#you changed lives that day we heard no control recorded on a phone on speaker

[bewitchedbewilderedbisexual]

do you ever stop whatever you’re doing and just say “no control” in the brazilian leak voice or are you normal?

[ace-in-a-shopping-cart]

Hoodie

A songfic based on Hoodie by Hey Violet.

Word Count: 1,861

CW: food mention, cursing.

Nines’ keys jingled as he opened the door. “Darling, I’m home!”

The only answer he received was a cat coming over for pets. Nines smiled, shrugging off his jacket before scooping the grey-striped animal into his arms and letting her rub against his chin as he walked to the kitchen. Passing by the stereo system, he carefully twisted the knob so soft pop would start playing over the speakers. He set Stalker down and grabbed the food from the cabinet, the only other thing in there being a few bags of thirium neatly leaning against the wall.

He cracked the can open a bit more and heard a noise from down the hall. A few moments later, Levi was entering the room, tail high and expecting food. Nines chuckled, reaching down to pet the all black cat along his spine before putting the food in their bowls.

He scratched between Stalker’s ears before going to sit on the couch. Propping a foot up on the other knee, he picked up a tablet and reviewed a few more files for the day before moving to the novel he’d been reading.

The evening progressed quietly, the cats curling up with him when their meal was finished. Finally, Nines could delay it no longer. While in reality his systems would be fine without the sleep cycle he’d been maintaining for the past year, they needed it to function optimally in the same way humans needed actual sleep.

He stood from the couch and went into the bedroom, changing into sweatpants before gingerly picking up the hoodie that lay across the bed. It was old and faded, the zipper no longer working and cigarette burns littering the cloth. The words ‘Detroit Police Department’ were barely visible anymore. He pulled it close to his face and breathed in deeply. Doing so tricked his processors into slowing down and had his memory banks pulling up a specific file. He slipped the garment on as he let the memory play out, going through the rest of his nightly routine.

Gavin smiled, handing him the bundle of fabric. “I’ll be back before you know it. Hey, take care of this for me, will ya?”

Gavin shrugged off his hoodie before picking up his bag. Nines stood at the door and reached a hand to him when he passed, blocking the path. “Are you sure about this? You don’t have to do it.”

Nines nodded, leaning down to capture his lips in a brief kiss. He tried to put all his emotions into it, arm curling around Gavin’s back and gently holding him, but he never had been very good at that. Gavin kissed him back, a hand coming to rest on Nines’ chest as he leaned into it. He cupped Nines’ cheek when they pulled apart.

“I’ll be fine, don’t worry about me.” He grinned that lopsided cocky grin that Nines couldn’t help but adore, and then he was gone. Whisked away by an unmarked police car to be undercover at a place he might not return from.

Nines pulled back the covers and slid into the bed, letting the sheet fall around him. He breathed in the smell of Gavin around him, the pillowcase that hadn’t been washed since that day but had never been used and the faded hoodie he wore. It made him feel that much closer to the detective. He curled onto his side, Levi coming up to lay next to him. Nines reached out and rubbed his ears, scratching under his chin before letting his sleep cycle activate. He had just enough time to register Stalker coming over to lay on his head before he fell asleep for the night.

He went through the morning in a similar way, making the bed and putting the hoodie and sweatpants back where they were. He took a shower and made sure his hair looked presentable before putting on a black turtleneck and jeans. He went into the living room and gathered up the things he’d need for the day, putting dry food and water in the bowls, before heading to the door, the cats winding around his ankles the whole way. He meticulously tied his shoes before pulling Gavin’s hooded leather jacket off the hook and slipping it on over his shoulders. He nudged the cats with his toe and they wandered off in opposite directions as he left.

He arrived at the precinct and went to his desk, opening the files and getting the routine paperwork done early. Much of his afternoon would be filled with checking in with Gavin, the one time a month he got to speak with him and it was as handler and operative, and doing the paperwork that came with that. He got his paperwork done and began prepping Gavin’s file.

He made a brief stop at the break room to grab a cup of thirium before making his way to the room that housed the secure line they’d use to check in. Nines might not be able to see his face but at least he was going to get to hear his voice and that was enough for him at the moment.

The debriefing went smoothly, Gavin being able to get the full report out and Nines having enough time to relay new instructions to him, finishing with, “You’ll be able to be home within the month if all goes well.”

Gavin chuckled before swearing quietly. “Yeah, babe, don’t worry, I’ll be home soon.” His voice turned sweet, the way it did when he was relaxed at home, but there was a slight edge to it that Nines picked up on. Someone else was in the room with Gavin. 

Nines chuckled back, not sure if they were able to hear him. “That’s good to hear. I’ve really missed you.” He tried to keep his voice light and even but a slight tremor invaded it.

Gavin chuckled low and deep. “Are you taking good care of my hoodie?”

Nines closed his eyes, leaning just a bit more forward as he pressed the phone to his ear. “Yeah, but it’s mine now. If you want it back, you know where to find me.” He let a growl enter his voice. “Come and get it.”

There was a wide smile in Gavin’s voice when he spoke, voice playful. “You can bet I will.” Someone called him, voice muffled along the connection. “Yeah, I’ll be there in a minute, just let me finish this call!” His voice dropped from a shout to almost a purr. “I'll try not to keep you waiting.”

The line dropped dead and Nines opened his eyes, left with an empty room and a secure line. He sighed, stopping the recording of the call and straightening his files. He stood and exited the room, keeping his features schooled and not showing an ounce of emotion.

Connor was waiting at his desk and Nines almost wanted to avoid him. Instead, he sat down in the chair and slipped the files into their drawer. “Can I help you with something, Brother?”

Connor shrugged, leaning against the desk. “It’s more what I can help you with. How are you holding up, Nines?”

Nines shrugged, pulling Gavin’s jacket just a bit closer around himself. “What do you expect me to say? That I’m suffering? That I’m getting on just fine without him? I want him here, Eights. I want him by my side where I can make sure he’s eating right, where he’s not in immediate danger at all hours of the day. I want to curl around him and feel his chest vibrate when he talks. I want him back.” He paused, smoothing out his face and pulling his voice back from the louder edge of a normal conversational voice. “I’m doing fine but I’ll be better when he’s back.”

Connor patted his back before walking away, no comforting words to be said. Nines pulled the hood up, letting it cover his red LED, before connecting with his terminal and entering the conversation into records.

The next week went on as usual, Nines spending his time alone with only Connor, Tina, and the cats for company most times. There was a hole in his life, a hole that wouldn’t heal until Gavin was home. He went through life the best he could, ignoring the fact that the one person he felt most like himself around was out there in an unsafe environment that he couldn’t protect him from. He needed the control of knowing Gavin was safe, more than just the monthly phone call or arrest if they could get away with it.

Another evening of coming home to an empty apartment, of calling out, “Darling, I’m home!”  on reflex as he entered.

A voice chuckled from the kitchen. “I kinda like that one.”

Nines almost dropped his keys in surprise before kicking the door shut and launching himself toward the kitchen. “Gavin?!”

Gavin stood there, Stalker in his arms, and turned to face Nines. “There really isn’t anything in here to eat, is there?”

Nines froze in the doorway, taking in every aspect of Gavin. He looked tired, a scrape across his jaw, and his clothes were rumpled and dirty. Nines had never been so glad to see him. He stepped forward and took the cat from Gavin’s arms, putting her down before pulling Gavin against him. Gavin’s face turned up at him, a smirk on his lips even as his eyes drifted to Nines’. Nines smiled at him. “I’m so glad you’re home.” He bent to kiss him.

Gavin smiled into the kiss, melting against him. It’d been the first time they were in each other’s personal space in two months and the first time they’d kissed in six months. They both savored it, lingering for as long as they could.

Eventually, Gavin pulled back to breathe. He laid his head on Nines’ chest, arms wrapping around him to keep him close. “I missed you.”

Nines dropped a kiss on the top of his head. “I missed you too.”

They stood in their kitchen for a few more minutes before Gavin spoke again. “But seriously, there’s no food in this house and I’m starving.”

Nines chuckled. “Yeah, we can get you some food. What do you want?”

“A burger. I’ve been living off Chinese for the past three months and I’m sick of it.”

Nines nodded against him. “I can get you a burger, that’s no big deal.”

Gavin pulled back enough to look at him, leaning in to kiss him again when one of the cats started yowling. Gavin laughed. “Leviathan Whiskers Reed, that’s not very cash money of you.”

Nines laughed, pulling Gavin in to kiss him again, ignoring the still screaming animal that was now climbing up his leg. Finally, they pulled back and Nines detached Levi from his leg. “Alright, alright. I’m getting you food, calm down you gremlin.”

He fed the cats before herding Gavin toward the door. “Let’s get you a burger.”

Gavin leaned his head against Nines’ shoulder. “That sounds nice. Burger and fries, maybe a shake, before I sleep for a week.”

D:BH Taglist (Check out my masterlist before sending an ask to be added!): Currently, no one is on the taglist.

[spidernerdsblog]

I Forgot That You Existed : Chapter Seven

A/N: Chapter seven is here. An emotional roller coaster this took me some time. Hope you like this chapter. Feedback and suggestions are always welcome.

Pairing : Tom Holland × Singer reader 

Summary : It's been more than five years since you and Tom have gone their own ways after a heartbreaking breakup which had left both of you shattered. Both of you thought that you were finally over with each other and were happy in your respective lives until you meet again at a reunion trip planned by your best friend and you realize you are still not done with each other.

Warnings : pregnancy, miscarriage, angst, molestation.

Mini Playlist : look what you made me do by taylor swift.

And the cat was out of the bag. All these years you have been hiding from the world and Tom that you had conceived. That you were pregnant with his child. Nobody knew about this except your parents, Zendaya, Harrison and Alex. The whole incident had mentally affected you very badly that you went into depression which luckily you were able to recover with the support of your family and friends.

Tom stood there frozen. Your words hit him like a rock. His face was blank, eyes wide in bewilderment.

You looked around to see everyone in a state of shock. You fought back your tears as you ran inside the house rubbing your eyes, shutting the door you collapsed on the floor wailing.  

“Y/N!!” Zendaya and Harrison called out to you.

“Seriously Tom you are such a jerk.” Zendaya spat turning towards Tom then running inside to your aid. Chloe followed her.

Tom felt weak; he felt his legs would give away any minute. Harrison came up to him and put his hand on his shoulder.

“Did you know?” Tom asked weakly

“Tom listen we didn’t think that you will get to know this in such a circumstance” Harrison spoke trying to calm him down

“Don’t bullshit me Harrison!! Did you know about this?!” Tom demanded

“Yeah mate.”

“Why didn't you say anything to me?” Tom was fighting back his tears.

“I tried to tell you but you never listened. And after she lost the baby she made me promise to not tell anyone about this.”

Zendaya and Chloe kept knocking on your door.

“Y/N!! open up dear”

“It's only us Y/N don't do this to yourself.”

The door unlocked as you emerged from behind the door, your face all red, eyes puffy, tears trickling down your cheeks. Zendaya and Chloe got inside and hugged you, tears shimmered in your eyes. They made you sit on the bed and drink a glass of water.

“It's gonna be okay darling” Zendaya rubbed your back comforting you.

“I messed up everything Z” you sniffled

“No Y/N it was not your fault Tom pushed you. You were always trying to avoid any kind of conflict.” Chloe said

“And this thing had to come out some or the other day maybe this was the best time.” Zendaya said.

Six years ago you left London with a broken heart. It wasn’t easy for you to leave behind the person whom you loved with all your heart but little did you know that you were carrying a piece of him with you. After a month in NY your health went terrible; frequent mood swings, morning sickness and nausea was common. You first thought maybe the change of environment is taking a toll on you but when you missed your period you decided to see a gynaecologist. Though you were sure that you used protection the last time you and Tom had sex but you were not on birth control so you couldn't rule out the chances. And there you were one fine morning in the doctor’s chamber

“Hello Miss Y/L/N”

“Hello Dr Ivy”

“I have good news for you. Congratulations you are pregnant.” And your worst fear came true. You gave a tight lipped smile.

“Are you sure?” You asked. The doctor looked at you sceptically

“No I mean is it even possible? Because we used protection” you explained.

“Yes dear, your test reports came positive. And condoms are actually 98% effective sometimes it just happens due to many reasons like if it’s not worn properly or breaking of the material etc. I know you are young and it’s hard for you to make a decision of keeping the baby or not but that’s okay talk to your partner, it isn’t that late you are just six weeks into your pregnancy.”

“Thank you doctor” you gave a smile.

You didn't know what to do, you were just 21 and the whole pregnancy thing was freaking you out. The first person that came in your mind was Tom though you least expected that he would answer still there was a little bit of hope left in you. You tried to contact him but it was in vain. So you called your parents and Harrison to tell the news.

Your parents flew to NY in the earliest flight they could get.

“Honey did you tell Tom?” your mom asked

“He isn't answering me.”

“So have you decided what you’re going to do?” your dad asked

“I don’t know. I’m confused.”

“Jellybean you are too young for this you have a life and a career ahead. You can't nurture a baby and craft your career simultaneously.” Your dad tried to make you understand.

“We think you should go for an abortion.” your mom suggested

“But mom this is our baby. This is the only thing of Tom I have with me, I can’t do this to our baby.” You protested

“I know dear how much you love him, but are you sure he wants to be the father of this child? That is why take your time. It's not that late whatever you decide we are with you.”

Harrison came to visit you a week later. He lied to everyone back at home that he is going for some audition for a role. You were sitting on the couch head leaning on his shoulder. Harrison’s arm was wrapped around your shoulder.

“What are you gonna do Y/N?”

“I want to keep it Haz. This baby is all I have got of him.” You looked up to him.

“What do you want me to do?”

“I just want to know what Tom thinks about having a baby, ask him somehow, don't make it obvious though.”

“Okay”

Harrison called Tom as he put the phone on speaker for you to hear.

“Hey man what's up?”

“Yeah I'm good. How did the audition go?”

“Yeah it went pretty well”

“Nice”

“Umm Tom Y/N has been trying to talk to you why aren't you answering her?”

“Because I don't want to.”

“It can be something important.”

“What important things does she have to say after all this? That she’s so happy right now living her dream”

“I don't know but what if she's you know got pregnant. You guys were at it like rabbits before you guys broke up.” He forcefully chuckled.

“Whoa!! Dude, stop imagining such things. I'm not ready to have kids yet I have a bright career can't ruin that. And even if she's pregnant, I don't care.”

“ Okay Haz I have got some work to do, will talk to you later”

“Yeah mate will talk to you later” Harrison ended the call.

“Y/N?” Harrison said softly

“It's okay Haz I got my answer." You placed your hand on your stomach "This baby is mine, only mine. It doesn't need a father. I'll give all the love it deserves.” You sobbed. Harrison hugged you tight.

“It’s gonna be okay, we are all with you” he kissed your forehead comfortingly.

“Haz you have to promise me one thing in no means you are going to tell about this to anyone not even to Nikki. Promise this to me Harrison ”

“But Y/N is it right to hide from them about their grandchild. They would be thrilled to know about it. And maybe you and Tom can reconcile your differences.”

“Harrison you heard him say it clearly he doesn’t want to be a father. I know he will eventually agree if Nikki and Dom spoke to him. But I don’t want to force him into anything and act as a burden. And I don’t want anybody to pity me or my baby.”

“Okay as you wish” he sighed.

Your parents decided to stay with you until your due date. They couldn't leave you alone to deal with this whole pregnancy.

You finally started to adapt to the changes your body was going through. Your days were spent by writing songs and recording voice memos. Alex handled each and everything for you. You were in your third month now though there was no prominent bump visible. You had made a daily routine to caress your growing belly and talk to the little human growing inside you.

“Don't worry baby, mommy will always be there for you, she will never let any harm come to you. She will love you with everything she has.” You cooed

“Your daddy though he is not with us, he would have been over the moon to hear about you. He would have loved you so much. Always know your dad is the best.”

“I'm gonna name you Destiny because you are going to change my destiny”

But destiny had other things planned for you. One night you woke up with severe abdominal pain as you sat up to see blood stains on the sheets. You desperately called your parents; you were rushed to the hospital as soon as possible.

“Mr and Mrs Y/L/N?”

“Yes we are her parents doctor how is she? Is everything fine?”

“I'm sorry to say there has been excessive vaginal bleeding. We might not be able to save the baby.”

“Will our daughter be okay?”

“Yeah she'll be fine.”

After the procedure was complete your parents were allowed to meet you. You were sitting on the hospital bed, with a blank stare at your lap.

“Jellybean” your dad called you softly.

“Mom, dad I lost my baby too” you burst into tears seeing them.

“Honey it's gonna be okay. It wasn't your fault.” They hugged you trying to console you as you wailed.

All the boys were sitting in the living room as they quietly listened to Harrison. Tom’s eyes were wet.

“Man she was devastated and you deliberately hurt her. That year on Christmas when she came home I somehow persuaded her to tell you about this but after seeing you with a girl she didn’t want to bother you anymore. So she distanced herself from us to get rid of her pain.”

“Harrison I need to talk to her.” Tom got up and held on to Harrison’s hands.

“Tom calm down. I don't think she's ready to talk to you. It's better you leave her alone for tonight.”

“How can you tell me to calm down when I messed up really bad?! Haz I left her alone when she needed me. I hurt her in every possible way.” Tom was desperate

 Meanwhile your phone buzzed it was none other Nikki facetiming you. Of course Harry must have informed them after your grand revelation. You looked at Zendaya and Chloe with fear in your eyes, your hands were shaking.

“You should take it.” Z said, Chloe nodded her head in affirmation.

You took a deep breath and received the call.

“Hey Nikki how are you?” You tried speaking cheerfully.

“We are fine honey. How are you doing dear?”

“I'm fine too.”

“Don't lie to us honey we know what happened.”

“I'm sorry" your voice broke as fresh tears rolled down your cheeks.

“No dear don't be sorry it wasn't your fault.”

“It was selfish of me to hide from you about your grandchild” you sniffled.

“We totally understand why you did that dear, you were hurt. Our son is an idiot but you could have told us peanut. We never saw you less than our daughter.” Dom said.

“I didn't want to bother Tom with the responsibility he didn't want so I had decided until the baby comes nobody has to know.” You sobbed

“We are sorry on behalf of our son we can't imagine what you have gone through dear.”

“Zendaya, Chloe please take care of her and get her some rest.” Nikki requested.

“Yeah sure Nikki.”

Zendaya and Chloe stayed with you for the night. Next morning as you came down the stairs you saw all the boys were waiting for you though Tom and El were missing.

“How are you?” Harrison asked as he hugged you.

“I’m good”

“Hey Y/N we are really sorry on behalf of Tom” Harry apologized

“It’s okay Harry I’m fine” you all came in for a giant hug.

Today Harrison dropped you at the rehearsal ground.

“I’ll come to take you by noon okay” he said while leaving

“Yeah okay bye”

Steve was nowhere to be seen around today. After the nasty fight you two had you had assumed this before only that he might not be interested in you anymore. You discussed with the musicians and chorus singers about the whole order you will sing your songs before starting the practise session.

It was around noon Harrison was about to get in the car to go and pick you up but Tom stopped him.

“Harrison, can I go to pick her up? I really need to talk to her alone” Tom almost begged

“Yeah, sure mate. Try your best.” He handed him the car keys. During the whole drive Tom rehearsed to himself of what he is going to say to you.

“Okay guys let's take it from the top for the one last time then we will wrap it up for today.” You directed. You turned around to see the face you were least interested to see at this moment not after what happened yesterday, your mood went off. Tom was standing in front of the stage, his hands in his pockets, eyebrows furrowed, sadness clouded his features  You could tell he was nervous.

 I don't like your little games

Don't like your tilted stage

The role you made me play

Of the fool, no, I don't like you

You gritted your teeth while singing.

I don't like your perfect crime

How you laugh when you lie

You said the gun was mine

Isn't cool, no, I don't like you (oh!)

You sang anger evident in your voice as you stared directly in his eyes.

But I got smarter, I got harder in the nick of time

Honey, I rose up from the dead, I do it all the time

I've got a list of names and yours is in red, underlined

I check it once, then I check it twice, oh!

Tom could understand by the tone of your voice that you were mad at seeing him.

Ooh, look what you made me do

Look what you made me do

Look what you just made me do

Look what you just made me

Ooh, look what you made me do

Look what you made me do

Look what you just made me do

Look what you just made me do

I don't like your kingdom keys

They once belonged to me

You ask me for a place to sleep

Locked me out and threw a feast (what!?)

If words could slap a person this song of yours was perfect to do the job.

The world moves on, another day, another drama, drama

But not for me, not for me, all I think about is karma

And then the world moves on, but one thing's for sure (sure)

Maybe I got mine, but you'll all get yours

Emphasizing on your words you gave a cold glare as your grip on the microphone tightened.

But I got smarter, I got harder in the nick of time (nick of time)

Honey, I rose up from the dead, I do it all the time (I do it all the time)

I've got a list of names and yours is in red, underlined

I check it once, then I check it twice, oh!

You moved around the stage practicing your little dance moves.

Ooh, look what you made me do

Look what you made me do

Look what you just made me do

Look what you just made me

I don't trust nobody and nobody trusts me

I'll be the actress starring in your bad dreams

I don't trust nobody and nobody trusts me

I'll be the actress starring in your bad dreams

I don't trust nobody and nobody trusts me

I'll be the actress starring in your bad dreams

You continued singing.

“Okay guys well done, let's wrap it up for today.” You packed your stuff and went down the stage. Tom walked up to you.

“I thought Haz was coming to pick me up.”

“He had some other things to do.”

You hummed as you quietly went and sat on the passenger seat. Tom drove the car as you looked outside the window. Tom broke the silence

“Y/N I'm..” You cut him off

“Listen Tom if you are going to gloat about last night please don't I'm in no mood for it. Just take me back home. I'm tired.”

After sometime Tom stopped the car at a place. You recognised the place it was near the cliff.

“Why did we stop?”

“Y/N can we talk? Please.”  He begged

"No I don't want to talk" you said sternly

Tom got out of the car and went to your side to open the door. You looked straight crossing your arms.

"Y/N for God's sake please talk to me" Tom pleaded. You looked at him annoyed.

“You don’t wanna go? Fine! I can walk myself home anyways it's around 10 mins from here” you grabbed your bag and got out of the car. Tom quickly went and stood in front of you blocking your path.

“Tom move let me go”

“No I'm not letting you go until you talk to me”

“There's nothing more to talk about. And I guess Harrison has told you everything.”

“No, I just want to listen to everything from you.”

“What more do you want to hear Tom?”

“We had sex, I wasn't on birth control, condoms are 98% effective and we were the 2% unlucky people so I got pregnant, I tried to reach out to you but you wouldn't answer so I decided to raise my baby myself but I lost my baby.”

“Y/N.. we lost the baby.” Tom corrected you.

“We?? Tom you literally just gave a sperm and after so many years there's no need to acknowledge your paternity as the baby never got to see the daylight. Besides you didn't even want to be a father.”

“Y/N I was angry I didn't actually mean that, I would never do that to you. I would have loved to be a dad to your baby, our baby. That is the life I had always dreamt for us. You, me and our little family.”

“You should be happy right now because whatever you said turned out to be true I really ended up alone, all alone.” You said.

“No you are misunderstanding me Y/N.”

“It's okay Tom that ship has sailed and drowned a long time ago. I finally feel relieved that you got to know about our unborn child.”

“Please Y/N, please give me a chance I will make things right.”

“There's nothing you can do now Tom so just try to get over it as I did.”

“Yes I can, we can start over, just you and me. I'll leave El, call off the wedding.”

“Tom! Do you even know what you are saying?” your eyes went wide.

“Yes you hurt me but I am not going to let you hurt El. At least I don't want to be the reason she gets hurt. She's such a nice girl who's always by your side no matter what, she loves you blindly. And you said you loved her too. She doesn't deserve this.”

“No Y/N it was always you, it has always been you.”

“It’s your guilt that is speaking Tom, you and I know very well that we can never be together, not in this lifetime at least.” Tom hung his head defeated.

“I have no grudges against you Tom. I forgave you a long time ago.”

Tom didn’t say anything more as you both silently got up in the car. El saw you both together as you entered the house. You went to your respective rooms. You laid down on the bed closing your eyes, your legs dangling on the edge as you heard El and Tom arguing. You sat up as you heard El yelling.

“Really Tom?! After everything that happened last night you want me to believe that there is nothing going on between you two.”

“Why don't you admit that your old feelings have resurfaced again? Now even more after knowing that she was carrying your child.”

You felt bad that they were fighting because of you. You couldn't resist yourself so you went to their room. You knocked before entering their room.

“Sorry to interrupt I know it's your personal matter but El I want to assure you there is nothing going on between us.”

“Oh Y/N can you please stop acting now? I really thought you were a good person but guess what you turned out to be a two faced bitch. I should have known that day only when I saw you both dancing so intimately, I let it go thinking you were best friends so it's okay but the night after he returned from the carnival I felt you, your fragrance lingering all over him, I still didn’t want to believe it but yesterday you both cleared my doubts. How far have you two gone by the way? Did you guys fuck? Planning another baby?” El ranted.

“El you can't talk to her like that.” Tom protested.

“Oh yeah now it hurts you. Tom, you were the one who was being literally rude to her all this time. What caused the change of mind? Is it because she was going to be your child's mother or long lost desire for each other?”

You swallowed each and every accusation El gave you thinking you deserved it. If it were somebody else you would have hit the person on the face by now because no one has the right to talk about you or your unborn baby like this. Your eyes were filled with tears. You mustered all courage as you spoke.

“El I just want to say I'm sorry. Please try to bear with me for the next few days. I promise you that I will be gone for good from your lives this time. You will never have to see me again in your life.”

You left the room wiping your tears.

“Seriously El how can you be so insensitive towards her?! She has already gone through a lot for me; don't add up to her miseries.” Tom turned around to leave.

“Where are you going now?”

“To say sorry to her for what you did.”

“I'm going for a drink in the nearby pub.” You said to Zendaya as you came down the stairs.

“I can come with you” she offered

“No it’s fine I’ll take a cab” You left hurriedly

“Hey where is Y/N?” Tom ran down the stairs panting.

“She went to the pub. Why?” Zendaya informed confusion in her eyes.

“Uh El blasted off at her and she went away all upset. I need to apologise to her.”

“Seriously you guys are keeping us on our toes. Can we have a normal day where nobody is crying or fighting?!” Harry scoffed.

Tom took the car keys and ran out to go to the pub. You were sitting in a secluded booth at the corner of the pub sipping on your drink looking out the window.

“Hey Y/N” you turned your gaze to find Steve.

“Oh hi Steve”

“May I sit?”

“Yeah sure”

He slid into the booth beside you.

“Didn't see you during the rehearsal.”

“I was a little tired today.” He ordered his drink shifting himself a little more closer to you.

“So how are you?” He placed his hand on your knee, you felt a little uncomfortable but decided to ignore.

“I’m fine” You felt his hand slowly move higher under your dress.You panicked.

“Steve what are you doing?!” you grabbed his hand to stop whatever he was trying to do.

"You know all this while I really thought you were an innocent, good girl type. So I was taking my time with you. But who knew you were such a little slut.” Steve drew his finger through your jawline

“What the hell Steve back off!!” you pushed him hard.

“Oh c’mon darling I know how much of a whore you are” Steve gripped on to your thigh and cornered you to the side of the seat

“How dare you?!!” In no time your hand went on to his cheek giving him a tight slap.

“You bitch! Now I am gonna show you what sluts like you deserve.” he grasped your hand and forcefully pulled you out of the booth.

“Leave my hand you bastard!! leave me!!” you struggled to free yourself.

“Hey hands off her you asshole!!.” Tom growled, you had to admit that you were never this happy to see Tom in your life.

“Oh well, well, look who is here, the lover boy who had knocked you up pretty well." Steve gave a cocky grin.

Tom was raging with anger, he clenched his fists.

“Don't worry dude I'm gonna treat her really good tonight, you know if you wanna join I don't mind at all”

Tom lifted his hand as he punched Steve’s face hitting right at his jaw. Steve fell flat on his face.

“Stay away from her you piece of shit or the next time you wouldn’t be alive to put your dirty hands on any girl” Tom threatened.

You were shivering in fear, pupils dilated as you looked at Steve groaning on the floor. Tom rushed to you. He cupped your face. You looked at him with wide eyes.

“Y/N, are you okay?? I'm here now, don't worry love.” Your vision went blurry.

“Y/N!!!” Tom shrieked.

You fainted in Tom's arms.

...............................................................................

Taglist : To be added send me an ask I’ll be happy to add you in the following chapters.

 @sleepybesson @sophs-library @spideyparkerstark @itstaskeen @milli86 @biebsmylife95 @quaksonhehe @hannahholland1811 @awhollandx @joyleenl @greatpizzascissorstaco @tomhollandsotherpinkytoe @jjandreidsgirl @brighterthanthesunx @marvelpeters @panicattheeverywherekid @onewithnomightypowers @itsnotmeh24  @bitchinwpei @astridcomming @quacksonobrien @prkrholland 

[drethanramslay]

Voicemails (Part 2)

Pairing: Ethan X MC

Word count: 6.3K words (damn that's a record)

Catch up here.

MASTERLIST

Taglist: @miyakokurono​ @trappedinfandoms​ @openheart12​ @sekizincimektup​ @junggoku​ @ethandaddyramsey​ @edith-eggs1​ @pixelberryownsme​ @samihatuli​ @loveellamae​ @x-kyne-x​ @paulfwesley​ @zeniamiii​ @binny1985​ @an-urban-witch-ig​ @ramseyegerton​ @noboundariesplease​ @mrsdr-ethan-ramsey​ @newcolonies​ @theodorepjames4 @unluckygs​ @choices-love-affair​ @kaavyaethanramsey​  @caseyvalentineramsey​ @ohramsey​ @virtualrain202 @squishywizardhq​  @junehiratas​ @lilyvalentine​ @nooruleman​ @itsgoingnuts​  @agent-breakdance​ @jamespotterthefirst​ @choicesfanaf​ @humanpokemon​ @temptress-of-death-and-desire​ @ac27dj @rookiefromedenbrook @gaiusimp @theeccentricbibliophile  @oofchoices @hatescapsicum @sanchita012 @edgiestwinter @fabi-en-ciel @mrsdrakewalkerblog @elwetritsche75 @livingpurpose @theraisingrail @drramseysownsme @queencarb​ @andromedasinclaire​ @schnitzelbutterfingers​ (if you want to be added to the taglist, let me know ☺️)

Special thanks to @kittykatchoices​ you are awesome <3

Songs: Based on Rock Bottom by Caro and I have added a few more songs to my playlist which you should hear to enhance the experience.

Forgive me if I make any mistakes

DAY 36 (in Boston, Massachusetts)

Leah trudged down the hallway, sipping on her umpteenth energy drink in that day. Her eyes were trained on the chart in her hand, struggling to read them.

Everything looked bleary from the lack of sleep and her eyes were burning under the glare of the clinical lights. Her entire body was begging for rest but it was as if a switch had been flipped in her brain to ignore it. She ignored her thoughts, her feelings and the ever growing void in her chest.

So is this is how vampires feel, huh? Leah questioned herself, snorting at the poor attempt of a joke. Doing that caused her body to pain.

Pain.

That's all she felt these days. It was initially the pain of a heartbreak and rejection but now, it was just tiredness from the burden of her emotions.

Look at me now... From sunshine I have become a shadow...

Why Ethan?

Why?

Leah was the kind of person who always made fun of the naive girl in a rom-com. Her definition and perspective of love had changed when her mother cheated on her father. She did not shun the idea of being in love, but she was still kind of sceptical about it.

And now that she had a taste of it, she was addicted.

She knew that Ethan returned her feelings. She was not blind and oblivious like him. She could see it in his ocean eyes when they stared from across the room. She could hear it whenever he called her 'sunshine'. She could feel it when his arms wrapped around her as she breathed in his musky cologne, with hints of scotch in it.

They say love is a drug but that's not true.

Ethan is her drug and she craved him.

"Hijo de puta." She muttered under her breathe as she ran her hand through her hair, only to feel her shoulder length locks.

She had cut her hair after her birthday. The entire ordeal had destroyed the remaining sanity in her and she couldn't bear to look at herself. Whenever she would see her long hair, she would be reminded of the times when Ethan would play with them and she would get numb all over again.

She craved change so, she went ahead and cut her luscious, black, waist length locks and added highlights to them. It cost her a bomb but she didn't care.

She didn't care...

That was her mantra now.

She just focused on going through the motions of the day, one step at a time. But often, she found herself stumbling into the pit of self doubt and sadness. Leah knew that she was slipping into depression and that she should do something to change it but... It's addicting. The self wallowing is addicting. The numbness is addicting. The self depreciation is addicting.

She avoided her friends as well but they never gave up on her. Bryce would try to crack jokes and make her smile. Elijah would sit with her and play COD so that she could let out all her anger and sadness by killing some bitches. Aurora and Sienna would force her to eat but whenever they weren't looking, she would give her food to Shawty, their fennec fox. They even tried to provide her emotional support but Leah couldn't bear to see the pity in their eyes.

You should count your blessings... Her consciousness nudged her.

The only thing I want to count are the days until I see him.

She felt her phone vibrate and she unlocked it to see the notification but, the photo on her wallpaper made her stop. It made her heart ache.

She had used Ethan's photo as her lock screen. It was one of those many photos she had clicked of him, which Ethan did not find amusing. It was late and she was bored at the medical convention, so she just clicked them for the heck of it. He was annoyed but despite that, he had a small smile dancing on the edge of his lips.

Who would have thought the great Leah would drop down to such low levels of pathetic? She jeered at herself.

Her phone rang again and a name flashed on it. She immediately silenced because she knew that if she were to pick up that call, she would burst into tears.

She had just finished signing her charts when her pager beeped of, signalling that she was being paged by the Chief.

Leah's face scrunched up with confusion as she left the charts at the nurses' station and headed to Dr. Banerji's office.

What did I do wrong? Leah thought to herself as million of thoughts ran through her head, increasing the pounding in her head.

Trying to calm her racing heart she knocked on the open door. Naveen looked up from his desk and a beautiful smile broke on the senior diagnostician's face.

"Ah! Dr. Garcia, come on in. Take a seat." Naveen said with a warm voice as she walked in and took a seat right opposite him. There was a glass facade behind Naveen which overlooked the busy atrium of the hospital.

"You wanted to see me Chief?"

"Yes I did."

"May I know what is it regarding? Because I think that my heart will pop out of my chest with the excessive stress."

Naveen gave a hearty laugh and Leah gave a nervous smile to him.

"No, you haven't done anything wrong. In fact, I am giving you a couple of days of holiday for your hard work."

Leah shook her head and gave a fake smile. "Thank you Chief but... I don't need an off. I love my job and saving lives so no need for this special treatment."

Naveen leaned forward on his table and locked his warm eyes with Leah's tired ones. "You deserve it. It's been brought to my notice, that you have been working way too hard."

Leah sat a little bit more rigid, not liking the message behind the sentence. "Isn't that a good thing? And isn't that what Edenbrook wants from their doctors?"

"Technically yes... But we also want our doctors to not burn out."

She clenched her jaw before speaking. "Chief, I am perfectly fine. I am not burnt out and I have been very proactive. My patients are all stable and breathing, I have been even helping with the ER more, so how is all of that an indicative of me burning out?"

"Leah... I see you as my grand-mentee and I know you well. I am coming from a position of concern for you. I can't have you being sleep deprived and malnutritioned. It's not good for you."

Leah's eyes narrowed. "How do you know I'm malnutritioned? You haven't even seen me since the last three weeks. And don't say that my friend's put forth this concern because I know that I have done a damn good job convincing them that I am okay."

Naveen just gave a sympathetic look and it clicked.

Letting out sharp breath, she looked down and straightened her pencil skirt, trying to distract herself from the gnawing pain and the influx of hope.

"He called you... Didn't he?"

Naveen gravely nodded his head. "Yes he did. Leah... Please take the next four days off. It's an order."

Leah nodded her head and got up, stuffing her hands into her coat, so that she could hide her trembling hands.

"Yes Chief."

She was about to walk out when Naveen called out to her. "Leah... If it's any consolation, he is in a terrible state and misses you too much."

"No... that is no consolation." She said steely, her eyes becoming cold.

"Leah, just trust me. Ethan has had a tough childhood which has forced him to grow up too soon. He has never been a normal kid let alone a normal teenager. When kids his age were chasing love, he was chasing books. That's why he is a walking robot with no sense of emotions.

Leah, since you came into his life, you have woken up the parts of him which he has kept suppressed. You have forced him to stop and feel. And it's been overwhelming for him. So, just be patient with him."

Leah didn't say anything. She just turned on her heels and strode out of the office.

As she walked to the locker room, she clenched her fists. She was totally pissed and the need to punch something was becoming unbearable.

How fucking dare he just control my life?!

She changed out of her clothes and stuffed them angrily into her satchel. She picked up her phone and saw a notification.

(1) message Captain

She read the message and she felt a little happy. She loved her dad and since the entire shit show had started, she missed her family even more.

Speaking of shit show...

He eyes narrowed in on Ethan's contact and the momentary happiness was dissipated, and anger flooded her body. Her shoulders tensed and she clenched the phone even tighter. She pressed on the call icon near his name and picked up the phone to her ear so that she could give him the cursing of his life.

After ringing a couple of time she heard his baritone voice flood through the speaker.

You have reached Dr. Ramsey. I am currently out of the country. If it's urgent, please leave a message.

"Ethan Jonah Ramsey! You are a maldito (damned male)! For a man, you are one maricon (pussy) and I swear as the days pass by I am more convinced that you are a bastardo sin huevos (ball-less bastard)!!

How fuckin dare you, you asshole?! I fucking know that you called Naveen to tell him to give me an off. I don't know weather to dance with joy that you heard my voicemails or to kick you in your balls for not responding.

You need to man the fuck up Ethan because I know that you are so fucking strong. I know it so well."

She panted, anger swirling even more in her chest.

"Ethan you need to stop playing the fucking victim. I know that you have had a tough childhood and that really hurt you... But I didn't have it any easier either. I was bullied through out school and my mom used to pimp the fuck outta me. She even cheated on my dad for five consecutive years till I kicked her out of the house."

Tears stung her eyes as she spoke. "But that did not once break my spirit E. I didn't let the damage of my past define me. I focused on redefining myself and I got rid of my bad habits like smoking weed and drinking every alternate day."

"We all got scars and I know that it hurts sometimes. I am not discounting your pain but, if you continue to let it eat you up baby then you will lose yourself to it. And I don't want that for you.

Ethan... You are such a beautiful soul and such a great man who is deserving of the best things in life. You deserve love and happiness. The only thing which is standing between you and all the good things is... Well you.

Stop punishing yourself. Because that is not only going to hurt you, but also the people around you.

You have been so deep in that vicious cycle that you haven't realised that you are hurting me too..."

She sighed as she looked down on her black converse.

"Ethan, emotions are what make us human... You can't run from them forever.

What we have, is so so beautiful... Just come back to me so that I can show you that... Till then, take care, love you and bye..."

DAY 36 (in Tefé, Amazonas)

"Till the take care, love you and bye..."

You have reached the end of the voicemail.

Ethan brought his phone down, guilt and shame swimming in his blue eyes. He knew that it was a dick move to call her superior and get her to take an off but he couldn't bare to see her get weaker and weaker as the days passed.

And the fact that I am the reason behind her sadness...

Ethan pressed his palms against his eyes and applied pressure so as to push back the tears threatening to spill.

He felt so much shame. It coiled around his chest, slowly tightening, choking him.

He didn't deserve her love and he definitely did not deserve her empathy. He did not deserve her kindness nor did he deserve the compassion that she showered his way. She did not deserve to be treated like a doormat or be fucked over by the mixed signals. If he truly loved her he would leave her behind and move on with his life.

But he is selfish.

He couldn't bear the thought of seeing her in the arms of another man. The thought made him want to punch the closest thing to him. He looked down to stare at the wallpaper of his lockscreen.

It was one of the many impromptu pictures he had clicked of her. Most of the ones he had were when she wasn't looking his way but this one, was one of the rare ones where she stared at the camera. A beautiful dimpled smile stared back at him, her hair covering half of her face.

God, she is beautiful with a divine soul.

I don't deserve her... But I want to be hers...

He took the stationery out and with a heavy heart, proceeded to pour out all his regret and shame on to the coffee stained paper.

DAY 45

After numerous sleepless nights Ethan knew that if he didn't sleep, he would surely collapse.

So bidding his colleagues adieu, he went to the motorcycle parked in the makeshift parking lot.

He had recently learnt how to drive a bike and now he somewhat related to those motorbike junkies.

It was an exhilarating experience. The breeze whistling through his brown wavy hair, the feeling of the sun shining on his face and to hear the roar of Amazon as he rode down the roads was intoxicating.

He felt the most at peace when he rode the bike. The hum of the engine beneath him would lull him into a state of calmness and it's only during those times, his mind would wander to Leah.

He would often think about how much Leah would enjoy pillion riding. He could imagine her having this wide grin on her face and her arms wrapped around his lean waist. He could imagine her hair billowing behind her in wild waves and the sun would make her skin glow with a caramel hue. She would giggle as the wind tickling her face.

These thoughts were what kept him sane, and gave him something to look forward too. He knew that it was ironic but he just couldn't help himself.

It had been a month since he had last seen her and he missed her so much.

The sun had set and Ethan parked his bike near the B&B he was living in. After taking out the keys from the ignition, he climbed the steps leading to the reception. He gave a nod to the receptionist and trudged to his room, tiredness making him hunch as he walked.

As he stepped into his room, he started stripping till he was in his underwear. He headed to the bathroom to get fresh, his body on auto pilot. His brain felt like mush and his eyes were bloodshot red.

I need a scotch... He thought to himself. In the last month, all the pubs and restaurants were closed so he couldn't go anywhere to get a drink. He was stressed and tired, both emotionally and physically.

He sighed and headed to his bed, stark naked. The moment his head hit the pillow, he passed out, slipping into a deep slumber.

He was so deep asleep, that he didn't hear the sound of his phone ringing.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sunshine streamed through the sheer curtains, illuminating the room in a soft glow. The reflection of the river casted shadows on the walls and the birds chirped a happy tune, to signal the start of a new day.

Ethan started waking up gradually, feeling much better. He felt well rested and his back wasn't killing him anymore. He stretched, the muscles of his abdomen and back, contracting and relaxing, as he got rid of the lingering sleep.

He sat up and his eyes landed on his phone. Picking it up he started checking his notifications as he headed to the washroom to start with his morning chores.

There were a couple from the hospital, updating him about the patients. None of them were dead so that's a good thing. He saw messages from his dad and Naveen but his eyes narrowed in on a particular name.

Leah🌞 (1) voicemail (10) messages

That's new. Ethan mused as he brushed his teeth. He pressed the play button and kept the phone on speaker.

"Heyyyyy Ethannnn." Leah slurred and Ethan's eyes widened.

"What's up duuddddee? How is it hangin' man? It been so long since I have spoken to you and no this...this 'voicemails' don't count because you aren't replying to me."

A short pause followed before Leah spoke up over the music. "Do you hate me? Like I need to know. I need ANSWERS. Am I that revolting that you had to run thousands and hundreds of miles away from me? Is it because I snort when I laugh?"

Her voice cracked towards the end before she snorted.

"You know what? You are one grade A pussy. Yes, you heard me! Inserts the 'Why are you running?' meme. I don't think you would understand that context because you are an anormal. I- I don't understand this running business. I show you affections you run away. I compliment you, you run away. I have sex with you, you run away. Maybe... Maybe I am the dumbass here?

Tbh, I have no fuckin' clue!!

And I am here all alone in this... Dive in bar or whatever the fuck this is, and the guys have just been flirting with me. And they should because I am a motherfucking goddess!! Like have you see my ass? Wait, you have whoops... but the point is, whenever they walk up to me or- or buy me a drink my dumb brain goes on to analyse how they can never compare to you.

So thanks bro, you fucked me up real good!"

Leah laughed so hard and worry churned in his chest.

She blew a raspberry. "Ethan, idk man you suck. Like so bad...or should I say good? I am confusion at this point. When I am sober, I miss you so so much. So I decided why not forget by getting completely and utterly wasted. But... Now I am drunk and I miss you more and none of my friends are here to save me from my phone so sorry, if I said somethings that I meant, 'kay?

I honestly though that loving you would be easy but... I don't feel like loving you anymore. But that's the thing about love... You can fall in love easily, but getting over someone you love could take foreverrrr.

So, don't worry bro. It's not like I am getting over you anytime soon and I am not running away anywhere. Can't say the same thing 'bout you though...

Anyways, it is 3 am and I see Bryce coming... So fuck you man. You missed out on your one shot at love and I hope you be alone for the rest of your life. Peace out, chinga madre!"

The voicemail ended and Ethan stood in shock.

I don't feel like loving you anymore...

You missed your one shot at love...

Those words cut so deep into his heart. It was painful and Ethan had to grip the counter. He could feel his heart shattering and tears threatened to spill. Those words hurt, it felt like a stitch tearing or a punch in the gut.

Ethan was never one to be affected by words. But these ones stung him.

So this is how Leah felt when I ran away...

As Leah says, I am a dumbass.

Ethan reached for the tap and splashed water on his face and wiped his hands before opening the messages.

Leah... I may be an asshole but I will always want to be your asshole.

That come out wrong.

Fuck.

Ethan shook his head and sat on the desk, scratching his beard and thinking of what to write in his response.

DAY 50

Ethan took his stethoscope from his ears and smiled at the child. "You are getting strong Julio."

"So I am killing all the bad germs?" Eyes filled with curiosity looked up at him.

"Yes. You are just like spiderboy, killing all the bad guys."

"It's Spiderman Dr. Ramsey!!" The boy exclaimed.

It's the same thing! But, Ethan knew better than to bring it up. He had learnt his lesson with Leah and her obsession with Marvel.

"Okay, okay, spiderman. Just a another week of rest and medicines and you will beat all of the bad boys like him."

"But the medicine is so yucky..." The 4 year old scrunched his face up and crossed his arms.

"I know the medicines taste bad so I have something for you for being a good boy."

"Really?!" He asked gleefully.

Ethan dug into his coat and took out some lemon candy. "Here Julio."

He squealed and took it. "Thank you!!"

He felt his phone ring in his pocket and he took it out to see. When his eyes landed on the notification, his face morphed into a grin.

Leah🌞 (1) missed call (1) voicemail

"Who is that?" Julio looked over Ethan's hand to look at the phone. Ethan looked at the kid and saw him staring at the wallpaper of his lockscreen.

"That... That is a girl."

"Even I can see that Dr. R." The kid rolled his eyes and studied Leah's picture with utmost concentration. "Is she your wife? Or your girlfriend?"

Ethan choked and covered it up with a cough. "Um... nothing of that sort. She is just a girl, who I miss a lot."

"But she must be something you, no? If you miss her so much?" Brown eyes twinkled as he looked up with innocence in his eye.

"She is my Sunshine." He shrugged as he ruffled Julio's hair. "But enough worrying about me. Be a good kid and don't bother your mama, Julio." Ethan started walking out if the room.

"Sim! Also, luz solar (your sunshine) is so pretty." The boy called out to him.

Don't I know that?

Ethan shook his head, smiling to himself as he walked up to the nurse's station. He disposed his gloves and sanitized his hands before taking his phone out. He walked to the near by supply closet so that he could hear the voicemail without any disturbance.

"Hey Ethan... Well the last voicemail was a disaster, wasn't it?" Leah nervously chuckled over the line.

"Please don't hate me. I tried to apologise through the messages. And I know you read them because I saw the bubble with three dots for half an hour. So, if you think you are sneaky, then you need to work on your skills old man." She chuckled and Ethan chuckled at the comment.

I could never hate you sunshine.

"I am actually doing so much better now. I think I just needed to get wasted... Have a good cry... And curse you out or something. No offense.

I have been listening to so many songs and I relate to them at a spiritual level. Everything sounds like a love song now. It's a real dilemma whether to dance or cry to them.

Also, Sienna has been such a huge help! Naveen told her whatever happened and she is so supportive... We watched trashy romantic movies and ate so much ice cream. My dad also it's going to come in a couple of days so... Maybe he will give me advice?

So things aren't as hopeless as they were a week ago.

I mean, it still hurts but it doesn't rip me apart everyday. I still hate you a little but, my love overpowers it. It's a war everyday but I try to beat down the sadness everyday."

Ethan felt so proud of Leah. She just needs to be reminded how strong she is and she will annihilate all her demons.

"I am gonna be honest... Your tactic of running away isn't going to make my feelings less for you, because absence makes the heart grow fonder. Like right now, I am witnessing Zaid feeding Ines cake. It's their anniversary and they are so in love that I feel like an outsider.

I mean I am in love but, the love of my life isn't here. So... Yeah.. I miss you right now... But, I have a strong feeling that our relationship is a unique kind, Y'know? Our relationship is so deep rooted and emotionally strong, that it can survive numerous storms.

We are so beautiful and so strong together... 

I am just waiting for the day when you realise that E.

And when you realise, I hope you come back to me."

Ethan brought his phone down, heart filled with so much love for this woman. He is aware of the feelings he had for her and he could have said those three words easily. But, deep down he knew he wasn't ready.

He wasn't the man she deserved yet. He had way too many demons of his past and in order to be with her, he had to face them and this time, he would do it the right way.

So with a bitter sweet feeling and courage, he got up and went back to work.

DAY 53

"Doctor, the gymnasium lot of patients are responding positively to the new vaccine." The young intern spoke excitedly.

"That's good. And have we finished the inoculation procedure for ward 314?"

"Yes doctor."

"Excellent work, Dr. Santos." Ethan nodded before looking down at the charts. It was mid afternoon and the sun relentlessly beat down on his back, making his sweat excessively.

He was standing outside the make-shift tent near the gymnasium, going through the charts. He was posted in the hospital, on the other side of the city usually but they swapped him to work at the gymnasium for today.

He could see so much joy and happiness in the recovered patients as they embraced and kissed their loved ones. It was a harrowing period for them and being apart for two months can really be lonely. He saw the young lovers kiss and hug each other tightly.

Will this be me and Leah when I meet her again? Ethan wondered as his eyes dropped down to the sheets of papers in his hand.

"Ethan! Glad you could join us here." Dr. Batra said with a soft smile.

"Hello to you too Dr. Batra."

"I have told you numerous times to call me Neelam. We have worked and fought an epidemic together so you can call me by my first name."

"Sorry Neelam, force of habit I guess."

"How are you since I last saw you? Have you been eating? Have you been sleeping?" She asked, her eyes critically observing him, like a mother does to her child.

Ethan was not familiar with the concept of maternal love. He found it foreign but at the same time, it helped a little in filling the void in his heart.

"Yes Neelam. I have been taking care of myself."

"And how about your, jaanu?"

"Jaanu?" Ethan asked inquisitively as he turned his head to look at her.

"Jaanu in hindi means love of your life." She said with a sly smirk playing on her lips.

"Good god." He groaned and stuffed his face even more into the charts, feeling his cheeks burning up.

"She is fine." He muttered out.

"Sorry, I couldn't hear that."

Ethan narrowed his eyes at her and she just gave a toothy grin. "I said that she is doing fine. As fine as she can be." He felt a tinge of guilt flare up in his chest.

"Ethan... Don't feel guilty. If she truly loves you, she will understand." her face full of empathy.

"That's the problem!! I have been nothing but a fucktard and yet she shows me empathy and loves me unconditionally. I feel so damn guilty and I hate myself for hurting her."

"Ethan, I have said this before and I will say it again. I can see how much you love her but, how will you return all that love if you can't even love yourself?"

"Love myself? Where is that coming from?"

"You put up the 'I don't give a damn about your opinion' vibe but I can see the self hatred in your eyes. Son, you are the thorn in your own path."

"I..." For the first time in a long time, Ethan was rendered speechless.

"Ethan... The first step towards loving someone is loving yourself first. Okay...Imagine that you have a cup. Self love fills half of that cup up and when you find 'the one', it becomes full. It's like a mutualistic relationship, you fill her cup up and vice versa.

Right now, your cup is empty because of the self hatred. And your girl is trying her very best to fill up the void but, she is loosing out on herself while doing that. It's hurting her as well as you."

"So what do I do?"

"You communicate. You talk out your feelings. Have trust in her that when you open up your deepest vulnerabilities, she will accept it and not hesitate to love you. Love is a two way street. You can't expect her to bare her soul if you can't do the same."

"Wow." Ethan's head was full with thoughts.

"Wow indeed."

"Neelam, we should call you the Love doctor."

She gave a tinkling laugh, her dark brown eyes twinkling. "Nah son. I am just a woman who has seen a lot in life."

He was about to respond when he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. He dug his phone out and unlocked it.

Leah 🌞 (1) voicemail

"Sorry I have to take this." Neelam nodded and he walked towards the deserted park. He sat down on the rusty swing and pressed the phone to his ear.

"Hey... So I told you that my dad was coming to Boston, right? Well, we had a nice chat about us and it's been really insightful.

Needless to say my father said some not nice things and he almost brought an entire squad of marines to beat the shit outta you BUT, I stopped him because as much as you infuriate me, I would like your pretty face intact."

Ethan chuckled as he played with his frayed ripped jeans.

"I told him about how sad I have been and how everything sucks. I even spoke about the happy times when we would solve the various cases together or the times when we would buy take out and pull all nighters. I spoke about my fears and doubts that maybe, just maybe you don't love me. After hearing my rant he told me something that helped erase all the lingering doubts.

He said, "Mija, When someone makes you the happiest person and the saddest person at the same time, that's when it's real. That's when it's worth something." Isn't that true for us?

I can make you so angry that you could put hulk to shame but, I can also make you laugh when you are low. And vice versa! You make me so happy most of the times... when you are not being a colossal pain in the ass."

There was silence on the line, as if she was thinking.

"I think I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt... only more love.

This is just a rough patch but, there is light at the end of the tunnel. Just like after a dark storm comes sunshine.

This is just a test for us, to see if we are strong. And believe me, I think we are the unstoppable duo. The diagnostics posse!

And when all this... Haze of doubts was cleared from my mind, I could see clearly. I could remember the promise I made you.

I will be waiting, for as long as you need.

And it's true.

So for now... I will love you through the phone. I will try to make it a point for you to know, that I will never ever stop loving you. I will be there through thick and thin.

Just give me a chance to prove it. Have faith that I will catch you when you fall. Just, come back to me.

I love you...bye."

Ethan stared at his phone for a long time. There were so many thoughts swimming in his head. But one thought just rang wide and clear in his head. Or rather, one word.

Sunshine...

So he sat there, alone with his thoughts until the sun set on him.

DAY 59

"To the best team of doctors!" A thunder of applause ran through the huge crowd as they screamed and shouted with joy.

"Thanks to these geniuses, Tefé is now free of cholera! Also, a huge thanks to the citizens as well. Your support has been so helpful. We are strong together!" The mayor's voice boomed.

We are strong together... You and I. Leah's words resounded in his head as he looked down at his combat boots, arms crossed.

He wasn't paying any attention to the mindless congratulations. His mind was swirling with the thought that within 60 hours, he is going to see her.

He was done with slogging his ass and he was done running. He will man the fuck up, and fix his issues before he asks her out. That's a promise he made to himself.

The gift he bought for her, weighed him down with uncertainty. Whether she would like it or not.

His mind was also going back to last year. The intern year was going to come to an end in two days and Ethan couldn't fathom just how far she had come. Last year, at this time, he met her. If you would have told him that he would have fallen head over heels in love with someone, he would have just admitted that person for LSD overuse. But, now here we are.

Damnn... Its already been a year.

After the thank you ceremony was done, the doctors headed to the pub for a drink. They ordered some local cuisines and a couple of beers to celebrate their win. As much as Ethan enjoyed the smooth scotch running down his throat, he still couldn't keep his mind off their inevitable meeting.

Will she look at me and be angry?

Will she throw a drink on my face? Or kick me in the balls?

Or will she jump into my arms?

Questions... Questions...

By the time they were done, it was almost 2 am. They had an afternoon flight so that was a good thing. He wasn't drunk, but definitely a little tipsy. The last thing he wanted was to nurse a hangover early in the morning that too, on a flight.

After being dropped off at his B&B, he felt his phone vibrate. He saw Leah's name flash and his face scrunched in confusion.

It's late, she should be asleep.

He pressed the button to play the voicemail and Leah's soft voice flooded, making Ethan even more intoxicated.

"Hi... Today it's a clear sky and honestly, it looks so beautiful. The moon is shining so bright and the stars are twinkling. I was brought up in Washington DC and never in my life have I ever seen so many stars at night. It's so breathtaking..."

Ethan headed to the basically and stood outside. He leaned on the railing and looked up and indeed, it was a starry night. It was like diamonds glittering and swaying in the moonlight. And the moon... It shone in its elegance, basking Ethan in its radiance.

Leah chuckled. "I can't believe it's been a year since I became a doctor. A full fledged working doctor. It seems so surreal how this year passed by in a flash. I feel like I have grown and matured, but at the same time I still feel as clueless as my first day of work.

The day I met you... T

o be honest, I expected a grumpy old grandpa as Ethan Ramsey, but I got a handsome, dashing grump instead. I ain't complaining though. It's just...I am in a reminiscing mood."

Don't worry sunshine... Me too.

"Did you know, when we look at stars on a clear night sky we are, in a way, looking back in time? Before you roll your eyes and think this is some philosophical propaganda, there is a perfect logical explanation to it. What we see today is an object whose emitted light started its journey millions of year back and from trillions of kilometres away and are reaching our eyes now.

So... Here I am, peeping into the memories of our past. The kisses, the hugs, the love making and the joyous moments we shared. I miss that..

I miss us... I am here, waiting for you.

Come back to me, Ethan."

Ethan replayed the voicemail, as he continued to look at the stars, thinking back to the times when he had her I'm his arms.

Don't worry sunshine, I am coming home.

well, what do you think?

and what do you think will be Leah’s reaction?

a. she will kick him in the nuts

b. she will kiss the fuck outta him

c. all of the above

I hope y'all liked it.. was lowkey nervous bout this fic heheheh

like, comment and reblog ;))

[m-feline]

My first writing here at Tumblr. Fem. reader is the adoptive daughter of the tmnt family. She is the only one going to school and ends in trouble. How do turtles react when they hear about it.

Hope you like it.

------------

”I’m in trouble.” You sighed as you walked to the principal’s office.

Of all times why did you have to lose your cool right now? Because they were jerks and deserved it, yeah. But sensei taught you better. He said it takes bigger strength to simply let anger take over you. And that knowing martial arts comes with responsibility and yada, yada. But sure, try to remain calm when all four brothers can go out kick butt at all the bad guys out there. But not you, no. You had to finish school and try to not start any fights.

Most of the time it worked. You were silent and closed in kind of person. The one who survived a nasty burn, which was reminded at everyone by hiding half of your face with your hair. No one came close to you or tried to talk to you because they were either grossed out by the burn, took pity, or scared to even look at you. Well, now they’ll be scared alright.

You finally arrived at the office and took a seat in the hallway near the entrance. You weren’t worried about getting detention or being expelled from school. No, what worried you was what to explain to the principal that your guardian isn’t coming.

“Oh, sorry my guarding can’t come because he is a giant rat and is now busy training four giant turtles in the art of Ninjitsu.”

Talk about the excuse of the year. Worst case would be, a social worker to come a check where you live. For crying out loud, only four months and you would be out of the school. You had a bad feeling.

“(Y/n)?”

You looked up at your lap as you heard someone call your name.

“April? Why are you here?” You asked.

“I heard you are in trouble. What happened?” She answered as both of you hugged.

It had been a while since events where the tower collapsed instead of spreading poisonous gas over New York. April had been busy so you haven’t seen her a while.

“I got into a fight, promise not to tell Splinter. He might get worried and… you know the rest.” You tried to explain.

“Umm.” April just hanged as she pulled out her cellphone.

“He knows already.” You sighed after realizing that the phone was connected and on speaker.

“(Y/n), what did you do?” You heard the voice of Splinter at the end of the line.

“I know, I know. I lost my composure, violence is not the answer and I should have been the better man by walking away.” You commented as you already knew the lecture.

“You are almost out of school. A little patience goes for a long way.” He taught you through the phone.

“Not in this case, believe me. They had it coming and deserved it.” You tried to explain.

“What? Who deserve it?” Another voice you recognized asked through the phone.

That was Mikey. It didn’t need a guess that Splinter was also on speaker.

“(Y/n), did you get in a fight? Are you okay?” Another voice asked which you recognized as Leo.

“I hope you won. That way, even if you get punished, you got something out of it.” Ralph commented.

“(Y/n), just tell me the time and I can hack into the school’s security system, find the record of it and erase it. This way there'll be no evidence against you.” Donnie suggested.

“Donnie, that’s illegal.” You notify him.

“But I’m already in.” He said.

“Dad.” You said in a begging tone.

“Boys, all of you move away. I will speak with the principal soon and if you don’t want to spent rest of the day in Hashin…” Splinter warned them.

“We shall leave now.” Leo said.

“Sis, remember no matter what happens we love you.” Mikey says before his voice goes away with others.

Which happened just in time when the door to principals office opened. And not so happy looking man came out .

“(Y/n) Hamato.” He called.

“Hamato?” April asked.

“Our last name. Splinter picked it from the book of ninjutsu.” You explained as the two of you entered the principal’s office.

“Are you relative of (Y/n) Hamato?” Principal asked from April.

“She is a family friend, my guardian couldn’t make it.” You said.

“I told you that I wanted to speak with your guardian.” Principal said with a disappointment.

“I am present, I just cannot leave my place due to a situation with my body.” Heard Splinters voice through the speaker of the phone.

Principal was a bit taken that my guardian spoke through the phone instead of coming to the meeting, but understood the reason once he heard about the situation.

“Then Mr. Hamato, I must have very serious talk with you.” Principal began.

“I am listening.”

“(Y/n) fought with two boys in my school and one of them had be sent to hospital. Both boys parents are concerned and demanded some kind of punishment for her. But since she is almost out of school, I wish to discuss with you of an alternative way of punishment. And I have to remind you this isn’t a first time she causes trouble.” Principal said.

“Very serious indeed. One should show self control and avoid such situations.” Splinter was heard through the phone.

“I'm glad you think the same Mr. Hamato. Our school doesn’t stand for violence. Which is why I have now demanded a meeting. I still would prefer for you to be here personally.” Principal said.

“I'm sure you would but my situation doesn’t allow me to get out. I barely let my sons out…” Splinter said.

“OH NO, HE DIDN’T!”

I heard Mikey scream in the background loud enough to be heard through the phone. There were also sounds of Don, Leo, and Ralph saying something but they weren’t loud as Mikey was a moment ago.

“Excuse me a moment.” Splinter said on the phone.

Having boys heard more clearly meant Splinter had moved to where they were. And I could tell from their sounds that they were both mad and shocked.

“And only one of them is at the hospital? Where is that other punk?” Heard Ralph.

“I can’t watch this. As a good brother, I shouldn’t watch this.” Heard Leo.

“Then keep your eyes away from the comments. I thought that bullying on the internet is illegal.” Donnie was heard.

“Boys, what are you doing? I’m trying to have a conversation with the principal.” Splinter said.

“Donnie found out what happened at (Y/n)’s school.” Mikey told on.

“Donatello.” Splinter warned.

“I didn’t hack any system. I found this on Social media. And boy it is mean.”

“Since you found it at someone else’s posting, then do tell me what happened.” Splinter sighed.

“Sure. This is (Y/n) and those two are the bullies.” Don said.

“Yeah, and there they go and should keep going, but no. That one punk stops says something at our sister and the other jerk comes and pushes and then that one grabs her…” Ralph tells.

“Do not finish that sentence.” Splinter warned him.

“I won’t say it, but you saw it.” Ralph excuses.

“And then (Y/n) use the snake grip on the guy, spin him, made him fall to the ground. One tries to punch her and she kicks him… and there ends the video.” Leo narrated.

“Permission to go to the hospital smash what is left of this punk who sexually assaulted our sister?” Ralph asked.

“No.” Splinter said.

“But they are punishing her for defending herself. The school may not approve violence, but abuse? Not cool, man.” Mikey protested.

“Then how about I hack and crash all devices of people who bully her on internet?” Donnie asked.

“No.”

“But dad…”

“Boys, listen. There is one boy at the hospital already… Find out where the other one lives and send him to the hospital too. Hopefully, they'll be roommates.” Splinter said.

“Ooh.” All four say.

“One thing is to fight in school but if there is no Justice inside the school then a little reminder is in order. Just go find this boy who abused (Y/n), and make him see why it isn’t smart to harass your sister.” Splinter said.

“Can we all go?” Mikey asked.

“If that makes the point more clear then yes.” Splinter said.

“I’m going to make him cry for even looking at her.” Ralph said.

“Justice for our sister!” Declared Mikey.

“Hey, is that phone still on?” Leo asked.

“More importantly is it on speaker?” Donnie asked.

By now, I had pulled the hood of my (f/c) hoodie over my head and tried to hide myself as much as possible. This was beyond embarrassing. The principals face had changed many times to shock, fear and worry. I wasn’t sure what April was thinking now, but I need one more favor from her.

“April, can I come sleepover at your place?” I asked while hiding my face inside the hoodie.

“If you promise to tell me what really happened.” April said.

[babyspiderling]

The Moonwalker and the Time-Traveler Prologue

California, 2020

 “Ms. L/N, I suggest you wake up for my class if you want to pass this course.” I blink up at my professor, it seems that I fell asleep during history class again. “I’m sorry Professor Berkley, I was up all last night with my roommate tinkering all night.” At that he softens, a grandfatherly look in his eye. “Oh Y/N, I understand, but if you truly want to be a history major, you have to stay awake! I will not simply give you a free pass while trying to adjust, just please, try to stay awake in my class.” Standing, I nod. “Yes sir. I’ll do my best.” After this, I am dismissed and head back to my dorm room to hopefully catch a nap. 

Kicking the door shut, I move to collapse onto my bed, but am blocked by whatever my engineering major roommate has built in the dorm for his latest project. “Seriously dude? Don’t you have a lab for this kind of stuff?” I kick off my shoes and do my best to move around it, finally, truly collapsing onto my bed. I fall asleep quickly, hopefully revisiting the dream I had during class. 

Lord knows how much later, I wake up to my roommate continuing to tinker on his project. Grumbling under my pillow, “Danny, don’t you have a lab for this shit? Why do you have to do it here, I’m sleeping in classes because of this!” He sheepishly lifts his head up to respond. “Uh, well, I uh… It’satimemachine.” Snapping my head up, I question “It’s a what?” Once again he looks shy and guilty. “It’s a, uh, Time Machine. Or at least that’s what I’m wanting it to be. I’m still working on it.” Well, I’m definitely awake now. “So, like, what’s the problem?” Finally putting down his tools, Danny turns to me, “It should work. I ran the simulations and used the one that worked. It’s just… not connecting I guess.” Glancing at the clock, it’s getting late. “Look Danny, I’m going to clean up some of my stuff. Go get some food. I know you haven’t eaten yet.” With a defeated sigh, Danny agrees and leaves the room. I slip into a pair of shorts and an old David Bowie tour shirt I had found at a thrift store. Picking up things here and there, folding abandoned pieces of laundry, I hum and bop around the room, dancing along to “Working Day and Night”, practicing turns and isolations to the beat. Taking a deep breath I prep and spin as fast and as long as I can, but my foot slips out from under me. I tumble to the floor, tripping over some cord. Oh well, it’s probably Danny's “mood lighting”, I plug it in and decide to check out the “Time Machine”. “Ground Control to Major Tom! Prepare for lift-off!” I press random buttons, dicking around and typing 1984, then some other buttons. “Huh, sucks it really doesn’t work. It’d be cool if you really could time travel.” Once again I trip over Danny’s junk on the floor of the project and slam into one last button I had yet to press. On the way down I hit my head, and the world went black as a whirring sound filled my ears. 

Waking up, I find myself in a room about the size of mine, decorated much like my side of the dorm, with a funky retro feeling to it. “Danny, this isn’t funny, I get it, I’m gullible for believing the machine was real. Now how the Hell did you change all this so quick… and get rid of the machine?” I continue searching the room for Danny, and realise that the sun had already risen hours ago. I may have been out for longer than I thought, and come crashing into a body. Awesome! Now I can really teach that boy a lesson for pulling that. “Hey, what are you doing in my dorm? Nice shirt by the way, I was at the Anaheim show a couple months ago. That’s where you got the shirt, right?” I blink at the guy my age, still processing the amount of denim and hair products he has decided to use for the day. “What? Oh, uh, my shirt. Wait, did you say you saw him in Anaheim a couple months ago? What year are you from?” He knits his brows together. “1984. Are you ok? Did you get a bad hit or something? Do I need to call someone for you?” I space myself from him, the stimulation of this whole situation too much. “No, no I’m ok. What’s today’s date?” His eyes are still filled with concern as he replies with January 26th 1984, and that I’m still at University of Redlands, just 36 years before I attend. “Wait, January 26th, why does that sound so familiar? I hear Beat It blare down the hall and I can practically see the light bulb above my head. “Do you know how to get to the Shrine Auditorium?” 

We zip down the highway on Tyler’s motorcycle, making a trip down to L.A. He had me explain my whole ordeal to him before he just drove me to a random concert venue. It took a bit to convince him, but the second I pulled my smartphone out he was on board. He pulls off to a strip mall and helps me dismount. “Wait, why are we at a mall? I need to get to that venue before security secures it.” He just rolls his eyes. “If you want to get in and stay in without too much attention, you need to look a little bit different. Time to fit in.” He drags me into store after store, and I finally piece together a “Bad” inspired outfit. A black crop top slips off one shoulder, leather pants pull tight around my legs and hips, a blood red leather jacket drapes my shoulders, and matching leather boots clutch my feet. “Tyler, this is too much. I can’t even pay you back.” He rolls his eyes and pays for the clothes, letting me keep my own hoops and rings. “Look, just meeting a time traveler is cool, dressing one is even better. When you get back home and you still want to pay me back, we’ll figure it out. Let’s get you to the moonwalker himself.” 

As we pull into the parking lot for the venue, there isn’t another soul in sight. “Hey, here’s my address, if you ever want to mail me, or just let me know that you’re doing ok.” He hands me a slip of paper, and I hug him tightly. “Thank you Tyler, I am forever in your debt. If you’re anywhere near the university in 2020, let me know.” With that, he rides back home into the sunset, and I sneak into the venue before security shows up. 

It’s a good thing I like the song Billie Jean, because I have heard it about 72 times in the last hour. During sound check alone I almost lost my mind, with just the baseline intro playing for 30 minutes. As I hear the cue from the director that it is time to actually film the commercial. I hear “Take One!” in the distance and I ditch my jacket behind a stack of crates, my phone hidden in the pocket. I find the side entrance of the stage as take 3 is anounced. I crouch down in a runners position at take 5, launching myself at take 6. Michael nears the pyrotechnic and I slam my body into his as it goes off, now missing him by inches. There are screams of terror and shock as we fly through the air, now spun so that I land on my back, Michael on top of me. His brothers quickly help him up and off of me as I am seized by security, doing my best to put as little weight on my now injured ankle as possible. I raise my hands in surrender, trying to think my way out of this. “Look! Look, I can explain all of this, including how I knew that this take wasn’t going to go well. Let me explain and I will never try to contact any of you again!” Everyone around me exchanges glances, deciding whether to trust me or not. Tito steps forward, his eyes full of scrutiny. “Alright girl, explain.” I sigh and grimace in pain. “I can’t do it out here. Too many people. And my evidence of my claims are in my jacket backstage.” He glances back at Michael, nodding in response to his younger brother. I am escorted backstage, am allowed to sit down to relieve my ankle, and I start my story. “I’m from the future, 36 years in the future to be a bit more specific. I’m not crazy.” Michael crouches down in front of me, “If you’re really a time traveler I would love to talk about the future with you!” He’s nudged and given a look from his older brothers, and his smile is dimmed a bit. “But if you’re from the future, wouldn’t you know songs I haven’t released yet?” I nod my head, but I get hit with the issue of Thriller already being released and the “Bad” sessions not yet started for at least another 6 months, if not more. I flip through the collection of Michael songs I know by heart, trying to find one he’s recorded but not yet released. “Oh! I know about “Love never felt so good”! The one you recorded with Paul Anka! I can sing it for you!” I start at the chorus, my brain too frazzled to remember it’s entirety. Everyone else who knows about the song exchanges looks, one brother even shouting questions of how I knew it. “It’s on my phone, and I’m from the future. All your music’s been released. Well, almost all of it. There’s still tracks from your upcoming session that I have yet to find. Here, I can show you.” Lifting myself from my seat, I reach to retrieve my jacket from behind the crates. Everyone watches me with baited breath, wanting to see what the time traveler will pull out next. I pull out my phone and search for the Xscape album. I press play on the original track and Michael's voice rings out from the speaker. I switch it up to “Working Day and Night”, what I was listening to before I got here. 

“Look, I can play you anything you’ve already recorded. I just can’t play you anything you haven’t done yet. Those are the rules.” Michael escorts me back to his dressing room to ask me questions about the future since I am no longer seen as crazy. “Are there flying cars ? What about people living in space? Are there aliens?” I giggle at his excitement. “Well, we do have people living in space, it isn’t commercialized yet, so you and I couldn’t go. We don’t have flying cars, but we do have self driving ones. And there are no known aliens yet. Music is accessible though. If I had any service in 1984, I could play you any song any time from anyone. I could listen to “Wanna be Startin Somethin’” for 3 days straight if I wanted to. All I’d have to do is type it in and press play.” His eyes sparkle in awe of the future. He opens his mouth to ask more questions, but Jermaine and another man enters the room before he can get a word out, “Come on Mike, we need to finish the commercial. This is an EMT we had on site, he’s here to fix her ankle.” As Michael leaves his seat, I grab his hand. “Please, don’t let them turn the pyrotechnics back on. Please.” He nods and pats my hand before leaving the room. The EMT removes my new boots and my ankle swells before my eyes, no longer constrained in the tight leather. We make small talk as he works until the commercial is done recording. 

[hobeymakar]

Unapologetically | C. Makar Part 5

Previous Parts: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

Chapter word count: 4,076 words

A/N: I know it’s been a bit since I last posted, but I made up for it with a long chapter. Next chapter will officially be the start of the playoffs and it will be very much worth the wait. As always, please like and reblog if you enjoy. Any and all feedback is always greatly appreciated

Shoutouts: @pizzasloot​ @grenawitka​ @hockey-and-wine​ as usual for being amazing and always cheering me on in the gc!

Warnings: swearing

-

Taty wakes up the next day and sees that Cale isn’t beside her. She checks the time and sees that it’s 11:40am, meaning he’s at practice. She goes to the bathroom to start her morning routine. She then goes to the kitchen to make herself some breakfast. She sees a note on the island table.

“Babe, I left for practice. I should be home around 2,” read the note.

She makes herself some coffee and another reboltido. She cleans up the kitchen and then heads to the bathroom to shower. She showers and changes into a New York Mets shirt and joggers. She also brushes her hair and leaves it out. She goes to the living room and starts planning out what she’s gonna talk about for her next podcast episode, which she’ll be recording later on that night. Before she knows it, Cale comes home with his gear bag in tow. He goes straight to the balcony to air out his gear before making his way over to Taty.

“Hey baby, how was practice?” she asks, kissing him.

“Hard and really long,” he replies, causing her to snort.

“That’s what she said,” she giggles, causing him to roll his eyes.

“You’re such a child,” he chuckles, heading to the kitchen.

“Don’t forget I’m older than you, bud!” she retorts.

“By two years only!” he bites back, grabbing a Gatorade bottle from the fridge.

“Anyway, did you have lunch?” she asks him.

“Yeah, I ate at the rink,” he informs her.

“Good. I’m gonna record the podcast. Is it okay if I record out here?” she asks.

“Of course. I’ll just be in the room. Might even take a nap,” he replies.

“Alright, I should be done after an hour,” she informs him.

“Take all the time you need, babe,” he assures her.

He heads off to the room and she sets up her laptop and her mic on the kitchen island. She starts recording and her focus for the episode is previewing the playoff matchups in the Western Conference, since the episode prior focused on the Eastern Conference. She breaks down every matchup talking about each team’s depth at forward, defense, and goaltender.

“The next matchup I’m gonna break down is the Colorado Avalanche versus the Winnipeg Jets. I personally think Colorado easily wins this series and this has nothing to do with my bias. Colorado is just the better team overall. In offense, Colorado has the slight edge, although Winnipeg has some great scorers like Scheifele, Laine, Connor, Ehlers, and Wheeler. In defense, Colorado has the edge and it’s not even close. Colorado has one of the best defensive corps in the league, with Makar, Girard, Graves, Johnson, and Cole. In goal, however, Winnipeg has the edge and it’s not even close. Hellebuyck will be a top 3 Vezina finalist again this season, after winning it last season. However, if Hellebuyck gets hurt, then the edge goes to Colorado.”

She does the rest of the Western Conference matchups in the 1st round, while also talking about key injury news in the league. After almost an hour, she finishes recording. She removes her setup and goes back into the room, to see Cale scrolling through his phone while laying in bed.

“I just finished recording. I’ll probably edit it later tonight to post it tomorrow,” she informs him.

“Speaking of tonight, do you mind if I take you out on a date?” he asks, sitting up.

“Of course not, where do you have in mind?” she asks.

“It’s a surprise,” he smiles, causing her to whine.

“Just a little hint please!” she cries out.

“You’re gonna love it and have fun. I promise,” he assures her.

“What time are we going? I need to get ready,” she explains.

“I was thinking 6, but we can go whatever time you want. The place we’re going to is open pretty late,” he informs her.

“Alright. I’m gonna start getting ready,” she informs him.

She grabs her flat iron and her make up bag and takes them to the bathroom. She turns on the flat iron and re-touches her hair while she listens to music on her phone. After her hair is re-touched, she starts working on her makeup. She puts on minimal makeup, since she’s not a big make-up person. She then goes to the room and sees Cale is dressed in a super casual outfit.

“Should I dress comfortably then?” she asks.

“Yes, dress comfortably because we’re gonna be doing something a little athletic,” he informs her.

“Are we going roller skating?” she asks, knowing how she can’t skate to save her life..

“I’m not telling you,” he smirks.

“You’re the worst!” she whines.

“You’re gonna love it, trust me,” he assures her.

“I do trust you. I just don’t like the fact that I don’t know where you’re taking me,” she informs him.

“I know, which is why I’m not telling you. It makes it more fun,” he smiles.

She sticks her tongue out at him in response.

“Go change, babe,” he replies, ignoring how she stuck her tongue out at him.

She changes into her Nolan Arenado Colorado Rockies shirt, black leather jacket, jeans and ankle boots.

“You look great,” he smiles, kissing her forehead.

“Thank you, you don’t look too bad yourself,” she teases, grabbing her small purse.

They walk out to the kitchen and he grabs his keys from the counter. They leave the apartment and make their way to the parking garage. They walk over to the car and Taty connects her phone to the car, as always. She puts her music on and they head out of the parking garage and onto the streets of Denver. After a couple minutes they head onto the highway, going south and away from the city.

“How long is the drive gonna be?” she asks him.

“Like 25 minutes. The place we’re going to is right by our practice facility,” he informs her.

“Well I’ll go to your next practice so I can see it,” she informs him.

“Maybe I can take you out on the ice for a skating lesson,” he teases, knowing how you can’t skate.

“Honestly, please do. Teach me how to skate because I can’t do it to save my life,” she sighs, thinking about how many times she ends up falling while trying to skate.

After 25 minutes, they arrive at their destination, which is TopGolf.

“Babe, you remembered!” she smiles, kissing his cheek.

She had told him before they even started dating that she always wanted to go to TopGolf since they don’t have any locations near her yet. She’s shocked he even remembered that.

“I remember everything you’ve ever said to me,” he replies, kissing her forehead.

He parks into an empty parking spot and they both get out of the car. They walk into the building and get their temperatures checked right away. They’re cleared to stay and go up to the front desk. Cale rents out a bay for the both of them. They’re escorted to their bay and given their equipment.

“You wanna go first?” he asks.

She goes to the tee with her club and puts a ball on the tee. She goes into her stance and lines her club up with the ball.

“You want me to help you with your swing?” he asks.

“Are you trying to say my stance is bad?” she scoffs, shooting him a glare.

“No babe!” he immediately responds, backtracking.

“That’s what I thought,” she adds, watching how he stays silent.

She lines her club up with the ball again before taking a big swing. She watches as the ball goes super far. 

“Great swing babe! It went 295ft,” he informs her, as she makes her way to sit down.

“Let’s make it a competition to see who can hit it the farthest. Winner gets to control the music in the car and gets to pick the movie we watch tonight,” she suggests.

“Deal,” he nods.

He gets up and goes to the tee with his club and puts a ball on the tee. He goes into his stance and lines the club up with the ball.

“Babe, you want me to help you with your swing?” she asks teasingly, making fun of what he said earlier.

“Fuck off,” he groans, shaking his head.

She just laughs in response as he takes his swing, hitting the ball.

“Fuck, you threw me off! That was a terrible swing,” he groans, walking away from the tee.

“It wasn’t terrible, babe! It went 242ft,” she assures him.

“That’s fucking terrible, babe,” he replies, shaking his head in disappointment.

The two go back and forth and after an hour, Taty is crowned the winner.

“In your face, eat shit!” she yells in his ear.

“How are you so competitive?” he asks in disbelief.

“I grew up with 3 sisters. I’ll always be competitive,” she informs him.

The food that they ordered arrives and they eat it, while discussing Cale’s day off tomorrow before Game 1 on Wednesday. They finish eating and return everything back to the front desk, before leaving. They go back to the car and Taty connects her phone to the car.

“I had a great time by the way. Hopefully with practice, I’ll be able to go to a real golf course and dominate someday,” she replies.

“I can totally help with that,” he replies, backing out of the parking spot.

“If my dad heard me talking about going to a golf course, he would be so disappointed,” she giggles.

“Why?” he asks, driving out of the parking lot.

“He hates golf, like absolutely hates it. He thinks it’s the most boring thing ever and doesn’t even think it should be called a sport,” she explains.

“He just needs to try it once and then maybe he might change his mind,” he suggests.

Taty starts singing along to the music playing through the speakers, while Cale gets back on the highway to head back to the city. 

“Babe, I found this restaurant that I think you’ll really enjoy. It’s a bit of a drive since it’s pretty north of the city, but I want to take you there anyway tomorrow night. Do you want me to take you there tomorrow night?” he asks.

“Of course! I expect you to take me out all day tomorrow,” she informs him.

“Oh I will. I haven’t taken you really anywhere around the city and I already know the places you’d enjoy,” he assures her.

“10/10 would boyfriend again,” she smiles, lacing her fingers with his over the center console.

After half an hour, they arrive at the apartment complex and park in the garage. They make their way up the elevator and to the apartment. They make their way inside the apartment Taty goes to the room to pick out her pajamas. She grabs her pajamas and heads to the bathroom. She washes her face, ties up her hair, brushes her teeth, and changes into her pajamas. She leaves the bathroom and goes to the room where she sees Cale already laying in bed, under the covers. She follows suit and joins him under the covers. She grabs the remote and cuddles into his side, as she chooses a movie for them to watch. She settles on Miracle and he chuckles.

“Miracle really?” he asks, shaking his head.

“This is my favorite movie of all time. I can literally quote this movie and besides, I got to pick the movie tonight, so deal with it,” she replies, bumping his shoulder.

“I’m only messing with you babe! I like this movie, I just didn’t think you would pick it. I thought you would pick something different,” he replies.

“Tonight I’m in the mood for this movie, so we’re watching it,” she explains, a finality in her voice.

“Aye aye, captain,” he teases.

She squeezes his nipple, causing him to yelp.

“Ow! What the fuck was that for?!?” he yells in pain, rubbing his nipple to help relieve the pain.

“For being a smartass,” she smirks, pressing play on the movie.

They watch the movie together and Taty really does quote like the majority of the movie, which generates laughter out of Cale. Before they know it, the movie is over and Taty is taking it off from Disney+.

“You weren’t lying when you said you could quote most of the movie,” he says.

“I used to watch this movie like multiple times a week. Of course I could quote the movie,” she replies incredulously.

“It’s like every day you do something that amazes me,” he responds truthfully.

“I am pretty amazing,” she smiles.

“Alright, that’s enough ego for you,” he teases.

“Oh look who’s talking about ego, Mr. I’m the Avs’ best d-man,” she teases, shooting him a look.

“Alright, you got a point there,” he replies, not even bothering to argue that.

“I always got points, babe,” she adds, yawning.

“Alright, I think that’s a sign we should call it a night. We got a long day tomorrow,” he informs her.

“You’re gonna show me around the city, right?” she asks, turning over to her side.

“Yes, babe,” he replies, wrapping his arms around her as the big spoon.

“Goodnight,” she yawns, her eyes closing.

“Goodnight princess,” he smiles, kissing her hair.

The next morning, Taty wakes up and sees the bed is empty beside her. She gets up and heads to the bathroom to brush her teeth. She then goes to the kitchen and finds Cale in the kitchen, making them breakfast once again.

“Good morning, babe. Do you ever sleep?” she asks, wrapping her arms around him from behind.

“Good morning princess. I do sleep. Remember, I always take naps during the day,” he replies, turning around to kiss her.

“Yeah I know, I’m just messing with you,” she replies, hip checking him lightly.

She gets mugs out for the coffee and plates out for the food. After a minute, he’s done making breakfast and puts the food on their plates. They sit down on the island to eat it.

“So what places are you taking me today?” she asks.

“Bold of you to assume I would give you that information,” he smirks, taking a sip of coffee.

“Why are you like this? Can’t you just tell me anything?” she whines.

“Nope, you better get used to this, because I won’t be telling you places that I’ll be taking you out to,” he replies, taking a bite out of his food.

“You’re lucky you’re hot dude,” she replies, taking a bite out of her food.

His cheeks turn even more rosy with the compliment and she holds back a giggle. They finish eating their breakfast and she cleans up the kitchen, while Cale takes a shower and gets dressed. She then follows suit and takes a shower before re-straightening her hair. She then does her makeup before changing into jeans, a black pull-over sweater, and black suede ankle boots. She grabs her small purse and goes out to the living room, where she sees Cale dressed casually, scrolling on his phone.

“You’re ready to go?” he asks her, pocketing his phone.

“Yeah, let’s go,” she replies, walking towards the door.

He grabs his keys from the counter and they leave the apartment. They make their way down to the garage and head over to his car. They get into the car and she connects her phone to the car right away. They drive off towards their first destination of the day. After 15 minutes, they arrive at their first destination, which is the Downtown Aquarium. They get into the parking lot and he finds an empty spot to park in.

“Aww babe, you really do remember everything I tell you,” she smiles, kissing him.

“So take that as your only hint then. I’m gonna be taking you to places that have to do with things you’ve told me about before,” he informs her.

“Wow so helpful,” she teases.

“Well sucks because it’s all you’re gonna get,” he teases back, shutting off the car.

They get out of the car and make their way inside the aquarium, hand-in-hand. They get screened and allowed to go in and they go up to the front desk. They buy their tickets and go inside the aquarium. They go through each exhibit and Taty loves petting the stingrays and dolphins. She’s in awe by all the different species of fish, sharks, and other sea creatures. After almost two hours, they finish going through the entire aquarium. They leave the aquarium and head towards their next destination. They arrive at the Basilica of the Immaculate Conception and park in the parking lot. They walk out of the car and walk towards the steps of the Basilica.

“I know you mentioned how much you loved visiting the Basilica in Montreal and how beautiful it was, so I figured you’d want to see the Basilica here. It’s really beautiful,” he informs her.

“A man who understands my love for the beauty of Roman Catholic churches!” she sighs dramatically, placing a hand over her heart.

“I told you I pay attention to everything you tell me,” he replies, taking her hand in his.

They finally make it up the steps and go inside the Basilica to tour it. Taty takes a million pictures and videos to send to her family, since they share her same love for Roman Catholic architecture. After 20 minutes, they finish the tour and head down the steps.

“We’re gonna walk to our next stop,” he informs her. 

They walk a few blocks to the Colorado State Capitol and take pictures, enjoying the view of the mountains from the rotunda. They head walk down towards the Colorado Veterans Monument located in the park in front of the Capitol building. They walk the few blocks back to the car and get inside.

“Babe, are we gonna have lunch soon?” she asks, looking at the time.

“Yeah, we’re gonna go to a nice little spot around here that I think you’ll really enjoy,” he informs her.

They drive back towards downtown and head over to a spot called Brooklyn’s Finest Pizza.

“Babe, I hope you know that I’m gonna be critical of this place. I’m originally from New York so I’m gonna be critical if it doesn’t taste like authentic Brooklyn-style pizza,” she informs him.

“I expect nothing less,” he replies, as they get out of the car.

They walk towards the pizzeria and go inside, excited to see that it isn’t packed. They order their pizza and sit down at a table to wait for their pizza to come out.

“Do you come here often?” she asks him.

“Not really. I usually would just come here on off days, but not every off day. Can’t really eat too much of this stuff during the season,” he informs her.

“All I’m saying is that it wouldn’t kill you guys to not be so strict with your diet plans once in a while,” she replies, sending her family all the videos and pictures she’s taken so far.

Their food comes out and they pick it up before heading back to the table. They dig in right away and Cale waits for her reaction.

“It’s really good for not being in New York. These people know what they’re doing. I’m impressed,” she smiles, enjoying the Brooklyn-style pizza.

They eat while talking about what the following day entails, since it’s Game 1 of the 1st round of the playoffs. After a while, they finish eating and clean up. They leave the pizzeria and head back to the car.

“We’re gonna go to one more spot before heading back home and then going somewhere you’re gonna really like for dinner,” he informs her.

“Now you got me excited,” she replies, looking forward to dinner.

They make their way towards the next destination, which is City Park.

“This is the biggest park in the city. It’s kind of like our own version of Central Park but way smaller,” he informs her.

They drive inside the park and make their way towards the Zoo. They park in the parking lot and make their way to the Zoo entrance. They buy tickets and make their way inside the Zoo. They go through each exhibit and Taty enjoys seeing the aquatic animals the most, like the penguins. After almost two hours, they finish going through the Zoo. They then walk back to their car and drive through the rest of the park, enjoying the view of it. They then drive back to the apartment to relax before leaving for dinner.

They arrive at the apartment and Cale goes straight to the room to nap. Taty goes to the living room and decides to get some work done, while he takes his nap. After an hour, Cale wakes up from his nap.

“Ready to go?” he asks her, coming out of the room.

“Yeah just give me a minute to put my stuff away,” she informs him, turning off her laptop.

She puts her stuff away and grabs her small purse. He grabs his keys from the counter and they make their way out of the apartment. They make their way to the car and drive off towards the restaurant.

“Just so you know, this is gonna be a pretty long drive,” he informs her.

“How long?” she asks.

“An hour,” he informs her.

“How far out is this place?” she asks.

“Over 50 miles from here, but it’ll be worth it. I promise,” he assures her, as they make their way towards the highway.

They listen to music the entire ride, as Taty takes in the view of the mountains, the further they get away from the city. After what feels like forever, but really it was only an hour, they arrive at their destination.

“Babe, why are we at a mall?” she asks, getting out of the car.

“Because the restaurant is located inside the mall,” he informs her.

They make their way inside the mall and walk over towards the restaurant entitled MY Tastee’s Cajun & Dominican Food.

“I can’t believe you brought me to a Domincian restaurant!” she smiles, not believing how thoughtful he is.

“I figured you probably miss the food right now,” he replies, as they walk inside the restaurant.

They get seated and Taty immediately opens the menu, getting excited to see what native food they have on the menu.

“Babe, they have everything here! Sancocho, Mangu con los tres golpes, Mofongo, Bistec Dominicano!” she gushes, not believing that he actually found a Dominican restaurant for her.

“Your challenge is to find me the healthiest Dominican food on the menu for me,” he smiles.

“Well everything on here is not part of your diet plan but I guess I can try my best,” she winces, knowing how unhealthy Domincan food can be.

“I’m joking. It doesn’t have to be healthy,” he assures her.

The waiter comes and they order drinks before Taty orders Sancocho (dominican soup) for Cale, since it’s like the healthiest Domincan item on the menu. She then orders rice, beans, bistec, and tostones for herself.

“I still can’t believe you found this place! They’re even playing Dominican music in here!” she gushes, taking notice of the merengue song playing in the background.

“It wasn’t easy, trust me,” he replies.

They make small talk, with Taty explaining dominican food to him. After a short while, their food arrives and they dig in right away.

“Wow this soup is really good. What type of potatoes are these?” he asks.

“Those aren’t potatoes babe. They’re roots or as we call them biberes. It’s yucca, yautia, and batata,” she informs him.

“Oh well, they’re really good,” he smiles.

She loves how flavorful her bistec is and the tostones are so crisp.

“Wow, this is good authentic Dominican food. I’m impressed,” she smiles, the food making her think of home.

“I told you it would be worth it,” he smiles.

They finish eating and pay before leaving. They head back to the car to make the trip back to the car. It’s on the ride back that she starts thinking about how she’s falling in love with Cale and it finally hits her that this is what being in love feels like and she never wants it to end.

[clan-sayeed-fic]

Let me earn your trust (Kamilah Sayeed & MC)

Previous chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8

Book: Bloodbound (property of Pixelberry Studios) Pairing: Kamilah Sayeed & MC: Amy (I do not own those characters, they're the property of Pixelberry Studios as well) Warnings: some fluff again, strong language (Idk if I’m even using strong language, English swear words seem so "light") Rating: Mature Author's note:  I'm not a native English speaker, I'm sorry for any mistakes (feel free to correct me).

This one and next chapter/s will be dedicated more to the relation between Amy and Kamilah. Let's take a rest from the drama, shall we?

~ 1700 words

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Chapter 9

Time passed.

Lily was living in Adrian's apartment, getting adjusted to her new skills.

Adrian was spending most of the time at work, taking Lily with him so she would get used to being surrounded by vampires. But most importantly, she was spending days around humans. And that was the only way to teach her how to keep the hunger under control.

Kamilah was mostly outside. She was spending half of the day at Ahmanet Financial. And the other half with Lily, showing her how to live as a vampire. Even after coming back home, Kamilah was disappearing inside her office or bedroom.

There was no time to test Amy's abilities. She was still living at Kamilah's penthouse mostly because both of the CEO's wanted to protect her. Or in other words, keep an eye on her. But Lily's adjustment was a priority to everyone at that moment.

So Amy lived there, feeling terribly alone.

During the first days, she stayed mostly in her room. But since Kamilah was out all day, Amy spent more time in the rest of the apartment. The first thing she liked to do in the morning was to let some sunshine inside by opening the curtains. Then, she basically watched TV all day till she got irked.

After a few days, Amy found out about the roof access. Since then, it was her favorite place to pass the time. She liked the feeling of the sun on her skin, the air which brushed her hair effortlessly. Besides, she had a great view of the city from up there.

It was one of those times when Amy was sitting on the roof. More specifically, she was lying there. Her eyes were concentrated on the sky, observing the clouds moving slowly.

It's been exactly two weeks since she moved to Kamilah's penthouse. Her mind subconsciously drifted to one of a few memories of their moments spent together.

It had happened soon after Amy's moving in. Equally short before Kamilah distanced herself.

*

Amy left her room after she finished decorating it. She wanted to call Kamilah and show her the result. But when she found the woman in the living room, the view made her forget about everything.

Kamilah was sitting in the armchair, with her glasses on. She wore an elegant white shirt and navy blue jeans. Her necklace was laying on the coffee table, her straight hair tucked behind the left ear so it wouldn't bother her. She looked so peaceful at that moment.

Amy saw a newspaper in her hands. It made her chuckle and lean against the wall, with crossed arms.

Kamilah lifted her gaze, glaring at the girl. It made Amy lose her sense of humor and move unsurely. Suddenly nothing seemed so silly about Kamilah reading a newspaper for Amy. She became deadly serious.

"Can I help you somehow?" Kamilah was having fun watching how Amy felt intimidated by her presence.

Amy brushed her long hair with fingers and came closer, acting insecure. She sat on the couch in front of the woman.

Amy felt an unbelievable urge to get to know her. She could already tell that Kamilah won't share with her the most private part of her life. But Amy didn't care, she wanted to talk about anything: weather, her favorite color, food.

Finally, she found the right words.

"How can you stand without the feel of the sun on your skin?" That was the first thing that came to Amy's mind since the room has been illuminated by artificial light.

"You can get used to it, with time," Kamilah answered shortly, and went back to reading, feeling the girl’s eyes watching her closely.

Amy couldn't take her eyes off her. Kamilah's features were perfect. Her ideal, a little upturned nose, high cheekbones. The full lips... so kissable. Amy shook her head, trying to avoid those thoughts.

"What about food?" She asked again, knowing that Kamilah could get irritated soon. The woman gave her an uneasy look. "What? You're not working right now, and you're not in your office or bedroom," Amy smiled, making jokes to ease the tension.

"I'm starting to regret that," the woman muttered, putting the newspaper aside. Kamilah took her glasses off, paying her full attention to Amy, "I suppose you know what we consume."

"I meant, real food," Amy was happy that she decided to talk to her, "can you eat human food? I mean, you did at the party, but does it taste the same?"

Kamilah's eyes went down on Amy's lips before meeting her eyes.

"Nothing tastes better than a blood after you're turned," she was searching for a hint of fear, but there was none. "Now, my turn," Kamilah started to like this game. "How did you manage to make Priya fire one of her waitresses?"

Amy shifted uncomfortably on the couch after reminding herself about that night.

"I just told her to let her go," Amy looked at her own hands, "she would have choked her to death."

Kamilah felt anger rising inside, she hated this stupid vampire. She couldn't understand what such a wasted creature was still doing as the Clan Leader.

"That was impressive," Kamilah said, making Amy blush.

"That was the right thing to do," she said, swallowing hard.

Kamilah kept her gaze a little longer before putting her glasses on and reaching for the newspaper again.

"And for the record, I am working," Kamilah said, "just not in my office,"

"Oh," Amy felt bad for interrupting her, she stood up quickly and turned toward her room, "I'm sorry then."

"There's nothing to be sorry about, dear," Kamilah's kept her eyes on the newspaper.

Amy smiled one last time looking at the woman before leaving her alone.

*

Amy took a deep breath at this memory.

She tried to catch Kamilah so many times since then, but she was always coming back at different hours. Mostly, extremely late hours.

Amy's thoughts traveled to the clouds. It was a beautiful day.

The sky reminded her of a painting. Each small cloud looked like a variation of brush strokes.

The colors varied between cold shades of blue and warm reds. Creating the most magnificent contrast, at the same time, leaving the feeling of warmth in Amy's chest.

***

Kamilah returned home from her work remarkably late, even for her.

She needed to deal with the problem at her company first. Training Lily took a lot out of her. Let alone the upcoming Council meeting about Adrian turning someone without permission.

As long as she didn't care that much about the newly turned vampire, she would not forgive herself if something happened to Adrian. The Council had its rules, and the ones that didn't follow them had to be punished. Kamilah was the senior member of the Council. And it was her responsibility to choose the punishment. The woman couldn't even imagine how she would be able to do this objectively when it was Adrian that they were talking about. This whole situation made her highly stressed. And Kamilah was dealing with the stress in the only way she knew.

Inside of her, not letting it show to anyone.

Kamilah stepped out of the elevator. Typically Amy would be in her room since it was nighttime. But this time, something was different. At first, she saw a faint light coming from the living room, then she heard a TV playing.

When the woman went inside, she saw Amy curled on the couch, asleep. Kamilah smiled softly at this view since she didn't see her for a long time. She approached slowly and turned off the TV. Kamilah grabbed the blanket to cover Amy's body when the girl moved, waking up.

Amy opened her eyes slowly. Kamilah was unsure what she should do at this moment. Feeling weirdly unsettled, she decided to leave the girl alone. That's when Amy lifted herself on elbows and spoke to her.

"I was waiting for you," she reached for the phone to check that it was 2 a.m.

"For what reason?" Kamilah was not prepared for Amy to say something like this.

"I'm going fucking crazy in here," Amy cursed and rubbed her eyes, trying to wake herself up.

"I'm certain that this talk can wait till morning." Kamilah frowned at Amy's attitude.

Amy stood up quickly when she saw that Kamilah was on her way to hide in her office again. She could not let this happen.

"No, it can not," no response, "Kamilah!"

Amy was shocked with herself and momentarily lost confidence when she saw the woman freezing at her raised voice.

"I'm..." Amy wanted to apologize right away, but Kamilah interrupted, turning around to face her.

"Don't be," her eyes dark. Kamilah was tired after a long day, long two weeks to be precise. She sat on the chair in the dining room. "I'm all ears."

Amy regretted starting it. Seeing Kamilah so exhausted, it made her feel guilty. It was easy to say from Amy's appearance as she hung her head and stepped from one foot to the other nervously.

"It's alright," Kamilah encouraged her. "I won't bite," a forced smile.

"I mean," Amy tried to find words under Kamilah's piercing gaze. "It's not fair."

A short laugh.

"It's not fair?" Kamilah repeated ironically.

"Yes," Amy said, trying to prove her point, "I haven't seen you in two weeks. I haven't seen anyone in two weeks," she pointed out. "I'm following your rules and staying here. Even if I can leave, and you won't have a clue where I would go."

It didn't go as good as Amy thought it would. She couldn't remember the exact same words that she prepared for this conversation.

"What do you suggest?" Kamilah asked patiently.

"I don't know," Amy wasn't expecting this question. "Maybe you could take me with you to your work. Let me do anything."

"All right," two words, life-changing for Amy. "Be ready at 6 in the morning. I don't tolerate lateness," Kamilah stood up and locked herself in the office without another word.

Amy was even happier than she assumed. With a bright smile on her face, she went to bed, looking forward the next day.

Next chapter: 10

---------------------

tag list: @onyxgaytrash, @lightning-fury, @scarlet-letter-a0114, @caliseds

[titsoutforkapanen]

Giving in. Ch 1

Thank you so so much to @moozoons and @segsnbacoon for all the help with ideas. I am so excited to write this story!!

———————————————————

I waited while the facetime call was ringing. Once he answered I could already tell he wasn’t at his house.

“I’m at Tyler’s, Hazy. Can I call you back?”

“Uh no. It’s important”

“Well continue”

I was about to tell Jamie the news when I saw the face of Tyler walk up behind him.

“Damn Jamie, who’s this?” Tyler said sending me a wink. I laughed as Jamie snapped his head around to face Tyler.

“My baby sister who is NINETEEN”

“But her name doesn’t start with a J” Tyler said rolling his eyes.

“That because she was adopted you idiot. Anyways. Hazy what did you need to tell me?”

“Well I wanted to tell you that.. I WAS ACCEPTED TO UT SOUTHWESTERN!” I yelled excitedly. Jamie was soon smiling with big toothy grin.

“I’m so proud of you! and now you can live with me which means no boys” I rolled my eyes at his comment.

“Whatever, Jame. I’ll be there in 2 weeks. See you soon”

“See you soon, H”

“Yeah! See you soon Hazy!” Tyler yelled from across the room.

ONE MONTH LATER

I was sitting on the couch with Jamie playing video games when Tyler walked into the house.

“Hey Jame, little Jame” Tyler said sitting beside me, closer than necessary. Ever since I moved here Tyler had been hitting all the time, despite me shutting him down everytime.

“I told you not to call me that, Tyler” I said rolling my eyes trying to pass Jamie on Mario Kart. “Fucking A Jamie why did you throw that shell at me?” I grumbled. I felt a hand slowly run down my arm and underneath my blanket. I whipped my head to my right looking directly at Tyler. He sent me a wink as he rubbed my thigh. My whole body tensed but before I could do anything I felt my controller shake and Jamie cheered.

“See Hazy, I told you I would win” Jamie said laughing as he got up and walked into the kitchen.

“What ever” I mumbled. “Jamie I need you to take me to a car dealership so I can my own car mom and dad told you you had too” I said standing up throwing my blanket on Tyler.

“Actually, they just told me you needed a car not that I needed to bring you”

“I want to go places without needing to ask you, you won’t let me drive your car and never want to drive me” I said standing across the bar from him. “I also want to go skate at the rink but you won’t take me to get skates”

“I have your hockey skates here” he said leaning on the counter.

“I’m a figure skater you idiot”

“I am housing you, you have to respect me”

“You are my older brother, I don’t have to do shit” I said walking towards my bedroom. I was almost all the way up the stairs when Tyler spoke up.

“I’ll bring her to the car dealership and to get skates then I’ll show her where she can check in at the rink” He said looking between me and Jamie.

“I’m down but I have to change” I said walking towards my room to get ready.

Tyler was already in his jeep when I walked downstairs. “Here, take my card. I know you have the money for the car but just use my card for any accessories you need for the car and your skates”

“You don’t have to Jame” I said with a smile.

“Just take it, now go Tyler’s waiting” I sent Jamie a smile and walked outside. When I got into the passenger seat of the Jeep Tyler sent me a wink and a smirk.

“Ready for the day of your life, babygirl?”

“That’s almost as bad as ‘baby Jame’”

We had been walking around the dealership for an hour and a half and we still didn’t have an idea for what car I wanted.

“I told you I liked that Jeep”

“I don’t want you to copy me”

“Oh my god Tyler shut up. I’m getting the Jeep” I said signalling for the dealer.

I signed all the paper and was now the owner of a 2016 Jeep Wrangler. Tyler and I walked out onto the lot and towards my new Jeep. “Are you going to show me the way to the shop so I can get skates?”

“Yeah, just drive over to where I’m parked and follow me” I got in my jeep and smiled to myself knowing that this was mine and that I didn’t need to ask Jamie to drive me places anymore.

INSTAGRAM

Hazy_Bennn: I got my very own car today! Photo creds to @tseguin92 “you look stupid” “just take the picture, Tyler”

We had finally finished shopping and were on our way to the arena. I had somehow convinced Tyler to ride with me. The drive to the arena was going to be about 20 minutes. We were listening to the music when I felt a hand on my thigh. I tore my eyes from the road to send Tyler a warning look. “What are you doing, Tyler?”

“Trying to show you that I like you”

“What are we? 12?” I laughed pushing his hand away. I couldn’t deny that Tyler was attractive. I had always thought so but I never said anything since I knew Jamie would either beat me or Tyler, or both.

“Come on, you can’t tell me you’ve never thought about us”

“I’m 19”

“Almost 20 actually”

“Jamie would beat us”

“He would not”

“Stop, Tyler. Nothing is going to happen. It never will”

“Okay, okay fine” he mumbled as he turned the music back up.

Tyler and I had been skating for about an hour and my feet were starting to hurt from the new skates. We walked back to the locker room so I could take my skates off. “I’m tireddddd will you untie my skates for me?” I begged holding my feet out.

“Yeah fine, hold on” he laughed as he took his shirt off and used it to wipe the sweat off his forehead. I opened instagram and started recording.

“Wow y’all look at this…. A shirtless Tyler Seguin” I laughed as he connected his phone to the bluetooth speaker across the locker room. He started dancing to the song that was playing as he walked towards me. “You’re a horrible dancer” I joked zooming the video into his face. He kneeled down in front of me and started to untie my skates. When he was done he went and sat down in his stall and started to undo his own skates. I was reading something on twitter when I heard Tyler cough. I looked up and saw he was already looking at me.

“Wanna come sit on my lap and talk about the first thing that pops up?” I laughed at his attempt at a pick up line. I knew Jamie would hate me for this but I wouldn’t let him find out.

“What about doing something more than talking?” I asked walking towards him. I straddled his lap and put my hands on his chest. Tyler just stared at me with a surprised look. “It seems like you’re all talk, babe” I whispered running my hands over his abs. It wasn’t long till I felt his lips on mine. His hands ran down my back till they decided to rest on my ass.

He lightly bit my bottom lip causing me to gasp so he could slip his tongue into my mouth. Our tongues were fighting for dominance and I was losing. I moaned as he rubbed his hands along my ass and hips. Tyler’s hands left my ass and ran along the hem of my shirt. He pulled my top off and started kissing down my neck definitely leaving marks in his path. My hands hovered above the top of his pants starting to unbutton them.

“Oh shit, dude I’m sorry” Tyler and I immediately pulled apart at the sound of the voice. “I mean come on though dude I thought we told you to stop bringing people down to to fuck” the voice laughed. The voice sounded familiar but I couldn’t put a face to it. I was scared to turn around so I hid my face in Tyler’s neck. “So who is the lucky girl?” the guy questioned. I knew I wasn’t getting out of it so I just hoped it wasn’t someone who knew me. I got off of Tyler and quickly threw my shirt on and sat beside him. When I looked up to see who it was that was talking I almost stopped breathing. It was Jason Spezza.

“Oh my god” I whispered sending Tyler a worried look he returned the look when Spezza turned around.

“Holy shit, Hazy? What are you two doing? Does Jamie know? What is he going to say?” I felt my heart rate quicken when Tyler spoke up.

“We were just messing around, nothing serious. We were just leaving” he said grabbing my skates in one hand and taking my hand in his other.

“What if he tells Jamie, Tyler?” I asked feeling my anxiety building.

“He won’t it’s bro code”

“I don’t think bro code counts when your captains little sister is involved” I said as a tear rolled down my cheek.

“He won’t say anything and if he does it was just a one time thing. We’ll be okay” Tyler said reassuring me as he wiped the tear away with his thumb. I wasn’t sure what was going to happen now. But all I could do was hope for the best.

INSTAGRAM

Hazy_bennn: Jamie and I tried to have a sibling day but not only 20 minutes in he started making fun of me so wow. I love being the youngest sibling.

Jamiebenn14: congrats to this idiot for buying her own car the other day. I would say #proudbrother but as soon as she was home she annoyed me.

[chicksung]

Red and White Roses- PJM Hanahaki Disease AU Chapter 2

Genre: Hanahaki AU, a little bit of fluff and quite a bit of angst

Pairing: Hanahaki Park Jimin x Hanahaki Reader

Warnings: Mentions of anxiety. depictions of blood and gore, throwing up flowers and panic attacks

Word Count: 4,011words, 21,753 characters

Post Date: 10/02/19

Summary: Everything in your life is spiraling out of control, your parents are getting divorced, 2 of your younger siblings are moving in with your father, you have to find an apartment and continue your English major at college and panic attacks are becoming a frequent thing. But what the cherry on top of your anxiety built cake? The name engraved on your right hand and the flowers growing in your stomach.

A/N: Hey there, here’s chapter 2 of RAWR. I really enjoy writing this so let me know what you wanna see in the future. <3

Chapter One II Chapter Two II Chapter Three II Chapter Four

Previously, in Red and White Roses: 

‘He smiled and rushed over to you, pulling you into a friendly hug. You felt the tips of your ears and your cheeks flush pink at the very least. When he pulled away, he took your suitcase and gave you his sweet eye smile. The first time he spoke these words was the first time you felt the slight itch in your right hand. “Welcome back, Y/N.”’

The drive back to campus was quiet, with the occasional hum of a tune coming from Jimin. After three minutes of the unbearable silence, you reached into your backpack and pulled out your phone and earphones. You placed the small buds into your ears, unlocking your phone, searching your library of music and selecting the song that calms you the most. With the thoughts of what had happened a few weeks ago still plaguing your thoughts, you sighed deeply at the calming tune and vocals and stared out the rain splattered window. Jimin looked at you, unbeknownst to you and studied you for a few seconds before turning his gaze back to the road. The calming voices swimming in your ears made your eyes feel heavy and your body suddenly felt as if a tonne of bricks had been placed on top of it. You slowly closed your eyes, pressing your head against the window, letting the soft voices lull you into a deep and peaceful sleep, making up for the 2-4 hours you had been getting for the past few weeks.

XXX

You are woken by your shoulders being shook lightly. You lazily open your eyes to be greeted by Jimin’s round and soft looking face. You sit upright, pausing your music, shutting off your phone, tugging out your earphones and frantically shoving them into the front pocket of your backpack. You unbuckled your seat belt and got out of the small silver car, grabbing your backpack as you stepped out. Jimin stood there, chuckling lightly, your suitcase in his hands. You felt an unfamiliar sensation on your right hand but ignored it and grabbed the suitcase from him. You were now in the parking lot behind your dorm building, where a few cars were dotted around but not many. You fumbled for your keycard, scanning it and letting you both inside. You dropped your backpack and suitcase at the foot of your bed, flopping onto it when the weight from your shoulders were lifted, a familiar warmth flooding your body. You realized how much you missed being in your dorm, the light cream color of the walls, the dark blue duvet with yellow stars covering it you brought from home, the soft light pink bear your friend, Hoseok, bought for you. You felt a poke at your shoulder followed by a warm and soft voice of your dorm mate, Jimin. 

“Jimin-ah, leave a girl to sleep, will you?” You grumbled, turning over and hugging the bear close to your chest. He giggled again, and turned you back over.

“Not at all. Come on, you said you had to tell me something last night.” You internally face palmed yourself, remembering you had originally planned to confess, but a more important matter filled your thoughts.

“O-oh, yeah. You see, the thing is, once we’ve finished this semester, my parents want me to move into an apartment. I don’t understand why but they said they would pay rent for me at least for the first 6 months until I find a more stable job. I just wanted to see if...you would be willing to share the apartment with me, you know how much I hate being alone, let alone living alone?” You pretty much whispered the last part, but Jimin heard and nodded his head. You began to smile when you felt the same sensation from the train station and the parking lot. You were too distracted looking at Jimin to bother looking down at your hand. You turned to the clock. It being 10:17pm, you were extremely tired and almost were unable to focus on a single raindrop on the window in the small walkway that separated yours and Jimin’s bed. You slowly stumbled to the shower, running the water and beginning to undress. You finally look down at your hand and are completely shocked to what your eyes pick up on. A name, etched into your hand. You had heard about this before, how most people had soulmates, however there were people (like both your parents) who didn’t have one and were able to love without boundaries. Normally, this wouldn’t affect you, except the name that was written on your hand was in a handwriting similar to your own and a name you knew too well. Park Jimin. The other thing that worried you was the color, normally the colors the names were in were about how deeply you care about them and how likely you were going to end up with them. Your color, red. The color of love and passion, yet also the same color as the crackling fire in your emotions. No matter how many times you had denied your feelings and tried to put out the fire, the fire would instantly reignite. However, this also meant you were very unlikely to ‘get over’ this person if they rejected your feelings. You shook the creeping feeling of anxiety from your head and continued to undress, entering the shower 30 seconds later. The warm water hit your skin like soft flower petals, washing away any scary or unhappy thoughts from your head. You came out of the shower, throwing on the light pink oversized T-shirt and powder blue shorts that you wore as pajamas. You walked out into your room, where you see Jimin, sitting on his phone, scrolling on some form of social media, making you giggle to yourself. “Nothing has changed since I left for Winter Break.” You thought to yourself as you somewhat waddled your side of the room, flipping back the covers and diving inside. The warmth from your blankets were some sort of comfort for you, always had been, considering you were studying under one of the most difficult majors in the university as a native Korean speaker. You felt a heavy sweep of tiredness flood throughout your body, weighing down your eyelids and letting you slip into a deep and dreamless state. 

You woke up with a slight annoyance in your mood, how dare the sun disturb you from your slumber. You mumbled a few curse words before getting out of your warm bed, the cold air hitting your bare skin, making you mumble more curse words. You headed towards the bathroom and took a quick, warm shower (which honestly almost made you fall asleep in the shower) and changing into grey jeans, a striped sweater and a black beanie. You had no desire to go out today, but you knew you had to find a job, and the key part of getting a job is getting out of your dorm room. Thinking of how quiet the dorm was, you realized that your dorm mate was nowhere to be found, when you saw a bowl of still warm oatmeal and a note placed beside it.

“Y/N,

I’ve left early, and I didn’t want you to worry, nor get hungry so I sneaked you some food from the cafeteria, also, my friend, Yoongi, is looking for some employees to work at his small music shop down the street. I think you would be a perfect fit. Yoongi is pretty laid back and chill so I think you and him will get along just fine. His shop is next to the cafe we always go to after class, hope to see you working there soon.

~ Jimin”

You almost choked on your oatmeal when he had pretty much found you a job already. You finished up as quick as you could, fumbled around your desk to find a copy of your resume. You eventually stumble across it, underneath a few English Language workbooks. You picked up your backpack, phone and earphones and headed out the door (thankfully remembering your key card). You walked down the almost silent and deserted street, considering it was still pretty early, and there weren’t many students back from Winter break, as there was still 3 more days left. You smelt the familiar smell of a mocha fill your nose as you realized you were passing the cafe Jimin mentioned in his note, and, low and behold, there was the small music shop next to it. An equally tired man with deep red hair was just unlocking the door to which you presumed was his shop. You quickly walked up to him, hoping you weren’t bothering him.

“Excuse me sir, are you Yoongi?” You asked politely, clutching your resume to your chest. The man stared at you for a second, although you could practically feel his eye tear holes into your soul.

“Depends who’s asking.” He replied in an almost monotone voice. He pushed the door open and walked inside, you not too far behind him.

“I’m a friend of Jimin’s. He suggested this job to me, saying I would be a perfect fi-” You were cut off by Yoongi’s voice, but instead his voice filled with something you could only describe as joy.

“Say no more, I take it that you’re Lee Y/N?” He said, leaning against the counter in the small shop, covered wall to wall in different posters and record covers. “I’m Min Yoongi, owner of this store. I talked to Jimin last night, he talked about how you were looking for a job, something a little more stable than a waitress.” He held out his hand to you as he spoke, his dark eyes, which you swore were soulless when you first looked at him, were now warm and inviting. You smiled at his words, knowing that when he brought up your work problem that you knew he was telling the truth. Only Jimin knew that you had been a waitress, only he knew that you didn’t work at the quaint cafe next to the very music shop you stood in at this moment in time, only he knew why you came home one night and began bawling your eyes out, only he knew about the sexual harassment your manager put you through. A small smile crept across Yoongi’s face as he went behind the counter and pulled out an ID card from a drawer. You were somewhat surprised that he had been able to produce with little notice. You took the lanyard in your hands, flipping it through your fingers and looking back at Yoongi. It had your birthday, your name, your hometown and series of number which you assumed was your ID number, however there was a vital piece missing from the card, your photo. Yoongi realized your confused gaze and was pulling out a camera.

“Would you mind if I took your photo, for professional purposes?” Yoongi asked, pulling out a cord while typing and opening a file on the computer next to the cash register. You smiled, nodding once before walking towards him.

XXX

A couple hours had gone by, you had an updated ID card which gave you access to the backroom, storage and the break room, you had made anew friend, who was also your boss, you had Jimin drop by and who was somewhat stunned that you had taken up his suggestion and smiled when you enthusiastically showed him your lanyard which was attached to your ID. You were currently by the records, flicking through them and categorizing them in alphabetical order when the door opened to see a posh looking girl, holding what looked like a Gucci bag and sporting a tight top and jeans, pulling them off spectacularly. She, however, was also sporting a bitchy look, which made you somewhat nervous and a wave of anxiety washed over your previously happy demeanor. You swallowed hard and worked up a smile before turning to her.

“Hello, can I help you at all?” You asked politely, brushing a lock of your hair behind your ear. The girl looked you up and down with a somewhat disgusted look, before shifting her center of gravity from her left leg to her right.

“Yes, I guess you can. I’m looking for Yoongi, is he here?” She pretty much spat at you, looking at you ask if you were some sort of peasant. You were taken aback by her tone of voice but brushed it off as an accent (even though you knew damn well it wasn’t an accent).

“Oh sure, he’s in the back, whom shall I say is calling?” You say sweetly, your fingers toying on the edge of your sweater nervously. She tutted impatiently and reached for what at first seemed your arm, making you step as a reflex, before she reached for your ID card. Her sudden movements scared you before you dashed off to the backroom and scanned your ID, scrambling inside the room and shutting her out. You could hear her what you could only describe as clawing at the door. You took a few seconds to slow your heart and breathing before turning around, meeting a somewhat surprised Yoongi. You widened your eyes in surprise, meeting his eyes.

“Y/N, are you okay?” He asked, taking a slow step forward as to not scare you more. You thought about nodding your head but you just kept still, your shaky breathing was the only thing that could be heard. He placed a hand on your shoulder gently, looking into your eyes warmly. You took a deep breathe and explained everything to him. He just listened, not interrupting or moving from his position. 

“What did she look like?” He asked, removing his hand from your shoulder, his gaze fixated on the door. You explained her appearance and you knew by the annoyed and somewhat disgusted look on Yoongi’s face that she wasn’t exactly his favorite person. He took you by the wrist and opened the door, being faced by the girl, who’s face turned up into an annoyingly wide smile.

“Oppa, you’re here! I just thought I would drop by to say hello and-” Yoongi cut her off and even though his back was to you, you knew his eyes were cold and uninterested.

“-and disrespecting my employees while you were at it. I thought I told you that I didn’t want to see you again, Krystal.” He blurted out, the coldness in his voice even sent chills down your spine. Her mouth opened slightly in shock, but she covered it up by smiling again.

“I thought you had a little bit too much soju that night, so since you’ve been sober for a few weeks now, I thought you’d want to see me.” She exaggerated her words by bouncing on her toes. Yoongi rolled his eyes, letting go of your wrist to rub his temples in frustration. The girl apparently named Krystal moved her hand up to touch him, but he swatted it away coldly, earning a surprised sound to come from her.

“One, I had not been drinking that night and I meant every word I said that night and two, that does not excuse you from disrespecting my employees. She is so much better than you are, sweet, smart, kind.” He emphasized on the last word, making her mouth hang open. She had tears in her eyes but when she looked at you, a burning hatred was visible in them. 

“But oppa, she was being rude and disrespectful to me, she called me a money whore and a slut.” She fake cried to Yoongi, sending a smug smirk your way. Yoongi let out a long sigh, knowing that tone in her voice.

“Krystal, leave before I call the police again, I could hear everything from the back room. Now, go!” He demanded, rubbing his temples, pointing towards the door with his free hand. Krystal scoffed, shooting you a cold look before stomping her way out of the store. Yoongi let out another sigh, turning to you with soft eyes. “I’m sorry about Krystal, she’s been harassing me for a while. She’s my...ex. She can’t seem to wrap the idea that we’re not together around her head. I just didn’t know how desperate she was.” He apologized, looking down at the floor. You chuckled lightly, making him look up.

“It’s okay, really. I knew the second she walked in the door she was the bitchy type.” You giggled, making Yoongi smile. You flashed him one last smile before making your way to the storage room, grabbing a box of vinyls from the top shelf.

XXX

It had been a week since you started working for Yoongi, but it felt more like being paid to hang out with friends. Jimin started to show up more and more often, but something was off about you whenever you were in 5 feet of Jimin. You felt sick, like you were going to throw up at any second. Today was one of those days. You had been finalizing the details of shipment of some newly released albums from various genres and artists when you heard the door open, thanks to the little bell sat just above the door. You looked up from the computer to the door from behind the counter to be met with Jimin’s beautiful eye smile. You felt the same sick feeling in the pit of your stomach you had been having for a few days now, but you tried your hardest to push the thought and feeling away. 

“Y/N, good to see you settled into your new job so quickly. By the way, have you seen Yoongi, he said my order had arrived.” Jimin cheerily spoke, almost bouncing on his heels with excitement. You smile weakly and managed to squeak out a ‘I’ll be right back’ as you rushed off to find Yoongi. He was in the break room, his earphones on his ears, funnily enough. You saw his eyes were closed, his head bopping in time to the beat in his ears. You walked over to the sprawled-out Yoongi on the couch and tapped his shoulder, earning his attention.

“Yo, what’s up?” He asked, taking out his earphones and placing them on the coffee table in front of him. You felt a wave of cold sweat break out over your body, the feeling in your stomach growing worse and worse. You swallowed the lump in your throat and attempted to clear it.

“Jimin’s here, he’s here for his order.” You barely spoke over a whisper, your weak voice cracking at certain points of your short sentence. Yoongi looked at your face, how your cheeks were completely drained of color, how scared you looked.

“Oh, okay. Hey, are you okay? You’re paler than me.” You smirked slightly at his words, but his eyes told you he was dead serious. 

“Yeah, I’m fine, just feeling a bit unwell, that’s all.” You blurted out as an excuse, trying to brush off the feeling in your stomach for what felt like the billionth time. You walked to the corner of the room where an open cardboard box laid, several pre-ordered albums sitting in plastic sleeves. You scanned the albums until you came across the name that was also engraved into your right hand. Park Jimin. You grabbed it and walked out of the room, Yoongi hot on your heels. You handed Jimin his album with your right hand, the sleeve pulled down so that it covered his name on it.

“Sorry it took so long.” You whispered out an apology, your gaze fixated on your black high cut Converses. You heard him giggle and take the album from your hand’s sweaty grip.

“It’s alright, Y/N-ah. It’s here now and that’s all that matters.” Jimin reassures you, placing his hand on your shoulder. His touch alone makes you feel like you could vomit right then and there. You swallowed hard, trying to subside the feeling again. A beeping sound was heard from Jimin’s watch, signalling the close of his lunch break. “Aish, I’ve got to get back to work, I’ll be back here to pick you up at 5, Y/N. See you then.” Before you could protest, Jimin walked out the door and towards his car. You felt your entire body shake, your knees threatening to give out. You sprinted to the break room then to the bathroom. You collapsed in front of the toilet, dry heaving into it, waiting for the dreaded mix of what you ate for breakfast and lunch to come back up. Yoongi burst in just as you cough up something you certainly weren’t expecting. A single white rose petal. You were stunned, confused mainly, but you didn’t have enough time to process what just came up when you started to dry heave again, but nothing coming up. After a while of dry heaving, your throat felt like it was on fire, the burning becoming extremely painful and uncomfortable. You had somehow squeaked out to Yoongi to get you a glass of water. He returned, a glass of the transparent liquid your throat craved so badly. You snatched the glass from his grip, gulping it down quickly. Yoongi let you down the water and set down the glass before pulling you into a warm embrace, stroking your hair lightly. Even though he hadn’t known you for very long, you felt comfortable with him.

“So, do you know what this means?” Yoongi says almost emotionless, his back pressed against the wall with you wrapped in his arms, a singly flower petal in front of the toilet to Yoongi’s right. You slowly shook your head, unintentionally burying your head further into his chest. “This means you’re sick from love, and I think I have a good idea who caused this.” He whispered into your hair, somewhat coldly. You had known about this disease, but you never known what caused it, as your older brother had it when he was 15, but as his 9 year old sister, he told you that it meant that he was destined for something spectacular. A few moths later, he was found dead on the bathroom floor by your father. 

“What do you mean you know who it is, Yoongi-ah.” You whispered into his chest, almost being able to hear him roll his eyes at you. He pulled you away from his chest, holding onto your upper arms and staring at you with concerned eyes.

“Come on Y/N, don’t be dumb. You clearly have been feeling this way for ages, but the feeling has finally reached the surface.” Your eyes stung with tears, your thoughts feeling cloudy and intoxicated by the feeling and look of the pure white petal on the floor. White roses, your favorite flowers. They had always been your favorite, ever since you were a little girl. You never knew why, maybe the sweet scent, the soft touch of the brush of petals or maybe the bright white color., who knew. But the more you stared at the petal, the more you felt a distaste for them. You looked at Yoongi, with tears tracks running down your face.

“Yoongi, what do we -I- do?” You whimpered, your hair hanging in front of your face like a curtain.

“There are only two options really, wait for Jimin to fall in love with you or if it becomes too much, we surgically remove it. The second one’s not as simple as it sounds, it also removes your feelings for that person and maybe your ability to ever love again.” You took a deep, shaky breath, brushing your hair behind your ear.

“What happens if neither of those happen?” You asked, anxiety washing over your body like a rough sea on a stormy night.

“Your lungs fill with petals and flowers, stems, or in your case thorns, grow around your heart, weakening you by the day until one day, you die.”

Chapter 2 finish

Author’s End Note: Hey, this took me about 4 days (technically nights aka about 2 hours each) to write, but I like the build up, hope to post Ch. 3 soon

Love you Taecups and Suga Kookies <3

[hanalwayssolo]

Somewhere Between The Music and Lyrics: Ch. 2 - End

A/N: Songs featured for this last half are: Jordan Rakei’s Eye to Eye, Justin Timberlake’s Say Something, Tori Kelly’s I Was Made For Loving You.

Tagging pals! @blindedstarlight @raspberryandechinacea @gowithme @valkyrieofardyn @emmydots @hanatsuki89 @noboomoon @lazarustrashpit @animakupo @mp938368 @boo-dangy @bleucommelhiver

(Links in AO3) Alternate Universes in Which You and I Belong Together: Noctis | Gladio | Prompto | Ignis | Nyx | Cor | Ravus | Ardyn

The primly cultivated front garden and the violet bougainvillea that crept up the walls of the house before you looks nothing like a recording studio. At least, that’s what you have assumed from all the films you’ve watched, anyway. You reread the address on your phone: 1130 Citadel Road. As far as your adequate knowledge of Downtown Insomnia is concerned—plus the guidance of Moogle Maps—you’re certainly in the right street. The numbers 1130 plastered by the metal railing clearly says you’re in the right lot, too. The only thing keeping you now from ringing the doorbell is the anxiety churning in your stomach like a raging sea. Overhead, a security camera is watching your every awkward move.

Maybe it’s not yet too late to turn back, you think.

And as soon as the thought leaves you, you hear the sound of your own voice belting out from a passing car, its windows rolled down and its speakers all the way up for the entire neighbourhood to hear.

Your fingers tighten around your phone. This is the fourth time you’ve heard yourself on someone else’s radio, and it is bloody jarring to say the least.

A part of you is still reeling in from everything that has happened ever since that video got out. Who would’ve thought that the band you admired from the comfort of your earphones would suddenly appear right outside your doorstep? And have you lost your mind that you agreed to collaborate on a song with a band as popular as The Lost Boys? You still wonder how on earth they can consider someone like you after one fucking cover when, in fact, you have no formal training in music in the first place. Besides, you have already been perfectly honest with them—with Prompto, most especially, since he had been the one most eager to know more about you—regarding your background and what you do for a living. Which, frankly, had been a tricky discussion since you’re not that fond of talking about yourself without the hint of self-deprecation. But you did manage. As succinctly as you could, you told the boys that you’re simply a bumbling corporate slave by day and a struggling songwriter by night, with hopes of consistently paying your share on rent and amenities with your pesky Internet-famous friends.

Maybe this is all a mistake, you think this time.

You glance at your phone again to check the time. Or rather, you’re hoping to see a message that they have cancelled the deal. But there’s nothing on your lock screen from any of The Lost Boys except the time that beams four-thirty p.m., a couple of unopened messages from Nyx (“u go blow their minds away but call me as soon as they fuck shit up” the initial sentence says, then followed by three eggplant emojis), Libertus (“drop by @ ostium’s tonight & we’ll celebrate!”) and a missed call from Pelna. Even with your friends’ show of support, you feel like you’re still dreaming. But what if this is really just a dream? What if right now, you’re actually still—

A low voice sneaks up behind you. “Can I help you?”

Startled out of your wits, you turn around and you find a tall man in a gray coat, eyeing you with great concern. He’s carrying a bag of groceries on one arm and a handful of books on the other. There’s something awfully familiar about his stern face, his silver-shaved head and magnetic blue eyes, that you cannot quite put a finger on it yet.

“I, uh—” you hesitate for a moment, scratching your cheek— “I don’t know if I’m in the right place, but would you know if there’s a recording studio nearby?”

“You’re actually standing in front of one.” The man flashes you an amiable smile. Your cheeks begin to burn red. Then, he says, “Wait, are you here for Prompto and the boys? I heard they’re expecting someone coming over.”

You nod. “Well… yes.”

“Perfect.” He jerks his head towards the gate. “I was just about to head inside myself. Please, come in.”

The man ushers you along the gravelly path, up the staircase, and into the blue door. Inside, you are welcomed by the sight of a lovely foyer, its pristine white walls tastefully decorated with framed photos and vinyl albums. A sharp aroma of black coffee wafts through the air. It is impossibly cold.

As the man carefully unloads his things on the center table, he tells you, “They should be in the booth right now. Follow me.”

You trail behind the man down the narrow carpeted hallway. You look around and you see more framed records hanging on the wall. You recognize some of it, and it’s like taking a stroll along an impressive hall of legends: The Beatles, Jackson 5, Joy Division, Nirvana, James Brown, Jimi Hendrix, and a few other names that you’re certain have made it in the Billboard charts. But you notice that most of the photos on a couple of shelves are that of the five-man band The Regalia, and you remember how your mother used to play their songs on the your old stereo, all because she could not get enough of Clarus’s vocals and...

The realization hits you like a speeding freight train.

“Holy fuck.”

The crispness of your words echoes throughout the corridor that the man turns around to look at you with a confused smile on his face. “Is something the matter?”

“I’m sorry. I, um… you’re...” You sigh, trying to quell your utter disbelief. Gods, how could you have been so blind? “You’re… Clarus Amicitia.”

His smile turns into an amused grin. “I am, indeed. At your humble service.” He regards you with a brief nod. “And you’re the fellow with the lovely voice.”

Your heart leaps into your throat. Gods. Did the Clarus Amicitia—living legend of the Insomnian local music scene—just call your voice lovely?

This is too much for you to handle in one day.

“Uh, well, I—um, thank you. Sir.” You smile at him, but you lower your eyes on your shoes, realizing that your words of gratitude came out in a torment. If Clarus had noticed it, he was kind enough to pretend that he didn’t.

“No need to call me sir—Clarus is fine.” He smiles again right back at you. You’re quite certain that your mother would fucking flip if she finds out about this.

As Clarus leads you to the last door at the far end of the corridor, you can already hear an indistinct melody and the swell of the bass vibrating from the room.

“Here we are,” he says, opening the door. “After you.”

Entering the studio oddly feels like stepping into a different dimension. From the homely elegance of the hallways, the whole room is an air-conditioned sanctuary of hardwood floors and neatly-arranged equipment: massive speakers, rack systems, audio mixers and soundboards, and a bunch of other controls you can hardly name. A pair of acoustic guitars are tidily displayed beside a black couch. Here, strangely enough, the air is thicker with the scent of coffee.

And here, behind the glass panel and amidst all the polish is The Lost Boys, oozing a velvety riff and a soulful tune, steered by a flawless voice that belongs to none other than Prompto.

It’s the birth of a star Earlier than sunset It’s the galaxy’s water Flowing like a riverbed

You hold your breath, immediately drawn to Prompto’s honeyed melodies and the guilt of poetry in the lyrics. Of all the times you have listened to their music, you immediately notice how the rhythm departs from their signature sound. Then again, they have been known to take risks, may it be in their own songs or otherwise.

This, you realize, is their true magic. The minutes seem to have stopped ticking. Behind you, even Clarus has fallen silent.

Yes they shine bright like a million Let them bleed twice for a minute Pleasure to have met you You’re my star tonight—

The music stutters into a halt when Prompto’s gaze falls on you, his eyes meeting yours. A bright grin spreads all over his face, and he waves a hand at you, beckoning you to join them.

Clarus waves back at the boys, and rests a hand on your shoulder. “Make yourself at home. Don’t be afraid to let me know if these grown ass men cause any trouble for you. My son, most especially,” he says cheekily. “And might I just say—“ he folds his arms over his chest, his voice now employing a pensive tone— “I’ve had the pleasure of listening to your rendition of Prompto’s song. All these years, and my ears have not failed me. I know a good singer when I hear one.”

A rush of heat rises to your cheeks. “You’re far too kind to me,” you say, unable to help the smile that tugs the corners of your mouth. You spare one look and nod at Clarus as he leaves, while you awkwardly make your way inside the booth.

As soon as you step inside, Prompto greets you with a warm hug.

“Glad you made it!” he says as he pulls away. You actively ignore how good his cologne smells, or whatever scent he is wearing. “I was starting to think you changed your mind.”

“No. Actually… well, I thought about not coming here,” you admit sheepishly. “I got really nervous.”

“Hey, don’t be!” Prompto says brightly in reassurance, looping an arm around you. Okay, he really does smell nice that you can actually forgive his lack of consideration for personal space.

“And you have nothing to be nervous about,” Noctis adds, fiddling with the strap of his bass guitar.

“Did my old man scare you on your way here?” Gladio asks from behind the drums.

“Oh, no. Not at all.” A lie, kind of. But Gladio looks like he’s buying it. To be fair, Clarus didn’t exactly scare you, though scare is synonymous to intimidate—because who wouldn’t be intimidated in the presence of Clarus fucking Amicitia? “Though he did say I should be careful of you,” you say truthfully.

Prompto and Noctis erupt in a gale of laughter. Even Ignis is amused. Gladio shakes his head and with an apologetic smile, he tells you, “Please don’t mind my dad. I promise, I’m completely harmless—”

“I think your father is less concerned with your inclination to violence and more on your inclination to romancing… well, anything that moves,” Ignis chides as he returns his electric guitar on a stand, taking a seat next to the speakers.

Prompto unloops his arm around you and rests it on your shoulder as he says, “Don’t worry about this monster—I got you." At that, you feel like your heart skipped a beat. You could only wish that you're not blushing like a fool. "Though best believe he’d flirt with a lamp post if you dress it right.”

Gladio quickly shoots Prompto a threatening glare, and then he smiles at you. “Please don’t believe them.”

“I can’t promise anything, but I’ll try, I guess?” You laugh, and they do, too. It’s bizarre how being around them reminds you of being around your circle of friends. You shift on your feet a little, hesitant to the comfort of their company. Then, turning to Prompto, you gingerly ask, “Um, by the way. Were you guys recording a new song earlier?”

“Oh, that?” Prompto gives you a sheepish smile. “Not really—we’re just experimenting on some of the lyrics I wrote.” His eyes widen. “Speaking of, not to put you on the spot but—” Prompto dashes to take a mic stand and sets in front of you— “I was thinking this might help you ease into… all of this.”

You glance at Noctis, Gladio, and Ignis, all three of them looking at you expectantly. You narrow your eyes at Prompto. “Are you… trying to make me sing?”

He tilts his head. “Um, yeah. What else?”

“Really? Like right now?”

“Yes, like right now.” Prompto is grinning at you. First, he smells nice and now he’s being painfully charming. “Name any song. We’d play it with you.”

You cross your arms over your chest. “Any song? Seriously?”

“Yup.” Prompto laughs. “Why, you doubt we can’t play something mainstream like Rihanna? Or Queen Bey, even?”

“No, it’s not that—alright, then.” You chew on your bottom lip, and heave a long, shuddery sigh. Static rings from the microphone. You look around and out of the corner of your eye, you spot a spare guitar—in an instant you know it’s a Les Paul, gods bless your poor ass soul—sitting beside a Steinway piano. To Prompto, you say, “Can I borrow that guitar?”

He nods. “Yeah, sure.”

You take the blessed thing, equipping it as carefully as you can. You’re finding it hard to concentrate when all eyes are glued on you. Prompto, most especially. You draw a deep breath, and release your inhibitions in a loud exhale.

Then comes the crisp strum of your fingertips against the chords. The steady pace and pulse. You catch a glimpse of Prompto smiling at you, and that unmistakeable glint of recognition in his eyes. He knows the song. The rest of the boys know it, too. And as if by some form of telepathy, Gladio prepares the percussions. Ignis tunes his guitar, Noctis readies his bass. Prompto picks up another guitar to accompany you as you sing.

Everyone knows All about my direction And in my heart somewhere I wanna go there

It’s almost frightening how easily you slip into their dynamic, as if you have been a part of them for as long as can remember. You can feel yourself slowly relax, the nerves leaving your body and aptly replaced by the swelling notes. The cadence intensifies. It is when Prompto sings along with you that a jolt of electricity runs down your spine.

Everyone knows all about my transgressions Still in my heart somewhere There’s melody and harmony For you and me tonight

This, you realize, is a different kind of sorcery. His voice blends with yours so perfectly that you see Noctis and Gladio exchange wide-eyed glances. Prompto’s eyes locks on yours, and he flashes you that charming smile of his.

And all you can think to yourself is: Where have you been all my life?

Prompto knows that this was supposed to be a temporary arrangement. Still, he finds himself stealing away most of your days.

Not in a bad way, of course. After your first session with the band, he had insisted to accompany you home—quite a long walk, sure, but you said you were fond of walking and he wanted to spend more time with you—which somehow ended up with the both of you hanging out in your couch, exchanging playlists and punch lines and feasting on your Kenny Crow’s leftovers. Thankfully, your roommates didn’t seem to mind him being around the apartment, though he could not help but notice how they would purposely stay longer by the kitchen counter across the living room just to keep a watchful eye on you. Prompto found it equal parts endearing and frightening, but he really could not blame them. If he had someone like you, he would probably do the same thing.

Every second with you, he'd always find himself wanting another. So he treasures each day with you as it drifts onto the next, and all the nights that come along with it. With the limited time you spend with him in the studio writing and making music, he would make it a point to always walk you back to your place, if this is what it takes to be with you a little while longer. If he had to admit, apart from your insane talent, he adores your smile, and how it crinkles the corner of your eyes whenever you talk about your friends or any of your favourite things. He adores it even more when you do it on occasions he tells you a corny joke or two. He adores how your eyes brighten whenever your beautiful mind works its wonders into music. But he adores your laughter the most, how it's like a soothing melody he wants to listen to on repeat, so he tries to crack you up with an abundance of his silliness just to hear that bubbling laugh.

But he has seen you at your worst, too. If he could, he would trade all of his good days just for you to overcome your bad days. He’d write all the songs for you until his hands bleed, if need be.

Such a constellation are you to him. Who would have thought that his own song would lead him straight to you? But still, Prompto wishes he had the courage to say all these things. But as his adoration for you blossoms into something else, he lets his feelings known the only way he knows how: by letting the words leak into the page, letting it dry into a song.

Even though we may be hopeless hearts Just passing through Every bone screaming I don’t know what we should do All I know is, darling, I was made for loving you

You are startled to find Prompto alone in the studio, tuning his guitar.

“Where are the others?” you ask, as if by way of greeting. You drop your things by the couch, taking a seat beside him.

“Um, they’re—they went out to buy some food! Or something,” Prompto says nervously. He avoids your eyes. Weirdly, his nervousness is making you nervous, too. “I, uh—” he takes a piece of paper from his jacket and hands it to you— “I wrote down a couple of lines to complete the chorus. You wanna give it another go?”

You unfold the piece of paper and read the lyrics.

Shit. It’s beautiful. It’s too beautiful that you cannot help but wonder to whom he wrote it for. In the weeks you have known him, you’re aware that he isn’t exactly seeing anyone. The thought of the song has been written for another person makes your heart wince.

“Wow, this is… really good, Prom,” you say as evenly as you can. “I guess whoever’s on your mind when you wrote this must be a lucky person.”

Prompto looks up at you. “Well, yeah. But I think I’m luckier ‘cause I have them by my side right now.”

A strange silence settles between the two of you. The only sound you can hear is your own heart racing in what seems to be a hundred miles per hour. You want to say something, but the words are locked somewhere down your throat.

Prompto sighs. “Look, I’d totally understand if you don’t feel the same way. I just want you to know what I feel—”

“Actually, I do feel the same way,” you say. You bite your lip to stop the smile trying to escape your lips, only to fail miserably.

“Wait, really?”

“Yes, really.”

“Are you serious—”

“Prom, if you don’t stop talking and if you don’t start kissing me right now, I’ll hate you forever.”

In that moment, he crosses the space between the two of you, cupping your face in his hands. This time, the silence sings. Its music dances at the beat of your own heart. Prompto takes his sweet time as he presses a kiss on your forehead, traveling down to the tip of your nose, and slowly but surely, his lips finally finding yours.

[madiletio]

Little Wonders | Ch.5 “Silence”

Summary: Broken and bruised, everything was unraveling right in front them. And all they could do is watch in horror.

AKA the angsty kidfic no one asked for.

 The silence that filled Red was almost maddening.

 Lance was barely hanging on. Barely surviving. Red had stopped talking to him after she had alerted him about Green. When she had told him that Green had picked up on their location, for the first time since crashing, he felt somewhat optimistic. That maybe, just maybe, his family would find him in time.

 But that was days ago, and since then there was nothing but silence.

 Part of him wanted to believe that the team, his family, were on their way to save him. But a bigger part of him was convinced that maybe Red had lied to him. That maybe, the lion could sense that he wasn’t going to get out of this alive. Not this time.

 And if that was really the case, he understood the reasoning behind Red’s lie. She didn’t want him to die thinking the team wasn’t searching for him and yet, he was pretty convinced he was going to die waiting anyway.

 His body was beginning to fail from the lack of water and food. In all honesty he was impressed he had even made it this far.

Taking his helmet off for the first time, he wiped away the sweat and dried blood from his forehead. There was no point in wearing it anymore anyway.

 “.. Hnngh.” He cringed at the pain that ran through his shoulders as he lifted up his arm.

 There was one last thing he needed to do.

 With a few deep breaths, he forced a smile and hit the small ‘record’ button on his suits control panel.

 “... If you're watching this, chances are I'm no longer here.”

 It felt almost wrong to do this.

 “-And I'm sorry. I'm sorry for letting you all down like this.” He glanced apologetically at the camera.

 “You guys were the best team I've ever had the privilege of being apart of. And you're my family.”

 They always were going to be. After all the shit they had seen, the endless battles in deep space, being defenders of the never ending broken universe- You never truly forget something like that.

 He took a minute to breathe.

 “I want you to know that I only have one regret in my life..and that's not being able to live to see Katie walk down the aisle. To not have a family with her like I've dreamed about since I first realized that I loved her. “

 He wiped at the tears that had managed to escape.

 “Katie. I love you… And I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry.”

 A red box appeared on the screen, alerting him that there was minimal charge left.

 It was time to say goodbye.

 “I know that this is going to hurt. I wish it didn't but I know that that's impossible. Mourn me but please, for all of your sakes, learn to move on in time. I-”

 The screen disappeared as the suit powered off for the final time, cutting him off entirely. And maybe the was for the best he thought.

 Because for the first time in years, he was crying like he had never cried before.

 *

 Everything about the Garrison was bullshit. That much had been obvious to Colleen the moment they had covered up Sam and Matt’s abduction as a simple ‘mission failure’.

 And yet they still continued to bullshit through everything - even after the war.

 "Colleen? Love?"

 It was nearly four in the morning. She hadn't slept until she found what she was looking for. Sam's voice was tired and she partly felt bad for waking him up, but this was something that couldn't be put off.

 "I'm sorry for waking you." She sighed. "I know that you're busy on the Atlas right now but this couldn't wait."

 She heard the rustling of bed sheets on the other end.

 "Is something wrong?" He sounded more alert than he did worried.

 "More or less. Katie and Lance haven't been in contact with me or anyone at the Garrison for over a week now. But there also haven’t been any recent paladin changes-"

 She was cut off by her sons sudden voice, making her jump in her seat.

 "They probably said 'fuck it' and eloped, ya know. Shit knows I would do that just to avoid the gossip."

 Sam could be heard groaning at his sons interruption, because even at 26 years old Matt still insisted on eavesdropping whenever he could.

 "I'm not convinced love." She smiled sadly at Matt and put the phone on speaker.

 “I managed to get ahold of the recent log dates- thanks it Iverson. They haven’t switched or contacted home base for over two weeks.”

 Sam interjected. "Want us to try and contact the castle when we get back to the milky way?"

 "Please. And be as discreet as you can."

 *

 Everyone had been quiet as they traveled in their lions to Lance's coordinates.

 It had been a easy decision for everyone on what they should do when Katie had come running through the doors, shaking from the adrenaline alone.

 They had looked up the coordinates and much to their surprise, Lance's location wasn't as far as they had feared. But because of this, it made getting to him a whole lot trickier. Because they had all agreed on not contacting the Garrison. Because with their track record, they wouldn't have done much to help Lance. And the lions were a better alternative as opposed to traveling in the castle or Atlas.

 Even if that meant it would take longer than usual.

 The more discrete, the better.

 Katie felt like her mind was going at a hundred miles per hour as the silence lingered in the lions. It was almost as if her mind was on a endless loop of ‘what ifs’.

 What if they didn't find him? Or what if he was already gone by the time they reached him?

 What if he never got to see his unborn child?

 That thought sent chills down her spine.

 "Uh guys?" Keith's voice crackled through the comms.

 Hunk yawnked "Yeah man?"

 "I see Red."

 Katie immediately became alert.

 "And it doesn't look good."

 And it wasn't. That much was obvious the second they landed their lions on the soft terrain on the planet.

 Red's outer body was completely dented and scratched - most likely from the impact of crashing. Some of her paint had been scratched off and she was tangled up in her own metal paws.

 God only knew what the inside was like.

 "Okay team," Keith's voice cut through again. "This is the plan. Pidge, we'll send you first. Out of all of us I think Lance would be the most calm seeing you first."

 She bit her lip and stood up from her seat. "Roger that."

 "Allura, Hunk, I want you to follow in after Pidge. Wait outside of the cockpit first though until Pidge gives the all clear."

 "And what about you?" Allura interjected. "What will you be doing?"

 Keith didn't waste a second. "I'm going to do a quick scan of the area before watching all of your backs."

 “All right then. Let's bring the lover boy back home." Hunk said.

 *

 They had to climb through Red's stomach hatch in order to get inside.

 It wasn't the quickest way to reach the cockpit but this was their only choice. And in this case, beggars couldn't be choosers.

 The inside of Red was a lot worse than they had thought. Cables and various shards of metal and broken parts where strewn about everywhere, leaving almost everything in sight ruined.

 "Holy shit," Hunk cursed under his breath as they made their way up to the cockpit.

 "Pidge?" Allura placed her hand on her shoulder when they reached the door. "Are you certain about going in there alone?"

 She gave Allura's hand a reassuring squeeze. "Definitely."

 Activating her bayard, she managed to pry open the sealed cockpit doors and squeeze her way through and into the room.

 And her heart immediately stopped.

 Everything was covered in red. The windows, the broken cables and metal. Everything around the chair was just red with blood.

 Tentatively, she made her way over Lances chair, and sucked in a breath when she saw the sight of him.

 She saw the infected leg and the six inch shard of metal that was stuck in the wound. She saw all the dried blood that covered him from the chin, chest and arms.

 She needed to act fast.

 "Lance...Lance are you there? Can you hear me?" She kneeled down to get a better look at him. To check that he still had a pulse.

 Placing her two fingers on the side of his neck, she was silently praying for there to be a pulse. Her hands were shaking with both adrenaline and anxiety. She held her breath, tears already threatening to fall because she couldn't find it.

 Until she did.

 Letting out a sob she gently placed her hand on his jaw and gently rubbed her thumb against it.

 "Baby you have to wake up now.” Her voice was soft.

 His brows furrowed in a light crease and he slowly started to stir.

 "Lance?"

 Lance’s bright blue eyes shot open and immediately met her gaze. She was never going to take advantage of being able to look into his eyes again.

 "K...Katie?" his voice was hoarse, most likely from the lack of use.

 "We're going to get you out of here okay?"

 Lance managed a small nod and leaned into her touch. Slowly, she leaned down and kissed him as gently as she could before pulling away. Activating her bayard, she headed back towards the door and pried it open for the rest of the team.

 They had to act fast. There was only so much Allura could do the help soothe the pain in Lance's leg as Katie began to fasten her belt at the tip of the wound. She then gave the all clear for Hunk to start pulling the metal out.

 For most of it Lance was quiet and looked at anything other than the giant piece of metal that was being pulled from his leg.

 Until a sharp pain seared through it, causing him to cry out from the pain.

 "Gotcha!" Hunk said through clenched teeth, yanking the last piece of metal out from the wound and placed it behind him.

 "Allura I need you to take off your belt too," Hunk told her, as he began to unbuckle his own. "We need to seal the wound the best way we can until get back home."

 The Altean nodded and before long Lance’s leg was being held together with the best way they had until they got back.

 "Agh..." Lance hissed at pain the moment Hunk and Allura started to lift him. "This is going to hurt like a bitch, isn't it?"

 Hunk gave him an apologetic smile in return. "Afraid so."

 All he could manage was a groan.

 *

 They were halfway to their lions when Katie suddenly realized something, and it made her sick to her stomach.

 "Guys?"

 They turned to look at her.

 "Where's Keith?"

 It was as if a bomb had gone off as the realization hit them all at once. The ground began to tremble as a ship headed in their direction. A ship they recognized all too well.

 They had been ambushed.

 "Everyone go!" Katie screamed above the loud engine that hovered above them and everyone didn't hesitate to move.

 A smaller pod began to float down towards them. They we're almost out of time.

 And that was exactly what they needed. Time.

 Her legs began to shake as she came to a sudden halt on the ground. Tears fell as she watched her family run for their lions. They were almost there.

 But before she could even comprehend what was happening, she felt a pair of hands grab her by the collar and toss her in the direction of her lion as if she was nothing but a doll.

 Pain seared through her body as she landed hard against her lion’s metal claws.

 But that was the least of her concerns.

 Her vision was blurry as she struggled to find her ground. She needed to get out of there and quickly too. At most, she needed to be in the protection of her lion for both of their sakes.

 "-Idge? Are you there?!" Hunk's voice sounded faint, as though he was talking behind a closed door.

 "I'm here," she groaned. Her head felt like it was spinning as she stood.

 Green lowered her head for her and she silently thanked Green as she climbed into her lion.

 "What the fuck is going on?" Hunk cursed, launching the yellow lion into the sky.

 Blue was still on the ground with Green. Something was wrong.      Very     wrong.

 "Hunk," Katie hissed as she stumbled into one of the control sticks. "Where's Allura?"

 There was no response from the blue paladin. Blue was still grounded and every instinct in her body was telling her Allura wasn't there.

 "Pidge we have to go!" Hunk's voice was panicked.

 Not wasting a second, she launched Green into the sky. She did a scan of the area, searching for any sign of Allura. Yet, nothing came up.

 The ship was Lotor's. Or Lotor's generals. Katie couldn't tell but one thing was for certain - this wasn't normal. It wasn't attacking them, or opening fire.

 "Pidge!"

 Maybe it was the panic in Hunk’s voice that caused her to flinch. Or maybe it was the pounding in her head that caused her to lose her train of thought as she headed in his direction.

 A loud roar came from the Blue lion as it dashed by Green and Yellow. Moments later a wormhole opened for them and they all followed suite.

 The sooner they got out of there the better.

[goodproofingwater]

Wildfire Records: Breaking America - Chapter One

Word count: 2710

Warnings: sexual content, drug abuse, alcohol abuse, yep we gettin right into it lads

Playlist:

How Soon Is Now - The Smiths

How Did We Get So Dark - Royal Blood

Press play when you see the *

For the third morning in a row, Andy awoke in a hotel room he didn’t remember booking, with a girl that he didn’t remember meeting. It was always the same these days, getting woken up by his new manager, recording for hours in the morning and then partying until the early hours. Of course, this was everything that the redhead had wanted, but it was hard to remember that when he was awoken at 7am yet again and had to maneuver himself from underneath another woman who he couldn’t remember the name of.

*“Up!” David spoke, and Andy groaned at the sound of his manager's voice, an alarm clock that he would have thrown out of the window if it had been an actual device.

“What time is it?” Andy spoke, shifting a slender leg from his body as he sat up in the bed.

“It’s 7:30, we need you up and in the studio in an hour.” David handed Andy his coffee, and the redhead let out a sigh before he sipped it.

“Fine, wait outside I need a shower.” David rolled his eyes but otherwise did as he was asked, not wanting to be a part of whatever morning routine the 26-year-old had. When David had taken the job as a manager of a new solo artist, he hadn’t realised it was going to be such hard work. Other artists he had worked with had been fresh-faced and eager; Andy was a rich boy with talent that knew it. It was a challenge to control him the way that Fieldworks needed, but luckily he had a pretty big weakness that the company were not shy to exploit.

Andy sipped his coffee slowly, glancing around the room and sighing as he saw the smatterings of powder that he hadn’t even bothered to clear up the previous evening. It was always the same, he always managed to find a girl who wanted to party just as much as him, always had the means to find what he needed. He just wished his intoxicated mind chose a wider variety of girls.

The latest woman remained sleeping, unsurprising as he could vaguely remember reading 5am on the clock after their last tryst, her auburn hair sprawled across the pillow. With her face covered, she could almost have been the woman he wanted. But she wasn’t. He hadn’t seen Victoria in over a month.

An hour later Andy was in the vocal booth singing lyrics that had been written for him by a team of writers he had yet to meet. He would have put up more of a protest if the lyrics didn’t sound so similar to Josh’s, and he wondered if that was a deliberate move. Considering the wildfire clause being in his original contract, it wouldn’t surprise him if fieldworks were making deliberate moves to replicate the sound of The Dangers with his voice. Of course, he felt terrible about this, but he knew that the boys would do well on their own.

Despite Andy’s intention of nothing changing but who they were working with, the rigorous schedule of studio time and partying (which was beginning to feel like part of the job more than anything) meant that he rarely went back to his house. The record company had given him a credit card that he used without question, and as the studios that they rented were closer to south London it even made sense that he stayed somewhere closer.

He wouldn’t let on how much he missed his friends. Sure he was living his dream in that he was recording music every day, and that music was going to be published and promoted across the world, but it felt wrong that he didn’t have anyone from home to share it with. He had full intentions of going to visit, but as if fieldworks knew, they would book in more and more studio time.

Perhaps it was for the best. If there was anything his choice of women indicated it was that he still had strong feelings for Victoria, and seeing her with Josh would only hurt no matter how happy they were together.

He hadn’t heard anything from them in days which was strange even when they weren’t close anymore. Danny always kept him up to date with what was going on when he could, and it was only a week later when Andy saw a Facebook advert for a show at the same bar they had met the girls at that he realised why they hadn’t been in contact. They hadn’t wanted him to know.

“David, I’m going to a gig tonight.” He spoke matter-of-factly, daring the man to disagree and surprised when he didn’t.

“Fine. Let’s us know where you end up so we can send a car..”

Walking into the familiar venue made Andy's stomach turn. He had come so far from the person he had been when he had first stepped foot in here, didn’t feel like the same person who had been on the stage where Josh now stood, plugging in his guitar.

He leaned against the bar as he watched them set up, pleased they hadn’t replaced him but it felt wrong to be this side of the crowd.

“Good evening everyone..” Josh spoke, flashing a smile to the crowd that waited for them, cheering. It seemed that Wildfire was still doing a great job of promoting them even after he had left. “How are we all doing tonight?”

The interaction with the crowd was much different from Andy's. Josh was polite and charming, Andy's had radiated the cocky frontman vibe he had cultivated over the years.

“This ones called How Did We Get So Dark..” *the drums kicked into the intro, Josh's fingers moving along his guitar at an impressive speed as the sound that was inherently him blasted from the speakers. He was using a pedal to switch between guitar and bass sounds, and it worked perfectly. How had Andy missed how talented his friends were? There had been so much untapped potential.

As he sipped his whiskey and leaned back on the bar, he let his eyes scan the room for the real reason he had come to this place. It wasn’t long before he found her, standing at the side of the stage holding up a phone which panned from the crowd to the stage. She was even more beautiful than he remembered, her leather skirt clung to her, a sheer black bodysuit caressing the gorgeous figure he had dreamt about only the night before. Fuck how he wished he could get his hands on her. He still remembered how her nails felt digging into his back, the taste of her skin as her head fell back in euphoria. Was she still with Josh? Could he tempt her back to him now they had had some time apart? She had chosen him over Josh first of course. Only one way to find out.

The set finished and he ordered a round, a waitress placing down a tray full of drinks and shots on the table they were sitting at.

“Oh we didn’t order…” her beautiful blue eyes met his own, and for the first time in months, he felt like he could breathe.

“Not gonna turn down a couple of drinks with an old friend are you?” He spoke, and grinned at Danny who stood, pulling him into a hug.

He hadn’t realised how much he missed his friends. Sure he knew that he missed playing music with them, but seeing them in the flesh after so long made him realise how little interaction he had had with people he wasn’t fucking or working with.

“How’ve you been man?” Josh grinned, hugging his friend, the bad blood completely forgotten as he was so happy to see him. Of course, Josh had spent a whole lot of time angry at Andy, but it was in the past now and everything seemed to work out well.

“Yeah all good thanks, recording almost every day is tiring though. How about you? You guys killed it up there! Those pedals you’re using dude, so sick.” Andy grinned and Josh and him bonded again over guitars. Andy told him all about the guitars that were in the studio he was working at, and even invited him along to see them.

“Excuse me, don’t I even get a hello?” Her voice was like honey to him as she pushed past Josh and wrapped her arms around his neck. She was clearly drunk with how open she was being with him, but considering he had done a gram to build up the courage to be here he was in no place to judge. “Hi, asshole.”

Her lips were dangerously close to his neck, her breath running along him reminding him of her filthy words as he pounded into her. The cocaine that diluted his bloodstream was clouding his judgment and he knew it, but he could have sworn he felt her hand linger on his chest as she pulled away. This prompted words from him that were loaded in ways he wasn’t sure she would understand, “Miss me?”

He smirked and she chuckled, shaking her head, “nice to see you haven’t changed.”

She passed a shot to Juliet first before doing the same to everyone else, and they all stood in a circle, clinking their glasses together in a toast before they knocked them back.

His eyes darkened as he watched her swallow the harsh liquid, and although he had missed Josh, he could still feel the tension between Victoria and himself. He would sell his soul for another chance with that beautiful woman.

The evening went even better than he had thought. In fact, though he would never admit it to anyone, he had been sure that they would kick him out of the bar. He knew the sacrifice when he signed the solo contract, but he had hoped more than anything that they would still let him into their lives. As much as he tried to make out that he didn’t care, he cared deeply for his best friends even if his actions didn’t always show it.

As if she could read his thoughts, Andy looked up and met her eyes, a blush in her cheeks telling him that she had been looking for a while. He sipped his whiskey once more, allowing the burn to push him further along the journey to deep intoxication and she looked away only to glance down and grab her drink.

“Josh..” she whispered, leaning into his neck and grazing her lips there for a second, “baby someone’s going to notice…”

The blonde had been snaking his hand up his girlfriend’s skirt almost the second they had sat down, the mixture of the adrenaline, the booze and the fact that she could see she had worn his favourite bra making it impossible for him to keep his hands from her. He now had two fingers inconspicuously pressed inside of her, and he kissed softly at her cheek as he moved them a pace delicious enough to feel amazing but slow enough that she wasn’t gasping for air.

“No-one's gonna notice if you stay quiet..” he slurred in her ear, kissing her cheek softly as his thumb ran softly over her clit.

“Fuck..” she moaned as quietly as she could, “J, I think Andy already has..” she looked over at the redhead once more, biting her lip at the look he was giving her.

“Nah, he’s been looking at you like that since he came over..” he whispered once more, ghosting his lips over her neck once more and looking up at her with a mischievous glint in his eyes.

“J..” she giggled, licking her lips and touching his hand, “later baby..”

He groaned, kissing her softly as he pulled back, “fine, but I’m gonna make you cum so hard when we get home..” he smirked against her lips and she kissed him passionately as he helped pull her skirt back down to an acceptable length.

Andy watched as the two kissed, sipping his whiskey as her azure orbs danced to him, his body alight with the way she looked at him. Did Josh notice the way his girlfriend was looking at him? The lip biting, the lust filled eyes, the glances which his cocaine clouded mind told him that she had been thinking about him just as much while he had been away? Surely not, or maybe he didn’t care enough to notice those glances? Maybe the novelty of being with someone who had chosen Andy first had worn off for him and he was getting bored?

He could have sworn he saw lust in her eyes as she sipped on her whiskey and coke, glancing at him, and she finished the last of it before she stood up. “Anyone want another?”

Andys eyes ran over his former lover, remembering how his hands had gripped her hips on the sink the first time they had slept together, and as if she could read his mind she sent a smile his way.

Watching as she walked away, his drug-addled brain told him that the smile was a sign. She had been sitting there thinking about him and now she wanted him to follow her. They could use the excuse of getting more drinks to sneak into the bathroom and fuck one last time. Well maybe not one last time, he would have her whenever she wanted him. He felt guilty for a moment before he looked to see Josh already deep in conversation with Juliet, and he wondered once more if the younger man even cared about Victoria. He didn’t know how lucky he was, and even if he was with her now, she had been Andy's first...

Fuck it.

Andy stood, swaying a little as he moved from the table to where she stood at the bar. His hand touched the small of her back and she turned, glancing up at him with an innocent expression that made him desperate to unravel her again.

“Need a hand with those drinks?” He slurred, his thumb rubbing against her back as his hand slipped further down.

“It’s fine..” she spoke, moving slightly away from him as she motioned to the tray. Victoria could tell from Andy's eyes that he was high. More pupil than colour, the brown hues that looked down at her caused a knot in her stomach that she couldn’t explain. Time had enabled her to forgive him, but even after months, it was difficult to forget that he had been so close to ruining her relationship.

“Well uh... it’s good to see you..” he bit down on his lip and she turned so that her elbow was resting on the bar, her hand on her other hip. His head was spinning being so close to her, being able to look into those eyes, being able to smell that mix of coconut and her perfume.

“It’s good to see you too..” she smiled, and just when she thought he was being genuine, his hand slipped to her waist and he pulled her close.

He had waited too long for this, had needed her more than anything and now she was here. God, she was beautiful. He had forgotten this feeling that blossomed in his chest when he was around her, and it was only increased by just how much coke he had taken before he had arrived. He had been chasing that feeling since he left, but none of the red-headed girls he had taken to bed had even come close. Andy's other hand moved to hold her face and he ignored the voices in his head that told him this was a bad idea. He felt like he could breathe again now that he had her in his arms and he didn’t care about anything else. She had given him the sign that she wanted him, right? Surely that’s why she was looking at him like that?

“God I fucking miss you baby..” He whispered almost desperately, and before she even had time to respond, his lips were on hers.

[freezingwintah]

The Pining Game

It was tricky to get all four of them to meet up. Smitty had to record and edit videos in advance just to get some free time so he could fly over. He was particularly looking forward to seeing John again.

The day has come. His flight to America to a secure and secret location went smoothly, if you dispel the discomfort of being so high up in the sky and he wasn’t fond of planes in the slightest.

So when his plane safely landed, he texted John. Anthony and Craig were waiting at the small house they rented for the weekend.

John was inconspicuously standing close by, rocking a Smitty hoodie and skinny jeans. Smitty beamed at him and moved with his suitcase towards him.

He made a face at him and strut nearer. “Look what the cat dragged in. Come here.”

Smitty yelped, astonished by John’s tight hug. He breathed in his scent, feeling as his stress and discomfort from flying earlier vanished. He returned the hug a bit late, just when his friend was letting go.

They stood side by side, just enjoying the moment of their reunion. The Canadian scanned his figure and his lips curled up. “Never knew my logo would look so good on you.”

“Don’t think too much into it. I just threw on what was closest this morning.”

“Aaaw, there you go, breaking my heart.” Smitty said a bit disheartened, to which John rolled eyes. His escort grabbed his luggage and started walking off into the general direction of exit. “What are you waitin’ for?” He exclaimed, glancing back at Smitty who only said ‘oh’ and he jogged up next to him.

...

...

...

What the hell was up with that atmosphere. This silence was just so uncomfortable. John stashed his luggage in the car trunk and the smug bastard winked at him as he held the door open for him. Smitty slipped inside the passenger’s seat next to the driver, which was taken by John. They put on seat belts, some music and they drove off from the overcrowded airport to the highway.

To keep himself occupied, he looked out the window. He rarely visited USA and when he did it was for conventions mostly, not for vacation. If he could categorize hanging out with Anthony, Craig and John as a vacation.

“Why are you so tense? I’m not going to jump your bones.” He looked at him briefly. “Well at least not now.”

“Who said I won’t jump your bones first?” Smitty challenged him, not sure how those daring words sounded to his friend. “Smitty. This... thing. What do you want from me?”

“I... look John. You’re the one who keeps on giving me signals.”

John sighed, taking a sharp turn on a highway.

“So you’re going along with it because you want to humor me. Is that it?”

He got the wrong impression, opposite of what he meant. “No! For what kind of douchebag do you take me for!?”

“I don’t know man, you like or dislike my advances. Which is it.” John’s hands shook on the steering wheel and Smitty put his left hand over his. “You know that I like you John.”

“Then what’s the problem? Are you scared of what others might think?”

“Fuck yeah I’m scared.”

John snorted. “You really need to come out of the damned closet. It’s 2018 you dimwit. They are our friends not some strangers. If it helps, we can come out together.”

“Really?”

“Yep, so don’t worry your pretty head over it. I’m here, you’re here and the next 2 days are ours.”

Smitty nodded and relaxed on the seat as the landscape was changing around them. The tension from earlier was gone. A while later they jammed together to All Star.

A bit later, when it was clear they left the city and entered somewhat rural area, John’s phone vibrated. “Can you pick it up? I’m a bit busy at the moment.”

“But it’s in your pocket.”

“Just do it, pussy. It’s probably Craig bothering me what’s taking so long.”

Unenthusiastically, he reached out and fished out John’s phone from his extremely skinny as fuck jeans. “Well, who’s calling?”

Smitty checked the caller ID, it was him alright. “It’s Craig. Should I put it up on speaker?”

“Yeah.”

So he picked up and put the call on speaker. Craig’s voice magically strengthened screamed loudly. “Where the hell are you? Are you and Smitty fucking in the backseat or something?”

Both men laughed at that. “We were, but you just had to interrupt us. Thanks for that.” John spoke up. In the background they heard shattering sounds and gasps. “No way, holy shit. REALLY!? Anthony, you owe me 100 bucks!”

Smitty decided it was best to intervene before this got out of control. “It was a joke, dudes. The traffic was horrible, we spent over thirty minutes in a long column of traffic jam only. We – we weren’t doing that. Or anything.”

Craig’s voice volume shrunk drastically. “Oh. Scratch that then.”

Anthony let out a sigh of relief in the background. His 100 bucks were safe. “Aaaanyway, are you close by or still relatively far away?” Craig kept on asking questions and John checked the GPS. “Actually we’re almost there. Maybe ten or fifteen minutes and we’ll reach our vacation getaway.”

“Okay, I’ll make you guys some coffee or some shit.” Craig hung up on them and Smitty held John’s phone.

He didn’t lie. They weren’t doing it. He liked John, but he was too afraid to take the next step. There weren’t many friendships he valued as highly as his friendship with John.

What if it didn’t work out and their friendship would be ruined. And with it, they would drift apart... he’d never ever hear his laugh, listen to him talk about deep stuff at 1 am... he’d miss him badly.

He must have delved too deep inside his mind, because he didn’t register when the car stopped and tires met the sandy earth. A beach.

“We’re here. You spaced out for the last eight or something minutes. Is it because of the call?” John’s eyes locked with his and Smitty looked at the phone he was still clutching. “No, I was just thinking. I’m fine though and I think this here is yours.” He held out his hand with John’s phone.

The man grabbed his phone, but his palm lingered on his hand. It was a very brief touch and before he knew it, John was out of the car and going outside to grab luggage.

He joined John by the back side of car, where he handed him his suitcase. Smitty looked inside the trunk. John only brought a duffel bag.

John closed off the car’s lid and made sure all doors were locked. Only then the duo made their way down to a lagoon, with a neat house standing tall on the far right end. “This is it. A pretty place isn’t it?”

“Not as pretty as you.” Smitty said, mentally smacking himself for that. He really should start filtering what he says. “I... um... that was...oh fuck it.”

John raised a brow at him, but didn’t say anything in return. Smitty saw that faint smug grin that flashed across his face.

He was stopped by two bodies colliding with his. “Finally! Smiiityyy!”  “It’s been fucking ages since we last met up!”

“Ha –hey! I’m happy to see you guys, too but I can’t breathe.” Smitty’s muttered and the guys let go. “Since we’re all here, we can sit back and relax while you and John unpack. Craig makes a nasty cup of coffee, so I wouldn’t drink it were I you.”

“Hey!” Craig seemed offended, by laughed it off. “Anthony’s right, it’s horrible. You’re better off making a new coffee or tea. Whatever, let’s just go inside for now, I’m rambling.” Craig grabbed onto John’s shoulders and they walked forward, while Anthony and Smitty were on the tail of group.

As he expected, the interior was small, but homey in its way. Nobody bothered to take off shoes as Craig showed them the rooms. Each of them had their own room, then there was the living room, a bathroom and toilet. How did they get this house rented for such a good price? It wasn’t big, but it still exceeded Smitty’s expectations.

“Alright, I’m going to unpack, I’m taking that room.” He pointed to the left end door, which was opposite of the other unclaimed room.

“Then I’ll take the right side. See you in a bit boys.” They bid farewell and they parted ways in the middle of hall. Meanwhile Craig and Anthony shared a look that spelled ‘can they be more obvious’ and departed to the living room.

John came to a conclusion that Smitty wanted him to do something, because he wasn’t gonna do it first; he was such a scaredy cat in front of their friends. No one in their big group was homophobic; not that he knew of. Maybe Tyler was, but who the fuck cares what anyone else might think.

He’s going to use those two days to the fullest. With that mindset, he quickly unpacked and decided to pay a visit to Smitty before they entered living room.

Standing in the tiny hall, he crossed to Smitty’s room with three long steps. “John, you’re really not stealthy at all. I heard your thin chicken legs crossing over, so you need something?”

That little tease.

John walked in and found the Canadian sitting on the bed, with his suitcase open. “Well? What was so important it couldn’t wait?”

In no mood to play along with Smitty’s mind games, he strolled to his side and grabbed the other man’s arm, jerking him up to stand up, next to him. “John, wha-“ he was silenced mid sentence with a pair of firm lips on his.

Smitty wanted to break away from the intrusion, but John refused to let him and his right leg slipped between the flustered Canadian’s legs, using the opening to his advantage as he laced his fingers into Smitty’s hair, pulling him in the kiss.

He felt his legs giving out on him, buckling as they landed on bed. John halted to chuckle and check if he’s okay. “Holy shit, you okay?”

“What do you think? My fucking legs gave out on me and your weight is crushing me currently.” He blurted, still a bit out of breath.

“Are you saying I’m obese?”

“Not obese, chubby in the right places. But for fuck’s sake, get off me now. This isn’t the best time and place for this.”

Smitty was right, their friends could be eavesdropping behind the door for all they know (John wouldn’t put it past them to listen in for some juicy gossip) and as much as he loved having the flustered Canadian underneath him, he propped himself up on elbows and retreated from the bed.

The confused man on the bed straightened, the repercussions of what they did still hung around him like a cloud on sunny day. “Does this mean you, me – are officially an item?”

“’An item’ who the fuck says that nowadays Smitty.” John’s words and coy smile clashed, telling the other man that he’s not the only one feeling butterflies fluttering in his stomach now.

“In all seriousness now, Smitty I’m not forcing you into a relationship or anything. I like you and I’m sure you must like me too, or else you wouldn’t have put up with me for so long. Let’s just see what this new development in our relationship brings us.”

“I couldn’t have said it better, now since we’re lovey dovey and that shit, how about we tell our friends the truth?” Smitty propositioned, standing up on his feet and walked up next to John.

“Tell them that we’re gay for each other? Heh, why not right now, babe?”

His boyfriend (he still can’t believe it happened) didn’t wait for an approval, his hand slipped into Smitty’s and they did it. They held hands like any couple would.

They left Smitty’s cosy room and headed down the small hall straight to the living room. Neither of them faltered as they casually walked in, hand in hand. “ ‘Sup boys.” John’s attempt to be suave had the desired effect.

Anthony was slurping down some soup, when he saw them as first. He spat out most of the liquid directly at Craig, who got temporarily blinded. “Oh, great! Thanks. Why did you do that?” He demanded answer, but Anthony only gaped at the two smirking dorks.

Craig hastily cleaned his glasses with his T – shirt and slowly turned around. He knew it would happen sooner or later during those two days.

So, to show support, he gave them thumbs up. “Hell yeah! About damn time, too! Congratulations!”

Anthony was still in awe. “When did you...”

“Oh, a moment ago. John was very... persuasive.” Smitty’s witty comment got Craig to snort and Anthony made a sound similar to a squished mouse. He sighed, pulling out his wallet and he gave Craig the money.

His devilish grin could only rival Smitty’s and John’s in that moment.

Anthony rose on his feet, walking up to them with a serious expression. For a brief moment, it looked like he was about to yell, but then he erupted into laughter and hugged them. “Even though I just lost 100 bucks, I’m glad you’ll stop dancing around each other.”

“And I’ll give you a good ‘ol hug too after I change. I don’t like being soaked in soup.” Mini said, flashing them a wink as he scurried over to the bedrooms.

Not even a minute later, Craig’s voice boomed through the house. “Since I’m already drenched, let’s get into the water! Everyone change into swimming trunks or whatever floats your boat!!”

Anthony’s eyes lit up with enthusiasm. “You heard the man! Let’s go!”  He grabbed John and Smitty, pulling them along with him. The jolly man parted ways in front of his room, which he locked after shutting the door.

John slanted, kissing Smitty’s forehead. “I’ll meet you outside babe.”

Bewildered, he stood there for a split second, ogling John’s butt as he closed the door behind him. He shook head amused as he entered his room to get changed.

Smitty rejoined the guys outside by the house. Craig was doing some sort of stretches before going swimming. John was trying out the water temperature, dipping his toes in. But Anthony was nowhere to be seen.

What’s taking him so long?

The Canadian approached Craig, who was closer. He thought he should do some warm – up too. He watched his friend bending in impossible positions. “You’re quite flexible, I’ll give you that.” Smitty commented, deciding to do some less drastic moves.

John’s outbreak of unadulterated mirth made both Smitty and Craig glance at the main entrance.

Anthony stood there in tight dark blue speedos. All eyes were on him, a profound silence lingered between them. He started sensually shaking his hips and singing:

Pedos in Speedos, down by the beach

Pedos in Speedos, watch where they reach

They gonna take your kids, they gonna fuck 'em t'night

They gonna take your kids, they gonna treat them right!

He repeated this little tune twice and Craig was turning into a tomato, collapsing on the ground from laughing too much.

Smitty and John were laughing, but not as much as Craig who was on a giggling spree.

Anthony stopped singing, switching to laughing. “Oh god, you little shit! Are you trying to make me faint from laughing?” Craig managed to utter between his uncontrollable giggling fit.

“I wasn’t gonna pass up this opportunity! That session of CAH is easily my favorite. Pedos in speedos ~”

Craig’s volume intensified and Anthony raised his hands. “Okay, that’s enough. I’m not sorry though. This shit was too good to pass up.” Anthony loomed over Craig and helped him stand up.

“Anthony, you fucker. I should have seen this coming.” He grumbled after calming down.

“Sorry not sorry. But I thought we were going for a swim.”

“We were before you decided to appear in tight speedos, my friend.”

Said man in speedos only shrugged, amused at Craig’s red face.

Meanwhile, the pair held hands and raced to the water, jumping in. Splashing, they resurfaced.

“The last one in the water has to cook tonight!” John yelled at the two men still at beach. Upon hearing that, Anthony dashed to the water, way ahead of Craig. “Wha- what? Hey!”

It was too late, Craig leapt in the lukewarm water as last. Upon resurfacing, he pouted. “Oh great. I don’t want to hear any complaints from you later. If you get food poisoning, it’s Anthony’s fault.” To make a statement, he splashed water over all three men.

“Oh now you fucked up.” Smitty mischievously splashed Craig and a few moment later, John joined him targeting Anthony. It was a 2 vs 2 in which there was no clear winner after Anthony turned on Craig and teamed up with Smitty and John.

Outnumbered, Craig capitulated, raising hands in defeat. “I give up, this is unfair battle.”

“Top 10 anime betrayals. I can see the clickbait.” Smitty remarked and he got a round of chuckles from everyone. They decided to swim a bit more, until suddenly Anthony clasped hands. “Alright gents. I don’t know about you, but I’m parched. We do have some soda in the fridge. Should I bring some?”

“Anything is fine, as long as it’s not that Seven Up swill.”

“Yep.”

“Agreed.”

With that, the man in speedos swam up to the shore, where he shook off excessive water droplets from his hair and beard like a dog, then headed inside the house.

Craig made a decision to give them some privacy and he swam back to the shore. “Did anyone ever tell you have dashing good looks?”

Smitty laughed at the compliment, planting small kisses along John’s neck and the man buried his fingers in the Canadian’s hair. It was hard to say who was more into making out. Their kisses got more heated, limbs entangled.

A loud cough broke their grip on each other. “Oookay, can you please keep it family friendly here?” Anthony’s rumbling voice reached their ears. They stopped – for now.

John and Smitty swam to shore, where Craig (who headed inside while they were making out) handed them towels to dry off. They accepted and watched their friend spread out a huge blanket on the sand. Anthony grinned, giving them cans of refreshing soda.

Admiring Craig’s handiwork (Anthony was probably admiring some other assets, too, judging by that smirk) they waited until it was neatly set down.

Craig picked the spot on the far left, the man in speedos laid down next to him and then John and Smitty got to lay close to each other, a bit further from friends, taking full advantage of that huge ass blanket.

Splayed down on his stomach, he faced John. His hair was still dripping wet, but in this heat, it was a matter of time before it would dry. John took a sip, noticing Smitty’s eyes on him, so he seductively licked his lips. The Canadian rolled over, so he laid on back. “John?”

“Yeah, babe?”

When their friends heard ‘babe’ both visibly cringed at that cheesiness; then laughed, getting back to some weird story Anthony was telling.

“So, I was wondering if you’d like to visit me sometime? Not right away, I know you’re moving soon. After you settled in, how about we meet up and have a weeklong sleepover or something like that. What do you think?”

John was contemplating Smitty’s offer. He took another sip of soda, directing his gaze back at his boyfriend. “Tell you what. Tonight you sleep in my room and I’ll come over as soon as I’m settled in my new place.”

“Holy shit! They are openly flirting in broad daylight. They got some moxie alright.”

“You know we can hear you, right?”

“Pfff, as if we don’t say much gayer shit on camera.” John’s pipe bomb silenced all protests, since it was true. Most of their banter in all videos was based on gay jokes, even flirting sometimes.

“I can’t argue with that.”

“Yep.”

Craig rose on his feet. “Since I’m in charge of cooking, I should go and prepare ingredients.” He moseyed to house and Anthony sighed twice. “I’m going to help him with cooking, he could use another pair of hands in kitchen. See you later.” Anthony scuttled inside, following after Craig.

“We’re alone again.”

“Yeah.”

...

“Let’s go take a dip. This heat is unbearable.” Smitty was already on his feet, offering a hand out to him. John grabbed on and he got pulled up.

Just like two teenagers in love, they ran simultaneously, side by side back into water.

They stayed there, just kissing and splashing each other with water until the sky darkened.

After a decent dinner and ten rounds of UNO, Anthony rage quit which everyone took as sign to go to their beds.

The dishes were done and they washed teeth, cramped in the bathroom. Craig tried to make everyone laugh, making derpy faces.

The bathroom episode was over soon, since all John wanted tonight was to snuggle close to a warm body. He grabbed Smitty’s waist as soon as he put away his toothbrush. He yelped, surprised upon the touch. “What the fuck? John?”

“Excuse us gents.” Without further ado, he dragged him along.

Anthony shook head, with a slight smile.

“I ship it.” Craig said openly, conveying his inner fanboy to him.

“I kinda do, too.” He admitted.

“I never thought I’d ship our friends together.”

“Me either.”

“Well, I’m off. Night Anthony.” Craig walked away from the awkward shipping banter.

“Night.” He muttered to himself as he too left to get some rest.

He knocked softly.

“Come in. I swear I’m not naked.” John could hear the muffled chuckle. The door creaked and Smitty peeked inside. John was underneath the sheets (with a shirt on), looking at him.

“Now don’t be shy, there’s plenty of space here.” John implied with an impish grin as Smitty theatrically rolled his eyes and shut the door.

He darted close to the bed, hesitating for a split second. That’s when John drew him in the bed with one fluid move. Smitty found himself sitting/laying atop John.

The Canadian felt blood rush to his face, when John sat up kissing him. He moaned, forgetting that Craig and Anthony are a few rooms down the hall.

But John stopped it there. “I’m sorry, this was supposed to be cuddling only. We’re taking it too fast or...?” He asked, concerned.

Smitty leaned in, placing a kiss on his nose. “Just a bit slower. When we’re all alone at my home, we can do anything you want.”

“Ooh, I’ll take your word for it.”

Yawning, John covered his mouth, the late hours finally got to them. Smitty slipped under the sheets, cuddling with his boyfriend.

John turned off the lamp light, feeling lighter than a feather. Smitty’s body heat was comforting...

They didn’t know when they drifted to sleep, in the safety of a loved one’s arms.

[vanteism]

run | jhs & pjm

pairing: jung hoseok x park jimin (platonic)

genre: angst, light fluff

word count: 2.6k

warnings: alcohol/drug use, mentions of death

↳ youth is just an illusion Hoseok keeps losing himself in.

A Dead Writers Co. Collaboration.

Upon opening his eyes, the flash of bright neon lights and loud cheers erupted from the surrounding crowd, Hoseok was met with the life that he dreamed of living for as long as he could remember. The alcohol and nightlife attracted him to this dangerous lifestyle, the endless nights becoming his only comfort as he escaped the reality that laid outside the broken door of the destroyed apartment.

This was the stomping ground for the outliers. The ones who found it difficult to conform to the standards of society. They all came here, the risky teenagers, the youth-obsessed adults, the people who sought out the same shelter as him.

They too, drowned themselves in alcohol and narcotics — bottle after bottle, line after line, hit after hit, — hoping to rid themselves of whatever troubled them. Bad days, messy breakups, a fuck-buddy relationship that faltered due to growing feelings, Hoseok has seen his fair share of it all. All under one roof. That's what it was all about. The feeling of freedom accompanied by a synthetic high, a rush that was too good to be real.

It was the comfort that drew some in, the fact that you could walk in with a broken heart and come across someone willing to help you talk it out or to fuck it away. This house was full of the broken, the hurt, the scarred. These parties resembled a broken record, the same people coming and going each time, the same event transpiring as a result of the loss of logic.

With a leather jacket on his back and boots tied in several knots to prevent any loose strings from popping up, Hoseok made his way through the crowd, eyes searching for a particular orange-haired male. Maneuvering past the half-dressed girls strewn across the floor, he finds that familiar head of hair.

"Jimin!"

"Hoseok!" the male greets, a smile on his face, jacket hanging off his shoulder and exposing the loose white tank underneath. "I almost thought that you weren't gonna make it tonight! You're later than usual." he continues.

"Well, let's just say that I had a harder time getting here today. But none of that really matters now, does it? Now that I'm here?" Hoseok replies, eyes darting around him in search of a drink.

Instinctively, he reached out for the familiar red plastic cup set on top of a tray that made its way by him. Taking a quick swig of the mysterious liquid, Hoseok releases a sigh of content as he returns to the conversation from a bit earlier.

"Of course you would go for the booze first, huh?" Jimin chuckled despite being unfazed by the other males actions.

"Free booze is always good booze to me," Hoseok replies before downing another gulp.

"So it seems. It tastes a little strange tonight, maybe one of the girls decided to throw in an extra bottle of vodka."

"Maybe you're just getting worse at holding your alcohol, Jimin. It tastes fine to me."

"Let's not start assuming things, eh?" Jimin replies, chuckling to hide the disbelief in reaction to his friend's statement.

"Mmmm, whatever you say, man. Now, where are the rest of the boys, I find it hard to believe that they would decide to ditch us again, on a night like this."

"Right this way, your highness," a hint of sarcasm laced Jimin's voice as he guides Hoseok towards the rest of their group of friends.

Five was the magic number, it being the number of people they were looking for, and next to the stairs, on a rugged, black couch was where they found them. Slumped over one another, it was hard for anyone to tell if they were even conscious.

Approaching the group, Hoseok chuckles at the sight of his friends’ clear discomfort. Walking up to them, he gives each of them a light punch to their shoulders, rousing them from their senseless drunken state, directing their attention away from the countless amount of cups that littered the floor around his feet.

“The party only just started why are you guys already dead?” Hoseok questions in a joking manner, well aware that the party had begun hours before he even knocked on the door.

“God please if I have to drink another cup of that… vod… b-beer… whatever it was, I think I might throw up,” one of them replies, rubbing their eyes before releasing a groan. “You two go ahead, Jimin has been sitting in the back seat all night waiting for you. I’ve only seen him down two cups.” And with that, they lean back and close their eyes, giving into the alluring temptation to sleep. But it wouldn’t last for long, it never did.

An arm is found slung over Hoseok’s shoulder as he was about to come up with a snarky remark, but as he turned over to find the owner of the arm, he is greeted by an eye-smile that belonged to none other than Park Jimin.

You could say that the two were best friends, playing together in the sandbox at the age of two before moving onto ball-pits and public pools at the age of twelve. It was in high school where their friendship truly blossomed, moving away from just an after-school hangout to hitching rides together to whatever party they could find. It’s hard to not become close to someone after drunk confessing to ridiculous actions in the middle of a stranger’s living room, but to Hoseok this friendship was more than just a way to have a safety buddy for those nights where one may end up blacked out on a stool, Jimin was more than that.

Through thick and thin, Jimin was always there. During their younger years, Jimin was Hoseok’s only companion, sitting with him during lunch as the other kids gathered at the tables where there were tablets or game consoles present. Those days created the foundation of a friendship that has withstood the test of time, a friendship that now thrived even with the addition of more people into their friend group. It became harder and harder as time passed for Hoseok to imagine not having Jimin by his side, and same went for Jimin.

The party was hazy, the atmosphere was lively yet dense as a result of the sheer amount of people present in the already-cramped apartment, the air was almost too thick to breathe in. Hoseok could feel a pain growing in his head, but with limited seating available, he told himself that if he just ignored it and continued on, trying to become the life of the party, that the ache would dissipate, so that’s what he did.

One moment he was in the middle of the crowd, numerous girls clad in sequined skin-tight attire grinding on him, a smile on his face, the music blaring from the large speakers in the corners of the room drowned out by the constant chatter and cheering of the crowd. Camera flashes and strobe lights making it difficult to see, but no one cared when they just closed their eyes and let the music guide them.

A hand suddenly grips Hoseok’s upper arm, shaking him out of the trace that engulfed him as he lost himself in the crowd.

“Dude, you’ve gotta stop scaring me like that!” Hoseok exclaims, clutching his chest as his heart rate begins to return back to normal. Jimin laughed at his friend's reaction, the image of Hoseok’s change in expression repeating in his mind.

“Well, the boys want a group picture before they have to leave. I think they have a bio exam or something tomorrow and they need to go home and recover.”

“God, why did they even come if they knew that? It’s like they want to fail.” A look of confusion on Hoseok’s face made Jimin smile.

“Well, come on, they’re in the bathroom. Let’s just get it over with so you can go back to being a chick-magnet on the dance floor.”

“Hey! I was not!” Hoseok retorts before following his friend toward a familiar door with a sign that read ‘PLEASE do not destroy.’

Upon opening the door, the two saw their friends draped over the bathtub in the corner of the room. Why the hell did they want to be photographed in a half-full, grimy tub, but Hoseok made his way over anyway, a displeased look on his face.

"Okay, out of all the places you guys could have gone, you chose... here?" He questioned.

One of his friends looked in his direction before attempting to formulate a clever response. After a moment of silence, another member of the group jumps in, clearly impatient.

"This is the only place that wasn't filled with people and someone thought it would be a cool photo spot." flicking the head of the person next to him.

Another pang fills Hoseok's head, causing him to shut his eyes, limbs heavy and lacking control, and stumble, his balance lost and head spinning.

"Hey, you okay dude?" Jimin asks, eyes wide with concern as he witnessed his friend nearly fall over. Hoseok replies with a nod and a soft smile, trying to reassure Jimin.

Though it was apparent that Jimin was still concerned, the two still found spots around the bathtub where they could sit. Facing a random stranger, who Hoseok assumed was there to take the photo, he took his phone out of his pocket and handed it to them, quickly opening the camera feature.

"Flash or no flash?" they asked as they positioned his phone for the picture.

"Do both. And do a countdown before you snap the photo, I have to make sure that I look good," Jimin replied and smirked before a wave of unamused groans filled the small room.

"Alright then. Okay, so... three... two.. one!"

A camera shutter filled the silence, bright smiles on everyone's face.

"Aww, I think I blinked!" someone exclaims.

"It's fine, we still have one more photo. Can I see my phone real quick?”

They hand Hoseok back his phone and he immediately opens up the photo, looking at his face.

“Man! I look good!”

“You look like a used gym sock dude.”

“Take that back!”

A notification filled the upper part of the screen, displaying a text message from ‘♥’ that read ‘meet me @ the stairs later?’

“Duuuuude, you’re still talking to… what’s her name… Soyeon?”

“I heard she hooked up with THREE dudes the other night.”

Hoseok’s nostrils flare in anger.

“I didn’t think that my love life was up for discussion today so uh… how about you shutthefuckup?”

“Stop arguing! He has needs too you know!”

“I SAID SHUT UP!”

Hoseok hands his phone back to the person taking photos and repositions himself in his spot next to the tub.

"Alright! So flash on, right?" the stranger asked, the tone of the voice indicating their displeasure, ready to get back into the party that raged on outside the bathroom door.

Suddenly, another large ache hits Hoseok. He shakes his head to try and alleviate the pain, to no avail, but no one seems to notice; they were all distracted by the camera.

"Three.. two.. on—"

Hoseok blacks out.

Upon opening his eyes, Hoseok discovers that he is no longer at that party. The room that was filled with color was replaced by one that was completely white. The walls were made of a cement that was painted white, the floor consisted of an alternating pattern of white tiles, the bed frame and sheets that surrounded Hoseok was white. No longer was he wearing his black leather jacket, his body was draped in a shapeless hospital gown that resembled a large blanket.

Blank would best describe the room, not a single piece of decor was hung on the walls and the only thing that broke the pristine state of the room was a set of tally marks faintly scratched on the wall by the door. That metal door. Something was painstakingly familiar about it. The silver body, the large bolts that lined the perimeter of the structure set apart at equal lengths. But Hoseok couldn't put his tongue on it, everything seemed so familiar, but also so foreign.

Eyes darting around the room, his heart begins to race as he takes on the seemingly unfamiliar environment, longing to return to the party he was at just a few moments ago, longing to feel the freedom he experience instead of the constriction he felt in the relatively small room. What even happened? How did he get here?

He was just at a party, right? He was hanging out with Jimin and the others, he was dancing in the middle of a crowd, he was there. Not here. Not in this room. No matter how hard Hoseok tried, he couldn't figure out where he was. The bottles, the girls, the other misfits, they all were gone. Was he locked up? Is this where he was taken after he collapsed at the party?

Sitting up, his head pangs, a large ache replaced the previous confusion. It felt just like the ache he felt before he lost consciousness. That memory was so vivid, even thinking about it made it feel so real to Hoseok. It just happened, right?

A knock on the structure that kept him in the space made his heart drop. Eyes wide, his gaze was directed at the door be where a loud screech was emitted. Hoseok immediately covers his ears in response, eyes shutting tightly and knees bent against his chest.

When the sound subsided and Hoseok reopened his eyes, he was greeted by a man in a large white coat and a clipboard. His name tag read ‘Dr. Han.’ but Hoseok could care less.

"Why am I here?" Hoseok questions sternly, desperate for answers, any kind of explanation.

Dr. Han lets out a sigh. "It seems like you forgot again. I have to change your dosage but your insomnia is so strong. I guess your current dose induces memory loss."

"Wait, what? What dosage? Memory loss??" fumed Hoseok, more confused than before.

"Can you tell me the last thing you remember?"

"I-I was at... a party. With Jimin."

“A party? Hoseok, you’ve been asleep all day.”

“What? I was at a party, with my friends, I don’t even know what this place is!”

"Oh no." Dr. Han grows quiet.

"What do you mean oh no?! Are you not going to explain anything??" Hoseok was shouting, angered by the lack of explanation he was receiving.

"Hoseok,"

"Yes, that's my name, can you answer my questions already?"

"You're here because you had an overdose of Restoril a few months ago and you’ve attempted to do so every single time we released you... We now have to monitor you and your insomnia to try and prevent you from doing that again. You've proven to be a danger to yourself. That's why."

The doctor's emotionless response silenced Hoseok as he tried to understand what he said completely. Overdose? He couldn't recall overdosing. Hell, he couldn’t even having insomnia.

“So I’ve been in here for months is what you’re telling me?”

Dr. Han nods and begins to write something down on his clipboard, probably recording Hoseok's response for whatever they needed it for. Suddenly, the writing halts as Dr. Han's eyes widen in realization.

"You mentioned a name earlier when you recalled the last thing you remembered. Can you repeat what you told me?"

Hoseok rolls his eyes.

"I said that I remember being at a party, with my friend Jimin."

"And how long ago do you think that was?"

"Right before you came in, I was taking a group photo and I blacked out and I woke up here."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, god damn it! It's the only thing I can remember and I know I was there."

"Hoseok."

"What? Are you going to tell me I'm wrong? Are you gonna tell me that I'm making it up?"

Dr. Han releases one last sigh.

"Jimin died at the party 2 years ago. You were admitted here right after."

[conniejoworld]

PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION | GEORGIA Trump on call: Find me votes Recording reveals effort to pressure state’s top election official to change outcome By AMY GARDNER The Washington Post WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump urged fellow Republican Brad Raffensperger, the Georgia secretary of state, to “find” enough votes to overturn his defeat in an extraordinary one-hour phone call Saturday that legal scholars described as a flagrant abuse of power and a potential criminal act. The Washington Post obtained a recording of the conversation in which Trump alternately berated Raffensperger, tried to flatter him, begged him to act and threatened him with vague criminal consequences if the secretary of state refused to pursue Trump’s false claims, at one point warning that Raffensperger was taking “a big risk.” Throughout the call, Raffensperger and his office’s general counsel rejected Trump’s assertions, explaining that the president is relying on debunked conspiracy theories and that President-elect Joe Biden’s 11,779-vote victory in Georgia was fair and accurate. Trump dismissed their arguments. “The people of Georgia are angry, the people in the country are angry,” he said. “And there’s nothing wrong with saying, you know, that you’ve recalculated.” Raffensperger responded: “Well, Mr. President, the challenge that you have is, the data you have is wrong.” At another point, Trump said: “So look. All I want to do is this. I just want to find 11,780 votes, which is one more than we have. Because we won the state.” He later added: “So what are we going to do here, folks? I only need 11,000 votes. Fellas, I need 11,000 votes. Give me a break.” ‘There’s no way I lost’ The rambling — and at times incoherent — conversation offered a glimpse of how consumed the president remains about his loss and how he still believes he can reverse the results in enough battleground states to remain in office. “There’s no way I lost Georgia,” Trump said, a phrase he repeated again and again on the call. “There’s no way. We won by hundreds of thousands of votes.” Several of his allies were on the line as he spoke, including White House chief of staff Mark Meadows and conservative lawyer Cleta Mitchell, a prominent GOP attorney whose involvement with Trump’s efforts had not been previously known. In a statement, Mitchell said Raffensperger’s office “has made many statements over the past two months that are simply not correct and everyone involved with the efforts on behalf of the President’s election challenge has said the same thing: Show us your records on which you rely to make these statements that our numbers are wrong.” The White House, the Trump campaign and Meadows did not respond to a request for comment. Raffensperger’s office declined to comment. Trump tweets about call On Sunday, Trump tweeted that he had spoken to Raffensperger, saying the secretary of state was “unwilling, or unable, to answer questions such as the ‘ballots under table’ scam, ballot destruction, out of state ‘voters,’ dead voters, and more. He has no clue!” Raffensperger responded with his own tweet: “Respectfully, President Trump: What you’re saying is not true.” The details of the call drew demands from congressional Democrats for criminal investigations. Biden’s top campaign lawyer, Bob Bauer, said the recording “captures the whole, disgraceful story about Donald Trump’s assault on American democracy.” Republicans, however, were largely silent. Sen. Ted Cruz, R-Texas, when asked about the call while campaigning in Georgia on Sunday for the two GOP senators who face a run-off Tuesday, dodged the question. Trump’s pressure campaign on Raffensperger is the latest example of his attempt to subvert the outcome of the election through outreach to state Republican officials. He previously invited Michigan Republican state leaders to the White House, pressured Republican Georgia Gov. Brian Kemp in a call to try to replace that state’s electors, and asked the speaker of the Pennsylvania House of Representatives to help reverse his loss in that state. Congressional challenges His call to Raffensperger came as scores of Republicans have pledged to challenge the Electoral College’s vote for Biden when Congress convenes on Wednesday. Republicans do not have the votes to successfully thwart Biden’s victory, but Trump has urged supporters to travel to Washington to protest the outcome, and state and federal officials are already bracing for clashes outside the Capitol. During their conversation, Trump issued a vague threat to both Raffensperger and Ryan Germany, the secretary of state’s general counsel, suggesting that if they don’t find that thousands of ballots in Fulton County have been illegally destroyed to block investigators — an allegation for which there is no evidence — they would be subject to criminal liability. “That’s a criminal offense,” he said. “And you can’t let that happen. That’s a big risk to you and to Ryan, your lawyer.” Trump also told Raffensperger that failure to act by Tuesday would jeopardize the political fortunes of David Perdue and Kelly Loeffler, Georgia’s two Republican senators whose fate in that day’s runoff elections will determine control of the U.S. Senate. Trump said he plans to talk about the alleged fraud on Monday, when he is scheduled to lead an election eve rally in Dalton, Ga. — a message that could further muddle the efforts of Republicans to draw out their voters. “You have a big election coming up and because of what you’ve done to the president — you know, the people of Georgia know that this was a scam,” Trump said. “Because of what you’ve done to the president, a lot of people aren’t going out to vote, and a lot of Republicans are going to vote negative, because they hate what you did to the president. OK? They hate it. And they’re going to vote. And you would be respected, really respected, if this can be straightened out before the election.” ‘Tripping the emergency meter’ Trump’s conversation with Raffensperger put him in legally questionable territory, legal experts said. By exhorting the secretary of state to “find” votes and to deploy investigators who “want to find answers,” Trump appears to be encouraging him to doctor the election outcome in Georgia, which could violate both state and federal laws. Trump’s apparent threat of criminal consequences if Raffensperger does not act could be seen as an attempt at extortion and a suggestion that he might deploy the Justice Department to launch an investigation, they said. “The president is either knowingly attempting to coerce state officials into corrupting the integrity of the election or is so deluded that he believes what he’s saying,” said Richard Pildes, a constitutional law professor at New York University, who noted that Trump’s actions may have violated several federal statutes. But Pildes said Trump’s clearer transgression is a moral one, and he emphasized that focusing on whether he committed a crime could deflect attention from the “simple, stark, horrific fact that we have a president trying to use the powers of his office to pressure state officials into committing election fraud to keep him in office.” Edward Foley, a law professor at Ohio State University, said that the legal questions are murky and that it could be difficult to prove Trump knew he was encouraging illegal behavior. But Foley also emphasized that the call was “inappropriate and contemptible” and should prompt outrage. “He was already tripping the emergency meter,” Foley said. “So we were at 12 on a scale of 1 to 10, and now we’re at 15.” ‘What’s wrong with you?’ In the end, Trump asked Germany to sit down with one of his attorneys to go over the allegations. Germany agreed. Yet Trump also recognized that he was failing to persuade Raffensperger or Germany of anything, saying toward the end, “I know this phone call is going nowhere.” “Why don’t you want to find this, Ryan?” he asked of Germany. “What’s wrong with you? I heard your lawyer is very difficult, actually, but I’m sure you’re a good lawyer. You have a nice last name.” But he continued to make his case in repetitive fashion, until finally, after roughly an hour, Raffensperger put an end to the conversation: “Thank you, President Trump, for your time.” There is no role for the military in changing the election results, all of the living former defense secretaries said in an extraordinary rebuke to President Donald Trump and other Republicans who are backing unfounded claims of widespread fraud at the ballot box. THEIR WARNING: “Our elections have occurred. Recounts and audits have been conducted,” the former defense secretaries wrote Sunday evening in an opinion piece that they co-authored and published in The Washington Post . “Appropriate challenges have been addressed by the courts. Governors have certified the results. And the electoral college has voted. The time for questioning the results has passed; the time for the formal counting of the electoral college votes, as prescribed in the Constitution and statute, has arrived.” THE AUTHORS: The former Pentagon chiefs included in the piece were Trump’s two former defense secretaries, Jim Mattis and Mark Esper, as well as each living Senate-confirmed Pentagon chief dating back to former Vice President Dick Cheney, who was defense secretary under President George H.W. Bush. The Washington Post

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