#you can only get baking soda from HELL

[mochinomnoms]

When you posted about twst not having the same foods it made my brain go... "what if their bf really tried to recreate the food based on description only"

Imagine Azul toiling away in the kitchen trying to re-create Bugals from scratch

Jade testing out different combinations of potions to recreate coca cola

Floyd trying to make the grandma candy that taste like strawberries

Jamil fighting with spices to make hot cheetos

Trey baking Twinkees and oatmeal cream pies

Lilia trying to make Macdonald fries but just creating poison

They all understand how food can help with homesickness and they want to do everything they can to help, even if it is trying to make something they have never had before

The ultimate love language is devoting time, money, and materials to recreated your lover's favorite foods. In our world, this could be going to your partner's parents or grandparents to learn their family recipe for a dish, cookie, drink, etc. Or it could be trying to look up a dish that they had growing up, but can't remember. Or maybe it's a cultural dish from their home country that they loved but haven't been able to have because the ingredients are available nearby. Painstakingly measuring, making, tasting, failing and failing over and over again to get it just right. Love is the ultimate love language.

So I think it's beautiful to imagine Azul trying to recreate your favorite dish based solely how you described how it looked, smelled, and tasted. Making the lounge's kitchen a mess until he can get it just right.

Trey calling his parents to describe the sweet treats and cookies you described. They're digging through their recipes so that he can combine and take what he needs to recreate them.

Jade has full confidence in his potion making skills, yet is dumped when you can only describe your favorite soda as "sugary and fizzy." He racks his brain over and over, taste testing the concoctions himself until he's positive they won't poison you, then bringing you into his little sessions to remake your favorite soda together.

Jamil, familiar with some spices and chilies you describe, but the others sound so otherworldly, messing around with the ingredients he's familiar with to make your favorite foods and snacks. He knows they'll never be the same, but that he they are good enough for you to want to stay.

Floyd is nothing if not determined. If he can't make you that candy you love so much, he's going into the ends of the earth to find you his world' equivalent. Don't question how he managed to get over a hundred different candies, some incredibly rare, others expensive as hell. His father has connections and money, it's nothing to spend on you.

And Lilia…well. He means well. It might be better to let him watch you make some of your favorite dishes, as well as you can when you're missing ingredients. He can watch and slowly start to understand, as you burn and hiss from the splattering oil, why food is a love language for humans too.

Food is a timeless love language. If it doesn't mean time and effort, it means money and sharing an experience that makes you happy. It's shared by nearly every culture, in your world and theirs, for a reason. Love is giving food when you're poor, love is the cuts and burns on your hands and arms, love is in the taste on your tongue, love is the smell you wake up to. Love is the effort, the time, the care. Love is food. And they love you.

[loserlvrss]

꒰ 𝐅𝐋𝐎𝐔𝐑 ꒱ 박지성

summary : baking cookies with your boyfriend, who doesn’t actually know how to bake, leads to him getting playful

genre : fluff, jisung x afab!reader tws : kissing, language (i said hell once oh no) author notes : what can i say~~ word count : 0.7k

“jisung! oh my god, you’re gonna hurt yourself.”

the man looked down at you, eyebrows furrowed, “it’s just a spoon…”

“yes — well, let me do it. can’t have my little baby getting hurt.” you pushed him away from the countertop, taking the wood spoon from his hand without protest. jisung was slightly shocked at your seriousness, however he let you carry out whatever was justified inside your head, giggling quietly.

he replied matter-of-factly, “you’re younger than me, y/n, and much shorter.” but you didn’t care about his truthful words. you liked to tease jisung, as he was easy to make blush.

“yeah, yeah, you’re welcome, i love you too. now, can you read the next instruction please?”

you looked to your big bowl of blended sugar, butter, eggs and vanilla, then to the smaller one of flour, baking powder, baking soda and salt.

“it says to start mixing in the flour gradually.” he summarized while looking awfully focused, lips pouted. "then we can cut out shapes."

“okay!” you turned to him, “can you pour a little in while i mix it together? i’ll tell you when to add more.”

he took the bowl within his large hands, watching as you began to mix the two contents little by little. you thought it was adorable how concentrated he was for you, knowing that he wasn’t the best cook or baker out there — he tried his best to do as the recipe said so they’d turn out decent and make you happy... and honestly, he just wanted to prompt a decorating competition once they had cooled.

"add the rest, ji."

your boyfriend did as you said, turning the bowl over so that the rest of the contents spilled out. you huffed a quiet laugh when some of it scattered on the counter, jisung trying to right the wrong by scooping it up with his hand.

he looked at you apologetically, "don't worry about it, baby." you began, pushing your finger into the contents and then swiping it across his nose. he was shocked at first, but then he smiled, just as you intended. "we need some flour on the counter anyways to roll them out."

he mimicked your actions, swiping his finger through the excess, grabbing you by your cheeks and then pressing it against your nose gently. he smiled so sweetly at you, you found it hard to not do the same.

you gave him a look as he stated, "now we're even." letting you go back to stirring the mixture.

"you're not even competitive, ji." you mumbled the last bit, "besides, i'd let you win." but he heard you loud and clear. and it sparked that non-competitiveness; that was really just playfulness disguised.

the next couple of seconds went by too quick for you to even comprehend, but as if your eyes were closed jisung had gotten a pinch of flour out of jar and tossed it in your direction. it scattered across your face, falling to your chest. maybe he couldn’t believe it either as his eyes grew, your features straight and scrunched up.

his hand remained in the air when your eyes did finally open; caught red handed like he wasn’t the only other person in your kitchen — and the bowl sure as hell didn’t do that to you.

you let the spoon fall against the edge of the glass, fully turning to face the man at your side. “jisung…”

he became flustered, apologizing while using his flour-filled fingers to wipe your cheeks. your boyfriend paused when your feigned anger broke, a giggle escaping your lips.

you grabbed some flour, a smile on your face as you backed the man against the counter, trapping him. he looked curiously, seemingly accepting his fate.

you brushed your hands together, pushing them against his black shirt and leaving handprints over his chest that caused you both to laugh. then, you grabbed his cheeks, pulling him down to your level; but just before you met, you stopped, lips centimeters apart.

you admired his closed eyes, features tinted pink like he had blush on, and slightly parted lips. you both knew that you could pull him apart by his seams, and that he’d gladly accept it.

jisung moved first, closing the gap easily. he gripped your waist, pressing your lower back to get you as close as he could. you knew there’d probably be a couple flour-fingerprints against your leggings, but you honestly found it funny, cracking a smile against his lips.

he broke away, slightly winded, and still holding you close. “can we finish? i want to cut out a meummwonbom shape.”

reblogs, likes and comments are greatly appreciated! thank u!

— perm tag list .ᐟ send an ask to be added c:

[saramelaniemoon]

♡ previous ♡ ♡ next ♡

Eddie has always been the agreedable one in his previous relationships.

This afternoon you showed up in the trailer with the cake like every Saturday. The day before, Eddie had been wondering what you were going to bake this time. Maybe a chocolate chip brownie or cheesecake or those little cinnamon cookies? All your pastries were delicious. However, when you took the cake out of the container, he froze.

Carrot cake. A cake made of carrots. The worst vegetable the world has ever seen. If it were human, it would be Jason Carver. Eddie was sure that the carrot was responsible for at least half of the evil in this world. Once, in his dream, it chased him with a roll of newspaper, beating him like a bug.

He knew it was a good boyfriend test day. You tried very hard baking that cake, mentioning that Eddie wasn't getting enough vitamins, which was obviously not true because he was getting all the vitamins he needed from the tomato sauce on the pizza. However, telling you about his distaste for this devil vegetable would make you sad, so he bravely decided to eat this carrot-tainted cake. Hardening a smile to his face, he ate mouthful after mouthful, praising your baking. Your smile only widened. In his imagination, Eddie was like a knight with a sword protecting you from all the sorrows of the world. He was going to eat even another piece for you. Well, maybe next time. After eating a large portion, he thanked you and you both went to his room to watch the horror movie Steve had recommended for you.

***

He never complained about anything and agreed to everything, which is why he didn't understand how your first quarrel happened. It all started when you came back from the kitchen with two cans of soda.

- Eddie bear, why was Wayne surprised you ate the carrot cake I made?

- I don't know what the old man meant sweetheart.

- He said you blame carrots for all the evil in this world.

- It's a dramatic exaggeration.

- And that's why it sounds like something you said. Babe, why didn't you just tell me you don't like it?

- I don't understand why you're mad. I didn't mean to upset you.

- Eddie, you don't have to pretend that everything suits you. I won't be mad that you don't like something I made. I'll be mad that you're forcing yourself to eat it because of me. Promise me you won't make me happy at your expense ever again.

- I cannot promise you that darling. I'd even eat peas for you. And peas are not vegetables but plants from hell.

- Eddie...

- Okay, I promise if I don't like something, I won't force myself to eat it. But what about the rest of the cake?

- Don't worry, I saw Wayne took care of that.

- Not surprised. This man would eat anything after his shift.

- Hey! It wasn't that bad! But you'll be okay with beetroot cake, right? - you tested him.

- Sweetheart, we need to discuss your making vegetable cakes problem - Eddie said starting to tickle you.

***

The next week, you surprised him with a giant carrot-shaped brownie that didn't have any veggies in it. Better to eat such vegetables than none at all.

♡ next ♡

*traumatized Eddie boy after waking up from being chased by carrot*

[elvensorceress]

tuesday teases

Haven’t been around in a million years but the show baited me with delicious Eddie angst. So. Hello lovely little gay people in my phone. Would you like some Tuesday fic teases?

@tizniz @hippolotamus @chaosandwolves @inell @smilingbuckley @spotsandsocks @daffi-990 @exhuastedpigeon @blutterlie @thelikesofus @ronordmann @dr-shortsighted-owl @lovecolibri @eddiebabygirldiaz @fiona-fififi @thekristen999

Here’s the ridiculous boys after the realtor phone call meeting…

“She probably wasn’t thinking anything one way or the other. She’s just focused on her job and finding us— me. Me, technically. A house.”

No. Not just Eddie. Their house. It would be theirs. Even if Buck isn’t there. Even if he never steps one foot into it. Eddie’s home is still Buck’s home. That won’t change. Ever.

But he can’t say that. How does he say that?

He gets up from the couch and grabs his empty mug. “You still want to make snickerdoodles? Or some other cookie? Or, what did you call it? Cake masquerading as loaf bread?” Eddie doesn’t wait for an answer. He goes into the kitchen and gets out the stash of flour he’s recently acquired.

He stocked up. Just in case. Can’t have the alternative of Buck without his baking.

Eddie sets one of the ten pound bags on the counter then grabs a pack of butter and the carton of eggs from the fridge and finds the measuring cups and spoons in their drawer. The basket Buck made years ago during quarantine is next. It holds the vanilla, the baking powder and soda, various flavored extracts, finishing salt, molasses, packets of instant yeast, chocolate chips, other baking essentials. He takes the jar of cinnamon from the spice rack in the cupboard, goes to put it with everything, but finds Buck staring from the kitchen doorway.

He looks too wistful. Too heartbroken. And all Eddie can offer is a kitchen and ingredients. He doesn’t have anything else.

Was it really that much of a loss? They were only together for six months. Did Buck really want to spend his life with the guy? It couldn’t have been that serious. It never is.

None of the people Buck’s dated are good enough for him.

Maybe Buck isn’t thinking of his ex right now. Maybe he’s thinking about the kid who was like a son to him.

Or the whole Eddie moving to El Paso thing. He seems fine, for the most part. He’s helping. But that’s what Buck does. He helps. He supports. Even when he shouldn’t.

But Buck has bad relationships to get over. He’s not really thinking about Eddie or Eddie’s problems. He’s focusing on a task so that his mind doesn’t wander where it shouldn’t.

Buck would be fine without Eddie. Hell, he’s probably better off. Or he will be.

Eddie asks too much of him. He takes up too much of Buck's time with his issues.

Eddie looks through the little stock pile he’s put together. “Anything else you need?”

Buck looks, stands beside him, and answers, “Sugar?”

Sugar.

Eddie’s stomach twists. It’s not a pet name. It’s an answer. Not a term of endearment. Answer. And of course it slipped Eddie’s mind. Why wouldn’t something that huge and essential be missing from his offering. He should have some though. Buried in the back of the pantry. He finds white, brown, and confectioner’s, and adds them to the supply. “All yours. Whatever you want to make. I’ll run to the store and get more if you need anything. We should have plenty of flour though. I got you five bags.”

Buck’s head snaps toward him. “Five bags? You got me five bags of flour? Like, two pound ones, right? Or the five pounders?”

Eddie shakes his head and gestures. “No, the tens. Like that one.”

“You bought me fifty pounds of flour?”

“Well, you’re the one who decided his coping mechanism was snickerdoodles and sourdough. I’m just being supportive. Since you’re my wingman and I’m yours or whatever you said when you stole my tablet and my realtor call.”

Buck huffs but smirks. “More like saved your call.”

More like saved Eddie’s everything but who’s counting?

[extreme-fatboy100]

Can you imagine what it'd be like to have a moment of clarity, rubbing your eyes as you look away from your computer screen for what has to be the first time in days?

Looking down at your fat-laden body. You can't even see your lap, covered by a curtain of lard, what used to be your belly is now just a shelf of wobbling, fat-flesh. And your moobs have never been bigger, sloping off to the sides and hanging down. Your body hair is greasy and matted, your gut covered in crumbs and smeared in sauces too numerous to count. Your ass and hips have grown too wide for the chair, the arms pinching and keeping you trapped. It'd take more energy, more strength than you have in your arms and legs to get you unstuck now. There has to be a point where your stationary life causes you to fuse with the chair beneath you and it can't be that far off.

Your neck aches from not having moved in a while as you turn your head, feeling the folds in your double chin rub against each other. Your room is a disaster. There's a mountain of empty soda bottles and crumpled wrappers around you and scattered all around the room. Just trying to get to the door without tripping over the empty energy drink cans is an impossible task for a dozen different reasons. You've been baked in it so long that you don't notice right away, but eventually the smell hits you. Fucking hell, your room smells like rotting garbage. There must be some food crumbs or spilled milkshake somewhere. Or it could be you, rotting away in your chair.

Your body is heavy. It's hard to breathe. It's hard to keep your eyes open. But even as you survey the damage done to your room, your body, your life...

It only makes you hungry.

ughhhh,, it would make me so hungry,, spot on anon gonna go get off now ✨

[jessamine-rose]

ʚ✿⚘ Forbidden Fruit ⚘✿ɞ

Welp I was very busy this Kinktober thanks to WHB. More headcanons, anyone?? (*-`ω´- )

Characters:: Bathin, Marbas, Barbatos, Naberius, Satan, Zagan, Astaroth

Note:: Nsfw, pls take note of each character’s paraphilia before reading, MINORS DNI

♡ Bathin usually travels alone, but he is always open to your company. He will prioritize scenic routes and hidden gems, anything to make your journey more exciting. Once the moon rises, the two of you can take evening strolls, compare the night sky to Niflheim’s, and savor each other’s presence in an otherwise unfamiliar place. Not to mention the hours spent in your hotel room—there is a reason why you always share a bed.

♡ Technically, Marbas can undo his restraints during meals, but that hasn’t stopped you from offering your help. Hand-feeding him takes less time, after all, especially with candy or fruit. And it means you can tease him by sitting on his lap, tracing his lips for stray crumbs, getting your fingers sticky with his favorite strawberry caramel. Neither can he stop you when you pull him into a sweet kiss, slipping an aphrodisiac into his mouth~

♡ Barbatos likes to see you at different times of the day. Noon, illuminated in radiant sunshine. Sunset, colored in light and shadow. Night, when your visage is painted in the soft shades of borrowed sunlight. In return for indulging his kink, he will be the one to provide sunscreen and thoroughly apply it to your skin. Now he just needs to coax you into sunbathing with him; the both of you would look beautiful against the roses.

♡ Naberius is weak to pet play. There are many ways to rile him up, from soft headpats to harsh commands to a personalized collar engraved with your initials. And what is the best form of control if not Pavlovian conditioning? All it takes is the sound of his name spoken in your voice, in a stern tone used only during sex, for his animalistic urges to take over. “Hey, Naberius, have you forgotten who your owner is? …Oh? That’s my good boy~”

♡ The easiest way to end an argument with Satan is through makeup sex. Depending on the seriousness of the issue, he can’t help but feel turned on by your wrath—directed at him, no less. He hasn’t even apologized before you’re already at his throat, a slap to his face followed by a passionate kiss. To which he smiles and kisses you back, biting your lip hard enough to draw blood. You truly are an interesting human~

♡ Zagan is attentive to your physical mannerisms, which makes it easy for him to gauge your emotions. Every shudder, every flicker of discomfort, spurs him to stop moving and ask if you’re okay, if you need a breather, if he has failed as your lover. Do reassure him, won’t you? His skill is also useful during workouts! He will examine your form, manually adjust your body, and, in a shy voice, propose a final exercise in his bedroom.

♡ Astaroth’s favorite pastime is to read a book while you cockwarm him. The experience can only be described as your personal hell—fleeting touches, the spikes of his leg harness, his velvety voice narrating a tale of dark romance. How long will your patience last? Has corruption ever tasted this sweet? Don’t worry, he promises to reward you once the story is over. A beautiful rose is not without thorns, just like the flowers tainted by original sin.

♡

Still hornii?? Read my other WHB fics <3

Cheers to Marbas and Astaroth getting more headcanons after Dance with the Devil. Can y’all tell how thirsty I was when I wrote their parts?? Huhuhu _:(´ཀ`」 ∠):

Special thanks to @diodellet for beta-reading this and rejuvenating me with your reaction to Naberius. And to my beloved readers, do rot in the tags/ comments and tell me which devil was your favorite. I cherish your feedback <3

Tag a WHB enjoyer!! @sparkbeast20 @2af-afterdark @dreamii-yume @yanmaresu @pinkaditty @h2o2-and-baking-soda @paradivis @gr0tesquerom4ntica @dobaekki @obeythisass @beelsjuicytitties @binar-es @ushitoshii @sulumuns-dootah @devilmen-collector @jazeswhbvault

[livwritesstuff]

Mid-bath, I realised that Eddie and Steve had daughters during Lush’s peak popularity with the bathbombs and bubble bars, the themed releases (especially for Halloween). How did that go?

omg as a mid-2010s adolescent who *loved* watching lush hauls (Zoella's specifically and that's someone I hadn't thought about in a bazillion years), I cannot believe I didn't think of this sooner

Okay, but I see your Lush, and I raise you this:

The mall closest to their town in Massachusetts (the epic Natick Mall for any fellow New Englanders) just so happens to separate the Lush and the Bath and Body Works by just two (2) stores.

Add a Yankee Candle to that shit and you’ve got a brand new circle of hell – that’s Eddie’s opinion anyways, and he’d be the one to know given how Steve pulls the migraine card every time the girls lobby for a trip to the mall.

Like most adolescent girls in the mid-2010s, Moe, Robbie, and Hazel love Lush and they love Bath and Body works, so it’s a given that they’ll be building time for both into their mall adventure.

For Eddie, it’s his least favorite part of an already not-so-enjoyable experience, because, yeah, one of those bath bombs or whatever might smell nice on its own, but a hundred thousand of the fuckers crammed into a store with less square footage than the entryway of his and Steve’s house…that’s gotta be some form of prison torture (and if it’s not, it should be).

Eventually, Eddie just sets them loose for that portion of their shopping trip, which Steve might not necessarily approve of (but what Steve doesn’t know can’t hurt him, and those two stores back to back definitely would hurt Eddie).

“Do not lose Hazel,” he tells Robbie and Moe, deadly serious even though Hazel is almost ten and the risk of losing her in a real way is getting slimmer and slimmer, “If you are not walking into the bookstore in exactly thirty minutes, I will send a mall cop in to bring you to me the long way. Through the food court where all the kids from your school will be. Capiche?”

The system works – the girls get to spend their dads’ money on over-scented garbage and Eddie gets to retain his sense of smell and his sanity – but it’s only half the battle. The second half takes place at home, in the upstairs bathroom that all three girls share.

“Hazel!,” they hear Moe yell, “That one was mine!”

Steve shoots Eddie a look, as if to say that’s all you, man.

“C’mon, Stevie,” he protests, “I broke up the last one about the stupid hand sanitizers.”

“Nope. You facilitated buying them that shit. You can deal with it.”

Right on cue, they hear Hazel upstairs start to cry. Eddie groans, gets to his feet, and heads upstairs.

Indeed, Hazel is sobbing, because she almost always is these days (Steve and Eddie secretly joke that she’d never cried as a baby because she was stock-piling it all for her elementary-school days), and wrapped in an elephant towel (there’s a hood with ears and everything; it’s very cute). Moe is holding a half-dissolved bath bomb that she’d clearly just fished out of the bathtub and wearing an unreasonably irate expression for what is ultimately just a glorified ball of baking soda and citric acid (Eddie looked it up).

“Dad – Hazel’s using my bath bomb.”

“It’s not yours!” Hazel hiccups.

Eddie squints at the deformed mess fizzing in Moe’s hand.

“I gotta side with Hazy here, Moe. I mean – c’mon. Did you actually want a Santa Claus-shaped bath bomb? Really?”

“Yeah,” she insists, “It’s limited edition, Dad. For the holiday collection.”

Eddie lets out a long sigh.

“Okay,” he says, “You guys are keeping this shit in your own rooms. Starting now.”

[vxm1tcxre]

Lemme take a moment to deromanticize 3ds, if you don’t mind.

I have severe bul1m14. for years now, I have been trying to quit bping, only to get progressively worse as time has gone on- to the point where I get lucky if I make it through a single day without binging and pvrging once. On bad days, I will do so up to 5 times. Hell, I even have ever-so-slight bruising on my knees from spending so much time kneeling in front of bags and toilets, among countless other symptoms and places where my 3d has left it’s ugly mark.

Today was my birthday party. A celebration of my life. I had friends over. We visited a fun place in my city. They gave me gifts and we played games.

And did I get to enjoy it? Did I get to have fun with my friends and appreciate spending time with the people I love? Was it a good day? Will I remember it as such?

Of course not.

Like clockwork, I b1ng3d on the pizza and cupcakes my mom bought for me and my friends. I have consumed approximately 4800+ c4lories in a single day.

I have spent the last three hours after my friends went home locked in my room, trying to pvrge, but since I have abused my body so much, my gag reflex barely works. All I managed was to cough and choke up thick, viscous mucus and tiny chunks of pizza crust.

I am so full I can’t move without excruciating pain. I swear I can feel my bloated stomach pressing against my ribs, pushing them out. It feels like I’m about to explode. I want nothing more than to v0m1t- not only because I fear the weight gain, barely at this point. But because I am in such excruciating, unbearable pain and I just want this alien invader of carbs and sugar out of my damn body.

I have shoved an extension cord, the eraser end of a pencil, and the dirty toothbrush with bite marks on the handle from exclusively using it as my tool to pvrge because my fingers no longer suffice as far as they can possibly go down my throat to try and get some relief. Nothing.

I swallowed 3 heaping spoonfuls of baking soda and chugged seltzer water to try and give myself sodium poisoning.

I swallowed about 8 of my adhd pills and whatever antidepressants I had left, hoping they’d make me sick and push the food out of my stomach.

Nothing has worked. I am sitting in my bathroom, because I can’t lie down without acid flooding my esophagus, and praying that my stomach doesn’t burst open from the sheer volume of food I’ve shoved inside myself, begging the universe to not let me die.

I don’t want to die curled on the bathroom floor around my horrendously distended stomach, next to the scale I’m terrified to have to step on tomorrow morning. I don’t want my heartbroken parents to look through my things after I’m gone and find the bags of cold, rotten v0m1t hidden around my room.

Today was my fucking birthday party.

And instead of looking back fondly at this day, looking forward for things to come, I’m crying on my bathroom floor because I’m so fucking f4t and in so much pain I wish I could just sl1c3 my stomach open to remove a single ounce of the pressure against my insides.

But I can’t.

It will never stop.

I will never be able to enjoy days like these.

[surshica]

TYSM FOR MESMERIZED IT WAS SO CUTE RAHHHH🙏🏽🙏🏽

okay okay so can i request chishiya x like a very small reader? like short asf yknow? like 5,0 or something

ok thats all ilysm♡︎

SHORTCAKE !

request : chishiya x gn!short reader

genre : cavity sugar rush fluff

A/N : short king with a short reader?? hell yeah!! i’m also somewhat short (dare i say as i’m 5’4 almost 5’5). like its giving short power couple and IM HERE FOR IT. reader will be like 5’0, also this isn’t proof read or anything SOOO..

— CHISHIYA x GN!SHORT READER

ılıl﹔ ◌ 𓂂 ˳⁺ 🍰 ꯭ ⊹ ⋆ ࣪

“chishiya can you grab something from the top shelf for me please” you stood on your tippie toes but the itim felt ad if it kept getting farther and farther away, the slight huff in annoyance escaped your lips as you hear chishiya snicker at you.

“i dont even know why you are laughing shuntaro.” your voice came out cold, “youre not much taller then me..” you side-eyed the dyed blonde. he had a stupid cheshire like smile on his face. “i may not be 6’1 but im still taller.” he cheekily smiled at you.

you smiled at him pointing towards the, “flour.” it was soft yet stern tone with a smile plastered on your face; “mmm i wouldn’t say i liked the way you asked me for the flour.” he had his hands in his pockets looking down at you. “this is kind of embarrassing,” you blinked multiple times while your lips formed a downward frown, “whats embarrassing? me looking down at you or you not being able to get some simple flour?” a chuckle stifled out his lips.

“maybe both, i just wanted some flour and tall king chishiya can’t get it.” a sarcastic dreamy sigh left your lips. chishiya rolled his eyes reaching up to grab you the flour. he handed you the box of flour while furrowing his eyebrows— “what do you even need this flour for? you aren’t baking anything..” he grabbed a pack of cookies from the pantry before closing it and leaning againts the pantry door.

“i didnt need it!” you held your hands behind your back, “i just wanted to see if you would reach for it.” he gave you a bore look, as if it was telling you that you can put the flour back yourself. “you’re so random.”

“WELL i just wanted your attention” a mischievous kid like smile was very well ontake on your face. “you literally could ask me for attention and i’ll give it to you.” “that’s a lie.” “only if you think it’s a lie then it’s a lie”

there we just a wave of silence that passed through, chishiya was just staring into your skull while you were acting like it’s a staring contest trying not to blink, your eyes were tearing up so you had to blink. “fuck!” you yelled out loud, a proud smile was plastered onto chishiya’s face.

“well since i have the flour out and you wont help me put it away, we should make something.” you put your hair up in a ponytail (short hair or long hair you decide) chishiya hugged you from behind placing a kiss on your crown, “what do you want to make chef?” he placed two more kisses on the crown of your head,

“mmm..i’m not too sure maybe something strawberry theme” you were scrolling through pinterest to find ideas, chishiya liked the idea of a strawberry dessert.

“i say we make a shortcake..” chishiya mentioned pointing at the shortcake recipe you passed on pinterest, you turned your head to look at him, “i like that idea, but you are going to help me make it!” yn grinned proudly; chishiya shrugged planting a small kiss on your cheek; a small giggle escaped your lips “if you keep giving me kisses we aren’t going to finish or even start the cake.”

“the cake can wait now. this is more important.” chishiya whispered giving you more kisses around the face. “you wanted the cake and now i’m craving it..” you giggled at the touch of the kisses. you quickly pecked him on the lips before pushing away. “lets do this cake come on chishi!” chishiya groaned at you escaping his grasp,

“can you get the vanilla extract..baking soda..salt..and sugar please!” you asked him as you went to the fridge to grab some eggs. “you’re so tall you can’t even reach them.” he snarled a comment, you quickly turned your head to him.

“if i were you i would shut up. i have some eggs in my hand right now.” you warned him, he puckered his lips before going to get the things you asked for. chishiya placed all the ingredients near you as he leaned against the countertop; his hands in his pocket.

“short person making a shortcake? this will be a sight to see.” chishiya watched as you mix the dry and the wets together in a bowl, you gave him a confused look causing him to have a stupid smirk on his face. “we can finally see which one is shorter.”

you stopped mixing the ingredients giving him a death stare look, “…you are so.” your face twitched—grabbing some flour from the box and throwing it at him. “..was that necessary??” he looked all at his clothes that have been covered with flour and his face and hair.

“if your short jokes were necessary thennnn the flour was necessary!!” you perked up your shoulders continuing the mixing. chishiya moved the bowl aside; grabbing you by the waist pulling him closer to you, “you wouldn’t mind having some flour on you for all the tall king jokes then?” his face that had flour on it was rubbed against you.

“CHISHIYAAAA” you huffed. a small smile was on his face, “you started it so i’m here to make this problem even bigger.” by the end of it, you had a bunch of flour on your face. he took a picture of a grumpy face flour covered you, “you look beautiful” he laughed giving you a small kiss on the lips. “i hate you.”

ılıl﹔ ◌ 𓂂 ˳⁺ 🍰 ꯭ ⊹ ⋆ ࣪

taglist : @nanamora

[ilycove]

Everything in the kitchen was messier than anything you've ever seen before.

The counters were covered in something white and powdery, you couldn't tell what it was anymore. It was going to be hell to clean up. The only thing that was untouched by the tornado of flour and powdered sugar was Quest's glasses, sat delicately on top of the microwave.

You sighed and looked over to Quest, relishing in delight with a stupid smile in his pink frilly apron. "Dear?"

His grin grows from ear to ear, awaiting your next instruction like a dog.

Your smile matches his and you reach over to pour some more chocolate chips in your hand. "Could you please get me," you pause and look over to your recipe. "half a teaspoon of baking soda?"

"If you stop eating chocolate chips by the handful, then sure." You roll your eyes and continue to mix your wet ingredients together, occasionally flinging some of the mixture onto you and the counters. You pay little to no mind to it when Quest comes over with your dry ingredients, and you look up at him with a tight smile. He leans forward a bit to try and see what you were so focused on. "Is something wrong?"

"No, nothing. This is just a tablespoon. And also baking powder. But it's fine, what's the worst that can happen?"

Quest gives you a weird look and retracts his head a bit. "You can tell the difference between baking soda and baking powder?"

"You can't tell the difference between a tablespoon and a teaspoon?"

He throws his hand up like a sassy child and squints at you, something you do right back to him. "In my defense, I'm not wearing glasses."

"And what's in your defense for wearing a pink apron?"

He twirls around a bit and laughs as he picks up the frills and lifts it, bowing down a bit. "I'm a pretty princess. C'mon, I'm sure you'd agree."

You laugh and shake your head. "God, you're a dork." You go to scoop two cups of flour out of the bag when you feel him wrap his arms around you and begin kissing up, from your shoulder blades to your neck and coming around to your collarbones. You attempt to shrug him off but you're the man and he's the leech. "Hey, princess, not now. I'm doing super serious business."

You feel his kisses falter a bit as airy chuckle come out of him. He looks up at you for a brief moment before asking, "Making cookies is super serious business?"

"I don't think I stuttered."

Quest seems taken aback by your responses, but is still laughing up a storm as you try and hold your chuckles back too. "And what's gonna get that attitude out of you?"

You don't answer, instead you turn around and kiss him tenderly. Quest seemed very happy by this and grabbed the edge of the counter to stabilize himself, knocking downs cup or two before helping you on the counter without care. He kisses you again and runs his fingers through your hair, stopping when he hears a disgruntled whine from you. He pulls back and looks at you, examining all kinds of faux-disappointment on your face. "Are you okay?"

"No, yeah, I'm just," You cut yourself off and laugh a little bit, pulling him closer. "You just got flour in my hair."

He shrugs with a shit-eating grin and kisses the corners of your lips before actually kissing you, laughing against your lips. "It's fine, you always liked it a bit messy."

He laughs harder when you hit his shoulder and still lean into him for another kiss.

[ispyspookymansion]

i don’t know why you’re collecting recipes but here’s one of mine

Really good brownies I came up with at 1 am

Preheat oven to 375 F. Line a METAL square or rectangle baking sheet with parchment paper. I used my 12x7 metal sheet, but anything of a similar size would work.

In a bowl, add 250g of granulated sugar and one stick of butter, melted. Mix, then let cool so you don't scramble your eggs. Add 2 large eggs plus two eggs yolks, vanilla extract, and mix. Then add 75g unsweetened cocoa powder, and 1/3 cup butter (or oil)

And 60-70g of whatever flour you want, I used rice. I would say a lighter flour for better texture, like rice, a pinch of salt if using unsalted butter, pinch of baking soda, tablespoon of corn starch. Corn starch is important. Stir in however much chocolate chips you want. The only acceptable variety is semisweet.

Spread batter evenly into pan. Bake for 25-30 minutes, it took me 25 but a smaller pan would take longer, check it however you wish. Wait until completely cool to cut or you will end up with brownie dust. Brownie dust, while delicious, is not what you came here for.

AW HELL YES. im collecting them to write out in the new little recipe book i got because i love stuff i can hold in my hands and protect from losing online. you wouldnt download a recipe …. (to get away from a million ads)

THAT BEING SAID what can i put for whose recipe it is? :]

[sterekchub]

What are your thoughts on a prompt featuring Stiles having a crush on a slob!Derek and giving him food, thinking Derek is unaware of his crush. Derek, however, is aware of Stiles’s crush on him and teases him until he confesses. Stiles ends up becoming submissive to a now megachub!Derek and is often in his fatpad, pleasuring Derek while he eats?

I LOVE slob Derek: gets teased all the time for his house looking like a pack of wolves lived there, rubbing his scent on everything and not particularly bothered if smells like BO or anything else: his loft is his territory.

Which naturally means when Derek gets fat and has someone to ordered around? He suddenly gets so much worse.

Stiles is as subtle as a knife to your throat. Derek can tell he’s interested from the first time they meet. Which means when Stiles starts coming up with terrible excuses of “there was a sale” “my dad didn’t want them.” “I cooked extra”

Derek eats everything starts off with just boxes of baked goods for breakfast, then - “Love your *puff* cooking. *urrrppH* Going to make me fat *mmmpphh* if you keep bringing me *BBBRRRRp* lunches like this.”

Soon Stiles is bringing him food every meal of the day. And he can only cook so much, so Derek hands him his credit card and starts demanding takeout and fast food to fill in the meals between.

Derek admits he’s overdoing it, playing this game of chicken with Stiles has ensured he’s doing nothing but eating all day. And a constant diet of baked goods and fast food has been hell on Derek’s gut…

Eventually Stiles admits he had a crush on Derek. By which point Derek has gone up three jean sizes, has a permanent ass imprint in the couch, and has been drinking 2liters of soda by the day.

“Might *urrrPPhhh* as well move *BlrrrppffftTT* in.”

****

I just picture Derek lounging on the couch, thighs spread wide to accommodate his belly. He hasn’t bothered with pants in months, not since getting his jeans on left him winded. The black tshirt he’s wearing is practically see through it’s stretched so thin over his flabby chest, doesn’t even cover most of his belly. The color doesn’t hide the multitude of cheese and grease and god knows what other stains they cover it. Stiles can’t remember the last time Derek bothered to change his shirt. Hell, he would even wear it in the shower- if Derek bothered with the shower once he outgrew it.

Stiles is cleaning up his binge from lunch- tossing empty soda bottles and pizza boxes and burger wrappers that Derek just drops on the ground into a huge trash bag.

Derek is still shoveling fries into his mouth with a pudgy hand. Crumbs spew everywhere as he demands, “

“Still got *bworrRRPPp* that *chew* cheesecake in the fridge?”

“Sure you have room? You ate a lot for lunch.”

Derek grunts and presses his greasy hands into his belly, rubbing the top of the flabby mass. It takes a few minutes, and then he lets out a steady stream of belches and farts. “*PffpffrrptTT**Bllbbfffttt* I’ve got plenty of “OOOOUUAAAP* room.”

Stiles brings the cheesecake out of the fridge. His own creation, it’s at least 5 pounds and laden with as many calories as Stiles could cram into it. He drops the entire plate on top of Derek’s middle, doesn’t bother with a fork. Derek wastes no time in digging into, using two fingers to scoop himself sloppy handfuls.

Stiles watches eat until about a quarter of the cheesecake is gone, waiting for the inevitable next command.

“A little *nnghhmm* help?”

Stiles happily drops to his knees. “Can barely find your dick in all this blubber.”

“Shut up and *fffrrrp* suck me *brrbllpfft* off.” Derek groaned through a mouthful of cheesecake.

It’s a sweaty mess of fat folds and dried come from Derek’s constantly leaking dick that’s long buried in his fat pad, Stiles has to press himself in the enveloping balloon that is Derek’s lardy body to even be able to suck him off. Just breathes in the reek that is his massive boyfriend as he slowly teases the tip of his dick, not letting him come until the entire cheesecake is crammed into Derek’s overfed middle.

[lordarsonizzzzt]

THEIR IDEAL DATE W/ YOU

I just wanted to write something cause im bored

characters: Jack Bright, Alto Clef, Kondraki, Draven, Iceberg, Gerald

JACK BRIGHT

✦ Jack strikes me as a funny guy when in a relationship, dates with him aren't fancy and shit, he doesn't want to go to a place where you have to waste tons of money for food

✦ She prefers going to McDonald, convencing the staff to give both of you balloons if they have any. Maybe go to an arcade or go bowling, fun dates are her thing.

✦ If you want to, she can book some fancy restaurant so you both can go, but it really isn't his thing. I'm so sure Bright just loves goofing around when not in the foundation cause those are the few times he gets to be out of the place.

✦ Don't get me wrong, he's loyal to the Foundation but it can be a bit too much plus the whole being inmortal thing, he preferes dates that involve going out and to places where you will have a fun story to tell.

ALTO CLEF

♫ Similar to Jack, he preferes fun dates, fancy never was and never will be his thing.

♫ But contrary to Jack, he prefers being indoors, that being said, he loves dates where you two cook together.

♫ HE IS going to mess with whatever you are doing, and YOU WILL have to try and stop him from putting weird shit into the mix.

♫ If you are baking a cake, he's going to try to put gummy worms in it, if you are making dinner, he'll try to put chocolates in the spaguetti.

♫ But that's perfect with you, because that's your man.

♫ If you both already planned to have a date but that day was kinda of shitty for him, he'll try to put through it anyways, most likely you will notice and it wil be time for cuddles and maybe a movie that is just there for background noise while both of you sleep.

♫ I headcannon Clef as a pretty clingy guy when in private, he needs constant praise but he'll prefer dying before admiting it, Lily left some pretty nasty scars on him (both mentally and phsically), so this 'dates' are more of a schedule for both of you, they happen once a week.

KONDRAKI

⌛︎ So this one depends on how much you support his drinking habit.

⌛︎ If you are ok with it you both will go to a bar and have a few drinks, but make sure they are actually a few because he doesn't know when to stop.

⌛︎ If you aren't okay with it, then you'll have dinners in your home, same as Clef, Kondraki prefers dates indoors rather than outdoors, he craves that domestic life. Hell! he may even invite Draven and Talloran if it's cool with you.

⌛︎ If Draven comes, he is not buying any alcoholic drinks, not even beer.

⌛︎ If he doesn't, he'll buy probably two cans of beer or vodka, enough to not get him wasted.

⌛︎ Dates with him are filled with talking about this and that, a new book he got into, some dumbass in the Foundation, a guy you don't like from your work and so on.

DRAVEN

➳ THIS BOY.

➳ Anything will do good with him, wanna go to the beach? Okay! Want to try out food in this new restaurant? Sure, let's go! Wanna do a picnic? HE'S ON HIS WAY.

➳ He likes to have dates at night time, maybe have some take-out and eat in a park while you both talk, walk around holding hands.

➳ He likes to gossip, no you can't change my mind. He'll call you up and will tell you to come to his apartment, when you are there, there are a lot of bags of chips, candies and sodas

➳ You'll paint his nails while he tells you about some weird break up that happened in the foundation, you will ask him to stay still because he uses his hands so much to get his point across.

➳ Probably the only one that will take you to a fancy place with no trouble, yeah it's not his thing but it doesn't hurt to act like you are both rich and important people for one night.

➳ 10/10 would date again.

*I RAN OUT OF PATIENCE TO DO LIL DRAWINGS FOR THEM SORRY LMAO*

ICEBERG

❆ THIS. BITCH.

❆ "Why do you wanna go out if we see each other every day"

❆ Don't expect going out with him, he has to be in a really good mood to take you out, if you wanna go alone or with friends he has no trouble paying for you.

❆ But he's just, not going out, not his thing at all.

❆ Similar to most in this list, preferes staying inside, he'll make breakfast for you and you can watch a movie on the mornings.

❆ At night time, he'll order something from your favourite place and probably some dessert, he'll tell you he got it because it was cheap and it was for him, but since he was going to get something might as well feed you too.

❆ He got himself something else tho, he didn't ate desseart because it was for you.

❆ This one also craves domesticity, but he won't say it. He loves kisses in the morning when making coffee, holding hands when coming home and cuddling at night.

❆ Hell! He may even tell you that he loves you, and verbal affection from him is one hell of an achievement.

GERALD

⚠︎ HE LOVES PICNIC DATES.

⚠︎ HE'LL BUY EVERYTHING IF NEEDED, BUT PLEASE JUST GO OUT WITH HIM TO A MEADOW OR A HILL AND HAVE A PICNIC DATE WITH HIM. HE'LL EVEN BEG.

⚠︎ Everything he gets is from the market, if he cooks he'll burn everything down and he just wants dates with you to be perfect, he feels like he doesn't deserve you and feels bad because there are so many guys out there that are better than him.

⚠︎ So he tries, he really tries to make these dates perfect, there is no way anything can go wro-

⚠︎ So, most of the time you end up going home and having the picnic on your backyard.

⚠︎ He gets attacked by bears, beers, steps on snakes by mistake, everything that could go wrong goes wrong.

⚠︎ He may even cry.

⚠︎ When you are in your backyard he'll try to feed you parts of the cake he bought, only to attract more fucking bees.

⚠︎ You'll feed him a strawberry and he'll choke on it, but that's to expect.

[inkwolvesandcoffee]

A Possible Crossover?

Okay, so I have a huge crush on Charlie Hunnam and watched The Gentlemen for the nth time (brilliant movie, highly recommend it). And it got me thinking about a crossover with Peaky Blinders.

Totally not only watching it for him… no, really! I seriously love it.

Anyway, what about a little rivalry between two wolves, the Wolf King of Camden and Law of Hammersmith and The Blood Hound of Kensington and Chelsea?😏

Just imagine being courted by Raymond Smith, Micky Pearson’s right hand, and him trying to not let his world interfere with yours. Bottles of fine whiskey, luxurious dinners at restaurants that leave you wondering how the hell he’s able to pay for them or at his estate (which is oddly large for a man living alone), trips around the UK and Ireland (often he’ll rent a holiday home outside the city or in the countryside, preferably the latter so you’re safe and he can let his inner Wolf out without anyone seeing him).

Since meeting you, Raymond is trying to get clean entirely. No more White Widow Super Cheese. He’s asked Bunny for help and together they’re working on it.

Alfie, on the other hand, courts you the old-fashioned way by leaving you flowers, handwritten notes, and homebaked goods. He especially prides himself on his soda bread, made according to an old family recipe. There are very few people who know about it and its exquisite taste because he doesn’t sell it at his bakery. However, each time you drop by, he makes sure to serve you a sandwich made from it and give you a loaf before you leave.

Though he knows he has his own vices as well, drugs is one he’s never meddled in. Nevertheless, that’s not to say he doesn’t know about the dangers of the criminal underbelly dealing in them. As such, it makes him highly uncomfortable you’re associating with one of the top dogs (no pun intended) in the industry. Henceforth, it requires a lot of patience, suppressed growls and snarls, and hiding of fangs whenever you drop by with Ray at your side.

Alfie’s well aware you adore his bakery and he makes you your coffee exactly the way you like it. So the last thing he wants to do is ruin the time you spend there, in his most personal part of London. But whenever the other Wolf is at your side, his own floats to the surface enough to be unleashed if he loses his composure for even a split second. He’ll try his best to keep his temper in check, but the seething violence mixed with jealousy will show in how he’ll grumble his way through the conversation, shorter than usual, and avoid your gaze. Ray he just completely ignores.

Fortunately, you never fail to catch the apologetic glances in your direction nor turn a blind eye to the way he hangs his head as he offers you a basket with baked goods before you head out.

Each time it happens, he hopes you’re alone next time.

Because then he might finally have the courage to sit down for a cup of coffee with you.

Ngl, I’m kinda here for this concept. Might have a crack at it sometime soon.🤔

Tag list: @buttercupsandboys @hecatemoon87 @potter-solomons @zablife @liliac-dreamer @babaohhhriley @dreamlandcreations @wandawiccan60 @solomons-finest-rum @alikaheroes @rose-like-the-phoenix @vir-tual

[nobedofroses]

December 13th

pairing: Marcus Moreno x reader

warnings: fluff

words: 650

a/n: getting a little out of hand with a school bake sale Hot chocolate/baking/dancing prompt from @toomanystoriessolittletime's winter writing challenge ❄️

more Marcus, Full List

🌨️🌨️🌨️

One of Missy’s class’ last hurrahs before winter break was holding a bake sale to raise money for… something. Probably new music stands or a football stadium or something like that. You didn’t really remember because as soon as the words, “bake sale” were out of Missy’s mouth, your focus jumped to strategy and the rest of her sentence was lost in a swirl of brownies, cookies, and popcorn balls. 

In the week preceding the sale, you made multiple grocery trips as each new idea was solidified. Everything together, you were making three kinds of cookies, two kinds of brownies, winter-themed popcorn balls, and a couple batches of macarons just to elevate things a little bit. 

Missy was pretty much just allowed to help with the scooping and decorating (and licking the bowl of course) and that was fine with her. Marcus, after nearly measuring out a tablespoon of baking soda instead of a teaspoon, was not allowed to help with anything. The only time he was allowed in the kitchen was when he got to try the wonky leftover-dough cookie that seemed to be a part of every batch. 

It was going pretty well, despite Marcus’ sulking, but you were somewhat behind. Missy had gone to sleep, so you had to scoop things yourself which meant less time to do things while the batch in the oven baked. 

At 11:00pm, Marcus came gingerly into the kitchen, “How are you doing, angel?” 

“I’m good, it’s fine. The macarons are resting and the popcorn is made and one of the cookies and two of the brownies— or was it two of the cookies and one of the brownies…?” you trailed off, hurrying over to the boxes of completed treats to count them. 

Marcus, sensing your impending spiral, came over and wrapped his arms around your waist from behind. “Sweetheart, I know you love doing this, and you’re doing a great job, but this is supposed to be fun, right? I mean really, shouldn’t something like this be time for you and Missy to spend together? And maybe even your husband if he needs to remember his glasses before trying to bake?” 

You couldn’t help but melt back into his arms as he talked, the rumble of his chest soothing you instantly, “It’s just— I love baking—”

“I know.”

“And I want to help Missy’s school—”

“I know.”

“And—” 

“Angel, everything you’re saying is great, but need I remind you that you also have a full time job? I mean, if you wanna turn baking into something more intense than a hobby, I’d totally support you. But now, right now, you don’t need to spend up baking seven different things when they only asked if you could bring a dozen cookies,” came his gentle but firm reminder. 

“They only asked for a dozen?” you asked incredulously, turning in his arms to face him. 

“Yes, sweetheart, because the 23 other kids in her class will also bring something to sell, and that right there is nearly 300. Hell, they might turn you away with your, what, 150 all on your own?” Marcus guessed. 

“161…” you murmured. 

“You’re so ridiculously sweet, angel,” Marcus said with a laugh. “But let’s just finish up the batch that’s in the oven, and put everything else in the freezer. You need to get to bed. We both do.” 

The little look in Marcus’ eye was enough to make you realize what he meant, and remember what you typically did on Thursday nights. 

“Oh! Yeah, good idea, we can bake these next week for us. Um, let me just put that away, if you can load the dishwasher?” you were already out of Marcus’ arms, grabbing the containers you had that could hold so much scooped dough. “And then bed.” 

“And then bed.” Marcus agreed, and the two of you had that kitchen cleaned up in record time.

🌨️🌨️🌨️

[shinyhappygoth]

For the release of Good Omens Season 1, I baked a cake with the bottom layer devil's food cake and the top layer angel food cake, plus filling and frosting representing the Earth. It was excellent, but when S2 rolled around, I decided that I didn't really need an entire layer cake, and besides, I wanted to try an experiment. The experiment has been highly successful, and so I present:

Heaven 'n' Hell Cupcakes

What we're doing here is baking the devil's food and angel food together into a unit. I would just say use your favorite recipe for each, but I will not say that because as it happens the tricky bit was finding a pair of recipes where the baking instructions matched, and you probably don't want to mess with that.

Line a muffin pan with paper liners. If you don't have them, I think what you'll want to do is carefully grease and flour only the bottoms of the muffin cups. (I say flour, but I have been advised that you can also use cocoa powder, or a mixture of the two, for this purpose.)

Devil's Food Cake

(recipe from Erren's Kitchen, halved)

Ingredients:

1/4 cup unsweetened cocoa powder

1/4 cup light brown sugar

1/2 teaspoon espresso powder or instant coffee

1/2 cup hot water

3/4 cup all-purpose flour

1/4 teaspoon salt

1/4 teaspoon baking powder

1/4 teaspoon baking soda

1/2 stick unsalted butter (room temperature)

3/8 cup superfine sugar

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1 egg (room temperature)

In a bowl, whisk together the cocoa powder, coffee, brown sugar, and hot water. Set aside.

In a separate bowl, mix the flour, salt, baking powder, and baking soda together and set aside.

In a third bowl (this should be the largest one, everything's ending up in here), cream the butter and sugar together, beating well until pale and fluffy. Add the vanilla extract.

Beat in the egg. Mix in the flour mixture in alternation with the cocoa mixture, about half of each at a time, until fully combined. Do not overbeat.

Spoon the batter into the muffin pan, dividing it evenly between the cups, trying not to let it drip down the sides. Set this aside. You'll probably want to preheat your oven to 350°F around now.

Angel Food Cake

(recipe from Life Made Simple, halved)

Ingredients:

3/8 cup + 1 tablespoon superfine sugar

1/4 cup cake flour (or all-purpose flour but replace 1 1/2 teaspoons of it with cornstarch)

1/8 teaspoon salt

3 egg whites

1 1/2 tablespoons warm water

3/8 teaspoon cream of tartar

1/4 teaspoon vanilla extract

Sift half of the sugar with the salt and the cake flour; set aside the remaining sugar.

In a mixing bowl, whisk together the egg whites, water, cream of tartar, and vanilla extract. After whisking by hand for approximately 2 minutes, switch to a hand or stand mixer. Gradually sift in the remaining sugar, beating at medium speed until medium peaks have formed.

Add the flour mixture a little at a time (you'll want to add it in about 8 additions). It should be just enough flour to dust the top of the peaks. Use a spatula to fold in the dry ingredients in a circular motion, being careful to not deflate the peaks.

Once all of the flour has been folded in, carefully spoon the mixture into the muffin pan, on top of the devil's food batter.

Bake on the center rack of the oven for exactly 20 minutes. This was sufficient for me for a toothpick to come out clean when inserted through a gap in the angel food layer into the devil's food cake, but to be on the safe side, leave the cupcakes in the pan until completely cooled (this will allow the bottom layer to absorb the residual heat and continue to cook a bit).

If you prefer your cupcakes unadorned, that's it! If you want to get fancy, you can frost them, fill them, or both. I consulted a few recipes for reference but ultimately winged both of the following. There will be extra filling left over, and may be leftover frosting depending on your preferences.

Honey Cinnamon Walnut Whipped Cream Filling

Ingredients:

1/2 cup heavy cream (cold)

1 tablespoon honey

1-2 teaspoons cinnamon, according to taste

1/4 teaspoon vanilla extract

a pinch of salt

1/4 cup walnuts

Pulse the walnuts in the food processor until coarsely ground.

Whip the cream until soft peaks form (this will not take long). Add the other ingredients, being careful not to overbeat. When adding the honey, drizzle it on so the cold doesn't congeal it into too much of a lump.

Use a cupcake corer to make a hole down the middle of each cupcake; if you need to dig out a little more, you can use a baby spoon, but be careful not to go through the bottom. Use the baby spoon to fill the holes with the whipped cream mixture. If you're planning to ice the cupcakes, I recommend not filling them quite to the top, and cutting a slice from the top of each removed core to cap them off.

If you fill your cupcakes, keep them refrigerated.

Honey Cinnamon Buttercream Frosting

Ingredients:

1 stick (1/2 cup) salted butter

2 tablespoons honey

1 teaspoon cinnamon

1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract

1 1/2 cups confectioner's sugar

Cream together the butter, honey, cinnamon, and vanilla extract. Add the confectioner's sugar 1/2 cup at a time, beating until smooth.

Buttercream covereth a multitude of sins.