#you can tell in the last gif that he is beyond pissed off

[no-one-fights-alone]

[lilbitdepressed27]

Tara Carpenter/Fem!Reader She’s the Man AU

Summary: inspired by she’s the man, with a few changes

Warnings: Chad’s a bit of a jerk but nothing else really

WC: 9.3k

Author’s Note: sorry for any mistakes. Hope y’all enjoy:)

"What?!"

"Sorry girls but I can't really do anything about it."

"But we win more games than the boys do!!"

"Yea what the fuck why aren't they the ones getting cut."

"What?! No you don't, you guys just face other girls that don't know how to play."

You couldn't believe what you were hearing. You couldn't believe you dated him. To be fair you had been sexually confused for a long time. Battling your inner self to be true to who you were. Frankie was your ex boyfriend and you honestly wanted to slap yourself every time you looked back at that relationship. You honestly didn't know what you were thinking.

"Oh really you guys haven't won a game since like what freshman year?" You backfired. "Can't even win a game against the schools rivals, Woodsboro Panthers." The boys in front of you glared at you knowing that it was always a touchy subject. The team had always been sore losers.

"I'm sorry girls but we have to practice unlike some people." The couch and the boys laughed as they walked away.

The girls team was left standing on the field feeling a mix of emotions. You were beyond pissed and there was absolutely nothing you could do.

*

You had been walking home, your music blasting in your ears. You had been extremely bummed out, your dream had always been to play soccer in the big leagues. Wanting nothing more than to play with your idols. Couldn't really do that if your school doesn't have a girls team. You would have to transfer to another school that does have one but you'd doubt that your parents would let you. The closest school would be Woodsboros, but they also didn't have a girls team.

The sudden pull of your jacket had you stumbling back. "Ah what the hell!" You turned around taking off your headphones. Only to be faced with your brothers girlfriend.

"Anthony-Oh ew it's you."

"What do you want Sherrie."

"Where's your brother. When you see him tell him to call me."

"What's the number, 1-800-BIYATCH." You laughed to yourself.

"Whatever. Just tell him."

You laughed as she walked away and went into the house.

*

"Wait what do you mean you're leaving?" Your eyes followed your twin brother (although you didn't really look that much the same, there was similarities but you were a bit taller then he was. And the much better looking twin) he was moving back and forth from his bag and his closet.

"The band got booked to perform in fucking London. Can you believe that?"

"London?  As in London England? Wait, what about school. Don't you start next week?" You were sat on his bed strumming his acoustic guitar.

"Oh right, I wanted to ask if you can cover for me. You know, use that mom voice of yours and I don't know  make a call or something." He closed his bag and packed one of his many guitars. Once he was finished he looked at you with a smile.

"Wait, what about mom and dad?"

"One of the ups of having divorced parents. Mom thinks I'm with dad. Dad thinks I'm with mom. And they both hate each other too much to call each other." Throwing two of his bags out window, followed by his guitar.

"And what about your girlfriend? I don't even know why you date her."

"Cause she's hot, it's a guy thing. Well, I'll see you in like two months, maybe more." Anthony smiled and left through the window.

"Anthony!"

"Oh were you talking with your brother?" The sudden voice of your mother startled you.

"Uh yea, on the phone. What the hell is that?" You used the horrendous dress that your mom was carrying as a way out. If clearly worked when your mom beamed down at you.

"It's your dress. For the-Ugh mom." You groaned, knowing what she was going to go on about. "I said I'm not doing it. There's no way I'm putting on a dress. Literally the last time I wore one was when I was two. I'm not doing it." Standing up and putting your brother's guitar away.

"I don't know even know why I keep trying." She said as she walked away. You rolled your eyes and stood up. Looking into the mirror. Your brothers picture to the side. You picked it up and held it up. You never understood how you were related to him. Let alone a twin. You truly never looked alike. You were a bit taller than he was. And honestly stronger as well.

"Well if you can't beat them. Join them."

**

"Ha. You're funny." The hairdresser laughed. Kirby shook her head as she continued to cut her clients hair. Looking back at you, only to stop laughing. "Oh you're not kidding. Wait you're serious."

"Yea come on Kirb, I have a point to make. And I can't do it if you don't help me. Quinn, Anika back me up." You looked back at your best friends.

"Yea come on Kirby. The coach and the whole school in general think that girls can't do half of the things boys can do. They kept the stupid boys team and they don't even win!" Quinn spoke, she was still heated on the matter. Although she didn't have the same dreams as you, she still wanted to support you.

"Yea Kirby, they even got new uniforms and lockers for the boys team. A losing team might I add again." Anika voiced from your side.

"Come on Kirby please." The three of you spoke simultaneously.

The elderly client butting in. "Yea come on Kirby."

With a laugh Kirby laughed and nodded. "Fine."

*

"Damn. You make one fine ass man." Quinn whistled when you stepped out. You so badly wanted to scratch your head. The wig was something you'd have to get used to.

"Shut up. Do I really look like a man?"

"Yea one hot ass man." Anika joked as she stood next to you, reaching up to fix your wig. Quinn laughed from her seat as she ate her popcorn.

"Okay. Now we got the walk. The talk. Tomorrow you start. Remember be confident. You got this. We got all the paper work ready, oh and also. Remember to respond to the name Anthony. Anika literally tried to get your attention using your brothers name, and you didn't listen. Cause you have to get used to it." Kirby said as she got some of the popcorn from Quinn.

"Okay. I got this. I got this."

**

"I don't got this. Take me back. This was a stupid idea. Don't you ever let me come up with any more ridiculous ideas ever again. I can't believe you actually listened to me. You never listen. I can't believe I came this far. Well it's far enough. Take me back-Y/n stop!"

"Relax. You got this, now suck it up and get your shit together." Kirby handed you your bags and pushed you towards the entrance of the school.

You gulped and took a deep breath in trying to calm your nerves. With a look of encouragement from Kirby you made your way into the school.

*

Going into the boy side of the dorm rooms had been everything you expected and more. It was literally your worst nightmare come to life. The smell alone was enough for you to want to turn on your heels and leave. A mixture of body odor and a tone of axe spray. But you had to do this. You now had a point to make and you were going to make it.

You've never moved so fast to make it to your dorm. Slamming the door shut once, the relief of being in the safety of your room was washed away when you felt eyes on you. You were quick to straighten up and eyes wide as you looked at the three boys.

Clearing your throat, remembering to deepen your voice. "What up. Y'all must be my roommates." Nervously fumbling with your keys.

"Uh na I'm your roommate Chad. This is Ethan and that's Wes. They live next door."

You nodded as you put your bags down. Trying to swallow the anxiety that you felt coming up your throat.

"Yo what's your name?"

You turned around to look who was talking. Wes sat on the window seat playing with a ball.

"Anthony Y/ln, so you play the beautiful game bruhs, bros? Brothers?" You had tried to remember how boys talk but at the moment your mind was going blank.

"Yea, Ethan midfield and Wes plays defense and I'm a striker. What about you?"

"Center Midfield."

You cleared your throat as you got unpacked your bag. Taking out your boots, only remembering the tampons you shoved into the boot when Chad pointed them out.

"Dude why do you have tampons?!"

"Uh. I get really bad nose bleeds?"

After the horrifying and embarrassing display of you shoving a tampon up your nose. You were left with a big sense of regret. As the boys laughed and mocked you.

*

So far it's been alright.

That's a big fat lie. So far it's been hell. Things are horrible. The first try outs were today and man. You'd think it had been your first time playing. You had always thought you were great at soccer. It was a sport you loved. You had played it for the longest time. Now you wouldn't go and say you were horrible but you had a lot to learn. Especially since you made it on to the second string. That had been disappointing.

"Good job boys. Nice work, for the second strings don't feel discouraged. You are just as much on this team as the first stringers. Now go hit the shower. I'll see you guys tomorrow." Coach Loomis spoke before leaving to his office.

Showers?!

Crap! How could I forget about the freaking showers?!

You tried to think of any possible reason why you wouldn't be able to. You'd didn't really want to see anyone naked. Let alone a bunch of immature boys. But the closer you got to the boys locker the more you were starting to panic.

"Y/LN! Principal Riley wants to talk to you. So get a move on." Coach yelled from his office.

You had never felt so much relief like you did this moment. Never moving  so fast to get out of a room before.

*

The talk with the principal had been one of the weirdest and most awkward talks you had ever been in. As you walked out of the office you felt your body collide with a smaller body.

"Oh my god I'm so sorry. Are you alright?" The sudden action causing your voice to come out normal before you could even realize. Moving to help pick up the books the shorter girl dropped.

"It's okay."

You looked up, only for your breath to hitch in your throat. The girl in front of you was so, beautiful. Completely gorgeous. The faint freckles that littered her face, made you want to count every single one. Her dark brown eyes, were so mesmerizing that you could get lost in that pool of dark chocolate. Her small smile had your heart hammering in your chest. The dimples that appeared had to be the cutest things you had ever seen.

"Uh here's your books." You cleared your throat deepening your voice, the smile that she directed your way was enough for you to almost go weak to the knees.

"Thanks. You're the new transfer student, right? I'm Tara."

Tara. What a beautiful name. You returned the smile, "Y/-Uh Anthony. It's nice to meet you Tara." You held out your hand for her to shake, at the sound of her giggle, your smile grew just a tad bit. But the moment her soft, small, warm hand was in yours it was like your hand was made to hold hers. At the sight of her blushing cheeks, you pulled your hand away, clearing your throat.

"Well it was nice to meet ya Tara. I have to go and do some, guy stuff. Uh I'll see you around." With a nod you were quick to walk away. Part of you hoping you'd run into the Tara again.

*

"Dude this is not working. Who knew making friends as a dude could be so hard. Not to mention that I'm starting to smell. Kirby how could I forget about the showers. My roommate is a bit of jackass and-Alright take it easy. I can help you with the making friends situation and the shower problem. Let me just get the girls I've got a plan." Kirby cut you off before hanging up, not giving you a chance to respond.

"Kirby? Hello? Ugh, I hate when she does that." You mumbled. The past two days of being a 'man' have been a little bit harder than you had expected. Your roommates along with his friends are bit of jerks and clearly didn't want to be around you.

It wasn't long till, Kirby showed up with Quinn and Anika. Who had bright smiles on their faces. You hurried to get in the car. "Oh I've miss-oh wow you stink." Quinn cut herself off, pulling away from you.

"Don't remind me. Now what's your plan?"

*

With feeling fresh and clean, you walked into the restaurant with a new found confidence. You knew at least half of the students and soccer team were in the place at the moment. It was great for Kirby's plan, 'Make friends plan'. Her own way of making friends for you was well, "the boy way". That's why she had brought Quinn and Anika.

"Fuck here comes Anthony. Spread out so it looks like we don't got room." Chad nudged Ethan to the side as they spread out in the booth. It wasn't like he hated the guy but since the tampon moment in their room. He wasn't in a rush to make friends with his roommate.

"Oh my god Anthony Y/ln! Oh my god I've missed you so much."

Chad was pulled from his conversation with Ethan to see a red haired girl. She was hot.

"Quinn. Hey baby, how you doing?"

Chad couldn't understand how someone like Anthony could have girl like this one. The guy was weird. He acted completely strange. But here he was with this hot girl. Eyes widening a bit when the girl lightly kissed Anthony on the lips before leaving. He heard Ethan chocking on his soda when yet another girl, just as hot, called out to Anthony. The way this dark haired girl refused to let him go. Only leaving when Anthony slapped her butt.

"What the fuck? Did those two just talk to Anthony? Him?" Wes spoke in pure disbelief. There was no way. Seeing a hot brunette coming his way. He took his chance. "Hey there pretty lady."

"Ew. Are you talking to me?"

"I was just- Yea sure let me make it clear, girls with asses like mine don't talk to boys with faces like yours."

The two teammates shared a look, trying to hold in their laughter at the face Wes was making. The one of pure embarrassment.

"I'm looking for my boyfriend Anthony Y/ln."

The three boys jaw dropped in disbelief.

*

"Fuck it's your brothers girlfriend. Don't let her get too close or she'll recognize you." Kirby had spoken so quickly you barely had time to understand before you heard Sherries obnoxiously loud voice.

"Wait what?"

"Anthony!"

"Oh fuck uh be gone you craziest-" You felt a small sense of fear as you tried to dodge Sherries attempts to get to you. You had gone as far as using a stack of pizza boxes to cover your face. "Can't you take a hint. If I don't answer your phone calls or your texts. It could only mean one thing. We are done!"

Sherrie had acted like you expected. Leaving with scream of anger and most likely embarrassment. You were relieved on the other hand. Your cover was not blown. You heard the cheers and even felt the acceptance of your schoolmates.

"Dude that was awesome."

"You're officially my idol."

"Make room for the man."

*

Like Kirby had predicted. The plan had worked. You had the "respect" of your teammates and the school. Although you kinda felt a little bad for Sherrie. Even though she's been nothing but a bitch to you. You also didn't stink that was good. You had gotten used waking up super early in the morning. Getting the showers to yourself.

"Hey Anthony."

You turned at the sound of your brothers name. That was also something you kinda got used to. Being addressed as your brothers name and not yours.

At seeing who called for you, it had you smiling in a way you couldn't really control. "Tara hey. How are you doing?" You faced the shorter girl. She returned the smile as she looked up at you.

"I've been good. I haven't seen you around the past week. How's the school treating you." Tara had tried to see Anthony around the campus. But the campus was huge. She hasn't even got a glimpse of Anthony which was extremely disappointing.

"Oh it's been something else. I like the campus though." You looked down to what she was holding and it was stack of what you could clearly tell were heavy books. You reached for them without really realizing that you were. "Let me help you with those." You didn't really give her a chance to decline before taking most of the books.

"Thank you. But you didn't have to." Tara could feel the warmth coming from her cheeks. She could only hope that Anthony couldn't notice.

"It's okay, now what are you even studying that requires you to carry so many books." At sound of her laugh you smiled, her laugh was so sweet.

"Oh I've been transferred out of my class into another. Apparently I was too smart for that class."

"Nice, a smart girl." You teased smiling in satisfaction when you saw her blush. "No but seriously, aren't you running for class president?"

"Yes, I'm been elected to run. It's nothing." She looked away from his gaze. Her own mother had been dismissive of her achievements. She hated the feeling of being a disappointment. She's tried not to let her mother's words affect her but, it's her mother. The harsh words are bound to have an affect.

"Are you kidding? That's great, you were elected, which that alone is awesome. Don't sell yourself short. But don't worry future Ms.President. You have my vote." The smile you got in return was something you'd cherish. You hated how sad she had looked for a just a second before the look was gone.

"Thank you. That means a lot. Well this is me." Never had she felt so disappointed to arrive to her class. She had wanted to keep talking to Anthony. The way he acted around her was in a way no other boy has. He didn't treat her like she was just a piece of meat, like she was just some type of trophy he could show off to his friends. He was different from the other boys in school. "I'll see you later?" Hoping her voice didn't come off as hopeful.

"Of course. Later Ms.Future President." With a small bow you handed her books and walked away. Smiling when you heard her laugh.

*

Arriving into your biology class was something you weren't looking forward to. You hated cutting open any animals or anything that was once alive. Taking a seat as your roommate and his friends took a seat in front of you. The boys becoming your friends was also something new. Ever since that day at the pizza place your popularity had grown.

"Dude I keep forgetting to ask. But how long did you date that girl?" Chad asked as he took a seat in front of his roommate.

"Too long-Alright pick a name out of the bowl and who ever you have will be your lab partner for the rest of the year."

Taking one of the pieces of paper from the bowl you unfolded it. Smiling at the sight of the name. "Tara Carpenter." You looked up, searching for your brun-the brunette that was becoming your favorite. Eyes connecting with the beautiful chocolate eyes. Oh how you loved chocolate. Seeing the smile on her face as she looked at you. Sending a small wave.

"Dude you know Tara Carpenter? Switch with me." Chad couldn't help the small sense of jealousy at the way the girl he liked was looking at Anthony.

"Yea and no cause I said her name out loud." You gathered your things and moved to table Tara had moved to. Placing your bag on the table as you sat down. Leaning forward just bit.

"Hey Tara. I gotta be completely honest with you. The whole dissecting thing freaks me out, so I think you're gonna have to take the reins on this one." You whispered to her. Hoping no one else heard you.

"Wow I don't think any other guy would have admitted to that."

"Crap, you're right." Your eyes widen as you looked down at the paper with a cut open frog. The feeling of wanting to barf came strong.

"No no. It's okay. I got you. I'll take the lead." Tara wanted to wipe the frown on his face. It was such an adorable look but she also wanted to comfort him, so she reached for his hands, taking his hand into hers. His hands were so soft. Not like any other boy's hands she's touched. The warmth and softness of his hands made her want to hold on to them longer.

"Uh no papers from other classes on the table." A boy you e never seen before said, paper was pushed in between in your face and Tara's. Seeing the color of the paper. You quickly tried to grab it but Tara was quicker.

"Oh what's this poems?"

"Lyrics. They're hi-my my old stuff."

"You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be. And I don't wanna go home right now."

You sighed in relief, realizing it was a song you wrote for your brother to sing. He wanted a romantic song and your were such a sucker for them.

"This is really good."

The way she was looking at you had your throat in a knot. Feeling like she could read your mind by the way she was staring intensely into your eyes.

*

As you walked out of the classroom you were pulled by the back of your shirt. "Dude what the fuck Chad!" Pulling your shirt from his grip.

"Anthony my guy. Did you tell her anything about me?"

"Who Tara? Was I supposed to?"

"Come on man. You could convince her to go out with me."

He looked so serious you couldn't help but laugh. "Dude you've been going to school together for, how long? I don't think she likes y-Come on! If you help me. I'll help you train to make first string for the rivalry game."

"Wait what? Seriously?" You were good, but apparently not good enough to make first string. And you had something to prove. You couldn't be distracted by anything. Not even a pretty brunette. It wasn't like Tara liked you.

"Okay, I'll tell her all about Chad Minks and how he's a great dude. But I won't force her."

"You're the man Anthony!" Chad cheered, this was going to work. He knew as much. He just needed someone to sweet talk him up to Tara. Then he would be the hottest guy dating the hottest girl in the school.

*

Training with Chad was fun. The more you trained with him. The more if felt like you were getting better than before. The love you had for game had always been big. Always trying to improve your self in how you play. With Chad's help you were a whole lot prepared and skilled during practices.

As for helping with Tara. It was coming along. Well the best it could without sounding pushy about the situation.

"So when can you let me read the rest of that poem?"

You were brought out of your thoughts at the sound of Tara's voice. You tried to avoid the frog that was cut open in front of you.

"Poem? What poem?" You teased, smiling when she squinted her eyes at you.

"Ugh you suck. I'm going to get you to read it to me one day. You just watch."

"Now, I heard from your friend Amber that you like someone."

"What?" Tara felt her eyes widen. She was going to kick Amber's ass when she sees her. Amber wouldn't tell him, that she liked him right? The feeling of her heart racing as she watched Anthony write down some notes before looking right at her with those soft y/ec eyes.

"Yea, is it by any chance Chad Minks? Cause I've seen what the way he looks at you. I mean I can see it."

Seeing the disbelief and was that disgust? You weren't sure. Reading people wasn't something you were really good at.

"Chad?"

"Yea."

"No."

"Yea."

"No! I mean he's good looking and all but he's just not the guy for me." Tara had tried to like Chad. He was what most girls wanted at the school. But every time she looked at him, she felt nothing. Chad was just like every other jock that has tried to get into her pants. Only wanting her for her body. She had seen how Chad was with Liv. Liv had been so in love with Chad. But the moment Chad got bored he left Liv. Liv had been left heart broken. Tara had gotten used to blocking out any guy that had tried to hit on her. Most of the guys (if not all of them) had always succeeded in making her extremely uncomfortable.

"Hmm I don't know maybe there's more to him than you think there is." You hated yourself for even bringing it up, you could tell this conversation was annoying Tara.

"So he's not just another dumb jock, who wants to get in my pants. So he could tell his friends but is too-Insecure to treat you as an equal?" You understood how she felt. It wasn't long you were also dating a dumb jock.

Tara looked at the taller boy in shock. Never had she met someone, let alone a boy, understand what she had felt. Seeing him agree had honestly left her feeling baffled.

"You know you are the first guy at this school who hasn't tried anything with me."

You felt you cheeks heat up as you cleared your throat, "Oh uh I'm not really looking for another relationship. Just got out of one that was a bit, hard I guess? You're a great friend Tara. You're actually the only person in this school I feel comfortable around."

Even if she felt a bit more that just disappointed that he only saw her as a friend. She offered him a smile. "I feel the same way about you." Her vocie coming out softer than usual. Looking into those beautiful y/ec eyes. It was enough for her to get lost in them. Even if he only saw her as a friend. She could work with that.

"Good, and just take my advice. Chad's a pretty cool dude, get to know the guy."

"I'll consider it." She was most certainly not going to. She watched as the soccer player tried to focus back on the task at hand. The cut open frog they still had to be dissected. The cute grossed out facial expression on his face was too cute for her to ignore.

"So what's that exactly?"

"Uh I think that's the spleen." A small noise of acknowledgment was all she got in response before she saw Anthony fainting and falling to his side. With a chocked laugh she was quick to check on him.

*

"I honestly thought you were joking about the dissecting thing freaking you out this bad." Tara couldn't hold back her giggles as he finally woke up. She had been worried at first. But the more she remembered the face the soccer player made, the more she couldn't help but to laugh.

"Ugh." You sat up, realizing you were now in the nurses room. You felt a little warm inside to see that Tara was sitting next your bed. Wondering if she was sitting there while you were out cold.

"How are you feeling? Down to dissect more frogs?" This time Tara couldn't help the full belly laugh.

As much as you tried to keep a straight face, a smile made its way to your face. You really liked the sound of her laugh. Her smile, the dimples you liked so much being on display. "You're so mean."

Tara brought up her hand to cover her mouth. Trying to control her laughter. "I'm sorry."

She looked utterly beautiful. The sun coming from the window shined on her like if she were an angel. All you wanted was to kis-Uh oh. No. No you couldn't be falling in love with Tara.

You couldn't.

*

"Yo! You okay? I can't believe you passed out over a cut open frog." The laugh that followed was nothing like Tara's.

"Yea whatever. But I've got you half way. She's considered going out with you." You flopped on your bed, looking up at the ceiling. Falling in love was not part of this plan. You couldn't for many reasons. One being the most obvious, YOU WERE A GIRL! For starters. You were a girl pretending to a boy, pretending to be your brother. Tara was obviously straight. And if you did show any signs of liking her, it would be misleading. You were a girl.

Tara was straight.

"Wait really? So should I go ask her out?"

"What? No!" Trying to ignore the jealousy you felt coursing through your body. "You don't want to freak her out."

"Ugh I hate the waiting game. I've been waiting for the past years. Since 6th grade. That’s five whole years. You have no idea how long I've wanted to, to date her. She's the hottest girl in the school."

You narrowed your eyebrows at your roommate. You won't deny that Chad is a great soccer player. He was outstanding on the field. And he was nice enough to help you out to make first string. But other than that you weren't really sure why he was so eager to be with someone who clearly didn't like him back.

*

"Wait what do you mean? You think he doesn't like you?"

Tara groaned into her pillow. As much as she enjoyed being with the taller soccer player. She couldn't ignore the small little voice in her head telling her that Anthony didn't like her back.

"I don't know Amber. He's not like any other boy I've ever met before. He hasn't even flirted with me. Not even once!" She chose to ignore the laugh coming from her best friend.

"What? There's no way. Every guy here has flirted with you at least once." Amber has watched for the past days how this guy had her best friend hooked with just his presence. She won't deny the guy was kinda good looking. But there was something about Anthony that was making her sexually confused? Amber was a proud lesbian. There was no denying that, but she had gone soooo long without finding any boy attractive. Not even when she was little. But now Anthony Y/Ln was a first. Now she didn't like him in that way like Tara did. But there was something about him that was familiar. She just couldn't seem to know what.

"Wait really?" Come to think about it, Amber has not seen Anthony flirt with any girl at all. Every time she saw him he it was always either during class (which he did really pay attention to) and then during the soccer practices. "Wait you don't think he's gay do you?"

That thought had never even crossed her mind. The thought of Anthony being gay had her sitting up straight to face Amber.

"What? No! There's no way-I mean, I don't know. Oh my god let it be me to fall for a guy who could possibly be gay." She groaned even louder as she covered her face with her hands. If Anthony was gay, she would have to move on. Or she could just ask. He did have those two girls at the pizza parlor. Not to mention that crazy ex. But if that were the case. Maybe he's bisexual. Or just now gave up on the girls and just wants boys now.

Ugh. It was just her luck.

*

"What's up Anthony."

You looked away from your open book. You had finally gotten away from Chad and his friends. A moment of peace away from those boys was what you desperately needed. They were rowdy and fun but you could only take so much before you wanted to pull your hair out.

"Sup Amber. How's it going?" Amber was Tara's best friend. You liked Amber. She was always putting Chad in his place when he tried to flirt with Tara. It was always a funny sight.

"Eh it's going but I gotta ask you something." She moved to sit next to Anthony.

You closed your book and looked at the shorter girl. "Sure what's up." You moved to grab your water bottle to take sip.

"Are you gay?"

The water burned as it went up your nose, you spluttered out wet coughs as you tried get your breathing back to normal. You took the napkins Amber offered you. "Jesus Amber. No I am not gay." Well you were. And as funny as it would be for these students to believe your brother Anthony was gay, you weren’t that mean of a sister.

"Really? Not even a little bit?" Amber did not feel convinced for the weirdest reason. She just couldn't put a finger on it.

"No not even a little bit. Why?" You let out a chuckle once you had your breathing under control and you were no longer chocking. Gay?

"Well can you blame a girl for asking." So he wasn't gay, Tara did have a chance. Amber couldn't help but to feel excitement. Mingling is something she was great at.

*

You hated being here, carnivals. Absolutely hated them. Clowns were literally your worst nightmare and those things were everywhere. Not only did you hate clowns. But you absolutely hated that you had to change from being you to your brother. So you opted to just staying as you for the remainder of the day.

"Wait they thought Anthony was gay?" Anika asked again once she was finished laughing.

"Anthony gay? Girl he is as straight as they come." Quinn laughed as well, the girls along with Kirby had arrived at carnival before you did. You mom had called the moment you arrived and said you were signed up for the kissing booth. Part of you had never felt so offended and angry. You were not going to be kissing no strangers. No matter the cause before hanging up.

"Any cute girls there?" Kirby nudged your shoulder as you walked around. Noticing the blush on her younger friend. "Oh so there is. What's her name?"

"Stop. There's no-Liar! Come on. Tell us." Your two best friend nudged and pleaded to know. You rolled your eyes although you were smiling.

"There is on-" You were cut off by someone bumping into your body. You were able to catch them before they fell. "Oh I'm sorry."

At the sound of the voice, the voice that sounded awfully familiar! Tara furrowed her eyebrows before looking up at the person. Only for her eyes to widen in shock. The girl standing in front of her looked exactly like Anthony. Almost like a spitting image. "Do I know you?" She couldn't help up to ask.

"Uh no. I don't think so. Sorry." You moved to walk around Tara. As much as you wanted to talk to her as you and not Anthony. You couldn't, not without blowing your cover. You were quick (but not too quick to make it weird) away.

Kirby and the girls were quick to follow you. Noticing Anika sharing a long stare with one of the girls. "Oh my god was that her!" Speaking once she was far away from the short girl.

"Would you shut up, and yes that's her." Your cheeks flushing at the teasing grins that were looking your way.

"Dude she's cute!" Quinn shook your shoulders in pure excitement.

"You should totally try to get w-No, she's straight. And I don't know if you know this but I'm a girl." You shook her head, continuing your walk only to see Chad and Frankie fighting. You were quick to run to the scuffle. Trying your best to pull the two dude's away from each other.

"Frankie stop!"

Chad turned around at the voice, opening his mouth to say something he had been momentarily distracted enough for Frankie to hit him. Making Chad stumble into you. You caught him right when the security showed up. Quinn and Anika pulling you away before you could get in trouble.

"Hey are you okay?"

You were standing to the side, after being yelled at by your mom. It wasn't even your fault but you let her yell at you. The girls had gone to get food while you waited. The sound of Tara's voice you looked towards her. She offering such cute shy smile.

"Uh yea I'm okay. Thanks for asking." You murmured, you weren't sure why you felt so shy now. Maybe it because you weren't sure if Tara would like you as Y/n and not as Anthony.

"Are you related to Anthony Y/Ln by any chance?"

"Yea he's my twin brother."

"Wow you guys are crazy alike. It's almost uncanny. How do you know Chad?" Tara couldn't get over how you looked so much like Anthony. Ever since she bumped into you earlier that day. She couldn't stop thinking about you and Anthony. She had always been comfortable with her sexuality. She had always said she was bisexual. And right now was a good example why. Anthony. He was so charming, so sweet and just so funny. Honest. You. You were honestly the most beautiful woman she's ever seen.

"Yea we get that a lot. I'm Y/n." Sticking out your hand for her to shake.

"Tara." Tara took your out stretched hand. Your hand taking hers in a gente but soft shake. She looked down at your hand, it was awfully the same as Anthony. Down to the same softness that she has grown to like.

"Damn that guy who beat up Frankie was kinda hot, wasn't that your brothers roommate." Quinn asked as she wrapped her arms around yours, interrupting whatever was happening between you and the short girl. From the corner of her she was able to see the same girl that had bumped into you looking right at you. Maybe that girl wasn't as straight as she seemed. "Hi I'm Quinn."

"Nice to meet you. I should go back to my friends. It was nice meeting you Y/n." She couldn't stop looking at you, she hoped that it wouldn't be the last time she saw you. A past of her also feeling a bit of disappointment seeing the red head being so close to you.

*

"Dude, what? What's on your face." You spluttered with your words at seeing the tampon up Chad's nose. Part of you wanted to laugh.

"Oh this? Yeah I grabbed one of your." He pointed to the tampon as he got up. "And they actually work." He took the bloody tampon out and threw it away.

"Dude what happened?"

"Well turns out the dude I fought was your sister's ex. And man she looks just like you. It's kinda scary. I mean I have a twin but we don't look that alike. She's kinda hot. Is she single?"

"Eh we get that all the time. And yea she is but she's gay."

Chad's shoulder visibly deflated. "Damn."

"I thought you liked Tara?" You narrowed your eyes slightly. Hoping it wasn't noticeable.

"I do. But I can admire another woman. And your sister is hot. Can't believe she dated a douche bag like Frankie." He didn't even do anything to the guy and Frankie had just lost his cool. And Chad wasn't one to back down.

"Yea, everyone gots at least one person they regret dating." You laid on your bed. Remembering how Tara finally met you as your true self.

*

"Hi Anthony." You looked away from your homework to see Tara sitting down in front of you. You were once again in the library.

"Hey Tara. How was the carnival yesterday?" You closed your book, focusing on the way Tara was looking at you. She had the same look of when she was studying something. In this case she was studying you. Which was making you quite nervous. "You okay tar?"

Seeming to be snapped back to reality. Tara nodded, "Yea sorry. It was fun. Why weren't you there?"

Shrugging in response, "Crazy ex showed up and wouldn't leave me alone so I just ended up leaving."

"Mmh, I didn't know you were a twin." Tara couldn't get over how much Anthony and his sister looked alike. It was truly uncanny. It was like she was looking at a man version of the girl she saw at the carnival.

"Oh you met Y/n? How was that?" You wanted to know what she thought of you.

"She was sweet. We didn't talk long, her girlfriend showed up."

"Girlfriend?"

"Yea this pretty red head."

You let out a laugh. She thought you were dating Quinn. You love Quinn she was one of your best friends. "Oh you mean Quinn. No that's just my sisters best friend."

Having a weird sense of relief, she wasn't even sure why. She had just met you. Why did she feel jealous. She had no reason to feel this type of jealousy. "Oh. They just seemed close."

"They've been friends since they were in diapers. They've just had a close bond since like forever."

"That's sweet..Wait didn't you kiss the red head?!" The memory had been shoved right to the front of her brain.

"Oh...yea. Uh.." Think faster!! "That was more of a friendly kiss? Quinn was just trying to help me break up with my girlfriend at the time. Sherrie was-is crazy. She was also kinda of a bitch to Y/n."

At the mention of that girl being mean to Y/n. It had her feeling, protective? You had looked so nice. Your soft y/ec eyes held some type of warmth. She wanted nothing more than to talk to you again.

*

"Y/LN!" You jumped up from the leg press machine. You had been working out with Chad for the past hour. The game against your school was less than a week away. And you have been training hard. The practices have been a lot more easier now that you knew how to play like a man. Chad had been a great help.

"Yes coach?"

A jersey being thrown at you. You looked down at the jersey. Your last name stitched on the back of the jersey along with a big number name below it. You felt your eyes widen in shock and excitement.

"You're first string for the rivalry game."

"Really?"

"No I was joking, you idiot." Coach Loomis said sarcastically before walking away.

You couldn't contain your excitement. Jumping up and down. "Yes!" Chad laughed as he shook his head.

"Congratulations man."

*

"Oh I know. Ask out Chad, like in a friend date. But don't let him know that, do it in front of Anthony. See how he reacts." Amber looked at Chad and Anthony from across the gym.

"But I don't like Chad."

"Which is why it will be a friend date. But you'll tell him that on the date."

Tara debated the plan. She really liked Anthony. His personality, his attitude, the way he was around her. It was so refreshing. So pure.

"Okay."

*

You couldn't stop smiling. All your hard work was finally paying off. Your point that you were trying to make was almost done. Wanting finish your workout before calling the girls.

"Hey Chad."

You both looked up to see Tara in all her glory standing there. Looking at Chad.

"Tara! Hi."

You could tell that he was nervous. With a quick look from Tara. You sent her an awkward thin lipped smile. Hoping Tara couldn't tell how jealous and dejected as you seemed.

"How about we go out on Friday."

But she did. She could see how the happy glint in his eyes faded as soon as she mentioned the date. She watched as Anthony turned around fiddling with his phone.

"Really?! I uh mean. Cool. Yea cool I'll see you Friday."

*

You hated yourself for feeling so jealous. You hated it. You had no right to feel jealous. Tara was straight and clearly giving Chad a chance. You had to focus on the bigger picture. So you tired to do that.

Staying late at the gym before the big game tomorrow. You didn't know how long you were until you saw the time. Figuring you needed some good nights rest before the game tomorrow. With a quick shower, you made your way back to your dorm room.

You had expected for Chad to be home so quickly. You were sure he would still be out with Tara.

"So are you gonna tell me the truth?"

The truth? You looked at Chad wide eyed. Did he know that you weren't a boy. You were sure you had been good at hiding your true self. Maybe your wig had fallen off while you were sleeping.

"Uh truth?"

"Yes the fucking truth."

He seemed angry, well you assumed he had a right to. Maybe he felt a little weirded out that girl has been rooming with him for a while.

"Okay, I'll tell you the truth. But just know that I did this cause I had to prove something. I've always loved soccer and-What so you use me to get better at soccer and then what steal my girl."

You were confused now. What on earth was Chad talking about? "Wait what? What are you talking about?"

"Dude stop lying I saw you!" Chad knew he may have been overacting. First he was a bit mad and disappointed that the date hadn't gone as he had hoped. The date had been so awkward and he had just felt so uncomfortable, and top off the date Tara had told him she didn't like him in that way. When he had seen Anthony, his so called friend kissing Tara. He had felt so betrayed and extremely jealous.

"Saw me do what?"

With his anger at an all time high. He had pushed Anthony out of the room without any further explanation. Slamming the door in Anthony's face.

"What the fuck?" You were left confused. With no where else to sleep you walked away towards the library. Hoping that it was open.

*

"Yo Anthony! What are you doing here?!" Jumping up from the chairs you had pushed together in a form of makeshift bed. "The game is about to start."

This had you almost tripping over your own two feet as you ran out of the library towards the boys locker room. Confusion taking over as you saw your uniform was gone. Fumbling with your phone hoping to find some answers.

Tony: thanks for unpacking my things and making my room. You're the best sis

Tony: why did you sneak tampons in my drawer. Jerk

"Fuck."

**

You could only watch from the safety of hiding under the bleachers as your brother destroyed all your hard work. He truly was a horrible athlete. It was like watching a baby trying to walk. If anything a baby could probably play better.

Sighing in relief as the whistle blew out signaling the ending of the first half. Watching as the coach Loomis spoke to your brother. Banging your head on the metal. Your brother walked past the bleachers and you took this opportunity to yank him under the bleachers.

"What the fu-Y/n?"

"Dude what the hell are you doing?" You punched his arm, he was supposed to give you a heads up before coming back.

"Ow! Me? Why are you dressed like me?"

"Ugh I was trying to prove to our old school that a girl could be just as good as any boy on the damn team. Can you believe they cut the girls soccer team and not the boys?"

"Wait what? But the girls team win more games?" He knew how much you love the game. There was never a game he would miss when you played.

"Wait, what are you even doing here?"

"Oh!" Remembering what had happened last night. "There was this girl. She kissed me. And even though it was only a second cause when she pulled away from me and looked at me like I was stranger. But I came to look for her cause she was hot."

"That's what Chad was talking about." You mumbled to yourself. "Give me back my uniform. And stay hidden.”

*

“Wait what do you mean you kissed him?” Amber asked as she looked away from the game. Half time had just started and it looked like Anthony was being given another chance. She had never seen someone play so horribly. It was almost laughable.

“Yea I did.”

“Then why do you sound disappointed? Shouldn’t you be happy, you have been crushing on the guy for a while now.” She looked back at the match. The second half time hasn’t started yet.

“I don’t know. I felt nothing. He usually makes me feel so much but last night, it felt weird like I was kissing a stranger. His lips weren’t as soft as they looked.” She didn’t really remember seeing his lips last night. But she remembered seeing those lips everyday. They had always looked so soft so kissable. The lips she kissed last night were not soft.

“Well I’ve seen him practice and he looked great during practice. The way he was playing in the first half, it might as well have been a stranger.” Mindy spoke up from her spot. There was no way Anthony was playing like newbie when he had trained so hard to make first string.

Quinn, Kirby and Anika shared a look. They were sitting behind the three girls. Maybe the short girl wasn’t as straight as they had assumed.

*

The second half was going a whole lot better than the first half. With you scoring the first goal with the help of Ethan. The stadium bursting out in cheers. The score now being 1-0.

You could still fell the hostility coming from Chad. He refused to look at you, going as far as to not even passing you the ball. This caused him to lose the ball. Leading your old school to score. Tying the game.

“Dude come on I know you’re mad but let’s put that aside for the next forty minutes.” You made the mistake of placing your hand on his shoulder. This caused him to push you away.

“Get your hands off me.”

“Chad come on-” you were pushed again before Ethan and Wes held him back.

“Do you two little princesses have to step off or something?” Hearing your ex’s voice was not what you needed. Hearing his obnoxious laughter along with his teammates was almost ruining the happiness you felt. “Do you ne—Y/n?!”

You didn’t want to look at him. Cause now you were for sure made. The dream you had of proving yourself was burning down. With a heavy sigh you turned around. Seeing Frankie’s eyes widen in shock. Knowing the act was over. You took off your wig. Hearing gasps from literally everyone.

“You’re a girl?!” Chad asked no longer angry. He couldn’t believe he just physically pushed a girl. And his push hadn’t been gentle.

“Yea sorry about the lying, I had a point to prove.” You moved your gaze towards your coach. He had his arms crossed.

Hearing the laughter coming from Frankie and his teammates, even his coach had laughed. “You can’t play with a girl. It says in the rule book.” The coach said smugly. This was when coach Loomis stepped up. Taking the book from the other coach.

“What rule book? Here in Woodboro we don’t discriminate. Based on gender.” Coach pointed his finger at the other coach’s chest. And you knew it hurt based on how the other coach stumbled back and how rubbed the spot.

“Alright then. You think you can beat us with a girl on your team. Good luck. You’re gonna need it.”

With a wink being shot your way by Coach Loomis you smiled excitedly. You couldn’t believe he was going to let you play. You quickly put your hair up in a ponytail so it wouldn’t be in your face. You were now more confident more comfortable.

*

Winning the game had been everything and more. The way Frankie had run off crying was so funny, extremely hilarious actually. You had been told off by your parents like you had expected but you could tell they were proud. Especially your dad.

You also watched as Chad was being down talked by your brother. Probably telling Chad off for pushing you earlier.

“All this time you were Y/n?” You turned around to see Tara standing there. She had not looked mad or anything. It was more a of curiosity.

“Yes. I’m sorry. I know it was misleading and wrong. For that I’m sorry.” You fiddled with your fingers. Upon hearing laugh you looked up towards her. Her smile brighter than before.

“Are you kidding? If anything I need glasses. Cause wow. Also sorry for kissing yesterday. Kinda thought you were her.” Anthony walked back to his sister and the hot girl, although a bit dejected he was happy you were happy. He had never seen you so happy yet nervous at the same time. By the way Tara was looking at you. He knew she felt the same way. With a dismissive wave he smiled and walked away.

“So? You’re not mad?”

With a shake of her head, she took your hand in hers. “A little bit, but that’s because I was so sexually confused, then you came along and I’ve never been so confused. Now I’m just hoping you feel the same.”

With the smile of your own you grinned back. “I’ve never felt so sure Ms.President.”

With a giggle of her own she wrapped her arms around your neck and brought you down for a long awaited kiss. Now these lips were soft. These were the lips she had been dreaming about. The feeling that had been absent were now there and going crazy. Just like she had wanted.

“I FUCKING KNEW IT!!” Amber yelled. There had been no way she found a boy attractive. Especially since she had the biggest crush on her best friends sister. But that wasn’t relevant.

:)

[flametrashiraarchive]

No one asked but... I'm trash and it's Muzan Monday!

NSFW Muzan headcanons

NSFW beneath the cut obviously.

Now I know you're thinking "demon daddy is the ultimate top"

And you'd be right 99% of the time.

"I permit your continued existence solely for the purpose of my pleasure."

He fucks you when he's angry, stressed, disappointed...

So, multiple times per day.

The thing is, he can change the shape and size of his body

And that includes his dick.

So some days he's just a normal level of stressed out and just want a nice easy ride, listening to the symphony of your moans.

Wants you nice and wet so he can hear it slapping.

Other days he's beyond pissed and will make his dick huge, cramming it into you and pounding you until you scream.

And let me tell ya, that thing is not always smooth and human-looking.

Ridges... bumps... mouths

Making you cum is a point of pride. Knowing he can elicit a reaction from you with the simplest touch gets him off.

Sometimes he likes to experiment with new ways of bringing about your ruin.

And Muzan has a lot of tricks up his sleeve.

He can exert pressure on objects at will and manipulate vibrations in the air

Which is an ability he'll sometimes use on you.

You'll just be going about your day and feel a sort of tingly pressure down there

And notice Muzan is staring at you with a faint menacing smile

He loves to watch you try to keep your composure as he makes you cum with his mind.

Degrades AND praises.

"Oh, my pretty little slut is such a pathetic, whimpering mess."

"Mm, yes you're pleasing your king well. Such an obedient harlot."

"There isn't a single hole in your in your body I haven't defiled, is there? You belong to me, don't you? Say it."

But sometimes... sometimes...

The burden of command is too much

Muzan will, on occasion, permit you to top him.

"Speak a word of this and it will be the last thing you utter."

There isn't a restraint in the universe that can truly contain him, but he likes when you tie him up

Surrendering control makes him feel vulnerable and that's something he isn't used to feeling anymore. It's a thrill he only allows himself to feel with you.

Expects zero mercy.

Bares his teeth and growls as you fuck him.

Leaves claw marks in the floorboards.

and just milk his cock.

Moo-zan

But he absolutely cannot keep his composure when you go down on him.

Your mouth is his ruin.

The only time you will ever see his face flush is when you lick his tip and maintain eye contact.

Put the tip of your tongue in his slit.

The man's a mess.

His back fully arches and he starts to pant

His voice cracks when he's close

"Nggghhh damn you... m-more... I'm cu-ohhhh fuck fuck ffffuck..."

Likes to read to you afterward while you lay your head in his lap.

Acting all dignified and calm as if he didn't just whimper so loudly he alerted Kokushibo.

Gently twists your hair around his fingertips as you start to fall asleep.

"You belong to me," he says.

He means "I love you."

[doctorbitchcrxft]

Long-Distance Call | Supernatural Series Rewrite | Dean Winchester x Fem!Reader

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Fem!Reader

Warnings: lots of arguing, angst, everyone's saying things they don't mean, canon violence, canon gore

Word Count: 5056

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For hours most nights recently, you watched Dean sleep. In the dim light coming in through the cheap curtains in motel rooms, you would make out the details of his face and trace your eyes along them. He was just so beautiful, and you considered yourself incredibly lucky for every day you got to spend with him; despite the fact that those days were coming to an end. 

Dean knew you hadn’t been sleeping, but you couldn’t bring yourself to tell him why. 

Sam was driving himself crazy talking to witch doctors, professors, and demonologists trying to wrap his head around a way to break Dean’s deal. You didn’t get involved, though; you knew it was futile to do so. 

You weren’t sure if feeling helpless and knowing the situation was helpless was better than feeling helpless and trying to gain control of the situation, but you knew Sam probably felt as horribly as you did. 

“Y’know, someday, if we ever get a house— it could happen!” you assured Dean off his skeptical look. “We should get a couch. It’d be better for our backs than sitting on Baby or these shitty mattresses.”

You sat up facing Dean who lounged on the headboard in your shared motel room. Tension had been high between the brothers recently, and you decided it was best for the three of you to bunk separately. 

“You are annoyingly optimistic, you know that?” he replied. 

“I like to think of myself as more of a realist,” you returned. “But I’m trying to be more like you lately.”

“What do you mean?” Dean asked. His eyes held such an intensity when he looked at you. 

In vulnerable moments like these, you couldn’t bear to look back at him. You opted for looking down at the mattress or, really, anywhere other than his face. “I mean, your whole thing is being annoyingly biting and sarcastic and— I mean, you just have the most amazing sense of humor— even when things suck major ass. And I don’t know how you do it. But… it’s admirable.” When your eyes returned to his face, he was looking at you with such pride and admiration. 

“What?” you asked.

“I just love you,” he said. 

You grinned widely and reached for his hand. You held it for just a moment before speaking again. “When are you gonna tell Sam?”

“What?”

“That we can’t save you.”

He sighed. “(Y/N)—”

“No, Dean, he deserves to know.” You shifted to your knees from your cross-legged position. “He’s on a wild goose chase instead of enjoying the time he has with you.”

“He’s a grown man, he can make his own choices,” Dean insisted, hand retreating from yours. He crossed his arms over his chest.

You gave him a look. “And maybe he’d make different choices if he had all the information about the situation available to him.”

“Alright, professor, no need to lecture me,” he grumbled, getting out of bed.

“Dean—! Don’t get mean just because you’re pissed at yourself and this whole situation,” you said, standing to face him. “Look, I’m only saying something because I don’t want the last few weeks of your life to be spent fighting with your brother.”

“Way to put that in perspective, (Y/N), thank you,” Dean spat. 

“See, this is when your attitude pisses me off beyond belief,” you argued. “I’m trying to have a conversation with you, and you’re being a complete dick. This didn’t have to turn into a fight, and I’m not understanding why it did!”

“Because you’re my girlfriend, not my fucking therapist,” he responded. “I don’t need you to tell me how to live my life.”

“Okay, this clearly isn’t about me.” You shook your head, turning away from him to grab your shorts and shoes. 

“Then, what’s it about, (Y/N)?” 

You turned back to him. “Clearly, this is about your deal.” “Oh, my god,” Dean scoffed.

“You’re runnin’ out of time. You’re scared, and you’re lashing out. It’s crap. I only wanna help you because I love you,” you told him. “And I’m not gonna tolerate you getting mean with me just because I told you something you didn’t wanna hear.”

“Where are you going?” Dean asked, seeing you stomp toward the door. 

“Out,” you replied. “Don’t follow me.”

***

That night, after yet another argument, you convinced Dean to let you sleep in his car and have him take the bed because you knew you wouldn’t get much sleep anyway. You were hurt and angry, but you missed holding Dean. You missed memorizing his features while he slept and finally seeing him at peace. 

And the next morning, the situation was no better. Now, instead of Dean and Sam fighting, it was you, Dean, and Sam fighting. 

Sam had gone to talk to another person about how to potentially break Dean’s deal. “So, the professor doesn't know crap.”

“Shocking,” Dean commented. “Pack your panties, guys, we're hitting the road.”

“What? What's up?” Sam asked. 

“That was Bobby.” He gestured to the phone he’d just hung up. “Some banker guy blew his head off in Ohio, and he thinks there's a spirit involved.”

“So, you two were talking a case?” 

“No, we were actually talking about our feelings. And then our favorite boy bands,” Dean replied dryly. “Yeah, we were talking a case!”

“Dean, stop being an ass,” you scolded. 

“Well, get Sam to stop asking stupid questions.” Sam huffed. “So, a spirit? What?”

“Yeah, the banker was talking about some sort of electrical problems at his pad for like a week. Phone was going haywire, computer was flipping on and off,” Dean explained. “This is not ringing your bell?” He pressed when Sam looked at him skeptically. 

“Well, sure, yeah. But, Dean, we're already on a case,” the younger one replied. 

“Whose?” Dean asked. 

“Yours!”

“Right. Yeah. Well, you coulda fooled me,” the older scoffed. 

“What the hell else have we been doing lately other than trying to break your deal?” Sam protested. 

“Chasing our tails, that's what. Sam, we've talked to every professor, witch, soothsayer and two-bit carny act in the lower forty-eight. Nobody knows squat! And we can't find Bela, we can't find the Colt. So until we actually find something, I'd like to do my job.”

“We should summon Ruby,” Sam suggested. 

“I'm not gonna have this fight with you.” Dean shook his head. 

Sam continued anyway. “She said she knows how to save you.”

“About that, Dean has something he wants to tell you.” You turned to your partner expectantly with your arms folded. 

“What?” Sam asked, looking between the two of you. 

Dean was giving you a glare which you returned. 

“Dean, what?” Sam asked again. 

“She can’t save me,” Dean answered finally, still holding your glare. 

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Sam turn back to you. “(Y/N)—?”

“She told us she can’t save him, Sam,” you admitted. 

Sam turned his anger toward you. “Whoa, so you’ve known this whole time and haven’t told me?” 

“It wasn’t mine to tell, Sam!”

“Yeah, but the both of you still kept a secret from me,” he responded. 

“You really wanna talk about who's keeping secrets from who?” Dean snapped. 

You turned to the car. 

“Where are you going?” Dean called after you. 

“Guess we’re going to Ohio.”

***

You were silent for the entirety of the ride to the deceased’s house. Dean and Sam only spoke to make a snarky remark directed at each other or at you, but you refused to respond. 

You asked the woman what happened to her husband, and she reluctantly told you that he kept talking to a woman named Linda on the phone. However, there was no one on the other line when she would pick it up to check. 

Curious about who this woman could have been, you and the brothers returned to the motel to research. 

“Linda's a babe. Or, was,” Dean commented. 

Your heart dropped. You knew he was kidding, but now was so not the time to make jokes like that. “Don’t say shit like that, please.”

“She’s dead, (Y/N),” he replied dryly. “Don’t be jealous.”

“I just think it’s in really poor taste to say that right now considering the state our relationship’s in,” you told him, trying to remain as calm as possible. 

He slammed his laptop shut. “Are you seriously picking a fight with me over this? Right now?”

Sam interrupted before you could respond. “Oh-kay! That’s enough. Who’s Linda?”

“Linda Bateman.” Dean turned his eyes away from you. “She and Ben Waters were high school sweethearts.”

“So what happened?” Sam asked. 

“Drunk driver hit them head on. Ben walked away.”

“So, what then? Dead flame calls to chat?” Sam wondered aloud.

“You would think, but Linda was cremated. So why's she still floating around?”

“You got me,” Sam shrugged. 

“What about that, uh, caller I.D?” Dean asked his brother, referring to the number he’d found on Ben’s phone. 

“Turns out, it's a phone number,” Sam replied. “It's about a century old, back from when phones had cranks.”

“So, why use that number to reach out and touch someone?” Dean returned. 

“Got me there too, but we should put a trace on it.”

“Well how the hell are we going to put a trace on something that's over one-hundred years old?”

Sam suggested that the three of you should head to Ben’s phone company’s local office posing as representatives of their headquarters. 

“You guys go ahead without me,” you said. 

“Oh, c’mon, (Y/N)—”

You cut Dean off. “No. Both of us need space before we kill each other. So, please. Go.”

“Whatever,” Dean grumbled and stormed out of the room.

Sam stayed behind with you for a moment. “I’m sorry about him,” he said.

You sniffled, wiping away tears that threatened to spill from your eyes. “It’s okay. Just a rough patch, I guess. Call me when y’all have something.”

He nodded and pulled you into a hug. Sam placed a quick kiss on the crown of your head before following his brother out of the door. 

***

Sam called to inform you that the number had called over a dozen people multiple times over the last week. So, you and the Winchesters split up to investigate. Without a car, you stayed in the motel room and called the numbers Sam had forwarded to you posing as a representative of the phone company. One of the people you’d spoken to said that he’d been hearing his deceased brother calling him to reconcile the broken relationship they’d had when his brother passed away. 

Just as you hung up the phone with him, Dean burst into the room and immediately started pacing. 

“What’s wrong?” you asked. 

Dean didn’t answer. 

Sam sat at the table in the room. “He said our dad called him.”

“No fucking way,” you breathed out. “You really think it was him?”

“I don't know, maybe,” Dean grunted. 

“Well, what did he sound like?” Sam asked. 

“Like Oprah!” the older brother snapped. “Like Dad; he sounded like Dad, what do you think?”

“What did he say?” you questioned. 

“My name,” Dean replied. 

“That’s it?” Sam pressed. 

“Call dropped out.”

You shook your head and folded your arms, sitting cross-legged on Sam’s bed. After the recent fights with Dean, you’d decided to get a room separate from the two brothers and had been hanging out in their room all day. “Why would he even call in the first place, Dean?”

“I don't know, (Y/N)! I’m not a fucking psychic,” he snarked. “Why are ghosts calling anybody in this town? But I mean, other people are hearing from their loved ones, why can't we? It's at least a possibility, right?”

You wanted to chew him out for snapping at you like that, but you truly had no energy to put up another fight. 

“Yeah, I guess?” Sam replied in your place. 

“Okay, so what if....” Dean trailed off, only looking at his brother. “What if it really is Dad? What happens if he calls back? What do I say?”

“Hello,” you suggested. 

“Hello?” he scoffed. 

You shook your head and rolled your eyes. 

“That's what you come back with. Hello?” Dean continued. 

“Fuck off, Dean,” you sneered. 

Dean huffed, grabbed his jacket, and headed for the door. 

Sam shot you a puppy-dog-eyed look and turned to the door to stare after his brother. 

You sighed and buried your face in your hands. 

“(Y/N)?” 

You picked your head up. 

“What’s happening to you guys?”

“I don’t know,” you admitted, tearing up. “We started fighting ‘cause I told him to tell you about the whole ‘Ruby’ thing, and I said some mean shit, and he said some mean shit, and it’s just a mess now.”

Sam gave you another puppy-dog-eyed look. 

“It’ll be fine, though. I’m sure it’ll blow over.”

If it was even possible, Sam’s face dropped even further. 

“Don’t look at me like that,” you smiled lopsidedly, knowing he just didn’t know how to help. “Can we talk about something other than my boy drama?”

Sam nodded. “Sure.” 

***

For the next few hours, you scoured the internet for information on the “SHA33” number that was calling these poor people. 

Dean returned with caustic remarks to spare. “Find anything?” he asked Sam while pretty much blatantly ignoring you. 

“After three hours, I’ve found no reason why anything supernatural would be going on here,” Sam sighed, shutting his laptop. 

“Me neither, Dean, thanks for asking,” you said. 

“Well, you know, you think a Stanford education and a high school hook up rate of zero-point-zero would produce better results than that,” Dean scoffed at Sam.

“Hilarious,” you deadpanned, hoping to elicit some sort of a response from Dean. 

He shot you a glare, but other than that, he said nothing. Dean reached into his pocket and pulled out a packet. “Motel pamphlet rack.” He dropped it on the coffee table along with a few books. “Milan, Ohio. Birthplace of Thomas Edison.”

“So what?” you asked. 

Sam grabbed a book and leafed through it. 

Dean just raised his eyebrows at you as Sam looked up from the book. 

“You're kidding,” he said. 

Dean smirked as his brother. 

***

Well, a huge waste of time was the only thing Dean’s suggestion led to. The tour you went on at a museum showed the invention Thomas Edison believed could communicate with spirits and informed you that he was a devout occultist. However, the “spirit phone” didn’t set off the EMF detector. 

Sleep refused to claim you. Your anxiety kept your mind racing through the long hours of the night. You sat at the table in your room staring at the door just waiting for Dean to knock. However, despite it being three in the morning, he hadn’t come yet. Your fights had all been stupid and petty, but both of you were too stubborn to be the first to admit fault. 

And with each passing night, you could feel the clock ticking. You knew Dean was running out of time, and you just wanted him to hold you again. As the sun rose, your heart sank knowing he hadn’t come to make things right with you. 

You stayed in your room upset until Sam called you to come over to theirs. 

“What’s up?” you asked upon entering. 

“That girl Lanie—” Sam was referring to the victim he’d spoken to— “her Mom's ghost spooked her out pretty bad last night.”

“That sucks,” said Dean, typing furiously on his laptop. 

“What… are you doing, Dean?” you asked hesitantly. 

He looked at you briefly; the expression on his face confusing. He looked back down at his computer. “I think my dad’s right. I think the demon is here. Check it out.” He handed you some papers and dug around in his bag. 

“What is this, weather reports?” you asked, leafing through the papers.

“Omens. Demonic omens,” he responded. “Electrical storms everywhere we've been for the past two weeks.”

Trepidatiously, you said, “I don't remember any lightning storms.”

“Well, I don't remember you studying meteorology, either,” he snapped.

‘So much for us being civil,’ you thought. 

“But I'm telling you, that bastard's been tailing me; wearing some poor dude's meat,” Dean finished. 

Sam took some of the pressure off you. “And it’s following you because…?” he asked. 

“I guess I'm big game, y’know? My ass is too sweet to let outta sight.” Dean threw a wink at you, and you were getting incredibly thrown off by his changing attitude. 

“Okay. Sure,” Sam snorted.

Dean snatched the papers back from you. “Don't get too excited, Sammy. Might pull something.” He stood from the bed and moved away from you and his brother.

“Dean, look, I wanna believe this man, I really do…”

Dean cut his brother off. “Then believe it! if we get this sucker, it's Miller Time.”

“Yeah, that's another thing. Dad rattles off an exorcism that can kill a demon? I mean, not just send it back to hell, but kill it?” Dean’s eyes lit up. “I've checked it out. This is heavy duty Dark Ages. Fifteenth century.”

“Dean,” you said softly. “I checked on it, too. So did Sam. So did Bobby.”

“Okay, and?” he scoffed. 

Sam jumped in. “Look, it definitely is an exorcism, okay, there's just no evidence it can kill a demon.”

“No evidence it can't,” he rebutted. 

“Dean…” you trailed off, not wanting to start a bigger fight. 

“Hey, as far as I'm aware the only one of us who has actually been to Hell is my dad. And maybe he picked up a couple of tricks down there, like which exorcisms work,” he snapped. 

“Maybe!” you replied. “I hope so; for your sake. But we gotta be sure.”

“Why aren't we sure?” he asked. 

“’Cause I don't know what's going on around here, Dean!” you cried. “I mean, some guy blows his brains out, a little girl is scared out of her wits—”

“Wow, a couple of civvies are freaked out by some ghosts. News flash, (Y/N), people are supposed to be freaked out by ghosts!” he shot back. 

You held his stare venomously. Dean eventually dropped his head in frustration. 

“Dad tell you where to find the demon?” Sam asked carefully. 

“I'm waiting on the call!” he shouted. 

The tension in the room was thick, and you had no idea what to say.

Sam sighed deeply and tried to change the subject. “I told Lanie I'd stop by.”

Dean scoffed. “Oh, good, yeah. No, you go hang out with jailbait. Just, uh, watch out for Chris Hansen. Meanwhile I'll be here getting ready to, y’know, save my life.”

Sam shook his head and turned to the door. You just stared at the floor. 

“You two are unbelievable, y’know that?” Dean shouted. “I mean, for months, we’ve been tryin’ to break this demon deal. Now, Dad’s about to give us the fuckin’ address, and you blink? The man is dead, and you’re still butting heads with the guy?!” He turned his attention to you. “And you? What happened to us? What happened to your ‘unconditional support’?”

“Dean, you still have it!” you replied. “That was never in question! What I’m questioning is where your fuckin’ head’s at. Because this is not you.”

“Oh, god.” He rolled his eyes and began to pace. 

“I’m not gonna mince my words,” you began, anger boiling to the surface. “This is fuckin’ crazy. I mean, there is no proof. At all. All you’re acting on is blind faith.”

“Yeah, well, maybe!” He shouted back. “Y’know, maybe that's all I got, okay?”

You held his stare, the anger melting out of you at his words. When you could see tears forming in his eyes, he looked at the floor. 

Sam piped up. “Please. Just please don't go anywhere until I get back. Okay, Dean? Please.” 

Dean stayed silent. 

“C’mon, (Y/N),” Sam urged you. 

You looked up at Dean. For the first time that week, he offered you a kind word. “Go. It’s okay.”

You nodded. As you turned to go, you stared over your shoulder back at Dean. 

***

At Lanie’s house, the young girl got you up to speed on what happened to her the night before. 

“Have you told your father about any of this?” Sam asked her.

“And bother him at work?” she replied. “No. He wouldn't believe me anyway, he'd just chuck me into therapy.”

“So what did your mother say?” you asked. 

“She wanted to see me. So at first I thought I was supposed to go to the cemetery,” she sniffled. 

“Did you?” Sam prompted. 

Lanie nodded meekly. “Nothing happened. But then she started asking me to do other things.”

“What sort of things?”

She almost seemed embarrassed to say. “Bad things.”

You crouched down and looked up at her, breaking her gaze from the floor. “Lanie, please. Can you tell me what happened? It’s very important.”

She teared up, young eyes swimming in fear and sadness. “Mom told me to go to Dad's medicine cabinet.”

You waited patiently for her to continue. 

“She wanted me to take his sleeping pills.” She stopped for a minute to gather her courage. “Take all of his sleeping pills.”

“She wanted you to kill yourself?” Sam couldn’t help himself from saying. 

She nodded, crying harder. “Why would my Mom want me to do that?”

You shook your head. “I don’t know.”

“She just kept saying, ‘come to me,’ like, a million times,” she hiccuped. 

Your eyes widened. “Oh, sweet girl, that's not your mother.” You stood from the ground. 

Sam told Lanie, “Listen to me. Don't answer the phone. Don't use the computer. Don't do anything unless I say to, alright?”

You started down the stairs and listened carefully; just one set of footsteps was following you. You turned back to see Lanie still at the top of the stairs. “You okay?”

Her breathing was quick. “Where's Simon?”

“Simon?” you asked. 

“My little brother,” she responded. 

The next thing you knew, you were watching Sam shove the little boy out of the way of a speeding truck from the porch of Lanie’s house. 

Immediately, you called Dean. “Dean, it’s not your dad,” you rushed out. 

“Then what is it, (Y/N)?” he asked flippantly. 

“A crocotta,” you answered. 

“What is that, a sandwich?” he scoffed. 

“They typically live in filth. Mimic loved ones. Whisper, ‘Come to me,’ then lure you into the dark and swallow your soul,” you stated. 

Sam motioned for you to head to his rental car as soon as he delivered Simon to his sister safely. You followed quickly. 

“A crocotta, right, damn, that makes sense,” he snarkily replied. 

“Dean, c’mon, babe—”

He cut you off. “Hey, don't these things live in filth?”

“Yeah,” you replied. 

“Oh, god, at the phone company there were these flies. Pretty much as soon as we got down to the basement where this guy Stewie was hangin’ out,” he rushed out. 

“Okay, uh, okay,” you nodded. “Meet us there.”

You brought Sam up to speed on the conversation you’d had with Dean, and as night fell, he sped to the phone company. 

***

Despite calling Dean several times, you and Sam had to keep moving forward with the case. You watched as the man Sam described to you as Stewie unlocked his car. Silently, you rushed him with a metal spike. You shoved him down onto the car and held a metal spike to the back of his neck.

Stewie grunted. “What the hell?!”

“I know what you are,” you spat. “And I know how to kill you.”

“Wait, wait— Please! If we're overcharging you for the call waiting or something I- I can fix that. I am your friend!” he stammered. 

Confusion overtook you, and you turned to an equally confused Sam. You suddenly noticed a man standing behind him with a bat. “Sam, look out!” you cried. 

But it was too late. He was hit over the head with a bat, and you released the man in front of you. You threw your spike at him, but he caught it just before it hit him. He stalked toward you, and the man smiled widely. The man you’d been holding down shoved you to the ground from behind, and you were knocked out, too.

***

When you next came to, your wrists and feet were bound; that was the first thing you felt. Your head pounded, and your wrists ached from how tight the bindings were. When you opened your eyes, you turned your head to see Stewie was dead and bleeding profusely from his chest. 

You shrieked in horror, and then, the man who’d knocked you out appeared in front of you. “The fuck is wrong with you?!” you snarled.

He just laughed mockingly as he stalked between you and Sam. 

You realized something. “My last call with Dean. That was you. You led us here.”

“Some calls I make, some calls I take, but you have to admit, I had you fooled for a while. All that Edison phone crap,” he chuckled. He moved over to a telephone exchange cabinet and sighed in ecstasy. 

“What are you doing?” Sam asked. 

“I’m killing your brother,” he smiled. “Or maybe I'm killing another guy. We'll just have to see how it goes.”

***

The creature removed the knife from the chest of the man beside you. You grimaced at the wet squelching sound it made as he did. 

“Y’know, mimicking Dean's one thing. But my Dad?” Sam complimented mockingly. “That's a hell of a trick.”

“Well, once I made you two as hunters, it was easy. I found Dean's number, then your number, then your father's numbers. Then, emails, voicemails, everything. You see, people think that stuff just gets erased, but it doesn't. You'd be surprised how much of yourself is just floating out there, waiting to be plucked,” the creature grinned. 

“Dean’s not an idiot,” you stated sharply. “He’s not gonna kill that guy.”

“Then the guy kills him,” he shrugged. “And I kill you two. And here I thought I was only getting one hunter.” He stalked toward you, and you struggled harder. “Now, I’ve got another. And a pretty one, at that.”

You reared back and spat in his face. Almost like a reflex, he immediately backslapped you. 

Unfazed, your head returned to a neutral position and you just glared at him. 

“I’m gonna enjoy this,” he said, tracing the knife down your cheek. “Technology. Makes life so much easier. Used to be, I'd hide in the woods for days, weeks, whispering to people, trying to draw them out into the night. But they had community, they all looked out for each other, I'd be lucky to eat one or two souls a year. Now when I'm hungry, I simply make a phone call. You're all so connected. But you've never been so alone.”

Just as the man’s jaw unhinged like a snake to reveal rows of teeth, Sam came up behind him and wrapped his arms around his neck in a chokehold. You sat patiently while Sam and the crocatta struggled for the knife. You watched both men slam each other into various surfaces until they disappeared from view. 

You couldn’t do anything to help yourself, and you anxiously waited for— hopefully— Sam’s return into the room. 

Much to your relief, Sam stumbled back in minutes later. You grinned up at him happily.

***

You were the one to drive Sam’s rental car back to the motel seeing as he was injured and sore from his fight with the monster. You went at least twenty miles-an-hour over the speed limit for the entirety of the drive. 

You burst into Sam and Dean’s room, and you began to panic when you didn’t see him there. 

Then, you checked your room, breathing out in relief when you saw Dean holding a wash cloth to his eye. “Dean!” You ran to him, kneeling down in front of him.

He looked up at you, and you immediately kissed him passionately. He returned your kiss eagerly. When you broke away from him, you took the cloth from Dean’s hands gently to help him clean the wound.

“Sweetheart,” he said. “I— I’m so sorry.”

You placed your free hand on his knee. “We’ll talk in a minute, alright? Let me clean you up first.”

He nodded. 

***

“There,” you told him having placed the final bandage on his assortment of cuts. “That guy kicked the shit out of you.” Although Dean would normally laugh at jokes like that, his countenance was completely serious. “I’m so sorry,” he repeated. 

“I know,” you said softly. “I am, too.”

“I just— I lashed out, and that wasn’t fair to you. You were right,” Dean admitted. “It scares me how well you can fuckin’ read me. And with everything going on, I just—”

“I get it,” you cut him off. “I’m sorry, too. I was being petty. I got mean, too.” You paused for a moment. “I’m sorry it wasn’t really your dad.”

Dean looked down at the ground. “Naw, I gave you a hell of a time on this one.” He huffed. “I wanted to believe so badly that there was a way outta this. I mean, I'm staring down the barrel at this thing. You know, Hell. For real, forever, and I just…” he trailed off, unable to finish. 

Your eyebrows scrunched sadly, and your eyelashes flickered. 

“I’m scared, sweetheart. I’m… I’m really scared.” As tears pooled in his eyes, he couldn’t seem to meet yours. 

You nodded, tearing up as well. “I know.”

“I guess I was willing to believe anything. You know, the last act of a desperate man,” he tried to joke through his stifled cries. 

“I can’t believe I’m saying this, but there’s nothing wrong with having hope, Dee,” you told him gently. 

“Hope doesn't get you jack squat,” he scoffed. “I can't expect Dad to show up with some miracle at the last minute. I can't expect anybody to, y’know? I mean, the only person that can get me out of this thing is me.”

“And I’m right there with you,” you told him. “Every step of the way. To Hell and back.”

Dean offered a lopsided smile. “To Hell and back.”

Series Rewrite Taglist: @polireader @brightlilith @atcamillanorrman @jrizzelle @insomnia-bookworm @procrastination20 @mrs-liebgott @djs8891 @tiggytaylor @staple-your-mouth @jesstherebel @rach5ive @strawberrykiwisdogog @bruhidkjustwannaread @mxltifxnd0m @sunshine-on-marz @big-ol-boat @mgchaser @capncrankle @chervbs @simpingdeadcharacters @nesnejwritings @stillhere197 @tearsforhan @take-it-on-the-run @iloveyou2mia @maxinehufflepuffprincess @ohgeehowdigethere @seninjakitey @berarenado @s0urw00lf @princessleahorgana @quarterhorse19 @isla-finke-blog @silverdoragon @karacaroldanvers @gayandfairycore @examishbookwyrm @star-yawnznn @real-sharena-h @fandomloverrr @metalmonki @onlyangel-444 @yu-winchester @benniwiththefanni @daisychaingirl @immagods @missmieux @yoongi-holland @littledebbieinabigworld

[miniwheat77]

Silence. (Ghost x Reader.)

!nsfw, smut, p in v sex, unprotected sex, trauma, panic attacks, blood, death, MDNI!

Short lil ghost fic, hope you enjoy. 💖 (not edited)

If there's anything that's more scary than a warzone.

Anything more terrifying than running through a battlefield, bullets flying past you, explosions around you.

A war is terrifying. But there is one thing even more chilling than that.

Silence.

It's all they hear on your end of the radio. Silence.

Just minutes ago you were responding, you were alive and well and talking to them. Now, nothing. It takes them all off guard. They're worried about you immediately, needing to get to your last coordinates. So they rush there.

They can see your trail. Blood and bodies lay in the wrath that was once you, ambushing and killing to get to the reason behind this mission in the first place. One that they hadn't clued you in on in the first place. Now, as they approach you, they realize they should've. They should’ve asked more questions because it might’ve saved you from what’s to come. You've stumbled upon a lab, standing where you are. You're grief stricken and there's nothing anyone can do to stop it now. Thousands of photos line the walls. Test subjects, something that you had once been involved in. You're sick the moment you see it. The photos, the blood. The wounds and the innocent people dying when there's nothing you could do.

"What the fuck is this?" The venom is clear in your tone as you spin to look at your Captain, who had failed to tell you what this mission was in the first place.

You turn back toward it. "I'm sorry Y/N. I had no idea. It was Laswell who set it up." He stresses at the way you look at the photos on the wall. You seethe, staying quiet. Turning back and making your way to the wall. You tug a photo off, tack falling to the ground. You see the innocent girl inside the photo and you recognize who she is. Having seen her killed the same day you had escaped, your empty promises to her. How you'd get her out and she'd get to see her family again and how you watched a bullet pierce through her skull. Her lifeless body falling, blood spattering onto you. It was then when Captain Price had arrived to help you.

It's what made you decide to join the task force after everything. After being kidnapped and tortured by a foreign enemy. How nobody seen or heard from you for months, how they knew not to send you on anymore missions involving this operation knowing that you were one of few surviving members. It would set you off and that's why you stayed away from it. John was going to let Laswell have it when he got you back to base.

It takes little to nothing to send you into a fit of rage. You start ripping everything off of the walls, throwing equipment, kicking, and destroying everything physically around you. You needed to.

They let you until you're hyperventilating.

It takes Ghost to pull you back, nobody else was brave enough to intervene and he holds you to his chest as you flail and pant, blinded by the memories of being held captive and being tortured. Watching all of those innocent people die around you, some of which were your own. You didn't take enough time to heal and that was apparent to Captain Price as he watches you freak out, having bottled everything up. Watching it explode as you fell into a full blown panic attack. He shakes his head, seething as he exits the building. Phoning Laswell the moment he could no longer hear your cries.

"John."

"So help me god Laswell. If you knew what this was and you let me bring her in here.." He hesitates.

"What do you mean?"

"This is a direct connection to the operation Y/N was in before this task force, Laswell. She's hysterical." He hisses. Laswell can tell through the phone that he's beyond pissed.

"I didn't John, I had intel from some other sources. I didn't know." She hesitates. "Well. Double check next time." He stops responding after that.

When John returns, Simon is still holding you, but he's turned you away from everything that you had just destroyed. Your eyes are bloodshot and you have tear stains on your cheeks. You stare ahead like there's nothing going on behind your eyes and it's unnerving.

Silence.

Nothing but silence and they hate silence. Ghost holds you tight. Like if he lets go you'll disappear into thin air and John silently thanks him for it. Ghost of all should know how you feel right now. Having lost everything himself. When he feels you're ready, he moves you from the room. Helping you up but keeping your head turned away from everything. You didn't need to see this anymore.

When you arrive back on base, you’re silent. Making a b-line right for your room and they don’t see you for the rest of the night. You sit in there for the most part. Your reaction today probably scared everyone and you wish you hadn’t reacted the way you did. But you couldn’t control yourself.

Something shocked you today.

Ghost. The way he held you. You knew he was one who was never into physical touch or affection but that’s all he’d done. He held you to his chest, whispering nothing but soothing things into your ear to calm you. And the fucked up part about it was how well it had worked.

For the next couple of weeks, the aura around Ghost is different. Your eye contact is prolonged in passing, and whatever you feel. You know that he can feel it too. When you pass by him, it’s like everything moves in slow motion and he holds your eye contact until the last possible second. His gaze is chilling.

It’s you who seeks him out first. Late at night, you come knocking and you don’t know why. You don’t remember your feet carrying you to his door this late at night but it’s almost like he’s waiting for you. Still fully dressed despite the hour. You raise your hand and hesitate before you knock very quietly. He says nothing as he opens it up and sees you. Eyes just piercing yours. He steps to the side, allowing you in. Not a word spoken between the both of you. You stand in the middle of his room, turned toward him as he closes the door. You can see his gloved fingertips twist the lock. Swallowing hard, your eyes trail back up to his eyes.

You’re the first one to break the silence.

“You feel it too… don’t you?” You’re already breathless and it comes out more pathetic than you think it does.

He says nothing. Which is the answer you think you want. Ghost is guarded, of course he wouldn’t admit to it. But he’d also deny you if it weren’t true.

He’s on you before you even have time to react. His mask is pulled off and his lips are on yours, pure Ghost. Nothing but a killing machine who you’d hardly talked to before all of this. He’s got you pressed against the wall. He helps you remove your sweatpants, tugging them down your legs.

A hiss leaves your lips as he raises you up. He holds you against the wall, pressing his knee up against it to reach for his belt and zipper. Tugging his jeans just past his cock to free it. You can feel his bare skin brush against yours. Not a single fabric blocking him from you now.

His shaft presses against your entrance and he has time to think about if he should do this or not.

He stares you in the eyes, they’re watery and puffy. Your lips are blushing and plump from kissing him.

“Please-“ you mewl. “Y/N.” He warns. Finally coming to, enough to realize what he’s doing. “I’m sorry. I don’t want to take advantage of you.” He hisses.

“Simon.” Your voice is low.

“Fuck me until it hurts-“ you hiccup. Looking up at him.

His breath hitches in his throat. He rests his cock right up against your entrance and watches your face for any discomfort for at least a minute.

When he sees nothing but pure lust in your gaze, he thrusts up into you. Penetrating you. He cuts your cry off with his hand but hears just a second of it. It rattles him to his core, the way you sound. Ghost doesn’t know what this is, what his sudden feelings for you are. And it’s so weird that you felt everything too. Something has changed, drastically. He holds your hips tight to the wall as he hammers his hips into yours, your own hands clamp over your mouth. He’s rough, but in the most pleasurable way. Even with his tight grip on your hips, fingertips sure to leave bruises. You still don’t hurt.

You move your hands from your mouth, biting your lip to silence yourself as you wrap your arms around his neck to kiss him again. It’s sloppy and messy, just like the sex you’re having but you couldn’t care less.

He moves you to his bed. It creaks a little bit but Ghost can’t find it in himself to care at this moment in time. Your thighs shake as he ravages you. He keeps a bruising pace, not letting up or relenting in any way. He needs you to feel every part of him. He needs to be overbearing, almost to the brink of too much but not crossing it.

You clutch the sheets hard, he tugs his shirt off finally. Taking a deep breath. His hair is damp from sweat, beads of it settle on his face. Drips slide down the strands of his hair. Falling to land on your chest, his hair was a little overgrown for his liking but he hadn’t gotten the chance to cut it just yet. The wetness is what brings you down to earth to raise his chin, making him look you in the eyes. That pressure is building and there’s no going back now. You hold his eye contact, hearing his breathing start to get more jagged and out of control. He was right there, and so were you.

You cum first, eyes screwing shut and he clamps a hand over your mouth, hips still moving into yours as he chases after his own high. When he cums, he can’t hold back the groan. Eyes rolling back as he fills you. Shaking as he experiences the most intense orgasm he’s ever had by far, barely being able to ride it out from being so sensitive. He flinches as you throb around him, it’s almost too much. “F-fuck” he hisses, collapsing on top of you. Resting his head on your chest. “Shit..” he mumbles.

“I’m sorry.” He breathes. His hair is wet and it’s cold all of a sudden.

“For what?” He raises his head to look at you. “I.. I shouldn’t have pushed you like this. And I shouldn’t have..” he hesitates. “I should’ve pulled out.”

“It’s okay. I’ll take care of it, don’t worry about it.” You take in a deep breath. “You didn’t push me. I came to you.” You breathe. “I’m glad you did. Stay.” He mumbles. Seeing the edge of your lips turn up in a smile. “Okay.”

You end up staying there until morning when you sneak off to your own room. Nobody knows what happened, and you want it to stay that way for now.

You’re not sure what this is. What these new feelings for him are. Of course they’re intimidating. But you don’t let them scare you. It’s the start of something new, and bonding with someone who understands your trauma and knows how to help you.

You can help each other.

[a-small-safe-place]

His Haven Pt. 3

Part 1 Part 2

Homelander x Psychiatrist!Reader

Homelander had arrived at your office earlier than your usual meeting time. You had asked him to be there around an hour earlier than your scheduled session. He was putting on a fake smile; he was always good at that. Homelander thought he knew what was happening. You were dropping him as a client. You had to be. You had all but threatened it the last time he came to your house when he was desperate for someone to talk to or even just be around. When his reflection was saying things that were beyond harsh and his penthouse felt a little too empty. Even if you did drop him as a client, he didn’t plan on going anywhere, but it bothered him that you would have even tried.

Homelander stepped into the office without knocking, like he always did. He knew that bothered you, but he didn’t need to knock. It was obvious to him when someone else was in the room, and you would not be dumb enough to book someone over his time with you. He immediately noticed your heart beating faster and the stink of adrenaline all over your body. You were afraid. The smell of adrenaline was fresh, so that meant one thing: you were afraid of him.

Homelander took his seat across from you. You smiled a fake smile before asking, “How are you today?” He wanted to gripe about you, tell you that you had no reason to be afraid of him right now, tell you that even if you tried to drop him as a client, he wasn’t leaving. “Fine,” is all he says with an irritated tone. “What’s so important that I had to be here an hour before our meeting? You know I’m a busy man,” he scolds. Your heart rate spikes.

“Well, we’ve been having some issues with boundaries. Usually, I discuss these things in our first meeting, but since my contract with The Seven was a unique experience, I hadn’t bothered to have a boundaries talk with any of you, at least not an in-depth one.” After you finish talking, Homelander relaxes a bit. You weren’t trying to get rid of him. It was a relief. He figured since you were human; you probably didn’t notice the change in his demeanor, but in reality, it was a very noticeable change. He was like a feral cat finally calming down enough to eat or drink.

“Boundaries, boundaries, boundaries,” Homelander mocks a bit. “Is that all you doctors want to talk about? I thought you wanted to talk about me?”

“This is about you. It’s about both of us,” you counter. He stands back up and begins pacing a bit with his hands behind his back. “Look, we need to have boundaries. They are important. In our first session, I said that I am here for you, and I cannot be here for you if we have no boundaries. If these boundaries continue to be pressed, then I will recommend you to another psychiatrist, one that will be better suited to your needs.” It’s obvious this pisses him off enough that his mask drops. Homelander’s already thin lips flatten into a line of a scowl. At first, his eyes widen a bit, clearly shocked at your sudden assertiveness, but then narrowing somewhat out of anger. He is not looking at you. He’s looking in your direction but pointedly avoiding you or maybe looking through you. Homelander seems to be lost in thought or as if he has suddenly begun to disassociate.

“So you are dropping me?” he finally says. His voice is flat, and his eyes are somewhat glassy. “No. I am still your psychiatrist. We will just be working on our boundaries. It’s my fault. I should have discussed this with you the minute I realized we would be meeting regularly, and I should not have been so indulgent, but that stops now. We will both be good, okay? And you can continue to be my patient. But there will be no time for us outside of this office, and you will quit showing up at my house or following me home. I know you are lonely, but I cannot fill that loneliness as your psychiatrist. I can help you understand why you are having those feelings, but I cannot fix them.” You speak with a confidence that Homelander has never seen from you. He likes this attitude you have.

He ponders it for a moment before sitting back down. Homelander thinks he can make this work, for now. He will still get to see you and visit your house while you’re out. You’re still his. “Okay, I’ll behave,” Homelander says in a way that borders on pride and flirting. He feels somewhat proud of you for being so assertive with you, even if he’s not a huge fan of the outcome.

He knows you will come around eventually, and when you do, he will be waiting with a dinner reservation and the mirror on the ceiling of his bedroom freshly cleaned.

Tag list: @demodemo909 @misadventures0fdes

[adarafaelbarba]

“come and sit on my face and i’ll show you how much i missed you”

With barba? Slight age gap, he keeps canceling dates and she’s mad that Carmen had to tell her and not him

A/N: Rafael is 48 in this one (it's right before he leaves for Iowa) and reader is 33 😊 Warnings: Smut, minors DNI! Some arguing in the beginning, looks like they won't make up, but spicy in the second half, Rafael using his skills to win her back.

You were beyond pissed at Rafael. Of course, you'd expected there might be some hiccups early on in the relationship, you were both busy people, and some nights might be harder to plan dates on than others.

But this was the fifth time this month that something had come up, and he'd have to cancel. Worse still was the fact that he'd gotten his assistant, Carmen, to call you about it.

On a normal day, you and Carmen got on like a charm, but you could hear in her voice when she called you, that she did not want to make this call.

So when Rafael finally showed up at your place, at 11pm, you nearly slammed the door in his face.

"Amor! Please! I'm sorry okay, something came up with the case last minute and I couldn't just leave it!" He tried, but you couldn't even look at him.

"Always something to do with work. I understand you have a demanding job, Rafael, but so do I, and I still make time for you. You couldn't just have asked one of the 25 paralegals working under the SVU department at One Hogan Place to fix it for you?"

"It's not that easy, this case is too delicate--"

"If they don't get to try the hard cases, how will they learn?! I asked for time off, you could've done the same!" You didn't want to yell at him, but this might be the last straw.

"Please, let me make it up to you, amor--"

"I don't know if you can."

He shot forward and grabbed your hand, pulling at it until you looked at him. "This can't be it--amor, please give me another chance!"

You bit your lip, looking at him, he looked like he was about to cry, a weakness of yours when it came to him, "Rafael--"

"Please, amor, I'll do anything--."

You shook your head, needing time.

---

Three months after you last saw Rafael, you were at the Manhattan SVU, covering a shift for Sonny who had to call in sick, something that honestly never happened.

Upon entering, you spotted the last person you wanted to see, standing in Liv's office. The two looked so homey, it stirred something inside you that you didn't like.

Sitting down at Sonny's desk, you tried your best to ignore the feeling, and going about the case you were working instead, when suddenly there was a tap at your shoulder. You looked up to see Amanda nudging you.

"Barba is looking at you, what gives?"

You flushed slightly. "It's complicated," you murmured, not wanting anyone else to hear, least of all, Rafael.

"Wait?! You two?!" Amanda exclaimed, making you want the earth to eat you up whole. "Aren't you like 15 years younger than him?!"

"Is that any of your concern, detective Rollins?" Rafael's voice sounded stern, like an angry school teacher, stirring something completely different from earlier inside you.

Amanda managed to get an "I'm sorry out" before she sat back down to work on her own stuff.

"Can we talk, y/n?" Rafael was right in front of you now.

"What's there to talk about--." But you got up regardless, not wanting to have an audience as you broke down.

The two of you made your way to the on-call room, no one would be using it for the next hour, so he could try and explain himself in peace for now.

Once the door was closed, he trapped you between it and his body, looking down at you. "Sit on my face, amor, and I'll show you how much I've missed you." he whispered, then you heard the lock clicking behind you.

"We're at work--"

"I can be quiet, can you?"

As if on queue, you let out a whimper. "we shouldn't--"

He dipped his head, his nose brushing against your cheek, his breath hot on your skin. "Let me show you how much I've missed you", he repeated.

It felt like your legs were turning into jelly, and you leant up to finally kiss him. The kiss turning desperate as you made out. Rafael taking the opportunity to grab your waist and walk you to the bed.

"Strip for me." He was as demanding now as he was in court, which honestly turned you on more than you wanted to admit.

Doing as you were told, you stripped for Rafael while he laid down on the bed, getting ready for you.

"Now be a good girl and sit on my face, but keep quiet, won't want the others to hear you."

You nodded, straddling his head. As soon as you did, he pulled you down onto him, beginning the onslaughter on your pussy. A small yelp coming from you, but you were quick to clamp a hand over your mouth. Your eyes rolling back at how good he made you feel.

It would take no effort at all from him to get you to the edge, and he knew that, which made him so much more lethal when he gave you pleasure.

And sure enough, you soon found yourself on the edge of your release, on of your hands going into his hair, holding him there while he helped you through the best orgasm you'd ever had.

Getting off him, he had the biggest grin on his face, and you wanted to stay mad, but in that moment, you only felt love for him.

He got up after you, pulling you in for a heated kiss as he rubbed your heated body up and down. "I'll never betray you again, amor, please give me another chance."

You nodded at that, "one more chance, no more." Which he agreed to, helping you get redressed.

~~~

Tagging:

@plaidbooks @storiesofsvu @cycat4077 @thatesqcrush @alwaysachorusgirl @im-just-a-mississippi-girl @bisexual-dreamer02 @misscharlielulu @xoxabs88xox @muchadoaboutcj @beatrice-san @meetmeatyourworst @thats-jaywalking @cursedashes @mysoulisasunflower @crazy4chickennuggets @imaginelover88 @beccabarba @itsjustmyfantasyroom @detective-giggles @guitita @ladylionstar @achataa @nessamc @peauxheaux @silversprings-mp3 @polkadotpenguin16 @pepperbstark @im-a-slut-for-this-man2 @chickensarentcheap @irishavengersassemble

Wanna be on the tag list? Fill out this form to be part of the team 🥰

[beah388love]

Silent Treatment

18+ Minors DNI!!!

Full Masterlist Legend Masterlist

Pairing: Reggie Kray x Fem!Reader (nicknamed bee)

Summary:Reggie accidentally hurts you…

Warnings: swearing,fighting,punching,slapping,blood,broke glass,injuries,crying!!! (Please tell me if I missed any!!!)

Im not gonna lie I don’t even know how this fight started.

I think it was about some business deal or something stupid but it escalated quickly…

“You’re a fuckin Disgrace mate.” Reggie yelled at Ron

“You fuckin cunt! cunt!” Ron yelled as he slapped Reggie across the face.

“Ron! No. Ron! Stop!” Reggie yelled back punching him in the face and ducking when Ron punched back.

Ron grabbed a Wine bottle and held it up. “Ron! No! No that’s a bottle! Ron.” Reggie yelled as he held up a finger at him.

Ron screamed as he lunged at Reggie, bottle in hand still.

“Fuck! Ron!” Reggie yelled as he grabbed the bottle off of him.

Ron screamed as he bit Reggie’s hand, reg yelling as he punched him again.

“Fuckin! Wanker!” Reggie yelled pushing Ron off of him and “Reggie!” You yelled trying to get his attention and that’s when he threw the bottle directly at you.

You screamed, as the bottle smashed into pieces, luckily you held your arm up, but now your arm was bleeding and you had cuts scattered all over your face.

Reggie stood there in shock, “right that’s enough!” Albie yelled holding his arms out between the brothers.

You wiped the blood off of your lip, looking up at Reggie.

You stared at him with a blank expression before walking to the bar, grabbing a glass of wine and your purse and leaving the club.

“Y/n- I-“ Reggie stuttered

“enough reg. Mate.” Albie said holding his hand out.

“C’mon help me up.” Ron asked looking up at reg.

And he shook his head as he held his hand out and Ron pulled him down on top of him.

“Fuck sake Ron!” Reggie shouted

“Im very sorry.” Ron said and reg nodded

“It’s okay. Are you done?” Reggie huffed

“Is she gone.” Ron asked looking around the club

“Yes. She’s gone mate.” Reggie sighed

“She’s a keeper.” Ron said and Reggie stood up.

“Yes. Thanks mate” Reggie said patting him on the chest before wiping the blood off his face.

“Albie! Take care of Ron!” Reggie yelled as he ran out of the club.

Run in down the road to find you.

Fuck it was late, there were weirdos about.

“Fuck!” Reggie yelled as he kicked a wall in anger when he saw no sign of you.

———

The next morning.

“there she is.” Reggie said pointing to you through the car window screen.

“Yeah. I got her.” Albie said as he followed you through the market.

“All right, stop here.” Reggie said as albie pulled the car over.

“That girls gonna be the death of me.” Reggie said as he got out the car.

“Mind how you go.” Albie said before he shut the door.

“Bee. Bee. Excuse me sorry, ” Reggie said as he pushed past people as he tried to catch up with you.

He ran up next to you, “I need to have a word with you about something.”

You didn’t reply.

You were beyond pissed and he knew it.

You were always mad but this was the angriest you had ever been before.

You was so mad you didn’t even yell.

“Bee? C’mon…talk to me?” Reggie said as he walked faster when you did.

“Bee? Please can we forget last night. Let’s restart.” Reggie said walking in front of you.

And that’s when he saw your cut up face.

He didn’t even want to think about what your arm looked like.

“I- I didn’t mean to- it was-“ Reggie stammered and you huffed walking past him quickly and he followed you.

“We- we can forget everything that’s bad right? And we can just keep everything that’s good?” He said and you shook your head walking quickly and leaving the market.

And he still followed after you.

“Silent treatment? Really?” Reggie huffed behind you and you rolled your eyes.

You headed towards your house door and quickly knocked.

“Bee! Please talk to me? We need to talk!” Reggie said walking towards you but luckily Tommy answered the door and you rushed in.. “Bee? What happened to your face?!“ Tommy asked worried

You was about time walk away but Reggie grabbed your arm making you yelp in pain.

Billy came out after hearing shouting “Bee Are you alright?” He asked you and you shook your head

“Fuck! I didn’t mean to-“ Reggie was cut off by you running upstairs.

“What did you do?!” Tommy shouted at him.

“I didn’t mean to hurt her- I” Reggie said running his hand through his hair.

“You did that!” Tommy yelled and Reggie punched the skin between his brows.

“I didn’t mean to it was a fuckin accident!” Reggie yelled.

“Oi! Get inside” Billy said to Tommy and he glared at Reggie before waking away.

“Reg, I don’t know what happened but I suggest you leave and leave her alone for a couple hours” Billy said sternly to Reggie and he rubbed the back of his neck and nodded.

Billy shut the door and hurried to your bedroom.

“Bee? What happened?” He asked knocking on your door.

“I’m coming in okay?” He said and walked in, you was laying on your bed holding your face into your pillow.

“Talk to me?” He said and you nodded

“Reg and Ron had a fight..and reg threw a wine bottle at me…” you said removing the pillow from your face and he sucked in a breath.

“Please don’t be mad at him. It really was an accident I promise.” You said to him honestly and he sighed.

“Promise?” He asked holding his pinky out and you shook it.

You never broke pinky promises.

“Alright, this is his last warnings though” he warned and you nodded.

“Tommy said something about your arm?” Billy said scared to see the injury.

You gently pulled your sleeve up and he sighed again.

“That looks..painful.” Billy said looking at your bruised,bloody arm.

“It is.” You rolled your eyes making him laugh.

“Ronnie and Johnny are not gonna like this.”

“Please don’t tell them yet” you pleaded and he sucked in a breath and nodded.

———

The next day.

Reggie was stood outside your house. Knocking on the door.

The house was empty besides you.

You opened the door sucking in a breath.

“Bee…I’m sorry please listen to me.” Reggie pleaded waiting to see if you’d shut the door but you didn’t.

“It was an accident! It won’t happen again! I would never hurt you. Well I did- but it was an accident! I didn’t-“ Reggie rambled on and you had a small smile watching him.

“God, please say something! Yell at me! Anything I don’t care just say something.” Reggie said looking at you sadly.

“You’re a real prick.” You said and he relaxed.

“I know. I know. I’m sorry” he said opening his arms and you hesitantly hugged him, relaxing into his embrace.

He rested his face into your hair, smelling your comforting scent.

“I love you so fucking much it hurts. How can I make it up to you?” He asked sniffling.

And you smiled into his chest.

“Babysit with me this Friday?” You asked and he nodded “I don’t think Tommy likes me”

“Then you can bond with him” you said smiling raising your eyebrows. Making him laugh.

“And you might wanna talk to my brothers…they do not like you right now” you said and Reggie sighed nodding.

“Yeah I’m already planning that..”

Your brothers forgave him with a last warning.

And Tommy and Reggie grew a little bit closer.

[lurkingshan]

Japanese QL Corner

My cup runneth over with excellent jql, and we just got confirmation that Cosmetic Playlover will be joining the line up next week. All but one of these are on Gaga; I highly recommend picking them up!

Takara's Treasure

I really love this unassuming little show and how gently it's advancing this relationship. This week reinforced that Taishin is the only one who really sees Takara beyond his popular hot guy reputation. He can tell he is struggling and he notices when he is overcome by sadness. Their adventure helping the tiny child find his way home was a nice way for them to bond and see each other's good qualities, and also to prompt some reflection from Takara about his own relationship with his mother. I am still dying to know more about what happened there.

I Hear the Sunspot

Most of this episode had me chewing glass; I loved every single minute of their camping trip. Seeing Kohei's walls coming down was so rewarding, and I was relieved when he finally stopped holding back and let himself smile. Taichi's ongoing struggle with understanding what he feels for Kohei was also super compelling, and I liked that Kohei got to express some frustration at his obliviousness. He flirts all the time without seeming to realize he's doing it, both with Kohei and with other people, and it's hard for Kohei to hold back when his confession is already laying there between them. Taichi seemed to finally be putting some things together when he confessed that he doesn't hate Kohei's attention. And because I loved all of that so much, it was a bit of a womp womp to then do a time skip only to introduce a new third party to inspire jealousy and set them right back where they were last week. It feels like wheel spinning, so I do hope we'll be moving through that quickly.

Ayaka is in Love with Hiroko

Besties, I AM PISSED OFF. I cannot believe the behavior of the people around Hiroko this week, and I am ready to fight them on her behalf. Let me just say this real clearly: Hiroko does not owe anyone the truth about her sexuality, and if she doesn't want to be out at work, that is her choice and nobody else's goddamn business. Risa is off the best girl list forever after the shit she pulled today. Digging for gossip and outing Hiroko only so she could criticize her to try to sway Ayaka was some ugly shit, and I will not be forgetting it. And I am also side-eyeing Hiroko's "friends" at the bar, who saw Hiroko panic when she ran into those two, heard them call her senpai, and still spilled all her secrets when Risa came poking around (though I appreciate that at least Mama quickly realized they'd fucked up and apologized). I am sad that Hiroko doesn't actually have anyone on her side, and it's clear from the brief flashbacks we keep seeing that she has been betrayed in the past. I am curious to see where they go with Ayaka's quest from here, because continuing to push Hiroko when she's drawn a firm boundary is not the move. Something in the dynamic will need to shift.

Mr. Mitsuya's Planned Feeding

This shoooooooooow. I'm obsessed. Episode 2 is now available on @isaksbestpillow's blog. This week we got more hints about Mitsuya's past and other relationships (just how many boyfriends do you have, sir?), met my new favorite Shige, and learned about Ishida's past baseball career and why he's still feeling a little lost trying to establish himself in a new field. I loved following Mitsuya and Ishida on their long day together; their chemistry feels so natural and the whole sequence with Mitsuya making the tenshinhan was excellent. I was also super excited that Ishida has figured himself out quickly and knows he's crushing on Mitsuya. He's going to need that awareness because he appears to have a lot of competition.

Twilight Out of Focus

Tagging in @twig-tea to talk about this week's episode, which shifted the focus to a new couple.

[i-write-sometimes-maybe]

Little Girl Gone- Emily X GN!Reader/BAU X GN!Reader.

Synopsis: Being back in your old town, it’s no surprise you’d have to see a person you never wanted to see again, the only difference this time is that you can handle yourself.

Warnings: Insinuations of past abuse but no details given, misuse of reader's pronouns by abuser not the team, talks of not handling past trauma but Emily is there for us, we’re really just a badass.

Word Count: 1.6k

A/n: THIS MAY HAVE A TRIGGER FOR ANYONE WITH PAST TRAUMA AND I DIDNT INCLUDE ANY DETAILS FOR THAT REASON, IF THAT MAY BE TOO MUCH FOR YOU PLEASE SKIP THIS ONESHOT. Other than that, yes this is based off a song leave me alone 🥰 You guys have no idea how long I’ve wanted to get something out for you guys, hopefully more will come soon!

☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎

You had heard he's back in town, and clearly, he hasn't changed a bit.

He was sitting there, appearing clueless, with you staring at him behind the glass. Your anger was boiling to the surface, and while it was clear to the team you were upset, they had no idea.

Your attention snapped back when a mention of your name was heard, the reason was beyond you, "That's what this is about? That bitch Y/n?" He chuckled and it made you sick. "Please, that little girl has nothing on me."

Hearing the way he said your name brought back some unfriendly memories you tried so hard to forget.

But when he muttered your name again, seeing how much it pissed Derek off, you knew you needed to do something. You have heard enough, it's not about you. It's about the 3 murdered girls.

You opened the door of the observation room to see Hotch standing there, "I'm going in there."

"That's not a good idea, you know that. He's trying to get under your skin."

"Hotch, with all due respect, I wasn't asking. Besides, I'm not the small child he last saw me as. I'm going in the there."

Hotch just quietly stood back, maybe a familiar face would get him to give them something they could use.

You walked into a familiar scene, Derek towering over the unsub shouting at the top of his voice, and the unsub pretending it's doing nothing to them.

"YOU HAVE NO BUSINESS-"

"Derek!"

With your interruption, both men stopped and looked towards you. Derek knew it was up to you, but he didn't like that idea. 

And him. Oh, him. 

He looked like he thought he'd finally got something he wanted if only he knew. Well, he would soon enough.

"Derek, I've got this. Go take a breather, I think Garcia has something she wanted to go over with you."

"I'm not leaving you in here with him." He stood tall in protest.

The man stood, suddenly filled with some form of faux confidence, "Yeah, little girl, you don't wanna be left here with me, unless you do?" His sadistic simper took over his face, his arm reaching out to touch you.

You grabbed his wrist and instantly snapped it back, flipping his arm behind him and then slamming him into the metal interrogation table.

"Oh, you wanna fight me now?" You pulled his arm further. "That little girl is gone. So tell me, are you big enough?"

"Fucking bitch!" His pain filled his voice and you tried to hide the joy it brought you.

"Do you feel that? Me twisting your arm until it breaks? Do you see how much stronger I've gotten?" He was struggling under you, and you were handling him with ease.

Derek was proud watching you, knowing the things that happened to you.

But the rest of the team was behind the glass watching carefully, they knew about him but not the things he'd done. But they did know your strength.

But now, he was groaning and mumbling something.

"Say that again, I didn't quite hear ya! You messed with the wrong 'bitch' in the wrong era!" You pulled him up off the table and shoved his face into the wall in a quick move, moving closer to him, "Honey, I changed so much since I last saw ya."

"I'm gonna say it, I'm proud of them." Rossi wasn't hiding his proud smile either as he watched you move him around like a rag doll.

You once again pulled him from the wall and slammed him back into the table.

"You know, maybe I will leave. I think I'd grab a cup of coffee, want some L/n?" Derek asked, knowing you definitely could handle yourself.

"I'm good, I'm awake now."

"NO NO NO! She'll kill me! You can't leave me alone with her!" He pleaded, as much as he could with his face smashed into metal.

"You know, I don't really think that's a bad thing. Do you, L/n?"

"Not at all."

He tried moving from your grasp, "No!"

"Then tell me where the girl is!" Derek slammed his hands on the table in his face, though he was still firmly pinned to the table all thanks to you, you could still feel the way he flinched.

Within the moments you walked into that room, the man finally showed how scared he actually was, realizing that now he truly is nothing.

"BOAT!"

You pull him off the table, holding him to face Derek and the team behind the mirror. 

"What was that?" You asked, hearing what he said but needing more details.

"The girl. She's on a boat. Down at the marina, slip 7."

"Ah, so you do know what's good for you." Derek said as he left the room.

"No! Wait!"

A smirk came to your face, and you knew that if you weren't an active agent you'd definitely get your revenge.

In a swift move, you had him pinned to the wall by his throat.

You took a split second to look at the man that robbed you of so much.

My god did he look like shit.

Years didn't do him good, and the illegal things he tried to hide likely didn't help.

"You. You got lucky. I've got too damn much to lose if I go after you now," You were practically seething. "But know this, you are nothing. You are shit. I took all of what happened to me, and I made something of myself. I did. Me. So don't you think for one second that you ever had an effect on me." He definitely had an effect on you, years worth of effects. But he wasn't going to know that. He didn't need that. 

He may have ruined the child you were, but he doesn't get to even be near the person you grew into.

You simply released him, part of the child that's still inside you wanted to do more but the other part of that child was so proud of how far you came.

You left him for the uniformed officer to take, walking out of the interrogation room to get some air or a drink, only there was something in your path.

Or rather, some people.

Half the team to be precise. David, Emily, and Reid were still in the precinct. And they just witnessed basically everything.

"I'm proud of you kiddo," Rossi spoke first, and only then did you release the breath you were holding.

"Thanks."

"I think this calls for a celebration, tonight. Your pick." He spoke with a head nod and walked out.

Reid just did his smile thing, and you knew you'd both likely have a conversation later.

But Emily, she stayed put, letting you go to her.

"You know you can let it out now, only if you want of course." She said finally as you walked up to her.

A shaky breath left you and you attempted to hide it with a faux chuckle.

She did know you the best.

"Come on, out with it. You know you can talk to me." Her damn eyebrow raise had you wanted to spill everything like always.

"I was so scared, Em." Another unstable breath came from your lips.

Emily reached up to wipe a tear you hadn't felt escape.

"God, I'd be worried if you weren't. You're only human." Her hand went to cup your cheeks, and for a second you simply looked into her eyes.

You didn't really know what to say, so you said nothing. You feared the only thing that would come out would be a sob.

"You handled that so well, and I speak for the team when I say I'm proud of you. It was hot the way you handled him." A small chuckle left you, she always knew how to get you to laugh.

"It just, brought back so many things I've tried for so long to forget." You looked to the floor with shame, ashamed it still got to you.

"Hey, look at me," She pointed your chin so you'd look at her. "Don't think that there's ever a right time to just 'get over it' because there's not. Everyone has their own timeline, and their own way of coping, that makes us human. And the fact that you didn't give in to the revenge you know you were thinking of, just shows how much you've grown."

She was right. Of course she was, when wasn't she? She knew the ins and outs of you. Every curve and every line. She knew your soul better than your body did.

"Come on, the team will finish the paperwork and we can go back to the hotel, you can shower and we'll meet them after for drinks." Your head rested against her shoulder as she put her arm around you while you both walked out of the precinct.

While you both arrived at your hotel room, the team safely got the girl from the boat, though she was a bit shaken up, she was unharmed. Physically, at least.

While the shower helped relax your tense body, it didn't help much with the resurfacing memories. You were simply disassociating at a cracked shower tile until Emily took it upon herself to be your distraction in the shower.

And of course, it certainly helped.

And later on, the team did their best to talk about pretty much anything but the case. Not like you were really upset about that honestly.

Having the people who you cared about around you, that's what helped the most. Having your love by your side and having your family around you.

🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮🝮

Taglist: @v3nusxsky @just-your-casual-nerd @pebbleswritessometimes @bigolgay @scream-queenlover @darkth1ngs @hxzxrdous @sgelessoanddoveykissing

I feel like I’m forgetting a few people on my tag list so comment if you want to be a part of my updated tag list!

[whiteskullofroses]

Hi, can you do male-reader x Hans Landa? I liked the other Inglorious Bastards one you did but I'm a guy so can I have one where the reader is a guy? I would enjoy that. It can be anything, smut and angst are my top two.

A/n: Hi guys! I'm starting with answering your requests (finally). I hope you'll enjoy and thank you for the request❤️

Warnings: (you said you liked smut and angst, so I combined those two!) Smut, angst, swearing, cheating, jealousy.

I know what you did

(Hans Landa x Male!Reader)

Hans was pissed. He paced up and down the corridor leading to your office, not knowing how to approach the situation he was in. His blood boiled with anticipation, his throat dry, as he hasn't spoken a word to you or to anyone today.

Finally, after what felt like an internity of thinking, he knocked on your office door.

You lifted your head, having been snapped out of your thoughts filled with worry. Standing up from your chair, you gazed at the paperwork in front of you one last time before going to open the door.

Slowly turning the door handle and opening the door, your breath caught in your throat as you saw Hans in his uniform with a cigarette between his fingers.

"May I come in?" His words sharp and clear.

You looked at him with glassy eyes before finally letting him in, knowing you've been caught.

Hans made his way around your office desk, taking a seat in your chair. An almost empty bottle of whiskey stood on the desk, along with a half full glass. You had been drinking since you got to work, hoping it could calm your nerves down.

He took your glass and put it on his lips. The lips you once kissed, the lips that once praised and loved you, were now mute. Sipping on it and taking a long drag of his cigarette, his eyes scanned you. Hans cleared his throat and smiled at you.

"Was ist los mein Schatz?" The facade he put on his face startled you.

"Hans..." You took a deep breath and wiped the sweat off of your forehead.

The smile Hans put on suddenly vanished, an uncomfortable silence filling the air. Taking one last drag of his Sturm cigarette, he put it out on one of your papers on the desk. His eyes locked with yours the whole time. The fingers still on the cigarette as he spoke: "I know what you did."

Standing there, motionless and speechless, a shiver ran down your spine. The trust is...you didn't know what to say to him. Would apologising and begging him to not let you go be a good idea, or would it make you look like a pathetic dog begging for his love?

"Hans," your voice low and breathless, your voice just beyond a whisper: "My love, I'm sorry."

His words cut through yours: "Don't call me that."

He stood up and walked over to you, his face almost touching yours. Oh how much you missed him, his scent and his face. You wished he would kiss you, hold you and tell you that he loves you, but you got the exact opposite of what you wished for.

"Don't you dare ever call me that again!" The sudden yelling made you flinch.

"How dare you! How dare you throw my love out the window like that?" You could see what looked like tears forming in his eyes, to this moment, you've never seen him cry before.

"You were the only man I ever loved Y/N!"

Guilt flushed over you like a wave from the sea, you wanted to die seeing him like this. Seeing what you've done to him. To the two of you.

"You were the only man I had faith in! The only relationship I put so much time and effort into, just for you to treat me like trash on the street!" His hand pointing at your chest, his pointer finger pressing on it, so much to the point where it almost hurt.

"I don't ever, ever, want to see your face again," He spits out coldly: "even in hell, when you'll burn for what you've done, and I shall burn in the same lake of fire as you," Cutting you like paper with his words: "I'll drown in the lava to make sure," He pauses: "just to be absolutely sure, we never meet again."

With that he picks up his hat, leaves the room and shuts the door behind him.

You stood there, staring at the same spot where his eyes were just a moment ago. Your heart beating out of your chest, your eyes like pools of tears.

The truth is that the night before yesterday, you went to a nearby inn with your colleagues. After one too many drinks, you got caught up with one of the men a friend brought with him, things got feisty and the two of you ended up on each other's lips. You didn't know what you were doing, you couldn't resist as he was all over you. But little did you know that that man was also a friend of Hans', who told him all about how he made out at the Inn with a handsome man by the name of Y/N Y/L/N.

As you recall the night, you sit down on the couch, your legs shaking. Putting your hands on your face, you cry like a baby. Never in your life have you cried this hard.

You reached for the pack of cigarettes and light one, almost burning yourself.

"Scheiße." You whisper to yourself, when suddenly there's a knock at the door.

You quickly compose yourself, hiding great pain within yourself. Making a quick stop at the mirror, you see puffy eyes and messy hair. Quickly fixing up your hair, you open the door.

"Herr Y/L/N?" A young soldier asked.

"Yes? What is it?" You answer, curious about what he has to say. You notice he's holding a ticket in his hand, or more like an invitation.

"The local Theatre is premiering 'Stolz der Nation' on the 23rd. You're warmly invited." The boy hands you the ticket and smiles.

You try to fake a smile in return: "Danke, Junge." Shutting the door halfway before he speaks up again: "Oh, and rumour has it the Führer himself will be attending the premiere, wouldn't want to miss that, now would you?"

You hum gently at his statement and close the door on him. Not being in the mood to talk to anyone, you tossed the ticket on the desk and sunk back into your couch. Picking up the cigarette from the ashtray and taking a long drag, your life has hit its bottom.

You lost the man you loved, over some petty kissing in a bar with a man you barely knew. You felt dirty, you felt helpless. And that's how you ended the night, with you laying down on the couch, sleeping in your uniform like a homeless man on a bench.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

THE 23RD....

The past few days have been absolute hell for you. Waking up every morning without Hans in your arms, him making you coffee in the morning and telling you about his adventures and everything he has to do. To be honest, you were quite bored with yourself and with your own grief, over a man you lost out of your own lack of self control with alcohol. You were angry at yourself, chugging down bottle after bottle, smoking packs after packs of cigarettes and shedding a sea of tears.

Tonight is the planned premiere of that movie you didn't really have much interest in. You didn't have interest in anything anymore, it's like you've fallen into a dark hole of self-pity and sadness.

Although you felt unworthy of having a good time since you caused so much pain to Hans and yourself, you decided to visit the place and see if it was any good.

You put on your uniform and slicked your hair, the feeling of freshening up after so many days making you feel a little better as you barely got out of bed in the past week.

Just like that, you stormed out of your house on your way to the Theatre.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

One hour later...

You finally arrive at the Theatre. Your gaze meets some of your old friends, as you make your way to greet them you had to push some people out of the way as the place was so greatly crowded with hundreds of Germans officers and fancy dressed ladies.

As you make your way to the group, you can't help but think: "what if Hans is here?"

When your friend starts talking about Zoller and how great he is, something in your gut tells you to look up.

Hans.

Suddenly all the music stops, all the chatter quiets down, your friend's words disappear and everything stops. You stare up at him as if you've just witnessed a murder... Well there was murder, murder of your heart. It started bleeding as he looked down at you, with a champagne glass in his hand. As soon as the two of you make eye contact, someone hugs you over your shoulders.

It was him.

The guy who caused you so much pain. The guy who ruined your life. You leer at him with shook in your eyes, how casual he was with his touch made you almost puke in your mouth.

Holding your composure, trying not to choke the guy to his death right then and there, you slowly slipped out of his hold and took a step back, accidentally bumping into someone.

Turning around, you see Hans. His facial expression serious as he speaks: "Komm mit mir."

Your brain completely shuts off as you follow him to a private room. Hans locks it behind you and before you could do anything, presses you against the door.

He pulls out his gun and puts it against your head, breathless, he speaks: "I could kill you..." His voice no more than a whisper as he stands there, pinning you with his leg in between yours, your hands behind your back. "You dare hug that man one more time... I might actually do it, mein Schatz..."

He kisses you deeply, tasting the champagne on his tongue. You melt into the kiss, holding his face as you do so.

He leans into you, deeper in between your legs, his thigh pressed against your bulge. You moan out at the little friction, desperate to get more from him.

"So desperate, already?" He mocks your red cheeks and flustered expression, moving his thigh up and down against your hard on: "Like that, Schatz?"

You cry out at the sensation, having missed it so much: "Mhh, Hans please..." You plead him to take you, to claim you as his again.

"Say it. Tell me what you want." His moving stops, waiting for your voice to fill his ears with the words he wants to hear. The words he's wanted to hear for so long. Too long.

As you whimper out once more, he puts the gun to your neck and whispers, his voice husky and low: "Come on baby, you can do it."

He runs the gun down your torso and back up to your neck, feeling the cold metal against your skin, you manage to form a sentence: "Hans, take me...please..."

"Good boy, see?" He tosses your hat on the ground: "Wasn't so hard now, was it?" With that he presses another kiss to your lips, slowly stripping you naked in front of him.

Hans unzips his pants and pushes your head down with the gun still in his hand: "Let's see if you still know how to do it..."

So there you were, completely naked and harder than ever, on your knees.

You take his cock in your mouth and start sucking on the tip, then moving onto his whole length.

Hans throws his head back and takes a handful of your hair in his fist, not forceful but not gentle either.

"Oh..Y/N... Just... Just like that... O-Oh.." Hans murmurs out, throwing praises at you as you take him deep down your throat, sucking and stroking him at the same time, driving him absolutely insane.

Hans quickly feels himself getting to the edge, feeling like he could come at any moment, he decides to pull you back up.

"You're almost... Too good at that, I could come just with your pretty mouth."

He bends you over a table: "But where's the fun in that Schatzi?"

Using his precum from your blow job as lube, he pushes his hard cock in your ass, groaning out at the sensation: "You feel just as good as I remember..."

You moaned loudly as he stretched you out, his hand pushing you down on the table: "Ha-Hans...Ah!"

Hans smirks as he hears you moan out his name: "That's right baby, you're mine..."

He finally starts fucking you on the table, only a few meters away from the main hall, where everyone was gathered. His thrusts powerful, one hand on your back, the other on you hip, he groans out at how good and tight you feel around him.

His movements become faster and harder, you choke out all your words, unable to think straight as he fucked you good and hard.

He pulls you up by your hair, whispering sweet praises in your ear: "You're taking it so good for me, such a good boy..."

Eventually his thrusts and his voice traveling straight to your cock became too much, you had to release.

"I'm gonna...Oh!... Hans...I'm gonna come..." You confess to him, the words rolling off your tongue so smoothly as he urges you to do so: "Come for me Y/N, Come for me my love..."

As he fucked your ass, he took his hand off of your hip and on your cock, stroking you just the way you liked it.

Soon you come, harder than you've ever came, your head went spinning with pleasure, feeling him release inside of you with a low moan of your name.

"Hans...Oh... I missed this." You admit to him, as he lets you lean back on him and catch your breath: "Shh Y/N, I know you did, I know."

He turned you around and got some of your hair off of your forehead: "Let's go Schatzi, we wouldn't want to miss the movie."

THE END.

[melancholysway]

I don't remember how bad Raph's anger issues were in the 2007 film so this might be a little ooc

But could you do something with Raph and Leo are arguing over something, and Raph throws his sai at a wall

It hits the wall and they hear a yelp, both turn around in a panic

The sai barely missed Y/N who was just coming in the room so now they're like, "hah I'll just come back laterrr :')" <- stressed out by a near death experience

Thank you!

You can do whateverjust Leo's and Raph's reactions, or all of their reactions, or a fic, whatever you're vibing with

Aww! I got you :) I'm doing this as if you're either of the turtle's S/O! so you can choose which you'd want to read:)

TMNT 2007 Imagines: How Leo & Raph would react if you were almost hit

As Leonardo's S/O

Ah- guys- he's pissed

He just looks at his brother with such disappointment that it makes Raph feel even more guilty than he already is.

To be fair, you learned to never get involved when there was an argument between Leonardo and Raphael, you could get hurt- seriously hurt.

They don't mess around, they will physically fight- they give no fucks

But when it's announced that Leonardo will be leaving to South America for training, Raphael is fucking livid. He interrupts Leo's meditation session and rips him a new one.

"I can't believe ya wouldn't tell us! What happened to not keepin' secrets O' Fearless One?!"

Although it may not look like it, Raphael cares a lot about his older brother. So to see him up and leave like that pisses him off.

But, he has it all wrong. Leonardo didn't want to hurt him or his other brothers with the news.

So, they argue. What about you may ask? it's beyond me. All of this pent-up anger and frustration from both sides causes an all-out yelling war. While the others are doing their own thing, you can't help but intervene. The last thing you want is a fight to break out between your boyfriend and best friend.

Just as you walk in, Raph grunts in frustration and throws his sai- and if it wasn't for your instant reflexes, you would have been gone.

You duck quickly, and when you turn around, you see how his (extremely sharp) sai just sticks in the cement wall behind you. it's at this moment that you're so lucky to be alive.

It shakes you up, and you see Raph's amber eyes go wide, he didn't mean that- he didn't even know you were standing there.

"Shit, Y/n, I ain't kno-" "Raph!? What the shell!?"

Leo's PISSED. Raph could've killed you.

This causes more arguing, as Leo goes over to you and pries the sai from the wall- throwing it to the side and putting a protective arm in front of you and standing in the middle of you and Raphael.

But, you try and leave. You don't want to be in the middle of the feud. Not again. You can't take a side. You don't want to take a side. It's not your place.

"No y/n you stay right here- RAPH. Apologize. Now."

Will literally force a sorry out of Raph and will NOT let him go until he does.

Once he apologizes (Raph does feel bad, he seriously didn't mean to nearly cause you an early death, so the sorry comes quick,) he picks up his sai and leaves the dojo.

Leo stays and makes sure you're okay after that. It's natural, you're shaken up, you feel weak in the knees, the normal. You're in shock.

That seriously could've gone south quick, and Leo thinks about it for a split second. What if it did? He doesn't want to think about it anymore. It causes him to tear up.

Leo believes in parallel universes, in a different universe, you DID wind up getting stabbed. He could only imagine how is parallel self is handling it right now.

"Deep breaths, love, I'm sorry." Once you calm down, he helps you to his room, it's very clean and bare now, as he already packed essentials for his trip. But, his bed is still the same. Same scent and everything.

Once you're in his bed, he gets you some water, and then he lays beside you, holding you, comforting you.

He apologizes. Although you stop him and tell him he has nothing to apologize for, he doesn't care. He feels responsible. He should've been more attentive. He shouldn't have continued arguing with Raph. Maybe that would've never happened if he did.

You calm down as minutes go by, and Leo asks you (for the 1000th time) if you’re feeling okay.

“Thanks to you, I am.”

His heart soars at your response. He’s always glad to help you.

As Raphael's S/O

ooh does this boy feel like shit for doing that

It’s been a rough couple of weeks, especially finding out Leo will be leaving for god knows how long

So when he barges in the dojo one day and just starts going off on Leo- letting out all of his anger, it turns into a full blown argument

“I’m doing it for you, Raph! For our family!”

Raph doesn’t wanna hear it. He wants his brother HERE. In the sewers of NYC, not 3727228 miles away.

As Raph’s S/O, you understood why he got so angry at times. He was mad at the world around him. How imperfect it can truly be, and how it can turn upside down in an instant.

You had to understand Raph before you even thought about dating him- he’s a handful. He knows that, and he tries his best for you. You know he does.

You comfort him a lot. Like that day when Leo announced he would be leaving. He was feeling so many emotions and didn’t know what to do

So he started to dislike his brother. Like right now, how he just came in the dojo and started up an argument just because he can.

“We need ya here! I need ya here!” Doesn’t Leo understand that? But, it’s also Splinter’s orders. Leo has to go.

They continue to go back and forth, and from experience and observation- you know not to try and be the mediator. That was more Splinter’s thing. But, he wasn’t around. Nobody was. Just you as you just so happen to walk by.

But, you put all those conversations between Donnie and Mikey about what you should and shouldn’t do when Leo and Raph argue and go in there to try to at least dial it down.

Note: you should NOT tell both of them to shutup, they will literally forget they’re arguing with each other and come together and tell YOU to shutup and stay out of it (via Mikey)

Back to the current situation, you walk in and hear Raph’s accented voice get louder, and as you get closer to see them both, you also see something sharp fly right in your direction

After quickly ducking and yelping in the process, Raphael and Leonardo both stop and look at you.

Barely missed. And now? You’re sitting on the floor looking at them both.

Leonardo apologizes first. He should’ve been more aware of his surroundings and stopped Raph from almost decapitating you.

Your boyfriend, on the other hand, is shocked. He’s frozen in place, watching as Leo helps you get up, and soon leaving the dojo to get Donnie as you mention that you feel your heart racing.

“I’m fine, Leo, I’m just…” too late, he’s already gone.

Raphael truly fucked up, didn’t he? The last thing he would ever want to do is hurt you. You’re practically his everything. Who he tries to be a better person (err, turtle) for.

“Shit, babe, I’m so…fuck…I’m sorry,” once Raph gets himself out of that shocked state, he comes rushing to you, not even thinking about his sai that’s sticking out the wall.

He begins to ramble, that’s what he always did when he has no grasp on his emotions. He didn’t mean to do that. He had no idea you were there. He’s sorry, so fucking sorry. He knows he could’ve hurt you-he knows.

As you feel your heart rate go down as moments pass, you just embrace your boyfriend mid ramble. You hold him. You’re okay, and you have to tell him that.

“Hey, I’m okay, see?” You say while you bury your face in his plastron, “That reflex training you taught me finally came in handy, huh?” Raph isn’t sure what to do with his hands at first, but they soon wrap around your smaller form. How can you be so sweet to him when he almost took your head off?

He apologizes sincerely once again, but…it’s okay. Things happen. You knew Raphael wouldn’t do anything to hurt you intentionally. He’s not like that towards you. He cherishes you.

You cherish him all the same.

Leo comes back with Donnie, but you insist you’re okay. Which, you are. Raph and Leo end things bittersweetly, but what matters is that it’s over. They know not to fight to that extent. Raph understands now.

Raph’s still thinking hard about what he almost did to you, and it takes a lot of reassurance for him to see that you’re truly not angry or upset at him.

And once you’ve given Raphael that reassurance, he’s feeling better.

“You’re gonna have to try harder than that to get rid of me, Raphie.” You’re using his nickname again, you’re joking with him again like you usually do, and it makes him smile. It makes him love you even more, how you can get past his fuck ups with no hard feelings. He needs someone who understands.

You understand, and that’s what he loves about you.

//

taglist:

@bee-1n-space @ducky-died-inside

Masterlist

[tuiccim]

Relief Mission (Part 2 of 2)

Pairing: Bucky x Female!Reader

Word Count: 3.3k

Warnings: Mutual pining, flirt, and so much smut

Summary: The morning after and beyond.

A/N: Special thanks to my beta reader @whisperlullaby This one's for you @weekendgothgirl.

Part 1 of Relief Mission

You had no idea what time it was when it happened, probably the middle of the night. That strange sensation of falling hit you and you jerked awake to the realization that you were falling out of the bed. You had made yourself as small as possible, put yourself on the edge of the bed, to give Bucky room. Scrambling to keep yourself from hitting the floor, you feel a hand grab your waist and pull you back. Bucky fit your body to his in the small bed, burying his face in your neck. 

“Thanks,” you whisper, but there’s no answer from the man snuggling against you. “Bucky?” you try again but the only answer you receive is a moan as he flexes his hips more firmly into you. You bite your lip and debate what to do. You could try to extricate yourself but you imagine that the loose grip he holds is deceptive or maybe you just want it to be. You decide to stay where you are, it was where you wanted to be anyway. You smile as you fall back to sleep. 

The next morning, you wake with your face pressed to his chest, legs tangled with his, and your hands curled into his shirt. When a ray of light hits the one eye not shielded by his chest, you groan. 

“Piss off, sun. I’m not done with nighttime yet,” you mumble the sentiment, enjoying the feel of waking in someone’s arms. Bucky’s chest rumbles against your face. His laugh telling you he was awake and had heard you.

“Morning, doll,” he says quietly. You can hear the smile in his voice and bask in it for a moment.

“Mmm, morning. I know, I know. Gotta get up. Long drive,” you say mostly to yourself. 

“Five more minutes?” Bucky whispers. 

“I knew I liked you,” you smile as you nuzzle into his warmth. His arms tighten around you slightly. You fall into a hazy half-sleep, more comfortable than you should be with a man you barely knew. Rousing yourself a few minutes later, you take a deep breath, “Sorry,” you extricate yourself, sit on the edge of the bed, and grasp for words to explain why you were practically wrapped around him. “I, um… Thanks for saving me from hitting the floor last night,“ you say with a nervous little laugh. 

“What?” Bucky’s eyebrows knit together as he looks at you from where he’s still laid out on the bed.

“Last night?...” you read his confused expression and continue. “I almost fell out of the bed and you pulled me back. I, uh, guess you slept through the whole thing, huh?”

“Yeah, I guess,” Bucky scratches the back of his head. “I’m not surprised. I was probably crowding you.”

“No!,” you say too quickly. “Not at all. Anyway, we should get going. I’m going to change. My shirt should be dry by now. I’ll give your’s back.”

“No need, doll. Keep it. Looks-” Bucky cuts himself off.

“What?” you ask, curiously. 

“Nothing,” he shakes his head with a sheepish smile.

“No, it’s okay. What were you going to say?” 

“It, um, it looks better on you anyway,” Bucky quietly says and then stares, waiting for your reaction. 

“Oh,” you smile, heat creeping up your face. “Okay. Th-thanks. I’ll be out in just a minute.”

Bucky kicks himself as you scramble into the bathroom. His stupid mouth always seemed to run ahead of his brain around you. You probably thought he was an idiot. 

You stood in the bathroom for a minute and couldn’t stop smiling like an idiot. He was so adorable. Shaking yourself from your thoughts, you get ready quickly. You still had to get to the rendezvous point to join the rest of your team. 

The drive was long but it was as if a dam had broken between you and Bucky. Perhaps the shared intimacy of sleeping in each other's arms had made the awkwardness melt away. Whatever the reason, the polite conversation and long silences you had formerly shared with the metal-armed supersoldier had turned into laughs and getting to know each other. He was surprisingly funny and incredibly sweet. The stories he told were endearing. You even managed to make him laugh. He asked questions and listened to you prattle on. 

By the end of the drive, your attraction to him had become a full blown crush. However, there was no time to dwell on it as the team immediately went on to the next part of the mission. It was a few days before you were back home and settled down from the action. You were happy when Bucky sought you out more often after that. You spent time together, laughed, and just enjoyed each other. The only thing that was bothering you is that he had never made a move in the two weeks since that night. You were wondering if he just wanted to be friends. 

You had just closed your door after hanging out with the team for the night when there was a knock. Opening the door, you look curiously at Bucky as he leans against the doorjamb. 

“Hey. What's up?” you ask, your heart beating faster.

“Do you ever think about that morning? Waking up together?” Bucky looks at you. His eyes are filled with such tenderness and just a tinge of fear. 

“All the time. All the time,” you smile widely and pull him through the door.

He shuts it as he walks through and your heart soared as he wrapped you in his arms. You stared into each other's eyes, taking each other in and then the tension snapped. His lips found yours and he kissed you until you were dizzy. It was as if neither of you wanted to separate. When he finally pulls away, you smile at each other. 

“I’ve been wanting to do that for weeks,” Bucky says, his hand caressing your neck. 

“What took you so long?” you tease. 

“I’m a little out of practice at the whole dating thing,” Bucky chuckles while his cheeks tinge pink. 

“Does that mean you want to date me?" You bite your lip.

"Yeah, doll. Can I take you to dinner tomorrow?" Bucky asks, nervously.

"Why don't you take me to breakfast in the morning?" You raise an eyebrow.

"Uh, sure. If that's what you want. I'll see you in the morning," Bucky stutters in confusion. 

Realizing he hadn't taken your meaning, you decide to be a little more clear,  "Ya know, it's a long commute from my room to yours, maybe you'd like to just… stay the night?"

Biting your lip, you watch as realization dawns on Bucky's face. It's nearly comical. Sure, you were being forward but you'd practically walked around with a lady boner since that morning. Constantly hot and bothered from feeling him against you but nothing you did seemed to quell the ache. When Bucky stepped forward, his expression was full of wonder, as if he couldn't believe you had extended such an invitation.

He puts a hand on your neck and then pulls you to him for a kiss. You had expected it to be passionate as the one before had been but it was incredibly soft and tender. Your eyes flutter closed as you take in the moment. The feel of his lips, his hand caressing your neck, his metal arm going around your waist to pull you closer, and then suddenly, he breaks the kiss, bends down, and picks you up. You gasp as you put your arms around his neck and stare at him in surprise. Giving you a sweet smile, he walks to your bed and gently lays you on it. He follows you down, settling next to you before finding your lips again. His hands wander over your arms, your hips, your neck, as if he’s discovering you. Memorizing your curves and testing those spots that make you shudder. 

Taking some initiative, you put your leg over his and pull him closer. He rolls you under him, settling between your legs, and putting one hand under your shirt to feel your skin. You slide your hands under his shirt, feeling his warm skin, and push it up slowly. He takes the hint and leans back to pull it off. Running your hands over his chest, the ache between your legs becomes more pronounced. 

When you look into his face, he plucks at the hem of your shirt, the question in his eyes clear. You lift yourself up to help him pull it off and you’re a little surprised when he reaches behind your back and unclasps your bra with ease. He registers your surprised expression and pulls away. 

“I’m sorry. I should- I should’ve asked,” Bucky begins to stutter. 

You put your fingers to his lips and shake your head gently, “I was just surprised at how easily you did that. The answer’s yes.” You pull the bra off and throw it aside, immediately pulling him to you and enjoying the delicious warmth of his chest pressed to yours. You kiss his neck, dragging your tongue across the stubble there. 

Bucky shudders and whispers desperately, “Doll, I’m trying so hard to go slow.”

“Why?” You say against his skin, “You don’t have to go slow.”

“I don’t want to hurt you,” Bucky groans. 

You let out a little laugh, “I’m not fragile. You won’t hurt me, baby.” To drive home your point, you nip at his neck. And just like that, the dam is broken. Bucky presses you into the mattress, your hands intertwined as he kisses you with abandon. His hips flex into yours and you moan as you wrap your legs around him. He drags his lips down your neck and pays special attention to your breasts as he practically rips open the zipper on your jeans. You shimmy as he pulls them, along with your panties, down your legs and tosses them aside. He’s nearly feral as he pushes your legs apart as wide as he can, stretching your cunt open to him. His mouth attacks your clit and you arch. 

“Jesus! Fuck, Bucky! Oh my god!” Your words melt into moans as he fucks you with his tongue. You arch and keen with each motion over your clit. You grab handfuls of his hair as he eats you. It’s nearly too intense but you wouldn’t stop him to save your life. You’d never felt anything this incredible and it wasn’t long before you cried out, “I’m coming! Fuck! Oh, God, oh, God!” You were babbling as Bucky never even thought to stop or slow down. He kept going as if he’d never tasted anything as divine as you, as if his sole goal in life was to make you feel those incredible waves crash over you. He changed his angle and speed a second later and it had you building more quickly than you knew you could. You were bucking uncontrollably, chasing that friction he was creating, and then your body went taut, “Bucky! Baby, fuck! I- Ohhh!” Your voice died out as your whole body spasmed with the orgasm he had pulled from you. You felt like a ragdoll as you came back to yourself. You look down at Bucky where he’s watching you from between your legs, only his eyes visible as he slowly circles your clit. 

“Glad you aren’t fragile, doll. I’m not done yet,” Bucky smiles as he slides his fingers inside you and flicks his tongue more firmly against you. 

“Oh, fuck,” you moan, “I can take it.” 

You grab handfuls of the sheets as his fingers find that spot inside you and the feeling of his tongue pushes you higher. You still manage to push the words past your lips, “Just remember, I get to taste you next. Fuck, it’s gonna be so good.” You feel your cunt gush as you say the words and Bucky growls, sending vibrations through you. “That’s right, baby. Gonna suck that cock. Want to feel it hitting the back of my throat. Gonna make you weak, oh fuck, from my mouth. Bucky! I’m gonna-” you scream, you can’t stop yourself. The orgasm that rips through you is the most intense thing that you’ve ever felt. You ride it out, one hand in Bucky’s hair to hold him in place as the incredible aftershocks hit you. When Bucky’s tongue starts making those delicious circles again, you laugh as you pull his head away from you, “my turn, handsome.”

He crawls up your body and hovers above you for a moment, looking at your debauched expression, “You don’t have to, doll.”

You smile and reach up to touch his face before catching him off guard and flipping him under you. Hovering over him, you smile, “I want to.” You lean down to kiss him, tasting yourself on his lips and grinding your soaked pussy over his considerable bulge. Pulling back, you stare into his eyes as you slide down his body. You pull his sweatpants off and lick your lips as his length bobs in front of you. “Fuck, I’m going to enjoy this.” You wrap your hand around him and give a long lick across his tip. 

“Doll!” The heels of Bucky’s hands are pressed into his eye sockets as if he’s in the most pain… or pleasure of his life. 

“What is it, baby?” you tease, repeating the action. You swirl your tongue around his head as you watch his breathing pick up. 

“I can’t, I’m gonna explode,” he whimpers. 

“That’s kinda the point,” you smirk as you take him in your mouth, running your tongue along his underseam. 

“Jesus, doll, I’m serious! I don’t think I can hold myself back. It’s been too long. You feel fucking amazing,” Bucky moans. 

“Then don’t,” you say before sliding him back in. You fuck him with your mouth, sliding your tongue back and forth, pumping what you can’t fit with your hand, palming his balls, and moaning at the divine feel of him. You employ every trick you know to give him pleasure. He fists the sheets, breathing heavily, and tries not to buck his hips. 

“Doll, I’m gonna… Where- oh, fuck, Doll!” Bucky’s pleas end on a long moan as you slide him into your throat. You hold back your gag reflex as Bucky explodes, filling you with his spend. It’s almost too much but you manage to relax and swallow. His hands nearly shred your sheets. He was incredibly turned on that you would even do this for him but when you slid him all the way in and let him come down your throat, he didn’t think he’d stop coming. His balls tightened up harder than ever before and all he wanted was to make you feel as incredible. You slide him out carefully and move to curl up beside him. “I need more,” Bucky’s voice is gravelly. 

“Oh, sorry, of course,” you sit up to move back down the bed but don’t make it far.

“No,” Bucky says as he lifts you and sets you down with a knee on each side of his head. “Just like this,” he says, pulling you down to sit on his face. Grabbing hold of your headboard, you gasp as pleasure rolls through you. Bucky’s hands knead your ass as he flicks his tongue over your clit again and again. 

“Bucky!”

“Ride my face, doll. Come on, you deserve it after that little show you put on,” Bucky uses his grip on you to move you back and forth, encouraging you to take your pleasure from him. You’re tentative at first but then the pleasure rolls through you as you grind against his tongue. As you roll your hips, he moves his head back and forth adding to the friction. Twisting to look back, you see his cock hardening again and all you can think of is riding it rather than his face, letting him fill you up, and as the image runs through your mind, your cunt spasms.

“Fuck! Bucky! I need you! I need you inside me,” you say the words desperately as you scramble down his body. He’s still only semi-hard but you line him up with your entrance and sink down. “Oh, fuck, yes,” you whimper as you slowly move your hips, eyes rolling back in your head at the pure hedonism. 

Bucky grabs your hips, staring at where your two bodies meet, indulging in the fact that he’s finally buried inside you. “You feel amazing, doll. Fuck.”

“Bucky,” you moan as you feel him growing inside of you, stretching you, hitting deep. “Bucky, I can’t stop. It’s so good, so fucking good,” you babble as you build momentum. You grind your hips against him, pleasure building with each motion.

“I wanna see you come on top of me, doll. Look at me, look in my eyes and come all over my cock. I want to see you fall apart. Give it to me,” Bucky commands. 

“Oh, fuck,” you whine as your orgasm breaks over you. Staring into his eyes, your mouth forms an O as you lose yourself to the spasms. Your hips stutter and Bucky holds your face as he watches you. 

“I know, I know, babydoll. Good girl. You feel so good riding my cock. Just had to have it in you, huh? Couldn’t let me feel you come on my tongue one more time, you needed this cock inside you. Well, I hope you meant it when you said you weren’t fragile. We’re not done yet,” Bucky smiles cockily as he rolls you under him. He starts to move his hips in a slow rhythm, making you lift your knees to wrap your legs around him, arching to give him better access. 

Sex had never been this good. It had never felt like this. Never been this thorough and pleasurable. You were lost in it. Lost in him. He could do anything to you at this point and you would beg for more. 

“Bucky, Bucky, oh god, Bucky, please,” you moan. 

“Please what, doll?” Bucky murmurs in your ear. 

“More, harder, please!” you whine. 

“Good girl,” Bucky praises, “You want more, huh? Yeah, you need it, don’t you? Tell me.”

“I need it. Please, baby, I need more!”

Bucky pulls your legs up, throwing them over his shoulders and begins fucking into you with hard, fast strokes making you cry out. It was intense and you felt your cunt tightening around him.

“Yeah, that’s what my babydoll needed. Fuck, you feel good. You're squeezing me tight, taking me so good,” Bucky’s hands are everywhere, holding your hips, feathering over your nipples, caressing your neck. 

Your brain goes into complete overdrive between his hips driving into you relentlessly and the words of a sex god spilling out of his mouth. Fuck, it was just the first time and you were addicted to him already. You were gonna need a dose of him every day for the rest of your life. 

“Come on, doll. Come for me again. I’m so close but I need to feel you do that all over my cock again. Give it to me,” Bucky demands sweetly. 

“Ohhhh, fuuuck,” you whine as your orgasm slams through you. You nearly black out from the intensity but you will yourself to watch as Bucky loses himself to the fluttering of your cunt around him. His roar of pleasure as he emptied himself into you makes your cunt grip him even tighter. When he’s spent, he lowers your legs and gently lays down beside you. Pulling you against him, he kisses your neck and you smile. 

“See, not fragile at all,” you quip, still trying to catch your breath. 

“I hope not, doll. After all, this is just a break. We’re not done yet,” Bucky chuckles. 

Your eyes widen but, never one to back down from a challenge, you reply, “Barely started, baby.”

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~*Accidental mate. Chapter 7*~

Here’s the next instalment, apologies for the wait!

Ichigo had walked you to work after Grimmjow had whisked Urahara away as quick as he had appeared. You talked much about nothing, he explained what kind of training Rukia wanted to try with her new subordinates. You had asked how his family was, laughing loudly at the stories he told you about his father and his early morning wake up calls, or "goat face" as he referred to him.

By the way Ichigo kept looking around, scanning the surroundings and the way his hand kept creeping up the hilt of his zanpakuto, brushing the movement off as scratching at his head, you knew he was secretly only accompanying you to ensure Grimmjow didn't return. Not that you needed a body guard, you were more than capable to defend yourself, even if it was only long enough to wait for back up. For some reason though, you didn't think Grimmjow would hurt you, intentionally that is. His brash manor and short temper has landed you on your ass more than once.

Ichigo left you near the Captains quarters with a lazy wave, promising to pass on your greetings to the Captain of the thirteenth. After you had handed your report to Captain Kuchiki, waiting patiently for him to scan over it and answering the questions he had, you were dismissed. The morning had flown by without any issues, catching up on the paperwork you had missed on your mission and catching up with your colleagues who shared the office you were assigned.

Word had gotten around about the fight between Ichigo and Grimmjow, speculation and rumours spread around like wildfire. Honestly, the men in the division were the worst culprits for that. You had heard everything from Grimmjow loosing an arm to it being a passionate argument due to unrequited feelings between the pair. The later made you chuckle, they sure were creative with their stories. Your stomach begging to rumble let you know it was getting close to lunch, after you finished this last report you would go in search for food.

You heard the unnecessarily loud footsteps long before you saw the murderous looking face of Renji as he stormed into your office. Ah crap. You had forgotten to ask Ichigo to leave out your involvement in the altercation this morning when he retold the story to his friends, most importantly, Renji. He folded his arms over his chest as he came to a stop in front of your desk, holding you in a stern gaze

"everybody clear out. Take an early lunch" he spoke to the room at large without taking his eyes off of you, shrinking in your chair at his disapproving look. The ones you shared the office space with quickly packed up their belongings and all but ran from the room at the command of their lieutenant, sparing you a guilty look as they passed.

"That wasn't necessary, I was just about to head out for lunch" you told him freely now that you were alone, paying no attention to the correct way to address your superior during office hours now that there wasn't an audience. Renji was hard to gage when he was angry. You couldn't tell if he was angry with you, Grimmjow, or the whole situation. You pointedly ignore his glower, taking your time to sign your name on the last of your reports, tidily stacking the papers and putting them to the side

When you had finally stretched out all you could do, you relented with a sigh, meeting Renji's stern eyes "what can I do for you?"

"You can tell me what the hell that was this morning , and why I had to hear it from Ichigo and not you" Okay, seemed he was pissed at all thee. You didn't want to have to deal with this right now, you thought as you rubbed your eyes, suddenly feeling very tired.

"There was nothing to tell you. Ichigo and Grimmjow got into a fight, I tried to stop it and got knocked on my ass" you shrug to make light of the situation, why you were getting your ass chewed out for Grimmjows short temper was beyond you. You hadn't started or contributed to it at all. That seemingly wasn't enough for your over protective friend however "Grimmjow ran off with Urahara, Ichigo seemed fine after, if you want answers, ask them" 

"were you hurt?" His softness for you broke through his rough exterior, kind eyes quickly assessing what he could see of you as you verbalised your good health

"Im fine. I didn't get hurt at all, just tripped over my own feet" 

"Ichigo seems to think that Grimmjow attacked him because of you, said he was spouting some bullshit about him staying away from you"  Renji's tone turned questioning, with a subtle tone of "what the hell did you do?". That irked you, why were you suddenly to blame for their actions? You hadn't done anything. Simply wrong place, wrong time.

"Ichigo needs to get his head examined."  You grumbled, pushing your chair away from your desk to stand. The way Renji was looking over you made you feel like you were getting scolded. Standing didn't exactly do much for the height difference, he still towered over you. On your feet however, made you feel more in control of the situation.

"Don't give me that, you're hiding something from me" damn him. You've been friends for too long, he could read you like a book. You tilted your chin down, letting your hair help hide your face from him as you walk around your desk to open the office window. Anything to help hide the slight blush creeping up your cheeks

"I don't know what your talking about" you didn't even sound believable to your own ears at this point. You heard a bang behind you, whipping round startled by the loud noise. Renji had punched your desk in frustration, a lovely display of the fragile male ego. Idiot.

"don't lie to me YN, what aren't you telling me? Did he hurt you on that mission?"  How you wished he would just drop it. You were fine. Ichigo was fine. Grimmjow was... well, Grimmjow was an unhinged asshole, but he still had all his limbs attached, despite what the rumours were saying.

"I already told you he didn't"  you gave him a hardened look. You hated anyone calling you a lair, even if you weren't being completely forthcoming with the whole truth at this moment. There was a difference between straight out lying and holding back embarrassing information you didn't want getting around. As proved today, gossip spread like wildfire around here, and you weren't eager to be the next topic. "Please Renji, just drop it" 

"Fine". He said quietly. That was suspiciously too easy. Renji was like a dog with a bone when he had something in his head. Relentless in his pursuit for answers. He turned and walked towards the door, waving a hand over his shoulder in parting "I'll just go ask Grimmjow"

"wait!" God damn it. Renji stopped to face you, arms crossed over his chest expectantly. You crossed your own protectively, you already knew the reaction you were about to receive. With a defeated sigh, you finally let the proverbial cat out of the bag. "We slept together" 

an amusing amount of emotions passed over his face as he digested that piece of information, clearly the last thing he had expected to hear. The disgusted look that appeared on his face last and made its self comfortable immediately got you defensive. You weren't about to stand here and be judged. Sure. Grimmjow wasn't exactly your most proudest of moments, but you could've done a lot worse...have done worse. And so had Renji for that matter

"thats disgusting, YN, he's a hollow. " you knew that would be the issue. Though after spending time with Grimmjow, you didn't even see that anymore. Sure. He had a bone mask on half of his jaw and a hollow hole in his abdomen. Other than that though, he looked just like everyone else. Well, that was a lie. He looked better than most, he was handsome, in perfect physical condition. He had a dirty grin and strong hands and..what was your point again?

"I know what he is Renji. It was a mistake, a one time, things got out of hand, mistake. Everyone makes them. Even you. Or shall we go over all your sexual conquests?"  Your eyebrow raised challengingly. The one perk of Renji knowing you so well was that you knew him equally as well, including all of his less than ideal drunken fumbles with some very questionable people.

"Alright! I get it, no need to bring up that shit"  he grumbled defeated. His anger seemed to evaporate at your honesty, now that he knew for a fact he hadn't caused you any harm, he felt a whole lot less murderous. Though there was still something left unanswered "but if it was a one time thing, why was he so pissed at seeing you and Ichigo together?"

Why indeed. You haven't a clue, you were convinced Grimmjow hated the sight of you. He hadn't tried to befriend you after, nor indicate wanting to see you again. It was probably just some pathetic display of testosterone, trying to get one up over the guy he hated. "Your guess is as good as mine, we haven't spoken since we got back. I was under the impression we wouldn't be seeing each other again" 

"maybe he has feelings for you" 

"and maybe you were dropped on your head as a baby" you laugh at his absurd notion. Grimmjow having feelings, next joke. Your stomach rumbled again, reminding you that you were wasting time in your office and not satisfying your hunger. You walk over to Renji, linking your arm with his own and directed him to the door "come on, you can buy me lunch"

——————————————————

Grimmjow ran until his lungs burned. He ran until his legs were shaking with exhaustion, sweat coating his skin and then he ran some more. He ran from his fears, his responsibilities. He ran from his feelings and himself. Most of all, he ran as far away from you as he could until he fell to the ground covered in sweat. Panting hard, Grimmjow rolled to his back, closing his eyes against the burning sun waiting for his chest to stop heaving. Waiting for the uneasy weight in his chest to be lifted.

Grimmjow didn't want this, wasn't ready for this. He didn't have the first clue about actually being someone's alpha. He had only ever depended on himself, was only responsible for his own survival. Now he suddenly had a woman he was bound to, someone to take care of and provide for. The thought of it had him running away, how could he go back and face the reality? How? How had he bonded with someone who couldn't bond back. Why you? You with your weak body. You with your annoying remarks, your snappy wit.

Why you with your spellbinding attraction, your soft curvy body, your intoxicating moans. Grimmjow run his fingers though his hair, squeezing hard around the sweat soaked strands. What if you didn't want to be with him, how could he keep from going insane? Already he could feel the invisible pull, urging him to go back, to get you in his sights, in his arms. The unrelenting urgency he felt to make sure you were safe. Away from the threats you were unaware of.

You didn't know of the dangers, of the hidden monsters inside of a select few. Ichigo. Those captains. So ignorant to what those beasts could do to you, what they wanted to do to you. He shouldn't have bonded, he shouldn't have scent marked you. It put an invisible target on your back that you weren't aware of. A more horrifying thought though, what if you did want him back?

For all his confidence in himself, in his strength and his abilities, he was petrified at the notion of taking care of you. He didn't know about human relationships, what was expected of him, if he could even do it. The perverted hat wearing lunatic was rambling about flowers and walks. Was he expected to train you? Exercise you? And what the fuck were the flowers for?

He saw the way the shinigami looked at him, with hatred or disgust. They feared him, didn't want him around. He could deal with that, he didn't like them either. Grimmjow wasn't stupid, if you were with him, you'd get the same hate. The thought made him feel equally guilty and enraged at that fact. You didn't deserve hate for his past. What he had done under Aizens control still wasn't forgiven, even after all he did in the last war.

Grimmjow forced himself into a sit, looking out at the grassy field he had ended up in. There were no signs of life, just wide open space, freedom. That's everything he thought he always wanted, the freedom to go where he liked, do as he pleased. Ate because he was hungry, fucked because he was horny. Answering to no one, strong enough to not depend on anyone. Here it was, rolled out before him, his own personal paradise.

Yet that all seemed so unobtainable now. Everything was within his grasp, if only he could reach out and take it. His chest was tightening with yearning, his instincts demanding he return, find you, keep away those who intend to take what was his. Fighting against his desires to be free. He stood, looking out at the lush landscape. He needed to make a decision, here and now. Go back, give into his instincts and spend the rest of his life protecting you, providing for you. Even if you denied him, he would be there, silently watching over you. Or he could run. Keep moving, explore the land, find a place to claim as his own.

——————————————————

After lunch, and answering more questions than you ever would have thought Renji could come up with, you had returned to the office. Renji begrudgingly agreed to not go after Grimmjow at your request. You didn't want anymore arguing, and you certainly didn't want any more trouble landing at your doorstep. In return you had promised to tell Renji yourself if anything else happens. An easy promise to make, considering you probably wouldn't be seeing Grimmjow other than in passing, and the fact that Ichigo isn't around you all that often.

You had arrived back to the questioning of your colleagues of the reason for your lieutenants unusual visit. While they knew you two were friends, he didn't tend to abuse his position to get you alone. You fobbed them off with an excuse, he was stressed with paperwork and needed your help to catch up. You could tell they didn't believe you, but you weren't about to tell them all the truth. That your best friend was pissed that you had slept with an arrancar, who then proceeded to attack his other friend for no apparent reason.

The whole situation was absurd, you just wanted things to go back to normal. You enjoyed your life as a shinigami, took pride in your work. You loved going on missions, getting to see more of soul society than what was confined to these walls. You had friends with whom you had fun in your off time, shopping and drinking the night away. You were content. What you didn't want was some psychotic animal leaving a trail of destruction where ever you traveled. You didn't want to have to look over your shoulder every time you left your home incase said psychotic animal decided to attack the next innocent bystander you were conversing with.

Luckily the working day came to a quick end, time flying when in the company of your office mates. You had refused their offer to join them for food and drinks, instead returning home to make yourself dinner. Which was what you were currently doing, standing at your stove making a simple but delicious meal of sticky ginger pork and fluffy rice. Your home smelt heavenly, the sweet sticky sauce coating the pork you were cooking was mouthwatering. You sampled the meat, stifling a groan at the taste. It was ready.

Just as you had outed the flame a heavy knock sounded at your door. Perfect timing, you thought as you longingly glanced at your meal before making your way to your door. Another, more hurried knock sounded before you even left the kitchen, prompting you to hasten your steps. You pulled open your door partially, peaking around to investigate your insistent knocker, letting your door swing open fully at the sight of your unexpected guest.

"Grimmjow" you breathed his name. How the hell did he know where you lived? And more importantly, what was he doing here? Grimmjow looked increasingly uncomfortable, his eyes were downcast, avoiding looking at you directly. He had what appeared to be grass stains on his clothes, contrasting brilliantly against his stone coloured garb. In fact, he looked as haggard as his clothing. His hair was messily sticking out at odd angles as though he'd been dragged backwards through a hedge, or had run his fingers through it repeatedly at least "what are you..?"

"Here" Grimmjow muttered in a gruff tone, thrusting into your personal space his hand clutching too tightly around what appeared to be flowers. Wild flowers to be exact. Some of the stems were bent and more than half had missing petals. By the clumps of soil clinging to the exposed roots, it appeared Grimmjow had ripped them all from the ground himself, none to delicately. It was as sweet a gesture as it was a confusing one. Why did he get you flowers?

You took them carefully, attempting not to drop any of the poorly put together bouquet. Soil sprinkled to the ground at the change of hands, landing between you. Grimmjow avoided looking directly at you, silently cursing himself for listening to that crazy bastard. You didn't seem overjoyed, you looked baffled. If Urahara was just trying to make him look like a fool... there wasn't a place here nor the world of the living he could hide from Grimmjow's wrath.

You lent in slightly to inhale the sweet flowery aroma. Despite their appearance, they did smell beautiful. The thanks died on your tongue as Grimmjow forced himself pass you, inviting himself into your home, roughly shoving you out the way with his shoulder to make room for his large frame "please come in". You grumble quietly, closing the door to follow him. You busied yourself finding something to put the flowers in as Grimmjow scanned the area, picking up some of the ornaments you had scattered around to give the place a homely feel. He seemed particularly interested in your CD player, something you had acquired from the world of the living. While it wasn't illegal, it wasn't exactly encouraged to bring anything back.

Grimmjow looked around your den, you had so much useless crap here. The place smelt like you, everything had your scent lingering on its surface. He could smell something delicious wafting in from the kitchen, something sweet and meaty, reminding Grimmjow he hadn't eaten yet today, to busy having his world collapse around him. He felt awkward, uncomfortable here. He had gone over everything he had wanted to say on the way over here, rehearsing what he needed to tell you. Now that he was here, it all abandoned him. The urge to run away again was building.

Grimmjow wasn't a coward, and he was done running away. He was going to face his problem head on, the way any king should. He distracted himself with a strange black box he didn't know the function of. He poked it curiously, the raised circle he jabbed getting pushed down. Interesting. He discovered all the little raised circles sunk into the box when pressure was added, a lid opened when he pressed a particular one.

After placing the flowers in a long drinking glass and placing it in the centre of your table, you make your way over to Grimmjow to save your music player from his not so gentle probing. "Would you like me to turn it on?" Grimmjow ripped his hand away from the strange black box as though he hadn't just been pressing every button he could see. Distracted, he didn't hear your approach. He grunted noncommittally, careful not to show his interest.

You came to stand next to him, turning the player on and readjusting all the settings he had unknowingly messed up. Maybe music would relax him enough to spill the reason he had came. You didn't for a second think he had come over purely for your company. There had to be something he wanted. Grimmjow didn't seem the type to have friends, or want friendship for that matter. The thought made you a little sad. Everyone should have friends, experience the joy you yourself felt when in the company of those you held dear. Maybe you should try to be a little nicer to him.

Grimmjow cocked his head slightly when the box produced music. He had already experienced the different notes mixing together rhythmically. From the bars here in soul society and from Aizen himself. What you were playing though was better than what Aizen had listen to. It wasn't as sharp, didn't have those high screeching notes that made him want to rip his ears off. No this was deeper, with a low thump that made him feel his heart beat in sync with the beat.

"so, how can I help you?" You asked him, getting to the root of his surprise visit, you had an idea, as unbelievable as it may appear. Grimmjow reluctantly turned to you, swallowing harshly against the lump in his voice. Everything he had planned to say suddenly abandoned him, left him floundering with what to say. His mouth opened and closed a couple times, before growling in annoyance. You staring at him with your wide expectant eyes, head tilted adorably as you waited for him to speak. Maybe you weren't bad, as far as shinigami went. Pretty even.

"I need to tell you something" Grimmjow rushed out the sentence as you spoke your own. Over lapping with his, he almost missed it,almost "if you're here to apologise..?" 

Grimmjow stared at you, your words registering in his head. Apologise ? The fuck were you on about?

"Why the fuck would I apologise?" He snapped, getting immediately defensive. He's not even done anything yet! And he brought the bitch flowers! If that hat wearing freak told him that just to embarrass him, Grimmjow was going to kill him

"for this morning? Attacking Ichigo for no reason and shoving me to the ground in the process?" What the fuck. Grimmjows chest burned with unrestrained rage. Ichigo? ICHIGO?! That bastards name on your tongue had him seeing red. He was not about to loose you to him, no fucking way. Over Grimmjow's dead body. Grimmjow's arm snapped forward with an explosion of aggression, fist slamming into the wall between you. The plaster cracked and splintered around the gaping hole now left in your wall, dust billowing out around his shaking fist. The floor was littered with stone and plaster, along with your dresser and ornaments. His chest was heaving, pupils narrowed into slits as he glared at you

"Grimmjow!" It was one thing for the brute to invite himself into your home, it was another to punch a hole through your damn wall! Your own anger bubbled up, releasing in the form of a harsh shove against the mad man's chest "what the fuck is wrong with you! First Ichigo, now my wall, you." Your sentence ended with an abrupt squeal when Grimmjow growled, pinning you against the wall. Your wrists were trapped above your head, secure in his unbreakable hold. His large body pressed against yours, keeping you in place as his ragged breathing ghosted over your face.

You matched his energy, chest heaving with anger, shock, a little arousal... you tugged on your arms, testing the strength he used to hold you. You wouldn't be breaking free of him easily. You gave him your most serious glare, jutting your chin up defiantly. "Let me go asshole"

"That's the last time you are going to speak his name". Grimmjow growled warningly, low, deadly, inches from your face. "He can't have you" he barked, spitting with the ferocity he used to expel the words. His fingers tightened on your wrists, large hand easily wrapping around them both. His other took hold of your hip, pushing you further into his body. "You're mine"

"You don't own me Grimmjow, I can speak to whomever I decide" How had he even gotten it into his head that Ichigo wanted you? It was preposterous, absurd to even think that. Not only was Ichigo a child in comparison to you , he was also very happy with one Inoue Orihime. You didn't even know each other that well, spent hardly any time together, especially when not in the company of mutual friends. You weren't about to be dictated to, about who you could speak to. Not by Grimmjow, not by anyone.

"You are mine."  Grimmjow didn't even seem to hear you, intent on having is own moronic one sided conversation. His head dipped into the crook of your neck, inhaling deeply "my scent, my mark" you felt his tongue swipe up the side of your neck, nipping harshly just below your ear. You shuddered involuntarily, his hot breath cooling the wet stripe he had left sending a jolt of apprehension through you.

"He can't protect you like I can.." the seductive purr laced with malice whispering in your ear, thick with prideful certainty. His hand left your hip, pushing between your bodies to cup your hidden pussy, heel of his palm roughly grinding over your mound possessively, staking his claim. "Can't satisfy you like I can.."

Your body betrayed you, reacting favourably to his rough treatment. You felt heat pool between your legs, nipples hardening under your uniform. Your breasts heaved with every breath, no longer fulled by anger but arousal. The way he so easily dominated you, held you prisoner against his rock hard body, ignited your erogenous zone to life with his attention. All easily breaking your resolve, knees shaking with adrenaline, you struggled to remember why you were so adamant of not sleeping with him again.

"Grimmjow"  your voice was soft, pleading. When he pulled back to look you in your eyes, the shocking blue darkening with possessive desire, you surged forward with desperate haste, slamming your lips together with his in a hungry kiss. Grimmjow jerked back his head, confused by your actions. The fuck was that? A weak attempt of a head butt? His tongue swiped over his bottom lip, tasting your lingering sweet taste. His eye brows were furrowed, trying to decipher if you were trying to fight him or what?

You understood quickly, somehow you've become attuned to Grimmjow, understanding him more with each interaction. Not letting that conclusion deter you from what you were attempting to take. Grimmjow had probably never kissed anyone before, not as a hollow at least, not in the way you were used to . You had to speak his language, interact the way he knows. Grimmjow lived by a different set of rules and customs, you couldn't expect him to automatically know everything you did. Carefully you leaned in, arms straining against his hold, refusing to let you go. He held still, anticipating your next move, yet allowing you the freedom to try.

You nudged his jaw with your nose, softly, cautiously, before placing a small kiss there. You licked your way up his cheek, wetting the corner of his slightly parted lips. You each held still, breath mingling between you, heating the atmosphere surrounding you. Feeling safe that he wasn't about to bite, you lick your way across his lips, showing, explaining with actions. Pressing your lips firmly against his own. His language mixing with your own.

Luckily, Grimmjow was a quick learner. With lightening fast reflexes, reminiscent of his feline heritage, Grimmjow released your arms, wrapping his own around your thighs and throwing you up the wall, pinning you there with his hips. You wrap your arms around his thick neck, holding him as close to you as possible. Your back slammed into the cool wall behind you, Grimmjow grinding himself into your core as he brutally slammed his lips to yours.

There was nothing sensual or romantic in the way Grimmjow kissed you. It was brutal, and savage, ravishing your mouth with the intent to take. To claim. And you were all too willing to surrender. His bit at your bruising bottom lip with a sharp nip, taste of blood staining your mouth. He hungrily lapped over the swelling ache, catching the droplets of blood on his tongue before forcing it into your mouth. His fingers digged in painfully to your thighs keeping you in position as he earnestly thrust his hips, pressing his rapidly inflating cock against your pussy.

Your hips bucked erratically, searching for the stimulation, moaning into his mouth when you found it. Grimmjows tongue invaded your mouth, lavishly lapping at your tongue, tasting every inch of your mouth. It was messy and dirty, and so incredibly erotic. Fingers intertwining with his hair tightened, you tugged his head back, satisfied with a groan rumbling in his throat. You saw his eyes roll to the back of his head before his lids closed, surprisingly turned on by your own rough treatment.

You licked up his straining neck, his Adam's apple protruding nicely under the taunt skin. You graze your teeth over his skin, teasingly feigning your own bite when Grimmjow growled, snapping his darkened eyes to yours. Effortlessly he pulled you from the wall, carrying you blindly to your dining room table. With a rough swipe of his hand he sent the candles and placemats tumbling across your floor with heavy thuds, ripping the chair out of his way and letting it clatter to the floor noisily, so to easily spread your legs and claim his rightful place between them.

Grimmjow drank you in, the sight of you laid out beneath him, fire passionately burning in your eyes as you await his touch. The smell of your arousal flooding the room, the ghostly remnants of your tongue burning the side of his neck. He had gotten so swept away in his sudden rage, blinding lust that he almost forgotten why he had come here. For the first time since he was made aware of his bonding, he felt a spike of eagerness. Is this how it could be? Could you happily be mated to him, live your life under his protection, willingly spend your nights under him?

Grimmjow's libido was suddenly dowsed by the frigid, ice cold slap of uncertainty. Realisation dawning on him that he actually wanted this. Wanted you, by his side. A wave of nausea rippled through him at the thought. It was too much, too foreign, too new. His mouth dried suddenly, tongue feeling too large in his mouth as he watched you staring quizzically back at him with half hooded eyes.

Getting impatient your hands reached for him, tugging at his open top, attempting to shift him into motion. Grimmjow halted you with a grip on your wrist, he had to tell you before it got to far, had to explain before he got to immersed into the possibilities. "I won't be able to stop.." he voiced his discovery. If he had you again, now, he would always want you, wouldn't be able to let you go. If you refused his advances... he didn't know what he would be capable of.

You rolled your hips invitingly, brushing over his straining cock, deflating in its confines. You didn't understand the warning, you wanted this, wanted him inside you. "I know, just.. come on"you try to placate him, attempting to tug your hand away from his grasp to continue what had been started

"No, you don't understand " Grimmjow took hold of your other wandering hand, pinning them both at your sides as he leaned over you, needing to see your face when he told you the truth, understand the emotions on your face "you're not listening" 

"Grimmjow?.."you asked concerned at the sudden change. Where was the passion, the animalistic urgency you had come to associate with him? He looked worried, vulnerable, not something you had ever seen on his face. Your body relaxed, sexual tension snapping immediately. "What's wrong?" 

His hands gently squeezed around your wrists, tongue poking out to wet his suddenly dry lips. His chest heaved deeply, gathering all the courage he needed to speak the words "I.."

his head whipped around suddenly to the door, raspy protective growl vibrating in his chest. Before you had the chance to ask, a knock echoed through your home, alerting you to the presence outside that Grimmjow was already aware of.

"Damn" you sat up easily, Grimmjow stepping away from you. He almost looked relieved at the interruption, though his eyes never left your own. Another knock had you shifting the the edge of the table, easily sliding to your feet. "I'll go get rid of them.." you promised, touching his chest lightly as you passed "then we'll talk" 

You left Grimmjow in your living room, adjusting your uniform as you made it to the door. "Nezuko" You feigned shocked happiness as your neighbour stood awkwardly at your door, attempting to peer past you into your home "what can I do for you?"

"I heard banging, I just wanted to make sure everything was okay?" She asked you quietly, as though there was some foe hidden in your apartment listening in to your conversation. She was a sweet woman, if a little skittish. You smile warmly at her concern, hushing her worries

"Im fine, was just moving some furniture. I apologise for the noise"  a rush of relief washed over her face before offering you a sheepish smile. You ended the exchange as quickly as you could without being rude, promising a shopping trip in the near future, before closing the door and rushing back to where you left Grimmjow.

The space was empty, no sign of the whirlwind that had messed up your living space. "Grimmjow?" Your call echoed through your home, being met with silence. Carefully avoiding the mess on the floor, you sweep your home. Bathroom and office coming up empty you enter your bedroom, only to be met with the sight of your bedroom window open wide, curtains fluttering in the breeze forcing its way into the room.

[angelsworks]

Little Witch The last kingdom x reader

Chapter Six

Next Chapter -> H E R E

Series Masterlist -> Here

Type: Series

Summary: Sihtric tells the group what he saw, causing them to think about how they’ve treated you.

Warnings: 18 + Mature themes, crying.

Sihtric takes his time walking back to the alehouse. He feels conflicted. Before he was sent to spy on you he thought you a devilish witch. Despite saving Osferth, he was firm in his belief you were just like Skade. Doing things, good or bad, for your own secret plan.

He expected you to be consulting with some enemy of Uhtred.

He expected to uncover some plot against his friend.

He expected being able to walk back into the alehouse, smug and ready to fight. Ready to hunt you down and kill you.

He didn’t expect this.

To hear your sobs as they bounced off the alley walls. To watch as you slide down the wall, completely broken. To now have to go back to Uhtred and tell him something. But what? What would Uhtred do?

The woman you met with, Astrid, had practically told him everything he needed to know. Putting the pieces together he’d come to believe you were a seer, that much was true. Your parents had been killed. You were previously with a man named Steffen and you escaped. Now he hunts you down.

She also told you of your bond with Uhtred. To fortify your bond you would need to fuck. That didn’t surprise him.

In his experience, a lot of magic had been rooted in passion and lust. It was as strong a tool as hate and rage.

Each step he takes feels harder. He’s not a man of emotion, but feels a deep feeling emerge in his chest. Worry maybe? Worried of what Uhtred will do with this information. What he will do to you. Would he stand with Uhtred against you? Would he kill you for his friend, when he knew you had done no wrong?

No, he decided. If it came to that he would protect you. His moral compass was beyond dusty and rusty. Often ignoring it in favour of completing his assignment or mission. Here it didn’t feel right. His compass was spinning out of control. He couldn’t just ignore it. He couldn’t ignore you.

He found the rest of the group, still sat at the corner table in the alehouse. He realised how gloomy his face must look, yet couldn’t find the need to fix it. He felt gloom and oncoming doom. It felt wrong to share what he had heard. But Uhtred had to know.

He sits slowly on the bench. Stealing Osferths tanker and downing it in large gulps.

“I did not want to drink that ale anyway Sihtric.” Osferth tells the man in a snarky manner.

Uhtred looks at him expectantly. A smile on his face from a previous conversation. Ale has settled in his stomach and he feels it warm his skin.

Sihtric sighs and sits. Not sure where to start.

“Sihtric tell me, has my witch proved to be untrustworthy as we thought?” He laughs, clapping Sihtric on the back.

The others lean in, waiting for Sihtric to tell of what he saw.

“You need to let me finish what I say before you jump to conclusions Uhtred.” Sihtric finally speaks. Voice low to avoid their conversation being overheard.

Uhtred’s eyes narrow and his eyebrows furrow. His mood drops and he feels puzzled. Sihtric is not usually so cryptic. Finally he nods. Pulling his own head in so he can hear the man clearly.

“She did not go to piss as we thought. She met a woman - a Dane by the look of her - in an alleyway. The two embraced, seemed to be friends.” His words further Uhtred’s confusion. What would a witch like you be doing with another Dane.

“The Dane was sent from the ‘elder witches’ as I could gather. They spoke of your witch’s past and what she was doing now. They exchanged gifts and the Dane left.” Sihtric finishes.

“Is that all?” Finan asks, a little bewildered.

Sihtric relents. His bond to Uhtred is stronger to the one he feels to you. But he remains adamant he will protect you at all costs.

He sighs, “Her parents died recently. Then she was taken by a man called Steffen. From the malice in the Danes voice, he was not kind to the girl. He wants to break her bond with you Uhtred. Only mere days ago did she escape to find you.”

Uhtred contemplates Sihtric’s words. He struggles to remember a time he’s seen his friend so moved by something. He stays quiet, as Sihtric looks like he’s got books worth of things to say.

“The bond she shared to you is real according to this Dane. To break it the girl must lie with another man who is not you. To fortify her bond to you she must lie with you.”

Finan laughs, “You heard that Uhtred had a potential maiden to bed and didn’t bring her here.”

“No I did not,” Sihtric’s voice is hard. “While we speak she cries her soul out on the floor of an alley.”

No one says anything for a while. All quietly thinking.

Osferth thinks about how you came to them. Probably scared, terrified even. And how had they treated you? They tied you up. They didn’t even learn your name. He feels bad, more than that, guilty.

Finan shares Osferths feelings. He regrets every moment he spent glaring at you or making the sign of the cross when he’d touched you. He starts to look back on your time with them with new eyes. You didn’t struggle in your ropes, didn’t fight them when they tied you up. His thoughts lead him to wonder what else you had endured before reaching them.

Uhtred is at a loss to start with. He lost his wife, then jumped into bed with Skade, which turned out to be a terrible mistake. Now fate had lead him on a new path. A path that apparently involved you.

It made sense of course. He felt an odd connection to you. Whether that was master and seer or now something more. He wonders why you did not share with him your past before. More thinking leads him to realise why. He had treated you like Skade, when you were far from it. He didn’t even know your name, he hadn’t cared to ask.

Sihtric sees the silence as a confirmation of your fate, death perhaps. He speaks up finally, “If you plan to hurt this girl I will stand in your way. I am your friend but I will not kill a girl for simply living.”

Uhtred blinks, confused, “Sihtric there will be no killing of any girls. I know now I must treat her kinder. That is if we plan to keep her.” He tried to joke to lift the spirit of the group.

Sihtric sighs in relief. Glad he won’t need to do anything so drastic.

“Now, tell me which alley she sits.”

You don’t know how long you’d cried. Your eyes had ran dry to the point your sobs were empty shudders that racked your body. You were sure you were sending yourself into some sort of panic. So you tried to focus on the sounds of the street. Of the few people now walking in the square and the merchants packing up.

You took some deep breaths before getting up and wiping roughly at your eyes. Then wiping your hands down your dirty dress. You hid your dagger on your leg in its scabbard and the pot in one of your dress pockets.

You made your way to the centre of the square, trying to find your previous path to the alehouse. They’d undoubtedly know you’d been else where. From both your lack of flowers and tear stained eyes.

No matter, you had to return. You needed Uhtred, more than you’d like to admit. You need a master. For the years you’d seen Uhtred in visions, you knew at some point you would be together. Master and seer.

You just didn’t realise your relationship would turn down a road of romance.

Other seers at the covenant had told tales of their own previous masters. Some did indulge in lust and desire. They said it made their visions crystal clear. The visions weren’t restricted to dreams, they could happen anywhere.

But you didn’t know it was a requirement almost to keep your bond with Uhtred strong. To avoid losing your master. How would you even bring it up to him?

Lost in thought you don’t watch where you walk. Causing you to bump into someone, someone large and muscular. Before you can apologise the person had wrapped their arm around you, pinning you to their side.

Before you start to panic you take in their smell. Wood, leather and musk. Uhtred. Your body relaxes in his hold. Feeling at ease now. Whether you had to sleep in his bed or not, you knew you’d be safe with him.

“It seems you broke our agreement little witch.”

You try to come up with some response, a lie maybe to cover your tracks. Words fail you as you slump beside him.

“No matter, I look forward to sharing a bed together.” He tells you. His accent thick and words hushed as they land next to your ear.

“But first, we bathe.” The words have you twisting out of his hold. Trying to get away. It causes him to have to stop and turn to regain his grip on you.

“Are you scared of water witch?” He asks playfully, teasing. It’s strange to see him so comfortable with you.

“I don’t need to bathe Uhtred. I’ll sleep on the floor, I’ll wear new clothes. I just don’t need a bath.”

He sniffs your hair, “New clothes won’t clean your hair little witch. We will bathe. Do not worry, I will help.” His words do little to comfort you. Making your stomach twist with a strange sort of uncomfortable desire. Curiosity? Or something more.

You continue in silence. Not speaking about your fate of bathing. It’s not the bath so much you dislike. It’s the feeling you anticipate the water will awaken in your back. As water meets cut you know you’ll be reminded of what resides there. While the plan is improbable - to never bathe again. You are happy to try.

Uhtred has lost a wife already. He has been tricked by an evil witch and now he has been given you. Only to learn that you come to him broken and scared. After Sihtric’s words he feels a previously hidden need to both protect you and take care of you. Even if he has to coax and convince you in to doing it.

He leads you into a large building. An inn. Made of oak and stone with large torches lighting the inside. The room is warm when you step in. And quite, a peaceful kind.

After speaking briefly to a woman near the front of the Inn, you are shown upstairs to a room. She tells you your bath has been prepared in the next room over. A door leads you to the bath, so you do not have to emerge from your room.

When she closes the door it feels as though she takes the air with you. You stand nervously in the middle of the room. Arms folded around your chest, as you try to steady yourself.

“You bathe and return to me, understood?” You nod, moving swiftly to the bath in the other room. Shutting the door with more force than necessary.

The room is small and the steam from the water fills the room. The wooden bath tub is large and deep. Probably the largest you’ve seen. You briefly wonder how such a vast amount of water was brought up here.

You take a few moments to think of a plan.

You could make it look like you’d bathed. Wet your hair. Put your dress back on. Then go to bed.

A plan that sounded fool proof in your head was about to be anything but.

[lewkwoodnco]

Cruel Summer (Part 2) - Lockwood x Reader

A/N: continuation of the cruel summer fic! Also refer to the gif in the first part for the bit where Lockwood looks up at the reader :))

Chronological order: timeless cruel summer (pt 1, pt 2) august (tsitp version) the alcott

After much effort Lockwood had surprisingly managed to secure the agency invitations to the Fittes ball, even after the ruckus they had caused the previous year. He walked in and presented them with a flourish, practically skipping around the room.

“I don’t know how you managed it, but these are very much real,” said George, after examining them carefully. “Pity it was all for naught.”

“All for naught? Don’t be ridiculous.”

“I already told you before you left; I’ve looked over our plans and there is simply no way we can sneak past the guards swarming the place after the stunt we pulled last year.”

“Come off it, George, there has to be a way.”

“We can’t, not with them watching.”

Lucy broke in. “What if we don’t go? We can scale the walls, everyone else will be occupied at the ball, no one would even notice.”

“After I sold my soul for these tickets? Fat chance. Besides, Fittes would sniff it out if we don’t turn up.”

“As interesting as all this is,” she yawned, standing up, “I’m going up to get some rest.” She was still injured from her fall a few days back, and she hadn’t stopped wincing enough for Lockwood to let her come on any new missions. Part of her liked to think it was because he worried about her, and another part knew it was probably some sort of punishment for not being completely honest that night.

She was thinking of the puzzle she would break out while the rest went over to Fittes when she caught Lockwood’s eye. His expression was that infuriating mixture of daring and smugness that made her want to plant her face on his. He quirked a smile, and the shadows outlining his face made her breath catch, which she tried to pass off as a cough. For a man who prided himself on saintly values which bigger agencies lacked, it was remarkable how good being devilish looked on him.

“What? What?”

————————————————————————

“We’re going to get caught.”

“No, we won’t, because we all know what to do. So quit it.”

“I’m going to get caught. They’re going to take one look at me and head straight for the library.”

“Which would be fine, since we’re not going there anyway.”

“Then where?”

“Like I’d tell you, Miss Blab-a-mouth.”

“That’s just as well. I’m going to get piss-drunk and make a fool of myself.”

With that, she let out a desperate wail, burying her face in her hands while Lockwood unsympathetically walked around the room, collecting chains.

“No, you won’t, because there’ll be mocktails.”

“Just hurry, please?”

“We’ll be quick.” Lockwood stood up from the dusty corner he was huddled in with a little streak of dirt on his cheek. Without thinking, she reached out to wipe the dirt off, tracing his cheekbone delicately. His lips parted, and the ghost of whatever he was about to say hovered, but then they heard George’s footsteps getting closer, and they shifted away, the tension melting. All summer long, it was just one disappointment after another, she thought bitterly. She knew he felt something, he had to, but he would never admit it. It was irritating.

The plan was that only she would go to the ball, claiming the others had fallen terribly ill with chicken pox, and the only reason she was here was out of gratitude for the invitations. The others would go in, find what they needed, then signal her to leave to ‘check in on the poor things.’

They wanted to arouse as little suspicion as possible, so they rented a car instead of flagging down a cab this time. George was driving, scolding Lockwood for fiddling with the radio, who defensively insisted that he was ‘only playing around,’ which was more than enough entertainment for her and Lucy. But her laughter didn’t last long - Lockwood didn’t seem to know much beyond ‘playing around’ in general.

That must have been where the bitter feelings started. They parted ways at the back of the Fittes building, Lockwood winking at her as they started scaling the wall, but for once she didn’t feel all fluttery on the inside. It felt like a weak surge that fizzled out quicker than it had started, leaving behind the resentment brewing over the past couple of days, ever since that night at the library. Lockwood was so stupid, acting like he actually cared about her bruise, something she hadn’t been able to get him out of her head, something that made her want more with him. More than whatever two-step they engaged in, always dodging any real signs of affection or desire.

She had started with the mocktails, but they were too diluted to have any real sort of flavour. Besides, it just wasn’t doing it for her, not after the past couple of days she had, and so it was time for the cocktails. She had to pause occasionally to remind herself what signal she was supposed to be looking out for. Unfortunately for the poor waiter she had accosted, she began dumping all her emotional agony on him.

“Listen - Jeeves, is it? - imagine this hors d’œuvre is, say, the light in your life, the burning sunset you never want to end…”

As the night wore on, she grew drunker and drunker at such alarming speed that there was simply no room for suspicion towards Lockwood and Co. she had reached a point where her words had started to slur, not that it stopped her from talking the waiter’s ear off.

“His eyes, they shine like summer, or like that glint on the wall…”

The glint shifted back and forth sharply. It was almost too intentional for it to coincidentally look exactly the same as the signal they had agreed on.

“Oh-oh! Jeeves! I have to go! You did distract me with your chatter. Bye now!”

Jeeves glumly waved at her as she rushed down the narrow stairs, as mute as he was when he first sat down. She gripped onto the banister for dear life as the floor shifted below her feet. What felt like just a few seconds to her had apparently been a full half minute.

She didn’t exactly remember how she ended up in the car, just the relief of getting off the stairs and the panic that set in when the floor continued to swim, and suddenly she was in a cushy woollen seat with the blurry image of Lockwood on her left.

————————————————————————

“Wha- where’s everyone?”

“We had to split up in the end; George and Lucy exited on the other end of the building so they’re probably taking a cab from there.”

She nodded, trying to cool her rosy face with her hands, watching Lockwood drive out of the corner of her eye. That feverish feeling was back, and she was beginning to think Lockwood was some flu she could never recover from, a bad habit she didn’t even want to kick. He drove her crazy, and it was all his fault.

That’s all she’d ever to be to him - crazy.

It was like a dam broke, and she started sobbing a bit too noisily, sending Lockwood into a confused panic.

“Hey, hey, what’s wrong? Did something happen? Are you feeling okay?”

“I’m fine.” Her voice cracked even as she bit the lie out, as if Lockwood was forcing her to lie to him. But in a way, wasn’t he? He couldn’t expect her to just come right out and say it, could he? That just stressed her out even more, making her dissolve into more sobs.

The rest of the drive was silent but fraught with tension, interspersed with the occasional hiccup from her. When they finally pulled into the driveway, he switched off the engine and cut the headlights, but made no intimation to exit the car. She could almost see the balmy air outside, hear the cicadas chirping, a world so peaceful and happy - so very different from the world inside this car. She wished it was simple and easy and comfortable, but just looking at Lockwood was a stab in the gut.

“Okay, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

“You’ve been acting…off, lately.”

She rolled her eyes; it was so like him to be purposefully vague. Lockwood never was a man of details, just vague plans which tore her apart and always kept her waiting for him to cut deeper, say something that actually mattered.

“I don’t know what you mean. Off how? If you have something to say, then say it.”

He bristled. “Fine. I don’t like it when you lie to me.”

That was the last straw. She opened the car door and was through the gate, halfway up the stairs by the time Lockwood caught up to her.

“Y/N- wait! I didn’t mean it like that, you know it.”

“You think I’m just going to sit there and listen to you talk to me about lying?”

“Y/N, you’re being ridiculous.”

“You make my mouth dry and my head spin and you won’t even acknowledge it, but I’m ridiculous?”

Lockwood presses his lips together, but she was too far gone to stop now. Loving him was electrifying, terrifying and so, so cruel.

“I see the way you shrink, the way you return to whatever shell you’ve made for yourself the second things get too real. And I’m tired of it. I don’t want to keep secrets just to keep you. And maybe it’s my fault. Maybe I’m the one who sealed my fate when I started sneaking around with you, dancing around us. Loving from balconies, in the glow of vending machines, in the dark of the night…t’s exhausting and makes me delirious, but I’ll probably keep doing it anyway.”

And then there was nothing left to say, except for probably the worst thing. “There’s no other explanation. I love you, Lockwood.”