#yongbok with his knees out

[anotherdescentintomadness]

Still one of my favorites 🕷🖤

VENOM (거미줄) STRAY KIDS, 2022

[bandgie]

More Please | Armageddon Event

Request: Greed | Christopher Bahng-Chan by anon song!

warnings: MDNI18+, fem!reader, exhibitionism!, pussy play, fingering, oral mentions (f!), sex flashbacks, double date w/ Changlix, piv mentions

notes! this song better be released because wtf? he can't drop that and dip

When his hand rests on your knee, you don’t overthink it. Chan is a physical lover in every sense. He needs you next to him. Close to him. He just has to know that you’re here, real, and safe.

But when his fingers trail to your lower thigh, you raise an eyebrow.

A silent question since you two are on a double date. Changbin and Felix love telling the story of how they met. Well, Felix does. Changbin only blushes and says ‘it didn’t happen like that’ more times than once. Perhaps Chan is invested in this new version of the story because he doesn’t seem to notice how you glance at him.

Whatever, you’re thinking too much. Chan got more than enough loving before you two left for dinner. The dress, your boyfriend claims, is all to blame. The way it accentuates your hips and makes the top of your breasts pop is sublime.

Sure, it’s cute. A simple floral gown that Chan tied and untied more times than you can count while getting ready. You had to cover the fresh bruises on your neck with so much concealer you think Felix can figure out why that specific spot is so yellow.

But it doesn't matter too much. You don’t regret being a few minutes late in the slightest. Chan is hardly the type for a quickie, so sex with him is always intense. It was only half an hour ago that the hair he styled for tonight was messy from your pulling. The shade of your lipstick was smeared on your face and his own. You doubt there was enough time to clean the pecks you left on his thighs.

And when he was between your legs, you were sure the dress he claimed was so pretty would get ruined. But Chan still insisted on keeping it on, opting to eat your cunt from under the material.

I’ll be careful.

You look down at your thighs upon the memory. You could see it now if you tried, the bobbing of his head making the fabric bounce. Something was alluring about seeing him, but not quite. The fact that you could hear and feel his mouth sucking only heightened the pleasure. You didn’t know what he was going to do next and you were more than eager to find out.

“Ya! Yongbok, you’re embarrassing me!” Changbin’s voice booms in the restaurant. His volume is something you four have grown accustomed to, but with your imagination running wild, you couldn’t help but jump.

Felix smiles, all teeth and pride. “That’s what I love about you though! It’s okay that you’re allergic to wood.”

You smile with them, but it doesn’t reach your eyes. Not when all you think about is how Chan’s fingers are creeping between your legs and making your thighs tense.

And this time when you do look at him, he looks back. “You okay?” His eyes have a certain gleam in them. “You look like you’re thinking about something.”

That little shit. He is doing this on purpose.

“Nothing.” You can play his little game. “Nothing at all.”

His smirk tells you that he catches on. “Hm. I just couldn’t help but notice that you looked…deep in thought.”

Chan squeezes your thigh. Not hard in the slightest, but possessively. The same way he grips your legs when they’re over his shoulders. When he has to find leverage being on top, fingers digging into the underside of your thighs to keep you still and him upright.

“Ooo, I thought so too.” Felix's wide eyes blink innocently. “I thought you were being quiet. What’s on your mind, babe? Is Channie-hyung bothering you?”

Babe. Chan called you babe not too long ago.

His mouth was latched onto your pussy so good the slick started to run down his chin. He was eating like a starved man, greedy for more and more until you were shaking and oozing cum. Chan swallowed everything you gave him, gulping and licking his lips whenever he pulled away to catch his breath. You can still picture the messy curls from under your dress and how his eyes peeked over the material almost in a frenzy.

Fuck, babe, you taste so good.

Clearing your throat is the only way to make the memories fizzle into nothing but the arousal in your stomach. “When isn’t he bothering me? I don’t know how I’ve managed to put up with him for so long.”

Changbin laughs. Both at your words and Chan’s blushing face. Felix only agrees, stating how bothersome your lover used to be back in pre-debut days. 

“Ah, but you like it when I’m annoying, don’t you, baby?” Chan’s ears twinge with red, but his fluster doesn’t stop his fingers from prying your legs and finally finding the space he’s been aiming for. “You like it enough to stay with me, hm?”

His touches are soft on your cunt. The tips of his fingers brushing against your clit so sweetly it almost feels like a massage.

The buzz in your pussy spreads throughout your body. It’s warm and comforting, and all you can reply is, “Whatever.”

The conversation stirs to Changbin talking about a track he’s making; asking his hyung for advice on mixing and sampling. Chan answers as though he’s not playing with your folds through your underwear.

It was easy enough to listen in the beginning. All you had to do was nod and hum in agreement, but when Chan’s fingers prodded your clit and your clit only, you jolted.

No one seemed to notice. Felix was too entranced in his boyfriend to see how your jaw had slacked open and your eyes nearly crossed from Chan’s fingers.

And when he slid down, he could feel how wet you were getting through your panties. Chan could only imagine how swollen your cunt is from his lips, fingers, and cock. Neither of you thought there’d be enough juice left to get horny, but the slick on his fingers and your underwear shows how possible that is.

The pads of Chan’s fingers rub slow circles on your entrance. It leaves his digits warm and a little wet, and he uses that to trail back up to play with the peak of your clit. If you focus hard enough, you could make out the soft sounds of squishing and slicking from your pussy.

It’s barely audible, but Changbin’s booming voice easily overshadows it. 

Breathe. You have to remind yourself to breathe. Your moans force themselves into quiet puffs of air. Maybe to the couple across, it just looks like you’re catching your breath from eating, but everything feels so obvious. From the licking of your lips to the slight movement in Chan’s shoulder, you think Felix and Changbin have to know what’s happening under the table.

Then your boyfriend adjusts in his seat. You envision his fingers slipping away for a moment, but the exact opposite happens. Chan uses the movement to his advantage, making the slide into your underwear unbelievably smooth.

And gosh, his fingers are even warmer like this. You thought they’d be cold from the air, but being attached to your cunt even with the panties in the way kept them hot. The ridges of his knuckles glide perfectly over your clit and you can’t help the way your hips buck.

“Fuck! I-sorry.” They’re looking at you. Their eyes feel heavy - watchful. You look to Chan for help, but he only has a clueless look in his eyes that makes you want to strangle him. “I thought I felt something crawl on my leg.”

Changbin pales. “Don’t say that! Are you serious?”

You shake your head. “It was just my-” Chan slips a finger in, deep, thick, and welcomed. You suck in a sharp breath. “My imagination. Sorry.”

“Here. I’ll check.” Chan lifts the tablecloth. You have to pinch your lips together from gasping, pretending that Chan’s finger isn’t digging into your cunt for a waiter who decides to check in on your four to see.

He hums, fully acting as if he’s thoroughly searching.

Then a second finger finds its way inside. He even goes as far as to lean down, pretending to look under the table when you feel a string of warm saliva hit your cunt.

Breathe. In. Out. In. Out.

And his fingers are doing the same. They barely thrust to not make it obvious, but it so is. How can he possibly be hungry for more when he was just-

“Nope. I don’t see anything.” Chan’s face is red. You know his friends will write it off from being upside down, but you know the blood rushing to his face is the same reason his cock is straining uncomfortably in his jeans.

“I think my jagiya is getting tired. Should we go home soon?”

It doesn’t matter how good his fingers hit your sensitive spot. How the hard part of his palm rubs just perfectly on your clit. You won’t ever give him the satisfaction.“I don’t know. I think I’m feeling wide awake.”

The smile on his face says it all. You’re definitely getting it rough tonight.

Again.

“Yeah. You know what? I do need to finish that stupid album.” Changbin groans in annoyance. “I really wanted to have seconds too.”

Felix giggles at his lover - praising him for eating so well when you’re the one that’s stuffed to the brim. Chan nods, “Yeah, that sounds good. Plus, I think we have dessert at the house, right baby? You want a little more?”

Little shit. He hardly uses his flirty voice, but it makes you clench around him anyway.

You suppose you’ll let him indulge in you a bit longer. “Please.”

[skzms]

🌊 ೃ‧₊◜ sea may rise, sky may fall epilogue

pairing: lee know x f!reader x han jisung

summary: felix tells us about his life, the crew, the year han yujun was vanquished, and the year after that. about the crew, the captain, minho and jisung, and his own life

word count: 11.6k

warnings: homophobia; religious themes and trauma; one mention of suicial ideation and drinking as coping; references to prostitution (good and bad) and attempted assault (nothing too graphic); violence and murder, as always; ace!felix 🖤🩶🤍💜

author's note: and here we are <3 the official end of sea may rise, sky may fall. thank you thank you thank you again for all your love on this series, every single comment, message, DM. they all mean the world to me. my biggest project ever, my soul project, it means everything to me. so thank you for following along <3 and a very, very special thank you to @xenteaart for providing me a necessary second perspective on felix's story! also for her beautiful thoughts on Minho's kitties that I consider canon now oh and it's too long again hahahah I'm just a humble fanfic writer, let me write about them happy. love you all!

this series is 🔞, so minors, please DNI

series masterlist // skzms masterlist

< interlude - THE END

Hi, my name’s Lee Felix, and I’m part of a crew of privateers. Their cook, actually.

That’s how I would greet people if I ever met new people any more, but I rarely do. And if I do, our captain is usually the one who steps up, all confidence and sharp eyes, and does the talking for us. I don’t mind it, I’ve met enough people I wish I hadn’t for a lifetime. I’m happy with my crew, my friends.

Some of those friends of mine call me Yongbok. I’m not sure why. I mean, that’s also my name, but it was a random tidbit I told them once that I thought they would forget about; that whoever my mother was wrote the name on a piece of paper and attached it to the basket she abandoned me at the church gates in.

It’s not like I hate it, not at all. I don’t hate much any more. I used to hate a lot.

Though for the first few years of my life I didn’t. I was a happy child, obsessed with the flower garden behind the church in Nassau where I grew up, spending days and days outside, playing with the local kids, enjoying the attention of everyone who came to the church to talk to the vicar, who they told what a beautiful child I was, what a blessing from God I was.

I was happy because I thought I was loved. But when I turned 14, I realised that I wasn’t. That all I was for the vicar was a project. A project, a challenge sent by God, to turn the little godless, hopeless, bastard boy who was dropped on his doorstep into a devout follower who never asked any questions. But I wasn’t. Looking back, I knew I could never have been what he thought I needed to be. But the thing that tipped the scales against me was when I fell in love with the baker’s son when I was 14 and the vicar found him on his knees in front of me behind the tool shed.

He made me feel every single thing I was not with every crack of his palm across my face. The violence, his words – they all made me realise that, all this time, everything I had thought was fatherly affection was actually a maniacal striving to please a God that didn’t exist. I almost ended my life that night. But stubbornness kept me alive. Then and for the next years, when it felt like my fate was sealed.

Because I grew up all angles, except where it mattered. Big eyes and full lips. Lithe little body that everyone wanted. Blonde hair that I let grow out in an act of defiance until the vicar dragged me into his study and chopped it all off with his rusty scissors. But I just let it grow out again.

He finally threw me out when he caught a visiting pastor make eyes at me. Told me I was sent to him by satan. A succubus, a temptress, a vile being. He didn’t even let me get my things, chased me out of his house in the middle of the night. I ran until I couldn’t any more. I slept in the woods that night, shivering and hungry, but by the time morning came, I knew I was going to do whatever I had to do to survive.

That’s how I ended up at the Crimson Pearl. And really, in the beginning it wasn’t so bad. I knew people wanted me, saw my body as something desirable, and sex never meant much to me, anyway.

The working conditions and the pay weren’t bad, and when I figured out which clients would tip well and which should be avoided, I settled into a fine life there. I even found some friends amongst the other prostitutes, as much as it was possible when every day was a fight for survival. But most importantly, I had independence, a roof over my head and a warm meal every day, and I was far, far away from my vicious adopted father. Though I saw him once. At the brothel, slipping into the room with one of the other boys. I drank myself to sleep that night.

But then the owner of the Crimson Pearl was murdered in his home one night, and his successor was a drunk monster. He would come in late, when the sun had already long set, half drunk, ignoring our complaints of dirty sheets and lack of soap. He would get progressively drunker throughout the night until all he did was sit and complain and “sample the wares” to “ensure the quality of the merchandise” as he called it – as he slept with any of us that he wanted, as roughly and meanly as he wanted. Charging patrons for our services became less and less of a priority the later it got, especially when late at night, his friends came in, and he happily invited them to pick whichever one of us to have their way with, ruthlessly, mercilessly – and without paying, of course.

And mostly, we were able to stick together, get the worst patrons out, protect each other, but then the new owner realised what we were doing, and he became very angry. From then on, none of us were allowed to help each other any more. We were forced to sit there, to listen, and if any of us moved, he would hurt us. It was torture.

I somehow managed to avoid being picked by the worst of them for weeks, until I couldn’t, when one of his buddies locked eyes with me and the owner ordered me to take him to my room. I knew that this would be change everything - if I managed to survive. I was terrified, but God, did I put up a fight. But he was too strong. He hurt me and I panicked and I screamed, screamed for someone, anyone, even though I knew none of my friends would help, could help, and I prayed, prayed to the God I didn’t believe in any more to do something, anything–

And then the door flew open, and the captain rushed in like a vengeful angel, dragged the man off me as if he didn’t weigh a thing, shoved him into the wall so hard the whole house rattled. Someone dragged him out, took him away, but all I could see was the captain. She approached me carefully, dressed me quickly, but gently, wrapped me in her coat and led me outside.

Later, they told me it was Minho who had pinned the man to the wall before dragging him outside. Changbin, who held the owner at gunpoint while the others went through the other rooms. They gutted the Crimson Pearl, divided the scant takings between the other working boys and girls so they could run, put up somewhere for a while, while they found new jobs. They killed the owner and all of his friends who had been tormenting us for years in the alley behind the brothel, leaving them in the dirt to die. I felt sick with hatred and satisfaction and gratitude.

But I didn’t notice any of that at the time. I was dazed and in pain, shivering, the captain’s coat only helping so much in the cold breeze. And I remember the captain’s eyes, the kindest ones I’d ever seen, asking me all kinds of questions, like if I was okay, if I could walk, if I needed a doctor, if I had anywhere to go. I did my best to answer her through the shivers and the tears and the captain took one long look at me before she asked me the question that would change my life.

“Do you want to join us, Felix? Or at least stay with us for then night? We will keep you safe.”

And that’s all it took, then, for me to say yes. But to be honest, I would’ve said yes to anyone in that moment, if it meant escaping the hopelessness of my life.

To her credit, she asked me again the next night, when she called me to her quarters – after I slept, washed, got some food in me, was in a better condition to make life-changing decisions. She asked me again, told me there was space for me on her crew, but also let me know in no uncertain terms that I could leave whenever I wanted. But if life had taught me anything, it was that nothing in this life was free. So I asked her what I needed to do to earn my keep on the ship, she had just shrugged her shoulders.

“Whatever you want, whatever you can do.”

A searing sense of disappointment had rocketed down my spine, and she must’ve been able to see it on my face.

“Felix? What’s wrong?” she asked, confused, concerned, so, so kindly.

“I don’t want to sell my body any more,” I somehow managed to whisper before the tears overtook me and made me crumble into myself like a house of cards. I hadn’t noticed until just then how much I had hoped I could stay. Because the last 24 hours had been the first in a long time when nobody tried to touch me or talk to me or sell my body – when I felt somewhat safe.

She approached me carefully, asked me if she could touch me, a gesture so kind it made me cry harder, but I nodded, and she placed two strong, comforting hands on my shoulders, kneading my muscles, brushing her thumbs over my skin in regular circles until it grounded me a little.

“You don’t have to, Felix, never again. We would never ask that of you,” she murmured, lowly, calmly, and I had sobbed even harder. It’s a miracle now, looking back, how calm she stayed, faced with the broken shell of a boy in front of her. But she’s incredible like that. But back then, I didn’t even know how broken I was.

“But there’s nothing else I can do. I can’t fight, I never went to school. I’m useless to you if it’s not for my body.”

The captain had looked at me with so much pain in her eyes and shaken her head with determination.

“Don’t talk like that. I’m sure there’s something you can do. What do you do for fun?”

It was such an unexpected question at that moment, something nobody had ever bothered to ask me before, and it shook me out of my breakdown a little.

I said the only thing I could think of.

“I like to cook?”

And the captain had broken out into a huge smile.

“That’s perfect! We actually need someone to work in our kitchen. We’ve been doing a rotation and let me tell you, some weeks are definitely rougher than others.”

Her tone was so light, so hopeful, that I couldn’t help but latch on.

“Yeah? Why?”

She gave me a pained smile.

“Chan tried to make scrambled eggs the other week, and it ended up being just a dry brick. And the week after that Changbin put so much pepper in the stew it was inedible. He was nearly chased off the gangplank by 20 hungry pirates.”

I couldn’t help but giggle. The way she talked about them, like they weren’t just her crew, but like they were friends – it gave me so much hope.

“I …” I started, gathered all the courage that was left in my brittle body, “I make really nice scrambled eggs. The other … working boys and girls always said so. The … uh, never mind.”

But the captain just kept looking at me steadily and gave me an encouraging nod.

“No, please, tell me!”

I huffed out an awkward, broken little laugh. I felt stupid, but I felt like I had nothing more to lose.

“It’s … uh … the secret is to … add a little milk. Make them over low heat. Makes them all … silky. And if you have herbs, it really … it’s really nice.”

I’ll never forget the smile on the captain’s face when I finally raised my head. She clapped her hands happily.

“Oh, I’m so happy you’re here,” she exclaimed, jumped to her feet from where she was still crouching next to me. “I don’t know how much longer I would’ve survived Chan or Changbin’s weeks. You will make all of us very, very happy.”

She stretched out her hand to me, calmly waited for me to take it and helped me up. I swayed a little, but I managed to steady myself a little, scrub the tears off my cheeks.

“Why don’t you talk to Hyunjin later, let him know whatever you might need for, let’s say, two weeks at sea? And then he can get it before we set off.”

I nodded dumbly, and slowly turned to leave. But before I reached the door, I remembered something that had left me no peace.

“Captain?” I asked, and she hummed in response, all her attention back on me, “I … I saw … the cabin … I mean, it has two beds …”

She blinked at me, clearly not understanding, and I realised I needed to be brave one more time. She made me believe it would be okay.

“Will I have to share my cabin with someone?”

She gave me a long look, until her eyes widened in recognition. But the pity I feared would appear on her face never came. Instead, she smiled.

“Only if you want to.”

I took the deepest breath yet.

“I … if it’s possible at all, I … I really don’t want to.”

And she just nodded, gave me another smile before she turned back to her desk. “Then you won’t.”

From that day onwards, that cabin was my home. The next day, when I came back from my nervous, quick trip to the baths, I found a key, placed perfectly in the middle of my pillow. It was the key to the cabin door.

And I did lock the door for weeks, until I managed to leave it unlocked for one or two nights at a time without having a panic attack. Then three. Then four. Until one day I realised I had forgotten about the key entirely. I was safe.

And I never did have a roommate, for all the years I was on the ship. I was never asked to share, never even asked why I was the only one with no bunkmate, which was something I very quickly realised I was alone in.

Until the day Han Jisung arrived, and I saw the fear in his eyes when he saw the two bunks and I felt like I was looking in a cruel, warped mirror at my past, broken self. Hyunjin had whispered it to me, when he got back from the captain, that he was to get his own cabin as well, with a key, for the same reason I did, but something told me to do what I had never considered before – to offer him the second bunk in my room. Because Jisung seemed scared. Lost. Safe. And like he could really use a friend.

And I mean, he really did need a friend, that’s what we all learned. The day he set foot on our ship, a year and a half ago, started like any other. The sun rose on a cloudless sky, there was a stiff east wind. We intercepted one of Han Yujun’s ships only an hour after breakfast. It was way off course of its regular route and basically fell right into our lap. Everything seemed simple, like a routine.

But it quickly became very clear that this crew was different from his usual ones. The men were ruthless, angry, and overestimated themselves – but that was par of the course for the type of men Han Yujun hired. What was weird was how entirely aimless and uncoordinated they were. What was even weirder, was that their captain was nowhere to be seen.

And just when we thought that maybe he was hiding in the ship, or they just didn’t have one, a young man strutted into the middle of the fight.

It was clear from the first second that whoever he was, he was not like his crew. His boots were clean and expensive looking, his features were elegant, his skin soft and unmarred, and he was wearing an emerald green silk jacket that was entirely inappropriate for life on a ship.

That, and none of his crew paid him any mind. Worse, one of them laughed right into his face, and even tried to shove him into our swords, something that made the elegantly dressed captain draw his sword and raise it against his own crew member, something that was so entirely unheard of, it was almost laughable.

It was Minho who ordered Chan and Changbin to take that one hostage. There was a glint in his eye as he turned to the captain. They looked at each other, did their weird little telepathic communication thing, and the moment passed.

The man put up a good fight, a much better one than we thought he would be able to, based on his looks, but, like they usually did, in the end, he lost, and he was dragged, kicking and screaming, into the hold of our ship, while we dealt with the rest.

Nothing else was out of the ordinary about the clean-up, raiding of the other ship, where I ended up getting a less than impressive haul of their leftover provisions that were clearly of the cheapest kind – until Chan came running in while Hyunjin was helping me peel potatoes a day later exclaiming that the guy they had captured was none other than Han Yujun’s nephew. And that the captain had just offered him a spot on the crew.

It was an outrage. Hyunjin couldn’t believe it. He kept asking Chan if he was sure, asking him to repeat over and over again what he heard, but it always ended up the same. The man in the emerald silk jacket’s name was Han Jisung, nephew of Han Yujun, the man we had been holding Andros and the surrounding islands in a violent political and criminal chokehold, the man we had been working for years to take down. And the captain had offered him a place among us. Hyunjin was immediately against it, huffed and puffed, talked of going to the captain to talk her out of it, but Chan stopped him, somehow. He calmly talked to him until Hyunjin no longer looked he was about run out the door. But he was by no means done.

“Do you think he’ll accept the captain’s offer?” Hyunjin asked, his arms crossed over his chest, a petulant scowl on his face.

Chan shrugged.

“I think he might, but he’s stubborn. Kind of arrogant.”

Hyunjin narrowed his eyes further and Chan sighed.

“But come on, Hyune, imagine how much he knows. He could be the last piece of the puzzle, we could finally get Han Yujun …”

And as much as I hated it, he had a point. Though, Hyunjin didn’t seem to agree.

“Is that why the captain is asking him to join us? So he can be useful? I’m not harbouring the enemy’s family in my cabins on the off chance we get something out of him before he murders one of us!”

Chan lifted his hands defensively.

“Listen, I’m not saying to trust him, immediately, I will keep an eye on him, but the captain, she kind of seemed convinced and … well, she’s never been wrong.”

Hyunjin grumbled, gave Chan another glare.

“Well, there’s a first time for everything …”

But I could tell his resolve was starting to melt. After all, the captain really had never made a wrong call.

Before he left to go back to the cells, we made Chan promise to find out as much as possible about Jisung in the hours he was set to guard him, and to report anything suspicious back to us.

He came back the next day and, almost sheepishly, told us, that there was nothing suspicious whatsoever about the man. Carefully, he relayed everything Jisung had told him. That his parents were dead, probably killed by his uncle, though he had no proof, so there was nothing he could do. That he had no money to his name beyond what his uncle gave him, no home beyond his uncle’s house, where he was under constant surveillance from the staff. That he was meant to marry some other politician’s daughter, one he had made the mistake of sleeping with a few times, and who had consequently blackmailed him into agreeing to the marriage ploy her father and his uncle had hatched, by telling him she was pregnant, only for him to find out that she wasn’t.

Hyunjin was still a little wary, told Chan it was weird that he just told him all of this, but Chan looked almost sad. He kept insisting that something was different about Han Jisung, that he seemed … real. That he looked so sad when he spoke about his parents. That he called them Eomma and Appa, as well, just like Chan back in the day. That there had been tears in his eyes when he spoke of them. Hyunjin eventually came around, though not before he made Chan promise to keep a tight watch on him. I … didn’t know what I thought. I had seen Jisung, on the day he was captured, and I saw how his crew treated him, so what Chan told us did line up. But nonetheless – Han Yujun was his family. There was no knowing what he was like, what he thought, what he believed in. Hell, he may have no plans of dismantling his uncle’s empire. Maybe he just wanted to inherit it.

So I was pretty much dead set on keeping my distance, on being very careful and going to the captain if I thought anything at all was off – until Chan brought Jisung to lunch the day he accepted the captain’s offer and I walked out of the kitchen to find not a strange, rugged captain, not an unlikeable aristocrat asshole, not Han Yujun’s nephew, but just … a boy. My age. Deathly pale, looking one stiff breeze away from either vomiting or turning around and running away. So I made a split-second decision. After all, the captain only took one look at me and gave me a chance.

I gave him the most trustworthy, positive smile I could muster, and stretched out my hand.

“Ah, you’re Jisung! So you took the captain’s offer. Welcome. You won’t regret it.”

And I led him to my part of the table, where Hyunjin gave me an incredulous stare, one I returned by motioning to Jisung and furrowing my brows, wordlessly saying look at him! He’s shaking like a leaf.

And it’s really a testament to Jisung’s personality how fast and how entirely he melted Hyunjin within just a few minutes. So much so that, even when he mentioned the captain and Minho fighting, when Minho stormed in, a flavour of anger and self-loathing he only ever exuded when something happened between him and the captain, Hyunjin ended up reassuring Jisung.

And I couldn’t even blame him, because there was something so shockingly, absolutely unexpectedly sincere about the man. I suddenly understood why Chan believed every word he said because Han Jisung seemed to just do that. Tell the truth. His clumsy attempts at returning Changbin and Hyunjin’s banter. His panicked look around when Hyunjin asked him about his sexuality. His genuine, concern and confusion in his big sparkling eyes when Seungmin grilled him about the maps. Every single thing he felt was just right there, his expressive face so revealing, it was simply impossible for him to be lying.

It was also what gave him away a few weeks later, when I caught him staring at the captain across the deck as she talked to Seungmin. Jisung’s expression was nothing short of starstruck, big eyes, flushed cheeks. I didn’t think much of it then, because almost any of us on the crew, who were into women, were infatuated with her at some point. And Jisung, with his round cheeks and his almost puppy-like infatuation with her, didn’t feel threatening in the slightest. Cute, even.

But then we heard of the kiss. Of Chan rounding the corner to Minho, half naked, trapping Jisung’s equally half-dressed body against the wall, Jisung’s tongue in his mouth.

The guilt was radiating off Chan in waves that night, to the point where it drove us fucking crazy. But we couldn’t get it out of him, no matter how often we asked. We only found out what happened two weeks later, when I woke up, docked in Nassau, to Jisung’s bed unslept in, the hazy memory of him disappearing with the captain in my mind and badly contained hangover anxiety buzzing through my veins.

Chan, Hyunjin and Seungmin were already waiting in the kitchen when I walked in and Chan told us everything, spilled it all like he had been waiting for for a long time. What he saw. How he ran to the captain to tell her without a second thought. The look in her eyes. Then, Minho, half-wet and out of his mind, barking at him to leave before he locked himself in with the captain. And through it all, he kept saying that he didn’t know what to do. Kept asking us if it was wrong that he told the captain. But that it was the captain! And Minho … Minho was meant to be faithful. How could Minho betray her?! Minho’s love had always been obvious, it was the captain who clearly kept the distance between them. So it didn’t make any sense for him to do this. And she deserved, to know? Right?

And then there was Jisung. Chan was so disappointed when he told us about pulling Jisung aside after the kiss, how awkward it had been, confronting him. But how Chan had done it, for the captain. And how Jisung had said “I don’t want to break them up” and how angry it had made Chan because how was the outcome of him kissing Minho not going to be him and the captain breaking up?!

But while Chan raged, while Hyunjin bit his bottom lip to shreds, while Seungmin argued with Chan, saying that we shouldn’t meddle in their relationship, whatever it was; that whatever they were or weren’t, wasn’t for us to get involved in – I remembered the way Jisung looked at the captain and suddenly realised that maybe, just maybe, Jisung meant something very different when he said that he didn’t want to break them up.

But it was crazy, unheard of – something that was possible in fiction, or in your wildest dreams, but it didn’t just happen. And the captain and Minho, their relationship wasn’t exactly casual, something that Jisung would just be able to insert himself into. Their bond had been built over years, years of the two of them against the world, locked into the captain’s quarters, Minho’s entire existence dedicated to protecting and serving the captain – the captain’s gaze always returning to Minho, relying on him, needing him. Jisung had just joined. He had no history with either of them. It was madness.

Looking back at it now, I still think I was right. I still think that Jisung was crazy, delusional even, for falling for both of them the way he did. Because he did fall, head over heels, completely crazily and entirely, over such a short period of time. And I told him this, a few months ago, on one of the nights he spent in our cabin, something that had become increasingly rare, most of his nights, and his days, spent with the captain and Minho now (except for meal times. He still faithfully appears in the kitchen every single day, for breakfast, lunch, and dinner prep. Most of the days even on time, unless he stumbles in flushed and dazed, with love bites all over his neck and I have to tell him to go scrub his face and hands and arms, for good measure, before I will even consider letting him get close to something edible, but I digress).

When I told him I thought he was insane, Jisung, dear, sweet, Jisung, had only hidden his face in my pillow, squealed like a teenage girl, before looking at me with stars in his eyes, until I couldn’t remember how I could ever be mad about it.

“I know, Lix … isn’t it crazy? How did this happen?!”

I didn’t tell him this back then, but I truly believe that he was the only person who could’ve done what he did, become what he did, simply because he was Jisung. Jisung, with his heart on his sleeve, Jisung with his pretty face and his little waist and his frankly dangerous arrogance and his shocking ruthlessness and proficiency with a sword – and his inability to tell anything but the truth, without which none of this would’ve ever happened. Because a lesser person would’ve just … shut up. Counted their blessings, kept their feelings to themselves, either left the ship or moved on. But Jisung didn’t. Jisung pushed Minho until he cracked, Jisung kept looking at the captain like she hung the stars in the sky – and then loved Minho so openly and unashamedly that it took Minho months to stop blushing every time Jisung flirted with him in public. Adored the captain with everything he had, never tried to change her, instead met her where she was and with his own love, and his love of Minho and her love, made her soften and bloom in front of all of us.

Not in her treatment of our enemies, oh no, she’s a cold, as murderous, as merciless and violent as ever. But when it’s just us, the crew on the ship, sailing from one port to the next, on the simple cargo delivery jobs we’ve started taking every now and again, dipping our toes into legitimate business in the absence of the region’s most notorious criminal, she was glowing. She, always accompanied by Jisung and Minho, of course, spent more time of her mealtimes in the mess. Stuck around afterwards. Told us stories, countless stories, of her life before us, sometimes aided by Seungmin, when it was something that happened while they were sailing under their old captain. She told us stories of the Americas, of the open ocean, of the Arctic. Of the European shores that she saw but never got to set foot on. Of battles so gruesome, so bloody, the stories alone made us gasp and Minho pale.

It’s nice. We can hear the stories now, because life is peaceful. The seas are safer. We barely ever run into drug or human traffickers any more, and when we do, they’re usually small groups, splintered off what used to be Han Yujun subsidised organisations. They’re easy to eradicate, often relying on only a handful of ships, most of which we intercept, making the business one of astronomical losses that cannot even be offset by the few that escape Jeongin’s watchful eye.

Needless to say, it’s been a good year, since the day Han Yujun died. We sail. We deliver cargo. Patrol the few areas where traffickers and criminals still operate. We’ve even made a tentative peace with the new administration of Andros Island, Han Yujun’s successor, who has allowed us to walk and sail freely after the extent of the crimes Han Yujun had been committing had been revealed. That and I think he’s into the captain. Minho seems to think so, too, because he always finds a reason to go on land with the captain when we dock at Andros. If she’s noticed, I wouldn’t be able to tell. But she doesn’t stop him.

Sometimes we meet the captain’s former captain, mostly in Nassau, where have been going more often since the news of the captain’s victory over Han Yujun has made our crew somewhat of a guest of honour, always guaranteeing us a docking place at the quays, a good price on everything from provisions to fabric, which meant that Hyunjin could finally do the upgrade of all the textiles on the ship, that he’s been wanting for so long – sowing us all new sheets, new curtains, new, more lavish clothing, even buy us sturdier leather boots. For my last birthday, he gave me baby blue sheets, dotted all over with small, hand embroidered daisies. I cried so much it made Hyunjin cry, too, but I think it was happy tears. He blushes every time I walk right past him on laundry day to wash them with my own hands, because I don’t trust anyone else with them. They’re my most prized possession.

But our crew discount also made it impossible for Hyunjin to have a counterargument when Minho one day returned from one of his brooding walks with three kittens in his arms and tears in his eyes, talking about how he had found them behind a fish shop, where the fishmonger was trying to beat them away with a broom. How one of them had a broken leg and how the fishmonger had vowed to kill them if they ever came back, something Minho said we couldn’t let happen.

Not like Hyunjin could’ve resisted him, not when our usual, grumpy, scary Minho was softly cradling a little tabby to his chest, carefully holding his little broken paw in his palm, while two orange kittens were climbing over his shoulders.

Minho bathed them in one of the bathtubs, the water filled only an inch, scrubbing their little limbs and faces, talking to them quietly and not making a fuss when one of them inevitably scratched him.

So Hyunjin sighed, and planned in more provisions. And Minho called them Soonie, Doongie and Dori, and they slept every night in a corner of the captain’s quarters (and sometimes, if one of us was very lucky, in one of our beds), and they became a treasured part of our crew – and Minho’s pride and joy.

And he’s so soft for them, too, cooing and smiling at them, picking them up and carrying them around in his pockets. And I know I talked a lot about Jisung and the captain softening, opening up, but in neither of them has it been as obvious as in Minho. He seems so much happier, so much more at peace, and much less scary and volatile, like something very heavy has finally lifted off his chest. He still gets bitchy, of course he does, he’s our Minho after all, but these days he usually comes around soon enough, mumbles something close enough to an apology or just dumps one of the kitties on our arms as a way of asking for forgiveness.

But, of course, not everything is perfect. The captain still distances herself or locks herself away sometimes, Jisung still has his moments of arrogance, and Minho still broods and scowls and lashes out. It’s just the way it is. I don’t love them any less for it. It just means they’re human. They’re my family, I love them despite it all. And I want them to be well, when they don’t seem to be.

I usually keep an eye on Minho when we dock in Nassau. I don’t think he knows that I know that his mother is buried there. And to be honest, I only know it because I visited the old, dilapidated churchyard the other month, after I heard of my adoptive father, the vicar’s, passing. I went alone, walked the paths of my childhood, even made it into the chapel, down the cool, empty aisle, all the way to the door of the sacristy – though I couldn’t go further. It was like his ghost was still haunting the place, like I would open the door, and he would be there, staring me down. So I turned, pushed through the big, heavy door, out into the balmy autumn air and took a deep, shaky breath. As I was walking through the graveyard, trying to regulate my heartbeat, strolling aimlessly under the cool shade of the sparse pines, one particular grave suddenly caught my eye.

It had no headstone, nothing to mark it except a crooked, rotten wooden cross that barely hung on by a single nail. It stood out like a sore thumb amongst the other, thick, intricately carved headstones. The name was barely legible any more.

Lee Young-mi, 08/11/16–– to 16/10/16––

And sure, it could’ve been a coincidence, but the last name, the date, the year. The shoddily nailed together cross. That and, in retrospect, Minho’s irritability every time we set foot on Nassau. It all made a little too much sense.

And really, Minho’s apprehension had always been visible, I had just always assumed he hated Nassau for all the reasons we all sometimes hated it; because it smelled bad, and because its neutrality provided a safe harbour for us privateers, yes, but also by its very nature did the same for crime and depravity. But now, knowing that his mother was buried there – it was hard not to see how it affected him. How he got quiet, distracted. Often zoned out, scowling at some point in the middle distance.

And usually either Jisung or the captain would find him eventually, and he would soften, his eyes losing some of their darkness, but I still kept an eye on him. Just to be safe.

I do it because I care about him, and deep down, also because I sometimes still have a hard time feeling like I deserve being on the ship. Watching out for Minho, even in just such a small way, makes me feel a little bit more deserving of his fierce protection.

God, this sounds bad, doesn’t it? Like the only reason I care for them is because I feel guilty … But it’s so much more than that, I promise. I love them so deeply.

Like that one night, when I found the captain on the deck, during the two weeks we thought we lost Minho and Jisung, on our way to Andros to end it all – I meant it when I said she should let herself love them when we found them. I remember my own hopelessness, trying to shove it aside so I could help her push through, because I couldn’t stand the knowledge that she, who had done everything for us, was there in front of me, falling apart because she lost the one thing she always wanted but always denied herself.

Because our captain’s life had always been dedicated to us. To taking us in, giving us a home and a job and a purpose. Then to lead us towards a common goal. Working tirelessly, putting herself on the line time and time again, risking her life to keep us safe. The sacrifices she made for all of those years, to keep us safe and on track – they were never a secret. No, she never spoke about them, but it was obvious.

So when I told her to let herself love them, loudly and openly, what I really wanted to say was “you’ve sacrificed everything for us, so many times. Let yourself have this. We want you to have this.”

And thank God she did. When she threw herself into Jisung’s arms, in the middle of the battle of our lives, the smile on her face bright like she wasn’t covered in grime and blood and wasn’t bleeding from the cut on her arm – it was like the sun rose. Then, Minho, coming down those stairs with his bad eye covered by the eyepatch that has become a usual part of his getup now, his eye having never recovered, and slotting himself back into this place behind the captain – It was like they had never been gone in all senses except the tiredness in my bones, the pain of knowing what the captain and I went through, talked about during all those hours in Jisung’s cot.

I can look back on it now because we made it. It’s all good now. The three of them, they’re happy together. Jisung is a ball of sunshine. He still helps me in the kitchen, every single day, and often eats with us, but most of his days, and his nights, are spent in the captain’s quarters now. He usually occupies the spot behind the captain on the left side, the only person Minho trusts to take over his blind spot. Jisung is sweet. He’s usually touching one of them, and it would be wildly imrpoper on a pirate ship if it wasn’t us, and if it wasn���t him. His hand slithering into Minho’s back pocket, linking his pinky with the captain’s when he thinks nobody is looking. And while Jisung keeps his flirting to a minimum with the captain, no doubt her orders, because she is our captain after all, I’ve walked in on Minho and Jisung kissing more times than I can count – even in the baths once, doing … much more than kissing, an incident I have tried to scrub from my memory, to no avail.

Unlike Changbin, who was almost giddy with excitement, when he told a select group (Hyunjin, Chan, Jeongin and me) in great detail how, when he had to urgently wake the captain the other day, had made his bumbling, apologetic way into the captain’s bedroom, and had watched first, a fluffy, disoriented, shirtless Jisung, then a sleepy but murderous looking naked Minho, pop up, both of who protectively pushed down the captain between them when she tried to sit up, asking what was going on. I asked him once if he didn’t think he was a little too invested in their relationship, but he always just waves me off.

“I’ve watched Minho pine over the captain for years. I watched him get sad when she pushed him away, I let him take his anger out on me when he got frustrated – I deserve to be happy and a little nosey now.”

And it seems that the captain, loving, covertly, privately, yet openly, has made some others feel like they finally have permission to do the same.

Hyunjin and Chan became official in the late summer. It was an understated affair. One night, when everyone was gathered in the common area, just hanging out, drinking, reading, playing cards, a balmy, salty breeze blowing in through the portholes, Hyunjin skipped in, walked over to where Chan was lounging on a beanbag and planted himself right in his lap, just like he usually did.

Except this time he turned around, stared at a wide-eyed Chan with a petulant determination in his eyes, before he leaned in and kissed him square on the mouth. It was quite sweet, watching Chan melt into it, every one of his familiar touches speaking volumes about how much, and for how long, they’ve been doing this.

When Hyunjin pulled back he was blushing furiously, but he stared at everyone with a scowl, like he was challenging someone to say something negative. When nobody did, when everyone just slowly returned to whatever they were doing, Hyunjin deflated so visibly that Chan laughed, pressed a kiss to his temple and murmured a quiet “told you it would be fine” before kissing him again.

And Seungmin and Jeongin … whatever is going on between them is almost imperceptible, and I think most of the crew haven’t noticed. Even Hyunjin refuses to say anything at all about them, though I know he knows more than he lets on. But I don’t push. If they need to figure this out by themselves, they should. But something has clearly changed between them, finally. They no longer stare at each other when they think the other isn’t looking. They often look at each other now, over the table, something special in their eyes. Where there used to be sadness, uncertainty, longing, there’s warmth, love, want now. It’s tentative, like a blooming in sprint, but it’s there.

Them. Chan and Hyunjin’s easy companionship. The captain and Minho and Jisung’s devotion. I wish it didn’t, but it has made me wish for what I never thought I could have. Love. Intimacy. Partnership. But … maybe … no, I don’t know.

It’s all very new, you know. Something that has only just … he …

God, this is harder when it’s about me.

A couple weeks ago, while I was cleaning up the last plates after dinner. Changbin had wandered in, his fists buried deep in his pockets, looking so pale and nervous that I thought at first that he was ill.

But when I asked him if he was, he only blushed deeply, flush climbing from his neck up to his hairline until he was entirely pink.

“No, uhm …” he stammered out, “I was just wondering … when we go to Andros … I heard there’s a really big market. With wares from all over the world. Apparently the new governor has been making some trades and … well, I thought maybe you would want to check it out? Find some new stuff to cook with? Or just look around, really …”

He’d said all of this almost in one breath, barely looking at me, only throwing me little glances here or there, and I didn’t understand why he was so nervous.

“Sure, Bin,” I had laughed, but I regretted it immediately when his face fell, “Hyunjin and I were going to go together, he wanted to find some perfumes or soaps or fabrics, but you’re welcome to come, too!”

Whatever I said was clearly the wrong thing because his face fell even more, his eyebrows drawing together, making him look almost angry.

“Ah, it’s alright. You go with Hyunjin,” he had just muttered. He gave me a pained little smile and rushed out of the kitchen before I could say anything else.

When I told Jisung about it the next day while we were making lunch, he almost dropped his knife. He rushed over to me, took both my hands into his and stared at me so intently it almost scared me.

“Lix …” he breathed, his eyes sparkling brightly, “Changbin was asking you out! He was asking you out on a date!”

First, I blushed. Then I started panicking, really hard. So hard that I’m pretty sure I stopped breathing for a second, because Jisung suddenly looked very worried and led me over to sit on a crate of potatoes.

“Lix, are you okay? Breathe for me, please,” he mumbled, and I somehow managed to gulp down a single breath of air that felt like it lodged itself into my chest sideways.

“He can’t want to date me,” I choked out. Jisung looked confused.

“But, why, Lix? You’re wonderful? Anyone should be lucky to date you.”

I shook my head vehemently.

“He might think he wants to, but he doesn’t. Not when I’m … the way I am.”

“What do you mean? Don’t you like him?”

And to be honest, I had never even asked myself if I did. Because it had never been an option. And Changbin had just always … been there. A calm, soothing presence. Probably the person I loved cooking for the most because of how wholeheartedly he seemed to enjoy it, and how he would compliment me every single day. The heart and soul of the crew, always there for words of advice but never scared to tell the truth, to put someone into place when they were out of line. Yes, of course, he was gorgeous in a way I knew not everyone appreciated. His body was big and solid and strong and when he hugged me, I never wanted to let go.

“I … I don’t know, I … maybe? Maybe I could? But Jisung … it doesn’t matter. Because he will want to have sex with whoever he’s dating and I … I don’t think I ever want to do that again.”

That was only half the truth because I knew I didn’t. But that felt too scary to just … say.

Finally, Jisung seemed to understand. He blinked at me for a good few seconds, before he got up, started pacing up and down in front of me, deep in thought. Then he stopped.

“How do you know that? Did he say something?”

He sounded indignant, almost. I just stared at him, shook my head.

“I mean, no … I don’t know … I’ve never ever seen him flirt with anyone, so I wouldn’t know, but … doesn’t everyone want that? Have sex?”

Jisung shrugged.

“I mean, I do, yeah, but I was thinking and … if the captain had told me she wouldn’t want to sleep with me – I think I would’ve been okay with that. I would still want her, of course, but that would be … a separate thing, you know? Because I would still love her.”

I scoffed.

“Not everyone has a special relationship like that, Jisung. Changbin probably just has a stupid crush on me. It’ll pass.”

Jisung came back to me, sat next to me on the crate, wrapped an arm around me.

“You don’t know that. Just … why don’t you give it a chance? See where it goes? Wouldn’t you want to know? If there’s a chance? … Don’t you want to be loved?”

The way he asked it, with his own love shimmering in his voice, painting beautiful images of tenderness, reminding me of Seungmin’s gaze on Jeongin when he laughed, on Chan’s hand on Hyunjin’s waist when he opened doors for him – I almost hated Jisung because he was right, and I couldn’t ignore the fact that I did, desperately, want to be loved.

But I was also terrified to get hurt. Terrified of opening myself up to everything Changbin and I could be, only to be disappointed. To fall and to not be caught, or worse, to fall and then betray myself for the rest of my life, only so I could keep being loved.

So as much as I would like to describe the first weeks of Changbin’s, for lack of a better word, courtship, as a time of sweetness and soft touches, it was anything but. It was me, fighting tooth and nail, every day, to let myself hope while also protecting myself.

But he was … perfect. A few days after he asked me out, he started sticking around long after everyone was done with dinner. He didn’t say anything, just stayed, helped me carry the plates into the kitchen. Asked me if I would like him to go get the water, so I wouldn’t have to lug the full bucket back and forth. Talked to me as if he never asked me out, about anything and everything.

And before I knew it, it became a sort of ritual. Jisung, who used to help me clean up, subtly, seemingly casually, started leaving dinner with everyone else when he realised Changbin started sticking around – obnoxiously winking at me, shooting me thumbs up, before no doubt slipped away to tell the captain and Minho all about it. But I couldn’t be mad, so preoccupied was I with not falling head over heels for Changbin’s gentle hands when he washed the dishes, the way his hair fell into his eyes where he was leaned over the tub, how softly he talked about his life and the way his cheeks dimpled when he smiled.

He asked me out again two weeks after the first time he tried. At least this time, I was prepared. But I also knew that I needed to say something now, to protect myself – and to be fair to him. So when he asked me if I wanted to go on a walk with him the next time we were on Abaco, because he’d had heard there was a beach, usually deserted, with sand as fine as stardust and lots of shells to collect, I forced myself to interrupt him.

“Changbin, is this … am I reading this wrong, or are you trying to ask me out?”

Changbin looked almost relieved. He ran a nervous hand through his hair, chuckled sheepishly.

“Uh, yeah … I hope it wasn’t too awkward,” he mumbled, and it was so sweet I had to swallow down the army of butterflies wreaking havoc on my insides. This was going to hurt.

“Binnie, I don’t think …” I started, petered out because I lost my courage, but Changbin froze instantly. His face fell, and he looked devastated, but mostly embarrassed.

“Oh,” he breathed out, before he unfroze, gaze glued to the floor, “Oh, I see. Don’t worry. It was just … I just … never mind. Ignore what I said.”

And God, if I had been stronger, I would’ve left it at that. Let him think that was what it was and licked my wounds, healed my broken heart now, while it was only sporting cracks. But something in me, maybe it was my desperation to be loved, maybe it was Jisung’s influence, maybe it was just … something that told me that Changbin was different – something in me forced me to step forward, into Changbin’s space, making him look up at me with wide eyes.

“No, Binnie, it’s not that … I would love to go on a date with you,” I managed to mumble, and the way Changbin’s face brightened, the way his ridiculously beautiful smile returned, it made my heart ache.

“But … can we sit?”

Changbin nodded, and I led him out to the mess hall. We sat down at one of the tables and I put everything on the line. I told him about how I grew up. How I had never cared for sex. How I tried it and didn’t see the appeal. How I sold my body and never felt a thing. And finally, my voice so shaky it was barely recognisable, that I never wanted to have sex again.

“It’s … it’s not you. Not at all. I just … I don’t like it, having sex, it never felt like something I did for me. And I don’t think I ever want to do it again. Not with anyone.”

I was avoiding looking at him at this point, because I felt so fragile that one mean look from him would have shattered like a vial of glass. I had never opened myself up to anyone so entirely, not even the captain, not even Jisung. It was terrifying, placing my glass heart into his hands. But it was Changbin, right? Changbin would never. I hoped.

“So, much as you think you might want to date me … I don’t know if you do. Because I’m not like other people you could be dating. I won’t be able to give you that.”

Changbin was quiet for a long moment. So long I couldn’t take the suspense any more and finally looked at him.

He looked thoughtful, but not disgusted, and that was enough for the moment. Enough to make tendrils of hope bloom in my chest.

“So … just so I know I understood this correctly. You … you would like to date me, you might even like me, but you just don’t like sex. Don’t want to have it. With anyone, ever again?”

I nodded. I swallowed the need to grovel, to beg, to tell him I would do anything to be with him but that. I swallowed, suffocated the worst thought – that I would maybe even do if that was really needed for him to want me.

And Changbin nodded as well, looked at me so gently that tears started pooling in my eyes.

But then he said, “okay. Can you give me a day to think about it?” and just like that, he shattered my heart into a million pieces.

But I smiled. I nodded. Ignored the tears pooling in my eyes. I held my breath, watched dumbly as he smiled gently, touched my hand, ran his thumb over my knuckles, got up and left. Then I started crying. I cried myself to sleep that night and barely managed to get up in time to make breakfast. I walked into the kitchen to Jisung already there. He dropped everything when he saw my swollen eyes, and pulled me into a hug that just made me cry harder.

He asked me what happened, and I told him, stammered it out through the sobs, and he hugged me tighter, led me to the same crate of potatoes he sat me down a few weeks prior, and told me to just sit there while he made breakfast. He did it all himself, quietly, only asking small, hesitant questions every now and again, and somehow even made me coffee, scrambled me some eggs, let me remain in the kitchen while he took care of the breakfast rush. He did what he could to keep an eye on me, to distract me, but it was pointless. The pain of it, the humiliation, the terror of what Changbin could do with the information I had given him – the knowledge that I would have to face him again. I wondered which side the captain would choose if I told her I needed to go. If she could make Changbin keep his mouth shut. If she would ask him to leave. I couldn’t live with that, the crew needed Changbin …

When the doors swung open, I opened my mouth to ask Jisung if he thought I should go see the captain right away, but instead of his, I instead met Changbin’s eyes.

When he spotted me, his eyes widened and softened, and they were filled with so much pity it made me nauseous. He approached me slowly.

“Yongbokkie …” he breathed out, carefully went to crouch down in front of where I was still sitting on that stupid potato crate, probably looking like a fool, crying over him. “Why are you crying? What happened?”

It was too much. The pity. Now this. My throat felt like it was lined with glass shards, and it was audible in my voice.

“What do you mean what happened? Was the rejection not enough? Did you come to gloat?”

The realisation visibly washed over him and he paled.

“Hey, hey …” he reached out a careful hand, soothed it over my arm. I didn’t have the strength to pull away. I started crying again. “I didn’t … I never meant to.”

He took a deep breath and got up, made me scoot over until he could squeeze onto the crate next to me. The change of position was welcome. At least now I wasn’t forced to look at him any more.

“I wanted to take a day to think about it because … Yongbok, that was a big, important thing you shared with me there. It was really personal, and I could see how difficult it was.”

He took a deep breath. I watched, out of the corner of my eye, how he nervously cracked his knuckles in his lap. His hands still looked so soft and gentle and gorgeous, and I still wanted to hold them so badly, and it hurt so, so much.

“And to be honest, I had never heard of something like it before. I just kinda assumed everyone wanted to … you know. But, I thought about it all night, and I also … I talked to the captain – without mentioning your name, of course! Just, I needed advice and …”

He turned to me, waited for a second for me to do the same, but I couldn’t. He didn’t push me.

“Well, I think it’s fine. It makes sense, even. Hell, sex is not that important to me either. And if you really feel like that, then who am I to tell you anything different. Especially with the job you used to do, I mean … that must’ve been tough.”

It felt like an out of body experience, listening to him. He sounded so sincere, so serious.

“So I, uhh …” Changbin started, but hesitated, “Yongbokkie, I would really love it if you could look at me when I say this.”

Blindly, like I was pulled by an invisible string, I straightened up, turned to him, met his eyes, his sweet, soft eyes, looking back at me with an expression I’d never seen in them before.

“Yongbok, I’d still love to … you know … go on a date with you. Take you to that beach. Fully clothed, of course! I mean, if you want. Just … for the shells. And to hang out with you. Because I would like to do that. Spend more time with you. Like that. If you want it.”

I don’t remember what was going on in my poor, muddled head at that moment. White noise. Too many thoughts and so much hope and so many stupid butterflies because he was there, right in front of me, looking so gorgeous it made me dizzy and …

“You would … even if we can’t ever have sex?”

Changbin blushed, shrugged softly.

“Like, I said, it’s not really the most important thing to me, anyway.”

“No, but, Bin …” I insisted, “I need you to be sure, because … it won’t change. If you change your mind, then … Bin, it will hurt.”

Changbin shook his head, reached out, gently cupped my face in his hands and let his thumb run over my cheek.

“I’m sure. I would never want you to do something you’re not comfortable with. And I would never force you to do anything.”

He dropped his hands again, and their absence felt like a physical ache.

“So, let me ask you again. Do you want to take a walk with me, when we get to Abaco? I heard there’s a really nice beach, super secluded, with sand as fine as stardust, and with the prettiest shells you’ve ever seen.”

And I nodded.

And we went. And we walked, side by side, talking about everything under the sun, until we reached the secluded beach. And it was the most beautiful place I’d ever seen. The water was clear and turquoise, the sand so fine it sparkled in the sun like a thousand diamonds. And the shells! There were so many, one more perfect, more stunning than the other. We spent hours collecting them, and then we went back, dumped them all into a pile on the floor in the corner of the common room, arranged them into the perfect combinations, and then I taught Changbin how to tie macramé knots, and we made hanging ornaments. One for each of us, and one for Hyunjin, who joined us at some point, cooed over the pretty shells so much that Changbin agreed to make him one, too.

We were the last ones to leave the common room that night and Changbin insisted on walking me back to my cabin, blushing and ignoring my giggles when I told him he kind of had to because his cabin was literally right next door.

But he dropped me off, smiled at me so softly it made my entire chest erupt into butterflies, told me he had the best day he’d had in a long time and just … left. And I loved him even more for it because it gave me hope that he really meant it, but a part of me couldn’t help but wish he had kissed me, wished he had stayed. Not to … fool around, but just to spend more time with him. Maybe pull him up into my cot. Pull his body close, sink into his strong arms.

He didn’t kiss me on our next date either. Nor on the next one. Until we were sat on the same beach again weeks later, this time just chatting, snacking on the picnic basket I had made for us. I looked over at him, and suddenly, I knew I didn’t want to spend another minute without knowing what his lips tasted like.

So I climbed into his lap, dropped the cube of cheese in his hands back into the bowl he had just plucked it from, wrapped my hands around his neck and pressed my lips to his. The sound he made, something between a squeak and a breathy little moan, will be stuck in my head forever.

When he didn’t kiss me back, I pulled away, and he looked completely out of his depth.

“Is this fine?” he asked, breathless and entirely uncertain, and I realised that he meant if this was something I wanted to do. That he didn’t want me to feel pressured, that he wasn’t sure if I was doing this for myself or for him. I didn’t know if I should cry or laugh, but instead I just leaned in, kissed him again, only pulled back enough to whisper a few words to him.

“Don’t worry, I want this. I’m not made of glass.”

And that’s all it took for him to kiss me back, and it was a little cheesy and sometimes our teeth clashed because we were smiling so much, but despite that, or maybe because of that, it was so mind-numbingly good. Tender. Addicting.

And we figured the rest out. When he got hard underneath me for the first time, he blushed, apologised, even though I told him not to, and manoeuvred me until our crotches weren’t touching any more. And when, a few days later, we were making out in my bed and I got hard, he didn’t panic, just pulled away and asked me to tell him if everything was alright. And I did. I told him that it was my body reacting to him, but that I still didn’t change my mind. I said the last part a lot less gracefully than I like to admit, with a lot more stammering and self-consciousness, but he understood. And then he told me that he needed me to know that, of course, he, or his body, wanted me like that, that he was attracted to me, but that had nothing to do with me. Or rather, that it didn’t mean that he wanted to do anything differently. That this was enough. He would deal with it later. And then I kissed him again, and he sighed into my lips and slipped his hand under my shirt, not touching me, just resting his warm palm and my back, and then I did cry a little bit because I couldn’t believe I got so lucky. He held me through that, too. And we fell asleep like that. And the next day, he got up with me and made breakfast with me and Jisung, who grinned at us like an idiot when we walked in together. And that was that.

So, yeah. That happened.

And I don’t know what the future holds. I really don’t. But these days, I’m no longer scared of it.

The captain is still as dedicated to this life, her ship, her crew, as ever. We still hunt the bad guys, stand up for those who need it. But the work feels less hopeless now, more like we’re making an actual difference. And because of what we went through, because our purpose remains the same, our crew has only become stronger, more tight-knit, more like a family since the day Han Yujun finally died.

So this, the crew, the ship, it feels like forever. I’d like for it to be. It would be my first.

I asked the captain once, if she thought she would one day put all of this behind her, settle down somewhere, maybe start a family, and she had scowled at me.

“And do what? Plant vegetables? Become a sedentary housewife, sit on the porch all day? No, thanks. I’d rather be out here, be free, be of use.”

I had nodded. It was understandable, after all. And really, I couldn’t picture her like that, either, at least not anytime soon.

“But what about a family? You could have that here, too?”

She had blinked at me for a solid second before she made a face, slapped my arm, shook her head like I had just suggested something outlandish.

But I can imagine it. A little captain running around the ship, growing up in conditions that normal people would frown at, but with more love than the little thing could ever wish for. Because we would all love on them. Maybe a little girl with Minho’s fierce eyes. A little Jisung with chubby cheeks and big, brown doe eyes that nobody can say no to. And even just seeing how Minho cares for Soonie, Doongie and Dori, how his voice softens when he talks to them, how he plays with them sometimes when he thinks nobody’s watching. They would make good parents. I dare say we all would.

But whatever happens, I will be around until the end. I couldn’t imagine a better place to be. I have a roof over my head, a warm cabin where the sunlight streams in in the morning. Soft, baby blue sheets with hand embroidered daisies that one of my best friends made for me. A kitchen I can call my own and a crew to feed. Jisung to prep the food for me and Changbin to do the dishes with me, when we don’t get distracted kissing each other until our lips are numb.

A crew I call my family. A captain I would follow until the ends of the earth. The captain’s second-in-command, who protects us all like it’s his second nature. A best friend who loves me with more enthusiasm than I ever thought I deserved. A boyfriend who likes me, might love me, exactly for who I am.

A really beautiful life.

< interlude - THE END

series masterlist // skzms masterlist // kofi

🔖 taglist: follow and turn on notifications for my library account: @skzms-library 🔞 I monitor ages over there, just like I used to do with my taglist. I will block minors and ageless blogs, and you'll have to message me again to get unblocked. so just have your age in your bio before you follow!

[hyunjinspark]

star lost with you | hyunjin au | part 14

synopsis: working in a quaint little art store, you’ve had the honor of meeting all kinds of people, but you’ve never met somebody like him.

there were many reasons hyunjin returned to his hometown; a getaway from the ephemeral and fast-paced life of the city, so he could fall in love with life again. he thought he was prepared for everything, to study art in the way that he’s always wanted to, but what he didn’t anticipate was meeting you. hwang hyunjin realises that sometimes, the best things in life happen unplanned. 

pairing: idol! hyunjin x artist! reader

genre: friends to lovers, so much angst, smut, fluff, set in the idolverse, mutual pining, unrequited love, forbidden romance, slowburn (!!!) soulmate au (kind of), star-crossed lovers

word count: 35K (🫠)

warnings: cursing, drinking, jealousy, mutual pining, sexual tension, intense making out, dirty talk, mature content, sub! hyunjin, references to fingering, mentions of the word cock, dom! hyunjin, handjob, grinding, dry humping, overthinking, references to anxiety and therapy, slight confrontation, opens with a flashback

a/n: thank you for being so patient with me, and this story! i worked a lot for this chapter, and its very pivotal to the rest of the story, in terms of hyun and yn. in fact almost 80% of this chapter is just them. i hope you love it. its very longg so please grab a blanket and snacks before sitting down to read it ;)

i recommend that you can listen to my star lost playlist here!

important: all works are fiction, and do not in any way represent the real personalities or real people, they exist only as faceclaims, and are fictional characters.

masterlist

summer of 2015.

“Do you know why those stars are called Cassiopeia?” 

The constellation was more visible than ever tonight — made up of five stars, it almost looked like a Queen sitting on her throne, in the sky.

It was a real question, because you had absolutely no idea why the constellations were named after Greek myths. You’d read about it, of course, within faded literature pages in middle school, but you’d never been interested in astronomy, so you hardly paid attention.

Staring up at it now, you wished you had.

“Hmm?” He asked, and you realised that he also hadn’t been paying attention, to you.

“Cassiopeia” You repeated, pointing your hand upwards, at the bright stars.

“I don’t speak French, babe”

“It’s Latin…” You told him, “What are you thinking of?”

The sand between your fingers was icky, but once you got used to it, it wasn’t all that bad. The waves rushing over you felt calm. The sea was warm this time of year, and the only thing you had looked forward to all summer was this moment, right here.

“I’m thinking…about how I’d do anything for a peanut butter and jelly sandwich right now” He replied, as if he’d been crafting his answer with perfection for ages, as if you hadn’t just asked him about the night sky, something completely unrelated. 

You turned your head, cheek pressing into the sand, “Really, Lix? We…just ate”

Felix sighed, still staring at the skies above, but making no effort to actually see anything, “I know, but…I’m still hungry”

It was tradition at this point, for you and Yongbok to run away to the beach, lie down in the sand, and talk about anything and everything in the world, or talk about nothing at all.

He was the one person in your life you didn’t mind silence with.

You rolled over to face him, as another wave washed over the two of you.

He squint at you, “What? Don’t look at me like that”

“Like what?” You laughed, elbows digging into the sand, “The carbonara Hana made was good, Lix. It was her first time making that too, don’t be so harsh on her”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was good, but I just don’t understand why we didn’t let Minho make dinner, as he does every time. You should stop being a kiss-ass to Hana”

“I am not a kiss-ass” You rolled your eyes.

He sighed, and sat up, making you sit up too, knees digging into the wet sand. You fixed the red strings of your bikini, tightening the knot at the sides.

He stopped you in the midst of that action, hand landing on your bare thigh, “Please? Just one sandwich?”

“Why can’t you make it yourself?” You frowned, looking up at him.

“Because…I don’t wanna get up” He hummed, lending his help to you. His fingers drifted upwards to your swimsuit and he tongued his cheek, “You don’t even know how to tie a knot properly. Let me”

You sat back, hands resting on your thighs as he took over. His fingers were cold, making you shiver, and Felix smiled at that.

“Did you even hear what I said?” You asked, annoyed.

He squinted, “About the French chick?”

You glanced back up at the sky, and the constellation that you had been talking of, “Greek. I was asking you if you know why the stars were named after her”

“Maybe she was really hot”

You rolled your eyes, “I’m sure she was”

He looked up at you, after tying the strings in a perfect knot, “Then they should name a star after you too, Y/N”

“Stop” You laughed, pushing his hand away, “You’re just saying that because you want me to get you food”

He smiled, shameless, “Yeah I am. Please?”

You glanced towards the cabin, a few hundred or so meters away. 

There were no lights on, since everybody else in the house had gone to sleep. Along the rest of the coast, other cabins dotted the beach, of all sizes and styles, lit up and occupied by families or groups of friends. It was a hot summer and nobody liked to stay in their stuffy city homes. 

But the coast was beautiful, and serene.

“Fine” You hummed, reaching over to pinch his cheek, “But you owe me, Lix”

His eyes were bright and you could never say no to him, so you gave in.

“I love you” He sang, as you walked over to the cabin, footsteps light in the sand. 

You took your time, relishing in the cool wind against your skin, occasionally turning back to smile at Yongbok. His eyes never left your figure until you reached the porch, making sure you got there safely, even though it was the safest place in the world.

Soon, this summer would end and you’d be back at school, missing this gritty sand and warm seawater. 

Yongbok’s shirt hung on the porch railing, next to your sweater and you slipped it on over your bikini, before stepping inside. The cabin tend to get cold, even on summer nights like this, so you hugged yourself to keep warm, as you walked through the foyer. 

Your friends were sleeping, and you had to be quiet. Treading carefully, the loud creak of the door still gave your presence away, wooden planks becoming wet with your footsteps.

You blindly fumbled in the dark, finding your way to the kitchen.

The television was on.

It was a little past three, and static noise buzzed through the little house, flashing colours lighting up the living room.

“Hello?” You asked, trying to see in the dark, “Minho?”

A blanket lay on the couch, but whoever had been watching TV had already left, since the remote lay buried in the pile of cushions. Frowning, you picked it up, turning it off.

“Just because Yongbok’s uncle pays for this doesn’t mean we can leave shit on…” You sighed, in the empty room, hoping Minho would hear you. The cabin was small, so even if he was upstairs, he’d be able to hear you. 

Now that the television was off, the entire room was engulfed in darkness again, and perhaps it would have been smarter to just leave it on so you could navigate. 

You weren’t scared of the dark, but you were easily startled. Moonlight filtered in through the windows, and peeking out, you could see Yongbok’s shape against the dark horizon.

In the blue light of your phone screen, you spotted your headphones on the coffee table. You plugged them in, switching to a playlist Yeonjun made as you slipped the headset over your wet hair.

It was silly, that you’d be making sandwiches for him at this time of the day, but you’d do just about anything in the world for Yongbok.

Humming along to your music, you stepped into the pantry, searching for the bread. For some reason, Minho had brought back four different kinds of bread from the local bakery earlier today, and you peered at the labels, wanting to pick one which wasn’t multigrain, since Yongbok hated that.

Whispers interrupted your search, and you stilled in your movements.

“Yongbok?” You turned around, but you couldn’t see anything or anyone in the dark.

It was probably your music that made you hear things, and you turned back to the shelf. 

“There you are” You smiled, spotting the Whole Wheat Bread.

You stepped into the kitchen, packet clasped tightly within your hands and that’s when you saw them.

You stilled in your movements.

The bread unceremoniously dropped from your hands, landing on the musty floor with a thump.

What the fuck?

Across the kitchen island, sat on the two bar stools, your best friend, Song Hana was kissing your other friend, Yeonjun.

No. They weren’t even just kissing. Hana was halfway in Yeonjun’s lap, and his tongue was so far down her throat that this obviously wasn’t the first time it happened. 

Your reaction of surprise wasn’t loud, but it might as well have been like dynamite inside the quiet house because it made them jump apart from each other, turning to face you.

His eyes were wide, as she noticed you in the doorway, “Oh my god. Y/N. Hey”

Hey?

So simple. Hey, I wasn’t just making out with our best friend.

You wish you could have just walked away without drawing attention to yourself, but now they were both staring at you.

You cleared your throat, thankful the dark concealed your shock, wondering what you could possibly say to diffuse the awkwardness, “Uh, I didn’t know anyone was awake in the house” 

“Yeah” Hana laughed, fumbling over her words, “I couldn’t sleep so…I came to get some dumplings”

Your gaze drifted to Yeonjun, and a faint pink coated his cheeks, but he wasn’t even looking at you. 

“Right... Jun?” You asked, making him finally glance up. Even in the darkness of the kitchen, you could prominently see the shape of his Adam’s Apple, as he swallowed, “Yeah, Y/N? Were you at the beach?”

You obviously saw them kiss, but they were hiding it, and there was nothing more to say.

“I…um, I just came to get some jelly, for Felix” You told them, “But…I’ll leave you two to it. Enjoy the...dumplings”

You immediately turned around, because you had to process this - whatever the hell you just saw, because your best friends were hooking up, and this was how you found out?

Hana had never expressed a romantic interest in him before this, what changed? Your friendship was too special, far too precious, to ruin with an impulsive mistake or decision like that.

You would ask her about it later, not tonight. 

You had to get back to the beach, to Felix. 

To something familiar, and comforting, and known and—

—A hand immediately grabbed your arm, stopping you in the corridor, in the midst of your thoughts.

You shouldn’t be surprised that it was him coming after you, instead of her.

Yeonjun was always the one wanting to fix everything, “Y/N, please wait”

He was always the one who never wanted to hurt you.

“Yeah?” You turned around, hoping you sounded as nonchalant as you wanted to, “You can keep the bread. I…I’ll just tell Yongbok we don’t have any”

“You’re hurt” 

Your eyebrows shot up, at his statement, “Hurt by what? The sandwiches weren’t even for me, I’m fine”

“You know that’s not what I’m talking about”

A laugh escaped you, “Then what?”

Yeonjun closed his eyes, “I wasn’t hiding it from you…I was going to tell you”

“It’s okay, I can pretend I didn’t see anything” You shot him a smile, trying to leave but he pulled you back. You stumbled towards him in the dark corridor, wondering where Hana was, if she was listening to this, and what she must be thinking.

“Jun…” You laughed, another forced chuckle.

A flash of regret painted his eyes, “I promise, I was going to tell you”

It was cold, and you were confused, but Yeonjun’s grip was warm, and understanding.

He didn’t need to explain himself.

You were…just surprised, a whirlwind of thoughts running through your head of everything that could possibly go wrong after tonight, and wondering if you really knew your friends as well as you thought you did. They’d been hooking up all this time, and you never noticed, and you never picked up on any hints?

You were more disappointed in yourself than anything.

He continued speaking, “I was going to tell you in the morning, I didn’t know you’re still awake, Y/N”

“I just didn’t expect that. Does anybody else know about you?”

He shook his head, “There isn’t an us”

You swallowed, “I mean, it’s fine if there is. It’s just…kind of something I have to get used to. How long have you been-”

Yeonjun grimaced, “No, you don’t understand. That was the first time it ever happened, Y/N”

Your voice fell, “What?”

“You just …walked in on our first kiss” He explained, “We haven’t ever done that before. That’s what I was trying to tell you. It just happened”

“But…” You squeezed your eyes shut, “What? I don’t understand. Are you…two tipsy or something?”

Yeonjun laughed, “I wish, but no. We’re...completely sober. Sorry you had to see that”

Your voice softened, tension falling from your shoulders, “You don’t have to apologise. I just didn’t expect...”

He nodded, a chuckle escaping him, “Yeah. You know that I’ve liked her for years”

You crossed your arms, hugging yourself, “Yeah…I just, I had no idea she liked you back”

He laughed, “I didn’t either, but she said that she always wanted to kiss me too”

“That’s good” You told him.

He lowered his voice, “Y/N. There’s something else. She said she’s in love with me”

Your eyes shot open, “What? In…love with you?”

He nodded, a smile on his lips, “I know. It was hard for me to believe too. The girl of my...fucking dreams just said that to me, like it took no effort. I didn’t think that stuff happened in real life”

This changed everything.

Yeonjun was only sixteen, and he’d found the love of his life, and you were so happy for him.

Your eyes lit up, “Did she kiss you first?”

He nodded, his lips still had traces of Hana’s lipgloss on it, “Yeah. She did”

“Fuck, that’s...really cool” You stared at the floor, trying to process it, “I was just taken aback, I’m sorry I didn’t mean to freak out or anything”

He shook his head, “No, I completely understand” 

Just then, Hana stepped out from the kitchen, footsteps timid, hands hugging herself as she saw you, “Hey”

“Hey”

The only light in the corridor was from the moon, and it illuminated their silhouettes beautifully.

They hadn’t even got together yet but you could imagine them being perfect together.

“I’m sorry you had to find out like that” She bit her lip, “We were going to talk to you tomorrow. I’d never keep something like that from you”

Yeonjun glanced at her, eyes crinkling, “I told her”

She looked up at him, mouth parted, “You did?”

The way they were looking at each other made it obvious. This wasn’t just a temporary, impulsive crush. Was it so easy to find the love of your life?

“I’m…gonna go up to bed though” She squeaked, and Yeonjun nodded.

She turned to you, “Is it okay if we switch places? I wanted to stay with him tonight. You could…stay with Minho, or Felix?”

“You’re kicking me out of our room?” You joked.

Hana immediately seemed guilty, “Sorry. I can move your things for you”

“It’s okay” You nodded, even though you had far too many things and art supplies for Hana to even attempt to move, and you could never fall asleep in Felix’s bed, but they were in love and that was the craziest thing in the world, so those technicalities didn’t matter right now, and you’d make do.

“It’s okay, you don’t have to move my stuff just for tonight. I can share Lix’s comforter” You smiled at her.

Hana walked away, and you were left alone with Yeonjun.

His gaze trailed to the kitchen, “Did you want something…from in there?”

You remembered the reason you’d been here in the first place, “Felix…he wanted-”

“Peanut butter and jelly?” He finished your sentence, “It’s almost four in the morning”

“Yeah, you know how he is” You laughed.

He sighed, shoulders sinking, as realisation sank in, “Sorry”

For what?

He had nothing to be sorry for.

Guilt overcome you, because you’d walked in on his first kiss, essentially ruining it and now he was saying sorry to you.

You frowned, reaching to grab his hand, “For what? I’m really happy for you, Yeonjun. I’m sorry I ruined your first kiss”

“Y/N-”

“I should be the one apologising. I know I was surprised at first, but you know that you deserve the best? I…know how long you’ve liked her, and I’m really glad she feels the same way. Why are you apologising for that?”

Yeonjun was looking at you in amusement, and he reached ahead to tuck a wet strand of your hair back, “You’re really special, you know that right?”

“What?” You frowned, “Why?”

“I was apologising to you just because…me and Hana finished all the jelly”

»»————-

“The jelly is gone”

Felix turned to you, quirking an eyebrow, “What does that even mean?”

You settled back into the sand, still in your sweater, curling your legs up, “It means…the jam is over. They finished it” 

“Who?” His voice raised, in pointed annoyance, and surprise.

“Yeonjun, and Hana”

Felix sighed, leaning back on his palms, “Why were they eating jelly at three am?”

“I walked in on them kissing” You blurted.

“What?”

“I just…I saw them, inside, kissing”

“Wait, what?” He shifted on his knees, towards you, “Who? Hana and him?”

You glanced at him, “Yeah, who else?”

A variety of emotions passed Felix’s face, and perhaps you weren’t the only one having trouble processing this. They would be perfect for each other, but what if they were not?

You buried your hands in your sleeves, watching the moonlight bounce off the high tide.

There was silence between you, the only sound of the ocean waves breaking at the surface. 

You had been excited for them, but now that you truly thought about it...a worry festered within you.

“I didn’t know Hana liked him back” He spoke.

“They’re probably gonna date, right?”

“I don’t know” He shrugged, “They might”

You traced a heart in the sand, “I’m happy for them”

He tilt his head, “Yeah, sure, you sound real happy, Y/N”

You squeezed your eyes shut, feeling crazy for even thinking all of this but you could tell Yongbok anything so you did, “I am. I’m just worried”

“About?”

You felt like a child, but you had a tendency to imagine the worst case scenarios, “What if they stop hanging out with us?”

Felix’s eyes softened, “Babe…”

Your voice shot up, “Don’t look at me like that. I’ve seen it happen. What if they break up? Everything’s going to go to shit then. It’s a bad idea to date within your friend group, isn’t it? This could be the downfall of everything”

Felix sighed, shifting closer to you, “Nothing is going to happen”

“You don’t know that” Your voice now broke, and you felt stupid for worrying when you should be happy for them, “I don’t want to lose them…or you. You guys…are the best thing in my life”

“Babe, they haven’t even started dating yet” He chuckled, hand reaching to your chin, “Calm down”

You erased the heart you’d drawn, “Yeah. You probably think I sound dumb as fuck”

“I’d never think that about you” He smiled, “Your concerns are very valid…but I don’t want you to be upset about something that may never even happen”

You sighed, and maybe spending so much time around Felix had made you as dramatic as him, “But what if we have to choose? I don’t want any of them to get hurt”

“Why would we ever have to choose?”

“I don’t know. Like…pick a side between them, if they fight. You know that I can’t choose, I love Yeonjun as much as I love Hana-”

Felix laughed, “God. I love you” 

“Don’t laugh at me” You frowned.

“I’m not laughing at you, babe” He smiled, “I just think you’re…making yourself upset for no reason. You love doing that”

You looked up at him, “Lix…”

His voice softened, against the harsh ocean waves, “Nothing is going to happen. Even if it does, you’re not gonna lose us. I’m always going to be here, you know that, right?”

You grabbed his hand, pulling him closer, “What about…when you get a girlfriend?”

Felix laughed, “I doubt that’s going to happen soon, but if I ever have to choose between my girlfriend and you…I’m picking you. It’s not even a question”

A smile made its way onto your face, “Thank you. I would do the same”

The edge of his lip turned up into a grin, “I know you would”

Staring at Felix now, you felt the calm return.

The ocean was beautiful again, the sky was vast, the stars endless, and you felt at ease.

Things would perhaps forever change tonight, your best friends were in love with each other, but maybe everything else would still be the same.

“It’s a good thing, right Lix?” You asked, squeezing his hands so that your nails dug into his soft palms.

He tilt his head, “What is?”

“Love. Them…being in love? It’s a good thing” Your words were low, because you didn’t even really know what you were asking.

“Of course it’s a good thing, but it’s not just about their love. It’s about ours too”

You were confused, “Ours?”

His eyes swirled with intensity, and he swallowed, “Ours, like all of us. You, me…Minho, and them”

“Right”

“What constellation were you telling me about earlier?”

“Cassiopeia?” You questioned.

“Hmm. That” He crawled over to you, “Which one is it?”

You pointed him in the right direction, just over the horizon, where it was visible, “The five stars, it kind of looks like a W”

“Right, and she was some hot Greek chick, right?”

You laughed, “Yeah. She was”

He wrapped an arm around you, pulling you close, “Well, she...died like billions of years ago, but she’s still here in the stars, isn’t she?”

“What are you trying to say?”

Felix turned to smile at you, “We’re just like her. The five of us. Five stars. That can’t be a coincidence, can it? We’re not going anywhere, okay?”

Your eyes widened at the sweet metaphor. Yongbok wasn’t one for romance, or anything of the sort, but you knew he meant his words.

He believed them.

And if he did, so would you.

“The five stars” You smiled, feeling your calm return, “Immortal”

He laughed, “Yeah. So don’t worry about us. You need to have more faith in us, Y/N. Things don’t just fall apart so easily, they won’t” 

“I know” You laughed, “I guess it’s kind of crazy. They found love so simply”

“You jealous?” He nudged you.

You rolled your eyes, “I wouldn’t even know what to do with love once I found it. All I need right now…is a job this summer, something to do, so I don’t sit at home and waste my youth”

He laughed, “Right, there’s the Y/N I know, only in love with the craft. I’m sure there’ll be a place in town you can work at this summer. Maybe a café , so you can get me free pastries every day”

“Oh. I almost forgot. Are you still hungry?”

“Starving” 

“I got you the sandwiches” You reached behind you for the Tupperware container you’d brought out of the beach house.

His eyebrows knitted together, as he stared at the box, “I thought you said the jelly was gone”

You lift the plastic lid, “It was but I crushed up some fruits, and I read online that if you add honey, it tastes just like jam…that’s why it kind of took me longer in there”

Felix doubled over, laughing loudly, “Oh my god. You did that for me at four fucking am?”

“It may not taste the best, but you better enjoy it” You mumbled, shoving the container into his arms.

“I know I will” He smiled, “And don’t worry about them, okay? No matter what happens, you always have me”

“Thank you, Lix. I know"

»»————-

summer now.

It had been years since you’d made each other that promise. 

Tonight, it felt futile, as you stared at the myriad of overwhelming text messages he had sent you. You had texted him back, telling him that you weren’t home, but he hadn’t replied since then.

“More beer?” 

You looked up, to see Yeonjun stood with another bottle in his hand, a cranberry extract he’d brought straight from his freezer. 

You hated beer, but you needed it tonight, so you grabbed it from him. It surprisingly didn’t taste horrible, so you savoured the fruity flavour in your mouth.

“What did you say to him?” He asked, sitting down next to you. 

“I told Felix I’m not home…” You spoke, “I asked him if we could talk tomorrow instead? I hope he understands”

“I mean, to Hyunjin” Yeonjun cleared his throat, “You were about to go over to his place, right?”

You glanced up at him, chest wrenching.

Sinking into the cushion, you stared at your phone, “I told him I can’t come either. He…didn’t question it. He probably was expecting me to cancel anyway”

Yeonjun needed you right now, and you couldn’t just abandon him— no matter how much you wanted Hyunjin, no matter how fucking horny you felt after that phone call. 

Your legs still felt weak, your heart was still pounding impossibly hard, and your underwear was soaked, but that wasn’t important right now. 

Your needs could be saved for another day.

He would understand. Hyunjin would still be here tomorrow, and the day after that, and you could meet him then.

“You really don’t need to stay with me” He spoke, “I feel like an asshole keeping you here”

“Yeonjun. You were crying, at three in the morning. I’m not leaving you alone”

He sighed, taking another sip of the cranberry beer, “Did you tell him why…? I don’t want Hyunjin to hate me”

“And why would Hyunjin ever hate you?” You turned to him, confused. Yeonjun hadn’t done anything wrong.

His eyes were still glossy, fresh tears dried on his face, and you hated the sight of it. He wasn’t an easy crier. In fact, in all your life that you’d known him…you could count the number of times you’d seen him so upset on one hand.

He licked his lips, swallowing, “Because I always keep coming between the two of you”

“Shut up” You scoffed, shoving his shoulder, “You know that’s not true”

He was still serious, despite the fact that you didn’t blame him at all, “Isn’t it? You were literally on your way to see him”

“I can see him tomorrow” You shrugged, trying to maintain a semblance of indifference and nonchalance, convincing yourself that it wasn’t that important. After all, it would be stupid to acknowledge how truly dependent you’d become on Hyunjin for your happiness. 

It wasn’t right, and even though seeing him right now felt urgent to your heart, to your body, you would still live another day and the world wouldn’t end if you didn’t meet him right this moment.

“I guess I don’t need to ask why you were on your way to him at three in the morning” He added, a teasing evident in his tone. You looked over to him, the emerging smile on his face and if teasing you was going to make him feel better, then you’d indulge him in it.

You laughed, embarrassed at how you’d been feeling like a fucking horny teenager, “You know Jun…any other day you would be very wrong, but tonight, I have to say it is exactly what you think”

“I thought you two weren’t going to be anything” Yeonjun hummed, stating the obvious fact that you were carefully trying to circumvent.

“We aren’t. It doesn’t have to mean anything” You tongued your cheek, still trying to wrap your head around what just happened. 

It started out as just a simple phone call. 

How did it escalate to that? 

“Right. I’m sure having sex with Hyunjin won’t mean anything to you at all” Yeonjun rolled his eyes, “Sounds just like you”

You looked over at him, “Just because you’re sad doesn’t mean you can call me out like that”

He laughed, leaning closer, “I’m just saying. He’ll probably be a million times better than the boys you’ve been with. Are you even prepared for that?”

You narrowed your eyes at him, heart jumping at his implication, “You’re supposed to be talking me out of this, not give me more reasons to want to jump him” 

Yeonjun laughed louder, “Man. You should enjoy this feeling, while it’s at its peak”

“What feeling?”

“That feeling, you know…” He trailed off, trying to find the right words, “When you’re falling for someone…and you’re fucking crazy about them, about every little thing they do? I remember, in the beginning, I used to have heart palpitations every time I saw Hana braid her goddamn hair, or something because she looked so adorable”

“What?” You let out a giggle, “I didn’t know you care about stuff like that”

Yeonjun smiled, “I was into everything that was about her, or even remotely related to her. I guess I was obsessed, but I don’t think anything in the universe can top that feeling”

You nodded, and you wondered if you’d ever stop feeling that way about Hyunjin. 

It had been months you’d known him, years since you’d first seen him, and your heart still went berserk at the mere thought, “Sometimes when I’m talking to him, it…feels like I have tunnel vision. I can’t see or comprehend anything except him”

“I know what you mean” He smiled.

You swallowed, remembering the reason for Yeonjun’s tears, “I’m sorry…about you and Hana”

“Yeah. I’m sorry too”

You reached over, to grab his hand, “And I’m sorry your heart is broken, and I wish I can take that pain away”

Yeonjun’s smile was sad, in return, “Me too…”

The couch cushions were frayed at the edges, because he hadn’t lived here in a while, and you fiddled with the corners to distract yourself from everything, from his broken heart, from your pining one.

“Did he say anything? Hyunjin?”

You peeked into your phone, to read the new texts, “He said, I got a call from Chan too. I hope Yeonjun feels better”

“Oh”

“Yup” Your fingers wrapped around the ice-cold beer again, and you took a swig, hoping the liquid would be enough to calm the fire in your heart. 

“It’s from the 7/11 behind Aera’s” Yeonjun explained, as if he’d read your mind, “You like it?”

“I do” You swallowed, refreshing your phone to see if Felix had said anything yet.

Yeonjun was silent, and he sat like that for a minute, staring into the dark corners of his living room, until he spoke, “Earlier today, I was thinking of the summer me and Hana got together”

“I was thinking about that summer too” You mumbled, “Can you believe it was almost…six years ago?”

“Six years?” He laughed, “That’s insane”

“It is. It feels like yesterday”

“I told her I loved her that summer for the first time… and six fucking years later, it’s not enough. You’d think the person you love for six years, you’d stay with them forever”

“I know...” You realised.

“What did he say…when you told him you can’t come? Felix?”

Perhaps, on another day, you would find it funny that Yeonjun had to keep clarifying which boy he was referring to, as if you had a carousel of boys in your life to keep you busy.

You sucked in a breath, “He didn’t say anything. I just...don’t understand what happened between us. One day we were fine, the next he hated my guts. I can’t even remember the last time I talked to him, my own best friend”

“The only thing between you and Felix…is Felix himself. It’s not your fault”

You laughed, realising the situation, “I’m sorry, this is so…typical of me. I’m supposed to be comforting you, not the other way around”

“That goes both ways” He hummed, and you looked over at him. 

He looked exhausted, sat with his legs curled, dressed in silly panda pajamas. It remind you of high school, when you used to study together; you would help him with literature so he could help you survive math. 

You used to sit right on this very couch, frustrated with the books, wishing everything in life was as easy as painting.

Even though as of late, you’d contemplated why everything seemed to be against you, you realised how blessed you were to know him.

He looked so different from the boy you’d grown up with, yet still somehow the same. 

Yeonjun was only twenty-two, but he’d just lost the love of his life, and you could see that in his gaze.

It resembled yours, the night you lost the apprenticeship.

Maybe that was an insensitive comparison. After all, a lover couldn’t ever compare to a temporary two-year art mentorship, could it?

Yet, your craft was the one thing in your life that you know you’d have, even after he left. That would still be the same.

Yeonjun had the hint of a smile on his face as he watched you finish the beer, and he was so handsome when he smiled, but…the crinkles in his eyes were strained, forced. 

He was only smiling so you wouldn’t worry about him. 

“Why do you we put ourselves through this?” You blurted, the effects of the beer settling in.

He tilt his head, “Through what? Feelings?”

You chuckled, staring at him and the spots that dotted his cheek, “Yeah. Feelings”

“At least we have each other” He laughed, “I’m really glad you exist, Y/N”

You wanted to stop moping, and to just appreciate what you had. 

You shifted closer to him, so that your bodies would touch, and you wouldn’t both be alone right now, “I’m glad you exist too, Jun”

He immediately wrapped his arm around you, pulling you into him.

It was always better to be alone together.

The television was right in front of you, and the shelves framing it were stocked with old VCRs, and tapes and movies.

“Remember when there were five of us on this couch…and there was absolutely no space for anyone, but we would watch Say Anything over and over again?” You laughed, thinking back to all the sleepovers. 

You’d spent so much of your childhood here, in this room as Yeonjun’s mum baked you treats. Tonight seemed to be a night of remembering, and of nostalgia, and your mind felt clearer than it had in hours. 

Maybe it was Yeonjun’s arm around you, maybe it was the memory of Hyunjin’s voice in your head, or maybe it was the fact that Felix had finally reached out to talk.

You wonder what he had to say, but regardless, that was a problem the you-from-tomorrow would worry about.

You-of-tonight would just let this night be, and not try to make of it more than it was.

“Do you wanna watch it?”

You glanced at him, “Just the two of us?”

He nodded, “Yeah”

It was well past three am, and starting a movie right now would mean that you both wouldn’t get any sleep, but that was okay, and some sleepless nights were worth it. 

You had work in the morning, but Yeonjun wasn’t here for long so you had to make the most of those moments. This might be exactly what he needed, to feel better. 

“All right” You agreed, “Let’s watch it”

He got off the couch, stretching his lanky panda-pajama legs out. He wandered over to his cabinet, filtering through the box of CDs. You hadn’t used those in forever, far too used to the Netflix you shared with Yongbok, but perhaps bringing everything back to as it was, is what would make everything better.

“What do you think he wanted to talk to me about?” You wondered out loud, tracing the rim of your new beer bottle.

Yeonjun was sat on his knees as he searched for the movie, “Honestly?”

“Yeah”

He stared off into space, hands paused in his work, “Felix…would do anything for you, so I wouldn’t be surprised if he was trying to apologise now”

You nodded, taking another sip of the cheap cranberry-extract beverage.

“I made a promise to him, when we were fifteen… that I wouldn’t let anything come in between us. Do you think he blames me for what’s happening to us?”

Yeonjun glanced at you, soft gaze, before turning back to the wooden box, “He could never blame you for anything, Y/N”

You sighed, “Yeah”

“Do you need help?” You realised, as Yeonjun frowned.

“Could you check the other box?” 

You nodded, joining him on the wool carpet, rummaging through the box his sister had labelled.

“I swear, Yuqi needs to have a better organisation system in place” He mumbled.

“I miss her” You laughed, “How is everything with her?”

“She’s actually visiting soon, especially when I told her I was back in Daejon for a while” He smiled, “She’s almost done with her studies”

“That’s crazy” You laughed, “Is she gonna work in Busan too or will she move back here?”

Yeonjun hummed, “You can ask her all of that when she comes. I really do not want to discuss my sister right now”

You laughed, flitting through the various discs.

“Found it!” You declared, bringing out the DVD and handing it to him, “Will it still work?”

“I have faith it will” He got up on his knees, inserting it into the player, “Does Felix know you’re at my place?”

You shook your head, “He would freak”

He seemed to be pondering over it, “You could…call him here”

You blanked, “What? You…two haven’t talked in months. I don’t think he’d come here, even if I called him”

“Say Anything was his favourite film. Tell him we’re watching that”

You laughed, because the idea was so ridiculous, “You think Felix would put aside all of his animosity towards you…because we’re watching his favourite movie?”

Yeonjun nodded, “It sounds exactly like him”

You chuckled, “Yeah… you’re right”

You sent him a text.

im watching say anything…

If you wanna come?

felix:

i thought you said you’re not home 

you:

im not

im with yeonjun 

we’re gonna watch it together

felix:

you’re at yeonjun’s house??

you:

yeah 

we can talk about whatever it is you wanted to discuss here

felix:

sorry yn

im gonna pass

you:

seriously?

im trying here lix

felix:

trying what exactly?

you:

i thought we agreed not to let anything get in between us

or do you not remember that summer?

felix:

out of the two of us, i don’t think im the one that doesn’t remember that summer

ill see you later yn

you:

sometimes youre being impossible and i don’t know what you want

felix:

maybe it’s better you don’t

“Any luck?” Yeonjun asked, and you glanced up at him, disappointed.

“Nope”

He let out a sigh, taking a seat back onto the couch, and you joined him. The disc player made a lot of noise as it started up, and you feared it may not work from years of no use, but the screen lit up. 

Perhaps the reason you liked this movie was because it was so simple.

It was about an impossible love, made possible, against all odds.

You settled into Yeonjun’s shoulder as it started.

It didn't feel the same without them. There were silly parts that Felix would always laugh at, jokes that weren’t even funny, and Hana would always be pointing out the inaccuracies in the movie, to Minho’s joy.

It wasn’t the same.

Everything had changed.

Would things be different today, if you’d thought with your head instead of your heart?

Or would everything still be the same?

“Do you believe in fate?”

He glanced at you, new bottle of beer balanced in his lap, that he’d took from the icebox near his feet, “Hmm?”

It felt sad, just the two of you, drinking away, at what should be the peak of your lives.

“You know…the notion that there’s a path our lives are supposed to be on, and that every choice or decision we make just takes us there”

“I don’t know, Y/N. Doesn’t that mean we have no free will? That everything is already chosen for us?”

“I guess” You shrugged, reaching for the bottle between his thighs. He let you, and you brought it up to take another sip. 

“What? Do you think it’s fate we broke up?” He laughed, “Me and her?”

You shrugged, “No, I guess I’m just thinking if I made the right choices this summer”

“What do you mean?” He turned to you, seemingly having lost interest in watching the movie anymore.

You picked at the fabric of the couch, “I loved how things used to be. Still, I was fighting it for the longest time because I so badly wanted everything to change too. I wanted to move out. I wanted Felix to support that. I wanted Hana to not be heartbroken anymore. I wanted us all to…stay in touch, no matter what, but now I wonder if wanting all of that is futile. I can’t have all of it. Isn’t that too greedy of me?”

“Y/N…” Yeonjun spoke, “It’s okay to hold on to the things we love, even if you want your life to change. You shouldn’t feel guilty for wishing that”

You bit your lip, “Because now I really wish Lix were here…I made a promise to him that I’d never let anything come in between us”

“You were fifteen. I made a lot of promises to Hana too, which obviously aren’t true anymore… but that doesn’t mean I was lying when I made them. People change, and priorities change. It’s not set in stone”

You nodded, “I guess promises when made, are just hope that even if everything in the world changes, you’ll still hold on to that person”

“Yeah”

“Tonight at the pool, before the dinner party, Hyunjin said that he would finally tell me what was going on, with Jisung, with the media, and why he’s been so stressed the last couple of week. I wanted to ask him so many tim-”

Yeonjun turned to you, “Did you just say Jisung?”

“Yeah. Why?” 

“Um. Nothing. I just…heard about him…on the news”

You sat up at those words, turning to face him, “What did you hear?”

He sighed, “You really want me to tell you? It might be better if Hyunjin does. I don’t know the whole extent of things”

A wave of worry washed over you. Was the situation really so bad that Yeonjun, a person who didn’t even keep up with such news, had already heard about it?

You settled back down, because there was no point stressing over it now, “I’ll talk to him tomorrow, first thing. I hope Jisung is okay”

“How is his band anyway?”

“You haven’t heard their music yet?”

He shrugged, “On the radio, a couple of times” 

“What? They play his band on the radio?” 

Yeonjun glanced at you, smiling, “Yeah. Sometimes when I’m browsing the television, their videos also come up. Their sound is really fucking cool”

“That’s crazy” You realised, “I think I’d lose it if I heard Hyunjin’s voice on the radio. I’d...probably think it was fate or something”

“I have no doubt that you would” He laughed.

“I haven’t heard all their albums” You admitted, “Does that make a bad friend?”

“Depends” He shrugged, “Why haven’t you heard it?”

You fiddled with the blanket in your lap, “If I hear all their music, and his voice when he sings…I might fall even crazier in love, and that’s just…avoidable”

Yeonjun smiled, eyes crinkling, “Why…why don’t you tell him, Y/N?”

“Tell him what? That I haven’t heard all of his music? He’d hate me-”

“That you’re in love with him” 

“Why would I do that?”

“Because if he knows you love him, it might change everything”

You swallowed, “It won’t change the fact that he is who he is, and that his life is the way it is”

“No, but listen to me, Y/N. Love is a…it’s a huge fucking thing. It might change everything, if he knows what you feel for him, the true magnitude of it. He might reconsider his never-dating-anybody theory”

You stared at Yeonjun as he spoke, unable to even imagine or comprehend how Hyunjin could react to such knowledge.

To be told that someone was in love with you.

How would you react to something like that?

You’d never been in that position before, not romantically anyway, and maybe Yeonjun was right. It would change things. How could it not?

“I’ll…think about it”

“Sometimes, the things that can make the most difference in our lives, is the stuff that we don’t say”

“God. You’re like…a complete self-help book speaking at this point, you know that?”

Yeonjun rolled his eyes, poking you, “If someone told you they loved you, wouldn’t that change everything?”

“It’s hard to imagine. Maybe you’re right”

“When is he going back to the city?” Yeonjun asked, the one topic you’d been avoiding forever. 

Your heart stung at the reminder.

He was going to leave, eventually.

“Not till the end of summer, which is still a month away, so...I have time”

But he would leave.

“He’s going back in a month? Fuck, that’s...not much”

“Yeah” You nodded, “I’m trying not to think about that. It’s...too soon, it’s going to go away in the blink of an eye. I don’t really wanna think about how I'll feel the day he leaves”

“I understand”

“I’ve gotten so used to him, and being around him, it feels...natural, and after tonight- we’re only getting closer”

Yeonjun smiled, “Maybe one more month with you, and Hyunjin may just change his mind”

You rolled your eyes, “It’s impossible”

He sighed, wrapping his arm around you again, “Guess what? Last week, at work, one of the HR interns…she asked me out on a date”

“What?” You laughed, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“There was nothing to tell. She’s cute, well I don’t even know her, but I think I’m gonna take her out next week”

“You are?” You giggled, shifting closer.

He smiled, waving his hands about, “It’s time for me to finally branch out. To move on”

“I can’t believe all of this started from Hana wanting to move on, the beginning of this summer” You remembered.

Yeonjun glanced at you, “So then technically, you have me to thank for bringing Hyunjin into your life”

You laughed loudly, “God, yeah, I guess that is it. You’re responsible”

He grinned, pulling at your cheek, “I guess fate does exist”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. If me and Hana had to be over so that you could find the love of your life, I’d say it was pretty fucking worth it”

You rolled your eyes, “And why can’t the both of us…be happy? Is fate so cruel to deny you your one true love?”

Yeonjun turned to smile at you, a glint in his eye, “Well. Maybe… the cute intern from HR is the love of my life”

»»————-

The loudness of The Grove did nothing to ease your headache. It was just a little past six am, but the diner was in full swing, and customers filtered in and out of the joint, grabbing their usual breakfast waffles and chocolate milkshakes.

“Give me just two more minutes, Y/N!” Seonmi yelled, over the counter, as she sped through making the quickest caramel macchiato you’d ever seen.

“Of course” You responded, balancing your bag on the counter as she cycled through the customers. You’d hardly slept last night, not even having the energy to finish the film, and you and Yeonjun had fallen asleep on the living room couch as the credits rolled.

You had been woken up by your very loud alarm, and you’d apologised to him for it, somehow forgetting that today was a work day, and that you’d have to leave at dawn.

Glancing around the diner, you noticed some familiar faces from the Lakehouse party, people you remember seeing through your blur of tears. San and Seonghwa knew a lot of people, but you hadn’t expected to see them around town so soon.

One of the boys made eye contact with you, and you looked away, hoping none of them remembered the harsh fight you’d had with Hana.

They probably heard everything.

Not that you cared what they thought of you, you just wish you could go back to that night and erase the argument, for your own sake. 

“Okay, I can take your order now!” Seonmi squealed, stepping up to you, bouncing on the balls of her feet.

You tugged the earphones out of your ears, smiling at her, “Can you take a breather for me?”

Her eyes widened, in perplexed cuteness, “What do you mean?”

“You seem so stressed and the day hasn’t even started yet” You grabbed her hand over the counter, squeezing it, “Don’t forget to breathe”

Her lips tugged up, “Thank you, Y/N. You know how it gets sometimes, there’s a rush this morning and I don’t even know why”

“Well, I don’t know how it gets since I don’t work in the most popular diner in town” You teased her, as she smiled, “Something tells me a lot of people come here for the cute waitress”

She let out a giggle, “Thank you. What can I get you, though?”

“The regular would do” You told her, playing with the little tabletop jukebox, “Whipped cream too, please”

“Of course” She smiled, getting back into the meld of things, and you took a temporary seat at the barstool, as she made your drink.

“Those people…do you know them?” You asked her, glancing over at the group.

She looked up momentarily, “The ones from San’s party?”

“Mmh” 

“They’re older than me, so I don’t really hang with them much. I think most of them are only here for the summer”

“Really?”

Seonmi nodded, as she piped whipped cream onto your hot latte, “Jiho’s from Seoul, and Alexander, he’s visiting from up in Incheon”

It seemed like everyone your age who was born here, had since moved out of Daejon, in pursuit of happiness, and better things.

“Ah, I see” You bit your lip, even though you didn’t know who Jiho was or who Alexander was.

“Why do you ask?”

“They were looking at me earlier, and I think I saw them playing beer pong at the Lakehouse. Just wondering” You shrugged, as Seonmi reached over, handing you your cup.

“Ah, probably because of Hyunjin” She giggled.

“What do you mean?” You tilt your head, a soft smile fighting you just because hearing his name made your heart pound like crazy, even at six am on a work day.

“You know…” She glanced up at you, while wiping the counter clean, “You and him are always together…people are talking”

You sat up straight, “About… us?”

She nodded, “Don’t worry about it though, the people of Daejon always need something to talk about. They’ll move on soon”

Even though you hated town gossip and rumours, the idea that people associated you and Hyunjin with each other made your heart warm. You’d never thought something that bizarre could happen, but hearing his name with yours made it all the more real.

You smiled, flushing at just the thought of him, “Um…did he come by earlier this morning?”

Seonmi had moved on to her next order, hurriedly adding caramel to a drink, “Hyunjin? Nope”

You frowned, “He usually comes by though, right?”

She nodded, “Without fail, every morning…he’s here. Kind of gives me something to look forward to, if I’m being honest”

“Yeah?”

Seonmi paused in her work look at you, “Yeah. He’s always so…kind. It’s like within the flurry of customers, he’s the only patient one. Plus, he’s a sight for sore eyes on morning shifts”

You chuckled, “I didn’t know he’s here that often”

“Oh, he is. I guess Hyunjin can’t live without his coffee either” She shrugged, and then suddenly lit up as if remembering something, “Oh! The other day, you should’ve seen him, Y/N, he was so cute. He spent the entire day here, just reading this book he’s carrying around, and wow…everybody was asking about him, about the quiet, pretty boy in the corner”

Just hearing Seonmi describe him made your heart flutter, because you could picture it so perfectly in your head, even though a part of you was also envious that she got to see him like that, instead of you.

“When was that?”

“A couple of days ago” She scribbled an order for another customer, “I wanted to ask him what book he was reading, but I was really nervous”

You laughed, “Why were you nervous?”

“He’s…intimidating, and I didn’t wanna bother him. But you two are close, maybe you can ask him for me”

Close couldn’t even begin to describe it, but how else would you explain what you two had?

“Yeah, we’re…close”

“Kinda weird he isn’t here today” She added, “But you can always bring him coffee… Maybe he’s busy, or slept in late”

You hadn’t even thought of that, “I could?”

She laughed, “I mean you two are practically dating, aren’t you?”

The warmth faded, and you shook your head, “No of course not, we’re …friends”

Of all the things going on in his life, he couldn’t afford to get into a dating scandal right now, especially because of you.

“Right” She rolled her eyes, “You should still bring your hot friend a coffee”

“You think so?” The idea of bringing it to him made you giddy, because you could imagine his smile, and it would be such a great start to your day - making him happy.

“Of course. He gets the same order as yours anyway, I’ll just add another to your tab”

“Okay” You agreed, and pulled out your phone.

You hadn’t talked to him since last night.

Since…that phone call.

The memory made you red and hot all over, and you opened up his texts. You weren’t sure how to even start, but perhaps you wouldn’t overthink it.

It was obvious to him how you felt, especially after that conversation, and you would just be yourself now.

There was only a month. There was no time to shy away from what you truly wanted.

No more holding back, or second-guessing.

you:

good morning hyun

are you home ?

His reply was instant, meaning he was awake and okay, and you leaned on the counter, waiting for him to type out his answer.

hyun:

morning yn :)

yes i am 

where else would i be at six am ?

you:

idk haha

im at the diner

are you coming here ?

i was thinking i could, like meet you before work

hyun:

oh

im sorry 

i don’t think i can

you:

is everything all right?

hyun:

i think i might be sick :/

you:

what??

what’s wrong?

hyun:

haha its nothing…

just my head hurts like a bitch

ive been up all night

You frowned, heart clenching at the thought of him being in pain.

“Here’s your coffee, love” Seonmi interrupted, placing a to-go cup in front of you, “Well…Hyunjin’s coffee”

“Actually…could I get some peppermint tea instead?” You asked, and she stared at you like you were crazy.

“You’re asking for tea?”

“Hyun is feeling sick” You told her, and just the words felt bitter in your mouth. 

“What’s wrong?”

“I don’t know, he didn’t say much, just that his head hurts” You frowned.

“Oh” She pouted, “Of course. I’ll get you some right now, but it might get cold by the time you get it to him. Maybe the caffeine will help more?”

“You’re right” You stared at the coffee.

“Hey” She laughed, reaching forward to grab your hand, “Now you’re the one who looks stressed”

“I am… just worried about him”

“He’ll be fine. It’s only a headache” She hummed, returning to her chores, then teased, “Just friends, you say”

It was your turn to roll your eyes, “Friends can be worried, too”

“I know” She laughed, “It’s funny cause Eunbi keeps saying the same thing to me about her boy. Just friends”

“Who’s Eunbi dating?” You questioned, hoping some town gossip would distract you from Hyunjin being unwell.

Seonmi glanced up at you, lowering her voice so the other patrons wouldn’t hear, “Oh, they’re not dating. Just fucking”

“I didn’t know Eunbi is into that kind of situation” You noted, grabbing Hyunjin’s coffee in your hands.

“Yeah! I honestly didn’t think Felix would be either but like…they’re both hot, so I completely get it”

“What?” You looked up, stopping in your movement.

She flippantly glanced at you, “Yeah…her and Felix”

“Wait…what?”

She chuckled, “They’re fucking…I just told you. You didn’t know?”

“No…” You trailed off. 

Is that what Felix wanted to talk to you about?

She stared at you, realisation dawning on her face, “Oh. I thought everybody knew”

“I didn’t” You stated, perhaps too harshly.

“Fuck. You’re…not in love with him or anything, right?”

“What?”

She shrugged, “I mean…you two have been…you know…best friends since-”

You frowned, grabbing your bag off the counter, “No. I’m just taken aback…”

“You sure?” Seonmi frowned, eyebrows knitting together.

You stared at her, “Yeah. I’m sure”

“Well, I’m sure he was gonna tell you soon. Maybe he just forgot”

“Yeah. We’re not really talking right now” You mumbled.

She nodded, “Ah. Eunbi mentioned that. Your fights”

“She knows about that…?”

She shrugged, knowingly, “Yongbok told her”

You squeezed the coffee cup in your hands, a bitter taste in your mouth but you didn’t have time to dwell on this right now, Hyunjin needed you, “I…um, I better get this coffee to him before it gets cold”

»»————-

It had only been a few minutes since you knocked at his front door, the floral wreath hung on the front shaking every time you did so, but nobody had come to the door yet.

You should be patient and wait a bit more.

But your mind assumed the worst, like what if Hyunjin passed out…or fell so sick he couldn’t get out of bed? 

You had half a mind to bring out your phone to ask him where he was because he said he’d be home, but your hands were unfortunately occupied by the coffee. 

The revelation from the diner was still bothering you, but now, you had more important things to worry about.

“Hyun?” You called out loud, in the hope that maybe if he didn’t hear the knocking, he’d hear your voice.

In response though, you heard a bark, making you jump out of your skin.

Kkami.

He was nearby, and you stepped off Hyunjin’s porch, following the sound of his puppy’s excited mewling and barks.

“Kkami?” You asked, tentatively, peeking around the side of his house. 

You don’t know how you hadn’t noticed this before. 

A little metal gate, rusted, led to a back garden.

The path was surrounded on either side by overgrown vines and flowers. 

You hadn’t ever come here before. 

Well, technically you’d only been to Hyun’s house once and hadn’t seen anything except his bedroom. The memory made you warm, and you relived it in your head as you pushed open the rusted garden gate. 

The path ran along the side of Hyunjin’s house, and stepping over the pebbles, you passed the windows of his kitchen and living room.

You were trespassing, technically, but he would understand, right?

“Kkami…?” You called out again, emerging into the back garden, when the little ball of fluff ran head-on towards you, jumping at your body with enough force, catching you off guard. 

The surprise knocked you and the coffee to the ground, and the cup overturned, spilling all over your top.

“Ow” You mumbled, hitting the grass, as Kkami began licking your hand, and the coffee soaked all the way through your shirt. 

It was already cold by now, so it didn’t burn. Still, frustration coursed through you because you’d carefully sought this coffee for him, and now you wouldn’t even be able to give it to him.

“Oh my god” Hyunjin’s voice interrupted your short-lived misery, and you looked up, an impossible frown on your face. 

A frown that melted immediately, with the sight that you were greeted.

Hyunjin.

He sat cross-legged on the grass, across the garden, a soft white sweatshirt enveloping him.

A paper-thin novel was held between his hands, glasses pushed up to his hair, and you had half a mind to question just why Hyunjin was up at six am on a weekend, and reading a goddamn poetry book, but that wasn’t the craziest thing about him today.

His hair.

Wispy bangs fell into his eyes, the color of fucking chocolate.

What the fuck?

Your annoyance at Kkami was forgotten, and so was any semblance of a thought you had in your head. Talk about a fucking cliche.

“Y/N…” He immediately stood up, placing his book to the side, face-down on the grass, and you worried that the pages would get wet, but Hyunjin didn’t seem to care about that right now. 

He rushed to you, bending down to your height, “I’m sorry, Kkami. He…”

Carefully, he pried the puppy away from you, telling him to go sit in a hushed whisper, before he turned back to face you.

You felt silly, sat on the grass on your butt, with just your palms supporting you, coffee soaking through your work clothes, staring at him.

Had his eyes always been that pretty?

The light-brown hair brought out the hazel in his eyes, which seemed even brighter now, and every romance book you’d heard Hana talk about suddenly made all the sense in the world, as you felt yourself get sucked into the depth of his gaze.

“You okay?” He tilt his head, the movement making his bangs shift, and you noticed that the side strands were longer, framing his face perfectly.

His brows were darker now too, to match the hair, and just when you thought you couldn’t go absolutely insane about him anymore, he’d prove you wrong by doing something like this.

His lips, puffier than usual, curled up into a smile when he noticed you staring so blatantly.

“Yeah” You cleared your throat, “You…you said you were sick”

So he just forgot to tell you this morning that he’d completely changed his hair?

“I am” He chuckled, then his gaze fell to your top, “You’ve got coffee on you”

“Oh” You glanced down at it, and you didn’t feel anything, or maybe you were too enamored by the boy to feel any pain. 

He must be a fucking siren, or a creature of some sort to have this sort of effect on you, even after all this while. Everything you’d been worrying about seemed like a distant memory, a problem you didn’t have to deal with, and all he’d done was say five words to you.

“Are you hurt? I’m sorry about your coffee…Kkami is misbehaving a lot-”

“It’s actually your coffee” You stated, looking back up at him, finally finding your bearing on coherent words and sentences, “Well…was your coffee”

“Mine?” He smiled, “You brought that for me?”

You nodded and added, stupidly, “I…was at your front door, but you weren’t there, so I…came in through the metal gate”

“Yeah. I was here” He explained, even though it was obvious, “Are you sure you’re not hurt?”

You nodded, reassuring him, “I’m okay, but…if you’re sick, why are you out here?

“I needed some fresh air. My head…” He grimaced as another bout of pain hit him.

Without thinking, you reached forward, caressing his face, and Hyunjin was taken aback, just slightly.

Your voice was low, soft, “It hurts?”

His eyes fixed onto yours, as your fingers trailed down his jaw, “Yeah”

“I’m sorry” You spoke, “Where does it hurt?”

He grabbed your hand within his, long fingers wrapping around your wrist, and guided it to just above his eyes, brushing past his bangs, “Right here, but…don’t worry about me”

“Let me take care of you” You blurted, touching him delicately.

His eyes closed, and he smiled, relishing in the feeling, “I need to get you out of these clothes first”

“What?” 

His eyes shot open, realisation sinking in, “I mean…the coffee. You have to change”

“Oh, okay”

“Come on” He gestured, helping you stand up, with your unsteady feet. The cup of coffee lay upturned on the grass, along with your bag. Hyunjin held your hand in his own, and bent down to pick up your bag with his other. He slung it over his shoulder, tugging the strap tightly.

You looked around the back garden, and it was so beautiful that you had to do a double take just to take everything in.

“It’s amazing” You breathed, watching Kkami play in the grass, tossing and turning around. Your gaze fell to the book that lay open on the grass, and Seonmi’s words came to mind, “What were you reading?”

“I can tell you that later, when you’re warm and dry” He chuckled, then touched your lower back to guide you into the house, “Come”

You nodded, his touch sending a tingle down your spine, but let him lead you into his house. 

It was crazy, that just yesterday you were so bold, talking about the things you wanted him to do to you, and now…now you were going into overdrive just at his hand on your back.

You craned to look at him, “Are you in a lot of pain?”

He shook his head, “I’ll be fine”

There was another entrance at the back of the house, sliding doors opening up to reveal his living area, warm wooden floors and cosy seating. Kkami ran in just after the two of you, jumping around the futon.

“Do you want to wear something of mine?” Hyunjin asked, leading you to his bedroom. You’d been so lost in him that you’d forgotten what you were doing here. 

You had initially been on your way to work.

“I have…a hoodie in my bag. An extra one” You told him, “I brought it in case it gets cold”

He stopped at the threshold of his doorway, looking at you, “Well, that’s perfect then”

“Yeah” You nodded, “Can I change in your bathroom?”

“Of course” He smiled, and you stepped inside.

Being back here after all this time, was strange. 

His bed was exactly the same kind of messy, but covers and duvets now switched out for a sky-blue color, and his pillows were lined up against the wall. 

It made you want to lie down, since you were severely lacking sleep, but you had work, and this bed wouldn’t probably be big enough for the two of you.

The thought was ridiculous anyway, but it left you wondering.

Last night, you were on your way here in your lustful daze, and if Yeonjun hadn’t been heartbroken, you would have come here. 

The canvases leaning against the far wall were new; you could tell he’d been working on so much art in your absence. Paint canisters were haphazardly placed across the floor, and you carefully walked amongst them, hoping to not knock over any.

Pushing open the door to his bathroom, you placed your bag on the counter, searching through for your hoodie.

Hyunjin leaned on the doorway, watching you, peacefully. He must be in more pain than he let on, because he was hardly saying anything.

You glanced at him, eyebrow raised, “Are you… going to stay here while I change?”

He laughed, “No, I…I’m just…Never mind”

He turned around, giving you the privacy you needed. 

You peeled off your tank top, scrunching it up over the sink to squeeze the liquid out, and you both didn’t address the fact that you hadn’t closed the door, instead letting Hyunjin stand facing the other way.

If he turned, he would see you in just your bra, but you honestly didn’t even mind, or care.

Glancing at yourself in the mirror, you wiped the sticky coffee from your forearms.

“I’m sorry about Kkami” He spoke again, and you glanced at his back. It was cute, how he stood facing the other way, arms crossed, like a kid on a timeout. His hair grazed just past his shoulders, the chocolate brown contrasting perfectly with his sweatshirt.

“It’s all right” You smiled, running the shirt under water.

“Are you dressed?” He asked.

“Not yet” You told him, pushing your arms through your spare sweatshirt, “I’m… really upset”

“Why?” He asked, surprise in his tone.

“The hot drink…it was supposed to make you feel better” You frowned. “Now I don’t have anything to give you”

“That’s okay” He laughed, “I already feel better”

“Your head doesn’t hurt anymore?” You asked, looking over at him.

“No, it does hurt but some sleep will make me feel better” He laughed, “Are you dressed now?”

You glanced at him, a soft smile overtaking you, “No”

Hyunjin nodded, a small ‘Okay’ leaving his lips.

You laughed, pushing your sweatshirt down to cover up, “Why are you so impatient? But yeah, I am dressed now”

He immediately turned around at those words, and pulled you in for a hug, like he’d been counting down the seconds till you could be in his arms. You stumbled into his embrace, surprised at his urgency.

“Thank you for coming to see me, Y/N” He mumbled, face buried in your hair, and you brought your hands up, wrapping your arms around his waist.

“You don’t have to thank me” You smiled, dying but living for the warmth of his body.

He squeezed you in his embrace, “I do”

It was a simple hug. It felt so innocent, so tame, so mild compared to last night, yet the carnal desire you felt for him was just the same, if not more now.

How could Hyunjin be more desirable when he wasn’t even trying to be?

All he was doing was hugging you in his little bathroom, surrounded by potted plants, and fragrances, and candles, and they were all so him.

Pulling away, you looked up, noticing the puffiness of his eyes, “You look so tired”

“I had a stressful night…after you told me you couldn’t come” He explained, “I ended up calling Chan, and we talked up until five”

“Five am? So…you haven’t slept at all?” 

He nodded, a forced smile as he shrugged, “Guilty”

“Hyun…” You frowned, “You need to get some sleep, now”

He sighed, “Now? I’ll end up sleeping through the day if I do, and I…don’t want to waste any time”

“Waste?” You questioned, “It’s not waste. You’re…just sleeping”

“Yeah” He swallowed, “But…”

“But?” 

“But you won’t be here” He finished, “And I would much rather…spend time with you. I know you have work today, I was thinking I could come in to the shop. I promise I won’t distract you, I could sit and read. You won’t even know I’m there. Or I could paint”

You couldn’t help but smile, heart swelling at his eagerness, “If you’re there…I won’t be focusing on my work, Hyun”

He shook his head, as if he’d already prepared the answer, “Then I can sit in the back room. You won’t know I’m there”

You giggled, “Then what’s the point?”

He tilt his head, “The point is… that I’ll be close to you”

Your smile grew, and you tightened your grip on his waist, “You…changed your hair”

His eyes widened, “Yeah. I did. Took you long enough to notice”

“I noticed it the second I saw you. I just-”

“You didn’t say anything” He interrupted.

Your gaze followed the light-brown tendrils as they grazed his jaw, “I don’t even know what to say” 

“You hate it?” His smile fell.

You shook your head instantly, “No. It’s…It… reminds me of chocolate”

His lip tilted up, “Good enough to eat?”

You laughed, letting go of his waist, “I take the flirting as a sign that you’re feeling better”

“Mmh”

“You still need to get in bed”

“Are you gonna show me how much you like it in bed?” He asked, and you laughed.

“Shut up” You pushed him, lightly, “It’s unlike you to ask for validation”

“It’s unlike you to be so flippant to me” He pouted, walking back into his room. 

It was hot inside so he pulled off his sweatshirt, revealing the tight black t-shirt he wore inside. The neckline dipped low enough to reveal his collarbones, and it was different from the more oversized shirts he usually wore. He stretched his arms, a small yawn escaping.

“I…have to get to work” You realised, “I’m gonna make you some coffee first though, is that okay?”

He glanced at you, in surprise, “You don’t have to”

“Caffeine will help with the pain”

He shook his head, “I promise I’ll take a nap after you leave”

“Okay” You nodded, grabbing your bag, “I’ll…get going then”

You passed him to leave, but he reached out, tugging at your tote bag to stop you.

You looked at him, “What, Hyun?”

“Aera’s doesn’t open until another forty two minutes, and it’ll only take you eight to get there” He hummed matter-of-factly, with the convincing powers and puppy-eyed gaze of a kid who wanted to go to Disney.

“What’s gotten into you?” You laughed, but let him take your bag, indulging him in his little request. He was right, after all. 

You had to make the most of your time with him, even if it were stolen little moments like this.

You leaned against the bedroom door, eyeing him up, as he put your bag to the side, and he clearly didn’t plan on letting you leave anytime soon.

He bent down to gather the stray paintbrushes on the floor, “I just felt like spending some time with you. Is that so wrong?”

You smiled, looking around the room, “Why is all your shit everywhere?”

He glanced up at you, “I paint when I’m stressed”

“Oh” You recalled, “You were painting last night when you called me”

“I was” He hummed, “When do you get off work?”

“Couple of hours”

“You don’t work Saturdays, usually”

“You have my schedule memorised?” You raised your eyebrow, wanting to tease.

“It’s not that hard” He rolled his eyes, “You work alternate days”

“Right”

He kneeled onto the floor, pulling out a wooden basket from underneath his bed, placing paint tubes inside it. 

You weren’t sure what to do as he started packing his art supplies. 

He wasn’t even saying much, as you stood leaning against the door, observing him, recognising the tune he hummed to himself.

He bent over, and whenever he did his shirt would fall forward, allowing you a glimpse of his chest.

Every time you met, you pushed another boundary, crossed another threshold, and after he talked about fucking you last night, you obviously weren’t just friends anymore.

The energy felt...so different, but it was never uncomfortable.

3 a.m. Hyunjin was a stark contrast from 7 a.m. Hyunjin, and...you loved both.

It felt so strangely calm, so domestic, so heartwarming.

It was seven am on a regular Saturday morning, and you were in Hyunjin’s bedroom, as he cleaned up.

A pink tube then slipped from his hands, rolling under the bed, and he cursed, “Shit”

“Let me” You offered, kneeling to join him on the floor.  You stretched to reach for the watercolour tube, and underneath his bed were discarded hairbands, pencils, and a bag of treats for Kkami. Cute.

After retrieving it, Hyunjin smiled at you, whispering a ‘Thank you’ as he placed it inside the original packing.

“One day you should really let me organise your art supplies”

He tilt his head, “Can that day be today?”

You laughed, “I told you. I have to go to work”

He shrugged, “Skip it”

“Oh, will you start paying my bills when I eventually get fired from Aera’s for slacking?”

“Yeah I will” He said, without hesitation.

Your eyebrows shot up, “Shut up, Hyun”

“Shut up?” He gasped, “Can’t believe you’re being so mean to a sick boy”

“Oh” You realised, reaching forward to cup his cheek, “It still hurts a lot?”

He smiled, leaning into your touch, “Less when you’re here”

You dropped your hand, heart clenching, “I wish I could stay then”

“But you don’t work Saturdays, so why today?”

“Mina wanted me to help with the stock…we have some new supplies coming in, and just needed to get my mind off something 

“Something like what?”

“You don’t have to worry about it, Hyun”

“Maybe I could get your mind off it”

You crossed your arms, “What if you’re the thing I need to get my mind off?”

He frowned, “Did I do something wrong?”

You laughed, “No, don’t worry about that”

He closed the wooden lid, gripping the box, “Last night…You said Yeonjun wasn’t feeling all right. Is he okay now?”

“It’ll take time. He’s just having a hard time, with Hana”

“Oh”

You shrugged, “Love sucks, I guess”

He laughed, “You got that right”

You sat back on your ankles, looking around the room, “What was the book you were reading?”

“Oh. I left it out in the garden. Could you get it for me?

"Yeah, once you tell me what it’s about”

Hyunjin smiled, pushing the box back under his bed, “It’s about fate”

You slid open the doors to the back garden, cold morning air rushing in. Plants of all kinds grew alongside the wooden fence. You wonder if it was him, or his aunt who had planted them. 

Picking up the book, you saw the page it was open to had been creased. 

Hyunjin had marked some pages, left little notes, annotating it, and he must have read through it countless times, so you asked him about it when you came back, “So why are you reading a book about fate this early in the day?”

Hyunjin was still sat on the floor, except his head was buried in his hands, “Fuck. I really shouldn’t have stayed up”

You immediately abandoned the book, stepping up to him, “Hyun. What’s wrong?” 

He mumbled, ‘I’m okay’, running a hand through his hair, but he clearly wasn’t okay.

“Come on, let me get you into bed” You gripped his arms so you could pull him up, but he stayed where he was.

“I’m fine” He answered, through gritted teeth.

You tilt his chin up, so he’d look at you. His eyes were tired, puffy and red, and he looked terribly sleep-deprived.

“Why do you not want to sleep?”

His voice turned soft, “Because then you’ll leave”

“Hyun…” Your heart melted, “I’ll be back in a few hours, you’ll barely notice that I was gone”

He pouted, “I'll notice”

You smiled, tilting his chin up to look at you, “Why are you trying to be cute?”

“Trying?” He acted offended.

“Fine” You rolled your eyes, “Why are you being cute? You know I don’t actually want to go, but...unfortunately we live in a capitalist society and I need to pay the bills”

“I fucking hate capitalism”

You laughed, “Come on. What’s wrong?”

“I just...like being around you” He shrugged, “And now that...you won’t be moving for the program in the city, I don't know when I’m gonna see you again. I was really looking forward to meeting you in Seoul”

“I know, me too, but you'll see me every day for the rest of this month. Isn’t that enough?”

It was ironic that you were saying that, because it obviously wasn’t enough even to you.

Something flashed through his eyes, an emotion you couldn’t recognise and he mumbled, “I guess”

“Hyun, we have time to deal with that later, but can I bring you some Aspirin now?”

“I’m just so fucking tired of this shit” He mumbled.

“What shit?”

He glanced at you, “If I tell you…you’ll be stressed too”

Your eyebrows knit together, confused at what he was talking about now, “Please tell me, Hyun”

He sighed, running another hand through his hair, “Okay. It’s just…it might upset you, and you’re going to be thinking about it all day at work. I know it”

“I don’t care, I want to understand why you’re feeling this way”

His eyes were heavy with emotion, “Are you sure, Y/N?”

It scared you, what he wasn’t telling you, but you had to know.

“You’ve been upset about this, for weeks, Hyunjin. I…maybe I can help, or make you feel better somehow”

He shook his head, a chuckle escaping, “You can’t make me feel better about this”

Ouch.

“Oh. Okay”

He looked up at you, “Shit. That’s not how I meant it. I mean…nobody can do anything, it’s a fucked up situation”

“I’ll try my best to understand it then”

He sighed, leaning back, fiddling with the string on his sweatpants, “It’s…about Jisung. I had to leave Yeonjun’s place early yesterday, because…there’s been some stuff going on with Jisung, and it’s just so frustrating”

“What’s going on?” You asked, hoping you didn’t overstep with your questions.

He looked up at you, “Under my company, we have this…sort of contract, a contract that’s responsible for our health. Mentally and physically. They ensure we’re okay, because it can get stressful and tiring, for our bodies…do you get it?”

“Yeah. That’s a good thing, right?”

He nodded, “It’s supposed to be, yes. It is a good thing. If it weren’t for that, I probably wouldn’t be eating well, or getting enough sleep”

“What do you mean?”

He swallowed, “I mean…sometimes the company wants us to be in a certain…shape for an album, or a photoshoot. The pressure of that can be a lot, but this…this contract, it basically makes sure that they don’t push us too hard”

“Right”

He added, “It’s because of that contract that I was able to come back home, because they recognised that I needed some space. Most people in my line of work…they don’t get that freedom or liberty”

“The freedom…to go home?”

Hyunjin laughed, sore, “Yeah. I know how it sounds. It’s really rare for someone to go on a voluntary hiatus…like I did. They never allow it”

“Oh”

“And part of that contract is…we have these weekly appointments with a ….therapist, I guess you could say? I’m not sure what her specialisation really is, but she…talks to us and checks in with us every few weeks, to make sure we’re doing okay, and if we’re stressed about anything.

She works with the company, so it’s nice to have someone to depend on, and someone to just…rant to at the end of a really horrible month, you know?”

Even though he was telling you something nice, you could tell what he was leading up to wouldn’t be because his shoulders were tense and his voice was harsh. 

He was stressed even just talking about it, and you suddenly regret asking him to explain it to you.

You nodded, wanting to comfort him, hands itching to touch him somehow, but you kept your distance, “That’s…really nice, Hyun”

He nodded, “It is. Well…Jisung has been going to her much more often, ever since an article came out about him last month. The one you read. He was getting a lot of…negative public attention for the fight he was a part of, so he’s been seeing Mrs. Yoona far more often than the rest of us”

You nodded, unsure of what this was getting at.

“Mrs. Yoona…that’s the name of the woman we see. We talk to her every month” He clarified, and you were grateful he took his time to make sure you understood everything.

“Okay”

“Yeah…and…last week” Hyunjin sucked in a sharp breath, “I don’t know how it fucking happened, but someone got access to her files…which are supposed to be confidential”

Your breath caught in your throat, “What?”

“They…released everything about Jisung, everything he’s ever said in his… sessions, all of the things he’s anxious about, the things he hates about the job, stuff about his family, about his ex-girlfriend”

Your heart plummeted, a terrible feeling clawing at you, “They released it…publicly?” 

Hyunjin nodded, voice getting angrier, “I don’t know who the fuck it was. Probably someone from inside the company, but it doesn’t matter now, the files are out now, for every person in the fucking world to see, and it’s so unfair, because that shit’s supposed to be private. It’s his life, and…it’s not fair everyone gets to see it, and somehow use it against him”

His voice broke, and you immediately reached out to him, hand grabbing his, so he would know you were here, “I…I’m so sorry Hyun, that’s horrible” 

He nodded, looking up at you, “Yeah. It is”

“I’m sorry” You repeated, unsure what else you could say, but you felt sick. It was the worst kind of invasion of privacy, and you felt so angry.

Why the fuck would someone do that?

You couldn’t even imagine how Hyunjin felt.

“Yeah. Me too” He spoke, “I’m just on edge because of this”

“Do they…have your files too?” You asked, hoping you didn’t sound insensitive for asking about him, when something horrible had already happened with Jisung.

Hyunjin glanced at you, eyes widening, and he pulled you closer, “Y/N…please don’t worry about me”

“But-”

He cut you off though, “It doesn’t matter if they have it or not, or whatever they decide to do with it. That’s for me to think about. I can’t have you stressing about it”

“But…that’s impossible”

His expression softened, “That’s why I didn’t want to tell you”

“Hyun…” You squeezed his hand, “I’m really sorry that you have to deal with this. I wish…”

“It’s okay” He cut you off again, “I’ve been dealing with it half my life, it’s honestly not the worst thing that’s happened, which sounds so fucking cruel to say. Mostly, I’m just sad about Jisung, but he’s holding up okay for now”

Your phone suddenly buzzed, because Mina was calling you.

“I’m gonna tell her I’m gonna be late” You pulled your phone out of your denims to text her.

Hyunjin watched you do so, “You don’t have to, please”

 “Yes, I do” 

“Y/N” He reached up to stop you, “Forget what I said before. I don’t want you to miss work because of me”

“Hyun…this is more important” You told him, but your heart was pounding, “You should lie down now, you haven’t slept all night. I’m gonna get you some water, okay?”

He nodded, moving over to his bed.

You walked over to the kitchen, grabbing a glass of water for him, trying not to fucking panic about what he’d just told you.

You had to breathe.

Hyunjin needed you, and it would help no one if you also began freaking the fuck out. 

How could people do something like that?

You needed to be stronger than this, because you wanted to cry just thinking about how Jisung felt. 

You squeezed your eyes shut, to calm yourself, and then finished filling up the glass for him. 

There was stuff all over the kitchen counter, different kinds of Daejon-special snacks, sour candy, instant ramyeon packed into little ziplock bags. 

Was he going on a trip or something?

As you went back to the room, Kkami was on top of Hyunjin, sitting on his chest, as Hyunjin stroked his chin, fondly. He was lying down, hair spread out on his pillow, and he glanced at you.

“I think this is the first time he’s paying so much attention to me” He told you, smiling as he scratched Kkami.

“Maybe he knows you’re sick” You hummed, placing the glass of water on the bedside table, “Are you going somewhere? Your kitchen counter...is messy”

He shook his head, eyes wide, “Um, no. I was just cleaning... earlier”

That seemed like a blatant lie, but maybe he was planning a surprise, so you didn’t push. He probably needed any break he could get. He settled further into his blanket, staring at you, “So now you know why I had to leave, when we were at the pool”

Everything made more sense now.

That’s why he had left in a hurry, and skipped the dinner party at Yeonjun’s.

He must have heard about the scandal in that moment, and the thought of finding out something like that about your friend also made you want to cry.

You bent down to grab your bag, wondering why those people wouldn’t just leave him, and his friends alone.

“Are you all right?” He asked, at your silence.

“I’m just mad…at whoever did that to Jisung”

Hyunjin reached out, grazing your arm with his fingers, “Me too, but…that anger isn’t yours to have”

“Of course it is!” You spoke, eyebrows shooting up, “I care about you and I care-”

Hyunjin sat up, interrupting you, “Hey, hey. I know”

You squeezed your eyes shut, “You don’t deserve this. None of you do. I just..I don’t understand how this shit keeps happening and people actually get away with it? Why do they care so much about your lives-”

“Y/N…” He spoke, “Can you look at me?”

You reluctantly opened your eyes, and he leaned in closer, “I know you’re upset, but can you just…please promise me you won’t worry about this?”

“I can’t…” You blurted, “You know me, Hyun. I can’t promise you that”

Hyunjin shook his head, “Can you try? If you’re going to be around me… there will be a lot of this stuff happening. You can’t let it get to you”

You swallowed, knowing this conversation was futile right now, “Yeah. I’ll try my best. You could have told me about this last night, Hyun. I could have been there for you”

“I know. I was going to, but...I didn’t want to ruin a perfectly good night” He smiled, clearly trying to cheer you up, and last night’s intense conversation felt like a fever dream compared to now.

You swallowed, “But still-”

“When you come back. I’m gonna make you feel much better, okay?” 

You smiled at the new comfort between you, “I’ll see you in a few hours”

He laid back down, head resting on the pillow, “It’s cute. You…trying to take care of me”

You rolled your eyes, “Well, forgive me for caring about you, Hyunjin”

He grabbed your hand, intertwining his fingers with yours, “I will be okay”

You stared at him, and he stared up at you, sleepily, eyes barely open.

You should be the one making him feel better.

Your impulse won, and you leaned forward, pressing your lips to his forehead.

He murmured, “When you’re done at work, you can let yourself back in. The key is next to the window, under the daisy”

“The key?”

“To my place”

Your heart stirred, “Hyun-”

He curled up into his duvet, eyes drifting shut, “I’ll see you soon, Y/N”

You closed the door to his bedroom, peeking at him one last time as he buried a hand under his pillow. Hopefully he would fall into a deep, restful, stressless slumber.

The walk to Aera’s wasn’t long from his place, but you took your time, savouring every moment that warmed your heart, but your gut twisted with the new knowledge you had gained.

You had many more questions about the Jisung thing, but it wasn’t the right time to ask. 

How could Hyunjin be so kind, despite the horrible things happening in his life? You would think that such hate would turn people cruel.

And despite all that fucking stress, he still called you last night. He stayed up with you, trying to make you feel good, even though your problems were nothing compared to his.

Aera’s came into view, and you could see Mina inside, idling away on the cash counter, probably playing a game on her phone. 

In front of her lay a large bouquet of flowers, and your curiosity peaked. 

Who sent Mina flowers?

As far as you knew, she wasn’t in a relationship, and her latest hookup had ended badly, yet a beautiful arrangement of daffodils was sent to her.

Your gut twisted, in part envy and some inspiration.

Maybe after you left work, you could bring some flowers for Hyunjin.

It would barely do anything to cheer him up, but it was still a nice gesture that you know he would appreciate.

You hope he felt much better when he woke, less in pain, more at peace.

You stopped in your tracks, just outside the steps.

You���d forgotten to give him the medicine.

What if he woke up, and was looking for it? What if his head hurt again?

You were so stupid for forgetting it. It was one of the reasons you’d gone over to his place in the first place.

Aera’s was right here and you were late, but it would only take you ten minutes to get to his place and back. You needed to make sure he was okay.

For a minute you stared at the little art shop, but then you thought of the frown lines in his forehead and the sadness in his eyes and your heart eventually won the argument. 

»»————-

The key was next to the Daisy ornament, as he had promised.

It felt invasive, to enter his home, and when you pushed open the door to his room, Hyunjin was deep asleep.

He was on his side, face pressed into the pillow, covers pulled up to his chest. 

Kkami wasn’t in sight, so you walked over to his bedside table, placing the pills, a bottle of water, and a candy bar.

Just in case he was hungry.

He sure seemed at peace, eyelids shifting slightly. He was dreaming.

What kind of things did Hyunjin dream of?

You hope all the terrible shit in his life didn’t invade his subconscious, and you wish you could stay here.

You gripped the spare key, reaching for the doorknob, but his voice startled you.

“Y/N...?”

Fuck. 

You hadn’t been quiet enough, and now you’d stupidly woken him up.

“Yeah?” You turned around, and he was clearly awake and you didn’t imagine hearing him say your name. He shifted around in his blanket, to face you.

“You’re back…” He mumbled, a sleepy smile, voice hoarse, “How was work?”

Your eyebrows shot up.

You hadn’t even gone to work yet, and it had only been fifteen minutes since you left but…it seemed like he’d lost all sense of time, and clearly been dreaming away.

You stood still, staring at his body under the covers, as he looked at you, waiting for a response.

“Hyunjin, I…”

“Was it not a good day?” He sat up in bed, rubbing his eyes, a frown on his lips, and the kind of person he was, of course his first question was to worry about you, about your day, which hadn’t even happened yet.

In the early morning sunlight, snuggled up in his blanket, brown hair tousled from sleep, Hyunjin looked absolutely perfect.

His hair fell into his face and eyes, and his bangs were cut completely wrong, but god, you wish you could have explained to him how much you absolutely cherished his new hair.

It brought a sense of familiarity, and of warmth, liquid fire running through your veins.

Like the first sip of coffee on a long day. 

Like the sunset on Jeju Island. 

Like a book character crafted just for you. Like an angel that fell to Earth.

You could stare at him forever.

He opened his eyes half-way through, confused why you weren’t answering, “Y/N?”

You had a choice.

You could go back to Aera’s and help Mina with the stock, yet be consumed by thoughts of Hyunjin all day.

Or —

“No, work was…great” You smiled, giving in.

Giving in to the only thing you could ever want.

Him.

“I’m so glad” Dimples appeared in his cheeks, as he smiled, “I hope Mina didn’t overwork you”

You walked over to him, voice soft to not disrupt his sleepy subconscious, “She didn’t”

“Are you tired?”

“Yeah”

His lips curled into a frown, rubbing his eyes again, “Oh. So…you have to go home?”

Another choice.

It was time to stop resisting.

“No. I don’t have to go”

But it would always be him.

“Is it all right if I stay here with you, Hyun?” 

The smile grew on his face, reaching all the way to his puffy eyes, and he instantly shifted, to make way for you, “Of course”

You don’t know what you were thinking, or if you even were thinking. You slipped off your sneakers, pushing them under the bed, next to the discarded items Hyunjin had long forgotten about. 

Your hesitation disappeared, and it ceased to exist, so you climbed into Hyunjin’s bed.

The bed was small, not nearly big enough for the two of you, but it didn’t matter because you squeezed yourself next to him. Hyunjin pressed himself up against the wall, making way for your body, and to share his pillow with you.

There were no words spoken, like it was habit - routine that you just slipped in next to him, like you weren't friends who could never be lovers, like this was what your everyday looked like, like this was all normal.

It was your first time climbing into his bed, but it felt like the most natural thing to do, like it was your fate, no matter how mundane it was.

The only sound was the ruffling of sheets, as he pulled the blanket over your body to cover you up. 

The bed was so little - all of your limbs touched his, and your noses were inches apart, sharing the same breath on his baby blue pillow.

“Are you comfortable?” He voiced.

“Mmh” You reached over, hand tracing his cheek, “You?”

“I’m perfect” He smiled, a yawn overtaking him soon after, “Although I’m still soo tired…it’s like I barely got any sleep”

You laughed, knowing he voiced the truth, “Go back to sleep, Hyun”

He nodded, “And…what about you?”

You slid your hand under the pillow, staring at him, “I will too"

Hyunjin’s hand moved under the blanket, reaching over to your waist. He pulled you closer, his chest pressing against yours, and your fond heart melted.

“You deserve to rest. You work too hard” He mumbled.

The guilt of skipping work crept over you, but…you needed to be selfish today, and you’d never felt this kind of calm before.

It was just one day you missed.

He was forever.

The way his legs fit between yours, and his hand on your body, was forever.

He tilt his head, voice coming out whiny in his reverie, “What are you thinking?”

“Just…about you”

“What about me?” He whispered.

You pushed back the uneven hair from his eyes, and his forehead, words slow because sleep was crawling over the two of you like a wave in the ocean, “I wish I could make everything easier for you”

A dimple appeared in his cheek, “You already do”

You smiled at his words, eyes drifting shut, but you had to ask,“Your head…does it still hurt?”

Hyunjin didn’t answer, and you thought he must already fallen asleep, but when you opened your eyes, he was looking right at you.

Eyes half-lidded, he was staring at you, “You’re so beautiful…”

Heart squeezed in your chest, an unsafe amount of emotions overwhelming you, and you mumbled, “Hyun…”

There was so much to say, but you couldn’t even comprehend your feelings in the moment. His body was so warm, safe, familiar, and it belonged there, and nothing could convince you otherwise. His eyes were so puffy and they kept drifting shut, and then just like that…he was asleep.

You stared at him as he fell asleep, at a loss for words. You thought you were getting used to the way you felt around Hyunjin, but truthfully you could perhaps never get used to it.

You’d never felt this way before.

You’d do anything for him.

You would do whatever he wanted in the world, and go wherever he wanted you to, and the thought was so scary that you almost cried.

It was good that he fell asleep, because the next words at the tip of your tongue were far too dangerous to be said at a time like this.

You would have told him you loved him. 

You were sure of it.

You loved him more than it was possible for humans to love each other, more than it was possible for you to love a boy you met just this summer, more than you should love someone you could never be with.

Just one second longer, and you would have blurted it out, because it was too strong an emotion to hold back anymore.

It’s a good thing he fell asleep when he did, and it was a good thing you didn’t say it.

If you told him how you truly felt about him, he would leave you.

You were sure of that, too.

»»————-

You woke slowly, and then all at once, eyes blinking awake, a steady heartbeat pulsing under your ear.

It took you a few seconds, to gather your bearings and to pull yourself out of this slumber, trying to make sense of where you were.

You’d been dreaming of stars…and you opened your eyes to the sun.

The blinds were pulled shut, subdued sunlight hitting the room.

Your fingers were clutching onto fabric, a t-shirt, and you were on top of Hyunjin.

Somehow, you’d moved in your sleep, your head pressed into his chest, which would explain why the first thing you heard was the sound of his heart.

Hyunjin’s chest rose, and fell, soft, calm. 

His face was pressed into your hair, and you wonder how he could even breathe, pushed up so close to you. His fingers dug into your sweatshirt, arm still wrapped around your waist.

What time was it?

There was no clock in his room, and you shifted, to reach for your tote bag. It lay by the side of the bed, your phone half-way out. You stretched your arm, but it was still out of reach. 

You didn’t want to wake him up, so you settled for not knowing what time it was, and perhaps you could exist in this moment forever, and never have it be stolen from you.

“It’s…just past ten” He breathed, and you shifted, to look at him. Your arm drifted, grazing his stomach, and it wasn’t until your fingers touched his bellybutton piercing that you realised his shirt had ridden entirely up, revealing bare skin.

“You’re awake” You stated, pulling yourself out of sleep, but everything was still hazy and blurry.

His eyes drifted open completely, “Mmh. I am”

He’d been awake a while, it seemed.

The reality of the situation set in.

You flushed, pulling your hand off his abdomen, even though you’d been enjoying the taut muscles of his stomach.

“Sorry…” You mumbled, “How long have you been up?”

Despite being wide awake, Hyunjin didn’t stop holding you.

“An hour…”

“An hour?!” Your eyes widened, “Why didn’t you wake me?”

He smiled, “Because you needed the rest”

“But…” You felt conscious, “Fuck, sorry, I was basically pinning you down, and you must have wanted to get up, to feed Kkami”

“Don’t worry, I already fed him” He laughed, chest moving with every chuckle.

You frowned, “You…did? How?”

“How?” He repeated your question.

“How did you…feed him?”

He laughed again, confused, “I got up and put food in his bowl”

The realisation sank in.

Hyunjin got up, fed Kkami, and then he—

“You came back to bed after that?”

He smiled, “I wasn’t going to leave you alone, you looked so comfortable”

Your heart skipped a beat as you stared at him.

You had been asleep, and he did all that without waking you. 

He…climbed out of the blanket, the bed, and then back in, snuggling up to you, holding you even tighter than before, without ever managing to wake you up.

A bashful smile tugged at your lips at the mental image, “I see”

“Mmh” He tilt his head, “Did you sleep well?”

“I did”

“Even after you lied to me?”

Your eyebrows shot up, “What?”

“You told me that you had a good day at work”

“Oh…”

“You didn’t have to skip work for me, Y/N. I was only kidding before”

You sat up, trying to fix your hair which must have been a mess after that unplanned nap, “I wanted to stay”

Hyunjin got up too, crossing his legs over the duvet, “Mina won’t be mad at you, right?”

You shook your head, rubbing the tiredness out of your eyes, “I can just take the afternoon shift”

He ran a hand through his sleep hair, pushing it back. You got lost in the way he did, brown curls falling across his jaw.

“When did you even get the time to dye it?”

A hoarse laugh escaped him, voice still groggy from sleep, “Late last night or early this morning…however you see it, after I finished taking to Chan”

“That’s why you got no sleep”

“Yup”

“Can I ask why you did it, Hyun?”

“I guess I just…needed a change. With everything that’s been happening” He looked down at his dye-stained hands, “I wanted to feel more like myself”

“And this…” You ran your hands through his hair, “…makes you feel more like yourself?”

He chuckled, “It’s silly, isn’t it?”

“No, not really”

 He nodded, “I guess I needed to remind myself of why I’m doing all of this. The last time I had my hair like this…I was still just a kid, before I had this kind of life”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah” He laughed, breathy, “I remember, at that time… I dreamed of debuting and making it big, and I was so…focused. It was like I had tunnel vision. I never thought this far ahead or about the stuff that comes after you become famous. I guess I was naive. But now when I look at myself in the mirror, it’ll be like looking at the seventeen year old version of me, and maybe I can dream his dreams again”

You smiled, running your hand across his jaw, “You’ve come so far, Hyun. I’m…really really proud of you”

His eyes crinkled as he looked at you, “You are?”

“Of course” You shifted onto your knees, to caress his cheek better, “I think you’re one of the strongest people I know”

Hyunjin’s hands landed on your thigh, and he laughed bitterly, “Thank you…but if I was actually strong, I wouldn’t have had to come back to town, or go through all of this shit”

Your heart clenched, and you nodded, “Right…”

If he was strong, he wouldn’t be here.

Maybe you were happy that he wasn’t strong.

A wave of guilt washed over you, so you turned away. 

You’d overstayed your welcome, and…Mina would be waiting for you.

Hyunjin’s hand on your wrist stopped you, “Wait. That’s not what I mean, Y/N”

“You don’t have to explain, Hyun” You spoke, putting your feet on the ground, hoping the cold floor would wake you up, but the floor was warm, warm like the bed, like his embrace.

Hyunjin stopped you from getting up. 

His grip on your arm pulled you back, closer to where he sat on the bed.

He explained himself, “No, I mean…I don’t regret it, at all. I just wish it was under better circumstances, you know? Coming back home…”

You wish it was under a better situation too.

You turned to look at him, “Yeah…but what did you really get out of coming back? A…drama-filled summer, a splitting headache, and…a really messy haircut”

Hyunjin’s eyes widened, “You think it’s messy?”

The tension was forgotten in seconds, and you couldn’t help but laugh, “Your bangs are…like completely messed up. I take it that this was your first time trimming it yourself, without a team full of stylists to help you”

“I can’t believe you didn’t tell me before” He narrowed his eyes, “What do you mean they’re messed up?” 

“They’re really uneven. It’s cute…but maybe you shouldn’t go out with this hair” you said, watching how the strands fell to his eyebrows.

“So, let me get this right. While I was baring my soul to you about my dreams, you were thinking about my hair?”

A giggle escaped you, “Maybe you can fix it”

His eyes widened, “You…you know how?”

“No…but…I can try”

“Okay, follow me” He got out of bed, gesturing for you to follow him, and you didn’t think he meant right now. 

He stepped into his bathroom, clearing the counter, and you noticed how tight his sweatpants suddenly seemed, stretching at the crotch.

You kept your distance, watching as he placed a box of tissues, and toothbrush holder to the side, trying not to focus on that. It was distracting.

You knew how anatomy worked, and you knew he couldn’t control that he woke up with morning wood, but it still made your brain fuzzy, like a stupid girl in love.

“Okay” He looked up you, and your gaze flickered back up to his face because there was no way you’d be caught staring at his fucking crotch.

“I’ve never done this before, so if I mess up…you can’t be mad at me” You spoke, as he hopped onto the marble counter, legs dangling off. He looked cute, staring up at you.

You don’t even know how you got here, from bringing him coffee this morning to napping in his bed, and to now attempting to cut his hair.

He ran a hand through his hair, “You just need to trim the ends, make it even, right?”

“Yeah” You stepped up to him. 

His shoulders relaxed, as he leaned back on the counter, “You’ll be fine. It’s not that hard”

You reached up to brush back his hair, “I mean, I think you did a pretty good job already. How long do you want them?”

“Just so they don’t fall into my eyes…” He told you, craning to look at himself in the mirror behind.

“Do you have a towel?” You asked.

His eyebrow shot up, a teasing smirk on his face, “A professional, are we?”

You rolled your eyes, “It’s just so it’s easier to clean, Hyun”

He smiled, pointing back to his room, “There should be a new one in my closet, on the upper shelf”

His wardrobe was surprisingly organised as you sifted through it, trying to find the towel. 

Your gaze landed on a ribbed burgundy t-shirt; you’d never seen him in it before. A silver zipper ran till the chest. You couldn’t even imagine how good he’d look in this.

“Did you just get this?” You asked, walking back with it, along with a towel.

Hyunjin was reading the label on a candle he lit, and he looked up at you, “Yeah. I haven’t got a chance to wear it”

“Oh, okay”

His lips tugged up, “You want me to put it on for you?”

You flushed, putting it back, “No, I was just curious”

“I’ll wear it for you later” He laughed, knowing you far too well because you’d never have asked, but you needed to see him in it.

Placing the towel on his lap, over his taut sweatpants, you hoped it would also serve as stopping the very obvious distraction. He didn’t even seem embarrassed or affected by it though. 

He hummed, “Thank you”

You laughed, tossing the hair in your hands, “Thank me after I’m done, this may turn out to look like shit”

“It won’t” He assured you, and you grabbed your phone.

“What are you doing?” He asked, “Texting while I’m asking you to help me?”

“I’m not texting” You rolled your eyes, tilting the screen to show him.

He read off your screen, “Step by step: How to a man’s hair”

“I don’t wanna mess up” You explained.

He giggled, loud laughter filling the bathroom, “Oh my god. You’re referring to a Wikihow article? I am truly doomed”

“They’re helpful sometimes, asshole” You pout, “We need to get your hair wet”

He nodded, leaning onto the mirror behind him, as you ran your hands under the sink to get them wet.

“It’ll be easier if I get in the shower” He suggested, and you glanced at him.

There was a smirk on his face at the recommendation.

“I…don’t think that’s necessary” You stated, flushing under his stare.

“It’s not like I’m going to get naked, Y/N” He laughed, “Don’t worry about it”

You shook your head, running your hands through his bangs to get them wet, droplets falling into his eyes. His eyes fluttered shut, and the drops of water trailed down his neck.

“Your shirt will get wet though” You added quietly, trying not to fixate on the trail of water that had made parts of his shirt see-through.

He blinked, wet hair falling into his face, “We should probably take it off then”

“Yeah” You swallowed, paused in your movements.

Hyunjin laughed, “Oh come on, it’s not like you’ve never seen me shirtless. You seem embarrassed—”

You immediately tugged at his shirt, pushing it up his chest, perhaps to prove that you weren’t affected by this. His eyes widened, and he clearly hadn’t expected you to take the initiative, but he smiled to himself, lifting his arms up, so you could pull it off completely. 

Once you got it over his head, and arms, he was flushing red.

“I don’t know Hyun” You hummed, “You’re the one who seems embarrassed now”

“Stop” He laughed. 

You tried not to get distracted, but in the soft light of the bathroom, his muscles seemed even more pronounced, the twinkle in his bellybutton catching your eye more often than you’d want.

You took in a deep breath, holding a hairbrush up, “Here goes nothing”

“If you ruin my hair, you should know some stylists in Seoul are gonna be very unhappy”

You laughed, untangling all the knots, “So…no pressure then, right?”

He shrugged, “Mmh, none at all”

“And they’re not going to be unhappy with your dye-stained hands?” 

He held his palms up, staring at them, as you pulled his hair taut, “It’ll wash off soon enough”

“Close your eyes” You spoke, “I don’t want to hurt you”

He nodded, and you carefully trimmed the front ends, choppy pieces of his bangs falling onto the towel in his lap. You had to make sure it was even, as you measured it roughly, and you’d never been a hairdresser but all those years engaging in crafts surely came handy now.

“You’re quiet” He spoke.

“I don’t want to mess up”

Hyunjin’s hand suddenly found it’s way to your waist, and you stilled, scissors in hand, “Unless you want me to accidentally stab you in the eye…don’t do that…not without warning”

He glanced up at you, despite the precarious position, gulping, “Sorry”

Just as he was about to move his hand back, you stopped him, “I…I didn’t say you have to stop touching me”

Realisation passed over his face, and he nodded, gripping you tighter.

Now that he held you, you felt more anchored, confidence flowing. You focused on what was left of the task, trimming the rest of his bangs as he watched you. 

Any other moment, you would feel conscious, because you were the only thing he was looking at, but today you didn’t.

“Are you almost done?” He asked, voice soft.

“Almost” You promised, putting the pink scissors away, to look at him.

The light-brown bangs fell just above his eyebrows, growing longer at the side, tucked behind his ears. The rest of the hair brushed his bare collarbones, almost a mullet in the back, shorter in the front.

There was barely anything to even fix, and maybe you just needed a dumb reason to be so close to him again. He knew that too, yet he indulged you.

You let yourself stare at him, seconds stretching into minutes.

It was perfect.

“Is it… all right?” He asked.

His eyes were blown wide, and curious, teeth biting into his plush lower lip, with apprehension.

“It’s beautiful, Hyun” You admitted.

His smile grew, “Really?”

You nodded, putting away the towel on his lap, “If you went to my school, everyone would have had a crazy crush on you”

His eyebrows shot up, “That’s…random”

You bit your lip, “I’ve been thinking about that a lot”

“About…school?”

“No” You shook your head, “About how things used to be. Everything seemed simpler back then”

He nodded silently, as if understanding exactly what you meant. After all, he’d just been talking about a similar thing -- about how things were easier before he debuted.

“Did you…have school too?” You asked him.

He laughed, “Of course I did”

“In Seoul?”

He nodded.

“Why didn’t you just go to the one here…in Daejon? Isn’t this your home?”

He smiled, “I had to go to the academy every day to train, before and after my lessons. It would have been impossible to travel so much if I was in Daejon”

“So you never visited home? What about your aunt? This is her place, right?”

He nodded, “It is, I’m taking care of it for her while she’s away”

“And your parents?”

“They moved with me to the city…” He explained.

“Do you miss them...now that you’re here?”

His gaze softened, “Yeah, I do, but…even when I was there, I couldn’t meet them often. I would try to talk to my mum every day at first, but over time that became…really tough”

“Why?”

“I was just…insanely busy. Not that it’s an excuse, but I just let myself get carried by the work, by the... responsibilities and what was expected of me”

Your hands gripped onto his bare shoulders, “When you go back, you’ll be busy again”

“Yeah”

“When do you even make time for yourself, between…all of that?”

He shrugged, “I...don’t. That’s why I cherish moments like this the most”

“I see” 

He tilt his head, “Do you think we’d be friends…if I went to your school in Daejon, instead of in the city?”

“Probably not”

Hyunjin frowned, “Wow. You didn’t even have to think about that”

You smiled, apologetic, “No, I just mean…I’d probably be too intimidated to approach you, and…you’d definitely be dating the most popular girl in high school”

He rolled his eyes, “Stop. That would never happen”

“Right. I forgot you don’t date”

His eyebrows knit together and he tilt his head, “You know that’s not what I meant”

You absentmindedly fiddled with the string on his sweats, twirling it within your fingers, “Hmm”

“What kind of girl were you, in high school anyway?” He asked, lazily leaning back against the mirror, allowing you a more prominent view of his collarbones, and his bare chest.

“What do you mean?” You laughed, “I was…the same”

His eyes were full of amusement as he watched you speak, and you couldn’t comprehend how…easy this felt. How domestic. 

Hyunjin sat across you, shirtless and just in sweatpants, as you talked about the most mundane things at eleven in the morning.

Is this what it’d be like? 

If he let himself love you?

“Minho told me differently”

Your eyebrows shot up, “What did he say?”

Hyunjin laughed, eyes crinkling into crescents, “He just said you were different, that you were…much louder”

You tilt your head, “As all teenagers are”

“He also told me you failed Art once”

You gasped, “He did?”

Hyunjin giggled, “Wanna tell me what that was all about?”

“The professor…felt differently than me. I actually had a full-blown argument with him in class” You recalled, “Man. I don’t think I’d do that today. I kind of regret it”

He smiled, “I’d love to see that. I’ve never seen you…angry. If it makes you feel any better, I’d definitely fail that art class too”

You laughed, “Why?”

He leaned forward suddenly, closing the little distance between you, “Why do you think?”

You lost your train of thought, getting swept up in his gaze, “I don’t know…”

“I would be too distracted… staring at you” 

Your heart sank, at what could have been, “Yeah…”

He laughed, breathy, “I’m sorry. I…shouldn’t say stuff like that, right?”

Your chest felt heavy, eyes landing to the floor, or anything else, “Yeah. You shouldn’t”

“But you have to know” He cupped your cheek, tilting your chin to look at him.

“Know…what?”

He swallowed, “That…I wish everyday for things to be different, and sometimes I wish I was just a boy you met in high school, instead of…who I am right now”

“You say that like it’s a bad thing” You frowned.

“It’s true. Things would be simpler if I was just…some Hyunjin, wouldn’t they? A nobody”

“No... Hyun, you can’t wish for that. You worked so much to be this. You are who you are, because that’s who you’re supposed to be”

“Supposed to?”

“Aren’t you the one who was reading all about stuff that fate earlier? Don’t you believe that you’re here right now in this part of your life, because you’re meant to be?”

He frowned, “Does that mean I’m…supposed to suffer too?”

“Suffer? That’s…a harsh word”

“You don’t agree?”

You nodded, “Things would be simpler, of course…but you told me that you don’t mind the bad stuff, because you love what you do”

“So you don’t wish for things to be different?”

You swallowed, admitting, “Obviously it would be easier if you were just Hyunjin, a boy from my art class, instead of…a world-famous member of a band"  

“You should stop thinking of me that way” He interrupted, pulling you closer between his legs.

“Even if I stop thinking of you like that, it doesn’t change the truth”

His eyes were soft as he spoke, “Maybe you can forget about it for a day”

“Forget who you are?” You laughed, “Before I knew that about you, it didn’t matter to me at all, but now...it affects every part of your life…it’s hard to just ignore what’s real”

What happened with Jisung just further solidified that for you. Hyunjin had run away from the fame, but it still found him, festering into his heart and mind. Miles away, he worried about it, defeating the sole purpose of him coming here.

His thumbs brushed under your shirt, “I know, but just for a day, don’t think about that”

“What should I think about then?”

“Think about how nice it’d be…if we were in another world, where I wasn’t me”

You frowned, “But who you are is... perfect. I don’t want that to change”

He closed his eyes, “I know you don’t…I’m sorry. I know it’s upsetting, but…I wish for a lot of stuff”

You leaned closer, brushing your thumb against his jaw, “What do you wish for?”

He leaned in, gaze piercing through your soul, “I wish for…a normal life. Wouldn’t I be happier then?”

Your heart stirred, “We all suffer, Hyun, even when we lead normal lives”

Hyunjin’s hand slipped around your neck, the space between your mouths almost negligible, “You want to know what true suffering really is, for me?”

“Yeah?”

“Being this close to you…and not getting to have you in the way I want”

Your voice trembled, “And…what way is that?”

“In every way that’s possible…I want you”

You moved in the same breath that he did, crushing his mouth to yours, before he could even finish speaking.

It didn’t matter who moved first. Your lips were on his, and he let out a satisfied groan, as you swallowed his words, his breath, his taste.

Your hands slipped into his freshly-cut hair, frantic as you kissed him, and he devoured you in open-mouthed kisses, and you could feel it all the way down to your toes, within the crevices of your heart, within the depths of your soul.

It was electrifying, the way he gave into you, like it was muscle memory at this point.

“Y/N-” A groan escaped his lips, between pecks. His hands slid around your waist. He pulled you flush to the counter until your hips met his, thighs closing around your body to trap you in his embrace.

A bottle of hand-soap knocked over onto the floor, as did the pair of scissors you’d held so delicately before, and earlier it was so tranquil but now it was so rushed.

He tilt his head, mouth crushed against yours, and it was already messy, saliva dripping down his chin, but you didn’t care.

Not after what he just said.

He tasted of lazy Saturday mornings, of books about fate, of home.

He tasted fucking perfect.

“Let me make you feel good” You whispered, “Please, please, please”

Despite the growing lust, he was still fucking polite, shaking his head, “No, let me-”

You pushed your tongue into his mouth to interrupt him, words slipping out in a rush, “You don’t have to suffer, not when it comes to me”

“I know” He whined fervently, in a heated daze. You were both burning up, and it was so hot inside this room, but he was the hottest boy that had ever existed. You wanted to do so much, but your time together wasn’t infinite, and the things you wanted to do to him were.

“Please let me do this” You mumbled, pecking his lips over and over.

“What are you going to do?” He whispered.

You fingers rest in his hair, and you pulled at the strands to tilt his head back with enough harshness to make him whine, allowing you access to his neck. 

Within seconds, you pressed a trail of kisses down his throat and jaw, nipping at his ear. 

“Fuck-” He moaned, as you bit onto his neck. Your other hand travelled up his body, fingers brushing against his chest, and his hips bucked up into nothing.

You should be more careful. You wanted to be delicate, but you couldn’t stop, and he couldn’t either, as he slowly rocked his hips against yours, to relieve the friction.

Hyunjin was restless, squirming, as you did so, and he suddenly whined, “Baby, don’t mark me”

You pulled back to look at him, “Why?”

His eyes were half-lidded but clearly he was still thinking straight, panting, “Someone… could see”

The disappointment must have been evident in your face because he immediately kissed you, whispering, “You can do anything else to me, I’m sorry”

You indulged him in the kiss, feeling his tongue in your mouth, as he explored you, grip strong on your jaw. His other hand pushed your sweatshirt up, and his lips were so fucking swollen, dripping with spit - yours and his.

It was messy, his hair was wet, and his hands were stained with dye as they travelled up your body, tracing each curve, under your sweatshirt. They brushed the wire of your bra, and he immediately paused, puling back to ask for permission.

Hyunjin had touched you before, but he’d always been so fucking respectful, never going into unfamiliar territory. Despite the heat of the moment, his eyes were shy, as he silently asked you if he could go further.

“You can…keep going” You nodded, pressing your lips to his again. 

It was all the approval that he needed, before his large hands squeezed your tits and you moaned, “Hyun-”

“Last night-” He began speaking, voice hoarse, “I wanted to touch you so fucking bad”

“Me too” You breathed, “You made me crazy…with what you said. I’m sorry I couldn’t come over”

“I’m sorry too” He apologised so sweetly, but he groped you so filthily, fingers pulling back the lace of your bra, ”I’m sorry I couldn’t make you feel good, when that’s all I ever fucking want to do”

He made you clench, “Fuck, Hyun I promise when I came over this morning, I…I wasn’t expecting this”

He shook his head, kissing the corner of your mouth, “I know, I know, you were just being so fucking sweet, you’re always so sweet”

“I was— I was just so worried about you” You admitted, but every word was difficult when you couldn’t breathe. Every word was difficult when his tongue slipped into your mouth, and you gave up on speaking, to just taste and devour him.

“I know. You care about me far too much” He mumbled, pulling back to gaze at you.

“Does it still hurt you?” 

“If I say yes--”

“I’ll make it go away” You promised.

“How?” He breathed, chest heaving, wondering what you could possibly do to take away the pain.

Your hand landed on his lap, and he was clearly so turned on, and you gently squeezed him through his sweatpants.

A loud moan escaped him, back arching at the sudden sensation, “Oh my god…”

“Is it okay if I go on?” You asked, against his lips.

“Please, I might die if you stop”

You smiled at his words,“You’re hard”

“I know” He chuckled, eyes half-lidded.

“Is that because I kissed you?” You teased, pecking kisses down his jaw, as you palmed his cock through his sweats, “Or is it because I’m touching you?”

“It’s because you’re you” He groaned, head thrown back against the mirror.

Suddenly, a buzzing caught your attention, and your phone vibrated against the bathroom counter. Still, you didn’t stop touching him.

“Baby…” He moaned, his voice was hoarse, trying to find his way to a sentence, “Your…your work”

“Don’t think about that right now” You told him, kissing under his ear, sucking over the sensitive spot, “Just let me take care of you”

Your hands hovered over the string of his sweats, “Can I?”

He nodded, frantically, “I told you. Do whatever you want...to me. You don’t even have to ask”

“Okay” You undid the knot, loosening the waistband of his sweatpants, and Hyunjin held his breath, abs clenching tightly, as you slipped your hand inside, feeling him bare.

He let out a whimper, “Oh god”

Your fingers wrapped around his entire length, and you’d touched him before, the first time that you kissed him, but things were different now.

“Fuck” He grit his teeth, “If I don’t last long-”

“Don’t worry about that” You told him. It was stupid and silly how your brain short-circuited; all you could think of was how hard and big he was. 

“Wait-” He interrupted, and you looked up at him, wondering if he changed his mind. Instead of asking you to stop, he grabbed your hand. 

You watched, curious, as he lift it to his own mouth, his lips wrapping against your fingers, wetting them.

It dawned on you what he was doing, and maybe you were so far gone that you’d forgotten how to even do this, and you felt embarrassed, but Hyunjin didn’t let you feel embarrassed for too long. The sight of him with your fingers in his mouth was so absolutely insane that you had to remind yourself to stay still, and not pounce on him in that very moment.

He pulled them out, with a pop, spit trailing down his swollen lips, “It’s easier… this way”

You immediately slipped your hand back into his sweatpants, tugging at his cock. It was easier now with spit on your hands, and it was better as you gripped him tightly. He was so warm, leaking already, and you wanted to just feel him inside you.

It was only the morning, and maybe that’s why he was flushing red, squirming as you touched him in broad daylight, and he pressed his mouth to yours, too shy to look into your eyes.

Too shy, but far too turned on, as his cock twitched with every tug of your hand, hips bucking to feel more of you.

Your grip was steady, thumb brushing against his tip and you learnt that he loved that, because his whines got louder when you did, curse words escaping his lips. 

“Oh my god” He groaned, and his mouth fell open, eyes squeezing shut.

“Do you like that, Hyun?” You asked him, “You like being touched?”

“Fuck. You’re going to make me come so fucking fast” He mumbled, embarrassed, hands gripping the marble counter.

Your pace increased, squeezing him every other second, and it had been so long since you’d given a handjob that you would get tired but of course he was helping you out, rocking his hips into your hand to match your pace.

He was unable to keep still, knuckles turning white, sweat dripping down his chest, drenching his abs.

He was so sensitive, and it was tough because your hand was restrained by the elastic of his sweat, but he kept squirming, so you gripped his thigh with your other hand, “Stay still, Hyunnie”

“I can’t” He whimpered, a tear slipping out, “It feels so good”

You kissed the edge of his mouth, as his moans got louder and your pace increased, hand gliding up and down with ease. It would be easier if his sweatpants were off, but you’d lose it if you saw him like that.

A loud ringer threatened to pull your attention away.

“Someone…someone is calling you again” He breathed.

“They can wait” You cut him off with another kiss, and his hips bucked up into your hands, legs wrapping tight around you.

“Y/N-” He moaned, the veins in his neck strained as he held back. 

Your phone was ringing, but you didn’t care about it right now. You’d been interrupted countless times in the past, and today you would make him feel good, no matter what.

“Faster?” You asked.

“Yes, please” He pleaded.

You picked up the pace, squeezing his cock tightly and he bit down on his lip, harshly.

“I just wanna be buried inside you” He blurted, cheeks red, chest heaving, “I can’t imagine how good you’d feel”

“I’d let you do anything to me too, you know?”

“Really?”

“You can fuck me, anywhere… anytime that you want”

He swallowed, “Shit- I want that now”

You leaned closer, pressing your chest to his, “You want to fuck me?”

He bit his lip, “Y-Yes, but-”

He was so whiney, and it was so easy to tease him, “But you’re not supposed to. We’re not supposed to do this, right?”

“I don’t give a fuck about that. I need to be inside you. I dreamt about you, every night” He blurted, and you learnt that perhaps forbidden love was his turn-on.

“What do you dream about?”

“I dream about — Fuck. I dream about you, on top of me, and about - it’s so inappropriate”

“Tell me, please Hyun”

He nodded, wanting nothing more than to please, “I dream of tasting you, and I can’t imagine how sweet you’d taste, and I think about waking you up in the morning, and — ” 

He seemed like he was losing it, beads of sweat dripping down his forehead, specks decorating his collarbones, and you were losing it too, at his words.

“Do you touch yourself to it? To those dreams?” You asked him, squeezing him again.

Tears brimmed at his eyes from the pleasure, and he shook his head, “I want to, but is that...is that okay with you?”

You smiled, kissing him, “Are you asking me if it’s okay?”

“Yeah” He breathed.

You pecked his cheek, and his ear, while stroking his cock, “You can think about me all you want when you touch yourself”

“Fuck” He groaned, “I’m so close. Please don’t stop, please”

“What do you need?” You whispered.

“Let me touch you” He begged, and you nodded, so his hands found their way to your body. 

He pulled you close, pushed your sweatshirt up, just enough to catch the lavender lace of your bra, in the early afternoon sun, “You’re so fucking hot”

You ran your fingers through the freshly-dyed hair, and when he felt your nails against his scalp, he moaned loudly, and you learnt that he loved having his hair pulled. 

You pulled at his hair, and his hips bucked, thrusting up into the air, head falling back, and with another tug inside his sweats, a loud moan escaped him.  

“Fuck—” He groaned, pink lips parting, eyes squeezed shut, cock twitching as he came in your hand, soaking you.

Small whines left his lips, and he rest his head against the mirror, and you continued touching him, and his legs trembled from the pleasure and the pain, until he was done.

It was only a regular Saturday morning but it was the most beautiful moment in your life.

You learnt that you could never feel as satisfied, as you did right now, revelling in his orgasm.

You stopped, in awe of him, until his breathing returned to normal. His hair was sticking to his face, and you pushed it back, and his chest was moving rapidly.

Hyunjin’s lips were bitten red and swollen, a sheen of sweet dripping down his abs, as he tried to catch his breath.

“Fuck” He muttered, opening his eyes to look at you, after he’d finally calmed down.

Slowly, you slipped your hands out of his sweats, and he noticed the mess he’d made, “Fuck, I’m so sorry. That’s-”

“Don’t say sorry” You told him, kissing his cheek.

“But I…let me clean it up” He felt embarrassed, post-coital haze taking over, and he reached for a tissue, wiping your hands with it.

You smiled at his tenderness.

He was red all over, as he wiped his release from your hands, “I’m sorry”

“Hyun” You interrupted him, “Relax”

His shoulders slacked, and he nodded, “Okay”

Like clockwork, your phone rang again.

Hyunjin’s gaze drifted to it, reading the caller ID, “Are they gonna be mad at you?”

“I don’t care” 

His eyes searched yours, and he nodded, and his cheeks were so red, and he was so endearing.

“How do you feel now?”

He let out a chuckle, pulling you closer, “What do you think?”

“I don’t know” You teased, nails grazing his abs. You were turned on beyond belief, the sight of Hyunjin like this enough to make you go insane, but it wasn’t about you right now, it was about him. 

When you got home, you’d think of him and this moment, and make yourself feel good.

You’d think of the moans, and the feeling of his cock in your hand, and you’d imagine it was him touching you.

“I promise this wasn’t my intention…when I asked you-”

“I know. You just wanted help with your hair” You interrupted him.

He laughed, “Yeah…and you helped me”

You tucked his hair behind his ear, still not used to his new look, “You look perfect, Hyun”

“I’m embarrassed” He admitted after a while, “I’m sorry if I was pushy or-”

“You weren’t” You assured him, only half-joking, “Now I know what I’m gonna be thinking about at work”

His eyes shot to yours, widening, “Y/N…”

You laughed, wrapping your arms around his waist, “I’m kidding”

“What about you?”

You laughed, “What about me?”

He smiled, coy, “Isn’t it my turn now?”

“Your turn to what?”

He leaned forward, voice dropping, “You’re…you’re not wet?”

You swallowed, because of fucking course you were, and then your phone rang again, for the fifth time in a row.

“I…I should get that” You stuttered, stepping away from him.

You don’t know why, but…you weren’t ready.

You weren’t ready for him to see you like that, even though every part of you wanted him. Maybe because you knew it couldn’t last. You feared that if Hyunjin touched you even just once, you’d never feel the same again.

So, you answered the sixth missed call, “Hello?”

Hyunjin watched you from where he sat.

Mina’s voice came in, “Oh my god, I thought you died or something”

“Yeah, sorry. I…wasn’t feeling well. I’ll be there soon” You replied, staring at the cabinet and how he’d arranged everything beautifully — a black cherry candle on the top shelf, a cerulean blue hand towel, and a tiny glass jar of hair-clips.

Your gaze darted to Hyunjin’s, and he was putting on his shirt now.

“Okay, I’ll see you there” Mina spoke, hanging up.

“You have to go?” He asked.

You turned to him, “Yeah, in a bit”

He stepped closer to you, “Are you all right?”

You nodded, “Mmh. Why wouldn’t I be?”

He smiled, pressing you into the counter, “Because you didn’t answer my question”

Your eyes widened, “Hyun-”

“I hope you don’t think of me as one of those guys”

“What guys?” You laughed.

“The guy… who’d let you just go to work without taking care of you too”

You gulped, “You don’t have to take care of me”

His expression fell, “You don’t want me to…?”

“No, it’s not that”

“Then tell me what it is” He asked, leaning in.

“Hyun…maybe later” You told him, “Mrs. Aera…will really hate me if I don’t show up”

He sighed, “Yeah. No one could ever hate you, though”

“Let’s not wait and find out” You laughed, grabbing your phone. As you headed for the door, Hyunjin watched you from the bathroom counter, but suddenly spoke, “Y/N”

“Yeah?” You turned.

He leaned in, pressing his lips to yours. Your heart jumped at the suddenness, and the kiss was so soft, so slow.

“Thank you” He said, pulling away, just slightly, “For…cutting my hair”

“Of course” You smiled. His fingers brushed against the skin of your stomach, and he pulled you close again, finding your mouth with his for the second time in the same breath.

Immediately, you kissed him back, and his tongue slipped into your mouth, deepening the kiss.

“Thank you…for…” He mumbled again, between kisses. 

This time…you knew he wasn’t referring to the haircut.

Your mouth hovered close, nose touching his, “Don’t thank me, Hyun. I’ve only been dreaming about it forever”

“So...you dream about me too?” He asked, looking right into your eyes.

You laughed, hands coming up to his chest to push him away, “Shut up”

“Wait” He leaned in to kiss you again. You let yourself melt into his embrace, and you wanted to ask what the hell happened to his no-dating rule, and all of his damned rules about love, but you didn’t.

A chuckle escaped you, “You have to stop thanking me…”

“No, you just…you make me feel so good” He whispered, “I don’t deserve it”

Your eyebrows shot up.

Where did that come from?

“Hyun, I’ll be late” You told him, and you were crazy for willingly pulling away from him, but you wanted to respect Mrs. Aera and her time. 

There was no hurry. Hyunjin wasn’t going anywhere right now, and you’d have all the time in the world to kiss him when you got back from work.

There was still time.

“We’re meeting at the Creek later tonight, right? Yeonjun might come too”

“Tonight? I almost forgot about your futile mission to make me love Daejon again”

He pouted, and you wonder how he could look so adorable after doing something so filthy, “Don’t call it futile”

“We’ll see who’s right” You hummed, adjusting your sweatshirt.

“Have a good day at work”

You felt like teasing him again, just a bit, “Maybe you should change your sweats after I leave”

He flushed red, “Stop. You’re the one that couldn’t resist me, and all just because I changed my hair”

You narrowed your eyes, “Unfair. You win”

He smiled, cheek dimpling, “I know”

»»————-

Work felt a lot like hell that afternoon. 

As you sorted through the new paint, all you thought of was him.

His moans haunted you, his nose scrunching in pleasure, spit trailing down his swollen lips.

What came over you to do such a thing?

How did he let you?

The answer, of course, was simple enough.

Fucking lust. Or love. For you, it was both.

It seemed like he’d realized that you couldn’t stay away from each other, and you were thankful that you didn’t have to pretend to resist each other anymore. 

“Acrylics?”

“Huh?” You looked up from where you were bent on the floor, hands buried in bubble wrap.

“Could you pass me the acrylics?” Mina repeated, standing tall on a ladder, trying to stock the upper shelves. 

“Right. Sure” You reached into the cardboard box behind you. A new edition of paint bottles lay there, named summer pastels, and you handed it over to Mina.

Just a few hours more that you had to make it through.

You were meeting him and Jun by the Creek later for a night swim, and the thought of seeing him so soon again excited you. There was so much to do with him and you were looking forward to the rest of the summer.

He definitely seemed eager to explore the rest of Daejon, and you had to take him to the night market, the summer solstice festival in the park, to a paintball fest, the list was endless.

You wanted to teach him your favourite techniques about art. He’d asked for your help after all. You’d help him excel in watercolour, and gouache, and maybe he’d love impressionism. It was surreal, and dreamy just like him and you could imagine the landscapes you could paint together.

How amazing would that be?

If you and him worked on a painting together.

Your styles were so different, but they’d meld together so well, and you’d let him take the lead. You could imagine how proud he’d feel.

You hope you wouldn’t get too distracted and caught up in each other, and would actually finish the painting, and god, it would be so hot if there was paint all over him-

“You’re distracted” Mina pointed out, stretching to reach the upper shelf as she stocked new sharpies.

“I’m just tired” 

She smiled, “Thinking about a boy?”

“What else did you want me to hand you?”

“You’re cute when you’re flustered, Y/N”

“I’m not flustered. I told you…I’m tired”

Your phone buzzed, and you immediately reached for it, before realising that you were technically at work, and you shouldn’t be so eager. 

Still, Mina caught onto that.

“Oh my god” She laughed, “Who is he?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about” You put your phone face down, so you wouldn’t be tempted to check. 

“Yeah you do” She smiled, “Don’t be embarrassed of it”

“There’s nothing to be embarrassed of, because nothing is going on” You felt like a broken record repeating that, but it was the truth.

Your phone buzzed again, and you peeked at the messages. 

They were from Seungmin.

seungmin:

hey yn

i think you may be at work but I can't get in touch with hyunjin

whenever you do, can you ask him if the refund for the last payment came in?

you:

refund for what?

seungmin:

the art classes

at the château 

he was registered for the whole summer before, but since he’s not attending them anymore, we’re refunding him

you:

what?

he cancelled the classes?

“Y/N. I arranged the colors the way you like. Is it okay?” Mina interrupted, and you looked up at her, confused by what you’d just learnt.

“Yeah. It’s okay” You mumbled, reaching for your phone again.

“Can you please text whoever he is after work? I need some help with the canvas” She asked.

You nodded, “Of course. Sorry”

Hyunjin probably had a really good reason for cancelling the classes, maybe it was getting too expensive for him, and you’d ask him about it later.

“Which one even is he?” She asked.

“What?”

“Which boy?” She grinned at you.

“It’s just Seungmin” You told her, “And you’re one to talk”

“What?” She asked.

“Earlier when I came by…I saw the daffodils. Who’s the secret admirer, Mina?” You laughed, turning the tables on her.

She laughed, stepping down from the ladder, “Those were for you, dumbass”

“What?” You glanced up at her, heart jumping.

“They’re in the back room. Since you didn’t come for the morning shift, I put them in some water so they wouldn’t die”

Your eyes widened, “Can I go see?”

“Of course, but come right back please. I need some help with the easels”

Hyunjin sent you flowers?

Why didn’t he tell you? He must have wanted it to be a surprise, and you immediately stood up, dusting the dirt off your jeans as you made your way to the back room. 

The daffodils were peeking out from a cut-up plastic water bottle, a stark contrast to the natural beauty of the flowers. Your heart melted. Mina had done her best, going so far as to putting them on the one shelf of the storage room that got sunlight.

As you stepped closer, the scent overwhelmed you. It had been so long since you’d gone to pick any flowers. 

The petals were delicate to your touch, and you turned the bouquet around. There was no note attached from him.

The flowers were enough though, and you smiled to yourself, making a mental note to take them home with you, and put them on the windowsill by your bed. 

You would thank him later. 

You wanted to cheer him up anyway, and since you were going to the Creek tonight, you knew the perfect fucking way to do that. You just couldn’t wait for him to see it.

“They’re gorgeous, aren’t they?” Mina asked.

You turned to see her standing by the door, “Yeah. They’re so beautiful”

“Someone is waiting out there for you” She nodded back toward the shop.

“Oh, I’ll be right there” You grabbed the fragile water bottle, carrying it back out with you.

You stopped in your tracks as you entered the shop again.

Curly hair falling to her shoulders, the color of rose-gold, heart-shaped glasses balanced atop her nose, she was flipping through a Daejon brochure.

“Yuqi?” You exclaimed.

She looked up, immediately pushing the glasses up her head, and her lips tugged into a gorgeous smile.

“Seems like you’ve been up to a lot while I’ve been away” She grinned, pointing to the tourist brochure in her hands.

“I’ve been up to nothing” You laughed, stepping up to pull her into a hug, holding the flowers in your other hand. 

“Fuck, it’s been so long” She hummed.

“When did you get back?” You asked, placing the temporary vase on the cash counter. You leaned against it, turning to face her.

She looked like a dream in denim dungarees and a tube top.

“I drove in early this morning. I was running a few errands for Yeonjun since then”

You crossed your arms, “Oh, he’s already making you work for him?”

She rolled her eyes, “Unfortunately, as his twin sister, I have no choice but to do it”

“What errands does he even have?” 

“Ice-cream to aid his broken heart”

“Oh” You pouted, “He told you about that, huh?”

“Texted me crying last night” She shrugged, “That’s kind of why I drove in last minute. I wasn’t supposed to come home until the fall”

You smiled, “I’m glad you’re here. I’m sure he will be too”

“I’m like the worst therapist” She laughed, “But…I have dealt with assholes and heartbreak before, so I may just be the perfect person”

Your eyes fell to the brochure in her hands, “What are you even reading that for?”

“There’s a beautiful picture of you in it" She said, waving the paper around.

“What?” You grabbed it from her, flipping through the pages.

It was the new tourist brochure for Daejon, and just like she said, there was a picture of you.

It was from the Paint and Wine event at the Château. 

You were painting, smiling at someone off-camera, and you knew that it was obviously Hyunjin, but he hadn’t been a part of this frame.

Maybe that was better since you didn’t need any rumours around town. Still, it remind you of that night and how beautiful it was, well… until the part where Hyunjin told you he could never be in a relationship, or let himself love someone.

You folded and kept it away, looking back at Yeonjun’s sister.

“You said you drove here? From Busan?”

She nodded.

“You brought the red pickup?”

She laughed, not one for nostalgia or outspoken love, “Sometimes I think you love me just for my car”

Just outside the store window, was parked her gorgeous red pickup truck. You had countless memories associated with it — nights Yuqi would sneak you and Felix out for drives, to the night markets and candy shops in Samhae, up the hill, to the river when Minho had his fishing phase in school.

Observing your wistful expression, Yuqi smiled, “Don’t tell me you’re reminiscing high school already, Y/N”

“I’m not!” You defended, “But it was kind of fun. It was simple”

“It isn’t now?”

You shrugged, “Things have changed a lot since you were last here”

She stepped up to you, “I already know about Hana and Jun’s fallout; what else happened?”

You didn’t even know where to start. Yuqi had always been like an older sister to you, even though technically her and Yeonjun were the same age, but you’d hardly kept in touch ever since she moved.

She’d been so busy in her life, and there was so much she didn't know about you.

You fiddled with your charm bracelet, wondering how to sum up the best summer of your life, “I uh, I met a boy”

Her eyebrows shot up, “What the actual fuck? Tell me everything”

“Sure, but I have to help out Mina too” You laughed, moving back to the supplies, “You’re coming tonight, right?”

“To the Creek? Yeah, Yeonjun told me he’s going” She questioned.

“You should come! You can meet him there”

Her eyes widened, “The boy you met, he’s coming tonight too?”

You smiled, “Yeah. It was actually his plan to go in the first plan”

“Fuck. Is he cute?”

“Mmh. He is” You laughed, pushing the cart of supplies towards Mina as she stocked them, rolling her eyes at your and Yuqi’s conversation.

“You ladies are not passing the Bechdel test” Mina laughed, from the top step of the ladder.

You glanced up at her, “You know what that is?”

“Of course. How dumb do you think I am” She laughed.

Yuqi leaned against the shelf, crossing her arms, “What is the Bechdel test?”

“Like...a way of figuring out if a film or book represents women without the stereotypes or sexism, and in order to pass the test, the book should have more than one conversation between women...which isn’t about men” You explained.

Yuqi laughed, “Well, fuck me. You’re still telling me all about the hot boy you met this summer. The Bechdel test can sue me”

»»————-

Hyunjin was waiting for you by the forest trail, later that night. Liquid dripped from his lips as he sucked on a cherry, and he had a bunch in his hand.

He looked adorable, hands tucked into denim jeans, his hair pushed under a baseball cap. 

“Where did you get those?” 

He glanced up, a small smile on his lips, “Hey” 

He pulled into a half-hug because of how messy his hands were.

“Hey” 

His lips were redder than ever, juice from the fruit dripping down his neck. It did something to you, and you looked away, not wanting to relive your thoughts that overtook you at work. 

He bit into another cherry, “I picked them out earlier by myself. At first, I wasn’t sure how to know which ones are fresh, because back in Seoul, I just buy them from the 7/11 under our dorm, but I don’t know, there’s something truly satisfying about picking your own fruit, you know?”

“Wow. How will you ever adapt to living in the city again?” You laughed.

His eyes crinkled, “Very sadly”

“I got your flowers, by the way” You smiled.

His eyebrows shot up, “What flowers?”

“The daffodils…that you got me?” You laughed, looking up at him.

Hyunjin seemed confused, which confused you further, “Um…”

“You…weren’t the ones who sent me those?”

He shook his head, an unreadable expression on his face, “No, that…wasn’t me”

“Oh okay. Never mind... How long have you been waiting here?” You asked, wanting to change the topic because that was fucking awkward, tugging your tote bag higher up your shoulder.

“You’re not late. I just got here early” He explained.

“To pick cherries?”

“Nope, I just needed to get out of the house”

“Oh. How do you feel now?”

He sighed, biting into another cherry, “It could be much worse”

“Oh…”

“But, hey, at least my head doesn’t pound anymore” He joked, as you arrived at the Creek.

The moon was supposed to be bright tonight, according to the forecast you looked up, but clearly nothing was going to plan, and everything that had happened since this morning had been all kinds of unexpected. 

The water was enveloped in darkness, and it felt like you were looking out into nothing.

Yongbok had always fed you tales of the many elves, faeries, and sirens that lived in the deepest abysses of your town. Stories of otherworldly creatures that inhabited the depths of the Creek, which would only reveal themselves in the deep of the night, concealed in the shadows. 

Obviously you’d never seen one, but you weren’t stubborn enough to tick their existence off the list.

He had told you those stories many times before, and you didn’t believe them, not really. 

Still, staring out into the dark right now, you did feel a little on edge.

The water was mostly still, as all of the little streams led to this spot, pooling in this gorgeous area. You thought it was beautiful how every river across your town ended up in one place, bringing together each corner and story of Daejon - forming a whirlpool of the lived memories.

To be honest, if there were any chance of otherworldly creatures existing in the entire universe…they probably would be residing in the cool cerulean blue water of the Creek.

“What are you thinking?” His tender voice, calmer than the waters, pulled you out of your fantastical thoughts.

Looking up, you saw him stood by the edge of the cliff, on the same rock he had jumped off months before, but you didn’t know him back then. He was but a stranger to you at that time.

You did know him now, at least you think you did -- over the weeks of peeling every layer of what made up Hyunjin, you knew so much of what made him, him. 

“I was…just thinking about how Yeonjun is late” You told him, crossing your arms against the cold breeze.

Hyunjin’s lips curled up, “He’ll be here”

“I hope he didn’t ditch us” You stared back at the dark water.

Hyunjin laughed, “Of course not. I think he’s just running late”

“You seem fairly confident when you’ve known him for less than a week”

He chuckled, stepping closer to you, “We can get in the water. We don’t have to wait for him, you know?”

You swallowed, “Get in the water, like…just me and you alone...together...?”

“Yeah”

Hyunjin standing there right now, looking like this, did not help your emotions. 

Chocolate brown strands framed his face, grazing his cheeks, and the rest was pulled up into a bun, messy, uneven, so fucking attractive.

And even if all those tales Yongbok and the town-dwellers told you were false, Hyunjin was the closest thing to an ethereal, out-of-this-world, ripped straight out of a fantasy novel creature - that you'd ever see. 

If those stories had been written in today's age, they would probably all be about him.

The t-shirt you'd picked out this morning fit him far too well, the zipper stopping at his chest, burgundy sleeves hugging his arms and biceps just like you wish he would hug you.

You were surprised when you’d seen him in that, and you definitely hadn’t been subtle enough this morning. 

He tilt his head at you, “Is there a problem with that? If it's just you and me in the water, alone?”

Was there?

The hint of a smile made it's way onto your face, and you reached up to untie your halter top, and even the fiercest creatures in Daejon couldn’t intimidate you right now as much as he did, “No...there's no problem at all, Hyun"

His eyes fixated on you, as you slipped off the top, revealing the swimsuit you’d picked inside. Light-pink, it hugged your body far too tightly, but he didn’t seem to care. 

He stared at you, unabashedly, unashamed, as you kept the top to the side, with the rest of your stuff. His eyes flickered over your body, and then back to your face.

“Your turn” You told him, crossing your arms.

“Okay” He chuckled, reaching up behind his neck, to take off his shirt, and your pulse went frantic and you felt so silly.

Hell, you’d seen him shirtless only hours before, but it was never enough, and he looked so fucking pretty in the moonlight.

You reached for the button on your shorts, popping it open, and Hyunjin watched as you slipped them off your legs, stepping out of them. It was chilly tonight, and you bent down, to put all of your stuff inside your backpack, and you were so fucking excited to show Hyunjin what you’d been planning. He would love it so much—

“Jisung called me”

You looked up, “What?”

“Yeah” He released a frustrated sigh, running a hand through his hair, “Sorry. I’m ruining this moment”

“No...that’s okay. How is he doing?”

“As good as he can be right now, but...” He sat down on the rock, staring at the water, “I feel bad that I’m not with him”

“You’ll see him in a few weeks though, wouldn’t you?”

Hyunjin swallowed, “Yup”

You’d been expecting that Hyunjin would feel better after…what happened earlier this afternoon, but maybe it was naïve and stupid of you to assume that. You couldn’t change his life circumstances. You made him cum, you didn’t fix all the problems in his life. 

You felt defeated, because he certainly didn’t seem to be in the mood for this.

And why should he?

His best friend was going through shit, and he could do nothing about it. 

“Are you sure you wanna do this?” You asked.

Hyunjin glanced up at you, “Do what?”

“Swim. We don’t need to. I know you’re not in a mood to…we’re only doing this for me—”

“No, I wanna do this” He interrupted, “Did I…made you feel like I didn’t?”

“Maybe we can just wait for Yeonjun” You spoke, joining him on the rocks, “He must be close”

He nodded, crossing his legs on, “Yeah, he must be. So who do you think the flowers are from?”

You turned to him, pulling your knees to your chest, confused, “I don’t know. I…just assumed it was from you”

His face fell.

You smiled, to reassure him, “Don’t worry. They’re probably sent to the wrong person. Or maybe they’re consolation flowers for not getting the apprenticeship”

Hyunjin frowned at the mention of that, “Once I get back to Seoul, I’m definitely giving a piece of my mind to that shit company”

“What?” You laughed.

“They’re crazy to deny you” He expressed, turning to you, “Have you thought about…applying to another?”

You glanced at him, “Another program?”

“Yeah” He wrung his hands together.

You shrugged, staring at the dark water, “Not yet. I’m not proud enough of my work to send my portfolio again, and I’m…not really over the rejection”

“So, what, you’re gonna just give up?”

You shook your head, “No, of course not, Hyun. I’m just gonna take some time off”

“You can’t do that”

You frowned, the urgency in his tone unmistakable, “Why…? Isn’t it a good thing to take time to myself?”

“No, because-” He turned to you, grabbing your hand, “You’re so fucking good at what you do. Right now, there will be so many chances…and opportunities that you could get. Do you know how many companies I auditioned at before I got selected at Pegasus?”

Your face softened, unfamiliar with this urgency,  “No, I…didn’t know that, Hyun”

There was so much you still didn’t know about him.

Realisation sank into his face, “Yeah. Well, it was a lot. If I’d given up, do you think I’d still be here right now?”

So much you yearned to know.

Why did he choose to audition in the first place? What made him even go after this profession? 

And then more. Stuff about his life that didn't matter, or maybe it did.

Who was his first kiss? What was his favourite book? His worst heartbreak? The first girl he fucked? Your curiosity would rip at the seams and maybe it would never end, because the things you wanted to know about him were endless, and now that time was slipping away, it was the only opportunity to stop thinking and start asking him all of those things.

There was no point in dwelling on the what-ifs. 

Hyunjin was here now, and you would not hold back anymore.

“How do you do it?”

“Do what?” He glanced at you.

“Stay so fucking positive, despite everything. If I was in your place, I think the apprehension and fear would have killed me”

His lip tilted up, “It’s not always this way. This year is just not a good one for us. I guess because people are finally beginning to know who we are, it just invites so much more hate, and anger”

“I don’t understand people”

“I know” He sighed, “But for the amount of hate, the love we get...it cancels out all the bullshit”

Hyunjin spoke of love in so many ways, except one.

“Like…” You picked at the pebbles with your nails, lowering your voice, “Some people are so evil”

Hyunjin nodded, “Mmh, but let’s... forget about them tonight. For the time we have left, I don’t want you to spend it inside your head”

“The time we have left...” You repeated, and you would forget about those people tonight, because tonight was special, “I have a lot of things I wanna do with you”

“You do?” He looked at you, voice unsure.

“Yeah” You smiled, “You’re going to love it. There’s so much stuff that happens the end of summer, like the solstices festival, and I still have to teach you so many of my favourite techniques! So I...I was thinking that we could paint together—”

He swallowed, “Maybe we should just take it one day at a time, Y/N”

You stopped mid-sentence at his words, “Oh”

You were getting carried away.

Hyunjin sighed, realising what he’d said, “Because…I mean, you know…eventually, I’ll have to go-”

It just reminded you that this was so temporary.

Your thing with him was temporary — whatever that thing was.

Hyunjin would just walk out of your life, and his life would go on as it always did.

Was there a point to what all you had planned, if he was never going to see you again after that?

“Yeah I know” You interrupted, “Let’s get in the water”

“Y/N…” He spoke, reaching out to your cheek, “We came here for a reason, right? You love this place, and so you’d have a good-”

“I am having a good time” You stood up, standing by the edge, and you would.

Tonight was supposed to be special. 

He joined you, staring at the drop, arms crossed, “Are you gonna ask me to jump again?”

You laughed, “You’ve done it before”

He glanced at you, biting his lip, “Together?”

It wasn’t that scary, but this was only his second time here, and so you took his hand in yours, letting him grip you tightly.

And then you stepped forward into nothingness, stomach lurching at the sudden drop.

You’d jumped off this rock a hundred times before, but this time you still didn’t feel prepared. 

The cold water swallowed you both, and for a minute or what felt like hours, everything was blank.

It was black, and blue, and freezing, and you couldn’t see where he was, and your head pounded with the pressure, and for a second, you feared your worries would weigh you down until you couldn’t come up — 

But then Hyunjin pulled you up out of the water, holding you tight.

You gasped for breath, taking in fresh air, yet it still felt like all the oxygen had left your lungs, because he was touching you so close.

Hyunjin shook his head, to get the hair and water out of his eyes, “Fuck. The water’s fucking freezing”

“It is” You shivered, drifting closer into his arms, to share in his body heat.

The water finally settled around, ripples from your jump dissipating, and if there were any creatures in the water they surely would have woken up by now.

“This is what you missed about Daejon? Freezing your ass off? I can see why you hate this town”

You laughed, loudly, gripping his shoulders, “Shut up. It’s nice if you let it settle”

His teeth chattered, and he was so dramatic because it wasn’t that cold. You wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him to you, “It’s better than a cold shower”

“What do you even love about this?” He asked you, “It’s better in the morning. It’s warm and I don’t get hypothermia—”

You grabbed his chin, making him look up.

He did, mouth parting, in awe of the view.

The stars had never been as bright as they were tonight, and he sucked in a sharp breath, “How is it so clear? It’s…even better than the hills”

“There’s no lights here, so you can see them much clearer”

Hyunjin’s gaze stayed up to the sky, as he watched the stars twinkle.

“Shit, isn’t that gorgeous? I can see all the constellations from down here” He spoke, “Wait, I think I know that one. It’s Cassiopeia”

Your heart stung at the reminder, but you calmed yourself.

One day at a time.

Tonight would be great.

You tilt your body back, floating on the water, and Hyunjin held onto your waist, drifting with you in the cesspool of your lived memories.

Time felt like it stretched into hours, as you watched the stars move so slow, as the Earth spun, and Hyunjin’s fingers kept you rooted to reality, and your perception of everything was different here. 

You almost expected to look up, and be back in the past somehow, and the thought was terrifying because as much as you wanted things to be good again, it couldn’t happen at the cost of Hyunjin.

The stars blinked, disappearing every other second, reminding you of a memory you’d forgotten - you’d actually planned something for him, and you were going to miss it, because you were stupidly stuck in the past, when your present was already so perfect.

“Fuck” You straightened up, “We need to get out of the water”

There was something Hyunjin needed to see. 

And it had to be now.

“What?” 

“We might have already missed it” You immediately swam back to the bank, and Hyunjin followed, confused why you were getting out of the water so early.

“Missed what?” He laughed, as you lifted yourself out. The wind pricked your skin. You slipped on your flimsy top, and there wasn’t any time to wear your shorts and you can’t believe you fucking forgot about this.

How lost were you?

“Why are you getting dressed?”

“It’s…like your thing on the Château” You told him, grabbing his hand to drag him away from the water and into the woods, not wanting to spoil it anymore.

“What thing?” He stumbled after you, still dripping wet from your short-lived swim.

“The town lights on the hill. Remember you showed them to me?” You spoke, as you pulled him through the underbrush.

“I remember” He was confused, following as you ran through the clearing, into the denser part of the woods. The sound of crickets surrounded you, drowning your little gasps of breath as you ran through.

The leaves crunched under your hurried footsteps, pushing past the twigs in your way.

You hadn’t been there in a few years, but there was no better time to revisit.

He had to see, and he had to now.

He would love it, you know he would love it so much.

If anything in Daejon could make him feel grateful and happy, it was this place. 

“But where are we going?” Hyunjin almost whined, trying to keep up with you. He was much taller so it should have been easier for him, but he was still stumbling through, clearly not used to the wilderness and the city boy inside him was peeking out.

“We’re almost here!” You promised.

“Can’t you at least tell me—“

Your abrupt stop made him bump into you, and he put his hands on your shoulders to turn you around, “What’s wrong? Are you hurt? Did you step on-”

“I want you to close your eyes”

His eyebrows shot up, “What…?”

“Just…” You grabbed his hands, “Please listen to me and don’t ask any questions”

He laughed, amused but slowly closed his eyes, and you grabbed his warm hand in yours. You lead him deeper into the clearing, and he hesitated.

“Don’t make me fall into a ditch—”

“Just trust me, Hyun” You told him.

“I do trust you. I just don’t want to get hurt blindly walking through a forest” He asked, stepping over the leaves, and pebbles that he felt under his feet.

Your smile grew, as you finally made it to the clearing, a view prettier than anything in the entire universe.

You hadn’t come here in ages. 

You turned to face him, catching your breath, “Okay. We’re here”

“Where? Can I open my eyes now?”

You laughed, because Hyunjin was such a hopeless romantic, but he was so impatient too.

Amongst the Daejon woods, was a clearing, where the terrain was flat, and the woodland plants grew tall - a mix of orange and purple flowers, surrounded by thin weeds. 

But, the most beautiful part of this clearing, was what you’d brought him to witness. 

“You can open your eyes, Hyun”

Confusion painted his face, in the form of suspicious furrowed eyebrows, until he finally looked up, realising just why you brought him here.

His mouth fell open in awe, eyes widening, as he took in the scene.

“Oh my god”

Soft, twinkling lights illuminated the entire clearing.

A hundred of them, bright lights, flying above the canopy, like stars shining through the canopy.

Stars that flew around, bumping into each other, creating paths and patterns that could never be replicated even in constellations.

Fireflies.

Hyunjin’s eyes were lit up, mouth parted in amazement like never before, watching the little lightning bugs illuminate the dark woods.

“Oh my god” Hyunjin repeated, a chuckle of disbelief escaping him. He clutched his stomach tightly, as if he couldn’t believe he were here, turning a full circle to take in the view.

“There’s so many of them” He breathed.

A smile overtook your lips, voice soft, “Do you like it?”

He turned to you, pure adoration in his eyes, like a kid on Christmas morning, like a boy in love, but not with you, with what you’d done for him.

“How did you know they would be here?”

You shrugged, coyly, “A coincidence”

His gaze softened at your words, “You planned this”

“I did…I wanted to show them to you”

He looked up again, getting distracted in the way the fireflies flew above the canopy, “It’s so beautiful”

You swallowed, “I wanted to show them to you…before you have to leave. I thought it’d make you feel better, even if only temporarily. I know you’re having a hard time, and I just thought you should see this because—”

When you looked up at him, he was staring at you, not the fireflies anymore, an unreadable expression in his eyes.

His gaze pierced through you, and then flickered to your lips, “Thank you”

You swallowed, suddenly nervous as you looked up at him, “Earlier you said you wish you had a different life, and you’d be happier somehow and I want you to know that’s not true. You can be happy in this life, I know we still have a lot of time, but I don’t want to miss any moment—”

Hyunjin cut you off, pressing his lips to yours.

You let out a noise of surprise, as his arms gripped you, pulling your body closer to his. You stumbled into his embrace, immediately kissing him back. His chest was still glistening with water droplets, and his hair was dripping, sticking to your face, to your lips.

Cold, and wet fingers grabbed your cheek.

His mouth felt hot on yours, as he pressed his chest to yours, wasting no time in pushing his tongue into your mouth.

“Hyun-” You whined, pulling back an inch to breathe, but you didn’t want to breathe anything except his taste.

“I have to tell you something, Y/N” 

At first you thought you misheard him.

“W-what?” You paused.

He kissed you again, holding your face in his hands, “It's...very important”

His voice was suddenly heavy with emotion, and you realised that no you did not want to know.

You’d push your curiosity to the side, and fuck that, because you didn’t want to know anything that would break your heart, and what Hyunjin was going to say definitely would.

“I don’t wanna know. Not now. Just kiss me, please”

Hyunjin’s gaze softened, “Are you sure?”

“Please” You pressed your mouth to his, “I just want you right now”

“Y/N…” He breathed, against your lips.

It was hard to speak, and you didn’t even know what you were feeling at the moment, “I just want tonight to be perfect, and I want you so much”

“Okay” He breathed, pulling your face back to his, and you kissed him, trying to erase everything he was going to say, and this could have been a beautiful moment but perhaps you weren’t the only self-destructive one.

Perhaps it was far too perfect for Hyunjin to handle, and that’s why he was trying everything he could to destroy it, but you wouldn’t let him.

So, you kissed him, until you both sat on the grass, and your knees touched the forest floor. He was on his knees too, holding you to him, hands clutching your face to still have the semblance of control. 

You kissed him until the pebbles and rocks under you stopped hurting, leaving imprints on your skin forever just like he had.

You kissed him until he’d swallowed all your tears, and until denial tasted just like the cherries he had sucked on. 

You kissed him until he was hard, and he mumbled, “Baby...”

He pressed you to the floor, crawling on top of you.

He never broke the open-mouthed kiss, and everything was so wet, with your spit, with the water from the Creek that still hadn’t dried off, with your soaking underwear. 

His weight on top of you was new, and it was unfamiliar, and you don’t know when it would ever happen again, so you tried to memorise it. Your hands sifted through his freshly-cut hair, and it remind of you this morning, and of how beautiful he’d looked, and how different things were.

Hyunjin at seven am was so different from him now.

You wanted to learn him, and discover who he was at every hour of the day. 

Hyunjin’s hands grabbed yours, and in a single move, he pinned them over your head, taking control of you.

Your hands pressed into the grass, and the rocks, and you were at his complete mercy.

“I…couldn’t focus on work today because of you” You complained, when he pulled back to breathe.

“What were you thinking about?” He whispered, kissing the corner of your mouth, pushing his knee between your legs.

“Fuck” You mumbled, and his other hand dropped to your stomach, holding your body down, and it was so fucking sexy you couldn’t stop your whines, “About how pretty you look, about how big-”

He let out a groan, pushing his hardening cock against your swimsuit bottoms, “It’ll feel more perfect when I’m inside you”

Blood rushed to your head, and you tilt your head back, as he planted kisses all over your collarbone. His hand slid under your sweater, squeezing your tits in his hands as he grind against you.

You wanted to touch him, but he didn’t let you, keeping your hands at bay, and it was so fucking hot and you were so wet.

“This swimsuit…is so fucking adorable on you” He mumbled, fiddling with the strings of your bikini bottom, “Is it okay if I touch you?”

“Yes, yes, please”

Why was he even asking?

And then he pressed his fingers into your core, over the thin fabric, and you almost passed out at the touch.

“Fuck” You moaned, squirming, “Don’t tease me”

He nodded, swallowing your whimpers, “I won’t. I was just making sure you’re ready”

“I am” You all but begged.

“I know” He smiled against your lips, and true to his promise, pulled the waistband of your pastel-blue panties forward. 

You could still see the fireflies from here, the twinkling lights in the sky, and you wanted to remember how that looked, but Hyunjin was rolling his hips against yours, and you couldn’t focus on anything else.

You let out a loud moan, when his hand slipped inside your underwear, and he was so fucking sweet as he kissed your cheek, “Will you let me finger you now, baby?”

“M-”

“Y/N?” A familiar voice interrupted, echoing in the woods, and Hyunjin immediately stopped, pulling back to look at you.

“Did you hear that?” He asked you, eyes half-lidded.

You were so distracted by his dilated pupils that you didn’t register that someone was calling your name, and you would have chosen to ignore it, but Hyunjin was already standing up, pulling you to your feet.

“Y/N?” The voice sang again.

“Shit” You cursed, squeezing your eyes shut.

“Who is that?” Hyunjin asked, fixing the straps of your top, pushing them back onto your shoulders.

You ran your hands over your face, trying to gather your bearings, but your head was filled with a cloud of lust, “It’s…her”

His eyebrows shot up, as he tugged your sweater over your swimsuit, “Who?”

“Y/N?” The voice called out again, as footsteps ran out into where you were. 

She stopped, feet skidding against the dirt, as soon as she saw the two of you.

Hyunjin turned to her, eyes widening.

You flushed with embarrassment, because if you heard her…that means she definitely heard you moan.

She stood still, staring at the two of you, and it would almost be comical if you didn’t feel slightly ashamed. 

Her rose-gold hair was pulled up into two ponytails, a red swimsuit hugging her curves.

“You must be Hyunjin” She blurted, “I’ve heard so much about you”

“Oh” He trailed off, looking back at you, and you could see he was trying to restrain the hard-on in his swim-shorts.

You were still so lost, head fuzzy, because what was Hyunjin going to tell you before you interrupted him?

Yuqi looked apologetic, “Sorry I ran in here, I parked my car and then I saw your clothes out by the rocks, and I assumed the worst, like you never know what goes on in these woods, there could be some serial killer, and I literally fell asleep watching Friday the 13th last night, and if you’ve seen that, you’d know that—“

“I haven’t seen it” Hyunjin interrupted her.

“Oh. You should. It’s…nice”

“I don’t really like horror movies” 

“I’m Yeonjun’s sister” She added, an awkward smile.

“Ohh. You look like him”

“Yeah. Cause we’re related”

She looked around the glade, “Did she bring you out here to see the fireflies? I swear she and Felix are so obsessed with thi—”

“Where’s Yeonjun?” You interrupted.

“He’s already in the water” She jut her thumb back towards the water, “I’ll see you guys there!”

She ran back through the woods, and it’d be funny if you didn’t feel so frustrated. You and Hyunjin had horrible timing…or maybe it was fate’s way of saying you weren’t supposed to be doing this.

“She definitely knows what we were doing” Hyunjin spoke, softly, hand slipping inside his shorts to adjust, and you looked away.

“Yeah, but you can trust Yuqi. She…won’t tell anyone”

This was reckless. There were a lot of kids and groups from town that hiked in the woods, especially in the summer.

Hyunjin was already dealing with scandal upon scandal, he didn’t need you to make it worse.

His gaze fell to the floor, “I’m sorry for getting carried away. That was stupid”

You nodded, “Yeah. It was”

“We should be more careful” He mumbled, but you could see the frustration in his eyes as he began walking back.

You followed him, trying to calm your breathing, “It’s a good thing it was just her”

“I didn’t even know Yeonjun has a sister”

“Yeah, she lives in Busan” You told him.

“She has a car?”

“Yeah”

“I was going to rent one” He spoke, as you fell into step with him.

"You were?” You turned to him, “What do you need a car for?”

He shrugged, pushing through the rustling leaves, “I…got us tickets to something”

“Well, I’m sure Yuqi would let you have it for an evening. You don’t have to rent one”

“That sounds good” He nodded, shooting you a soft smile as you finally caught up to Yuqi and Yeonjun, who were already in the water. 

They were splashing each other already, asking you to jump in.

Hyunjin headed to them, but you reached out to him, “By the way, tickets for what?”

He laughed, looking sheepish, “Can that part still be a surprise?” 

»»————-

Fortunately for you, the curiosity about the surprise only lasted for a day.

“You’ve never seen Jaws?” 

“I’m not really a monster movie kind of guy” Hyunjin replied, arms crossed against his chest as Yuqi gaped at him, an almost comical expression on her face.

“Does that mean you’ve never seen Chucky either?”

“I happen to like dolls, and I don’t want to change that”

They’d only known each other a little more than a day, and were already comfortable enough with each other, thanks to the hours spent last night swimming and getting to know each other. 

“You’re fucking kidding me” She stated, then turned to you, “Where did you find this guy?”

“Leave him alone, Yuqi” Yeonjun replied before you could speak, and you laughed.

“No, because monster movies are easily the best genre!” She told Yeonjun, who’d already stopped listening, and was checking the tickets on his phone. 

The drive-in theater was busy tonight, as a crazy amount of families and couples had come out to watch the iconic screening of Jaws. 

Hyunijn had insisted that you come here tonight, another thing off your list that you’d mentioned to him, and the fact that Yuqi just happened to have a car — was a cherry on top of a perfect coincidence.

When they’d learnt of your plans, Hyunjin had been kind enough to let them come along with you, because he enjoyed their company as much as you did.

You don’t know why Hyunjin was rushing through the things, but you couldn’t complain. 

Every summer, cars would line up until Mrs. Erin’s noodle shop, and a huge projector and screen were set up, facing the woods.

They usually played the same movies on loop, so you’d already got tired of the the same blockbuster tropes. Being Yongbok’s friend, you had had no choice but to indulge in every single one of these films.

Still, tonight was different, because Hyunjin was here now.

Every time you came in the past, you would borrow Yuqi’s car since her pick-up truck had space in the back to squeeze all of your friends, with thick blankets and enough snacks to last double-features. Her truck was also ideal for star-gazing and movie nights like this. 

You stood leaning against it, in the minutes before the movie began. As of now, they were only showing previews and trailers, as everybody parked their cars.

“I’m not a fan of watching people get ripped apart” Hyunjin replied to her, his voice low.

“Can’t believe you’re a softie” She tilt her head, as if analysing him top-to-down. Hyunjin’s cheeks turned red at her scrutinising gaze and he turned to you, for help. 

He looked extra adorable today, in a white button-up shirt, and faded boyfriend-fit jeans.

You laughed, pushing the pebbles at your feet, “You’re on your own, Hyun”

He sighed, turning to Yuqi, “It’s not that I don’t enjoy the thrill, I just prefer to indulge in a different kind of …excitement”

“Yongbok must hate you” She laughed, “He’s obsessed with those movies. Have you two met yet?”

Your eyebrows shot up, and you saw Hyunjin stiffen. 

You spoke, before he could, “Um, yeah they have”

“How did he approve of you then?” She asked, eyes wide.

“Yongbok doesn’t have to approve of anybody” You rolled your eyes.

“Yeah, yeah. You two just don’t seem like you’d get along” She told him. 

Hyunjin’s expression was calm, and reserved as she said that. You realised that while you’d heard plenty of opinions from Yongbok about him, you had no idea what Hyunjin felt about him.

Hyunjin smiled, “He’s a cool guy. I’m sure if we hung out more, we’d get along”

His eyes landed on yours, and you agreed, “Yeah. I’m sure you would”

“So then what do you like? Don’t tell me you’re into that cheesy Notebook shit” Yuqi narrowed her eyes at him. 

“I’m sorry I just happen to have a more refined taste than you, Yuqi” Hyunjin replied, catching you and her by surprise as she gasped. You laughed, proud of how he’d already learned to deal with her.

“Okay. I see you, Hwang Hyunjin” She hummed, smiling at him.

“These tickets should get us a popcorn and soda combo. Is there anything else you need, guys?” Yeonjun asked, squeezing his phone back into his jeans pocket.

“That sounds good” You answered, “I can go get the snacks”

“No, me and Hyunjin will go” Yeonjun smiled, looping an arm around him, “Won’t we?”

Hyunjin smiled, shy gaze falling to the floor, “Yeah, of course”

They walked to the pop-up booths, and you and Yuqi hung back, watching the crowd filter in.

“He’s sweet”

“He is, isn’t he?”

“Where did you find him?”

You laughed, “I didn’t. Hana found him. Kind of”

“Where is she, by the way?” Yuqi asked, glancing up at you.

“I haven’t seen her since the party” You shrugged.

“Ah. The party Yeonjun went to?”

“The very same” You sighed, wanting to forget the nightmare Lakehouse party, “You and Hyunjin were talking a lot last night in the water. What about?” 

She waved a hand dismissively, “Oh. He was just asking me about Felix”

You turned to her, “Felix? What did Hyunjin want to know about him?”

“Just a lot of random things, it wasn’t an important conversation"

What random things? 

You searched the crowd for the boys, but your gaze landed on a recognisable silhouette, walking away from you, clutching a tub of popcorn tightly in his hands.

Light blonde hair that stood out in the crowd, and he was in a leather jacket, and there was a grin on his face. You’d missed seeing that so much.

He looked so different, yet so familiar, and your heart ached in the wake of all that familiarity.

“Oh, isn’t that him right there?” Yuqi asked.

“Yeah. It is”

“Aren’t you gonna go say hi?” She laughed, confused at your somber tone.

“Um. I should. I’ll be right back, okay?”

“Of course. Tell him I said hi!” She smiled. 

You walked over to him and you felt nervous, but you had to have this conversation sooner, than later.

“Lix?”

He turned around at your voice, eyes widening in happy recognition.

Immediately, he smiled, his entire face lit up, “Hey. It’s been a while since I saw you”

You hadn’t seen or talked to him in what felt like forever.

“I didn’t think you’d be coming tonight”

He laughed, “Why would I not? You know how much I love Jaws”

“Right. I…remember”

“What are you doing here?” He asked, stepping closer, to hear you better over all of the crowd, and the sounds of the previews.

“I…” You trailed, point to the projector, “The movie”

“Right. The movie” He laughed, tub of caramel popcorn in his hands and Yongbok hated caramel so you wonder why he was holding it this tight.

“Are you here alone?” 

“No, I came with Eunbi” He responded, gesturing to where she probably was, not that you cared for that right now.

“Oh”

He tilt his head, “Did you get the flowers, by the way?”

Your eyes widened, “You…sent me the flowers?”

He chuckled, “Did you hate them or something?”

“No. I...” You trailed off, unable to comprehend why Felix would send you flowers, of all things in the world, “I love them. They’re great...”

Was that his attempt at an apology?

“I’m glad” His eyes crinkled.

“Yuqi’s here” You blurted, wanting to not talk about this any longer, because it just made no fucking sense.

“Yuqi?” He laughed, seemingly not affected by your ignorance to his gift, “She’s back in town?”

“Yeah. She drove in last night”

“From Busan?”

“Mmh” You nodded.

“She’s still the same?”

You smiled, “Yeah. She is exactly the same”

He looked around, trying to spot the iconic red pickup truck, “So you’re here with them then?”

“Hyunjin too” You added.

Felix’s gaze changed, and he nodded, “Right. Of course”

“Yeah”

He took a step back, smiling, “I guess I should let you get back to him"

Felix looked so happy, so much like his usual self, you felt safe again and you had to ask, “What did you…want to say to me? The other night, when you texted me?”

He laughed, except it seemed forced, “Um, forget that. I was just tipsy, and I was missing you”

You recalled his texts, “No, you said you realised why you’d been acting this way. What way?”

“Well…” He tucked his hands in his pockets, and stepped even closer. Under the lanterns, his eyes sparkled in a way they hadn’t before. Was it because it had been weeks since you’d seen him this happy, or was it just that you’d never gone so long without him?

“I yelled at you, at the cabin, at the party. The one you organised, just for me”

“I remember”

He sighed, “I’m sorry about that. It was…uncalled for, and I was an asshole, for doing that to you, when all you’d been doing was trying to make sure I had a good night”

“Why are you apologising to me now? All of a sudden?”

He shrugged, “I’ve been wanting to for a while. I just couldn’t find the right time, and then earlier this week, I was actually thinking about us. About the cabin, and-”

“Felix…”

“Do you remember that summer?” He interrupted, and even though you’d spent every summer the same way, you somehow knew exactly which one he was talking about.

The summer Hana and Yeonjun started dating.

The same summer you promised Felix you’d never let anything get in between you.

How did he know that you were thinking of it too?

Was it because you and him had spent your entire lives around each other, and he knew you so well?

“Yeah. I remember” You nodded, “What about it?”

“I miss that. I’m really sorry for getting frustrated at you, and overwhelmed. I was upset because-"

“Because you what?"

He shook his head, “It wasn’t just because of Hyunjin”

“Then what?”

He sighed, “That’s not important. What matters is…I’ve been thinking about that summer a lot, and how it was probably the best one of my life. We snuck out to Jeju, do you remember that?”

“I do. Your parents got so mad”

“They did” He laughed, “Anyway, so I was thinking…we could go for a swim soon, right?”

“Why?”

He smiled, “It’s the season of the fireflies. Don’t you remember?”

Your heart crumbled at the memories. 

You and Felix used to go there, every summer, to play with the lightning bugs.

Was it you that ruined everything? 

Felix tilt his head at you, “You all right, Y/N?”

You swallowed, because it was time to tell him what you’d been feeling, “No. I…keep thinking about how things used to be, and I miss that”

His gaze softened, “You do?”

You had to be honest now, “Do you think too much has happened…that things can never be the way they were?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean…Hana and Yeonjun will probably never talk to each other again, half of it feels like my fault”

He shook his head, insisting, “It’s not your fault. They just weren’t meant to be together”

“You believe that?”

“Yeah. When two people are meant to be, everything in the world brings them closer, not further apart”

“And…what about you and Yeonjun?”

He shrugged, a playful expression on his face, “Maybe…we can be friends again”

“Really?”

“I…honestly don’t even remember what I was mad at him for. For breaking up with her, for leaving us, it doesn’t matter”

“And…Hyunjin?”

His eyes shot up to yours, “What about Hyunjin?”

You swallowed, “You and him…do you think you can ever be friends with him again?”

He shrugged, “Does it matter? He’s…going to move back to the city, and I’m probably never going to see him again”

“Why?”

“I mean…with his job, it’s not like he’s going to be visiting every summer. So I don’t think it matters if me and Hyunjin get along or not. We’ll hardly ever meet”

You nodded, the sting of Hyunjin leaving hitting you again, but then something Minho had told you came back to you, “Can I ask you something?”

“Yeah, you can”

“When we were fifteen, you said you’d look for the boy from the shop, but you…never told me you found him. Why did you never tell me?”

Felix’s gaze fell to the floor, “It was..futile. It would just break your heart, Y/N”

“What do you mean?”

He stepped closer, clearly wanting to explain himself, and his voice was louder now, because the movie was beginning to play, “I didn’t want to give you false hope. When I found out who Hyunjin is, I also found out what he was doing…training in some big-shot company that would basically own his DNA if he debuted. And he did debut”

“So?”

“So…there would have been no point if you even knew his name, Y/N. I didn’t want you to get hurt. I thought I was doing what was best for you. I’m sorry I lied”

Your gaze fell to the floor, because of course he made some kind of sense, it’s not like Felix was an evil person who would keep such things from you for no reason. He cared about you, and so he did what he could to protect you, even if it was wrong, “So is Eunbi your girlfriend now?”

“Where would you get that idea?”

“Seonmi told me everything”

Felix laughed, “Seonmi told you what she thinks she knows. We’re just sleeping together”

“Right. I should go-”

He stepped up to you, closing the distance between you, “You asked me if things can go back to the way they were”

“Yeah?”

“Why do you want that so badly?”

You frowned, “What…what do you mean?”

“I mean…Hana was a bitch to you ever since Yeonjun left her. You wanna go back to that?”

Your eyes narrowed, “That’s not what I meant”

“Then what did you mean? Do you even know what you want go back to?”

“Of course I know, Lix”

“No, I think you like hurting yourself. Why are you always chasing after things you can’t have? Like that art internship in the city. Like…him”

Your eyes widened, and you stepped back, sneakers skidding against the dirt,  “How…how do you know about that?”

He sighed, “Is that really the most important thing right now?”

You squeezed your eyes shut, “I was here to fix things, not to fight again”

Felix let out a breath, reaching out to grab your hand, but you stepped back.

“We’re just having a conversation, Y/N, I’m sorry if it makes you feel like I’m fighting you. Trust me, the last thing I want to do is to fight you”

“Then what are you even saying?” You mumbled, “Why don’t you want things to go back to the way they were? Don’t you want us to be friends again, Yongbok?”

“No, I don’t, Y/N”

“What?” Your eyes shot to his, because you hadn’t expected him to say that, “You…don’t wanna be friends with me anymore?”

His gaze fell to the floor, and he seemed nervous, until he looked back up at you, “I don’t think this is the best place for this conversation”

“No, Yongbok, if you’re cutting me out of your life-”

His eyes landed on someone behind you, “I’m sorry. I can’t have this conversation with you right now. I’ll see you later”

“What...?” You watched him walk away, heart sinking.

“Before you say anything, I tried my best!” Hyunjin laughed, and you turned around. He stood with Yeonjun, snacks in hand, smiling wide. 

“Tried your best on what?” You asked, a lump in your throat after that entire conversation.

“There were way too many candies at the stall. I didn’t even know there’s that many flavours of gummy bears” Hyunjin noted, and then extended a packet towards you, “So I got you guys a mix of them”

“Oh...thank you” You fought a smile, following them back to the truck. Yuqi had spread out all of the blankets, to make enough space for the four of you in the back.

“That’s perfect” Yuqi reached out, taking the pack of candy from Hyunjin, “A gummy bear orgy is just what we need”

“Gross” Yeonjun sniffled, climbing into the truck, crawling over to get comfortable.

You grabbed the tub of popcorn, balancing it on your lap so Hyunjin could hop into the back too. He slid in next to you, pressing you to the side, and you pulled the blanket over yourselves. 

“Are you comfortable?” He glanced at you, leaning into your ear to talk because the movie had already began.

“Yeah” You manoeuvred your legs over his, entangling them. His arm wrapped around your shoulders, pulling you closer, and it was easier to forgot about the conversation with Felix with his arms around you.

He smiled, dimples appearing, “Warm enough?”

“Yeah” You smiled, not wanting to ruin yet another night, “Don’t worry about it”

“The movie’s starting guys, save the pillow talk for later!” Yuqi whisper-yelled, leaning over to look at you.

“Okay, okay” You laughed, bringing your knees up to your chest, letting yourself get comfortable.

“Is the opening scary?” Hyunjin whispered in your ear to not disturb the others.

“A bit”

“Man” He mumbled, sinking deeper into the blanket, and it was cute how he tried to make himself smaller, “I’m definitely going to embarrass myself tonight”

“Why?” You laughed.

“I might scream” He mumbled, as onscreen a girl went out for a late night swim, while her boyfriend stayed on the beach. You, of course, knew what was coming next. 

“You can hold my hand, if it makes you feel better” You told Hyunjin, and he glanced at you, wondering if you were being serious.

“Are you making fun of me already?” He narrowed his eyes at you.

“Of course not” You smiled, reaching over to grab his hand, pulling it into your lap. 

“Is the shark gonna come now?” Hyunjin tensed up, as the music in the movie got louder, and he squint his eyes, preparing himself for a jump-scare. 

He squeezed the life out of your hand when the shark attached the girl. You watched with bated breath, as people in the drive-in theater started cheering, making you laugh. He was focused on the film with unparalleled focus, even though he pretended he hated it.

“You’re so fucking cute” You blurted, already feeling so much better, mid-way through the movie.

He looked at you, eyes still narrowed, “You’re enjoying my misery”

You laughed, “I am, but only because you look adorable” 

He pouted, eyes wide, “Why did I want to do this again?”

“Because you’re the sweetest boy in the world” You hummed, wanting nothing more than to kiss him, but you couldn’t, not here. Instead, you settled for staring at his plush lips.

It seemed like he was thinking of the same thing, because his gaze dropped to your lips, and he mumbled, “Y/N…We can’t. Not here…”

You were in public, surrounded by tons of families, and Hyunjin couldn’t engage in PDA like this, ever. After everything that was happening with Chan and Jisung, he couldn’t risk anything of this sort.

“Sorry” You bit your lip, moving back.

His eyes were half-lidded as he stared at you, “It’s fine. We just…have to be careful about this”

This. He acknowledged it, and that made you happier than you thought it would.

It wasn’t just mistakes, or built-up tension, or lust that had pulled you two together.

It was purposeful.

And you had to be careful about it now.

You felt lost in his daze, “Can I come over after this?”

“Actually. Could I come to your place instead?”

“Oh, of course”

“My place is just a mess” He laughed.

“I don’t really care. We can still go—”

“Let’s just meet at yours” He insisted.

“Of course” You settled back, a little confused.

You tried to focus on the movie, and you almost did, for a good five minutes before Hyunjin spoke up again, “It’s not that I don’t want—”

“Can you pass me the pop soda, Hyunjin? This fucking kernel is stuck in my throat, and it feels like I'm deepthro-” 

“Yuqi!” You interrupted her, “Why would you put that image in my head?”

She laughed “Just give me the soda, please”

Hyunjin blinked, looking back at her, “Shit. We… forgot to get that”

Her eyes widened, disappointing flashing through, “Oh. That’s okay. I’ll just go get some”

She stood up, the truck creaking under the sudden weight.

Hyunjin sat up too, pushing the blanket off himself, inviting cold air onto your legs, “No, that’s okay. I’m the one who forgot. You’ll miss the movie”

She shook her head, “I’ve seen it before. I’ll come with you, I’m already up” 

Hyunjin shot you a smile, “See you in a bit”

You nodded, watching them walk off, hurrying towards the food stands, so they didn’t interrupt the other cars' views.

Yeonjun bit into the leftovers popcorn, shifting closer to you, “More for us”

“You’re right” You laughed, reaching into the tub to eat some.

“Are you having a good time?” He asked.

You smiled, “Yeah. I am. How are you feeling now?”

“Yuqi’s a good distraction” He laughed, “She’s been taking care of me”

“She’s amazing”

“Can I ask why we’re here?”

“What do you mean?”

He laughed, gesturing to the drive-in theater, “I mean, you haven’t come here in ages, and then Hyunjin bugs us about doing a movie night literally the next day…even though he clearly hates the movie playing”

You stretched your feet out, “Yeah. We’re…checking off a list”

“A list?”

“Of stuff I love about Daejon. He thinks it’ll help me feel better”

“I don’t understand why you two don’t just…date” He laughed.

“It’s impossible, Jun” You bit your lip, “Especially right now”

“Yeah. I know” Yeonjun spoke, “Did he tell you what happened with Jisung? There’s going to be some big lawsuit, I heard, against the company”

“What?” Your head snapped to his, “Did he tell you that?”

“Some of my friends at work were discussing it, when I was on the video call earlier. Hyunjin didn’t tell you?”

“No…he didn’t mention that”

Yeonjun sighed, “It’s probably really shitty for him, to watch his friend go through that”

“I can’t even imagine what Jisung would be feeling” You stared at the screen, zoning out of the movie already, even though it was gearing up towards some of the iconic scenes.

“What’s taking them so long?” He wondered, “They’re missing the best parts”

You glanced around, but you couldn’t spot them anywhere, “They must be on their way. Are you missing your emotional support Yuqi?”

He rolled his eyes, “As if you aren’t missing your emotional support Hyunjin”

You laughed, “I can go check. Maybe they’re picking gummy bears again”

You made your way through the cars, as the movie continued playing in the background. 

Yuqi was walking back to you, soda in her hands. Why was she alone?

You looked around the parking lot, but you couldn’t see him anywhere.

“Hey” She shot you a smile, meeting you in the middle, “I finally got it out of my throat. Man that was so uncomfortable”

You laughed, “You...are so entertaining”

“I know” She grinned, grabbing your arm to lead you to the truck, “Come on, let’s go. I miss my dumbass brother”

“But where’s Hyunjin?” You asked, stopping her.

Yuqi sipped the soda, “Oh, he was right behind me. I’m sure he’s on his way”

“But the two of you went together. Is everything okay?

She glanced at you, but her voice was too cheerful to be authentic, “Of course. Why wouldn’t it be? I'm sure he’s fine”

Why did it feel like she was hiding something from you?

You narrowed your eyes, “Yuqi...tell me the truth, please”

She sighed, “He said he’ll join us in a minute. He told me to go back to the truck! Why would I question him?”

“You go back to the truck. I’ll go wait for Hyunjin” You dropped your arm from her grip, walking back over to the food stands. 

“Wait!” Yuqi made a noise resembling a grumble, and ran after you.

What if he got a call from the city, what if he wasn’t okay?

He wouldn’t just walk out of the movie like that.

The noise of the film carried across the entire area, and it was so loud now, the music swelling and escalating as the film geared towards another jump-scare. 

Frightful and excited cheers echoed through the parking lot, and your heart was pounding, from the bass of the speakers, and from the fear of not seeing him anywhere.

Where could he have gone?

You turned the corner from the dumpling stall, looking over towards the restrooms but the line stretched long, and he wasn’t there either.

You turned around to her, “Did he seem okay?”

Yuqi was cursing, wiping her shirt, “Fuck, I spilled my soda!”

You stepped forward, voice softening, “I’ll get us tissues on the way back, but Yuqi...was Hyunjin oka-”

Then you heard him.

Towards the exit, under the huge drive-in sign, were two silhouettes.

Hyunjin and Yongbok.

You were so far away, but you could see that they were in a heated discussion, of some kind.

“Do you know what that’s about?” You asked her, a lump rising in your throat.

Her eyes were wide, and she shook her head, “No, but Hyunjin told me—”

“They’re arguing...”

“Y/N, let’s just go back” Yuqi spoke, pulling at your arm.

You’d never seen Hyunjin like this. He seemed so overwhelmed, hand over his face as Yongbok talked to him about something.

You pulled your arm away from her grip, walking over to them, and they were so engrossed that they didn’t even notice you coming.

“When the hell are you gonna tell her?” Yongbok was saying, “After you were already gone-?”

“Yongbok” Hyunjin mumbled, breathing into his hands, “Please... try to understand”

He grit his teeth, “I don’t have to understand shit, Hyunjin” 

“What is going on?” You asked, but your voice came out shaky and you thought you’d cry. 

What the hell were they talking about?

You felt sick to the stomach, as they turned to you, like they’d been caught...

Hyunjin’s eyes widened, “Y/N”

You stepped closer, footsteps steady despite the absolute storm brewing inside your heart, “Tell me what...? Is everything okay, Hyunjin?”

Hyunjin looked defeated, as he stepped over to you, “I need to talk to you”

»»————-

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[kimaixun]

[Curse of Bad Lucks] - [SKZ!Felix X M!Reader]

"You were a wonderful experience."

"You were everything."

M/N could only smile bitterly as he turn on his heel, walking away from none other than, Lee YongBok, Felix, who is now, officially, his once upon a time the love of his life. It was finally done. He had finally ended it. It hurts. He could literally feel everything shattering apart. M/N sucked in a deep breath, painfully, as he sat on the bench, looking towards the well lit panaromic view of Jeju.

Felix was just a wonderful experience.

Meanwhile, Felix fell on his knees as he watches M/N walk away from him. M/N had ended things with him and he knew he was in disbelieve. 18 years, 18 fucking years that they had been together, gone, just like that. They were married for god sake and they have a child. A 4 years old little boy that they raised together. How could M/N do this to him? Where had it gone wrong?

M/N was everything.

18 years ago.....

"See that barista? He is hot." Lee YongBok whispered to his close friend, Hwang Hyunjin.

Hwang Hyunjin peeks over his shoulder seeing the (H/C) tall lad. He looked young and Felix was right, he is hot, "he is good looking."

"I'm going to hit on him." Felix made his way to the counter, stopping in front of the (H/C). "Hi!"

"Hi," Felix could feel his breath hitched when M/N looked up and his (E/C) looked into his. M/N is gorgeous, "i...let...let me get my colleague. My korean is still not good."

"Oh no, it's fine. I'm australian so, you can speak english to me."

M/N flashes him a gentle smile, "thank you. How can i help you for the day?"

Felix fished out his phone, "i want to bring you out on a date so, if i could, can i get your number?" He giggles when M/N's eyes widened, evidently taken aback by the sudden confession. "You are really cute and i could get myself a boyfriend anytime soon. Life doesn't seem to get any younger, you know."

"I...Wait...you..." M/N jumbled on his words, "why?"

"What?"

"Why me?" M/N abruptly stopped in the midst of cleaning the counter and walked in front of Felix. It was Felix turn to be taken aback at how different their height difference was. M/N was two feet taller than him. "Why me? I...I'm just a barista. I have sugar in my pockets and coffee stains on my socks. I am cursed with bad lucks. I am poor. I am stupid and worthless and i am very sure that i'll ruin your life. Like i said i'm cursed with bad lucks. I'm cursed so, if you are an angel in disguise, please, run for your life."

"You are so dark and twisty." Felix said, "What if i'm a devil in disguise? Do i still need to run for my life too?"

M/N chuckled, "usually, the conversation stops there and i have no replies for what you've just asked."

"Well since you dont know what would a devil in disguise do, why not give it a try first?" Felix convinced. "I'll bring you out on dates, we can get to know each other. It doesnt have to be expensive or anything. I'm not so high maintenance and it's very easy to make me happy. I appreciate the small little things. You can get me a cup of coffee and i will grin for the entire day, i will....."

"Okay." M/N cut him off, giving him a gentle smile, "My name is F/N M/N and can i make you a cup of coffee? It's on me."

"Okay M/N," Felix said, "My name is Lee YongBok, Felix and i would like to accept your coffee offer."

15 years ago.....

"So, want to tell me how you ended up all soaked and smelly?" Felix grimaced as he turns the water on to fill the tub.

"There was a cat." M/N simply replied as he stripped off his clothes, entering the tub and submerged himself into the water, "a black cat and i should have known better that black cats are almost like a combo to my cursed life."

Felix giggled as he massages M/N's hair with the lavender scented shampoo, "let me guess. You probably saved the cat from a drain and you slipped and fall into it."

"Has this hapened before?"

"Twice." Felix replied. "but, hey. On the bright side, you aren't hurt this time. You came home the last two times with broken arms and legs. This time, you're just, smelly."

M/N couldnt help but, grin so widely that his cheeks start to hurt, "i guess my dark and twisty life is coming to a turn with my very own sunshine by my side. I love you."

"I love you so much more." Felix smiles and pecks M/N on the lips.

10 years ago.....

"I DID IT! WE DID IT!" M/N couldn't contain his excitement as he barged into the house. Felix who was folding their clothes on the couch was taken aback when M/N lounge himself onto him, knocking them off the couch and down to the floor. "I can finally open my own cafe with my very own saving and it's just a block away from here!"

"OMG! LOVE! I am so proud of you!" Felix exclaimed. They were both on the floor, Felix on top of the younger who hugged him tightly as they laid on the ground. "I'm so fucking proud of you!"

Prior to where they were, 7 years ago, M/N had told his boyfriend his life plans and Felix supported him unconditionally. It had been rough for both of them. M/N was almost working 18 hours a day to earn the money he needed and Felix had to focus on the upcoming of Stray Kids. The amount they spent together could be easily counted by fingers. Within a month, they could only meet for a day where M/N finally took the day off and so did Felix. Despite that, they made it through each day for the entire 7 years, promising themselves that once they reached their goal, they will live a life that they desired.

"I'm so happy. Thank you, thank you, thank you Lee YongBok." M/N buried his face into Felix's neck.

Felix smiles and embrace the other tightly, "We did it love. I got something to tell you too. I will be leaving the music industry."

"Wait, what?! You love music, you love your fans, you love STRAY KIDS. Please, you don't have to do it for me." M/N jolted up.

"I do. I do love all of them but, i love you the most. I'm not doing this for you. I am doing this for me. It's time for me to slow down. I'm not getting any younger now and, i want to retire. I want to be the boyfriend who will sit in the cafe and stare at his boyfriend all day long and make sure no one is flirting with him," Felix chuckled, "I will be like those typical managers who pretend to be busy on their phones but in reality I'm just watching as the world goes by."

"Marry me, Lee Yongbok." M/N confessed. "I...I dont have a ring right now but, will you marry me? I will make you the happiest man alive. I will bring breakfast to our bed every morning. I will bring you out on dates. I will be the richest some day soon that we can stay home all day with each other in our cozy apartment. I will give you the..."

M/N was cut off when Felix slammed their lips together and as if the time froze, they kissed passionately not caring the world existed.

"Yes, Yes. I will marry you."

5 years ago.....

"Hi love."

"Sunshine, you're here!" M/N grinned as he puts down the cloth he used to wipe the counter, heading towards Felix with an open arm. Felix jumped into his husband's arms and greeted him with a kiss. "How did your day go?"

"Wonderful." Felix pecks his cheeks and they settled down at the corner of the cafe, reserved specially just for them, "I met Lee Know Hyung and Jisung Hyung. Their baby have grown so big. He's a big boy now. He can put his own pants and put his plate in the sink."

"Awww, that's great." M/N cooed. "So, while we are at the topic, i was wondering if you would want to have a baby with me."

Felix giggled, "oh love. I wish i could bear your children but, we aren't exactly living in a ABO universe."

"I mean with the amount of me breeding into you, we could've get 10 kids now." M/N winked.

"EWWWWW BOSS! The cafe isn't exactly empty!" yelled an employee of his.

"You're suppose to be working, not eavedropping." M/N laughed when he sees Felix red face. "Sunshine, i really mean what i said. We could get a surrogate or we coul--"

"Yes!" Felix answered, "Let's have a kid together."

"I love you." M/N kissed his husband.

"I love you so much more."

4 years ago.....

"Sunshine?" M/N whispered as he pokes his head into their bedroom.

"Hi love. Come in." Felix beckoned, "I just got him down."

M/N tiptoes across the room and slide under the covers beside Felix, "I am so sorry i had to ditch you halfway."

"Hey, don't be sorry love." Felix shifted as little as possible to face his husband, "we weren't expecting the cafe to catch on fire. How's the employees?"

"No one was injured, thankfully and they are doing an investigation on the cause of fire." M/N explained as he tugs his head onto his husband's chest, cuddling closely to inhale the oh-so-familiar calming scent of his husband.

"Thank goodness. How about you, love? Are you okay?"

M/N sighed inaudibly, "I....I'm scared. Sunshine, i'm terrified."

"Hey, you're okay. You're okay." Felix assures planting kisses to the crown of M/N's head as he caresses his hair tenderly. "You're okay love."

"It's just," M/N took a deep breath, "it's as if the curse of bad lucks are latching on me again and i'm so terrified that it'll hurt you and Woojin. I'll never forgive myself if any of you are hurt."

"Hey, don't be so dark and twisty." Felix chuckled, "i know love. I get where you are coming from but, let's not jump into conclusion okay? Maybe it was just a coincidence."

"I...I don't know." Felix could feel tears drenching his shirt.

"You're okay baby. You're okay." Felix shushes as he embrace his husband tighter. "We're here for you. Woojin and i will always be by your side no matter what curse you have, okay?"

"I love you." M/N sniffed.

"I love you so much more."

2 years ago.....

"F/N M/N. Which bed is he in?" Felix could feel the anxiety crept into him as he barge through the doors of the emergency department. Woojin who was cradled in his arms could sense his parent anxiousness and he squirms uncomfortably.

"I'm sorry and you are?" The nurse asked.

"F/N YongBok. I'm his husband. Please, tell me where he is." Felix pleaded.

"Oh, he's in bed 10 sir. Right this way." The nurse showed the way.

Felix couldn't help the tears streaming down his cheek as he rushed over to the said bed.

"Mama cry no." Little Woojin frowned, his lips jutting out. "Mama no cry."

"I'm sorry baby." Felix kissed his forehead. He knew he shouldn't be crying but, he couldn't help it. He needed to make sure M/N is fine first.

"Sunshine?"

It wasn't a lie when people said that legs can turn into jelly. If it wasn't the doctor who attended to M/N that catch him, he would've landed on the floor, probably hitting his head at the corner of the hospital bed.

"I'm okay sunshine. I'm okay. I promise." M/N repeated as he took Felix and Woojin into his arms. "I'm okay sunshine. I'm okay baby."

"Papa ouchie."

M/N chuckled as he took Woojin in his arms, "yes, papa ouchie. Small ouchie."

"Papa. Mama cry papa ouchie." Little Woojin pouted.

"I'm sorry. Papa no ouchie, mama no cry okay?" M/N assured as he slides his hand around Felix's waist. "Sunshine? I promise you, i'm okay."

"Seventh time. It's the seventh time you had to come to the ER this year. You end up with so many injuries all the time. You said you were just going to get cereal and i end up getting a call from the ER that you were hit with a baseball bat? I swear, i am going to lock you in our house and we will never leave the house ever again." Felix cried as he leaned onto his husband's shoulder, "i'm locking you up in the house."

"Okay sunshine. I'll be happily locked with you and Woojin."

"I love you."

"I love you so much more."

9 hour ago.....

"Have fun Mama! Papa!" Woojin waved at his parents before running back into his Uncle Lee Know and Uncle Jisung's hotel room to play with their son.

"Thank you for watching him." Felix said to the couple in front of them.

The two family were on their vacation in Jeju Island and since M/N and Felix had watched over MinSung yesterday whilst the parents were on their date, it was M/N and Felix's turn today.

"Oh, don't sweat about it. You guys have fun! Now, go. The night is still young." Jisung kicked them out.

M/N and Felix spent the rest of the day living their life like they were teenagers all over again. They went to the theme park followed by an ice cream stall and then a dinner reservation. They were just living their dream life fully.

"Sunshine?" M/N softly calls out as they walk through the quiet street of Jeju, hands intertwined, on their way back to their hotel.

"Yes, love?"

"If one day i am not around, can you promise me some things?"

Felix stopped on his track, "is that a way of you telling me that you are getting old?"

M/N chuckled, "maybe. I am being serious though. Can you please promise me some things?" Felix was not going to lie but, an uncomfortable churn in his stomach begin to arise.

"Yes love. Anything."

M/N took both of his hands in his reminding Felix of the time when they took their vow the exact same way right now or the night when M/N had proposed to him. M/N always held his hands when he needed to talk about important things taht could mean life or death.

"Sunshine, when i am gone, i want you to promise me that you will get over me within 7 days. I want you to promise me that you will forget about me thoroughly. I want you to move on with your life. I want you to inherit all my inheritance. I want you to raise Woojin with the strength of your sunshine heart. I want you to stay strong. I want you to make sure you and Woojin eat proper meals, always celebrate birthdays and occasions no matter how busy you are. I want Woojin to inherit my business. Woojin will grow up wonderfully. I want you to promise me to love yourself unconditionally. Please, promise me that." M/N took Felix's hand to his lips and tenderly kissed it. "I love you so much. I love you so fucking much."

"You.....you are scaring me. Is everything okay?"

"Sunshine, please. Promise me that." M/N pleaded.

"No, i can't suddenly promise you as if you will be gone in another 5 minutes. I can't just lie to myself to make a promise that i will get over you in 7 days. I spend half my life loving you and never regretted it ever in my life. You can't expect me to just forget you just like that! We are married and we have a kid!" Felix took a deep breath, calming himself down, "love, tell me, what's wrong?"

"I am divorcing you. I am done with you. The lawyers will send in the papers in a week and tonight will be last time you see me."

"But, why?"

Felix heartbreak is grief that comes in waves, gruelling. It is a shard in his guts that stabbed him over and over again. It feels like death just the same as bereavement and in that quiet second, it chokes the breath from his body and short circuitshis mind. What was once whole is shattered; where once was peace is emptiness, echoes of a love he put his everything into.

"You were a wonderful experience."

"You were everything."

Present.....

Ring....Ring....Ring

"I did everything you told me to." M/N spat into the answered phone.

"You did great honey."

"and as you promised, don't even lay a finger on them. if you hurt my sunshine and my child, I WILL KILL YOU, Hwang Hyunjin." M/N growled.

He could hear Hyunjin's sinister laugh in echoing through the phone, "i promised honey. I'm sending someone over to get you now. I'll see you in a couple of hours."

The call ended and M/N slams his phone to the ground, breaking it into pieces. AFterall, his life was still a curse of bad lucks. M/N couldn't help but cried his heart out, screaming in despair.

[writingpei]

wicked games - lee minho

pairing: lee minho x f!reader genre: academic rivals to lovers cw: curse words, parental abuse and neglect, unhealthy relationship with studying, bullying, minho is a dick sometimes summary: park y/n thinks lee minho is an idiot (regardless of how many 100% scores he scored on countless tests, how many of his papers were praised by professors, and how many ugly academic olympic trophies he won), but she can't quite remember who she was before he came along to be the bane of her fucking existence. when the two go head-to-head for a scholarship to her dream college, all hell breaks loose at haneul high school. ⋘ 𝑙𝑜𝑎𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑎… ⋙

￫ chapter one: destiny works in mysterious ways (wc: 4.3k)

↳ eventful timeline of terror that marked unpleasant but fundamental moments for the comprehension of the relationship between y/n and minho, its apex in the current moment in which the story takes place, the unpredictable senior year of high school

￫ chapter two: off to the races (wc: 3k)

↳ the proposal of a scholarship won through a competition is rubbed in the students' faces by the school and park y/n and lee minho can't be expected not to fly at each other's throats in the process of trying to win over one another

￫ chapter three: hit you harder (wc: 4.5k)

↳ being forced to pair up with minho in the chem lab makes for an unpleasant start to y/n's morning, but the strange blonde boy who awaits her at his knees at the end of the class makes an interesting turn of events

￫ chapter four: rumour has it (wc: 4k)

↳ rumors between y/n and hyunjin fly loose through the halls of haneul high school, and when they reach minho's ears, who knows what it might do to him

￫ chapter five: roses are fine, but i like the harder stuff (wc: 3.2k)

↳ how could minho prefer anything his money could buy over the blind hatred she felt for him?

￫ chapter six: color me green (wc: 2.6k)

↳ when school's valentine's day arrives, very little can spoil minho's good mood, especially when he finally finds out who the hwang hyunjin guy is… not that he cares anyway

￫ chapter seven: action and reaction (wc: 2.1k)

↳ when the stars start to drip from the sky, minho sees himself having to do the thing he hates the most in the world: go home

￫ chapter eight: i'll be your mirror (wc: 2.6k)

↳ triggered by the weight of his home, minho runs to the one who is always there for him; a deep dive into the friendship between him and yongbok

￫ chapter nine: welcome to the jungle (wc: 2.7k)

↳ the running for school's student council president is happening, which can only mean one thing... they want to kill each other (again)

￫ chapter ten: detention (wc: 2k)

↳ minho did something bad, but his name not being said on stage and the round of applause not being meant for him makes it all worth it

￫ chapter eleven: savior complex (wc: 2.4k)

↳ "the way to hell is paved with good intentions", but does that saying extend to the complexion of hwang hyunjin or does it stop only for him?

￫ chapter twelve: i'm looking through you (wc: 2.5k)

↳ yongbok started to plant a seed inside minho's head to try and make him realize what his feelings really mean, but he's almost figuring it out on his own

￫ chapter thirteen: feels like we only go backwards (wc: 3.5k)

↳ the hostility between minho and y/n is too much to bear even by the people around them, that’s why throwing them in a small room and locking them up together seemed like a good idea at a first glance

￫ chapter fourteen: i still don’t know where everything went (wc: 5.2k)

↳ something is going on inside minho but he can’t quite put his finger on it. the school’s basketball game, however, can only make his confusion worse

[soap143]

hii can you do any member of your choice with the doll game? it was so cute i loved it!!

i accidentally sent this ask to @leeknowstan33 sry😭

I’ve been looking forward to this request for a while now. Ahhh, I loved writing “Hiding” so much, so this is a part 2 of that fic. Enjoy!

•• ━━━━━━━•• ❖ •• ━━━━━━━ ••

Taglist: @makebelieveyouregoodenough @hearts444innie111 @skznccmlee @jeonginsdiary

Prompts: none

Words: 2.2 k

•• ━━━━━━━•• ❖ •• ━━━━━━━ ••

Hiding pt. 2

lee!felix

ler!minho and hyunjin

•• ━━━━━━━•• ❖ •• ━━━━━━━ ••

In just a mere second, Hyunjin swung that same door open. The younger's breath hitched as he clenched his bag to his chest, which was rapidly rising up and down.

He couldn't be caught listening to whatever happened in that practice room. Especially after he supposedly left about 20 minutes ago…

He peeked over the wall, looking to see if the taller had gone yet. But what he heard next made him freeze.

"Hmm.. I wonder if Felix got home safe. I should call." Hyunjin quickly mumbled under his breath.

Shit, had he turned his sound off? Too scared to shuffle around his pockets, Yongbok just begged to the lords above he had.

To his dismay, the sunshine felt a vibration in the pocket of his jacket and soon his ringtone echoed along the empty hallways of the building.

Felix felt his heart drumming in his ribcage, threatening to explode any moment now.

This has to be one of the most embarrassing situations in his life…

The older's footsteps only got louder the longer he waited, and before the shorter could even think of just bolting down the hall, he was grabbed by two firm hands.

"Do you have any idea how much you scared me, Yongbok!" Hyunjin dramatically gasped, giggling off his fear a few moments later.

"I-I'm sorry, hyung. You scared me too! Why the hell did you even call?!" A much more relaxed Felix laughed aswell, shoving at the older's shoulder.

"Me?! Why are you here anyway?" Hyune raised a brow, strengthening his grip to not let the aussie slip away.

"I uh- I was actually going to- no wait, I can explain!" Felix stuttered, reddening up.

“Alright, I’ve heard enough, come with me now…” Hyunjin smirked, swinging the blonde over his shoulder.

Lix yelped, punching the dancer’s firm back “Let go, stupid! Please!”

Hyunjin just ignored the younger’s pleads, walking back to the practice room, where an exhausted Minho layed slumped down in the middle of the floor.

“Wake up, hyung. Looks like someone was trying to be sneaky and listen to your little tickle session~” Jinnie teased, lightly squeezing Felix’s back thighs.

“Nohoho I wasn’t! H-He’s making things up!” the freckled boy whined, still wiggling around and slapping Hyunjin’s back.

Minho stood up with a mischievous smile on his face, as the taller safely put the squirming boy down.

Lix immediately tried to bolt out that room, only to be caught by Lee Know’s iron grip. He snatched the younger and pulled him back into his arms.

“You’re not going anywhere now~” The cat lover teased, as Felix did everything in his power to get out.

“P-please let go! You’re both crazy!” Yongbok grunted.

“Nuh-uh! Should’ve gone home straight away without being a sneaky little shit.” Hyunjin stated with a smirk on his face.

Felix started twisting around in Minho’s arms when both of the future ler’s looked into each other's eyes and nodded as if they had been planning this attack for a long time.

The oldest of the three quickly kicked Lix’s back knees, forcing him to get down on the ground. Lee Know and Hyune both cooperated in pinning the wriggling boy down.

Felix was doing everything to not let both of his hyung’s make him completely defenseless. He was screaming, grunting, biting and whatnot. But the two attackers just smiled at his weak flee attempts.

Soon, the youngest was fully pinned to the ground. Minho was sitting on the palms of his hands while Hyunjin situated himself on Lix’s lower thighs.

“You know what’s about to happen, right? And you want it, sooo bad. I just know~” Jinnie teased, resting his hands on the victims' sides.

Felix just closed his eyes, pressing his lips into a thin line to hide his smile. He couldn’t hide his madly blushing face though…

“Oh, so you’re playing hard to get. Minho hyung, let’s show him what we do best.” said the taller.

Lee Know bringed his hands down to meet Yongbook’s armpits. The younger harshly flinched and twisted his body to the side.

“N-no you can’t do it! Don’t touch me!” Felix yelled, preparing himself to hold back any noises he will be making.

“Oh yeah? Make me.” Minho smirked, scratching at the sensitive skin.

Lix just smiled and wiggled around. He took a deep breath in and out, trying to calm himself down.

“Wow, he’s trying so hard. Too bad he’s too ticklish to handle any of the things that are about to come…” Hyunjin sighed, wrapping his fingers around the blonde’s slender waist.

Felix realised he was doomed. Might as well just give up now…

The two older men looked at eachother and nodded. Lee Know pressed his thumbs into the shorter’s ticklish hollows and Hyunjin slowly massaged over his sides.

“N-nohohoho plehehehease! You’re hohohorrible!” Yongbok immediately broke out giggling.

“I can’t tell if my hands are really big or if your waist is really small!” teased Hyunjin, vibrating his fingers a little quicker.

Felix just laughed even louder, tugging at his hands and trying to hide his blushing face.

“Juhuhust let go of meHEHEHEHE! STOP!” the youngest squealed when Minho started scribbling his fingers all over his armpits.

The two older men just giggled at Lix’s hilarious reaction and tickled even harder. Which made the sunshine boy go crazy.

“PLEHEHEHEHEHEASE PLEASE, HAHAHAHA LET ME HAVE A BREHEHEAK!! YOU GUYS ARE BRUTAL!” Felix roared out.

Both dancer’s slowed down their attack, just resting their hands on the previously wrecked spots.

“I think it’s time for a fun little game~” Lee Know taunted, getting closer to Yongbok’s face and blowing air into his ears.

“Nohoho I don’t wanna play anythihihing! That’s unfair!” Felix grunted, twisting his head away from the ticklish sensation in his ears.

“Did we ask? Lay down right now! Minho hyung will show you what you’re gonna have to do, I’m sure he has experience.” the tallest smirked at the cat man, whom was reddening up by the second.

“R-Right so this game is called “Doll”. You’ll have to stay completely still as we change up your positions as much as we like. You cannot move, or else…“ Lee Know quickly explained, glaring the shorter soon after.

“Whatever! Let’s just get this over with…” Felix grumbled out.

The youngest of the three layed down on his back, crossing his arms over his chest. To be honest, Minho and Hyunjin were surprised he didn’t jump up to his feet and ran away as soon as they let him go.

Felix was also just as surprised. But he pushed the thought that maybe he could want this just a tiny little bit away and focused on not boiling alive from the big, hot blush spreading over his face.

“Alright, so I think we can start now. Oh my god Lee Know hyung look at this new doll I bought just for you! You should totally play with it right now~” the tallest called out.

“Ooh, yes, I love dolls! You’re amazing, Hyunjin! Let’s see, can I move this doll’s arm here?” Minho said, grabbing one of Lix’s wrists and pulling them above his head.

“Or here?” he repeated, grabbing a different limb this time and pulling it to the side of his body.

“And what about here?” the dancer teasingly questioned gripping the younger’s ankles to separate his legs.

“Wow, this doll can move around a lot huh? I think we should turn his head to the side now.” Hyunjin suggested, gently pushing Lixie’s face towards the floor.

I can’t move or see anything, they’re cruel!

Thought Felix. They were really gonna push him to his limits…

The two elder’s were having the time of their lives, giggling their heads off at their bandmate’s red face and pained expression. He definitely knew what was coming.

Lix felt his limbs being shuffled around: his arms went up, down, to his sides and everywhere they could, his legs were being folded in and out, lifted up and down. He really felt like they were playing around with him like some stupid doll…

“Look at this button, hyung! I wonder what it does.” said Hyunjin in surprise.

Felix was about to lift his own head up to see what button his bandmates had found, when he felt a sudden poke on his side.

Poke, poke, poke, poke.

Lixie could barely hold his giggles in. Hyunjin was really getting into his overly ticklish flesh with those pokes.

“I think I found some more buttons!” Minho announced as well, attacking the youngest’s other side with harsh pokes too.

“Hehehehe nohohoho please!” Felix let a few stifled giggles out.

“The doll is speaking, the doll is speaking! Now let’s get him, I think this doll is haunted.” the tallest screeched, sitting on poor Lixie’s hips to hold him in place.

“BAHAHAHAHA I AM NOT A DOLL, LEHEHET ME- UGH, GO! WHAT DID I DOHOHO!” the shorter howled at the very top of his lungs, slapping and swatting at Hyunjin’s long stupid fingers.

“Oh this doll fights, too. Minho, hold his hands now.” the dancer sassily ordered, still vibrating his fingers all over Felix’s firm torso.

“P-PLEHEHEHEASE THIS IS NOT FAHAHAIR!” the chick yelled.

Lixie was bucking his hips up and down, squirming side to side and just doing anything to get Hyune off him. He tried to push himself up and even tickle Jin back, but was only met with a pair of hands being shoved into his hypersensitive underarms.

“YOU’RE FUCKING CRAZY! STOHOHOP IT RIGHT NOW, PLEHEASE!” the youngest dancer begged as Lee Know approached him from behind.

“You know what’s gonna happen now, right? That’s what you get for snooping around!” the cat lover hissed in anger. No way Felix was getting away after listening to his very private after-dance meeting with Hyunjin…

“Now, let’s see, are your ribs all in place? Are there any missing?” Hyunjin teasingly questioned, dragging his finger along the younger’s upper torso.

He suddenly grabbed one singular rib on each side and vibrated his fingers onto the bones.

“H-HYUNJIN, HYUHUNG LEHEHET GO NOW! PLEHEHEASE!” the youngest howled, twisting around.

But Hyunjin wouldn’t budge, simply moving his fingers to another rib, and to another and so on, until Felix was just a ticklish mess.

“There is no way ribs can be that ticklish!” the taller giggled at the chick’s hilarious reactions.

“Oh plehease, as if you aren’t ten times more sensi-TIHIHIHIVE HAHAHAHA DON’T TOUCH ME! QUIT IHIHIHIT!” Felix attempted to bite back, only to get taken right back down by a few fingers being shoved into his collarbone-neck area.

“This kind of language is unacceptable! Minho-hyung, you’re doing anything, get his legs. A little birdie told me he’s ticklish there as well~” Hyunjin chirped out, grabbing Lix’s wrists and bringing them to his chest.

Without saying much, Lee Know sat on the blonde haired man’s lower thighs. It was his worst spot, too, so he knew how to get it just right.

“I bet he’s enjoying this so much, he hasn’t said a word yet!” the oldest teases, giving Felix’s right thigh a light squeeze.

“AHH, I’m just tihihihired! Don’t touch my legs…” Felix breathed out after a rather aggressive flinch.

“Oh please, you said you were tired during practice as well, but somehow mustered up some energy to snoop around. I bet you can do it again.” Lee Know angrily stated. He was not letting that slide.

Lix gulped. With Hyunjin holding his upper body in place, he knew how much more ticklish everything would feel.

Minho poked one thigh, then the other and squeezed both of them at the time.

“GAHH plehehease!” Felix scrambled around. Well, tried to. Moving around was basically impossible in Hyune’s iron grip anyway.

The cat lover lightly grazed the shorter’s inner thigh, gently pinching the sensitive skin. Felix closed his eyes with a big, sunny smile on his face. He knew what was coming.

Lee Know knew this was a death spot. He had to work quickly and effectively, or else poor Felix might actually die.

So, he wrapped his arms around the aussie’s inner leg and just started vibrating his fingers into the hypersensitive flesh.

Felix jumped. Quite literally ascended. He never even knew thighs could be this ticklish.

“HAHAHAHA PLEHEHEHEASE MINHOHOHO NOHOHOHO PLEHEHEASE LEHEHET GOHOHO!” He screamed.

With every single ounce of strength left in his body, he grabbed his hands out of Hyunjin’s now more loose grip, bucked Minho right off himself and ran to the furthest corner of the dance room.

“N-nehehever do that again in your life. You guys literally almost lost me!” Felix dramatically stated, gulping big breaths of air in and out.

“Oh yeah? Well you should’ve been better at hiding then!” the tallest pointed out.

“You’re not fooling anyone now, we know you totally loved that~” Minho tormented, crossing his arms over his chest.

Felix let out one more frustrated scream (totally completely not avoiding Lee Knows very flustering sentence which was totally completely not true), and stormed right out of the practice room, swinging his bag over his back.

He is definitely not snooping around next time, or is he?

•• ━━━━━━━•• ❖ •• ━━━━━━━ ••

I honestly missed this smm❤️☹️ I’m so glad to perhaps confirm I’m back in my active era😍 I’ve been very busy BUT i will try to post more this month bc of tickletober and stuff. Hope you enjoyed❤️

[im-tops-bottom]

Interviewer: So how fast did you fall in love with Changbin?

Felix: Oh it was love at first sight

Hyunjin: Oh It WaS lOvE aT fIrSt SiGhT

Interviewer: Who do you like in SKZ Hyunjin and how long did it take you to like them?

Hyunjin: oh when I first heard we were going to have Felix in our group, I already knew he was mine before even meeting him

Changbin, glares: which is funny because he's been dating me since we first met

Hyunjin, drops to the ground to beg Felix: PLEASE GIVE ME A CHANCE!

Minho, glares at Changbin: You know what's funny? People saying things like that as if THEY'RE the ones dating MY Yongbok

Changbin, calms down immediately looking at Minho:

Chan, stares at everything that's happening while playing with something in his pocket:

Chan, thinking to himself: Should I do it? Should I do it?

Han: excuse me Minho but he ain't yours

Seungmin: He doesn't belong to any of you

Jeongin: in fact he belongs to me

Everyone, stares at Jeongin:

Jeongin: Jokes?

Chan, thinking again: ah fuck it I'm gonna do it

Chan: FELIX!

Felix, looks up in surprise: Yes hyung?

Chan, shoves Hyunjin off to the side ignoring his yelping as he gets on one knee and pulls out the item he was playing with:

Chan: Felix will you marry me?

Felix, gasps: How did I go from single to married already?? :O I'm living the best y/n life . Omg does that mean there's gonna be a Jackson Wang party?? Oh my god yes Chris I'll marry you

Chan, smiles as he puts the ring on: Thank you Lixie

Chan, shoves Changbin off his seat ignoring his yelp as he drags the seat right next to Felix so he can wrap an arm around him:

Felix, preens: I'm getting married

Every other member in SKZ glares at Chan thinking of ways to get rid of him:

Chan, gulps as he can feel everyones glares directed to him but can't help feeling proud because he did the one thing he wanted to do since meeting Felix:

[v--143]

could I request a fic with lee jeongin and lers lee know and felix? maybe one where jeongin drops honorifics on purpose and felix and lee know have to playfully punish him for it?

OOOOO This is such a cute prompt thank you 🥹🥹 hope you enjoy!!

< Honorifics >

[Lee! Jeongin]

[Ler! Felix + Minho]

———————————————————————————

“Take the step a little bit faster, move your leg lightly but quicker”

“Like, just putting less umph into it?” Jeongin questioned Lee Know.

“Yea exactly” Lee Know replied.

“Make it seem natural and flow with the choreo” Felix added.

Lee Know, Felix, and Jeongin were all in the JYP practice room. Lino and Felix, being part of Danceracha, took it upon themselves to help their maknae out on some steps to choreo he was struggling on. It wasn’t many, but they wanted to help out anyway. He kept getting stuck on the ITEM choreography where they had to jump up and swing their legs backwards.

“It’s so quick!” Jeongin said as he failed to swing his leg back in time again.

“It is, but it’s possible!” Lee Know said, “Just keep swinging your leg over and over, eventually it’ll become much more natural.”

“It’s almost like you’re kicking in a circle except your foot hits the floor halfway through” Felix said.

Jeongin kept going at it. Swinging his leg in the air a few times, kicking at the air and landing midway through, anything to make himself feel lighter and move his legs quicker. After some time, Lee Know played the music again and IN successfully did the kick.

“I DID IT! I think, did I?” He yelled as he sweatily landed on the floor from the choreo move.

“You did” Lee Know said looking proud.

Felix went over to IN and high fived him on the floor as Lee Know went to sit down.

“See IN, I told you all you needed was practice. That’s what all this is about. The more time and effort you put into this stuff, the better the outcome will be, no matter not hopeless you may feel. Life can get like that-“

“Okay okay I didn’t ask for a lecture” IN said giggling.

“IN, listen to me it’s important”

“Oooooooo okay sir”

“…What’d you just say?” Lee Know said while looking over at a surprised Felix.

“Sir?!” Felix said to IN, shocked.

“I might as well call you sir with all the lecturing you give me too, Mr. Yongbok” IN teased.

Felix’s jaw dropped to the floor as Lee Know got up from his chair and walked over to IN who was laying stomach down on the floor. IN laughed nervously as Lino approached with a smirk.

“You called me sir?! What am I an old man to you?” He said, smiling at the younger’s anticipating face.

“With your wiseness anyone would think so” IN snarkily replied.

Lee Know’s own jaw dropped as he motioned for Felix to sit in front of IN. He did as told and grabbed at both IN’s wrists before he could get up and run, holding them taut on the floor in front of his head.

“Whahat are you doing” IN asked, “I’m nohot very flexible so be careful!” he snapped at them through giggles.

Lino was straddling IN’s waist and began to massage his back, going from hitting it lightly to digging his thumbs in at the top. At first, it actually felt good.

“You just need to relaaaax and breeeathe deep breaths Ayenie” Lino said.

“What are you doing and what are you planni-”

IN was cut off as Lino shaped his fingers to claws and began to scribble at his sides.

“NohOAHAHA HYUHAHANG”

Lino smiled and began to wiggle all the way up to his underarms and back down to his hips all along his sides while making cute baby noises the entire way”

“Oooooo IN’s so cuuteaaah~”

“STOHOP HAHEHAHAHA” IN laughed. He was writhing from side to side and trying to get his wrists out of Felix’s grip to bring his arms down, but couldn’t.

Felix began giggling and sat on the back of IN’s still stretched out hands with his knees. While Lino focused on his lower sides, Felix began going at his neck and poking at his underarms every now and then.

“Ooooo Ayenieee~ you’re so squirmy today” Felix cooed while lightly wiggling his fingers into IN’s neck.

“NAHAHA! STOHOP- STOP PLEHAHA” IN pleaded to deaf ears. His high pitched laugh had them both melting.

Lino and Felix were both cooing at their maknae and how he was wiggling around violently on the floor. He clearly couldn’t take much.

“Aww you can’t take it can you” Lino asked while he latched onto his ribs and dug in.

“AAAAAHHHA HAHAH AHANOOOO” IN screamed in an attempt to arch his back.

“PLEHEHEASE I- I CAHAHA- I CANT TAHAHAKE IT”

“NO NO NO NOOAHA N- NO NOOAHHA DON’T!”

IN had tears coming out of his eyes as his head continuously shook from side to side. When Lino began to tickle at his lower back and sides, that’s when he fell into silent laughter and couldn’t even hear himself think.

“Is your neck broken too” Felix said as he poked around IN’s ears and neck. He could only twitch now, too exhausted to even try to avoid his evil fingers.

“You’re so sensitive~ now, what did we learn from this?” Lino asked a red faced IN as he stopped his attack.

After a few deep breaths, he was able to respond.

“I won’t call you any more names, sir” IN choked out of pure pettiness.

Felix’s jaw dropped again and Lino stared at IN wide eyed.

“You asked for it.”

Lino turned himself around and began scribbling behind IN’s knees and squeezing at his thighs. This went on for minutes, and IN’s screams and punches at the floor probably could’ve been heard throughout the entire JYP building.

Felix got distracted at one point and IN was able to roll out of Lino’s straddled grip, getting up as fast as he could and running outside of the practice room with Lino and Lix hot on his tail. Once he opened the door though and other people were outside, they were all forced to smile and wave without causing a ruckus.

Lino and Lix looked at IN mischievously from inside the practice room while he stood a few feet away from the door. Lino simply pointed at his eyes with two fingers and shot them back at IN. Felix smiled and wiggled his fingers in his direction.

IN, still out of breath and red faced, smiled nervously and made his way to the bathroom. He didn’t want to think about what would happen the moment he stepped out.

———————————————————————————

AHHHHH I can’t help but end it on a sort of cliffhanger every time because I loooove when others do that and I get to continue it in my head.

Like maybe IN exit the bathroom and Lino+Lix dragged him into a cleaning supplies closet and wrecked him there, but they were all forced to stay quiet since more people were right outside the door.

Or maybe IN fell asleep from exhaustion in the bathroom and had to go home late, only to find out that everyone except Lino+Lix had left the building and they ran through the whole thing chasing each other.

WHOOO knows 🤷🏻‍♀️🤭 HOPE YOU ENJOYEDDD

[bandgie]

All For You | Armageddon Event

Request: Charity | Seo Changbin & Lee Yongbok (SKZ) by anon song!

warnings! MDNI18+, fem!reader, pussy eating, mxm themes, 3some, double penetration (brief) boobs/nipple play, hair pulling (m!), brief handjob, cum eating (brief)

1.9k words

Dinner is still hot. The smell of cooked meat and kimchi infiltrates your nose. It should make your stomach growl and your mouth salivate. Yet, the reason for your hunger and drooling is not because of dinner at all. It’s the two men, your two lovers, that draw such reactions from you.

It’s quite a juxtaposition to see blonde hair and black hair side-by-side. The tops of their head move concurrently between your legs. You can feel how their tongue mingle and mix while suckling on your clit. Their lips smack and kiss over every inch of your cunt. It makes you arch off the couch just slightly.

“Mmm, just like that.” You intertwine your fingers in their hair. The men hum, vibrating your clit almost like a toy. You let a whimper, bucking your hips from the sensation before their hands grip each hip, putting you back down on the couch.

Felix’s lower half is soaked. You can see how it glistens when he pulls away, letting Changbin take your pussy whole in his mouth. “Just lay still for us.” His deep voice sends shivers throughout your body. “We’ll get you there. There’s no rush.”

You don’t argue with him, nodding obediently. 

Now with more access to you, Changbin doesn’t hold back in sucking you between his lips. He takes your clit into his mouth eagerly, bobbing his head just the slightest while his tongue laps over you.

You can feel how their hold strengthens on your ass as if you might try and grind into the air again, but you manage to keep yourself planted onto the cushions while Changbin pulls on your bundle of nerves.

Instead, you twitch. Your thighs tremble and you tug much harder on Changbin’s hair. 

He lets out a yelp. The pull caused him to pop off your cunt with a wet sound. His unfocused eyes finally settle on you and you babble to apologies. “I-I’m sorry. Did I hurt you? I’m sorry, Binnie. It just felt so good and-”

He smiles, his wet chin shining proudly. “It’s okay, bubba. It didn’t hurt, I promise. You can pull as much as you like if it makes you feel better.” 

Felix giggles, runnung his hand through Changbin’s curly hair and looking at him fondly. 

“You’re so cool, hyung.”

Now Changbin blushes, his lips turning downward into his signature shy smile. “Come help your cool hyung eat this pretty pussy, Yongbok.” Felix chuckles again, adjusting his knees until he’s beside Changbin. You watch his pink tongue push through his lips, but just before he gets a lick in, his warm eyes lock with yours.

“Do you want both of us to taste you, baby?” Felix's small fingers kneed your inner thigh. “Is this what you want?”

You’ll take anything they give you and more. Changbin’s plush lips already feel so good on you, his tongue swiping down to collect your arousal and smear it on your clit. It would be hard to get him to share, you think. Changbin likes eating diligently and eagerly licking his plate clean. He’d make some room for Felix if you asked, but you’re quite content with one mouth on your cunt.

Even then, you don’t want to deter Felix from what he wants to do either. “What do you want, Lixie?”

The groan Changbin lets out in your folds matches Felix’s. “Nuh-uh, don’t do that. Tonight’s about you. Not me or Changbin. It’s okay to tell us what you want.”

Tonight has been all about you. The now-cold dinner is your favorite. The homemade brownies in the oven are for you. Since you woke up, your boyfriends have been more doting than ever. Just because, they told you when you asked why.

Just because.

You feel like you don’t deserve them in the slightest, but as Felix patiently waits for your answer while kissing up and down your thigh, you feel like you belong.

The shirt is already ridden up just below the curve of your breasts, but you pull up the material even more to expose your bare chest. You move your hands to grope the flesh of your tits, pushing them together and pinching your nipples between your fingers.

“C-can you kiss me here?” Despite them seeing you naked countless times, you can’t help the stuttering. And despite those amount of times, Felix’s eyes still widen and Changbin sucks a little harder at the sight of your boobs.

Felix is next to you in a flash. His hips press against your own while he curls his legs on the couch. One hand holds your breast and the other wraps behind your back to bring you closer. 

“Of course, baby.” Felix leans his head and brushes his lips against your bud. “I can kiss you anywhere.”

You hum appreciatively, placing your hands down into their hair. Felix is always tender with you, opting to press chaste kisses to your breasts. He focuses everywhere but your hardened nipple. The warmth of his mouth makes you buck into Changbin’s who happily widens his jaw. 

Felix sucks just above the curve of your breast, turning the skin a pretty pink before it will inevitably darken to a purple hue. The way his tongue laps over your skin has you mewling. A soft sound that makes Felix suck a little harder.

Then he kisses down, down until he finally catches your bud between his lips. With circular movements of his head, Felix runs it over his soft lips. It feels so good, so gentle that you feel yourself gush in Changbin’s mouth.

Your strong lover greedily moans. The wet sound of your cunt and mouth mingling is almost as loud as your whimpers. Felix gets the cue to take your nipple in his mouth, opening his jaw to try and fit your breast in his mouth. 

And when he sucks in correspondence with Changbin, your eyes roll back. Your hips can’t stay planted on the couch anymore that your orgasm builds. Changbin’s head moves with you, keeping his mouth stuck where he belongs.

“F-fuck!” You pull on Felix’s long hair. “Making me feel so good.”

You can feel how Felix smiles against your skin. Hear how Changbin whines affectionately.

Pulling on Felix’s hair suddenly doesn’t feel like enough. You trail your hand lower until you catch his erection underneath his sweats.

“Mmm. So hard.” You palm him, feeling how his tongue swirling on your nipple stutters from your ministrations. He releases your bud and places a kiss on the hickey forming.

“You don’t have to do that.” Felix uses a hand to gently push yours away. “We want to focus on you.”

“But-but you’re so hard. You’re both so hard.” Even if you can’t see Changbin’s lower half, you know he’s humping the bottom of the couch from how his body jolts and shudders. “I want to.”

This catches their attention. Even Changbin, who could mostly likely cum from your taste alone, raises an eyebrow and hesitantly pulls from your cunt. “Want to what?

Rather than telling them, you show them. Your shaky fingers leave their hair and go between your legs.

Looping your arms underneath your thighs, you spread your folds indecently. Slick and spit oozes from your cunt and Changbin licks his lips like he’s about to get another taste for himself, but your whining stops him.

“Inside. I wanna feel you inside.” Your hips buck from the thought of them filling you up. “I wanna cum with you deep in here.”

Changbin’s already nodding, standing up to chuck his shorts down, but Felix smoothes a hand down, rubbing over your cunt.

“You’re not just saying that because you feel bad, right?”

“No!” Gosh, you feel like you could cum just from Felix’s little palm over you. “I want to feel you. I need to feel you. Just fuck me.”

His adam’s apple bobs and he nods. He shrugs his joggers off too, putting them in a pile with Changbin’s who’s already stroking himself.

“Who do you want first, baby?” Changbin huffs. “Tell me.”

Shit. You don't want to choose. “Both! I don’t care how. Just please fuck me already.”

It’s quick how they move you. Changbin has the strength to be under you, holding your thighs apart with his cock just under your ass. It throbs being so close to your entrance, waiting for Felix to place one knee on the couch in front of you and bend just slightly so his tip aligns with you.

They’ve done this before, but not often, and most definitely not in the living room. Still, they couldn’t say no to your desperation. That aroused look in your eyes only intensifies as Changbin uses a hand to grip the base of his cock and find your opening.

“Shiiit.” You moan when his head sinks in. Changbin’s girth spreads you in the first intrusion and Felix has a front-row seat as to how your pussy caves for him.

Changbin breathes in your neck, pressing deeper until his chubby cock fits snug. Your walls pulse around him, cream leaking onto his balls. Felix’s eyes lock on the white substance, reaching a hand down to collect the slick.

You watch with hazy eyes and an open mouth as Felix shoves his fingers between your lips. You happily taste the substance, moaning at the musky flavor of yourself and Changbin. Felix presses his digits deep much like Changbin’s cock, pressing against your tongue to feel your tongue swirl around him.

“Fuck, baby.” Felix moans. “You’re so fucking hot.”

A string of saliva connects you to him even as Felix pulls his fingers away. You grin at him seductively.

“And tight.” Changbin groans in the shell of your ear. “Get in here, Yongbok. She’s waiting.”

It feels like you could finish from just pure excitement. Changbin doesn’t need to thrust. You could cockwarm him while Felix watches. Their presence is enough to feel undeniable pleasure.

That exhilaration multiples when Felix strokes himself. He nods to Changbin’s words, mouth moving to agree, but you can’t hear. So much blood is rushing to your head that you feel faint. Your heartbeat pulses in your ear and all you can hear is its increased rhythm as Felix’s tip touches your clit.

He drags it down, meeting Changbin’s few inches that stick out. He gives you a look. One of caution, trust, and love. 

“Please.”

He sinks in. Your lovers don’t have much length, but their cocks have enough girth to make up for it and more. It feels like you’re being clawed with pleasure, searing your insides with heat. Changbin moans in your ear when Felix presses deeper. Your cunt seeps with more arousal, accommodating the unbelievable stretch.

Changbin widens your thighs to add more room, to let Felix keep going in so his pelvis is flush against your cli-

Beep! Beep! Beep!

The sound of the alarm rings throughout the house. Felix jumps and Changbin holds you tighter as if the sound is threatening. It takes you a second to register that the beeping is coming from the kitchen. 

“What the fu-”

“Ughhh, fuck. The brownies.” Felix grumbles. His grip on your thighs adjusts like he’s about to pull out. You feel his inches slowly slip about before you reach your arms forward and bring him close.

“No! Just leave them.”

“Leave them in the oven?”

“Yongbok.” Changbin’s strangled voice breaks through. “I’m balls deep. You were about to be balls deep. The brownies can wait. They need to cool down anyway.”

Felix’s flushed face turns confused. “How can they cool down in the oven if-”

“Felix!” “Yongbok-ah!”

“Sorry.”

[minminyoonjii]

Stray Love Haven Day 28 : [Bang Chan/Lee Felix/Fem! Reader/Lee Minho/Seo Changbin]

🔗https://archiveofourown.org/works/42120486

💗Series Masterlist

🌹CW Daddy Dom Little Girl|Orgasm Control|Descriptive Anxiety Attack|Headspaces|Domestic Setting|Oral Fixation|Non-Sexual Bath Scene|Fluff Galore|Aftercare 💛AN This is a follow-up to the previous day. I highly recommend reading that day to get the whole picture but if you don't wish to that's valid. Enjoy your stay. 💌 This is a work of fiction, I by all means don't force ship anyone. They have the right to love whomever they want.

🍄Wordcount: 1.7K

"Take a seat, little one," Chan said, tapping his thigh. You pursed your lips, sitting on his lap "Where are the others?" you questioned, taking his hand into yours. Felix hummed, "Out, they had things to settle," he said, handing you a glass of water. "So it's only us?" you asked, seeing Minho and Changbin sit across from you. Changbin nodded, "You probably know why you're here right?" he asked, leaning forward.

You fidgeted with Chan's fingers "I think so," you mumbled, feeling intimidated under their gaze. "Relax little one. You didn't do anything wrong, in fact, we were the ones who fucked up," Chan said, pulling you closer to his chest. You furrowed your eyebrows "What do you mean?" you asked, noticing that they averted their gaze. Minho sighed, "Princess, we may have conditioned you into orgasm control," he explained.

You bounced your knee, letting Minho's words sink in "You're not going to use it against me are you?" you whispered, anxiety building gradually. Changbin shook his head "Never," he said firmly, breaking you out of your daze. You bit your tongue, shuddering "How did it happen?" you asked, turning your gaze to Felix. He pursed his lips "I don't want to trigger it, sweetheart," he said, frowning.

You clenched your jaw, "Just say it, Lee Yongbok," you gritted, hand reaching up your neck. "Don't," Chan growled, keeping your hands down. You sniffled, whimpering "I have to know," you cried, squirming out of his hold. Chan rocked your body "Breathe, little one," he soothed, slowing his breath so you could match. Your lips wobbled, taking deep and slow breaths "There's my sweet girl," he whispered.

"Okay, okay," you sighed, hands trembling against Chan's. You shuddered, wiping your tears away "Please, I'm giving you vivid consent Pixie, please," you whispered. Felix looked at his hyungs, questioning if he should comply. Chan nodded, "She'll be alright," he reassured, letting both you and Felix know that you were safe. Felix nodded back "I'm going to count you down. At least that way it wouldn't be abrupt," he explained, keeping eye contact with you.

You nodded, mentally bracing yourself "Alright," you whispered, tightening your hold around Chan's hand. "One," Felix started, watching your every reaction. The others in the room did the same, adrenaline pumping in their veins. "Three," he continues, steadily counting up to ten. You gulped, focusing on Felix's voice. "Six," he said, knowing he was more than halfway there. Your vision was dazed, blankly zoning into Felix's smooth tone.

"Nine," Felix said, hearing his heartbeat pound within his eardrums. "Ten," he growled, keeping the tension high. "Cum for us, sweetheart," he commanded. You gasped, breath hitching "Fuck," you whimpered, body convulsing as you came. Your pussy contracted around nothing, but your orgasm was still intense. Your thighs quivered, sending shockwaves through your nerves. Chan rubbed your sides, bringing you down from your high "Good girl," he praised.

You shivered, panties sopping wet with slick. "Are you with us, sweetheart?" Felix asked, staring at you with worry. You nodded, curling into Chan's hold "Yeah," you said, still catching your breath. Chan hummed, looking at you "We will never use that command on you unless you give us consent too," he said, brushing your hair from your face. You nodded, tucking your face into the crook of his neck "I trust you all but that was horrific," you whispered, gripping Chan's shirt.

He nodded, rocking your body once more "Thank you for trusting us. You're one of us now. We're going to give you the same respect and love we give each other, little one," he said, kissing your forehead. You sniffled, curling into Chan's chest. Minho walked towards you "Princess, can we get a hug too?" he asked, rubbing your back. Chan chuckled, "Go on, little one. Give our boys some TLC too," he said, sitting up.

You whined but settled when Minho coddled you on his lap "Our sweet princess," he cooed, booping your nose. You wrinkled your nose, licking your lips as you eyed Minho's hand. "I know that look," Minho chuckled, bringing his fingers to your lips "Open up," he said, slipping his fingers into your mouth. You preened, sucking on Minho's fingers. Felix squealed, holding back his urge to squish your cheeks as you nibbled on the pads of Minho's palm.

Changbin chuckled, rubbing your thighs "Precious little one has a teething problem like our boys," he said, tickling your sides. You whined, glaring at Changbin "No tickles, daddy," you huffed, sinking your teeth back into Minho's hand. Chan chuckled, taking a hair tie "Sit up baby, your hair is getting everywhere," he said, combing through your tangled hair. You whimpered whenever Chan tugged too hard, causing him to apologize and pamper kisses all over your face.

Felix went up to his room, "Ah, ha!" he cheered, holding an unopened teething toy. "Look what I got," he said, handing you the toy after he rinsed it. You released Minho's hand and sunk your teeth into the silicone. Minho chuckled, looking at his thoroughly nipped hand "People are going to question the random hickeys on my hand," he said, noticing the small purplish-red spots blooming under his skin. Changbin snorted, "Just say you got a new kitten with an oral fixation," he teased.

You squinted your eyes, feeling drowsy from the warm atmosphere. Chan noticed, pulling you back in his lap "Don't sleep yet, little one. You still need to wash up and have lunch," he chuckled, seeing your eyes struggle to open. Felix cupped your cheeks "I picked out your clothes and the tub is running. Stay awake a bit longer, sweetheart," he chuckled, making your lips pucker within his hold. Changbin stood up stretching, "Hyung, let's make lunch while they get ready," he said, pulling Minho to his feet.

Minho groaned, "I hate it," he whined but followed nonetheless. Felix opened Chan's door, "Be careful not to drop her, hyung," he teased, seeing Chan struggle a bit to lift you up the stairs. Chan rolled his eyes, "Oh shut up, mate," he scoffed, reaching his room. Felix cackled, slumping onto Chan's bed as he laughed. Chan sighed, shaking his head "I think there's a bath bomb in my room that I haven't used yet. Do you want it in your tub?" he asked, helping you out of the shorts Jeongin helped you in.

You nodded, teether latched between your teeth. Felix cooed "Arms up, sweetie," he said, removing the hoodie. You shivered, feeling the warmth strip away from your body. Chan chuckled, holding the bath bomb in hand "Look darling, it's a wolf. Do you think there's a toy in it?" he asked, lifting you up to the tub. You perked up, "Toy?" you asked, seeing the water fizz into multiple colours. Felix cooed, "That's right, maybe you'd get a toy. Who knows," he said, pouring water over your shoulders.

You held the melting fizzy mush in your hands, hoping there would be a toy within it. Chan gasped, "What's that, little one?" he asked, taking the black bag floating to the surface. You watched as Chan opened the bag, waiting eagerly to see what was inside. "A wolf bath toy," he said, placing it in your hands. You giggled around the teether, placing the wolf in the water. Felix found your expression absolutely endearing.

"Appa, look," you slurred, making waves so that the toy would sway. Chan cooed, patting your head "That's so cool, little one," he said, engaging in your enthusiasm. Felix pondered, observing your behaviour "Hyung do you think she has some sort of headspace?" he whispered, not wanting to break you out of your trance. Chan hummed, looking back at you "Perhaps," he said, chuckling as a bubble popped on your face.

You whined, tasting the bitter suds on your tongue when it popped "Papa," you huffed. Chan raised an eyebrow "I think that's you, Pixie," he said. Felix pointed to himself, "Me?" he questioned. You pointed to Felix "Papa," you said, squeaking the bath toy in your hand. Felix's mouth gaped "She's calling for you, Pixie," Chan teased, preparing the towels needed. Felix closed his mouth, paying his attention to you "What's wrong, sweetheart?" he asked.

"Soap got in my mouth," you slurred, sticking out your tongue. Felix took a glass of clean water "Gurgle this and spit it out, sweetie," he said, helping you out of the tub. You nodded, following as told "Good job," Chan praised, wrapping the towels around you. Felix chuckled, setting the glass aside "Her clothes are on your bed, hyung," he said. Chan hummed, "Let's get you dressed, yeah?" he smiled, dressing you up.

Minho knocked on the door "Can we come in?" he asked, holding a tray of food. Felix opened Chan's door "Is that food for us too?" he asked, giving Minho his doe eyes. Minho glared at him, not bothering to answer his question as he walked in. Changbin chuckled, seeing Felix's stunned expression "We made enough for all of us, Pixie," he said, setting his tray next to Minho's. You rubbed your eyes, sleep catching up to you once more.

"Just a bit more, princess," Minho cooed, feeding you a spoonful of bibimbap. You whined, chewing on the food languidly. Changbin nudged Chan's shoulder "Look at her," he whispered. Chan looked down, seeing your cheeks puff up with rice as you chewed. Felix snapped a few pictures but accidentally turned his flash on, waking you up. You grumbled, sitting straight to swallow the food "I think it's time you take a nap, little one," Changbin cooed, helping you take a sip of water.

Chan tucked you under his sheets, placing his wolf plush within your arms "Sweet dreams, baby girl," he whispered. You fell asleep shortly after, soft snores muffled against the blankets. "They should be home by now," Felix said, checking the time. Minho hummed, setting the empty bowls on the tray "There are leftovers if they ever get hungry," he said, leaning into Changbin's arms. "Our little family feels whole," Chan said, taking another bite of his bibimbap. Changbin chuckled, seeing Chan's ears tint red "It sure does," he said, pulling Minho closer.

[northstories]

"Perhaps" 🐰/🐥

A requested minlix drabble for @case143-i-love-you

"Y-Yongbok-ah..."

Minho feels his voice shaking deep in his throat, a certain kind of quiver he always finds himself embarrassed about when it makes itself known.

Luckily for him, it doesn't happen often.

Unluckily for him, the one person able to coax it there, knows this.

"Yes, Minho-ssi?" Felix tilts his head, the very picture of innocence. Minho has to admit he was fooled as well, that first time Felix entered his dance class. He thought what everyone else seems to think, that his new student is a ray of sunshine, that bluebirds must dress him in the morning, that there isn't a bad bone in his body or hair on his head.

But this is only partly true.

How a ray of sunshine such as Lee Felix can be a devil creature at the same time, is beyond Minho's comprehension. All he knows is that he might be the teacher of this dance class, but Felix has been dancing circles around him in a spiral, bringing him closer and closer until Minho feels caged into a corner in the middle.

And he isn't sure he hates it, no matter how much that embarrasses him.

Even so, Minho tries to find the resolution he had mustered up to tell Felix what's what. Minho is his teacher. The kiss they shared a few weeks ago shouldn't have happened. The way Felix had stayed behind after class last week to get on his knees and drive Minho insane with his mouth around his cock was very inappropriate.

And the way it makes Minho feel when Felix looks at him this way... Is beyond sinful.

"I–" All the words Minho has prepared vanish when he actually finds himself alone with Felix in the studio. Everyone has filed out and the building is quiet. The late class often means Minho is the last to leave it even though there are several businesses in the lower levels.

And to his detriment, Felix interprets his hesitation as an invitation to come closer, which only makes his vocal difficulties worse.

"You?" he smirks, raising a wry eyebrow, teasing. 

"I think we should–" Minho is cut off when Felix’s hand nudges his own where it's hanging limply by his side. "T-talk about our, uhm, our relationship," he manages, though only barely because Felix takes his hand and leans in, ghosting a breath over his sticky, hot neck. 

"I'd like that," Felix purrs, a rumble in his chest that makes Minho's neck hairs stand on end. 

"You would?" 

"Yeah. I think it's about time we take it to the next level. You like me, I like you. It makes sense."

Minho shakes his head, flustered. "No, Yongbok-ah, that's not– That's the opposite of what I was gonna–" 

Felix pulls back from Minho's neck, but not far, on the contrary his nose is hovering right in front of Minho's. So close Minho goes cross eyes looking at the dainty freckles smattered across his face. 

"You don't like me?" Felix tilts his head again. 

"I didn't say that," Minho admits, he doesn't have the heart to deny that for some reason. "But this,” he gestures between them lamely, “me being your teacher, taking money for you to attend my class... It's inappropriate."

There. He said it. Honestly, weaker men would have crumbled, Minho thinks. Perhaps he isn't as weak to Felix's charms as he thought. 

"So, I quit the class. Big deal," Felix shrugs. "I'd much rather have you in your spare time anyway. If you know what I mean?"

Fuck. Minho didn't prepare for this outcome. Didn't even think about it being a possibility.

"Oh."

"So, how about it? Let me take you out?" Felix’s thumb ghosts over the back of Minho’s hand, and just this simple gesture is enough to make his breath catch in his throat. "Or in, if that's what you're into." Felix winks, then wets his full bottom lip with a quick tongue. "Hm, yeah I think it is. You a top, Minho-ssi?"

"W-what?" Minho sputters, caught off guard by the brazen question.

Felix hums. "I knew it. You were a little too intrigued by the sight of me swallowing your cock not to be."

"Yah! Lee Yongbok, that's eno-"

"In fact, I was so sure, I made sure to be ready for it before I came here."

Minho's brain stops and then kickstarts back into action, and with it, the mental images slam into him. Felix thinking about him, prepping for him. Felix wanting Minho's cock inside of him, unafraid to say it.

He blinks at Felix with big eyes, stunned, shocked, though regrettably also chubbing up in his grey sweatpants. "You're crazy."

Felix grins and bumps their noses together. "Thanks." He hooks his fingers into the waistband of Minho's sweatpants and tugs teasingly. "You into it?"

Weaker men would have folded much sooner, Minho thinks. Perhaps he can still salvage some of his pride.

"Your place or mine?"

Oh well, there goes that theory.

Felix’s smile turns nothing short of feline when he steps closer, all the way in to nip at Minho's lip, to slot their mouths together too chastely for the arousal coursing through Minho’s body. "How about that couch over there?"

Lee Felix is a devil and is going to be the death of him.

"Fuck."

"Yes, Minho-ssi. That's what I wanna do. Good job."

Minho bristles, but he doesn't get to say something before Felix tugs him over by the grip on Minho's waistband and then pulls his sweatpants down. No mercy, no consideration for his modesty. "Yongbok-ah!"

Felix pushes him down to sit, a faux coy smile on his face. "Yes, Minho-ssi?" Then he pulls his t-shirt over his head, then discards his pants while Minho is busy following the train of freckles down his naked chest. "Second thoughts? Cold feet?"

Minho should probably say yes. At least if he wants to hold onto a single sliver of pride. But he doesn't. He places his hands on Felix’s waist eagerly when he climbs into his lap, and moans when Felix kisses him properly, grinding their naked cocks together.

"God, you're so pretty," Felix sighs into Minho's burning face, his blush so hot his ears are thrumming. "Been thinking about this so much."

"Mfgh," Minho jolts when one of Felix's hands slips into his hair, and the other reaches behind himself to wrap fingers around Minho’s cock. "You have?"

"Yeah! Fuck, yeah. Wondered what you'd feel like inside of me. What you'd look like on this couch while I ride you."

Minho is going to have an aneurysm as soon as the blood returns to his brain. He should thank his lucky stars that it’s busy making his cock throb, so that he may live a little while longer.

Felix tips his head back to lock eyes with him. "You want me?"

And fuck it, perhaps Minho can be a weak for one thing. Perhaps he can be weak when it's Felix, pretty, brave and brazen Felix who despite having rather small hands manages to wrap them completely around Minho's attention.

"Yes," he whispers, squeezing the meat of Felix’s sides for purchase. "Fine, yes I want you, okay? B-but I mean it, it's still inappropriate that– ah!"

Felix doesn't give him a chance to repeat himself fully before he's sinking down, his hole squeezing the head of Minho's cock so tightly it borders on painful. In other words; Perfect. They throw their heads back at the same time, groaning in tandem, letting the vibrations shake them free of any restraint they may have had. At least Minho knows he's had them.

"Yongbok-ah, fuck, yeah that's it."

"Yeah?" Felix smirks down at him, cat-like and with mischief sparkling in his eyes. "You like?"

This menace, as if it isn’t obvious Minho is barely hanging on by a thread already, and that it’s rapidly unraveling when Felix engages his thighs and works himself on Minho’s cock in a steady bounce. 

“Y-you don’t have to he be so– ah shit!– smug about it,” Minho pants, but it only makes Felix seem even more satisfied with himself. 

“But it’s so much more fun this way.” Minho’s hips buck from the steadily building pleasure pooling deep in his pelvis, ramming him into Felix harder, and catching him by surprise. “F-fuck, Minho-ssi, oh, that’s– Yes, do that again.” 

Minho grits his teeth against the wild urge to do as he’s told because his pride demands him to fight it. “Don’t tell me what to–” 

Felix cuts him off again. He’s got a knack for it, one that few people would make use of more than once because of the death glare it earns them. But not Felix, no, he has a hold on Minho and he knows it. Knows Minho’s weakness for his gravelly voice and angelic face, for his lithe body and rough hands. “Don’t pretend you don’t like it.” 

And then he yanks Minho’s head back by the hair, baring his throat to the mercy of Felix’s sharp teeth when he digs them into him. Hard enough to leave half-moon shaped little dents behind, and to make the skin bloom with purple-black.

“Ah, fuck! Y-you little shit, I ought to–” Minho tries to reprimand him, he really does, but his hips want to obey Felix and betray Minho completely. 

Felix laughs breathlessly. “Listen to you talking dirty to me. How unprofessional of you, teacher-nim. Very inappropriate.” He only grips Minho’s hair harder when he stops fucking up into him. Hard enough that Minho’s scalp screams and he gives in, goes on, lets his body take over and pounds up to meet Felix on every descent of his bounces. 

“Yes, yes, yes! Ah, good boy, Minho, that’s it, fuck.” Minho isn’t normally one for whimpering, but the intense pleasure leaves him unable to do a single thing to stop it when it hums to life in his throat and launches itself out of his mouth. “S-service top, huh? Like being good? I see,” Felix’s voice is affected too now, a fact that makes something in Minho’s chest preen with pride.

“I-I am good,” he quips, and there is that quiver again, the very same one, though so much more clear and loud. 

“Yes - you - are - oh!” Felix’s thighs must be screaming because they shake when he lifts himself up now, and Minho is so close he can’t see any other option than to just go for it. He will have to deal with the consequences later, because his present state of mind can’t even fathom what they will be. He slides his hands down to Felix’s ass, kneading a cheek in each of his palms, digging his fingers in while he lets Felix bounce one more time. One more. 

One more.

And then he tightens his grip. Arms locking against the sides of Felix’s body and tipping him forward, holding him perfectly positioned so Minho can fuck him with the whole force his thighs can muster. 

Felix’s keens, but somehow still manages to make Minho feel like he is helpless in this. Like he is playing right into Felix’s hands, doing what he wants even by taking over. The power doesn’t shift, doesn’t even budge. The only thing this does is sign Minho’s name on the dotted line of a contract he had no intention of being bound by. 

“Yongbok-ah, Y-Yong–b-bok, I–” He squeezes his eyes shut and has to fight the pulses of pleasure that keeps trying to push him over the edge, tries to focus on determining if Felix is close, if he’s right there with him. 

And perhaps Felix is a mind-reader too, because he groans into Minho’s neck, “Yeah, me too. You feel so good, hyung, so good for me. M’gonna come, I’m–” 

Minho moans embarrassingly loud when Felix’s teeth clamp down on his neck again, at the same time as his hole clenches, tight and fluttering as he comes in hot ropes, making a mess of Minho’s torso, t-shirt and sanity. 

He thinks it might be lost completely for a few moments, when his own release is ripped from him so hard his vision goes white, then black as his eyes roll back in his skull. All he knows for sure during those moments is that he feels good. Feels so, so good, and that Felix’s name is on his lips. 

The world comes back into focus slowly, but he still feels slow once it’s clear, from the heaviness that has settled in his body. It’s a process in itself to roll his head to the side to be able to look at Felix, who has his cheek pressed against Minho’s shoulder. Still smiling. Always, somehow, smiling. 

“What?” Minho manages, but Felix just lifts his head and shakes it.

“Just… You’re incredible,” he murmurs, leaning in to bump their noses together again, softly. “And I’m so serious, I wanna take you out real bad.” 

Minho’s ears burn and a wave of shyness washes over him, as if he wasn’t currently still sitting here with his cock inside of Felix’s ass. “Oh, uhm– I– You do, huh?” 

“Yep,” Felix makes an exaggerated popping sound and scrunches his nose when he smiles. And damn it, if it doesn’t make Minho’s heart do somersaults from excitement. 

Perhaps it’s trying to tell him he would like that too. 

Perhaps it’s been telling him this for a while, but he hasn’t wanted to hear it. 

“Perhaps that could be arranged.”

“Yeah?” 

“Yeah.” 

He doesn’t shy away from Felix’s gaze, joyful and triumphant. And perhaps Minho is a little too smitten to leave Felix hanging, and to not lean in and capture that plump bottom lip with his own, just to hear the hum of that voice that makes him quiver. 

In a good way. 

❤🐰/🐥❤

[jungkookslipring]

Giggles for Lixie

AHHHHHH I threw this together super fast if there’s spelling errors I’m sorry I just love our ticklish Yongbok and Ler!Hyunjinnie🥰

Lee! Felix

Ler! Hyunjin

Felix was situated on Hyunjin’s lap, with his hyungs arms wrapped around his middle. This thumb was rubbing over his toned abs as they were scrolling through Felix’s phone watching tik toks. One of Hyunjin’s hands slipped under Felix’s shirt and started rubbing comforting circles around his belly button. Felix twitched a couple times but Hyunjin’s warm hand was more soothing than ticklish. That comfort quickly turned when Hyunjin started lightly scratching Felix’s belly button. The younger one jumped as he shot a hand over Hyunjin’s hand.

“Jinniehehehehe,” Felix giggled as he tried to watch the tik tok on the screen.

“Yes Lixie?” Hyunjin asked sweetly in his ear as his other hand went under his shirt to squeeze his sides gently.

“Hehehehe whahahat are you d-doing hehehehehe,” Felix giggled as he tried to curl in on himself.

“Just tickling you,” Hyunjin said matter of factly. Felix blushed at the remark and continued wiggling in Hyunjin’s lap. He wasn’t going to stop hyunjin anytime soon, he honestly didn’t mind the attention. Hyunjin continued scratching around Felix’s bellybutton as the younger of the two filled the room with giggles. He dropped his phone and covered his face with both of his hands.

“Awww Lixie, where's your cute face?” Hyunjin asked as he used one hand to gently pry away Felix’s smaller hands. Felix scrunched his eyes and let his head fall back on Hyunjin’s shoulder, the tik tok long forgotten.

“There he is!! There’s my little giggle bug!” He cooed as he continued his actions on Felix’s belly button.

“Hyunjiniehehehehehe” Felix giggled as he crossed his arms over his chest, allowing more access for Hyunjin’s hands.

“Awww does Lixie love when I give him tickles?” Hyunjin cooed in Felix’s ear. Felix’s ears turned a deep shade of red as he nodded.

“You’re too cute I swear,” Hyunjin said as he took his index finger and started swirling it around the outside of his belly button. Felix’s giggles got louder.

“Hehehehahahaha pleahehehehease” Felix giggled bending his knees in attempt to cover his tummy. Hyunjin wrapped his legs around Felix’s waist, effectively holding them down.

“There’s no escaping my cute giggle bug!” Hyunjin teased as his fingers danced teasingly closer and closer to Felix’s belly button. Hyunjin reached the very edge of Felix’s belly button and stopped. Felix’s giggles ceased before he started giggling out of nervousness. Without warning, Hyunjin started swirling his finger inside Felix’s belly button. Felix arched his back and screeched as Hyunjin’s finger swirled quickly inside the giggle button.

“BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HYUNJINNIEHEHEHEHEHEHE IHIHIHIHIHIT TICKLES SOHOHOHO BAHAHAHAHAHAHAD” Felix screeched as he wiggled like a mad man in Hyunjin’s lap.

“Of course it tickles my little giggle bug” Hyunjin teased as he brought his other hand to squeeze at Lix’s side again. He had one hand tickling Felix’s belly button while the other hand was switching from tickling around his tummy to his sides to his ribs. Felix was having a field day with his Hyung. After about 10 minutes of constant tickling, Hyunjin noticed the younger one wasn't fighting back as much. He slowed his tickles almost to a stop and just rubbed Felix’s tummy soothingly.

“That was really fun Jinnie…” Felix said as his ears turned red again. Hyunjin cooed at that.

“If you ever want tickles you let me know okay?” Hyunjin said as he kissed the side of Felix’s head. Felix nodded and snuggled further into Hyunjin’s hold.

[itzsana-kiddingmenow]

Behind the Scenes:

𝒍𝒆𝒆: Minho

𝒍𝒆𝒓: Seungmin and Felix (Chan is slightly involved ig)

𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘧𝘪𝘤 𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘬𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘴𝘰 𝘪𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘴𝘯'𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘤𝘶𝘱 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘦𝘢 𝘪 𝘴𝘶𝘨𝘨𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘴𝘤𝘳𝘰𝘭𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨! 💗🧋

𝕥𝕨: *bondage*, video taking, i got flustered reading this 🫠 AND IM WRITING THIS

𝕥𝕒𝕘𝕝𝕚𝕤𝕥: @someone-who-loves-kpop-saranghae @jeonginsdiary @leeknowstan33 @v--143 @wereallgonnadieonedaybutnottoday @inkytornpages @lajanaa

“HYUNG!” Seungmin screeched when Lee Know stuck his finger in his armpit again. 

“Hm?” The older asked innocently, boba eyes blinking slowly and a mischievous smile playing on his lips. 

“You know what you’re doing.” Seungmin whined, shoving at Minho’s hand. 

“Aweee. Seungminnie is too ticklish~” Minho cooed, watching as the younger visibly short-circuited, eye twitching as he blushed up to his ears. 

“Ugh. Don’t do it again.” Seungmin threatened, stifling a giggle when the older mocked him. 

Lino decided to find a new victim, choosing the person who looks the most unlikely to try and wreck him back. 

He was in his tickle monster mood, and he was thriving.

“Yongbok-ahhh~” Minho teased at the boy’s side with his finger. 

Sadly for the dancer, however, Felix had been watching the whole scene with Seungmin while posing for the concept pictures, since that’s what the group was doing. 

And Felix was already frustrated with how things were going, as the pictures weren’t coming out the way he hoped, and he had to do multiple retakes. 

He called for a break, snatching the handcuffs off of his belt. 

It was a look for the comeback, but it would certainly work in his favor to have his hyung vulnerable for some stress relief. 

Lixie stuck his tongue in his cheek, slowly approaching the nervous older, who giggled and shrunk under the younger’s intense gaze. 

“Please! I’m sorry we can talk about this! AHH!” Minho shrieked when Seungmin grabbed his wrists from behind, successfully immobilizing the oldest. 

Felix snapped the cuffs snug around the cat’s wrists, making sure to attach them round the pole above the begging older. 

The second he was open and vulnerable, Seungminnie ducked down and squeezed at Minho’s sides, already coaxing loud giggles out of the older. 

“plehehehease! noho tihihickling!” Minho giggled, shrieking with laughter when Lixie joined in silently, wiggling fingers into exposed armpits and watching him squirm and try to yank his arms down.

“Awe. Poor hyung. Should’ve thought of that before you decided to be a brat.” Felix chuckled darkly as Minho blushed a bright red. 

“nohoho PLEASE AHAHAHA!” Fingers in the bunny’s sides turned into fast digging in the crevices of his ribs, leaving the oldest in hysterics. 

“FELIX! FEHEHEHELIXAHH STOHOHOHOP!” Minho tried to sound stern, but the wide smile on his face and hysterical laughter didn’t help one bit. 

“Hey! I’m here too!” Seungmin immediately ducked his arms down to tickle at Lino’s hypersensitive thighs, leaving the older thrashing and screaming. 

Lee Know’s knees were shaking and on the verge of buckling due to the intense sensations, and he was practically bucking in every direction possible to escape the two pairs of hands tickling him to pieces. 

But he couldn’t. He couldn’t escape. He had to stand there and endure it all, at least until the two lers decided to granted him some mercy. 

“MIHINNIE! LIHIXIE! MEHEHEHERCY! PLEASE I CAHANT TAHAKE IHIT!” He screamed and thrashed as the fingers lifted off his body for a split second just to descend onto other, more sensitive spots. 

Tears of mirth welled up in Lino’s eyes. He tried to contain it, he really did. 

However, once they started to flow down his cheeks, they didn’t stop. 

“HAHAHAH! IHIHITS TOOHOO MUHUHUCH! IHIM SAHAHARRY I WOHOHONT DOHO IHIT AGAIN!” Minho let out a frustrated scream when the fingers never let up, only managing to keep him consistently in incoherent laughter. 

They finally granted him a minute’s break, watching as the oldest slumped against the poll.

Seungmin continued to poke at his side after the minute though. He made sure to have Felix squeezing harshly at the other side as well, and the contrasting tickles threw Minho into another round of laughter.

“What are you doing to him?” Chan’s voice drifted from behind the three boys, breaking off into giggles when he sees his eldest kid in such hysterics. 

“Ahhh. I see. What did he do this time?” Chan crossed his arms and grinned when Minho tried to beg for help, but was cut off when Lixie dug into his armpits again. 

“Go ahead. Tell him.” Seungmin’s eyes narrowed as Minho threw his head back, and Minnie made sure to protect the older’s head against the pole. 

“IHIHI WAHAS BEHEING A BRAHAHAT! IM SOHOHORRY PLEHEASE HELP ME!” Minho managed to make out through his choked laughter; he was starting to reach his limit. 

“Hmm. I actually have a better idea.” Channie started, following by pulling out his phone. 

“What are you…ohh. Okay, I see you!” Felix grinned as Chan snapped pictures of the poor boy, who screamed with laughter when Seungmin attacked his hips. 

“Ouuu Minho hyung! Smile for the camera, baby~” Felix teased. 

“IHIM AHAHALREADY LAHAHAUGHING!” Minho squealed. 

“Oh these are for the museum! Why are you so cute?!” Chan exclaimed, continuing to change angles just to fluster the poor boy. 

“Oooh! Take a video! STAYs will love it. So would you, hyung. No no, don’t try to deny it.~” Felix cooed when the bunny’s blush only deepened. 

Chan clicked start, and that’s when the two lers really went all out. 

“Hello STAYs! Look who decided to be a brat today~” Chan smiled at poor Minho from over the camera

“NOOHOHO! SOHOHOMEONE HEHEHEHELP! STOOOOP! I CAHAHAHAN’T TAHAHAKE IHIT!- ” Lino’s hysterical laughter turned into desperation, sobs of laughter racking his whole body as the two boys switched between spots, so fast that he started to see stars in his vision. 

“Oookay! I think that’s seriously enough guys, he might actually die.” Chan wiped the tears off of Lino’s exhausted face. 

“please…noho mohore…” He breathed out, body still jerking from the agitation. 

“Oh my god, did we go to far? Hyung i’m so sorry we got carried away and-” Felix worriedly started to ramble. 

“It’s okay…I-I didn’t mind.” Minho shyed away from the three boys’ cooing, face turning an adorable shade of pink. 

“Posted!” Chan suddenly chirped, staring down at his phone. 

“CHRISTOPHER! hey-GET THESE OFF OF ME, YOU BRATS!” Minho yanked at the handcuffs, screeching when the three ran out of the room in boisterous laughter.

[10 Minutes Later]

“Hyung? HAHA what happened?!” Changbin giggled when Minho shot him a grumpy look, shaking at the handcuffs yet again. 

“Can you just get these off-”

‘Ding!’ Came the notification from Binnie’s phone. 

The rapper pulled out his phone, staring at it for a few seconds before bursting into giggles.

“Dang. They really wrecked you, huh?” Changbin sent a cheeky smirk at the older.

“Huh?” Minho frowned. 

Binnie showed him the video that was posted on Chan’s official Instagram, and Lino groaned as the view count skyrocketed. 

“Hoorah. Now can you get these off? Please!” Minho whined. 

“Fine fine, just stay still.”

i hope you enjoyed! please check my intro post before interacting! love ya! 💕💗💖

also this is the fic with the two lers everyone wanted 🥺

idk about this one it seems too…rough ig

[minsungjinho]

Sorry my minds in the gutters but can you do like Felix or hyunjin is eating the reader out and the others walk in and he asks them if they want to join ?😂😭so sorry

yes. that’s all I have to say🤭

I wish I could have made it longer but college is kicking my ass!¡

word count 4.5K (skimmed proof read)

ft. hyunjin, lee know and jeongin

warnings below the cut - MDNI

warnings: female reader, oral, fingering, overstim, gangbang? protected & unprotected sex, handjob, biting, face fucking, pet names, slight degrading? lmk if I missed any

The road to becoming an idol wasn't an easy one, but at least you had your dorm mates to help you acclimate to the busy schedules and constant criticism.

Amongst other things.

Currently, your fingers were clutching at the blonde boy's hair, back arched and slightly damp with sweat. His tongue was working wonders on your clit, exploring every ridge and crease you had to offer.

Small, deep moans left his lips along with yours. It made you even more hot and bothered how much he enjoyed this also. His tongue lapped you up over and over, eventually teasing at your entrance once he could feel you dripping.

“F-f-f” Was all you could stutter, his name not daring to leave your lips.

He hummed in question, his textured tongue dipping into your core as he did so. Your body tensed lightly, then relaxed as he started to push it deeper inside of you. Each of his hands were on your knees, keeping you pried open with his arms wrapped around your thighs.

The tip of his petite nose was grazing your clit as he bobbed his tongue in and out, swallowing your essence dutifully, as if were his sole purpose to do so.

Your orgasm was dangerously close, too close for comfort while his face was so close to your cunt. You tried wiggling away, digging your heels into the mattress in an attempt to escape.

“Felix..” You whimpered, trying your best, but failing miserably, to escape from his grasp.

You’d never had an actual orgasm from someone eating you out before, it was too much. He hummed again, the vibrations of his low voice making your body shudder in delight.

“Please..” You were whispering, begging over and over again though you weren’t sure what exactly it was you wanted from him.

You lifted your head slightly to watch as he ate you out so deeply, hungrily- his hair bunched up and messy from your fingers intertwined in it. His hips slowly rolled into the mattress below him, you could imagine how his small little whimpers would sound as his dick hardened from the friction, if it weren't for his lips suckling around your clit that is.

Your body jolted immensely as your high started to run through you, Felix’s fingers making their way to your sopping wet hole to help you ride it out for as long as you could. Your fingers were numb, toes curled up tight, and breathing at a standstill as he messily toyed with your clit with his teeth.

“Yongbok-ah!” You thought you heard, though your ears were still ringing as your orgasm continued. Footsteps were walking towards his bedroom door.

Your body was still tensed around his fingers, your walls clamping against his fingers, bringing moans from his chest into your heat. Could he not hear whoever it was walking down the hallway? Were you losing it?

A second wave started rolling through you, his fingers gliding against the gummy part of your soaked cunt. Nothing could even remotely disturb you from how blissful you felt underneath this man, shaking with pleasure while he licks you clean.

“Yongbok-ah.” The voice starts again, from behind the bedroom door. “I’m craving some of your brownies.” The doorknob was turning, your body still utterly exposed and shaking from pleasure. “Can you make me so-” The voice trailed off, the door open about 45 degrees into the dimly lit room.

Your face was bright red with the heat from your high, but also from light embarrassment as you could feel their lingering on your body. Hickeys and bite marks were littered all over the skin of your breasts, not to mention the boy between your legs.

“Hyung,” Felix said with surprise, a raspy twinge in his voice while he wiped his mouth and chin with the back of his hand. His other hand still held your leg open wide.

You didn’t dare open your eyes, the exhaustion from two simultaneous orgasms weighing you down. Despite being intimate with almost all of the boys you still felt embarrassed when they saw you so vulnerable.

“Having fun, Y/N?” The voice at the door questioned, breaking into a chuckle. You now realize it was Hyunjin who stumbled into this rather messy situation.

“Hyung,” Felix said again, but with a hint of frustration in his tone.

“Not even going to offer to share? Naughty Lixie.” Hyunjin teased as more footsteps were gathering at the door frame.

At this point your arms were wrapped lazily over your face, trying to hide how utterly fucked out you were. Felix sighed, running a (wet) hand through his hair.

“What are you idiots doing- oh.” A third boy was now huddled around the doorframe, peeking in at your rather inappropriate activity.

Hyunjin, Jeongin, and Lee Know were all taking in the sight, looking at your blazing hot skin and Felix’s face smothered with your juices.

“What do you want me to say?” Felix started. “Come on in? Join the fun?” His voice was now aggravated and full of sarcasm as he sat up on his knees, the bulge in his pants far from concealed.

“Yes, actually.” Lee Know had rebutted, crossing his arms.

“Wait, why does Felix get to… you know.” Jeongin muttered questioningly, looking at his older members in slight shock. His face was bright red, just like yours.

“You haven’t?” Hyunjin scoffed, turning to the youngest.

“You have?” Both Lee Know and I.N. asked back with surprise.

Hyunjin didn’t answer but looked over to Felix who was now pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Well?” Jinnie asked the brownie boy, arms crossed but an imprint of his dick against his sweatpants.

Neither you nor Felix had known that any of the members were home. All of the lights were off, and it was silent for once.

Felix lowered his hand from his face, looking into your eyes that peeked out from between your arms. Your thoughts were more collected now, and the enjoyment of your orgasm faded completely. You shrugged, feeling too small to speak.

“What she says, goes,” Felix grumbled, lifting the hem of his shirt and bringing it over his head. “And don’t get in my way.”

You felt the arousal build between your legs again, the thought of four boys having their way with you clouding your mind. You’d never have imagined fooling around with Jeongin, feeling as if he were your little brother or something like that. That thought disappeared when you looked over and saw his dick pressed against his pants.

Felix had already taken off his pants and boxers by the time your eyes had returned to him, his hands gliding up your legs. He stopped at your hips, pulling you further down the bed. Fingers that weren’t his were now trailing across your jaw.

“Eyes over here, angel.” Hyunjin was squatted next to the bed, hand pulling your face towards him as he spoke. “We’ll be gentle, yeah?” The grin on his face said otherwise.

“If you feel uncomfortable, we can stop.” Lee Know chimed in from behind Jinnie.

“Yeah, you’re running the show tonight, pretty girl,” Felix added, slipping the condom over his dick and tossing the wrapper.

Your eyes gravitate toward I.N. who was still at the doorway. Hyunjin followed your gaze and chuckled. “This will be a first for him.” He whispered, winking at you before standing and releasing his hold on your jaw.

Lee Know’s sweatshirt was now on the ground, and Hyunjin's hand were untying the knot from the strings of his sweats while Felix lined himself up with you.

You turned your gaze back to Felix as his tip prodded your entrance.

“Fuck,” He muttered. “Still so wet.” He pushed his cock further into you, your eyes rolling back into your head as he stretched you gently. “And so fucking tight.” He groaned as he reached your hilt.

You moaned quietly as he pulled back out, just to slowly and deeply enter you again.

“Let’s see if the same can be said about her throat,” Hyunjin said with an audible grin. You looked back over at him, watching as he lazily tugged at his dick. “Open wide.” He said as his knees pressed into the mattress, sinking into place close to your face.

A sharp and fast thrust from Felix causes you to arch your back and let out a silent scream, mouth open wide with your head pressed against the bed.

“Yeah, that's it,” Hyunjin mumbled while bringing the throbbing tip of his dick onto your lips.

His free hand gripped at your scalp, turning you toward him fully in order to bury himself into your throat. Tears started to form at the corner of your eyes from how long he was, making you gag a bit while sinking his length past your lips.

Felix eagerly thrusted into you over and over, his breathing erratic with deep yet quiet moans escaping from his chest. His nails were digging into your hipbones, sure to leave bruises as he used them for leverage.

“Mm, Yongbok was right.” It was Hyunjin’s turn to moan in pleasure, his hips rolling back and forth with his length gliding in and out of your throat.

The eldest of the boys sat at Felix’s desk, simply watching the encounter happen. He looked over at the youngest who was too busy trying to hide his hard-on.

“Just going to sit there and watch?” Lee Know teased, a wicked grin on his lips.

“I-I mean- H-” I.N. stuttered and his face grew as red as a tomato.

“Just go touch her, don’t make it complicated.” The eldest nodded over to you, where one man was having his way with your mouth and the other was grinding his dick as deep as it could go.

Jeongin made his way over to the opposite side of the bed as Hyunjin, standing over you with his body stiff and awkward. You felt bad for the poor boy, who has probably never had his dick even looked at by another woman before.

Despite the fact that you couldn’t quite see him, you reached out for him, hand grazing over his upper thigh. Hyunjin’s cock made you cough and gag, moans still escaping from your lips despite that. Your fingers made their way to the youngest’s crotch, palming him through the fabric of his pants.

A small whimper came from him, leaving you feeling empowered despite your position. Felix’s thrusts became more erratic, his moans and sighs of pleasure getting louder and more frequent as he buried his cock into you. You felt yourself getting warm, too. The knot in your stomach starting to build pressure having two dicks use you like a toy.

Your fingers reached the waistband of I.N.’s pants, tugging on them to signify that he should remove them. As he did so, Felix brought his body over you, his forehead resting against your chest as he brought your nipple into his mouth.

“So fucking good, Y/N” He mumbles around your breast, relentlessly pounding into you.

Your moans are catching in your throat, making Hyunjin twitch in your mouth with his bottom lip between his teeth. The eldest was still spectating from a distance.

A hand grabs at your own, Jeongin’s you figure out after feeling the warm and slightly sticky length under your fingertips. Once you start slowly pumping his dick more precum starts to leak out of him. Felix is starting to become undone above you, his cock twitching and hardening even more so inside of you. You wrap your legs around his waist, his teeth roughly nipping at your tit in response.

“Such a pretty slut.” Hyunjin moans from above you, eyes never leaving the sight of your lips wrapping around his cock.

The stimulation is too much for you, but instead of letting it bother you- you let it bring you where you want to be the most. With three men groaning and grunting around you, your core starts to tighten and grip against Yongbok’s dick, making it harder for him to thrust deeply into you. Hyunjin is close too, or at least he’s enjoying himself because he’s now situated over you completely, his hands and knees on all fours as he fucks your throat.

Jeongin’s groaning brings you to your third orgasm of the night, moans and screams unable to leave your mouth due to how hard it's being stuffed. Your walls tighten around Felix’s dick so well that it causes him to blow his load in an instant, barely able to move himself inside of you at all. Your grip tightens around the youngest’s length, his breath hitching while he throbs against your fingers.

Your legs shake so badly that you are no longer able to hold them around Felix’s waist, letting them fall against the blankets beneath you. Felix’s hands rub at your waist, his forehead pressed against the center of your chest as he catches his breath, cock softening inside of you.

You’re lightheaded, unable to breathe fully due to the oversized length of Hyunjin pummeling your throat repeatedly. This adds to your high, leaving it lingering as Felix pulls himself out of you and I.N. starts to fuck himself into your hand.

The eldest walks over, a sly grin on his face as he replaces Yongbok’s position between your legs. He’s still fully clothed, but unable to hide his boner beneath his clothes.

“Enjoying yourself?” He asks rhetorically.

His fingers dance around your thighs, pinching them gently and rubbing the sore spot afterward. Jeongin picks up speed, and Hyunjin stills in the back of your throat with a loud, growling moan, your nose pressed against his stomach as he gags you completely. His seed is running down your throat, warm and plentiful enough to be able to tell. You gasp for air, unable to breathe while he’s reveling in the feeling of your throat closing in around his cock.

He slowly removes himself from your mouth, Jeongin still oozing copious amounts of precum into your palm. Felix appears back into your sight, a damp washcloth held out for Hyunjin to wipe your face clean.

“You did so well, angel.” His cheeks were flushed and his forehead had many beads of sweat threatening to fall down his skin. The warm cloth is brought to your face, gently wiping at your lips and jaw.

Once you’re cleaned up, and Hyunjin leaves your side you bring your attention back to the maknae. He’s a panting mess, his head tilted back with one hand gripping at your wrist tightly. You add more pressure, causing him to let out a whimper that makes you shudder.

Despite what your body has been through, you feel the need for just a little bit more. Lee Know is still toying with you, his fingers collecting your slick and bringing them to his lips for a taste.

“Jeongin,” You whisper, barely able to be heard by the raspy and raw tone of your voice. “Hey.” You pull your hand away, a disappointed look arising from his face.

“Will you fuck me?” You ask quietly, the eldest’s eyebrow lifting in surprise.

I.N.’s face becomes surprised, breathing still erratic from how close he was to cumming all over your hand.

“You heard her,” Lee Know interrupted, eyeing the youngest down. He rolls his eyes at the lack of Jeongin’s movement, turning around and grabbing a condom from the box Felix had left on the dresser.

I.N. unwrapped it, carefully rolling it down his length as Lee Know situated you like a doll. He wrapped an arm around your waist, pulling himself under you and bringing each of your knees to either side of his waist.

He was still fully clothed, but you were intrigued to see where this would lead. His legs dangled off of the edge of the bed, your arms shaky as they held your body above his chest.

“I wanted an up-front seat, VIP treatment.” He whispered into your ear, the youngest boy walking behind you. You felt your pussy tighten at his words, still sore but eager for what was to come next.

“Hyung, what are yo-” Jeongin tried questioning.

“Go ahead, I.N-ah. Give Y/N what she wants.” Lee Knows demands to the maknae brought a chill down your spine, your bottom lip finding itself between your teeth.

As Jeongin steps close and starts to situate himself, Lee Know collects stray hairs from around your face and soothes them down. He rubs at your cheek affectionately, smiling genuinely before he speaks.

“I’ve been waiting for a night light this.”

Before you can respond or even react, Jeongin has pushed his length against your core and starts pushing his way into you.

Your fingers clench at the blankets below you, head dropping and almost hitting Lee Know’s face in the process. The eldest pulls your chest onto his, your ass high up in the air for the youngest to get the full view as your cunt wraps tightly around his dick.

He lets out airy moans as he reaches your hilt, hands trembling on your hips while he pulls out briefly before shoving his way back in. If Lee Know hadn’t pulled you into his chest, you would have collapsed there.

Minho brings your face into his hands, watching you for a moment as you take his friend's dick from behind. He pulls you into him, his plush lips pressed against yours that leak small whimpers and moans. Jeongin picks up speed, gripping at your ass as it jiggles and bounces with each thrust.

Minho’s tongue grazes your bottom lip before shoving past it, dancing with yours as your breathing picks up. One hand leaves your face, traveling up to your hair and gripping gently at it. You moan into his mouth at the slightly painful pleasure, mixed in with Jeongin finding your sweet spot.

He hits it over and over, the gummy tissue inside of your walls starting to throb along with your clit. You grab for Lee Know’s hand, bringing it up to your cunt and hoping he will be nice for once.

“Feeling touch starved, kitten?” He grinned against your lips before collecting a bit of slick and rubbing at your clit.

Your body jolts, the mixture of penetration and clit stimulation causing the warmth in your stomach to come back harder than before. The eldest removes his lips from yours, your moans now being heard throughout the whole dormitory and probably even on other levels of the apartment complex.

His lips wrap around your neck, sucking and biting roughly while Jeongin starts thrusting into you hard and deep, no longer fast and messy.

“F-fuck” Is all you can seem to mutter out, your body so close to being spent and collapsing completely.

Lee Know’s other hand meets yours, bringing it to the button and zipper of his pants. You try your best to undo them, the warmth in your core threatening to explode at any moment.

Jeongin’s thrusting ends and only small little movements into your cunt remain as he cums hard. The youngest slowly slips away from you, pulling out as he slumps into a chair in the corner of a room with his dick softening.

“What do you think, Y/N?” Lee Know speaks in just barely a whisper. “Can you handle one more?” His cock was free from his pants, no thanks to the help of you attempting to undo his buttons.

You gulp, slowly nodding as your eyes meet his. Hyunjin and Felix are clothed again, leaning against the desk side by side as they watched the two of you- their dicks hard as rocks again.

“Be a good girl and take this off for me, yeah?” He pinches at his shirt, a small smile on his face as he kicks off his pants and underwear.

You do your best to lift it over his head, your limbs feeling like jelly. He is fully naked underneath you now, something you’ve been eager for since he made his way over to join the party earlier.

“Hmm,” He hums, looking you in the eyes. “Let me take you raw?” He half asked, half stated. His eyes held both the intensity of a wildfire, but also the calmness of a still lake on a summer evening.

You hear I.N. stand up from his seat in the corner, fully clothed again as he joins the other two boys at the desk. However, your eyes don’t leave Minhos, and without thinking too much about it you nod before bringing your lips to his.

So far you’ve had two dicks fuck you tonight, Felix was perfectly curved with the perfect amount of length to satisfy, Jeongin was a bit longer and poked your cervix gently.

Lee Know’s cock pushed into your walls and brought your mouth wide open, thicker than the other boys, this wasn’t to say he didn’t have the length to go along with it- he was very well endowed.

He wasted no time with you, pushing down on your hips as he stretched your walls wide. Your face falls into the crook of his neck, biting down as he slides himself raw through you. An almost growly groan leaves his lips once he reaches your hilt, your cunt sucking him in and trapping him there.

Whimpers of pain and pleasure could be heard from you, lips quivering as he pulled himself out just so slam back in much more forcefully. The other boys had been relatively gentle with you, only getting a bit hectic when they were close to the finish line.

Minho had other plans.

He didn’t even bother to get you to ride his dick, power-bottoming you like there was to be no tomorrow. You got wetter and wetter, juicy squelching noises filling up the room for the others to hear.

“Jagiya,” Minho started, his breathing quick as he fucks you from below. “Still horny after all this time? Such a cock slut.” He whispered that last part to you, a loud and whiny moan ripping through your chest.

Lee Knows arms wrapped around your back, pulling you closer into him as he thrusts wildly with no regard to how loud the clapping noises were.

Your ass jiggled every time he pounded into you, your tits would have too if he weren't holding you so tightly. His thrusts weren’t calculated or meaningful by any means, but fast and deep as he was chasing his own high.

He keeps fucking you like this, sweat starting to collect on his hairline, and both of your juices creating a small puddle on the blankets.

Needing more, Minho flips the both of you over, your body now under his as he towers over you.

“On your stomach, kitten.” He demands softly, one of his hands groping your chest with his dick still throbbing inside of you.

You follow his orders, slowly and shakily rolling over face-first into the bed. He slides his dick back in no more than half a second of it falling out, no warning as he drives himself into you.

He hit you the deepest he had that night, the pain of your cervix bruising bringing a whole new sensation of pleasure to your groin as the heat started to warm your insides. Your hands tried clenching at something, anything, only blankets and pillows within reach.

Minho notices, bringing a hand over yours and interlocking his fingers with a tight squeeze. His thrusts were more melodic now, the new position allowing him to wreck you even harder than he had been. He left little bite marks all over your back, sucking on the skin just a bit until a light pink mark formed.

His moans were angelic, like the feeling of finding a unicorn, or the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Lee Know was not in a sassy, wicked mood. To see him enjoying himself, enjoying you made you practically cum right then and there.

Your walls sucked him in more, his grunts of pleasure and hard work bringing him close to the finish line. You did your best to push yourself into him as he thrust, but your legs still felt like jelly and you were also far too close to finishing.

“Are you gonna cum for me, darling?” Minho all but whispered into your ear. “Or are you just going to sit there looking all dumb and fucked out?” His grin could be heard through his words, cut short by your cunt clenching around him.

“Fucking Christ, how can you still be so tight?” He resumed biting into the skin of your back, right between your shoulder blades as his pace quickened.

You were toppling over the edge, the ridges of his cock brushing against your most gummy, sensitive areas inside while leaving small little painful nips all over your body. It was painful, your last orgasm of the night, but you wouldn’t have traded it for anything after feeling his hot, sticky cum painting your pussy white.

“Ffuck-” He grunted, his thrusting becoming slow, deep little jabs as he unloaded himself into you.

Your vision was blurry, fading as you felt him use your cunt to milk himself dry. Your throat was raw, with no moisture whatsoever as you cried out in ecstasy. That was the last moment you had vividly remembered before waking up.

You had a soft, large teeshirt on and a pair of boxers. You were laid down in a different bed, neither yours nor Felix’s. Your body was sore and stiff when you tried to sit up, giving up after a few tries and only turning your head to see a sleeping Jeongin to your right, and a half-asleep Lee Know to your left. Felix was weighing you down, his chest resting on your hips with his head using your stomach as a pillow. Hyunjin was nowhere to be found.

“Good morning, Sunshine.” A soft voice spoke next to you. Lee Know looked over, a gentle smile on his face.

He was in clothes again, different ones this time- wet hair too.

“We tried waking you up to shower, but you didn’t budge.” Hyunjin walked into the room with a few glasses of water, handing one to you as you just barely sat up, trying not to disturb Yongbok.

“And these two?” You nodded over to the younger boys, both sleeping hard while cuddling against your body.

“Looks like you tired them out.” Lee Know scoffed and sighed. “Now they’re sleeping in my bed.” His grumpy expression returned, causing you to giggle ever so lightly.

“Fancy a bath?” Hyunjin asked, a towel draped over his shoulder.

“I would love that.” You exclaimed, multiple areas of your body feeling sticky or sweaty. “If I can get up..”

The three of you laughed loudly, waking the two boys from their peaceful sleep. You had all agreed to order Chinese and spend the rest of the night watching old movies until it was time to sleep.

[soap143]

hi!! could you write a lee!han and ler!chan and changbin fic with the prompts 1, 29 and 42? thank youu 🫶

Omg I haven’t writen a fic in a WHILE. I’ve missed writing so much😭 Oof this request is ancient, sorry anon! I love it though. This trio is so SJAKHDKAJ I adore itt.

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1 “how much does this tickle from 1 to 10?”

29 “someone told me your little secret…”

42 “if you laugh, you lose.”

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Secret

lee!Han

lers!Chan, Changbin

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Jisung had really trusted Felix… he still couldn’t believe he ratted him out that easily! What happened? You might be asking. Well, it went something like this…

After a long day of recording in the pool, it was safe to say everyone was exhausted. Han was happy to share a room with his sunshine twin, laying down in the bed next to Felix.

It has been confirmed by science that humans are prone to confessing things whem physically tired, and right now Han was absolutely drained and very sleepy.

He still, however, swung his arm around Yongbok and whispered in his ear.

“I have a secret, but I you cannot tell anyone!” the ace whisper shouted.

“Oooh I like secrets. Go ahed, I won’t tell.” the quick exitedly giggled.

“Ok so, you know how today at the pool, while playing water rugby right. We sort of… t-tickled each other a lot to get the ball out og eachother’s hands…” Jisung started to fiddle with his fingers.

“Oh my God if you didn’t like it there’s nothing wrong with it! You shouldn’t be afraid to-” the blonde haired boy was suddenly interrupted.

“No um, it was quite the opposite…” the quokka whined, hiding his red face behind his palms.

“Oh- Oooh!” Felix put the dots together “So, you actually liked it? I mean… that’s not really all that weird honestly. I-I think I enjoy it too…” Now both boys were flustered.

Both twins were giggling all night long about their new found mutual interest.

•••

Han had most definetly overestimated Felix’s ability of keeping secrets. From the second they had woken up the blonde had been acting weird as hell. He was all flustered over nothing, really jumpy and quiet. Something seemed off, and Jisung quickly saw how the other members were quickly noticing.

He most definetly that their leader and one of Yongbook’s best friends Chan would most definetly notice, but he tried not think much about it…

Although not even 15 minutes later he heard his deep voiced friend’s husky and loud laugnter coming from Chan and Changbin’s room… he knew that couldn’t be good. Han was alredy going red at the flustering sound. It really sounded like Felix was being tickled to tears…

At first he thought that it was maybe just their daily random wrecking session. But once the laughter stopped and he heard quick steps echoing in the hallway that were suspiciously getting closer to his room he knew he was done for.

“Someone told me your little secret…” Chan panted barging into Han’s bedroom.

“Shit, I knew I shouldn’t have trusted Felix!” Jisung screamed, making sure his stupid bandmate could hear “How did you even-”

“Oh please, everyone knows poor Felix can’t keep a secret for more than 14 minutes at best~” Changbin teased, chuckling at the younger’s flustered reaction.

“We got him for you already, but now it’s your turn.” the leader stated, wiggling his fingers in Jisung’s direction.

“Y-you’re crazy! How are you even sure we’re even talking about the same thing?” the smaller rapper tried fishing himself out this sticky situation.

“Just stop talking and let us do our thing already…” the dweakki tsked, tackling his dongsaeng and easily pinning him, perhaps because the person below him wasn’t fighting back at all. But that’s a story for another time.

“P-plehehease don’t do this! You’re insane!” Jisung squirmed and wiggled in his hyungs grasp as much as he could.

Both elders had stopped teasing the youngee and just got to work. Bin pinned Hannie’s arms with his knees, planning on attacking his upper body. While Chan got ready sitting on the lee’s hips, aiming for his lower body.

“Oh, this is going to be fun!” the wold rubbed his hands in eximent.

Jisung tried his best worst to get his ruthless hyungs off himself, but they just wouldn’t budge. He then quickly realized he was way too ticklish to be trapped like this.

“Nohoho please I’m begging you! I really cahan’t take it!” the youngest pleaded.

“Look how cute he is, even admitting it himself~” the muscle man teased, gently scribbling his finger into Han’s oversensitive armpit.

“Eheheheh stohohohop, nohohoho!” Sung giggled.

“There is no way you’re that ticklish. I’m barely even touching you!” Binnie laughed, gasping in amazement.

Jisung just shook his head side to side, unable of taking the soft tickles.

“Let’s play a game, if you laugh, you lose.” the oldest suggested, wiggling his eyebrows.

Without wasting even a zeptosecond they goy to work, and Han realized how serious they were about this. So he sealed his lips and held his breath, trying to ignore the overwelming sensations that were about to overtake his body.

The two oldest started off slow, with Bin only softly tracing Jisung’s collar bone and neck area and Chan gently squeezing his sides. The ace’s breathing got quicker and heavier, the veins in his neck popping out more than ever.

“Look at his face, it’s all red~” Changbin pointed out, only making the challenge more difficult.

Jisung was literally shaking and doinv everything in his will to hold back his laughter. Yet nothing worked, he knew he couldn’t control it any longer.

The oldest member gradually started increasing the intensity of the tickling by pressing his fingers deeper into the poor victim’s ribs. Bin moved his vibrating fingers around Jisung’s rib-chest-armpit area, making Han’s eyes go wide and face go incredibly crimsom deep red.

Chan saw this and knew the younger was close to breaking, so, he just went all in and dug all ten fingers into his lower sides.

“PFFFTTHAHAHA HYUNG PLEHEHEHASE NOHOHOHOHO!” Jisung roared at the very top of his lungs. He was not holding back any laughter at all anymore.

Both the lers just smiled at eachother, almost reading their own minds. They had go give Jisung what he wanted and needes to bad, even if he denied it.

“Hey, bro. How much does this tickle from 1 to 10?” Chan suddenly asked, lightly squeezing the top of the quokka’s thighs.

“AAAH- don’t dohoho that…” Han screamed.

“Hey, answer my question!” the oldest furrowed his eyebrows, bringing his hand back to the lee’s sensitive thighs.

“Wait, can you do it again? I can’t quiete remember the feeling…” Jisung had the audacity to tease to tease the older.

“So that’s how you wanna do it? Alright. Tell me, how much does this tickle from 1 to 10.” Chan asked again, squeezing again.

The singer flinched quite harshly, twisting his body to one side. Even he was surprised with his sensitivity…

“Ummm, I’d say about 4.” Han stubbornly stated.

“Interesting… what about this?” Changbin questioned squeezing the sides of the younger’s chest.

“EEEK- uhuhummm, like a 5.”

The leader rolled his eyes. Han was brave for playing around like this.

“And how much does this tickle?” Chan suddwnly asked pressing his fingers into Jisung’s sides.

Said boy bucked his hips so harshly he almosg knocked the older sitting on his hips.

“Ahaha… I don’t think this tickled at all, so 2.” the rapper smiled, preeeetty satisfied with his rating.

“This doesn’t tickle?” Chan asked once again, this time putting more pressure when squeezing Sung’s sides.

“NOHOHO n-not at all!” the younger stuttered, holding back as much laughter as he could while digging his feet into the matress and his whole body shaking.

“Well, then this shouldn’t tickle either~” the dark rapper teased, massaging in between the younger’s ribs.

While Changbin was going crazy on Hannie’s insanely ticklish ribs, Chan turned back around to face the quokka’s legs.

His shuffling brought attention to Jisung, whom was going ballistic under Bin’s incredibly skillfull tickling; he would grab one rib at a time and teasingly vibrate it, going from the upper to the lowest bones.

“NAHAHAHA CHAHAN DOHOHON’T YOU DARE! PLEHEASE!” the ace screeched, forgetting who was the oldest in the room…

“Chan? Whos’ Chan? That’s hyung to you! This is what you’re gonna get for being a brat.” the kangaroo gasped in surprise at the younger’s behaviour.

Without thinking much, he grabbed the quokka’s knee. This action alredy made Han scream at least one or two octaves higher. His knees were way too ticklish.

Chan was aware of this, and was going to take the perfext advange of it. He simply started squeezing and prodding at it, making Jisung go ballistic.

“LEHEHET GOHO, LET GO NOHOHOW! PLEHEHEASE I CAHAHAN’T!” Han begged.

But none of his hyungs listened.

The oldest was taking his sweet time with his knees. He would take one at a time and spread his fingers on them, simply squeeze them or even attack the twice as ticklish back of the knees.

Changbin smiled down at the younger as he squeezed the sides of his chest, vinbrated all 10 of his fingers onto his ribs and masaged his hypersensitive armpits.

“AHAHAHAHAHA I CAHAHAN’T TAKE THIHIHIHIS!” the singer howled, letting put the most eaepiercing screams Bin had ever heard in his life.

The two ler’s were simply quiet, too focused on their work to notice how the quokkas laughter slowly quieted down and he gradually stopped squirming as much.

“Awww, Binnie look at him. He’s so weak to tickling~” Chan tormented, poking Han’s cheek.

“Can’t you really take it? You’re such a kid!” Changbon laughed at the younger’s red face.

“You guys almost killed me…” Jisung slumped down, catching his breath.

“Oh, we’re not done yet! And I’m sure you didn’t want us to stop either.” Chan sweetly sang, chuckling at Han’s wide-eyed face.

“We didn’t even get to play the game properly. Now, are you going to rate the tickling seriously, or do you want us to wreck you like that again?” the older asked, resting his hands on the quokka’s inhumanly ticklish thighs.

Han quickly shook his head no, agreeing to play for real now.

This time Changbin started by dragging his fingernails against the lee’s red and veiny neck from all the screaming.

“Ehehehe plehehehease nohohot thehere… I think thahahat’s a 7, juhuhust stohop!” Jisung giggled, scrunching his shoulders up as much as he could.

Bin nodded, writing it down into his mind. He then moved down to the younger’s collar bones, tracing along the sensitive area.

“AAAAH stohop hyuhuhng plehehease! 8! 8! 8!”

“Wow, by time we get to his legs we’ll reach 15…” Chan sighed. Maybe Jisung was too ticklish for these kind of games?

His armpits were next, and he knew he was done for. If his collar bones were an 8, that meant everything else must be 10 or over.

Binnie massagef one quick circle into the sensitive spot, making Jisung agressively flinch and almost knock the older off himself.

“9… next spot please.”

Changbin barely got to touch his ribs before the younger was flinching and giggling again.

“Plehehease move quicker, I really can’t take this… that’s a 9.5.” Jisung breathed out.

“Oh please, you ticklish baby. We’ll go as fast or slow as we want, and you’ll take it all.” the leader barked out.

The following spot were his sides, and he knew they were going to be a strong 10.

This time it was Chan’s turn to measure the younger’s sensitivity.

“Please just get this done with…” the quokka whined.

The oldest purposely teased the younger. He would pretend to bring his fingers down and then quickly snap them back up. He then just placed his fingers on the soft skin, not doing anything.

“GAAH just dohoho it! PLEASE!” Han screamed in agony.

“Fine, since you asked so nicely~” Chan finally squeezed the squirming boy’s sides.

Just when Ji thought it was all over and he could finally rate it, the tickling didn’t stop. In fact, the wolf continued attacking his poor sides for at least another 10 seconds.

“YAHAHAHA STOHOHOP THIHIHS, YOU ALREADY TIHIHICKLED MEHEHE!!!” Han angrily yelled, trying to kick Chan with his knees.

“I mean, your sides were obviously going to be rated 10, so at least I thought I could enjoy myself a little~”

“9.7” Jisung stubbornly stated. If he could cross his arms, roll his eyes and walk away sassily, he would.

“Are just going to keep on doing this? What’s next, 9.999?” the older rapper giggled.

“What? You told me to rate it. I am doing exactly what you asked me to.”

Changbin and Chan looked at eachother and broke down in laughter. Han really wanted to be wrecked until he couldn’t remembee his own name.

“Now, we just know that the whole entirity of your legs are a 10. You cannot try to argue by saying something like 9.98. So, we’re just going to enjoy ourselves for a bit.” Bin smiled down innocently and the younger, as he angrily tugged at his arms.

“Hey! You can’t do that!”

“Who said we can’t? What are you gonna do? Stop us? I don’t think so~” Chan smirked, flicking his finger at Jisung’s forehead.

As the oldest situated himself on Han’s ankles, Binnie bent down a little to reach his thighs.

Han gulped one last calm and controlled breath in before the torture started. Although he couldn’t lie, all this tickling made him much happier than he was before… maybe he was enjoying this a little more than he thought he would.

Although his thoughs were soon pushed away as an overwhelming feeling took all over his lower body.

“NOHOHOHOHOHO CHAN HYUNG, BINNIE HYUNG I’M BEGGING PLHEHEHEASE!” Jisung pleaded, his legs shaking.

Changbin was doing the dirtiest work by squeezing Han’s incredibly ticklish inner thighs, even going as far as shoving one of his fists between his legs, just so he couldn’t even relieve the feeling by squeezing them together. He was pinching, massaging, you name it, Changbin was doing it to Jisung’s dreaded spot.

Not only was Bin torturing that one place, he would also sometimes trie to attack the upper and under side of his thighs, keeping Han on his toes.

“BIHIHIHINNIE HYUNG NOHOHOHO!” He screamed and the rapper found yet another more sensitive spot under his thighs.

Chan was watching all this with the widest smile on his face. Binnie was so good at the tickling, he wasn’t even sure if the younger could take another pair of hands. But the idea of the quokka going twice as crazy and ballistic than he was now made a tingle run down Chan’s spine,

Surely enough, soon 10 more fingers joined in by grabbing both his knees with his hands. The back of his knuckles lightly masaged the upper side of Ji’s kneecaps, while his thumbs shoved themselves to the undersides of Sung’s knees, massaging deep circles into the soft skin.

The quokka’s eyes went from crincled to wide real quick. The move Channie had pulled right there was illegal.

“HYUHUHUHUHNG, CHANNIE HYUHUHUHNG STOHOHOHOP I CAHAHAN’T TAKE BOTH OF YAHAHA’LL” the poor victim howled, simply giving up and going limp.

The oldest noticed this and softly nudged Changbin to let him know that they should wrap this up.

“Alright, I think we should finish now. Did you enjoy this, Hannie~” Chan teased, rubbing at Jisung’s previously tickled spots to get rid of the ghost tickles.

“Y-yeahah, it was great…” the younger gulped, slowly catching his breath with the toothiest smile on his face.

“…Sooo, how was it?” Felix quietly asked from behind the door, which was now slightly more open.

“You little shit! Have you been listening the whole time?!” Jisung gasped in betrayal, quickly jumping up to his feet and running towards the wide-eyed, red faced Lix, who was soon sprinting aswell.

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Oof, hope you liked it! This is a long one lol😭 I don’t what else to say, but I hope you enjoyed❤️😁