#you exist too much

[fairycosmos]

you exist too much by zaina arafat

[queerliblib]

Queer reads for Ramadan? We’ve got you covered!

[smokefalls]

You’ll find that having someone who has a claim on you, and who you can claim, it’s one of the greater things in life.

Zaina Arafat, You Exist Too Much

[treesofreverie]

Being regularly excluded, I developed a preference for solitude, one that I wasn't so ready to exchange for the incessant company of complete strangers.

You Exist Too Much by Zaina Arafat

[houseofpurplestars]

"...only a white man would feel comfortable taking up so much space."

- from "You Exist Too Much" by Zaina Arafat

[aroaessidhe]

2023 reads / storygraph

You Exist Too Much

literary fiction

follows a bisexual Palestinian-American woman with self-destructive tendencies who struggles with becoming obsessively in love with people

she goes to a treatment centre claiming to be able to fix her ‘love addiction’, making her reflect on her life and why she is the way she is, through flashbacks of her childhood, past relationships, and relationship with her mother

[pesbianlanic]

december 2023 reading

books in bold are especially recommended!

i didn’t read very much this month. lol. i finished the year with 79 books read.

You Exist Too Much by Zaina Arafat - 4.5/5. beautifully written exploration of a desire, love, and family trauma. both the main character and author are queer and Palestinian American.

[qbdatabase]

On a hot day in Bethlehem, a 12-year-old Palestinian-American girl is yelled at by a group of men outside the Church of the Nativity. She has exposed her legs in a biblical city, an act they deem forbidden, and their judgement will echo on through her adolescence. When our narrator finally admits to her mother that she is queer, her mother’s response only intensifies a sense of shame: “You exist too much,” she tells her daughter.

Told in vignettes that flash between the U.S. and the Middle East–from New York to Jordan, Lebanon, and Palestine–Zaina Arafat’s debut novel traces her protagonist’s progress from blushing teen to sought-after DJ and aspiring writer. In Brooklyn, she moves into an apartment with her first serious girlfriend and tries to content herself with their comfortable relationship. But soon her longings, so closely hidden during her teenage years, explode out into reckless romantic encounters and obsessions with other people. Her desire to thwart her own destructive impulses will eventually lead her to The Ledge, an unconventional treatment center that identifies her affliction as “love addiction.” In this strange, enclosed society she will start to consider the unnerving similarities between her own internal traumas and divisions and those of the places that have formed her.

[podcastwizard]

because here's the thing here's the thing the question was not "would you be more surprised to run into a fairy or a walrus" the question was "would you be more surprised to find a fairy or a walrus AT YOUR DOOR" and while no, i do not believe in fairies and would be surprised to know they EXIST i would NOT be surprised to find one at my door. HOWEVER, if a WALRUS shows up at my door i have to contend with the fact that a walrus somehow made it to my apartment specifically and knocked on my door for god knows what reason. i would be more surprised to know that a fairy EXISTS, of course, but NOT that they're at my door, do you get me?

[fakebookreport]

You Exist Too Much by Zaina Arafat

This was such an impactful little book! The writing was really beautiful and introspective, a good mix of heartrendingly funny and deeply insightful. I liked the narrator, and I didn't think she was necessarily bad bisexual rep, but she was just a nuanced, flawed character who was sometimes unlikeable. I liked that it ended on a hopeful note for the protag without wrapping everything up too neatly. My only complaint is that the setting jumped around a lot, and it didn't really add anything to the plot. The story could have remained in one city and the plot would've been basically the same.

Structurally, Arafat's choice to tell this novel in non-chronological vignettes was highly effective. The main conflict was between the narrator and her mother, and by jumping around in time, Arafat was able to really drive home the way memory is warped by time and vice versa. It was clear that the mother was mentally ill, but I appreciated that Arafat didn't come right out and diagnose the her. (As a mentally ill writer/reader/human, this matters!) The dialogue, especially the mother's dialogue, was convincing while remaining eloquent.

Main takeaways from this book: (1.) vignettes differ from scenes. Don't ask me how. As a writing exercise, I tried to write a story in vignettes. I wrote a bunch of scenes. If I had to define it, (which I don't, but I will), I'd say a vignette stands alone, while a scene is a segment of a larger story. Though that second definition is applicable to a vignette as well. So don't ask me. (2.) Playing with chronological order is fun, and works well, when done with a purpose. This author definitely knew what she was doing. (3.) Please give your protag a name!

[plumdonutsv]

just finished reading “You Exist Too Much” by Zaina Arafat and it was so interesting. was rooting for the mc and was hoping for her to make better choices. the switching from different points in the mc’s life was a bit confusing for me tho

[fairycosmos]

you exist too much by zaina arafat

[hinamie]

ṇ̵̛̱͌̅̃͛̔o̴̮̓̀͂́̃_̴̛̲́s̷͈̋̈́̄̋͠ị̶͔̗̐͐̐̒̕g̵̛̱̘̣̑͂ņ̴̰͔̘͇̏̒̓̇͠͝a̸̜̥̩̭͋̌ḷ̶͔̖͗͋͛͛̃͆

[smokefalls]

“Your worries are like water,” she often said. “The moment one flows out, another floods in to fill the space.”

Zaina Arafat, You Exist Too Much

[treesofreverie]

I was loved from a distance, the safest way to be loved.

You Exist Too Much by Zaina Arafat

[houseofpurplestars]

"She's demanding and particular and forthright, and I love her for these things but I can't always live up to them."

- from "You Exist Too Much" by Zaina Arafat