#you want to know how much i've cried over this drama

[strangersteddierthings]

Beg You to Love Me

"I'm surprised you even remembered, Harrington," Eddie shrugs, hoping he comes off as aloof as he wants to, instead of shaky and unsure like he feels. He was sitting atop the picnic table, arms behind him trying to look as unaffected by Steve's presence as he can, but he's been thrown for a loop ever since Steve emerged from the woods instead of Robin Buckley, like he was expecting.

"Of course, I remember. I- I've never forgotten," Steve whispers, head down and fists clenched at his sides. He looks more like a child being wrongfully scolded than a man defending himself.

The words pull a scoff from Eddie, though. Never forgotten? What the fuck ever. "Right. Something to hold over me, then, if I'd stepped too far out of line? Mutually assured destruction?"

Steve's head snaps up and he looks horrified, which Eddie will admit to almost believing. Steve doesn't seem like the type to join the drama club but his acting's pretty fucking good. "What? No! I would have never- I would never have said anything about us to anyone."

"Right. Sure. Of course. Your own reputation to think about there."

Something like hurt flashes across Steve's face before it frosts over. This is the face he's used to see on Steve. Cold and distant. "I- whatever, man. I don't even know why I thought..." but Steve doesn't finish his sentence. He just shakes his head and turns his back on Eddie, heading back the way he came.

He doesn't know why that sparks a rage from deep within him. "Yeah, that's right. Tuck tail and runaway again!"

"I ran away?" Steve shouts back, turning sharply on his heel to glare at Eddie. "You think that I ran away?"

Eddie just spreads his hands to the empty clearing as if to say 'look at all this room around me you've never occupied'. "You weren't here, were you?"

"Because you told me to not be!" Steve stomps back to Eddie but stops a couple yards away.

"Like fuck I did," Eddie argues back, because he didn't tell Steve to go away. He'd told him-

"'If this isn't good enough for you, there's the fucking door.' That's what you told me," Steve quotes, "I thought it was pretty fucking clear what you wanted."

"Yeah, I fucking thought it was clear what I wanted," Eddie snarls, lunging from the picnic table, closing those last few feet to get into Steve's face. "Yet here we are!"

"Don't act like this is my fucking fault. Like you weren't the one who forced it to be my fault. My decision-"

"Yeah, it had to be your damn decision! You were dragging it out-"

"-because you were too much of a coward to do it your-fucking-self-"

"-acting like you were. Acting too good to actually slum it with the trailer trash-"

"-so of course I made the choice that was best for me. Because I deserved more-"

"-like what I had to offer you would never be good enough for the goddman King-"

"-than just being your hookup when I wanted to be-"

"-like I wasn't good enough to be your friend, much less-"

"-your fucking boyfriend!"

"-your fucking boyfriend!"

The contrast of this sudden silence that falls following their screaming match that ends with identical sentiments is jarring. Eddie feels wrong-footed and lost. Confusion and hurt mixing in him that he can see reflected on Steve's face.

"What?" Steve is the first to break the silence, drawing into himself. Arms crossing to hold himself at the elbows as he takes several steps back, as if to be able to see all of Eddie will clear the confusion he's feeling.

Eddie just stares back, slack jawed for a moment. That's. What. No, wait. Really, what? "What what?"

"You- you said 'if this isn't good enough for you, there's the fucking door'. How was I- I thought you- you were breaking up with me!" Steve cries, "you. You said that to make me pick, because you knew I wanted more and you didn't. That's- you were breaking up with me!"

Eddie's in just as much disbelief. "No, you broke up with me! I said if this isn't good enough but, like, I meant if I wasn't good enough. And you left! You walked out because I wasn't good enough to be with you!"

Steve looks stricken and he claws harder at himself, sort of folds into himself like he's going to be sick. "No. No no no, that's- then that means I- it's all been my fault. No no no no."

Eddie stares wide-eyed and frozen as Steve talks to himself. Eddie kind of feels nauseous. There's no way that this is possible. That these last two and a half years of heartbreak have been because of miscommunication. That they both thought the other was breaking up with them and neither actually wanted to.

"Why didn't you- Why didn't you say something?" Eddie asks.

Steve laughs at that, sounding a bit hysteric. "Me!? Why didn't you! I wasn't- I wasn't going to beg you to love me like I had with my parents. You were the one who told me I shouldn't have to do that!"

Yeah. He had. When Steve had broken down and cried on his bed, in his arms, wondering what it was he had done to lose his parents' love. Eddie told him it wasn't his fault, never would be, and that he would never need to beg for love from someone who does love him. It was the same advice Wayne had given him when he'd taken Eddie in.

"I already thought you were wanting to break up. You were being so distant, I thought..."

Steve sucks in a deep breath and nods, "Yeah. Yeah I was. I was scared of scaring you away. Of being too much. Because I- what I felt for you was a lot. I was afraid I'd chase you away if I continued to be so clingy. I pulled back, to reign it in but. Fuck. Fuck!"

Eddie drops to a squat. His legs feel like jelly and he can't keep standing. He squats and looks down so his hair becomes a curtain separating him from the reality of the situation, if only for a moment. Fuck is right.

He's spent his junior and first senior year being pissed at Steve. Hurt by him and what he thought happened. And it's- if Steve's being honest, it's all been for nothing. If they both wanted a deeper relationship, they could have had it. They might still be boyfriends if Eddie hadn't been so wrapped up in his Munson Doctrine. He'd been convincing himself Steve was embarrassed of him, and was working on breaking off their- whatever they were. But he hadn't been.

He's thought such terrible things about Steve over the years. God, what has Steve thought of him over the years? No. He doesn't want to know, actually. That's not what he cares about right now.

He lifts his head to see that Steve's plopped himself onto the ground, sitting cross legged, elbows on his knees and head in his hands.

"Steve. Steve!" He calls Steve's name out until he looks up, looks at him, "why'd you come out here?"

He laughs again, slightly less hysterically, and he's shaking his head like he can't believe what he's about to say. "I. Fuck, I was coming out here to beg you to love me."

"No you fucking weren't!" his tone is filled with disbelief.

"I was," Steve repeats, sounding amused and heartbroken at the same time. "I really, really was. Graduation's coming and I know you want to get out of Hawkins the second that happens and I'm. I was running out of time trying to get you to notice me again, so I was going to beg."

Notice him again? As if Steve doesn't haunt his every waking thought. As if he doesn't dream of Steve every night while his eyes seek him across the halls and in their few shared classes like he's the goddamn night sky and Eddie is a sailor lost at sea needing the north star to guide him home. Eddie's never not noticed him, and he thinks he has to come out here and beg? "When someone loves you, you don't have to beg."

"Yeah, I know," Steve sighs, defeated, which lets Eddie know that Steve does not, in fact, know. He looks away from Eddie, down to his lap.

Fuck, it's like every fantasy Eddie's had of them making up and then making out has been handed to him on a silver platter and he's blowing it. His words are too vague, too easily misinterpreted. Again. He falls forward on to his knees, hands catching him so he's on all fours like an animal. "Steve. I mean it. You don't have to beg."

"I get it, Eddie," Steve huffs, not looking at him. Not actually understanding.

Eddie starts to crawl the distance between them. Steve looks up then, probably to see what the fuck Eddie was doing with the shuffling sounds and the chain on his belt clacking. Eddie watches Steve's eyes go wide, mouth dropping open to a small 'o'. "See, the thing is, Steve," Eddie says, pulling himself up to be just on his knees to shuffle the last few inches closer. Steve leans back to keep his eyes on Eddie's face, which opens his lap up. "You said you know, but I don't think you do." Eddie brings his hands to rest on Steve's shoulders and Steve lets him. "You don't have to beg." He uses his hold on Steve's shoulders to balance himself as he swings a leg wide, to straddle Steve, then shifts his weight to repeat the process with his other leg before settling himself into Steve's lap. Steve's hands land on his hips and Eddie isn't sure if it's intentional or a reaction to Eddie plopping himself in his laps but he's going to believe it's the first one. "You've never had to beg with me."

Steve sucks in a sharp breath and then he collapses into Eddie. Steve's hands on his hips slide up and pull him into a hug, as close to Steve's body as he can get, while Steve shoves his head under Eddie's chin, into the junction of his neck and shoulder and breaths him in like it's the last breath Steve will ever take. "We're so stupid."

"Yeah," Eddie agrees, as he lifts one hand to hold the back of Steve's head while the other drops to rub soothingly at his back. "Yeah, we are."

They sit in the dirt, the closest they've been since that summer between '81 and '82. They should probably talk about. They're going to have to, if they want this to work. Full sentences with no hidden meanings, even though the thought of that kind of vulnerability makes Eddie skittish. It's going to be difficult, but it'll be worth it. Steve has always been worth it.

Eddie wants to say 'I love you', just to get it out, in the open, and not just implied, but there's a different first step to take. One that's actually a little easier. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"Me too," Steve whispers, "I'm sorry. I should have-"

"Shut up," Eddie cuts him off, voice quiet and soft as he can be. "This is, and I cannot stress it enough, a we situation."

The huff of laughter on his skin from Steve feels like the start of something. A new beginning, a start over. A re-do.

A goddamn miracle.

Later, they'll drag themselves apart and up. Make it to the back of Eddie's van in the school parking lot to talk. Going to either's house feel too much, too soon. Their big fight happened at Eddie's home, and Steve's house isn't warm enough for the kind of comfort they want to share.

They'll have a talk. Filled with long pauses, stumbling over words and fears and insecurities because this is the hard part of a relationship. Getting it all out in the open so they can learn if they'll even work. The fear that they aren't going to be compatible anymore looms but doesn't deter. They both want a second chance, to give it a real shot, by the end of that first talk. But taking it slow.

They'll discuss what went wrong the first time (diving in without talking about anything certainly played a big part) and how to avoid that.

But that's later. Right now, Eddie just holds Steve, and Steve holds him back, and it certainly feels like the beginning of something good.

-

@i-less-than-three-you @nburkhardt @afewproblems

[xxgoblin-dumplingxx]

i've been having a couple of downer days recently, and i kept looking for a verse i haven't read thrice yet for some comfort, but you're age! gap verse has been a pleasant escape even though its not what i was looking for. you're writing never fails to make me feel better ari 💕💕

Here's how they met 💜

Bruce sighed. He was starting to hate talk show appearances, but at least this one had never been too bad. Angelique was chatty and fun but not grating. Her show ran as school let out. So grannies watched after their naps and kids watched getting off the bus. She ran a little something for everyone.

He assumed he was here for the grannies.

"I'm so sorry I'm late the shoot ran over and I couldn't get away."

The voice caught his attention. Not the fake starlet over dramatic gushing, but genuine distress. And he half turned to look. You looked like you came from a shoot. Straight off the pages of a glossy magazine.

"No worries, Miss Y/L/N we got your call in enough time. We'll just touch up your face and you'll be good to go," the manager greeting you, said.

Bruce smiled a little. Clearly, you were a frequent guest. You thanked him profusely and trotted off. Not needing to be told where to go. And as you go, there's several crew members you can greet by name. You've either been here a lot or worked with them before. Or both. But, it's endearing.

He turned back around listening to Angelique get her updates on where production was. "-And Y/N is in hair and makeup as we speak."

"Oh, bless her heart," Angelique said. "That's what I get calling her last minute." She turned to Bruce and held out her hand, "Are you ready?" she asked.

"As I'll ever be," he chuckled taking her hand, "You know these sorts of things aren't my forte. My oldest on the other hand-"

"Don't you worry about a thing," Angelique reassured him, patting the hand she was holding before letting it go. "Y/N is an old pro- Ah! speak of the devil!" She swooped over and kissed you on either cheek. "You look absolutely divine, is that one of yours?"

"You know it is," you tell her laughing, returning the gesture. "As if I could walk in and NOT wear my own design, you'd never let me live it down."

"So true. Darling," she said grabbing your hand and pulling you over to Bruce, "I want you to meet Bruce. You'll be on stage together today. You know it's charity week and I though it would be great to highlight all the work you do for school arts programs along side the Wayne foundation," she said.

"Hello," you tell him, holding out your hand.

"Pleased to meet you," he said, taking the hand you offered warmly. Giving you his most charming smile. You did look good. And he could tell they hadn't done much to your face or your hair. "I'm a big fan of your work," he commented.

Your smile didn't falter but your eyes narrowed slightly. And Bruce cringed internally Shit. She thinks I mean the Playboy spread, he thought. "Your last movie, the drama, especially. The range of emotion and the depth- It really was incredible."

"Thank you," you tell him. "It was challenging but I really enjoyed it."

Bruce felt his face heat when Angelique coughed and he remembered hearing that you had the ability to make someone feel like they were the only person in the room. He'd forgotten for just a second. In just that brief moment that he was waiting for an appearance. "It showed I uh- my kids made fun of me when I cried at the end-"

"Aww, Angelique gushed, "This is amazing. you guys keep up this chemistry. It'll go totally viral." She bounced on the balls of her feet and kissed your cheek again, "I'll have someone bring you a coffee, sweetie. You're going to start wilting soon."

And before you could say anything or Bruce could offer to go and get it for you himself, Angelique had bustled off to find and assistant to give marching orders to.

[bluriki]

ꪆৎ two days ﹫ lhs

; pair bf!heeseung x fem!reader ; sum all you need is heeseung to tell you he loves you ; genre fluff , f2l , not proofread

it took you two days to realize how much heeseung loved you. he never said it, you deemed it was because you both were friends. best friends at that. best friends weren't supposed to fall in love yet that's what happened.

two days ago heeseung was drying your hair after a shower you desperately needed. it had rained that day and you begged heeseung to come play outside with you. it mightve been then that you realized you loved him too.

heeseung used your blow dryer to dry your hair. his fingers gently ran through your hair softly as the warm air blew against your scalp. he made sure that you hair was all dry before turning the blow dryer off and brushing out the tangles one last time.

he looked so content doing your hair. if someone would've walked in on you they would've thought it was a normal occurrence. they would've been fooled into thinking your six year friendship was something more.

the next day heeseung came over to your apartment, fast food bags in his hand. when you opened the door for him he lifted the bags with a soft smile placed in his face. "hungry?" he asked in a soft tone. of course you were hungry, you'd never skip a meal with heeseung.

that evening had been eventful. giggles faded into the air as heeseung told you his horrible horrible dad jokes. smiles were placed on both your faces that night. you noticed something in heeseungs eyes as he looked at you. was it fondness, affection, or was it all your imagination? you didn't know. you thought you'd never figure it out.

you hadn't seen heeseung today but you were dying to. you had finally figured out his feelings for you. he didn't have to tell you he loved you for you to know he did. it was all so obvious yet you were so blind you missed all the signs.

those days he held you as you cried to some silly drama and screamed at the evil characters, those were the days you wanted to relive with heeseung. but just without the friend title.

you wanted to live those with the lovers title. you wanted everyone to know how much you meant to heeseung and how much he meant to you. you wanted to share the most simplest moments with him.

you wanted to brush your teeth and wash your face before going to bed with him. you wanted to sing karaoke with him in your small living room, giggling as your voice cracks on the high note.

you wanted him to teach you how to dance the most intricate dance just so his body could be pressed to yours and end up slow dancing in the silent evening. you wanted him to know how foolish you were not picking up on his hints. you wanted him to know you loved him.

a soft ring of your phone interrupted your train of thought. you searched for your phone on the couch, finally finding it and looking at the ID.

a smile made its way on your lips as you answered the phone. but it was quickly swiped off when you heard what heeseung said. "can you open the door, i've been knocking for the past five minutes."

immediately you ran to the front door, opening it up just to see the person you wanted to see the most. "hi." he said, a perfect smile laced onto his lips. you smiled before stepping back to let him in.

"what are you doing here?" you didn't think just seeing heeseung would make your heart do flips but i guess you were wrong.

"can i not come see my best friend?" he asked with a smirk on his lips. your face flushed but it all fell down when you registered his last two words.

you just wanted him to ask you out already. you wanted him to pull you in his arms and kiss your forehead.

maybe it was because you had thought long and hard about the fact that he loved you, but you muttered some words you never thought you would say out loud.

"am i just a best friend to you?" okay, that was not good. heeseungs face fell the second you finished your question. you heard him shuffle in front of you, not allowing yourself to look at him.

"what do you mean?" he asked with a shaky voice. you could hear the way his voice shook as he answered you with a question.

"you think of me more than a friend, right?" you noticed the way heeseungs adams apple moved up and down as he gulped. you noticed the way his ears turned a bright red.

"where did you hear that?" he asked with an awkward laugh. you felt your heart stop for a second. he looked nervous and you hated it.

"you can tell me, im not one who would stop being your friend, you know that, right?" heeseung nodded. he looked down and took a deep breath.

"i do... uh i do think of you as more than a friend—" he took another breath before raising his eyes to meet your eyes. "—but i didn't tell you because i thought you'd leave. i can't live without you. you mean way too much to just have you walk out of my life."

you stopped breathing. hearing the words fall from his lips made everything feel real. you took a shaky breath before stepping forward.

"me too." you smiled softly. "i think of you more than a friend. i realized when you dried my hair the other day." you looked down, fingers playing with each other.

"i'd like to try with you." you whispered. you heard heeseung take a breath in. "only if you want." you added, scared of his response. heeseung took your hand in his and stepped forward. "then we should try."

the soft smile on his face spoke millions of words. everything was gonna be okay. you smiled happily and crushed him in big a hug.

🎬 노트 && . i randomly write this last week bc i had nothing better to do, its not the best but i hope you enjoyed bc this writers block is killing me

🧷 perm tl && . send ask or comment to be added

[haesunflower]

petty fights with zb1

genre: slight angst only for hyung line, most are lighthearted

pairing: reader (gn) x all members of zerobaseone

about/tags: what i think reader x zb1 would fight about

warning some have triggers (implied cheating, jealousy and injury), these are mostly lighthearted, not all are established relationship, bullet point reactions, all lowercase is intentional, not proofread, i should have just made this normal and not bullet, I'm lazy

⠀⠀ kim jiwoong ⠀⠀

you always thought you were secure in your relationship

a lot of people swooned over jiwoong but he's been good at reassuring you that you're the only person for him

but lately, he's been busy filming another drama with seobin

and they spend all their free time together, doing lives and filming vlogs for seobin's channel

while some of it is for pr, you know they're really good friends either way

he's a hell of a good actor, you think

because watching his chemistry with seobin, you start to think he's cheating on you

you hope he isn't, but when he comes home one day looking extremely exhausted and as if he just cried – you prayed that you would be wrong

jiwoong kneels in front of you, and has trouble looking you in the eyes

he keeps stuttering, and then just cries

⠀⠀ zhang hao ⠀⠀

when you first started dating, one of the things you worried about was how well hao would get along with your group of friends

they were kinda, well, loud and too much

and you know hao is quite introverted – it's one of the things you love about him. he's calm. you're crazy. that kinda thing.

when you're all together he's usually mostly silent but he engages in conversation. you had assumed that when you all mingle and have your own conversations he holds up on his own.

to your surpise, your best friend let you know that he hasn't made an effort to get to know her even after all these months

that made you mad

the air in the car ride home felt weird. you were at a stoplight when you accusingly said

"do you hate my friends?"

hao just looks at you, and begins to open his mouth but is distracted by the sudden green light

without giving him a chance to think, "hao i've made an effort to be good friends with your members"

hao thinks you're being unfair, because even his partner doesn't understand what it's like to be an introvert

but to some degree you're right, he doesn't try hard enough

unsure of what to say, he nods and continues to drive

you loudly sigh and direct your body towards your window. you know this will have to be a conversation for tomorrow.

⠀⠀ sung hanbin ⠀⠀

hanbin was taking longer than usual again today

you always meet up at the exit of building b of the university when you're both done with your classes, so you could go on a quick cafe date before the sun sets

it's been 30 minutes since he texted "on my way!"

fed up, you head over to his classroom to find him lending his notes to a girl. usually this isn't a problem, but it's who he's lending it to that irks you.

"baby, can we go?"

"oh hi y/n, yeah hold on somi's just finishing up with my notes"

thing is, somi likes your boyfriend, and your boyfriend doesn't see that.

you head over to their table and pick up hanbin's notebook, somi looks shocked she was disrupted

"i'll send you photos of the other pages when we get home"

you shove his notebook in your book bag and start walking away, not giving her an opportunity to respond

when hanbin catches up to your pace he reaches for your hand only for you to swat it away

"stop being so nice to everyone hanbin, they get the wrong idea"

hanbin wanted to defend himself, but he deprioritized that train of thought as he realized you are 100% the jealous type

⠀⠀ seok matthew ⠀⠀

matthew's main descriptor is that he's cute, because he is

but you didn't know that being called cute bothered your boyfriend

"am i not handsome to you?"

"babe, where is this coming from?"

he flashes his phone screen, your recent photoset post from your finsta on display. it featured various pictures of both of you from your dates the week before

the caption he pointed to: "i have the cutest boyfriend in the whole world"

so you deadass thought he was joking

but he really wasn't, he looked real serious -_-

you set the phone down and hugged him, placing your head on his chest

"of course i also think you're the hottest man on the planet"

"much better", matthew finally smiles and you both laugh as he tickles you in revenge

later that night, you posted a few of his gym thirst traps with the caption "my boyfriend is so handsome he should choke me"

his older sister commented: gross. block me next time.

⠀⠀ kim taerae ⠀⠀

so the "fight" started when he texted you that morning with

"y/n look at this, the fans are saying i dress terribly"

"....well"

"well?! well what??"

you ended up not replying because you didn't know how to word it

you loved taerae but those red sweats needed to go

so when you got another text that said "are you really not going to respond to me"

you hit him with a "let's just go shopping today"

even though you hated couple items, it was the only way for taerae to buy the items you wanted for him

he secretly bought a pair of red sweats for you

in the end, he beats the fashion taeraerist allegations (thanks to you)

⠀⠀ ricky ⠀⠀

ever since you started dating, you couldn't recall a time when you were able to pay for your dates

he beats you to it every time...and you feel terrible about it.

ricky extensively spoiled you, and all you wanted was to be given an opportunity to do the same for him

one day you asked him if you could pay for lunch this time around

"no. never. don't worry about stuff like that"

"let me do it just once, please?"

you didn't get your way, and you both walked out of the restaurant slightly annoyed

in fact, you refused to go on any date with him from that point unless you could pay for it

he deadass couldn't get you to come with him on any plan he made for a whole month.

eventually, he showed up at your place and said "fine. for every ten dates you can pay for one"

he wasn't happy with it but at least you were

⠀⠀ kim gyuvin ⠀⠀

gyuvin was the clumsiest person you know

so when he knocked over the vase and cut his hand in an attempt to clean it up, you couldn't help but scream at him in worry for his safety

"gyuvin what are you doing? you shouldn't have touched that!"

you quickly found the first aid kit that his mom kept underneath the bathroom sink

gyuvin had his head down as he applied pressure to the cut

he watched as you worked your way through the supplies

as you gently tended to his wound he tried not to make any sound

"sorry i yelled earlier. i just wish you were more careful. i don't like it when you get hurt"

he looked up to meet your eyes, you were tearing up

it was sorta clouding your vision, so you had to stop what you were doing

"i know y/n, i'm sorry. i'm working on it"

he leaned his head against yours

⠀⠀ park gunwook ⠀⠀

you're both in debate. and you strongly dislike going up against him because 98% of the time you lose.

he likes to win and then gloat about it later

"how's it like to lose for the 3rd time in a row?" (jokingly, you think)

(because you have an inclination that he might have a massive crush on you) (you are correct)

academic rivals to lovers, if you will

when you finally started dating he stopped gloating at least

that doesn't mean he goes easy on you, he tries to give his one hundred percent because so do you

sometimes mid debate he'd catch himself staring at you and get a little distracted

your losing rate has since decreased to about 70% now (thank you puppy gunwook!)

⠀⠀ han yujin ⠀⠀

yujin had issues with sharing way before you started liking each other

maybe it's because he has younger siblings and basically had to share everything with them all his life

so when he shows up to school with a fully packed lunch and extra snacks, and you dare to come up to ask for the pack of pretzels he had, he was hesitant

you did this every monday without fail and he started to get fed up with it

"get your own food will you?"

"i would but it tastes better when it comes from you" you say as you plop down next to him at the courtyard

boy was gobsmacked. from that moment on he was kinda smitten.

i don't know how either that's just how his brain works

from then on, he only shared his snacks with you

except for that one time yena from the upper year said "oh that looks good, can i have some yujinie?" and he gave the whole bag to her.

yeah you guessed it, your pretzel bag.

you were furious

he didn't understand why until you made a snide remark at the end of the day - something along the lines of "yeah you're only nice to older girls"

he bought the giant xl version of the pretzels to school the next day as a sorry

A/N: my friend alexis helped me out with the ideas per member. personally tried to be angsty but most ended up being lighthearted lol. requests are open and you can claim anons too if you'd like hehe

૮ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ა

[jules-ln]

Ok, I've seen too many people bring drama from the bad bad place (Twitter) to the slightly better bad place (tumblr) and at this point my eye is just twitching

So I guess it's time for me to be controversial yet brave again and talk about racism and Jayce

Lemme bring my DEI points out before anything because I guess that what's important with you gringos

I'm Mexican, I was born and raised in Mexico and I've never lived anywhere else but Mexico; I'm brown, my grandfather was an indigenous purepecha man, I don’t identify as indigenous because I don't know anything about the culture, but I do look indigenous and so I've been discriminated because of it, I'm also a trans man

So now, about the racism of making Jayce hypermasculine. I don't think there is any, or at least not a lot that I've seen

Because while yes, that is something that tends to happen with dark skin people in fandom. Jayce doesn't have very dark skin

Now, lemme explain

As someone who is a few shades darker than Jayce; Jayce is light Moreno, Moreno indeed, but light

I was talking the other day with my friend about this, saying that I have the headcanon that because he probably spends all his time inside the lab with Viktor he doesn't tan, so he's pretty much a light Moreno

Why does this matter?

Listen, I know Gringos and Europeans hear people say "Latino" and they immediately imagine brown, it doesn't matter if the Latino in question is the whitest person to ever white (like look at Kevin Alejandro, if I remember correctly, his parents are Mexicans, but my man over there has blue eyes), but in reality, specially in places like Mexico where most of the population could be considered PoC; there's the very big problem of colorism and that plays a role in masculinity

I've seen it every day here in Mexico, where the men who have lighter skin tones are allowed to be more emotional and vulnerable without such harsh consequences and the men with darker skin tones have to be a lot more masculine in a toxic way or they get judged by it

And while I do think that depictions of Jayce within the Fandom suffer from racism, it doesn't show in the same way it would in a character with a darker skin tone; it shows in sexualization and objectification kind of way

Like I've seen many art and posts that make me feel weird as a Latino where gringos make the point that Jayce being Latino is the hot thing about him, like they mention "Oh Viktor likes Jayce because he likes Latinos" and I'm like "how the fuck did you thought of that and didn't find it extremely weird"

Because I'm a Latino, and it's like, "Just for that? You haven't even seen my comic collection"

Or I've also seen MelJay fans (do you think I was going to let you off the hook? No baby, we're calling out eveyoneeee) post things like "I don't really care about Jayce, I just want a dick for Mel smut" how the hell did you think of that and didn't find it racist like, sure let's objectify the Latino man, why don't I just throw myself out of a window arrr arriba y arriba pa adelante Ñ or whatever

And this has a lot to do with colorism, where Jayce is Moreno enough to be "spicy" but not Moreno enough to be "undesirable"

Because people complain a lot about fans making Jayce Hypermasculine, but Jayce does dress and looks traditionally masculine, he has the proportions of a superhero and goes with suits to fight, that is masculine. But I have yet to see somebody making Jayce a typical mexican macho, like most of the time he's vulnerable, emotional, cries, shows his love openly, that isn't something that fits into the category of mexican macho

But you know what character gets the hypermasculinity treatment on top of the adultification treatment? Ekko

That's right, like he's 19 I think, he's still very young, and yet I have seen waaay more fanarts of Jayce being whimsical and having fun than of Ekko

I've also seen like a lot of post calling Jayce cute and almost none of Ekko? C'mon guys Ekko is cute

But, curious curiouser curiousest that this kind of issue only gets brought up with Jayce, a Moreno man that, let's be honest, under the right lighting could pass as a white man with a tan

(And funny that Mel fans only ever bring racism in relation to Mel and let Ekko get the brunt of it, hmmm, I wonder whyyyy)

Also, my hot take about that Tarzan art? I don't think it's racist, like we are talking about the quintessential white savior story where the protagonist gets to be better than than the natives at living in nature and gets all those muscles and locs? The Tarzan story it is racist, but not in the way you are thinking

Besides, hottest take: if you don't find all that art where Jayce gets treated like a dog racist, you shouldn't think of the Tarzan art as racist, just saying

Aaaand, just as the cherry on top? as a trans man, feminine Viktor is such a non issue, like no, it isn't fetishizing trans men, there's not a right way to look like a man or a woman; like what, are you going to start saying that Viktor wouldn't be a trans trender and he would be a trans man in the right™️ way or??

Don't like it? Grow up and learn to block people babyyyy, it's that easy

But yeah, Viktor looked weird in that Tarzan post because his head was way too big, I think that's more a Disney's problem than anything else because that person was tracing over the movie lmao

[cheriecoke]

Can you drop some long series recs (any fandom!)?! I haven't had any come across my dash >.< Would love to read some!

omg of course!! I HAVE SO SO MANY RECS! a lot of the ones i've seen recently are ongoing, but i hope you give them a go & keep watching for updates <3 i have read quite a variety, so hopefully there's something for you tehe. some of them i haven't read yet, but have been on my list bc i enjoy their other works :) so i recommend them to since i know the writers are amazing!!

to have and to hold by @fedyenkas (chuuya, ongoing) - i just started this one today & it's so so amazing so far !! chuuyas characterization in it is sooo yummy. i haven't read a hybrid series before, so it's super unique to see how that fits into the bsd universe.

noble blood by @forest-hashira (satoru & suguru, ongoing) - i haven't read this one yet, but both of fallon's entries for my collab were incredible, so i can only imagine this is too! plus, the premise is SO insane, it's about dragon riders, and there's an entire sheet with all lore that they've created !! i can see how much love and care was put into this one, so i can't wait to check it out !!

oh, baby! by @tetsuskei (kuroo, ongoing) - i have yet to read the first part (everyone throw tomatoes at me) but risu posted some parts on her old blog & i read it there! it's so so sweet!! i looove all her writing, and dad!kuroo is just the cutest thing EVER.

waterloo by @fyorina (dazai, ongoing) - i haven't read this one yet either but i am SO SO incredibly excited to get to it. this one is going to be long, so it might be what you're looking for !! the first two parts are out already, and there's a posting schedule if you want to know when they're coming out :)

bulletproof love by @staryukis (gojo, ongoing) - i've really enjoyed this one so far and logan's writing is so captivating <3 it feels just like missing scenes from in between the canon jjk storyline. logan also has a mini zombie apocalypse series i've been excited to read after reading the other series !! it's dying (for your love).

regrets by @/kingkonoha (levi, complete) is so good !! i still need to finish it, but the concept is super cool & the reader is the antagonist so it's a really interesting spin on levi's actions in the canon universe.

tidal temptations by @fyodorloveclub (fyodor, ongoing) - i have also yet to read this one (cries myself to sleep my tbr is never ending), but everything flora writes is incredible, so i have no doubt this one is too. it's a merman fyodor fic, which is such a cool concept i'm so excited to see where it goes !!!

hell within reach by @/ddarker-dreams (chrollo, complete) - omg. ok i read this one like 2 years ago LOL, but it's finished and its about 80k long, and it's so good <3 i used to be an insane chrollo girlie & this is one of my favorite fics about him.

lover's delight by @lovelyluc (diluc, ongoing) - i don't even play genshin or know anything about it HSHFSDFH but this one is so sweet <3 you can really see how much awea loves diluc in this series, which is my favorite thing about reading fics, and it has so many of my favorite tropes !!

geheinisse by @honeybleed (jean & reiner, ongoing) - only the first part of this is out but it's SO INCREDIBLE. there's so much drama already, and nara does such a great job of setting the scene while getting you hooked immediately. nara also has a two part reiner fic (the first part is decades) that's completed and over 10k words that i'll never forget! her characterization of reiner is so yummy.

if it wasn't for him (would you have me) by @gojoath (yuuta, ongoing) - cella's the ceo of yandere yuuta, so if you're into him, i can't think of anyone else to recommend !!! cella wrote another yuuta series that i think is completed, so there are lots of amazing things to read on her blog <3

@osaemu has a streamer!gojo series that are all in the same universe & connect! they're so funny & everything sabs writes is amazing, so i encourage you to check out her work if you haven't

the lakehouse by @tetzoro (kuroo, ongoing) - rahhh i'm the worst bc i still haven't read this but aims is one of my favorite writers on here, so trust me it's amazing. this was written for october, so if you're missing autumn rn def read this one! aims also has another kuroo series coming soon <3

i know i left some people out, so if you're ever in need of any other recs, pls lmk tehe. and if you're a mootie of mine but have a series i didn't include, send it my way <3 but hopefully all these amazing ones will get you started!

[kpopscatterbrain]

Kdramas i've watched this year

Some of these are older dramas but i'm a procrastinator

Black Knight (2023): Loved this one! I have watched it probably 5 times now. Kim Woobin kicking ass is all i need!

Under the Queen's Umbrella (2022): I didn't watch this when it aired (no idea why). I was worried that the plot would be overrun by romance but thankfully i was wrong. Loved Kim Hye-Soo's performance (i cried a little).

Island seasons 1 & 2 (2022-2023): Honestly i only started this one for Kim Nam-Gil. I loved the cast, but the flow of the plot was a little off (don't know how, i can't put a finger on it). Was positively suprised by Cha Eun-Woo's acting, i think he needs more roles like this! Hot villain alert no.1! Sung Joon as a bad guy is either a blessing or a curse. Cgi could have been better.

Taxi Driver season 2 (2023): Loved the first season so of course i had to watch the second one. Love Lee Je-Hoon. Love the main characters. Love the plot and the message of this drama. A masterpiece. Waiting for season 3.

Weak Hero Class 1 (2022): Only heard of this drama wayyy after it aired (thanks tiktok) and god does it deserve every award there is! I was a bit hesitant because Park Ji-Hoon was the main lead, but boy was i wrong because his talent got me speechless (weren't we all). I cried, i cheered, i shadowboxed, i cried a little more and in the end i called my therapist. Thankfully season 2 is coming.

Bloodhounds (2023): Woo Do-whan and Lee Sang-Yi in the same drama beating people up? Yes please! The plot wasn't mindblowing, but sometimes just simple ass kicking is enough. Bromance was bromancing. Park Sung-Woong with another great villain character.

Revenant (2023): After dropping Mr.Sunshine i wanted to see Kim Tae-ri in other dramas, so when this aired i gave it a go. Her range is phenomenal! I have only seen couple spookier dramas, so i made a mistake and watched this at night (slept with the lights on). The eerie vibes and plot twists were well made. Hong Kyung had great chemistry with Kim Tae-ri and his cop role was refreshing to see after his performance in Weak Hero Class (if you know you know).

Flower of Evil (2020): Okay, this is one of the dramas i procrastinated hard on. It's been sitting on my "have to watch" list since it aired and i'm the only one to blame (i hype up a drama in my mind, then don't want to watch it because now i'm afraid it doesn't go the way i think it does and then i get disappointed blaablaablaa). This year i finally got over myself and why. didn't. i. watch. it. sooner!!!! It is all i ever wanted in a kdrama. 1. serial killers 2. a psychopath (but is he really?) w/ an effed up childhood 3. mindgames 4. marriage problems (but has a lot of soft & cute scenes) 5. Lee Joon-Gi. Also as a plus (hot villain alert no.2) the bad guy is kindaa (i'm sane i swear). I would be lying if i didn't say that i found the wife slightly annoying (might be me, but she went too much back & forth and sometimes i had to take a breather while watching), but all in all this drama will be hard to top and i fell in love with Lee Joon-Gi.

Moving (2023): Honestly one of the best dramas of the year. I don't usually really go for plots that have a lot of romance in them (if you haven't noticed), but i found this one to be really well balanced and the romance scenes weren't "cringy". Although Bong-Seok and Hui-Soo were great and had great chemistry, i looooved the background stories of the parents. Park Hee-Soon also pops up as kind of a non-villain villain. I hope there is a season 2.

Song of the Bandits (2023): Kim Nam-Gil again. 1920s Korea and gunslingers... what more could i need? After Mr. Sunshine left me with a disappointment (this might be an unpopular opinion) i craved for a drama set around the same time period, but with a little less romance (i know, i am defective). I think dramas should explore this time period more, but i understand it might still be a touchy subject. The skills of the cast were obviously great, Kim Nam-Gil killed his role like always, but Lee Ho-Jung as Eon-Nyeon shined with her performance (i am now a new fan). Hot villain alert no.3! I have seen Lee Hyun-Wook in Remarriage & Desires and seeing him as a villain made me feel things. If there isn't a second season i will cry.

The Killing Vote (2023): A "serial killer" in a dog mask making the public vote on punishing criminals and everyone suspects each other? Cyber crime? Chemistry between two cops? Major hot villain (no.4)? Sign me up. I love when crime dramas make you question your people reading skills (i have the tism so i really got none) and have all kinds of theories flying around. I liked that even Kim Mu-Chan and Joo Hyun had obvious chemistry between them it didn't overshadow the main point of the plot. I liked Seo Young-Joo's delivery and i hope he gets more bigger roles. Kim Kwon.... why does the psychopath have to be hot? He also needs more bigger roles. !spoiler! Also Park Sung-Woong killing (heh) yet another morally grey character.

The Worst of Evil (2023): Okay, first of all i have to say... the wife ruined everything (some agree and some don't). We get another bromance duo of the year with Wi Ha-Joon and Ji Chang-Wook. Loved the crime organization infiltration plot, heavily despised the romance plot (sorry Bibi baby). I was constantly on the edge of my seat and the characters started to get so morally grey that in the end everyone needs group therapy. Action scenes were chefs kiss. A honorable mention goes for Lee Shin-Ki as Seo Jong-Ryul (or Chief Seo, knife guy, the man has many names) and Bibi for her performance as Lee Hae-Ryeon.

Evilive (2023): Heavily underrated. Kim Young-Kwang doing what he does best, playing a psychopath. This combined with a bromance plot with the one and only bromance master Shin Ha-Kyun? I'm sold. The dramas literal title "villain story" really sums up the plot. Sometimes you are not sure who to cheer for. Sometimes you are not really sure about your own sanity. But to be fair, so aren't the main characters.

Vigilante (2023): Love it. Currently re-watching it. Needs more attention. Needs more episodes. I'm in love with Nam Joo-Hyuk. The best crime drama of the year, the title is all i needed to hear. Beating up criminals in well made action scenes is my favorite genre. No romance. One sided bromance? Morally grey characters (am i repeating myself now?). Yoon Ji-Tae as a beefy cop and Lee Joon-Hyuk as a slightly insane admirer? If we don't get a season 2 i will start a riot.

[canyousonicme]

Q&A with Alex Kingston, who plays Sheila Bellowes on Steven Moffat's upcoming ITV black comedy, "Douglas Is Cancelled"

(Air date: 27 June, 2024)

What appealed to you about Douglas Is Cancelled?

I'd say what appealed first of all was that the piece was written by Steven Moffat. I would do anything that Steven wrote because he's just such a brilliant writer.

The characters he creates are such a delight to play. I've had that experience of working with him on Doctor Who. It was just a joy to read the script. I laughed out loud. I even cried with laughter in some places. It's so superbly written.

Were you also taken by the idea of playing opposite Hugh?

Absolutely. Oh my gosh, Hugh and I have worked together many times over the years. We go way back to literally when we were teenagers. And so, I was definitely attracted by the opportunity of working with Hugh again. We already have that shorthand between us. That relationship doesn't need even to be acted because we know each other so well and are so comfortable in each other's presence. It's not a new person who I've got to get to know, so that married relationship was already a given. I was thrilled to have the chance to do that.

How would you describe Sheila?

She is amoral, she is ruthless. But I'm assuming that's what the paper wants. I'm also guessing that in the world these sorts of people inhabit, in order to get a good story, they have to be prepared to throw even their best friends under the bus. To be in that position as the editor of a national newspaper, you've got to be not only incredibly ambitious, but also, I would imagine, highly-strung because you are carrying a lot of responsibility on your shoulders. It's just a joy to play somebody who's so on the front foot. Sheila is also really inappropriate. That's what's so great about the script because all the characters behave inappropriately in a world where we're supposed not to anymore. I don't feel like I'm that sort of person at all, which is why it was great fun to play!

How would you summarise the relationship between Sheila and Douglas?

I would definitely say that she wears the trousers in the household. What's so interesting is that they are this high-powered celebrity couple at the start of the story. He is the nation's favourite news broadcaster, and she's this very, very successful editor of a hugely popular newspaper. But I rather like the scene that Steven wrote for them where they are on holiday because that shows a little bit more of who they are as a family before all the stuff hits the fan. They are a unit, and they love each other. But it is an unusual marriage. She is very strong, and he just allows her to be like that. If Douglas was a similar personality to Sheila, the marriage wouldn't ever have lasted. But he just lets her sail on forward, and he's in her slipstream being dragged along.

How does Sheila get on with her daughter?

The relationship she has with her daughter Claudia is much more volatile because her daughter is actually a bit more like Sheila. She's got a bit more fight in her. In a way, Sheila is terrorised by her daughter as she can't hold her daughter down. Also, Sheila doesn't understand young people and all these words like "boomer" that drop out of their mouths. For Sheila, it's just so frustrating. She thinks, "Who is this person we brought into the world who seems like a creature from another planet?"

The drama has lots of very topical things to say about cancel culture.

Yes. It's really interesting because Steven originally conceived this as a stage play several years ago. That's what I found so brilliant and so prescient about it. Steven was working on this way before all the recent scandals involving popular broadcasters. Obviously, cancel culture was already swirling around then, but I feel like Steven has the courage to put the conversation on the table in a way that is super important. But he does it in a darkly comic way, which allows people watching to laugh, but hopefully also to be able to have conversations and ask questions such as, "Where are we going with this? And how dangerous is this becoming?"

What do you hope audiences might take away from Douglas Is Cancelled?

I hope people will be a little bit more thoughtful and a little bit more careful about how they treat people or what they say about people. We need to be more conscious and kinder and aware of other people's feelings and how they wish to be perceived in life. But I think some men of my generation struggle with having to make those changes. I certainly remember sitting in the pub as a young person and hearing jokes about women that were awful. Men would safely say horrendous stuff. But that's just how it was, and you just had to suck it up. But men cannot behave like that anymore. I think there are still elements of our generation that struggle to remember to be a little bit more thoughtful before they say something. That's not out of malice. It's because they're still trying to learn the new rules of the world.

After many years working together on Doctor Who, how did you find it being reunited with Karen?

It was a real joy. It was great just spending time with her. It was very funny because she played my mother in Doctor Who. So it was really lovely to do something different with Karen, and for us both to explore this new relationship together. In Douglas Is Cancelled, there is one big scene that we have together in the toilet. They're these two alpha females who are prowling around each other, and they both absolutely know each other's game.

Did all the cast get to hang out together on set as well?

Yes. When everybody came together for the grand finale, we ended up sitting in the studio control room between scenes, all just chatting, reminiscing, sharing, messing around. Working on Douglas Is Cancelled was just a lovely, lovely, lovely experience.

[rikas-things]

🗣️Rika's Yappfest Hours🗣️

⚠️¡¡WARNING!!⚠️

This post contains light spoilers for Twisted Wonderland Book 7! Read at your OWN RISK

💚💜💚💜💚💜💚💜💚💜💚💜💚

Hello, fellow Twist fans! I just wanted to bring something like this into question since it's been on my mind for a minute since the latest chapter update for Book 7.

I've been seeing a lot of unrest in regards to the pacing and/or additions of the character cards and whatnot and I thought I might want to add my two cents to this.

The biggest questions are what if the addition of the other dream segments were just there for padding/card development? And what if Book 7 ends up with a rushed/unsatisfied ending where Malleus or Idia don't get any spotlight?

For the first question, I think most of the unrest mainly comes from waiting for the next releases of each part. As a long time manga fan, I know the full pain of having to wait for your favorite series to get new content (cries in One Munch Man ꈨຶ⁠ ⁠˙̫̮⁠ ⁠ꈨຶ) and I'm sure you guys know that whole song and dance too.

A LOT of the comedic stuff can be annoying when all you wanna do is get to the juicy ✨drama✨ but I'm willing to bet had the part been done all the way through like the other books, they wouldn't have stung as hard.

Upon replaying certain parts (and fights) the pacing didn't come off as painful and I'm sure, again, once the part is over, we'll all have a great memory of it.

And as for the later, I think only time will tell. I think, with the wait time of each piece being the way that it is, that I doubt Yana and the writers would willingly put subpar chapters given how they want to tie everything together, themes and such included.

Asides

This is even more of my ramblings, things that aren't necessaryly related to the main talking points above. Can't you tell I wrote this late at night? 🤪

*Speaking of the dream segments, I remember there was some mention of how stuff like Savanaclaw Rook and Kalim's school could have been vignettes and on hindsight I'm just wondering...how could these be vignettes?

I only say this bc of the fact that the dream segments are supposed to be desires/thoughts of the people in the dreams, and I doubt the Twist team would want to make an entire vignette on something that was essentially a flashback.

They probably wanted to answer the burning questions of what Rook looked like before he transferred, or like, in Kalim's case, they wanted to tie up any loose ends that were not addressed in the earlier chapters.

Let's be honest: aside from Riddle and Idia, everyone's (the Overblotters) trauma didn't really get handled with a lot of the seriousness it should have been- or at least, there was a lot swept under the rug, and I think the dream segments could be a means to really explore the inner mechanics of the characters as well as how they plan to handle that trauma from here moving forward.

*"How was Silver able to keep using his magic without overblotting or building up blot?" ...I actually have a theory about this. Remember what Lilia said while confronting Malleus?

This would explain why many others can use their magic so freely, Silver included. Bc the dream world makes it so that the bodies of the hosts aren't affected apart from being put to sleep. I mean, it would be pretty lame if you're in a dream world and you could only do so much due to your magic not being the best, right? But what do you think?

That's all I gotta say for now. Think I'm wrong? Or maybe you agree with me? I'd like to discuss it. Thank you and bye bye!

[zhuoyichenpretty]

ep 24 commentary (brain fried edition)

my head is a little empty after ep 24 tbh!! brain is not braining after all the zyc hurt no comfort (-:

some scattered thoughts here and there, painstakingly corralled like cats out of my vacuous brain and into a list (spoilers):

ZYZ is really emo this episode poor dude like he is having a hard time keeping it together it seems. Every other word out of his mouth is depressing as shit, which is saying a lot considering how depressing he usually is already (': I kind of wanted this episode to pick his brain more, give him room to emote in the aftermath of all that. But it almost feels like the character refuses to be alone, like he might spiral if he has too much time to get in his own head. I'm still so curious to know, though, what he thinks about the state of their promise in light of how far ZYC went trying to save him. “He has us,” ZYZ said to WX. When the time comes, I wonder how he'll reconcile that with what he’s asked of ZYC.

PSJ and Ying Lei bonding! shenanigans! I did laugh thank you guys. Also, not that the team didn't operate separately before, but I really get a sense of how much ZYC held things together with how apparent his absence is. It's obvs heartwarming seeing how hard everyone is working to save him (PSJ especially for me bc I love their mutual tacit trust and respect and all the ways they're alike and different), but ultimately it's still so angsty (':

Kind of love the couple instances where ZYC has been referred to as fragile/weak/of delicate constitution (depending on how you wanna translate it) like that's a very interesting quality to assign to basically the tank of your team. Even if the comments are made facetiously, it just reminds me of how often we witness his mortality, and of course how everything about the styling, aesthetics, and content of the flashbacks to his childhood reinforce a characterization of vulnerability at the very heart of him. I saw someone mention how the Cloud Light Sword responded to ZYC's tears and to that vulnerability rather than brute strength, and I totally agree. I love how this "fragile" characterization plays into the whole fate weapon deal. ZYC's strength is (imo) unconventional, and it is his sensitivity, his compassion, and his deep capacity to feel that the sword acknowledges, resonates with, and empowers. Almost like it protects his tender heart rather than making it something he needs to overcome to get stronger.

One thing I will never get over is how incredibly they styled TJR as baby!Yichen, adult ZYC, and Bingyi. What do you mean this is all from one drama and not three separate productions. Insane. I'm out of my mind with how gorgeous every change in costuming is.

A tangential note is I've seen people mention (paraphrasing very much here) ZYZ's demon form being nicely subtle in its eerie inhumanity and tbh I have a similar feeling even just about human adult ZYC imo. Especially when his hair is down and he's got that thick eyeliner on and we get a close up of his contacts, if you told me from the start that he's half-demon half-human or something I'd believe it. Along the same vein, baby!Yichen reads completely human to me, and Bingyi of course completely demon. Something something the Cloud Light Sword bridges the gap something. This point is unintelligible and not narratively based but I had to make it because I've been thinking "wow ZYC elven" for days now.

Saw a tag about yuanyi getting us through some dark times but man they are PUTTING me through some dark times rn help?/

Been trying to put off talking about the baby Yichen scenes because wow I cried immediately. Well, no, I was like "yay! I love seeing baby Yichen!" and then they crushed me into demon dust lol. And then WX had to tell that absolutely precious story about when she got sick and ZYZ had to go like "actually ZYC was probably lonely as fuck" and yeah that's fine I didn't need my heart anyway.

Ending on this point so I can put a pretty screencap here: There is so much gravity to just the short scene of Bingyi removing his mask and dropping to his knees with that anguished and fatigued expression. TJR's acting is the gift that keeps on giving (me angst).

so sorry if anything here didn't make sense, i currently have the same thousand-mile-stare as Bingyi the more i think about how this all might end and how long I'm gonna have to wait to find out.

[teadragondreams]

Thoughts on Nicole Maine's Secret Six (Organized [kinda])

Now that I've done some preliminary information gathering from stalking the appropriate tags and wiki articles, here are my thoughts on each member of the new Secret Six lineup! Keep in mind that I barely read the greater DC comics whatsoever.

Jay Nakamura (Gossamer)

Positive Asian representation in the Secret Six!? FUCKING FINALLY--Mostly with him and the other new members I'm anticipating some sort of soap opera style drama happening alongside the main plot-- and that isn't a detriment, it would be an active bonus.

Jon Kent

From what I've seen, much in the style of Dick Grayson temporarily taking on the Batman mantle, Jon *was* Superman for a while. Does he have a hero name specific to him or is he Superboy again? How many Superboys are there actually? (From what I've seen it seems to be just as complicated at the Batfamily-- but GOD am I SICK of the batfamily--) Anyway. I doubt they're going to have any continuity with the 2011 timeline but just imagining the interactions he could have with Black Alice or Catman if so--"Hey weren't you guys teammates with that guy that shattered my Dad's bones?!"

Dreamer (Nia Nal)

Read a part of that scene she has with Waller (I believe it was from Dream Team but not sure on that), but the fact that she actively scrambled Waller's memories and now this new series is in the aftermath of that ? Whoo boy is going to be fun! Especially becausefrom what I've gathered--Nicole Maines *is* Nia Nal, and probably has a clear direction with where she wants to take the character, right?

Black Alice (Lori Zechlin)

I love Lori! She's always been one of my favorites, especially because she is always accidently pushing the found family agenda with other members of the six. I know she'd made a few appearances around in other series like Suicide Squad and Night Force, and that's where her newer design comes from. But there are so many directions her characterization might go in this series that I'm just praying she doesn't get shoehorned into 'annoying kid member of team' because she's so much more than that! More of that "I feel tremendous guilt about possibly giving my dad cancer and purposely joined a team of mercenaries".

Catman (Thomas Blake)

Gotta love the Tomcat. I love how his design skews him back into "batman impersonator" but gets rid of that stupid hole in his cowl for a bang they gave him in DC Pride. I liked that story with him and Ghostmaker but I couldn't get over that stupid bang!! Addtionaly because he has so much internal conflict about what the hell he wants to do with his career as a mercenary/anti-hero/vigilante. His underlying attempts to be *good* to be *better* makes me glad to follow what he does. But honestly, I'd be even more glad if he was more of a supporting role in this mini-series, because his presence as a father/older brother figure (mainly seen in the 2011 run) are just incredible. Also I hope they don't make him the butt of too many eg(g)regious jokes.

Deadshot (Floyd Lawton)

Twenty bucks says they'll be at least 3 panels with him and Thomas in the hit or kiss zone. Wouldn't have it any other way.

Honorable mention section for that one issue cover that shows some of the previous members of the Six.

Bane

HOLY SHIT IT'S BANE!!! I literally almost cried in joy when that one Christmas special issue came out at the very moment I was like "I need to calm down with my Secret Six obsession it's not like there's ever going to be any new official material with them" and now boom. making this post. Super excited to see the big guy on a team again.

Scandal & Knockout

RETURN OF THE POLYCULE??? Not much to say here, I'll lament Scandal once again not being on the team proper, but I guess they've ditched that "all eight of us in this commercial are apart of the Secret Six" idea and are keeping the team to actually Six.

Jeanette

So happy to have you back queen, wish it was you on the front lines instead of your crusty little bf but understandable. I hope it's brought up again that she's like a majorly successful entrepreneur because it's so funny that she chooses to associate with these weirdos.

Chesire

I hugely disliked how Cheshire was treated in the OG Villains United Run. I'm fine with her being an antagonist, Jade could be a great antagonist!-- but I sincerely hope they avoid the stereotypes used to previously characterize her.

Ragdoll

I love this little freak! I am one of the (2.5)frequenters of the peter merkel jr tag. As long as A) the stupid little clown ruff remains and B) they let her be as much of a weirdo as possible, I will probably not have *too* many complaints.

Mad Hatter

peter merkel jr for the second time in your life you have the opportunity to do the funniest thing ever.

[manicplank]

I know this question’s weird but can we get some crying headcanons? Like how they act or sound when they cry?

Not weird at all!

CRYING HEADCANONS

Peppino: Cries often. Maybe not daily, but a few times a week. He either cries silently with a few sniffles or full-on wails. Cries over the pizzeria a lot. Depressed man. Sad man.

Gus: Doesn't cry too often, he's a happy guy. Cries happy tears at events like weddings. When he does cry out of sadness, he doesn't make much noise.

BONUS Brick: Crybaby when he wants something that Gus won't give him. Squeaks long and loud.

Mr. Stick: I imagine he sounds like Squidward when he cries. Hardly ever cries, but when he does, it's like this. (Sorry.)

Pepperman: Happy cries at his own art quite often. Very proud of himself. Otherwise, doesn't cry too often. When he does cry, he's pretty quiet. Doesn't cry in front of people unless it's about art.

The Vigilante: Secretly a crybaby. Happy cries and sad cries. I've said this before, but he cries every time a calf is born on the farm. Cried when his grandpa died, still mourns him every now n then. Never cries in front of anyone. Cried when he was beaten by Peppino. Cried when Snotty died. Sounds like an old man when he cries.

The Noise: Also secretly a crybaby. Has meltdowns that start as anger and end up with him sobbing. Cries silently until everybody is gone, and then he WAILS. Likes to be held when crying but won't admit it. Needs to be reminded to breathe or else he accidentally holds his breath. Doesn't cry too often but still cries more than usual.

Noisette: Either cries quietly or screams. No in between. Will cry at small things. Cries when someone else cries. Cries over the fact that raccoons live outside when it rains. Cries at wholesome pet videos. Will sometimes fake cry to get her way. "W-What do you mean I can't have your credit card and *sniffs* buy *sniff sniffle* clothes? PLEA-HE-HE-HEEEESSS WAAAAA! (given the credit card, she stops crying) YAAAAAY!"

Fake Peppino: WAILS. SCREAMS. Cries when he's yelled at. Cries when he doesn't get his way. Cries loud enough to echo through the whole tower. Will throw an entire tantrum because he's not allowed to bite people.

Pizzahead: DRAMA QUEEN. Doesn't cry too often. If you call him old, he'll sob. Will cry sometimes out of anger or frustration. Would much rather cry than get angry. Tries not to cry in front of people, but it happens.

John: Pretty stoic. Hardly ever cries. Has cried over his situation in the tower maybe once, and that's it. Might sniffle as a few tears fall down his face.

Gerome. Also super stoic. Almost never cries. Actually wishes he could cry more often, especially over his situation with John in the tower.

[hcneygemini]

𝖝. 𝖆. 𝖓. 𝖆. — lyrics sentence starters.

A collection of sentence starters from some singles released, minus anything featured in Tantrums ( the meme featuring those is here ). Do not add to or steal this meme. Feel free to change pronouns, edits phrasing, or generally slightly edit or combine lines as needed. Some lines have already been slightly rephrased for rp purposes. tw: cheating, toxic relationships, suggestive

MONSTER

i hold your mistakes high over your head, especially when they look like mine.

i'm not one to hand out forgiveness.

it pains me to admit you were right.

someday i will be someone you resent.

honey, the pleasure is all mine.

i heard you're calling me a traitor.

i owe you a good apology, i'll do it later.

i paint myself the good guy.

i heard you're calling me a monster.

after all the shit i pulled, you could do better.

i'll do what i want over what's right.

you gave me your all.

it was intimate.

i guess it ain't your fault that i can't commit.

i never listen.

i couldn't help but feel so indifferent.

all my failures are visceral.

i still taste blood from years ago.

you ain't good enough.

i can't even be honest with myself.

how could you believe i'd do that for someone else?

i don't want that life.

i'm kissing boys in the back of their cars.

it's half past 3.

you were fast asleep while i was on the phone with [ Jodie ].

will i ever know why i am like this?

i go for what i can't have, like i'm righteous.

i can't face the shame.

if you wanna place blame, just say my name.

i go home alone and i think it's strange.

i got what i want but it don't taste the same.

everyone who's ever loved me is the enemy.

i get high on all the jealousy.

you can't forgive the infidelity.

i don't wanna be someone who lives like that.

i was supposed to be a good friend, trusted.

i snuck around with the love of your life.

after all the shit i pulled, you should do better.

HOMEWRECKING ERA

wrap your thighs around me.

i could keep all your secrets.

cross my heart and hope i mean it.

think of all the damage i could do.

say less.

push me on the counter.

call me princess.

wish i could say no, but it's hopeless.

i'm losing focus.

i wonder if [ she ] knows about those pictures on your phone.

you should feel guilty, but you don't.

i'm in my homewrecking era.

got things i wanna do to you.

i feel bad for a minute.

you make me feel so good.

i taste something bitter in my mouth.

i left my bralette on the ground.

i can't help myself.

nobody fucks like me.

i'm the [ girl ] of your dirty dreams

the silence is deafening.

do you miss me?

i think [ she ] can taste me.

i can give you what you want.

we called it love.

we might've fucked it up.

baby, just fuck me up.

i'm the flame that keeps you warm at night.

don't i bring out the green in her eyes?

you like how pretty [ she ] is when [ she ] cries.

[ she ] loves you so much, even the lies.

we're both the one, but never the only.

you get so lonely

crown me the villain and hero tonight.

fucking me brought you together so nice.

i got a taste for the drama.

i spilled your guts 'cause i wanted.

look at all this damage that i do.

BETTER KIND OF BEST FRIEND

i can see [ her ] in my dreams.

i see [ her ] in my bed.

[ she's ] the goddamn vision that ringin' in my head.

i'm waitin', patient.

we could be good together.

let me release the pressure.

i think i found my treasure.

[ she ] tastes like heaven and she knows it.

i'm eager.

i just wanna please you.

she's got me prayin'.

i could be a better kind of best friend.

i'm a fan.

i don't die for my [ women ] anymore.

i'll do anything to have you.

i swear to be true.

i don't die for my [ women ] anymore, i kill for them.

you don't need to ask, you got my permission.

lord knows we tried.

can't stay away from each other.

you know i'm a sucker.

watch as i swallow my pride.

i wanna make it intimate.

i've got my finger on the trigger.

they come and go.

YOU DON'T WANT ME LIKE THAT ( also by Rachel Bochner )

if you hated me it'd be easier.

i know what's coming is really gonna hurt.

if i hated you, i would've never tried.

it's a habit you conditioned.

i wonder if you know you're bad.

i wanna tell you that i miss you.

you wouldn't say it back.

you don't want me like that.

you don't want a picture of me sitting on your nightstand.

you don't wanna touch me in the way we both know you can.

you just like the way i feel stuck in the palm of your hand.

where do you get off on it?

i do the extra credit but you're never satisfied.

i keep you center stage.

you keep me on the side.

i'm crossing all the lines.

you won't call it what it is.

you just call me when you're blue.

the fantasy is cute.

i would give you all i have.

i stay up waiting for you.

i can't keep waiting.

BABYBLUE

baby blue was always your color.

it's a little strange how we're seeing each other.

god, you look just as i remembered.

it's been a few years.

i've known you forever.

you packed your bags and moved to [ Boston. ]

you needed a place that you could get lost in.

time will tell.

you got my youth on your bedpost.

say it ain't so.

our picture's getting dusty.

you smell vanilla and don't think about me.

i hope it's alright, your life without me.

you ran to my house in the pouring rain.

i've cried every damn day since you left.

i don't mind if i never get over it.

i've been watching reruns.

i should call my little sister, i worry about her all the time.

you hold other hands.

i'm biting my tongue.

you're making new plans.

i'm coming undone.

i watch your old films.

looking at it now, i think i love you still.

i try to be cool.

if i never say a word, does it make it less true?

i feel the time go.

i fear the unknown.

it's getting so old.

all of my anxieties are filling up my diaries.

the water ran cold.

there's so much i don't know.

i think i gotta go.

you see green and don't think about me.

BAD BANDIT

i've been lonely for awhile now.

i'm tired of this ghost town.

[ she ] looks pretty on [ her ] poster.

i'm thinking i could hold [ her ].

i want you on my body.

won't you face it?

you wanna make or break it.

you wanna feel me naked.

i'll show you how to take it.

count your blessings when the devil ain't got nowhere to go.

maybe i'm bratty.

i taught that [ man ] a lesson.

[ he ] was charming and i loved [ him ].

[ his ] urges were disgusting.

i bed [ him ] down to nothing.

that little [ lady ] wanted love.

it's such a damn shame.

you better run, babe.

[ she's ] taking aim.

[ she ] promised me [ her ] best.

i could see forever in [ her ] golden eyes.

my baby told me lies.

i swear i'm gonna die.

but i ain't the one biting the dust tonight.

i swear i'm gonna miss [ her ] for the rest of my days.

i still hear [ her ] voice.

BET YOU'LL GET OFF ON THIS

maybe in another year you might be different.

i'd rather not admit how many years i've been insisting.

you showed me your true colors.

you used to be the prettiest thing i'd ever seen.

what you said to me last sunday was disgusting.

i don't need to look at you to know you feel nothing.

you feel nothing.

maybe you like it better when i'm cool.

i don't give a shit.

did you really have to be so cruel?

all i ever did was try to love you.

i don't know who you are.

i saw the façade slip, and it was alarming.

i'm left with confusion.

how did you not ever learn to be human?

what did i expect?

you never grew up.

you think you're so deep, but you're so out of touch.

[ Natalie ] was right when [ she ] said that you were heartless.

i don't ever want you to touch me again.

i really can't stand the way you talk about your [ girlfriend ].

bet it hurts to know i'm no longer your forever.

i won't hold my breath, but i hope you get better.

i don't wanna belittle my love.

all we ever did was try to love you.

[barely-coherent]

Seduce Me Bros Trying The Period Pain Simulator

This has been my hyperfixation for over a week and I doubt it's gonna stop but also my body is mad I'm not pregnant so... Here, I guess.

James

I feel like he knows

He knows it's gonna hurt

But he has this sick sense of satisfaction

Knowing he can probably do better than his brothers

But he gets like 3 levels in and he's gritting his teeth and doing those really dramatic breaths

Save him

"I've read plenty, I'm sure this isn't as bad as it seem- ... I take back everything I just said. Dear, please, sweetheart, my love, no, I can't."

Erik

He probably tries to play it off

"Oh? Didn't take you to be one for pain, princess."

And then he's like curled in on himself

He does those like "I'm so sorry for every woman I've ever looked at" monologs

"This will be interestiNG!! Princess, I am so sorry that I ever doubted, oh God, any woman ever... They have to go through this... Every month?"

Sam

He's absolutely been laughing at his brothers

"It can't be that bad, drama queens. 10, immediately, I can take it."

He immediately regrets everything

Every choice he's ever made

He's doing that thing where he punches whatevers closest to him

He accidentally breaks a couple door frames on accident

Don't let him go to the roof unless you want your ceiling to cave in

"C'mon, level 10 immediately, I got this. OH MY- Holy shit, it's this bad? I'm gonna lose my fucking mind... WHAT DO YOU MEAN THIS IS ONLY LEVEL 5?"

Matthew

Seeing Sam had him scared

He and Sam would bicker a lot but he knew Sam

He wouldn't react like that unless it was bad bad

He looks at you like "Please, I'm so sorry, please don't do this to me."

But just as you put the thing on he's already like "No, it hurts"

"It's not even turned on yet"

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN"

You turn it on and immediately he's like "Every month?"

Bro probably tears up a little

He understands how you're able to handle Simon now

This is so much worse

"Oh no, please, it hurts... It's not even on? Why does it hurt already? OH SWEET MOTHER OF- And you feel this every month?"

Damien

I want to say he would be like "Anyway, I'm gonna be busy all day so you have fun"

And you're like "Read my mind again, I dare you. You're not getting out of this."

And he winces at each and every one of his brothers reactions

"Ready?"

"No"

"Good. Neither is anyone when it's the real deal."

You turn it on and he's just silent

He's probably the type to do that like hiding the pain via singing thing

Like the "Oh my god 🎶 This is so terrible 🎵 I have so much respect for you 🎶"

Let's be real, he probably cries

"I'm sorry for doing anything, don't do this to mE- Oh, God, hmm. Nope, no, I'm good, I understand. Please!"

-

They all probably get a tracker for you and stock the house with chocolate in the days leading up. Their wives also thank you when they find out why they know so much.

[theerurishipper]

Hi~ Hope you have a lovely day. I want to get your opinions on my rant lol and ask.

Marinette is such a disappointment of a lead female character in a western magical girl cartoon. She isn't a good leader and all her team consist of yes men and women and sidekick Chat Noir where her real partner Alya is standing over to the side. I liked her in the first two season and maybe some in s3 but the s4 and onward just got to me ngl. It's her world and we're all just living in it. Miraculous is so weird when it comes to team dynamics because I get she's guardian but I really wished it were someone else and not her because she chooses people she already get along great with. It fun for team dynamics to add be different and broader.

The whole she's just 14 the fandom spouts only goes so far how many messes do you do until you realise you need to own up to them even at that age when you should know better on your conduct ?

I get it hard to communicate but onwards I always thought the bigger of the two in the conflict was her because of her secrecy and her controlling tendencies. I disliked it so much in the ephemeral episode and her betraying her partner disgusted me. Sorry to those who like or defend her character this much but I can't stan or like a character that does this much crap to a friend let alone a love interest and then gloss over or minimize it and not be called out for it. Like, are people standards that low they think she's a good leader or a good proper representation on feminism when this show reeks of misogyny and misandry. She's the ultimatum voice for Astruc.

A communication issue with her Chat was fine a long time ago but now in s5 she crossed it hell nah how do people still support a ship with her knowing she followed Hawkmoth command for Adrien. I literally can't anymore with this show. Every guy she likes gotta be so 100 percent in effort and like in the Shadybug special him always comforting her makes me so jaded whenever she cries what about a change in dynamics had we ever seen her comfort him in turn how are people invested in this ship? Like that time in the bench and she just thought of ways to woo or give presents instead of just comforting him is so sad to watch.

She really followed in Master Fu steps. The bar is in hell and she crossed it in the finale. There is no excuse no handwaving it away and i know in my heart they gonna minimize it for Adrien own good. Everything is for his own good huh? What good is it rooting for a ship that just reeks of pity points. Like, she was never my favorite but who knew 8 years ago she'd pull a stunt like this and people bending over and doing mental gymnastics to rationalise this insanity. She really is a good foil to Gabriel ironically to bad she has no sway in this family drama we call the Agreste.

I know she has good intentions and it's not wrong for her to wish to save her prince but like thats all that is intention. Her actions are also important and the effects she's done is so bad that if she weren't the Main character and we haven't spent the chunk of the majority in her pov alone she'd be disliked.

I feel like compared to other respective series Winx Club s1-3 Bloom, Danny Phantom, Ben 10, Totally Spies they have it much more harder and so many more all show the consequences of your actions and how you do them right and they're her age. I feel like whenever someone bring up consequences it's like people in this particular fandom think we do it to punish Marinette but no I just never ever saw it properly done in this show because she's very coddled in the narrative. I don't see other MC as coddled as her before in a show where when they MESS UP it's actually integral and important.

Rant over.

You encapsulated all my thoughts perfectly, anon. I've said so many times before that I loved Marinette from Season 1-3 and even during Season 4 as it aired. What made me fall out of love with her character post Season 4 was the utter lack of acknowledgement of her actions and the insistence in portraying her as in the right at all times. Like you said, it's not just your intentions that matter. Your actions and the effects that they have on the people around you also matter. The writers don't seem to understand this, and it hits Marinette's character worst of all. She had so much potential to be such a great character, which is why I feel so sad seeing just how badly the writing failed her. Marinette deserved better.

Thank you for your ask!

[noblechaton]

my father's gone. tw for uh. death, I guess

I say my father but like. he was my dad, for sure. a complex simple person, I'd say. he was blunt to a fault, kinda....constantly aloof, but he wore it well. he was a people person, light of the room, always the funny guy. I feel I get a lot of my humor from him, and I've always been quite proud of that. maybe he didn't know how to be personable all that well, said the wrong thing at the wrong time here and there, maybe he was bad at keeping secrets - one time he told the school I'd texted home when we weren't meant to even have phones lmao - and maybe he wasn't the best at showing how he cared

but he did care. I know he cared, my family knows it. there were rough patches, bickering and fights, and he had this indominable surface to him, never showed any sort of pain or fear or frustration unless it truly got to him. even with this latest incident, he'd insisted he was fine despite how obvious it was that he. wasn't. I find myself wishing I'd pressed more, been more convincing, as if somehow I could have gotten the stubborn old mule to relent sooner than he did, if maybe that'd made a difference

but I can't change what's happened, despite my own rage

and really, I feel I'm kinda....lucky, I guess, that I can't say much bad about him. he was so far from some horrible person. did he have his failings? sure. we all do. but he supported me no matter what, never put up any restrictions or stopped me from at least trying to pursue what I wanted to do, always encouraging no matter how gently. he was there for me when I needed strength or a laugh, was this independent rock that I - and everyone he knew - could lean on as they needed.

he wasn't great at expressing his feelings, or helping with the feelings of others, not the most sensual guy around, but he was there. always there with some quick joke or a funny face to lighten the mood, always willing to do whatever it took for anyone he knew, constantly sought out ways of helping others, total strangers, be it giving their cars a jump on the side of the road or simply picking something up for them. he instilled a lot more into me than I think he knew, I credit him a lot for both my sense of humor and my sense of conscience.

he had his issues, nobody's perfect, but he always tried to be as best as he could, and it almost always worked. he was just. a good man, who'd always help someone out when they asked, that was there even if he wasn't fully present, y'know? like, he'd sit with me and watch Power Rangers, or some silly drama show, not because he was invested in Heroes or whatever I'd wanted to watch, but just because I'd asked. and so effortlessly funny and warm hearted, always the brightest smile in any given room, so eager to make someone, anyone laugh. even when the joke was on him, it never felt like it

there's so much I find myself wishing I'd have done or said, both as if I could have changed this outcome and in general. we never really told each other we loved one another all that much, not verbally, but I feel we both knew it all the same. we loved to tease and joke with each other, I loved surprising him with oldies I'd play on the radio he felt I shouldn't know, and the games we'd play over him having me guess what movie he was watching. and when a miracle of a sort came through this past Summer, he accepted a hug for the first time in ages, and I held him as he showed just a glimmer behind his tough exterior, as he cried, just briefly, on my shoulder from joy

so. again. a complex yet simple man, I think that kinda fits him pretty perfectly. the exact kind of person you'd want in your corner, someone who was beside you no matter what. maybe he wasn't the most outward person, but he was very much outgoing, the heart of any given room he entered, so constantly supportive and understanding even when he didn't, couldn't truly understand, so dependable and devoted, so caring in his own ways

he was my friend, and he was my dad, and I think I'll always miss him