#you might go ‘talon he just looks similar bc it’s the same guy’

[dudefromtheooze]

anyway i stand by the idea that the reason why future leo looks Way too much like his teen self was to make the point that the bad future leo is still the same person he was when he was 16 because he never had the chance to grow to his full potential due to the apocalypse turning his focus entirely to just Surviving, and the new future leo will actually look quite a Lot different than he did in the bad future

[saltymongoose]

Hey Salty! I made a Birb AU for yer SAM:PN

Basically, the Player who's also a bird handler for a wildlife sanctuary happened to get into a situation where the bois turned into Birbs for who knows how long.

They pretty much constantly wear their protective bird gear as to not get clawed in by the bois who constantly try to perch somewhere on Reader, with Hank as the biggest offender.

As for reasons the kind of birbs they are;

Hank's a Harpy Eagle cause of how they're really strong and big, being known as one of the strongest birds of prey on earth.

Sanford and 2BDamned are both owls bc of their canonically similar body builds.

Sanford being a Snowy Owl cause of how they square up and win against many different opponents. Snowy Owls can and will pretty much fight against animals bigger than them.

2BDamned being a Great Horned Owl being similar to Sanford. Stronk bois and their whole vibe of being intelligent and shit. It just fits him really.

Deimos as a Peregrine Falcon cause of him being a quick lil guy yet still dangerously good at his whole killing thing yanno?

Sorry if this doesn't make much sense lol. Not the best at describing things the way I wann'em too

(Harpy Eagles are so hard to draw. Also, sorry if Deimos is a lil too bright. I'll likely try to fix it later)

Omg! This is fantastic, I absolutely love it. <33333 You were spot on with your analysis of which bird they should be, with how Sanford and 2B would be owls because of their similar body builds while Dei is a peregrine falcon because of his speed. Hank being a Harpy Eagle is just such a good idea too, considering their size and how they excel at hunting.

This drawing is also really cute too, especially since you included their masks and other unique details. They're honestly just really adorable, even if their constant attempts to perch on you could get a little annoying. I can definitely tell why the Player had to use special protective gear since I don't think having four large birds of prey on you would be very light haha.

Speaking of the Player, while I'm not sure how the boys would end up as birds, it certainly wouldn't stop their attempts to "cuddle" with you. If anything, it just might make them do it more; it's not like Doc can do any work without hands, and the boys probably aren't effective at their missions like this (unless we're talking recon, cause who'd suspect a bird of spying on them). So now you have to deal with four huge birds attempting to take your attention, usually by perching on your arms and shoulders or barrelling into your lap so you can pet them. I can also see them attempting to impress you by flying and doing some tricks they figure out (mainly Deimos, but Hank definitely isn't opposed to doing the same).

(Although, they probably wouldn't have the best grasp of flying once they're first turned. Watching them crash goes from funny to horrifying real quickly once you realize just how brittle their now-hollow bones are. Luckily for you, they're quite sturdy, but it's not like they're unwilling to play up any injuries they might get just to feel you touching them and have you looking them over for longer.)

Also, I can see them just randomly attacking grunts if you have to go out (to get them food, no doubt) and someone is stupid enough to get in your way. Like imagine just being an agent and trying to capture this target the Auditor apparently needs back, only to be swarmed by four birds; having their talons claw into you as they peck at your visual cross and screech at you. And then having to explain to your supervisor why you're covered in so many bloody scratches and without the "Player."

You'd also probably have to explain to Jebus what happened because I think he'd probably be furious to find you without anybody for protection if he visits one day. He'd understand at the look of the odd birds who hang around you though, but you might have to stop Hank from trying to mess with him once he gets too close to your personal bubble. (And don't even get me started on Tricky; it's hard to kill him as a grunt, but Hank's not above trying even if he's not one anymore.)