#you could take any character in that game and go 'they were secretly a robot' and yeah sure ig

[my-thoughts-and-junk]

Anyway I think the twist being the main character was what they despised all along fucks actually

[everythingismadeofchaos]

Couple things. These are ideas for Stellaris.

Well maybe three.

First of all, you can include a text file with each save file; note functionality within the game. That is, you start playing, and then maybe you start taking notes for yourself in this little file, and then when you save the game the file is saved with it, so that when you reload the game a year later you can see what you were planning on doing. While you're playing you can pull up a note window and it's just controlling a text file directly. I try to encode notes for myself in the save game names but there's not much room, and anyway I just continue the game when I start it. I just think this would be cool.

Secondly. Is there some way to change in the game what happens when specific notifications pop up? If I have a newly founded colony notification I would like the game to pause. There are probably other notifications this would be good for.

If you could alphabetize the planets in the slave market menu, that would be great. Or give us the list in some other order. Or better yet let us change the order depending on preference, or search the whole list with the planet name, or sort by size, or sort by something. And let us double-click the entry in that list to open the planet window. That would be very helpful.

I think you guys are underplaying your hand with the leaders. I'm playing a big giant sprawling easy game just to explore the functionality and try to learn more what's going on and what I should be aiming for and I'm using a huge number of leaders. I never knew the names of my leaders or really paid that much attention when I only had a few, because the number is so restricted. Now I've got this big sprawling giant empire and I could really use like a couple dozen more and I really notice what their strengths are and so forth. I have so many and I'm using the crap out of them, but they're costing me all these penalties, but I don't really need them; I just think they're cool and I want to have them. This is engagement with the game and kind of fun. It reminds me of when I was playing Star Wars: Rebellion in 1999 and you could send armies and ships and stuff all over the Galaxy, but you could also send Han Solo or Princess Leia or a whole bunch of guys who only had names on their action figures, but they were real guys with real names in the movies and it promoted the lore. If you would use whatever system you're using to generate people's names and generate 10,000 or 20,000 of them with permanent starting statistics, people would start to recognize them and notice them over and over again, game after game, especially if you increase the number of aliens that are available. Hell, give every race in the game that's not currently playing the current a 1% chance for a leader; then you hire him and find the whole galaxy but there's this mysterious culture somewhere in the Galaxy that nobody knows where it is and you spend the whole game trying to solve the mystery of how there is no human empire and there never was any human empire because you're playing an all robot playthrough or something, I don't know if you can even do that, but somehow these humans cropped up from somewhere. No population, no home planets, just some guy, eg Gaius Baltar.

I feel like if you had permanent characters like this you might start getting fan fiction. Is there Stellaris fan fiction? I don't know. Then maybe in 5 years there would be a movie deal. It would also give you the opportunity for more sci-fi in jokes because you could give people names that were secretly hints at other pieces of sci-fi or fantasy or even anything at all, like having a commander who's really good at hunting one particular type of space fauna and his name is Ahab. Or maybe Quint, the guy from Jaws. Or if you can't refer to a specific person, like you can't put Captain Kirk in the game obviously, you could have somebody who's secretly an homage to that person, like having a Captain Church whose icon is a brown haired white guy. "Kirk" is the word "church" in some other language; I can't remember which one and I don't want to lose my train of thought to go look it up but just as another in joke you have his opening line when you get him hired is he talks with an accent in that language. I think that would be funny, because almost nobody would get it and then somebody would and they would tell everybody and the information would spread. You could put a lot of in jokes in that way. The robot from Lost in Space. Hal 9000. Could be fun.

God I am having so much fucking fun playing this game. I don't get stoned all the time or anything, just once or twice a week for the anxiety, but I've discovered I can still stay functional enough to play the game if I microdose and play at a low difficulty level. And I am having a super fun time, let me tell you.

Sorry this is so long-winded. I can't play this game for more than a month or two, but I always find myself going back to it, and there are only three or four video games I can actually enjoy these days. Cranking the difficulty down just makes this so relaxing and fun and I can just enjoy all the content and interactions with my neighbors, who are all friendly because it's so easy for me to be heavily armed.

Thanks so much you guys for making this game

[prokopetz]

Get in the Fucking Robot

A competitive RPG for 3–5 players

The Apocalypse is coming, and nothing can stop it – nothing, that is, except your giant robot. All it needs is a willing pilot. Unfortunately, you’re all deeply dysfunctional people, and no matter who steps up, it’s sure to end in disaster; for yourself, certainly, and very likely for the world as well. It’s not like you have any choice, though. In the end, one of you must get in the fucking robot.

The Game in Brief

Get in the Fucking Robot is a competitive, GMless RPG where your objective is to lose the game. Play proceeds in a series of turns; the first player to achieve the target score gets in the fucking robot.

To be clear, this is a bad thing. It does not end well for you. From an in-character perspective, your character may very much want to get in the fucking robot, but as a player your goal is to prevent this outcome by any means necessary. You can do this both by avoiding scoring opportunities for yourself, and by forcing other players to score.

Once it’s been determined who gets in the fucking robot, a short epilogue follows in which the losing players collaborate to describe the horrible things that happen to the lucky winner.

What You’ll Need

Get in the Fucking Robot requires the following paraphernaila:

Nine six-sided dice (that is, 9d6).

Six index cards. Write the word “Enthusiasm” on two of them, and leave the other side blank – make sure the ink doesn’t bleed through. Do the same with the words “Empathy” and “Vulnerability”, so you have three pairs, one for each word.

A sheet of paper for each player. Each player should draw three large circles on their paper, and clearly label them “Apathy”, “Alienation” and “Self-Loathing”, respectively. Also mark a tally column labelled “Self-Confidence”.

Nine tokens (coins, beads, etc.) per player.

Your Role

Each player chooses one of the following roles. Rules for creating your own role might happen if I ever turn this into a serious game, but don’t hold your breath!

The Hero

This isn’t your first rodeo, and you’ve Seen Some Shit that makes you very sure you don’t want to get in the fucking robot – if only you could convince yourself that you have a choice in the matter.

Apathy: 3; Alienation: 5; Self-Loathing: 1

The Rival

You’re brash, loudmouthed, and obviously the most suitable candidate to get in the fucking robot. Or that’s what you tell anyone who will listen, anyway; deep down, you’re not sure if you believe it yourself.

Apathy: 1; Alienation: 3; Self-Loathing: 5

The Pro

You were made to get in the fucking robot, possibly literally. For you it’s strictly business, which is exactly why your heart’s not really in it. Can you really save the world just by going through the motions?

Apathy: 5; Alienation: 3; Self-Loathing: 1

The Novice

You only found out about apocalypses and giant robots yesterday. They say you have that special something that’s needed to get in the fucking robot, but surely there’s been some mistake?

Apathy: 5; Alienation: 1; Self-Loathing: 3

The Mascot

You’re aces at emotional support, but secretly you resent being taken for granted. You’ve never thought it might be you to get in the fucking robot, and you wouldn’t be mentally prepared if you did!

Apathy: 3; Alienation: 1; Self-Loathing: 5

The Imposter

You’re not here to prevent the Apocalypse. Quite the opposite, in fact. It’ll be a bad time if you get in the fucking robot. Trouble is, you kind of don’t want to destroy the world; it’s where you keep all your stuff!

Apathy: 1; Alienation: 5; Self-Loathing: 3

Playing the Game

Put your sheet of paper in front of you, and place the number of tokens assigned by your role into each circle. The number and type of tokens you possess must be publicly displayed to the other players at all times.

Play proceeds in a series of turns. Beginning with the biggest anime fan of the group and working clockwise, each player takes a turn, as follows:

1. Choose another player. You are not obliged to choose any particular player, but you may not choose the same player who was chosen on the previous turn. (i.e., the same player cannot be chosen two turns in a row – though they can participate in two turns in a row if one of those turns was their own!) You and the player you chose are the focus players for this turn.

2. Briefly frame a scene where the two of you interact. This could be a training session, a team building exercise, a beach episode, a weirdly intimate piano recital, etc.

3. Each focus player picks up one of the sets of index cards, and secretly selects one of the three attitudes written thereon. Place your chosen card face-down in front of you, so that only you know what it says. Do not touch your card again until the instructions say so.

(Your current pools do not prevent you from choosing any attitude you want; for example, a character with high Apathy may still select Enthusiasm. All characters in Get in the Fucking Robot are very good at fronting.)

4. Play out the established scene. Your play must be consistent with the attitude you secretly chose in the previous step, though you’re allowed to send mixed signals.

5. Non-focus players may insert themselves into the scene at any plausible opportunity to lend emotional support to one side or the other.

6. When the scene reaches a natural stopping point, each focus player picks up three dice. If a non-focus player lent you emotional support, pick up one additional die per player who supported you.

7. You may now spend any number of tokens from a single pool (i.e., Apathy, Alienation or Self-Loathing). Tokens function as anti-dice; each token subtracts one die from your hand. However, do not adjust your dice yet.

8. Each focus player reveals their face-down card. Each attitude negates a particular pool: Enthusiasm negates Apathy, Vulnerability negates Alienation, and Empathy negates Self-Loathing. If the other player’s attitude negates the pool you spent from, the tokens are discarded. They’re still expended, they just don’t subtract any dice!

9. Reduce the number of dice in your hand by the number of tokens you spent (as long as they weren’t negated). Your dice may be reduced to zero in this way.

10. Each focus player rolls their dice and totals the results. If you rolled zero dice, your total is zero. The player with the highest total marks two points of Self-Confidence. If there’s a tie, each player marks one point of Self-Confidence instead.

11. Conclude the scene appropriately.

At this point, if any player’s Self-Confidence total is more than double the number of players (e.g., seven or more in a three-player game, nine or more in a four-player game, etc.) proceed to the Endgame, below. Otherwise, discard any spent tokens, reassemble the two sets of index cards, and the next player in the rotation now takes a turn.

The Endgame

The Endgame is triggered when one player receives sufficient emotional validation (i.e., Self-Confidence points) to get in the fucking robot.

That player frames a final scene in which they demonstrate their resolve and say goodbye in whatever manner best suits their established relationship with the other players.

The winning player then gets in the fucking robot. The other players collaboratively describe their horrible fate.

[mk-wizard]

Big Hero 6 The Series: It could have been better

Hello, friends. Today, I will be analyzing a TV series based on a movie that I fell in love with for its colourful themes, deep plot, compelling characters, great CGI and memorable messages. Before I get into it, I want to take a moment to say that I have quit doing videos. They are too big of a pain in the petunia to make and I write better than I speak, so I will stick to writing essays, reviews and more. Anyway, onto the analysis.

All I can say about Big Hero 6 the series is that it had a great concept, it presented some great ideas and tried hard to be a cartoon of the times, but it could have and should have been a lot better. The show’s downfall all centers around trying too hard to be kid friendly which makes the shame sting all the more because Big Hero 6 was already kid friendly even with its dark themes, sharp edges and intelligent writing. If anything, even the brightest kid friendly cartoons (Steven Universe, She-Ra, etc.) had those things and actually benefitted from them. By needlessly trying too hard, character development got scrapped, the edges were all smoothed out, storytelling was subpar, the humour was too silly and the executive meddling in the end produced a dismal final season. However, I don’t want this analysis to be one lengthy negative rant about how awful the series was because in its defense, awful is an unfair word. It did have potential and ideas which are worth carrying over to a reboot that I hope will be done someday in the future. Also, we should root for a reboot because Big Hero 6 would not be the first story that needs it before striking gold. Just look at how many times Spider-Man was rebooted in film before MCU found the version that worked. Anyway, I will list all the things in Big Hero 6 that could have been better in my opinion;

1- Go easy on the laughs and be more generous with the action. - I love adding comedy to my own writing because I think a good sense of humour makes everything better, but Big Hero 6 is not a stand up comedy routine. It is a superhero story where we expect action, suspense and life or death situations that are to be taken seriously first. The comedy should be for relief and with the right timing. Also, the chibi cutscenes and having characters act like fools aren’t funny. Ren and Stimpy are the exception not the standard and their way of making you laugh doesn’t fit an action series. In a show as big as Big Hero 6, real life physics and danger matters.

2- Make the villains menacing and gritty. - I admit that after having a movie villain like Yokai who was the stuff of nightmares, it is going to be a challenging act to follow, but it was obvious that the writers were trying especially with some villains who could have easily gone into some dark relatable territory. For example, Mr. Sparkles (the gentleman in the photo above) embodies social media and Internet personalities. Right off the bat, you have a long list of things which embody the dark side of that like scams, fraud, using social media to dox or harass, driving people to suicide, online predators, the Internet personalities being very depressed people in real life, and much more horrifying things. When you stop and look at it, Mr. Sparkles even looks like the Joker which hints how dark and scary he could have been if the stops were removed. The same goes for enemies like Hardlight who embodies online gaming, Liv with cloning, Obake an amoral and insane scientist, and Trina and Noodle Burger Boy (more on him later) being evil robots. Globby especially should have been painted and written in much darker colours rather being played off for laughs because he has many parallels with Clay Face. The only two villains who I can say were supposed to be campy, charming and comical were Baron Von Steamer and Supersonic Sue because they were a satire of the Adam West style villains.

The rest of them needed to be dark and threatening including Mr. Sparkles. In fact, I would love a rebooted version of Mr. Sparkles who gives me the heebie-jeebies. Going back to Noodle Burger Boy, I must confess that I was actually excited when I heard that he was going to be the main villain of the final season because I thought he was going to fulfill his master’s final wish and as a reminder, Noodle Burger Boy was based on a super robot for military purposes.

It would have been fantastic if Noodle Burger Boy was upgraded into a full military war machine with a new threatening look. For that, I think all of the villains deserve to be rebooted and have their full potential unlocked for better or for worse.

3- A show about geniuses merits genius level art quality. - I am usually forgiving towards art styles, but in the case of Big Hero 6, the oversimplified style with minimal details and lack of textures did not suit the show. The characters blend in with the background which makes them look flat and the special effects were extremely dulled down. I also know for a fact that Disney can do a lot better than this because I saw how superbly Tangled the Series was drawn.

You can see and almost feel the difference in quality, the number of layers and level of detail between the two styles. I think there was no excuse Big Hero 6 was not done in the same style and at the same level if not better as Tangled.

3- Don’t dumb down or flanderize amazing characters. - I absolutely detest it when characters are flanderized because it makes them one dimensional and grating. For example, Go Go is tough as nails and extremely calm, but she is not cold or hesitant towards helping her friends. She doesn’t require very special episodes for us to know that. If anything, the movie version of Go Go reminded me a lot of Garnet in how she deconstructed the broody character. She isn’t cold or emotionless. Just calm and mature. Another good example was how Honey Lemon was rewritten to be overly positive to the point of toxicity, naïve and oblivious with a juvenile obsession with stickers. Then you have poor Fred who was rewritten to be an incompetent fool. The spark that makes Big Hero 6 shine is that they are a team of geniuses meaning they are all intelligent. Even Fred is genius in his own way just not a scientific one. He has a vivid imagination, he is resourceful and can get himself out of tight spots. Please, don’t turn characters into dummies especially if their intelligence is a part of them. It doesn’t make them better or funnier. It ruins them.

4- Tadashi needs closure and honour. - I am all for Hiro making peace with the loss of his brother, but Tadashi is to the Big Hero 6 team what Uncle Ben was to Spider-Man. His loss was the catalyst if not the reason. He should never be forgotten. Moreover, there was never any true closure to him especially with the possibility that he may still be alive up in the air. After all, like Callaghan, his body was never found and it turned out that Callaghan was still alive.

With that said, who is to say that Tadashi was not secretly still alive and just hiding or being hidden? This is something that Disney really needed to clear up if not for the fans, then at least as a service to such an important character. Never just forget about them.

5- The format can only be episodic with a deep plots, continuity and character development. - Random episodes with a mere monster of the day is an outdated format which doesn’t fit Big Hero 6′s modern and bright setting. In seasons 1 and 2, when the episodes were plot heavy with character development, the series shined brightest. It also helped move the story along, but with the final season, plot was removed, closure was abandoned or poorly written if any was given, and characters were disallowed from growing. A good example at how plot and character development could have made this series and its characters better was the relationship between Hiro and Megan. Would it have truly survived or would they have broken up?

Would Richardson Mole have eventually lost interest in his obsession with besting and bullying Fred or would his obsession consume him compelling him to become a super villain? I do see quite a few similarities between Mole and Reverse Flash.

Then you have Karmi who is in my opinion, the biggest wild card of the bunch. She was intentionally introduced as an arrogant, prickly and unlikable yet complex character who rivaled Hiro bitterly.

Yet had a huge crush on his alter ego and as time went on, started to grow up and even form a friendship with Hiro. What would have happened further down the road with her? Would she have become a super hero herself? Or maybe even another love interest for Hiro kind of like how Black Cat is for Spider-Man?

Is Obake really gone?

What does the future hold Diana (Liv’s clone), Liv herself or the Sycorax the genetics company?

Is Alistair Krei going to become an ally to Big Hero 6 or an antagonist? There is also the issue at how little we know about the other Big Hero 6 characters other than Fred, Hiro and Baymax. What are Honey Lemon, Wasabi and Go Go’s backstories? These questions matter and while not every mystery can be solved, leaving none of them solved is lazy writing.

6- Executives, kindly stay out of the writing and any other part of the creative process. - I’m sorry, execs, but there is no nice way to say it. History itself proves that every time executives got involved in the creative process of any media, it got worse not better. Leave the writing to the creative team and the execs should only handle the legal stuff. Please. We understand that TV is a business, but writing itself is not. It is an art which you just don’t have a talent for. Let the creative people do their thing with the freedom necessary and you do your thing, deal? Deal.

7- Focus on Hiro and Baymax. - The are the main characters so keep them at the heart of the series no matter what happens around them. That is all I can say.

And that sums up all the things that could have made Big Hero 6 the series better, but this is all just my opinion. What is yours?

PS: I am well aware that the Big Hero 6 series is being retconned because a new series called Baymax is in the works as well as the long awaited sequel to the first movie. I am looking forward to both with an open mind. PPS: I also am aware that some people liked this show the way it was including the art style and I am cool with that. An analysis for art that includes cartoons is never right or wrong. It is solely based on opinion. I may have thought this series could have been better, but there are people who make arguments that it could have been worse.

[elizabeth-mitchells]

follow you to the beginning (just to relive the start) - Sam/Deena  - Fake Dating AU

Chapters: 1/? Fandom: Fear Street Trilogy (TV) Rating: Mature Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Samantha "Sam" Fraser/Deena Johnson, Samantha "Sam" Fraser & Deena Johnson, Samantha "Sam" Fraser/Peter (Fear Street Part 1: 1994), Samantha "Sam" Fraser & Simon Kalivoda, Samantha "Sam" Fraser & Kate Schmidt (Fear Street), Deena Johnson & Kate Schmidt, Deena Johnson & Simon Kalivoda, Minor or Background Relationship(s) Characters: Deena Johnson, Samantha "Sam" Fraser (Fear Street), Kate Schmidt (Fear Street), Simon Kalivoda, Josh Johnson (Fear Street), Peter (Fear Street Part 1: 1994), Background & Cameo Characters Additional Tags: Alternate Universe, Canon Lesbian Relationship, Canon Lesbian Character, Slow Burn, Childhood Friends, Childhood Memories, Best Friends, High School, Angst, Humor, Fluff, First Love, Eventual Happy Ending, Friends to Enemies, Enemies to Lovers, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Mutual Pining, Other Additional Tags to Be Added

Sam and Deena are next-door neighbors, and they inevitably and enthusiastically become best friends... until childhood gives way to tragedy, grudges, and regret.

By the time they make it to high school, Sam and Deena are still next-door neighbors but also sworn enemies... until high school introduces bigger threats that they will need to face together.

Faking a relationship might be a bad idea. But it might be the only way for Sam and Deena to understand their shared past and their feelings for each other.

Chapter 1:

Sam and Deena became best friends during one perfect summer day when they were seven years old. In Shadyside, however, perfect days weren’t meant to exist. The only reason little Sam Fraser finally had the time and freedom to spend time with her next-door neighbor was because her parents were caught in the first big fight of hundreds more to come. A part of Sam would associate both events as one and the same for a long, long time. The beginning of her friendship with Deena and the downfall of the Fraser family. In contrast, Deena was living some of the best days of her life. Days that she would treasure and idolize, perhaps more than she should have, for many years to come. Her mother was alive, her father was sober, her little brother was safe in their hands. She had all the time in the world to go out into the backyard, lay on the ground, and look for shapes in the clouds. She had been doing that for a while then a shadow suddenly appeared over her.

“What are you doing?” Sam asked. Her voice was still trembling slightly from the way she had run out of her house crying. Her eyes were red and she had a runny nose, but she looked genuinely curious to understand what her neighbor was doing.

Deena didn’t reply at first. She couldn’t. She was too shaken by the impact of Sam’s first impression on her. It wasn’t the very first time they met, of course. But their parents were usually hovering above them. So far they had never been alone together. They were very different kids, it was easy to tell with just one look. Not just physically, with Deena’s wild mane of curly brown hair and Sam’s being straight and blond, Deena’s brown eyes being warm and guarded meanwhile Sam’s blue eyes cried out her every emotion. It was also about the way Deena was thrown on the grass, comfortable and taking as much space as possible in her slightly oversized clothes that she picked herself, as long as they were in sale, while her mother fondly chuckled and followed her around the store in spite of which gendered aisle her daughter got lost in. Sam was the complete opposite, in her bright pink clothes that were always too loose or too tight because her mother didn’t care to bring her along when buying her clothes and it was made all the more noticeable by the way in which Sam stood tense and awkwardly, uncomfortable from head to toe, her feet restless as if ready to run at any given moment.

The silence between them had stretched out for too long, but Sam was good at waiting. Deena moved to a seated position and took a better look at the girl in front of her. “Fraser,” she blurted out. She couldn’t remember her neighbor’s name, but she knew her parents were Mr. and Mrs. Fraser of the constant frowns.

“Um, Johnson?” Sam tilted her head. She didn’t understand this game of calling out each other’s last names.

“I’m Deena,” the brunette said and jumped to her feet, not bothering to brush away the grass stuck to her clothes.

“Sam,” the other girl offered her hand.

Deena laughed, but she was troubled. She wanted to laugh so much more. There was this weird girl in front of her, obviously a second away from bursting into tears again, probably from the weight of the glittery pink ribbon on her head, and she was offering Deena her hand in greeting. However, her laughter died in Deena’s throat. The instinct to tease was, for once, overpowered by something new and somewhat unfamiliar. She didn’t know it was protectiveness, she didn’t understand what it was at all. She only felt a pull on her heart that wanted to make sure her neighbor was okay.

So, Deena shook Sam’s hand. She invited her to lay down with her to watch shapes in the clouds. She didn’t laugh at Sam, she made it her mission to make Sam laugh. Unknowingly, with that innocent handshake, they were starting out together the greatest adventure of their lives, with all the glorious ups and devastating downs that it would include.

It was still early, they had the entire day ahead of them, and under the clear blue Shadyside sky, the world was all theirs. 

They started lying down on the grass, side by side, looking up at the clouds. At first, it was perfect, and fun. Sam’s stomach started aching from how hard she was laughing every time Deena pointed out at the sky and said “That one looks like a butt.” And then Sam would point at a completely unidentifiable cloud and say, “That one looks like a robot.”

“What?!” Deena laughed wholeheartedly. “No, it doesn’t! You weirdo.”

Sam’s laughter dimmed. “Do you think I’m weird?”

“No!” Deena scoffed. “Isn’t that like a compliment?”

The blonde hummed in response. She hadn’t considered that the other girl was just as inexperienced at talking to other girls her age.

For a moment, there was silence between them. Enough silence for Sam to remember the deafening noise of her parents fighting, blaming each other, blaming her, blaming the town. Before she could stop it, Sam was crying again.

“Sam?” Deena called her name. She moved to a seated position and placed a hand on Sam’s shoulder gently. “I’m sorry. I really don’t think you’re that weird.”

“That weird?” Sam chuckled through her tears.

Deena laughed along with her, but she still looked out of her comfort zone dealing with her crying neighbor. “Are you okay?” she asked.

“I’m okay,” Sam wiped her tears away, willing herself to regain her composure as her mother always told her to do. “I just… cry a lot. My dad says it’s because my mom doesn’t have feelings and I have to cry for the both of us.”

“Okay,” Deena nodded, not knowing how to put into words how wrong that sounded. Then she noticed a single blade of grass stuck to Sam’s pretty blonde hair. “Hold on Sam, you have grass on your head,” Deena said, and reached out to take it off.

However, Deena’s hand on her hair made an idea light up in Sam’s mind. She gasped and grabbed Deena’s wrist, holding her in place. “We should make flower crowns!”

“What?!”

“Don’t tell me you don’t know how to do it,” Sam smiled teasingly.

“Of course I do!” Deena scoffed. She was happy to see Sam smile, but she was second-guessing her previous statement about the blonde not being weird. Plus, it turned out not even Sam knew how to make flower crowns. It wasn’t as easy as it seemed. 

The two girls ended up hiding behind flower bushes between their homes. Sam had entertained herself weaving the prettiest flowers she could find in Deena’s curls. Meanwhile, Deena was content pulling blades of grass and unceremoniously letting them fall on Sam’s head. Deena couldn’t understand how Sam could be unbothered by the game. It didn’t take a genius to figure out that Sam didn’t have many friends. In fact, not too long later, Sam whispered, “You’re my first real friend.”

Deena beamed upon hearing the words. She was happy with her parents and baby brother but, secretly, she had always wished for a friend, a girl like her, and here she was, finally. “You’re my only friend too,” Deena replied, a little shyly.

“Really?” Sam’s eyes widened.

“Yeah,” Deena chuckled.

The blonde hummed thoughtfully. “I think that makes us best friends,” Sam said.

“Oh yeah?” Deena asked. She received a confident nod in response. That made sense to her too. “Then we should celebrate.” She jumped to her feet and offered her hand to Sam, who didn’t hesitate to follow.

The day was long, and there was so much they were dying to show each other. The hours passed by in a sun-bathed blur of childish laughter. They did everything and nothing, jumping without reason, running without destination, rolling in the grass, picking flowers, climbing trees, scratching their knees, and jumping back up into made-up games and fantasy scenarios that they hadn’t ever had a chance to share with anybody.

There were a thousand little moments that years later they would wish they could have immortalized some way. When Deena showed Sam a spider and Sam ran away. When Deena hurt her finger with a thorn from Sam’s mother’s rose bushes, and Sam kissed the afflicted finger and promised she wouldn’t tell anybody Deena cried.

When Deena started climbing the tree at the back of the backyard, Sam started freaking out. “Deena! You’ll hurt yourself!” Sam repeated many times. Deena was thinking Sam sounded older than she really was when she was worried.

“I won’t,” the blonde scoffed, getting comfortable in what actually was a really low branch of the tree. “Besides, if I fall you can catch me!”

“I can try!” Sam said, throwing her arms around her. “But you’ll probably crush me and then we’ll both be dead!”

“Hey! I’m not that heavy!”

Deena’s protest, unfortunately, made her lose her balance. For a moment, she was hanging from the branch of the tree, feeling her heart on her throat. But then Sam’s slender arms were holding on to her legs, as tightly as the little girl was capable of. Deena smiled brightly. She felt surprisingly safe, even if she knew that Sam wasn’t strong enough to literally hold her up. “Sam, let go, it’s okay, I got it,” Deena let her know.

Sam stepped back to let Deena land on her feet, but a second later she was back, wrapping her arms around Deena’s torso this time, holding just as tightly if not more. “You scared me,” Sam mumbled, her voice muffled by the way she had her face pressed against Deena’s shoulder.

“It’s okay,” Deena said. She let her arms fall limply at her sides. She still felt out of her depth with Sam, even after one of the best days of her life. Her instinct told her to make fun of Sam, who was moved near to tears. But her heart stopped her for unknown reasons. Instead, she let her cheek rest on top of Sam’s head. At the time, Deena was taller. “It’s okay,” Deena repeated. “I’m not going anywhere. I’m your best friend, remember? I don’t think I’m allowed to leave you now.”

Sam chuckled and finally dropped her arms. Deena felt a chill at the loss. “Do you promise?” Sam asked.

Deena frowned a little, but continued to smile. “I promise,” she said, finding it increasingly difficult to say not the blonde girl that had stumbled into her personal space earlier that day with tears still in her eyes.

“Okay,” Sam exclaimed. She leaned forward and placed a sweet kiss on Deena’s cheek. She was so excited it nearly threw both of them off balance, and when she pulled back, they were both blushing. But they moved on quickly, that day. Sam took Deena’s hand and started leading her to a different spot in the wide and free space behind their houses. “My mom told me about a spa. It’s a place where they put mud in your face to make you pretty. We should try it.”

“I’m already pretty!” Deena protested.

“Yeah, you are,” Sam shrugged. “But maybe it can help me.”

“You are more than pretty, Sam,” Deena frowned.

That made the blonde girl stop in her tracks. “Do you think so?” She asked Deena, and the brunette nodded enthusiastically. Sam was thoughtful for a moment, but eventually shrugged, and tried to continue with her plans, clearly not completely believing the other girl’s words. She was stopped by Deena a moment later, refusing to go further.

“Hey, you didn’t make the promise too,” Deena pointed out.

“Oh! You’re right,” Sam nodded, very seriously. “Okay then… I promise to always be your best friend, and to never leave you, and… um, is there something else?” She looked up at Deena for guidance.

Deena grinned at her. “No, that’s it. That’s cool.”

The two girls started laughing again, and continued with their games for a long time. They did end up playing with the mud, and then tried to wash it off, creating a bigger mess, with the hose they found behind Deena’s house. 

Toward the end of the day, when the sun started to set, both girls were well aware that their parents would be coming out at any moment to call them back home. They chose to end their first day as best friends exactly how they started it. They lay on the grass in the backyard in between their houses, and they looked up at the infinite sky above them. There weren’t many clouds anymore, but the first stars were showing up in the sky, and they were more than happy to count them one by one. 

That was how it started. One perfect day, and dozens of them just the same. Sam ran away from her house to the backyard every time her parents were having a fight. Deena made her laugh until Sam couldn’t remember crying for anything other reason than pure joy. Sam picked the prettiest flowers she could find and gave them to Deena, and hugged her especially tight every time Deena fell down from the tree she loved to climb. From the Johnsons’ window, Deena’s mom watched them fondly, happy that her daughter had a friend. From the Frasers’ window, Sam’s mom watched them with a frown on her face, upset about Sam ruining her clothes. But they never had reasons to stop them from having fun, they didn’t have any reason to put barriers between their daughters. And the two girls couldn’t imagine a world where they would be anything but the best of friends.

Much like everything in Shadyside, their perfect days would soon come to a bitter end but, even then, it wouldn’t be the end of Sam and Deena’s story.

[my-writings-and-musings]

Hey, if you're still doing those angsty oxygen scenarios, could you do one with Rumble? I know he's not a lost light bot but it would mean a lot to me

He means a lot to me too, anon. Plus as I see it, being a Lost Light bot is a state of mind.

Here's all my previous posts with this popular prompt!

Part One: Here!

Part Two: Here!

Part Three: Here!

Part Four: Here!

Part Five: Here!

Part Six: Here!

Part Seven: You are Here!

Part Eight! Here!

Part Nine: Here!

Part Ten: Here!

Part Eleven: Here!

Part Twelve: Here!

Rumble

·The story of how you both ended up on the Lost Light is a long and rather ridiculous one, but thankfully you're both quite happy now with the way things have turned out. Hanging out and playing video games is one of the more calm and non-destructive things you two do around the ship, and it's an activity he adores having someone to share with, as not too many bots share the hobby. Being absolutely tiny by Cybertronian standards but huge compared to you, he typically encourages you to sit on his lap while you game together, something he claims is only done to ensure you both can see. Being a good sport, you agree so he can keep protecting his reputation as a tough bot who never cuddles anyone, and also because you know he's secretly in need of said cuddles despite his claims otherwise. You're well in to a rather relaxed gaming session when an emergency communication pings both of you.

·Quite open about how annoyed he is, the feeling only grows when the line is barely audible, static blurring all but every other word of what sounds like a rather urgent message. Though he does try to ask for a repeat of what's said, when the feed simply dies he's quite tempted to just ignore it and keep playing games. Admittedly that sounds good to you too, but being on a gigantic alien vessel makes you far less comfortable at the prospect of things being uncertain, as what's minor to the bots can be quite dangerous for you. Initially your gentle insistence on seeing what might be going on only gets an exaggerated groan regarding how it's probably nothing and that the two of you are having fun so who cares? The pouting is something you're rather accustomed to, so you follow a strategy of gentle pushing to get him moving, which results in him growing ever more dramatic until he's lying back on his second hand couch as if getting up would be physically painful.

·A gentle kiss on his nose finally melts away his immature resistance, but only after he blushes like a lamppost and huffs to try and pretend he's not doing it because you've convinced him or anything. With one last sorrowful look at his console, he hefts you into his shoulder and moves out, not willing to wait on your tiny human legs. Though he's obviously grumpy there's still care and consideration in how he walks with you, as he's never going to risk dropping your squishy human self if he can help it.

·Repeated attempts to comm anyone for some information turn up nothing but static, and that leaves both of you quite confused, with the minibot commenting on how odd it is that no one is answering. Being near the living quarters at this time of day means there's no one around to ask, so he hurries along whilst looking for a signal, reasoning that the two of you should head to the bridge or somewhere equally important to look for answers. Knowing he has way more experience in this than you do, you happily let him take the lead, smiling softly at how your agreement makes him puff up with pride. Being a mini has made him rather unaccustomed to any kind of leadership, so even the simplest praise or deference always means the world to him.

·His ego boost is quite rudely interrupted by a sudden tremor through the ship, though he's hardly knocked off balance for long due to his unique skills. Keeping his footing solid and you secure on his shoulders, he immediately asks if you're okay once the floor steadies beneath him, knowing that it was just a little shake but worried nonetheless. You assure him that you're fine, which convinces him to hold you a little less tightly. Looking up into his visor, you're concerned to see his usual calm replaced with a much more serious expression. It's one you know to only expect when things are about to get bad. As he starts walking again, he explains that, as an expert on seismic things, he knows that the ship has just been snagged. Having an internal sensory system specifically designed to detect these things also makes him certain of the exact size of the enemy and where it hit; and what he detected isn't good.

·Despite being less than half his height, Rumble is your immediate worry as he goes on to explain more of the situation, talking more to cut through the quiet to calm his nerves. You know that you're not built for alien robot battles, but quite frankly, neither is he. Not on his own at least. Though he'll surely deny it now, he's confided in you that without his brother or a bigger bot to sync up with... fighting anything but other minis is a lot harder. Knowing that makes you press him gently on a plan; where should the two of you go to be safe?

·As expected he's immediately adamant that he's fine, but his attitude to you is another story, as is obvious by how he shifts you completely into his arms and holds you tightly. With a promise that he won't let anything touch you, he surprises you with a completely unrestrained sense of protective drive, something quite out of character for a bot that usually struggles with deep feelings. Knowing that ships always have extra guards stationed at key locations, he decides to hurry his way to the medical bay, secretly hoping not to encounter any enemies on the way. Not that he's embarrassed to be a mini or anything, but in moments like these he really wishes he could be big and strong for your sake... Pushing those thoughts deep down, he hurries along and tries to focus on how cool he looks carrying you to safety. Maybe after all this is over he'll be able to tell some awesome stories about rescuing you.

·Seeing you get a little sleepy absolutely baffles him, and he gives you a little tap to wake you up with a tease about taking poorly timed naps. Not having realized you were nodding off, you rub at your eyes in confusion, suddenly aware of sleepiness that certainly wasn't present earlier. At your continued and obvious exhaustion he's quite worried. Had he better practice at driving with an occupant he'd have given you a ride to save time, but even at the best of times previous attempts at that were disasters, so in your current state you'd probably end up getting seriously hurt... It's yet another thing to regret as he holds you closer and hurries along, secretly trying to establish communication so he can hopefully get some answers. The lack of success makes him more worried with every passing minute.

·Though Rumble is no stranger to cuddling behind closed doors and carrying you to show off his strength, this is the first time he's held you like this in public for so long, and it feels very nice. You know he's worried about you, but it's getting harder to focus on staying awake and comforting him with his arms keeping you so secure, and his little spark humming so warm and strong right next to you. Only his gentle pleading for you to keep your eyes open prevents you from nodding off, mostly because his voice is so sad as he does so, and you can't handle seeing that sweet face grow any more worried. Clearly it must be bad if he's openly showing his softer side. You're aided in staying awake by a rather unexpected visitor nearly stepping on the minibot as he enters a hallway, and in the panicked blur that follows your mind is just sharp enough to catch the towering form of a very unfriendly alien before you're laid on the ground and Rumble charges forth in a preemptive strike.

·Though he's every bit as fearless as he usually is in appearance, in his spark he's absolutely terrified as he breaks out his piledrivers, the lack of his brother or Soundwave leaving him with a sense of total helplessness that he has to force down for your sake. The alien is a kind he doesn't recognize, but it's big and clearly hates bots by the way it strikes to kill. Using his tiny size to his advantage, he hammers the legs that are too slow to kick him away in time, striking with a level of force that strains his shock absorbers to a painful limit. The hulking alien collapses as its means of support are demolished in a messy and agonizing attack, but the mini takes no chances, hopping up to the head and delivering a blow capable of creating an earthquake all on its own. He's left panting from the exertion but grateful to have proved himself. Sore from the strain, he hurries back over to you and can't help but ask if you saw what he just did?

·Tiny jubilation is crushed when he hears your weak reply. Even though you're smiling at his victory, you're obviously barely holding on, and that means whatever invisible malady is afflicting you is growing more severe. Scooping you up in bloodied servos, he tries to keep the tears welling in his visor from falling, though admittedly he's not sure why since his image matters very little in the face of losing you. Thinking fast, he breaks open a vent cover and makes use of the claustrophobic shortcut to hurry to the medical bay, ignoring his own overworked body's protests to save you at any cost. Not knowing what the problem could be, he's still tearing himself apart inside over every tiny delay that could now result in the difference between life and death. If only he hadn't hesitated to stop gaming, or had been paying enough attention to avoid that alien... How like him, to prove unworthy of something by ruining it.

·You'd been physically incapable of staying awake as he'd closed in on the part of the ship where help would hopefully be found. Though you had tried so hard and been so heartbroken by his struggles, exhaustion unlike anything had ultimately forced you to rest, with his protective grip on you making it hard to worry as you slipped under. Tears had started to fall without restraint the moment you went quiet. It had made quite a scene when he'd burst into the medical bay, ploughing through a vent cover and startling multiple bots on guard as he yelled for someone to help you, nearly getting shot until he was recognized with you in his arms. Nearby medics had been quick to explain the breakdown of the atmospheric generators and the loss of oxygen, but he brushes all that aside with a single question; will you be okay?!

·Every bot present is immensely surprised by his demeanor. He's known as a troublemaker and a prankster, so even with your relationship to him being taken into consideration, his agony over your condition is not something they could have ever predicted. The loyalty to you is unshakable and obvious even after you receive the care you need, as he refuses medical attention for himself and doesn't care in the slightest when the alien ambush is declared defeated. Not even the prospect of free drinks at Swerve's to celebrate can make him leave you for a second. All he wants is for you to wake up, and to hopefully not be mad once you wake up and learn what happened, which he believes he made worse by being irresponsible and wasting time... Though it isn't allowed, he crawls into your berth with you to snuggle when no one is present.

·You awaken to a much clearer head and the warmth of a bigger body huddled closely around you, and as soon as you open your eyes a familiar frame welcomes you back to consciousness. Whispering a greeting, you're shocked when the mini suddenly clings to you and begins pleading for your forgiveness while also recounting what happened to make you "sick", confusing you beyond all belief at first. Why would the bot you remembered saving you need to apologize? It's only by listening that you realize his misplaced blame is likely motivated by fear, as his hot tears pattering against the berth suggest a bot recently scared out of his wits. The poor mini is blaming himself for his lack of action, in full belief he could have moved faster and should have the moment something was wrong, and sounding quite convinced of his role in your injurey before you shush him as gently but audibly as you can.

·Wiping away heavy tears on his cheeks, you speak clearly through the oxygen mask still secured to your face, reassuring him that he did nothing wrong and had no reason to believe things would play out as they did. When he tries to miserably reply that he's still should have jumped at the first sign of trouble, you remind him that he jumped into action when it counted, taking down an enemy several times his size without anything but his own fists as weapons. Perking up to hear you remember his burst of bravery, he asks a little more confidently if you recall how he punched the alien so hard the hallway shook from the force, and you smile while you assure him that you saw every heroic moment. Hearing himself be referred to as a hero seems to reassure him in ways he didn't know he needed, and the rush of his own gratitude is enough that he hugs you tight without a hint of bashful hesitation. Just being here and safe with you makes it hard to be worried about anything at all.

[spencersawkward]

switchblade faith // spencer reid - chapter 1

summary: one month after joining the BAU, Clea is still settling in. between solving murders and getting acclimated to DC, the only comfortable thing in her life is her friendship with Dr. Spencer Reid.

relationship: fem!OC/Spencer Reid

word count: 3.4k

hi all! welcome to my new story.

I've never written a baby Spence fic before, but I'm gonna try my best. I just wanted to get something out of the way before the book starts:

aside from the fact that it's young Spencer, this book isn't placed in a specific season. I might pull cases from different episodes, but the characters will remain the same. I've included Emily and Rossi as characters because I couldn't bear to have a story without either of them (wouldn't want to subject any of you to a Prentiss-less world).

that's pretty much it. I'm glad you're here. if you wanna read my other stories, my masterlist is here.

happy reading :)

"HA!" I slap my hand down on the pile of cards and slide it towards me, organizing them in a neat pile with a smug expression.

"this game is a sham." Spencer sighs, reaching for his book.

"you're just mad you lost." I raise an eyebrow and shuffle the cards again. "you don't wanna play another round?"

"why would I? the only skill this game requires is fast reflexes." he runs hazel eyes down the page with an alarming quickness. I scoff at his disinterest.

"maybe if you trained those reflexes as much as you trained that big genius brain of yours, you'd get a leg up." Morgan teases from his spot next to me. Spencer glances at him with a frown, his cheeks turning a light pink, before looking to me. I throw up my hands.

"he said it, not me." secretly, I smile at the fact that Derek is backing me up.

"I could beat any of you in poker." Reid defends.

"easily. it helps that I don't even know how to play." I slide the cards back into the holder and cross my arms over my chest with a sigh.

"you don't know how to play poker?" he's shocked.

"I told you, I hate card games like that!" I emphasize. things like poker, blackjack, anything that involves multiple players, I usually don't enjoy much. Emily glances up from her case file with a tiny smirk.

"why?"

"I'm a sore loser." I admit, averting my eyes. there's also the risk factor involved, which includes giving up coins or pretzels or peanuts if I lose. I tend to cling tightly to all three. Prentiss lets out a laugh and Spencer flips the page of his book.

"and winner, apparently."

"you're sassy today, aren't you?" I grin at him, pleasantly surprised.

in the month I've been working here, I haven't spoken to Spencer very much. he's been polite and I've gotten to know his intellect quite well, but he doesn't spend a lot of time with us outside of work. when we go out to get drinks, he either declines or heads home before we can even ask, a bag full of books pressed to his side.

I think he just takes a while to get comfortable around new people-- that's what JJ said when I asked why he seemed to be avoiding me. the fact that he played cards with me today felt like a victory in itself, so I'll take what I can get.

Spencer doesn't reply to my dig, only crosses his long, narrow legs and settles into his book.

"we should start briefing before we land." Hotch and Rossi walk over from their spots at the front of the plane to sit on the couch by our table. I nod eagerly and watch as Emily flips open her laptop to FaceTime Penelope about the case.

the first couple cases were more difficult than I expected because I had never worked in the field before joining the BAU, but I'm starting to get used to flying around constantly and examining actual dead bodies. working sex crimes meant I spent most of my time in front of a computer screen or just staying in the office. this is incredibly different-- which I'm starting to find might not to be a bad thing.

"--the virus killed her hard drive and left that on the screen." Penelope explains, referring to the picture of Heather Woodland's computer.

"'for heaven's sake, catch me before I kill more. I cannot control myself'." Morgan reads the message aloud from the case file. the words feel familiar in my mind and I try to remember where I've heard them before.

"that's exactly what William Heirens left behind." Spencer sparks the memory. I sit up straighter.

"the Lipstick Killer?" my fingertips trace over the case details. it's a weird aspect of the murder to emulate, especially because he didn't even leave the message in lipstick. I guess he's not really concerned with that; based on the unsub's previous victims, we have just under 36 hours to find her.

"his first victim was Melissa Kirsh, 26," Reid scratches his nose as he reads, frowning so hard that I start to think he'll form permanent wrinkles. he's got such a baby face, it's almost funny. "stab wounds, strangulation."

"so he stabbed her first, and then strangled her to finish the job?" Morgan repeats.

"what's with using a belt for the second murder?" Emily flips through the papers, confused. Spencer stiffens in his spot as he realizes this is the perfect time to share his freakishly expansive forensic knowledge.

"strangulation with your bare hands actually isn't as easy as you would believe. he probably tried it, found that it took too long, then stabbed her. and blood takes a long time to clean, so he decided a belt would be more efficient."

"he's perfecting his method." I can't tear my eyes away from the photos, despite the roiling sensation they put in my stomach. even with the things I've already seen, I don't think I'll ever get over photographs like this.

"we'll be landing soon and then we're meeting up with the Seattle field office. be ready to split up once we hit the ground." Hotch snaps shut his case file and stands up, breaking off to go sit alone. Rossi takes note of the old card deck that sits on the table.

"poker?" he looks between the four of us.

"nope." Emily chuckles.

"this one doesn't know how to play." Morgan gestures to me, causing Rossi to turn to me.

"were you raised in a barn?" he asks in his usual manner of speaking: blunt sarcasm with a hint of mockery. I frown sarcastically.

"something like that."

"at some point this week, we'll sit down and I'll teach you." he gets up, pats my shoulder, and walks over to join Hotch. I lower my voice once he's far enough away.

"is he actually gonna make me do that?"

"you don't know Rossi." Morgan shakes his head slowly, slides his headphones back on, and sinks into his seat.

"I'll join and bring JJ with me." Emily winks at me reassuringly, noting the tapping of my nail against the surface of the table. Rossi is a legend in the field and I've read all of his books, but didn't want to freak him out by telling him so. it was embarrassing enough when I met him and got tongue-tied while shaking his hand. he's got an elusive energy that intimidates me, and I'd prefer not to showcase that by humiliating myself with poker.

instead of dwelling on thoughts of how I'm going to fail in front of my idol, I open up one of my books and try to pass the time.

...

while I'm writing some notes on one of the many white boards scattered throughout the field office, I realize that I'm one of four other women in the room, including Emily. she's talking to Hotch and another agent at the opposite end of the room; Reid is unpacking his signature book bag and seems deep in thought. Rossi is reading a document. everyone around me seems to be in a hurry to do something, and I begin to feel dumb.

"you okay?" Morgan asks me. I realize that I've been standing with my marker hovering over the board. my fingertips press into my temple before I turn to him.

"yeah, definitely. just thinking." my mind travels to the map we've got pasted up and the red marker lines that Spencer has already created with the geographical profile.

"looks like we're getting the classic Seattle treatment." Derek points outside to the rain pelting the windows, streaming down the glass and distorting the glow of the city outside. it's gloomy today, with a slight chill running through the streets. I nod and turn back to my task, suddenly realizing something.

"he's willing to travel with the body." I mutter to myself. Morgan steps up next to me, crosses his arms across his chest.

"he must drive a vehicle that can conceal one, then." he glances over to Hotch to see what the unit chief has to say, but Spencer speaks up first.

"one in seven point four drivers in Seattle owns an SUV." it's like a flip switches at the mention of a statistic, diverting his attention from something nebulous in his mind to the tangible case. he's a little similar to a robot.

"an Explorer with tinted windows?" Morgan speaks again as he looks over the case photos.

"those rate higher among women." Spencer again.

"sure, but how do we know it's his car?" I wonder.

"what about a Jeep Cherokee?" Hotch chimes in, almost startling me with the deep register of his voice. I pull my bottom lip between my teeth as I think on it.

"Jeeps are more masculine." Reid comes close to me in order to examine the picture I'm holding. he smells like clean laundry and some nice soap scent that I can't place. maybe it's the gel he uses to slick back his hair. no cologne or aftershave. I don't think he'd need to shave, what with his smooth baby face.

Spencer has some special quirks that make him a little more interesting. he usually avoids physical contact with other people-- doesn't shake hands-- but at other times, he doesn't seem to have self-awareness. like right now, where the shoulder of his red sweater is just barely touching mine. I hand him the picture and step away.

"unsubs love to assert their masculinity."

Hotch nods along, encouraging me to share more of what I'm thinking. after swallowing down a lingering nervousness, I tap the push pin marking where the last body was dumped. "he dropped her out-of-state, so he probably has a previous knowledge of law enforcement. maybe he's got a criminal record?"

"good, Williams." Hotch praises me. my fist clenches triumphantly at my side as he turns to the agent who has been watching us intently. "when do we meet with your task force?"

"four." the man replies. I balk at this, my posture shifting. the shortest time constraint I've ever had here has been a full day. it's already one in the afternoon.

"you want an accurate profile by four today?" I glance between Morgan and Spencer, but the latter is rocking back and forth on his heels with his eyes glued to the white board. Morgan doesn't seem put off by it.

"we can do that." Hotch scowls, snapping shut the case file with a finality that tells me we're about to split up. "Dave and Morgan, head to the last dump site. Williams, Reid, I want you to talk to Heather's brother and try to find out what you can about her life. Prentiss and I will stay here in case of new developments."

I nod curtly, grab my jacket, and glance over at Spencer. he runs his hand over his hair, although I can't imagine what there is to smooth down, then walks over to me.

"you ready to go?" I ask, brandishing the file. he and I have only done two interviews together; I spent most of my beginning weeks working with Emily to get a feel for the job. both times with the boy genius have been fine, if not a little awkward.

he nods in answer to my question. "would you mind driving?"

"no license?" I tease to lighten the mood, but he doesn't get the joke. instead, he frowns at me with something of a distracted expression, adjusts his bag.

"no, I don't like driving in the rain."

"oh," I recover quickly and put a friendly smile on my face. "no problem."

"thanks." he walks ahead of me and I cringe at my own behavior. he acts so differently from earlier on the jet that I start to wonder if I did something wrong. maybe he's just in his head or something; I know I would be if I had an IQ that enormous.

when we get to the house of Heather Woodland's brother, a gorgeous golden lab greets us in the entryway. she puts her paws up on my legs and I reach down to scratch behind her ears with a smile on my face.

"Sandy, calm down." her owner grabs her collar gently to calm her. "sorry."

"no, it's fine, I love dogs." I wave it off and step inside. Spencer is eyeing Sandy warily, but she seems just as eager to say hi to him as she was to me. when she lets out a singular, enthusiastic bark, he startles.

"Mr. Woodland," I suppress my laugh by changing the subject. "I'm Special Agent Williams and this is Special Agent Dr. Reid."

we shake hands, my colleague giving his usual wave and polite smile. the interviewee takes in Spencer's appearance. I know what's coming.

"you look too young for medical school." Woodland says to Reid. this has happened a couple times since I joined the team, but Spencer never seems to mind. if anything, he lights up at the opportunity to share the reason for his official title.

"they're PhD's. three of them." he gives a little smile as we walk into the house, me shaking a few stray raindrops from my hair.

"so... are you a genius or something?" Heather's brother leads us past the hallway into the living room, which is unkempt and littered with pictures, catalogs, and toys. he must have kids in school right now. that would also explain the breed of dog.

"I don't believe that intelligence can be accurately quantified."

"he's being modest," I glance over at Spencer. "Dr. Reid can read 20,000 words a minute-- he's definitely a genius."

Woodland stares at Spencer for a second as he tries to fathom the speed at which someone's mind would have to turn in order to process all that information. I still can't imagine it. Spencer's eyes avoid Woodland's shyly. instead, he watches me as I pet Sandy.

soon after, we ask him about Heather's personality and tendencies. her brother is more than willing to give us all the information we need. I'm surprised, however, by my partner's ease at wandering around Woodland's house, flipping through the magazines on top of the TV and reading the spines of books on shelves. he's quite conspicuous about it.

about halfway through my mental list of questions, Sandy keeps jumping up and wagging her til.

"I'm gonna take her to the backyard quick," Woodland tells us. "one second."

he ducks out of the room and I wait until I know he's out of earshot before sidling up beside Reid.

"there's an immediate relationship established between a buyer and a seller," he tells me, holding up a Datsun Z catalog. we know that she was in the market for one. "if I want to coax a young woman into my car..."

"offer her a test drive." I finish his sentence. of course, within ten minutes of sifting through this woman's house, Spencer has figured out the ruse used to lure her. Woodland returns a moment later with a smile, but we tell him that we've gotten the information we need before leaving.

in the car, Spencer theorizes about the unsub's mental condition as I try to navigate traffic in the storm. thunder rumbles overhead, occasionally sending a vibration through the car. my knuckles tighten around the wheel a bit. I also hate driving in the rain. his rambles fills the silence, however, and somewhat soothe my nerves.

"he doesn't have the MO of a paranoid psychotic. dumping the bodies out in the open, with a weapon nearby... that doesn't align."

"he covers their eyes with duct tape multiple times over, though. he knows he's going to kill them, but he doesn't want them to see his face?" my fingertips drum over the wheel nervously.

"what's wrong?" Spencer asks suddenly, glancing at my hands and then at my face. I still my movements at the change in subject.

"huh? nothing. I just don't like driving in the rain, either."

"oh. I'm sorry." he straightens a bit in his seat. the apology surprises me a little, but he seems genuinely sympathetic. I guess I really don't know him that well.

"it's cool."

we fall into an awkward silence and I bite my lip. we should get back to talking about the case. heaven knows Spencer has more facts to spew, more theories to share about this unsub. anything is better than the gap in conversation. I open my mouth to say more about what we learned at the house, except Spencer speaks first.

"so... how are you liking working here?" he asks awkwardly. it takes a second for the question to register with me. he sounds uncomfortable whenever we're alone and that makes me uncomfortable in turn. where everyone else was quick to include me in their jokes and discussions, Reid always sounds like talking to me exhausts him. it's obvious that he's socially awkward. there's no judgement from me; I'm just surprised that he's pushing to talk about non work-related subjects.

"I like it," not really an accurate summation. I don't think a heart-to-heart is exactly the right move when talking to him. "a little stressful, though."

"you worked in sex crimes before, right?" he looks out the window. there isn't much to see except for the rain-blurred skyline. I nod.

"yep."

"that sounds... hard." he shifts in his seat as he tries to come up with more points of conversation. it's kind of endearing, honestly. I throw him a bone.

"so is profiling."

"why'd you switch?" his eyes flit over to mine as he quickly adds, "if you don't mind me asking."

I take a second to come up with an answer. of course, there's the classic response: I've always wanted to help people— which isn't wrong— it's also not the whole answer. all through college and the Academy, I had my head focused on one thing. I could interview killers and get inside their heads, but there's something entirely different that you don't get from pure research. and one person inspired that in me before I had finished high school.

"don't tell him I said this, but I really wanted to work with Rossi." I say in a hushed tone. there's a slight smile on my lips because I haven't told anyone on the team in fear of being teased. I don't think Spencer is likely to gossip with Rossi about me, though.

"really?" now he sounds surprised.

"I've read all his books and I've been to a couple lectures. he doesn't remember me, evidently." the thought is more funny than embarrassing. he spoke at my college a few years back and I recall being on the edge of my seat, trying to come up with the courage to ask the questions that filled my head. I was too shy.

"does he know you're a fan?" Spencer loosens up a bit.

"nope," we pull off the freeway as we near the field office. I stop at a red light and look over. "I didn't want to embarrass myself with the whole 'your work changed my life' spiel."

at this, Spencer lets out a short, nervous giggle. it's a nice sound, that laugh. it makes me smile when he seems to relax in his seat.

"that's exactly what I did." he says. I frown.

"you told him his books changed your life?" I blush as I realize I just inadvertently made fun of him.

"I, um... well, I got excited to talk about his research." he averts his gaze again and his cheeks turn a slight pink. there's a dimple in his cheek, I notice, that keeps tugging upward. this is my first time having a non-forced moment with Spencer alone; a wave of satisfaction washes over me as I realize the potential for another friend here.

"trust me, I get it." I laugh. we pull into the parking ramp for the field office and I find a spot by the door. Spencer hoists that bag into his lap and runs his hand through his hair. when I pull the key out of the ignition, he waits for me to get out of the car before we start walking toward the door.

it's small, but I appreciate that he doesn't run off without me. we don't talk as we walk, our footsteps echoing along the cement walls.

oh my god first chapter holy fuck! it's short, but I don't wanna overwhelm. I'm so excited for this book!

[obeymebabes]

So my phone glitched out hardcore and deleted the ask so I do apologize, but here you go @spiritchan! This idea is so cute. 😁

Broke this into two so it wasn't super long.

> The Undataebles (Part 2) <

Lucifer

He wouldn't pay much attention to your missing limb.

He knows what its like to have a piece of your body missing/taken away from you.

Lucifer isn't particular in appearance.

He would ask you about how you lost your limb, and wouldn't press you about it if you didn't want to answer.

Respectful boy just wants to know more about you.

If you had a robotic arm he would almost envy you.

He wishes he could have a robotic limb so when he hit/kicked his brothers it would hurt more.

Also enjoys seeing your face smile as you can do all of the things you couldn't previously do without the added help.

Mammon

Insert all of the confusion.

"How the hell did ya lose your arm/leg?"

"Not that I care..."

When you whipped out your robotic prosthetic though, his face lit up in joy.

"Woahhhh you're half robot, MC?"

He definitely has tried to steal it to sell it.

"What? I wasn't doing anything with it! I swear!"

Lucifer was not impressed.

Levi

"Woah you look like *insert anime character name here*!"

If you were missing an arm he would probably forget and ask if you wanted to play a game with him.

He would instantly regret it, poor boy was terrified that he offended you.

If you were missing a leg, he would ask about swimming, definitely regretting that too.

First time he saw the robotic prosthetic? Instant admiration.

"YOU'RE LIKE THE TERMINATOR!?"

He also was concerned that you were actually a proper robot for a while but he wouldn't ever admit it.

Satan

Didn't seem to bother him.

He acted like he was so unaffected by it.

Secretly so unbelievably curious about why you were unlike most humans.

This boy read book after book to see how he could help you with this given situation.

He really enjoyed doing little things for you to make your life easier.

That was until he realized you were half robot.

"I see you won't be needing my help so much anymore, MC."

He was a bit hurt when he realized you wouldn't need him as much given you had a device that fitted your needs.

Asmo

Would have literally 0 shame in asking you every detail about what happened.

He literally loves listening to stories.

Asks every question about how you function in life.

"How do you have sex? Is it the same? Better? So can we try?"

"Oh come on Lucifer, you know you were questioning it too!"

Upon the moment of seeing you had a robotic piece his face lit up

Prepare for him to decorate it.

Will decorate your false appendage to match your outfit.

Beel

He honestly didn't notice.

Took him a few weeks to actually notice you were missing a limb.

Beel.exe has stopped working, he hadn't ever seen a human like you.

Did everything he could to help you work out your other limbs.

He just wanted to make sure you were strong enough to take care of yourself while he wasn't around. (Which wasn't often because he cares so much.)

With your robotic limb he sometimes tested your strength which to his surprise was always more than he expected.

Even when you had your prosthetic in place he would still do just about everything for you.

Belphie

This boy teased you about it.

He never meant any harm however, he was just trying to cope with the idea of someone being so different.

He would usually help you out though, even if you said you didn't need it.

Usually he would go to Satan or Beel when he had questions because he was too shy to ask you.

He enjoyed cuddles without your robotic piece but he LOVED that you could tangle your "whole" body with his.

He would also love drawing all over it. (BECAUSE HE'S AN ARTIST APPARENTLY)

[innuendostudios]

Thoughts on Even More Games

[vague, unspecific spoilers for Heaven’s Vault, Later Alligator, and Life is Strange 2]

Thoughts on Heaven’s Vault

Heaven’s Vault is a game about archeology, which means it’s also a game about incompleteness. This is very clever. Inkle - also the developers of 80 Days, which I will play someday! - specialize in deep narratives that can be explored many, many ways, allowing for a lot of player choice. You make a lot of small decisions - do you share a discovery with the trader in exchange for a valuable item, or hide it so he doesn’t plunder it? do you go looking for your missing friend, or let her stay missing in case there are people trying to follow you to her? These all have their own little arcs and resolutions, and there are so many of them, and so many ways they can play out, that the game can never be played the same way twice. The overall story begins and ends in the same place and theoretically hits the same major beats, but the journey is tailored broadly and finely to each player; it’s a style of design Aaron A. Reed refers to as “not... a branching tree but a braided rope.”

Making a narrative about archeology is how you dodge the exponentially complicated nature of that design: if there are dozens of locations, characters, plot threads, bits of color, which can be engaged with at many points in time, or ignored, or dropped by the player halfway through, how do you avoid telling a story full of gaps and dead ends? Well... you don’t. Having only partial information and having to infer the rest is what archeology is.

The protagonist of Heaven’s Vault, Aliya, is digging up the secrets of an ancient civilization, having been sent by her academy to find a researcher who’s gone missing, and stumbling into his incredible discovery. Everywhere she goes, there are holes: she has partial understanding of the researcher’s journey and motives; he, in turn, had partial understanding of the mystery he was uncovering, and Aliya has only fragments of his knowledge; the ancient texts she translates are usually fragments of larger works, and she is guessing at the meanings of many of the words; the game’s constantly updating historical timeline has entire centuries with nothing but question marks. Aliya arrives in a new location and wonders aloud to her robot companion about what this place was, when it was founded, when it was abandoned, how her predecessor found his way her and where he went next and what he took with him.

The constant feeling of discovery - of unearthing - is magnificent. Site after site, I asked, “What is this place?” Always thinking, if the eventual answer is any good, this is going to be one of the best games I’ve ever played. And, in the end, it doesn’t give you an answer, it just give you enough to make the story feel complete. It answers by not answering.

Also, translating alien texts is just extremely my jam. I’m the weirdo who enjoyed the ending of Arrival but secretly wished the whole movie had been about xenolinguistics like the first half. I guess Inkle felt similar.

The game’s by no means perfect. I think I enjoyed the sailing between worlds more than most - it’s slow, but very pretty - but it’s going to discourage a replay. I don’t think the relationship between Aliya and her robot, Six, ever gets terribly interesting. Some of the archeology is a little too obviously game-y - sail around, wait to find a random ruin, beam Six down to grab an ancient doodad, translate a bit of text, lo and behold it’s from one of the sites you’re looking for and it’s narrowed your search radius somehow. (It gives Star Trek explanations the first few times - e.g. “it has radiation that only exists in one part of the nebula” - and then stops bothering.) And the game sags a little in the middle; it could’ve hacked out 3 or 4 dig sites and still given me the same experience.

But, all told, there’s magic in it, and it just feels good to be there. Do not sleep on this one.

Thoughts on Later Alligator

There’s not a ton to say about this game except that is charming as hell. Lindsay and Alex Small-Butera have build a beautifully animated world of cute alligators, one of whom is having a birthday party where he’s convinced he’s going to be murdered. He wants you to run around getting information out of everyone who’s going to be there, which you get by completing minigames. It’s a cast of weird and funny characters with weird and funny dialogue and there’s not much more to it than that.

The design can be a little frustrating. Some minigames, if you lose, you don’t get to try again. Some are annoyingly finicky. You need to complete them all to get the true ending, which means, in my case, playing the game three times to complete all the bits you missed or got locked out of. The ending was a little different each time, so it wasn’t a total wash, but the game’s on a timer that only advances when you play a game or take the bus, and once you’ve completed most of the games there’s a lot of traveling back and forth from one nowhere to another just to advance time to the next unskippable plot beat.

(It’s also a little unclear what you’re missing as you try to get the final ending, as some of the ongoing puzzle are optional.)

But I can’t get mad. The game is too damn cute! Each character is lively and unique, with tons of personality, and the dialogue is just clever enough not to fall into empty adorkability.

It good.

Thoughts on Life is Strange 2

Somewhere, early in the development of Life is Strange 2, some Dontnod employee wrote in a design document “Episode 4 - cult?” (but in French) and nobody told them “no.”

I will not forgive them for this,

After twenty minutes of LiS2, I was ready to yell at everyone who had reported it was boring. It has one of the most powerful, gut-punching openings of any game I’ve played in recent memory. And all through the first, second, and third episodes, I was in love. Unlike Before the Storm, this was its own creature, willing to make dramatic departures from the original game’s template. Instead of controlling a character with supernatural powers, you play as the superpowered character’s older brother. The one with the magic is a 9-year-old, unable to fully understand or control his abilities, suffering a recent trauma, and needing to be guided through a dangerous and racist world. All the ambition missing from Before the Storm is back, and this time the animation isn’t creepy and the writing is wildly improved (thanks to some journeyman script work from Fullbright’s Steve Gaynor) and I even have a computer able to play it on higher graphical settings.

But nothing good lasts.

Everything good about the series screeches to a halt in Episode 4, the one where some asshole said “cult?” and didn’t get a Nerf football thrown at their head. And it’s not just that it’s a terrible idea; it’s actually sort of amazing how much the game relies on an alchemy of plot, tone, theme, and writing, and how a slight imbalance can throw the whole thing off. Episode 4 has scene after scene that are powerful in their conception - brothers reunited after a violent rift; a boy having his first conversation with his estranged mother in nearly a decade; getting interrogated by the feds for a crime that can’t even be explained by physics - fall flat because the writers can’t think of anything interesting for the characters to say. (Steve Gaynor’s name stops appearing in the credits as of this episode.)

And here the game’s rickety bits, kept delicately together for three episodes, start to shake apart. Dontnod’s overly-earnest voice direction, which I didn’t notice in the early episodes, started to wear me down. (”Could you sigh mid-syllable, like you’re slightly overwhelmed with emotion?” “Sure, on which line?” “All of them.”) The thinness of the secondary characters, most of whom pop up for one episode and disappear, became more noticeable. The lack of a mechanical hook like the time rewinding of the original game, and the attendant commentary on choice-based games and power fantasies, made the game feel less substantial. The surreal imagery of the original, obligatorily evoked in the prequel, is sensibly absent, but there’s nothing equally striking that replaces it. Even the branching path decisions become less clear: the end-of-episode stat screens for the final episodes mentioned at least a dozen choices I didn’t even know I’d made, some of which were critical in shaping my younger brother’s morality and were not necessarily the choices I’d have made if I’d known I was making a choice at all.

Come the final episode, I got An Ending that seemed right for the way I’d played, but much of the way I’d played felt accidental.

So what are we to make of this? Life is Strange is a beautiful disaster, an ambitious disaster, where Life is Strange 2 is almost less interesting for being  more competent. It has a huge mess of charged topics - American racism, teens losing their virginity, raising a child outside the nuclear family, grief and trauma - and, while it handles them without the gracelessness and sledgehammer subtlety of the original, it doesn’t come to any conclusions about any of them. LiS1, for all its jank, had some opinions, where LiS2 falls into the category of “this sure is some shit, innit?” games.

It starts with a powerful premise, deeply relatable characters, fine writing, beautiful art, but can’t even manage, in the end, to be a disaster. It is the only game in the series so far to be forgettable.

[spaceskam]

writing prompts except they’re episode plots from my favorite childhood shows

IF YOU GUYS USE ANY OF THESE, NO MATTER THE FANDOM, TAG ME! LET ME KNOW! I WILL READ AND GIVE LOVE!

Drake and Josh

Character A believes Character B’s significant other is hitting on them. Chaos ensues.

Character A and Character B make a bet to see who can live without their bad habits (eating too much junk food, biting their nails, etc) and whoever loses has to do something rash.

Character A blows all their money and decided to make it up by turning their house into a bed and breakfast. Character B is not a fan.

Character A’s pen pal (Character B) comes to visit and, due to a language misunderstanding, Character B and C end up married. It’s up to Character A to fix it.

Character A grows a mustache. Character B hates it.

Character A finds out their significant other, Character B, might be stronger than them and challenges them to a fight.

Character A plays the role of criminal on TV, but ends up being mistaken for the actual criminal. 

Character A runs over their favorite celebrity.

 Character A and Character B make a bet to see who can get more dates‒but Character A immediately falls in love.

 Character A buys a monkey without Character B’s permissions. When they sell it, they have to steal him back after finding out the seller eats monkies.

Victorious

Everyone packs up in an RV to head to the beach and proceed to get trapped inside.

Character A gets their wisdom teeth removed and is a handful to deal with. Everyone has to help.

Everyone goes to a party where they have to method act; whoever breaks character is banished.

Everyone goes to a foreign country and accidentally get arrested. They have to break out.

Character A develops a crush on someone that scares them and needs Character B to talk them out of it.

Everyone plays a dating game only to find out that the only actual couple of the group is failing it.

Character A and Character B are cast in a play as a married couple, forcing them to work together rather than hate each other.

Character A’s car breaks down and now needs a ride to work/school. Each friend that takes them causes a new problem.

Character A and Character B used to be a couple. Character A has a date and their friends don’t want Character B to be jealous, so they pay someone to ask them out. It goes horribly wrong.

Everyone has to say yes to everything all day as long as it doesn’t involve people getting hurt.

The Suite Life of Zack and Cody

Character A falls for a girl in a beauty pageant and joins it to get closer to her.

Everyone goes to a haunted hotel room to see if it’s actually haunted.

Character A dislikes life and accidentally enters a world where everyone is the exact opposite which is fun until it isn’t.

Character A and Character B agree to help with their friend’s daycare. They are very bad at children.

Character A pretends to be rich to impress their love interest.

Character A and Character B have to do a parenting project for school as partners.

Character A accidentally creates a Frankenstein’s Monster-esque robot.

Character A finds the cell phone of somebody who could be the love of their life‒that they have never met.

Wizards of Waverly Place

Everyone goes back in time to stop them from losing something important.

Everyone finds out their adventures are being exposed via famous books and they have to figure out how this person knows what they are going to do before they do it.

Character A steals Character B’s diary and finds themself literally inside the story.

Character A moves away, so Character B uses magic to enter their dreams to be with them.

Character A is a werewolf and Character B is a human who wants to meet their family. Chaos ensues.

Character A has had their memories blocked and Character B uses magic to unlock them. What were they forced to forget?

Character A accidentally falls for a fallen angel.

Character A needs a date so they bring a mannequin to life.

Character A decides to become a monster hunter.

Character A gets a dog that turns out to be a literal dragon in disguise.

Zoey 101

Character A accidentally creates a bacteria, causes everyone to be quarantined until it’s decided it’s safe.

Character A gets their entire arm stuck in a vending machine.

Character A needs a tutor and gets assigned Character B who was previously thought to be a moron.

Character A and Character B are invited into a secret society.

Character A and Character B share a room/house in which their fire alarm goes off every night.

Character A and Character B are secretly dating and, in order to continue to keep it a secret, they choose each other’s prom dates.

When Character C develops a crush on Character A, Character A and Character B are forced to address their relationship.

Everyone decides to put things in a time capsule.

There’s a contest to see who can keep their hand on a van the longest.

Everyone must write a secret and tie it to a balloon for a psychology class. 

Boy Meets World

Character A and Character B fall asleep together and everyone thinks they slept together.

Character A gets increasingly worried as they have multiple dreams involving the death of Character B.

Character A, in a statement against beauty standards, cuts all their hair off and has an immediate breakdown.

Character A has a rule of only dating people for two weeks before breaking up with them until they find a bag and decide they are in love with the owner.

Character A tells Character B that they love them, which causes Character B to break up with them.

Character A’s significant other dumps them and only agrees to get back together if they stop talking to their best friend.

Character A and Character B throw a party to prove that they aren’t boring.

Character A gets rejected from every college they applied to.

[ckret2]

Okay so I got an ask like,

anonymous asked: whose ur favorite Hazbin character? Like your absolute #1 and why?

and technically my answer is Alastor, but Sir Pent is such a close second that I gave my reasons for him too in that ask, and now I’m making a second post about Alastor.

Reasons I really like Alastor but like, only slightly more than Sir Pent:

- Honestly “I can suck ya dick” *IMMEDIATE BRAIN BREAK FACE* is probably the moment I, like, mentally latched on to Alastor’s character, and at that point I don’t think I even knew yet that the creator had said he was ace. It just... I could feel the aceness in my soul. Like that thing where Jedi run into somebody and go “oh you’re strong in the Force, I can tell.” That was just such a perfect and succinct ace joke, and by that I mean like it feels like a joke from an ace perspective. Like it was so relatable.

- tbh half my reasons for liking Alastor are “oh that’s relatable,” which is hilarious, because like... I don’t like characters because I relate to them, ever, but because I think they’re interesting in their strange/different ways. Alastor is the sole exception I can think of where half the reasons I like him is because I look at him and go “oh big mood.” Other ace or aro characters I’ve seen in the past just make me go “oh... okay. cool. nice, representation for me” and then I don’t really care about them. Alastor, though, the SECOND I learned he was ace, something in my brain went “FUCK YES. ONE OF OURS.” I immediately sat down and started writing a character study fic about Alastor being ace/aro in the exact same precise way that I’m ace/aro, and that was even before we got confirmation that he was aro. I was ready to go all in on him anyway.

- Half the reason I like his ace/aro-ness when I don’t care about it as much on other characters is because like... usually, when you get an ace/aro character, it goes one of two ways:

1) their entire character is built around/“in tune with” their ace/aro-ness, in a way. Most obvious when you have the stereotypical “robot/alien that cannot love,” but also seen in “character that is naive and pure and innocent and lustless,” “character that acts like an actual literal child,” “character that acts like a bad autism cliche,” “character that’s too cold or cruel or emotionless to feel love,” etc. And that’s boring, when they’re only ace/aro because the writer cannot imagine a character Like That being any other way, or because the writer cannot imagine an ace/aro being Any Other Way. 

Or, 2) they’re written as “too normal,” as in, like, NOTHING ABOUT THEIR PERSONALITY or life experiences or anything seems shaped AT ALL by the fact that they do not share an internal sense of lust and/or romance that most of the rest of the human species not only has, but also is obsessed with.

And Alastor falls in neither camp. He’s gregarious and talkative and puts on little performances wherever he goes, and he obnoxiously butts in on somebody else’s group project by begging for an opportunity to help out and then obnoxiously volunteers his friends who hate him to help with the group project, and he’s manipulative and dangerous and secretive and violent, and he hides his emotions and he disguises when he’s feeling weak... and also the quickest way to throw him off his game is to make a sexual pass at him because he’s blindsided so hard by it that it’s like for a moment there he forgot that sex exists.

And that’s what I want to see. A character whose personality isn’t based on/tied into his ace/aro-ness, BUT we can clearly see his character IS INFLUENCED by the fact that he views the world through a completely different lens from everyone else.

I can imagine that Alastor had to puzzle through What Is Love/What Is Desire, purely on a psychological “what’s going on inside other people’s heads?” level, as an outside observer incapable of participating it and trying to understand it based on anecdotes and fictionalized accounts and descriptions and conversations, comparing it to the emotions inside his own head and trying to go “so it’s kind of like this feeling plus that one and those, but More, and Different, and in that Other Direction.” I can imagine that as a kid Alastor “decided” to have crushes because he knew it was about that time it should be starting, and it hadn’t happened by then, so maybe what he needs to do is pick whoever he thinks is best-looking and get going with the crushing on them, right? I can imagine that Alastor spent his teen years waiting for his desires to “turn on” the way they did for everyone else, and being slightly puzzled when they took so long, but also okay with it because the more he thought about it the more it seemed like it was probably a nuisance—no one around him was someone he’d like to be attracted to—so he was fine with the fact it was taking so long, and he sort of assumed that it wasn’t because he didn’t have the capacity for desire but because none of his peers were desirable to him. I can imagine that he had his first kiss at like fifteen and thought it was horrible and gagged on it, and within an hour decided this was absolutely hilarious.

I can imagine Alastor having all these experiences—which are experiences I had. I’ve never seen another ace/aro character I can easily and naturally imagine having a single experience in common with me. Because no other ace/aro characters feel to me like ace/aro characters. They’re either characters with an ace/aro sticker arbitrarily and meaninglessly slapped on them, or they’re a walking stereotype about lovelessness.

- Besides Alastor’s spectacular Asexuelle Panique™ face, the other single line that made me latch onto him was “Why does anyone do anything? Sheer! Absolute! Boredom!” There are some very specific character types that I’m an absolute sucker for, and one of them is: extremely powerful character, at the top of their game, unstoppable and uncontrollable and unmatched, a loner who likes it that way, BUT they’re bored as hell, either because they’ve met all their goals or because they don’t know how to set any—and the boredom is eating them up inside, it’s driving them slowly mad, the sheer tedium of trying to fill one day after another with nothing to do is weighing down on them, if depression is usually compared to a heavy rain then this depression is like an endless empty waiting room, or depression like solitary confinement, or depression like an unmoving sun shining on an infinite flat desert, the depression of a completely empty hollow life leveled flat by infinite interminable boredom, a boredom they would do ANYTHING to get rid of, a boredom that’s like a withdrawal, a boredom that makes your hands shake and your pulse quicken with desperate need for the drug to stave off the withdrawal symptoms, but god, you don’t even know what the drug IS, you just know you NEED it, some form of stimulation, ANY stimulation, you’re going mad in this empty desert with your hands trembling and the withdrawal clouding your mind—

Have I mentioned that I have ADHD? Did you know that untreated ADHD can result in depression specifically due to chronic mental understimulation? I keep telling myself “bruh, don’t headcanon Alastor as having ADHD, you don’t even headcanon that he has any other traits that line up with ADHD symptoms,” but like. That one line. “Sheer! Absolute! Boredom!” I felt that in my very bones. There is desperation in that man. There is desperation in him that speaks to me like nothing else does. Like to the point that if it turns out that Alastor secretly DOES have a secret evil manipulative scheme going on I’m going to be annoyed/disappointed specifically because his driving motive isn’t boredom, lmao.

Anyway I feel for characters like that. I like to explore that desperate despairing boredom. I like to force them through that understimulation withdrawal, drive them to do stupid wild desperate things to try to get the stimulation they need. And then, when I’m feeling nice, I like to help them find a cure. Usually I imagine the cure is “dude, you’re such a loner that you’ve cut yourself off from the rest of the human race, you have NO human connections, even when you’re technically interacting with other people you’re still completely emotionally isolated inside your own shell. Make some goddamn friends and start to care about other people and their lives and you’ll find that the act of having other people exist in your world who matter to you will give you that stimulation you’re desperately missing.” Because these desperately bored characters are also desperately emotionally isolated. And they might be happy/content in their isolation—but they’re not doing anything to cure their own understimulation like that.

(“Hey OP is that how you cured your understimulation?” nah I got ADHD meds.)

- Remember everything that I just said about how much I love that Alastor is aro? Well forget everything I just said. Chuck it out the window. Bye.

So every once in a while I find a character that, for whatever reason, I really, really, really want to see pining. I want them to be in love, and I want it to be unrequited, and I want it to go on for years. I want them sobbing in private and then hiding it completely when they face anyone else. I want them to hurt so bad they feel like they can’t breathe. I want them unable to think about anything but their beloved. I want it festering inside them like an infected wound. I want it to hurt. Forever.

(“Hey OP do you uh, do you ever, yknow, want them to get their loved one?” yeah sure whatever)

For some reason, Alastor is one of those characters. Why? I dunno. I haven’t figured out my mental pattern on these ones yet. Maybe it’s specifically because it’s so incongruous with his outward appearance/and attitude. Maybe it’s because he’d do a really really good job at hiding it, but also I think he’s probably kind of a mess inside under his mask, and I think adding unrequited desire under that mask would mess him up anymore in really spectacular ways. Like a china cabinet that shifted in an earthquake so that if you open all the doors all the plates will fall out and break, except they’re already all broken inside of the china cabinet, but he’s in denial about that as long as he doesn’t open the door. I dunno, I’m speculating.

- On that note: I feel like he’s probably, like, hypercompetent and super powerful and super successful on the outside, but actually he’s a sort of screwed up dork who’s got no idea what he’s doing. (I present the furby organ as supporting evidence.) I like extremely powerful deeply feared dorks, ESPECIALLY when they have no idea what they’re doing.

- Also, affable villains. Totally friendly/sociable and totally evil.

- I dig his weird radio schtick. Like, Radio Stuff isn’t a thing I specifically like about characters, but on him I think it’s cool. Character gimmicks that can go a lot of ways and that you can do a lot of stuff with in character development are fun.

I think that covers all the important bases.

[julia-highstorms]

I can't hide my feelings from you now (Tom x F!MC (Julia Vance-Chu))

Author’s note: Tom Sato is having his first serious crush. It’s Valentine’s Day and here’s something I wrote a time ago. It takes place in ILB Chapter 11 and I wanted to get inside Tom’s head. My masterlist

Disclaimer: Characters and some dialogues belong to Pixelberry Studios.

Song: There's Too Much Love - Belle & Sebastian

Rating: PG-13

Pairing: Tom x F!MC (Julia Vance-Chu)

Word count: +1.7k

It's safer not to look around

I can't hide my feelings from you now

There's too much love to go around these days

Tom stopped short right in front of the wooden door, the first aid kit in his hands, pondering if he really should get in or not.

As soon as they all got inside of Wescott’s fancy yacht, they all were headed to a different room to get dressed up. Tom thought about the insane night they were having and it might would be helpful if he helped Julia with her wounds...

...But she might wanted to be alone for a while, not seeing anyone. They had just fought a horde of animal zombies and her little brother had been kidnapped by a psycho lake ghost… Alright, Julia most certainly wanted to be alone.

But… he wanted to see her. Talk to her. Listen to her. Check out if she was doing okay, as she could ever be.

…He just wanted to be near her. Was that too weird? Was he a creep?

It was crazy. Tom felt like he had never connected to anyone before the way he connected with her. And he had known Julia for just a few days, but he was… so charmed by her. Since he had seen her for the first time at Arthur’s cabin, actually.

The truth was that Julia Vance wouldn’t leave his mind for the past days, as much as he forced himself to not think about her.

Whenever he went to work, he secretly wished she would drop by at the shop, just to say hi. And she did. Every single morning.

Even in the middle of his investigation on finding out what the hell was happening at Pine Springs, his mind would always drift back and forth to her pretty face, and that mysterious side grin of hers. His eyes were always searching for her. He was even listening to songs that reminded him of her.

He’d always get anxious by the thought of just seeing her. But whenever she was around, he felt the most comfortable ever. In his element. As if they’ve known each other for years. He could be himself around her.

Was he going crazy? Was he sick?

But, before he could change his mind and turn away, he hesitantly knocked the door. He had all the trouble to find a first aid kit and go there. He wouldn’t leave now like a coward.

“One second!” - he heard her voice from the other side and Julia opened the door a few seconds later, her dark surprised eyes finding his.

“Uh, hey, Julia, I’m not bothering you, right?” - the words spilled out of his mouth before he could hold his tongue. Tom Sato was feeling nervous.

“No, of course not. What’s up?” - she said softly, looking curiously at him.

He felt that tingling sensation going up to his cheeks as he lifted the white box with an emblazoned red cross on it in his hands.

“I, uh, I thought maybe you could use some help patching yourself up. And, um, maybe talk a little…?” - the words kept leaving his mouth in a rush. - “I mean, we almost died back there, and now we’re speeding toward evil magic ground zero to do some kind of mysterious ritual and it’s all just—” - he stopped himself, looking down at his feet, trying to contain his anxiousness. - “Or... maybe this was a bad idea. If you just wanna be alone, that’s cool too, I can just leave this and go. Yeah, I’ll go.”

But before he could turn and leave, he felt her soft and small hand on his, stopping him. He looked up to her face and watched the corners of her mouth turning upright.

“Some help patching up would be amazing. And I always will have time to talk to you, Tom.”

He smiled, feeling so suddenly relieved. She had this funny effect over him. Julia could make him the most nervous mess but also put him at ease at the same time. Just crazy.

“Okay, great! Where should we start?”

“You can start by coming inside.” - she giggled, stepping to the side and letting him in.

After closing the door behind them, Tom and Julia settled next to each other on the narrow bed. He cracked open the first aid kit and began to remove rolls of bandages and cans of antiseptic spray.

“So… have you done this before?”

“Some. There’s a lot of injuries in basketball.” - he remembered all those times he had to patch himself and Andy up after a game. Good thing his cousin, Rei, taught him the basics of first aid. - “And robotics. And boat repair.”

“So I’m in good hands then?”

“Definitely the best hands on this boat.” - she grinned.

“...And should I take off my shirt? You know, so you have better access.”

That question caught him off guard and Tom fumbled the roll of bandages in his hand as he felt his cheeks burning.

“Uh, yeah, that’s— that would help. I mean, if you’re okay with that.”

“‘Course.”

Tom watched in awe as Julia turned around and pulled off her top, casting it aside, exposing her bare back to him. She heard him whistling low behind her.

“Damn, you really did get banged up.”

She felt his fingers carefully trailing lightly over her back, sending a brief shiver throughout her body.

“Think you can fix me, doc?” - she playfully asked over her shoulder. Tom chuckled, before assuming a ‘respected doctor’ tone:

“Leave it to me, kid. Your life’s in good hands.”

He gently disinfected her wounds with the spray and cotton swabs.

“You know, I wanted to say thank you, again, for saving my life tonight.” - she murmured and Tom ducked his head bashfully.

“I don’t know if I saved your life exactly…”

Julia rolled her eyes, smiling and turned to face him. Tom focused on keeping his eyes on her face. And not on the black bra she was wearing.

“You know you don’t have to be always so humble, right? You’re a badass. It’s okay to own it.”

She watched a shy grin spreading through his face.

“You think I’m a badass?”

“Come on, dude. You’re a one-man monster-death machine. If you haven’t figured out you’re a badass yet, I don’t know what to tell you.”

“Y’know, I spent a lot of time in high school thinking no one would ever see me the way you see me right now.” - Tom shyly tucked a stray strand of hair behind his ear. - “So I guess what I’m saying is…” - his smile widened. - “Thanks.”

“No need to thank me, Tom. You’re a badass.” - Julia smiled back at him.

Setting aside the antiseptic swabs, he picked up the bandages and began wrapping them around her disinfected injuries.

“How’re you doing now? In a lot of pain still?”

Julia smiled mischievously.

“Why don’t you kiss it and make it better?”

She watched with satisfaction his cheeks blushing a furious red as he stammered:

“I— that— wouldn’t that be unsanitary?”

“Not if you do it like this…” - she leaned in, gently cupping his jaw in one hand, and planted a tender kiss to his lips.

Tom kissed her back right away, softly and pliantly, and when Julia pulled back, she saw his glassy eyes.

“Is, uh… do you feel better?”

“Hmm…” - she pretended to be thinking. - “I think I might need a stronger dose.” - she smiled cheekily, leaning back in and Tom welcomed her eagerly, his arms wrapping carefully around her waist, pulling her closer to him.

Julia deepened the kiss, feeling his smooth skin with her fingertips, his taste on her tongue and how she felt so comfortable and safe in his arms. Tom tried to memorize how soft and sweet her lips were, the heat of her body and how small she felt in his arms.

After several moments of trading kisses, they finally pulled apart, breathless and excited.

“I should, um, start pulling all this stuff away, right?” - Tom pointed to the rolls of bandages and antiseptic spray cans.

Julia frowned, clearly disappointed for not having any more time to spend kissing Tom.

“Yeah… I wish we had all the time in the world.”

He flashed her a grin, squeezing her hand gently.

“We will. When this is all over.”

She felt enoughly reassured by that and pulled her shirt back on, while Tom carefully replaced the supplies back in the first aid kit, feeling that it was a good thing that he went there to talk to her, after all.

“You know, I was kind of nervous before coming to see you.”

She looked both surprised and confused at him.

“You were?”

“It’s crazy, but I still get nervous around you sometimes. Or, maybe nervous isn’t the right word. My heart starts to pound and my hands starts to sweat. I don’t know, maybe I’m getting sick or something.”

Julia giggled, and her soft hands cupped his jaw, caressing it lightly.

“You’re not getting sick.”

“I’m not?” - he genuinely looked shocked.

She smiled tenderly at him, admiring that face that’s been stuck on her mind for days.

“Haven’t you ever been in love before?”

Tom suddenly went rigid as the words came down to him.

“I… No. I haven’t.”

She took his chin in hand and tilted his face to her, making him meet her gaze, a genuine gracious smile spreading through her face, lighting it up.

“Tom, I’m falling in love with you too.” - she said in a whisper, feeling her heartbeat speeding up.

“I— you— what…?” - Tom just couldn’t believe in his ears.

Julia ran a thumb tenderly along his jaw. She loved him. She loved him so much.

“You heard me.” - she grinned widely before capturing his lips with her own, kissing him deeply and passionately, until he realized that she did love him. When they pulled back, she found Tom grinning radiantly.

“Whoa. Does kissing actually get way better when you’re in love or it that just me?”

Julia giggled, staring deeply into his eyes. Those eyes that she’s been dreaming about.

“Oh it’s definitely not just you,”

And they both leaned in again, eager to continue…

It's safer not to look around

There’s no hidin’ my feelings from you now

There's too much love to go around these days

Tagging: @littlecrookedheart @pixelburied @mysticgayralsei @breaumonts @abbiebishops @madhattterusagi @noahpologiste @danni-asturias  @mysteli @indiacater @indescribablechoices @emomoustache @choices-fanatic @edgydepressedchoicesthot @violarobics @withoutanyconfidence @tiz-rex @priya-trash @alicegma @thequeenchoices @endlessflame @ludextruction @scrappysheep (if you would like to be tagged - or don't - let me know!)

[princesstadashi]

Big Hero 6/OUAT AU

Okay guys--so I worked this whole big AU up in my head while I was at work today, inspired by @honeyxmonkey ‘s Tangled the series OUAT AU and @greensword101​ ‘s accompanying ask to me about Fred finding Hiro and giving him a hug once the curse was broken! Now, sadly I think I accidentally left my page of notes at work, or else they’re just lost somewhere in my bag, but I’m going to type of everything that I remember and hope for the best--here we go!

Backstory of how everyone got dragged into the curse: So I’m not even going to try to go into weird multi-versey type shit and try to be detailed with this but what you need to know is that Fred/Tadashi and Honey Lemon/Gogo are the main ships here, and Fred’s mom/Gogo’s parents are not happy about this, like at all. I have this headcanon that Gogo’s parents, while not as wealthy as Fred’s parents, are pretty well off (business owners? doctors? I’ll leave it up to your imagination) and are not at all happy with Gogo’s lifestyle choices/were probably emotionally and psychologically if not physically abusive to her, which is why as soon as she could she ran away to live with Honey Lemon’s family, and she and Honey Lemon eventually got together. Definitely not the match her parents wanted for her and they’re still mad that she wasn’t this perfect feminine daughter that they wanted. Fred’s mom is kind of the same way but mostly she’s just homophobic as shit and also wanted to marry Fred off to some rich girl like her and Fred’s dad’s parents did to the two of them. When it came down to choosing, Fred’s dad chose his son over her and divorced her, so she’s pissed because of that. 

Moving forward before this gets too long: Long story short, Gogo’s parents and Fred’s mom kind of knew each other from moving in the same social circles and when they somehow find out about the curse (which wasn’t going to hit most of San Fransokyo, if at all) they either go to Regina or (more likely) Rumpelstiltskin and make a deal so that they can get not only themselves and their families pulled into this other world where they can have the lives that they wanted, but also pull in the friends and other people who encouraged Gogo and Fred to be themselves and “punish” them for what they did. 

Characters Involved and Their Lives After the Curse:

Fred (new name: George): Engaged to Gogo (a match set up by his mom and Gogo’s parents), his dad in the cursed world doesn’t even fight his mom on things so he had no one to teach him to fight for himself and so he’s just sort of letting life get away from him and hiding in his fantasy stories and comics to escape reality.

Gogo (Edith): Engaged to Fred, never actually rebelled and never ran away from home so while she’s still got her fighting spirit on the inside it’s mostly been stamped out and she spends her days going to social events she hates and acting like she’s the perfect daughter she isn’t.

Honey Lemon (Heather): Works in an overly busy dress shop trying to earn money for college but is so underpaid she barely makes rent, let alone being able to save anything. She does all the tailoring on Gogo’s dresses and other clothes, including working on the wedding dress (which Gogo’s mom is never happy with, she’s probably made fifty dresses by now.) She and Gogo are secretly having a bit of a relationship (fitting rooms = closed doors and privacy with limited clothes for at least a short period of time) but no one can know. (More on the relationship below.)

Wasabi (Darnell): Honey Lemon’s roommate. Also trying to earn money for college (also failing at it), he works cleaning Fred’s family’s house--he’s great at the job because he’s so detail and cleanliness oriented, but he hates being around any germs, and the biggest part of the curse for him is having to clean Fred’s room.

Hiro (Nico): Hiro is a foster kid being “raised” by a horrible man named Montel (a.k.a. Yama) who forces Hiro into stealing things for him to “pay his keep” (and Hiro has the scars to show what happens if he disappoints him.)

Aunt Cass (Rachel): Works as the cook of Fred’s family, Fred’s mother delights in ordering her to make ridiculously elaborate and detailed meals, whether they have company or not, and then criticizing every part of them. Rachel would probably leave except she has a young son, Max, to look after and she can’t afford losing a job and having him taken away from her. (Red herring name alert: Max is actually a human version of Mochi, but if I ever turn this into an actual story it will be fun to throw people a bit off the trail! Also the reason Fred’s mom pulled Aunt Cass into this is because she felt Aunt Cass encouraged Tadashi and Fred to get together, being bi herself, and so she has an especial and very misplaced hatred for her.)

Tadashi (Shiro): Tadashi was found on the outskirts of town unconscious and covered in horrific burn scars. No one new his name except a few letters on a very decayed medical alert bracelet that looked a bit like Shiro (Tadashi Hamada--the “H” and “a” were pretty smeared kind of looked like “r” and “o”, the rest were completely illegible, so they guessed a bit on his name.) He was put in the hospital and put into a medically induced coma while he continued healing. When Emma came to town and time started moving again, Tadashi recovered enough for them to wake him up, but he has no memory of who he was or who his family was, and as his burns were still very severe and had gotten infected he’s still in the hospital for a very long time. (Explanation for Tadashi being alive: back in BH 6 world Fred’s dad, being a superhero, rescued Tadashi but since Tadashi was in such bad condition was still trying to get him back to being stable before letting anyone know that he was alive in case he didn’t make it. Fred’s mom did not count on this being a factor when she made the deal!)

Baymax (Mike): Baymax is a nurse in the hospital where Tadashi is being kept--in Once Upon a Time fashion, he did become human once in our world (I imagine his appearance being a lot like Aziraphale’s, only his irises are dark brown/almost black.) Another glitch in the curse (this time a literal one): even though Baymax’s memories were changed/rewritten for the curse, as a robot his system had backup storage for his memories. Robot brain being combined with a human brain was not quite compatible, so Baymax still talks/moves a bit like a robot which means a lot of people make fun of him for that, but more importantly, while he doesn’t remember everything, Baymax does have flashes of memories from the other world, and somewhat remembers being a robot. Of course anyone he tries to explain this to acts like he’s crazy so he’s learned to keep it to himself, but needless to say he feels a very strong connection to his patient, Shiro (who he at least on some level realizes is probably Tadashi), and is very, very protective of him. 

(This started getting long so actual story development below the cut!)

Story Ideas:

-Fred and Gogo, while resigned to their eventual marriage,are still both incredibly gay in spite of being forced into the closet, so their general secret arrangement is that they’ll be married for their parents’ sake but both are free to privately have lovers or partners (as long as their parents don’t find out about it.) Gogo’s first choice, of course, is Honey Lemon. Honey Lemon is totally in love with Gogo, but she’s torn as to whether she’d truly be happy spending her life as someone’s mistress and not truly married to someone she loves.

-Fred and Hiro meet for the first time when Fred catches Hiro breaking into his room, having been sent by Yama to loot the house. Fred almost calls security, but he sees how skinny Hiro is and how beat up he is and takes pity on him. He wants to call CPS but Hiro begs him not to, afraid of being sent to an even worse home (he has curse memories of being in even worse homes to keep him from ever leaving Yama.) Fred would gladly try to take Hiro in himself but he’s too afraid of what his mother would say. So instead he and Hiro make a deal--any time that Hiro wants to, he can come by the house, and Fred will provide him with money or whatever else he needs to take back to Yama to avoid getting in trouble, and then Hiro gets to secretly spend a few hours with Fred, playing video games, reading comics, doing all the fun kid stuff he never gets to do at home--and of course Aunt Cass makes it her mission to make sure that Hiro always gets at least one good meal while he’s there, even though she doesn’t understand why it hurts so much to see this teenager she doesn’t even know leave to go back to his foster home.

-Hiro and Baymax meet when Hiro’s class goes to the hospital to help decorate it for the patients (remember when Henry went and met “John Doe”? Same visit, even though Hiro is of course in a different, older class and also probably in a different wing of the hospital.) Baymax sees Hiro and, with his glitchy memories of the other world, remembers Hiro, but unfortunately Hiro is only freaked out by this stranger calling him Hiro (”My name is Niko!”) and acting like he knows him. Finally Baymax has to give up on that. Still, he “conveniently” sends Hiro to decorate the room of a sleeping patient in the burn unit. Hiro is grumbling about how stupid all of this is, how decorating a room won’t really help anyone, when he hears a voice saying, “No act of kindness, no matter how small, is a waste.” He turns around to realize that the sleeping patient has woken up. 

The patient introduces himself as Shiro, and even though Hiro feels weird talking to this guy who’s mostly covered in bandages, somehow they end up talking all the same, and Hiro finds himself spilling his whole life story to Shiro, who turns out to be a great listener. When Hiro’s teacher tells him it’s time to leave, Hiro finds he actually doesn’t want to go! But Tadashi asks him to wait for a moment, and then pulls a small bag of gummy bears out from a bag by his bed, saying, “Here. My nurse brought these for me and I was saving them for later, but I think you need them more than me.” Which almost makes Hiro cry because he loves gummy bears but he can’t even remember the last time that he had them. (A.K.A. Hasn’t had them since being sent here by the curse.) He promises to come back to visit Tadashi as soon as he can, and he makes good on that promise. He and Tadashi can’t do a lot for each other, but they always find ways to do small things, like how Tadashi will always save the desserts from his meals to share with (or more often give to) Hiro, and Hiro will check out books from the library that he thinks Tadashi would like and reads to him. “No act of kindness, no matter how small, is a waste” becomes their motto. 

-Hiro, spending time with both Fred and Tadashi, and having started seeing both of them as older brother/almost dad figures, plus eventually finding out that they’re both gay, starts dreaming of a life where Tadashi heals enough to leave the hospital, then meets and gets together with Fred, and the two of them adopt Hiro and they all live their happily ever after together. Hiro never manages to get Fred to physically come to the hospital with him, but somehow convinces him to become pen pals with a “lonely guy with no family or loved ones to look after him (he totally pulls out the puppy dog eyes guilt trip) and somehow despite anyone’s best efforts to keep it from happening, Tadashi and Fred start to fall in love all over again :)

The Curse Breaks (a,k.a. the one part of the story I actually wrote):

Hiro races towards the center of town, running as fast as he possibly could. He’d through that Montel was evil--he’d never imagined that things could possibly get worse, but when Yama’s memories had returned Hiro was pretty sure it was only the delayed shock of getting all his memories back at once that had let Hiro get away with little more than a bloody nose (and his life.) Hiro had no idea what the hell was happening--how he was here, in some town called Storybrooke and not in San Fransokyo, and how he had these two completely different lives and memories living in his head and currently at war with each other--but all he really knew is that he needed to get somewhere safe. Somewhere that Yama couldn’t find him and hurt him. 

“Hiro!” Hiro almost kept running when he heard someone shouting his name, too terrified of Yama catching up with him if he stopped, but then he suddenly felt arms wrapping around him and, after a moment of struggling, he realizes that he knew the person holding him.

“F-Fred?” Hiro gasps, looking up at the older man.

“Yeah, Hiro--it’s me,” Fred answers, a look of relief in his eyes as he smiles down at Hiro.

“Y-You remember?” Hiro cries, glad that this was at least some sort of proof that he hadn’t gone completely crazy.

“Of course I do.” Fred hugs him tighter. “I-I’m so glad that you remember too, I was afraid that you might not--”

“No, I remember.” Hiro shakes his head before adding with a shiver, “A-And Yama does too...”

“Yama?” Fred repeats only to gasp after a moment. “Holy shit! I-Is that who you’ve been living with this whole time?” 

“I think the answer is obvious,” Hiro answers, pulling away and gesturing to his bloody nose.

“Oh my God.... Oh my God, Hiro I am so, so sorry,” Fred whispers, his voice full of horror. “I can’t believe-- I-I should have gotten you out of there a long, long time ago, but the curse...”

“Curse?” Hiro repeats in confusion. “What curse?”

“Apparently that’s what’s gotten us all here--a curse that took us from home and put us here, and gave us fake memories and made sure that we’d all be as miserable as possible. And it’s not just people from San Fransokyo, you won’t even believe who some of the people living in this town really are...” Fred answers before adding quickly, “But I can explain more on the way--all of our family and friends are back at my house, apparently my mom and Gogo’s parents have something to do with all of us getting wrapped up in this.”

“So everyone’s there?” Hiro asks hopefully. “Aunt Cass, Wasabi, Honey Lemon?” He’d have asked about Gogo too but Fred had already mentioned her so he could only assume that she was.

“Yes, everyone--even Mochi, can you believe that he’s actually Max?” Fred laughs. 

“Whoa... That is pretty crazy,” Hiro says, shaking his head, trying to wrap his head around the idea that Aunt Cass’ cat had somehow become a human child.

It was as he was thinking this over that another thought occurred to him. 

“Wait, Max...” he says slowly, and then gasps as the realization fully hits him. “Holy fuck, Baymax!”

“Hiro, I-I’m sorry, I don’t know where Baymax is yet, everyone coming out of the curse has everyone pretty scrambled up...” Fred starts to say apologetically, but Hiro cuts him off. 

“No! I mean, I think I know where Baymax is!” Hiro cries, tugging on Fred’s hand. “C’mon, we have to go get him!” 

“...The others can wait,” Fred after agrees after only a moment’s hesitation. “Let’s go get Baymax!”

A few minutes later, both of them rush into the hospital--things were in such a disarray that they didn’t even bother to stop at the nurse’s desk, Hiro leading the way up the stairs to the burn unit where he hoped that he’d find...

“Baymax!” Hiro lets out a huge sigh of relief when he sees the man in his standard white scrubs--it was still incredibly weird to think of the marshmallow-esque robot that Tadashi had made was somehow human, but all that really mattered that he was here and that he was safe. 

“Hiro!” The man turns to Hiro, a bright smile on his face, quickly putting to rest any fears that Hiro might have had that this wasn’t actually Baymax.

“Wait, that’s Baymax?” Fred cries in surprise.

“Fred, hello!” Baymax answers cheerfully, waving to him. 

“I... Uh... Hi?” Fred waves a bit awkwardly.

“I’m so glad that you’re okay,” Hiro says gratefully, hurrying into Baymax’s open arms and giving him a tight hug. 

“I am very well, thank you,” Baymax answers, hugging him back, before letting him go and continuing, “There is someone else here who would like to see you!”

“Someone else?” Hiro repeats in confusion. Who else could be here that he knew?

“Hiro!” 

That’s when Hiro hears a voice--a voice that, even before the curse, he’d given up on ever hearing again. No. No, it couldn’t possibly be--!

That’s when he sees Shiro, sitting in a wheelchair next to his hospital bed--the burn scars had greatly changed his appearance, it was true, and his hair was a bit longer than it had been before. But there was no mistaking those eyes, or that smile. 

“T-Tadashi?” Hiro whispers, tears welling up in his eyes before he could even fully process what was happening. “I-Is it really you?”

“It’s me,” Tadashi answers, looking a bit teary eyed himself, and, without even thinking about the consequences, Hiro launches himself at Tadashi, landing in his lap and wrapping his arms tightly around him, never wanting to let him go, only to find his hands wandering over Tadashi’s features--his arms, his hands, his face--trying to prove to himself that this was real, that Tadashi was really here with him. Tadashi was doing much the same, half laughing, half crying, stroking Hiro’s hair and kissing away the tears as they fell down his cheeks. 

“H-How?” Hiro whispers. “How are you here? “

“I don’t know,” Tadashi admits, shaking his head.”I-I don’t remember anything that happened to me after the fire... But I’m here, and I’m with you, and that’s all that matters.”

Hiro decides that questions can wait for later--all that mattered was that he had Tadashi back. 

“D-Dashi?”

Hiro suddenly remembers that he wasn’t the only one here who had a very good reason to be glad that Tadashi was alive.

“Fred?” Tadashi cries, looking up at Fred with what could only be described as joy in his eyes, and Hiro wisely chooses to move out of the way just in time to avoid being caught in the middle as Fred pulls Tadashi into a deep, passionate kiss. Maybe back in San Fransokyo his old self would have found this gross or made a joke out of it. But not anymore. This was something he’d been trying to get to happen for months, and it felt like his dream was finally coming true. Shiro and George--no, Fred and Tadashi!--were finally a couple, and maybe with this stupid curse gone, they could get married and adopt him so he could finally be away from Yama!

But wait. No, that wasn’t right! Hiro shakes his head. That was Niko’s dream, when he was stuck here, not Hiro’s dream! Hiro never would have dreamed of his older brother and his brother’s best friend getting married and adopting him! ...Would he have? More to the point, though: if a curse had somehow sent them here (and he couldn’t think of a more logical explanation at the moment), and it had indeed been broken--shouldn’t they be back in San Fransokyo? Shouldn’t they have gone back home?

Hiro feels a cold shiver pass through him. What exactly was going on here? And who would have the answers? 

“I have heard that there is a relief center being set up for those who are trying to find loved ones or who have questions about the curse,” Baymax pipes up, in the uncanny way that he had of almost reading Hiro’s thoughts. 

“Well, that sounds exactly like that place we should go,” Tadashi says, turning towards them, with Fred’s hand firmly wrapped around his own. 

“It does--maybe then we can bring some more information back to the others,” Fred agrees.

“Dashi, is it okay for you to leave the hospital, though?” Hiro asks a bit worriedly--he knew that Tadashi had been recovering, but he hadn’t left the hospital since being here!

“I can come with to monitor his condition,” Baymax offers.

“That would be great, thank you, Baymax.” Tadashi grins up at the other man.

“You are welcome!” Baymax replies, looking pleased to be of assistance. 

“Well... If Baymax is coming with us, then I guess it should be okay,” Hiro finally relents. 

“So, are we ready to go?” Tadashi asks, looking first to Fred and then to Hiro.

“Yeah,” Hiro agrees, taking Tadashi’s free hand as Fred continues to hold the other and Baymax begins pushing the chair forward. “I think we are.”

As long as he had his family and friends by his side, he was ready for whatever the future had in store for them.

((Random future story bit: The group running into Yama and Baymax giving him a good punch in the nose since Tadashi can’t stand to do it himself. “I no longer have programming, so I am no longer prevented from injuring a human being :)” (Protective Baymax is SCARY AF and also totally awesome!)))

[glassprism]

Since you're also in other fandoms, are there any ships/pairings you like? Who's your favourite pairing in POTO? Who are your favourite characters (from POTO to all your other fandoms) and why? Ooh, here's a rather unusual one: who's your favourite side character (name one for all your fandoms!) and why?

Yeah, definitely! Though whether some can be counted as actual “ships” is debatable, as you’ll see in a bit.

For Phantom, my favorite “ship” is the love triangle - E/C/R. Not in a polyamorous, threesome way, but one where I love the dynamics of the characters, the way they affect one another, the ways Erik and Raoul are similar and different. So it’s not quite a “ship” in a traditional sense where I want characters to end up with each other, but more in the sense that I like to explore and analyze them.

As for other “ships” or pairings, I’m just going to list, like, every fandom or random-ass thing I’ve ever loved in semi-chronological order (time to go back to my middle school fandoms!). Under the cut for length.

Harry Potter: Sirius Black and Harry Potter. I adored the godfather-godson bond between the two (absolutely no romance; I clicked on an mpreg fic of the two when I was but a wee lass of twelve and it scarred me): how Harry was the last living reminder of Sirius’s best friend, whose death he still feels responsible for; how Sirius is the parental figure Harry wanted, how they were never able to be happy god damn it Rowling. (You can imagine how much my eleven year old self cried when I read the fifth book. Oh boy, the tears.)

Star Wars: Vader and Luke. Again, totally familial, father-son relationship only. (Speaking of scarring experiences, I once stumbled on a romance fic between the two, where yes, both of them were still father and son, and I have that summary etched into my brain permanently.) The way Vader obsessively hunts down Luke, the first emotional connection he has had with a person in literal decades! The way Luke has just ached all his life for a father figure, to the point where he will take a homicidal Sith lord if that’s who he is! How he never gives up on trying to redeem him! How Luke is right. Loud screeching.

Pirates of the Caribbean: Will Turner and Bootstrap Bill and Will Turner and Henry Turner. More sad father-son dynamics (you may be noticing a pattern here). Repeat what I said with the Star Wars relationships, only with more pirates and less homicide. (And way more parental abandonment guilt.)

Halloween: Michael Myers and Laurie Strode,  remake universe. Yet again, no romance, just a severely messed-up brother-sister relationship. I can’t begin to tell you why I like the horrific relationship between a serial killer and the little sister he was so obsessed with he ruined her life, completely traumatized her, and ended up leading to her death, but I do. Maybe it’s the dark obsession aspect of it, that in the midst of all his murders, there’s still one person Michael Myers longs to have a connection with, the baby sister who represented total innocence in his mind. Maybe it’s the “what could have been” aspect too, as Laurie never recognizes him or realizes their connection until it’s far too late. Maybe I need to re-examine my life choices. I’ll figure it out someday.

Bat Boy The Musical: Bat Boy/Shelley. Yes, this is a romance; yes, they are half-brother and half-sister, yes, you can get on me about this, but in my defense how about you watch the musical and NOT come out of it shipping these two against all your better instincts.

POTO: E/C/R, as stated above and for all those reasons. Oh, and you know what - The Phantom and Gustave from Love Never Dies. Can’t get away from those father-son ships. I actually care about that relationship than E/C or R/C in LND (maybe because both E/C and R/C suck in the sequel so what else am I going to latch onto).

Batman: Listed here, but my heart really lies with three ships. Jaytim is the first: it’s the whole “angry woobie destroyer of worlds who hates everyone meets seemingly well-adjusted and cheerful individual who is secretly hiding their own issues” dynamic. Bane/Talia from The Dark Knight Rises is the second. Doesn’t matter if it’s familial, friendship, protector and protectee, or romantic, I eat it up, and to be fair, it’s never explicitly stated what the relationship is in the movie. All we know is that the two grew up together in a hellhole prison, probably dependent on and solely trusting only one another, and that bond continues even after they leave, and not even death will make them leave one another. Finally, we have Jason Todd/therapy from the Arkham games. Because the poor guy needs it.

MCU: STEVE/BUCKY (aka Stucky). This ship (again, could be friendship or romantic) dominated my thoughts for four years. Steve’s fish-out-of-water status! Bucky’s horrific imprisonment under Hydra. The way the two find each other after and the angst. The fact that Steve refuses to kill Bucky and, even after seventy years, succeeds in breakthing through to him because their connection runs that deep. The fact that Marvel just ruined this relationship so now I have to rely on fanfic. Oh yes, and I also slowly fell into the Kastle ship (Frank Castle aka The Punisher and Karen Page). Another “hardened killer with sad backstory who connects to idealistic young woman with hidden darkness” dynamic.

Terminator: T-800 aka “Uncle Bob” and John Connor. Returning to sad father-son dynamics, I have this from Terminator 2. A robot learning emotions! A boy learning to take his place as a leader and all-loving hero. The bond they form, partially because the T-800 will do nothing else but protect John and partially because John has no father-figure of his own, so his robot bodyguard will do. THE ENDING.

ASOIAF/GOT: I actually have very few ships from here other than Arya/Gendry (and only when they’re older) and, weirdly, Theon/Sansa from the show. The Gendrya ship is just cute, it may well be the most wholesome ship on here, while Theonsa has shades of Stucky in it, I suppose, given that Theon has been tortured so badly he can barely remember his own name, until Sansa turns up and reminds him enough that he breaks out of it to help her.

Favorite characters from each of those:

Harry Potter: My favorite characters from here are probably more side characters, so I’ll just say Hermione Granger. Her focus on academics, fear of failure, and conviction that the library holds all the answers, felt all too reminiscent of myself.

Star Wars: Darth Vader,  no contest whatsoever. Cool mask, cool cape, cool lightsaber, and the absolute worst life one can imagine.

Pirates of the Caribbean: Interestingly, Will Turner. Yeah, I guess Jack Sparrow is cool and Elizabeth is absolutely awesome to watch and has the greatest change in the series, but oh-so-serious Will, with his deep loyalties and slow slide into moral ambiguity because of those loyalties, fascinates me.

Halloween: Laurie Strode, all versions. My favorite final girl, my survivor of trauma (except in the remake, where, well, she doesn’t survive). Also, her daughter in the Thorn trilogy, Jamie Lloyd, the most tragic little girl to walk across a horror movie screen.

Bat Boy The Musical: Ah, wow, haven’t thought about this. I guess Bat Boy and Shelley, more by default than anything.

POTO: Christine Daae, no contest. Love her character, love her arc, love her songs, love her costumes.

Batman: Listed here.

MCU: Bucky Barnes (unless he counts as a side character), but I also love Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanoff, Karen Page, Elektra Natchios... and I’ll leave it at that.

Terminator: John Connor. (There’s a reason I haven’t watched Dark Fate yet... or ever.)

ASOIAF/GOT: Three of them! Daenerys Targaryen, who I love because she tries so hard to rule well, who is so observant and cognizant of the things going on around her. Then Sansa Stark, who makes such astounding growth, who retains her empathy and compassion throughout, who is capable of startling perception and insight which most others underestimate. And finally, Cersei Lannister. She’s terrible. I love her.

And favorite side characters from each of those:

Harry Potter: Sirius Black may well have been my first fictional crush. But Remus Lupin is the kind of person (and teacher) I aspire to be.

Batman: I swear, depending on the comic series or movie, everyone is a side character. I’ll just link to my old ask again.

Star Wars: Batman syndrome all over again; every character in Star Wars might be a side character elsewhere, and every side character gets to be the main character of their own comic, book, movie, etc. Erm... I really liked Rose from the sequel trilogy and Chirrut Imwe from Rogue One. I find Mara Jade from the Legends universe fun to read. WAIT I GOT IT - Queen Amidala’s handmaidens from Episode I (Sabe, Rabe, Eirtae, Yane, Sache). Highly trained in both politics, decorum, and weaponry, able to be utterly nondescript or the Queen’s decoy at the drop of a hat? I love.

Pirates of the Caribbean: Hmm... you know what, I thought Syrena the mermaid was pretty cute.

Halloween: Rachel Carruthers! Your typical girl-next-door but well done and with a touching relationship with her foster sister. I will die mad about her death in the fifth movie.

Bat Boy The Musical: Uh.... I’ll get back to you on this...

POTO: Carlotta is super fun.

MCU: Oh heck, Dottie Underwood. (My taste in female characters goes like this: a) intelligent and observant, 2) sweet and compassionate, 3) batsh*t insane. She’s the third.)

Terminator: Not sure how much of a side character she is, but Kate Connor. Wife and second-in-command to John Connor, able to heal wounds and kick butt depending on what the movie requires.

ASOIAF/GOT: I’ll probably think of someone else, but you know what? Queen Rhaenys Targaryen, younger sister and wife to Aegon the Conqueror, whom he wed out of desire. Playful, spirited, loved to fly, sponsored musicians, initiated reforms for the smallfolk, what’s not to love? (Apart from one possibility of her death... but we don’t talk about that.)

[betweengenesisfrogs]

Homestuck is My Favorite Sprite Comic

Yes, you read that right.

Homestuck is my favorite sprite comic.

Those of you who remember the earlier days of the internet are probably looking at this post in disbelief right about now. Others of you might be scratching your heads, not knowing what I’m talking about.

But here’s my pitch: Homestuck is the culmination of an entire genre of internet art, and the tools that make it so powerful are the very tools that made that genre once so reviled.

Homestuck is the greatest and most successful sprite comic of all time.

And honestly, I’ve wanted to talk about that for ages, so let’s do it.

WHAT SPRITE COMICS WERE

Many of my readers are probably too young to remember the era of sprite comics. So: what were sprite comics?

Sprite comics were a genre of webcomics made entirely by taking pixel art from video games – especially character art, called “sprites,” but also backgrounds and other images—and placing them into panels to tell a story. They were near-ubiquitous on the internet in the early 2000s, emerging right as webcomics in general were seeking to establish themselves as an art form.

They were not, shall we say, known for their quality. The low bar to access meant that art skill was not an obstacle to starting one. The folks behind the huge swell of them tended to be young people, kids and early teenagers recreating the plots of their favorite video games with new OCs—not the most advanced writers or artists. They were the early 2000s’ quintessential example of ephemeral, childish art. Unfortunately, they look even worse today—blown-up pixels don’t hold up well when displayed on higher-resolution monitors.

Today, they’re mostly forgotten, remembered only as a weird, strange moment in the youth of the internet. Someone who evoked them today, such as a blogger who compared them to one of the most successful webcomics of all time, would be inviting good-natured teasing at the very least.

It would be unfair to dismiss them entirely, though. In this low-stakes environment, comics where the author could bring more skill—engaging writing, legitimately funny jokes, or especially, a real ability to work with pixel art—really stood out. (Unsurprisingly, these authors tended to skew a bit older.)

The obvious one to mention is Bob and George. Bob and George wasn’t the first sprite comic, but it was the most influential. Conceived initially as Mega Man-themed filler for a hand-drawn comic about superheroes, it quickly became a merging of the two concepts, with the original characters made into Mega Man-style sprites, full of running gags, humorous retellings of the Mega Man games, elaborate storylines about time travel, and robots eating ice cream. It was generally agreed, even among sprite comic haters, that Bob and George was a pretty good comic. Worth mentioning also are 8-Bit Theater, which turned the plot of the first Final Fantasy into a spectacular and hilarious farce, and of course Kid Radd, my second favorite sprite comic. (More on that later.)

But even if you weren’t looking for greatness—there was something just damn fun about them. The passion of sprite comic authors was clear, even if their ideas didn’t always cohere. To this day, I think the sprite comic scene has the same appeal pulp art does—it’s crude and rough, full of garbage to sift through, but every so often, something deeply sincere and bizarre shines through, and the culture of its authors is a fascinating object of study in itself.

Okay, full disclosure: I was one of the people who made a sprite comic. I’ve written about my experiences with that in more depth elsewhere, but yeah, I was on the inside of this scene, rather than a disinterested observer, and from the inside, maybe it’s a lot easier to see the appeal.

Still, let me make this claim: even with all their flaws, sprite comics were doing some incredibly interesting things, and Homestuck is heir to their legacy.

TAKE ME DOWN TO RECOLOR CITY

One of the problems people always had with sprite comics was the sprites themselves. They’re the most repetitive thing in the world. You just keep copying and pasting the same images over and over again, maybe with a few tweaks. That’s not really being an artist, is it? It’s so lazy. Re-drawing things from different angles keeps things dynamic, develops your skill, and makes your work better in general. Right?

I’m mostly in agreement. Certainly I think it’s fair to rag on the Control-Alt-Delete guy, along with other early bad webcomics, for copy-pasting their characters while dropping in new expressions and mass-producing tepid strips. And to be fair, digging through bad sprite comics often felt like an exercise in seeing the same slightly-edited recolors of Mega Man characters over and over again. You got really tired of that same body with its blobby feet and hands.

(It should be noted, though, that there were folks in the sprite comic scene who could pixel art the quills off a porcupine. I salute you, brave pixel art masters of 2006. I hope you all got into your chosen art school.)

All this said, I think the repetitive and simplistic nature of sprite comics was often their biggest strength.

THE POWER OF ABSTRACTION

In his classic work Understanding Comics, Scott McCloud makes an observation about cartooning that has stayed with me to this day.

McCloud notes that simple, abstract drawings, like faces that are only few lines and dots on a page, resonate with us more strongly than more detailed drawings. This is because our minds fill in what’s missing on the page. We ascribe human depth to simple gestures and expressions based on our own emotions and experiences – and this makes us feel closer to these characters as readers. Secretly, simple cartoons can be one of the most powerful forms of storytelling. If you want your readers to fall in love with your characters, draw them simply, and let them fill them in.

Video game sprites work very well in this regard. They have that same simplicity that cartoons do. In fact, I’d be willing to bet a huge part of the success of SNES-era RPGs was simple, almost childlike character sprites drawing people in. I think sprites did the same for sprite comics.

Here’s the weird thing: Bob and George worked. Despite four different characters being variations on the same friggin’ Mega Man sprite in different colors, they immediately began to seem like different people with distinct personalities. For me, George’s befuddled, helpless dismay immediately comes to mind whenever I picture his face, while with Mega Man himself it’s usually a wide-eyed, childlike glee. I would never confuse them. This, despite the fact that the only actual difference between their faces is that George is blonde. It’s pretty clear what happened. The personalities the author established for them through dialogue and storytelling shone through, and my brain did the rest.

Sprites, in short, were a canvas upon which the mind could project any story the author wanted to tell. Even the most minute differences in pixel art came to stand, in the best sprite comics, for wide divergences in personality and ideals, once the reader spent enough time with them to adapt to their style of representation.

Wait a minute, haven’t we seen this somewhere before? Character designs that focus on variations on a theme, with subtle differences that nonetheless render them instantly recognizable?

Oh, right.

Look at what greets us on the very first page of Homestuck. An absurdly simple cartoon boy, abstracted to a ridiculous degree—he doesn’t even have arms!—followed a whole bunch of characters that follow suit. Though many other representations of the characters emerge, these little figures never quite go away, do they? Why is that?

Simple: they’re very easy to manipulate. They’re modular—you can give John arms or not, depending on whether it’s useful. You can put him in a whole variety of poses and save them to a template. You can change out his facial expressions with copy and paste. You can give him a new haircut and call him Jake. It’s all very quick and easy.

Sprite comics proliferated because they were very easy to mass-produce. Andrew Hussie’s original conception of Homestuck was very similar: something he could put out very quickly and easily, where even the most elaborate ideas could rely on existing assets to be sped smoothly along. We all know the result: an incredible production machine, churning out unfathomable amounts of content from 2009-2012. I’d say it was a good call.

But it goes way deeper than that. The modular nature of sprites always suggested a kind of modularity to the sprite comic premise. George and Mega Man were different people, true, but also two variations on a theme. Was there something underlying them that they had in common? Perhaps their similarity says something like: We exist in a world which has a certain set of rules? One of my favorite conceits from Bob and George was that when characters visited the past, they were represented by NES-era Mega Man sprites, while in the present, they were SNES sprites, and in the future, the author used elaborate splicing to render them as 32-bit Mega Man 8 sprites or similar.

Suppose there was a skilled cartoonist thinking about his next big project, who wanted to tell a story centered around this kind of modularity, a narrative that was built out of iterative, swappable pieces by its very design. He might very well create a sprite comic named Homestuck.

Homestuck is a story about a game that creates a hyperflexible mythology for its players, where the villains, challenges, and setting change depending upon what players bring to the experience, yet which all share underlying goals and assumptions. What more perfect opportunity to create a modular story as well? Different groups of kids and trolls have motifs that get swapped around to produce new characters, whether that’s through ectobiology, the Scratch, or the eerie parallels between the kids and trolls’ sessions. And yet each character can be analyzed as an individual.

This is an incredible way to build a huge emotional investment from your readers. Not only does this kind of characterization invite analysis, the abstractions draw readers in to generate their own headcanons and interpretations. A deep commitment to pluralism is at the heart of Hussie’s character design. Then, too, it encourages readers to build their own new designs from these models. Kidswaps, bloodswaps, fantrolls—these have long been the heart of Homestuck’s fandom. And what are bloodswaps if not sprite recolors for a new generation? With the added bonus that now a change in color carries narrative weight, evoking new moods and identities for these characters in ways that early sprite comics could only dream of.

In Hussie’s hands, even the dreaded copy-and-paste takes on heroic depth of meaning. Even when Hussie moves away from sprites to his own loose art style, he continues to remix what we’ve previously see. Indeed, Hussie talks about how he would go out of his way to edit his own art into new images even when it would take more time than drawing something new. Why? Because he wanted to evoke that very feeling of having seen this before—the visual callback to go along with the many conceptual and verbal callbacks that echo throughout Homestuck. This is at the heart of what Doc Scratch (speaking for Hussie) called “circumstantial simultaneity:” we are invited to compare two moments or two characters, to see what they have in common, or how they contrast. Everything in Paradox Space is deeply linked with everything else. And Hussie establishes this in our minds using nothing less than the tool sprite comics were so deeply reviled for: the “lazy” repetition of an image.

(It’s fitting that some of the most jaw-droppingly gorgeous images in Homestuck—dream bubble scenery and the like—are the result of Hussie taking things he’s made before and combining them into fantastic dreamscapes.)

But it all started with the hyperflexible, adaptable character images Hussie created at the very beginning of Homestuck.

And if you need more proof that Homestuck is a sprite comic, I think we need look no further than what Hussie, and the rest of the Homestuck community call these images.

We call them sprites.

THE FIRST GENRE-BENDERS

Was Andrew Hussie influenced by sprite comics in the development of Homestuck? It’s hard to say, but as a webcomic artist in the first decade of the 2000s, he was surely aware of them. It’s likely that he quickly realized that his quick, adaptable images served the same purposes as a sprite in a video game or a sprite comic, and chose to call them that.

One purpose I haven’t mentioned up until now: sprites lend themselves very well to animations. In fact, in their original context of video games, that’s exactly what they’re for: frames of art that can be used to show a character running, jumping, posing, moving across a screen. It’s not surprising, then, that sprite comic makers quickly saw the utility in that.

Homestuck was, in fact, not the first webcomic to make Flash animations part of its story. There were experiments with various gifs and such in other comics, but I think sprite comics were among the most successful at becoming the multi-media creations that would come to be known as hypercomics..

Take a look at this animation from Bob and George. It represents a climactic final confrontation against a long-standing villain, using special effects to make everything dramatic, but ultimately, like many a Homestuck animation, leads to kind of a pyscheout. The drama and the humor of the moment are clear, though. This relies in large part on the music—which is taken directly from the game Chrono Trigger. This makes total sense. Interestingly, it also contains voice acting, which is something Homestuck never tried—probably because it would run contrary to its ideals of pluralism. What I find fascinating is that in sprite comics, animations like these served a very similar purpose to Homestuck’s big flashes: elevating a big moment into something larger-than-life. Another good example is this sequence from Crash and Bass. Seriously, it seems like every sprite comic maker wanted to try their hand at Flash animation.

(By the way, it’s a lot harder than it looks!! I envy Hussie his vectorized sprites. Pixel art is a PAIN to work with in the already buggy program that is Flash.)

The result: because of the sprites themselves, sprite comics were among the first works to play around with the border between comics and other media in the way that would come to be thought of as quintessentially Homestuck.

What it also meant was that another genre emerged in parallel with sprite comics: the sprite animation. Frequently these would retell the story of a particular game, offer a spectacular animated battle sequence, parody the source material, or all three. Great examples include this animation for Mega Man Zero, and this frankly preposterous crossover battle sequence. Chris Niosi’s TOME also found its earliest roots as an animation series of this kind. You also found plenty of sprite-based flash games, in which players could manipulate game characters in a way that was totally outside the context of the original works.

The website the vast majority of these games and animations were hosted on?

Newgrounds, best known to Homestuck fans as the website Hussie crashed in 2011 while trying to upload Cascade.

What’s less talked about is that Hussie was friends, or at least on conversational terms with, the owner of the site, hence the idea to host his huge animation there in the first place, and other flashes, like the first Alterniabound, were initially hosted there as well.

It’s hard to believe that Hussie wasn’t at least a little familiar with the Newgrounds scene. I suspect that he largely conceived of Homestuck as part of the world of “Flash animation—” which in 2009 meant the wide variety of things that were hosted on Newgrounds, including sprite animations.

The freedom and fluidity sprite comics had to change into games and animations and back into comics again was one of their most fascinating traits. Homestuck’s commitment to media-bending needs, at this point, no introduction. But what’s less known is that sprite comics were exploring that territory first—that Homestuck, in short, is the kind of thing they wanted to grow up to be.

PUT ME IN THE GAME

I would be a fool not to mention another big thing Homestuck and sprite comics have in common: a character who is literally the author in cartoon form, running around doing goofy things and messing with the story. This was an incredibly common cliché in sprite comics, no doubt because of Bob and George, who did it early on and never looked back. You might have noticed that the animation I linked above concerns a showdown between Bob and George’s author, David Anez—depicted, delightfully, as another Mega Man recolor—and a mysterious alternate author named Helmut—who is like Mega Man plus Sepiroth I think? It’s all very strange. I could ramble for hours about the relationship between Hussie and the alt-author villains of Homestuck and what it all means, but I’m not sure I can nail anything down with certainty for these two. Maybe Bob and George was never quite that metaphysical.

But yes, bringing the author into the story in some form was already a cliché by the time Homestuck started up. Indeed, I think that’s why Hussie’s character refers to it as “a bad idea” to break the fourth wall—he’s recognizing that people will have seen this before, and are already tired of this sort of shit. And then he goes and does it anyway and makes it somehow brilliant, because he’s Andrew Hussie.

Homestuck breathes life into the cliché by taking it in a metaphysical/metafictional direction. I don’t think that was really the motivation for most sprite comic authors, though. Let’s see if we can dig a little deeper.

I think the cliché kept happening because sprite comic authors were writing about a subject that very closely concerned themselves: video games. I’m only kind of joking. The thing about video games is that even though they’re made for everyone, playing through one yourself feels like an intensely personal experience. You develop an emotional relationship to a world, to its characters, that feels distinctly your own. Now, suddenly, thanks to the magic of sprites, you have an opportunity to tell stories about that world for others to read. Of course you’re going to want to put yourself in the story in some form.

When it wasn’t author characters in sprite comics, it was OCs. You know Dr. Wily? Well here’s my own original villain, Dr. Vindictus. You know Mega Man? Here’s my new character, Super Cool Man. He hangs out with Mega Man and they beat the bad guys together. Stuff like that. Most sprite comics retold the story of a game, or multiple games in a big crossover format, with original elements added in. There was quite a lot of “Link and Sonic and Mega Man are all friends with my OC and they hang out at his house.”

What’s interesting, though, is that because these sprite comics were very aware that they were about video games, this was where they sometimes got very meta. It started with humorous observation—hey, isn’t it funny that Link goes around breaking into people’s houses and smashing their pots? But sometimes, it grew into more serious commentary. Is Mega Man trapped in a never-ending cycle, doomed to fight the same fight against the same mad scientist until the end of time? Is it worth it, being a video game hero?

Enter Homestuck. What I’ve been dancing around this whole time is:

Homestuck is a sprite comic…because Homestuck is a video game.

Or more specifically, Homestuck’s a comic about a video game called SBURB, where the lines between the game and the comic about the game blur as characters wrestle with the narratives around them, both those encoded into the game and those encoded into our expectations.

Homestuck presents the fantasy of many a sprite comic maker: I get to go on heroic quests, I get to change the world and become a god. I get to be part of the video game. And then it asks the same question certain sprite comics were beginning to ask:

Is it worth it, to be that hero?

I want to tell you about my second favorite sprite comic, a comic called Kid Radd.

Kid Radd distinguished itself from other sprite comics of the time by being a completely original production. Its sprites looked like they could be from a variety of NES and SNES-era video games, but they were all done from scratch, and the games they purported to represent were all fictional. Kid Radd used animations with original music, and sometimes interactive, clickable games, to tell its story. It also used all sorts of neat programming tricks to make it load faster on the internet of the early 2000s, which was great—unfortunately, these same techniques made it break as web technology evolved, something Homestuck fans in 2019 can definitely relate to. The good news is, fans have maintained a dedicated and reformatted archive where the comics can still be seen and downloaded.

Kid Radd’s premise is that video game characters themselves are conscious and alive—more specifically, their sprites. Sprites developed consciousness as human beings projected personality and identity onto them, remaining aware of their status as video game constructs while also seeking to be something more. The story follows the titular Kid Radd, at first in the context of his own game, commenting on the choices the player controlling him. He must endure every death, every strange decision along the way to save his girlfriend Sheena. Then the story expands into a larger context as Radd, Sheena, and many other video game characters are released onto the internet as data. They try to find their own identities and build a society for themselves, but struggle with the tendency toward violence that games have programmed into them. The story culminates in an honestly moving moment where Radd confronts the all-powerful creators of their reality—human beings.

It’s a very good comic.

The first sprite comic authors wanted to fuse real life with video games. Later sprite comic authors decided to ask: what would that really mean? Would it be painful? Would you suffer? Would you find a way to make your life meaningful all the same? Despite the limitations of sprite comics, these ideas had incredible potential, and in works like Kid Radd, they flourished.

Homestuck is heir to that legacy.

It takes the questions Kid Radd was asking, and asks them in new ways. It tries to understand, on an even deeper level, how the rules of video games shape our own minds and give us ways to understand ourselves.

At its heart, Homestuck is a sprite comic, and it might just be the greatest of them all.

EPILOGUE

I’ve seen a lot of good discussion recently on how Homestuck preserves a certain era of the internet like a time capsule: its culture, its technology, its assumptions, its memes.

I think sprite comics, too, are part of the culture that created Homestuck. Do I think Hussie spent the early 2000s recoloring Mega Man sprites? No, probably not. But what I do know is that sprite comics were part of his world. The first webcomic cartoonists came of age alongside an odd companion, the weird, overly sincere, dorky little sibling that was sprite comics. Like them or hate them, you couldn’t escape them. They were there.

And maybe a certain cartoonist saw a kind of potential in them, in the same way he summoned Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff from the depths of bad gamer culture.

Or maybe he just knew, as some sprite comic authors did, that the time was right for their kind of story.

On a personal level—Homestuck came along right when I needed it.

Around 2009, the bubble that was sprite comics finally burst. People were getting tired of them, or growing out of them, and blown-up sprites no longer looked so good on modern monitors.

I was more than a little heartbroken. I’d enjoyed Bob and George, read my fill of Mega Man generica, and fallen utterly in love with Kid Radd. I’d been working on my own sprite comic for a long time out of a sense that there was huge potential in them that we were only scratching the surface of. I’d dreamed of maybe someday doing something as amazing as the best of them did. But I was watching that world disappear. I had to admit to myself that my work wasn’t going to continue to find an audience. That I could live with. But it was painful to think that the potential I sensed, the feats of storytelling I wanted to see in the world, would never be realized.

And then, in the fall of 2010, a friend linked me to a comic that broke all the rules, that mixed animation, games, music, images and chatlogs. A comic that crafted its own sprites, just as Kid Radd did, and remixed its images into an ever-expanding web of associations and meanings. A comic that took on the idea of living inside a video game with relish and turned it into a gorgeous meditation on escaping the ideas and systems that control us.

That this comic would exist, let alone that it would succeed. That it would become one of the most popular creations of all time, that it would surpass other webcomics and break out into anime conventions and the real world, that it would become such a cultural juggernaut, to the point where it’s impossible to imagine an internet without Homestuck—

I can’t even put into words how happy that makes me. It’s the reason I’m still writing essays about Homestuck nearly eight years after I found it.

And it’s why Homestuck will always be my favorite sprite comic.

-Ari

[Notes: The image of the kids came from the ever-useful MSPA Wiki—please support and aid in their efforts to provide a good source of info about Homestuck! They need more support these days than ever.

For more on Homestuck’s place as a continuation of the zeitgeist of early 2000s experimental webcomics, this article by Sam Keeper at Storming the Ivory Tower is excellent and insightful.

Thanks for reading, y’all.]

[jcmorrigan]

I don’t know if anyone here has been following the saga of my OC’s, which consists of me finally being brave enough to talk about them on Tumblr because what’s the use of guarding characters I don’t even have a manuscript for? And I wanna have fun. But mostly I’ve just been tagging fashion sets that belong to them, and as of late last night, too many prompts

I had been attempting to write a piece that introduces my villains in a SERIOUS manner by showing off the evil circus I plan to house them all in where each has a different tent they devote to an “act” that’s really their brand of villainy (dancing with deadly weapons, serving poison at the drinks garden, slaying innocent monsters for show, training horrific monsters from the deep sea), but I keep slacking on it, and I also keep adding new villains to the mix that would shake up the outline, so that’s stagnant.

But you know what I did figure out? Last night, I found a prompt that asked which of my OCs would go to Wal-Mart at midnight for fun. And my answer was that Alivain (the villainous leader, a smug young man who is not at all a Mozenrath ripoff) would take all his villain bros to Wal-Mart for a legitimate errand run, then turn around and realize they had all immediately scattered and just go “Oh no.” So here, I’m gonna introduce you to my villain squad by telling you what shit they would start in a Wal-Mart

Versafina is a weapons aficionado, so she’s gonna be looking for things that she can add to her repertoire of melee weapons. Especially small things that can fit in her hidden pockets...and not get noticed by security as she smuggles them out without paying. She spends way too long in the hardware section trying to figure out if a socket wrench is as good for scooping out eyes as she thinks.

Phantasia is busy giving herself a makeover in the cosmetics section, being the glam queen she is. She’s also opened it up for any teammates to come up to her and receive makeovers. She’s not paying for any of it either. Phantasia has also tested all the spray perfumes, then ran out of skin to spray, so she dragged Anastasios over. Anastasios is the physically oldest of the group, a rather elderly man who is about done with all these rowdy millennials (he’s just the character that’s there to say “OK Boomer” to), and he wanted to actually shop for the thing Alivain wanted except Phantasia is using him for more test perfume sprays and he won’t admit he likes smelling pretty.

Zangary is my resident monster hunter and also one of the sane men in the group and he probably ACTUALLY went to get what they came for in the first place and paid for it like a normal person, but no one noticed because no one expected anyone to actually do that. (*sweats nervously* Stoic monster hunter who wears purple and is shippable with the attractive sorcerer? I...I didn’t...it’s not the ADJL Huntsman no)

Dweixyn is lazy as hell and just found some patio furniture to collapse into and take a nap. Except she wears sunglasses everywhere she goes for the aesthetic, so the staff members who pass her briefly don’t realize her eyes are shut at first.

Belador wants two things out of life: to blow things up and to party hard. And because it’s probably not a good idea to blow up the Wal-Mart right now, he’s in the process of attempting to arrange several electronics and lamps to create a tiny pseudo-nightclub. He may also have hijacked the PA system for this purpose and is blasting techno.

Yridel is an angsty cyborg. She went right to the electronics section to see how many things she could connect to and corrupt. Eventually, she found a portable speaker through which she could just blast “Born Depressed” by Drill Queen on repeat, because it’s #mood for her, and just starts strutting around the store doing this to show off how edgy she is. Her snooty boyfriend who is usually narcissistic except when it comes to her, Lainnhartt, is following her and tossing confetti or an acceptable substitute in her wake, going, “That is my GIRL!”

Sherida is a monster who has a humanoid body, so she usually wears a bodysuit and a motorcycle helmet to pass among the general public. Well, tonight, she’s decided to take a walk in the mostly-deserted Wal-Mart with her helmet off so she can have a breather, but she came across some midnight shoppers who saw her paper-pale skin with blue veins, her lack of nose, her slit-pupil eyes, and her wide mouth full of fangs, and started panicking. So Sherida did the reasonable thing and began to eat them right there on the floor. Blood everywhere.

Lirian and Calpurniko are two teen girls - though Lirian is actually Fair Folk and has been alive for hundreds of years, but physically and mentally, she’s a teen. Lirian is a yandere and very exciteable; Calpurniko is a doomsday-device mechanic on a constant sugar high. So the two of them head right to the toy aisle to have a Nerf gun fight. Which is all fun and games until Calpurniko disappears into the hardware section for fifteen minutes and emerges with an augmented Nerf that can shoot (poisoned) foam darts at actual ballistic speeds.

Rachneira and Tomagi are also teens. Rachneira is a morbid Goth and also a variant of Fair Folk who is derived from spiders and therefore can spin webbing (and maybe has four arms? Undecided). Tomagi is an angsty sorceress who is mute. So the two of them decide to rifle through the cheap DVD bin, as kids do, and Rachneira keeps pulling out increasingly more disturbing horror films and stating in an ennui-laden tone that Tomagi should probably see them all before she dies. Then security blows by on their way to stop Belador from creating a mini-rave, they realize these kids are with the troublemakers, they turn on them, and Rachneira just webs her way up to chill out on the ceiling for a bit (as you do) while Tomagi gets angry and magically blasts the guards across the entire store, taking out several shelving units.

Diamandian puts on the airs of being a high-society man. What he is is a former manservant who killed his employer and usurped his fortune. He carries a white lace parasol wherever he goes. He heads right to the clothing section for the entire purpose of roasting every piece he finds, ripping it all off the hangers and throwing it to the ground because it’s all “Trash for the peasants!”.

Maraya is a pirate queen who is also an Eldritch Abomination thanks to an ancient tome of horrors. (Pink skin, silver or purple hair, the tattoos she previously had of nautical symbolism are now bright silver, pupil-less glowing eyes, stores a bunch of tentacles in her back.) She has a first mate, Soligeo, who has no eyes and many spidery limbs because he used the same book. Being that they’re pirates, they’re going to steal stuff, and they’re not gonna be subtle about it. They start ransacking the shelves and bragging very loudly about the fact that they will NOT BE PAYING FOR THIS. Unlike Sherida, Maraya doesn’t care so much about covering her monster exterior, and she likes scaring people for fun.

Kaxhalen is an intergalactic alien warlord (blue skin, silver hair) who acts like a stoic in the general public but is secretly neurotic and exciteable. He has sequestered himself in a fort made of bedding with several craft supplies he’s stolen to work on a therapy project.

Osmend Osmodias is a smug gambler, so he just sets up a shell game in the corner of the store and starts charging shoppers to find the hidden bean. When the guards try to oust him for soliciting, he argues that he’s not technically selling anything, and they can’t get anywhere unless they have the right charges on him.

Valencindri is this team’s token idiot and steals the toilet paper out of the men’s room, holding it up in triumph and screaming about how awesome it was that he got away with the (free) toilet paper without having to pay for it (it’s still free)!

Dr. Hope Lessness is a mad-scientist supervillain and sadist with cybernetic augmentations. She at first just starts breaking things at random to cause mayhem and monger fear, but then she hits the electronics section and gets distracted trying to wire together an iPod with a Fitbit and hook them to a drone mechanism that is somehow also a weapon. Her snarky robot companion, Mercy Lessness, makes several cracks about her attention span that she doesn’t dignify.

Orianelle is a biker witch swordswoman who likes to dress in leather shorts and tanks. She heads to the automotive section to pick up supplies to maintain her bike, but then some jerk dudebro makes a pass at her and she suplexes him into the nearest shelf, which causes an outcry. This somehow tuns into a mass brawl with Orianelle knocking ten men unconscious.

EDIT: I forgot Siersyrei on the first go. She’s a werewolf, but the joke is she’s more like a “were-human” because she defaults to acting wolflike even when in human form and refers to herself in the third person. So she’s over here literally eating dog food and looking for any sudden motions indicating prey she can hunt until Lirian shows up with a laser pointer to drive her insane.

By the time security has dispersed enough to actually be a problem, Alivain hijacks the PA system to announce “I’m going to bomb the Wal-Mart,” which is his code word to let the others know that he’s going to bomb the Wal-Mart. Everyone evacuates, and he dramatically activates a bomb that reduces the store to a column of flames as he dances in the parking lot victoriously with his back to the carnage.

Also, Zangary probably bought the wrong thing, so now they have to find a new Wal-Mart and start all over.