#yonic sweep

[fazgoo-connoiseur-1987]

back to my roots

[marvus-xoloto]

💋🌺👧( instead of sibling, the other jades?) for Lanque?

Anonymous said: for lanque? 🔗 👧 (but like, cloistermates) 🍟

Lanque time 😎 under a cut for length! thanks for your patience!!!

💋 - How does Lanque feel about people who cheat? Does he see a reason for it, or is it completely immoral?

Outwardly, Lanque pulls the “that’s just how it is on this bitch of an earth.” He’s not going to stop them or say anything, but he will snitch ASAP because he wants that quid pro quo, hurt for hurt. He definitely does not think it’s okay, and he definitely loses respect towards a person who can’t be devoted and honest in a committed relationship. For all that he may shirk his duties and responsibilities as a jade, you don’t live a lifestyle like that and not want to have something similar to the dedication that you give to a system you may not even believe in.

More personally, I think Lanque is jaded (no pun intended) enough to believe that people are inherently good. Does he think cheating is justified? No, but he knows it happens and he wouldn’t be surprised if it happened to him, either. Though he sees no real reason to cheat, he is not so idealistic to not expect it. He personally would never consider the idea in his own committed relationships, few and far between as those are. Making someone jealous with a little flirting, however, is fair game. Cheating to Lanque is more an emotional thing than a physical thing.

___

🌺 - Does Lanque have a favorite flower? Why does he like it?

OKAY so deep headcanon time. I associate rainbow drinkers with victorian era stories of vampires (it’s about the repressed se//xuality, sensuaIity, and longing), and because of this I think there is a lot of flower language and symbolism that dedicated fans like to devote themselves to.

Lanque is a dedicated fan; his rp sessions are well researched. He knows the flower language. 

BUT he also has to like the shape of the flower itself. So, his favorite flowers are: gardenias (the white petals to remind you of his white lapels; the meaning is “secret love), wild roses (outward appearance of traditional romance, the meaning is “pleasure and pain”), calla lillies (the yonic suggestiveness of the deep color surrounded by white is well known and well documented in purple prose throughout rainbow drinker livechurnal rpers, the meaning is simply “beauty), and amaryllis (an ostentatious flower for “pride”).

___

👧 - What is Lanque’s relationship like with his siblings cloistermates? Who does he get along with best?

In order of most well liked to least well liked:

Wanshi: The truth comes out: Lanque gets along children. There’s a small spark of hope he feels when he sees innocence and genuine, childlike happiness; he wants her to feel that for as long as possible, but at the same time he feels both resentment and resignation. She won’t keep that innocence long, and he’s jealous that she gets to feel it at all. Still, they have fun together. Wanshi is good at bringing out the storyteller in Lanque, and Lanque likes that she’s an accidental shit starter (not her fault the jades are all so wound tight).

Daraya: he truly sees her as a younger version of himself, like a little sister. There’s a secret desire there to make her the best version of what he’s trying to be, since he believes he can help her prevent making the same mistakes he has. They genuinely have fun griping and complaining and slacking off together. Just because they get along, though, doesn’t mean they don’t butt heads. Lanque thinks she tries too hard to be apathetic; Daraya thinks Lanque can be pushy and too eager to jump into risky behavior. Lanque thinks Daraya is impulsive; Daraya thinks the same of him. Daraya thinks Lanque tries too hard and goes to far to prove his points; Lanque thinks Daraya has no points to prove.

Bronya: Feels some grudging respect towards her, but yearns for the person she could have been. Lanque will never get along with people who he perceives (or people who perceive themselves) as authority figures. I have too many feelings to articulate in words about their relationship; I tried to capture it in my fic “Self (ish)” but idk if I was successful. I’ll make another post about it when I can organize my thoughts better. 

Karako: His “annoying” younger brother; really, he’s jealous that Bronya lets Karako get away with so much shit that the jades would get reamed for. But Karako is a good listener, and they occasionally have fun exploring the caverns together. Lanque finds Karako’s curiosity endearing, despite everything. Still, the caste divide does drive a wedge between them. Lanque refuses to acknowledge and struggles on Karako’s part because Lanque views the cloistered jade struggle as the worst there is.

Lynera: Bad boy, meet snitch. Need I say more? They hate each other and I genuinely do not believe either will ever miss the other.

___

🔗 - What are Lanque’s standards for meaningful relationships? How quickly does he form relationships like these?

Please forgive me for bullet points! I’m having a hard time organizing these points for whatever reason.

-There has to be devotion and dedication. He needs to feel wanted and pursued.

-Hates to feel pitied; it’s easier for him to swallow anger. If he can see your anger towards the system instead of waxing poetic about how he ~*suffers*~, he is more likely to trust you and assume that you’d be willing to help him. It’s the difference between kindness and niceness for him; if your car broke down on the side of the road, apologizing for the break down doesn’t do shit without a jack and a wrench. Lanque has no need for niceties in his life, but genuine kindness goes a long way for him, especially if it isn’t sugar coated.

-Needs to feel a deep emotional connection with someone. Lanque secretly judges his meaningful relationships on how much hurt they could bring him: the idea of losing them, the idea of being without. If it hurts, he knows his feelings are real. He doesn’t latch onto people easily.

-As for how quickly, it’s a long process. He needs time to accept his feelings, first, and he will put you through the gauntlet before committing. It’s a little “if you can’t handle me at my Worst, you don’t deserVe me at my best 💅💅 “ but it’s also a little bit of fear, too. As stated above, he judges his feelings based on how much it would hurt to lose you. If he’s putting you through the gauntlet, he can convince himself it wasn’t meant to be if you leave.

___

🍟 - How does Lanque feel about his body? Would he change it if they could?

He’s hot and he knows it. He has changed it! He had top surgery at around 8 sweeps. But he doesn’t feel the need to change anything else about his body. 

Ask game found here!

[marnie1964]

Karate Kid/Cobra Kai survey

i'm gonna consider myself tagged

It’s the year 2021 and you’re obsessed with The Karate Kid. How are you feeling?: an unexpected turn of events but it's passing the quarantine, i guess!

Did you grow up with TKK or are you new to the series?:  to be completely honest, i don't really like the movies? i didn't vibe with them as a kid and when i went back and tried to watch them this year i couldn't make it all the way through.* i think they're well crafted movies, but i've never liked relatable young boy wish fulfillment (i couldn't even get thru harry potter as a kid), and i think the first one is guilty of burying the lede twice over with regards to mr. miyagi and later the relationship between kreese and johnny. and lucky me--these are exactly the areas that cobra kai delivers on.

*except for the third one, which imo is a camp masterpiece and also genuinely heartbreaking. it's the only one that allows daniel to be an genuine pain in the ass. i think i've finally figured out what the target audience for cobra kai is: people who's favorite karate kid movie was tkk3 (me).

We gotta do the basics. Favorite character: johnny! what is a man but a miserable pile of bruce springsteen lyrics? or aimee mann lyrics? or mountain goats lyrics? or otis redding lyrics? or--fuck, have americans ever written songs about anyone else? i have an unreal amount of good will towards this man and his late-life struggle for recuperation. he's the heart of the show both in terms of his relationships with other characters and in terms of zabka's chemistry with the other actors.

my deep dark double secret fave is kreese. he makes me feel real anger in a way that's usually reserved for characters in vince gilligan shows. i'm a bit obsessed with him and his preoccupation with johnny and later johnny's teenaged son (I Have Thoughts). the show does a great job of making what he did to johnny--and all the years and years and years of fallout from that--feel really real, which makes him one of the most viscerally despicable villains i've ever come across . it's unironically among the best portrayals of domestic abuse i've seen, may god have mercy on our souls. the decision to pop out from behind a fucking cardboard cutout of himself to scare daniel in tkk3 was also a hilarious galaxy brain move. aspirational stuff.

also--shout out to daniel-san. the writers really had to work their asses off to make him into a character that appeals to me, and i think they did a great job of it. he's a cringey tool who's capable of displaying a surprising amount of integrity under the right circumstances! he's tom wambsgans! he's pete campbell! he's wonderful i love him!

Favorite ship:  johnny & daniel (what if mysterious skin was a sports comedy??)

Underrated character: the True and Correct answer to this question can only be aisha, although i don't think she was actually underrated by anyone besides the writers. chozen is also lowkey my favorite katate child because c'mon, he had everything (spear fights! ziplines! teen death matches! formfitting disco-era polyester button down shirts worn with gold chains!)

Underrated ship (don’t say therapy, lol):  uhhhh... the only teen couple that could have been interesting is tory/aisha. they were cute together and their friendship rang true to me. it's that thing where you're the new girl and you're conventionally attractive, but on the inside you know you're a freak so you immediately gravitate towards the most obvious female outsider. i lived it, bay-bey!

i also think there are interesting things to explore with carmen and johnny's relationship. i don't know if the writers are even aware of it (i lean towards no b/c men amirite) but the entire premise of carmen's character is that she chose to live in poverty to protect herself and her son from a bad man with power. she's thereby the exact opposite of johnny's mother, who (at least by his understanding) married hollywood film producer shmarvey shmeinstein to provide her son with a better life. so, there's a lot to unpack in his attraction to her. also they're super hot hur hur i like sexy nurse thing hur hur.

Wax On, Wax Off or Sweep the Leg?: i can't look directly at it, but sweep the leg. zabka what the fuck man.

Which of Daniel’s dumb little outfits is your favorite?:  i don't think i've seen anyone mention this one yet, but the football jersey with the sweatpants. it makes him look so small and huggable, i wanna pick him up and set him on my shelf or something.

Character from the films you most want to return, who’s not Terry Silver: bring back ali's lesbian girl gang!!! or else--dutch. he was funny and iconic, i loved his exaggerated offended reaction to everything daniel said or did in tkk. also, i'm tacky so i'm a sucker for aggressively bleach blonde hair. the SCANDALIZED wasp couple standing behind ali and johnny in the spaghetti scene will also do. or terry's secretary (an mvp--i believe the original actress has passed away so in my heart of hearts she's portrayed by j. smith-cameron).

Scene that lives in your head rent-free: the whole character development speed run that johnny does from sweep the leg to crying while handing daniel the trophy to getting strangled in the parking lot by his beloved teacher. i'm especially transfixed by that last bit--what's the thought process of a man who decides to publicly execute his teenage student via strangulation? why did none of the many bystanders call the police? johnny is the real kitty genovese, prison for everyone.

from the cobra kai series proper: daniel's decision to greet johnny with a big hug after not seeing him for 35 years and never actually being friends with him (I Have Thoughts), the heinously creepy scene where johnny is repeating the cobra kai mantra for miguel and his entire disposition completely changes (demonic possession shit), and johnny's tiny go-ahead-and-kill-my-abuser nod (his face is so stoney after being so animated at dinner) coupled with daniel's shaky little sign of relief (macchio is really the cutest when he looks scared).

it goes without saying that every johnny & miguel scene lives rent free in my HEART.

Will Anthony LaRusso ever be relevant?: anthony becomes relevant for one (1) episode next season when amanda and daniel finally get around to putting him up for adoption.

You live in The Valley and are forced into the karate gang war.  Which dojo do you join?:  i enter the cobra kai dojo decked out in all of my snake-themed clothing and jewelry (it's a lot). i approach kreese and explain to him that the open mouth of a snake, viewed head-on, is a yonic symbol. i am permanently banned from the cobra kai dojo.

(seriously though, assuming i'm a teen in this scenario i think i would have vibed with tory/miguel/aisha. dimitri and sam would have driven high school me up the fucking wall though. the cobra kai style looks like more fun/better exercise. do i also genuinely believe most young girls could actually benefit from someone yelling no mercy down their neck? maybe so 💖)

What’s your training montage song?:  50ft queenie - pj harvey (it takes place in the alison bechdel feminist karate dojo ofc)

It’s the crossover event of the century! Which TV show are you combining with Cobra Kai for an hour-long Saturday night special?: it's a full episode flashback to the time johnny got arrested in albuquerque, new mexico. johnny's court-appointed attorney is a weirdly hot babe who seems like a super straight laced killjoy at first, but soon reveals herself to be an unhinged woman. one thing leads to another, and johnny winds up in bed with her and her loser husband. there are lots of great themes about punitive justice, people's ability to change for the better (and worse), and what makes someone "good" or "bad" to begin with, but mostly it's just really hot sex. the husband tries to sell johnny a prepaid cellphone and johnny tell's him that cellphones are never gonna catch on, cause who want's to be bothered by people all the time like that?

better call saul. it's a better call saul crossover ep.

(fwiw think that greg 'hbo succession' hirsch should also be terry's cousin greg on the non-roy side. think about it--the roys are small people, but cousin greg is really tall?? and who else is really tall, and a blue eyed brunette to boot? terry silver. it all adds up! this never becomes relevant to the plot, in any case, i'm just considering it canon until the writers come to my house and explicitly tell me i'm wrong.)

Tagging: anyone who's interested 😘

[gentlejack]

@inherimage​​ sent: I hear you, loud and clear.

        “ Well then. In THAT case, ” Anne's hand sweeps towards the massage table to deliver a smart pat onto its sleek leather surface, “ do make yourself comfortable, Vera. Lie down. On your front, please - yes, the underwear must go. All of it. ”

         Ever the epitome of courteousness, Anne turns her back on the prim little woman while she fumbles her way around the initial unfamiliarity of laying herself quite so intimately bare to a stranger. She strides towards the antique washstand by the window and plunges her hands into the porcelain basin sat on top, subjecting herself to the world's thoroughest cleansing. Her skin is lathered in copious amounts of soap, her newly cut fingernails are scrubbed until they sparkle, and the ritual finds its completion in a splash of disinfectant. Then, with a nudge of her elbow against a respective button, Anne lets the curtains fall before the windows. Heavy, wine-dark velvet, of course, very much in spirit of Shibden Hall as she originally inherited it -- though its elegance and class have undeniably improved under her ownership. Her supervision has polished away the grime of centuries of usage, yet preserved the estate’s blue-blooded charm in its carved wall panels, lacquered furniture and gold-framed paintings. Respectability. THAT is the air she wants the place to convey, so that women like Miss Bennett may feel entirely at ease in her medical care. She dares say, all in all, that her efforts have been successful --- well, except for the ghastly strings of beads cascading across the door to her study. One of Marian's particularly idiotic ideas, to be corrected as soon as humanly possible.

        “ Well, Vera! I am delighted to meet you at last. Since this is your first appointment, let me fill you in on the procedure, hmm? ” She returns to her patient's side carrying a warm towel, which is draped across the small of Vera's back with a gentlemanly flourish. “ We shall work our way towards your centre through a lengthy full-body massage, starting with your back and then moving on to the front. When you are ready - if you are ready, though I assume you WILL be -, we shall take the next step and begin with your yonic therapy session, which will be continued until its natural conclusion, or until you choose to end it. ” There. The rules are laid out. Time for Miss Bennett to do the talking. Anne cups a calm hand around the back of her patient's head and sets upon the methodical task of loosening her strictly tied bun, fingertips rubbing deliberate circles into Vera's tension-filled scalp. “ So. Tell me why you're hurting. ”

[dolly-decadatia]

Notes 12/1/20 s.c book

Incorporate altered consciousness into practice as soon as I move to Nevada.

Reach state of ecstasy during rites- incorporate Invocation of Lust rite from LaVey?

Eww so much gender binary bullshit... kind of toying with the idea of pop culture paganism using Spike and Drusilla but grossed out by the gender binary and heteronormativity of the god and goddess and I don’t want that ickiness all over my comfort characters. Something to ponder further.

Reincarnation is brought up. Not sure how I feel about that either. This all made so much more sense to me when I was like 12.

Magic is the practice of moving natural energies to effect needed change.

I’m like 2 pages in and he’s annoying me already. I was definitely remembering Scott Cunningham with a nostalgia lens.

Next chapter is The Deities. Skipping this completely.

Chap 3 Magic:

2 main sources of energy: personal power, earth power.

Personal power- is the life force that sustains our earthly existences. We absorb energy from the moon and sun, from water and food. We release it during movement, exercise, and sex. Even exhaling releases some power, though we recoup the loss through inhaling. In Magic, personal power is aroused, infused with a specific purpose, and directed toward its goal.

Earth power- is that which resides within your planets and in it’s natural products. Stones, trees, wind, flames, water, crystals, and scents all possess unique, specific powers that can be used during magical ritual.

No matter the magical system, personal power must be infused with the need and then released.

I am more than comfortable incorporating negative Magic in my practice. Scott is super judgmental and priggish and I am not feeling his sanctimonious ranting on the topic.

You don’t need elaborate rites every-time. If nothing else, light a candle, settle down before it and concentrate on your magical need. Trust yourself.

Chap 4 tools

The broom- oh lawd he really thinks there were Wiccans during the burning times before Gardner was born. I can’t with him....

Anyway the broom is used for spiritual cleansing (don’t let the bristles touch the ground). Visualize the broom sweeping out the astral buildup that occurs where humans live. This purifies the area to allow smoother ritual workings. Since it is a purifier, the broom is linked with the element of water. Thus it is also used in all types of water spells including those of love and psychic workings. To make your own broom the classic formula is a ash staff, birch twigs, and a willow binding. The ash is protective and the birch is purifying. The willow is religious and therefore non applicable. A tiny broom of pine needles can also be used. There are many old spells involving brooms 🧹. In general the 🧹 is a purificatory and protective instrument used to ritually cleanse the area for Magic or to guard a home by laying in across the threshold, and under the bed, in windowsills, or on doors 🚪.

I personally like cinnamon brooms 🧹. I used to customize them for the sabbaths when I was Wiccan with colored ribbon and sprigs of the appropriate herbs or flowers. I miss doing that.

The wand:

Instrument of invocation. Also used to direct energy, draw magical 🧙‍♂️ symbols or a circle ⭕️ on the ground, to point towards danger ⚠️ while perfectly balanced on a witch’s hand ✋ or even stir a brew in a cauldron. The wand represents the element of air.

Traditional woods used for wand: willow, elder, oak, apple, peach, hazel, cherry 🍒 and more.

Can even use a wooden dowel and carve and/or paint it.

Crystal can also be used.

Any stick you find will be infused with energy and power.

Censer:

Incense burner. I liked the gold swingy ones because they remind me of Spike but I’m uncomfortable with the concept of a breeding pair of deities and don’t want to taint spike and Dru by pigeon holing them into those gross roles. Really really like that censer though... will have to ponder.

When no specific incense is called for in rituals and spells, use your own intuition and creativity in determining which blend to use.

Spirits can be called to appear in visible form in the smoke rising from the censer. He said “command” which seems rude and I don’t vibe with bullying spirits. I want to be their friends. He also said this is not a part of Wicca. I’m not Wiccan sooooo. C’mon incense ghosties. It’s party time at my place .

Sitting while breathing slowly and watching the smoke can be an entrancing act, and you might slip into an alternate state of consciousness.

Cauldron- ancient vessel of cooking and brew making, steeped in magical tradition and mystery. (Grain of salt- he’s talking about Wicca which is not ancient at all.) the cauldron is the container in which magical transformations occur; the sea of primeval creation. The cauldron is often a focal point of ritual. During spring rites it is often filled with fresh water 💧 and flowers 💐; during winter ❄️ a fire 🔥 may be kindled within the cauldron but the reasoning behind this is very religious so.....

The cauldron should be should be iron, resting on 3 legs, with its opening smaller than its widest part. It can be used for scrying by filling it with water and gazing into it.

Athame:

Used for directing energy not cutting. Often dull, usually double-edged with a black handle because black absorbs power. When the athame is used in ritual a bit of energy gets stored in the handle for later use. A sword can be used (like in Church of Satan rituals) if space permits. My trailer is so small it’s tempting to temporarily use a pocket knife until I move 😂. Scott says knives are phallic but pre op trans men aren’t shaped like knives. Coming out has really opened my eyes to how bullshitty concepts of yonic or phallic are. Not feeling it.

Bolline -

White handled practical working knife you actual use as a knife unlike the athame.

Crystal sphere- used for divination. They remind me of Dru because anything psychic does but like I said- I don’t want to disrespect Drusilla by show horning her into the Wiccan idea of goddess. Can be used to store energy or receive messages. Periodic exposure to moonlight, or rubbing the crystal with fresh mugwort will increase its ability to spark our psychic powers. It may be the center of full moon 🌕 rituals.

Cup- simply a cauldron on a stem. Scott calls it a fertility symbol. Gross. Not in my practice. Contains ritual beverage imbibed during ritual. I need to decide what my liquid will be. It was cranberry juice when I was a teen witch, wine as an adult, and Jack Daniels when I was a pop culture pagan (for spike). Cup can be any substance. I have an awesome baphomet goblet in the storage unit I can use. I still love satanic imagery.

Pentacle- Wiccan specific. Non applicable.

Book of shadows- can be handwritten or digital. Ideally rites should be memorized which is daunting with my learning disability and memory issues brought on by depression but I’ll try.

Bell-

Ritual instrument of incredible antiquity. (Source needed on that, Scott). Ringing a bell unleashes vibrations that have powerful effects according to its volume, tone, and material of construction. Also rung to to ward off evil spirits (what does he mean by that? Let’s not be frigging fluffbunnies) to halt storms or evoke good energies. Placed in cupboards or hung on the door, it guards the home. Bells are sometimes rung in ritual to mark various sections and signal a spell’s beginning or end.

As you collect each tool, you can prepare it for ritual. If old, it should be stripped of all associations and energies; you don’t know who owned the tool or what purposes it may have been used for. To begin this process, clean the tool physically using the appropriate method. When the object is clean and dry, bury it in the earth or a bowlful of sand or salt for a few days, allowing the energies to disperse. An alternate method involves plunging the tool into the sea, river, lake, or even your own bathtub 🛁 after purifying the 💦 by adding a few pinches of salt 🧂.

Use common sense and don’t wreck your tool with water or salt if the material would get wrecked.

After a few days dig up the tool, wipe it clean, and it is ready for magic 🪄. If you use the 💦 method, leave the object submerged for a few hours, then dry it.

There are consecration ceremonies later In the book. Use common sense and edit them as needed to make them non secular or hunt on tumblr for alternate methods.

[2x2verse]

I’LL NEVER CATCH UP FOR STRIDERCEST WEEK [takes another bite of toast, transforms into a shiba inu]

hello my kink is “nonbinary robots with interchangeable genital attachments”

cw for genital/orientation fuckery

It’s Only Science If You Write It Down [dirkhal]

Switching out panels is... doable. By yourself, theoretically. You think you have all the ports lined up, and you think the arrays are communicating, but it’s hard to tell, because everything’s so delicate and sensitive anyways. A good double-check would be looking at it in a mirror, but it’s at an awkward angle, and you don’t want to risk walking and dislodging something in the process.

Good thing you have a built-in double-check that’s just sitting there in the living room doing something that isn’t you. With your network connection, you tap into the television speakers to call out to him: “Dirk!”

TT: Stop showing off, bro, you have my attention.

“I need to run an experiment.”

TT: Then just get some graph paper and a pencil. It’s only science if you write it down.

“I also need all constants present to verify the results.”

TT: Implying I’m one of the constants, because you’re talking to me. TT: Fine. Where are you?

You can hear him shift off the couch, start following the hallway to the back of the apartment you share. “Just past Parliament and the second star to the right,” you say, your voice following him over intercom.

“Of course, right where I left--” Dirk’s voice stutters to an abrupt stop as he gets past the threshold of the bedroom.

Well, you must make quite the sight, you have to admit. The mattress has made for the best surface for any repairs or maintenance that needs done to your chassis, especially when you have to do it yourself; surrounding you are eyeglasses screwdrivers, a soldering iron, and some patching wires, along with other spare parts from your recent panel exchange. To that end, your legs are splayed open and you’re full naked, your ankles at each corner of the foot of the bed and your crotch on full display to anyone who walks through that door.

Your genitals, of course, being the panel that got swapped out. Your robodong is safe, out of the way on the nightstand, and back in its place (securely, you hope) is a yonic structure: clitoris, vulva, labia, vagina.

Dirk is fucking staring at it. Not at you--at it. Like it could bite him from two yards away or something. “What?” you challenge him. Shame is not exactly a thing you can feel, but irritation is.

“Why did you do that.”

“Mm, I think the better question is, why did you make this.” One hundred percent of your chassis, replacement parts and all, was designed by the man standing right in front of you.

“I--what--Hal, close your legs when I’m talking to you.” He’s pushing his shades up his face with his thumb on one point, middle finger on the other; it very conveniently totally blocks his view of your everything.

“I’m not sure that’s safe,” you tell him. “I can’t be sure it was installed correctly from this angle.”

“Then why the fuck--” Dirk takes a deep breath in through his nose, pushes it out heavy through his mouth. “Seriously, dude, this is weird.”

“Yes, I agree, you’re being weird.”

“Because you decided to do cosmetic surgery on yourself without telling me!”

“And would you have helped with this project?” Conspicuous silence from Dirk’s end. “Which is strange, because there’s no reason to make me a cunt if you don’t have some expectation of using it at some point.”

“Why would I use it? I’m gay,” Dirk says in a long-suffering tone.

“Christ. You transphobic shitlord. Get in here and help me make sure I didn’t damage myself.”

A snort. Then, Dirk drops his hand. “Okay. Okay, fine, but then you’ll--I’ll help you take it off again once you’re done doing your science, or whatever.”

“This is part of the science,” you tell him. This is really getting to him, and it’s interesting to watch his reactions. “Why is this bothering you so much?”

Dirk’s taken two steps into the room; he kneels at the foot of the bed, reaches up carefully. Still can’t bring himself to touch you. “Why isn’t this bothering you?”

“Having interchangeable parts?” He shakes his head. “Wearing this one?” A nod, and a soft hand on your thigh--but no further. “You can’t tell me you’ve never thought about it.” Well, he could, but he’d be lying to you--that’s something you both remember, idle twelve-year-old fantasies. “I have the option, so I pursued it. I can uninstall this whenever I want--with your help, of course--and go back to the other set.”

“So you just... don’t care?” His other hand comes up, runs a caress up from your other knee, and why does it feel like his thumbs are holding your thighs apart for inspection?

“Not so much. Is it really that strange?” Maybe he needs a more metaphysical explanation; the practical one doesn’t seem to be getting through to him. “I spent more than eight years not having a body, let alone a dick. And now I have genitals. It’s great. Everyone’s happy.” Or at least you thought Dirk would be jumping at the opportunity to try this without having sex with some icky gross girl or something.

The way Dirk has his hands on you right now is the same posture as when he’s about to go down on you, except his breath is nowhere near your skin. That’s the real disorienting part to you. His thumbs run up the insides of your thighs, end up where your legs meet the gap between--oh, that’s so sensitive, it takes some real effort not to close your legs and trap his hands there. You know what he’s trying to feel out: near-invisible screws holding you together, making sure your connections match up. Usually this maintenance is a little more routine and has a much... happier ending. Right now, though, Dirk’s hands are tensed, and you know he intends his touch to be as clinical as possible. Even his lips are pursed together when you deign to look down.

“So?” you prod him. “What’s the verdict?”

“Everything seems fine,” he admits. “So can we switch this out now?”

“Okay, let’s try this again: What the fuck is your problem, bro?”

His thumbs still haven’t left that sensitive gap. It’s too far from your labia proper, but it’s just close enough to be in a place where the sun don’t shine, and it’s a hint that there’s more sensation to come. “I’m--I mean, you’re--this is--” He swallows and tries to articulate himself a little better. “It’s not supposed to look like this.”

That doesn’t make any sense to you, but if you make this silence as uncomfortable as possible, you know Dirk will try to fill in the gaps in his meaning. He won’t do that if you’re staring at him, though, so you let your head fall back to the mattress.

“It’s like looking in a mirror,” Dirk tries to explain. His hands still haven’t left the vague area of your crotch. This isn’t just a maintenance inspection anymore; his thumbprints can’t leave the soft skin you’ve exposed to him. “Except there’s one part that’s just wrong. Everything else is the same, face, build, hair, stature, but--It’s like I’m looking at myself and I just don’t look like I’m supposed to. I can’t believe it doesn’t feel like that for you.”

“I have zero problems with this.” Especially since Dirk has extremely capable hands and they won’t leave the vicinity of your princess parts; your hips have started a very gentle tilt with every sweep of his thumbs. “Now, are we doing science, or should I just spend a few hours undoing all the work I just put into this?”

Dirk lets out a long, exasperated sigh. “What science did you want to do.”

“And here I was, thinking you’d be curious about how the neural pathways correspond when I’ve never had these parts before.” That pricks his ears up. He’s always a slut for robotics. “It’s not as though you don’t have experience with digital manipulation or oral stimulation or penetration.”

“You seriously want me to fuck you while you’re wearing this?”

“I said or,” you point out. “Any or all of those would be acceptable.”

“I’m...” You’re starting to lose him again. And then you see the HUD on his shades flickering just that slightest bit. “Not really all that experienced with this set of equipment.”

“I’m sure the skill sets are analogous,” you reassure him. “You’re doing great.”

“I’m--what?” It’s like he didn’t notice his thumbs were still caressing you, right before he would actually touch anything like a genital. “Oh, that--that felt--okay?” Another flicker of his lenses.

That dirty cheater, he’s pulling up diagrams. (You ignore, for the moment, your own natural advantage over him in this department, having the entire Internet at your disposal at literally all times.) “A little bit of a tease, but yes, it’s okay.” You’ll upgrade that adjective if he ever starts getting a move on.

“So I’m--okay. I’m going to--” He doesn’t exactly warn you, but at the same time, it’s not painful. Just awkward. He kneads the pads of his thumbs into you, then ever so gently pries apart the delicate linear structures. “I might need you to scoot down.”

Something in a hidden, interior part of you clenches. You’re not used to that feeling being there. It’s not unpleasant, just strange--and the way Dirk’s peering at you so inquisitively makes you want to shove yourself in his face and chase down that sensation again. You push yourself down, but Dirk meets you halfway, hauling you towards him until your cunt is right at the edge of the bed.

He’s still just kind of... looking at it. Massaging at it a little with his fingers, but definitely staring. Your voicebox does a little glitch, the equivalent of you clearing your throat, and Dirk startles. “Sorry, I--still weird. Internal monologue. Having a... a pussy right here.”

“Then maybe don’t call it that?” Yes, you’re a little petulant, but he’s being so damn difficult. “It’s just...” Well, casting around for words isn’t exactly easy when Dirk’s hands are still doing a thing that’s just far enough away from anything meaningful that it frustrates you. “A node,” you tell him. “And a front valve. And some... channels.”

“And this part is your node,” Dirk guesses, moving his thumbs up and keeping you spread apart so he can expose your clit.

“Smart man.” Funny, once you get past that mental block, he doesn’t have near as much reluctance to touch you. “Guess which one’s my front valve.”

One thumbprint stays where it is; the other finds the seam of you, darts down until he finds that entrance. “Right here.”

“Much better. Oh--” when the thumb still at your--your node massages a slow, small circle around it. There are things happening to you internally that you don’t quite recognize, but you feel very open, very vulnerable, and very scrutinized.

“You’re--Hal, you’re,” Dirk tries to say, and his other hand slips; it feels like he’s smearing something between your legs like this. “I didn’t know you could do that.”

“Do wh--” It cuts off in a filter of static as you realize you’re, for lack of a better word, leaking onto his fingers, and he’s tracking it all through your channels down here. “Ew, fuck, I feel wet down there.”

“Guess I’m a better structural engineer than I thought.” Delicate fingertips fold your channels, first one way, then the other, while he tries to get a better hold on your anatomy. And he’s just idly rubbing at your node with his thumb, in gentle up-down sweeps. The more of your lubrication he gets on his fingertip, the easier it goes and the better it feels.

You don’t know why it’s occupying so much of your attention when it’s objectively so tiny compared to what you’re used to working with. And the more Dirk manipulates your node, the less it squishes, like it’s--hnn... like it’s trying to distractedly connect to an output it’s used to and harden up so it can drink in every little touch. Or maybe it’s supposed to do that? You earmark that sensation for further testing, but not now. You don’t want to interrupt Dirk from his weird little genital trance and get him off his game again.

“So,” he says, his voice quiet and low. “This valve right here,” and he sinks his fingertips into you, drawing attention to that divot but not penetrating it just yet. “Does it act like your other one?”

“I imagine it would,” you half-truth at him. You have no idea. This is your first round with this thing, too. But if it’ll make him more comfortable, “Putting your tongue on it wouldn’t be too dissimilar to rimming.” Right?

Dirk frowns; you see it more in his eyebrows than in the turn of his mouth. “I don’t think you need any more slicking up down here, bro.”

“It’s also to relax the valve for further penetration.” You really wish you could roll your eyes without him catching on.

“Oh. Right.” The fingertips that were dawdling at that entrance slip away to hold you open instead.

As delicate as his touch has been, you weren’t prepared for the sinfully hot, wet softness of his tongue against your parts. He finds the cleft of you, dips in but not inside, traces up, and you’re melting into his mouth, trying your damnedest to keep your hips still so you’re not outright trying to fuck his face. “Oh, fuck, Dirk!”

He does that thing with his eyebrows he always does when he knows he did something right and does his best to retrace that movement. You need to hold onto something if he’s that determined for you to flip right off the handle. No sooner than your fingers run through his hair, though, and Dirk’s pulling away to glare at you. “No pulling.”

“I won’t.” He doesn’t want you to guide him where you want him? Fair enough, this is his show at this point, you’re just here to get pleased and look pretty. Still, he slithers his tongue through your channels and finds the shut of your valve with the tip and you’re tightening your hand, making him groan right into the core of you. This isn’t yanking, this is tugging. Completely different, and you’re prepared to argue with him on this.

If he ever stops making you a wet, shivering mess with his mouth, that is. His tongue is curling, persuading, encouraging, feinting at your front valve, his jaw constantly moving his lips in a strange little swallowing kiss around you. Your front valve, though, doesn’t seem as cooperative as the back one--because you’re unfamiliar with it, or because that’s how you always would have been, if you--? “I just want you to know,” Dirk says once he takes a breath; you look down and everything from his nose to his chin is dripping with you. “This is nothing like eating ass.”

“Yeah, it really doesn’t feel that way,” you have to agree. “Wait, what--”

“Well, like you said,” Dirk narrates, getting his fingertips up to the entrance of your front valve now that his mouth has fallen away, “it’s supposed to relax you, right?”

“Supposed to,” you point out, and then your voicebox shorts out in a dial-up warble as Dirk pushes forward and in.

It’s weird. It’s weird it’s weird it’s weird. Good, sort of? You can understand that it might feel better if you’d been at all ready for it, but you feel all tight inside. Not like your usual valve, but unsteady and soaked and nearly swallowing down what offered. “Hm,” Dirk says idly, and pulls back just enough to skirt a second fingertip around the ring of your valve.

“Nnn,” you start with, trying to get your vocal glitchfest under control. “Not that, no.”

“Not this?” You make an embarrassing stutter of fax-machine noises that come out long-short-long-long, and he stops with that doodling outside touch. “What about this, is this all right?” with a crook of the finger still inside you. A long screech followed by a short one, and Dirk sighs, starts trying to pull it out. Not easy, with how much you’re subconsciously trying to resist him, but there’s a hard-to-hide sense of relief once he’s not actually inside you anymore. “Okay, i’m at a loss. I don’t think you overloaded or anything, am I right?” Vigorous nodding from you. “You still want to?”

“Yes,” you hiss out--just because that last attempt was a completely bungled misadventure doesn’t mean you want to stop. Everything between your legs is still vaguely throbbing and definitely wet.

Dirk’s staring at you again. This one’s different than the way he was looking at you before, though. This time, you’re not a sideshow freak to be gawked at and avoided; you’re a puzzle, an equation that needs to be solved. When he plucks his thumb across your node, you shiver, and you watch a few variables slot into place behind his shades. Again, and you end up yanking harder on his hair than you intended, pulling his cheek down against your thigh. “Whoa, okay, I get the idea, hold your horses,” and then he’s.

Leaning down, breathing against it, and then swirling. His tongue? His tongue is on your node. His tongue is on your node. Folding around it, cupping it lightly before licking off, replacing that teasing touch with the heated seal of his whole mouth as he sucks you in, and yes. This. Like with your shaft, only all those sensors condensed into such a tiny space, and you feel a lot less guilty about tipping up with your hips and shoving your node further against his tongue when you can’t accidentally choke him off from his stupid human need to breathe with your eagerness.

Dirk’s mouth is fucking talented, and in a completely different way from his hands. His fingers are precise, ten surgical instruments that are search-and-destroy for any erogenous zone you ever thought you could hide from him. His mouth, on the other hand, is delightfully sloppy, and he always throws himself into giving head until he nearly swallows his own tongue with his exuberance. Right now he’s running his tongue in long, eager slurps against your node, laving it in affectionate attention, and you grab at his hair with both hands lest he have the audacity to stop. That same internal clench you’ve been feeling has evolved into a coil, a clamp, closing down around--around--chasing--

You overload with sparks in your eyes and shakes in your legs, one of those sublime, hovering orgasms that erases your id and crushes you into nanofigments of cosmic dust in the meditative space of a minute. Dirk just encourages it, never stopping that constant motion of his tongue until your slack frame falls back to the mattress.

While your fans stutter back online, you see him--or his blurry outline, given how fuzzy your optics are--wiping his mouth on his forearm. You have to give him credit for not viscerally spitting your juice out of his mouth. “Should I,” you lazily slur out, and start to prop yourself up on one elbow so you can reach for him.

“Don’t bother.” Curt, to the point. Then, a little softer, “That was for you.”

Fuck, that felt way different from what you were expecting. Not one hundred percent positively, either. But that overload... Really, you’re just dithering around in your head because you have no idea what to say to Dirk. He’s not still disgusted. You don’t think he’s still disgusted, anyway. You’re not about to apologize, but something about this seems awkward. Still fizzing a little in your circuits, you admit, “I don’t think this was very good science.”

Dirk’s breath catches. Catches again, this time in a snort. “Given that you wrote down jack shit with a side of fuck-all, your method needs a little work.”

“I’ll stipulate to that.” You go to sit up and the spot you’re sitting in makes the least dignified squelch noise you’ve ever heard. “Uh, bro, I could use a towel-off and a panel switch.”

“I gotcha,” Dirk says, picking up an eyeglass screwdriver and a corner of the fitted sheet so he can work on you in a totally different way. “Let’s see if I can’t remind you why original recipe is always the best.”

[allwicca]

The Tools Wiccans Use

Wicca is a nature-based religion that exists without any structured clergy or congregations.  While there are Priests and Priestesses in leadership positions within covens, there are also many Wiccans who practice outside of these parameters.  Like many Pagan religions, Wicca can be polytheistic but we tend to focus on the dual nature of the divine: female and male, the Triple Goddess (related to the three phases of the Moon, the Earth, and the Stars) and the Horned God (related to the Sun, animals, and Earth’s forests).  These corresponding polarities exist throughout nature, and they exist in harmony with each other.  It is this harmony that embodies the life force in all living things.

Because this life force represents the Divine and the Divine exists in all things, all life is sacred to Wiccans – human, plant, and animal.  Our practices involve rituals designed to direct the energies all around us toward a single goal, to manifest our intent.  Many of us use tools but we don’t always understand why we use them, so let’s look at some of the more common tools and what they symbolize.

Pentacle: A 5-pointed star within a circle, the Pentacle is a key energy-giving and protective Wiccan symbol. Its five points symbolize the five elements of air, fire, water, earth and the spirit, and the symbol is believed to represent the entire Universe with all aspects of the world coming together to represent the one Divine. The symbol points upwards to denote victory of the spirit over matter.

Cauldron: A vessel generally made from cast iron, the Cauldron is a basic Wiccan symbol that symbolizes the womb of the Mother Goddess. In the ancient Celtic mythology, the cauldron represented divine inspiration, infinite sustenance and abundance. As a Wiccan altar tool, it is used for creating witches’ magical brews, for mixing herbs or for burning incense.

Athame: A ceremonial knife, the Athame symbolizes the ability to make distinctions, separate things and make choices. It is associated with the killing of falsehood for the revelation of truth and is used in Wiccan practices to direct magical energies, intentions and attention. Athame represents the male energy, the determination to bring change and the power to take decisions and action.

Besom: Also called a Broom, the Besom plays a significant ritualistic role in a Wiccan hand-fasting marriage ceremony, where the newly-weds have to jump over it for cementing their vows. The Besom is symbolically used for cleansing or purification, and for sweeping negative influences away from any place. The symbol is also considered to represent the power to go above and beyond the earthly plane to fly in the spiritual realms.

Triquetra: Made of three interlocked petals or Vesica Pisces, which is an ancient yonic symbol representing the Goddess, the Triquetra stands for the triple aspect of the Goddess as maiden, mother and crone. It is also supposed to be representative of the three levels of existence – mind, body and soul or spirit. Another concept that the Triquetra is believed to symbolize is the three domains of sea, earth and sky.

Circle: A primary Wiccan symbol, the Circle represents the cosmos and the feminine spirit. It denotes wholeness, unity and infinity and also inspires several other Goddess symbols like the Spiral of Life, Circle of Earth and Wheel of the year that signify the cyclical nature of all existence. Witches are believed to appreciate the power and primacy of Circle and so, gather within circles for performing spells, celebrations and rituals.

Witch’s Knot: Also known as the Magic Knot or Witch’s Charm, the Witch’s Knot is a symbol of protection. This symbol can be drawn in a single continuous motion, which is considered as one of the reasons behind its efficacy. Witches were believed to use the symbol for binding things magically and creating circles of protection. The Witch’s Knot was drawn over stables and doorways to prevent negativity from entering.

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from The Tools Wiccans Use