#you don't need to marry your wife's whole family dude

[tommywambsgansceo]

This man needs serious help

[mixelation]

Just thought of smth. How do you headcannon the lgbt situation in Mutagenicity? Because I'm imagining Deidara and Itachi getting into one of their usual fights and Tori yelling "Would you two just kiss already?!" which then prompts the following reactions

Itachi who's been raised as a good little breeding stud for the Uchiha and Konoha as a whole "Don't be ridiculous Tori, two people of the same gender cannot be in a romantic partnership. How would we secure future generations of shinobi?"

Deidara who's a result of one of those breeding programs and is done with the whole thing "Ugh, with that asshole? Please I like to think i have some taste."

And Kushina who's been suppressing her desire to make out with Itachi's mom since grade school because of her own insecurities about being the last of a clan "Now now boys, it's perfectly natural to want to wrestle your friends into the dirt and have your way with them, but you have to stop it when you get older so you can make lots of cute babies, dattebane!"

Ha!

Personally my preference for Naruto fics is that people are largely cool with same gender relationships. That being said, sexism definitely exists in ninjaland, so certainly there's going to be some expectations about how romantic/sexual relationship "should" work. In Mutagenicity specifically, Itachi has been brought up with the idea that he needs to eventually marry someone with a working womb and produce a child.

However, I've been thinking about this more like... It's normal for ninja off stuck at war to have relationships with each other, and ninja skew male, so gay sex (especially among men) is pretty normalized. Then you get home from war and actually the dude you've been hooking up with is also your best friend who's saved your life twice, and you move in together and hold hands in public sometimes and no one will bat an eye. Gay dating maybe gets an eyebrow raise but for rando ninja, no one really cares. People only start having Opinions on your relationships if 1) you have a bloodline limit, or 2) you have specific clan duties related to having a biological child (so, you have a bloodline limit or some other heritable traits valuable to your clan, OR you have some sort of responsibility to make an heir). For Itachi, he both has a ""strong"" sharingan his clan wants him to pass on, AND he's supposed to make himself an heir.

People like Sasuke and Shisui, who are NOT heirs but are important Uchiha also with "strong" sharingan, probably have some expectations/social pressure from both the clan and society at large to make sharingan babies, but they could probably settle down with a man without causing a huge fallout. At some point Deidara will probably start getting weird comments about if his children will inherit things, but he doesn't have his own clan to pressure him and I can't see Minato's administration actively pushing him. Kushina almost definitely felt like she needed her own child to continue the Uzumaki, which is why she went for a super risky pregnancy over adoption, but also I think she and Minato also just.... really wanted a kid and their own little family, regardless. Like they make sure Naruto gets her clan name and not Minato's to continue that, but neither of them are upset Naruto didn't inherit the Uzuamki bloodline limit. Naruto is there because they love each other and just want a kid. If Kushina had fallen in love with a woman instead and wanted to marry her, I think she would have just gone "whatever, I'm marrying who I want because I do what I want, and I'll figure out getting a sperm donor later."

So, for Mutagenicity, it would be semi-fine if Itachi were gay and had a side piece who's his "real" romantic partner; he just needs the official wife and heir for political/pass-on-the-sharingan reasons. If he really wanted to, he could probably pull a "well, I'm clan head, and I say I want a husband," and then everyone would be mad for decades and the clan would insist he make a baby via surrogate (this is the Homemade Dynamite route, BTW, except all the clan elders are dead and Mikoto supports Itachi marrying Deidara because who else could possibly handle her freak son). However, Mutagenicity!Itachi isn't gay; he's asexual. He's shit out of luck. His lung condition does mean the clan is like "uuuuh well maybe it's time to bring in some outside genes--" so if he tricks the one woman he knows who's his age and can also stand hanging out with him into dating him, everyone will leave him alone--

Anyway, I think everyone on Team 4 knows same gender relationships are an option. I do think Itachi is very bad at recognizing he can have what he wants, so he might not consider it's an option for him specifically.... but Mutagenicity!Itachi specifically isn't super into men, because he's not really into anyone.*

*I think I do have meta somewhere where Itachi's like "why can't I just marry Shisui :(" and this thought isn't because Itachi is attracted to Shisui, it's because Shisui is someone Itachi cares about deeply, gets along with, and therefore he can see himself enjoying living with for the rest of his life. If Shisui fulfilled the requirement of "can give birth," Itachi would marry him in a second.

[atopvisenyashill]

how do you think alysanne would feel about gay targcest? because while i can believe the conqueror trio and jaehaerys see their incestuous traditions as a means to establish dominance over non-valyrians and produce pure-blooded dragon riders, alysanne always came off like she bought into the "romance" of it all. like if baelon ever came to her and admitted that he loves aemon more than he ever could alyssa, would she internally accept that as real love (even if not a politically convenient love) or would she insist that real targcest makes inbred babies and two brothers fucking each other is just a step too far for some reason?

okay first of all. fuck george for never giving us explicit mm targcest. i love rhaena the lesbian i think she’s a fascinating insight in valyrian gender roles and also she’s just a wildly interesting character. but she’s not enough dammit we need more queers. george stop being such a jersey boy and write anal. stop being afraid of penises george you're a grown ass married man.

second of all and keeping in mind i don't have f&b in front of me bc it's always checked out on libby. okay see i need to caveat this bc obviously there are different reactions to gay women vs gay men. but our only frame of reference here is RHAENA. (and laenor but alysanne didn’t know he was gay bc he was only like 4 when she died, LAENOR probably didn’t even know he was gay yet) and the thing is. they all know she’s gay! and no one seems to…care? alysanne & jaehaerys are happy when rhaena married androw but that’s bc it means she gets to live with ELISSA forever now. j&a aren’t like androw stans they don’t give a shit about that dude. they all seem very aware of who rhaena’s various girlfriends are! there’s no report of alysanne ever having a problem with this! it’s not like she showed up after the poisoning and was like “well maybe if you bedded your husband more often this never would have happened” does she? her problems with rhaena are all rooted in their PERSONALITIES in their TRAUMA like she’s not even recorded to have made some sort of nasty comment about any of Rhaena's lovers. in fact, the people who had an issue with Rhaena's lovers were a) the fathers of her girlfriends or b) Rhaena's own husband. Alysanne (and, to be fair, Jaehaerys) seems to view this whole ting more as like. Well that's just Rhaena, she's a bit odd. I think it adds to the almost Inhuman Beauty of Rhaena in a way - she's so larger than life, even her love can't be confined to the simple dichotomy of husband-and-wife, no she prefers her ladies instead (I was thinking of like, Lady Hideko from The Handmaiden - how the con artist mentions that there's a coldness to her that she could never be seduced by a man. An almost ethereal beauty there that is tied to the fact that she is not attracted to men).

What I think is key here is that a) they're both Valyrians b) Rhaena is her sister and Alysanne loves her despite the issues they have c) Rhaena "does her duty" and has a child by her Valyrian brother. SO. In my opinion, I think the specific scenario of Baelon coming to her and saying he doesn't love Alyssa, he loves Aemon, I think she would buy into the romantic nature of it. I think she would absolutely insist that he marry Alyssa anyway, if only to protect him from rumors and keep it like, ~in the family~ the way Rhaena and Aegon did, but if they only ever had Viserys, I think she would be okay with that. I think she would paint Alyssa as his "protector" in her mind - that fondness she saw between them wasn't her and Jaehaerys reborn after all, but perhaps more of the dynamic Rhaena likely wanted with Aegon (but reversed). Which isn't to say this won't devolve into a weird dynamic - the thing about this is that Alysanne isn't just projecting her own relationship onto her kids, she's projecting Rhaena & herself as well (imo Viserra gets the brunt of this) and Alysanne wanting her kids to playact a scenario where Rhaena is happily brother-married and living her best lesbian life still has just, so many openings to get really deranged. I think Jocelyn would face a lot of issues here. I think Alyssa might be allowed a level of GNC-ness that she isn't allowed in the books, but there's a trade off here where Alyssa is essentially playing Aegon the Uncrowned's role - and if she isn't happy with that, Alysanne would get upset. I think it's not unlikely Baelon doesn't get that "the Brave" epithet because he gets very force-femmed as a way to protect Aemon's reputation.

If Baelon was in love with like, some random household knight, that imo would upset Alysanne. But in love with Aemon? I do think she could make herself happy projecting onto that one.

[ladyanidala]

Surprise self-rec time! Pick 3 of your favorite things you’ve written and share them here, then put this in the inbox (anonymously or not) of your fellow writers to spread the positivity and help celebrate already written fics 💞

ANON YOU CAUGHT ME AT A GREAT TIME I RARELY GET TO ASKS IN A TIMELY FASHION

Alright alright.

NUMBER ONE PICK - IF YOU MUST READ ANYTHING FROM MY PROFILE ON AO3, READ THIS: We're Not Needed Here. This is my beloved crack fic that's currently on hiatus bc I'm getting married n stuff, and planning takes up so much of my energy :') But definitely read it!! Obi-Wan decides that he's had enough of the CIS/Republic war and makes the executive decision to take him, his family, and some clone battalions to his secret wife on Mandalore. Shenanakins ( ;) ) ensue.

NUMBER TWO PICK: Don't Come Any Closer (But Don't Move Away). This is my novella that I spent two whole months writing, and tbh, it was only supposed to be a 5k fic that ended up at 26k words. Whoopsies. Anyways, this follows Jesse and Doc as she's assigned to the 501st. Wild times, my dudes, wild and romantic times. If only they could stop hating each other for two seconds, smh...

AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST, NUMBER THREE PICK: What Once Was Lost, I Have Found Again. This is my Thornidala fic. It follows Padme and Commander Thorn after the rise of the Empire. Padme's trying to survive for the sake of her children, and Thorn's suffered enough from both the war and the activation of the chips. Padme is asked by Bail to take him in, and she agrees. Slow burn romance ensues (tho since it's a WIP, and again, I'm getting married, it's currently on hold).

Go read them, hoorah!!

Anon, thank you for your ask!! <3

[lindszeppelin]

I am the anon who sent you the long message, I am also a dude , Im of a rare breed in the fanbase , dont seem like there is alot of us here and thats ok lol I have sent you something before actually about how when men know we know. And I will say that over and over again. Seems like alot of the anons you get seem to be from people who are losing faith in that and think whatever Miss Gerber has with Austin is real. A man knows when he found his wife, not to get all preachy and sound like a religious crazy person but there is legit a whole bible verse in the book of Proverbs about it. I am 31, still young but old enough to know , especially as a married man myself when a guy has found his wife, he isnt hiding that shit. When i proposed to my wife we were on vacation and I legit facetimed my friends when she was in the shower and told them the news, up there squealing like a woman excited as hell LMAO. Austin is someone who wears his heart on his sleeve, if he saw that life with Kaia we would know it will show. So all that privacy BS is exactly that.....BS....like he dodges questions about her all the time and Kaia does the same, i personally have never seen celebs go that far to do that, even the ones who wanna be private. They still talk about each other. I think these shippers as I stated see themselves in Kaia,so when things are said about their relationship and lacking chemistry they take it as you saying about them and Austin...anyways I will stop ranting here but i wanted this to known and to give your blog a guy perspective

aaah welcome back in! nice to have you here. the fandom truly needs bit more guys in the fandom to balance out lol. and i think there are, but us women are a lot more vocal about it i'd say lol. and to each their own, it's so cool to have you here.

but i thank you once again for brining in the much needed male perspective on this situation. and coming from a man that is married and is Austin's age, that seriously should be everything that we need to heed your words.

i think a lot this discourse stems from the fact that the super young girls in this fandom closer to kaia's age clearly are showing that they haven't been in a serious relationship, or they don't have a lot of life experience. because a man should love his woman entirely and not be afraid to show it or talk about it. if a man hides his girl in any way then he's not happy with her. austin moves with kaia like a man that is not taking her serious. plus he knows she is too young for anything serious anyway. and when a guy TRULY thinks he has found his future wife, he won't waste time. i know this from personal family and friend experiences. i come from a parental background where my mom and dad got engaged after only 6 months of dating and they are still together 30+ years later. i know someone else where after only a week their man proposed and they are still together. like...it is what it is. a man can be just as emotional, clingy, and lovey-dovey to his woman than the woman is to him. ladies reading...if your guy doesn't act like the sun doesn't rise and set with you then he is not the one and he won't ever be. and that's okay. go find yourself a person that leaves no question as to their feelings for you. if you have to guess or question then, as the famous movie goes, he's just not that into you.

and you mentioned a verse in proverbs. i'm not necessarily a religious fanatic, however i am spiritual and i won't turn my nose up at acknowledging that stuff. . so if you would like to share the verse then go for it.

but once again, thank you so much for your insightful input!!

[bloodgulchblog]

Hey so awhile back due to an ask blog ask you weighed in a bit on whether or not Thel’s married. Can I ask your thoughts on stuff I found recently: Halopedia saying he is (I don’t know how long that’s been on his page), Cole Protocol using the phrasing “send for more wives” and “father more children”? When I saw all that I mainly thought of you and was wondering your take on it.

Oh yeah I took that into account!

I think there's room to read it as the family as a whole and not just as Thel himself, because it is way way way more people than just one dude in that keep and clan is a huge part of their lives. But also... I wouldn't fight in the dirt with someone over it?

I would say that if Halo wants to make it out that Thel is married in a convincing way, they would REALLY have needed to give us a canonical character by now for that. The last time I talked about this was before Outcasts came out, and because Outcasts didn't touch the topic it didn't resolve the question.

I think that if he had a wife or wives, it really should have come up in Outcasts because it was the first time in over a decade that we got any page time in the guy's head and I just... Don't see Thel not addressing where his partner(s?) would be and what they're doing in the events going down on Sanghelios. He's a very honorable and committed dude when he takes a course, and even in just a political marriage without romantic chemistry I think he'd still be dedicated about it.

So, even without anything spelling it out anywhere, I do feel reasonably confident as a fan playing with the idea that our guy is at least not married currently.

But even then, if 343 turned around and named the Arbiter's three weed-smoking wives tomorrow it would still kind of work because "Halo lore just didn't think about it until now" is a plausible explanation for so, so many Halo lore things over the lifespan of this IP.

[lesbiangummybearmafia]

Spoilers... on the last two episodes. More under the cut.

Ok first I have talk about the whole Turner situation. When she walked up to the whole Russell's clan like she thought she own the place on the arm of Colonel Sanders. I was like oh no she didn't... but well she did. I didn't like watching the color drain from Bertha's face though. Too bad she doesn't have Evil Queen magic, because she could of conjured up a fireball and throw it at her!! 😈

Wtf is Turners issue anyway with Bertha? Was it because she fired her, throw her out on her ear. Or could be revenge because she couldn't seduce George? Which it's like please bitch he has Bertha why oh why would he want your sorry ass. When she showed up in his bed naked I remembered thinking wow pathetic and desperate move there.

I wonder if Bertha going release the information of Turners ture identity out and ruin her? I think she may if Turner keeps messing with her!! Why do people mess with Bertha she will make them sorry, idiots.

Does anyone think that this new woman Oscar interested in could possibly be a lesbian? The reason I think this is Aurora mentioned that she has a female companion that goes everywhere with her. Now why we haven't met this female companion is beyond me. But it made me think, also wouldn't that be the best solution.

I'm really liking Marian with Dashiell Montgomery. I wasn't sure at first but so far I really like him. Now his daughter on the other hand, well she seems creepy and has anger management issues.

I'm so happy Peggy's back working for Aunt Agnes. I really liked her being at the house all the time.

They need to find a really good man for Gladys. Like her perfect dude! I really like her and I don't want to see them do her wrong.

Oh Larry needs to stop fucking Melania Trump!! Omg I thought that was such a slutty move when they bearly know each other she's already going to sleep with him. Especially back then. When Bertha wants it stopped and ask George to talk to Larry. I hate it when George all with the bullshit "boys will be boys" line. I started thinking about that, I can only imagine how different the world might be if men, young men in particular hadn't been allow to get away with shit just because they happen to be men. If they had been held up to the same high standard as women and young women back then. Larry can have sex with as many women as he wants as long it does bring shame to the family name. But Gladys couldn't even sleep with one guy before she's married or she would be considered wholly unworthy of marriage. 🙄 I really think everyone really needs to sleep with the partner you're going to marry!!! Especially then when being married was forever! Bad sex life for decades... no thank you!

But back to Larry and that woman whatever her name is. She gotta go, she's annoying, possessive, I'm sorry gonna say it too old for him (he looks like he's with his mom when they stand next to her. Never a good look). I don't know I just don't like her.

I personally want to watch Bertha crush Mrs. Astor like a bug. Bitch thinks people should just do whatever she said. No, Bertha don't play that way!!

Ok seriously George needs to buy Bertha a huge bouquet of flowers or some super lux piece of jewelry. Because no he didn't do anything wrong but he should of told her sooner so she didn't caught out by that gold diggin bitch. Who wouldn't of been able to make it out to be something it wasn't! Dumb ass doesn't he know anything happy wife, happy life! Because I do not like seeing Bertha upset, crying, sad, feeling like her husband may of betrayed her trust in one of the worst ways!! Just breaks my heart seeing her cry. 💔 Just want to smack George upside the head. Dude you have more money than God, do sometimes super special for your wife!!!

Oh Aunt Ada and the Preach man is just too sweet!! 😍 Aunt Agnes better not mess it up. We all know he's not up to Aunt Agnes standards, but I don’t think he needs to be. It's not like with Marian where that need for money is so great. With Aunt Ada, a man that's not rich wouldn't be an issue. I'm pretty sure the Preacher man makes enough for the both of them. Aunt deserves a romantic love in her life. She's so kind, sweet, loving, she just wants happiness for everyone she loves. She'd be friends with everyone if Aunt Agnes would let her. See she'll be the perfect preachers wife. I wish i.had an Aunt Ada in my life!

[sukirichi]

holy shit long rant ahead

"Like-like you're looking for the man who courted you two years ago, the one you truly wanted to marry. Well, I'm sorry to disappoint, because you're not going to find him. He never existed in the first place. Whatever it is you're looking for, you won't find it in me," *shit here we go again audio with head in my hands*

"Get out of your head. Just because I did all those things for you, doesn't mean they meant something. Are you forgetting I spent two years of my life trying to win you over, and I never once felt something for you other than tolerance?" When your face fell, triumph washed over his features. "That's right. You remember now, don't you? She's the one I want. Everything I do is for her. Don't forget your place."

Man idk how the princess heard this another time without breaking down in rage cause either this man is going down with me or nothing. Princess where is your self respect? PICK YOURSELF UPPPPPPP THIS MAN LEGIT RUNS ALL OVER YOU AND all we do is cry and yearn for more LIKE WE NEED TO BLOW IR*S AND HIM UP ATP BRING THE BIG GUNS OUT I NEED KUROO AND HIS ROOSTER LOOKING ASS TO POST THAT ARTICLE ASAP

“Your mother's sniffles was the last thing you heard before the sound of a fist connecting with skin resounded in the area. Pulling back, you gasped at what you saw.”

OH THE SATISFACTION I FELT HERE SWEET HEAVENS I wish someone recorded it and we could watch it all over again cause UM LESGO WWE 🗣️🤺 never have I ever loved a father this much cause he SLAYED LEFT NO CRUMBS AT ALLL #curedmyfatherissues

“Want me, you pleaded silently, at least want me. Just a little bit.” pookie 🤠😟😞 cmon we better than this

“Rintaro hadn't mean to. Sure, he was careless and never used protection, but he thought little of it. Iris® cycles were irregular and they never worried if she missed her period. She was always on the pill - all because of him, since Kiyoomi wouldn't have touched her anyway.”

he’s one sick bastard I hope he rots imagine cheating on your wife that you claim to love, doing it in your shared bed AND without protection like babe the article was so deserved by god

and the ending sentence,,,,,just made me so sick because as much as I hate rin and ir*s, I think I hate the queen and the king more because the issues started with them. with the king being an absolute whore and having kids with random ass women LIKE WHERE IS THE VASECTOMY GET HIS TUBES TIED and the queen being a bitch to rin his whole life just to find out my man got issues for nothing??? not defending him at all but to find out that all he knew as his “home” and family (even tho they sucked) were all never really his,,, I can see his heart breaking with the image he had of his family in his mind in the form of drawings made by his inner child, torn in half,,,,,,,oh I am about to be SICK

(and once he finally found his real home aka princess, bro fumbled it up BADDDD like if I was him I would beg for forgiveness + repent + burn the castle with the queen in it <33 (not the princes, tobio pookie you are coming home with me)

bro’s mental health must be in a delicate state, I hate him but I am also worried for him 🥲

- Freud anon is in shambles btw

THE HERE WE GO AGAIN AUDIO AAHJKA SO TRUE he just keeps on going back and forth like decide already!! 😭 do you want us or not!!

the self respect is… there, just buried under very deep layers of still hoping for something good. but also like we can’t really blame dtd!yn for acting this way because rintaro was FINALLY changing and being the husband we wanted him to be! the whole romantic dinner setup, working on the beach house together, and not once even mentioning iris????!!? BRO WAS DEDICATED. but then yeah he really just had to ruin it all again UGH. “all we do is cry and yearn for more.” actually real.

the daddy issues tag im crying 😭 sending all my love and hugs to you anon. BUT YES omg I loveeee our dad so much in DTD because he really said fuck around and find out! dude literally did not care that he was punching a royal because his daughter was more important than their titles! our parents in dtd are soo parents goals I love them <3

nauh bcos rintaro is careless and CRAZYYY. not only did they do it in OUR bed but he did it raw like! I would’ve thrown up ngl. AGHJSKA the vasectomy LMFAO. unfortunately it’s his duty to have many children and he fulfilled that part VERY well, just yknow… they really should’ve specified to him that he had to have kids with his wife and not other women. but yes I agree! all the problems really started because the king and queen hated each other (or more like, the queen hated him for how he treated her, and the king just didn’t care about her at all. he just knew she’d be a good queen and he needed someone smart and capable in leading the country so he can slack off. terrible, terrible man.) YES OMGGG THE DRAWINGS STOPPP I GET SO SAD EVERYTIME I THINK OF RINTARO’S LIFE WAS STOLEN FROM HIM AND ALL HIS ISSUES, EVERYTHING THAT HE FUCKED UP, HAD BEEN FOR NOTHING! and now he’s fumbling so bad too like bro is losing everything that should’ve never been his in the first place ugh.

YES! we protect and love tobio in this house!! and I agree </3 rintaro is going through a lot and it honestly goes two ways – it’s either he does worse things to cope, or he completely shuts down and forgets everything that happened. I’m not sure which one I prefer…

[emblazonet]

Nerilka's Story

Can someone explain why this book exists, please?

It's fucking TINY and it took me over a month to get through, and it somehow managed to make me hate characters from Moreta: Dragonlady of Pern, which is an incredible feat, because I loved Moreta and the cast.

I liked Nerilka in Moreta. She was fine.

Being in her head was like someone rubbing a cheesegrater on my skull.

As usual, spoilers follow for a book that's been out since 1986.

I mean, Anne McCaffrey did succeed in writing a first-person book that is exactly like a person writing shit down in a diary with very little filter and with no real sense of plot, and if I wanted that, I would go read a real person's diary, because it sure as fuck couldn't be more boring than this.

The first half of the book is just Nerilka (Rill) being all like 'wah I was mean to my family and now they're dead' which, like, valid thing to be sad about. Her dad sucks, which we know from Moreta. Great, we can maybe have tension with him—wait no. Suddenly the focus then moves on to Rill's flouncy stepmother who is just a really boring charicature of a stock villain. She's pretty and brainless and lords it over Nerilka and it's flat and boring and comes across as pretty misogynistic honestly.

McCaffrey's weird bloodline shit is extra gross in this. The drudges come off as subhuman in intelligence, who must be managed and herded. (And then all the parts later on where Alessan needs to have a person of the right bloodline to marry and I'm just like.... why.) There's no magic or anything that runs through bloodlines. There's no scientific reason why nobles matter more than other people. It's just stated to matter for some reason with no back up. If the caste system was like, nuanced or something—a drudge struggles to be thought of as intelligent or something, in another Pern story even!—then I'd be more tolerant, but this seems like an unconscious bias, and therefore it irks me.

The other issue with the first half of the book is that it's a really shoddy rehash of stuff that already happened in Moreta. Yawn.

I was relieved at first when Rill finally got to Ruatha hold where hopefully she could have some characters to interact with—the telling instead of showing was by this point irritating the everloving fuck out of me. Unfortunately it's just 'here's some boring vaccine logistics' for pages. Then finally Moreta dies which introduces some conflict...

And instead of anything compelling we end up with Mega Depressed Emotional Shutdown Alessan who basically gets a complete personality wipe, because that's how grief works right? And then suddenly he's making some stupid shitty suicide bargain to Rill. "You can kill me once I put a bun in your oven, but don't worry, I won't beat you!" WOW.

WOW. (There's no 'omg you were Lady Nerilka all along!' moment in any of the book, by the way, despite her travelling incognito. Everyone just already knew. That dialogue might have been fun! Can't have that.)

(There's also no scene where Rill and Alessan reminisce over Suriana, the one person they loved in common, because that also might be fun or have emotional resonance.)

And then Alessan is a zombie for the rest of the book. Look, yes, grief changes people, sure, but like. Maybe we can cut out realism in the TELEPATHIC DRAGON book to maybe not have a previously-likeable dude turn into 'not beating my wife is my one redeeming quality haha I have no emotions anymore.'

Like he gets four sons and doesn't emote until there's a daughter???

And Rill's like "This is fine, he has no real emotion for me except pragmatic approval, but I like being pregnant so it's a happy ending after all!"

(This book has some weird moments about pregnancy. Like the whole bit with the runner giving birth where Rill says runners are so much more advanced than humans because they don't wail and weep and curse in pain. What. What is that. Why is that. That's fucking weird, Anne! That's a weird thing to say! I love my random animal birth scenes to have an Obligatory Misogynist moment to make the narrator sound like she's Not Like Other Women, that's fucking great.)

Anyway this book fucking sucked and I'm going to pretend it never happened in order to go on enjoying Moreta.

1/10 YIKES

[mlobsters]

supernatural s8e12 as time goes by (w. adam glass)

now that i'm totally bummed out with all the john talk, cain and abel bloodline, etc etc... you better not be making this a rehabbing john winchester episode :p

DEAN Yeah, right. Seriously? Dudes time-travelling through motel-room closets? That's what we've come to?

uh huh

DEAN Yeah, well, either way, Dad hated the son of a bitch. SAM And Dad made up for that how? By being father of the year?

haha, louder for the people in the back!!

DEAN Look, Dad had his issues, okay, but he was always there for us.

EXCUSE ME. dean, no, we know better than this. he was literally, canonically, very often NOT THERE FOR YOU. as kids, as adults. oh my god. haha whisper yelling at dean through the screen.

a) the only reason i know the name abaddon is from the book abaddon's gate by james sa corey, which the series it's in got turned into an excellent show that's one of my favorites as well, the expanse. so, learn something new every day, didn't know it was a angel/demon/bible/pit thing

b) i have forgotten after reading the abaddon wiki article. oh right, men of letters, this is funny. i'm well familiar loosely with them, the bunker, etc via fic. but just set dressing. had no idea the backstory

ay this cheesy rousing music while henry waxes poetic about the glory that is the men of letters and their family legacy. cannot

he went on a little face journey here that was like flirty appreciative, to a little surprised and sadconcerned? haha i could project thoughts all over that, wonder what that was about

oh oh john got traumatized by his father abandoning him which was actually a demon's, a knight of hell specifically, fault. the rehabilitation :P

HENRY John was a legacy. I was supposed to teach him the ways of the Letters. DEAN Well, he learned things a little differently. HENRY How? DEAN The hard way. Surviving a lonely childhood, a stinking war... only to get married and have his wife taken by a demon... and later killed by one himself. That man got a bum rap around every turn. But you know what? He kept going. And in the end, he did a hell of a lot more good than he did bad.

he did good in the world. and he neglected and traumatized his children. it's hard for me to go macro when the results of the micro are splashing around the pool of their trauma daily in front of my face. i know dean is feeling defensive and protective and etc etc.

the mismatch of the outside of the motel and the downright fancy inside is weird. this whole thing is kinda weird. don't be weird, time traveling grandpa

same, dean, same.

i think a lot of what kills the production value in the newer seasons is how evenly and boringly lit so much of it is. yeah the first seasons were often too dark, but at least they used shadows to their full effect. it was interesting! look at the lighting in the this random scene in a motel in s1e4 phantom traveler

and the slow pan with the exposed leg lol different universe. anyway i scrubbed through literally e1-4 to find that damned scene. desaturated grainy deliciousness. so much more atmosphere

DEAN Listen, I understand that this is not your idea of a happy ending, okay, and that – that you're disappointed that me and Sam are mouth-breathing hunters. But you know what? We stopped the Apocalypse.

there you go, tell him! y'all did some shit and without the resources or education availed to him

DEAN (on phone) Sammy? ABADDON (on phone) No. Much sexier. Try again. DEAN (on phone) Abaddon. ABADDON (on phone) Good boy. Now listen up – I want to make a good, old-fashioned horse trade. Henry and the key for your brother. Or he dies. Am I clear?

the makeup/fake tan on jackles is just so sad and distracting

DEAN Henry, you need to understand something. When my dad died, I couldn't save him… no matter how bad I wanted to. I never want that to happen to Sam… ever. If there's a chance that I can save him, I'm gonna do it. He's my brother. He's the only family I got.

ps we've both died a bunch and i have personally resurrected him before sooo

i'm sorry dude but this is just a lot

SAM I get it now. DEAN Hmm? SAM What Cupid said about heaven busting ass to get Mom and Dad together. The Winchesters and the Campbells – the brains and the brawn. DEAN Well, I'm glad you see it. All I see in our family tree is a whole lot of dead.

mmmk. the whole thing feels very.. tacked on. like they just introduced this whole chunk of magic users wholecloth and wedged it in with a very flimsy excuse as to why it was nonexistent prior to this

SAM You think it would have made a difference? DEAN What? SAM Dad. If he'd had his own father around. DEAN What, in how he raised us? Sammy, he did the best he could. SAM I know that. I – I do. They all did.

sometimes the best you can do is recognize that you don't have the means to raise these kids and maybe someone else in the family would be better suited and willing. like hey. bobby perhaps. blargh. gets my parenting hackles up. and like i've said before, they can feel what they wanna feel and it's good if they're at peace with it, but don't try to sell me on john being a good dad, actually :p

my tolerance for bad plot shit is high, i am a fan of teen wolf (and the killing s2 i'm looking at you) after all. but it is still a bummer

[radradmarivy]

Sadly.... I have seen this happen too many times. People take this "no judging" thing too far. You don't judge someone who steals food for their Kids, you don't judge someone who uses the same clothes because they have no money to buy more, you don't judge a hoarder because they have a mental issue that makes them sick, you don't judge a depressed person for not being able to wash their hair or a neurodivergent kid for feeling bad because of the color red.

But if you date a crackhead that is your choice. If you wait more than 3 years for a man to marry you when it's obvious he won't, that is your choice. I am all for marriage but only because it gives you legal protections not because i believe in the institution of marriage... And it's better to always have a signed contract even with the man you want to spend the rest of your life, y'all.

But men have no problem using women as placeholders or providers of free services because women make their lives easier. It's a free cook, a maid, someone to sleep with, someone who takes care of them and brings another check, a broodmare for their "legacy" or a free nanny for the kids he already has. A woman brings a lot to them and they have no idea how to thrive on their own, have you seen how thei live when they are single??

You are all better off alone, trust me. Men are vampires that will suck you dry of your youth, your wealth, your love and any resource you May have because they can do this with no consequence. BUT if you are crazy enough to have a long relationship with a man, you have to choose the best you can.

Don't date a fucking crackhead, or a dude with 7 Kids, a dude that has no job. If he will take your resources, he has to bring resources to your life too, he has to make it just as easier as you would make his!! And marriage is a must, because one day after 8 years he will leave for a younger model or die or whatever and YOU ARE ON YOUR OWN, BABE!

Set a date in your head, don't tell him. Men know IMMEDIATELY if they are going to wife you up, if they wanted to marry you, he would propose as soon as he could. He could even buy a cheap ring and promise you a better, bigger one for your aniversary, he would take two Jobs, a loan, he would do whatever the fuck he needed to do if you are the one he truly wants to have by his side. Never forget that men are capable of leaving a whole ass family behind when they fall in love, they have no chill.

If he doesn't propose and makes you wait, he doesn't love you. He has you as a place holder. If you have to beg and nag for a ring, he doesn't love you. If he puts excuses, he doesn't love you. Put a deadline in your head, tell them that you wish to marry if you are in a long relationship and let it cook. The deadline came and he still doesn't propose?? Leave, you can find better.

And for fuck's sake, stop dating idiots for their potential and expect them to wife you up! Because I AM going yo judge you for dating a goddamned crackhead like a fool and for waiting for a ring more than 4 years. Or for having Kids before the ring!

C'mon, be smart. Life is too short to fuck yourself up like that.

Ramona😭😭😭

[codycoyote008]

Fundraisers:

https://gofund.me/b141d50f

(some of the links can of course, given the situation, get graphic- I probably don't need to warn you given the context, but just to be safe yknow. The Google spreadsheets and Tumblr ones are fine, if you have the money to donate you don't need to look through, it's GoFundMe the button's right there. All of these are on the spreadsheets so far but as I mention later, I'm saving these for myself)

I keep getting asks about these and honestly feel terrible since at the moment I'm underage, unemployed, and can't even get a job until my body's in better health, but I do want to donate to these myself whenever I do have the money for it, and I figure hey even if my account's a couple of days old and I'm too slow to post anything fun and cute, I may as well do what I can, which, for now, is share the links and talk about it.

I won't be able to donate for every one even when I do have the money, I know, and considering I'm going into a part-time job at a grocery store, it probably won't be the best anyways, but if I can try to help at all then at least I made an attempt.

I'm putting all of the ones I've gotten asks about so far in this post, and you can find them above. This also saves the links for myself later on without worrying about putting them somewhere I'll forget, which is nice. I also added the google spreadsheets links so you can scroll through those if you like.

There's also plenty of other resources to donate to, as well, if you don't feel like a personal fundraiser (and I get why, really, as much as I still encourage you to at least look through) so even if you skip past these, there's also things like Doctors Without Borders which I'm sure you've heard of anyways, and you can read about their work there if you like, help.rescue.org has one, Unicef's is specifically intended to help children by the look of it, humanrightscareers has a whole list of them, I'm sure there's plenty more, at least take a glance at the GoFundMe pages for me (or the spreadsheets), a look is better than nothing dude.

Obviously a lot of people are suspicious about personal GoFundMe pages, and I get why, but at the same time, not everyone's malicious, and certainly not everyone's malicious enough to do that. I'm sure at a glance I could look malicious, I'm a teenager in America (in the South no less) why am I posting about this, idk man 'cause I want to. I have the free will to do it. I think in the case of... idk man.. war??? We should be a lot less suspicious right now. Yes it might be a scam if it's not verified, even if it is you can get a refund, GoFundMe does that. Everyone can lie. I don't care right now. I'm suspicious about everything, normally, I think everyone could use some healthy skepticism, but there's a time and a place and I don't think in this case where afaik the most harm that's done is you needing to go to GoFundMe for your refund on the off chance it's a scam is it.

Everything below the read more is kind of long and rambly, but I'll keep going anyways since I don't know when to stop. <3

Read if you like skip if you insist idc, I'm including it anyways since maybe autistic ranting will make someone stop and think a little more about it, and even if it doesn't I've been on Tumblr like three days and already seen way more people being cruel about all of this than I'd like. I just wanna clarify I guess idk.

I know sharing doesn't help as much as it could, but if you're in any position to donate I'd really encourage you to, or at least look more into it. I really don't know what else to say regarding it. I'm 16 in America with a family that tends to stay out of news and everything, so until pretty recently I was kind of in the dark given the US's "ignore everything outside of our country" kind of attitude- which I feel like means it's even more important that I try.

I know a lot of people, especially here, look at situations like this and decide they don't want to focus on the negativity, and I get that if your mental health is really in a low spot and it's for your safety, do whatever you need then, it's not my place to say what you do or don't need- but a lot of people I've seen say this are my age, they have the position to share these things even if they can't afford to donate, they can do research and figure out how they can try to help, they can do a lot more than they assume they can, and they choose to ignore it saying they don't want to focus on that, saying it's a "safe space-" but I mean, I hate to say it, that's really cruel to say given the situation. Your little corner of the internet is a safe space for you, to ignore people who need help. Ew.

I get that way of thinking, I really do, but at the same time if you turn a blind eye to things like this you're just making it so that other people do, too. I'm 16 and a punk and Tumblr is the first big social media I've joined since YouTube, and despite the fact I'm part of a subculture entirely based around... everything punk is based around... I hadn't heard a lot about this- I'm active on YouTube, I follow lots of people who I like the art of or who share at least a few of my ideals, and still, I've heard next to nothing about it- no "hey sorry to interrupt the video but this is really important go donate if you can," no "and speaking of _, let's talk about this for a minute," nothing outside of a link in the description sometimes. Nobody's really talking about this. I get why, like I said. We don't want to think about bad things happening to people, and Americans are just really intolerant of people outside the country to begin with (and inside the country, but that's another issue), but I think if we ever want to see the world become healthier and happier than we've let it get so far... we can't just go "well I don't want to think about the negativity so I'll pretend it doesn't exist." That leads to ignorance bubbles which is also like super unhealthy...

All of that said, I'm turning asks off on this blog for now and the other ones will remain for those fitting the context. It's not even that I don't wanna see them, that would be hypocritical, I just want to keep the part with the fundraisers themselves relatively short. Like I said, look at the spreadsheets, look at the organizations helping out, look into stuff dude, do research, life is always better if you dig into things more thoroughly, trust me. If you have read this far then I appreciate it, and I hope you have a lovely, safe day.

[jaywritesrps]

Bro...your girl f'ing stepped in it again. Another day, another Sophia Bush gaffe. What exactly is wrong with her? Why does she think anyone cares about how she and trashlyn started dating? She's out with a new narrative in her WIP podcast, and this one might be the worst yet. Trying to say that trash was asking to be set up by her friends last summer. Yeah, no. Not buying it one bit. After getting out of a 13 year relationship with two actual babies at home? I don't think her first thought was, oh, I want to start dating right away. No, what likely happened is that they fell for each other in Cannes last June, AH came home and broke up with Ali, and then spent the rest of the summer following SB around while they devised their escape plans. This whole spin of, 'Oh, what a fun coincidence- we were both single' is just flat out wrong. But we know why she's trying to spin this. Because if she got caught cheating with a married woman, then there goes her whole public persona of being the wronged wife all those years ago, and she looks like lying douchebag (which she is). The truth is just so hard for these two women to come by. And all her lying does is perpetuate the hate they each get. Why not be f'ing honest? Hey, public, guess what? We met, we caught feelings, we decided we needed to explore it, and we did. We are much happier now. That sentiment is much easier to digest than the crap they're trying to peddle.

Also, she makes her gf look like a HORRIBLE mother by suggesting all this. Like, what kind of evil witch would insist on adopting a baby when they were so miserable in their marriage? And then actually leave it less than year later. Does she think Ocean's birth parents like hearing all this? They could have given him to someone else- a couple that was actually happy and planned to stay together.

None of it lands, and they both wind up looking like pathetic liars. Try the truth ladies- it will get you so much further!

Signed,

A Bushlyn hater

Sorry for taking a bit to answer this, I wanted to hear it first before talking about it and my dude... Sophia's biggest strength and biggest foe is that she is too transparent sometimes, especially when she is happy, cause it's in these moments it looks like she turns her brain off and pull some really dumb moves (like making a "joke"in a podcast about her wedding with Chad and it backfiring later when Chad replied). With that being said, It was at least reckless to talk about that stuff, cause Ashlyn is still in a custody battle, it can be used against them if Ali's lawyer want so, it's something too particular and that it's going to be used against her.

To me, it was stupid to talk about it, cause, even if it's true what Ashlyn said in that statement that it was clearly written by a PR team, and she and Ali had a deal to divorce, for all that matters, they were still married and still couple, so it sounded more that she was indirectly owning that she was indeed persuading a married woman and that the claims people are saying about her are true, and worse, that her gf was lying too when she said she put effort in fixing their marriage (how can you claim you put effort in fixing your marriage if you were asking a famous person to set you up with other famous persons with money, when you have a family trip scheduled? Can you guys see how this is a contradiction?) Sophia again is lighting herself on fire to clean someone that wouldn't do the same for her, cause I really doubt that if it was otherwise, Ashlyn would do the same for her.

This story she told also confirms another time the first gut feeling I had about this whole thing, that Ashlyn sure is using Sophia. Cause that story of "oh I was the one who asked her out" prove my point a couple of asks ago when I said that Ashlyn's plan was to befriend her straight resourceful friend, so she could get out of her divorce with a protection, but when the straight friend asked her out, she saw her golden ticket to also getting a good life, cause a nobody like her now has access to the white house and to a future president of United States.

[teddieh]

Going Shopping With the DBZ Boys

Characters included:

Trunks, Future Trunks, Goten, Gohan, Vegeta, and Goku. 

Rating: T (slight mentions of nsfw but nothing explicit)

Reader has fem characteristics! 

Hope you guys enjoy. I’m on a DBZ kick again and missing the boys! (Also is it just me or does anyone else HATE GT Goten’s hair?)

Gohan

Veggies! What can we make with these?

Practical

Easiest to shop with. 

Always reminds you to check the expiration dates on food

Would prefer to let you push the buggy but still consults you on everything first. 

Checks the quality of the ingredients

Asks "Do you really need those?" In a soft smiling voice when you already grabbed one cookie pack and reached for another.

Don't worry you still get to have your snacks. He just wants to make sure ya don't overdo it.

Predicts the cost before you get to the register

Enjoys talking over what meals you guys could make together like a settled married couple. .

Also always carries a shopping list with a pen behind his ear and marks things off as you get them

Probably prefers to get the fruits and veggies at the farmers market but sometimes you do whatcha gotta do. 🤷🏾‍♀️ (he prob still goes anyway)

Speaking of: at the farmers market.

He gets you a cute little Sunhat and thinks you're the most adorable ever.

You prob hold his hand or hug his arm while he has a basket in the other

He's super friendly, polite, and a sweetheart.

He always has long conversations with the shop owners

They prob know him as a regular and by name

He'll walk up to a stall and they'll be like

"Hey Gohan!" And He'll smile and be like

"Good morning Mr. Ishikawa! How's little Timmy?"

And then the stall manager goes into how little timmy is feeling better after that strange bean Gohan gave him to help, that his little tummy stopped hurting and he's walking right again and you're like 

?????? He knows this dude's whole ass family?? 

That's just Gohan for you though. 

Turns out he knows the whole family as his wife comes up and pinches Gohan's cheek.

It's cute, you think, smiling as the woman talks about how helpful Gohan and Goten (when he visits sometimes) are, helping them pack the stall away and having come early the time one of them was sick to help set the stall up.

Gohan is the sweetest and you're reminded of it again at moments like these.

Goten

SNACKS

You lose him in the sports aisle

The type to hop on the buggy and ride it

Also wants to push the buggy

And wants to put you in it and push it

Probably spends a lot of time in the meat aisle wanting to stockpile. But is surprisingly good about detecting when a meat isn't good quality or will go bad soon or something. 

Chatterbox 

"Doesn't that pineapple look like Vegeta?"

"Kami! That melon is as big as Mr. Popo's head!"

"Do ya think if we buy Salmon we can get Gohan to make us somethin'?"

He picks up a battered bag of bread, grinning "Looks like somebody got into'a fist fight! I'd hate to see the other guy!"

Always makes you laugh during your adventures. 

His cute puppy eyes always convince you to get food you don't really need or want but. Is good about making sure you treat yourself to snacks or bath bombs or that pushy or shirt you're eyeing.. 

Honestly not super fond of shopping. He just likes spending time with you

Is the type of boyfriend who always wants to touch you somehow,,

A hand on your waist as you're reaching for something on the top shelf as he grabs it with ease,

An arm around your shoulders as he walks with you

His arms around your waist from behind, head on the crown of yours or your shoulder (it's awkward to walk like this but, he's warm and does make you feel safe from prying eyes) 

Protein protein protein

And beans. Those are the things highest on his list food wise, things that are filling and things semi easy to cook. Gohan had taught him to cook as a kid but he much prefers you cooking for variety, otherwise he eats a lot of the same things. 

If you let him, He'll push the buggy but he wants to do the reaching and heavy carrying for you. He enjoys watching the look of concentration on your face as you go through the list of things you guys need.

Trunks

Bougie

Stuck in technology. 

Only buys high quality things despite seeming the mostly chill type (has high standards because of his mum)

"We can make that at home."

"But if we get the parts for the computer I could build you one!"

Makes you try everything on in the dressing room before you go. (and take pictures in it)

Does not often go to the farmers market but shops only at high quality food stores when he can

Also shops at local owned places if they sell what you guys need and you guys don't need something in bulk

So He'll go to the local butcher for meats, when the farmer comes in once a week to drop their goods (milk, eggs, fruits etc) at the local store he'll buy that stuff from them if he has time

Usually factors grocery shopping into his schedule planning, maybe has about an hour and a half at the end of every week specifically cut out for the shopping since he's usually pretty busy. 

If he goes with you, the two of you alternate between whose leading the cart since you're both usually distracted by different things

The both of you sometimes walk away from the cart too, and you have to tug his sleeve and point back to the buggy and he'll go "oops, my bad. 😅"

Keeps the grocery list on his phone and checks things off as you guys go

Is a bit silly. Cracks jokes and pokes fun at you but always makes sure you guys have everything you came for by the time you leave.

Can get annoyed if you guys take too long. His answers become shorter and more straight to the point. He doesn't mean it to be mean but he gets bored from it quite quickly. Doesn't find grocery shopping that fun, honestly.

It's different in a mall with a variety of other stores and things to do, but even then, shopping isn't Trunks favorite thing to do in the first place.

Vegeta

Are we done yet?? Why did you drag me along? You can shop for your damned self. 

Get the Ham

Says he hates pink but always ends up buying a pink shirt 🤔

Yells at everyone who bumps into the two of you

Why do you need so many soaps? 

You’re going to look like a green rat wearing that

No patience or filter

Annoyed when he watches you try on clothes

But if he sees you in something he likes

He might push you into the dressing room-- 🤭

Doesn't want to be there longer than he has to

But does end up looking at athletic clothes for a bit. 

Your groceries are likely full of protein rich foods etc.

Honestly finds the activity tedious. 

Is only there because you said you'd need his help carrying things (even if you're strong enough to do it yourself, appealing to his ego, batting your eyelashes, might get him to go. If you're actually strong enough to do it yourself he'll stare at you and almost glare "Pick another excuse.")

If you have to pick another excuse honestly just say you want to spend some more time with him, and it's nice to see him in a domestic setting. 

He'll grumble a bit but come along. It's nice to know he's wanted, and he may not say it out loud but he enjoys spending time with you too. 

Pretty quiet actually during your trip. Occasionally throws out something sarcastic or tells you to try something on.

Complains occasionally if he feels you're taking too long and not being productive about it (i.e. comparing two brands of Maple syrup) 

Is a people watcher. Doesn't actually care too much about the shopping and finds himself instead watching people with a stern look on his face. People can sometimes feel his glare and it unnerves them.

Is judgemental as fuck. But mainly does it in his head, or says something to you.

 A child having a tantrum? "Hmph. Trunks would never. A horrid mother can't raise the child correctly." 

A dad ignoring his kid who's wandering off while he's clearly flirting on the phone?  He grabs the child by their waist and snatches the phone from the man and drops the kid in his arms. "Take care of your brat before it dies. Your duty as a father is more important, and if you let this child get crushed because of your insolence, I will exterminate you myself." His hand doesn't break the phone, but he digs his fingers in enough to leave his indents and warp the phone's shape before he pushes it against the man's chest with a pat.

You wouldn't expect Vegeta to intervene, however after two kids of his own and growing and settling more within what it means to live on Earth, he's changed quite a bit. If something annoys him enough he does something about it.

You're impressed, grinning at him with a cooked eyebrow. 

"So..?"

Vegeta scoffs. "Nothing worse than terrible parents. Are you finished with this chore? I am ready to leave." 

You smile at him and give his cheek a kiss. "It was sweet of you. But you can't just grab random people's kids.."

"Someone else would have and it would not have been as kind as I was."

"Vegeta, still!" 

"Next time I shall let the child get crushed by a shelf containing Potato chips. Would that soothe you?"

"Vegeta!"

Future trunks (FT)

Coupons

Deal hunter

Almost never leaves your side.

Runs the buggie 

Swears he remembers everything but carries a lil grocery list

Also pretty quiet during the trip

Enjoys watching you

Grocery shopping is a luxury trip that he hadn't had in years

And so being able to do it with you makes it all the more special

Enjoys the domestically of it

When FT is with someone he sees himself with them for the long haul, so he can't help but feel like you guys are this sweet little married couple. 

Never complains, slightly frugal because of how he grew up but you encourage him to indulge sometimes. It's good for him. 

Shows you how to test if a watermelon is good via knocking

Is good at finding sweet oranges within the piles.

Also prefers to shop locally if possible.

Grocery trips, also about once a week are also spent as time talking and catching up and planning dinners and weekend cooking together.

Enjoys the time before too. When you're going through the fridge and the cabinets and telling him what you're low on and what you need.

"Oyster sauce?"

"Nope! We're out!"

"White rice?"

"Half full, captain!" You grin, saluting him. He shakes his head with a smile.

"How's the fruit, first mate?"

"Well," you bend over, tugging out the container at the bottom of the fridge and gazing through it. "our peaches are sinkin! We're overrun with apples, full up on oranges, strawberries, and we've got a pineapple that's about ready to cut and about'ta pint of blueberries."

"Check, check, got it."

You stand, "Salts on low, could use some more carrots and potatoes. Maybe some white pepper and some more Mirin and Su..ah, and Furikake.."

"Got it." Too busy scribbling things down he didn't notice your approach. "One more thing!" You grin at him and he looks up at you, blinking at your closeness. "Yes?" 

"I'm missing kisses Trunks? How'd we run out of those." You take and shake your head and he cooks and eyebrow. "We never really keep those around anyway thou--"

He's cut off when you cup his cheeks and plant a kiss upon his lips. He's shocked for a moment before he's giving you a gentle kiss back and grinning slightly shyly when you pull away. "Ah.. that sort of kiss. I have plenty of those, you need only ask." He shakes his head. You're laughing and throwing your arms around his neck, sitting yourself in his lap to go over the list. "Let's make some bentos huh? Tonkatsu would be good for it, and those cute little sausages.." 

Ft’s hand is resting on your hip and he's pressing his face into you, nuzzling gently as he nods along, enjoying the comfort of you and how simple life feels for once. 

Goku

ALSO, SNACKS

Hyper kid in a candy store

Gets lost easily because he finds himself staring at things and reading labels and just getting too distracted

Most of the time he's lowkey zoned out. 

Or he's trying to make friends and conversations with like everyone (or they're trying to make friends with him lmao)

Makes kids laugh while their moms are shopping. Its really cute when you hear a baby giggle and turn around to see Goku with his cheeks blown out and his thumbs in his ears.. (maybe got a teeny baby fever after that)

Has kids following him around like a duckling, playing games with them. 

"Hup hup hup!" And there's four kids behind him with Styrofoam swords from the kids section going "hup hup hup!" And they're all excited and Goku puts his hands on his hips and turns back to the little ones. "Good! Good! You're all getting it! You're all gonna be strong just like Uncle Goku right?"

A chorus of happy yelps as Goku throws his hands up and the kids follow suit in excitement. 

As sweet as Goku is, I'd say only take him when you have extra time to kill and you aren't that tired because Goku will wander off, will get caught up talking. You'll be there an extra hour or so than planned.

But he's sweet and goofy and lifting all the heavy things and being a gentleman the best he can the entire time. 

If there's an inside food court inside you can expect him to be by it at some point. 

Is also good at telling if food is bad or not simply by smell. You're sometimes giggling and sometimes embarrassed when he picks up a cut of meat and gives it a big sniff, nostrils wide. But you're thankful when he can tell you if fish sitting on the cooler has been out too long and is no good. 

You probably end up buying a lot of stuff you didn't plan to because of Goku tossing foods into the cart and going "ooh that would be good!"

You have to chastise him to leave the frozen section alone and bribe him with the fact you can cook it better and it'll last longer. 

You show him where non perishables are in case you ever need him to pick something up for you like toiletries or things of that nature.

He's good at memorizing it by step and routine. Walk with him enough to the same places and muscle memory will work for him. 

Bonus: Hanging at Walmart at midnight with Goten and Trunks Would Include:

Lots of laughter

Goten twirling hula hoops around his arms and then it flies off and knocks some shit off the shelves

The three of you hurriedly tried to put everything back. Goten and Trunks shove the shit back up there

You tell them to check the labels, the air pump is over the price tag that says bubble machine. 

You guys buy the bubble machines and a healthy amount of ammo (we save this for later)

Goten picking matching pajamas for the three of you and Trunks picking out coordinated outfits. 

Tossing one of those airy plastic balls around in the kids section, it goes ponk! Everytime it hits the floor. It's also way too light and the boys have heavy hands so. Goten smacks it down once and it bursts.

You freak out a bit and trunks says to just shove it under the other balls because nobody would notice. 

You and goten are both gaping because 1. He can afford to pay for it (and so can the two of you).  2. Really!? With his status and he wanna act bad!?

Y'all walking through the toy aisles and you reminiscing about the toys that remind you of your childhood.

The boys talking about theirs and their Pokémon collections (cause yall know they had em)

Yall playing hot potato with the mini Wobbuffet plushie (sorry lil buddy you got served hot and ready like a lil Caesars pizza 😔)

Okayokay outta the toys section. Yall make ya way to the tech and games section and Trunks eyes light up a lil bit. You call him a nerd. Trunks takes it fucking proudly.

"Yeah and I wouldn't be able to fix your overheating laptop if I wasn't." He flexes his arm to show the muscle and smirks at you. "And I'm a pretty damn strong one too!"

You laugh and Gotens ass has already slithered away to go play around on one of the phones. You and Trunks follow and Trunks ends up telling you both the pros and cons of each company and the products. 

Because you know he likes to talk and you love him, you ask him about the different specs and what they mean in layman's terms and Trunks is more than happy to explain it, how it benefits or harms, and if it's actually any good or not.

You and goten like that one pic of that guy passionately talking and that lil dude laid out on the floor just smiling at him. Yeah. That's yall whenever Trunks gets passionate.

You stand in the middle and hold both their hands and give squeezes, yall be tryna play games and shit but Gotens ass squeezes a lil too hard and has to kiss your hand cause like his daddy, he forgets his strength sometimes. (Like ofc this is dbz. So you strong too but damn you weren’t ready)

Gotens lips are soft when they brush your knuckles and your face warms. You snatch your hand back and flail a little and point to the book section.

Trunks is still holding your other hand though and he raises his eyebrows at Goten who sticks his tongue out at him and follows your lead.

Y'all. Really. Out. Here. Sitting crossed legged in a circle with each of ya knees touching and books spread out. Yall treat the book section like a bookstore but Goten and Trunks are so ripped the employees are too scared to say shit so they let y'all be. (Plus, yall have kindly put the books back on their respective shelves.) 

After yall are bored of that you traverse the clothing section and you pick out matching onesies for the three of you. 

"Okay but like can't we get the Winnie the pooh onesie?"

"Ohh it's kinda cute! I wouldn't mind! Whaddya say Trunks?" Goten slaps a hand on the other man's back and Trunks eye twitches and he feels the material of it.

"I.. guess it wouldn't be too bad but, hm. Winnie the pooh is your choice?"

You pout and slap his arm softly. "Yes! What! You don't like him?"

Trunks grins then pinches and pulls your cheek. "Nah! You're just cute! Aww still liking Winnie?" He teases and you're batting his hand away and pouting

"Fine then none at all!" You huff and puff off and Trunks raises his arms. 

"Aww c'mon! I was just joking!" He calls after you and Goten is shaking his head with his arms crossed.

"That was a bad move bro!"

"Oh shut it Bubbles stan."

Goten gasps. "Hey!!!"

Eventually yall regroup and Trunks is stuffing your arms with a Chameleon Squishmallow and hugging you from behind, tickling you until you finally forgive him. 

Y'all buy a couple snacks and then head outside. You're undoing the bindings on the bubble guns and spending the rest of the night in this mostly empty parking lot shooting each other with bubbles, and using the Styrofoam swords that Goten had picked up and playfully whacking eachother with them. 

Honestly a bunch of young adults just having fun. 

[forgotteneabha]

IM LAUGH alaric legit like 'which sounds worse? marrying my star-crossed crush's best friend and thus being forced to see her, all the time, even when we ~aren't at family functions while tryna navigate not hurting my brother, my wife, or my crush and knowing i'll be a lil sad forever bc things'll never be quite how i wanted them to be...or having valentina as a mother-in-law???????' jk jk no but honestly poor alaric!!!!! his whole situation honestly sucks!!!!

but honestly i do think that, if marriage were ever to go ahead between them, or whatever, she'd legit do her best to be a good wife to him/mother to his children, etc!!!! obv she'd ~also do her best to be a good lady to farrington AND to the ppl of hanthom and that lil slip of land in the north, and the general land of astaira etc, and im sure those things would conflict from time to time, but it wouldn't stop her from trying!!!! laksdjfkljsdkjfsf that awk moment when ur biggest struggle in ur relationship is whether to support your beloved nephew in his quest to become ruler of the known world...or to liberate ur wife and her bestie/ur crush's homeland and thus thwart said nephew???? *oof*

ok but in terms of eabha's behavior, i do think...like...i feel like she's clear about it, but also not bc, like, she treats other ppl similarly???? ksldjafkjdsf what do i mean by this...ok so i think eabha's honestly a pr warm and open person and, not to quote lizzie bennet, but 'she dearly loves to laugh,' so like i def think she flirts but also like...idk that she's the best ~at it all the time so i think she probs inadverntely leaves him in that 'wait was she flirting or just being funny/friendly???' sorta headspace sometimes bc idk that she's as clear as ~she thinks she is bc like she'll do smth romantic but then undercut it w teasing/laughter and so its like 'wait was that a joke or not?'

i do think she's in her head abt like...a loT of this, frankly, and she feels weird hunting somebody down basically, etc, so if it becomes obv to her that he's interested, i think she'll ease into things a lil morebc she'll feel less like a snake...she's never tried to catch a dude for his money/status/etc before, never thought she would, never thought well of those who did, etc, and lbr its just not her natural state so like...idk that she's that good at it, but im thinking she's maybe got some ambassadorial bg in her repertoire (incoming thought -- maybe they've met before? tho if so they were probs rivals in that scenario bc she was tryna convince ppl to join eilia against roderick klasdjfkjdsf but anyway!!) so like she falls back on some of ~those lessons but lbr presenting the case of why you ought to ally w eilia against roderick isn't esp sexy so yeah??? i think she's tryna feel her way through this and i def think she stumbles just as often as she doesn't frankly hahahaha

HE DOESN'T NEED 2 GIRLS RODERICK TRYNA MARRY ALKJSFKLJSDF ;klefjkasldjf ok so real talk: i don't think roderick will notice sonya until arthur does, and she's thus presented in roderick's mind as a future potential empress!!! which means she must be ~his!!!! ladies that catch edmund or arthur's eye re: marriage will, yikes-ishly enough, also in so doing catch roderick's eye, if the boys are ~srs abt marrying them (SOBS) fortunately for sonya, arthur's riding that aria train and so far he aint lookin back/looking for a wife sooooo she's def safe from him at least as far ahead as i can see atm? who knows what might happen but yeah, for the foreseeable future i think its safe to say that unless ~edmund starts thinking abt marrying sonya, she's gonna be ok and roderick barely knows who she is asdklfjklsdfj

that makes a ton of sense and, honestly, looking at it that way, eabha ~would be a great fit bc she'd frankly be a better duchess of farrington than ~mrs varmont~ hahahah i mean she'd defff try, and her actions in both cases would come out of the same idealistic vision for a better future etc, but like the whole varmont ideology is so abhorrent foreign to her that she'd def be on his case a lot abt the things roderick's doing that alaric should be tryna talk him out of etc bc as nobles its their duty to safeguard the ppl etc etc etc she's astairan through and through!! but yeah i ~do think she's good at being a lady and running a place smoothly and negotiating trade deals etc etc but yeah she'd def give him a hard time too alkjdsfkljsdjf just ask finn ;D

ok so, obv this is different if farrington is ~in astaira, but just for the purposes of answering the question...imma assume for the moment that its ~not

oof! yeahhhh while, even w it just being a political match, having her husband be in love w her bff would deffff suck but honestly!!!! i think leaving astaira would be the much ~bigger hurdle for eabha bc she's sworn to look after her ppl and that's what she's doing w this marriage! and she can def put up w personal pain to do that, but she can't surrender her ppl!! i do think if smth were worked out where, like, eabha could rest assured knowing her ppl would be taken care of if she left astaira, tho, she'd do it even if it meant never going home again (bc astaira will always be her home!) bc she is ultimately duty oriented and will do what it takes to see her duty done and she's ultimately a willing sacrifice for her ppl if that's what she has to be, so yeah there are circumstances where she'd be willing to leave but yeah those specific parameters would have to be met ~by the marriage itself (if, say, alaric set up a trusted stewart for northern calleary and ciara had hanthom or smth like that yknow? as part of the conditions of the marriage or whatever) but, yeah, short of that!!! she's not leaving!!! ksdjafkjsdf

ooc | Alaric & Eabha

I'm not sure how obvious Eabha is that she's interested in Alaric, but honestly this just might be something he'd consider tbh??

I do think that Alaric feels like he needs to take a wife and I think w/ all of the complicated feelings he has towards Astaira, that maybe taking an Astairan wife would be good to help promote good Varmont/Astaira relationships/??

While he enjoys flirting w/ Sonya, I feel like he honestly doesn't think having to deal w/ her mom is worth it plus, idk if Roderick really is interested in her or not?? But if he was, Alaric would also back off (he doesn't need to be into 2 girls that Roderick is trying to marry!!!)

I also think he believes that Eabha would be a good fit because she grew up expecting to run her own estate and he is looking for a woman who could effectively be his steward, since he knows that he likely will nEVER be settled and always pulled away on the next conquest his brother decides they shall go on and he wants to know that his home/children/etc are in good hands!

I do think that the only hitch in this plan, is whether or not Farrington is here in Astaira or in the og empire, because I feel like Eabha wouldn't want to leave??? Honestly, all of her siblings would be welcome to live w/ her, if they wanted, but yeah I'm sure that complicates things!! (not to mention that Alaric is carrying a silent torch for one of Eabha's best friends #notawkward)

[frodo-with-glasses]

What are your headcanons for the rest of Bergil's family? When I was younger I always imagined that maybe his mom was pregnant when she was sent away during the war, and then after she came back Bergil had a little sister. I think Iorlas is his mom's brother? and his grandfather in Lossarnach is his mom's dad. Iorlas and Beregond get along great. No idea what Beregond's side of the family looks like aside from "dad exists". Any thoughts? ~meg

Okay so I DID write an answer to this a couple days ago when you first sent it, Meg, but then tumblr ate my reply and I was too frustrated and busy and in pain to try to write it again. BUT I'M BACK!! LET'S TALK ABOUT MY FAVORITE GONDOR FAMILY!

Oh dude I am so glad to hear I'm not the only one who headcanons that Bergil has a baby sister! I dunno what it is about Beregond, but he just gives me "has a daughter" vibes, y'know? Like dads who've only raised boys are one way, but dads who've raised girls just have something different about their personalities, and I think Beregond has that.

Originally I thought that Bergil's baby sis was just a couple months old when the women and children had to leave Minas Tirith, but I think I like your take on it even more...just the constant anxiety thrumming in the back of Beregond's mind like "my wife is with child and I have to get out of this war alive so I can meet my new son or daughter" is just.....mmm. *chef's kiss* Tasty tasty angst, you love to see it.

*hums under my breath* Gotta go, gotta get the job done, gotta start a new nation, gotta meet my son—TAKE THE BULLETS OUT YO GUN—

I think it's a safe guess to say that Iorlas is Bergil's maternal uncle. Families in LotR tend to pass down similar names (Baranor, Beregond, Bergil...Eomund, Eomer, Eowyn...Arathorn, Aragorn...you get the drift), so everyone on the paternal side of the family—that is, Beregond's side—probably has names that start with B.

.......Which then gives us a bit of a clue what Beregond's wife's name might be!! It probably starts with "Io"! And their daughter's name might too. 8-D

(LotR language nerds, what's a good feminine suffix for a Gondorian name?? Asking for a friend. Totally don't need it for fic writing or anything *cough* And don't say Ioreth, that one's already taken.)

It's also probably a safe bet that the maternal side of the family comes from Lossnarch. Beregond was probably born and raised in Minas Tirith, and when he got married, his wife came to live with him in the city.

ABSOLUTELY Beregond gets along great with his in-laws, how could he not?? :-D Bergil seems to speak of Iorlas as if he's a constant fixture in his life, so Uncle Iorlas probably comes to Minas Tirith pretty often. Maybe on business? Perhaps he has a job that requires a lot of travelling, like a postal courier? And sometimes Beregond and Bergil and the whole family to go Lossnarch to visit the grandparents too. Bergil thinks Uncle Iorlas is the coolest guy ever (second to Dad).

As for Beregond's side of the family...I dunno. I feel like if he had any brothers on active duty, we would've heard about it. But I also doubt that Beregond was an only child, given how most ancient cultures tend to place value on large families. Maybe he only had sisters?? Would explain a bit about him, actually. If his father and mother are still alive, said father was probably too old to be of any use in the City when the war started, and both of them left with the other refugees early on.

......I don't know why I feel like Beregond's mother is dead. Probably just because most of the women in LotR are either dead or missing. I really do feel like she's not around anymore, even though I have absolutely no evidence to substantiate it.

But I can DEFINITELY tell you 1000% that there was a heckin' baby boom in Gondor after the War of the Ring—it is an observable trend that humanity's first response in the aftermath of wars and other widescale tragedies is, for SOME REASON, to procreate—so Bergil very likely had a new baby sibling within a year or two after the Ring was destroyed. Hahaha giggidy