”

“Why did adults have to be so thick? They always say “tell the truth,” and when you do, they don’t believe you. What’s the point?”

“I must admit I’m impressed, Sadie. You controlled your magic and controlled Isis. And you, Carter, did well turning into a lizard.”

“That’s Narmer with the spoon,” I guessed. “Angry because the other bloke stole his breakfast cereal?”

“Most of Set’s forces were running towards our boat, screaming and throwing rocks (which tended to fall down and hit them, but no one says demons are bright).

"Great another mystery. I was about to suggest we ram Amos’s head against it and see if that worked.”

The stuff was so thick and rough, it made me wonder if the poor Egyptians had had to use toilet papyrus. If so, no wonder they walked sideways.”

“I looked back, but Bast and Sadie seemed fine. They were still staring at the water as if it were some amazing Internet video.”

. Why would someone display a rock? Aren't there enough of those in the world?”

“Dejardins was so stunned, he momentarily forgot how to speak English. "Ce n'est pas possible. On ne pourrait pas-”

[panda-noosh]

MY FAVOURITE TUMBLR WRITER IS OPENING REQUESTS OMG MY DAY IS MADE. Would you pleaee write a lance x reader where lance is a dolphin/seal trainer and the reader shows up to his performances 20% for the animals and 99% for the cute ass trainer? Maybe the reader can't swim and it finishes in lance teaching them to swim... Idk man do ur thing, i love you❤️

words: 2.2k 

notes:i love you, too my dear :) i hope you enjoy it! 

+++

Thiswas a big risk. You knew it was a big risk, and yet Lance McClain hadyou doing stupid stuff like this seemingly on a daily basis.

   Onceupon a time, you had been somebody who followed rules closely, neveronce daring to step out of line. The idea of getting into trouble, ofyour parents looking down on you because you had done somethingwrong, had terrified you. You had used up your teenage years beingthe good kid.

   Butthat was before you had laid eyes upon Lance McClain, and wassuddenly ready to risk it all.

   Itwas your little brothers birthday party. You had been forced to go,despite your complaints that the marine park would only leave youbored and frustrated; your parents had insisted that it was a fun dayout, and you could throw away your teenage attitude for a day tospend with your brother on his birthday.

   Youhad hesitantly agreed, but you swore you weren’t going to be veryhappy about it.

   Oh,how wrong you were.

  Forthe most part, the day was a bore. You lounged in the stands andwatched different marine mammals do cool tricks in the water, hadeven watched a few of the seals knock their trainer into the water,which was clearly not what the choreography had entailed. You weregiven the chance to stroke a sting ray, gawked at some cool lookingfish, ran away from a peacock that was randomly strutting around thepark.

   Thebig finale, though, was whenever you reached the dolphin exhibition.

   Judgingby the ecstatic crowd and the long line spilling out into the park, ashow was on. Reading the sign told you that the show in question wasa dolphin show, being led by a man known as Lance McClain.

   Itwas when you were taking your seats that you finally saw just whothis Lance McClain was.

   Tosay the breath was knocked from your lungs would be anunderstatement. It was almost a sense of panic, a clawing feeling ofI can’t sit here and watch this man dunk his head under thewater. You felt stupid, like ateenage girl with a silly crush on somebody she didn’t even know, butin a way, that was exactly what it was.

   Youtried to stand up, telling your mother that you needed the bathroom;she had grabbed your hand and told you to wait, as if you were atoddler again.

   Thathad been the beginning of the downward spiral.

   Fromthat first show on, you were desperate to see Lance again. You boughttickets to his next show, managed to speak to him a few times aboutthings that could scarcely be considered your expertise; he told youabout the dolphins and how he loved sea animals, and how working in amarine park was one of his biggest dreams as a kid. Slowly, the twoof you became friends. It even got to the point where Lance wasoffering you free tickets, just so he could talk to you after he wasfinished with his shows.

   Andhe was always soaking wet after every show, which only made yourpining ten times more difficult to keep under wraps. He would brushhis hair back from his forehead, would be panting as he made his waytowards you after every show. Then that grin, that big, stupid grinthat always seemed ten times more Lance afterhe was done performing, as if he was radiating some kind of positiveenergy that left you feeling more jittery than positive.

   Today,you were in the park after hours, which was where the rule breakingcame in.

   Youweren’t meant to be parading around the park after it had closed, butLance had insisted that it would be fine. You found that hard tobelieve, considering he had told you to keep your head down in theexact same breath. You had a slight suspicion that, if security sawyou, you would be under arrest in a matter of seconds, and Lance knewthat.

   Still,he insisted on telling you that all would be fine, and you were tooexcited to see him to question his promises.

   “Lance,if I end up getting escorted home in a police car, my parents aregonna lose their shit,” you hissed. Lance had his hand in your own,was stealthily dragging you towards the dolphin exhibit with which hewas so familiar with.

   “Shh.You’ll be fine. I’ve already told you that, as long as you stay withme, the security guards won’t even bat an eyelash.”

  Yougrunted, a subtle way of calling him out on his bullshit. He pickedup on the noise and smiled innocently at you, before he turned thecorner and led you directly into the exhibit in question.

   Thefamiliar area came into view; the massive water tank, the seats thatwere almost always filled with excited families waiting to see Lanceperform his magic. The dolphins were no longer in the tank, havingbeen sent off to their night tanks where they could peacefully getsome rest for tomorrows round of performances.

   “Wow,”you mused, looking around with wide eyes. It was different at night.The lights were still on up above, but they seemed a little dimmer,bouncing off the waters surface to create an almost eerie atmospherethat engulfed you and Lance from the moment you stepped inside.

  Lancegrinned, squeezing your hand. “Fancy a swim?”

  Your eyespopped open. “Excuse me? You’re joking.”

  “Whynot?” he asked, already slipping his hand from your own and pullingoff his three-quarter-zip jacket. You panicked, watching him shrug itfrom his shoulders as if it were the most casual thing in the world.

   Andthen he started on his belt.

  “Lance!”you hissed, darting forward and grabbing his wrist. “I’m not evenmeant to be in here! Can you imagine how much trouble I’ll get intoif they catch me swimming in the god damn dolphin tank?”

 “It’s not a dolphin tank right now,” Lance insisted, shaking yourhand off of him and tugging his belt loose. “The dolphins aren’t init, meaning it’s just a massive pool full of water – a swimmingpool, if you will. Made for swimming.”

  “Made for people whocan swim,” you grumbled. “Which I cannot.”

   Lance froze,staring at you with wide eyes. You immediately flushed, looking awayfrom his shocked expression – of course he would be shocked. Youshowed up to almost every single one of his shows, always gushedabout how amazing his skills in the water were. He must have justnaturally thought you loved water, at least knew the basics toswimming.

   Butyou didn’t.

   “Icould teach you,” he said suddenly.

   Youreyes snapped up. “I don’t think that’s a good-”

  He grabbedyour hand and started towards the pool. “It’ll be fun. I’ve alwayswanted to teach someone how to swim.”

  “I don’t even haveanything to swim in!”

  Lancescoffed. “You can swim in your clothes if you want, or I can go andfetch you a wet suit.” He looked at you, a smirk on his face. “Oryou can just do what I’m doing and do it in your underwear. We’re allfriends here. There’s nothing to hide.”

   Youflushed, trying desperately to give him an intimidating enough glare.He simply laughed at you before he started climbing up the ladderinto the massive pool of water.

   Yousilently cursed to yourself. You should have known what you would begetting yourself into when it came to Lance McClain. He would neverlet one of your daily visits be boring.

    Withhesitant fingers, you tugged your jacket from your shoulders, pulledyour shirt and jeans off and followed after him, leaving themdiscarded on the floor behind you. It was now or never, you supposed.If you got caught now, then so be it.

  Atleast you would have Lance to stick up for you if things truly didturn bad.

   Thewater was freezing. Though Lance, upon initially jumping into it, hadbarely even made a noise to warn you of just what it was you weregetting yourself into. He was floating peacefully on the surface,grinning as he watched you dip your toes in and immediately squealwith the sudden rush of cold that ran through you.

   Hechuckled, swimming forward. He laid his hands on your hips, helpingyou slowly ease into the water. And then he kept his hands there,holding you up so you wouldn’t immediately dunk under the water withyour lack of swimming practise.

   “Holdon to me,” he said. You did just that, not seeing any other option.“Now, just slowly brush your feet back and forth. This is theeasiest bit. Keeping yourself up in deep water is simple once you getthe hang of it.”

   You wanted to reply with some snarky remarkabout how of course hewould say it was simple, considering he had never known a time wherehe didn’t know how toswim. But the words got lodged in your throat, both with the feelingof Lance’s arms wrapped around you and the cold that was stillpouring itself into your veins.

   Yougritted your teeth, slowly started brushing your feet back and forth.Lance’s hands started slipping from your waist, and panic settled ineven more. You yelped, clinging to his shoulders and pulling him backto you.

   Hechuckled. “It’s okay. I’m not gonna let you go under.”

  “I– I can’t do this,” you ground out. “P-please d-don’t let go of– of me.”

  “I won’t,” Lance said, looking at youtenderly. “But just keep moving your feet. You’ll get the hand ofit.”

   You did as he said, but he didn’t let go of you theentire time, so you didn’t know whether or not your actions were evendoing anything. At this moment in time, you couldn’t empty your brainof thoughts long enough to care; his hands were on your bare hips,his face inches from your own as the two of you continued to lookdown to where your knees were bumping together beneath the water. Wasit possible that he could hear your heartbeat? Maybe he would mistakeit for trickling water.

   “Youshould have told me you didn’t know how to swim,” Lance saidsuddenly, still not looking up from his inspection of your feetbeneath the water. “I could have taught you a lot sooner. Maybeeven at a real swimmingpool.”

  “W-where’s the f-fun in that?”

  Lancesmiled. “It’s not about the fun any more, though, is it? It’s aboutteaching you how to swim.”

  “I don’t think the locationmatters. I-I’m always g-going to s-struggle.”

   Lance frowned,meeting your eyes. His skin looked particularly warm in theoff-lighting being given off from the few lights turned on aroundyou, particularly tan and welcoming. You wanted to nuzzle into him,but refrained from doing so. His hands around your waist was enough,and you didn’t want to overstep your boundaries.

    “That’snot the right attitude to have,” he said. “And, frankly, that’san insult to my teaching.”

   “I-I don’t e-even know if thisis r-right!” you chuckled. “You h-haven’t let go o-of me.”

 Lance raised a brow, and you then realised your mistake.

  “Wait,no, I-I didn’t-”

   Heunwound his hands from your waist and backstroked swiftly backwards.You cried out, panic immediately settling in and ruining any type offlow with your feet you may have once had. Your hands started beingthrown into the mix, clawing at the water as if you could somehowkeep yourself on the surface by grabbing at it. Your feet werekicking in a messy rhythm that had water flicking up over your headand splashing into your eyes.

   Youwere just about to let out a scream whenever hands grabbed onto yourwaist and lips were pressed against your own in an almost urgentmanner.

   Youchoked back the gasp of shock, eyes snapping open to see Lance wasthe one kissing you. Lance McClain, bare chested against you, handson your hips, lips on your lips. How were you meant to react to this?

   Youdid the only thing you thought plausible – you wrapped your armsaround his shoulders, wrapped your legs around his hips and held himcloser, letting the feel of his body lull you into relaxation afteryour moment of intense panic.

   Hepulled away all too soon, leaving you wanting more. You could tastethe water on his lips, his hair now dangling in his eyes as littledroplets of water sprinkled themselves down the bridge of his nose.

    Youstared at him. He stared back, only he was smiling that famous LanceMcClain smile.

   “W-whatwas that for?” you asked, no longer stuttering just because of thecold.

   Lancepulled you closer as if in response. “I couldn’t have you screamingand getting us caught, now could I?”

[ninesoftkids]

ship ur mutuals with skidz! bringing this ask meme back cause y not! friendship! woo! 💓❤️💓💖💗💕💞❣️💗❤️💞❣️

Aayyy, I love these asks! Unfortunately, Stray Kids only has nine members :( so I’ve finished the rest of my mutuals with other idols I think fit! I hope that’s ok lmao. Right. (It’s gonna be quite long so i’m going to insert the line thingy) Here we gooooo :D

·        Woojin – Andy. Thefirst person to fight your corner, but sometimes they lack belief inthemselves. An essential part of our family, just like Woojin. One of the mostcaring people I’ve met, but also definitely one of the most chaoticallyencouraging people ever. Don’t let them eat the trees. @haknveons

·        Minho – Roxi. Two bubblypeople with serious visuals! But don’t let their cuteness fool you – there’sdemons hidden beneath the angel exteriors. Just as Roxi loves to both hurt andheal us with gorgeous pictures of our faves, Minho loves to tease. The push-and-pullrelationship. Roxi the Angel, and Minho the Devil. But he cares deeply, andwould always listen to whatever worries you had. You can expect cute good nightmessages and missed Skype calls that are made up with a thousand nose kisseswhen you finally see each other. The Opposites Attract Couple @lxx-fxlix

·        Chan – Syd. Bluntand honest, forthright with their beliefs, I think Chan and her would have amazingphilosophical arguments that would end in cuddles and Disney on the sofa whilethey throw popcorn at each other. Chan could teach you Korean, and you canteach him your slang :D Also that height difference would be cute af. @hwarang-my-loves

·        Hyunjin – Mer. Twoanimal lovers with visuals to merder. 😉 You share the cutestgiggles and are always down for pillow forts and cuddle piles. Fancy dinnerwho? Give you two pizza and some fluffy dogs and you’re good to go. You’d takethe best pictures of each other and you’d be the Aesthetic Couple @softstan4softboys

·        Changbin – Liz. Edgelord?Bitch, where? Like Changbin, your aesthetic is the opposite of your personality.You’re both whole dorks who love fiercely and are genuinely amazing people. Plus,I just really like imagining Changbin doing aegyo for the last Cadbury’schocolate or something and you judging him so hard, but doing the exact samething thirty seconds later. Softies. Both of you. The Tsundere Couple @darkaegyo

·        Jisung – Hae. Two kidswith unbelievable and unending energy. Plus the visuals? God damn you’d look sogood together. Another Aesthetic Couple. Give the two of you energy drinks andyou’ll be bouncing off the walls. Expect midnight runs to your local supermarket,throwing grapes into each others mouths, cute holiday vlogs where Jisung triesto befriend a squirrel and you throw peanuts at him. @squirrelboiii

·        Felix – Csen. He’dlove to watch you draw in the park while he kicks a ball around with the boysand pretend he’s not trying to figure out who you’re drawing – he hopes that it’shim. Teaching each other to cuss in other languages. He’d roll his eyeswhenever you scream over Namjoon or a Stray Kids Comeback but secretly love howexcited you get about things you love. The sarcasm also runs strong in thisship. Cute selfies returned with a ‘I did it better’. 100% down to prank eachother. The Friends to Lovers Trope we all adore. @lee-minho

·        Seungmin – Esther.People can’t decide if you’re the most savage or the most soft couple to exist.You both put so much thought into what you do for others and you’re so treasuredby everyone who gets to call you a friend. Birthdays are always anticipatedbecause you try to outdo each other in what presents you get each other. You metat a theme park, both the odd person in a group and having to sit next to eachother on a ride. When the ride ends you leave the others to find some ice creamand drinks – and it isn’t your fault that you forgot you arrived with otherpeople. The Meet-Cute we all deserve. @goddamngyu

·        Jeongin – Charz. Thelittle sister we all wish we had. You and Jeongin would be the cutest ok. You’dcompete at baking and force the boys to choose which is better without themknowing whose is whose (you’d both try to bribe the boys beforehand) You’ddance long into the night, not watching the time and just laughing at eachother’s attempts at popular dances. You were probably introduced through mutualfriends at a bonfire, and spent the night arguing over who had the best randomfacts. The Must Protect Couple @strayedtoofar

And now my other mutuals! :D

·        Tayla – KimSeokjin, BTS. Both visuals and Jin would help raise your self-confidence levels byalways taking pictures of you looking cute and bragging to the boys about you. Absolutedorks, with ridiculous nicknames to match. You steal his shirts and he pretendsnot to notice because his jumpers give you sweater paws and it’s adorable. But thosesweater paws come in handy when he tells a particularly bad pun and one lookfrom Yoongi has you whapping one sleeve across his arm, despite laughing atleast as hard as Jimin. Couple Goals. @mindieu

·        Ash – Lee Jihoon, SVT. You’re another Opposites Attract Couple, but both of you makeme want to cuddle the shit out of you. Both completely adorable, you probablymet like one of your AU’s :p A penpal thing that your friends mischievouslysigned you up for and it grew from there. You’ll send him Kpop memes and thoughhe won’t understand many of them, the second he sees his face he’ll be like ‘hey!It’s me!’ He hates aegyo but he’ll do it to make you smile, even at the expenseof his dignity in front of the other members. The Pen Pal trope that I am anabsolute sucker for. @lovelyhoonie

·        Stacia – KimTaehyung, BTS. Infectious laughter would follow you everywhere you went, and you’dalways be touching each other in some way – holding hands, an arm wrappedaround your waist, you name it. Also secretly evil – together with Jungkook,you prank the shit out of the other members and no one ever links it back toyou. And why would they? Both of you have Angel faces. The Trouble Maker Couple @softtrasshh

·        Jazz – Taeyong, NCT. Istill don’t know a lot about NCT, but I think your personalities would match sowell! Both fun loving and so caring and ready to give advice if people need it.You’d bond over your protective instincts and probably spend lots of time atsmall parties with close friends, laughing over good memories. @always-a-winwin

·        Ty – Jeongyeon,Twice. Neither of you could look like a mess if you tried. Goddess-tiervisuals, I swear. I also like to think that Jeongyeon sends really cutemessages to her members and always tries her best to make everyone feel better.And you’re literally the same, in that respect. You love angst so much, and youdon’t need a happy ending, so when she finishes a sad movie or novel, you’rethere to tease her back into laughter again. Neither of you are good for myheart and you fucking know it, you demons. Pet names between you range from ‘babygirl’ and ‘sweetheart’ to ‘nerd’ and ‘oi, you’. The Playful Relationship. @softspearb

·        Bri –  Kihyun, Monsta X. Outspoken about what youthink is right and wrong. Incredibly loyal and fun-loving. Always up for anadventure, and weekends will find you two trying to get lost in the city purelyfor the fun of it! The Adventurous Couple with so many stories to tell! @b-interest

·        K – Jennie, BlackPink.You seem kinda intimidating but you’re actual fluffballs. Always have eachothers backs, and spend your weekends at the park trying to get pictures of thecutest dog – loser has to buy ice cream. The Cute Couple @straychijeu

·        Roo – Jung Hoseok, BTS.You always try to see the best in people and in every situation. You’ve beenthrough difficult situations, but you smile your way through it with your headheld high and you always show concern for everyone else, sometimes forgettingthat you deserve to be cared for too!!!! @chanscurls

·        Tia – Jin Jin,Astro. Visuals for days and with smiles that make the sun jealous! I thinktogether you’d be the couple that always out and doing something. Trying a newrestaurant, racing each other down streets, going to karaoke rooms. Your IG isfull of, not necessarily aesthetic photos, but definitely short videos of JinJin doing something amusing and you laughing in the background, or you leaningon a fence pointing at ‘the view’ with a comment from him ‘you are the view’. TheCheesy Couple! @ ????

·        Flora – Youngjae,GOT7. Very affectionate and take the cutest selfies! If someone can’t find eitherof you, it’s because you’re hiding somewhere with ice cream and a movie. You loveteaching each other your own languages and laugh together over both yourattempts at the correct accents and pronunciation! @ ???

I cannot remember some of your URL’s so like…. can the rest of y’all link this to them bc i’m an awful human being lmao

[hmhteen]

HMH Teen Teasers: NOT EVEN BONES by Rebecca Schaeffer!

If you like your books a little bloody, prepare to devour this killer YA debut: NOT EVEN BONES by Rebecca Schaeffer is about a girl who dissects dead bodies for the magical black market...but soon enough finds herself the one in danger of being sold for parts. To save herself, she must unleash the monster within.

Keep scrolling to read the first FOUR chapters of NOT EVEN BONES!

***

ONE

Nita stared at the dead body lying on the kitchen table. Middle-aged, and in the place between pudgy and overweight, he wore a casual business suit and a pair of wire-rimmed glasses with silver handles that blended into the gray at his temples. He was indistinguishable on the outside from any other human — the inside, of course, was a different matter.

“Another zannie?” Nita scowled at her mother and crossed her arms as she examined the body. “That’s not even Latin American. I thought we moved to Peru to hunt South and Central American unnaturals? Chupacabras and pishtacos and whatever.”

It wasn’t that zannies were common, but Nita had dis- sected plenty during the months she and her mother spent in Southeast Asia last year. She’d been looking forward to dissecting something new. If she’d wanted to cut up the same unnaturals as usual, she would have asked to stay with her dad in the States and work on unicorns.

Her mother shrugged, draping her jacket over a chair. “I saw a zannie, so I killed it. I mean, it was right in front of me. How could I resist?” Her black-and-red-striped bangs fell for- ward as she dipped her head and half smiled.

Nita shifted her feet, looking at the corpse again. She sighed. “I suppose you’ll want me to dissect and package it for sale?”

“Good girl.” Her mother grinned.

Nita went around to the other side of the dead body. “Care to help me move it to the workroom?”

Her mother rolled up her sleeves, and together they heaved the round, deceptively heavy body down the hall and onto a smooth metal table in the other room. White walls and fluorescent lights made it look like a hospital surgery room. Scalpels and bone saws lay in neat lines on the shelves, and a scale for weighing organs rested in front of a box of jars. In the corner, a tub of formaldehyde caused everything to reek of death. The smell kept sneaking out of the room and making its way into Nita’s clothes. She found it strangely comforting. That was probably a bad sign.

But, if Nita was being honest with herself, most of her habits and life choices were bad signs.

Her mother winked at Nita. “All ready for you.”

Nita looked down at her watch. “It’s nearly midnight.” “And?”

“And I want to sleep sometime.”

“So do it later.” Her mother waved it aside. “It’s not like you have anything to get up for.”

Nita paused, then bowed her head in acceptance. Even though it had been years since her mother had decided to illegally take Nita out of school, she still had some leftover instinct telling her not to go to bed too late. Which was silly, because even if she’d had school, she’d gladly have skipped it for a dissection. Dissections were fun.

Nita pulled on a white lab coat. She always liked wearing it— it made her feel like a real scientist at a prestigious university or laboratory somewhere. Sometimes she put the goggles on even when she didn’t need to just so she could complete the look.

“When are you heading out again?”

Her mother washed her hands in the sink. “Tonight. I got a tip when I was bringing this beauty back. I’m flying to Buenos Aires.”

“Pishtacos?” asked Nita, trying to hold in her excitement. She’d never had a chance to dissect a pishtaco. How would their bodies be modified for a diet made completely of human body fat? The promise of a pishtaco dissection was the only thing that had convinced Nita moving to Peru was a good idea. Her mother always knew how to tempt her.

Nita frowned. “Wait, there are no pishtacos in Argentina.” Her mother laughed. “Don’t worry. It’s something even better.”

“Not another zannie.” “No.”

Her mother dried her hands and headed back toward the kitchen, calling out as she went, “I’m going to head to the airport now. If all goes well, I should be back in two days.”

Nita followed and found her sitting, booted feet on the kitchen table as she unscrewed the top of the pisco bottle from the fridge and took a swig. Not cocktail-drink pisco, or mixed-with-soda pisco, just straight. Nita had tried it  once when she was home alone, thinking it would be a good celebration drink to ring in her seventeenth birthday. It didn’t burn as much as whisky or vodka, or even sake, but it kicked in fast, and it kicked in hard. Her mother had found her with her face squished against the wall, crying because it wouldn’t move for her. Then Mom had laughed and left her there to suffer. She showed Nita the pictures afterward — there was an awful lot of drool on that wall.

Nita hadn’t sampled anything in the liquor cabinet since.

“Oh, and Nita?” Her mother put the pisco on the table. “Yeah?”

“Don’t touch the head. It has a million-dollar bounty. I plan to claim it.”

Nita looked down the hall, toward the room with the dead body. “I’m pretty sure the whole wanted-dead-or-alive thing ended in the Old West. If you just turn this guy’s head over, you’ll be arrested for murder.”

Her mother rolled her eyes. “Why, thank you, Nita, for teaching me such an important lesson. Whatever would I do without you?”

Nita winced. “Um.”

“The zannie is wanted for war crimes by the Peruvian government. He was a member of the secret police under the Fujimori administration.”

No surprise there. Pretty much every zannie in the world was wanted for some type of war crime. When your biological imperative was to torture people and eat their pain, there were only so many career paths open to you.

That reminded Nita — there was an article in the latest issue of Nature on zannies that she wanted to read. Someone who had clearly dissected fewer zannies than Nita, but with access to better equipment,  had written a detailed analysis of how zannies consumed pain. There were all sorts of theo- ries about how pain was relative, and the same injury on two people could be perceived completely differently. The scientists had been researching zannies — was it the severity of the injury that fed them, or the person’s perception of how much it hurt?

They’d also managed to prove that while zannies could consume emotional pain, as well as physical, the effect was significantly less. Emotional and physical pain receptors over- lapped in the brain center, so the big question was, why did causing other people severe physical pain feed zannies, while causing severe emotional pain had less effect? Nita privately thought it was because physical pain had the added signals from nociceptors, but she was curious to see what others thought.

Her mother continued, oblivious to Nita’s wandering mind. “A number of interested parties have offered very large bounties for his head. They, unlike the government, don’t care if he’s alive to face trial.” There was a sharp flash of teeth. “And I’m happy to oblige them.”

She rose, put the pisco away, and pulled on her burgundy leather jacket. “Can you have him all packed up by the time I get back?”

Nita nodded. “Yeah, I think so.”

Her mother came over and kissed the top of her head. “What would I ever do without you, Anita?”

Before Nita could formulate a response, her mother was out the door. There was a creak and then a bang, and the house was silent. When her mother departed, sometimes Nita felt like she took more than just noise. She had a presence, a tangible energy to her that filled the house. Without her, it felt hollow. Like the life had left, and there was only a dead zannie in its place.

Which, really, there was. Nita turned back to her newest project and allowed herself a small smile. A pishtaco or a chupacabra would have been better, but she’d still enjoy a zannie.

The first thing she did was empty its pockets. An old- fashioned timepiece, some Brazilian reais (no Peruvian soles though, which was odd), and a wallet. Nita gazed at it a long time before putting it on the tray, unopened. Her  mother would have already taken the credit cards and used them to get as much cash as possible before ditching them. The only other things left in the wallet would be identity cards, club memberships — things that would tell her about the person she was dissecting.

Nita had learned a long time ago — you don’t want to know anything about the person whose body you’re taking apart.

Better to think that it wasn’t a person at all. And really — it wasn’t. This was a zannie.

Nita took an elastic and tied her hair back in a puffy attempt at a ponytail. Her hair tended to grow sideways in frizzy kinks instead of down. In the glow of the fluorescent lights, its normally medium-brown color took on an orange tint. No one else thought it looked orange, but Nita insisted— she liked orange.

She put a surgical mask over her mouth, just below her freckle-spattered cheekbones, before putting the goggles on. After snapping on a pair of latex gloves, she rolled her tool set over to the metal slab where the body rested. She slipped her earbuds in and flicked on her Disney playlist.

It was time to begin.

  Nita couldn’t remember a time when she hadn’t been fascinated by dead things — perhaps because her home was always full of them. As far back as she could remember, her parents had acquired the bodies of unnaturals and sold the pieces on the internet. The darknet, to be specific. Black market body part sellers didn’t just post their items on eBay. That was how you ended up with a short visit from the International Non- Human Police — INHUP — and a long stint in jail.

When Nita was younger, she used to run around the room, bringing her parents empty jars. Big glass ones for the heart, small vials and bags for the blood. Afterward, she’d label them and line them up on the shelf. Sometimes she’d stare at them, pieces of people she’d never met. There was something calm- ing about the still hearts, floating in formaldehyde. Something peaceful. No more beating, no more thumping rhythm and noise. Just silence.

Sometimes, she would look at the eyes, and they would stare back. Direct, open gazes. Not like living people, who flicked their eyes here and there while they lied, who could cram an entire conversation into a single gaze. The problem was, Nita could never understand what they were saying. It was better after people were dead. The eyes weren’t so tricky anymore.

It took Nita all night and the better part of the next day to finish with the zannie, put everything in jars of formaldehyde or freezer containers, and clean the dissection room until it sparkled.

The sun was up, and she didn’t feel tired, so she went to her favorite park on the cliffs overlooking the ocean. Tropical trees with large, bell-shaped flowers covered the benches like a canopy, and blue and white mosaics patterned the wall that prevented people from tumbling over the side of the cliff and into the sparkling waters below. Newspapers sat abandoned on the benches, from tabloids announcing Penelope Alvarez looks twenty at age forty-five. Good skin care or something more “unnatural”? to official news sources with headlines like Should Peru sign into INHUP? The advantages and disadvantages to an extraterritorial police force for unnatural-related incidents.

Peru was one of the only South American countries left that wasn’t a part of INHUP. There were always a few countries on every continent that stayed out so that black market dealers had somewhere to flee when INHUP finally nailed them. Certain people paid politicians handsomely to ensure it stayed that way.

Nita took a seat far away from the other people in the park. Under the shade of a floripondio tree, she cracked open her medical journals on unnaturals.

Sometimes it was frustrating reading them and knowing they were wrong about certain things. While lots of unnaturals were “out” and recognized by the world, most still hid, afraid of public backlash. So when the journals talked about zannies being the only species of unnatural that consumed nontangible things, like pain, Nita wished she could point out that there were creatures who consumed memories, strong emotions, and even dreams. INHUP just hadn’t officially recognized them yet. INHUP was big on doing damage control, and part of trying to decrease racism and discrimination against unnaturals was not telling people just how many types there were.

It also kept people like Nita’s mother from finding out about them. Sometimes.

Nita whiled the afternoon away in the shade of the tree, devouring medical research like candy, until the sun dipped so low there wasn’t enough light to read by.

When Nita got home, she was greeted by a string of exple- tives.

She crept into the hall, shoulders tight with tension. Her mother could be unpredictable when angry. Nita had been on the receiving end before and wasn’t eager to repeat the experience.

But ignoring her mother was more dangerous, so Nita padded into the kitchen.

“What are you doing?” Nita gaped, staring at the mess.

Her mother tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and gave Nita a wry smile. Around her, empty shipping crates littered the floor, along with packing materials like bubble wrap and Styrofoam worms. A gun sat on the kitchen table, and Nita briefly wondered what it was doing out.

“I want to have the zannie parts shipped out tomorrow.

We’ve got something new, and to be frank, this apartment isn’t big enough to hold all the parts.” Her mother flashed her another smile.

Nita was inclined to agree. Her dissection room was already at capacity, and they’d only dissected one zannie. There really wasn’t room for a second body.

“Something new, huh? I take it everything went well, then?” Nita’s mother laughed. “Do things ever go well with unnaturals that aren’t on the list?”

Among the unnaturals that were public knowledge, there was a list of “dangerous unnaturals” — unnaturals whose continued existence depended on  them  murdering other  people. It wasn’t a crime to kill them in INHUP member countries, it was “preemptive self-defense.” But anything not on the list, the harmless unnaturals (which was most of them, in Nita’s experience), it was very much a crime to kill.

Her mom mostly brought Nita unnaturals on the list. Mostly.

Nita knew her mother had probably killed a lot of not-evil, not-dangerous people and sold them. She tried not to think about it too much, because really, there wasn’t much she could do about it, was there?

Besides, they were always dead by the time they got to Nita. And if they were already dead, it would be a shame to let their bodies go undissected.

Speaking of . . .

“What did you bring back?” Nita asked, weaving through the crates to the fridge, where she took out last night’s leftovers and shoved them into the microwave.

“Something special. I put it in the dissection room.”

Nita felt her fingers twitch, the imaginary scalpel in her hand making a sliding cut through the air, like a Y incision. She couldn’t wait for the slow, relaxing evening, just her and the body. The straight autopsy lines, the jars full of organs watching over her, like her own weird guardian angel.

She shivered with anticipation. Sometimes she scared herself.

Her mother looked at Nita out of the corner of her eyes. “I have to say, this one was tricky to get.”

Nita removed her food from the microwave and sat down at the kitchen table. “Oh, do tell?”

Her mother smiled, and Nita settled in for a good story. “Well, it wasn’t hard at the beginning. Buenos Aires was lovely, and hunting down my tip was easy. Even acquiring our new . . . I don’t even know what to call him.”

Nita raised her eyebrows. Her mother knew every unnatural. It was her job. This one must be something really rare.

“Well, anyway.” Her mother sat down beside her. “It wasn’t even so bad getting him. Security wasn’t too much of an issue, easily dealt with. The problem was getting him back.”

Nita nodded. Airlines usually frowned on stuffing dead bodies into overhead bins.

Her mother gave her a conspiratorial wink. “But then I thought, well, why don’t I just pretend he’s a traveler? So I put him in a wheelchair, and the airline never even guessed.”

“Wait, a wheelchair?” Nita scowled. “But wouldn’t they notice that he didn’t, well, move or breathe or anything when they were helping him to his seat?”

She laughed. “Oh, he’s not dead. I just drugged the hell out of him.”

Nita’s fingers twitched, then froze. Not dead.

She gave her mother a sickly smile. “You said you put him in my room?”

“Yes, I spent the morning installing the cage. Bugger of a thing. You know they don’t make human-size cages anymore? And I had to get the handcuffs at a sex shop.”

Nita sat there for a long moment, smile frozen like a rictus on her face. Then she rose and began making her way through the crates to her dissection room.

Her mother followed. “This one’s a little different. He’s quite valuable, so I’d really like to milk him a bit for blood and such before we harvest the organs.”

But Nita wasn’t listening. She had opened the door to see with her own eyes.

Part of her beautiful, sterile white room was now taken up by a large cage, which had been bolted to the wall. Her mother had put a padlock and chain around the door. Inside the cage, a boy with dark brown hair lay unconscious in the fetal position. Given the size of the cage, it was probably the only way he could lie down.

“What is he?” Nita waited for her mother to list off the heinous things he did to survive. Maybe he ate newborn babies and was actually five hundred years old instead of the eighteen or nineteen he looked.

Her mother shrugged. “I don’t know if there’s a name for what he is.”

“But what kind of unnatural is he? Explain it.” Nita felt her voice rising and forced it to calm down. “I mean, you know what he does, right?”

Her mother laughed. “He doesn’t do much of anything. He’s an unnatural, that much I’m sure of, but I don’t think you’ll find any external signs of it. He was being kept by a col- lector in Buenos Aires.”

“So . . . why do we want him?” Nita pushed, surprised at how much she needed an answer, a reason to justify the cage in her room and the small, curled-up form of the boy. His jeans and T-shirt looked like they were spattered with something, and Nita wondered if it was blood.

“Ah. Well, he’s supposedly quite delicious, you know. Something about him. That collector had been selling vials of his blood — vials, not bags, mind you — for nearly ten thousand each. US dollars, not soles or pesos. Dollars. One of his toes went up for auction online last year, and the price was six dig- its. For a toe.”

Her mother had a wide, toothy grin, and her eyes were alight at the prospect of how much money an entire body could make. Nita wondered how soon the boy’s time would be up. Her mother preferred cash in hand to cash in the future, so Nita doubted the boy would be prisoner for long.

“I already put him up online, and we have a buyer for another toe. So I took the liberty of cutting it off and mailing it while we were in Argentina.”

It took a few moments for Nita to register her mother’s words. Then she looked down, and sure enough, the boy’s feet were bare and bloody. One foot had been hastily wrapped in bandages, but they’d turned red as the blood soaked through.

Her mother tapped her finger to her chin. “The only problem is, his pieces need to be fresh — well, as fresh as we can get them. So we’ll sell all the extremities first, as they’re ordered. He should be able to survive without those, and we can bottle the blood when we remove them and sell it as well. We’ll do the internal organs and such later, once we’ve spread the word. Shouldn’t take too long.”

Nita’s mind spun in circles, not quite processing what her mother was saying. “You want to keep him here and cut pieces off him while he’s still alive?”

“Exactly.”

Nita didn’t even know what to say to that. She didn’t deal with live people. Her subjects were dead.

“He’s not . . . dangerous?” Nita asked, unable to tear her eyes off the bandages around the missing toes.

Her mother snorted. “Hardly. He got unlucky in the genetic draw. As far as I can tell, everyone wants to eat him, and he has no more defenses than an ordinary human.”

The boy stirred in the cage and tried to twist himself around to look at them. Nita’s heart clenched. It was pathetic.

Her mother clapped her on the shoulder before turning around. “We’re going to make good money off him.”

Nita nodded, eyes never straying from the cage. Her mother left the room, calling for Nita to help her organize the crates in the kitchen so they could start packing the zannie parts.

The boy lifted his head and met Nita’s eyes. His eyes were gray-blue and wide with fear. He reached a hand up, but it stopped short, the handcuffs pulling it back down toward the bottom of the cage.

He swallowed, eyes never leaving Nita’s. “Ayúdame,” he whispered.

Help me.

TWO

Nita was not a heartless, murdering, body-part thief.

That was her mother.

Nita had never killed anyone. Her plan was to keep it that way.

Why couldn’t Mom have killed him before she came back? If she’d killed him before coming home, Nita wouldn’t have had to see him like this. She could have just pretended he died naturally. Or blamed her mother and chalked it up to another of those well, too late to do anything now cases. But now he was alive, and in her apartment, and she actually had to think about this.

About the living, breathing person her mother planned to kill.

And have Nita dissect. Alive.

What would it be like to cut someone up while they were screaming at you to stop?

“Nita?” Mom came around the corner from the kitchen, and Nita realized she’d been standing in the hall staring off into space for the past few minutes. “Something wrong?”

Nita hesitated. “He’s alive.”

“Yes. And?” Mom’s eyes were as tight as her voice. Nita had a sudden feeling she was treading on very dangerous ground.

“He talks.” She shifted her shoulders in unease, more so from her mother’s look than anything else.

Her mother’s face relaxed. “Oh, don’t worry about that, sweetheart. He won’t be around for long. He’ll be on your table shortly, and no one talks back to you there, do they?”

Nita nodded, appreciating her mother’s efforts to quell her anxiety even as her nausea rose. “Yeah.”

Her mother gave her an appraising look. “You know, if you want, I can go cut his tongue out now. I have some pliers — I can pull it right out. Then you won’t have to worry about him talking.”

“That’s okay, Mom.” Nita forced a smile. “I’m fine.”

“If you’re sure . . .” Her mother gave her another searching look before sighing. “All right. Shall we start packing some of those zannie parts?”

Nita nodded, glad for the change in subject.

They spent the rest of the afternoon filling up crates. Her mother had arranged the bribes to get them back to the family warehouse in the States. Her father would handle them from there. He dealt with the online sales, storage, and shipping of the body parts, while her mother dealt with the retrieval. Her father was also their major cover, if INHUP ever came sniffing. Nita was sure her mother had a record a mile long — her stack of foreign passports, driver’s licenses, and credit cards was probably two feet high. That sort of thing usually came with a record, in Nita’s opinion.

Her father, though, was squeaky clean as far as Nita knew.

By day, he worked as a legal consultant in Chicago, and by night, he sold body parts on the internet. Nita missed him, and their home, and their shitty Chicago suburb that was actually a two-hour drive from Chicago. She hadn’t been home since she was fourteen.

She wondered what her father would say about this situation. Would he be unhappy her mother had brought a live unnatural home? And moreover, a harmless one?

It  was  one  thing  when her  mother  dumped  a  zannie or a unicorn  on Nita’s  table.  For one,  they  were monsters  who couldn’t continue to live without killing other people. And the world agreed — that was why there was a Dangerous Unnaturals List. It wasn’t even a crime to kill them. You were saving lives.

But someone like the boy in the other room? How could she justify that?

Sighing, Nita wiped the sweat off her forehead as they closed another crate. No matter how she thought about it, she couldn’t find a way to justify murdering that boy.

Well, except money.

“It looks like we’re going to need a few more shipping crates.” Her mother ran a hand through her hair. Her manicure caught the light, black and red and yellow, like someone had tried to cover a fire with a blackout curtain.

Nita poured a glass of juice. “Probably.”

“I think we deserve pizza now. How about you?” Nita heartily agreed.

After dinner, they realized they were low on bottled water.

Tap water wasn’t drinkable unless boiled, and Nita’s mother didn’t like the taste. She’d been promising they were going to get a UV light for purifying water since they arrived a few weeks ago, but it hadn’t happened yet.

Her mother sighed and got up, dusting pizza crumbs off her lap. “I’ll go down to the store and get a seven-liter bottle. I’ll start on the boy when I come back.”

“Start what?”

Her mother grinned. “I sold his ear an hour ago.” Nita stiffened. “You’re going to cut it off tonight?” “Of course.”

Nita swallowed, looking away. “But you can’t mail it until tomorrow morning. It makes more sense to cut it off tomorrow. If freshness is important, like you said.”

Her mother’s eyes narrowed. Nita tried to resist the urge to shift in place, but failed.

Finally, in a small voice, Nita whispered, “I don’t want to hear him screaming all night. I won’t get any sleep.”

Her mother laughed, throwing her head back, then came over and clapped Nita on the back. It was just a little harder than it should have been, and Nita stumbled forward a step.

“You’re absolutely right, Anita.” Her mother grinned as she walked back to the door. “We’ll do it tomorrow morning.”

Nita stood there, trembling, as the door closed with a thud and a click. She remained in place for a few minutes, calming her breathing before picking up a slice of pizza and walking back to the dissection room.

When  she opened  the  door, she  found  the  boy sitting cross-legged in the cage, watching her. She approached with caution, and as she got closer, she was able to discern that yes, those stains on his clothes were definitely dried blood.

She put the pizza close enough to the bars that he could wiggle his fingers through and pull pieces off. She skittered back, afraid if she got too close he would leap at her. Not that he could do much, chained to the cage, which was chained to the wall. But she was careful anyway.

He looked down at the pizza and licked his lips. “Gracias.” “De nada.” Nita was surprised at how hoarse her voice was. She stood there for a long moment, awkward, not sure

what to do next. Logically, she knew better than to talk to him. She didn’t want to know anything about him if — when — she had to dissect him. But she also felt weird just giving him food and leaving.

This was the part where she could really have used more social skills practice. Was there etiquette for this kind of situation?

Probably not.

He wormed his fingers through the bars and ripped off the tip of the pizza. His hands wouldn’t reach to his mouth because of the handcuffs, so he had to bend his head over to eat. He chewed slowly, and after one bite, just sat, looking at the pizza but not eating. She wondered if he didn’t like pep- peroni.

“Cómo te llamas?” he asked, still not looking up. His accent was clearly Argentinian, his y sounds blurring into sh, so it sounded like “cómo te shamas?”

His accent wasn’t too hard to understand, unlike Nita’s.

Her father was from Chile, and she’d lived in Madrid until she was six, so Nita’s Spanish was a hopeless tangle of the two accents. Sometimes the Peruvians in the grocery store couldn’t understand her at all.

“Nita.” She hesitated. “Y tu?”

“Fabricio.” His voice was soft. “Fabricio Tácunan.” “Fabricio?” Nita couldn’t keep the incredulity out of her

voice. “Is that from Shakespeare or something?”

He looked up at her then, and frowned. “Pardon?”

Nita repeated slowly, trying to make her accent less pro- nounced.

This time he understood. He raised his eyebrows, voice pitched slightly differently. More curious, less sad, his Spanish soft and barely audible. “Who is Shakespeare?”

“Umm.” Nita paused. Did they teach Shakespeare in Latin American schools? If the boy — don’t think of him by name, you’ll get too attached and then where will you be? — had been a captive of a collector, had he even gone to school? “He’s an English writer from the fifteen hundreds. One of his characters was named Fabrizio, I think. It’s . . . I guess I thought it was kinda an old name.”

He shrugged. “I don’t know. I think it’s fairly common where I’m from. One of my father’s employees has the same name. But he spells it with a z, Fabrizio. The Italian way.”

Fabricio looked down at his shirt, crusted with dried blood and swallowed. “He spelled it with a z.”

Oh.

Nope, too much information. Nita didn’t want to hear about this.

Why did you even talk to him, then? she scolded herself. This was going to make everything worse later.

Nita turned to leave, but he called her back. “Nita.”

She paused, wavering, before glancing over her shoulder at him. “Yes?”

“What’s going to happen to me?”

She watched how he strained against the handcuffs, leaning forward in the cage. His face was tense, fear shining through in the angle of his head, the crease on his forehead, and the wide blue eyes.

She turned away. “I don’t know.”

But that was a lie. She just didn’t want to admit it to him.

  THREE

Heading back into the kitchen, Nita found her mother waiting for her.

There was no water.

Nita paused when she entered the room, uncomfortable. Her mother was watching her with cold eyes, hand resting near her gun. Casually, not on purpose. Not that her mother had ever needed a gun. She preferred poison.

“You weren’t talking with him, were you, Nita?”

Nita shook her head, looking at the floor. Her shoulders hunched as her body instinctively tried to curl into itself. Nita’s mother had an aura around her, an unspoken sense of coiled menace when she was angry. Nita would never admit it to either of her parents, but she was secretly terrified of her mother. She’d only stood up to her once in her life.

When Nita was twelve and they’d been living and operating near Chicago, her mother had tried to get into the dact fur business. Dacts, small fluffy balls of adorableness people kept as pets, were totally harmless. Her mother would come home with groups of them in cages, never saying where they were from. And every night, after her parents went to bed, Nita would sneak down to the basement and take the cages to the twenty-four-hour emergency vet clinic and ask them to give the dacts to the SPCA or shelter. A few times they’d scanned the dacts for microchips and found they’d been stolen from someone’s backyard.

Nita’s mother had not been impressed. She’d come home one day with a cage of dead dacts instead of live ones, and Nita had responded by flushing five pounds of pure powdered uni- corn bone down the toilet (that stuff sold better than cocaine and was more addictive by far). She took the dead dacts’ bodies to the emergency vet clinic anyway.

Nita’s mother hadn’t appreciated Nita’s discovery of morals. After her father calmed everyone down and ended the plan to sell dact fur, Nita’s mother still hadn’t been satisfied. So she’d poisoned the dact food in the pet store, and every single dact in their suburb had died. Her mother, knowing Nita’s pro-pensity for ignoring things that weren’t right in front of her nose, took to putting the corpses in Nita’s bed for a week.

It had only  ended when  Nita broke  down crying  on the front step, begging her mother to stop. Her father had agreed and told her mother  it was affecting their  profit margin — by that time Nita was dissecting most of the bodies coming through, and she was such an emotional wreck she hadn’t worked in a week. Money convinced her mother to stop when nothing else had.

But there was an unspoken promise: if Nita ever disobeyed her mother again, the punishment would be far, far worse.

Nita swallowed and tried to push away the memories. “Why would I talk to him? What would I even talk about?”

“Of course you weren’t talking to him, you’re socially incompetent.” Her mother took a step forward, and Nita nearly flinched. She kept herself in check. Barely. “Because, if you were trying to talk to the boy, you might develop sympathy. I don’t need that. And I can promise you” — a sharp, mean smile— “you don’t want that.”

Nita shrugged, trying to play it nonchalant when every nerve screamed at her to run, run far and fast and never ever look back. “I gave him his food. He said thanks. I said you’re welcome. Then I left.”

Her mother gave Nita a long, searching look before bestowing a condescending smile on her. “That’s good. It’s always appropriate to be polite.”

Nita tried to force a smile, but it wouldn’t come. “I’m tired. I kinda want to go to bed. If you don’t mind?”

Her mother waved her away. “After you pick up some water. I decided I didn’t want to go myself after all.”

So her mother didn’t trust her. She’d just sat there, eaves- dropping, and knew Nita had lied to her.

Great. “Okay.”

It was always best to obey her mother.

Nita grabbed her sweater and a bag on her way out, making sure to lock the door behind her. She took a deep breath, leaning her head on the door and closing her eyes. She felt like she was walking a tightrope. One wrong step, and she could fall to either side. The problem was, she wasn’t sure what exactly she’d be falling into, except that it would be bad.

Would her mother kill Fabricio while she was out so Nita couldn’t interfere?

No. Of course not. But she might start cutting off pieces. Nita swallowed, hands clenched at her side. Would that be

so terrible? It wouldn’t be Nita’s fault then — she wouldn’t be here; she couldn’t do anything about it. She could just brush it aside.

But she’d still have to dissect him when it was all over. Scoop out those scared blue eyes and put them in a jar.

Nita let out the breath she’d been holding. It would be a waste to start cutting pieces off Fabricio now.

She walked down the hall and to the stairwell, heading for the store.

Outside, it was dark and hazy, but the streetlights kept things moderately well lit. Nita lived in a nice part of Lima, right in the heart of Miraflores district, and she wasn’t too concerned about safety at night.

The heat of the evening settled comfortably on her skin, and a gentle breeze brought her the scent of something spicy in a nearby restaurant. She’d only been in Lima a month, but she liked it a lot so far. It was one of the nicer places they’d set up shop.

Nita and her mother moved around a lot. They would move to a central location on a continent, and her mother would tar- get all the nearby countries, hunting for unnaturals she could kill and sell. They’d spent years doing this in the US before they’d moved on to Vietnam, Germany, and now Peru.

She passed by the open door of a restaurant and saw a pair of American tourists snapping at a waiter. The woman was snarling something in English, and the waiter just stared at her, smile frozen on his face while shaking his head and try- ing to tell her, in a mix of broken English and Spanish, that he didn’t understand.

“Well, find me someone who does!” snapped the woman, and then she turned to her husband. “You’d think they could hire people that speak English.”

Nita rolled her eyes as she passed. Why was there this obsession Americans had that others should learn their language to accommodate them? They were in Peru. Why didn’t those American people learn Spanish?

She saw it everywhere, the weird entitlement. Tourists who stole pieces of pottery and coins from German castles because they could. Rich men who flew in to Ho Chi Minh thinking they could buy anyone they wanted for a night and do anything they wanted to them, laws of the country be damned.

Nita kept walking past the restaurant and down the street. Her footsteps slowed just beneath a plaque commemorating a battle against the Spanish. She thought about the Spanish conquistadores five hundred years before, who’d swept through South America and painted the whole continent red in their hunt for gold.

Something uncomfortable and squiggly shifted in her chest. The plaque was talking about Pizarro, the man who’d carved a bloody swathe through Peru. He’d taken the Inca — the  ruler of  the  Incan  people — hostage, and  then  ransomed him for a room full of gold. When the Incan people gave him the gold, he killed the Inca anyway.

Pizarro wasn’t even the worst of the conquistadores. Christopher Columbus used to cut the hands off indigenous people who didn’t dig enough gold for him each month.

Like her mother cut off Fabricio’s toes. Nope.

Nita really didn’t want to think about that.

So she ignored the niggling little voice that told her she had no right to claim the tourists were being entitled jerks when her mother felt entitled to take these people’s lives and sell their body parts for profit.

She went to the local bodega instead of the giant grocery store. She didn’t like how crowded the grocery store was. People were always talking to her and breathing near her, and some- times they brushed by her, and she found it uncomfortable.

The bodega was smaller, and she actually had to talk to the person at the cashier sometimes, but it was worth it to not feel the press of so many bodies around her. Also, the bodega never had a line.

As she was paying, Nita’s eyes were drawn to the television sitting on a chair on the other side of the room, a stack of toilet paper and Kleenex packages on top. It was an old, boxy unit, and someone had put on the news.

“The debate over whether to add unicorns to the Dangerous Unnaturals List continues, as INHUP starts its third day of discussions over the proposal.”

Nita smiled as a memory surfaced, one of the few she had where she really felt her mother cared. A man with blond hair and swirly black thorn tattoos had reached to ruffle her hair at a store, and her mother had nearly shot him right then and there. Nita had been swept away before the man could get too close, and while her mother never said, Nita knew that particular soul-eating unicorn was dead now. He would never again target virgins. She’d seen the new powdered unicorn bone stock.

Letting out a breath, Nita shook her head. Her mother might be many things, but she loved Nita. It was a scary kind of love, but it was there. That was important. Sometimes it was easy to forget, given her mother’s suspicious nature and obsession with money.

A reporter was interviewing a scientist about unnatural genetics.

“Unicorns are another type of unnatural linked to reces- sive genes. This means these creatures can reproduce with humans, and the genetic makeup can lie dormant for generations before the right circumstances combine and two per- fectly normal parents give birth to a monster.

“It’s not only unicornism that’s hereditary,” the man on the screen ranted. “But other creatures. Zannies. Kappa. Ghouls. Even vampires, to some extent.”

Nita thought of the pieces of zannie in her apartment. She wondered how many people it had tortured in its life to feed its hunger for pain. It was a good thought, because she had no guilt about cutting up a monster like that, and even admired her mother for killing it.

“Could you describe the proposal you’ve submitted to INHUP, Dr. Rodón?”

“Genetic manipulation. It’s a very select series of genes unique to each species, so once fully mapped, it should be easy to screen for and eliminate them. If we catch it before they’re born, we can eradicate all dangerous human-born unnatu- rals.”

The clerk gave Nita her water with a smile, and she nearly ripped it out of his hand as she stormed out of the shop, unable to listen to another minute of that drivel.

Nita hated people.

While Nita agreed it might be an effective, even humane way to reduce the monster population, she knew people would take it too far. People always took it too far. How long before people started isolating genes from harmless unnaturals and eliminating them too? Aurs, who were just bioluminescent people? Or mermaids? Or whatever Fabricio was?

Or even Nita and her mother?

FOUR

The next morning, Nita woke to screaming.

She yanked the covers off and reached for the scalpel she kept on her nightstand. Her feet tangled in the sheets as she stumbled out of bed and fell on her knees with a thud.

The screaming rose in pitch, sharpening into a long, horrible shriek.

Breathing fast, Nita freed herself and climbed to her feet. She crept out of her room, scalpel first, toward the source of the noise. The screams were punctuated by the rattle of metal against metal, the scraping squeak of something heavy on the linoleum floor, and her mother’s vicious swearing. Nita’s heartbeat stuttered.

Her mother hadn’t been testing her when she mentioned cutting off Fabricio’s ear. She was actually doing it. Right now.

Nita opened the door to the dissection room and saw blood. It had spattered her clean white walls and floor. Droplets clung to her mother’s angry face, and streaks of red tears patterned Fabricio’s cheeks. He’d scooted his head as far into the cage as he could and had bunched his legs so his feet were pressed to the front of the cage. He rocked it from side to side, trying to prevent her mother from getting a grip. The padlock was on the floor, but the cage door had swung shut, and Fabricio was holding it closed by wrapping his remaining toes around the door and tugging.

Her mother was holding a syringe, probably something to sedate Fabricio. He knocked it out of her hand with his shoulder, and it clattered to the bottom of the cage. He used an elbow to smash it, spilling the contents and chunks of broken glass across the ground.

Both of them turned as Nita entered, and Nita flinched when she saw Fabricio’s face straight on. Her mother had clearly tried to cut off his ear while he slept, and he’d woken up mid cut. His ear had been partly severed, and then the knife had slipped, slicing a deep red line across his cheek.

Nita took an involuntary step forward to stop this, to do something. Her mouth opened to protest. Then it closed.

You can’t stop this, Nita. You can’t save him.

If you show sympathy, your mother will make sure you regret it. She wouldn’t hurt me, Nita protested. But that didn’t mean

there weren’t worse things her mother could do. The memory of small broken bodies stuffed between her sheets surfaced, but she shoved it away.

She let her hands fall to her sides as she talked herself out of action and looked away. She was no stranger to blood and carnage, but she hated that shard of hope shining from Fabricio’s eyes. She didn’t want to see it replaced by betrayal.

“Nita.” Her mother rose, flicking blood off her fingers. “Good morning.”

“Good morning.” Nita paused. “Are you trying to get the ear?”

“Yes. He’s not cooperating.” Her mother beckoned her. “Give me a hand.”

Nita hesitated only a split second before approaching. “How can I help?”

The hope in Fabricio’s eyes cracked, and then melted into terror and anger. Nita tried not to look.

Her mother took out another syringe, presumably full of sedatives. “I’m going to try and hold him still. I want you to sedate him.”

Nita took the syringe with trembling fingers, not letting herself look at Fabricio. It was better this way, wasn’t it? This way he wouldn’t feel the pain when his ear came off.

Nita wouldn’t have to hear him scream.

“Why didn’t you sedate him before you started?” Nita asked, hiding her shaking hand from her mother.

Her mother shrugged, nonchalant. “I thought I could cut it off fast enough.”

No, Nita realized, looking at the half smile twitching across her mother’s face. You thought no such thing. You wanted this to hap- pen, so I would wake up and be forced to help you.

Nita was being tested. She didn’t know what the conse- quences of failure were, but she knew they weren’t good.

You shouldn’t have talked to Fabricio and then lied about it to her. Nita had been stupid. She should have known better. Clenching her jaw, she put the syringe down. “I don’t see how it’ll be any easier to sedate him than it would be to just get the rest of the ear off.” She showed her mother her scalpel.

“There’s only a strip of flesh left. It won’t take much to finish the job.”

Her mother’s smile widened until it seemed to consume her face. “If you think so, I’m happy to try.”

“Nita.” Fabricio spoke for the first time. “Nita, por favor.” Nita’s mother laughed. “Oh, it figured out your name.” Nita clenched the scalpel in her sweaty palm and focused

on the ear, ignoring Fabricio’s crying and continued whispers of her name like a prayer.

Just get this over with. Then she could figure out where to go from there. But if she failed this, bad things would happen. She didn’t want a repeat of the dact incident with parts of Fabricio in her bed each morning.

She tried not to look at his face as she pushed the scalpel through the cage bars, but she couldn’t escape his sobs and cries. Her hand was shaking, and her palm was so sweaty that when Fabricio shook the cage again, the scalpel was knocked right out of Nita’s fingers, leaving a deep, bloody gash across her palm along the way.

Nita yanked her hand back, swearing as the blood dripped down her arm.

Her mother gave her a tired look. “Well, heal it already, and we’ll try again.”

Nita turned away so her mother wouldn’t see the flash of anger in her expression. Then she let out a breath and focused her body. She increased blood clotting factor in the affected area to speed up the scabbing process. She didn’t want to do too much repairing until she had some disinfectant, though— while she could stimulate her body’s natural defenses against the microbes, it was just easier to wash the wound in soap.

Nita wasn’t sure how old she’d been when she discovered that other people couldn’t control their bodies the same way she could. Her mother did it all the time — enhanced her own muscles so she could run faster, hit harder, heal quicker.

The more Nita understood about her body, the more she could control it. But it was dangerous — there was a reason for swelling, and if you took away the symptom without dealing with the underlying cause, it could make things worse. She’d discovered that the hard way when she was seven  and  her father had to take her to a hospital because she’d accidentally paralyzed herself trying to make her bicycle-butt bruise go away. Only after the x-rays and scans, and the doctor’s detailed explanation of the precise issue, had Nita been able to fix it.

After that, she’d been very cautious about how she altered herself.

“Are you done yet?” Her mother’s voice was cold.

Nita nodded and turned back to her mother. “For now. But it’ll take time to fully heal. I severed a tendon — I don’t think I’ll be able to hold a scalpel for a day or so.”

Her mother scowled, clearly displeased. Nita made no comment and kept her face blank. It wouldn’t do for her mother to see how relieved this injury made Nita feel, or for her mother to realize she was stalling and could, if she wanted, finish healing the wound much sooner than tomorrow. Now she had at least a day where she didn’t personally have to do the slicing. That was something.

“Fine.” Her mother picked up the bloody scalpel, gave it a quick rinse in the sink, and then, before either Nita or Fabricio had a chance to react, spun with near superhuman speed and threw it. It neatly sliced through the last piece of cartilage connecting Fabricio’s ear to his body, and he screamed as the sev-ered piece of flesh tumbled to the ground. He tried to clap his hands over his ear, but they were still chained to the bottom of the cage, and he couldn’t reach. Instead, he wept as blood coated the side of his face.

Her mother scooped up the scalpel and speared the ear like a piece of steak. She showed it to Nita with a grin. “You know, I think my aim could have been better.”

Nita resisted the urge to throw up.

 ***

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[fen--harel]

do you have any other ocs besides alaina?

WHO IS THIS ?!??!!?!! YES ??!!!!! BLESS I HOPE YOU’RE READY FOR ME TO SPOUT OUT USELESS STUFF ABOUT MY OCS !!! ♥

So Alaina’s from my original story that has no official name so i’ve affectionately been calling it Alaina & Friends

So the whole premise is about Alaina and her time in the Demonio Famiglia mafia (I HAVE FOUR ARCS FOR THIS). It’s a lot but here’s basic info on my main ocs:

Demonio Famiglia

Stephane Sinclair (The Boss)Age: 31Birthday: December 31stPhysical Description: 6’3, light almost platinum blond hair that's usually half slicked back, leaving some of his hair to act like a fringe over his left eye turquoise eyes, medium skin, medium buildBasic Description: Stephane is the charismatic and suave mafia boss that pretty much every wishes they could be. He’s acts cocky 24/7 like he’s the coolest shit and he’s super snobby and only like things that are fancy, expensive, and high quality. The mansion they all live in doubles as the main base of operations and also their house, but you’ll never find Stephane dead in anything else but his armani and hugo boss suits unless he’s in his room. For the most part he’s calm and arrogant unless he hears something about his twin brother Cesaire who he hates w the intensity of 1000 suns because Cesaire was the favorite child when they were younger. When it was time for Cesaire to take over the Demonio Famiglia, Cesaire bailed and started his own family, the Angelo Famiglia. Despite Cesaire leaving, their father STILL didn’t want Stephane to take over so with the help of his best friend Erasmus he killed his father and took over as the head of the Demonio Famiglia. What I love most about Stephane is that he acts like he’s the toughest shit and that he’s uncaring and smooth but honestly he’s a big fucking baby. He hides the fact that he has the biggest sweet tooth in the world and how much he’s in love w Alaina. (THEY’RE MY OTP). 

Asiel Renato Celio Manoel Xenos (Assassination Captain)Age: 27Birthday: October 5thPhysical Description: 5'9, tanned skin, burgundy long hair that’s slicked back with shaved sides, golden eyesBasic Description: I honestly don’t know where to begin when it comes to Asiel. Recently, I’ve watched Deadpool for the first time and he’s the closest description to Asiel I can get. (Honestly, if you wanna get a better description about asiel just go through his tag). Asiel is just a big fucking joke he makes lewd jokes all the time, only thinks about sex, food comic books, video games, anime, and alcohol, and makes the most awful puns. He’s the BIGGEST fucking flirt ever - no one is safe from that man. He’s Alaina’s best friend and those two do EVERYTHING and he’s basically her bad influence. My favorite thing about Asiel though is the fact that he has this cheerful, funny, friendly, stupid outer appearance but inside he’s like a fucking demon. He’s extremely smart and cunning and he’s basically fake af and he uses it to his advantage because everyone just thinks that he’s a dumb pervert but in reality he’s like “Hi :D” to ur face but inside his head he’s literally dismantling you with insults. 

Erasmus Desiderius Mavros (Information Captain / Right Hand Man)Age: 30Birthday: March 18Physical Description: 6’0, medium skin, slicked back black hair, grey/brownish eyesBasic Description: Erasmus is a big fucking cry baby nerd. I rarely talk about him but I love him so much. He��s Stephane’s best friend - the two met in high school and for most of Erasmus’ life he’s been super shy and weak and he was often bullied in school. Stephane saved his ass once and in return for working for him, Stephane taught Erasmus how to defend himself. Since then Erasmus acts like he has a huge stick up his ass - he always yells at people to get to work, he’s always super grouchy and mean, and there’s rarely a time where insults don’t come out of his mouth. However, a lot of original Erasmus is still inside of him. There’s times where he’ll slip up and you’ll catch him stuttering or blushing and as a 30 yr old man he’s only had sex once (not there’s anything wrong w that !) and can barely hold hands. 

Angelo Famiglia

Cesaire Sinclair (The Boss)Everything is literally the same as Stephane’s except for the fact that he has waist long hair.Basic Info: Cesaire is kinda like Asiel where he’s super fake and happy and charismatic and charming but inside he’s an asshole but not as much of an assshole ?? Like Cesaire’s purely fake so he can get what he wants and Asiel’s fake because he literally hates everyone and knows he can’t get by easily in life if he acts how he wants to. Cesaire is often more loved than Stephane because he’s friendlier and more animated than his younger twin brother. Cesaire also loves musicals, hates vegetables, and believes in zodiac signs - (LIKE DEEPLY LIKE THIS BITCH IS LIKE ‘U ACT LIKE THAT BC UR A LEO’). 

Divina Commedia 

Kal “Asmodeus” Lodge (The Boss)Age: 29Birthday: February 14Physical Description: 5′11, slicked back black hair, bright blue eyes, light skin, medium build Basic Description: Kal is one of my newer OCs but honestly has become one of my faves because he’s literally me taking my love for villains to the next level. As you can see p much all my OCs (except Alaina) are terrible villain assholes but usually they have some redeeming quality - WELL KAL DOESN’T LOL he’s the head of a gang called Divina Commedia and they basically do what the mafia does but as competition. Kal is a psychopath that gets off on killing and torturing ppl and that’s p much why he created the gang. He’s the main antagonist of the 3rd arc and he’s the reason why Stephane loses an eye and Alaina loses most of her hair. He’s fucking insane (in the membrane). He acts super calm and cheerful even when he’s stabbing you in the back (literally). No one is safe from Kal. Literally no one. His best friend, Hiram, whom he has known forever, literally goes against his order ONCE and then Kal kills him for it. He don’t give a shit he’s Kal Lodge. And I fucking love him.

[lovelybones81]

Unthinkable -Updated 3/28

Summary: Seven years, three movies, two people, one story. But before they can get their happily ever after, Sebastian Stan and Camille Solis must learn to trust in each other and in themselves, before allowing the unthinkable to happen.

Warnings: Fluff, future smut, Language, Angst, mental health, WOC lead character

Rating: NC-17

NOTE: I come with a chapter! xoxo Again thank you for being so patient! This one comes with some angst!

Chapter 15   The Hard Stuff

 “Dude! Where the hell have you been?” Chace Crawford exclaimed, gently slapping Sebastian on the chest.

 Sebastian distractedly took a long drag from his cigarette. “Huh? What?” Blowing the smoke from one side of his mouth, his eyes wondering around the large outside terrace. “Have you seen Cass?” He asked, ignoring Chace question completely. “Or Camille?” 

 Chace gave his friend a curious look, but before having the chance to respond, a female voice interrupted. “Chace!” she whined. “I thought we were going to dance?” Sebastian frowned in annoyance at the voice.

 “Get us another round of drinks.” Chace ordered sweetly. “I’ll be right in.” The woman didn’t argue, just gave him a beaming smile, turning on her heels and making her way back inside. Once the admirer was out of sight, Chace turned back to Sebastian. “What happened to you?”

 At the same time Sebastian asked again. “Have you seen Cam?”

 Yes, Camille. That’s who he needed to talk to. He wasn’t sure what would come out of his mouth if he found Cassidy first. He was fuming. 

 “I saw Cass inside with-. “  Chace stopped as realization hit his face. “Oh.” His eyes widening. 

 “Yeah.” Sebastian muttered after taking another long puff. 

 “C’mon man, you know she didn’t mean any harm-“ 

 Sebastian glared. “She needs to learn how to stay out of people’s damn business.” Taking an angry puff off his cigarette. Camille, himself, Alyssa and Chace had an early dinner. Then met up with a few other mutual friends at a high-end bar/club Chace has suggested. He had been having a pleasant night until about twenty minutes ago. The night has been going pretty smooth, with drinks, dancing, laughing and flirting all around. He even gotten a nice buzz after a few beers, but it slowly began to fade when someone bumped into him at the bar. 

 His first thought was: Camille coming to join him after she had disappeared to the ladies room. But he had been mistaken. Sebastian hadn’t talked or seen his ex-girlfriend since the breakup. At first, it had been because of their busy work schedules, but eventually it was by Sebastian’s choice. As more time passed, a few things had begun to come to light about her unfaithfulness during their time together.

 “She must have put her up to this-. “  Chace said, trying to defend Cassidy. 

 “Yea well- she should have known better.” Sebastian growled, putting the beer bottle up to his mouth. Wanting desperately to get the alcohol buzz back. He knew drinking was not the answer, but it was the only thing he could control. Beer and a cigarette was all he needed at the moment-and talking to Camille. 

 “Camille did come out here with me...” Chace mumbled, looking around his surroundings with concern. “Wait-she was with Cassidy before you went to the bar. I thought she-“ 

 Chugging the last bit of his beer, he tossed the empty bottle in the trash can closest to him and snorted. “I think I would have noticed if she has been standing next to Leighton.” He might have reacted a bit nicer if Camille had been around. Instead all the anger, confusion and hurt had seeped out and he had been nothing but snippy with Leighton and Cassidy. And from the expression on Cassidy’s face, she had thought she was doing a service putting them together in the same room. But before Sebastian had the chance to say anything, she quickly disappeared with a lame excuse. Leaving him alone with his ex. 

 By then, people had started to gawk and Sebastian knew he would have to be the adult and walk away. He wasn’t as well-known as other actors but in the New York scene people knew who he was. And they especially knew about the relationship with Leighton. So he said his hello through gritted teeth, even giving her a quick hug before walking away. It had not been enough. She followed and cornered him, wanting an explanation on why he had been avoiding her phone calls. Before he even realized what was happening they had made their way into one of the VIP bathrooms, bickering and fighting. 

 It wasn’t his style. But something inside of him hated the fact that she had shown up at the same bar he was at. Because he knew it had not been a coincidence. She planned this.

 “Oh wait.” Chace started. “She got a phone call!” nodding vigorously at his revelation.  

 “Who?”

 “Camille!” He peeked over his shoulder. “So she’s out here somewhere.”

 Sebastian laughed despite his mood. “Thanks man.” Placing a hand on top of Chace’s shoulder. “Did you see which way she went?”

 “Toward the other side of the terrace…I think.”

 Glancing down at the watch Camille had given him for his birthday, he wondered who she was on the phone with. It was past midnight in New York, and even though it was 2 hours earlier in Los Angeles, he was pretty sure Tia Yolanda was already in bed. Which meant she was most likely on the phone with her sister.  

 He took a puff from his cigarette once more before speaking.  “I’ll find her.” 

 Chace nodded. “Cool.” Glancing eagerly over Sebastian’s shoulder into the inside of the bar. 

 Sebastian smirked. “Didn’t you send her to fetch drinks?” He teased.  

 Chace glared back at Sebastian. “Ha-ha.” He said sarcastically. “I’ll catch you later.” He must have spotted the female admirer inside because Sebastian didn’t even get a chance to say a word before Chace quickly disappeared back into the bar.

 Shaking his head, Sebastian turned on his heels in the opposite direction, in search of Camille. The outside terrace was bigger than he expected, for the next 15 minutes he walked virtually all the way around with no sight of her. He was about to give up and head back inside, but came to a halt- from the corner of his eye, he spotted her leaning into the rails of the terrace, half of her body turned to him, with one elbow slanted over the top of the rail, her head tilted to the other side. Sebastian’s eyes looked her up and down. Once again, flabbergasted of how strikingly beautiful she was- even if it was from the back side. Tonight she had chosen to wear a dark pencil skirt with a low back cream cami, outlining every single curve and strappy heels to match, her curls up, divulging her neck.

 Sebastian licked his lips sensually, putting the last bit of his cigarette out in the corner ashtray, forgetting for a split minute why he’d been looking for her in the first place. His thoughts couldn’t help but drift to whether or not she was wearing anything else underneath the skirt.

 But as quickly as the thought came to him, the faster he chastised himself for thinking it. Besides, checking her ass out was not the reason he had been looking for her.

 What he needed was his friend who would listen to him. For the last few weeks he had been trying not to burden her with his problems, but now realized he did need someone to talk to. Camille’s words from the night before resonating; about him being her best friend. He felt the same way. Camille was now part of his core of friends, one of his best friends. He wasn’t sure of where their relationship was going to lead or end up -if earlier conversation was any indication (it felt like a seesaw at times trying to guess who would pull who down first) but they were in each other lives now and Sebastian wouldn’t have it any other way.

 She was intently into her conversation she hadn’t notice him nearing closer. He stood a few feet away, his ears picking up on the phone call. 

 “Did you drive?” Camille asked in a troubled tone. There was a pause on the other end as she listened to whomever was speaking. She spoke again. “Okay- I mean is there any way you could have someone drive you home? Or pick you up? You shouldn’t be driving-.” She pleaded softly. The person on the other line must have been arguing because he heard Camille say: “Promise me you’ll get someone to take you home.” She urged. “Do you want me to call-. “ Getting interrupted again. 

 Sebastian watched her body language, one finger nervously playing with a few curls that had fallen from the top of her head. Sighing she spoke again. “I know you’re sorry-but we can-.“ But not able to finish her sentence, instead she let out an exasperated sound. “Why?” Another pause, as the voice on the other side of the line spoke. “Because you’ve had a lot to drink and you aren’t making any sense right now.” Camille’s voice sounding defeated as she straighten up, back still to Sebastian. 

 He wasn’t all the way sober, but the pieces slowly started to fit together on who she was on the phone with. And it made him clinch his jaw in annoyance. Wasn’t she avoiding his calls? Isn’t that what she had asked him to do earlier in the park? Hit the ignore button on her phone? Why hadn’t she done that again?

 “I know you wish it wouldn’t have happen.” Camille lamented. Sebastian knew he should not be eavesdropping, but couldn’t seem to move from his spot. “But it did. And I really don’t want to talk about this-.”  David must have interrupted because she was quiet for a few more seconds. “Right now you just need to find a way to get home.” 

 Sebastian felt his stomach tighten in anger, listening to her plead with him. And why the hell was David calling anyway? She was thousands of miles away, she couldn’t do anything from New York. Why couldn’t he just leave her alone? 

 “David-this isn’t the time.” Anxiously tugging on the curl wrapped around d her finger. “I-I don’t know when-but it’s not right now.” She stammered. “No I can’t come home.” Another long pause. “It’s not that-.“ Stomping her foot lightly on the ground beneath her. “Don’t!” Camille exclaimed in her best stern voice. 

 Sebastian had the sudden urge to take the phone from her and throw it over the terrace. Yet a part of him was annoyed with her as well. Why continue to torture herself? 

 “If you show up, you know Nat will not hesitate to call the police.” Camille warned. “And I can’t meet you. I’m not back in LA yet.” Letting out a dejected sigh, as if she knew the conversation was not going to lead anywhere new.

 She spoke again. “What? I’m not understanding.” David must’ve repeated himself because the next words out of Camille’s mouth were: “I’m not sure. Maybe in the next few days?” Slowly turning around so she rested against the terrace rail and at the same time tossed her head back. “No, not in Manchester.” Sebastian heard her murmur. He must’ve asked where she was, because she hesitated to answer. “Just promise me you’ll fine away to get home.” Trying to change the subject. “I can’t stay on the phone with you all night.” 

 Even though she no longer had her back to him, she still hadn’t notice him standing there. She was quiet for a few minutes, the phone still to her ear, listening. 

 “This is not how we should be having this conversation.” She started again. “Why have I been avoiding you? Because this hasn’t been easy for me and I needed to try and deal with it.” Another long pause. “Hold on I can’t hear you.” 

 Sebastian watched her take the phone away from her ear to tap the screen. 

 “I want us to work this out.” David’s voice came over the speaker phone. “I miss you.” His words slurring. 

 “Just get home.” Camille repeated. “Okay?” 

 “No!” David’s voice adamant. “Not until you say we will-will work this out. Not until you say you’ll talk to me when you get back here.” He pushed, and she shut her eyes, not saying a word. “Camille? Ille…” he pleaded.

 It didn’t take a rocket scientist to see the hurt in her as she listened to David plead with her. If he could only see what his actions were doing to her.

 “These last few weeks haven’t been easy.” She confessed. 

 “I know sweetheart. And it’s my fault.” David replied, his words still slurring. “I love you Camille. I-I love you.” 

 She rubbed a hand nervously over her face. “I know David.” 

 “Then let me p-prove it. Let’s talk okay? Please. I know you still love me. We’ve been together too long to just end things this way.” He was begging now, that was obvious. 

 Good. He didn’t deserve her. 

 Camille folded one arm across her chest bringing the other arm up with the phone up to her face, listening. Sebastian watched her quickly wipe a tear away. “I’m gonna get off the phone.” She managed to say. 

 “Wait-sweetheart-“ 

 She shook her head even if though he couldn’t see it. “No, no. I gotta go.” It was almost as if she was trying to convince herself. “You’ve obviously have had a lot to drink and I’m not exactly the most sober person right now... and answering was a mistake.” Taking in a shaky breath. 

 David wasn’t giving up so easily. Sebastian heard him quickly speak again. “Okay, okay-at least think about it? Please? Say you’ll think about seeing me when-when you get home?” 

 Camille wiped another tear from her face before answering. “If I do-will you head home right now? Have someone pick you up?” She tried to bargain. 

 “Yeah. Yes.” 

 “Okay-I’ll think about it.” 

 “Yeah?”

 “Yes.” Camille stated. 

 “Great!” David said too enthusiastically for Sebastian’s taste. “You know I love you right? I love you.” He repeated for what seemed the 100th time in the past 10 minutes.

 Sebastian watched Camille turn to lean into the terrace railing again. “I know.” Sebastian heard her say. “I...love you too.” 

 Sebastian ran his fingers through his hair, feeling like someone has just stung him in the chest, listening to Camille say those three little words to someone else. He knew he shouldn’t be listening. It wasn’t his business. Camille was a grown woman after all. Barely hearing Camille say goodbye to David, he turned on his heels, hoping she wouldn’t notice. 

 “Seb?” He heard her call out. 

 He stopped mid-step, jaw twitching, eyes shut. Well, so much for that idea. Slowly he turned back in her direction. She stood in the same spot, only this time facing him, her phone gripped tightly in her hand, a forced smile on her beautiful face. 

 “No wine?” She tried to tease making her way toward him. 

 “Huh?” 

 “I thought you went to the bar to get us drinks?” 

 “You disappeared on me, so it just seemed useless.” He said in an edgy tone, not sure where it was coming from. Camille must have noticed too because her eyes widen in surprise. 

 “What’s wrong?” She quickly asked, taking a closer step. 

 Sebastian shook his head, not meeting her gaze. “Nothing.” He lied. 

 Was she going to tell me him about David? Or just pretend like the conversation had just not happen? What the hell was wrong him?! Who was he to demand any explanation from her? But he couldn’t seem to control his emotions at the moment. He was annoyed and angry on how she handled the whole situation with David.

 “Liar.” Camille stated with a suspicious glare.

 Her response only infuriated him. So he snapped back. “Are you okay?” mirroring the same look she had given him.

 Tilting her head to one side, she broke the gaze for a split second, pressing her lips together before locking eyes again.  “I’m fine. What makes you think I’m not?” 

 So she was going to pretend as if the phone call hadn’t happen. “Just making an observation.” 

 Wrinkling her forehead. “Did I do something to upset you?” She asked cautiously 

 Was he upset? Fuck yes he was. His cheating ex-girlfriend had just cornered him, and he had just heard the girl he had feelings for confess her love to her cheating ex fiancé, so yes he was a little upset. And confused. And he needed another cigarette and beer to deal with this. Could he possibly be overacting? Yes. But his drunk ass was not listening to reason at the moment.  

 Shrugging nonchalantly he responded. “No. Why would I be?” 

 If he wasn’t irritated himself he would have been scared of the dirty look she was giving him. She shrugged and snipped back. “Just making an observation of my own.”  

 Sebastian wasn’t sure how long they stood there -just staring, but it was obvious they were both trying to figure out what the other one was thinking. He spoke up first. “We should probably get back inside with everyone else.” Pointing in the direction of the club. 

 Camille’s face soften, reaching out to touch his elbow. “Wait- Sebastian what’s going on?”

 He knew he could talk to Camille, that’s why he had been looking for her in the first place. But after hearing (fine, eavesdropping) on the conversation, he was hesitant to do so. It didn’t make sense, it was just how he was feeling at the moment. “Nothing.” He repeated, forcing a smile. “I just need another beer.” Patting his back pocket. “And maybe a cigarette…” he mumbled to himself. Where the hell did he leave his pack? Maybe his behavior was a bit petty, he just couldn’t help himself.  He patted his pants again. “Where the hell did I put them?” He mumbled to himself. He looked up in surprise when Camille handed him the pack. 

 “You asked me to hold on to them while you went to the bar.” She reminded with a small smile. 

 “Thanks.” He muttered. Shit, he had. That conversation felt like so long ago now. They had been flirting for most of the night. Getting closer and closer as they sat in the VIP area with the rest of his friends when he’d realized Camille’s glass was empty. So he offered to get them refills. 

 “Sure.” Camille answered, gripping tightly on to her phone. 

 Glancing down at her hands, Sebastian found himself asking. “Were you on the phone with someone?” He didn’t know why he had asked but a part of him wanted to know what her answer would be. 

 Camille looked anywhere but his face, licking her lips nervously with a shake of her head. “No.” She answered simply. “Just needed some air.” 

 He gave a small nod back, taking another cigarette out of the pack. Okay, so she wasn’t going to tell him about the phone call. Why did it bother him so much? Because for the last months they shared everything. Not sure of what else to say, he put the cigarette to his lips.  

 Camille took another step closer, facing him. Without warning she took it out of his mouth. “What happened?” 

 He glared, trying to grab it back from her. “What are you talking about?” 

 She tilted her head, narrowing her eyes. “Well, 20 minutes ago you were all happy and drunk and now you look like someone hurt your puppy.” She tried to joke.  

 He was getting tired of this conversation. What was the big deal? She didn’t need to know his mood change had to do with her and his ex. “You’re right- I’m upset.” He started. “I’m upset because I’m out of beer.” Trying his best to not sound cross with her, he forced a smile, but it quickly faded when he spotted Cassidy walking toward them. Camille opened her mouth to respond, but shut it when she saw the look on his face. She slowly turned her head, following his gaze. Cassidy stood a few feet away, nervously bouncing on the balls of her heels. He clinched his fists at the sight of her. He needed to control his anger. Or at least try.  

 Cassidy tugged a strand of blond hair behind her ear, slowly walking over to them.  “Sebastian, I’m so sorry.” She stated quickly. “I had no idea she was going to do that…“ Stammering the last part. 

 Sebastian couldn’t help but glare. “You know Cass -you should really learn how to stay out of peoples business.” He barked. 

 “Sebastian-. “  Camille warned. 

 But he wasn’t listening. He was angry. Why did everyone else think they knew more about his relationships than he did? Cassidy had been pushing for Leighton and him to reconcile for weeks now. “You knew exactly what would happen.” He accused. Camille watched the both of them, not sure of what was going on. Sebastian continued. “You just have to be the middle of everything...” 

 Cassidy eyes widen at the words. “I said I was-“ 

 Sebastian brought a hand up. “If I were you- I would keep quiet because nothing you say is going to change any of this.” He snapped. If he wasn’t so upset he would have felt a bit guilty at the way she looked right now. 

 “Sebastian-. “  He heard Camille repeat softly. “Maybe this can be talked over tomorrow?” She suggested. “When everyone is a bit more sober?” 

 Breaking the gaze from Cassidy, he looked back at Camille, his jaw twitching. “This really doesn’t concern you.” He blurted out.

 Camille raised both eyebrows, in confusion and hurt. But it quickly fade, the look in her eyes held anger as she narrowed them at him. Chewing on her lower lip she cleared her throat, taking a step back from him. “You’re right.” She said shortly. “I’m sorry.” Looking between them. “I’ll be inside…getting another drink.”

 Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Sebastian let out a large frustrated sigh. He hadn’t meant to make her feel alienated, he just didn’t know how to handle all these damn feelings at the moment. And he wasn’t thinking clearly. He watched her take two steps (leaving Cassidy standing there) before he quickly made his way to her, grabbing onto her elbow. “Camille, wait- I’m-I’m sorry-“  

 Camille glanced at him over her shoulder, eyes not showing any emotion. “It’s fine.” Trying to break free from his grip. “Let go.” She ordered through gritted teeth. Sebastian knew better than to argue. He dropped his hand and she gave him a grim smile. “Thank you.” And without another word, walked away from him.

@thewintersadie @its-daydreamer23 @mydragulesebastian @jhangelface0523

[chickenkooks]

the noisy neighbors [m]

❛❛i live in a house full of stupid men and their dirty underwear except there is an angel in their midst and he cleans up after himself and does everyone’s laundry and we share the same neighbor who likes to have wild sex every night and the hot boy hates confrontation but i guess not when his dick is in my vagina❜❜ AU

COUNT → 7.143

GENRE → smut 

PAIRING → jinyoung | reader

WARNINGS → dom and sub tones | oral sex | explicit language | penetration | graphic dirty talk | spanking 

note → this is for my friend @loljinyoungie because it’s her birthday today!!!! birthday smut!!!! so if ur reading this. please feel free to send her a birthday message :-D i hope u like this smut though!!!!! i told you i would finish it!!!!!!!!! a little later than i planned but oH WELL HAVE AT ALL YOUR KINKS I HOPE I DID THEM JUSTICE. AND IF I SPELLED HIS NAME “JIMYOUNG” ANYWHERE IM GONNA BE SO MAD IDK WHY THAT IS EVEN A THING THAT HAPPENS

You really hated the fact that you were such a light sleeper.

One of your favorite sounds in the world was nothing. That's not to say you didn't have a favorite sound, but that your favorite sound was literally nothing. Nothing was the sound of a cool breeze blowing against your house's exterior. Or maybe it was even the sound of rain dripping from your roof outside your window—sounds like those.

Nothing was white noise, but it also sounded cooler to say nothing rather than that.

However, the sound of bodies thudding into the wall next to you? That was definitely not white noise.

Your walls were thin. And it just so happened that the wall your bed was propped against was the same wall that your viagra housemate liked to frequent with his dick rammed in something—usually some girl's poor vagina. And it was never her who was loud, always him. He moaned and cursed and grunted very violently that sometimes you worried for her safety—or all of their safety if it was more than one girl. Still, this happened every single night.

It was like he had to have his dick in something every day that you kind of worried about him, too.

And it was never at the same time either. Sometimes, he liked to start the day off with his dick sucked. You know, that's reasonable because once you were asleep, you were fucking asleep and not even his low grunts could wake your slumber. It was like you were a vampire or something, except you did enjoy garlic bread from time to time.

Why don't you just move your bed?

A good question.

Though, why the fuck should you have to take the time out of your day to move around your prehistoric mattress and bedframe just so that you could fucking go to sleep? You were stubborn—you could admit that. He should have the good human fucking decency to not fucking wake up the entire house with his weird sex noises.

Or maybe you hadn't gotten laid for a long time and this was something that made you bitter.

Maybe you were bitter. He was getting laid every fucking night and there you were watching Veggie Tales while eating a salad because... cannibalism. That could be it but you also weren't the only person in your house who hated him. In fact, your other housemate on the opposite side of his room was actually just as peeved as you.

Jinyoung was his name.

Except Jinyoung didn't like to complain.

When you met him—and everyone else living in the house—he was the one who kept to himself. He made polite conversation and listened when you complained that hail was an abomination to weather, but he never really volunteered any complaints of his own. Maybe he didn't like you and thought you were a freak for hating hail when you could be spending your time doing something productive, but then he asked to use your toaster oven the day after because his broke. And that's what got you talking—not every day, though. Jinyoung wasn't home often—he worked in some office downtown. In fact, Jinyoung was hardly ever home at a reasonable time either.

But he always came back just when the guy sandwiched between your rooms started getting jiggy with it.

That was a reference that he was fucking someone without having to say that.

Sitting straight up in bed, your feet eased into your slippers beside your bedside table, storming out your bedroom door and into the main upstairs hallway so you could make him shut up already. This wasn't the first time you'd done this and it sure as fuck wouldn't be the last; he just never got the message. You would say, "Kindly shut up, you insignificant pest," and he would say, "Sure thing, Cantaloupe. Sorry about all the noise. I'll be quiet."

Cantaloupe wasn't even your fucking name—or a name at all—so you had no idea where he got that from.

It was like his fucking ears were made out of cantaloupes.

You squinted as you closed your door and listened with a twitching eyebrow as you could hear his headboard slamming against the wall. You'd just been innocently laying in your bed for the past few hours reading when suddenly there were sex noises and you wanted to fling yourself out your open bedroom window.

Just as you went to knock violently on his door, you heard the front door opening and footsteps up the stairs.

"Oh," Jinyoung said as soon as he saw you, loosening his suit's tie. "Hey."

Your cheeks heated as you glanced down at what you were wearing—a skimpy white tank top and a pair of pajama bottoms with illustrations of morbidly obese cats decorating the fabric. You crossed your arms over your chest in an 'x' formation as you turned around, smiling at him awkwardly. He gave your body a once over, then snorted.

"What keeps you up at this late hour, Cantaloupe?"

You rolled your eyes. Park Jinyoung thought he was funny.

"Ha-ha," you replied, monotonously. "You're hilarious."

Remembering why you were in the hallway being teased by Jinyoung, you looked back at the door and listened for a moment for any more noises coming from within his room. When there was a crash inside, there was suddenly an incomprehensible shout about how his dead grandma bought him that vase and then something else.

If it was incomprehensible, how did you know that?

You were able to make out a few words—that's how.

"Ah. He's making his noises again tonight, huh?"

"Yes, so if you'll excuse me—"

You went to knock on his door when Jinyoung suddenly reached out, grasping your wrist so it hung mid-air. You glanced over your shoulder at him then, furrowing your eyebrows just as he slowly let go.

Jinyoung had this thing where he hated confrontation, you remembered.

"Jinyoung," you huffed out. "If I don't say something, he'll just—"

"I know but surely he's almost done by now."

"Well, I need to say something."

Jinyoung sighed. "He hasn't listened to anything you've said to him before. What makes now any different?"

"So you want me to just walk to my room like a sissy when I could easily just knock on his door?"

"I just think there are better ways you can go about this. It'll just cause a disruption."

Your eyes bulged at that, jaw dropping. "And his weird sex noises won't?!"

Jinyoung paused, glancing at the door and you both listened again.

"See," he said. "He's done now. It's fine. Just go to sleep."

You tongued your cheek. "You have to live with him too, you know?"

"I know," he replied, solemnly. "Now... go to sleep, Cantaloupe."

And then you two parted ways to your separate rooms.

It was a week after that. Since it was summer, you basically just lounged around the house doing nothing but eating your weight in potato chips. You did have a part-time job but just not during the weekends, which coincidentally was when Jinyoung actually came home for an entire hour for his lunch break.

You didn't know why he didn't just eat out in the city but you weren't about to question it.

He always cleaned up after himself, picking up other people's messes. You hated that part of him because people should clean up their own messes. That's why the planet was doomed—because no one wants to clean up after themselves or leave it how they found it. Although he kept to himself, he was the glue that held you all together.

Walking into the kitchen, you saw him with his sleeves rolled up and holding a sponge, doing the dishes. Opening the wooden cabinets, you pulled out a box of mac and cheese, then looked for your pot to start boiling the water.

"Hey, Jinyoung," you began. "Have you seen my pot? I usually put it up here."

Your eyes fell onto the pot sitting at the oven at the same time—the dirty pot.

"You're fucking kidding me," you grumbled, stomping over to it.

Someone had decided to use your pot and then not clean up after themselves. And who the fuck heats up spaghettios in a fucking pan anyway? Why not just put it in a bowl and into the microwave? That's easier.

"The same person who left their dirty dishes in the sink," Jinyoung said after a moment.

For the first time, you looked closer at whose dishes Jinyoung was scrubbing at.

"Jinyoung, don't you have to eat still? Aren't you on your lunch break?"

"Yes, but I can't make anything with a dirty sink," he answered.

You sighed. "I can't stand him. Here... I'll help you."

Gently, you nudged his hip with yours, jostling him out of the way. He chuckled to himself, shaking his head, then grabbed one of the towels hanging on a nearby hook to wipe his hands as he observed you cleaning the dishes.

"God... I just can't believe him. He really doesn't care about anyone but himself."

"I'm sure he just... forgot..." Jinyoung mumbled, placing his hands on the edge of the sink.

"No. He did it on purpose, same with using my pan..." you grumbled.

Jinyoung then moved to grab your pot, turning the faucet on as you scrubbed at a large plate caked in pasta sauce, and went to soak it. As he went to work, you observed his side profile. He sure was handsome and you remembered how you wanted to ask him if he was single the moment you met.

A handsome guy like him had to have a girlfriend or something.

"What?" he asked, pausing mid-scrub when he caught you.

"Nothing," you quickly replied, turning back to the sink.

"No," he said, putting the pot in the isnk. "What is it?"

You shook your head. "It's nothing... You're just..."

Staring off into space, you looked back at him with a smile.

"You're just really handsome is all. I hope you know that."

Looking away from you, he blushed. "Thanks."

Stumbling, he reached forward and accidentally switched the faucet onto the setting where it sprayed water in tiny streams instead and then disconnected it from the sink. It landed upside down and caused water to completely soak both your shirts. You let out a shriek as you stepped back, the plate falling into the sink then.

"I'm so sorry!" he exclaimed and you looked at him in surprise, then down at your shirt.

You could see through it entirely, showing off your bra and your piercing nipples.

And then he handed you the towel beside the sink to cover yourself.

"They're just boobies, Jinyoung," you teased but he didn't turn around.

Snorting, you tossed the towel onto the counter and left the kitchen. Glancing back at him one more time as you gripped onto the staircase railing, you observed him scrubbing furiously at your pot with tinted cheeks.

A few days after that incident, you came storming out of your room to your neighbor having sex once again.

The annoying, not hot one. It wasn't Jinyoung having sex.

"Jinyoung?" you called, knocking on his door.

Your neighbor was playing music to cover up whatever he was doing, but you could still fucking hear him. How could he be so oblivious to how loud he was? Did he just fuck girls who really knew how to use their mouths?

Maybe you should ask for their phone numbers.

"Come in," he yelled over the music.

Stomping in, you slammed the door behind you. Although you'd been in his room a few times, it was always rearranged a different way each time. You did notice that Jinyoung was an extreme perfectionist.

"You hear that, right?" you asked, crossing your arms.

"Yeah. And I'm trying to study, too..." Jinyoung grumbled.

"I can't believe him. What if I was trying to sleep?"

You paced around his room, letting out an occasional growl as the song ended and there was an awkward pause. Jinyoung's head came up just as there was a loud crashing sound and moan from the other side of the wall.

Jinyoung snorted. "You? Sleeping before two in the morning?"

"Okay. Fine... Maybe I wasn't but still—"

"You can stay here, if you want."

"Really? I won't bother you?"

"No. I'm done anyway."

Jinyoung leant back into his desk chair, closing his book with a gentle slam before standing up to put it away on his large bookshelf. After a moment, he walked over to his bed and settled against it, still in his work clothes. The TV had still been playing even when you walked in, so you guessed he'd been trying to mask the music and sex.

You followed him to his bed, sitting beside him gingerly.

"So—" you started to say when a sex scene came on.

The two actors on the screen immediately began undressing and you hesitantly looked over at Jinyoung, who was trying to decide whether to act natural or look away—because what do you even do in that situation? A sex scene makes things awkward no matter what. You could pretend all you wanted that it wasn't awkward—but it was.

"S-So... What were you studying for?"

"My accounting exam," he replied.

"Really? You have to study for that?"

There were now both sex noises from the TV and the room next door. From the corner of your eye, you saw Jinyoung fidgeting, scratching at his chin nervously as he avoided looking straight at the television screen.

You grabbed the remote then, turning the volume to drown out the noises from your neighbor.

As you could still hear him, however, you stomped towards the door to tell him to shut up.

Jinyoung followed after you, grabbing a hold of your elbow out of nowhere, but that just caused you to trip on one of his shoes—and where did that even come from because his room was spotless—and the two of you came crashing down on his hardwood floor with Jinyoung under you. He stared at you with wide eyes then.

The front of your pants was pressed especially hard against him and you felt something.

"Jinyoung..." you breathed out.

He blinked, then asked, "Yes?"

"I have this crazy idea."

Jinyoung didn't have much time to think before your lips came crashing down on his.

His lips were so soft, like kissing a cloud from how moist they were, but he was still beneath your crushing mouth. His arms laid unmoving at his sides, not even moving to touch you with the tip of his finger. And after you unconsciously began to swirl your hips and grind into him powerfully, he groaned into your mouth.

"Touch me," you said, pulling away briefly to give him time to speak.

Instead of saying anything, he just stared at you in muted surprise.

"Touch me, Jinyoung," you said again, grabbing at his limp hands.

You brought them to touch your covered breasts but he didn't move an inch, didn't even glance down at your breasts on full display—just kept looking at you and occasionally down at your lips as you exhaled shakily.

When his palm gave a slight, hesitant squeeze, you knew you had him.

You threw yourself back into him, kissing him as hard as you could to elicit any sort of reaction out of him, and he finally responded. Starting with returning it, he eventually licked at your lips and his hands drifted away from your breasts to grab your hips, then finally wrapping around your waist to crush you more into his hard, defined chest.

The voices from the actors on screen as they had a passionate get-together with their genitals faded into the background, as well as the sounds coming from the opposite side of the wall. Right then, it was just you and Jinyoung as you kissed and touched each other so intimately you felt your hairs sticking up. He was always out of your reach—so far away—either physically or emotionally. You thought he was unavailable, three years older than you and in grad school already while you were still taking gen ed classes. That's what you thought, but as he licked the seam of your lips and thrusted his tongue inside your mouth, he felt touchable for the first time—reachable.

His hands trailed back to your waist before flipping the two of you over until you flat on your back. Even with the sex scene on the television screen long over as new actors took up their own screentime, you didn't tell him to stop—not even when you heard nothing from the adjacent bedroom, too. It was that familiar white noise.

But you didn't like to sound of nothing as Jinyoung stared down at you, hesitantly.

You wanted to hear something. You wanted to hear anything—and from him.

You weaved your fingers into his black hair, pulling him down until your lips connected once again, which coaxed him to relax and touch you again. His hips moved against yours as you ground into each other—sensually. When his hardening length brushed against one specific spot, you moaned out loudly, and he pulled away from you.

"Don't stop," you told him desperately, fingers still clinging on to his hair.

When he didn't budge, you sat up slowly, furrowing your eyebrows. He moved away from you to give you room, as if you were about to tell him you changed your mind, but then you pushed him with the tips of your fingers so he was on his back. He didn't make a move to sit up and you took that as a sign to work on undoing his belt's buckle.

He didn't even try to stop you as you pulled at his work pants, just watched you with half-lidded eyes.

"Is this okay?" you asked, glancing down at his cock through his briefs.

"Yeah..." he answered, swallowing thickly.

Getting his consent, you watched him carefully but reached into his underwear for his cock, surprised at the size as you blinked in a daze. Just as he was looking like he was about to change his mind, you leant over him and your mouth sank down on him. Immediately, he felt how warm your mouth was and you didn't take your eyes off him—not even for one second. Your tongue swirled around him, licking at every inch of him you could. He didn't entirely fit in your mouth, so whatever didn't fit you just stroked with your balled up fist. His head fell back against the floor with a thud as he groaned out loudly. His eyes snapped open at that, looking at his bedroom wall.

"W-Wait—" he started to say, but you didn't stop.

Instead, your grip on him tightened as you went even faster, pulling him farther into your mouth until you felt the tip hit the back of your throat, pausing for a moment and wincing at the unpleasant feeling as you swallowed around him. His hands didn't know where to go, from laying at his sides to pulling at his tailored suit.

You didn't really know why he wore his work clothes for so long, even after he came home.

"Fuck..." he grunted, one of his hands cupping the back of your head.

You'd never heard him curse before and you could feel yourself getting wet just at the sound of it, and then began to bob on his dick even faster, your eyes watering slightly. Jinyoung started to unconsciously thrust into your mouth then, his hips raising off the floor each time, and you welcomed it, trying to take all of him.

"Shit!" he cried out as you swallowed around him again.

Pulling him completely out of your mouth, you used your tongue to lick at the slit, running a wet strip from the base of his cock all the way to the underside of his tip, leaving a stream of saliva behind. He observed you with half-lidded eyes before his head fell back again, not being able to take the sight of you looking at him like that.

"Shit... You're so good at this... Fuck... I'm going to cum."

You pulled your mouth away and just sat on your heels, watching him come undone just from you stroking him in a blurred movement of your fist. However, before he even came, he frantically told you to stop.

"Jinyoung..." you started to say, slowing your pace slightly.

"No, I mean it... I don't want..." he trailed off. "I don't want him to hear me."

"He wants us to hear him, though. And plus, you sound so hot anyway..."

"Fuck..." he said at your words. "I'm— Fu—ck. I'm—"

"Cum in my mouth."

You descended your mouth back on him as you continued to stroke him frantically. He didn't seem to hear you—or at least didn't respond—but spurts of his cum came firing into your mouth until he was laying there like a worm.

His head thudded against the floor after, smiling slightly to himself, but then remembered you.

"No, it's okay," you said, knowing what he was thinking. "I think he's done now, so thanks."

"Wait— What about you—"

"You just owe me one."

And then you left.

"Hey."

You looked to the open doorway of your bedroom to see it was Jinyoung. Still in his work clothes, you laughed to yourself. He wore that suit so often that you thought it was just another layer of his skin.

Good thing he looked hot in a suit.

"Hey," you replied, putting down your book beside you on the bed.

You sat up as he looked around your bedroom, admiring some of the paintings you had hanging on the wall and your calendar beside the door that had a different cat for each month, the dates decorated with cat ears.

"Can I join you?" he asked after a moment, closing the door behind him.

"Sure," you said, sitting up. "What's up?"

"Well..." By the color of crimson his ears turned, you knew it had to be about what happened the other day on his bedroom floor—the whole his dick in your mouth thing. "I just— I felt bad about— You know... So, I— Uh..."

"You want to pay me back?"

"Yeah. Is that okay?"

You bit your lip and nodded.

Kicking his shoes off by your door, he walked over to your bed. It creaked beneath his weight as he sat down and then he turned to you, just staring at you for a moment before he went to loosen his tie around his neck.

"Did you just get back from work?" you asked, watching him undress.

Jinyoung nodded. "Yeah. Five minutes ago."

"So... were you thinking about this all day?"

"It might've crossed my mind once or twice."

Your head fell back as you laughed. "That's hot."

His knees pressed them into the mattress when he started to move towards you, his tie long forgotten in a heap on your rug. Watching him carefully, you lowered yourself onto your back until he was hovering over you.

"Is our favorite neighbor here?" he asked lowly, his lips inches from yours.

"I don't think so. It's quiet, so that's how I know he's gone."

"Good. That means you can be as loud as you want."

"Ooh, spicy..." you said, waggling your eyebrows.

"Take off your pants," he instructed.

"Why can't you do it for me?"

"I'm about to do a lot for you."

Raising an eyebrow, you did as he said and pulled at your denim shorts. He couldn't wait, though, and helped you tug them the rest of the way down your legs as you raised your hips, flinging them somewhere behind him.

Next was your underwear but surprisingly, when you went to remove them, he stopped you.

"Not yet."

His mouth came crashing down on yours, smothering your lips with his own. At first, the kiss was fast and messy, your tongues colliding together in a frenzy, but then he was pulling away from you to leave a trail of kisses from the corner of your lips, to your jaw, to your neck, before finally landing on your chest from your low-cut shirt.

Your hands came to crush his mouth to your chest when he just looked at the soft fabric of your shirt, leaving wet spots where he bit and nipped over your covered nipples. You cried out then, arching your back into his mouth.

He raised an eyebrow and took you rubbing your legs together as a sign for him to take it farther.

Crawling down your body, he stopped until his head was between your legs, kissing at your inner thighs and biting and sucking at the skin there until you were marked in blotches of purple and red. One of his fingers played with the band of your underwear, snapping it against your skin teasingly, and you exhaled shakily.

"I didn't know you were such a tease..." you said, smiling with your eyes closed.

"It's no fun when you get your way, though."

And then he fingered at your underwear again, lifting it up and pushing it to the side so he could cup you. Just from the pads of his fingers touching you there, he could feel how wet you were—and all because of him.

"You're making this too easy."

His middle finger slowly eased into your entrance, stroking at your walls gently as he pumped in and out of you. His thumb then came to press down on your clit and you moaned out, a scalding sensation shooting straight into your lower stomach. He took that as another good sign and then inserted his forefinger into you, his fingers thrusting in and out of you at a faster pace with each drawn out moan and each wiggle of your hips. Eventually, he had to use the hand pulling your underwear back to still your hips and the soaked fabric came to rest on the back of his hand.

Unconsciously, you moved away from him and so he pulled his fingers out of you. You opened your eyes then, looking up at him as he sucked each finger into his mouth, licking off your wetness. Feeling faint, you sighed to yourself, wiggling your hips again and clenching your walls around nothing in anticipation. It was nice to be fingered and it was even better to cum, but you wanted to cum on his dick—you wanted to cum on it now.

"Jinyoung," you breathed out. "I want you."

"You can't have me," he answered. "Not yet."

"Well, why the fuck not?!" you yelled, sitting up on your elbows.

He couldn't answer because then the two of you heard loud, thunderous footsteps up the stairs and the bedroom door next to yours slamming shut. You listened and signed internally as you heard a female voice giggling and then a gruff male one, the bed creaking as you assumed they were both lying in his bed now.

"Great..." you mumbled to yourself, bending over your bed to look for your pants.

"No," Jinyoung said. "It's okay. I want to keep going. Is that okay?"

You looked back at him and nodded, surprised.

This wasn't like him at all. Jinyoung had never once brought a girl over—never. You knew he had sex but he never had sex here, and that was because he was so self-conscious. So, it was very surprising he wanted to keep going.

He pulled your underwear completely off that time, following your pants and landing somewhere behind him.

Jinyoung didn't waste any time and immediately ducked his head and flicked at your clit with his tongue, causing you to cry out. The giggling stopped in the other room and you placed a hand over your mouth, looking at him.

Time stood still as you two waited for them to resume and they did—after a painfully long sixty seconds.

"Be quiet," he whispered and then went back to pressing kisses to your clit.

He inserted his finger again, using his thumbs to separate your folds and you clenched your hand into a fist against your mouth, breathing heavily. Instead of how he was taking his time before, he was rushing things.

"Jinyoung," you said. "It's okay. I'll be quiet. Just slow down."

He nodded, pulling his fingers out of you.

Then replaced them with his mouth.

"Fuck..." you said, softly.

"Feel good?" he whispered back.

You nodded, head falling back and hand slamming against your mouth as he thrusted his tongue inside of you. His nose brushed against your clit and you breathed out of your nose slowly, trying to contain yourself. Then one of his hands pulled away and his thumb came against your clit again, circling it wildly when he lowered his head to bring his nose away. Your juices coated his chin as he started to wildly lick and kiss at your inner walls, then brought his mouth away to watch you, inserting his fingers again. His knuckles brushed against you as he went deeper and deeper before he felt around for that special spot—then found it easily, smiling to himself at your reaction.

Red hot in the face, sweat lining your brow, gasping for air—you were a mess for him.

You could barely contain yourself then and you reached behind you for your pillow, smothering your face.

"Jinyoung!" you screamed through the pillow but he kept going. "Oh, god... Oh, god. I'm going to— I'm—"

The two of you hadn't even noticed the talking stopped again before you moaned into the pillow loudly, hips rising as you came roughly around his fingers. He helped you ride out your orgasm, slowing his pace but not stopping.

Your hips came down to rest on the mattress again and you sighed—you were laying there like a worm now.

"How was that?" he asked, pleased with himself.

"Good god... So good... Wow. You're so good with—"

He chuckled. "Thanks. I owed you one, though."

You smiled up at him, then pushed yourself up to sit beside him, nudging your shoulder with his as you smiled to yourself. If this was him paying you back for sucking his dick, you wondered how he fucked with that dick.

"But that doesn't mean I don't owe you one."

"No, no, no. You don't owe me anything."

"Maybe not. But I still want you to fuck me."

Jinyoung looked at the wall behind you then, shaking his head. Pouting, you nodded, understanding that maybe all this was just him returning the favor, not meaning he was interested in you like that at all.

"We can't..." he whispered.

"It's okay, but why not?"

"We can't right now. Later."

"Okay, but I hope you really mean later."

He nodded. "Later. Really, really later."

And then he walked out of your room.

After Jinyoung left, your neighbor took that as a sign to fuck his girlfriend.

How nice for the both of them. For her to have a penis in her, not that you could relate.

It'd been at least seven hours now and you didn't even know if Jinyoung was still in the house. He walked on light feet, so you never heard him walking around, so he could've easily left to go somewhere. Maybe he left to fuck someone else since you were pretty sure he got a massive boner. And yet, he didn't want to fuck you.

Later, he said.

When was that? Maybe you should've discussed that properly so you would know when that even was.

Angry and sex-deprived, you stomped out of your room after hearing the annoying sound of your neighbor snoring after a long, torturous hour and a half, and into the kitchen. A glass of cold water would calm down your temper, so you reached into the cabinet to grab one of your glasses, reaching into the freezer for some ice cubes. You struggled to even get the cubes out of the tray, however, and contemplated slamming it on the countertop.

A touch on your shoulder, though, startled you and you accidentally slammed the tray on the countertop anyway.

"It's okay!" they said, the warm voice familiar. "It's me. It's Jinyoung."

Closing your eyes in relief, you placed a hand over your beating heart and then turned around to look at him.

"And where have you been?" you asked, teasingly, with an eyebrow raised.

Though, you also really wanted to know the answer to that, too.

"My room. Why did it take you seven hours to leave?"

"What? Were you waiting for me or something?"

He nodded. "Yeah. I didn't want to... in your room."

Your mouth fell open as you felt like a fucking idiot.

It was kind of obvious, now that you thought about it.

"Sorry... I didn't— Well, I'm here now, so do your worst."

One corner of his lips tilted up at that, and then he looked around the kitchen. When his eyes fell on the dining room table, he grinned and tugged your hand to follow him. You set your glass down on the counter, already feeling that familiar excitement bubble inside of you at the thought of what he was going to do to you.

If his fingers made you feel that good, you couldn't even imagine what his dick would feel like.

"Lay on the table."

You hopped up on the table just as he asked, then laid down, already reaching for your pants, but he slapped your hand away. Cradling your hands to your chest, you snorted at the impatient look on his face.

"I didn't say to take off your clothes," he teased, tugging at the band.

"Okay but... What's so different about here? They'll still probably hear us."

"You're probably right. It's a good thing I don't care. Do you?"

Then why didn't you just come back? you asked no one in particular.

Oh, well.

"Hell no. Fuck me, Jinyoung."

"I will. Just be patient."

You growled out, frustrated.

"Come on. You don't need to finger me when you just did that seven hours ago—"

"I know but I want to," he said, then pulled at the band of your pants again.

From over the top of his head, you carefully watched the staircase, listening for any sounds that weren't muffled snores from your neighbor's bedroom. If he came downstairs, he'd have a good view of your pussy.

"He's not going to come down here. Relax."

Just as his finger entered you, you said, "Wait. Can I try something first?"

He nodded, pulling away from you and you sat up, hopping off the table. Kneeling before him, you unbuttoned his pants quickly—and struggled for a moment—and pulled him out of his underwear, licking your lips nervously.

"I want you to fuck my mouth," you told him.

"What?" he asked, surprised. "Really?"

"Yeah."

"All right."

You gripped him at the base and slowly wrapped your lips around him, then relaxed your mouth as you closed your eyes. Biting into his lip, Jinyoung anxiously gripped the back of your head to get a good hold on you and weaved his fingers into your hair. You seemed to like that, though, when you moaned around his length.

And when you nodded, he took that as the signal and thrusted into your mouth.

Your eyes watered as he fucked your mouth, wincing but loving every second. When his fingers tugged at your hair, nearly pulling the strands right out of their roots, you moaned around him again and he groaned at that.

You swallowed around him, eliciting him to go faster, fuck your throat harder—and he did. His hips moved back and forth wildly as he frantically rammed his cock into you. With each thrust, you had to keep yourself still and relax your throat, feeling it becoming sore but it was worth it. Your hands felt his thighs, nails digging into the soft fabric of his work pants that he never took off for some reason—when suddenly he pulled out of you.

"If you keep doing that, I'm going to cum," he explained, gasping for air. "Your turn."

You nodded and laid back down on the table. It was as if him nearly reaching his orgasm made him even more impatient and he tugged at your underwear so roughly that the material stretched, but you didn't yell at him.

In fact, you found the whole thing incredibly hot.

He fell to his knees and immediately started an intense pace with his fingers inside of you, easing in and out at a frantic speed while he tried to stretch you out as much as possible. Your toes curled at the sensation and he watched you carefully, smiling as your eyes closed and mouth dropped open. If possible, his fingers thrusted into you even faster, so fast that you could almost imagine they were his dick—except you hoped his dick was bigger.

"Please," you begged, grabbing onto his arm. "Fuck me."

His pace slowed down but he didn't pull out of you, until he pressed down on your clit and your back arched.

"Please! Fuck—please," you cried out.

He nodded quickly, stepping away from you to step out of his pants and completely remove his briefs.

Your eyes fell to him naked from the waist down and you almost drooled, but then he was pulling at your hips so you stood on your feet, then spun you around until your cheek came crashing down on the wooden table.

"Ready?" he asked.

"Ye—s."

You were jostled forward as soon as he took that first step—his cock pressing into you so deeply that you couldn't help but groan, your nails clawing into the table. His warm hands held your hips and you knew you wanted nothing more than for him to slap your ass. That's what would get you off. Nothing was hotter than him manhandling you.

"Jinyoung," you gasped out as he kept up a fast pace. "Spank me."

"Spank you? You're into that?"

You nodded into the table.

Hesitating slightly, he did as you asked and brought his hand to slap your ass softly and you moaned softly. He blinked, stopping his thrusts inside of you to do it again—but harder. You clenched your fists as his hand came down on you even harder, feeling the sting that time. Your walls clenched around him then and he groaned.

"You really like this?" he asked.

"Yeah. Just like that."

He paused, then looked around the room for a moment.

You were pulled up abruptly then, your eyes snapping open, as he pulled you over to the living room couch before sitting down, tugging at your hand so you were sitting in his lap but not crushing his dick coated in your wetness.

"Ride me," he told you.

You didn't need to be told twice and slowly gripped him from under you, easing him into you slowly. Both of you moaned out at that and his hand slapped your ass again, slapping you harder each time you pulled yourself up.

"Keep going," he said, massaging your skin.

You nodded and bounced up and down on him even faster, seeking that familiar sting and the feeling of him penetrating you. His head fell against the back of the couch then, moaning loudly as you continued to ride him. Blindly, his free hand reached for you and then the pad of his thumb pressed into your clit, causing you to cry out and ride him even faster—harder—swirling your hips and clenching around him as you chased after your orgasm.

He pulled away from your clit and brought both of his hands to your ass, pulling and grabbing at the flesh there and kneading his knuckles into it. One hand came down on your ass again as the slap sounded around the living room and you clenched around him again, your vision blurring as all you could feel was that spark ignite in you.

On the edge, his hands trailed past your ass until they were gripping the small of your back and flipped you over onto your stomach. Raising your ass in the air, he thrusted into you again and pressed down on the back of your head, your cheek pressing into the couch cushion as he rammed into you.

"J-Jinyoung! Fuck, fuck, fuck!" you cried out, fists clenching.

He reached around you then and squeezed your breasts. With each thrust, they swung forward and he squeezed even harder. You rested your head against the back of your arms, trying to hold on but knowing you were so close to cumming. His dick stroked every inch of you and you knew you were going to be sore after.

"I'm gonna—"

"Cum."

He felt you clench around him one more time as you came, arching your back and then falling limply onto the couch. Jinyoung powered through it, however, and managed to thrust a few more times before he came himself, feeling you cringe from the oversensitivity.

His head fell back against the opposite arm of the couch then, chuckling, while you laid on the other side.

"So, that happened," he said after a long moment of silence.

"Yeah. Can it happen again?" you asked with a smirk.

And then you laughed all the way back upstairs.

Jinyoung was eating breakfast the next morning and you decided to clean up after your dirty neighbor so that when Jinyoung came home for his lunch break, he could spend that time eating rather than cleaning up after him.

Speak of the devil and he shall appear, though.

Your neighbor came stumbling down the stairs in his pajamas, greeting you two as he came into the kitchen.

"Hey, guys," he said, then seemed to hesitate. "Were you guys— last night— Can you keep it down next time?"

Jinyoung's cheeks heated at that, almost burying his head in his bowl of cereal shamefully while you just snorted.

He'd acted all confident last night but it sounded just like him to be embarrassed immediately after.

"Sure," you lied. "Sorry about all the noise."

"Thanks," he said and then grabbed a banana from the fruit bowl.

You looked back at Jinyoung and laughed as he refused to make eye contact with you, his cheeks almost the same color as the last apple in the bowl. Embarrassment wasn't something you felt often, so you were more proud.

You and Jinyoung had become the noisy neighbors now.

[coalitiongirl]

ive been watching your scenes to rewatch and ive been crying at literally all of them. out of curoisity, what are your favourite ouat scenes? either sq or general? also side note, i love your latest fic, such an interesting premise. i get so scared every time someone says an order and emmas forced to comply, that scene with the trolls had me on edge. and the fact that cora must suspect something about emma now - im so scared but excited ahah :D have a nice day :)

OH I super dropped the ball on those omg, i have so many others!! but i haven’t been able to rewatch in a long time, it hard 😩

of course i LOVE almost every swan queen scene!! it’s hard for me to pick favorites because nearly every one pings something else inside me omfg. I don’t think there’s a single sq scene I couldn’t write an essay about WHOOPS. so lemme try to answer this with just some of my favorite non-sq scenes 😅

Emma in True North: hoo boy, this is probably in my scenes to rewatch but that scene on the road, MAN. there’s so much careful buildup with emma’s abandonment issues and how much she sees herself in nick and ava. and they have a chance she never does and dammit, she fights for them!! she fights for two kids just like her and they get their moment and jmo turns that realization into agony with sheer artistry in emma’s FACE in their final moment. god.

Regina in We Are Both: this was the episode that sold me on Regina! tbh i’d marathoned s1 as soon as they announced mulan was going to be in s2 so i hadn’t been focusing much on thinking before that?? and then suddenly there’s Regina, in all her rich and layered stories, and i fell hARD. the whole narrative of the episode- Regina resisting parental abuse until she becomes what she’s always feared to be free!! and that translating into her saying ‘no, this isn’t going to continue to the next generation. even if i lose the only thing that matters to me.’ do u ever stan!!! I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE VERY WELL. END ME.

Emma in Firebird: listen. never follow ur idols to ur next fandom or you’ll suddenly realize they actually hate women and then get ‘’’muted’’’ for ‘’’yelling at her too much’’’ but jane espenson did a GOOD with the flashbacks in this one (present day still literal and figurative hell tho!!). The concept of Emma’s jacket as armor isn’t an original one, but the execution was honestly stellar. Emma forging this connection with an older hardened woman who can’t let go of the past either!! emma destroyed and remade into the lady we met on her twenty-eighth birthday. GOD. SHE FINDS HER DAUGHTER. and i gotta say, the vulnerable-tearful-young thing jmo was doing w emma in s5 didn’t work for me in terms of what present day was trying to convey, but it’s a perfect fit for that flashback, i WEPT.

Regina in Quite A Common Fairy: Lana OWNS the cave scene with Tink, god. The depth and breadth of emoTION. The episode and the narrative itself builds it up from episode one! because this regina on the road to redemption but finally giving us a glimpse into the emotional and mental state she was in as the young queen- she has all this rage and she’s SUSTAINED by it, it’s her only real truth and constant and she’s terrified of what might happen if she lets it go for even an instant and chooses hope instead. (Lana’s voice when Regina says she’s afraid that without rage she might just ‘—float away’ is something that has stayed with me for a long, long time.) REGINA PULLING OUT HER HEART TO MAKE A POINT. far from the last time she will, but how affecting!! god!!

Emma and Snow in S1: There are a few moments i’m thinking of (and i’m literally writing this on the treadmill so pls forgive the lack of episode names) and all of them are so stellar, god. The moment when Snow finds Emma living out of her car early on. Snow and Emma sitting at the table at the loft holding hands. Emma lying down next to a crying Snow. Snow yelling at Emma for being so selfish when she tries running off with Henry?? EMMA SHOWING UP AT MARY MARGARET’S DOOR SEARCHING FOR A ~PERSON~ AND MARY MARGARET SILENTLY LETTING HER IN. Snow and Emma work best in S1 in the silences and the fights, where they’re allowed to just care and be family, and I treasure each of those moments as much as they do.

Regina and Zelena in the Kansas: There’s a lot of effort put into this dynamic right near what seemed like the end, playing with how exactly Zelena perceives her happy ending to go- and then Regina strikes it all down by being different, by changing, by being someone Zelena hadn’t believed either of them capable of. And then Regina goes to Zelena’s cell and offers her!! sisterhood!! my god. i instantly fell in love with the dynamic in that moment and i’m forever pressed that the ‘it’s nice to have family in town’ line was cut. because you can tell that regina craves family and craves unmaking this second monster of her mother’s and zelena was going to TAKE that second chance and hey! this seems the perfect time to go off-message and

Belle in Family Business and Heroes and Villains: imma be honest, i like belle just fine in the early seasons but i have zero interest in rumbelle, which means a lot of fast-forwarding through her scenes. But these two scenes were ENCHANTING. Mirror Belle preying on Belle with the truth that she’s afraid to face! Emilie does such a fantastic job conveying so much cruelty in that scene, I was gaping and enthralled and hoping shattered sight was going to work exactly like that (and tbh props to ginny for doing a hella creepy snow at the start of Shattered Sight). And that town line scene!!! What a stunning, evocative scene. Belle reclaiming agency and taking action in such a 100% cold-blooded but necessary way!! that’s my ravenclaw babe!!!

Mulan and Aurora: I was young, and I Believed, and I Believed for a very long time. I am appalled at my naïveté too, don’t worry.

Regina in Enter the Dragon: LOOK it’s not about the leather but it’s a lil about the leather!!! I really appreciate both Regina in the past and present in this one and also how gay it is, and I’m most charmed by lil evil pep talking nugget Regina who just wants you to be the very best villain you can be! It’s such an artful melding of the exuberance of young!Regina and the delight in chaos of eq!Regina and i, for one, am a fan.

Emma (and Henry) in The Stranger/An Apple Red as Blood: my gOD. Okay I think one of the first times I cried while watching this show was in Emma’s desperate, hysterical denial to August about the curse. She’s so clearly hit rock bottom and she’s TERRIFIED of believing and it’s breaking her. SHE DIDNT ASK TO BE RESPONSIBLE FOR EVERYONES HAPPINESS. SHE DOESNT WANT IT. THAT IS CRAP!!!! i love her!! i love emma swan!!! i do!!!!! and then moving into the end of the next episode when she tells henry she’s leaving and just!! ‘henry! life isn’t a story!’ man this show had some incredible early work. sigh. emma kneeling in front of henry begging him to listen! my god.

Regina in the Cricket Game: so i’m leaving out all my fave sq moments which severely limits the number of regina and emma scenes i can talk about here but the flashbacks in this one SURE ARE SOMETHING. regina has hit rock bottom in this set and you feel it in every moment, in her REGRET THAT I HAVE NOT CAUSED MORE PAIN and frickin stABBING snow and that dark scene with the candle oh god. this is a regina who doesn’t think about looking back anymore but who doesn’t think about looking forward, either, and she’s terrifying. it reminds me a lot of the scene later this season in Welcome to Storybrooke where she takes out snow’s heart and ‘see? i can have everything’ but there are tears sliding down her face. regina in enraged despair is something to behold!!

Henry (and Emma and Regina) in Operation Mongoose: Henry doesn’t often get lengthy times to shine that aren’t about other characters, but he was literally a YA hero in the author’s universe! man! what a kid! and his scenes with bandit Regina are some of my all-time favorites, as is that heartstopping moment when he reaches the top of that tower and flings the door open and Emma KNOWS him. reader, i wept. i wept hard. talk about your earned moments!!!

Emma as Dark Swan: posture! clothing! positioning! voice work! dark swan was a revelation i’m still rightfully bitter about, because she was EVERYTHING in those early episodes. the way she caressed snow’s face in first episode of 5a. the faux-innocent with the calculating eyes on the ship with whats-his-name. every interaction with henry where she was trying to be a PERSON. the way she moved! the way she felt more reptilian than human! i wanted to know everything about her!! (then i did and quit the show lol) honestly some of jmo’s best acting to date, i’m forever in awe.

That Still Small Voice: look, this is an episode about a cricket and it remains one of my favorite quality ouat episodes. Archie sells it best as an adult influenced by his past without quite knowing it, and Archie and Henry make for a really engaging dynamic in here. There is nothing about Archie’s professional behavior that doesn’t make me want to scream but this remains a very, very good episode.

Emma in Sympathy for the De Vil/Lily: okay this is cheating a little because so much of this is also Regina but!! Emma individually shines in this narrative and throughout 4b. From the moment she finds out about what her parents had done, you can watch it slowly draining a part of her?? yes her eyes got redder but there was also this kind of apathy about EVERYTHING. And tbh the Cruella episode is pretty awesome on its own (I love the slow revelation that Cru is the villain, what a stellar execution of a fave trope) but WHEN EMMA KILLS HER. In the exact moment that Cruella says ‘heroes don’t kill’. that’s what pushes emma over the edge!! and then emma ready to kill again the next episode because she feels like she’s sliding into an abyss, i couldn’t BREATHE. emma is incredible when the narrative lets her be angry, and i wanted So Much More. Speaking of which, Emma getting angrier and angrier and almost losing it in The Snow Queen was more of that anger!! i am HUNGRY for it.

Regina and Snow in The Evil Queen: This episode is messy af but damn did my heart skip a beat when a hooded hero saves Regina and tears off her hood and it’s SNOW. This episode does so much of what makes Snow/Regina so fascinating and frustrating, both in the present and the past. Their interactions in the woods moved me! changed me! and Regina had already crossed the point of no return but oh man, oh man, the way they’d almost gotten somewhere for a minute there.

Regina and Henry in Save Henry: A classic, a work of art, and I’ve said so much about it in the past that I’m exhausted just thinking about expressing it all again now. But what a STORY of an evil queen who falls in love with a little boy. What a narrative!! The promo pictures from this episode came out when I was sitting in the hospital for a checkup while I was expecting my daughter, and I was tearing up and the nurses thought it was about the ultrasound. I’M NOT PROUD. This is a love story!!! And it culminates again in A Curious Thing, by the way, which put another ten years on my life, an Epic !

Emma and Henry in New York City Serenade: boy was this a journey, but I was absolutely spellbound omg. This was a love song to a fantasy but it’s a fantasy that never unmakes Emma– she’s afraid of commitment and happiness and everything permanent in her life that isn’t Henry, but she’s still going to take that leap despite herself. It’s a wonderful character study that captures Emma’s essence in a new world, with a new past.

Snow in The Miller’s Daughter: Snow is at her best when the show isn’t painting her with rose-colored glasses and we get to see her darker side, and I don’t think she ever gets quite as dark in the first three seasons as she is when she’s standing there, smiling earnestly at Regina as she tells her that the key to Cora loving Regina is in the poisoned heart she holds. My god. It’s so incredibly cold-blooded and vile, and it’s absolutely the kind of manipulative pragmatism that suits Snow best. I am enthralled and horrified.

Neal and Emma and Henry and Gold in Manhattan: This is one of those really cool scenes where even though I don’t particularly care for half the characters within it, everyone acted the hell out of it and it’s so GOOD. There’s so much tension and you’re holding your breath through the squabbling, and then Henry shows up and you KNOW. You know what’s going to happen and you’re terrified for Emma and it’s so visceral, right up until the instant when Neal demands Henry’s age and Henry shouts ELEVEN and my god, my god. What a reveal. What a scene.

There are more!! so many scenes and moments i’ve loved over the years. Emma and young!Lily! Snowing in Snow Falls! Anna of Arendale!! Snow and Emma in Lost Girl!! Ruby in Red Handed! The David/Emma dragon fight in A Land Without Magic! Regina tearing out that heart in The Doctor and meeting Daniel again?? Regina and her father in hell. all of Hat Trick. i think twenty is a good place to stop, but hoo boy, when this show was good, it was GOOD. alas.