#you could decide to get good at math or learn to play piano or how to ride a bike or draw or sing or a new language
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mollypaup · 2 months ago
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It makes me really sad when I hear people say they could never learn something. It might take longer than most people but I do genuinely think anyone could learn anything.
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libraryofgage · 10 months ago
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The Prince and the Metalhead (2)
Part of: Steve Deserves Good Parents, Actually
Debbie and Fester Addams One | Two | Three | Four Rick and Evelyn O'Connell One | Two | Three Harley Quinn One 10th Doctor and Rose One | Two (on the way!) Scooby Gang (there are plans for this one lmao, so plz be patient with me orz) Jedidiah and Octavius (from Night at the Museum) One Queen Clarisse Renaldi One | Two (you're here!)
I know I just posted part one but I've got Thoughts for this AU that include: Steve's first birthday in Genovia and then his 16th, his conversation with his grandmother about attending public school in America for his senior year, and then we get into him attending Hawkins High and meeting Eddie!
So, yeah, plans lmao
Anyway, if you see any typos, no you didn't ;)
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"You'll have a rotating course schedule. Mondays and Wednesdays will focus on math and social studies. Tuesdays and Thursdays will be science and literature. Friday will be Royalty lessons and the history of Genovia. We can also include an elective, if you'd like."
Steve blinks, staring at Sue for a moment before glancing at Jonathan and Robin. Jonathan is looking through a book of photography and Robin is idly scratching behind Dart’s ears. "Will we all have the same elective?" Steve asks.
"Not unless Jonathan and Robin want to join you," Sue says, looking at Steve expectantly. She's got a pen at the ready to write down what he says, and it suddenly feels like a lot of pressure.
Is there a wrong answer here? Is there an answer that gets him sent back to his parents? He looks down, biting the inside of his cheek so hard he tastes blood. Before he can lose himself in his thoughts, a cold and wet nose presses against his hand. Steve blinks, smiling at Dart and picking her up to hold close. "What kind of electives are there?" he asks.
Sue hums softly, flipping to another page on her clipboard. "Possible electives include art, music, theatrical performance, physical education, equestrian studies, botany, and foreign languages, to name a few."
"I'll be taking photography lessons," Jonathan says, looking up at Steve and gesturing to his book.
Robin nods and leans back on her palms. "I'll be doing the physical stuff. Like learning how to fight and practicing ballet to improve my balance," she says, leveling a look at Steve that dares him to say anything about the ballet.
Steve wouldn't, though. He doesn't want to make Robin angry enough to ditch him. He looks down at Dart, thinking for a moment before asking, "Can I take more than one?"
"Of course, but you're limited to three for now," Sue says.
What would be the most helpful? Foreign languages, probably, since he'll definitely have to speak with ambassadors from other countries at some point. He should also learn something that can be shown off, a skill that he could pull out at functions to make his grandmother proud or distract guests.
"What language should I learn?" he asks.
Sue thinks for a moment, tapping her pen against her chin. "Mandarin. It's a business language, and we have close relations with a few representatives from China and Hong Kong. If you'd like to learn a Romantic language first, though, Spanish is good."
"I'll learn Mandarin," Steve decides, nodding once to himself. "And music. I want to learn to play...hmm...the piano."
With a nod, Sue writes his electives down. "Let me know if you'd like to add an elective later, Your Highness. In my opinion, though, your current courses will keep you properly challenged for now."
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Sue wasn't kidding about his academics being challenging. Steve struggles in math, muddles his way through science, drags himself through literature, and is ready to drop when he hits social studies. He'd ask the tutors to spend more time on topics, but Robin and Jonathan seem to have no problem keeping up, and Steve can't bring himself to disrupt their pace.
His Mandarin lessons are going just slightly better if only because the tutor seems to recognize that slower is better for him. After almost a month, he's starting to understand intonation and vocal variation better, and he can recognize a few characters on sight.
Piano lessons are also going well. His tutor there doesn't burden him with theory; she introduces the keys, shows him how to read sheet music, and then lets him choose songs to learn. Steve feels the most at ease when he's squinting at sheet music and slowly pressing piano keys into something recognizable.
The lessons he really looks forward to, however, are the ones for his Royalty Education. He gets to see his grandmother then, and she spends the whole day with him. Even better, something about this stuff just clicks. He's good at fixing his posture and memorizing silverware placement. He bows just right on his first try and his grandmother compliments his wave.
By the end of the lesson, she'll be smiling, her pride obvious, and take him for a walk in the gardens or to eat cookies in the kitchen.
"Royalty requires maintenance," Clarisse says, standing in front of Steve with relaxed shoulders. "You maintain your demeanor, your image, your knowledge of foreign dignitaries, your understanding of the people’s needs, and your humility. But you must also maintain your pride and your boundaries."
"That sounds like a lot," Steve says, idly tugging at the hem of his shirt.
"It can be overwhelming, but it becomes second nature in time," Clarisse explains, smiling reassuringly. "When you're royalty, you are constantly watched. Many eyes are kind or curious, but others are malicious, and you want to do everything you can to disappoint the malicious ones."
"How?"
"By acting like the Crown Prince you are."
"What kind of prince am I?" Steve asks, finally voicing the question that's been lingering since these lessons started. What kind of prince does his grandmother want? What kind of prince would best serve the people? What kind of prince will be so loved by all that nobody could even think of thinking about getting rid of him?
Clarisse hums, thinking for a moment. "I suppose a good one," she says, her slight smile telling Steve that she's only lightly teasing. "My hope is that you'll be kind and competent. You will make Genovia prosperous without compromising tradition. You won't allow politics to stand in the way of doing what's right by the people of Genovia. But this is a tiring job, so I hope you'll learn how to balance your duties with relaxation."
It's a lot, but Steve can do it. He can be that kind of prince, especially for the country and grandmother that's offered everything he's ever wanted and more. He nods once. "Okay," he says, "What do I need to learn, then?"
Clarisse smiles fondly at him. "Let's start by reviewing Genovian history. Only by knowing the past can you face the future."
With that, she places a book on Steve's desk and doesn't wait for him to open it before telling him about Genovia's founding.
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Steve has weekends off from classes, which leaves him with more free time than he knows what to do with when he doesn't have to clean a house or make his own meals. So, he's bored, and telling Robin that he was bored was a huge mistake after she suggested riding bikes around the garden only to learn Steve didn't know how.
She'd insisted that he should learn, insisted that Clarisse be the one who teaches him, and insisted on hearing no objections.
And now he's here, standing in front of Clarisse's desk and staring down at his feet as she finishes writing something on the paper in front of her. Joe is standing just to her right, hands behind his back.
"Okay," Clarisse says, gently placing her pen on the desk before looking at Steve with an encouraging smile. "What did you want to ask me, Steve?"
Steve bites the inside of his cheek, takes a deep breath, and looks up. "Well, um, Robin wants to ride bikes, but I don't know how," he says.
"Well, that's easily fixed," Clarisse says, reaching for a phone at the corner of her desk. "I'm sure a member of staff is free to teach you."
Before she can pick up the phone, Steve finds himself blurting out, "Well, I...I was hoping...you could teach me."
Clarisse freezes, blinking twice with confusion before looking at Steve. "You want me to teach you?" she asks. When Steve nods once, she sighs softly. "A queen does not ride bikes. Besides, I have too much work to complete. Perhaps I could accompany you for a walk this evening to make up for it."
Despite himself, despite bracing for rejection, it still hurts. In the three months he's been in Genovia, Clarisse has agreed to just about every request he's made. Every held breath as he waits for cruel words has been released with unprecedented relief when none came. Even when he broke something---a priceless vase, according to Jonathan---his grandmother had simply surveyed the damage, thanked him for being honest, and asked him to avoid kicking soccer balls in the presence of priceless vases in the future.
Perhaps Steve has gotten too comfortable. He shouldn't be pushing like this. If he wants his grandmother's affection, he should know when to hold himself back.
So, despite the unfamiliar urge to ask again in case Clarisse might change her mind, Steve nods once. "I look forward to walking with you, Grandmother," he says, his voice quiet. He glances up, waiting long enough to see Clarisse's smile before turning on his heel and leaving the office as quickly as he can.
Clarisse watches him go, her head slightly tilted as the door closes silently behind Steve. She nods once, glad that Steve is sensible enough to understand things like work and propriety, and picks up her pen once more.
"If I may speak freely, Your Majesty?" Joe asks.
"At this point, Joe, you may as well assume the answer is yes."
"With all due respect, Your Majesty, and please pardon my French, my experience has been that assuming makes an ass out of you and me."
It takes a moment for Clarisse to understand the joke. When she does, she can't help her amused smile. "Fair enough," she says, "Go ahead, Joe."
"Do you remember what I said about being Steve's grandmother?"
"Yes, of course."
"Perhaps now is one of those moments where being a grandmother is more important than being a queen. His Highness does not ask for much, and he is not the kind to ask more than once, even if he really wants something. I imagine it took a significant amount of courage to ask you to teach him in the first place."
"Are you suggesting that I...I risk making a fool of myself for all to see?" Clarisse asks.
"I am suggesting you spend time with your grandson, who asks very little of you because he does not believe he can ask for anything."
Clarisse is silent a moment, letting Joe's words process and settle in her brain. Finally, she sighs and gestures to the papers on her desk. "I have work to complete," she says.
"Your Majesty, editing these proposals was on your schedule two weeks from now. You are ahead of your work. A break would not be unreasonable or unwarranted."
Well, when he puts it like that.
Clarisse sighs, leans back in her chair, and looks up at Joe. He's still staring at the door, giving no indication that he feels her eyes on him, but she knows he does. "Have a groundskeeper retrieve bikes and safety gear and meet us in the garden," she says, standing from her chair and bracing herself to look like an utter fool.
Her apprehension fades away fifteen minutes later. It can't hold last when she sees Steve's surprised and delighted expression at her presence. As she helps him put on knee and elbow pads, shows him how to pull the helmet's strap tight, and holds the bike steady as he sits on it, Clarisse decides a little foolishness is perfectly fine (necessary, even) if it will keep the smile on Steve's face.
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Tag List (let me know if you'd like to be added to future parts!)
@y4r3luv, @potato-of-the-lord,
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aubins · 3 months ago
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TOA Anniversary Munday
Celebrating TOA and the people who contribute to make our group what it is.
Repost, don't reblog. Only fill in what you feel comfortable sharing!
Happy anniversary, TOA! Here's to many more years spent together.
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Name: darcy, but i also go by qiu!
Pronouns: they/he
Birthday (no year): january 9th
Where are you from? What is your time zone? sea & gmt+8
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How long is your roleplay experience? god who knows HAHA not me i fear
How were you introduced to roleplaying as a whole? .........kik..........and then amino when i really got into it a bit more lmfao
How were you introduced to TOA? through the heart & soul ad on twitter!
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Do you have any pets? unfortunately not i must live vicariously through family & friends
What is your favorite time of year and why? i do love the -ber months generally. it's nice to have cooler weather as someone who lives in a tropical country though it's not by much these days i fear
What is your IRL occupation? i'm a full-time university student atm studying psychology!
Some interests and things you like/enjoy? writing of course but for less obvious answers: piano, photography, badminton, archery, history, mathematics, languages, etc etc i like learning basically haha
What non-Fire Emblem games do you play? 13 sentinels, somnium files, life is strange, genshin impact, honkai: star rail, zenless zone zero, pokemon. prosekai sometimes. and i love love the ace attorney series so much miles edgeworth among us is the funniest shit i've ever seen
Favorite Pokemon type & Pokemon: fairy type! and it's both mimikyu & ditto really i couldn't pick but i think i said ditto last year so i will say mimikyu this year haha
Tell us some funfacts and trivia about yourself! i used to do international math competitions when i was younger! haven't done since the pandemic but they were good fun i do love math & competition haha so put them together i'm bound to enjoy myself
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How did you get into Fire Emblem? my brother bought fe3h & i decided to play it too. i simply never made my way out of that rabbit hole
What Fire Emblem games have you played? fe11, fe12, fe16 (+ hopes), & fe17 + i've watched playthroughs of tellius & sov! nothing much different from last year except i've since watched a playthrough of awakening as well. still haven't finished my actual awakening playthrough but one day...
First & Favorite Fire Emblem games: i said fe3h for my first last year but i think it might have actually been heroes now that i'm really thinking about it LOL not seriously in the slightest though i'm p sure i dropped it after the first few days until i properly got into fire emblem. don't have much of a favorite but i enjoy 3hopes purely because musou gameplay tickles a very specific part of my brain
List your 5 favorite Fire Emblem characters across the series! yuri, alear, est, shez, and lucina
Who was the first character ever to make you go “ooh I like this one in particular” and why? Can be any context and reason! yuri. to no one's suprise least of all my own but also the whole ashen wolves house really. you could say i really like those guys in particular
Any Fire Emblem crushes? 😳 nope
If you’ve played (or are familiar with) the following games, who was your first S support? Who would you S support nowadays? - Three Houses: claude & yuri- Engage: gave the pact ring to veyle my first playthrough then reset it after. honestly i don't know though maybe gregory or timerra
Favorite Fire Emblem class? i like mage cannoneer. funny guys
If you were a Fire Emblem character, what would be your class and stats? Would you be playable? dancer except i play you a silly tune on my keyboard. high speed & dexterity and ok magic stats then everything else is probably dogshit LMFAO
If you were a Three Houses character, what would be your affiliation? fear the deer!!!
If you were an Officers Academy student, what would be your boons, banes and potential budding talent? - Boons: sword, reason - Banes: axes, faith, heavy armor - Budding Talent: bow
If you were an Engage character, which nation would you originate from? solm is my favorite but i'd probably want to live in firene
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How do you pronounce TOA? 🤔 separate letters
Current TOA muses: just this guy right here
Past TOA muses? marianne, caeda, est, kvasir, clarisse, & timerra! if there's been anyone else i'm very sorry to have forgotten you haha
Who was your first TOA muse? If you no longer have them, can you see yourself picking them up again? miss marianne von edmund :softsmile: anyway probably not & she's in good hands now besides
Do you believe you have a type of character you gravitate towards writing? i'm sure i do but i wouldn't be able to name it myself haha but i like to think i tend to have some kind of variety in character archetypes and tropes i enjoy writing
Do you have characters or types of characters you don’t think you can handle writing, but wish you could? if i like them enough to put in the effort i could write most anyone i think
What kind of scenes, situations etc do you believe you enjoy writing the most? anything that significantly alters the relationship between two characters. even better if it's for the worse really i do enjoy antagonistic relationships. but yeah i loooove developing relationships between muses. especially with a muse that barely trusts anyone besides themself. yuri never does what i want them anyway to do so it's great for me, really
Do you have any scenario in mind for your muse(s) that gets you thinking “man I hope I get to write this one day”? i would really love to write yuri during their time as a student at the officers academy. or an au where they are a student at the officers academy in present time. i'd like to explore their role as count rowe's “son” more in depth one day as one of if not their longest lasting identity (excluding their actual one obviously LOL). less specific but i just love aus in general i would love to do more aus
Favorite TOA-related memories? est & sirius getting their attacks redirected at one another and whiffing all of them always makes me laugh. the harmony lance phalanx strats were also funny i do think fondly of that arena. happyland was really fun though one of my favorite events so far for sure :] i blow a kiss to north island yuri's home away from home & east island week 4
Present or past tense? present tense is my general go to for roleplay but i don't mind either or
Normal size text, small text, no preference? small text is easier for me to parse personally but i don't have any preference from my partners
Got any potential muse delusions to share? 😉 not so much delusions as they are old muses but i do mourn that i never quite got kvasir & timerra off the ground as much as i'd have liked to. if i ever find the time i'd love to revisit both one day. shez is also a constant plague upon my mind i just love a purple guy what can i say
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castielmacleod · 2 years ago
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Fics I will never write: IT GETS BETTER
Set in a canon divergent season 11, It Gets Better is a short fic exploring the abusive relationship between Cas and Dean, from Cas’ perspective. Traumatised from being nearly killed by the man he loves, struggling with agoraphobia, anxiety attacks, and depression, a broken-winged angel contemplates what it is he wants so he can decide if this is working or not. Character study with themes of trauma, self-worth, unrequited love, the paralysing effects of being trapped in an abusive relationship, and healing.
#Fics I will never write#Safeantidestiel#My posts#Not that I’m obligated to spill my guts on tunglr dot com but this would be coming from a place of authenticity.#If I could write it in the first place that is#This would be very depressing but it ends with Cas learning to play piano as an outlet#The scene is very clear in my head. Cas finally works up the courage to venture outside the bunker and ends up at this little pub#that has a piano and he goes and sits at it and finds a tune he likes#The pub is mostly empty except for the bartender really. And she comes over to talk to him because she plays piano too#And Cas says he’s actually never played before but *some ridiculous angel thing about music and notes and math* that let him figure it out#And it goes over the bartender’s head but she ends up teaching him the heart & soul duet and they play it together#Then she closes up the bar and tells him goodbye and to keep well and he stands there outside the door until she’s out of sight and then#breaks down crying.#And anyway some more things happen and then one day when Dean is out hunting Cas decides to leave the bunker for good#I am putting this in my fics I’ll never write series but I actually could see myself pushing to write this one. It’s meant to be short#Like not multi chapter or anything. And I need to get some of this shite off my chest anyway#Like I need to put how their relationship makes me feel into words beyond ranting tumblr posts you know#<— Cas and Dean’s relationship I mean#Tw abuse
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collisiondiscourse · 3 years ago
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Man, why does it feel like the threshold for success has a time limit? I always feel like if I'm not an insanely popular artist or powerful influencer by the time I turn eighteen, then I am an utter failure and a waste of my teenage years. I think one of the biggest pitfalls of how the generation of kids today has been raised is that we've basically been socialized to think that our best achievements have to come in our youth or else they become virtually worthless.
Like... Oh? you're a talented pianist and played in front of an auditorium of hundreds at an opera house? how old were you when that happened?
A forty-seven-year-old would be met with a few impressed nods, maybe, and people congratulating them for all their hard work and experience.
A fourteen-year-old would get news articles. they'd go viral on the internet and thousands of people would be clambering over each other to sing praises of how they were blessed with such innate talent.
I get it. It's impressive, right? Because they're young and haven't had plenty of years of experience. These kids, by all means, deserve all the praise and attention for working hard to get where they were!
But that's not the case, is it? And the culture of people putting more credit for young people's achievements doesn't even fuckin end there.
Because not only does this exact same pattern happen with literally every single thing ever, even totally non-competitive hobbies like painting, it happens with such frequency that it's considered normal. Articles use age markers about successes to serve as clickbait for their articles. Cable companies start shows purely about young prodigies and how they've beaten their adult competitors. Because who wouldn't wanna hear about a ten-year-old chess champion, right?
And what's even worse is that it then becomes a competition even among young people themselves! You scroll down on a video of a pre-teen playing Winter Wind and I promise you there will be at least one asshole saying shit like "This kid is not impressive. I saw a nine year old do the same thing the other day!"
It eats away at you! It really fucking does! because we go down this stupid rabbit-hole wherein younger and younger kids get paraded around and raised to be prodigies and meanwhile here you are, sixteen, and having a panic attack because you can't go back in time and force your eight-year-old self to keep playing the violin. It's stressful. It aches. Instead of bringing up younger people around us, we're stuck in this miserable zone where we constantly get compared and pitted against each other because we couldn't "maximize our childhood".
Isn't it enough to just... exist?
There have already been many conversations on the nature of college. How it's utter BS that people have to choose what career they want for the rest of their lives as early as junior year in HS. But what a lot of people don't talk about is just how early people are forced to decide what hobbies they want to do for the rest of their lives. People who start learning how to play an instrument at 28 can't do so without constantly being questioned why they started so late. A drawing with decent coloring garners more credit and attention for the average tween than the struggling middle-aged woman, despite both having an equal amount of experience with visual arts.
Parents constantly tell their children to study harder, to practice more--to just keep on work, work, working until their children become the perfect model dolls they use flex to one another over brunch. It's constantly having your name be followed up by your latest achievement and not anything about who you are as a person.
"This is Codi. She is a straight-A student and got invited to compete at Harvard."
"This is Codi. She is on her school's math team and knows how to play the piano."
"This is Codi. She is--"
I am a human being, thank you.
It's never "This is Codi, and he loves fashion and losing at video games." or "This is Codi, and he likes listening to annoying pop songs from the early 2010s and laying down in the rain."
Why? because none of that matters! None of that is worth listening to because anything less than what I can do to represent my family, my school, my team, my country will never be anything more than a waste of time. It's toxic, how today's generation of teenagers have to be celebrities or important figures or champions or prodigies before they are people.
It gets worse, though.
People start counting your talents like tally marks for points. You can't "just be an artist" anymore. If you draw, then you also have to be good at writing. And poetry. And graphic design. And a sport. Oh, you only know one language? Oh, you've only learned the basics of the guitar? It's like a fucking marker, ticking off boxes to determine the worth of these teenagers on the marketability of their achievements.
And, okay, it's a misrepresentation to only blame parents, right? Because it's a systematic thing. A new societal expectation for kids to be the next fucking Renaissance--with peer pressure for things like relationship experience and wild stories too. We kids now worry about not being special enough, not phenomenal enough, or beautiful enough, or talented enough, or smart enough, or experienced enough. And it's weird!
It's weird how teens now flex how tired and burnt out they are! It's weird how I've had conversations that turned into competitions of how many bullshit responsibilities we have on our plate. It's weird how I've met kids on the honor roll that are so adamant to prove to people that they've gone to parties, had alcohol, and slept around.
It's a goddamn tragedy, watching so many of my peers turning into burnouts before they've even graduated high school.
We are expected to be the most. If that one singer could do it, if that one global warming activist could do it, if that one Olympic athlete could do it--then why can't you? Why can't you have over 20.7k followers on Twitter? Why can't you have started your own band and release a popular album? Why can't you have published your own book by now? Why can't you be good enough?
I sit here, typing away at this stupid post and being unhappy and feeling like I am not good enough. I am an artist. I am a writer. I speak more than one language and play more than one instrument. I used to be a straight-A student and nationally competed in maths and sciences competitions. I am an international finalist for my sport and have multiple gold medals from foreign countries.
Yet still, I feel like my timer is running short.
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scribblingfangirl · 4 years ago
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WITH LOVE, THE GOSTS | Julie and The Phantoms - Part Three
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Author’s Note: I decided that this fic trilogy occurs a year after the season one final, making Julie and Y/N almost (or already) 17. Also… this part turned out waaay longer than expected. Which is why there is going to be a fourth part because I have one last idea but didn’t want to rush to write it. And to think this all started because of a rushed (haha) 1k Oneshot. I should really start to write more spontaneously, it seems like good things come out of it. Anyway, Enjoy! :D
Songs mentioned in this chapter (in this order): Now or Never & Wake Up by JaTP | Don't Stop Me Now by Queen | Rude by MAGIC! | Don’t Laugh At Me by Mark Wills | Don’t You Worry ’Bout a Thing by Tori Kelly | Still Learning by Halsey | Ayo Technology by 50 Cent | My version of My Name Is Luke by Trevor Wilson | Let’s Forget About It by Lisa Loeb | Let's Just Get Naked Lyrics by Joan Osborne | Hey by Pixies
word count: ~ 3.9k
summary: Even after meeting the boys they still aren’t tired of helping you out and they each have their own little ways to do it.
warnings:  // (english is not my first language, not beta-read)
| PART ONE | PART TWO |
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Knowing that ghosts existed was an absurd feeling (even though you had always believed or hoped that there was more out there than just this world, especially with all those planets that had been discovered by NASA), but knowing that there were three certain ghosts that liked you enough to kindly haunt you, well… that was just plain unimaginable somehow. Yet, still less anxiety awakening than you expected. 
After Julie let you meet the guys for the first time you thought you were prepared to accept that you would not be able to talk to them unless they played something (after all, you had Flynn to groan about that), but the occasional giggle from Julie and her glances into nothing still sent chills down your spine.
So you started to always look around very suspiciously whenever you were over at her house and make obscene hand movements just to be sure that the boys would move before you walked somewhere or sat down (which just earned chuckles from Flynn and annoyed sighs from Julie - “Just because you can’t see them, doesn’t mean they can’t see you. They know where you are, so please stop, or else my dad will call your parents and send you to Dr Turner as well.” The boys found it hilarious and liked to imitate you whenever they came too close to you.) 
The boys also still kept doing little things for you, just not so in secret anymore (though… Reggie was never one for subtlety). Whenever you seemed to have had a bad day (or whenever they just wanted to make you smile) you knew you could count on them having something prepared for you. 
You soon discovered that anything related to food (which sometimes were extremely odd and bizarre combinations) was Luke’s doing (except for pizza and meatballs, according to Julie that was always Reggie). And you knew it was Alex whenever it was something more calm and soothing, yet sometimes a little bit clumsy. And whenever it was blatantly obvious and/or slightly weird (in a good way!) it was Reggie. 
Well, no. Not always in a good way. One time you came back from school and your whole room was filled with glitter and butterflies and a small note with a little ‘Sorry!’ on it was pinned to your desk - cleaning that had been a pain in the a-. But you couldn’t be angry at Reggie, even though you weren’t quite sure what his ultimate goal would have been. 
Speaking of REGGIE...
All those helpful little deeds and nice gestures were always done within the limits of your house (mostly room) or Julie’s house and the studio, which is why you almost let out a loud yelp when suddenly during a math test your pen started to move on his own, filling out the empty space (because yes, you hadn’t been doing very much other than staring helplessly at the paper in front of you). Quickly you grabbed the pen as well (loosely and while trying to ignore the fact that you were practically holding hands with one of the guys) so that nobody would see a floating pen as you did a few weeks ago at Christmas.
From the corners of your eyes, you saw Julie slightly move her head towards you, as if she was listening to you - or rather someone right beside or behind you. ‘Of course. I can’t see them, so the only way to help me is by physically grabbing the pen, but Julie can hear and see them, so they (whoever this is - because let’s be honest, none of the guys really looks like a math genius) only have to tell her the corrects solutions and how to get there. My money’s on Alex.’
You were kind of shocked, and weirdly proud when Julie came up to you after class and said: “Reggie’s not so questionable after all, huh?” (Though… you should’ve guessed it, you did say subtlety wasn’t Reggie’s strong suit.) So you just giggled and shook your head while leaving some of your books in your locker (alongside the fact that Reggie was probably almost (if not!) hugging you from behind - you shuddered at that thought, it’s not like you were already awkward around living boys your age, no need to add ghosts to that list!)
A week later you and Julie entered the studio with blank faces and hanging shoulders. Julie threw a weak little wave towards the piano and sighed while you threw the blankets and snacks you were holding carelessly on the ground and let yourself fall face-first onto the couch, not being able to hide your smile anymore.
“We got our math exams back… yes the one Reggie helped us with.”
You couldn’t see what Julie was doing, but you heard her gasp and whisper “No! Reggie…” after a while. Then she was standing beside you, nudging your shoulder and willing you to sit up, but you didn’t bulge, needing a few more seconds to wipe the smile off your face again.
Faking to disgruntledly accept defeat as Julie’s nudges got stronger (the couch was really comfortable, you totally understood Luke now) you sat up and looked at Julie. “Who’s going to tell them?” you said with a heavy voice and felt how the couch dipped beside you. Raising your eyebrows you quickly glanced to the side (obviously not seeing anybody or anything) and looked back at Julie questioningly. 
She nodded, telling you that it was indeed Reggie and gave you the okay to drop the bomb.
You sighed as you turned back around, facing the wall on the other side of the studio and hoped that Reggie would ignore the fact that you were probably talking to his ear or something. “So Reggie… the help you gave us on the math final? Well…,” you couldn’t keep your face straight any longer and jumped onto the couch, “WE ACED IT! I WOULD HUG YOU IF YOU WEREN’T MADE OUT OF CUTE AIR!” (Okay… maybe there was a little bit too much serotonin involved.)
Julie added smiling, “And I’m happy to announce that due to my good grades my father allowed Julie and The Phantoms to play at the upcoming Summer Music Festival!”
A guitar riff filled the studio, followed by a short drum intro and with a ‘puff!’ the boys appeared in front of you, beaming and glowing at the news. Reggie even threw a wink at you when you smiled back and said: “Thank you!”
Don't look down 'Cause we're still rising Up right now And even if we hit the ground We'll still fly Keep dreaming like we'll live forever But live it like it's now or never!
This allowed LUKE…
The music festival was an experience you would never forget. You were very happy Ray managed to persuade your parents to let you accompany Julie (sadly Flynn had no such luck). Not only did you turn 17 and the boys made sure to have the whole crowd sing ‘Happy Birthday’ to you (as soon as you were back home you would add an extra point to your to-do: ‘find out how to kill ghosts a second time’), but the boys rocked the stage and Julie stood up taller and shined brighter than ever before. 
Gone (yet not forgotten) were the painful shocks and the fear of never performing again and the serenity of the guys was visible. 
It was the last night of the music festival when Julie got the phone call from her father. He would come by to get her the next morning and they would drive directly to visit other family members and spend the rest of the summer holidays there. 
Of course, Julie was excited to see her cousins and aunts and uncles again, but she also felt bad to leave you to drive back alone (you had come with your car jam-packed with all the necessary equipment you needed and that wasn’t provided by the festival).
“Don’t worry! It’s only a four-hour drive! I’ve got good music, podcasts and audiobooks to keep me company and back home Flynn will be waiting. It sadly looks like I’m going to survive without you.” 
Early the next morning Julie and some newfound fans of Julie and The Phantoms helped you load the equipment into your car and you said goodbye to Julie. Expecting the boys to just directly puff back to Los Feliz you didn’t waste any time and entered your car, connected your phone with the stereo and started to blast your favourite Broadway musicals.
You must’ve been on the road for half an hour when suddenly the playlist stopped and ‘Wake Up’ started to play.
So wake that spirit, spirit!
Confused you scrunched up your nose and touched the touch screen displaying the music system, trying to change it back to your playlist. But instead, the music changed yet again.
(Don't stop me now) 'Cause I'm having a good time (Don't stop me now) Yes, I'm havin' a good time I don't want to stop at all
“What the hell?” you muttered, staring at your stereo for a quick second before focusing back on the road, “Why you always going crazy on me dude?”
Once again the music switched.
Why you gotta be so rude? Don't you know I'm human too?
It took you a hot minute to understand what was going on and then you couldn’t stop laughing. 
Don't laugh at me, don't call me names Don't get your pleasure from my pain
“Oh, I’m sorry,” you said mockingly, looking at the empty passenger seat, guessing that that’s where your invisible friend was sitting. “Your pain? I’m not the one who is able to puff wherever and whenever their heart desires and who sneaks up on innocent people.”
Silence. 
“For what it’s worth. I’m sorry. I really am. It’s not like you choose this life, you deserved better than this. But I��m really glad I was able to get to know you. I’m really thankful for the light and happiness you brought back into Julie’s life.”
Don't you worry 'bout a thing
But I'm still learnin' to
using technology
You laughed. “Impressive skills nevertheless. Knowing three fitting songs and then changing them at the right time? Let me guess, Luke? Because I don’t think all of you three would fit into my tiny car full of musical equipment.”
At first, there was no music yet again, but then the slow melody of a (for you) well-known song flooded your car. It was the one Trevor Wilson song you never understood until you met the boys, the one song that was so totally different to his usual rock sound (except for the refrains, which, as you later would find out, were parts of the original lyrics Luke wrote for his version of the song).
I sing to remember the stories that used to be But I don’t write to create what could have been And as I scream words into the darkness around me They come out like a dying whisper
The kindest thing to do is to silence them and let them die To unleash my heartfelt sorrow into the sky  And diminish the will to fight That pulses like fire and screams with pain through my veins
But life’s not always beautiful, it’s rare So I’mma chase it, watch you make it
Don’t need to introduce himself You will want to know his name Pushing your foundations down  He is here to stay
Don’t call him a breeze when he’s a hurricane Don’t call him a tremble when he’s an earthquake Don’t call him an inconvenience Please just say his name
Leaving lyrics in my hands That I swallow like pills Like hurtful words, they rip and claw And press painfully against my chest
But no matter how painful they are I will soak them up, thinking of our hopes and wishes And as each word pushes a new pulse through my veins I keep staring out on the grave of our shared space of mind
Life’s not always beautiful, but it’s rare So I’mma chase it, watch you make it
Don’t need to introduce himself You will want to know his name Pushing your foundations down  He is here to stay
Don’t call him a spark when he’s a lightning bolt Don’t call him a flicker when he’s a raging flame Don’t you dare to underestimate him Please just say his name
But even when the word flood finally comes to an end Fidgeting hands remind me of music never played
I owe him my voice I owe him my sound
So I give him this time I give him this space To sing it out loud To let him declare And let me be proud
What’s his name? (His name is Luke!) What’s his name? (His name is Luke!) What’s his name? (His name is Luke!)
How long do we say his name? (Until we explode!)
My name is Luke! (Tell your friends!)
Tears were rolling down your cheeks, the song now more emotional than ever before. You couldn’t imagine how this song must affect Luke. Thinking that his bandmate abandoned him (which honestly… he kind of did, only mentioning him in one song, not giving any money to their parents and so on) up until he heard the song for the first time.
“Luke…”
Forget about it Let's forget about it
The ensuing silence wasn’t awkward. You hummed along to the music Luke selected, sometimes it were old classics (probably his favourites), other times it seemed to be random newer hits he probably never heard before mixed with some songs from your favourite playlists.
It was nearing midday and your stomach made itself known. As if on cue a road sign hinted at a diner just up ahead. Setting the blinker you pulled into the parking lot a few moments later.
“I hope you don’t mind. I know home’s only like an hour away, but...” you began to trail off, not knowing where to look at and your stomach finished your sentence. And before you were able to grab the door handle it sprung wide open. 
“Uh, what a gentleman. Thank you very much.”
The meal was over in a flash and once more you realised how much the boys actually knew about you without having actually interacted with you (perks of seeing other people without being seen themselves?). 
It’s like Luke could read your wishes just from your facial expressions. Whenever you needed salt or pepper they were right there. Whenever something was too salty or had too much pepper on your drink was being pushed closer to your side. And when you accidentally spilt something and needed more napkins they magically appeared.
When you then spotted a cute little guitar keychain that reminded you of Luke that was being sold as a souvenir at the check-out it was suddenly safely tucked into your back pocket (though that was really really risky, and while you did not condone it you couldn’t really stop a ghost).
Back in your car, you didn’t even bother to turn on the stereo, knowing that Luke would take over as soon as your hands were on the steering wheel again. 
However, a glance to your right presented you with a map of your surroundings, a big x hastily drawn over the Silverwood Lake in San Bernardino, which was basically just around the corner.
“You want to go swimming? We- I just ate! And my bathing suit is somewhere under that mountain of equipment on the backseat.”
Let's just get naked, just for a laugh Let's just get naked It's a trip and a half
You laughed at that, rolling your eyes and shaking your head, before stowing the map away and turning on the car. “I guess catching Reggie in the shower isn’t enough anymore?”
Hey!
“You started making it weird buddy.”
It had started to rain when you finally pulled up in your driveway, but you couldn’t be bothered to rush inside, enjoying the feeling of the cooling wetness on your skin.
“Look at that,” you said to nobody in particular, not knowing if Luke was still around or if he puffed back to the garage, “I didn’t even need to go swimming after all.”
He was. Sitting in the passenger seat, face on his arms while he leaned on the open car window, he watched you dance in the rain with a smile on his face. He was glad he decided to stick around and keep you company on that road trip. You gave him the courage to listen to My Name Is Luke for the first time (and getting to see you smile while showing off his impressive music knowledge was a bonus too). Because without knowing, you were doing little deeds for the boys too.
And made ALEX…
Whoever wrote that “Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass. It's about learning how to dance in the rain”-quote totally forgot to mention how dangerous small summer storms can be. 
Well sure, it might have been your fault for staying out for too long and deciding to let the sun that came out a little bit later dry you instead of changing into fresh and dry clothes, but whatever happened happened and you got sick. (It’s not like you had anything better to do during the last few days of your summer holidays, right?) 
Flynn had been a great friend and hung out almost daily at your house, playing board games, watching movies or tv or even just discussing upcoming Julie and The Phantoms possibilities with you. But your dearest little helper had been Alex.
The blond drummer had turned into the tall brother you never had but always wanted (focus on tall because the age thing with ghosts is seriously confusing) even if he was invisible to you 100% of the time. You had the same interests and were able to bond without actually having to say any words, little gestures and reciprocations on your side were more than enough.
Julie had come up with an easy solution and had bought you some of those sound buzzers (like the ones that dogs and cats use to communicate with their owners) and recorded some simple words and phrases the boys liked to use on them. Now the boys just had to press them to be able to communicate with you without having to use pen and paper or Julie herself (sure your parents were a little bit weary and confused, but you said it was for a longer school research project and that shut them up).
Now, feeling way better than during the last few days, but still very tired, you were sitting in your bed, not really focused on the tv show (or was it a movie?) that was playing on your computer. You had been contemplating and mentally preparing yourself to get something to eat and to drink for the past 15 minutes, but the thoughts alone were exhausting and binding you to the bed. Just then a tray with a water bottle, meds and a fruit bowl floated into your room. 
Suddenly wide awake and full of energy you clumsily jumped out of your bed and grabbed the tray, throwing a quick glance out of the door to see if your parents were around and slammed the door shut, wincing at the loud sound and hoping that Alex had walked out of the way (not that it would have hurt him, but you know - rude).
“Rude.” 
See? He thought the same. (Julie had to specifically add this word for Alex.) 
“I know, I know. I’m sorry. But I would like not to get murdered or have Sam and Dean Winchester on my back because my parents think I’m possessed and need to be exorcised.”
“Me.”
“You what?”
“Me.”
“Alex… I need more context.”
“I do. Me.”
You just blinked blankly at the sound buzzers, trying to piece together what Alex was trying to say.
“Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. M-”
“THAT’S ENOUGH Y/N! WHATEVER THAT SCHOOL PROJECT IS, TELL IT I HEARD IT AND I DON’T CARE WHAT IT WANTS!” you heard your father's scream come muffled through the door.
The audience laughter from sitcoms filled your room and you groaned, grabbing a pillow and smashing it against your face.
Faintly you heard the telltale sound of a pen scribbling something on paper and when you peeked from behind the pillow a note was floating in the air in front of you. “You mean exorcise ME! You would be the one surviving!” 
“What? Oh my god… yeah okay, YOU get exorcised… same thing. Both aren’t allowed to happen. Forgive my fever brain.”
“No.”
“Fork you, Alex.”
“No.”
“I have Carlos on speed-dial, I’m sure he already came up with other methods to get rid of ghosts other than the salt thing. He already told me that he’s sorry and that he thinks I might get haunted by you too with the amount of time I spend at their house.” 
“No. Food.”
Confused at that topic change it took you a few seconds to answer. “What?” Looking around your gaze landed on the tray that you had deposited on your desk. “Oh right! Boy, I completely forgot how thirsty and hungry I am. Did I say thank you? Fang u!” you mumbled with your mouth full of fruit. 
“No. Food.”
You swallowed down your food and took a big gulp of water. “Yes Alex, thank you. I am eating. You see? Here I am, here’s the food. The food is here and now whoops - ifs gan!”
You could basically feel the annoyance radiating from the ghost and weren’t really shocked when the pen started to scribble something down again.
“No! Argh!” He really wrote Argh… that dork really wrote Argh! “You can be worse than Reggie sometimes, but you do it on purpose and I’m just sorry for Reggie. A) Carlos thinks he got rid of us by making a french dip and B) You’re awfully lively for a supposedly sick person. I might need to use the buzzers more and see what other reactions I can provoke from your parents.”
Crumbling the note in your hands you thought ‘Challenge accepted’. “You know what? I think I’mma go back on Reggie’s offer and actually let him introduce me to Wilbur. He might know some stuff I could use to blackmail you. And you’re right! I feel much better, just very tired, but that’s nothing a little bit of fresh air can’t fix! Toodles!” 
You left your room, leaving a flabbergasted ghost behind who had lost his snapback with the number of times he had been combing through his hair with his hands. And while angrily pressing a pink buzzer, the buzzer wasn't the only thing that screamed “WILLIAM!” after the girl. (That was another important sound Alex wanted to have recorded.)
.•´¯`•..•´¯`•..•´¯`•..•´¯`•..•´¯`•..•´¯`•..•´¯`•..•´¯`•.
Taglist: @sunsetcurvej​​ @ifilwtmfc​
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yukina-otome · 4 years ago
Text
Ikevamp pregnancy and family headcanon pt.1
So I don’t usually write headcanons. English is only my 3rd language so I make a lot of mistakes. But these days I work at the Maternity hospital and I got those baby vibes so I decided to write this. Please be nice to me. I’m a noob at writing lol. I will illustrate what I think the children would look like with pictures of characters that are NOT MINE. Pls be understanding. If you want a part 2 tell me what other boys you would like in the comments and live me a little encouragement because I have 0 confidence lol.
Part 2 | Part 3
1-Napoleon : 2 sons and 1 daughter 
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-Napoleon always dreamed of a normal peaceful life -That peaceful life of course included you, and kids that would look like you running around. -And so when you first got pregnant Napoleon was beyond happy. -He wanted a little girl that would look exactly like you. -9 months later you gave him the cutest little boy with his dark hair and Turquoise eyes. -The second he laid his eyes on him he adored him. -5 years later napoleon asked if you were ready to have another one. A little girl this time hopefully. -And BOOM 10 months later a little boy was born again with dark slightly blue hair and blue eyes. -Still Napoleon loved him to death and was happy. -The third time you got pregnant was not planned. -You 2nd son was still 2 years old. -But you guys were still very happy. -9 months passed and napoleon was almost sure he'll get a little boy again. -But this time a beautiful baby girl was born with your brown hair and blue almost gray eyes. -Napoleon couldn't have been any happier. -He loved and cherished all his children equally. -His first born was calm and cool but very sensitive. He loved reading and studying. He spent a lot of time with uncle Isaac who taught him everything from math to physics to Latin. -The second born was more like Napoleon. He trained with his father and uncle jean as soon as he could walk. He loved his mother a lot and vowed to protect her from bad guys ("like uncle Arthur who always flirts with mama"). -The third born looked a lot like you but her personality was just like napoleon. She had charisma and everyone was in awe in front of her. she usually went on horse rides with her father. -The family would usually cook crepes together on Sunday and all of napoleon children still had to learn how to defend themselves. -He's very open minded and forging but very strict when it comes to their safety.
2-Mozart :  2 daughters (Twins)
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-Mozart never thought about having children. -But being with you opened many new horizons in his life and he started thinking about what it would be like having a family with you. -So when one day you told him you were pregnant, he froze for 1 min before scooping you in his arms. -You've never seen Mozart smile wider. -When you were in your fifth month Arthur told you that you seemed bigger than most pregnant woman at that stage. -You wondered if he was right and visited your doctor the next day. -After some examination your doctor told you you were most likely pregnant with twins. She started explaining about the risks that could have. -When you told Wolf about it he was horrified. The thought of loosing you was unbearable. -But you told him you wanted this and that you would fight for your life and the life of your babies no matter what. You also made him promise to treasure and take care of your babies no matter what happens. -Your labor started early. In the 7th month to be precise and after few hours of fear and anxiety the doctor told Mozart that you gave birth to two beautiful girls and that both the babies and you were okay. -Of course the twins were very small and needed extra care but thankfully everything went well. -When you finally brought them to the mansion all the guys went crazy over them. -The first twin was the spitting image of Mozart with white hair and purple eyes. She was calm and cold looking but inside she was a big softie. Of course you guys named her Violet. -The second twin had your brown hair and her father violet eyes and she reminded you of a sunflower. She was cheerful and a bit clumsy. Theo loved her a lot because she reminded him of Vincent. Her name was Sonnen (solar in German) and Mozart always called her my Sonnenblume (means my sunflower). -Both the twins would learn piano from their father but Violet liked it more. Sonnen preferred to go out and play with king and uncle Theo -You would spend hours cooking with Sonnen who always had crazy ideas like marmalade butter beef cookies. (thankfully you would stop her). When you guys finished you went in the piano room where violet and Mozart were playing piano and invite them to eat. -You would all eat in the dinning room though because of the "No food in our piano room" rule.
3-Leonardo : 1 daughter (warning mention of character death)
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-Leonardo didn't want kids at first. -He always thought about how you would feel if you saw yourself growing old while your child would stop growing out. -He also didn't want to see his child suffer the same way he did and would again eventually. -And so when one day you told him nervously you were pregnant he grew silent. You knew he needed some time to think it over so you gave him some space.  -Few days passed and Leo still kept silent. He was in his thought most of the time and le compte felt something was wrong with his friend. -When Leo told le compte, le compte frowned and told him that both of you need to have a conversation and that he cant stay silent for the rest of his life. -That night Leo knocked at your door and told you about his fears. You smiled at him and told him that you would never regret giving birth to his child. -"I know a day would come when i will have to leave you, that makes me very sad but what sadden me even more is imagining you alone after i leave. I want to leave you someone who can share your pain and happiness for eternity. Someone to remind you of me, of us." -After that Leo relaxed and as months pass the fear is replaced by excitement. He starts reading tons of books about pregnancies and child raising and his room becomes even more of a mess. -But one day after you tripped on a pile of books and almost fell leo decided that he would keep his room clean of all time. The next day when you entered his room and saw how tidy it is you got into shock. -Anyways few months later you give birth to a beautiful baby girl. Of course as Leo expected the baby was a true blood. -She had light brown hair and yellow eyes identical to his. -She was cute and sweet and at the same time had a fierce aura. She shared her father interests and always sat to read with him books that were way beyond her age. -She loved swords, fighting and sports. -She loved her uncle le compte the most and he always bought her all kind of dresses. -But one day she told him she didn't want any more dress cause she was going to wear pants from now on. -She was a tomboy and loved going to the pub with her uncle Arthur and Theo and start fights (once she was old enough of course) -She became her father best companion and even hundreds of years later he never felt alone ever again because she was always by his side even after you left them both.
4-Arthur: 2 daughters and 1 son
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-Arthur knew you were pregnant way before you even noticed that you were late on your period. -He was not surprised because you two would go at it like bunnies every night so it was bound to happen. -He always dreamed and what it was to have a family with you but at the same time he was terrified. His past and trauma coming to haunt him again. -Outside he seemed fine but you knew better. You spent long nights reassuring him that everything was going to be okay. -He was feeling better but still needed your reassurance from time to time. -As the 9th month got closer he became incredibly overprotective. He stuck to your side at all time and got his old medical books out to study again Obstetrics and pediatrics. -He was ready. Or so he thought. -But when the time came he was an absolute mess of panic. It took Theo to give him a good punch on the face for him to get his s**t together. -DOCTOR MODE ACTIVATED. -Thankfully everything went smoothly and a baby girl with black hair and huge blue eyes was born. -He knew that moment he would never be the same ever again. -OVERPROTECTIVE PAPA MODE ACTIVATED. -He never let any man approach her (even the 2 year old who wanted to play with her in the park) -"All men are wolves my darling" he would say as his 1 year old daughter looked at him with he big blue eyes. -Eventually you got pregnant again (Again Arthur was not surprised). -But this time Arthur was a lot more calm. -A beautiful baby girl was born again with smaller blue eyes and brown hair. -She looked like a mini you but with Arthur's eyes. -Arthur wanted to name her Victoria but dropped the idea because he thought it would be confusing (because of Vic). -The two girls loved spending time with uncle Vincent and Theo -The first born favorite hobby was teasing her uncle Isaac as soon as she was old enough to talk. -"As expected of my daughter" Arthur would say as he rolls on the floor laughing. -She shared her father sharp instincts and would help him solve the cases in the city. -The second daughter was much more calm and gentle. Just like her mother. She loved her father stories but not Sherlock Holmes. Her favorite book was "The Coming  of the Fairies" -She had an almost obsession with fairies and supernatural beings. - When your daughter were both 10 and 12 years old you accidentally got pregnant again (If You think two daughters would stop Arthur you are very wrong). -This time it was the cutest baby boy with curly black hair and big blue eyes. -Your baby boy was a huge crybaby and was always stuck to his mother. He was delicate and sensitive. He cared about others well being more than anything and he dreamed of being a doctor. -When he told Arthur he was absolutely against it. He didn't want his son to go through the pain he had to endure. But as your son grew up he became less of a crybaby while still being sensitive and delicate. He showed great talent in the medical field. -"Arthur, you were alone but our son is not alone. He got us and his sisters to hug him and wipe his tears when he'll need a break. Let's support him together." you told Arthur one night and eventually his father accepted to let him live his dream.
I only did the 4 first suitors but if u want any of the others pls do tell me in the comments. I’ll make a part 2. Also since this is my very first headcanon pls tell me what u think. Don’t be too mean pls.
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13-reasons-ideas · 4 years ago
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So I have this idea, You know how people want/like things they can’t have, MontyxOC have always had this friendship that bordered on something more but it never got there. She gets a boyfriend, Monty starts avoiding her majorly & their friendship crumbles until one night he shows up at her door & lays his cards out, they have a heated argument but then it turned into into something else quite heated😘 and as bad as it was that she cheated she doesn’t regret it, he’s all she’s ever wanted anyway
Why Didn’t You Say Anything? 
A/N: contains SMUT. DNI if under 18. 18+ ONLY. Trigger warning: rough CONSENSUAL sex. I hope you like this. I’m sorry it took WAY too long to get around to finishing but I was having a lot of issues finding inspiration for requests. I’ve found it again though so expect more to come. As always, I love feedback and much love. - Em
Montgomery and I had been friends since… well since forever. As long as I could remember anyway. He was a quiet kid. Kept to himself for the most part when we were younger. I wouldn’t come to find out why exactly that was until much later on in our friendship. We bonded over a love of the same candy. It sounds stupid thinking back on it now, but at the time we were just kids. We didn’t really know how to have interests yet.
Eventually, as we got older and we developed our things, we found that even though our interests didn’t really match the way people thought they should-I was a novice musician, he was on his way to being a star athlete- we bonded over our passion and drive for our respective things. He would come over to my house and watch me teach myself to play guitar, play piano, or sing. I would meet him in the park and play catch when he discovered a love of baseball. Or when we started middle school and he would try to teach me how to throw a football. That… never went very well. But he was pretty good at catching it regardless as it turned out, so it worked out in the end.
Our friendship started to change around middle school too. It wasn’t noticeable at first. He started spending more and more time at my place. By then I had learned what his father was like behind closed doors. That had been an interesting phone call to my mom to come get me. Our conversations became even longer and more personal. We talked about our hopes and dreams. Where we wanted to end up when we were finally adults. The running thing was that no matter what we wanted to be when we grew up that week, we were always staples in each other’s futures. I started to seek him out at lunch more. I felt this desire to be near him that I couldn’t explain. Or maybe I could, and I just didn’t want to, for fear of being rejected and losing my best friend.
In high school, when we made different friends and traveled in different circles, we were still best friends. We had always been basically inseparable. Montgomery and Juliette. Julie and Monty. Where you saw one of us, you usually found the other. I waited for him after football and baseball tryouts and my dad made waffles for dinner when he made the team. There was a seat basically reserved for me at games since freshman year. I only missed two games in three and a half years. Once when I had strep throat in sophomore year and once when my uncle died last year. Monty didn’t want to go to that week’s game. I told him if he didn’t, I would never play piano for him again. For his part, Monty sat through countless hours of me learning songs or listening to tons of voice memos while I was writing my own. He was at every one of my gigs, no matter how big or small. It didn’t matter if there was ten people or a hundred people, he was always there, sitting in the first or second row. Even Bryce Walker couldn’t come between us.
I couldn’t help but feel like there was something more than friendship between us. I was still too afraid of rejection to say anything and he never said anything either. Other people had always made comments about our friendship and how close we were. But we both just laughed it off and attributed it to people not understanding that guys and girls could just be friends. When we were in junior year and it became clear to me that the feelings I had ignored and buried for so long, weren’t reciprocated, I decided it was time to move on. There was no point in pining after someone who didn’t want me back. And as luck would have it, the perfect person to get my mind off of my best friend had just moved to town and was assigned as my chemistry lab partner.
Parker Johnston was an average height, thin but lean, young man from Ohio. He had shaggy blond hair and cobalt blue eyes. He came from a stable, well off family, but he wasn’t a show-off about it. His parents were mortgage brokers who wanted to work in, but not live in the city. Essentially, he was everything Montgomery de la Cruz… wasn’t. He did still like sports though. They have that to bond over. I thought after my first conversation with him after chemistry. I invited him to have lunch with us. The guys on the football team liked him. Even Monty was nice to him. Though, at that point, none of us knew what would become of Parker and I hanging out.
**
“I don’t know Monty. We are just going for burgers at Rosie’s. It’s not like I’m going to marry the guy.” I was on the phone with Monty while I got ready for my first date with Parker. We had been hanging out as friends for seven months or so. Over the summer, we had connected more and found we had more than just a mutual dislike of our chemistry teacher in common.
“Well, what do you think will happen?”
“On our date? Or are you asking if I’ve thought far enough ahead to actually consider if we are getting married? Because I haven’t thought further ahead than my math test next Friday.”
“On your date.”
“I think I will have my usual cheeseburger with pink lemonade, and we will talk. Maybe split a milkshake for dessert. Green or grey shirt?”
“Is it the green with polka dots?”
“No, the plain army green one.”
“Grey. The green one gives you too much cleavage. A cheeseburger and lemonade? That’s it?”  
“He’s seen me in the green one before, and no it doesn’t, but whatever. Yes Monty. That’s it. Why do you care so much, anyway?”
“I don’t. Just want to know what you’re planning. Make sure you’re safe.” I rolled my eyes.
“Well, I appreciate your concern.”
“Anytime. Are you coming to the game on Friday? It’s our second home game. First game of October. You know how you love fall games.”
“Of course, I’m coming. It’s not like I have a choice anymore, you guys are stuck with me.” I joked.
“Haha very funny Julie.”
“I try. Hey, listen. I gotta go. Parker will be here soon. I’ll call you when I get home.”
Our first date was going great. We had been to Rosie’s before together, but it was different now that we were on a date. We were there for hours, just sitting and talking to each other. Monty texted me around eight, just to check in. You still out or do I need to call the cops?
I’m still here. All good. He left me on read. I assumed it was because I was still out. “Everything okay?” Parker asked when he got back from the bathroom.
“Oh, yeah. Just Monty checking in.”
“Fair, fair. I guess that’s my cue to take you home for the night?”
“I suppose so.” Even though we had verbalized the need to leave, neither of us moved to leave.
“One more order of fries?”
“Yes.” After our last order, Parker drove me home and I called Monty to spill all the details as I got ready for bed.
The following Friday, Parker and I went to the game together. It was the first time we were going together just the two of us, and not with a group of friends.  As far as high school football games go, this one was pretty standard. We held hands through most of it. Bryce’s parents were out of town again, so he was having a “we lost but I have money so let’s all get wasted” party. “I’ll meet you in the parking lot? Or did you want to just meet at Bryce’s place? I have to go talk to Monty.”
“We can meet at his place if you want.” He looked confused.
“It’s tradition. I always wait for him. I have since freshman year.”
“Oh, okay then. I’ll see you at Bryce’s place Jules.” He kissed me. I smiled into it before pulling away. I watched him turn and walk down the bleacher steps and turn towards the parking lot before running off to find Monty.
I spotted him talking to Luke and Scott. His back was turned to me. They saw me coming but didn’t react. They know me so well now. They know exactly what is coming. I smiled playfully before wrapping my arms around Monty’s waist tightly. He laughed and pried my hands off of him, before turning around and lifting me up in a hug. I didn’t even complain about the sweat. “You know that doesn’t surprise me anymore Julie.”
“I know. But it’s fun.” He was still holding me. “Are you going to like… put me down at some point?”
He turned back around to face Luke and Scott. They were shaking their heads, grinning. “Nah.” He decided.
“Well. I don’t need to see inside the boy’s locker room so you put me down outside.”
“What, you mean you don’t want to see a whole lot of Brycey’s pasty white ass?” Luke teased.
“No. No I do not. Every day I don’t see that is a good day for me. And since you are hell bent on carrying me, can I at least be comfortable? My legs are just dangling here.” Monty stopped walking so I could wrap my legs around his waist like a backwards piggyback ride. His hands went under my thighs to support my weight.
Thankfully, he put me down outside the boy’s locker room. I played around on my phone while I waited for him. “You know, I smell like sweat now.” I said when he came out, freshly showered and changed. He shook his head and smirked.
“I don’t see that as a bad thing.”
“Dude. I smell like your sweat.” He rolled his eyes and stopped to dig around in his bag. He pulled out one of my t-shirts. It was a little wrinkled but still presentable. I took it when he handed it to me. “Thank you. I’ve been looking for this. How long have you had it?”
“A while.” He shrugged. I ran into the girl’s room to change. I handed him my other shirt.
“Since it’s your sweat, you can wash it.”
“You know, you never used to complain about smelling like sweat after a game.”
“Well, I didn’t have a boyfriend who would care then.”
“Juliette, you didn’t have boyfriend period.”
“You say like you’ve had a girlfriend.”
“Oh, shut up.” He pushed me playfully.
“You know. How the hell did we get to our senior year of high school and neither one of us has actually dated anyone? Tyler Down has been on dates.”
“You’ve been on dates before.”
“Yeah. but it was never anything worth getting past the end of date three. And I wouldn’t call what happens in bedrooms or bathrooms at parties, dating. You’ve been on dates too.”
“I mean, sure. But they weren’t serious.” We had made it to the parking lot now. “I’ll see you at Bryce’s?”
“Yeah. I’m meeting Parker there.”
“Awesome.” I hugged him again before sprinting to my car.
The party was in full swing by the time I arrived. I had run to Walplex to grab a bottle of Advil on the way. Monty’s Jeep was parked out front and I spotted Parker’s Ram was parked up the road a little ways. I parked in an open spot and made my way past the people milling in the front. “Julie!” Bryce called, raising his beer in my direction.
“Bryce!”
“Hey Monty, your girl is here.”
“Not my girl Bryce.” Monty laughed as he handed me a drink.
“How many has he had already?” I whispered.
“Two.” I blinked slowly.
“So, is this Bryce in a good mood?”
“Yup.”
“Huh.”
“Hey Jules.” Parker snaked his arms around my waist and kissed my head. “Hey Monty.”
“Hey. Parker.”
“Oh, shit you’re right. She’s his girl now.”
“Fuck off Bryce.” I teased. Monty was looking at Parker and I with his brow furrowed. I mouthed later to him.
The three of us moved through the party easily. Monty and Parker talked about the game. I tuned them out. I was too busy watching them. It was nice to see my boyfriend and my best friend getting along so well. Maybe that was why I never dated much before. I was scared they wouldn’t get along. Soon enough, Scott pulled Parker away to chat. “Go ahead. I’m good here with Monty.”
“You sure?” I nodded, placing my hand on his arm.
“Just don’t steal him for too long Reed.” I kissed him on the cheek. Scott nodded. When they were out of earshot, Monty spoke.
“You didn’t tell him you hate being called Jules?”
“It’s cute when he does it.”
“Julie. I saw your face when he said it. Your eye twitched.”
“Muscle spasm.”
“Mhmm. Sure.” I caught Scott’s eye from across the room. He nodded slightly to me. I took that to mean I should hear what they were talking about.
“Oh, would you look at that. My cup is empty. Time for another drink. Refill?” I took his cup anyway and he followed me into the kitchen.
While I was refilling our cups, Monty’s with beer and mine with a Crown and Sprite, I listened in on their conversation. Monty tried to hide it but I knew he was listening too. We whispered nothings to each other to make it seem like we weren’t eavesdropping. “So what exactly is their relationship then?” Parker asked. He’s asking about me and Monty.
“They’ve been best friends for as long as anyone can remember. There isn’t anything more to it.”
“They seem to spend a lot of time together.”
“Like I said, they’re best friends. And I don’t think I’m the person you need to be having this discussion with.”
“You know them best. Do I need to be concerned?”
“What? No, of course not. Look. She’s never really dated anyone before. It’s always just been the two of them. You have been seeing Julie for a week officially. It’s going to take some time for that relationship to change. Just leave it alone for now. And Monty is a good guy. He’s an asshole. But he’s a good guy. If he wanted to make a move, he wouldn’t do it now. Not knowing that she is in a relationship. You really should talk to Julie about this though.”
“I will. I just wanted to get a little bit of insight from someone else first. Thanks man.”
“No problem.”
Parker did that guy handshake thing with Scott and started walking in our direction. My eyes widened. Monty just smirked and mouthed math test to me.
“Anyway, yeah. That math test was totally brutal.”
“I’m sure you did great.”
“I’m literally eighty percent sure I failed. Mind you, so is everyone else.”
“I have it on Monday so thanks for the heads up. Oh, hey Parker.”
“Hey guys. What’s on Monday?”
“Math test that ruined my entire class.”
“Damn.” I put my arm around Parker’s waist and leaned into him.
Monty was scanning the room. To Parker, he was just looking at the crowd. But I was familiar with that look. He was on the hunt. I pulled Parker away discreetly so we could be alone and he could seem available. Monty nodded and smirked at us. Fuck off you little shit. I stuck my tongue out at him and Parker rolled his eyes. We managed to find a quiet corner that was unoccupied. “So, your drink is Crown and Sprite. You hate math. You don’t like chemistry. You like extra lettuce on your cheeseburger. We’ve been friends for months and I never really noticed any of that.”
“You like vodka in your iced tea. But your drink is whisky and Coke. You hate history. You also don’t like chemistry. You get tomatoes on the side of your burgers. I think you knew all of that about me. It just didn’t matter before.”
“That makes sense.” I laid my head on his shoulder and we sat together like that for a while. We were still getting used to the change in our relationship.
I looked up from my lap and caught Monty’s eye across the room. He had a girl in his sights. I nodded to him. He smiled, thinking no one else would see. The smile he reserved for me. Before he went to talk to whatever girl he would have under his spell and realistically, him in less than twenty minutes, he came over to us. “I’m probably going to be busy for the rest of the night, so will you make sure she gets home okay?”
“Yeah. No problem.” Monty turned to me and gave me a pleading look.
“Dude. Again? Seriously?”
“I didn’t have time to stop on the way over.” He shrugged, acting innocent.
“One of these days I won’t be here. Or I’ll leave my wallet at home. Or I won’t be carrying. What are you going to do then?”
“That isn’t a right now problem. Now do you, or don’t you?”
“I do. Calm down.” I reached into my pocket and pulled out my wallet. Parker was watching our interaction with a puzzled look on his face. I pulled out the square silver packet and handed it to him. Monty accepted it gratefully.
“Thank you. You are a life saver.”
“Don’t do anything you’ll regret in the morning, Montgomery.”
“Never do, Juliette.”
“And don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”
“I make no promises.” I sighed deeply. Of course, you don’t. Monty waved at us again and ran off to go make a move on whatever girl it was this time.
I looked at Parker and he was staring at me with wide eyes. “What?”
“You carry condoms around for him?”
“No. I carry them around for me. And if he needs one, then I give it to him.”
“But why?”
“I’m not sure if you’ve noticed, but he’s kind of a whore. He is my best friend, but the man is a whore. I’d rather give him a condom than take him to get tested or become a cool aunt. I’m too young for that.”
“What if you needed it?”
“Will I need it? Because I wasn’t exactly planning on needing it.”
“I don’t know. You never know.”
“Well, if that’s the case, I have a whole box at home anyway. I don’t plan on using any tonight though.”
“I wasn’t either.”
“If it makes you feel better, I can start carrying two. Also, I put a fresh one in my wallet every morning so it’s not like they’re sitting.” He only nodded in understanding. Monty was right. I didn’t see him for the rest of the night. He texted me later that he was crashing at Bryce’s.
A few weeks after that party, things with Monty and I were the same as they always were. Parker never brought up his conversation with Scott. I attributed it to seeing us around each other and Parker being comfortable with the status of our relationship. We were getting home from a coffee date. “My parents are working late if you want to come inside. My mom has a double at the hospital.”
“Sure.” He slipped his hand in my back pocket when I was unlocking the door. I blushed. Inside, I dropped my purse on the kitchen counter. He draped his coat over a chair and sat down. I was digging through the cabinets for a snack when he surprised me with a question.
“What’s going on with you and Monty?”
“Uh.” I paused because he caught me off guard. “What do you mean?”
“It’s just how you guys act with each other. I never noticed it before. Or I did and thought it would stop after we got together.”
“I don’t understand the question?”
“Do I need to be concerned about your relationship with him, Juliette?”
“No. Not at all. Monty is the last person you need to concern yourself with. It’s never been like that with us.”
“So, you just flirt with each other and finish each other’s sentences for no reason?”
“Okay, first of all, we do not flirt with each other. Second of all, we have been best friends since we were in elementary. Which means we know things about each other.” I was walking back to the table with a bowl of M&Ms. Placing it on the table, I sat in his lap gently. He wrapped his arms around me.
“You carry condoms around in your wallet and give him one whenever he wants.”
“I already told you why I carry them Parker.” I rested my head on his shoulder.
“You’re sure there’s never been anything between you guys?” Nothing reciprocated.
“I promise there has never anything between us. He really isn’t a concern that way Parker.” I kissed his neck softly. It was barely a brush of my lips against his skin.
“Do you still have that box?”
“Mhmmm.” He stood me up and grasped my hand.
“Lead the way Jules.”
The next day, I woke up alone. Parker had snuck out after a little bit of cuddling, so my parents didn’t find him here. I stared up at my ceiling for a few minutes. It was different with him. It means something. Maybe that’s what I needed to get Monty out of my system. Maybe it had to mean something. I groaned when my alarm went off again. Reluctantly, I got up and got ready to go to school. My dad had already left for work again. I texted Parker and Monty before I left. Stopping for coffee if you want anything.
Parker answered first. I’m good, thanks though babe.
Monty answered a few minutes later. Since you offered, my usual?
Gotcha. See you at school.
Coffees in hand, I pulled up to school. Parker was waiting for me just outside the parking lot. “Hey you.” He kissed me. We were walking to my locker when he saw the second coffee, he continued, “I said I didn’t want anything.”
“Oh. This isn’t for you. It’s for Monty.”
“Ah, yes.”
“We talked about this last night Park.”
“I know. That’s not all we did last night.” He muttered, leaning in to kiss my neck.
“Yeah. Last night was pretty great.” I smiled.
“What about last night?” Monty asked, scaring me a little.
“Jesus Monty. I need to buy you a bell or something. Why do you have to be the only guy at this school whose shoes don’t squeak?” I turned and stuck out his coffee.
“Parker’s don’t squeak.” I rolled my eyes. As though he could snese that I wanted to talk to Monty alone, he made a quick exit.
“I’ll catch you at lunch Jules.”
“Okay. Save some cheese for me.” Parker kissed me before walking away.
“So, what about last night?” Monty asked again after Parker left. I was quiet and blushed deeply. “Julie, what happened?”
“Homerun.”
“Shit. Seriously?”
“Yeah. It was good. Nice.”
“That… that’s great.” I didn’t notice the way his smile didn’t reach his eyes or that he stammered.
“I’ll see you at lunch?”
“Uh, yeah. I have a couple of things to do for Coach, but I should be able to make at least a little bit of lunch.”
“Okay.”
I fully expected my relationship with Parker to change after that night. But I never expected that night would cause my relationship with Montgomery change too. It seemed like the closer I got to Parker the more distant Monty became. At first, it was little things. He had stuff to do with the guys or for sports stuff at lunches. Or he had things to do after practice. He wouldn’t stop to talk as long in the halls with me. If his dad was on another tear, I would find out about it the next day at school instead of that night. He brushed it off when I asked him about it. “I don’t want to seem like more of a burden. I have other places I can crash too,” he had said. For some reason, I believed him. I didn’t think anything of it. It wasn’t the first time he had taken a break from always coming to my place. I didn’t think it would be the last time.
But then, as the days and weeks passed, our relationship became even more strained. He had stopped waiting for me after games. He had all but stopped talking to me at school. My texts were left on read for hours, whereas before, he would answer me within minutes. What had initially been dubbed a ‘break’ from seeking refuge at my house, had become a full out ending. One Monday, when I got to school his cheek was stitched closed. I stopped dead in my tracks and covered my mouth in shock. Upon closer inspection when I passed, it looked like it was stitched with sewing thread. Why didn’t he come to me? He knows my mom keeps a suture kit in the first aid kit. He all but looked through me when he caught me looking. If he saw me coming now, he walked in the other direction. For the first time, my best friend was literally all out ignoring me. I didn’t know what to do. So, I tried to do the same. If he wants to ignore me, then two can play at that game. We pretended the other person didn’t exist.
“Hey, are you okay?” Parker asked me when we were sitting on the couch watching tv.
“Yeah.” I was scrolling through my phone.
“You haven’t looked up from your phone for an entire episode.”
“Huh? Has it been that long?”
“Yes. What are you looking at?” I was scrolling through my texts with Montgomery. The last time we had texted each other was three weeks ago. Before then, the last time we went longer than two days not texting each other was when I was at summer camp and we weren’t allowed to have our phones for a week. I couldn’t figure out what I had done wrong or what made our relationship change. Parker took my phone from me and closed out of messages when he saw what I was looking at. “If he doesn’t want to talk to you because you have a boyfriend, that’s his problem.”
“That’s not why Parker.”
“How do you know?”
“He wouldn’t do that.” Would he?
“How do you know he wouldn’t, Jules?”
“We promised each other a long time ago that we wouldn’t be those people.”
“Those people?”
“The people who stopped talking when one of us got into a relationship. We promised.”
“Okay, well if you promised then I’m probably wrong.” He sounded skeptical.
“We promised.” I muttered. Parker pulled me closer and held me while I tried to focus on our show.
**
I was sitting cross legged on the couch playing I Almost Do on my guitar while I listened to the rain hitting the roof. The old Disney World sweatshirt I was wearing helped me to stay warm, even though the heat was on. As I finished the bridge, there was a knock at the door. I’m not expecting anyone. Maybe its Parker swinging by to keep me company. I set my guitar down on the coffee table and went to answer the door when there was another, more impatient knock. “I’m coming, keep your pants on.” I muttered under my breath. Yanking open the door I felt my jaw hit the floor. “Monty.” I breathed. He was soaked. His hair fell on his forehead and I could tell the flannel he wore was soaked through.
“Hey.” Was all he said. I blinked at him slowly. “Can I come in?”
“Uh, yeah. Yeah come in.” I said, moving out of the way while I tried to figure out what he was doing here. “Did you like… walk here or something?”
“Would you believe me if I said no?”
“No. Trust you not to wear a jacket in the pouring rain though.” He didn’t respond. He just looked around the living room. Okay. This isn’t weird and awkward at all. “What are you doing here Montgomery?”
“I thought about what I wanted to say to you the whole way here. And now that I’m here….”
“What are you talking about?”
“I have some stuff I need to say to you Julie.”
“Oh okay. Now you want to talk to me. Right.” I crossed my arms.
“Can you just let me say what I need to say?”
“Why? I mean, you’ve been avoiding me like the fucking plague for weeks Montgomery. Why should I listen to what you have to say?”
“Because it’s important Juliette.”
“Fine. Speak.” This better be good.
“I don’t know how to say this. I literally had this all planned out in my head on the way here.” He began. I remained silent. “I get that you’re mad at me for avoiding you, but I have reasons for it. And I need you to understand that it hasn’t been easy for me. You’re one of my closest friends.” I let out a dry, unamused laugh. Sure. You just avoid all of your friends. Totally normal behaviour for you. Monty sighed before continuing, “I couldn’t sit around and watch you with Parker. I tried. Believe me. I fucking tried. I tried being happy for you and I tried being friends with him. I tried to ignore everything in me that was screaming to just walk away. But I couldn’t do it anymore. I needed to walk away for both of our sakes. It wasn’t fair to you for me to be half out of our friendship and it wasn’t fair to me to have to keep everything in. It wasn’t healthy.”
“So, you couldn’t be friends with me, or say anything about why you were suddenly shutting me out, because I have a boyfriend? That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard you say. And we promised we wouldn’t be those people.”
“Oh, for fucks-. No Juliette. I couldn’t be friends with you because I’ve been in love with you for four years.”
My eyes widened at his revelation and I felt the colour drain from my face. What? I couldn’t think of anything else to do except laugh. “Yeah, sure you are Monty. That’s rich.”
“You think I would joke about that? You know me Julie.”
“No. I think if you did love me, you would have had the balls to fucking say something about it before I got into a relationship. Or at the very least, to not act like a fuckin’ child when I did get into a relationship.”
“When exactly would I have told you? Somewhere between when you were worrying about your friends and when you were pining after Parker?”
“Yes. Parker and I were friends with each other for months before we started dating. At any of those times, you could have put on your big boy pants and fucking said something about how you felt.”
“That’s nice that you think that. Do you think I would walk halfway across town in the pouring rain for someone I wasn’t in love with? Seriously Juliette?”
“Maybe.” I replied. I was still angry with him, but he did have a point. “It doesn’t matter. You waited too long. I’m with Parker now.” He scoffed. I hadn’t realized how close he had gotten to me until now.
“Doesn’t matter? Look me in the eye and tell me you don’t feel it. Tell me you don’t feel the fluttering or the warmth when we are together. And then tell me that what you feel with Parker is anything close to that.”
“I-I-I….” I started, trying to meet his hardened gaze.
“You can’t can you?” My silence spoke volumes. “Tell me you don’t want this.” He whispered, as he caressed my cheek. I couldn’t tell him that. And I couldn’t pull away. I couldn’t do anything to stop him. For the first time, I had allowed myself to consider the feelings I had buried down deep for so long. I opened the box in my heart labeled danger, and damn it felt good. I reached up and tapped his arm quickly, twice. Our silent ‘okay’ signal when we couldn’t speak. He immediately kissed me hungrily and backed me against the nearest wall. My hands immediately went to his belt and began to tug at it, in a heated attempt to undo it. He nipped at my lip sharply and I growled lowly from the back of my throat. Giving up on the fickle strip of leather, I began to fight with his still wet shirt. The flannel stuck to the cotton of his t-shirt more and more with every tug. Abandoning the idea of removing them separately, I grabbed the bottom of his shirts together and pulled up harshly. All the while, his lips never left mine. The only time they did was to give me the space to pull off his tops. His eyes had darkened at least two shades as he stood in front of me. I felt my pupils dilate again as I reached out for him. He was on me in seconds. The feeling of him tugging at my sweater, now sightly damp from his clothes, as though I was a prize he couldn’t wait to tear into, stirred something inside of me. The primal aggressiveness and the slow burning, ever present tension of the situation making any consequences of our actions, seem totally irrelevant. He managed to remove my shirt with far fewer struggles than I did and began attacking my neck, leaving wet kisses and stinging nips down one side and then the other. Once again, I tried my hand at undoing his belt again. This time, I was able to. Quickly undoing it, I pulled it through the loops of his dark jeans and went for the button. He placed his hand on mine to stop me. I looked at him questioningly.
“What?” I asked, breathlessly.
“Maybe we shouldn’t do this in your living room.” He said, panting. I nodded in agreement and suddenly, he picked me up and threw me over his shoulder.
“Monty!” I exclaimed, taken by surprise. He merely tightened his grip on my waist as he walked through the house to my room in the basement.
In my dark room, only illuminated by the dim pink-red glow of the salt lamp on my nightstand, he strode towards my bed and dropped me on my back. I reached out to him as he took a step back from the bed. “Get back here.” I demanded. He chuckled and shook his head.
“No. Nuh uh. I’ve waited far too long for this moment.” He smirked, devilishly. I groaned in displeasure at him. His smirk widened.
Deciding it was time to take matters into my own hands again, I sat up and slid off my bed. Taking my place on my knees in front of him, I reached up and undid the button and zipper on his jeans. He made no move to stop me as I dropped to my knees and pulled the denim harshly. They fell in a pool at his feet and I sat back on my heels as I stared at the bulge in his boxers. I growled lowly in the back of my throat and reached for the waistband of his boxers. Pulling them down, I watched his cock spring free and whined unconsciously. My movements were suddenly timid as I reached for it. It wasn’t my first time by any means. But it felt different this time. This time it was with Monty. And you have a boyfriend who isn’t Monty. Oh, shut up and let me enjoy this. I’ll deal with the consequences later. Grasping his thick, heavy cock in my hand, I stroked it softly. This was so wrong, yet it felt so wonderfully right.
My strokes changed as I gained more confidence and was able to push away any intrusive thoughts about Parker. They were faster and I tightened my grip slightly. Montgomery let out a sharp breath when my ring fingernail caught a bit of skin. “Sorry.”
“It’s okay, you’re excited. Just remember we have all night Julie.”
“I know.” His hips started to buck a little bit and my mouth began to water.
“We have plenty of time for that later.” I groaned a little. “Look at me.” I looked up at him through my lashes. “I promise you can after I fuck you into your mattress.” My eyes widened as big as saucers. We went from five to a hundred real quick. Fucking hot though.
Monty took my bicep in his hand to pull me up before pushing me back down on the bed roughly. I gasped in shock. I sat up on my elbows and watched him unbutton and rip open the zipper on my jeans. He pulled them down with a little help from me. He took a very brief second to admire my mint underwear before pulling them off and chucking them across my room. I sat up to undo and remove my pink bralette. A low growl came from deep in his chest when my breasts were out in the open and I was naked. His eyes scanned my body hungrily. My own dark eyes admired his naked body. I grabbed his arm to pull him down towards me.
“There is so much I want to do to you, but it will have to wait until later.” He whispered in my ear, biting at my earlobe. He bit and sucked his way down my neck, easily pulling loud moans out of me. There were sure to be marks all over my neck in the morning. Consequences be damned.
“Later, yes.” I panted. I could feel his hard length against my thigh. I rutted my hips against his. He kissed me passionately. When his hand trailed down my body, I knew his intentions. “No time. Just do it. Need it.” He stilled. The passion and tension were still in the air but there was a slight shift.
“Are you sure? I don’t want to hurt you.”
“Yes. Just be quick about it and it’ll be fine.” I stuck out my pinky. He linked his with mine.
“If you need me to stop and adjust, just say so.”
“I will.” I nodded, trying to edge him along. Just hurry the hell up and do it.
Monty straightened up and pulled my hips closer to the edge of the bed. I shut my eyes as he lined his cock up with my entrance. No matter how ready I was and how much I wanted it, it was still a reflex. I barely felt the tip, but I knew more was coming. He held my hands in his, interlocking our fingers as he pushed further. The stretch stung a little. He was bigger than Parker and without taking the time to prepare me, it burned slightly. I whimpered softly and he stilled immediately. Only about half was inside of me. “No, no keep going. Please.” I begged.
“I don’t want to hurt you Juliette.”
“Montgomery. I need you to do it. It hurts more if you stop. Please just do it. You can give me time to adjust after.” I told him seriously, staring into his eyes.
“Okay. Deep breath.” I sucked in a big breath and let it out as he quickly thrust the rest of his cock into me. I yelped sharply and he stilled again. I felt him go to pull out and growled harshly at him.
“Don’t you dare. Just give me a second.” He nodded and stayed still, allowing me time to adjust to his size.
After a minute or so, I was ready. The pain had dissipated for the most part. I felt like we could keep going. “Okay.” I nodded. His thrusts were slow and shallow at first. The more he did it, the more comfortable it became. When my moans grew louder, his thrusting became faster. He was fucking me hard and fast. Quite literally fucking me into the mattress. I tried to match him thrust for thrust. It was sloppy at first, but soon enough, we had a good rhythm going. He leaned down more, and I wrapped my legs around his waist. His cock was buried deeper in me and I screamed. He was moaning and grunting softly in my ear. I let go of his hands and wrapped my arms around his back. Dragging my nails down, I scratched him from his shoulder blades all the way down to his mid to low back.
“Jesus Christ.” He spat out. I smirked and dug my nails into his back. He nipped my collar bone. I was panting and I could feel my core tightening. “Fuck. You are so fucking tight.” Monty stood straight again and hooked one of my legs over his shoulder. The changed angle felt like magic. My moans had become whimpers again. I bit my bottom lip to keep from screaming once again. He used his right hand to rub my clit harshly while his left steadied the leg on his shoulder. I couldn’t hold a scream in after that. His thrusts were starting to get sloppy just as I had begun to fall over the edge. My orgasm hit me like a freight train. My entire body shook. I groaned when I felt his own orgasm hit. The feeling of his cock pulsing inside of me was exquisite. Thank God for birth control and regular testing. Monty pulled out of me gently and half fell, half laid down onto my bed beside me. He was panting harshly. So was I.
“Fuck me.” I muttered.
“I just did.” He panted. I groaned, unable to find the energy to flip him off or move or make an actual noise in response. After a couple of minutes, he stood and put his boxers back on. I hadn’t moved. He walked to the bathroom across the hall, and I heard the water running. Back in my room, he gently wiped me clean with a warm washcloth. It felt very nice on my sensitive folds. I groaned again. Once I was wiped clean, he climbed on the bed again and pulled me close. I snuggled against his chest.
I woke up in Montgomery’s strong arms the next morning. Rubbing the sleep from my eyes, I groaned softly. Monty stirred behind me. I leaned into him. He sighed. “Half of me thought last night was a really hot dream.” He mumbled sleepily.
“It wasn’t.” I yawned. We rolled onto our backs and I stared at the ceiling. We were quiet for a time. I was processing what happened last night. I cheated on Parker. With the one person…. The one person what? I told him not to worry about? I mean, yeah. But if that was the reason, I would have regretted it as soon as we were done. Oh shit. What does this mean for our friendship?
“Do you regret it?” I paused before answering. I knew the answer already but what would it say about me if I answered him immediately?
“No. Do you?”
“Not a bit.”
“What does this mean? What are we supposed to do now?”
“I don’t know. I can’t tell you what to do. But if I were you, I would break up with Parker.”
“That would be the kind thing to do.”
“Yes.”
“Did… did you mean what you said last night?”
“About you?”
“Yeah.”
“Isn’t it kind of obvious?” He motioned between the two of us. I laughed.
“I just wanted to confirm.” Monty chuckled and turned to kiss my temple.
“Does this mean,” I paused again, “was this just to get it out of our systems? Or do you want more?”
“I want more if you want more. I’d also be down for another round.” I sat up a little and pulled the sheet around my chest to look at him. He was smirking wider than I had seen him smirk in a long time.
“I think I would like more. And as for another round, I think I need to talk to Parker first before this goes any further.” He considered that for a moment.
“That’s fair. I can respect that.” We were quiet again. He’s all you’ve ever really wanted anyway.
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sprnklersplashes · 3 years ago
Text
songwriter!janis fic (unrequited crush, no-very-happy-ending) 
also on ao3
It all started because she loved Taylor Swift when she was in middle school. Who is she kidding, she still loves Taylor Swift, but that’s where all this began. A middle school girl’s obsession with Taylor Swift. A confused, sad girl with a broken heart and smudged black eyeliner, finding refuge in lyrics about loneliness and anger and revenge. They became anthems for her, mantras to mutter when the warzone of middle school became too much for her.
“Someday, I’ll be living in a big old city, and all you’re ever gonna be is mean.”
“Cause I knew you were trouble when you walked in.”
“I can still see you, this ain’t the best view.”
It amazes her. It’s honestly as if Taylor Swift has managed to look into her life and given her a bundle of songs for whatever she needs. For when Regina has thrown her one too many snide looks, for when she’s standing at the door of North Shore High on her first day, for when she eats lunch alone, for when her mom is the best mom she could have asked for, for when she and Damian are lying on the grass in her backyard, staring up at the sky, laughing at absolutely nothing. The songs become the soundtrack to her life, the chords and those raw, honest lyrics an emotional outlet she so desperately craves. Taylor, and her songs, become a confidant, almost a close friend who always knows what to say.
With all that in mind, perhaps it was only a matter of time before she asks for a guitar for Christmas. She’s fourteen, braces and a slight lisp, and jumps up and down like a mad woman when she sees it under the tree.
She practices for three days straight, until her fingers bleed, but Should’ve Said No is the first song she learns off by heart. She yells the lyrics with maybe a little too much passion, but her parents applaud her nonetheless.
Like she said, that’s how it all started.
Because that same Christmas, she realises that screaming her feelings while playing guitar actually feels pretty cathartic. And that if it worked for Taylor Swift, it could work for her. So she writes stuff down, plays around with chords and strumming until the beat on the guitar matches the one in her head. She grabs a page and a pencil and writes and re-writes her innermost thoughts and feelings on the page until they sound the way she wants them to. She plays around with rhyme schemes and structure and everything she’s been taught about in English class, and a thrill runs through her as she does so. It’s the same breathless high she feels when she paints or draws, the rush that comes from creating something.
Her parents sit on the other side of her bedroom door, no doubt exchanging worried glances as she repeats the same verse, same chorus, with only a word changed. She watches them when they think she can’t see, peering through the crack in her door. The conclusion they seem to come to is ‘well, as coping mechanisms go, it’s pretty good, and she’s happy, so who are we to stop it?’.
It takes her four days to finish her first song. And it sucks. But she keeps it, writes down the lyrics and chords in one of the few empty notebooks she has, and there’s no going back from it now. She writes, and she writes, and she writes, near enough every day. She likes to think she gets better with each one. She learns more chords, buys a cheap ukulele the summer after freshman year, tries her hand at piano during a particularly difficult few weeks. She doesn’t plan on doing anything with them. They’re just her little pieces to hold on to. Her therapy sessions outside the carpeted office.
No-one knows about it. She has a reputation to keep up, after all. The loner-by-choice, too-cool-for-school, aloof art freak. Everyone has their roles to play in the ecosystem that is high school and, much as she hates the entire system, that is hers to play. And she plays it well, if she may say so. The fact that hardly anyone knows her past that facade suits her just fine. After all, if people think she doesn’t care, she can’t get hurt. No-one needs to know that Janis Sarkisian actually has feelings.
Even less need to know that she writes songs about said feelings.
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By the time she reaches her junior year, she’s onto her third notebook. She keeps them tucked away in her sock drawer, expertly hidden so only she can find them. Damian teases her about it, calling her “the protagonist of a Disney Channel Original Movie”. She just rolls her eyes and reminds him that “if either of us is gonna be Disney’s first openly gay character, it’ll be you”. He can’t argue with that.
It should be noted that when Janis said that no-one knows about her songwriting, Damian was the obvious exception. He found out just weeks after she started. There’s no keeping secrets from him.
Between all her notebooks, she’s written around forty songs.
Then she meets Cady Heron one day. The human embodiment of a labrador puppy, complete with wide, lost eyes. She likes her instantly, decides to take her under her wing because Lord knows the girl needs it. Cady’s smile is infectious, her laugh like a summer breeze. She has dimples and caramel-coloured hair and really likes maths.
She meets Cady on a Monday.
By that Saturday, song number 41-titled “Dimples and Curls” is more or less complete.
She plays it for Damian, hands only slightly shaking as she changes chords, the strumming short and upbeat, the melody strangely happy for such a bittersweet song.
He applauds her, but the subject of the song hangs in the air even after she’s played the last chord and the music fades. Unsaid, but not unknown. Just like her songwriting, Janis couldn’t keep a crush from Damian if she tried.
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“Hey, check it out.”
Cady drops onto the seat across from Janis, the whole table shaking as she does so. Like a small meteor just hit Earth. Janis looks up from her lunch, pretending like she had been doing her own thing and not watching the door until Cady came in. Pretending like her stomach doesn’t do little flips at the sight of her crossing the cafeteria. She pulls the flyer towards her and hums in amusement.
“The winter talent show,” she reads before chomping off a carrot stick. “Oh, is it that time of year already?”
“Seems like only yesterday we was welcoming the young’uns into this brave new world during the harvest season,” Damian sighs, putting on a delightfully over the top Southern Belle accent, no doubt influenced by their reading of Streetcar Named Desire in English class. Janis cackles, and nearly chokes on her lunch as she does.
“And now the cold winds of winter are descending upon us,” she replies, her accent equally heavy. She bats her eyes for good measure, because she can and because it makes Cady laugh. “Oh but I pray the children will survive this season, it is often rough for them.”
“I am never showing you two anything winter related ever again,” Cady says.
Janis just shrugs and runs her hand through her hair before her eyes go back to the flyer. Clearly, whatever sophomore they got to design it this year did their best; found the prettiest looking snowflakes on Google Images to put on the cartoon stage, decided to write in some swirling, slanted font rather than the start-studded block lettering they usually went for. It’s still the same as it is every year, meaning just as mockable, but she’ll give them points for tying.
“Well, anyone here going for it?” she asks. She looks from Damian to Cady and back again, a teasing smirk on her lips. “Last year and all that.”
“Not sure I can,” Damian sighs. “I mean, I’m booked up with Spelling Bee rehearsals and spring cabaret auditions happening next semester.” He drums his fingers against his throat. “Gotta give the little vocal chords some rest, you know?”
Janis’ response is to sing the lowest note she possibly can before turning to Cady and giving her a pointed look, the corner of her mouth quirked up.
“Who? Me?” Cady’s cheeks turned crimson and she shakes her head so much that the caramel curls bounced around her shoulders. “No way. Damian can take the stage, I’m fine with my calculators and textbooks.”
“You could always solve equations in front of everyone,” Janis says. “I could call out college-level questions from the audience and you solve them in under 30 seconds.”
“I think I’ll pass,” she giggles. She leans forward slightly, eyes glittering, and Janis does her best not to squirm. The effect Cady Heron’s eyes have on her should be studied by scientists. “What about you, Janis?”
“I don’t know.” She thinks back to when she helped on stage crew last year, as well as helping out (or taking over) with the set design. It had been fun, the kind of challenge she needed to keep her mind off the slowly-going-off-the-rails plan. And she was told it looked good on her college applications, because all people can think about apparently is college, college, college. “Maybe. They might need another genius stage manager.”
“And you’ll step in if they can’t find one?” She digs Damian in the ribs for that comment.
“But not performing?” Cady asks, and Janis freezes. Performing had never even crossed her mind before. She’s used to backstage, hell, she likes backstage. It’s not that she has stage fright or anything, and if she had, her stunt at Ms Norbury’s little healing session would have squished it. She had just never thought about it.
But Cady had, apparently.
“I-No, I-I don’t think so,” she stammers out. “Um, I might do backstage again, but not actually doing something, you know, talent related.” She bites her tongue and clamps her lips shut before anything else can come out.
“Okay then,” Cady replies slowly. She gets up from the table, her little empty water bottle in her hands. “I’m going to go for a refill, save my seat.”
“No problem,” Janis says, but Cady’s already jogging away.
She doesn’t know if it’s good or bad that Cady’s known her too long to think of her as cool, and so this kind of awkward babbling isn’t really surprising to her. Instead of thinking about it, she just sets her head on the table and lets Damian rub her back.
“You were nowhere near as bad as you think you were,” he assures her.
“Title of your sex tape,” comes her murmured reply. Damian chuckles and runs his fingers through her hair, like she’s his pet cat. It helps.
“So you’re definitely not going for the talent show then?” he asks.
Her first instinct is to say no, because of course she isn’t, because she never has before and she sees no point in breaking a three-year streak, but the answer catches in her throat. At the same time, something begins forming in her brain, pieces of a melody she’s already known, words filling in blank spots in her brain, and her fingers twitch involuntarily, playing the chords on an invisible guitar. Without a word, she grabs a notepad and pen from her bag and scribbles the words down before she forgets them, quickly becoming breathless just by sitting there. She forgets, for a moment, everything else, the talent show, Cady, even Damian next to her, and just revels in the task and the quick buzz she gets just from writing. Just like that she has one eye on the clock, itching to get home and put her notes into the rest of the song.
But with those notes came an idea, an idea so completely out of left field she almost laughs at it.
“Janis?” Damian asks, just slightly unnerved by her. If anyone else were at this table, even Cady (especially Cady), she would have had to excuse herself and run to the bathroom, or just hope the words stayed in her head long enough for her to get a quiet moment. “Did the Goddess of Music just possess you again?”
“Maybe,” is her response. He doesn’t know it, but she answered both the questions he asked in the past minute.
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She sits on her bed that night, her homework half-done and strewn across the desk, abandoned in favour of the guitar sitting in her lap and notebook open on her bed. She’s been working on his song for the better part of a week, inspiration and motivation seemingly striking and then fading whenever she gets a free moment. Abandoning it has crossed her mind-she’s no stranger to abandoning things that aren’t working-but for some reason she hasn’t quite been able to shake this particular song off.
Maybe it is Euterpe, the Goddess of Music, descending upon her because this song has to be finished, it has to be, Olympus willing it so.
Or maybe it’s because this song is one of the most personal things she’s ever written, a love letter she’ll never send, and the idea of it sitting unfinished drives her crazy.
She plays another chord and sings the line again, changing the ending slightly, and makes the adjustment in her notes.
She’s crazy. This is already crazy, her secret double life as a wannabe T-Swift, but now she’s gone beyond that. Thinking of actually playing it. On a stage. In front of people. She doesn’t care what people think of her, she stopped caring about that a long, long time ago, but holy shit what will people think of her after she does this? Life isn’t like the movies, she knows that much. It won’t be some pretty, softly-lit moment where the crowd sits with teary eyes, Cady runs onstage and kisses her and she’s offered a deal by some big shot producer, and they all live happily ever after the end. What could happen is people think she’s even more of a weirdo than they do now.
Or she gets tomatoes thrown at her head and she’s booed off the stage. That’s a possibility.
She calls Damian, because that’s the only way she sees out of her little thought cul-de-sac. She puts the phone on speaker and props it up against a pillow, keeping her hands free for her guitar and her pen. He picks up on the third ring, just as she’s strumming out a G chord.
“Oh, is someone prepping for her Grammy?” he asks. “You’re still taking me as your date, right?”
“Only if my dog can’t go,” she replies. She taps her nails against the wood, the rhythm too fast and frantic to just be a habit. Yes, she can tell Damian anything, and being nervous in front of him is laughable, but sometimes her body forgets that. “So, I was thinking about the talent show.”
“Oh? You’re going for stage crew again? Cool.”
“No-not exactly.” She knows he can’t see the smile creeping across her face, but she’d wager he can hear it through the phone. A small swarm of butterflies flutters in her chest, leaving her just slightly out of breath. “I… I. think I’m going to try performing in it.”
A burst of laughter comes through the phone, slightly tinged with static, and Janis wishes he were here so she could slap him. Even if it’s not malicious in intent at all, and she’s laughing right along with him. Slapping is kind of a love language for them.
“Okay, okay cool. What’re you going to do?”
“I’ll give you a hint,” she says, and then she plays the opening chords to her latest experiment. She doesn’t add in the lyrics, not yet. Still, she sits back and basks in his applause when she finishes, cackling into her hand. He might be one person, but he’s got enough enthusiasm to match a packed auditorium. “What do you think?”
“I’m into it,” he tells her. “So… that’s the one you’re doing?”
“Think so.” She tosses the pick between her fingers. Like he could feel her smile, she can feel his raised eyebrow through the phone, the elephant in the room poking her with its trunk. “Yes, I know.”
“I didn’t say anything.”
“You thought it,” she tells him, and he doesn’t deny it. She looks back over the lyrics she’s written and re-written. Despite some adjustments, it’s still in essence the same. Still about a girl with pretty hair who smells like vanilla and cinnamon, who has a boyfriend and is unknowingly breaking the heart of a girl with black eyeliner and paint stained fingers. Because her boyfriend is pretty and clean and smells like soap and can do math, and how is the poor art girl even meant to compare to that?
“Yes,” she says after a while. “It is about Cady.”
“Aw, my poor lovestruck songstress,” he sighs. He shifts then, and the air shifts with him. “You sure that’s the one you want to sing? I mean you have dozens of other non-Cady related songs. I’m sure Mr Duvall would love to hear Angry Teenage Lesbian Anthem.”
“First off, I gave that one a title, it’s called Shattered,” she reminds him. “And-” She freezes, the rest of her sentence catching in her throat. He’s right. She could perform one of her other songs, that are already finished and therefore removing the pressure to have this one finished, polished and stage-ready. And of course, it would mean she wouldn’t be standing in front of her entire grade and telling them all how badly she’s in love with her best friend. Showing her deepest secret to the people who have already driven her out of school once. It’s a far safer, potentially less traumatic option for her.
But…
“No,” she says. “I know it sounds crazy but I feel like… I feel like I need to do this.” She swallows thickly and picks softly at the guitar strings. “It’s like… like this way at least I’m telling her, you know? Even if she doesn’t know it.”
Of course, Damian gets it.
“That’s beautiful, babe,” he tells her. “So you’re actually doing this?”
“I’m actually doing this,” she replies firmly. “And tomorrow, I need you to make sure I don’t chicken out before I sign up.”
“Got it. I’ll just order you to do it as Senior Co-Chair of the Student Activities Committee.”
“That’s an abuse of power.”
“Then consider yourself abused baby.” He laughs and she laughs with him, and then she hears something on Damian’s end. “I have to go. A certain little sister of mine has a princess costume that needs attending to. See you later.”
“See you later,” she replies before he clicks off the call. She looks down at her paper, then at her guitar, and thinks about what she just committed to. “I’ve got some work to do.”
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The song goes through four rewrites in the weeks leading up to the talent show. The whole first verse is changed, the chorus scrapped and replaced with a new one, then that one is scrapped and she goes back to the old one. She sits hunched on her floor with a pencil in her mouth, wondering if what she’s written is too personal or not personal enough. If it’s too obvious that Cady, smart cookie that she is, will work it out and that’ll lead them down a new, scary path. She cuts some lyrics that give the game away, opting to replace one about love for numbers with love for learning, because that opens up the pool to half their grade. She writes about Cady’s blue eyes rather than specifically those double dimples that make her melt. Maybe she’s compromising her artistic vision, but it might be worth it if it’ll keep her crush a secret. She keeps the old lyrics tucked in the back of her notebook, just to have them.
Meanwhile, she’s also dealing with the fact that people know she has signed up for the talent show. That Miss Too Cool For School Loner Art Freak Janis is actually performing at a school event. And she doesn’t even get extra credit for it. They’re surprised, and curious, and none more so than Cady. The other girl appears at her side almost instantly after first period, skinny little arms wrapped around her bicep and blue eyes alight.
Oh, the things those eyes do to her.
“Janis!” she squeaks. “I saw-on the sign up sheet-your name! Oh my God, is this a joke? Did Damian put you up to it?”
“No, no, I signed up of my own accord,” Janis tells her. That only makes Cady bounce more, ponytail bobbing up and down.
“Oh wow, that’s amazing!” she says. She stops then, her mouth freezing in its place and her cheeks turning pink. Slowly, she comes down to Earth, like a balloon that had the air let out of it. Janis can almost hear the wheeze. “I mean um, it’s pretty cool, I guess.”
“It’s pretty grool,” Janis replies, and just like that Cady bounces back up again.
“Oh my gosh, what are you going to do?” she asks. “Or do you want it to be a surprise?”
“You think I have some secret knife-throwing talent?” she grins. She hesitates for a moment, looking down at Cady’s excited face, because even if this isn’t telling her… it’s telling her. “I’m… I’m going to sing.” She pulls on the strap of her backpack and avoids Cady’s eyes. “Something I wrote.”
“Okay,” Cady says. “Who are you and what have you done with my best friend?”
“Hey!” she laughs. “I can write stuff. I can be deep.”
“Oh, I have no doubt about it,” Cady says, bumping her arm against Janis’. “But for real, Janis, I can’t wait to see it. I know you’ll be amazing.”
Warmth spreads across her pale cheeks, a pink blush no doubt colouring her face, and she somehow manages to choke out a “thanks” as her brain turns to static. Her only thought is ‘Cady thinks I’m going to be good’, and it’s written in glitter pen across her brain.
“This is going to be great,” she goes on. “Oh, wait until I tell Aaron. He’s got a break in his schedule that week so he’s coming up to see the talent show! Isn’t that great?”
And just like that, Janis’ good mood falls. Her face stays the same, because she’s trained to do it, but everything behind it crumbles.
“Yeah, that’s great,” she replies. Cady squeezes her hand, oblivious, and drags her along the hallway, chatting away about some lion documentary she had watched last night.
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She finishes the song that night. She arrives home with a heavy chest, so full of complicated, messy feelings, and her conversation with Cady still so fresh in her mind, her ears still ringing from the emotional whiplash. Her parents barely get a ‘hello’ as she enters and bolts up to her room, her hands shaking, the thoughts swirling around her brain desperate to be let out.
And let them out she does. She writes so quickly they look more like smudges than words, her fingers flying over rapidly changing chords, her voice broken and panting as she sings. The words almost write themselves, like the song has taken on a life of its own and she’s just along for the ride. She barely remembers to pause, to breathe, so wrapped up in the storm she’s created with just her guitar and pen.
It’s only when she finishes and falls back on her bed that she notices the tears in her eyes. She blinks them away and pulls herself up, her notebook in her hand. It’s done. The perfect blend of her own honest feelings and just enough smokescreen to keep people from knowing who it’s really about.
There’s no backing out now, she thinks. Her stomach drops, like she’s on the top of a roller coaster about to go down. A laugh bubbles up in her throat and leaves her breathless, her head spinning while she’s still laying there.
If holy shit were am adjective, she'd use it to describe how she feels. Because holy shit.
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Being backstage when she’s not on crew is a strange experience. She stands with her guitar slung around her body, in the middle of a current of students moving around her, half with the clunky microphones and walkie-talkies she’s used so many times before. She asks five of them if she can do anything to help-because they’re her people and she needs to do something to occupy her time-until she finally takes the hint and leaves them to it. Stagehands are the most efficient parts of any production, as she told Damian once. They’re a well-oiled machine at this point.
“Yo!” For a second, Janis thinks she imagined the whisper, just one in a jumble of backstage noises, until Damian appears at her side. A tiny ‘shit’ escapes her mouth, her body jerking. Barely anyone bats an eye at her, except him. “Sorry, didn’t mean to spook you.”
“Don’t worry. I think at this point a small breeze could knock into me and I’d crumble.”
“The great Janis Sarkisian gets nervous?” he asks, eyebrow raised.
“Only when she’s doing something incredibly personal and scary in front of her entire grade,” she whispers back. She swallows past the lump in her throat. “Aside from that I’m a beacon of confidence and unshakable will.”
“Hey.” He taps his knuckles against hers. “Remember how scared you were at Norbury’s assembly?”
“You mean after I had my picture all over the school with the d-slur written underneath it?” she mutters. “Yeah, I was shitting myself.”
“And yet, look what you did there,” he reminds her. “You were amazing. And you’re going to be amazing here too. Once you get on that stage, all those butterflies are going to make you fly, kid.”
She smiles, her heart warm, and pressed her face into the crook of Damian’s neck.
She doesn’t know how she got so lucky to have him, but she knows better than to tempt fate.
“Janis Sarkisian?” She lifts her head to find a freshman girl with a headset around her neck looking at her. “You’re up next.”
“Okay.” It’s only now she becomes aware that the last minute of Fairytale Of New York is playing, the notes will soon fade out, and that’s her cue. She turns to Damian and lets him straighten her black cardigan and fiddle with the collar of her shirt. “Wish me luck.”
“You don’t need it.” He drops a whisper of a kiss to her nose. “But good luck.”
She holds her half-heart necklace as he goes, the twin to the one around his neck. It’s as close as she can get to having him with her. Her chest tightens as she makes her way to the stage and she tries to breathe through it, because the next thign she knows, Mr Duvall is announcing her name, and she’s being greeted by a blinding spotlight that thankfully obscures most of her peers’ faces.
“Uh, hi,” she says into the microphone placed out for her. It’s just people , she reminds herself. Somewhere in that crowd, second row, seat 14, is Damian, and she breathes easier. And next to him is Cady, the girl this song is about, and for some reason that straightens her spine and irons out the shaking in her voice. She takes the pick out of its holder and tosses her hair back. “This is a song I wrote about being in love with someone who doesn’t love you back.” She blinks and hopes no-one sees the tears in her eyes. “So sing along if you get into it, because we all know it’s a shitty ass feeling.”
She plays the first chord, and then any and all doubts she had about this flee her. As cliche as it sounds, the song takes over her, and she blows through the nerves in the first verse. The experience becomes cathartic instead, like releasing a pressure valve on her soul. Even with the little diversions she threw in, she hasn’t felt this open and god damn free since last year, paraded on her peers’ shoulders with both middle fingers up. Except now she’s not flipping anyone off, or proving a point, she’s just finally telling someone how she feels, and holy shit, it’s amazing. Whatever the aftermath of this is, she won’t care, it’s worth it just for this feeling.
As she sings the last word, and that final note rings in the auditorium, her hands are shaking, her cheeks wet with tears and her hair sticky with sweat. She touches beneath her eye and her fingers come away stained black.  She hasn’t cried in front of people since middle school. She doesn’t care.
The cheers of her classmates ring in her ears, Damian’s whooping the loudest of all, and as she takes her bow, she hopes she’ll remember this moment for a long time.
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“Oh my God!” she’s barely into the auditorium when Cady launches herself at her, arms wrapped around her neck and legs circling her waist. Janis nearly topples over, digging her back leg into the ground just in time, and hugs Cady with the same ferocity. “You were amazing!” she yells into her shoulder, the sound muffled by Janis’ hair.
“Really?”
“Absolutely.” She sets Cady down, but the other girl keeps a tight grip on both her arms. Janis wonders if it’s to keep herself from flying away, given the amount of bouncing up and down she’s doing. “I can’t believe you wrote that! It was so good! You need to record it, Jan. Do you have any other songs?”
“Just a few,” she says. “And I don’t know if I’m in the business of making an album any time soon.” She swings her guitar case a little. “This might have been a one-time thing.”
“Well, even if it was, it was awesome,” she says.
“Thank you, Caddy,” Janis replies. “That means a lot.”
Her mouth runs dry as Cady smiles, all baby pink lipgloss and sparkling eyes and full cheeks. If this were a movie, she thinks, this would be the part where they kiss. No need for talking, or an explanation. Because Cady would have just known. The music would turn soft and twinkly, and the lighting would match it and it would look like they’re in a dream and they’d just kiss, and it will fix all of Janis’ problems. Maybe a single tear will run down her cheek. And then they’ll run off into their new lives as the end credits roll.
How sweet that would be.
But her life isn’t a movie. If she wants anything, she has to go for it herself.
And that includes-
“Caddy.” Her name is delicate on her lips, handled with care. Cady looks at her, giving a simple ‘mm-hm’ in response, and Janis’ heart beats out of control. “That song I just sang, it-”
“Hey, guys.”
Also if this was a movie, Cady’s sweet, lovely, nice boyfriend would not be barging in right now. He’d either be a douchebag who she doesn’t feel bad about hurting, or he’d be nonexistent.
Unfortunately, this is not a movie, and Aaron Samuels exists and is the human equivalent of a squishmallow.
“Hey Aaron.” He slings his arm around Cady’s shoulders, and she leans into his touch almost instinctively. “Janis, you were great up there. I didn’t know you wrote songs.”
“It’s a bit of a new hobby,” she says, her voice hoarse. She clears her throat, and finds a bottle of water being handed to-thrown at-her.
“Hydrate those chords,” is Damian’s greeting.
“This is what I get for being friends with a theatre kid,” she sighs before she takes a drink. She hadn’t realised how dry her throat was until now.
“Okay, so we’re all going for pancakes,” Aaron says. “I take it you two are coming?”
“How can I say no to pancakes?” Janis asks. “Uh, you guys go ahead, I have to get my stuff from the green room.”
“Okay, we’ll wait for you,” Cady says. “Aaron brought his car so he can drive us.”
“Grool.” Cady and Aaron turn around together, Aaron spinning his eyes around his finger and Cady lacing her fingers through his, talking about something she can’t hear. It’s like watching them through a sheet of glass.
Not a movie. Not unless it’s one of those really, really sad movies. Sad homophobic movies.
“You okay?” Damian asks. She snorts at the question. Nothing has changed, so of course she’s okay. But then, nothing has changed, so she’s not really okay.
“I did it,” she sighs. “It’s out there. I told her, unofficially. Whether or not she works it out…” She runs her hand through her tangled hair. “That’s something else entirely.” Damian hums in agreement, a sympathetic look on his face that soon morphs into a grin.
“Hey,” he says. “I’m proud of you.”
“Thanks Mom.” They snort, Janis caught between a laugh and a sob, and squeezes Damian’s hand. She’s not optimistic about any romance in her future, at least where Cady is concerned. She and Aaron are still rock-solid and she’s happy for them, whenever she isn’t angsting about it. It’s a weird combination to have.
And at least she’s done this now. Despite a future for her and Cady not being in the cards for now, she’s glad she did it. The secret isn’t out, not entirely. Just written on the walls in invisible ink.
“Come on,” she tells Damian. “I actually do have to get my bag, and you can use this as an opportunity to double check the ghost light is on.”
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Cady and Aaron keep their promise and wait for them, waving off their apologies as they jog across the parking lot. Cady lets Damian take the front seat with Aaron and slides into the back with Janis instead. Janis frowns, confused as to why she isn’t taking her normal seat up front, and Cady rolls her eyes.
“There was a draw on the way here, and we lost,” she explains. “And now Damian has control of the aux chord,” She gestures with her head to the passenger seat, and Janis turns just in time to see him open his Spotify and scroll through his playlists. As the opening notes to Waving Through A Window fill the car, it’s met with three loud groans. Damian only turns it up louder, and adds in his own backing vocals.
“So, that song you sang,” Cady asks, leaning back in the seat. “Was it about anyone in particular?”
Janis looks down, her hands pressed together in her lap. If this is the moment the universe decided to give her, it’s a really terrible moment. Not only is Cady’s whole boyfriend sitting an arm’s length away from her, but she left her nerve back in the auditorium. Clearly, her and fate aren’t on each other’s wavelength.
“You wouldn’t know her,” she says. “She doesn't even go here.”
“Oh,” Cady replies. Her face falls, but she’s not too put out by it. Why would she be? She nudges Janis’ shoulder, a proud smile on her face, and squeezes Janis’ hand. “Well, if she has someone like you into her and she hasn’t taken the chance yet, then she doesn’t know what she’s missing.”
Janis only thanks her, and quickly changes the subject.
Someday she might tell her for real, but for now she'll stick to the songs.
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heckyeahponyscans · 3 years ago
Video
youtube
Yeloli Watch Party!
Episode 4: Am I a Super Hero?
English translation
Previously, Mary lost her math notebook and her horrible teacher was about to shame her.  We pick up right where we left off, with Mary, tears welling, shuffling towards the front of the class.
Last week I noticed Mary had a jellybean in her backpack and didn’t think much of it other than “oh, nice background detail.” Little did I know that the jellybean . . . was a plot point!
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The jellybean glows and . . . turns into Mary’s math notebook!  After a moment Shelly glances over and notices it.  “Isn’t this your notebook, Mary?”  
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Mean Teacher says “Next time find it sooner” but accepts the notebook, and Mary returns to her seat, thrilled and relieved.
The next day the teacher hands back the corrected assignments. Only three students got perfect scores: Sean, Shelly, and . . . Mary!
Sidenote: Sean is wearing an electronic earpiece, maybe a hearing aid?
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Okay, back to this earth-shattering surprise!  Mary is floored by her perfect score was unsure about several of the answers on this assignment and, as we’ve previously learned, is bad at academics in general.  She gets rare praise from Horrible Teacher Man, which buoys her mood even more.
But when she gets her notebook back, she’s surprised to find some of her answers have been CHANGED.  Who did it?  Is someone helping her?
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She puzzles about it for a bit before putting her notebook in her bag--where, unbeknownst to her, it turns into a jellybean again!
After math class is P.E. (physical education), where the class has to run laps.
Mary and the kid behind her, who I feel bad about calling “the fat kid” but they haven’t said his name even once and I have to differentiate him from the other kids SOMEhow, agree to run together, because they’re both slow.  
Let’s call him Peter until we get an official name.
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As I’ve mentioned before, the running looks funny / odd.
But anyway, Mary and Peter stumble along the course. After getting lapped by the fastest kid (Bandaid Boy), Peter decides he’s sick of running.  He’s going to hide behind a statue, wait until just before the end of class, and then complete the last lap. The teacher will never notice!
Now personally I think this is a brilliant plan, but Mary disagrees.  Her mother told her winning wasn’t the important thing, the important thing is to try your best.  So while Peter hides, Mary keeps running.
She gets lapped by the rest of the class, including Mean Girl, who of course takes the time to razz Mary. “Are you a turtle? Mary, you're not very pretty, you're not very smart, you're bad at sports, and your family is poor. If I were you, I would be ashamed to leave the house.”
WOW.  Even Gary Oak wasn’t quite this bad.
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Mary stops in her tracks to glare after Mean Girl as she pulls ahead.
“Even though I'm not very smart, I always do my best! Sooner or later, I'll be good at something. I am sure!” she thinks.
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And back in the classroom, the jellybean glows . . .
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And Mary’s plain, worn white shoes turn into rad pink running shoes!
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The shoes let her run ridiculously fast, and soon she has not only caught up with the rest of the class, but is neck-in-neck with Bandaid Boy, the athletic kid. Bandaid Boy summons one final effort and comes in first, barely.
Soon he and the rest of the class are congratulating Mary, except Mean Girl who asks if she’s been “taking” something, like she thinks there’s a middle school doping ring going on.  Mary is happy but confused and says she doesn’t know how she ran so fast.  When she looks down, she is wearing her old, scuffed white shoes again.
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With the school day at an end, Mary sits down and reflects on the weird events of the day.  “It’s like someone was using magic to help me.”
Now here’s where the episode surprised me.  I thought the evil woman in black had been using magic to spy on Mary and grant her wishes so she could swoop in and tempt her again.  After all, these were wishes her magic gems could grant--making Mary smart and good at sports.
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Instead the jellybean floats out of the bag and turns into Loli, who’s like, “It was MEEEE!”
Flashback to Mary saying Loli couldn’t go to school with her and Loli turning herself into a . . . gem? (okay, it wasn’t a jellybean, it was a gem) and sneaking into Mary’s backpack.  She made Mary’s math notebook appear and corrected the answers, then enchanted Mary’s sneakers to make her super fast.
Loli fails to notice Mary looking increasingly betrayed and upset as she says all this and is like “Yeah! I did a great job, right?”
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Upset, Mary tells her never to do that again.  Loli is confused.  Didn’t it make Mary happy, getting her wishes granted?
Mary replies that she was happy . . . when she thought she was succeeding through her own efforts, not doll-generated superpowers.  (And if it seems kind of obvious that something was up, well, Mary is canonically kinda dense . . . Shelly was side-eyeing the hell out of the desk after the notebook magically appeared in a pile of papers Mary had already looked through ten times. And meanwhile Mary was just like “I guess I didn’t look hard enough :) :) :)”.)
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Loli finally Gets It and agrees to respect Mary’s wishes.  She recounts how the doll shop is full of fairies-turned-lifeless-dolls who can only regain life if a child loves them--essentially hinting that she was trying to impress Mary.
She also reveals that she’d seen Mary before she came to the shop (through magic fairy powers, I guess) and been impressed by her kindness and gentleness.  Loli was the one who caused the magic petals to lead Mary to the doll shop.
With the two seeing eye to eye again, Mary says she wants to keep improving and someday be as good as Shelly.  Shelly is a top student and top athlete, and Mary greatly admires her.
“But for some reason,” Mary says, “she always seems very lonely.”
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We cut to Shelly, who is making her way out of the school as all her schoolmates invite each other over to play and make plans.  She’s envious them; they have time to play and socialize, while her after-school routine involves more studying.
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The driver is waiting outside, but as Mary walks towards it, Peter--who is hanging with Mean Girl and her lackey--calls out, inviting her to join them for ice cream.
I am FLOORED to learn that Mean Girl hangs out with Peter after school.  (My theory is she either solely torments Mary or else she just likes to have other people around to pick on.)
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Shelly is instantly like “OMG, ice cream sounds so good!!”, but the driver is all, “Miss Shelly, don’t forget you have piano lessons, followed by five other extracurriculars”, and she reluctantly declines the invitation.
Mean Girl, being just The Worst, says, “She thinks that because she's pretty, she can look down on us.Am I right or am I right?” and her lackey agrees, noting, “she has her own driver, and is so privileged.  Meanwhile Peter is just like :( .  You’re a nice kid, Peter.
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Meanwhile Mary is in the car, watching her happy classmates through the window and feeling depressed.  She asks the driver not to pick her up or bring her to school anymore.
But he’s like, “So you want your parents to FIRE me?”
No, Shelly says, she just wants to socialize with her peers after school.
The driver reminds her that she’s on “a very tight schedule” with her billion extracurriculars, because her parents are clearly That Kind, and says she would never get to them in time without being rushed to and fro in the car.
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Shelly acquiesces, resigning herself to a lonely childhood, when suddenly . . . petals!  Petals in the car, despite the closed windows!
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Shelly calls to the driver to stop the car and she jumps out.  She’s got to see where the petals are coming from!  And she heads down a familiar, narrow alley . . .  
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jade-marie · 4 years ago
Note
I didn't watch episode 4 but I saw gifs of Beth yelling at Jane and it got me thinking, what's your view on the Boland kids not being parented?
Lmao you love getting me in trouble🤣
Sorry. It got long but I could rant about this for weeks.
Pre canon and S1
Obviously, we don’t see anything pre canon when it comes to the Boland kids, but you can put together an idea of what their situation was like from the first few episodes. Beth was a SAHM - she made them fancy packed lunches for school, had them enrolled in extra curricular activities, dropped them off/picked them up from school, put them to bed, got them ready etc. She was the main caregiver and Dean was at work. When he came home, he got to be the fun dad.
It seems like they had a decent amount of structure, as far as schedules go, but they’ve never been given any responsibility and didn’t appear to be well disciplined. We had Kenny telling Beth she sucked at math in s1 - something I certainly wouldn’t have gotten away with. Anyway, they had a decent amount of structure and stability, they were used to things being a certain way and that was all disrupted when Dean was kicked out of the house. Then suddenly, Dean was back, but he was sharing a bedroom with Kenny. It doesn’t seem like any of this was really explained to the kids properly or that they were helped through the process, which can have some knock-on effects. 
Throughout Season 2
First episode of S2, Dean was shot. The kids were told that he was mugged and were, understandably, shaken up by the whole thing. Once again, nobody truly comforted or helped them through this process and we started to see the fallout of that. Kenny essentially developed an eating disorder and started bingeing, Jane “ran away from home”. But again, nothing is done about it. Beth says they need to be more present, no phones at dinner, they look into a child therapist, but we don’t ever hear about the kids actually getting therapy even though they desperately need it.
Throughout the season, the structure that they still had in S1 rapidly disappears. It goes from Beth being the main caregiver to her handing the reigns over to Dean in 2.05 and he doesn’t do a good job of it. The house becomes a mess, the kids run wild. This would be a perfect opportunity to start giving the older children some chores, helping to re-introduce structure, but it doesn’t happen. From the kids perspectives, they would notice their mother becoming more and more absent from their lives, missing dance recitals, coming home late, missing dinner, missing bedtime and so Dean is becoming the consistent parent (important for later).
Dean decides to weaponise the children, taking them away from Beth and going to stay with his mother for a while, before going back home. Beth and Dean tell the kids that they’re going to be getting a divorce, obviously that doesn’t happen, again creating quite an unstable environment for them. Effectively, they have a roof over their heads and they’re being fed/clothed, but nobody is actually parenting them. 
Throughout Season 3
At the beginning of S3, with the dealership gone and Beth no longer working for Rio, they have significantly less money. It’s not clear how much of a knock-on effect this had on their extra curricular activities because Jane still has her piano lessons and Kenny has hockey. Beth’s taking them to the park a lot, it’s also not clear whether this is simply because she’s stalking Rhea and Marcus or genuinely because the park is a free activity for them. Regardless, they’ve been going to the park enough that it’s no longer fun. The kids really don’t seem to have any structure anymore and, once again, it doesn’t seem like they’ve been receiving any emotional support during what would be a challenging time for any child. 
Dean has gone back to work, Beth is now also working, so Judith steps in to help take care of the kids. She takes things a little bit far, which pisses off Beth, so Judith is quickly removed from the equation. Again - instability. Then we have the fallout between Rhea and Beth, which means Jane can no longer play with her best friend Marcus for (at least from her perspective) absolutely no reason. Again – instability. Fast forward a few weeks, the entire house is emptied so the kids have to go and stay with Judith for an unspecified amount of time. Again – instability. We can play the blame game to decide who is the cause of this instability, but it’s pretty irrelevant. The fact is, the kids lives are being shaken up and nobody is helping them through it.
Beth buys new furniture, the kids come home, it all seems great, and then Dean gets arrested. So now their dad ,who has been the more consistent parent in their lives for the last year, is out of the picture. Once again, nobody is really offering them support during this time. We see Jane asking for her dad, we see the kids talking about how Dean lets them eat by the TV, because they’re missing things which have been consistent for them, and then we finally get to Janes little stand-off with Beth over the remote control.
That is quite clearly the result of her emotional needs going unmet for God knows how long, so she’s acting like a brat. Instead of taking care of and supporting her child, Beth lashes out. I find the editing choice to mute the yelling and playing music over the scene annoying, because it lightens it quite a bit. It’s pretty obvious that Beth was wildly over reacting to the situation, because she was lashing out at a child over things that had nothing to do with Jane. She was stressed about Dean, she was stressed about Fitzpatrick‘s upcoming murder and taking that out on a kid. Yeah, she felt bad and gave her a hug after, but you’ve still got 3/4 kids (is Kenny coming back??) who’ve been emotionally neglected for at least a year. 
Beth’s kids compared to Annie/Ben
We don’t really see a lot of Ben‘s relationship with Greg, it doesn’t seem like he’s a particularly bad parent in any way, Nancy is probably a bit neurotic, but nothing major. Annie, is pretty emotionally stunted and immature, she puts way too much responsibility on Ben, so it’s the complete opposite of Beth. Ben is effectively the grown-up in their relationship, he leaves reminders for his mother to make sure shit gets dealt with and any structure Ben has is structure he’s created for himself.
But at the same time, he trusts his mother and when something is bothering him he actually talks to her. We saw him come out to Annie before Greg and Nancy, he told Annie when he was being bullied. As he gets older, you can see him growing tired of parenting his mother, but I think she’s learning from her mistakes by recognising the way they’ve impacted her son.  I think it’s also important to remember that Ben has been largely unaffected by Annies criminal activities, this is predominantly because she has a shitload of baggage to deal with. 
Beth’s kids compared to Ruby and her kids
As a whole, Ruby‘s kids have been relatively unaffected by her criminal activities. It doesn’t look like they ever had a rigourous schedule of extracurricular activities, but they’ve always had a stable home life. Not financially well off, but happy. We’ve always seen them be respectful, they have boundaries with their parents, they don’t particularly misbehave etc. They just appear to be good kids with good parents. They witnessed Stan being arrested and Sara especially took that quite hard, but she was supported through it. It’s also quite clear that she’s had a good emotional support system throughout her illness and kidney transplant. When she found out that Ruby was up to something shady in S3 and their relationship became strained as a result, she spoke to her mother in a way which was disrespectful, eventually that behaviour was checked. Because Ruby and Stan parent their children.
Beth’s kids compared to Rio/Marcus
From the very first time we were introduced to Marcus, we’ve seen that he’s very polite, very well-balanced and has a good relationship with his dad. We’ve seen Rio patiently instil important lessons in his son, such as cleaning up his messes, being patient and waiting his turn - things which Beth’s kids still don’t understand.
For the most part, Marcus seems to be pretty well shielded from Rio’s criminal activities, which is why I think Marcus was so heavily affected by his dads absence in S3. But, unlike the Boland children, he was emotionally supported through the process by his mother. He went to her for comfort and he received it. When Rio isn’t around, Rhea appears to pick up the slack and ensure Marcus still has some stability.
I think they’ve deliberately contrasted Beth’s kids with the other children on the show. Her children are the only ones who seem to be truly feeling the effects of choices she’s made during the course of the series. She claims to be doing all of this for her kids, but is completely ignorant to the fact that her choices are hurting them. This isn’t me bashing her character or saying she’s a shitty mom because I don’t like her, this is just stating what’s happening on the screen and right now, whether or not it’s deliberate, she’s being a shitty parent. Dean has always been a shitty parent. So now those kids don’t have anyone😕
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craby-bouquet · 4 years ago
Text
Prince Minyun {CH}
~part 3~
Lee Jihoon x Reader
Romance, Royal!AU, Teacher!AU
3k words
Masterlist | SVT Masterlist | CH Masterlist
Pt.1 | Pt.2 | Pt.3 | Pt.4
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You were reading a book in your room, when, a quarter to one, someone knocked on your door. You frowned, you knew someone was picking you up, but would they really come this early?
You opened the door and looked right into the face of Dominick.
"Yo." He greeted.
You shifted your weight to one of your feet "Hi. I'm sorry, I can't hang out or anything, I'm about to get picked up by someone."
To your surprise he laughed "I know. I'm here to pick you up, miss."
Your eyes widened "You're the one to pick me up?"
"You sound like you think I'm too incompetent for such a task."
"Of course that's not what I think, I just- I hadn't expected you…" You looked at your feet, flustered. Why?
He chuckled "Is that a blush I spot on your cheeks?"
You frowned, blush only getting worse "No."
He was enjoying himself a little too much.
"Anyway," You got yourself together "I was told someone would pick me up at one, so I'm afraid I'm not quite ready to go yet."
"Someone would pick you up around one, yes. This is around. We have to be there at one. Anyway, get ready then." He waved you away.
You turned around to get some pens and paper, for notes and whatever else you would need them for. You had realised before that you had no idea what you were expected to do, you had no schedule for the year nor information on what the prince had already learned from other teachers. You couldn't imagine the seven year old prince not getting any lessons until now. You had hoped to get a schedule or anything from whomever came to pick you up. You decided to ask him about it on your way there.
"So, what are you gonna do with him today?" Dominick asked, "Are you gonna bombard him with maths on your first day, or do you want him to like you?"
You closed your door and locked it “That’s actually what I kind of wanted to ask you… Do you know whether I’m going to get some sort of schedule? Or at least a brief update on what the prince has learned before?”
Dominick took a deep breath, thinking, “Ooh, I don’t know I’m afraid. That would be up to either master Kwan, or the crown prince himself. I don’t go over that, and they didn’t hand me anything for you, so…”
You nodded “Alright, thanks.”
He laughed “Master Kwan is busy now, but don’t worry that’s gonna be over the day after tomorrow.”
You chuckled with him “We’ll see. I got the feeling he isn’t really the type to… relax.”
He gasped dramatically, “I’ve been saying he’s due for a spa day! But he doesn’t agree.”
You paid good attention to the way you walked, hoping you could walk it yourself some day. It was complicated though, you were surprised he could find his way through the maze that were the hallways.
You stopped in front of a wide hall, it looked a bit fancier than the rest of the hallways. More expensive paintings, bigger plants, and even more gorgeous chandeliers.
“We’re stopping here real quick, because I’m supposed to tell you you’re not allowed here. These are the royal quarters, and as a member of staff, you’re only allowed here with an okay from the queen herself.”
You looked from him, back to the hall. It felt weird, knowing how close you were to the prince. You never imagined being here, so close to the bedrooms of the royal families.
“Anyway,” Dominick turned around again, “We’re almost there.”
After you walked back a little bit, Dominick knocked on a door.
“Yes.” a voice from the other side said.
He pushed the door open, revealing a charming room. It wasn’t super big, but it wasn’t particularly small either. One wall was a bookcase, filled with all kinds of books. On a little cabinet, there was a decorative earth boll together with maps, and other kinds of miscellaneous things to learn from. Most of the room was taken in by a big table, however. Multiple chairs surrounded it, two of them were occupied at this moment. By the young prince, and his brother, crown prince Jihoon.
The moment prince Jihoon and your eyes met he realised who you were, the girl he bumped into this morning. He stood up, his hand on his brother's shoulder.
"You must be the new teacher." He didn't ask it, it was more of a statement.
You bowed, "Yes, your highness."
He didn't say anything else, just sighed and whispered some sort of goodbye to his brother before walking to the door. He stopped right in front of you, way too close. Just looked at you a little while before walking away.
"Hello little highness." Dominick greeted prince Minyun.
The prince smiled "Hey Dominick, are you here to play?"
Dominick laughed "Not today, highness. I'm here to bring someone to you, but we can play this weekend."
The young prince sighed "But that's two more days!"
Dominick nodded "That is true, yes. But you have to learn things today. Anyway, I have to go."
He bowed to the prince and winked at you before walking out.
You turned to the prince, who was inspecting you with his eyes, and bowed, "It's a pleasure to meet you, your highness."
The prince sighed "I don't want to learn things…"
You chuckled, you couldn't count all the children who had told you that before. And you always had the same response.
"But then you won't know anything, and you need to learn for your future."
He pouted "But the future is so far away. Can't I learn later? I want to play now."
You say down in the chair beside him, still warm from when his brother sat there, "What if we learn now, and play later? We can always make learning fun."
He looked up at you, frowning "You can?"
You nodded "Sure! We can turn learning into games. But today, since it's our first lesson and we have such little time, I thought we could get to know each other. So tell me, what do you like to do? What's your least favorite thing to do? What are your favorite and least favorite subjects? What would you like to learn?"
His nose scrunched up as he thought. You got your notebook to write everything he'd say down.
"I like playing outside. Oh, and the piano, the teacher before you started teaching me how to play and I really like it. I don't like maths and cleaning my room. The cleaning people are supposed to do that for me but my mom says doing it myself will teach me discipline. But it sucks. My favorite subject is art and music and I hate maths."
You smiled as you wrote down what he just told you, smiled to yourself “I’m guessing you don’t really like maths, your highness.”
He shook his head, making a disgusted face.
“See, now I can keep that in mind in future lessons.” You tapped your notebook with your pen and smiled up at the little prince.
He was quite a lot younger than his brother, but you could see such a resemblance. Their eyes were almost identical, though prince Jihoon’s eyes stood a lot sterner. It was clear they were brothers, just by looking at them.
“So… Now you won’t teach me maths?” he glanced at you from the side, his expression made you laugh.
“I’m sorry, your highness, I’m afraid I have to teach you maths.”
That made him pout.
“But, before we start anything, let’s introduce ourselves. Have you been taught how to introduce yourself in a polite and formal manner?” You got up, and he followed your example.
“Yes, I have! Do you want to see?” He smiled excitedly.
“Please, highness.”
He cleared his throat and straightened his face, he looked adorable, trying to seem formal.
“How do you do, fair maiden? I am prince Minyun Lee, second prince of Aphate. It is an honor to make you acqainktents.” He took your hand, and kissed the top of it.
You chuckled, “Very good, I think…” This is not how you learned to formally introduce yourself, “I just think you meant: ‘It is an honor to make your acquaintance.’ But, that is a very difficult word.”
He nodded, pouting again “It is! Being a formal prince is very hard.”
“I can imagine, highness.” you made an extra serious face.
“Now you respond back to me.” He pointed his finger in a stern and commanding way.
You curtsied “As you wish, your majesty.”
You cleared your throat in a similar fashion as he did before his introduction, “The honor is mine, your highness, royal prince Minyun.” and proceeded it with your name, as you bowed deeply.
He started laughing loudly, holding his belly, “That sounds so funny! You speak funny!”
You laughed too, his laugh was very infectious.
“Who taught you to introduce yourself like that?” you asked, still laughing.
“Dominick, he’s my friend.”
Of course. That explained a lot.
The both of you sat down again, and strangely enough your mind immediately calmed down a little bit. You were glad the prince seemed to like you already, you hadn’t realised it, but apparently you had been worried about that.
“So, prince Minyun. What might I call you? Is ‘prince Minyun’ okay? Or would you perhaps prever ‘your highness’? Or something else?” you figure with this, asking him would be the best way to go. He was seven, even if this question was considered rude to ask a royal, he wouldn’t know that. And you wanted to make sure he was comfortable with what you called him.
His hand went to his chin, in a similar way you had seen prince Jihoon do yesterday, as he thought about that.
“Hm, I guess ‘prince Minyun’ is fine. But…” he sighed, clearly thinking hard, “Dominick calls me ‘little highness’ and I like him saying that, I don’t know if I’d like you saying that. But I like you, so… maybe…”
You nodded understandingly, getting the dilemma, “Maybe I should try calling you that once, and you can see if you like it or not?”
His nose scrunched as he nodded “Yeah… that sounds like a good idea.”
You sat up, straightening your back and clearing your throat, knowing this was important to him, and wanting to show you you respected that, “Little highness.”
He turned his eyes up, thinking about it, “Can… can you maybe say it again, but a little bit slower?”
“Sure.” you suppressed an adoring smile, “Little highness…”
He nodded, still a very thoughtful look on face, “Yes… I like it.”
That made you smile, “Good, then from now on I will call you ‘little highness’, too.”
He nodded again, smiling brightly this time.
You took your notebook and pen in hand again, realising work still had to be done. You were enjoying your bonding time with the little prince, but school was the whole reason why you were here. Maybe you could spend some fun time with him during the weekend, you caught on that Dominick sometimes hung out with the prince, maybe you could join them some time.
“Let’s continue, little highness.”
He let his shoulders hang, but you could still see a smile on his lips “Alright…”
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You had continued asking him questions for a while now, you had nothing prepared so you just made them up as you went along, but you had learned an awful lot about prince Minyun so far. One thing you learned was that he really loved, and looked up to, his brother. He also really loved learning the piano, which, since his previous teacher had left, prince Jihoon had been helping him with.
You also learned, the boy had a very limited concentration span. But you knew you could work with that. In the past, you’d had many children who just couldn’t pay attention for too long. Sometimes you’d wished you could give them lessons one on one, knowing that would help them in their learning process. But since you couldn’t, you had to find other ways around it. And you had found many. All that was left now, well, in the span of the next few weeks, was to find out which were good for the prince and which weren’t.
After a while, you realised you’d really been asking him things for too long, his head was laying on the table, and he was picking at his nails in a bored manner.
So you put down your pen, and turned to directly face him, “Alright, that was it little highness.”
He lifted his head, looking hopeful, “Really?”
You nodded “Yep, on my part at least.”
He frowned, but you had him interested again.
“You see, I’ve now learned so much about you, but you still don’t know anything about me. So, would you like to ask me questions? Now’s your chance, highness.”
That got him very excited, he sat up straight again, “Okay!”
“Shoot.”
“What is your favorite class?”
That was an easy one, “I love biology, it’s always been my favorite.”
Especially the chapters about behavior, not only did that teach you about animals, it made you understand more about human behavior, too. It helped you a lot in your work as a teacher.
“Biology, really? Ew.”
You gasped dramatically “What ‘ew’? Why is it ‘ew’?”
He frowned “Biology is about all kinds of yucky things like blood and broken bones and stuff.”
“Well, you got a point.”
“Yes. I do.”
That made you chuckle.
“Next question,” It was so funny to you, how seriously he took this, “What is your least favorite class?”
You were expecting this one. You widened your eyes, looking around you as if it were a secret, bowed yourself more to him and whispered: “Maths.”
That made him gasp really loudly, “Maths is so dumb, right?”
You nodded, agreeing with him, “Yes it is.”
“So… what if we just don’t do it?”
That made you want to smile, but you kept it in and clicked your tongue, “I’m afraid we can’t, little highness. It is an unmissable part of your curriculum.”
He frowned “Cur… crruri… Curri… What?”
“It’s something you have to learn in school. Sometimes we don’t want to do things, but we still have to do them. And math is one of them.”
“That’s too bad.”
“Next question?”
He nodded, looking away, suddenly seeming a bit nervous.
“Do you know about the party tonight?” he asked softly.
You nodded, “Yes I do, little highness, it’s your first party, right?”
He nodded again, “Yes. Will you be my date?”
It took a while for that question to sink in. You blinked twice, very slowly.
"Excuse me, what?" You chuckled nervously, not at all sure what to react. Not even sure if he meant it.
"My date." He said matter of factly.
You frowned "What do you mean with 'date', little highness?"
You wanted to know what he meant, maybe he thought it meant something else.
He frowned, thinking hard about how to answer that.
"Well… I don't know how to explain it but I want you to come with me to the party."
You didn't know how to respond to that. Were you even allowed to go? You couldn't just say no and hurt his feelings either…
"At first I wanted to ask Dominick, but then I met you and now I want you to go with me."
"I'm honored, prince Minyun, and I would love to go with you… but I don't know if I'm allowed to… I wasn't invited, and I'm not of an important status..."
He frowned "Are teachers not important?"
"No, no! Teachers are very important." You hurriedly said before he had the chance to consider if education was important, "I mean that I'm not royalty."
He nodded understandingly "But… I'm inviting you. Everyone is taking a date!I don't want to be the only person to not have a date!"
"I'm sure you wouldn't be the only one without a date."
He crossed his arms and pouted angrily "I'm the brother of the birthday boy, I can't show up without a date."
Was that true? Some sort of rule you didn't know about? Oh, why was this today out of all days? You hadn't at all gotten used to anything and you had no clue how anything worked around here. Yes, you were here to please the little prince, but you couldn't just go to a fancy party like that, right?
Then again, you were technically invited by a prince. Wouldn't that count as a formal invitation? You wished you could ask someone else.
He looked up at you, with massive puppy eyes "Please?"
Working with children of his age for years now, had made you immune to the effect that puppy eyes had. After all, every child uses them.
But these were different. Maybe it was just because he was the only child in your class, maybe he was just extra cute, but something about them made it impossible for you to say no.
You smiled kindly "Alright, your majesty, if that is what you want, I will accompany you to the party tonight."
You remembered packing your prom dress before coming here. It seemed kind of strange at the time, but you figured that since you were going to the castle, you might need formal wear for something. That thought didn't seem so silly anymore.
Your answer completely lit up his eyes, a bright smile forming on his face just as the door of the room opened.
"Your highness, I am here to escort you back to your room." A woman you didn't know, but was clearly from the staff, said.
Prince Minyun got up and bowed to you, "I will pick you up at a quarter to eight."
You nodded, "I'm looking forward to it, little highness."
As he walked out the door, you got up and curtsied to him. All the while thinking how fast the time had flown by, and how extremely weird the idea of you going to a royal ball was.
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Masterlist | SVT Masterlist | CH Masterlist
Pt.1 | Pt.2 | Pt.3 | Pt.4
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forasecondtherewedwon · 4 years ago
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Hi! First of all, THANK YOU for your perfect Beth/Benny fanfiction. I love them so much!!!! If it's possible, did you think you could do a drabble with a modern AU? Maybe a coffeeshop or wrong number could be interesting with them ♡
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Shaibel’s
Pairing: Beth Harmon/Benny Watts Rating: T Chapter Count: 6/6
1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6
Summary: Beth Harmon is almost the only person who plays chess at Mr. Shaibel's boardgame café, so when she comes in one afternoon to see a chessboard left out on a table, she's curious. When she realizes the half-played game covering its surface is staggeringly, beautifully complex, she's transfixed. She needs to know who started this game, and if they'll be back to finish it.
When the proprietor feels his unassuming coffee dive and chess den needs a refresh to keep up with the times, he asks his employees, Matt and Mike, for their youthful suggestions. The twins have been working there since high school and their affection for the shop is part of what caused them to attend college locally—they were able to stay on parttime. Now graduates, they still take on a few weekend and weeknight shifts in order to stay in touch with the place. Whenever they come in, they show their ideas for logos, paint colours, and social media banners to the boss, shaking their heads and smiling when he inevitably agrees to every idea, trusting them with the changes.
Well, those changes go ahead. There are fresh aprons for the staff members the proprietor tries his best to now refer to as ‘baristas,’ a wide array of boardgames (bought cheap, from vintage and second-hand stores) added to the chess sets, and a punny new name on the sign outside. Nevertheless, the shop’s regulars continue to call it the same thing they always have: Shaibel’s.
Beth Harmon isn’t so much a Shaibel’s regular as a Shaibel’s graduate. The proprietor, William, has never taught lessons—he’s no more open to offering instruction on the Sicilian Defence than on how to win a bidding war in Monopoly—except to her. She became his pupil when she first requested (demanded) to learn and retained that status through frequent follow-up visits, during which the ratio of chess pieces moved to words spoken by Mr. Shaibel held at around a hundred-to-one. Now working on her Bachelor’s in mathematics, Beth, like the twins, continues to drop by. One game turns into however many she can coax out of her former teacher. If he isn’t there, she’ll play Mike or Matt, but she doesn’t venture beyond those opponents. Chess is her break from the looser, more harrowing world of math. She likes coming home to her 64 squares and she likes doing it with a friendly face across the table.
Today, Beth walks in and notices something very disturbing while she’s waiting at the counter for her latte: someone’s left a chessboard out. No point asking the café side of the shop about it. They comprise the recent hires, the flakes, the temporaries. The loyal blood-sweat-and-tears staff handle the games. Frowning, Beth swipes away from Cleo’s Instagram (she’s a model and she’s gorgeous and… should Beth get bangs again?), slips her phone into the back pocket of her jeans, and grabs her mug straight from the barista’s hand as he proffers it. A to-go cup? Please. Not for Beth Harmon, not at Shaibel’s. When she comes in, it’s always for a game and a visit. Today, it’s those plus this mystery.
“Mike,” she calls. “Mike!”
She’s here at the wrong time. The right time to see the place busy, but the wrong time for not having to fight for her friend’s attention. The rebranding made Shaibel’s bizarrely trendy and many of the tables are occupied by coffee-drinkers and boardgame-players alike. She eyes a sloping Jenga tower nervously as she skirts around to grab her friend’s arm and rescue him from where he’s explaining Clue for at least the third time, judging by the tension of his arms, hands shoved in his pockets.
“Hey, what’s up the with chessboard?”
He turns and smiles in relief.
“Someone’s been playing.”
Beth blinks slowly and sips her coffee.
“I know, I know,” Mike hedges. “Obvious. But it wasn’t us!”
“But we’re the only ones who use the boards. I’m sure because whenever I haven’t been here in a while, I have to wipe the dust off.”
“Thanks a lot. Are you saying I’m a lazy employee?”
“I was under the impression that you and Matt picked up the slack from the less reverential members of the staff.” She pauses. “Where is Matt? Don’t you guys usually work the same shift?”
Her friend smiles.
“He’s in the bathroom trying to wash a coffee stain out of his shirt.” At Beth’s raised eyebrows, Mike elaborates. “He keeps trying to pick up the new barista and he caught her by surprise today.”
“So she threw coffee at him?”
“No, she just bumped into him.”
“Anticlimactic,” Beth decides.
“Tell that to Matt’s shirt.”
“But… about the chessboard?”
Mike nods and motions her towards that table, which happens to be empty. She figures people must assume someone’s coming back to finish their game. They sit. Doing a doubletake of the position of the pieces as they’ve been left, she wishes someone were coming back to finish it. She’d like to see who belongs to this setup. Whoever it is feels very nonchalant about allowing their bishop to be blocked from immediate usefulness and very confident in their pawns; these have been marched into extremely ambitious placement. The player is obviously either a genius or an amateur who’s misunderstood the value of the various pieces. Beth twists her mug on the table and shifts her gaze back to her friend.
“One guy,” he says.
“One guy played black and white?”
“Yeah. One great player.”
“At least I don’t have to worry that there are two of them lurking around here, pouncing on the chessboards when I’m not around,” Beth says wryly. “Who was this guy?”
“Thin guy. Blond. He got his coffee before he did all this—” Mike gestures to the stunner on the board between them. “—or else I would’ve listened for the name they called out.”
“And did you seem him do this?” She taps the board with her finger.
“Nah.”
She throws herself back in her chair with a sigh. Then, she remembers her coffee and her hand shoots out; she takes a quick gulp. Perfect, now she’ll be even more wired than she already is. Good thing it isn’t an espresso.
“I knew you’d ask,” Mike says sympathetically. “I wish I had something to tell you, but it was yesterday, Saturday. Busy. He was lucky to get a table.”
“You left this here since yesterday?”
“You already bullied me once for not dusting,” he reminds her. “I couldn’t just pack the set up. I mean it’s…”
“It’s fucking Vermeer,” Beth agrees with Mike’s expression of adoration.
They stare at the layout so long that Matt comes out with the brown splotch on his shirt. She waves him off, concentrating on the board, banishing him with the mumbled suggestion of calling her mother. Alma will know how to get the coffee stain out. She’s great with old-fashioned tricks like that. She’s great at fixing things and can tune her own piano, but, to her daughter’s perennial amusement, still struggles with Twitter. Beth assures her mother that she’s better off. Alma’s therapist agrees. No need to prod the corpse of her former depression by leaving her to mingle with the biggest bunch of assholes on the internet.
“Do you think he’ll come back?” She tries to ask casually, but Mike’s leaning forward with an eager look on his face.
“I mean, he’s got to, right? He left it out. He’s gotta finish.” Distantly, she hears Mike speak some more, but he doesn’t catch her attention again until, “Beth?”
She’s been staring at the board. Fixedly. Fingers intertwined and propping her chin up. She doesn’t know this guy, but she can’t just walk away for the game he’s laid out. Because he started the game, she moves black.
“You’re playing him?” Mike asks excitedly.
Beth shrugs—casually, just one shoulder—before sitting back again and cupping her mug in both hands, still studying the board. Her friend scrapes his chair away from the table and bounds over to his brother.
“Matt!” she hears him say. “Beth’s gonna play him!”
More than that, she thinks, swallowing the end of her latte and tucking a tip beneath the mug. Beth’s gonna win.
Continued on AO3!
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mkstrigidae · 4 years ago
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This might be a lot since there’s so many characters in APWH, but could you share something secret about each character that no one else knows or maybe just a fun fact?
I am so sorry I’m answering this so late- I try not to be a human disaster, but inevitably end up being one most days.
Oooooooh this one is very interesting- they might not all be secrets, because for some characters, that would be giving away major plot points, but fun facts I can do! Let’s see what I’ve got (below the cut):
Robb: Has definitely licked a bone on a dare before, is actually a decent artist (much like Sansa) and does a fair amount of sketching in the field, and has an engagement ring for Tal in his work locker that no one knows about yet :) Inherited Catelyn’s ability for leadership, and is really good at dealing with Logistics, management, and the bureaucracy involved in his job. Hangs out with the experimental archeology students a lot (he’s like the accidental older brother for half the department) and would definitely wear handmade linen armor from someone’s project and let an undergrad shoot arrows at him to test it. (For those of you unaware, linen armor is next to impossible to cut without an extremely specific and sharp type of electric saw). Is good friends with Sarella, who’s going through grad school in Oldtown as well. Has been reluctantly dragged into the feud between the archaeology/anthropology and paleontology departments.
Aegon: is a fairly talented piano player, has always liked to cook, but got really good at it when he was dating an adjunct professor in grad school (none of his family knows about the relationship, but Theon does). Has been taking night classes recently to try and learn the Old Tongue bc he and Lyanna are particularly close. Dates casually, and volunteers at a community center for at-risk kids in Kings Landing on weekends. Is the only Targ sibling emotionally aware enough to spend time with Viserys, and is his grandmother Rhaella’s favorite.  
Rhae: Actually really likes listening to heavy metal, especially when she’s working, and is really into the Westerosi equivalent of late night comedy. Will get really invested in hobbies for like, a few months and then move on to something completely different. Is her grandfather Aerys’ favorite, and has him wrapped around her finger. Makes a game of antagonizing Viserys at Targ family functions, and has been inseparable from Margaery since they met in college. Thought her cousin Obara was the coolest person in the world when she was a kid. Most likely of all the characters to do a triathlon without breaking a nail.
Bran: Might be one sociology class away from identifying as an anarchist. Kind of wants to be a professor and will probably write novels someday. Is really into flea markets and will go antiquing with Ned and Elia and sometimes Cat. Loves kayaking and decorates his wheelchair elaborately for holidays. He’s won several costume contests at school for it. Very snarky. If Sansa had been raised by the starks, they would have had a standing Saturday lunch date to snark and gossip about the rest of the fam.
Jon: wanted to be a forest ranger for the longest time and then a writer, but felt like he had to choose a more reputable career, and is kind of jealous that Robb decided to say ‘fuck it’ and become an archaeologist. Really wants to travel, although he picked law after His Valyrian is passable (the targ sibs spoke it anytime they were with Rhaegar and fam), but he speaks Rhoynish fluently and is close to his cousins on the Martell side of the family. Really likes hiking and will often go with Cat, who is also fairly outdoorsy. Likes epic high fantasy novels and would really love LOTR.
Mya: is weirdly into dream interpretation, is bisexual, and has fallen into one of the canals in Braavos before on a school field trip. She was born in the Vale, and her mom moved to Braavos when she was five. Would definitely eat a bug on a dare. More tomboy than anything, but really enjoys getting dressed up and being feminine. Likes painting her nails fun colors. Who gives a shit about gender expectations? Not Mya.
Sansa: the first person she kisses in APWH isn’t going to be Jon…;) If she’d been raised by the Starks, she might have gone to school for journalism or become a novelist. Hates math, but is a passable accountant because of what Baelish taught her to help him with the books for his restaurants. Doesn’t like to ever wear her hair down, and has a collection of decorative bobby pins for updos that she’s acquired from flea markets in Braavos. Really loves to swim. Pushed the boy who knocked Mya into the canal in after her, but none of the teachers believe him when he accuses her, because it’s sweet, kind, well-behaved Sansa.
Robin: Secretly likes to listen to musicals and is a fairly good singer. In a group chat with Doree and Loree who are drastically improving his social skills and the three of them are parent-trap level plotting. Really dislikes doctors and hospitals. Used to ask Sansa to draw birds for him a lot when he was younger and still has most of them.
Rickon: is actually better with computers and smarter than anyone realizes, because he’s such a jock on the surface. Very used to going with the flow and adapting to change. His favorite classes are chemistry and bio, but he doesn’t really like writing. Is really popular and well-liked among his classmates, but can have a temper when he thinks an injustice is occurring. Is generally just good with animals.
Catelyn: Grew up going hunting with her uncle and always had a stronger stomach for it than Lysa and Edmure did. Is half-estranged from her father because of a disagreement they had regarding Catelyn’s inability to move on after the kidnapping, and a tense relationship with her brother after he married Roslyn Frey (The Freys were vocal supporters of Roose Bolton’s politics and had a hand in publicizing the rumors about the Starks being responsible for Sansa’s disappearance- Walder Frey owns several prominent southern newspapers), but they’re working on mending fences. Takes fairly long walks outside regularly, and would be a bruce springsteen fan. The most intimidating of the entire family.
Arya: Went through a true crime phase. Really enjoys learning languages, her favorite classes this past semester were her Ancient Ghiscari course and her global politics seminar, because they got to debate current issues every week. Like Sansa, she really likes people-watching. Will probably end up at the Olympics for fencing at some point, but was also a sprinter in high school on the track team.
Ned: Probably dropped acid at least once in college. Really enjoys skiing. Learned how to play the guitar as a part of his midlife crisis. Met Cat after she went on two dates with his brother Brandon and they decided they were better as friends. Brandon brought her to a party, and Ned ended up giving her a ride home after his brother found another girl to chat up. They quickly found out that they had a lot in common, and she got along famously with his mother, who Ned was extremely close to. Has a serious sweet tooth
Elia: Likes to paint, but doesn’t think she’s very good at it. Grew up speaking Rhoynish with her family, and taught it to the kids. Has forgotten more about art than most people will ever know, and is extremely efficient when set loose in a flea market. Really likes theater and ballet, and took ballet classes through college.
Lyanna: is working on a book about money in Westerosi politics that’s tied into her current investigation of the Boltons, but only Elia knows about it. Grew up far north, and her first language was the Old tongue rather than Andali, but didn’t want her kids picking it up, because the accent is stigmatized. Keeps notes for her articles in the Old Tongue to keep her nosy kids from reading them.
Theon: Is doing a psychiatry residency in King’s Landing currently. Does a fair amount of biking, and 100% does a polar bear swim in the ocean every winter (Aegon always shows up to cheer him on and they go out for drinks afterwards- his girlfriend, Jeyne, thinks this is insane). Refuses to eat blue foods and was actually a decent French horn player in high school.
Thank you- this was a fun one!! :)
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ssatoritendou · 4 years ago
Text
Blueberry Eyes
Pairing: kageyama/reader
Kageyama Tobio 
Word count: 4.2k
+ summary: You and your soulmate are connected by listening to music. 
Genre: fluff; soulmates 
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To say he found it annoying was an understatement. How can someone listen to the same song over and over again? Stupid soulmate. That’s what Kageyama thought. He didn’t have time for a soulmate. He has one focus and his one love Volleyball. But he could say this about his soulmate. She listened to the playlist in exact order every day at the same time. It kept him on a time schedule surprisingly. Sometimes she went a little off base in the afternoon, sometimes listening to classical piano pieces and sometimes white noise.
Right now he was practicing sets against the wall at lunch waiting for Hinata to come over to yell at him excitedly to set to him. Which he would end up ultimately doing. When all of a sudden strong guitar rift came into his head causing him to set the ball higher than expected leading it to hit him in the face. “Kageyama what happened? You messed up. You never messed up.” “Idiot. Stupid idiot, she is not on a schedule. And this song isn’t even on her playlist.” “Maybe it’s a song she listens to when she is upset,” Hinata suggested. Kageyama didn’t like the feeling that his soulmate could be upset. But what could he do, he didn’t know you. “I don’t care if she is upset! It’s really annoying that she is listening to songs not on schedule and not the regular ones. It throws me off my game. And you don’t want me off my game if you want perfect sets Hinata.” “I think you need to be more appreciative of your soulmate bond. It’s amazing that you are able to hear the music she listens to. It gives you an insight into her personality. I just have my soulmates' first words to me and all I know is that I’ll know who it is when I meet them. I guess for you it could be anyone with headphones on. And why are you assuming the gender of your soulmate for all you know it could be Tsukishima with all the times he is wearing headphones.” Hinata said with an evil smile on his face. “Baka it’s not Tsukishima he doesn’t listen to music on a schedule and he doesn’t listen to this type of music that is for sure.”
“HEY! HEY! HEY!” You heard come from your owl-headed captain while he was reading a volleyball magazine. “Keiji does he always have to yell like that inside?” You asked your older brother. He exhaled and shook his head, “Settle down Bokuto, we are inside.” Bokuto frowned and his hair frowning with his face. “Akaashi, ____ you won’t believe it I’m one of the topped 5 ranked Aces in the nation. See!” He pointed to the magazine with a great picture of him spiking. “Weren’t you in the top 3 the last time we went to nationals?” “Akaashi!” He bit back your brother. “You are in the top 5 that’s all that matters.” You said with a smile. “It’s a positive thing. Universities with strong volleyball programs will see this and definitely want you on their team. As long as you eat healthily and improve your technique.” “Thanks, little Akashi.” You hated that nickname he had given you “Bokuto don’t call me that. Shouldn’t you be studying if you want to go to the training camp next month?” “Don’t you guys want to help me?” He said, turning to you and Keiji. “I’m a first-year Bokuto. I have no clue what you are learning about.” “I have my own finals to worry about so that I can play as well. ___ here is just a manager in training. She doesn’t even have to go. I'm sure she would rather stay home anyway.” “Not true. I would like to know everything about the teams playing style considering we will be playing against them in the future.” “There you go _____. You know Kuroo told me about this amazing combo team from the Miyagi Prefecture. Fast spikes. But I’m sure he is over exaggerating. They were invited to the training camp.” You were able to get Bokuto to calm down. Maybe that was your gift as an Akaashi, being able to calm down the Owl-Headed captain, just like your brother. You were able to get him to talk about volleyball with Akaashi while you put in your headphones. You were listening to some Beethoven pieces to keep you focused. You put your phone to your side and started working on some of your math work. Sometimes your mind wandered to soulmate connections. Most girls your age would tell and squeal about their connection. But you had no clue what your connection was. It bothered you a little bit. Akaashi was lucky he had a tattoo of a timer of when he was going to meet his soulmate. He wouldn’t tell you the exact timing of the timer. You never had any strange markings or any sort of sign. It worried you. Were you destined to be alone? But dwelling on things that shouldn’t make you worried won’t do you any good. You had a plan for your life and the universe will work things out for you. As you are working on the homework your music was changed to a rock song. You yanked the headphones out and Konoha was laughing. “Don’t do that you jerk.” You pushed him.
Kageyama was going for his morning run. He put his headphones in not like he needed the music he had his soulmate's morning playlist playing. “Tobio dear I made eggs and toast. Where are you going?” “Out for a run Mom, I’ll be back in 20 minutes.” He said after finishing tying his shoelace. He began running around his neighborhood. He noticed the music was barely playing a faint, low noise of the start of techno piano, he thinks it is Korean pop. But he could barely hear it; he heard the pumping of his heart louder. He decided to take a stretching break and put on his own music. His sister made him a playlist to keep him pumped while running. He was a little ashamed of admitting it but he enjoyed Ariana Grande. He put on her new song and continued his run.
Yes, the finals were finally over but in the midst of immense studying, you had gotten sick. A chest cold you would have gone to school but your mother insisted that you stay home for the day. You put on your music at a low volume. You had NCT U’s light bulb playing in your ear as you were falling back to sleep in the early morning as Keiji the adjoining bathroom was brushing his teeth. The cough syrup finally kicks in and making you feel sleepy. That's when you swear that your song had changed to Ariana Grande’s Positions. When you look down and your screen still said NCT—Light Bulb with the volume not even passing the rewind icon. “Keiji!” He emerged from the bathroom toothbrush in his mouth shrugging at your loudness so early. “I can’t hear the song that is playing in my headphones instead it’s playing Ariana Grande. Can you hear it?” You handed him the headphone. He spat the toothpaste in the sink and came to sit on your bed placing the headphone in his ear. Instead of hearing the very powerful female vocalist, he heard the rap section of the song you were listening to. “I do not hear Ariana Grande, I just hear the Korean Rap.” You flopped your head down on the pillow. “Is this cold medicine making me go crazy?” Keiji laughed at your dramatics. “You know some soulmate connections are connected to what you listen to.” He smirked leaving your room. “Well, I’m off to school text me if you need anything.” Your eyes were wide open with shock. You listen to music all the time. All the time. Based on times of day, feelings and emotions, and tasks. This is the first time you heard your soulmate's music or whatever they were listening to. Or maybe your music was always too low for you to hear what they were listening to. But if that’s true based on this experience that means the volume was too loud for them to hear their own music. You had forced your music preferences onto someone else which is a horrible thing to do. You must be so annoying to this person. Listening to music all the damn time. And they have to listen to it. You quickly pulled the covers over your head hoping to fall apart.
The rest of the morning the person whoever they are were playing pumped-up songs. You assumed they were happy about something or possibly working out. After Akaashi requested your help with songs for his workout routine you were well versed in the subject. They played them until about 8:50 which is when a majority of when classes start in high school. That was a plus you knew this person was in high school.
Kageyama has had 2 off days now in the past 2 months. The one where his soulmate changed the song they were listening to and messed with his practicing of setting to himself. 2 today when his soulmate didn’t listen to any music at all. Today was the day he got back his final grades. He did overall well except for one that didn’t even graze the passing mark. How the hell was he going to get to Tokyo now? He wanted to play Nekoma. He wanted to face that setter that got along with Hinata again. He wanted to play those other Tokyo teams. Some have been to nationals and he wants to beat them and let them know that he is better than them. When it came to practice time and they were in the club room, Hinata had failed one test too. He and the orange were seething that they were not able to go. “Hey, you two only failed one test right? So just take the supplementary lessons in the morning and don’t worry I got you a ride to Tokyo. You’ll be there in no time.” Tanaka said with an evil smile.
Summer has finally approached. With that comes a lot of training for the volleyball team. But these camps were more than just training. It was about building relationships with teams and other players in the same positions as you to pass on techniques. But once it’s game time no one can really beat Bokuto’s spikes. With his strong arms, pure agility, and positive attitude while playing it's hard to keep up with him. Expect when he is shut out then and only then can Akaashi really know what to do to make him feel better. But Bokuto is also not your team's strongest link; everyone else is very strong as well.
You were filling water bottles up when Kuroo tapped your shoulder. “____ this is the Manager and Junior Manager of the Karasuno team from Miyagi.” “Oh, you mean the wonder-team. The ones with the crazy spike attacks. Bokuto was talking about this for months. Pretty sure Keiji was going to strangle him if he wouldn’t shut up.” You said with a laugh. The oldest bowed, she was quite beautiful. “Hi my name is Kiyoko and this is Yachi.” The smaller one blonde bowed as well and said a quick hello. You bowed back and said, “It is nice to meet you. I’m ___ as Kuroo said. And I’m a manager at Fukurodani. I’ll show you around and where you and where your team will be sleeping.” You were given the job of showing the new managers where they would be because you drew the shortest straw of the managers. It didn’t bother you as much. “Since we are in a school we are staying in classrooms that’s why the form said sleeping bags are required. So the girl managers are sleeping in room 119. And based on the map I was given Karasuno will be staying on the opposite side of the building in 160. And the coaches are staying right in between 140-142. Why don’t you two set up your spots here? And then I’ll help you with the other bags if you need them for your other rooms.” You said looking up from your paper. “Thank you again. But don’t worry about the bags the boys will bring in their own. Yachi do you mind putting my bag in there while I tell the coach about the sleeping arrangements.” “U-uh yes, Kiyoko,” Yachi said nervously. The tall older dark-haired female left the room. “Are you a first-year by chance? There aren’t a lot of first-years well none, managers and I would very much like to have a friend.” You said to the blonde female. “Yes I am. Yachi Hitoka.” “Akaashi, _________. Pleased to meet you and I hope we can become good friends.”
Yachi and You spent time together when you weren’t with your teams. You found her company enjoyable. She talked about Hinata an orange-haired short but fast spiker and his partner a setter Kageyama who is obsessed with volleyball. She then told you they weren’t the brightest pair and they had to take supplementary lessons but would be arriving shortly. Within an hour the 2 burst through the door panting from running. As soon as the next set for Karasuno’s match started you watched to see what Yachi was talking about. And she was right the little orange one moved so fast and the blueberry setter, set to his exact speed. That was a true pairing.
As soon as the camp started it ended in 2 days. And you were thankful. You enjoyed the rushed yes, but since you were the runt of your Fukurodani manager team and were the servant to everyone. Keiji saw that it was taking a toll on you. You just finished cleaning around the gym when someone bumped into you causing you to drop the floor polish. “Hey watch it blueberry.” You let that slip out by accident slapping your hand on your mouth. When you first saw the setter of the Karasuno team you thought his eyes looked like blueberries and even his hair now that you are closer to him looked like that shade of blue. “What did you say?” He said with anger in his tone. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry. I’m just a little worn out and I tend to get a little crabby when that happens. I know you didn’t mean to bump into me. And that reaction was not warranted.” You bowed and apologized profusely hoping that he would accept. Keiji was walking over when he saw you bent over in front of the young setter. “Uh ___ what is going on here.” “Not now Akaashi.” “What did she do?” Akaashi asked with a sigh in his voice as he pinched the tip of his nose. “She called me blueberry after I did accidentally bump into her causing the polish to fall over.” “Hmm, not her worst reaction.” This caused you to kick your older brother in the ankle. “Wait till I tell mom about this then will see if you get any curry tonight.” You stuck your tongue out in return. “There is one way to settle this then you rambling apologies and making Kageyama uncomfortable. As long as Kageyama doesn’t mind will you help her clean up the polish?” You felt bad for him, how was a first-year going to say no to a second year. Also, your brother putting him in an awkward position to if he said no he would look like a bad guy. But what you and your brother didn’t know that Kageyama had the utmost respect for him. Akaashi was setting for one of the top aces in Japan. He was so lucky. So naturally, he agreed to do so. You were a little shocked. You and he cleaned in silence; it was peaceful. You were humming a little bit. You noticed that Kageyama looked up when you started humming. You stopped right then and there afraid you would freeze to death from his icy glare. Not that you mind though, the none emotionless setter was gorgeous. He did have ridiculously beautiful blueberry eyes and a nice jawline. And his hair looked really soft too, which made him look like a blueberry even more. You finished quickly so you would not hold him up anymore. “I’m sorry again that my brother forced you to help clean.” You apologized bowing to him. “He didn’t force me. I did bump into you, causing you to drop the polish. I’m sorry I wasn’t paying attention, I was lost in my thoughts.” He bowed to you. ‘Also very gentlemanly.’ You thought to yourself. “I understand I do that too sometimes. You played really well for the games you got to play in. You can set to the orange guy perfectly. You match his speed so he can spike it perfectly almost every time when he isn’t blocked by Nekoma.” You said mocking Hinata’s spiking motion.   Kageyama looked down and smiled at you. “I think Fukurodani stumped him a couple of times.” “Well, we do have one of the top 5 aces in Japan. It is bound to happen.” You said with a chuckle walking backward out of the gym. “Hey I was wondering was that song you were humming earlier something by Ariana Grande?” You thought for a minute. Over the course ever since you found your soulmate connection you decided to lesson your time listening to music. You found that the person you were connected to liked Ariana Grande a lot. Maybe it was Positions. “Oh yeah, it was. Sorry if you found that was annoying. Just someone I know really likes that song.” You laughed again. “Come on ___ we got to go!” Bokuto yelled from the bus he was hanging out of the door while your brother was trying to pull him in. “It looks like I have to go. There is supposed to be another training camp soon, maybe your team will invite them too, it was nice talking to you. Yachi has my number if you need another friend.” You grabbed your bag by the entrance of the gym and hopped over to your bus. Kageyama watched you the whole way, his heart fluttering a little bit. When you reached the bus Bokuto was smirking, “Was Little Akaashi flirting with the setter from Karasuno?” “No! I have no idea what you are talking about! And stop calling me that!” You huffed and sat in your seat. You placed your headphones in for a somewhat long drive which you can get some much-needed sleep. You decided to listen to music for once, choosing to listen to Blueberry Eyes. As the bus was finally pulling out Kageyama was looking at the bus and you gave him a little wave and he waved back. “You are blushing.” Bokuto leaned over with a big smile. You pulled his sleep mask down. “Go to sleep you great horned owl.”
As the Manager from Fukurodani gave Kageyama a wave. He waved back. But the reason he was looking at the Fukurodani bus leaving was that he heard the song his soulmate was playing, Blueberry Eyes. He does not believe in coincidences. You just called him blueberry. Worse of all was that he kind of liked you. But not in a romantic way yet. He liked you as a person. You didn’t find volleyball boring, your brother was also a setter, and you were fun to talk to. “Kageyama who are you waving at?!” Hinata yelled at him.   “No one you need to worry about Dumbass!” He yelled back. “He was waving at one of the Fukurodani’s cute managers,” Nishinoya said, smiling. “She seems so sweet and innocent like a pure angel.” Tanaka agreed. “Yeah, she is Akashi's sister,” Suga said. “So I doubt you two will ever get close to her.” The two second-years pouted at their chances with the manager.
The next camp was coming up in a few weeks. Hinata and Kageyama did have a fight and he did frighten Yachi. He felt bad because of the few friends he had; he lost both of them. As much as he hated Hinata, he was able to keep up with Kageyama’s skill and shared the passion for volleyball. Yachi was able to help him with his grade and was a great tutor and she also didn’t find volleyball boring, and she is curious about the sport. He went to her house to apologize. He brought her some cat-shaped cookies (that what his sister told him to do). “You didn’t have to Kageyama.” Yachi was shaking her head feeling guilty that she didn’t do anything for him. “It is an apology for what happened in the gym the other day between Hinata and me. You shouldn’t have seen that and we shouldn’t have let that happen.” “Thank you for the apology. I hope you and Hinata work things out.” She said with a smile. There was silence for a moment before Yachi’s phone dinged. She looked down at it knowing it was you continuing the conversation that you guys started earlier. She laughed at her phone. Kageyama lifted his eyebrow in suspicion. “Sorry, that was ____.” “_____?” “Uh yeah. Fukurodani’s manager, Akaashi’s sister.” “Oh her. I believe she is my soulmate.” With that statement, she almost dropped the box of cookies. “What?!” She squeaked.
“Yachi!” You screamed and leaped into her arms. “____ it had only been 2 weeks.” “But I missed you. I don’t have a lot of girl-friends.” She laughed and hugged you right back. “Come on I’ll show you to your classroom again.” Yachi was not the one for evil plans or devilish plans. But only knowing for a few weeks she knows Kageyama would be a good fit for you. And you for him. So she and he planned for a way to get to know each other. While he focuses on volleyball.
“____ I have to help with setting up for dinner. Can you throw balls for Kageyama? I usually do but-” “Of course Yachi. I’m used to doing it for Akaashi.” You jogged over to Kageyama and he was stretching.“Hi Kageyama, Yachi asked me to throw  balls for you to set is that ok?” “Yes of course. I’m assuming you know how to throw to setters?” “Mmhmm.” You hummed with a nod.
Evenings passed, helping Kageyama with his setting for this move for him and Hinata. After each training session, he would walk you to your room. You got to know him, he was really a simple person, with some anger problems, and a love for volleyball. You also found out you could make him blush easily.
The last day had finally approached. The boys and managers were treated with BBQ. After that, you had to clean the gym. “Want some help again? A way for me to repay you for helping me this week.” Kageyama asked. “Please do.” You said with a sigh. “Thank you.” He shrugged happily helping you. “You and Hinata really improved that move. It looks good I have a feeling you will get to play Seijoh. I’ll be rooting for you.” He was listening to you but also not because he had a plan for you, he was going to confirm his theory that you were in fact his soulmate. He put in his headphones when you weren’t looking, putting it at full volume, and played the song you have been listening to for 2 weeks. Blueberry Eyes. He turned his head and watched you jump and seeing you drop your broom. You looked directly into Kageyama's eyes. He looked at you deadpan, smirking, skipping the song to an Ariana song. You had a cute confused look on your face and made his heart flutter again. He took out his headphones. “You- You, uh… You are my soulmate!” You said flabbergasted. “Yes.” He shrugged. “You knew? For how long?” “2 weeks when you were leaving. You listened to that song. Blueberry Eyes. Normally I would be offended, but the song is very complimentary. You do have good music taste and I like that you were on a schedule. Then you went off it and that did throw me off.” “I’m sorry. When I found out that was my connection which was when I was sick and you were listening to your music. I felt horribly guilty that I was forcing my type of music onto another. And I never wanted to do that to you.” He walked over to you and hugged you to stop you from rambling. “It doesn’t matter to me. You have good music taste. I don’t know what I really liked.” “Ariana Grande.” He blushed and pushed you out of his grasp. “Hey, Baka that is not fair.” He said embarrassed. “Oh, Kageyama it is not that bad.” You laughed. You noticed he was still holding your hand. “I like that you are my soulmate Kageyama.” “And I like you are mine. And I ask for a couple of things. 1. Please call me Tobio, 2. Never change your music taste, and 3. If you can please come to my games.” You blushed at the last request. “Anything for my Blueberry.” You pecked his cheek. His face heated up again. “You can call me Tobio,'' I said. “Blueberry in private please.” “Anything you want.” you agreed.
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deus-ex-knoxina · 5 years ago
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neil josten, music major
so neil has to fulfill a fuckin fine arts requirement. UGH.
he is not a fan of this because it is not exy, it is not practical, it is not useful, it is not related to math he will never need it
but the administration thinks it’s necessary for some fuckin reason, so. he looks over all his options and chooses a music theory class, because out of all of his options it seems like the one least likely to actually make him do art. like, theory. that’s the opposite of practice. right???
but eventually he discovers, as so many disappointed music majors do, that music theory is fULL OF FUCKING MATH. SERIES AND SET THEORY EVERYWHERE. M A T H.
unlike the other people in his class, who are generally either a) music majors or b) non-music majors who are also not math majors and really just wanted to get this GE out of the way, neil is t h r i l l e d
he just happened to stumble on the ONE branch of fine arts, as far as he knows, that actually contains math. so this is like. him just using stuff he learned in math classes two semesters ago. the professor loves him
this is long but tumblr is absolutely refusing to let me put in a read more im so sorry. pretend it was here
(the professor also isn’t quite sure why neil was completely apathetic about the class until she introduced the concept of a harmonic series, since a harmonic series is not a very intellectually exciting topic, but he’s engaged and putting in effort so! not gonna question that too hard!)
and listen, at this point, neil knows his major doesn’t matter. he’s going to be a pro exy player. his classes are just a way of giving him a few extra years to train before he starts looking at contracts.
and he is someone who appreciates intellectual challenges. this is a man who decided to major in math. math. and neil finds the whole concept of music theory interesting, because it’s so... irrelevant to survival? someone invented music, and then later on, someone decided to analyze music, and now it’s a whole ass field of study
he finds himself signing up for another music theory class for the next semester. presumably, it’ll get more complicated as he gets further in. more math.
also, music is something neil can’t quite work out how to conquer yet-- the subjectivity involved, and the understanding of phrasing and rhetoric, is exactly the same stuff he has trouble with in writing. his ear is nowhere near as good as most of the other people in the class, because neil has never been someone who listens to music a lot, if ever.
it’s a challenge. neil josten does not back down from that shit. he tackled learning languages, beat math into submission, and is well on his way to conquering exy. and he’s a little tempted to make music theory his newest victory.
the music theory major doesn’t have a lot of required courses, enough that he could easily switch majors. part of neil rebels at the idea of majoring in something so impractical-- the part of him that still remembers mary’s advice and yells at him for not hiding from cameras.
neil listens to this part of him, and he does what he does best: he tells it to fuck right off. as long as neil plays exy, it doesn’t matter what else he does.
he goes to that music theory I professor and asks her to be his advisor and help him figure out changing his major, and she is still completely mystified but at the same time strangely honored? because her class made this math major who was clearly only taking it for the GE completely change his mind and decide to study music. hELL yeah.
she does warn him that music is a time-intensive major, but neil dismisses that. he’s never really listened to music before. he can start. he doesn’t need to keep his ears open for cars or passerby while he’s out on runs anymore. he can listen to music then, and when he’s doing warmups
he also forces kevin and andrew to listen to the music out loud with him at night practice. they’re not amused but also what are they gonna say?? no?? this is a weird new Phase Of Neil but he’s happy so. they give in.
also the professor was 100% right and neil is swamped for the rest of his time in college, but he’s also not a performance major so that saves him a lot of time because he’s not taking lessons or anything.
and he starts figuring out how piano works. he has to search up some tutorials, but he knows how to read music now, and it’s not a great leap to translate sheet music to a piano. neil’s hands carry a lot of significance to him-- they’re scarred, and they are one of the keys to his success at exy-- but this is the first time he’s ever used them to produce something beautiful.
also, he uses them to produce things that are horrifically ugly. really just the worst noises you can imagine on a piano. because neil is still neil.
he also discovers that kevin is surprisingly good at picking up melodies, because at one point kevin corners him and angrily hums a few bars of a gluck piece before asking what the hell it’s called because it’s been stuck in his head for two days and he can’t get it out
neil desperately tries to get the orange notes to let him compose a new palmetto fight song for them. by the end of his third year, he wears them down.
at the foxes’ first game in neil’s senior year, fifth-year andrew takes one step into the inner court for warmups and says, ‘did you fucking write that?’
he sure did and neil josten is like a proud mama listening to the orange notes play their new fight song.
he yells out some notes during the game. christy is half a beat off for like half of the b section and she’s messing up the other trumpets. he likes the extra flourishes the drum section has added. the backliner marking him is utterly baffled
unsurprisingly, he still finds a way to make his senior thesis about sports
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