#you can want him to survive for whatever reasons you want idc. but I saw someone say it would be boring and I got mad SORRY NOT PERSONAL

[poppyseed799]

I feel like everyone’s forgetting that Jimmy dying first again is NOT the most likely outcome. It’s INSANE that he has died first four times. I want it to happen again BECAUSE THAT WOULD BE EVEN MORE INSANE. It’s most likely that he won’t be the first to die, and while that would be hype for him, I would mourn the loss of the highly improbable streak we had going.

[fluffytheocelot]

Okay, I saw your screencap redraw, and as someone else who's *obsessed* with Carmen's parents, I had to take you up on that offer. So, consider this ask license to infodump your thoughts on them! :)

AGH ok so-

Carmen's parents have a LOT of potential narrative-wise, and I really hope one day we'll see more of them in canon. (Maybe comics like the showrunner talked about before?)

Like how in the world did they meet??? Cause idk i feel like Carlotta disappeared way too easily to have just been a civilian. I think she was a thief too, not VILE, she only steals when she needs to, for one reason or another.

this is getting long oops- under the cut!

I think they happened to be going after the same thing, at the same time, and hoo boy do they not get along lol. Turns out Carlotta (telling Dexter her name is Vera Cruz. He does not believe her) had agreed to steal the whatever-it-is in exchange for an under-the-radar trip somewhere else.

They make a deal: Dexter gets her there, and he gets to keep the prize. Yay, roadtrip!

Cue rivals-to-friends-to-lovers speedrun lmao

Some time passes after that (during which they continue to see each other) and many months later they discover oops they made a Carmen

Dexter begins making his much longer trips away from VILE (wanting to support his partner with their unborn kid as much as he can) and starts the process of leaving. When Carmen is born, his trips away get longer and VILE finally catches wind of what's happening, and you know the rest.

AHH ok headcanons about each:

Dexter

definitely shares a lot of personality traits with Carmen. Even just from what we saw during Shadowsan's flashback, they are so so similar :( The two combined chaos energies probably would've driven Carlotta up a wall lmao

woulda been a fantastic girl dad. this man would have sat thru tea parties and played barbies with little Carmen and LOVED IT

dad jokes. that is all.

probably also a very high energy/troublemaking kid, like Carmen

Seriously I picture him and Carmen being super close if he'd survived.

idk i think it'd be funny that this master thief that is 1/5th of the leadership of a massive and ancient crime organization is an absolute dorky dad lmao

bi

was gonna ask Carlotta to marry him after he escaped. but. well.. yk.

Was gonna pick Shadowsan to take his place on the faculty anyway

knows guitar, and probably would've taught carmen how to as well.

is it a universal dad thing to enjoy Jimmy Buffet music or is that just my dad??? Idk either way he vibes. Carlotta has a video of him softly strumming a guitar with baby Carmen in his lap and singing "Little Miss Magic" to her ;-;

also enjoys AC/DC, Black Sabbath, Guns n Roses, all that kinda stuff. Probably projecting my own dad a bit but oh well

As much as he'd hate he couldn't be there for Carmen when she was growing up, I think he'd be glad she at least had Shadowsan looking out for her :)

He would be so proud of everything Carmen has done and accomplished ;-;

Carlotta

its probably been said before, but Carlotta definitely started up the orphanage in Buenos Aires hoping Carmen would end up in it at some point.

Carmen inherited thief skills from both parents idc. Carlotta definitely gave Dexter a run for his money lol

looks a lot like carmen, but with green eyes instead of gray, and more brown hair than Carmen's red/auburn.

also the parent carmen got her freckles from (BC Carmen had em when she was little, and she spent a lot of time out in the sun!! I will die on the Carmen having faint freckles hill dangit!)

also bi. idk these two give bi4bi vibes.

more likely to get into a fistfight out of the two of them ("Carlotta, no!" "Carlotta YES" *cut to Dexter desperately trying to hold her back* "CARLOTTA PLEASE WE'RE TRYING NOT TO GET CAUGHT")

Upon reuniting with and getting to know Carmen, she's very much reminded of Dexter. She'd be all too happy to tell her stories of Dexter.

definitely also has a bit of a mischief streak too.

absolutely did NOT put up with Dexter's nonsense at first lol

was initially terrified of what Dexter would think when she told him they were gonna be parents, but was quickly reassured when the next time Dexter came back from VILE he had armloads of baby stuff from around the world.

Probably has a big extended family but after Dexter's death and Carmen disappears, she gets distant with them. After reuniting with Carmen though, accidentally runs into a family member with her and they're like "wait is that her?? She's alive??" and just like that Carmen has managed to acquire ANOTHER family lol.

Absolutely thrilled to learn Carmen wasn't alone all those years and immediately just adopts Zack, Ivy, and Player lol

Probably a little hesitant about Shadowsan at first, given that he was supposed to assassinate Dexter and did actually take her daughter to VILE, but eventually they're chill and he tells her stories of Black Sheep's antics. Meanwhile Carmen is in the background begging him not to lol.

I think once she got over her distrust of Shadowsan and got to know him, and sees how close he and Carmen are, she'd be glad that he was there for Carmen when Dexter couldn't be.

ARGHSH I have plans for them in many AUs lol. I'll get around to actually enacting em someday XD

[galewingpirates]

Baratie Arc

I LOVED THIS ARC

Baratie Arc? More like Sanji Arc- Ok ok ok let’s get started.

First of all: New crewmate!!! Sanji is so cool. His backstory was probably the darkest of the crew that’s been revealed so far bc like. Starvation is no joke. ALSO ZEFF CUT HIS OWN LEG OFF TO SAVE SANJI?.?? that’s his dad. Idc who Sanji’s real dad is, ZEFF is his dad.

Zoro’s friends were so funny in this arc too like how are they still alive 😭 I’m glad they’re ok though. Full body iron fist or whatever his name is? He was INTERESTING WHY DID THEY JUST USE HIM TO INTRODUCE SANJI AND GIVE LUFFY A REASON TO STAY AT THE BARATIE FOR LONGER THAN HE HAD TO. BRING HIM BAAAAACK I WANT SANJI TO KICK HIM IN THE FACE AGAIN!!!

Also Mihawk. All hail Mihawk. He’s so great omg I want more Mihawk content and I want it now. He’s my fave he looks so cool I want a poster of him

ZEFF is chill, I like him. He’s funny. The fact that he hits people with his hat while he’s wearing it is hilarious and I love it.

Also idk why but I rlly like Sanji’s shirt. Like- the stripey blue shirt. It’s my favorite thing ever. Also Sanji gets so angry so quickly and it’s absolutely hilarious like he was so calm until Fullbody spilled the soup. He curses so much and I appreciate that.

IM SO CONCERNED ABT THIS CREW BTW CAUSE LUFFY JUST PUNCHED DON KRIEG THROUGH THE SPIKES AND ZORO GOT DESTROYED BY MIHAWK- WHERE IS THEIR SURVIVAL INSTINCT 😭

Also Sanji saving Luffy from drowning 👍 they’re besties now I don’t make the rules

I think Usopp has all their survival instinct at this point

Alright, I might rewatch this arc later, I really liked it! It was cool 😎

Baratie Arc notes (I made these as I watched the arc)

Be warned, this is essentially spam that makes no sense if u don’t remember every little thing that happens in the arc

Why do they have so many limes??? I mean It’s good they had them bc scurvy is no joke but WHY

ALSO THE “hooray hooray!! Hooray hooray!! Hooray hooray!!” IS SO FUNNY

“A certain hawk-eyed man you’re looking for is there” 👀👀👀👀👀 HIM?????

“OUR DESTINATION IS..” IM FINALLY GONNA KNOW HOW TO PRONOUNCE BARATIE OMG-

🧍‍♂️ “Barateeay”????? What?????

THE MARINES R HERE TOO???? 😭

Oh the iron fist guy is kinda cool tbh.

“They’re an eyesore. Sink ‘em.” DAMN. NVM IG???

I’ve heard OF Arlong before but now I’m actually seeing the wanted poster and Nami is crying??? 😟

Did. Did Luffy just hit the Baratie with a cannonball.

FIRST SANJI SIGHTING IM GOING FERAL AAAAAAAA THERE HE IS!!!!!! ITS HIM!!! I WANT A PLUSHIE OF HIM I CAN THROW AT THE WALL. If I don’t like Sanji’s VA I swear I’m throwing myself into the sun.

He’s great. Sanji is great. So cool. (Also Zeff sounds like a muppet and it’s so incredibly funny that he bonked Luffy with his hat)

“Sorry sir, don’t know really. Looks like he’s floating. Then again, it kinda looks like he’s drowning, but it’s hard to say for sure.” Sanji is so funny I love him

Why did Sanji put his hand in the spilled soup though??? 😭

“The customer is always right”? No. “The customer will get kicked in the face”.

WHY DID LUFFY AND ZEFF FALL THROUGH THE CEILING??

WHY DID FULLBODY SHOOT ONE OF HIS OWN MEN IN THE RESTAURANT??? I AGREE WITH LUFFY THIS RESTAURANT IS CRAZY

Ok wait no it wasn’t Fullbody I got confused.

Sanji is so slay though. He’s so silly.

“I REFUSE TO ACCEPT YOUR REFUSAL” I’m- ????? 😭 this is so good

Sanji stop throwing dishware into the sea 🙏

LUFFY GODDAMNIT WHATS WITH THE DISRESPECT FOR DISHWEAR IN THIS EPISODE

“Finish pouring it yourself” IM SOBBIMG.

Nami scamming Sanji is the funniest thing ever but also like free food is so good so I get it

Don Krieg this Don Krieg that IDC

“I saw things that I couldn’t bring myself to believe” IS THAT MIHAWK??????

IT IS!!! IT IS MIHAWK!!!!!!!!

Also Usopp’s scream is great lmao BUT THE LOOK OF TERROR ON EVERYONE’S FACES!!! Mihawk is great :]]]

Also I thought Sanji had a painting of cheese earlier but it’s a map 😭

“Perhaps you interrupted him during a nap” I love that that’s canon in the live action apparently omg Mihawk is great

Why does one of the Don Krieg Pirates just have a shirt that says ‘war’ on the back??? 😭

What’s with the freaky green candle??? OH ITS MIHAWK’S FREAKY GREEN CANDLE. MIHAWK MY FAVE. HES SO COOL. Also I didn’t mention this earlier but why do the cooks have giant cutlery weapons???

Anyways Mihawk :]

Oh WOW he cut that boat clean in half. They’re gonna need some flex tape.

WAIT NAMI STOLE THE GOING MERRY??? HUH???

also Mihawk’s little ship is so funny why is he using candles in the ocean 😭 how did his boat not sink??? So many questions HIS BOAT IS SHAPED LIKE A COFFIN HES SO GOTH

Where is this man’s shirt. 🧍‍♂️

“Just killing time.” MIHAWK. I’m a Mihawk stan now istg.

Mihawk is so cool, also how in the world did he win that fight with a tiny dagger??? Also the ‘I’m afraid I don’t carry any smaller blades’ WOW

JESUS CHRIST THEY WERENT KIDDING WHEN THEY SAID SANJI ALMOST STARVED. Also that pearl guy is weird.

I love how much Sanji curses omg. ALSO GIN IS SUPER STRONG???

“He’s our cool-headed cold-hearted pirate fleet chief commander Gin.” Why. Why was that sentence so long.

I like Sanji’s stripey blue shirt. It’s cool. It’s a wonderful blue shirt.

“Say, have you ever heard of the All Blue?” IM SCREAMING HE S SO EXCITED TO TALK ABOUT IT.

YOSAKU,,,,???? HOWD HE GET EATEN BY A SHARK AND HOW IS HE ALIVE (Also the chefs loving Sanji’s soup 😭)

Why does Sanji have a suitcase of kitchen knives.

ALSO SANJIS BACKSTORY NEEDS TO STOP MAKING ME CRY

[killthebxy]

a heap of headcanons: the last hours before the Battle for Winterfell

inspired + complemented by @needlcd & @zcldrizes own posts

first of all, all of these come following my personal take on the events of s08, as i am show!canon divergent. this can be found: HERE.

Jon has had A LOT to do, ever since Tormund, Edd, and Beric arrived with the news. as Warden of the North, it falls on him to supervise the setting up of defenses. just as much, he’s been trying to learn as much as he can about the Unsullied and the Dothraki, as to understand how to better place them in the battlefield. he’s also been keeping close talks with Gendry and the other smiths, and helping with distributing dragonglass weapons to everyone himself, in between everything else already stated. for all this, he doesn’t have much free time up until after the strategy meeting we see in episode 2.

even though he concludes such meeting with “let’s get some rest”, he doesn’t follow his own advice really. he’s very antsy and understandably so, and cannot bring himself to stay still --- so he goes on a final round to make sure everything and everyone are as prepared as they can possibly be. this is when he goes to check in on Sansa and Bran, to also ensure they are well and to try and reassure them a bit --- again, as much as possible in the situation.

after this comes the scene we see in episode 2 between Jon, Sam, and Edd. they reminisce about their times at the Night’s Watch, particularly the night that Mance Rayder stormed the Wall --- note that @tymptir and i headcanon Grenn as very much alive and at Winterfell. Jeor Mormont and Mance himself (ft. @starfrckled) just as much, so Jon spends some time with all of them as well. he also finds Tormund (ft. @talltalkr) in between his moments with Brienne & co, and they talk of how they did not survive Hardhome to let the Night King come kill them in their own home now. particularly, while he says nothing about this, Jon prays to the old gods that Tormund will not be made to see/fight his daughters who have been turned into wights at Hardome.

next, comes the scene at the crypts with Dany. based on my divergent background and on my own plot with @zcldrizes, the source of tension between them at this point is the fact that Dany did not tell Jon that she burned the Tarlys for treason. now... Jon does understand this. he’s a commander himself, he’s executed men (and boys) for similar reasons. so what’s driving him off, at the moment, is 1) how conflicted he is, because he does not wish to hurt her but he also does not wish to hurt Sam, and 2) based on my plot with @tymptir, one day before, Sam revealed to Jon in these same crypts that his mother was Ashara Dayne (ft. also my plot with @ashccra). ever since, Jon has been struggling to come to peace with the fact that Ned never told him of it --- and here comes into play the heightened paranoia he was left with after the mutiny at Castle Black and his revival (if you’d like details on how this affects my portrayal of Jon, you’re welcome to read: this meta). Jon has ever felt the need to prove himself, as per his bastard-born nature and the internalization of this stigma (again, a meta: here), but after his own men betray him this grows A LOT worse --- as in, that was an absolute failure on my end and i deserved what happened. at this point, he’s questioning himself if maybe this is why his father never told him anything --- if Ned was ashamed to have him as a son, if Ned saw him under the same light Cat (for example) did and only tried to hide it out of kindness. then, suddenly... he gets told that Dany also hid such a huge fact from him, and this goes even further downhill. it is important to note: right now, after Sam’s revelation (+ the current very stressful circumstances + his own physical and mental exhaustion, as he’s been barely eating and sleeping during the past couple of days), Jon is NOT in his right mind. he’s exhausted, he’s paranoid, he’s dealing with HUGE guilt for being unable to guarantee his loved ones and his people will live to see another day. this is why he’s been avoiding Dany, and this why, even if they do talk right now at the crypts, he’s still very much distant --- it’s a self-defense coping mechanism. Artie and i, therefore, headcanon that, while they do not really fight, they are unable to properly discuss everything, either --- so they agree that they cannot afford to go into this battle whilst angry at each other, and they agree to take some time apart and to finish this talk later --- both of them fully aware that, likely, there won’t be a “later” for either or both of them.

after this, Jon heads for the godswood for a good while. he’s spoken to the statues of Ned and Robb already ( @kingwholost you can be sure there IS a statue of Robb), and now he goes to speak to the old gods. for the most part, though, he does not pray --- not yet. he simply seeks their calm and their peace and their wisdom, and sits under the heart tree honing Longclaw’s blade as Ned so often used to do with Ice, himself. and it does bring him a little bit of comfort.

finally, he heads back to his room and begins donning his Stark armor. and listen. idc what episode 3 will bring, JON -IS- WEARING ARMOR BECAUSE HE IS NOT STUPID. also the stewards @thedolorous & @satincrow are welcome to come help for a bit if they want. eventually, @needlcd comes to join him and he wouldn’t have it any other way --- he’s spending his potential last hours alive with his little sister, his heart, light of his eyes, the person he loves most in this world and quite more than his own life. he doesn’t need more than a look to see how distressed she is and, if nothing else, he’s happy that he can finally be here to keep her safe after all the horrors she’s had to face on her own. there isn’t much talking, as there is not need to be, and he simply lets her snuggle into him as much and for as long as she needs --- he lets her cry if she needs and makes no comment, simply running his fingers through her hair. Jon himself does not cry, not yet, because this moment is for her.

eventually... Arya falls asleep in his arms, Ghost by now also joined into the little cuddle pile, and Jon spends the last hours before the sound of the warhorns with himself. he’s exhausted, but he cannot sleep --- and he does not want to sleep, not when this may be his last chance to have his little sister safe in his arms. he thinks about everything and everyone, at this point. and this is when he prays: gods of my father, protect my people. protect Arya and let her live to see brighter days, she’s been through so much. protect Bran and Sansa. protect Dany and allow her to give justice to her child. protect my good and loyal friends who’ve followed me to the end of the world. i beg you, give me strength and skill to keep them all safe or at least alive. guide my steps and let me save them. and this is when he cries... or as close to crying as Jon Snow ever comes; a few silent, tiny tears rolling down his cheeks, and that he promptly wipes away with the back of his hand. it’s not his first time waiting for the enemy to come, though even wildling hosts pale in comparison to literal Death. at this point, Jon has a very cocky relationship with the possibility of his own dying --- because he has gone through it (twice, as i headcanon that he died in that frozen lake). not as in “i am so tough and death can’t kill me”, no, but in a completely detached sort of toxic mindset --- i have died and they brought me back because they still had a use for me (Melisandre told him this, through different words) --- if i die again and they still need me, they’ll bring me back yet again. but you, Lord Snow, you’ll be fighting their battles forever. he does not feel bitter about it anymore, for the simple reason he has repressed that experience to the point of being numb to it. therefore, right now, Jon is not afraid to die --- his only huge, overwhelming fear is that he will be unable to keep his loved ones alive/ unharmed, especially this skinny little girl currently sleeping in his arms. so, when the time comes, this is why he does not feel any of his fatigue anymore --- a sort of parallel with the wights; our enemy does not tire. Jon himself has become a wight animated by fire, rather than ice. and he will not tire --- not while he has his family and his home and his people to defend, or die in the attempt.

one final note: if there is one thing i do not tolerate in the show, it is the lack of consequences when it comes to Jon’s actions (frozen lake, cough, just to cite the more blatant case). i do NOT write Jon Snow as an overpowered superhero who can recklessly do whatever he wants and does not pay the price for it. i don’t know how the battle will unfold --- for example, if he will be wounded during it --- but i know that, should this be the case and the show does not acknowledge it, i will. in post-battle scenarios, despite what happens, he will suffer physical consequences for his actions --- and, if nothing else, he’s going to crash VERY HARD and go comatose for at least some 24h because his body will have reached the limit of exhaustion.

[surveystodestressme]

179.

Have you ever had feelings for 2 people at the same time?


yeah, or at least i felt like i did at the time

Do you believe that leaving a significant other for someone else is ever a good idea?

i mean if there’s a good reason for it

Is it possible to ‘fix’ a ‘broken’ relationship?


absolutely, as long as both people in the relationship try to fix whatever is broken

Would you ever throw out/give away something an ex gave you?


if i didn’t want/need it anymore then yeah

Why do you think people believe in love at first sight?


that’s just what they believe, i don’t know

If you found someone seemingly perfect for you, but it turned out they had a child… would you still give the relationship a chance?


probably not honestly.  i dont want anything to do with kids

Is it possible to ‘fall out of love’?


yes.

Why do you think people choose to get married?


because they want to

Why do you think people are against same-sex marriage?


it’s against their religion or whatever

How long have you had the shirt you’re wearing?


not very long, a couple months maybe, i think my dad got it for me

Are you a slut?


no.

What happened last time you got drunk?


it was at my boyfriends christmas at his grandparents house and i drank a lot and got really tired and fell asleep on the floor in the living room

Have you ever thrown up from drinking?


yup

Last thing you said out loud?


i was telling my boyfriend about something i saw on Cops

Do you find piercings attractive?


yeah

What’s your favourite number?


8

How many cigarettes have you smoked today?


none

What languages can you count to ten or higher in?


two

Have you gone through a lot emotionally, or has life been easy thus far?


i’ve gone through a lot but i’ve gotten through everything and survived so i suppose that’s good

Ever got suspended from school?


nope.

What would you do with a $10 bill you found on the ground?


keep it probs

Do you prefer the tanning bed or the sun?


the sun

What were you doing at 3AM last night?
  

sleeping

Are you ticklish?


yes.

Want to be taller or shorter?


taller

Biggest annoyance in your life right now?


school lol

Who is the first person you see in the mornings?  

my boyfriend

Do you like being called babe?


yeah

Is the last person you kissed more than 2 years older than you?


no.

Do you think anyone has feelings for you? 


i know it

Do you talk about your feelings or hide them?


in between.

Do you know anyone that smokes weed?


yes.

Did anyone see you kiss that last person you kissed?


nope.

Are you a jealous person?


yeah kind of

Have you ever fallen asleep with the last person that kissed you?
  

yes.

Is there someone that makes you happy every time you see them?


yes.

Honestly if you could go back 9 months and change something, would you?


prob not

When is the next time you will kiss someone?


tonight before bed probably

Are you wasting your time on someone?


i don’t think so

Who was the last person you were in love with for more than a year?


my boyfriend.

Were you happier 7 months ago or now?


now

Have you ever liked one of your best friends of the opposite sex?


yes.

Do you regret anything that you’ve said today?


no.

Do you have a secret life?


no.

Is there anyone you can tell EVERY THING to?


my boyfriend, my mom, and my sister

Do you ever get a text from someone that you don’t want a text from, and yell at your phone because your angry?


nah

So, the last person you kissed just happens to arrive at your door at 3AM, what do you do?


well i live with him so i’d be a little surprised if he was outside at 3 am instead of in bed

Have you ever liked someone who your friends HATED?


yeah

Have you ever seen the last person you kissed without a shirt?


yes.

Have you held hands with somebody in the past three days?
  

yes.

Do your parents know EVERYTHING about you?


pretty much, honestly.  i’m pretty open

Have you ever just felt like you could cry an ocean?


probably.

Are you dating the last person you talked to?


yes.

Would you live with someone without marrying them?


i am now

Is there someone you’d like to fix things with?


not really.

Are you friends with your best friend’s boyfriend or girlfriend?


my best friend doesn’t have a significant other right now

Who do you have texts from in your inbox?

lots of people

What do you do when you have a bad day?


cry or take a bath or read

Think back to the last person you held hands with, would you kiss them?
  

yes.

Will you be seeing your ex any time soon?


i highly doubt it

Do you think the last person you kissed cares for you?
  

yes.

Do you want someone you can’t have?


no.

What did you realize today?


i don’t know

Is there a person from the past that you would like to talk to?


maybe

Do you regret letting someone walk out of your life?


no.

Do you care if people hate you?


not really, honestly

What time did you wake up today
?

around 10 ish

Are you wearing jeans, shorts, sweatpants, or pajama pants?

pajama pants

Are you a different person now than you were 5 years ago?


yes.

What were you doing at 4 am?


sleeping.

Would you rather write a paper or give a speech?


write a paper, i hate giving speeches

What’s something you cannot wait for?


graduating college in 2020 lol

How many hours of sleep did you get last night?


8

Are you a morning or night person?

night.

Do you reply to all of your texts?


most of the time.

Favorite thing to eat with peanut butter?


jelly

What were you doing before you got on the computer?

taking a shower

What are your initials?


-

Do you still talk to the person you liked 4 months ago?


yes.

Have you had your birthday this year?


not yet.

What did you do yesterday?


work.

What will you be doing tomorrow?


work.

Is it hard to make you laugh?


nope.

Do you believe ex’s can be just friends?


yeah

How many people have you had feelings for in the year of 2013?

i don’t know, that was a while ago

Have you ever dyed your hair?


yes.

Was New Year’s Eve enjoyable?


not too bad, we didn’t really do anything

If you could move away, no questions asked, where would it be?

i have no idea

What would you change about your life right now?


nothing right now

Today, would you rather go forward a week or back?


forward.

Would you take $40,000 or a brand new car?


40k

Ever cried while you were on the phone with someone?


yes.

Do you automatically check your phone when you wake up?


usually

Have you ever stayed up all night on the phone?


yes.

Could you use some sleep right now?


very much so

Are you going to have a baby by the time you’re 18?


nah i’m older than 18 anyways

Does it bother you when someone hides things from you?


yes.

Have you ever slept in the same room with someone you liked?


yes.

Do you have a person of the opposite sex that you can tell everything to?


yes.

Is there someone who meant a lot to you at one point, and isn’t around anymore?


yes.

Do you have somewhere you hide things you don’t want anyone else to find?

nahh

Have you ever had your heart broken?  

yeah

How many languages do you know?

just one

Do you have any piercings?

two

If you had to get a piercing right now, what would it be?

i’d get my nose pierced or get some on my ear

On a scale from one to ten, how happy are you?

7

Have you ever cried uncontrollably on a friend’s shoulder before?

yeah

What were you doing 30 minutes ago?

watching Cops

Do you enjoy Disney movies?

for the most part

Do you have a nervous habit? (e.g. biting nails, tapping feet, smoking)

i bite the inside of my cheeks and my nails

Have you ever had a girl best friend?

yes.

Would you date a 13 year old at the age you are now?

heck no.  not tryna go to jail

Whats your favorite type of flower?

lilies

Current favorite song?

livin on a prayer

Are you happy with your given name?

yes.

What’s a major fear or yours?  

crashing my car

Do you know anyone famous?  

not personally

Do you own a Bible?  

no

What color is your bedroom?  

brown or tan ish

Do you consider yourself to be a nice person?

yes.

Have you ever pierced your own body part or that of someone else?  

nope.

What did you eat for breakfast today?

hashbrowns

What’s the temperature outside?

1 degree fahrenheit

Will you go to college a virgin?

i did lol.

Do you keep jewelry or small items in cute little boxes?

nah, not anymore

What was the worst job you’ve had? Why was it so bad?

it’s tough between steak n shake and shoe carnival.  they were both pretty awful lol.  just poor fucking management

Do you wish you had naturally rosy cheeks?

i don’t really care

What is one drug you have no interest in trying?

everything pretty much

What do you wanna be when you grow up?

successful and happy.

Do you have a crush on anyone?

more than a crush.

Do you get along better with men or women?

it just depends honestly

Purple or chartreuse?

idc

Aliens or ghosts?

aliens.

Favorite alcoholic drink?

angry orchard or any kind of cider

Favorite store?

i shop online a lot @ shein

Favorite animal?

cats

Who do you love the most in the whole wide world?

my family and boyfriend.

[saferincages]

(you might say we are encouraged to love)

I received an ask requesting I make this response its own post in full (which of course I don’t mind doing!) so here it is:

An anon in the original post asked why, “Anakin/Vader is seen as interesting for women,” and that could be a bit of a loaded question, but I think there’s a definite rationale behind it. The way it was phrased made me think of a post I saw which addressed the fundamental split between Anakin and Vader as seen by certain audiences, why Anakin is treated by many derisively because there’s an element of the “heroine’s journey” that happens in relation to his arc and the struggles he goes through. It’s here and it’s really interesting in its entirety. “The constant barrage of degradation and trauma and unfairness of a system that benefits at your expense and refuses to validate you for it. And some of that he might have been able to reconcile by “growing up,” the same way a lot of us learn to come to terms with social fuckery, but Anakin doesn’t get the space to do that. He gets a giant bundle of unaddressed trauma and psychological issues and handed a kind of ambiguous destiny about needing to save the entire universe.” <- Imagine the burden of that, and they put it on a child and then give him zero structure to cope with it.

I’m also going to add this comment from that post because I think it’s worthwhile to note: if someone makes you angry and you show anger with your very own face you are weak, you have lost face, you have shown yourself vain and driven by a selfish, animal, irrational, feminine urge to defend yourself; but if you show anger without a face, if you show it unpersonally (the less it’s connected to direct accusation or a specific ill), especially in order to execute a role, then you suddenly appear to be the one in the position of strength, because you can no longer be directly accused of selfishness. The more you can cloak anger in the guise of necessity, the more you meet the societal expectation to be dispassionate, rational, always controlled - the more justification and legitimacy and power to you, even though this mode of anger is often more destructive than the first. This dynamic, assuming it exists as I’ve hypothesized it, is why I think Anakin codes as feminine to many, while Vader appeals to a certain masculine ideal.

Basically, the gist of it is that the emotional turmoil, the trauma, the way he’s exploited for his talents or what he can provide others, the way his agency is stripped repeatedly from him again and again tends to not be the way “male” hero journeys are told. It’s feminine coding (unfortunately) for those themes to be explored. For those emotions to be plumbed and portrayed with a substantive sense of sorrow and helplessness in the central male hero - it is not the “macho” standard. Why they thought they’d get a macho, unyielding masculine power trip from Anakin Skywalker remains a mystery to me, this is the same series where its original hero, Luke (who is his son! of course there were going to be essential parallels and contrasts between them), purposefully throws his weapon away and refuses to fight, and is characterized by his capacity for intrinsic compassion rather than any outer physical strength (even Han is much less of a “macho” guy than dudebros tend to make him out to be - not only because he’s unmistakably the person in distress who has to be rescued from capture in ROTJ, he has a lot of interesting facets that break down that ‘scoundrel’ stereotype, but I digress other than to say I love the OT, and the subtle distinctions in Luke, Leia, and Han that make them break the molds of expectation). SW fundamentally rejected toxic masculinity and the suppression of emotions from its inception, Luke’s loving triumph and role as redeemer only happens because he refuses to listen when he’s told to give up on his friends or on his belief that there’s good in his father, his softness is his ultimate strength. Anakin was never going to be some epitome of tough masculinity, and George Lucas knew exactly what he was doing crafting him in that way. The audiences who wanted Bad Seed Anakin from the beginning didn’t know how to reconcile this sensitive, kind-hearted, exceedingly bright kid, with their spawn of the Dark Side notions, and I think, unfortunately, far too many then either rejected him completely or refused to understand what the central points in his characterization are about.

The fact that this narratively would have made no sense (if Anakin had been “born bad,” then there would have been no miraculously surviving glimpse of light for Luke to save - I’ve said this before, but imagine how profoundly essential to his true self that goodness had to be for it to even exist any more at that point, after all he’d suffered, after all he’d done. the OT tells us more than once what a good man Anakin Skywalker was, it’s part of what makes the father reveal as powerful as it is - if we hadn’t heard the fragments of stories about Luke’s father, it wouldn’t be nearly as shocking, but we KNOW he was a hero, an admirable man, a good friend). I can’t fathom how tricky telling the prequels had to have been to that extent - the audience knows what will happen in the end, it’s a foregone conclusion, we know he will fall, we know Vader will be created, we know the Empire will rise (though that would have happened even if Anakin had remained in the light, which is a whole other discussion). So the question became, who is this person? What influenced him? What shaped his destiny? And that ended up being a far more complex and morally fraught and stirringly emotional story than just “badass Jedi becomes badass Sith lord.”

That talented, highly intelligent boy is taken in by the Jedi after he has already developed independent thought and very intricate emotional dimension - the argument that he’s “too old” to be trained is because he’s not malleable enough to be indoctrinated the way Jedi usually treat the children they take. They may blame this on his attachment to Shmi, but she’s not the problem (if anything, had they not been so unfeeling and rigid, and had they freed her and allowed her to at least stay in contact with her son while he was training because it was a special case - they’re the ones who stick that “Chosen One” mantle on him, you’re telling me they couldn’t make an exception? but no, because they put that weight on him and then never help him carry it and constantly undermine it and question and mistrust him - Anakin would have been stronger in his training, and he would never have fallen to the Dark Side at all. There are so many moments, over and over, where his fall could have been averted, and everyone fails him to the bitter end, when he fails himself). 

And so he is traumatized, due to years of abuse and difficulties as a slave, due to having to leave his mother behind because the Jedi would not free her, due to being told to repress his emotions over and over again when he is, at his core, an intuitive and perceptively empathetic person (he wants to uphold that central tenet of his training - “compassion, which I would define as unconditional love, is central to a Jedi’s life”), yet he’s made to feel he is broken/wrong/constantly insufficient. He’s wounded by abandonment issues and lack of validation and the human connection/affection he craved, and he develops an (understandable) angry streak, he’s socially awkward due to the specific constraints/isolation of a Jedi’s life and due to the fact that they tried to stamp out what made him uniquely himself, which makes him continually conflicted with a never-ending pulse of anxiety (see absolutely ANY moment where he breaks down emotionally, and you’ll see him say something to the effect of “I’m a Jedi, I know I’m better than than this,” “I’m a Jedi, I’m not supposed to want [whatever very basic human thing he wants, because they make him feel like he can’t even ask for or accept scraps of decency]” - they fracture his sense of his own humanity, Padme tries to validate those feelings but that Code is a constant stumbling block in his mind). He is troubled by fear and the constant press of grief (I would argue he has PTSD at the very least), and all around he’s met by mistrust and sabotage. 

Male heroes shouldn’t be treated as infallible in their own narratives (none of them are that, as no character of whatever gender/origin is, as none of us are), but at the very least we usually see them treated with respect by others. Anakin often gets no such luxury. He’s treated the way we frequently see women treated, and that treatment comes from the same rotten core - the idea that emotions are weak, that expressing them makes you lesser, that crying is a sign of deficiency, that fragility of any kind cannot be tolerated. Anakin is even the hopeless romantic in this situation - Padme, while gracious and warmhearted, is much more pragmatic and tries to reason her way out of her blossoming love for him until she’s of the belief that it doesn’t matter anyway because they’re about to die, and she wants him to know the truth before they do. (I’d also like to note that the closest people to him all speak their love aloud when they’re at the point of death - Shmi when he finds her bound and tortured with the Tuskens, Padme in the Arena, Obi-Wan watching him burn on Mustafar, and how unbearably sad is that? even though his mother had said it before, even though he got to hear it many times again from Padme - and it’s her last entreaty to him - we shouldn’t be pushed to the brink of death to express it). Anakin is the one gazing at her dreamily and tearing up about it and professing earnest, dramatic love in front of the fireplace (idc what anyone says about the dialogue, the way he expresses himself is entirely sincere, it’s the rawness of that sincerity that I think makes people uncomfortable bc it’s unexpected), she’s the one who talks about living in reality. She, too, has been taught to guard and temper her emotions from her time as a child queen and the years she’s spent navigating the murky political waters of the Senate, but she’s become adept at it, unlike Anakin. If anything, they’re the only person the other has with whom they can be truly genuine and unafraid of exposing the recesses of their hearts, they’re the only safe place the other has, it’s no wonder they give themselves over to that, and the fact that they do is beautiful, it’s not wrong (which I have more cohesive thoughts on here and it was the underlying thesis of my heart poured into the super long playlist for them too /linking all the things). They see the joy and spirit in the other that no one else ever sees, and they make a home there.

Anakin becomes an esteemed general not only because he’s awesome in battle and strong in the Force and a gifted pilot and a skilled leader (all of which are true), but because he shows those around him respect, and great care. So, yet again, there’s a subversion of what might have been expected. No one is expendable to him. He views the Clone troops as individual human beings. He mourns their losses (many of the Jedi, with their no attachments rhetoric, allow the Clones to be used without much hesitation or thought for their status as sentient beings born and bred and programmed to die in war, but Anakin was a slave. He comprehends their status more than anyone else could). Anakin is a celebrated hero to the public, and in private is being chewed up by fear and uncertainty. Anakin is devoted to and completely in love with his wife, but has to keep it a secret. Anakin still craves freedom that even being a Jedi has not afforded him, because of their rigor. Anakin still desperately has to scrape for even the bare minimum of approval from the authority figures around him - even his closest mentor and friend, Obi-Wan, while they are irrevocably bonded and care for each other in a myriad of important ways, often doesn’t understand him and dismisses his feelings, refuses to advocate for/stand up for him when he needs it, or tells him to calm down. I’m surprised they never tell him he’s being hysterical when he gets upset, but the connotation of being told to “calm down” when angry or sorrowful or frustrated is something most women can identify with all too well. His desperate desire to protect Padme as everything begins to curl and smoke and turn to ash around him has a very clear nurturing aspect to it underneath the layers of terror and frustration and building paranoia - all he really wants is to be able to protect and care for his family, all he hopes is to save them and have a life with them away from all the war and the political in-fighting and the stifling Order. He’d quit right that second but he needs help due to his nightmares, and no one is willing to give it to him. (Except, ostensibly, Palpatine, who has been grooming him and deftly manipulating him and warping his perceptions since he was a child, all under the guise of magnanimous, almost paternal, care. Palpatine is brilliant in his machinations, perfectly cunning in his evil. He knows exactly how to slip in and break people, and he plays Anakin to the furthest extreme. I’m not saying Anakin doesn’t have choices, he does, and he makes the worst possible ones, but Palpatine pulls the strings in a way that makes him feel that he has no agency - and in truth, he does have very little agency throughout every step of his arc, marrying Padme and loving her in spite of the rules is one of the only independent choices he ever makes that isn’t an order, a demand, a fulfilling of duty - and Palpatine poises himself as the answer to all the problems, if Anakin does as he’s told. He’s been hard-wired to take orders for too long. He is so damaged by this point, and so distrusting - Hayden said something once about how Anakin is still very naive in ROTS, even after what he’s been through in the war, he’s still so young and unknowing about many things, and then his naivete is shattered by complete and utter disillusionment, and that shock is terrible and incomprehensible for him, so he clings to the one source of power he’s given, and it’s catastrophic). He is haunted by grief and impeded by fear of loss, and it drags him into an abyss. We watch all of this happen with bated breath, we see everyone fail him, we see every moment where he could have been helped, we see every path he could take if only he had the ability to stand up for himself and had been given the tools to cope with his psychological and emotional baggage, we see that he very nearly turns back, up until the death knell at the end. We know it’s coming from the moment they land on Tatooine and meet him and decide to make him a Jedi. We know, and we still hope for it to turn out differently. We know, and it still breaks our hearts.

I don’t want to make blanket statements about typical male viewers vs. typical female viewers, that’s too dismissive of a stance to take, but on a seemingly wider scale, I don’t think many of the former (especially the ones who were either older fans or who were teenagers themselves at the time) were as interested in political nuance and a tale of abiding love and a young man burdened with more than should ever have been put on his shoulders. Since the question was basically “why does he appeal to women,” (and not just cishet women) I imagine that the answer to that varies greatly depending on any one perceptive outlook, but has a similar core in each case of us wishing we could help change the outcome, even though we know we can’t, and of wanting to understand his actions and his pain, wanting to see his positive choices and his goodness validated, wanting to see him learn healthy strategies, wanting to see his love flourish, wanting to see him freed from the shackles he drags with him, from childhood to Jedi to Vader. The crush of the standards of society and expectation on him may speak to many. He is never liberated (until his final moments of free breath). His choices are either taken or horrifically tainted. His voice is drowned out by those more powerful around him. His talents and intelligence go largely unrecognized. His good, expansive heart is treated like a hindrance. The depth of his empathy and love is underestimated - and that, in the end, is important, because that underestimation, ending with Palpatine, becomes the Dark Side’s ultimate downfall and undoing. Vader may literally pick up an electric Palpatine and throw him down a reactor shaft, but that physical action is the final answer to a much more complete emotional and spiritual journey. He throws him down and the chains go with the slave master, and for the first time, certainly since before he lost Padme, his heart is unfettered, his love is reciprocated, and he is offered a true voice, a moment of his true self, a sliver of forgiveness, before being embraced again by the transcendence of the light. It is his act of rebellion, it is his own personal revolution, his final blow in the war. The entirety of the arc hinges upon him in that moment, Luke has been valorous and immeasurably valuable, but he’s done all he can do - the final choice is Anakin’s (and it’s such an interesting case because where else have we ever been able to fear and appreciate a villain, and then totally transform and re-contextualize him?). He is in that moment, indeed, the Chosen One.

All these facets are fascinating to watch unfold if you’re willing to be open-minded and heartfelt and sympathetic to the journey, if you’re willing to dig into the complex depth of his pathos.

I remember seeing AOTC as a teenager, and my love was Padme, she was where I was invested, I identified with her, I loved her kindness and her bravery and her sense of honor and justice, I loved that her femininity did not in any way diminish her and was an asset, I loved that, while she takes charge and has the fortitude to rush headlong to the rescue, while she can fight and tote a gun and blast a droid army as well as anyone, her superpowers are her intellect and her giving heart and gentle spirit. I totally get why Anakin holds onto the thread of hope she gives to him for all of those years, and why he falls in love with her as he does, but since I felt a lot of the story through her eyes, I understood why she was drawn to and fell in love with him, too. He’s dynamic and a bit reckless, he’s courageous, but he’s vulnerable and needs support, he’s deeply troubled but also radiantly ebullient at times (the scene in the meadow where she’s so touched by the carefree joy he exhibits, how it delights her and takes her aback, because she’s almost forgotten what it is to feel that, she’s almost forgotten other people could, and here he is, warm and teasing and spirited), he is often guileless, especially with her, he’s fervent and loving in a way she’s never seen or experienced, and that love is given with abandon to her. Who…wouldn’t fall in love with that? It’s a gravitational pull. AOTC impacted me in certain other personal ways as well, I was trying to understand some nascent hollows of grief (Anakin losing his mother as he does was very affecting and heartwrenching for me, at the time I’d lost my grandfather to whom I was quite close, and I’m also really close to my own mom, so his woe had an echo to me), but that vision that I specifically had of their love, the way I interpreted it (which I may not have had words for at the time, but I certainly had the emotional response) was a dear and formative thing.

I talked about this here, but to rephrase/reiterate, by the time ROTS came out, my life had shifted completely on its axis. I was still young, but my much dreamier teenage self was being beaten down and consumed by illness, and I was angry. Anger is not a natural emotion for me (guilt and self-blame tend to be where I bury anger), and I really didn’t know what to do with it. Everything felt unfair and uncertain, like there was no ground at all to stand on. I hurt all the time, literally and figuratively, I was in constant pain. I was lonely and frightened and sleep deprived and often had nightmares (this is still kind of true lol, as is the physical pain part). Padme was still my heart and touchstone - as she remains so to this day in this story - but suddenly I understood Anakin in a much more profound way, one I’ve held onto because he’s important to me and I love him. I felt his rage, his anguish, his desire to do something, anything, to somehow change or influence the situation, to rectify his nightmares, to cling to whatever might make a difference, might save him from being drowned in the dark and from losing everything that made him who he was as a person. Seeing him try and knowing he would fail was devastating, but also…relatable, in an abstract way (obviously not the violent parts, but thematically, I felt some measure of what it was to scramble up a foundation that is disappearing beneath you, that your expectations and dreams of what your life would be can vanish in disintegrating increments). All I wanted was for someone to help rescue him, because all I wanted was for someone to help rescue me. All I wanted was the hope that things could turn around - and there is hope in ROTS, despite the unending terror and tragedy, it’s never entirely gone, because Star Wars exists as a universe with the blazing stars of hope and love ever ignited at its center - but still, it was a very personally rooted emotional exploration for me, and I only started to deal with my own floundering anger when I saw how it might consume the true and loving and softer parts of me if I didn’t hold it back. (A few years later, I went through this again in an even worse way, and the source of that rage and despair was someone I cared for, and once I got through the worst bleak ugliness of it, there were a couple of stories I returned to in an attempt to gain newfound solace and comprehension, and Anakin and Padme were in there. My compassionate, hopeful heart was being torn by that fury, and I clawed my way back up from the brink of it because I knew I could die, not even necessarily figuratively, it was…a bad time, if I didn’t find my way out. Anakin’s story is a tragedy and a fable and a kind of warning - we should not deny or suppress our emotions or our authenticity, but we also cannot let it destroy us - and then ultimately his lesson is restorative, too, that we never lose the essential part of our souls, that we must allow ourselves to feel. Balance indeed). 

As consistent and transparent as my love for Padme has always been, my Anakin emotions are actually so close and personal that I intentionally avoided ever exposing them for actual years, it’s like…basically in the past month that I’ve ever been truly honest about it on Tumblr, because exposing that felt like too much, but I don’t really care about keeping it quiet any more, and that’s very cathartic. 

I myself am an incredibly emotional person, and I don’t believe that Anakin’s emotions are negative qualities, which I meant to underscore. In fact, his open emotions are an exquisite part of him, and it’s the Jedi who are wrong for trying to stamp that out, when his emotional abilities are part of what define him in his inherent goodness and his intellect and strength. He has an undying heart. For he and Luke both to stand as male heroes who represent such depth of feeling is really special, and vital to the story. Anakin is the most acutely human character in many respects, in his foibles and his inner strengths, in his losses and his longings and his ultimate return to his true self - that’s why we feel for him, that’s why we ache and fear for him, that’s why we rejoice for him in the end.

Other people could speak to the Vader part of it much better than I can, Vader’s an amazing and very interesting villain (the fact that, as Vader, Anakin is much more adhered to the Jedi code and way of thinking than he ever was as an actual Jedi, for example - he has an order to him, he is much more dispassionate, he is very adamant about the power of the Force - is endlessly intriguing, because he’s such a contradiction). I use this term for a different character, but I’m going to apply it here - Anakin is a poem of opposites. He is a center that can serve as either sun or black hole. He is a manifestation of love and light and heroism, he is a figure of imposing power and cold rage. He’s the meadow and the volcano. The question then becomes, how expansive are we? When we’re filled with the contradicting aspects of ourselves, how do we make them whole without falling apart? When we do fail, can we ever do anything to fix it? And the answers again will vary by individual, but to my mind - we’re infinite, and thus infinitely capable of, at any point, embracing our light, even if we’ve forgotten to have faith in it, and while we may not be able to fix every mistake or right every wrong, we can make a better choice and alter the path. The smallest of our actions can ripple and extend and are more incandescent than we know. That’s what he does, against all expectation. In the end, he is an archetype not only of a hero (be that fallen or chosen or divine), but of a wayward traveler come home, a heart rekindled, a soul set free to emerge victorious in the transcendent light.

In the final resonance of that story for me personally, I love him for being a representation of that journey, that no matter how long it takes to get there, how arduous it is - that things we lose can be found again, that with the decided act of compassion, pure, redemptive love can be held onto, that the light persists and that, even when it flickers most dimly, refuses to be extinguished, and can at any point illuminate not only ourselves, but can shine brightly enough to match the stars in the universe.

I hope this is at all cogent, here’s a gif for your patience ♥

[groundramon]

Homph I finished tri and I wrote down my thoughts as I was watching because I had too many funny shitposts and nobody to share them with bc charlie hasn’t watched tri yet

PS i wont be reblogging tri spoilers (besides MINOR stuff like, digivolutions of already confirmed digivolution lines or non-spoilery shitposts, but I’ll try to tag shitposts as #tri spoilers anyways [digivolutions specific to tri ill tag as well but not ones that were already basically confirmed]) for a while so ur safe here!  I’m just gonna like everything/most things because then I can rb em to hisyaryumon lmao (also u should check out hisyaryumon....its me n charlie’s digimon blog)

EP 1:

- ok. alright. ok. good. they’re dealing with kari’s emotions now instead of just. nothing.  ok. alright. cool.  Still dont like how obscure/”artsy” they’re being with it, this is digimon not kagerou project, but ok.

- Also. I stand by tk and kari being one of the few good straight ships in digimon.  just saying.

- kari: this is my fault... me: god damn it shut up you little brat also me: god relatable ALSO me: ill take whatever display of emotions i can get

- I love how nobody believes tai is dead like.  They’re upset and worried but they’re also like “nah. he cant be. that fucking asshole just left us in our time of need” (actually only matt is the last one)

- Gabumon i would die for you also im crying and I think that’s the first time tri managed to make me fucking CRY

EP 2:

- I had thoughts but then the 02 kids happened and I entered another plane of reality.  I don’t feel real right now

- the only one I can remember is evil!gennai being a dumbass and being like “SUFFER AND SQUIRM YOU PATHETIC HUMANS AS YOU FIGHT OVER THE LAST SEAT” 1. humans are KNOWN for their ability to care for others you dumb obvious fuck and 2. is. is the entire tube going? because that tube can fit too people if they squish.  This isn’t a joke I’m serious it can.

- oh yeah also when i saw whomstever the fuck his name is (adult guy who i love but fuck names) and he was all bloodied i was like “its a cold day in hell when i see blood in digimon” (I think there was blood in an earlier ep but shh idc)

EP 3:

- didn’t nishijima start off as a fucking life coach to these kids.  What the fuck he was supposed to help them find a career not emotionally scar them by bloodily dying in front of one of them

- im realizing that the reason hackmon was always in his cloak, in the shadows, standing still is that they cannot animate him in any normal position for the life of him.  I drew him with better anatomy when i was 14 and didn’t have a tablet.  No seriously, look:

I didn’t say it wasn’t bad, you guys are just underestimating how bad the anatomy on this poor creature is.  Why cant ppl draw dracomon or hackmon correctly imma cry

- ordinemon has the best reaction faces

the best part about these two screenshots is that they literally cut one to the other, first the first one to the second one and then it cuts back to the first one.  They were really proud of these stupid ass expressions.

- I started overcoming my dissociation shock from the second episode and my hypercritical mind was analyzing the shit out of everything that happened (it is Not happy) but then evil!gennai called kari and evil goddess and idk if he’s exaggerating to make her feel bad or if she’s literally a fucking god of chaos and destruction and either way im like

she did kinda like.  Watch wizardmon die, watch tai die, watch gatomon get absorbed.  The dark ocean is just a metaphor for depression and honestly if 02 wasn’t all over the fucking place I think Kari would’ve had some pretty decent development in it.  Actually you know what, I’m using that as an angle to approach Tri at now, wish me luck bc i might actually give it more leeway now

EP 4:

- I’m not dissociating but I forgot to say anything again and I already forgot what happened

- Cant believe mei is fucking dead

EP 5:

- I like to imagine that Tai got there like a few minutes ago, but he was like “well damn guess yall figured it out without me.  alright ill just. see if I need to do anything” and then meicoomon was Still Bad so he waited for when she struck just to make the most badass entrance possible.  Fucking extra ass bitch

- I forgot to write anything again but uhhh I wasn’t satisfied so anyways lets just get into the Juicy Details

Originally I was actually planning to be kinder to Tri than I expected.  Was very invested during it.  ‘Round the end of the last ep I realized hmmm no this isn’t working out.  Where are the 02 kids.  You should’ve brought them in to save the day.  That would’ve been SO cool and SO fun.  Fucking cowards.

god I’m kinda tired so I’m going to address a couple things I still had problems with, note that this isn’t everything it’s just everything I felt comfortable yelling about without rewatching past eps.  Like I forgot nishijima was all bloodied and presumably died in the last part until they brought it up and I was like “????” ALSO DID THE LADY WHO WAS HIS PARTNER OR W/E KILL HERSELF WITH THE GUN SHE FOUND, I JUST REALIZED LITERALLY AS I WAS TYPING THIS THAT SHE FOUND A GUN AND THEN I THINK IT CUT TO BLACK AND I’M

DID SHE FUCKING KILL HERSELF WHAT THE FUCK

anyways my problems:

1. They did joe. really dirty.  I’ll write a more proper rant on this sometime later (mostly bc charlie is MUCH better at talking about joe than I am) but basically I can tell you that his character development in the movies squandered his OG character development.  He’s basically an entirely different person.  Like Tri joe isn’t bad, besides being largely neglected (yes he has a whole half a movie to himself, no that doesn’t make up for it all), its just...not OG joe.  He’s a fine character just not the same character, and its NOT fine when you put the two together.

2. THEY DID THE 02 KIDS EVEN DIRTIER IM SO BITTER sorry you nostalgia-blind, money-hungry fucks at bandai, but the 02 cast is PART OF THE ADVENTURES UNIVERSE.  The only people who hate 02 are ones who like the characters but hate the mess of the storyline at the end, or are completely irrational and elitist about their love of the digimon series and would greatly re-evaluate their opinions if they watched the original series and 02 back to back.  They couldn’t even show them in some kind of group montage at the end??? Standing in the background when they call Mei???  Why couldn’t they call mei from a home phone also, but that’s a less important problem idc that much.  It was a cute scene besides the lack of 02 characters.  Whatever.  AND THE PROBLEM IS LIKE kari and tk?  This entire time???  Were like “oh they disappeared. oops” instead of being frantically searching for their lost friends???  Like i get tk and kari probably have fucking ptsd and can’t express any emotions because they watched important people die in front of their eyes at an incredibly young age but also 1. they didn’t address the ramifications of ptsd, so fuck that theory/excuse and 2. THAT??? WOULD ONLY MAKE THEM LOOK HARDER??? and put on a brave face as they look, but inside they’re so scared and so worried.  Not just “oh sweet, they were found/saved, theyre in the hospital but that’s fine” like WHAT theyre fucking assholes if that’s what they’d canonically do lmao.  God I am SO bitter over the ENTIRE thing with the 02 kids, it would’ve been BETTER if they were deleted from the fucking canon entirely.  Would I have still been bitter?  Yes.  But at least I wouldn’t be madder at TK and Kari too.

3. I stand 100% by the notion that Digimon is not and will never be cut out to be an adults’ franchise.  It wasn’t designed for adults, and it can’t be skewered towards adults.  These particular characters were designed for kids to relate to and find entertaining.  They do not work when placed into an adult setting.  Like, can you imagine a character like Ed from FMA going to the Digimon world?  I guess in a way that’s just Marcus but like.  Just imagine the FMA cast in Digimon Adventure.  It doesn’t work.  Digimon Tri is basically that except real.  Also Data Squad was darker than Adventure so my joke doesn’t even work.

I guess my primary point is that Tri isn’t mature enough of a setup for an adult audience.  It puts a focus on being “complex” and “philosophical” instead of working within Digimon’s constraints and making something good and adult out of that.  Like!  Digimon is a fucking TOY COMMERCIAL.  Don’t give me messages about the futility of human life.  I want bad puns and emotional characters.  That’s what Digimon has ALWAYS been, and ideally always will be.  Tri could’ve made itself more mature by dealing with the ramifications of the Digital World’s events, how it affected the kids psychologically and dealing with healing old scars.  It would’ve been a more mature take on a story we loved and would use things we loved about the story already - the fact that it took so much time exploring characters’ emotions and was surprisingly mature for the time - to make itself better.  You need to take the aspects that drew adults to the show and amplify them, not just slap on a complex story and unfunny dialogue and be like “oh this is fine, right?”

It’s not that Digimon can’t exist as an adult property, its just that if it repeats what Tri did, it’s got no merit and in my eyes the franchise is dead.  If it survives I guess I’ll be happy that people can still enjoy it but I find it unsustainable and unsatisfying to fans of the older series.  Tri is just a fuckfest of highly specific nostalgia that tries too hard to appeal to old fans without capturing what made the original series so magical, and in part thats because the original series WASN’T FOR ADULTS.  I don’t know about the Digimon Story games, bc they’re T-rated so perhaps they’re a better take on an adult Digimon story than Tri?  But you either need to make your own characters and lore specifically for an adult-oriented Digimon season, or perish.  Also, please make it a series and not a group of movies.  Getting four eps every 6-9 months was hell.

I stand by saying Appmon is a more faithful Digimon season than Tri to Digimon’s original spirit.  I believe it holds more potential for success than Tri and better embodies the spirit of the older Digimon seasons.  It’s dumb, its corny, it has horrible puns, but I LOVE it because it also has a deep dark story and emotional moments.  If you dislike Tri and you agree with things I said that make it unlikeable, I highly recommend giving Appmon a chance - if you watch a few episodes and think “oh yeah, I guess this is decent” you’re going to like it.  It’s everything Digimon has always been and hopefully always will be, just with a different concept.  And hopefully the end of the series doesn’t leave a sour taste in my mouth and I have to redact this statement haha since I’m not done with it yet, but I’ve heard good things about it so I’m hoping not so.

Overall, if you watch Tri, don’t get your hopes up.  It resolves everything okay-ish but it’s a pretty forgettable anime on its own and simply doesn’t work as part of the Digimon franchise.

I am, however, pretty interested in what evil!gennai said at the end about Diaboromon and Daemon.  It raises interesting questions about the timeline too.  We know Daemon is in the dark ocean, so perhaps that’s a hint at a future project?  (They did confirm a future project btw, in conjunction with tri being over)  But what about Diaboromon?  I dont believe that Our War Game (I think thats what its called?) took place after Tri, based on the outfits and ages and stuff, but I also don’t remember the movies that well.  Could Diaboromon still be out there too?  It’s interesting.

However, because of the lackluster performance of Tri, I don’t have my hopes up and I really hope that this “next project” goes in a different direction.  Although I guess if they include the 02 kids, I’ll be somewhat less salty...

Side note, did they ever explain why the gennais went evil?  Like ?  That’s a pretty important thing.  The gennais helped SAVE the human world in 02.  And I get that apparently Tri is ignoring 02′s ending but still.  It’s shitty, because Gennai was still a good guy in the original too (and also they cant just keep is younger look and act like 02 never happened)  MAYBE its something I missed but I dont think so.  God there’s just.  So much wrong with Tri.  I’m very displeased and very bitter and I wanna get back to Appmon asap.

It’s got good moments, its got bad moments, I dont know, I don’t care.  There’s nothing wrong with you if you like it, there’s nothing wrong with you if you don’t, and there’s nothing wrong with you if you flip flop and are split like me.  I just wish Tri fulfilled its potential instead of becoming a boring mess.

[naruot]

How do you feel about shikamaru?

I might get some heat about what I’m gonna post because EVERYONE loves shikamaru but Idc (this post is SUPER long)

Okay I actually did like shikamaru especially in the beginning of naruto part one he was just a lazy kid that became a ninja because its father told him to or whatever he didn’t really care he rather just sleep and then we were told he was Brilliant and all that and I was like okay cool

he wasn’t very strong or anything however if his teammates and close childhood friends ino and choji were in danger he would step up and get off his ass! I really liked him in the beginning because he wasn’t all about naruto he was more about his own team

But ugh he went down hill once he saw asuma sensei die (I hate asuma don’t get me started lol) he changed so bad and I hated how they only focused on him like he was the ONLY one who lost there sensei! asuma left a woman pregnant but we only care about shikamaru feelings? We didn’t see how choji or ino felt about losing there sensei like it’s crazy

Anyways the whole hidan fight… there were SO many things wrong with the fight however the first thing wrong is WHY DOES SHIKAMARU GET TO GO OUT AND GET REVENGE BUT SASUKE CAN’T?¿? like the hidden leaf is soooo anti revenge but they let shikamaru (I’m not adding choji and ino because they didn’t do anything in the fight) go out and kill hidan wtf?

Also second thing wrong with the fight is shikamaru is suppose to be this amazing genius right? And he had this amazing plan in his head right? But what was this amazing plan? They didn’t know kakashi was going with them until last minute However they only reason they got out alive was kakashi (and then naruto and Yamato got there later) so how were they gonna win or at least SURVIVE if kakashi didn’t go with thim?

thing is they say shikamaru is this *genius* but we never really get to see his amazing brain at work! he always comes up with subpar plans plus he’s always over confident ino and choji could’ve died in that fight but he didn’t even think about that he just wanted revenge and his plans always have a bunch of “what if’s?” Surrounding them! Like what if kakashi didn’t get kakazu blood? What if hidan cut shikamaru legs instead of his face? What if naruto and Yamato didn’t get there in time? What if kakashi didn’t show up AT ALL!?!?!

Another thing about the fight is that THEY ALL SHOULD’VE HAVE DIED or at least been gravely injured listen shikamaru is not skilled enough to take on hidan during the fight Idc what anyone says he was a chunin yes he’s *smart* however his strength is meh at best

during the hidan and asuma fight you can see clearly how skill hidan is!! like nothing is touching him shikamaru already tried his shadow techniques and he ain’t even come close hidan was flipping and flying through the fucking air!!!

So how is a average chunin beating a s-class criminal? It doesn’t add up Idc how *smart* you think this boy is

Oh and one part I hate during the fight is when kakashi is fighting hidan with a fucking kunai! Hidan is an amazing fighter especially with his scythe so how can a man wielding a dumb ass kunai be able to take on hidan and his scythe? Makes no sense!

Another thing I hated is how they made choji and ino USELESS in the fight ino could’ve distracted kakazu with a mind technique while choji and kakashi go for the kill or she could’ve let choji and kakashi work together to *defeat* kakazu (like idk why kakashi swear he had to do it alone) and ino distracted hidan with her mind techniques and shikamaru finishes him off?

Shikamaru is just to full of himself and everyone in the naruto verse praises him for subpar plans? Like the war arc the best plan he had was to let everyone make some weak ass earth wall and people told him if anyone can make that wall it won’t be strong enough and he just doesn’t LISTEN! It’s because he’s so *smart* that he thinks he’s always right or he can’t ever make a mistake like EVERYONE makes mistakes

HE JUST DOESN’T THINK OUT HIS PLANS CLEARLY

Also I didn’t like the way hidan died I thought it was pretty cruel? I’m just saying aren’t they the “good guys” but letting him rot in a ditch is horrible and cruel punishment I rather him rot in a cell for the rest of his life but that’s my personal opinion anyways there’s a lot more I can say but I’ll just end it here

so to summarize everything I just said I don’t like shikamaru because:-They say he’s smart but his actions don’t make me believe he’s really a genius

-His character went to shit after asuma died

-He never thinks he’s wrong

-He’s so full of himself

-And everyone praises him for weak ass strategies

Thanks for the ask 🤗

[survivor-islands-of-adventure]

EPISODE 9

As frustrating as the blind vote was, Timmy went home, thankfully. There wasn’t a lot of drama or anything, but I still want to touch base with everyone regardless.

Mark made a group chat comprised of all of the original Villains kinda out of nowhere. Named it "OG Villys", which is dangerously close to copyright infringement with the thing I have with Chris and Drew. They're targeting Tracey, which I'm not crazy about. She's really proven herself these last couple of days to me, and I'd rather see a villain go than a civilian.

I knew that "OG Villys" chat was sus. According to Drew, Ricky went rouge and told him that the plan isn't to vote out a Hero, it's to vote out a Civilian. Tracey is just an easy target, and after her, it'll be a domino effect. Not gonna lie, I feel a little betrayed, but at least I've got an excuse to work with the Heroes.

We love tea and our allies winning the special powers! Pat just told me he won the blind reward comp! So exciting. I do consider Pat a very close ally in this game. He has a Sapphire Idol and this is definitely something we can utilize down the road. I knew it would be some cracked ass idol knowing Monty specifically haha. I was worried someone like Sammy or Mark would have it but knowing where it is, is certainly helpful. I feel like I’m in a decent spot in this game, it’s just going to be tricky not being caught on both sides. I have my OG heroes on one side, and my civilian boys on the other side. Realistically Mark or Tracey going doesn’t really negatively impact my game in any shape or form. I think Mark going is big because it’s the first real big move of the game. It could open things up between Sammy and I and other OG villains that didn’t get swapped. It’s also a positive for Tracey to go because I literally have no allegiance to her. She hasn’t told me the truth about my name being thrown around (even tho it was fake) and she honestly just isn’t online as much as she should be to chat. I really don’t know which way I’m voting tonight, but it will likely be what’s best for my game personally without making any waves??? What that is??? Who knows.

Why does Ricky hate me so much like he comes for me in every game we play together, I just don't know what I did to him to make him hate me so much. 

A.T. told me that Mark should go home because we should vote a villain out, but i dont 100% agree with it. Now apparently votes are going for Madison which I 200% don't agree with because apparently Ricky wants her out. Idk who to vote for at this point but it sure as hell isn't for Madison. I might need to vote Mark but I'll still be upset if he leaves. Who else is gonna call me Mami?

So apparently AT is a rat? And so is stoner? And mark could be going home? Like what the hell is happening. I really need Madison or AT to go home and it ain’t fair I don’t get my way all the time ugh! I am perfect! 

Positives I won immunity I'm at least tying my worst placement, hopefully beating it I had a really good hiding spot Negatives: An ally is leaving tonight I have no traction in this game Getting out of double digits is gonna be nearly impossible I spent an entire day of my life defending a fucking hiding spot I'm sad like all the time Why am i here

This week has been fucking crazy. Dan is the only one that know that I TOLD MARK THATVHE WAS BEING TARGETED. And my final goal was to save Madison and mark and I think that me and dan and Chelsea actually pulled it off. I am SO BERVOUS for this vote. This has been one of the most hectic survivor days I have ever had ever. 

Whewwwwww so I survived blind week and timbo is goooooone! He was mad on his way out talking about big moves and stuff gfhgjgjbjh so immunity happened and drew got it which leaves me in a panic bc I feel like vulnerable and obvs my name was brought up but now everything is getting messy and I might be fine after all????? So initially I wanted to go for one of the heroes but then AT came to me and was like we should vote mark instead and I'm like wow he's really goin after his own ppl,?!?! So like Chelsea got wind of this plan and told mark about it which makes me wonder if they are close or if Chelsea wants the villains to self destruct ???? Either way it could keep me safe so idc!!!!!! So like Madison's name has also been brought up but I think with the two boys targeting each other she may be safe too, which sucks bc fuck the heroes but oh well. Anyway in conclusion this tribal is gonna be messy and idk what will happen cyrhdjfgg like my biggest fear rn is that the heroes are tricking both sides of the villains in order for us to split and then they have majority and vote for like me or smth idk if that's even viable at this point but I'm worrying anyway dhdjdjndjd I think my best bet may be with voting for mark but we'll see how it goes 

This week has been fucking crazy. Dan is the only one that know that I TOLD MARK THATVHE WAS BEING TARGETED. And my final goal was to save Madison and mark and I think that me and dan and Chelsea actually pulled it off. I am SO BERVOUS for this vote. This has been one of the most hectic survivor days I have ever had ever. 

okay so i has the hiding spot first bc i saw the rule where if you had it for an hour then like u win. So i was like okay y’all like I’m about to pop off and win this thing. Then the rule got changed  and I was like oop and pmed drew telling him to take it and he could have it LMAO. I didn’t tell anyone that tho bc I don’t want people to think I’m working w him. I wanna trust drew so badly but i know how smart he is and how he can snap crackle and pop my neck in a sec. so i ended up sleeping really good bc i didn’t care about the challenge bc i don’t think I’m in any real danger. In order to win this game tho i need to make some power moves. I really want to separate myself from mark even tho we have f2 but like i wanna be f2 with Dan or like Tracey or something. Or Charlotte/pippa. I just know that mark has a target on his back and i could potentially get one on mine by association. I have barely talked to any of the heroes so i gotta up my social game. Also AT has annoyed me a lot and I have my little alliance the suggestion of voting him out and they legit just turned it down. UMM NO YALL, I’ve been through this before and I’m not going through another alliance where what i day doesn’t matter. By the end of the night I’ll get what i want. That put up a red flag for me bc it shows that the alliance isn’t really like showing thought about my plan and that madison should go home tonight. I low key didn’t care much for madison and the start bc like we don’t talk but i want to work with her and like pat more. Umm i think that’s all that has happened but I’ve heard several names(Madison/Mark/Dan/AT/Tracey) as long as it ain’t me I’m good HOLLA.

lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol andrew? ANDREW? fucking andrew tried to get me out. my goodness what a terrific joke that was. The second he brought my name up every hero came to me and told me. the best part is im not close with any of them other than pat lol. then he tried to be cute on call and i shut that down too. imagine how embarrasing that mustve been. so confident on call for absolutely nothing. the only thing that might come back at me on that vote was when i told madison that stoner targetted her last round LOL he def didnt do that but im a fucking villain for a reason so yolo. anyways the foursome of me sammy charlotte and ricky is like well known now but im p sure pat and chelsea want me to stick around and work with me. eventually well have to cut ricky so that way me and sammy dont look so suspicious. im gonna try and fade into the background for a couple rounds but that wont happen. if it were up to me the next three votes would be dan drew and then stoner. dan and drew are just such challenge beasts and it breaks up the alliance of chelsea pat dan and madison and stoner is just a flake and does whatever he wants which is scary.  ok im bored of typing bye

[survivor-marianas-trench]

“I TOOK A PHOTO WITH AN ONCOMING TRAIN!!!” - EPISODE 2

Me not being first boot??? *NUT BUTTON MEME* Amanda slaying and staying??? *NUT BUTTON MEME* Carson going and me, Liana, Christine, Lily, and Sam still being here even though we aren't officially aligned???? *NUT BUTTON MEME*

Ahhh me and kait did that i didnt expect it, im not sure how everything worked ut but it was wild whew, so many votes, im wary of kait cause she mightve lied to me but im hoping i can trust her

i only sent 1 pic for immunity so then i get lowest and i have chance of getting to cave or exile or whatever the heck and then hopefully i get idol and win the whole game woohoo

Well, that was a messy af tribal but it worked! I mean after the hell I went through, voting rob, then voting Amanda, then voting daisy only to find out I was too late and had to stick with rob! Like wtf. And for daisy to go home on a 3-2-1-1-1 with 2 null votes.  Like ok. And now we have a selfie olympics!!! Currently I'm sitting pretty with a 30% advantage in the challenge and 84 photos of things with the beginning letter for M or T!!!! I really would like to win this and stay immune for as long as humanly possibly lol. These tribals are messy right now because loyalties are just being formed Speaking of loyalties!! AMANDA!! I already love her #ThanksAHud! And I'm so glad that we are buddies! I'm just hoping that things work out for the both of us

That vote was a mess it seemed on Rob and Kait's tribe. Glad they stayed and Christine survived too. I'm not surprised Kait's tribe already voted for her, meanwhile the rest of us are sitting over here like: https://68.media.tumblr.com/894a6591ab3e2d171e8fec5d31ecbaeb/tumblr_omkup57QeN1r1gu3po1_400.gif

So Darian wins immunity.... https://media2.giphy.com/media/Rhhr8D5mKSX7O/200.webp#6 but I am also like  https://media0.giphy.com/media/IqO3mXbMLztHa/200.webp#4 See, I love Darian, but the issue is, I'm not sure if i can trust him, so he sort of needs to go soon,  but I see him sort of clean sweeping these immunities and that makes me a little worried honestly. I don't know what to expect this time around, and I am about to start sweating.... https://media0.giphy.com/media/VB5WwlZIt8eRy/200.webp#1

I'm a mess *takes a shot of vodka* I had 125 photos and forgot to turn them in. I TOOK A PHOTO WITH AN ONCOMING TRAIN! 

This feeling around camp has been so strange and I'm not sure if it's because I won or just because every tribal isn't gonna be the same. I had more people talking to me for the first tribal like right after results were posted and serious game talk with the whole tribe. Yesterday night only Sam, Lily, Christine and Dan messaged me but we didn't even talk game. (Well I guess that's about the same amount of people, but like the conversations were less in depth like they were the first time.) I just feel aimless in this game and I don't really have a good strategy. I'm not even sure I want to make it far because it always gets ugly once you get far enough. Lily just solidified our alliance of 4 (Dan, me, Sam, and her) and I think it'll be easy enough to ride it out with them for a while. I'm wary because I don't have anyone I'm really close to (because these are people I usually don't play with!) so I kinda feel like I'm on the bottom. Lily and Dan seem to closest and I know in the past Sam will have multiple close allies and not necessarily stay loyal to one overall. Kelsey freaking randomly disappeared again! If anything I'd trust him a bunch because he's new and I can influence him more easily probably into giving me information and voting with me, but I can't do that with this weird continued activity/inactivity. Might he actually be a catfish? We will never know. Also!! Silly Gabby and Jonny having too much fun in One World last night. I knew Jonny was in Rakiura but that's basically it. Now I know they know each other irl probably thanks for the tea y'all!! (ricky, goodness, you have too many friends in this game since I'm pretty sure you know sara irl too with all these Washington/barista coincidences!)

Moments later...

Oh! Yeah I forgot to mention that I'm trying to get the tea about the loser place since unfortunately I did not lose. I'm not close to Veronica (as in I have not talked to her since Day 1) so I have low chances of finding out from her, but I talked to Billy last night and asked him to ask Chrissa about it. Though he said earlier how he's not close to Chrissa so I'll probably end up asking her myself! :/ Since I don't plan on going to loser place, I need to make friends with everyone who goes so they can give me all of their idols/advantages...or at least agree with me on how to use them!!

I want Sam gone!!!

Why was I stupid enough to pick the thing that makes me inelegible to compete in challenges? I'm an idiot. 

so i don't know how to vote this round and no one is talking! like are you guys serious omg 

Sorta feeling indifferent about the challenge I tried super hard! But either way congrats to all that won! Someone had like 100ish I think I saw? Oh hellll no girl doing the most. Nervous for trible tonight it'll be my first! I don't think I'm going home though, I talked to Jordan and he said hunter because he didn't submit anything for the challenge and is pretty quiet. I don't even know the kid but as long as it's not me ya know! TBH if it had been my decision I would have voted Julia. The girl has "I love being beautiful" or some shit like that as her fucking quote on skype like ew girl your hella extra. 

i like kait and amanda

I'm just like so over Sam so I'm trying to get him out as revenge for Eddie. Fake ass. If I can't get him out in Emathia, might as well get him out here.

20 minutes later...

My allies are Rhea, Kait, and Darian (even if he did vote for me). I like Emma but I know she's probably upset about the first vote. Sam and Steven, you can go. I can try and bring in Andie and Amanda close to me, but it will be fishy to do it now. That's on my tribe. I like Jenn too, and Sam, and Shea <3. You never know in this game, I might go out, but I think my position in the tribe may increase? I can see it. I love Rhea so much. She's the purest cinnamon roll I've ever met. <3 100%

OKAY! So now that I actually have time, I've been talking to people on my tribe a lot more. I've been talking to Billy, Chrissa, Jonny and Gabby and they all are reasonable people. Whilst talking with them we talked about how Hunter is pretty inactive in the game and that we could look at him as a potential first boot from the tribe. The whole twist of us being in One World and only have individual immunity has kind of flipped the entire game on it's head. Usually, weaker members of the tribe are targeted because they're a liability but weaker players don't really matter as much this season because tribal immunity exists. Which means that people that are stronger in challenges may start to be targeted to give those weaker people a better chance at winning individual. Honestly, good job Ricky and Monty because I've never seen this before and it's kind of fun. 

Well I didn't win the last challenge... My document glitched and I lost most of my pictures, but the fact that I would have won still keeps me going!

Kait is the best duo every she cuts the shit and gets right to the point and we murder everyone together its so fun. That being said I can't wait until i get to a point where i can work with my loves Luke and Dan. Also im going out and ACTUALLY having a social life so this is all the updates youre getting from me tonight! Wooooo

i cant believe i worked to get a self vote when i already had one like the FUCK why do bad things happen to slightly nice people 

I literally don't know what's happening bc I've been gone all day bc it's spring break, but I know I'm not going so BLESS

Well. Officially in an alliance with dan, Sam, and Liana. I love it. We are called the game changers but I wonder if everyone is doing that right now. Veronica should be going tonight, but I question if it should be shea. But I think Veronica is a good vote right now and shea would be better for the following vote. I don't know honestly if either goes it doesn't matter too much to me. I love this whole tribe but someone has to go. 

I confess to shovin a whole bag a jellybeans up my ass.

so basically this round i lost immunity again but idc bc i know these ho's and they not gonna do anything... I hope. So basically the plan was for veronica to throw immunity and get last so she could go on the reward and scout it out for steven and i bc us 3 r in a alliance. she did but she got a self vote. basically everyone wanted to vote veronica but bc of sheas fight with carson we r voting shea. i feel bad bc i like shea but i cant lose veronica this early. i put my neck out on the line so if i get sent home ill be sad but ill def understand why

ALLL RIGHT so this round i haven't done much/heard anything BUT IM WATCHING BAYKOR WILSON PLAY MUSIC AT JONNY FAIRPLAYS BIRTHDAY PARTY AND THE DEAD GRANDMA IS HERE 

My drunk ass needs to write a confessional in the next hour oops!! I hope that Veronica goes but apparently it's either Veronica or Shea. I just really hope it's not me. My tribe is quiet as fuck so I have no clue what's really hoping. Here's hoping my drunk ass makes it through 

i'm dead @ finding the idol. my goal is to idol liana out i think that'd be a boppin time, but for now i just wanna like continue not really doing a whole lot and let rob keep being out there on everyone's radar while i just say that no one talks to me so i can get more tea from them bc they think i'm in their back pocket. voting sam tonight.............i'm poppin' bottles! nah idrc about him leaving, he never talks to me and it's always like really forced when i go out of my way every fucking time to start a conversation with him. it's just really frustrating like i hate this tribe so much. social game says hello, freaks! i kinda hate having the idol because it's so much pressure to like play it at the right time and premerge is so delicate, especially with so many people and with me not really having a TIGHT alliance i just whew.

I think I'm going :( no ones socializing with me. Billy is just a cop out, says he doesn't want to throw out a name. Pssstt

My, my, my. What a LOVELY week this has been. So currently, our tribe is back at it again with dat council swag. I didn't do well in immunity, like I knew I would. However, if anyone can win, I'm very glad Miss Moana SNATCHED the title. Last tribal council, I flopped. I was inactive and that's unacceptable so this week I'm really pushing myself to be a deciding factor force like Ariana Grande deciding to snatch weaves when she breathes. With my reputation currently, I don't think people really assume that I even have it in me to be strategic. Little do THEY know...they are wrong. AHAHAHAHAHAHHAA. Now, Seamus has informed me that the vote is Shea. However, Seamus is a GOOBER. Shea and I have really become close and the fact that Seamus literally pms me to vote Shea BEFORE asking me how I am shows his inner Kesha: his True Colours. I don't really like the fact that Seamus is just treating me like a free vote because I know what his intention. I already can smell that he wants to drag me as a cute, innocent vote until he makes the merge with his best friends and takes me out. THAT'S going to be a no zone. Although that is the persona I'm going for, I feel like Seamus already has suuuuch a big plan for getting to the end and...I'm not a part of that. And if you're going to count me out, henny, count on getting to stepping. Or something exotic like that, tee hee~! I feel really nervous for Shea. I told her that Seamus was wanting to eliminate her and she immediately almost spoiled everything. She's an emotional player and that's the kind of I want to keep around. Those are the ones who never see through my fakeness and the kind that are targeted before good ol' sweetheart me. The only other option is Veronica so for this week, I'm going to try and flip a few people to do so. The last vote was so unified that it's quite scary actually...if things keep going the way they are, I have no doubt that eventually it'll be my log chopped by the axe. My advantage for this week's vote is that no one really has a reason NOT to trust me. With Veronica, they KNOW she's a scrappy player. And I believe I can use that to my advantage. Y'all don't know me, y'all don't know what I've been through! And NO ONE is going to believe that cutesy little Arianator weeabo is pulling strings. I learned from my past Tumblr competitions that playing aggressively gets out fast. I know now playing passively gets you treated like a child. Here...everything has to be subtle. Small little touches, here and there. And if you do enough of that, maybe the trickle of water can erode the rock. That's what I'm hoping to do here. If somehow, we can do the impossible, not only will I establish myself as a real C.O.M.P.E.T.I.T.O.R in this tribe, but I'll have pulled off a blindside that's really shocking and game changing. Maybe it's a bit too early to be calling shots...but I've got to do something. I think people already have caught on to the fact that something's afoot and the alarms are already blaring. I'm past the point of no return, so even if I wanted to, I can't allow myself to have regrets! I carry the name of a queen of BBCAN and a king of The Vampire Diaries. I'm here to slash throats, save my family and wear ugg boots. And hopefully...this is the start of something legendary~! Wish me luck, darlings! Certainly sincerely, Canada's Self-Proclaimed Favourite; Kelsey Mikaelson! <3

ALRIGHT...So I'm really hoping Shea goes this tribal cause like....He can't be chill for one second in this game.  Literally the plan was to get Veronica out but once he hears his name he quits? C'mon now.. Don't even get me started on Kelsey telling him his name was thrown out cause like!?!? We're doing that so no one gets in trouble here why are you doing this!?!? I just don't understand Kelsey like I really wanted to like her but...She's on thin ice at this point. I just hope this isn't a ploy and something goes wrong but I guess we'll see!

So like wtf is happening, cause I don't have a clue. I'm loyal to Emma and I guess maybe Rhea. Idk Rhea just talks to me sometimes but right now that is good enough for me. Right I'm just waiting for a tribe swap so we can stop going to tribal every round