#yet somehow i barely slept last night??? again?????

[darcyolsson]

goodnight tumblr if you see me online after this you should send someone to whack me over the head with a cartoonishly large hammer

[artificial-transmutations]

4k! Dropout Dorm 3

Aiden woke up in the middle of the night. His body felt kind of itchy, especially his chest. As he moved his hand to scratch the itchy parts, he was confused. There were some hairs on his chest. Not one or two, but quite some, even though it didn't feel like it qualified for 'a lot'. 

He looked over to Marvin, who was sleeping in his bed. It was dark in the room, so he could only see the silhouette of his roommate, but it was pretty clear he was fast asleep. 

Since Aiden didn't want to risk waking up Marvin by making light or going to the bathroom, he tried to assess the situation by feel alone. As he had already noticed, there were some chest hairs that definitely weren't there before. They were mainly concentrated in the central chest area, in the ridge between his two underdeveloped pectoral muscles. 

Feeling his way down, the hairy pattern stopped soon once his hand left the immediate chest area. However, as he went even further down, to his belly, a trail of short hairs started again below his belly button, narrow and centered, leading down to his boxer shorts. 

Speaking of which, the whole hairy situation that Aiden couldn't quite explain had another side effect. Again, Aiden felt his manhood strain against his underwear, leaking precum like a faucet. Suddenly having body hair was... something else. Something arousing.

His dick twitched when he finally touched his groin through his boxers. Yes, there was also some hair on his crotch, and it seemed to be growing. Aiden pushed his hand further into his underwear and grasped his rock hard shaft. It took all his willpower to suppress a stifled moan. It would really be best to let go of his cock now and try to get back to sleep. But it just felt so good. It was like his hand refused to let go of his stiff rod. Aiden slowly pumped on it while moving his other hand down to his own chest, stroking his own hair. 

Okay, ignoring it was obviously not working. Aiden interrupted his stroking to wiggle out of his boxers under the sheets. With a bit more room to wiggle, he would be making less noise. Once that was done, his hand took hold of his needy member yet again, and he started stroking on it for real. His precum had leaked through the whole fabric of his boxers, and now it was coating his bare dick, making the whole sensation much, much more intense. He was in seventh heaven as he pleasured himself.

It didn't take long until Aiden neared his peak, and with every thrust of his hand, he felt like he was about to cum. Finally, he grunted quietly and shot his load. One, two, three... five spurts of cum hitting the inside of his blanket and his new body hair, mixing with the sweat from the exertion.

That was better, decided Aiden, as he drifted off to sleep again, the wet blanket clinging to his body.

***

Marvin had slept wonderfully. He felt energetic and ready to take on the world. The alarm clock showed that he had woken up early, so he didn't have to hurry.

Careful not to wake up Aiden who was entangled in his blanket, Marvin got out of bed and stretched.

When he looked back, he noticed that in his bed there was a clear print of where he had been lying: a wet spot in the form of his body was clearly visible, and even now, Marvin felt slick from sweat. Who would have thought that a little workout could be such a perspiring experience?

It didn't matter much. Marvin was in a good mood. The wet spot would dry over the day and if he had to change his bedding a bit more often, it was a small price to pay for such a good feeling. Well, it was time to get ready for classes. 

Right, classes. The thought somehow didn't excite Marvin all too much. Today was the introduction to computer graphics, a course he had been most looking forward to in the last week. However, his struggle with the assignments yesterday made him realize how much effort it took to do one assignment in the right way. It might take a while before he could master this new class, he mused.

Well, no use in getting depressed about it. Besides, it was just this course today, so in the late morning, he was already free again. He could take another look at his assignment then!

Or... he could use this opportunity to go to the gym again. His body felt restless and sweaty from the workout yesterday and now he had nothing to do, so what harm could a bit more exercise cause? That actually sounded like a really great idea in his head! The only problem was that he only had one pair of gym clothes and he hadn't gotten to wash it after yesterday's session. But that shouldn't be too much of a problem. He'd just wear them again and wash them in the afternoon. Easy!

So, Marvin shoved the gym clothes into his backpack and left the room early. Perhaps, he could get a good breakfast and enjoy the sun a bit?

As the room door clicked closed, Aiden awoke as well. He stretched out his limbs, and felt a bit stiff from the movements, but he felt relaxed. It took him a few moments to remember where he was and what had happened yesterday. Yesterday! He had masturbated while sleeping, under his sheets, in his dorm room, right next to his roommate! Oh shit.

The wet spot on the sheet was still there, although some parts had dried and crusted up already. The smell wasn't really noticeable though, at least not to Aiden. It had mixed into the aroma of the room perfectly.

Now was a good opportunity to look at himself. It was undeniable: He was a bit hairier than he was used to. That wasn't quite everything, too. There was a bit more meat on his bones than what he was used to. It wasn't pure muscle - but not pure fat either. Instead, it was like a mixture of both. 

Aiden scratched his head. Something decidedly weird was going on here. But it was probably best not to worry about it too much. He was sure that whatever was going on would resolve itself on its own. After all, it appeared on its own as well, right?

His new hair was glued to his body by his dried up cum but became loose quickly when he scratched over the new hair. The feeling of his fingers in his newly developed hair made him hard again, but this time, Aiden didn't give in so easily. He needed to get to class. Ugh. Going to class felt like such an effort, and Aiden really contemplated just not going but staying here some more, perhaps jerk off again once or twice...

But no. He couldn't skip classes on his second day already. So, with a sigh, he wrapped his dick in his boxers from yesterday and pulled on the shirt from the floor. It didn't look that bad, and the cum stains were mostly on the inside. So, it was considerably less effort to just wear that again than to get a new one from the wardrobe.

Aiden arrived at his course too late. The professor was already so deep in a mathematical prove Aiden hoped he would be able to catch up. Surely, they wouldn't do something too difficult at the start of the semester. 

As Aiden tried to get into the subject however, he noticed that the girl he was sitting next to looked at him disgustedly and covered her nose. After one or two minutes, she changed seats, bringing one empty place between her and him.

What was her problem? Aiden briefly considered asking her, but then decided not to. Screw her, whatever her problem was.

Still, the situation kept nagging him throughout the lecture. He didn't manage to follow the professor at all, and only because of that stupid girl. Women.

However, the rest of the academic day wasn't much better. For some reason, Aiden kept coming late because he didn't want to hurry between the different buildings on the campus. It was hardly his fault if they decided to squeeze the lectures this close together, right?

Also, he found himself struggling with the concepts. Even things he had learned in high school that should come easily were pretty hard for him today. That was probably because it didn't challenge him enough. 

Meanwhile Marvin's day was better. Sure, he didn't get much on the computer graphics course, but he met some cool new people there and socialized. That was an entirely new experience for Marvin, who was the very definition of an introvert. But today he was in such a good mood that he gladly made contacts. 

The best part however came when the computer graphics course ended. Full of energy, Marvin rushed to the gym and found it deserted again. He quickly changed into his gym clothes that smelled a bit manly and got to work. Today, he wanted to give the treadmills a try. Like an addict, he approached the machines and quickly figured out how they worked. What was he being afraid of yesterday?

Quickly, he got into a comfortable trot and was happy. Sweat was running down his body before long, but it just felt so good, putting his body to work.

For some reason, Marvin was incredibly horny again today, and as he turned up the speed a bit, his mind started to wander. The bit of definition his body had had after yesterday’s training had been really sexy. If he really got into this whole gym stuff, he surely would have no problem picking up girls whenever he wanted. After all, he would be the perfect package: Smart *and* sexy.

However, as soon as he thought about picking up girls, he found the thought strangely unappealing. Sure, he was an introvert, but even he found that a bit weird. Marvin decided not to think too much about it, though and instead turned up the speed yet again.

Marvin was at it for another couple of hours until he realized that he hadn't eaten anything at all since breakfast and was starving. He stopped the treadmill and left for the dorms, eating on the way. He had worked out for a few hours and was drenched in sweat when he arrived back at room 148, but still, Aiden was not yet there. He probably had a day full of classes, Marvin figured. 

He undressed in front of the bathroom mirror to take a look at himself. Damn, he didn't look bad at all! His body was glistening from sweat, and he could really recognize some progress from his workout already! His body was fitter than he had ever been and had some definition. He even looked a bit taller and broader. 

When he put on his usual clothes, the latter theory was quickly proven right. Both his shirt and pants were ill fitting and felt much too constraining. Even his underwear felt tight. He didn't even have an erection right now, but the front of his tighty whities looked like somebody had tried to stuff a banana into it, with little success. 

Was that, too, a side effect of the workout? It could be, he reasoned, because of hormones or something along those lines. 

That was also probably the reason for his tan that had darkened again considerably. 

Nevertheless, he needed to do something about his clothes. He would look ridiculous in them tomorrow for classes, and for some reason, that was really nagging him. 

Without thinking twice, Marvin grabbed his keys and left the dorm room again. Time to shop for new clothes!

When he arrived at the mall and wiped the beads of sweat from his forehead, Marvin was immediately drawn to a sports supplier. It made sense: Most of the light fabric that was meant for sports could also be worn as regular clothing. The athletic clothing was light and usually wide enough to let some air to his body. Perhaps this would help him sweat a bit less.

After browsing for a while, Marvin settled on some items: A few pair of gym shorts, some t-shirts and tank tops as well as a pair of gray sweatpants for the colder days. Just as he was about to go to the checkout counter, he noticed another display shelf, filled with athletic underwear. 

He didn't really have a use for socks, since going bare foot sounded much more appealing in this hot summer, but what caught his eye was the wide selection of jockstraps. Marvin would really never have considered wearing one of these, but why not? He could very well imagine them looking good on him. His hand hovered over the selection before he grabbed a pack, acting on an impulse. Normally, he wore S-sized underwear, sometimes M, but he grabbed the XL pack. Thinking about it, he also took an XXL one. He didn't know why he did that, after all, you don't just grow two or three underwear sizes over night, but it felt right enough for him and thinking was difficult today, anyways.

Marvin paid and made his way back to the dorm.

Meanwhile, Aiden had also returned from his classes and entered the dorm room. Instinctively, once he entered, he took a deep breath. The air in the room had a familiar aroma, one that Aiden enjoyed quite a lot. He took another deep breath and felt his cock twitch in response.

Kicking off his shoes and socks, Aiden flopped to his bed. In theory, he should be working on understanding todays lectures so he would be able to follow the next ones. However, that sounded really stressful, and he just didn't want to. Instead, he wanted to relax a bit. Yes, that sounded better.

He got rid of his shirt and pants, chilling in his boxers that were also beginning to emit a ripe smell after three days of wear. He scratched the medium dense forest of hair and marveled at his way bulkier physique meanwhile. He was by no means athletic or lean, but he wasn't fat either. It was just a good mixture.

Speaking of fat, Aiden got out a sandwich he bought on the way and started to quickly devour it. He was starving! The sandwich tasted great and helped his hunger. Once he was done, he let the wrapping just fall to the floor, giving it no further attention. His greasy hands however were wiped off on his boxers and his chest hair. 

That's the life, Aiden thought. The forest under his armpits was emitting a pleasant smell again and his dick was wanting for attention again. Just as he had fished it out however, and started with one or two slow strokes, there was a knock on the door. 

Sighing, Aiden stuffed his erect cock back into his boxers, not caring about the rather obvious bulge and opened the door, just clad in his dirty boxers.

On the other side of the door was another young man, wearing a hoodie. He looked left and right before addressing Aiden in a low voice:

"Hey man, what's up?"

Aiden nodded in a friendly way and asked: "Not much. What about you?"

"I'm Zach", said the other man. "You're new here, right?"

Aiden nodded. "Yeah, just moved in yesterday."

"Cool. Listen, man, I'm an entrepreneur of sorts, and I've made some sweat deals with guys in this room before. So, I just wanted to introduce myself and give you a quick welcome gift."

Zach pulled out a plastic bag and gave it to Aiden, who automatically grabbed the item. "Completely free. If you want more later, I also left my number in the bag, just shoot me a message. I'll give you a fair price." Zach smiled. "Alright, got to go. Nice meeting you!"

With that, Zach hurried away, leaving Aiden with the plastic bag in his hand.

When he returned to his room and sat back on his bed, he looked at what he had just received. Inside the bag were three already rolled up joints, smelling strongly of Marihuana as well as a slip of paper with a mobile number. 

That guy was a drug dealer! Aiden was feeling unwell. Should he report him somewhere? The police? Campus administration?

On the other hand, Zach hadn't seemed like a bad guy. And, although Aiden had never taken drugs, he was pretty sure weed was considered one of the most harmless ones. Perhaps selling that wasn't that bad.

Still, Aiden didn't know what to do with the plastic bag. He certainly wouldn't use the drugs, that much was sure. He couldn't very well dispose of it, either, though, because... it was too much trouble devising a plan to safely do so.

So, Aiden just put the bag into his nightstand and closed the drawer. There. Problem solved.

Now, he could finally get back to relaxing. Lying down on his bed again, he freed his python from its proverbial cage and with one or two quick tugs, made it hard again.

No need to rush it, he figured, as he slowly stroked his length up and down. Probably from the whole lot of training he gave it recently, his cock looked somewhat bigger than what he was used to. Not too big, but definitely nothing to be ashamed of.

For the next ten minutes, Aiden idly played with himself while relaxing in bed. He was just about to increase the speed of his strokes, when suddenly, the door to the room swung open without warning and Marvin entered.

He froze when he saw Aiden, dick in hand, but not letting go of it, creating a moment of silence between the two men.

"Uhm, sorry?" Marvin finally said and closed the door behind him.

Aiden's first impulse was to quickly hide what he was doing, but that really seemed like too much of a hassle. They were roommates, it was only a matter of time they caught each other jerking off, so he just looked at Marvin and continued to slowly move his hand up and down his cock.

"That's alright", Aiden answered and slowly stroked on his dick with the same leisurely pace.

Marvin felt awkward. How was he supposed to react to that? Should he just leave? It wasn't helping that his own dick, still contained in the much too small underwear was growing hard rapidly at the sight. It had been ages since he had some release down there, and for some reason, seeing Aiden's mostly naked, hairy body turned him on a lot. Even the stinky air in the room or the smell emanating from Aiden wasn't bad. He just looked so natural like this, completely natural and unashamed.

"Can I watch?" Marvin blurted out before he even knew what he was saying.

"Watch?" Aiden asked, briefly stopping to look at Marvin. What an odd request, but whatever. "Sure. You can also jerk off, too, you look like you need it." Aiden said, nodding towards the very obvious tent in Marvin's shorts.

Marvin blushed heavily. "Uhm, that's not... I mean, I didn't want..."

Aiden laughed. "It's fine. Don't worry, I'll just keep going."

Marvin hesitated for a moment longer but then quickly shed his pants and underwear as well, stepping out of them. Now, he stood naked in front of Aiden, except for the sweat stained shirt. He quickly pulled that over his head as well and closed his hand around his dick, moaning at the touch. For some reason, his eyes were fixed on Aiden, as he pumped away on his cock in earnest. 

Aiden himself didn't mind Marvin standing there. The other man had some body hair as well, but not nearly as much as Aiden had by now. The deep tan, broad shoulders and dancing muscles however, not to mention the large dick Marvin had, didn't look bad at all, quite the obvious. Aiden felt himself watching the beads of sweat rolling down the other man's body before disappearing into his pubic bush.

Aiden turned his attention back to his own cock. His hand was going faster and faster on it, and he was already close. With a stifled moan, he came hard in his own hand, pumping more and more cum into it and smearing it all over his upper body.

Marvin grunted in a deep voice, deeper than his usual articulation. This was all so surreal, and yet, so incredibly arousing. Aiden was so hairy, and so stinky, and the added mass he had suited him so well. Marvin's hips thrust into his own hand, as he continued to fuck his hand, still standing in a wide stance in the middle of the room. As Aiden came, Marvin couldn't hold back any longer. With a cry that probably could be heard on the whole floor, he came as well, spewing large amounts of cum out of his large dick. Naturally, the spunk followed the direction in which he was looking and hit Aiden in the chest and face, adding to his own.

It did take Marvin a moment to catch his breath, as he finally sat down on his own bed.

"Sorry." He said to the cum-covered Aiden. Weird. His voice was still deep, at least an octave deeper than what he was used to.

"Don't worry about it." Aiden smiled and wiped his face with his discarded shirt while spreading the stuff on his chest with his hand. "Looks like you had fun, big guy. We can do this again any time."

"Yeah..." Marvin said, really spent. "But now, it's time for bed."

Bathing in the afterglow, Marvin turned sideways and quickly slumbered away.

The plot thickens... and so does the amount of... glue... on Aiden's body. Here you can read the previous part. The final part can be read here.

[xxbirkindoll]

ok for a drew fic maybe you and drew are new parents and he’s all snappy cause it’s frustrating and he apologizes later that night or something idk it’s been on my mind a lot

Together

A/N: i wrote this last night and i was tired so i hope it’s not that bad. i tried my best

warnings: none just angst and fluff at the end

words: 1.9k

——

The atmosphere inside inside the house feels anything but bright. The soft, rhythmic sound of your baby girl’s breathing is the only thing that calms you as you sit on the edge of the bed in the guest room. It’s quiet here, tucked away from the rest of the house, away from Drew.

You’ve been in here for hours, ever since his harsh words had cut through you like a knife, leaving you stunned and hurt. You hadn’t expected it, hadn’t seen it coming. It wasn’t just what he said—it was how he said it, the sharpness in his tone, the frustration that seemed to boil over into anger, directed at you when all you were trying to do was hold everything together.

“She won’t stop crying, Y/N! Can’t you just do something?” he’d snapped, his voice loud enough to startle the baby in your arms. Her cries had only gotten louder, and your heart had broken a little more with every word that came out of his mouth.

It wasn’t fair. None of this was fair. You were both exhausted, both overwhelmed, but you were supposed to be in this together. You were supposed to be a team. And yet, when things got tough, instead of leaning on each other, it felt like he was pushing you away, like you were failing him somehow.

You’d had enough. You’d left the living room without a word, carrying your daughter with you as you retreated to the guest room. You didn’t even look back to see if Drew was following. You couldn’t bear to see the frustration on his face, couldn’t handle the way his anger made you feel like you were completely alone in this.

The day passes slowly, each hour dragging on as you do your best to take care of your baby while keeping your distance from Drew. You hear him moving around the house, but he doesn’t come near the guest room. You’re not sure if he’s giving you space because he knows he crossed a line, or if he’s just too wrapped up in his own frustration to care. Either way, it hurts.

You spend most of the day in a haze, your emotions raw and close to the surface. You’re exhausted, both physically and emotionally, and it’s all you can do to keep going. You feed the baby, change her, rock her to sleep when she gets fussy, but your mind keeps drifting back to Drew, to the way he snapped at you, the way he made you feel like you weren’t doing enough.

By the time evening rolls around, you’re completely drained. You’ve barely eaten, barely slept, and your nerves are frayed to the point of breaking. The baby is finally asleep in the bassinet beside the bed, and you’re sitting there, staring at the wall, trying to hold back the tears that have been threatening to spill over all day.

And then there’s a soft knock on the door.

You don’t respond at first, hoping that whoever it is will just go away. But the knock comes again, a little louder this time, and you know it’s Drew. You can feel his presence even before he speaks, can sense the tension in the air as he waits for you to answer.

“Y/N?” His voice is soft, hesitant, and it only makes the ache in your chest worse. “Can I come in?”

You stay silent, not sure if you even want to see him right now. Part of you wants to open the door, let him in, let him apologize, but another part of you is still too hurt, too angry to even look at him.

“Please,” he says after a moment, his voice breaking slightly. “I need to talk to you.”

You close your eyes, taking a deep breath as you try to calm the storm of emotions swirling inside you. Finally, after what feels like an eternity, you get up and walk to the door, opening it just enough to see him standing there, looking more tired than you’ve ever seen him.

His eyes are red-rimmed, his face pale, and there’s a desperation in his expression that tugs at your heart even though you’re still angry. He looks like he hasn’t slept in days, like the weight of everything is finally crashing down on him.

“I’m sorry,” he says immediately, his voice thick with emotion. “Y/N, I’m so, so sorry. I didn’t mean to snap at you. I was frustrated and tired, but that’s no excuse. You’re doing everything you can, and I shouldn’t have taken my anger out on you.”

You stay silent, watching him as he steps closer, his hands trembling slightly as he reaches out to you. He doesn’t touch you, just holds his hands out, like he’s waiting for you to decide whether or not to let him in.

“I’m an idiot,” he continues when you don’t say anything, his voice trembling. “I know I am. I’ve been walking around all day thinking about what I said, about how I made you feel, and I hate myself for it. You’ve been amazing, Y/N, and I’ve been a jerk. I should have been supporting you, not tearing you down. I don’t deserve you.”

You can see the sincerity in his eyes, the regret that’s written all over his face, and it makes your heart ache. But you’re still so hurt, so angry that he would snap at you like that, especially when you’re both going through the same thing.

“I didn’t know what to do,” you finally whisper, your voice shaking as you struggle to keep your emotions in check. “I’m trying so hard, Drew. I’m doing everything I can, and it’s still not enough. And then you yelled at me like I was the one failing. Do you know how that made me feel?”

He closes his eyes, a pained expression crossing his face. “I know,” he says quietly, his voice filled with regret. “I know, and I hate myself for it. You didn’t deserve that. You’re an amazing mother, Y/N. You’re doing everything right. I was just…” He pauses, taking a shaky breath. “I was just scared. I felt so helpless, and instead of dealing with that, I took it out on you. And I’m so sorry.”

You stare at him for a long moment, your heart torn between the pain he caused and the love you still feel for him. He looks so broken, so desperate for your forgiveness, and you can see that he means every word. He knows he messed up, and he’s trying to make it right.

Finally, you let out a sigh, your shoulders slumping as the last of your anger starts to fade. “You really hurt me, Drew,” you say softly, your voice trembling. “I needed you, and instead of being there for me, you pushed me away.”

“I know,” he whispers, his voice thick with guilt. “I know, and I’m so sorry, Y/N. I’ll do anything to make it up to you. Just… please don’t shut me out.”

For a long moment, you don’t say anything, just looking at him, trying to decide if you’re ready to forgive him, if you’re ready to let go of the hurt and let him back in. And then, finally, you take a step forward, reaching out to him.

He’s on you in an instant, pulling you into his arms, holding you tightly as if he’s afraid you might slip away. You can feel the tension in his body, the way he’s trembling slightly as he holds you, and it makes you realize just how scared he’s been, just how much he’s been hurting too.

“I love you,” he whispers into your hair, his voice thick with emotion. “I love you so much, baby. I’m so sorry for what I said. You’re everything to me. Please forgive me.”

You close your eyes, letting yourself sink into his embrace, letting his warmth and his love surround you. “I love you too,” you whisper back, your voice barely audible. “But you can’t talk to me like that again, Drew. We’re supposed to be in this together.”

“We are,” he promises, pulling back just enough to look into your eyes. “We are, and I’ll do better. I promise, Y/N. I’ll be better.”

You nod, feeling a tear slip down your cheek as the last of your anger fades away, leaving only the love you have for him. He wipes the tear away with his thumb, his touch gentle, and then leans down to press a soft kiss to your lips, a kiss filled with all the love and regret he’s been holding inside.

When he pulls back, there’s a small, hopeful smile on his face, and it makes your heart swell with affection. “Come back to our room,” he says softly, his voice almost pleading. “I don’t want to sleep without you. I don’t want to be apart anymore.”

You hesitate for a moment, looking back at the bassinet where your daughter is sleeping peacefully, but then you nod, taking his hand. “Okay,” you whisper, letting him lead you back to your room.

The house is quiet as you walk through the halls, the weight of the day’s emotions starting to lift as you return to the familiarity of your shared space. Drew doesn’t let go of your hand the entire time, holding onto you like you’re his lifeline, like he’s afraid to let you go.

When you reach your bedroom, he pulls you into his arms again, kissing you deeply, as if trying to convey all the things he couldn’t say earlier. And you kiss him back, letting yourself get lost in the warmth of his embrace, the comfort of knowing that despite everything, you’re still in this together.

Finally, he pulls back, resting his forehead against yours as he takes a deep breath. “I’m going to do better, Y/N,” he whispers, his voice filled with determination. “I’m going to be the partner you deserve. I’m going to be here for you, no matter what.”

You smile, a soft, tired smile, but one filled with hope. “We’ll figure it out,” you say softly, cupping his cheek with your hand. “Together.”

“Together,” he echoes, pressing a kiss to your forehead before leading you to the bed.

You both climb in, the exhaustion of the day finally catching up to you as you snuggle under the covers. Drew pulls you close, his arms wrapping around you as he holds you tightly, like he never wants to let you go.

And as you lay there, feeling the steady rise and fall of his chest, the warmth of his body against yours, you feel a sense of peace that you haven’t felt in days. The road ahead might still be difficult, but you know that you’re not alone, that you have each other, and that’s all that matters.

“I love you,” Drew whispers again, his voice barely audible as he starts to drift off to sleep.

“I love you too,” you whisper back, closing your eyes and letting yourself finally relax, finally let go of the day’s tension.

As you fall asleep in his arms, you can’t help but feel a sense of hope, a sense that no matter what challenges come your way, you’ll be able to face them together.

——

ps: i have another drew fic coming soon get ready

[izvmimi]

cw: fluff. one somewhat violent joke. reader and izuku are married.

It’s not that Izuku doesn’t treat you well - in fact, so well that sometimes it makes you antsy, like a dream that you’ve yet to wake up from - but the nagging sense that something is horribly wrong tears at you as you find the maître d stand of one of the swankiest restaurants in town. You’re still in work attire, having been asked by a text that was a little too somber to meet him at this exact location right after work.

This, on top of a Hey, can we talk today? I love you <3 text, is almost too much to bear.

Before you can be brought to your table, you can see your hapless husband at a table in the corner of the restaurant that appears somewhat deserted for privacy, sporting a smile on his face as he stands up and waves in your direction. He too, is still in work attire, his tie just slightly loosened, either to relax or because he was incessantly pulling at his neck like a nervous puppy as he waited for you. You can sense a little anxiety behind his smile - only you would be able to notice this - and thank the host as Izuku pulls out your chair for you before the host can do it, and then proceeds to tell you about the menu.

This is the first time you’ve seen Izuku since yesterday morning, when you both parted ways for work. Izuku had worked late and you’d fallen asleep before he’d come back; you slept in planning to open the clinic later today, noting that he was gone before you opened your eyes. 

Not without an I love you whispered into your ear with a forehead kiss you barely remember.

And yet, despite the fact that your husband loves you terribly, you’re suddenly very anxious.

Once you’ve ordered sparkling waters and cocktails, you finally lean in, unable to handle the suspense any longer.

“What’s going on, Izuku?”

Izuku looks uncharacteristically unsettled when you’re finally looking at him directly like this, and you notice his hands are not relaxed, hidden below the table. You wonder if he’s making nervous gestures with his fingers. You don’t like that at all.

“How about we get appetizers first?” he asks. “Are you hungry?”

He reaches for a piece of bread and butters it before attempting to hand feed it to you, and you give him a sharp look, but open your mouth regardless to accept it.

“What’s going on? You’re scaring the shit out of me,” you say between bites. He takes a bite of his own food, then looks around. Still abnormally skittish, you find yourself tensing up.

“Izuku…” you whisper under your breath. He gives you an appeasing smile, bigger still when the waiter shows up again with your drinks.

He waits until you take a sip of your drink first before reaching his right hand over on the table.  You’re hesitant to let him hold it, but you haven’t held hands in over 24 hours so you let him take it. A deep breath is let out from both of you in unison.

“So I have to tell you something-”

You genuinely feel your asshole tighten but you don’t let go. Izuku’s eyes are very serious now, eyebrows furrowed, and green eyes with nearly the same glow as you’ve seen before when he starts to use OFA.

“Don’t get mad at me. Please.”

You’re already mad. In fact, your heart is racing. 

This is it. He’s cheating on you. He’s moving to another country. Something messed up with your marriage certificate and you actually never got married and due to some loophole there’s an annulment clause that’s required to save a hundred children trapped in a glacier in Antartica. There’s an alien invasion and he has to deal with it. Maybe he’s pregnant. Maybe-

“So I lost my wedding band."

Your eyes widen and he recoils, a frown on his face. Scratching his head with his other hand, the left hand that is scarred and devoid of any wedding band, he looks genuinely distressed.

“I spent literally all of last night trying to find it, I think whatever quirk this guy used on me last night must have somehow managed to loosen it off my finger, and then I was so embarrassed coming home I didn’t want to risk telling you-” he pauses, and looks up again to check your reaction. You’re still frozen stiff, and he quickly holds both of your hands.

“Listen, I’ll get us a new set, and we’ll engrave them. We can even have another ceremony if you like. I am so, so, so sorry, honey, I didn’t think this would ever happen and I know you warned me not to go on patrol with it on, but it feels wrong to leave it at home and-”

“Izuku.”

He falls silent, and you pull your hand away gently. You can see him go absolutely pale, but you lean back into your chair, and finally let out the loudest sigh of relief.

“I thought I’d have to stab you.”

Izuku blinks.

“What?”

You sigh again, then start laughing, beginning with a short chuckle and then until you’re full blown giggling, watching his confused and disturbed face as he looks at you, then at the butter knife that is a little too within reach.

“What…”

Your laugh is nearly raucous now as if you were a madwoman.

“I was literally trying to figure out how much force I would need to get through that meaty chest of yours, this is truly so funny.”

Izuku pouts which only makes you giggle harder. Practically doubled over, you nearly laugh to tears, only to see that he doesn’t find it funny in the least.

“How is this funny?” he asks.

His arms are crossed over the aforementioned meaty chest, and the cute way with which he pouts only warms your heart.

“I imagined no less than 10 awful scenarios, and you’re here buttering me up because you think I’ll be mad you lost a piece of metal?”

He nearly clutches his pearls.

“A piece of metal?”

You nod, then smile, wiping your tears of laughter away.

“Even if you lost that very finger with the ring, you’d still be mine and I’d still be yours, as long as you wanted to be,” you insist. “I was so afraid you didn’t want to be anymore.”

He ponders for a moment, then looks at you. Reaching out for your hand, he squeezes it tightly then kisses it, once over your wedding band, and then once over the back of your hand.

“I guess I worried for nothing.”

You smile at him.

“So did I, clearly,” you offer. He lets out a sigh of relief as do you, then pulls you in for a kiss. Your waiter, impeccable timing clearly, shows up and clears his throat gently as you draw apart.

“Anything you want from the menu?”

You resettle yourself and your emotions, looking at your ridiculously sweet husband across the table again, remembering decidedly that he is not on the menu, then remember you haven’t looked at it at all.

As if Izuku reads your mind with a glance, he asks, 

“More time, please?”

If the waiter could roll his eyes, he would, and you don’t blame him, but he’s polite when he steps away to give you the time to stop wasting his time.

As soon as the waiter is out of sight, Izuku looks at you again, mischief in his eye.

“What about matching tattoo rings?”

You scrunch your mouth to the side.

“Perhaps cheesy…”

He frowns.

“But…” you start, dipping bread in seasoned oil and raising it to his lips. He bites and smiles at you, chewing.

“I’ll consider it, my love.”

[sp6ncers]

sunday morning — s reid

summary: reader is struggling on the anniversary of her trauma and spencer tries to comfort her.

spencer reid x fem! reader. angst, fluff? spencer's pov, 2nd person.

song: sunday morning by ethel cain

warnings/content: depression, trauma/ptsd, mentions of abuse & sexual assault (past), self deprecating talk from reader, hurt/comfort, established relationship, pet names (baby, sweetheart, sweet girl, angel), non-sexual showering together, allusions to self harm but not really

wc: ~ 2.8k

author's note : hai !! this is my first tumblr fic so pls bare with me while i figure out how everything on this app works 😭 this is a very self indulgent & angsty fic because idk i just wanted to write it to make me feel better about some stuff that happened to me lolol anyway i hope u enjoy & any feedback is appreciated !!! 💞

Spencer is drinking coffee at the kitchen table, a book settled in his hands, when you drag yourself out of the bedroom. His gaze flits away from the book, falling onto your dishevelled form. You don't even look up at him, your eyes staying low as you trudge towards the bathroom, feet dragging on the floor.

His eyebrows furrow in concern, his worried gaze following your journey until the door shuts. The faint click of the lock sounds in the otherwise quiet apartment. Sliding a bookmark into place, Spencer closes his book and sets it down on the table.

He tries to think logically. Maybe you're just tired. That's a simple, normal explanation. It's not like you'd even done anything to show that something is wrong — yet his gut still tells him that. He's a profiler, after all. He's trained to read body language. And the way you had held yourself as you had passed through was a clear sign of distress.

After a few minutes, you emerge from the bathroom, your eyes somehow even more tired than before. Again, you don't look at him, and his concern only grows.

"Good morning, angel," Spencer says gently, his voice soft and almost cautious.

He gets a barely audible hum of acknowledgment and nothing more as you disappear back into the bedroom, shoulders slumped.

Worry gnaws on his bones with its sharp teeth, making his legs feel weak as he stands up and crosses the apartment to the bedroom. His knuckles tap gently against the slightly open door as he slowly pushes it wider. His eyes fall on your form, curled up small beneath the covers which rise and fall in time with your slow breathing.

Quietly, his voice barely above a whisper, he says your name. But you don't answer.

Spencer knows your struggle with depression; he's known since the third date the two of you went on. He has always been there for you, good days and bad, and he has always been patient and gentle and understanding. He knows what it's like to be stuck in your own mind, bad thoughts like a cage around you. But he's never seen you like this before.

In the time that you have been together — and the two months living with each other — he's witnessed your mental health worsen and become better. He's been by your side when you've had breakdowns and couldn't even leave your apartment. He's researched every possible way to help you feel better. He's done all he could to help you.

But what he's never seen is you so deeply distressed that you can't even say hi to him. Every morning, no matter what, you say hi, or good morning, or ask how he slept. But not today. It worries him, a deep pit forming in his stomach and swallowing him whole.

Carefully, he makes his way over to the bed and sits on the edge. The dip of the mattress beneath his weight makes you look up. He notices the redness in your eyes and the exhaustion on your face. Had you slept at all last night?

"Hey," Spencer says quietly, shifting to sit beside you. "Are you feeling okay?"

You're quiet for a few moments, and he wonders if you just don't feel like speaking today. Of course, that would be fine with him, but he'd much prefer to hear your voice.

"I'm okay," you respond, but the crack in your voice tells him otherwise.

"You sure?" he asks gently. He knows that if he asks if you're sure, you'll tell him you're not really okay. That's how it always goes. He doesn't mind it, but he always wishes you'd just tell him the first time he asks.

The room falls quiet as you push yourself into a sitting position, your back against the headboard. His eyes trace over your face and body language, taking note of the way you wrap your arms around yourself in an almost protective way. Your eyes glisten with unshed tears, red-rimmed, the dark bags beneath them prominent. The soft light filtering through the curtains shines against your damp cheeks; it would be beautiful if you weren't so upset. His heart aches, hating how utterly sad and distressed you look. He wants to take away all your pain and bury it in himself rather than in you. He would so much rather be the one suffering with whatever is bothering you than have to see you like this.

Your bottom lip quivers as you manage to force out the word, "No."

Eyes softening, he watches as you sniffle and bring your hands to your face, pressing your palms into your eyes. "What's wrong, baby? Did something happen?" he asks softly. "Or is it just a bad day today?"

You shake your head, wiping your hands down your face as tears begin to fall once again. You take a deep, shaky breath before speaking, your body shuddering as you let the breath out. "No— no, it... it, um..."

You can't seem to put your thoughts into words, your sentences fragmented and unsure. Spencer reaches out a gentle hand, resting it on your shoulder to test the waters. When you don't shy away from his touch, he wraps an arm around you, pulling you close as his other hand comes up to your hair.

"It's okay, sweetheart. Take your time."

Another deep breath, your body trembling in his embrace as you turn to bury your face against him. He doesn't mind that your tears are soaking through his shirt. He just wants to make you feel better.

"It's..." You don't finish your sentence, instead letting out a quiet sob that breaks Spencer's heart.

Of course, he's seen you cry before. But it's never been this bad. He hates the feelings that build within him, the feeling of helplessness, of being unable to do anything to make you feel better. His mind feels fuzzy, but he knows that's nothing compared to what you must be feeling. He can't even imagine what's going on inside your head right now. Instead of speaking, instead of rushing you to open up, he simply holds you tighter, rubbing your back in what he hopes is a soothing motion.

The way your body shudders against him with each shaky breath and gasping sob makes him feel sick. He wishes there was something he could do to make you feel better, but all he can think of is to just hold you close.

"I— I'm sorry," you whisper, your voice shaky and breathless.

His eyebrows furrow at your apology. Shaking his head, Spencer holds you tighter. "Why are you sorry?"

He feels the movement of your shrug as you bury yourself further against him. "I'm being stupid," you mumble, your words followed by another pained sob, the sound muffled against him.

"You're not being stupid, angel. Not at all," he assures you. "Whatever is making you feel like this isn't stupid. If it's upsetting you this much, it is not stupid, okay?"

A quiet sound, something akin to a whimper, escapes your lips as you bunch up his shirt in your fists. He knows you need something to ground you. He would let you rip his shirt to shreds if you needed to.

"I want to help you," Spencer continues softly, his hand rubbing slowly over your back. "I want to help you feel better, sweetheart. Can you tell me what's upsetting you, please?"

He doesn't mean to rush you — that's not something he would ever want to do. All he wants is to find out why you're feeling this way and what he can do to help. Seeing you like this, so hurt and broken, is destroying him. It's like a mould, creeping through his body and over each inch of him until his entire being aches.

You hesitate for a few moments, sniffling softly as you pull yourself away from where you had burrowed into his chest. Your hands are harsh as you wipe the tears from your face, fingers digging into your skin. Spencer gently takes your hands in his, pulling them away from your face to prevent you from hurting yourself.

"Hey, don't do that, please," he says gently, holding your hands in his lap and rubbing his thumb over your knuckles. "I'm right here, okay? You can take as long as you need, but I'd really like to know what has you feeling like this, baby."

The breath you take in is deep and shaky, your body trembling as you sniffle. He reaches up one of his hands, cupping your cheek and gently wiping away your tears. "I love you, my sweet girl. So much. You can tell me anything, okay?"

Nodding, you lean your face into his palm and take a shaky breath. He watches you carefully, his thumb tenderly stroking over your cheek to comfort you. He knows that what you need to say won't be easy, not at all, and he knows you need a few moments to prepare yourself to say it. He waits quietly, patiently, listening to the shuddering breaths you take.

After a few moments, you finally speak. "Two years ago... I, um..."

You speak hesitantly, stumbling over your words as you try to get it out. Spencer's hand slips away from your face, trailing down your arm to hold your hand again. Giving your hand a reassuring squeeze, he stays silent to let you get this out.

"I was..." You trail off, swallowing nervously. After taking a deep breath, you wipe away your tears and attempt to continue. "I was in a relationship with a guy. He— he wasn't really, um, a good person."

The way you say it makes him nervous; his mind immediately goes to the worst possible places. He gives you another gentle squeeze, his other hand reaching up to carefully tuck your hair away from your damp, tearstained face. His touch is delicate and gentle, hoping he makes you feel better. You've barely even started explaining, but he feels his heart pounding and his throat growing tight with worry.

"We had been together for a— a few months, and... He'd, um, recently started getting kinda... I don't know. He— he'd started saying weird stuff and—"

You cut yourself off with a sniffle, blinking back more tears. Spencer can't imagine how hard this must be for you. His head is a mess, trapped somewhere between unfathomable worry and empathy for you, and anger at the fact that someone had hurt you so badly. He chews on his lip to stop himself from speaking as you brokenly explain what had happened on this day two years ago. His stomach twists, a nauseous feeling rising in his chest as you tell him how that man had violated your boundaries and ignored your protests to what he was doing. Each word is like a knife plunging into his chest, over and over and over. Each hurt little whimper as you recall the story breaks his heart further.

"He—" You sniffle again, blinking harshly as tears paint your skin. "I'm sorry," you mumble, wiping away your tears on your sleeve.

"Don't apologise," Spencer replies gently with a shake of his head as he gives your hand a squeeze. "Take your time, sweetheart."

Taking another trembling breath, you continue in a quiet, broken voice. "There were... there were bruises where h-he had grabbed me. It— it was like a reminder of what happened. I— I know that I should've... I should've ended things before it got that far, but I..." Your voice trails off. He knows what you mean. He's studied human behaviour enough to understand how abusive and manipulative relationships affect someone, making it difficult to leave.

"I just... I didn't know how. And— and I didn't really have anyone to— to go to," you murmur. "And I know... I know it's stupid to still be upset about it... But I just... I can still f-feel his hands on me, and— and I hate it. I— I can't get him off. Please get him off."

Your face crumples as you end your sentence with a sob, your shoulders shuddering. He carefully pulls you back into him, resting your head against his chest. One hand strokes your hair as the other securely wraps around you in the way he knows makes you feel better. His heart is in pieces, completely broken from what you'd told him. You haven't given him too much detail — he doesn't expect you to do that — but what you've said is enough for him to understand. He understands what happened is horrible, and awful, and sickening. He understands that you feel like you can't cleanse yourself from that awful man's touch. He understands that you might still be scared of your trust being broken again.

"It's okay," Spencer whispers, kissing the top of your head. "It isn't stupid to be upset. It's rational. It's normal. What happened to you was terrible, and I am so, so sorry you had to go through that, angel. I hope you know that it wasn't your fault. At all. And I promise you — I promise — you are safe with me."

You sniffle softly, and he can tell you're trying to control your shaky breathing. He continues to gently stroke your hair as his thumb rubs small circles on your waist through the fabric of your sweater. You shift against him, your fist rubbing at your eye.

"I'll never let anything like that happen to you ever again. I promise," he tells you softly, his voice sincere. He really hopes you know that he would never even think of doing that to you, but he understands that you might still be wary. "I love you more than anything."

It's quiet for a few minutes, the only sounds being your trembling breaths and occasional sniffles. He continues to hold you against him, trying to bring you comfort. He's glad you told him, and he hopes that you feel better now that you have, at least a little bit. His mind is a mess of emotions, but right now he just wants to focus on helping you calm down. He can deal with his own thoughts once he knows that you're okay. Sure, that isn't exactly a healthy way to deal with things, but he doesn't know what else there is to do.

"Everything hurts," you murmur, your voice muffled against him. He's not exactly sure what you mean, whether you're physically in pain or if it's just emotional turmoil, but either way, he wants to help.

"Do you want me to run you a shower?" he asks quietly. "Or get you a drink? Breakfast?"

"Shower," you whisper, your voice slightly hoarse from crying. "Please."

"Of course. Stay here."

Spencer carefully removes his arms from around you, his lips ghosting over your forehead in a soft kiss as he stands up. Heading into the bathroom, he turns on the shower and heats it up to the temperature he knows you like. After turning on the radiator and setting a towel on top to warm up, he walks back into the bedroom to find you looking much more calm than before. Giving you a gentle smile, he takes your hand and helps you up off the bed, guiding you into the bathroom.

Not wanting to overstep or make you uncomfortable, he asks, "Do you want me to stay?"

"Please," you respond softly with a nod.

"Okay," he replies, his voice barely above a whisper. "Should I come in with you, or—"

You give another nod in response before he can even finish the question. Slowly, tenderly, he helps you undress, taking note of the reddish marks on your skin. He assumes they're from where you showered yesterday and desperately tried to cleanse yourself of your ex's touch, your hands harsh and uncaring as you had scrubbed at your skin. His chest feels tight at the thought.

Following suit and undressing himself, he guides you into the shower so that you're standing beneath the warm spray of water. His touch is gentle and caring as he washes your hair the way you'd taught him. He makes sure you're okay before washing your body. Whispering quiet reassurances to you, Spencer rinses the soap suds from your skin and lets you wash his hair with a soft smile on his face. Once you're both finished, he pulls you into his arms and rests his chin on the top of your head.

"Except you," you murmur, and he almost doesn't hear it over the sound of the shower.

"Hm?" he hums, not sure what you mean.

"Everything hurts, except from you."

[holylulusworld]

Christmas Together

Summary: You share your first Christmas with Clark.

Pairing: Clark Kent x fem!Reader

Warnings: shy reader, Christmas fluff, fluff, mentions of sex

Catch up here: Alone again - Naturally, Not alone any longer & Together alone

Six months after your last encounter with Lois, you feel—you can’t even describe how you feel. At least, not with a single word. Free. Happy. Valued. Desired. Loved.

The first time you made love, Clark was almost shy.

Both of you touch-starved, you spend hours with kisses and exploring each other’s bodies before he sinks into you. He was gentle yet passionate.

The moment you scratched his back and begged him to make you his, Clark became possessive. He didn’t stop until you came for a third time and passed out on him.

From that night on, you never slept without Clark by your side. When he asked you only three weeks later to move in with him, you didn’t hesitate. You didn’t know why, but you felt like you belonged for the first time in your life.

Clark had this large farm, waiting for you to bring life to it. His mother moved away years back, too sad about the loss of her beloved husband.

It wasn’t too complicated for him to fly back to Metropolis in the blink of an eye to be on time for work. Your boss at the online magazine didn’t care where you were working from. A stable internet connection and your laptop were all you needed to keep your job.

In only a few months, you made a home out of the deserted place. A dog and a cat joined your and Clark’s life soon after you moved into the farmhouse.

Clark named the dog Krypto, and you named the cat Streaky. You chuckled at your choice, but you kind of liked that their names were extraordinary like your boyfriend's.

“Krypto, how about we go for a walk?” You call for your dog. You’re done with work this week. Clark is still in Metropolis, working on an important article. “We can decorate the house some more later. Clark wants to get the tree with us.”

Krypto barks at the cat before pouncing on you to lick your face. He jumps up at you, licking and kissing your face.

“Krypto, no,” you giggle and laugh. “We can cuddle later. You need to go for a walk. No more peeing into the kitchen.”

Krypto whines. Somehow, he understands that he did something wrong. “Aw, it’s alright. You are still a puppy. Let’s go outside before it gets colder again. We don’t want you to freeze, puppy.”

“Cold, cold,” you whine as your teeth shatter. Krypto ran off, and you had to chase him through the snow. Now you feel like a living popsicle and barely feel your feet and hands. “So cold…”

“Blossom?” You want to get up when you hear Clark enter the house, but you’re too cold. Wrapping the blanket tighter around your body, you snuggle with Krypto and Streaky in front of the fireplace in the living room. “Y/N, are you alright?”

A swoosh of air makes you shudder. You’re used to Clark appearing next to you out of nowhere. He looks at you and sits in front of the fireplace. “What happened?”

“Krypto ran, and I had to chase him. It’s cold outside,” you whine. “Really cold, Clarkie. We should never leave the house in winter.”

He laughs at your words but crouches down to kiss your cheek. “What about the tree we wanted to get?”

“Uh—it’s so cold,” you murmur. “Can we not get it later? Much later. After we had hot tea and an even hotter bath?”

“How about you wear your warmest clothes and watch me get one from the front porch? It won’t take me long, and we can decorate it tomorrow. Together.”

Reluctantly, you get up. Before you can protest, you are in his arms, and his lips are on yours. “Hey there, Blossom.” He purrs against your lips before running upstairs with you. You giggle the whole way. “How was your day?”

“It was good,” you cup his face and kiss him again. “So, which tree do you want to get? Will you simply fly to Metropolis and buy one?”

“It’s a surprise,” he pecks your lips before putting you back on your feet. “Get dressed, and don’t forget the scarf and hand gloves. I want you to watch me.”

“Clark—what?” You gasp loudly. It’s nothing new to you that Clark is fast, strong, and can fly. But he just ripped a huge tree out of the ground. He flies toward you, the tree in his arms, as you cannot fathom that this man wants to be your boyfriend.

“I promised you the largest and most beautiful tree.” He gracefully lands on the front porch to show you the tree.

“Clark, there are roots on it,” you laugh while pointing at the roots. “We can’t put the tree up like this.”

“No problem.” He easily maneuvers the tree. Clark puts it on the ground as you watch him with curiosity. He uses his laser eye beam to cut the roots off, making you gasp. His powers are even more impressive up close. “All good. Now we can put it up.”

“It’s so pretty.” You jump at Clark and wrap your arms around him. “This is going to be the best Christmas ever.”

Clark nods against you. He feels the same. It’s going to be the best Christmas because he can spend it with you and the secret you’re carrying under your heart. The one you do not know about yet…

[wildestdreamsblog]

a one shot w jk and the one night stand scenario pls pls i beg 🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️ delulu levels r off the charts ever since ck

What he wants, he gets

Pairing: Jeon Jungkook x Reader (idol au)

Warnings: Soft Yandere, Obsessiveness, Possessiveness, If you’re not 18+ please, PLEASE, do not interact. Be mindful of the warnings. Let me know if I miss anything.

3000 celebration

‘Fuck,’ you mouthed as you looked down at your bare body covered only by a white sheet, and then slowly and horrifyingly turned to look at the man beside you. Your eyes widened even further, your heart beat faster as recognition dawned on your face.

Fuck, indeed.

You let your head fell back down on the pillow in frustration. You couldn’t even have the luxury of experiencing any onslaught of confusion about what happened the night before because you knew full well. The soreness in between your thighs and the marks you could see scattered on your chest were enough to tell you what shouldn’t have happened.

You blamed the alcohol.

You even blamed the man beside you.

But worst of all, you blamed yourself.

You meant, in the first place, why did you allow yourself to go out and drink and completely lost it?!

And of all the people you could have slept with, why on earth did you sleep with the Jeon Jungkook?!

God, you knew you had to leave before he even woke up. You couldn’t even begin to imagine how he would react when he saw you beside him. He would probably think you tricked him somehow.

With bated breath, you lifted the heavy arm filled with artistic tattoos. You carefully watched his face, taking note of the way he whined when you left his arm. He was frowning adorably before you place a pillow in his arm.

You looked down at his handsome face. His dark, luscious hair was like a halo in perfect contrast to the white pillow. His slightly agape lips looked as kissable as they did last night. Jeon Jungkook looked like a dark prince that stepped out of a fairytale. He looked like a dream with his innocent face and his eyes filled with childlike wonder, yet his sinful body told a different story.

Sadly, you had to leave the dream and wake up.

You just wished he didn’t recognize you.

With a small, bitter smile on your lips, you kissed his cheek softly. And with that, you left. In your haste, you unknowingly left behind your bracelet with your name engraved on the inside,

Three weeks passed and yet, the memory of your time with him was still deeply etched in your mind. The way he kept looking at you in secret, a shy smile gracing his lips, the way the colorful lights from the club reflected on him, the way he finally built the courage to walk to you- they were all living rent free in your mind. The marks he so delightfully left in your skin may have already faded, but you could still feel him. The way he was so shy when he approached you was so opposite to how he was when he was on stage. The way he laughed at your jokes was like music in your ears… and the way he looked at you with interest and shyness both glinting in his eyes made you pull him by his clothes to kiss him. You squeezed your eyes shut, willing yourself to forget. You have to if you were going to work with the group.

“Until when are you going to sulk, Jungkookie?” Jin asked the youngest maknae, his voice both worried and with a hint of sermon. Ever since he woke up hours later without you and with no trace of you except the bracelet you left behind, he felt angry. That was almost a month ago and everyone in the group could feel the shift in his mood and it was affecting them.

Jungkook was someone who was often laidback, someone who didn’t want to feel negative emotions. However, everyone knew he hated when he was being ignored and what you were doing was the highest form of neglect he had ever felt in his life.

“Until I see her again,” he answered quietly, his eyes focused on the bracelet he was wearing. It was tight on his wrist, but he didn’t care. This bracelet was the only information he had on you.

“Jungkook, you know we always give you everything you want. But we can’t give you her. Not when we don’t know anything about her except her first name,” Namjoon explained gently, his patience endless when it came to the golden maknae. He could see how you were able to affect Jungkook. This was the first time they saw him be attracted to someone, really attracted to someone.

Because if he wasn’t, he wouldn’t lose sleep over you. He wouldn’t go home to his hyungs with tears in his eyes saying he lost you. He wouldn’t still look for you if you were meaningless.

“You’ll find her, Jungkook. We’ll help you, okay? But now, we need you to focus in this meeting.”

The meeting ran long. It was both draining yet productive to the boys. After deciding to call it a day, Jungkook walked out of the room. His eyes were focused on his phone when he felt someone ran into him. His hand immediately went out to steady her.

The girl bowed down her head in apology, her hair covering her face as she refused to meet Jungkook’s doe eyes. He tilted his head, about to ask her if she was okay. His large hand was still touching her forearm when he caught her.

And he felt something he couldn’t name.

Your heart beat faster. It was just your luck to run into him when you thought you successfully evaded him the whole meeting. But there was no way he recognized you, right?

“Have..have we met before?” He asked in confusion, his voice deep as he tried to peek at your face.

“N-no,” you answered while shaking your head, your hair still carefully placed in front of you. Your eyes were now on his hand that was still touching you. Your eyes widened when you recognized that bracelet.

It was yours.

Why was he wearing that?

In your surprise, you looked up at his dark and beautiful eyes. And before he could even process anything, you were apologizing yet again and walking as fast as you could to the elevator without looking suspicious.

Jungkook turned his broad back on you, his brows furrowed as he tried to remember your features and where he saw you. It was merely a second, only full second that he got to see your face before you hid behind your hair again.

You really looked familiar.

You felt familiar.

Could you be-

“Y/N! Enjoy your weekend!”

You had just entered when your coworker saw you. She waved at you, unknowing about the chaos she created.

The elevator was closing when you looked up and saw Jungkook snapped his head to you. His eyes looked betrayed as recognition finally dawned on him.

It was you.

It was your name. With purpose, he ran to the elevator only for him to miss it by half a second. You slumped back to the wall. There was no way that he didn’t recognize you now, his face told you everything.

Fuck. He was fucking mad.

He was fuming mad. He probably thought that you took advantage of him, never minding that he was bigger and stronger than you.

But still, he was younger than you by almost two years. You closed your eyes, praying this was all a bad dream. But the elevator finally dinged, signaling the basement floor. You opened your eyes just as the elevator door opened, only to reveal a huffing Jungkook.

He was breathing hard after running down the flights of stairs. There was no way in hell you would escape him now, not when he finally found you.

His dark clothes made him looked more imposing, more dangerous. His booted feet entered the elevator slowly, sauntering to where you were practically glued to the wall.

“Why are you running from me, noona?” He asked with his head tilted to the side. His voice was soft, but he was anything but.

Jungkook was both happy, yet angry. Happy that he finally found you. Angry that you had once again ran away from him, something that you weren’t allowed to do anymore.

Not when he finally found you.

“J-jungkook, that night was a mistake. I’m sorry,” you said with shaky voice, your hand stretched out in front of you to stop him from cornering you even further.

“Noona, how could you leave me alone?” He asked you with a pout, his hand caressing your face. Fucking finally. Finally, he could touch you again. “You promised me that you wouldn’t leave me.”

What?

“It wasn’t a mistake…it was meant to be,” he continued despite your grip on his thick wrist. You tried to stop him, but he was too determined and strong. His large body crowded you. He looked down at you with dark eyes, his eyebrow piercing glinting from the elevator’s light.

“But I forgive you. We’ll start again, noona.”

You were attracted to him, really you were. But the way he was right now, the way he sounded almost…terrifying, woke you up from the dream you were in. Jungkook was no prince charming.

“I need you to step back, Jungkook,” you said with a strong voice, pushing him away to no avail. “We need to talk about this?”

Jungkook chuckled darkly. “You want to talk? Fine, we’ll talk, noona.”

And before you knew it, he leaned down and your body was thrown over his wide shoulder.

Who would hear your cry for help in the basement? Who would stop him?

“Is that her?” Taehyung asked as he watched their maknae carried someone over his shoulder. He was finally smiling. No one knew this side of Jungkook. Behind his sweet smiles and personality, Jeon Jungkook was an obsessive man. No one knew, and unlucky you, you were about to experience first hand.

“It seems like,” Jimin answered before smiling.

No one could really control their maknae. What he wanted, he got.

Alternative ending

[salsakiyoomi]

sakusa kiyoomi is a man of his routine.

wake up early, get out of bed, take a quick shower, have breakfast, go out on his morning jog, come back home, rest for a while and then go out to practice.

that's how his everyday went — boring, right? to set such a standard and actually commit to it thoroughly every day.

but that's how kiyoomi is, how he always was — a man of his routine.

that is, until you came along.

his alarm rang about fifteen minutes ago but he's still in bed, his arms wrapped around you, and your legs are wrapped around his torso, a tangle of limbs as your face is buried into the crook of his neck, whispering, "just five more minutes."

he doesn't know how he ended up like this, still in bed even after his alarm rang when he should be up and in the shower right now, but somehow, for some reason, he could never find himself being able to say no to you.

"you said that five minutes ago." he whispers back, his fingers running gently through your hair — this is how his mornings have been ever since you moved in with him, lazy and comforting with the both of you so close to eachother, and he would never admit it out loud, but he actually likes this — likes the warmth of your body against his as you mutter sleepy sweet nothings to him.

"i know." you mumble, placing a soft kiss on the skin of his neck, "this just feels so nice." you hum sleepily, continuing to place soft, butterfly kisses on his neck, your lips barely even touching his skin as you do so, "can't you just stay home today?"

he can't help but shiver at the touch of your lips, how soft it is and he grunts quietly, "you know i can't, baby." he answers back — you always ask him this question, every morning, the answer remains the same and you don't press it, he can't help but think that you maybe ask him this just to tease him a bit.

you hum in response, and he can almost imagine your pout, but nonetheless, you continue to place butterfly kisses on his neck, trailing slowly up to his jaw, "kiyo, you're off tomorrow right?" you whisper against his skin, your hands slowly and gently trailing up his bare chest, to his shoulders and you wrap your arms around him.

he hums in response, "yeah." his fingers are treading through your hair gently, and his hand is tracing circles on your back.

you smile sleepily, he can see the way your eyes are half lidded, and he guesses you're not exactly fully awake yet, "good." you murmur "we can have this all tomorrow morning then without a deadline chasing your ass." he can't help but let out a short laugh when you say that, but he's quickly cut off when you press your lips against his mouth.

it's a bit of a sloppy kiss, with your lips parted so his tongue slips in, it's sleepy and slow, lazy as you move sluggishly against him, and you taste so sweet, like that chocolate cake you had last night before you slept, and like that strawberry lip balm you wear all the time, and he can't help but get lost in your taste.

you pull away, a small smile on your face and you plant a kiss on the corner of his mouth.

he can't help but smile a bit too, humming to himself, "i have to go now." he tells you quietly, attempting to get your arms off of him.

you shake your head and press yourself closer to him, "just five more minutes." you murmur, burying your face in the crook of his neck again.

sakusa kiyoomi is a man of his routine, he sets a standard and commits to it, and more often than not, he doesn't like it when his routine is disturbed.

but there is always an exception to the rule, and for you, he'll let you break his routine, and mumble about 'five more minutes' even though he knows they won't be the last ones as you press more butterfly kisses to his neck.

he'll let you have your own routine disturb his.

[padfootagain]

Only an Almost (III)

Chapter 3: By the Rules

Hello!! Here comes a new chapter! The Friends with Benefits is appearing in this one…

I hope you’ll like this chapter! Please, tell me what you think!

*************************************

Pairing: Hozier x fem!reader, friends with benefits AU

Warning: No explicit smut or nsfw content, but there are sexual themes and heavy make-out sessions (it’s a friends with benefits AU, I can’t really escape it), so 18+ only!

Summary: Andrew has been in love with you for years, and yet he has never confessed his feelings. But a night out celebrating the engagement of his best friend changes everything. However, you don't seem ready to be with him just yet. You make him an offer that he can't refuse... but will certainly regret.

Word Count : 2436

Masterlist for the series – Hozier’s Masterlist – Main Masterlist

Andrew had fucked up.

He hadn’t slept at all, how could he? That look on your face was printed on his irises, he could see nothing but that image whenever he closed his eyes. He had fucked up, he had lost you forever because he had gotten drunk and had leaned into some delusional thought for a moment…

What a fool. What a fucking idiot…

He hadn’t cried though. For now, his body was holding up on a mixture of anxiety, guilt, regret and hope. Perhaps you could forgive him. If he apologized properly, you would surely forgive him. He could lie about all this, pretend that he hadn’t meant it, that he was simply drunk and particularly lonely these days – both statements that were true – and that he had acted without thinking – also true. Yes, it would barely be a lie, after all! The only element that would be untrue was to pretend that he didn’t mean it, that he didn’t see you that way. That would be a blatant lie. Would you be able to read through him?

And anyway, should he lie to you like this? What had transpired last night… Andrew wasn’t sure that he could keep on living with such a secret weighing on his heart for much longer. Could he look at you without thinking about this stolen moment? About the feeling of your lips against his? About how you tasted?

He heaved a sigh, and reached for his phone anyway. Something had to be done, it didn’t matter what. Whether he would decide to be honest or to keep on hiding his feelings for you, a discussion needed to be had.

He typed his text, took a deep breath, and pressed ‘send’.

Morning Y/N

We should talk about last night, what about we meet up and get some coffee?

Xx

He silently cursed himself for the xx, but then again, he always put these or little hearts for you. The idiot of a romantic that he was. How cheesy…

His deprecating thoughts were interrupted by his phone buzzing in his hand. Your name appeared on the screen.

Yeah, I reckon we should…

5pm today? At the usual café?

Andrew heaved a relieved sigh as he typed a reply. At least, you were still willing to talk to him, it ought to be a good sign…

… right?

The coffeeshop wasn’t busy. After all, it was Thursday afternoon, and despite the warm and cozy feeling brought by the flowers on the tables, the books on the shelves and the quiet lights of the lamps, people were too busy with their work and their lives. Andrew couldn’t help but be grateful as he looked around at all the empty seats and lonely tables around him. There were but five more people in the establishment, which meant that if things didn’t go well, he wouldn’t be humiliated in front of an entire crowd.

He tried to be more hopeful. He had taken a decision: he wouldn’t pretend that what had happened was a mere fluke, that it didn’t mean anything. He would confess that he didn’t see you as a friend. And if you didn’t feel the same, then it was alright, of course. If you wanted to stop seeing him altogether, he would understand completely. And if you wanted the two of you to remain friends, then he was ready to make it work, somehow. For now, at least… Andrew wasn’t certain that he could keep on seeing you as a mere friend for long, it was becoming too painful for him. But on the other hand, he couldn’t imagine his life without you in it. He would need time to adapt, either way.

He was fidgeting as he stared at the empty chair before him. He was aware of his terrible habit to be late at everything, but today was not the day to arrive after you. So, he had arrived early on purpose, just to be safe.

His leg was shaking with nerves, and he was roughly massaging his palm.

Would you even come? Perhaps you would chicken out? Perhaps you didn’t want to see him, after all, perhaps you had changed your mind? Perhaps…?

His thoughts fell silent as you entered the shop. They were replaced by butterflies and a sudden jump of his heart…

You greeted him with a shy smile, before taking the seat he was offering you.

“How are you? How was your day? You want a coffee? Or tea?”

“Tea, thanks, Andy.”

You were taking off your coat and getting settled while Andrew was gone to order you a drink. When he came back, you seemed just as nervous as he was, you were fidgeting with the sleeve of your jumper.

“There you go,” Andrew whispered as he handed you your cup of tea, voice gentle and warm.

“Thanks.”

“So, how was your day?”

“Good, grand,” you nodded as Andrew was sitting back down.

You exchanged some niceties for a few minutes, but Andrew wasn’t fooled. Your answers were short and you seemed just as anxious as he was. He opted for silence after a few minutes, letting you stir the conversation towards the main topic that you had to discuss.

“Andy, about last night…”

You bit down on your lower lip, eyes fleeing his gaze. His heart was racing, beating so fast it could have exploded.

He cleared his throat, starting to rub at his palms again.

“Yeah… last night, huh…”

“You… you kissed me.”

It was his turn to avert his eyes while you looked up at him. He nodded his head.

“Yeah… I did.”

“Why?”

He let out a dry chuckle. His gaze settled on a couple a few tables away, a large coffee before both of them. They were smiling, he was reaching for her hand. Andrew refrained his sudden urge to scream at them.

“Isn’t that obvious? Why do people kiss other people?” he asked back.

“You were drunk.”

“Not that drunk. And you didn’t push me away.”

“I was drunk.”

“Were you that drunk?”

“Andy, look at me.”

He bit hard on the inside of his cheek as he complied. He couldn’t refuse you anything, anyway…

His right hand rose to painfully rub at his collarbone, the skin quickly turning a bright shade of red.

“Why did you kiss me last night?”

He blinked a couple of times, noticed the way you swallowed too hard.

“Because I wanted to.”

Your lips parted a little.

“Because you… you’re attracted to me?” you asked, and Andrew could have laughed at your puzzled expression, you almost looked scared now.

Scared? Why would you be scared of him? He would do anything for you. God, Andrew could die for you if you asked…

And what was that question, even? Attracted to you? The understatement of the century…

“You can say that, yeah.”

You slowly nodded. He took the opportunity of a moment of silence to drink a long gulp of his coffee, and then another, the bitterness biting at his tongue in a way that made him think about something else than your eyes and the way your lips looked as you bit them again, how much he wanted to kiss your mouth…

“So… you want to have sex with me.”

Andrew choked, grabbing a napkin before he would spill anything, coughing as he put down the cup back on the wooden table.

“Sorry… that was a bit blunt,” you said, but he knew you weren’t sorry at all.

You let him cough, try to catch back his breathing.

“Way too blunt, as always,” he half-joked.

“Andy, I…”

You heaved a sigh, rubbing at your temples like you were focused on a math problem at school. Was that what his kiss was? A problem to be solved?

“Look, I… Andy, you know I care about you. A lot. You’re… you’re one of my closest friends.”

He nodded.

“But?”

“But I can’t handle a relationship right now. Whether it’s with you, or anyone else, I just… I’m trying to figure myself out, I have this new job, I… I can’t handle dating someone, right now.”

“It’s okay, I understand,” he offered you a reassuring smile, and Andrew silently congratulated himself for hiding his disappointment so well. Or his heart breaking, to be fair…

“I can’t handle that…”

“I understand. It’s not the right time for you, I get it. It’s alright. It won’t happen again, you don’t have to worry.”

“But you… you’re attracted to me, right?”

He frowned, wondering why you were asking again.

“Like… if I told you that I wanted to sleep with you, you wouldn’t be against that, right? That’s why you kissed me last night?”

His heart was beating a thousand miles a minute. What was he supposed to answer to that? Pretend like he had never dreamt of making love to you all night? Lie and say that he didn’t mean it, that it was a mistake? Damn, that was the best kiss he had ever had…

“What am I supposed to answer that? You’ve just stated that you don’t want anything romantic to happen in your life at the moment. I’m not stupid, it’s alright. I understand, it won’t happen again.”

You heaved a sigh, your stare intense and yet he could see that you were looking for an answer in his soul, like you were scared as you spoke again.

“What if I want to have sex with you?”

His eyebrows shot upwards. He struggled to swallow, struggled to breathe as he shifted in his seat to lean forward, closer to you. He readjusted his glasses on his nose, and he noticed the way you stared, as if you liked what you saw.

“Do you? Want me like that?”

Damn, he was certain he was about to faint, how could a human hold their breath for so long? And this knot in his stomach, he was going to be sick at this rate…

“Yeah. Yeah, I think I do.”

He could hardly believe it. And yet he had witnessed the movement of your lips around those words, there was no doubt left to have. He nervously licked his lips, went back to rubbing at his collarbone as if he wanted to tore the flesh from it. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to cry or to laugh or simply to finally have a full intake of breath.

“I don’t follow,” he admitted, although it was more that his brain couldn’t possibly compute what you were stating.

“I want you. Physically, I mean. I want you.”

“But you don’t want a relationship.”

“No, I don’t. But you’re handsome, and I’m attracted to you too.”

And that’s when the realisation struck, and it acted like a cold shower, like the icy water hitting his skin when he dove in the ocean in winter. Same shock that took all the air out of his lungs. To be fair, he had not noticed before that he had any oxygen left in these organs of his. It was like… getting a punch in the guts.

“So… you want… just sex? Nothing more.”

It wasn’t really a question, something closer to a statement. He had hoped, for a second, that you felt the same. But you just wanted sex. And he wanted so, so much more…

“Yeah. I mean… like a… friends with benefits situation, you know? Like… we would still be the same, but… with the sex too.”

“But it wouldn’t mean a thing,” he protested, but you didn’t seem to read that feeling in his voice, considering your answer.

“No, it wouldn’t mean anything. Just… two pals who find each other attractive releasing some tension.”

Releasing some tension? Yoga was for releasing tension, not sleeping with the woman he was secretly desperately in love with?!

“What do you say? Would you like that?”

You were serious. He couldn’t believe you were serious… Couldn’t you see that Andrew was in love with you? Couldn’t you… couldn’t you feel it last night? In the way he held you, in the way he touched you, in the way he kissed you?

This was a bad idea. A terrible, terrible idea that would surely backfire and kill him in the end…

“I… I don’t know, to be honest. I’m not sure I want that.”

Slowly, you nodded, leaning further away from him, back against your chair, and he wanted to reach out to pull you closer again, even if you were still separated by the table.

“Okay. I’m sorry I asked that. I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable.”

“It’s alright. You only asked a question.”

“So… we forget about the kiss then?”

That was the only option, of course. The only reasonable way out of this mess.

Damn it.

“Actually… why not?”

It was your turn to raise a surprised eyebrow. Andrew struggled not to smile when you leaned closer again.

“Really?”

“But then… we need some rules. Cause… that could become… complicated…”

“You’ll hurt yourself.”

“What?”

You nodded towards his shoulder, and he finally noticed that he had been rubbing at the skin too hard.

“Andy, relax, it’s just me. Stop it, you’re gonna hurt yourself.”

“Sorry,” he mumbled, resting his hands on the table only to start rubbing at his palms. He didn’t even know why he was apologizing.

“It’s okay if you don’t want me like that. We can remain friends.”

“I… I do want you, Y/N. That’s not the problem.”

“The problem?”

I’m not sure I’ll survive if I have you for a moment, and then you leave.

“Friends with benefits… that’s usually messy.”

“Not if we establish rules.”

“What rules?”

“Well, first, no kissing outside of the bedroom. Only for sex. Second, we don’t fall asleep together. Third rule, no one can know about this. And just… If we do this, it can’t be anything but sex. We can’t get attached like this. It’s just… it’s just sex, nothing more.”

Slowly, he nodded. It was a terrible idea. And yet, what else could he be to you? After that kiss last night, Andrew didn’t believe he could remain a mere friend to you for long. And if you couldn’t be in a relationship now, then this was the next best thing he could get. He could still have you, in a way. He could still be yours. And maybe one day, you would want more…

You offered him your open hand. Like signing a contract. Agreeing to a business offer.

“What do you say?”

Andrew raised his hand to meet yours.

“Alright, let’s do this.”

[oceandolores]

𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐫'𝐬 𝐝𝐚𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐞𝐫 | chapter 19

dbf!joel miller x female reader

"Every time I close my eyes , it's like a dark paradise"

summary: you met someone you thought you will never see again

warnings: 18+ only, Minors DNI, AU, No outbreak. (TW) mentions of substance abuse/alcohol use disorder, adult content, religion abuse, violence, blood gore, mentions of death, sexual abuse, sexual content, domestic violences, pedophilia, cannibalism, human trafficking, dad's best friend!Joel, HUGE age gap (i will not specify her exact age, but she's legal and Joel is 49), daddy issues, mentions of toxic family dynamic, Joel is widowed, Ellie is 16, angst, smut A LOT, forbidden relationship, soft and protective Joel, innocent and pure reader. your last name is Gibson. any other details will be explain throughout the story. inspired by the album Preacher's daughter by Ethel Cain and also mix with lana del rey vibes.

CHAPTER 19

masterlist!

previous | chapter 18

next | chapter 20

Joel’s days bled into nights, each second stretching painfully into the next as he searched for you, his desperation sinking into his bones, gnawing at the core of him. It had been a year—a long, relentless year without you. And yet, each time the sun set, he felt the ache deepen, as if it were the first day all over again.

He barely slept, barely ate, his mind only running through endless, frayed memories and half-seen shadows, trying to piece together the face of the man who took you.

In his hands, the maps were worn soft, smudged with the faint ink of hastily scribbled notes, each line a fragment of his obsession. Every lead brought him from one shabby motel to another, each with rooms that smelled of stale smoke and peeling paint, rooms that looked like places where people vanished.

And still, you weren’t there.

Each disappointment drove him further into the kind of desperation that made him push aside his pride and seek help. He went back to Frank and Bill. They did what they could to help Joel, sheltering him, keeping him out of the FBI’s reach, printing missing posters and scattering them across countless towns, reaching strangers who might hold a shred of information.

Anything to bring you back.

Back home, Tommy, Maria, and Ellie were waging their own quiet battle to find you, doing all they could without raising suspicion. Their quiet alliance held the family together as the months dragged on, sharing hushed updates through phone calls that grew more desperate, more strained.

Ellie tried to keep her hopes up, imagining you somewhere safe, waiting for rescue. But in her heart, she could sense the tremor of fear that everyone else tried to hide.

Alone, Joel grew unraveled, each night lost to bottles of booze that only burned his throat and numbed nothing. He let the papers pile around him, scraps littering tables and floors, covering the walls of Frank and Bill's guest room as if he could somehow will them into an answer.

Sometimes, he’d find himself whispering to the empty air, as though you could hear him, as if his voice might reach through the miles. He pictured your face—so vividly, it ached—wondering if you felt him out there, searching.

Joel held that crumpled, fraying photo, it was the photo of him and you in Houston night fair a year ago. His thumb brushing over your face frozen in that photo booth smile.

It was a memory he clung to in moments of weakness—when everything had been beautiful and right, when he still believed the world held space for happiness.

“Where are you, doll? Come back to me... I can’t do this without you.” His voice cracked, swallowed by the darkness. Every silence, every cold night, brought him closer to madness. He could almost hear you whispering back, as if in the ghostly hush, your spirit hovered just beyond reach.

But across that unseen distance, your reality was twisted, tethered to the darkest kind of survival. Negan’s shadow stretched over you, growing more sinister, feeding off your misery, his cruelty sharpening with every "client" he sent your way.

Each encounter made you sick; the nauseating dread gnawed at your insides until you turned numb. He forced you to swallow handfuls of pills, snort lines of powder until the world blurred, all to make you obedient.

And you were compliant now, the fight in you dimmed to a silent acceptance. Resistance meant pain, bruises, and the relentless smirk on his face as he reminded you who held all the power. So you learned to still yourself, to play dead, just to survive the hell.

Each night, you sank further, disappearing into the numbness the drugs provided, the feeling of survival slipping through your fingers. The hollow shell you’d become didn’t fight him, didn’t flinch under his gaze or resist when his rough hands traced over your skin, marking you in ways that left scars deeper than any wound. 

He raped you over and over again. Every night, almost every day.

One night, he gave you a room of your own. A twisted gift of “freedom.”, a mockery of comfort in this prison where he kept you. He still came to you each night, creeping into the darkness, and if you moved or whimpered, his hand would clamp over your mouth as he told you, sweet as sugar, not to fight, that “we’re just playing house.”

You could barely keep your eyes open, the haze of sleeping pills thick in your head. His sickly-sweet games bled into the hours until you lost track of time. By morning, your body felt like a shell, hollow and sore, skin pulled tight over bones.

And that smell—it clung to the air, especially strong near the heavy metal door down the hall that Negan kept locked tight. A rancid, metallic odor, a reminder of something you’d rather not know.

You avoided looking at the fridge, too, its shelves stuffed with slabs of meat that didn’t look like anything from a grocery store. Your stomach turned at the thought, and you took to cooking whatever you could, clinging to some shred of normalcy with pancakes and eggs, anything but that meat.

But when Negan stomped into the kitchen that morning and you put the pancakes on his plate, his face twisted with disgust. His hand shot out, sending the plate crashing to the floor as he barked, “You call this breakfast?” You flinched, heart hammering in your chest.

“There’s nothing left, just the meat,” you managed to whisper, trying to calm him, to avoid the sting of his rage.

But his face darkened, and he hissed, “Then eat the damn meat.” Nodding, you moved to the fridge, pulling it open, but before you could even start, the nausea hit you hard.

You stumbled to the bathroom, stomach heaving, bile rising as you clung to the edge of the sink. It had been days of this—dizzy spells, constant nausea, a weakness that wouldn’t fade.

You asked him, once, to take you to a doctor, but he’d only laughed, brushing off your words as if they were nothing.

But that morning, as you knelt there, Negan’s mocking voice drifted from the kitchen. “You sure got a weak stomach, sweetheart. Or wait,” he paused, as if a dark thought dawned on him.

“you wouldn’t be knocked up, would you?” His words sliced through the air, and in an instant, dread filled your veins.

Negan’s grin spread, a slow, dark realization flickering in his gaze. He tilted his head, studying the growing horror in your expression. “What’s wrong, sweetheart? Got something to tell me?”

You tried to dismiss the thought, No, every clients always use condoms or pull out, there's rules, strict rules by Negan that everyone need to follow.

"Alright, tell me which one of ’em didn’t pull out, huh? You let one of ’em break the rules?” His tone shifting from amusement to something far darker, his voice is low, cruel and invasive, as if he could peel back your skin and see into every memory you wanted to erase.

You shook your head, unable to hold back the tremor in your voice. “No one… they all followed the rules..." Then the realization hit you.

No.

No, It couldn’t be.

You couldn’t carry his child.

Negan’s smirk deepened, his eyes gleaming with a twisted satisfaction. “Guess that leaves only me, then,” His fingers grazed over your jaw, tilting your face up.

"Goddamn, I knocked you up, didn't I?" He mocked you with his laugh and a big grin on his face.

“Guess we’ll be a real family now, huh, sweetheart?” You shuddered listen to what he said, nausea twisting into a spiraling fear.

The room spun as panic clawed at your chest. A child bound to this, bound to him, a part of him, growing inside you, chaining you to this nightmare forever.

This couldn’t be happening. You can't bring a child into this prison, no. Not with him.

The thought ignited a fire of panic deep within your chest, yet you felt paralyzed, frozen in his grip. Your hands trembled, and a numbness spread through your veins. The world around you blurred, his face, his voice, everything distorting in a haze of disbelief and horror.

***

Tonight’s your last client for a while, he’d said, with a twisted grin that made you feel sick to your core. He wanted you to carry his child, to tie you to him with an unbreakable chain, to make you his forever.

The thought was unbearable, a darkness spreading through you, filling every corner of your mind with a terrible dread.

You kept your face blank, expression as smooth and placid as a lake’s surface while your insides churned. You couldn’t let him see the fear, the desperate calculations racing through your mind.

But every time you imagined the life inside you, growing, becoming a part of this nightmare, the dread swelled, crashing over you like a wave.

That afternoon, Negan took you to the grocery store, his hand firm around your arm as he steered you through the aisles. He had that sharp glint in his eye, the one that warned you not to cross him.

Normally, you did this on your own, gathering what you needed while he watched from his truck outside. But today, he hovered close, his presence a constant reminder of the leash you couldn’t see but felt tightening with every step.

The store was cold, the fluorescent lights harsh against your skin. You moved mechanically, plucking items from shelves, the rhythm of normalcy a bitter contrast to the chaos inside.

Your fingers shook slightly as you reached for a can, and you forced yourself to breathe slowly, in and out, hoping he wouldn’t notice. He was bored, restless, eyes scanning the people around you with thinly veiled irritation. When the line at the checkout stretched out, he sighed impatiently.

“Fuck this,” he muttered, leaning close, his grip firm on your face. “You try any shit, and you know what’ll happen. Got it, sweetheart?”

You nodded, throat tight, and he released you, storming out to wait in the truck.

The line crept forward, a snail’s pace that made your pulse thud in your temples. Each second felt stretched, unreal, the world around you moving in slow motion. You clutched the handle of the shopping cart, mind racing.

People milled around you, chatting, smiling, oblivious to the shadow that lingered just beyond these walls, waiting to consume you whole. You wanted to run, to disappear into the crowd and never look back, but his warning echoed in your ears, a brutal reminder that you were still chained.

When it was your turn at the register, the cashier was kind, offering a smile that made your heart ache with longing for something that felt impossibly far away.

You fumbled through paying, glancing nervously toward the parking lot where you knew he waited, his gaze a weight you could feel even from a distance.

You made your way to the truck, feeling his eyes on you, his smirk as you approached. You tried to keep your voice steady as you loaded the bags in. “They…they didn’t have pregnancy tests. They were out of stock.”

Negan chuckled, a sound that made your skin crawl. “Figures. Bet all the other sluts in this town already cleaned ‘em out.” He smirked, a gleam in his eye that held no warmth.

“Get your ass in. We’ll grab one at the gas station."

You climbed into the truck, feeling trapped, the seat belt tight across your chest like a noose. His words echoed in your mind, each one a nail hammered into the cage around you.

The plan he’d laid out twisted your insides, a sickness coiling in your stomach that was worse than anything you’d ever felt. You couldn’t bring a child into this—a child tied to him, a child trapped just as you were.

The weight of it settled over you, heavier with every mile you drove, until it felt like you could hardly breathe. Your mind raced, grasping for something—anything—to stop this.

You were spiraling into a dark pit of despair, thoughts swirling like autumn leaves caught in a tempest. The closer you got to the gas station, the more your heart pounded against your ribs, desperate for freedom.

As you arrived, Negan leaned back in the truck, his eyes glinting with impatience. “I’ll wait here. You go in, but be fucking quick.” His tone was as sharp as a blade, leaving no room for disobedience.

You nodded, pushing the weight of your dread aside as you stepped out into the sunlight, a harsh reminder of the world beyond this nightmare.

Inside, the fluorescent lights flickered above, cold and clinical, You moved for selecting the pregnancy test from the aisle, fingers brushing over it as an image flickered in your mind—Joel’s face, his soft smile, the warmth of his hand brushing over yours.

You bit back the tears that burned in your eyes, the ache in your chest deepening. This wasn’t how it was supposed to be.

This isn’t how it’s supposed to be.

You always wanted a family of your own, but not like this. Not with him. A child tied to this nightmare would mean a lifetime under Negan’s thumb—a life bound to his sick, twisted idea of family.

You blinked back tears and moved toward the counter, your thoughts in turmoil, when a voice—a familiar voice—pierced the haze.

“Is that you?”

You turned, heart pounding, and there she was—Emma. Your best friend, the one you hadn’t seen in what felt like a lifetime. The sight of her sent a jolt of warmth through your veins, but it was quickly overshadowed by the shadows lurking in your mind.

Her face was lined with surprise and worry, and as your eyes met, memories flooded back—laughter shared in the hallways, secrets whispered under the stars.

She stepped closer, and you felt her arms wrap around you, a lifeline in a turbulent sea. The embrace was both a comfort and a reminder of everything you’d lost.

“Oh my god, it’s really you,” Emma whispered, pulling back to study your face, her own eyes glistening with unshed tears. You felt the weight of her worry pressing against you, and you wished you could share the whole truth, but the words tangled in your throat.

“Where have you been? It’s been over a year…” Her voice trembled, and for a moment, you were lost in the familiarity of her presence, a beacon of hope in your dark reality.

You took a shaky breath, trying to piece together your thoughts. “How—how can you be here?”

After a moment, she explained, her voice rushing as if she were afraid time might snatch you away again. “After graduation, Jim and I moved to California. We just got married last month!” The excitement in her voice felt like a distant echo, contrasting sharply with your own turmoil.

But as quickly as the happiness arrived, it faded. “Are you okay? Where’s Joel?” Emma asked, concern etching deeper lines on her forehead.

You felt a sharp pang in your chest at the mention of his name, the very name that felt like both a lifeline and a chain. “I got kidnapped,” you managed to choke out, your voice trembling.

Emma’s expression morphed from surprise to confusion, and then to horror. “What? What are you talking about?” She looked around, panic creeping into her eyes, as if the very ground beneath you was about to give way.

“I can’t explain it to you,” you said, your heart racing. “He’s out there.” You gestured vaguely, your heart sinking as you glanced outside and saw Negan, an ominous figure lingering like a dark cloud over your thoughts.

Emma’s eyes widened as she took in the scene. “Wait, it’s not Joel,” she whispered, her voice tinged with disbelief. "Where the fuck is Joel? What is happening?"

"Didn't Joel fucking killed your parents and Jamie and Ben?"

“No! He didn’t kill them. Negan did." You said, "Please Emma, you have to help me,"

“Who’s Negan?” Emma asked, her brow furrowing with confusion and fear.

“He took me from Joel. He framed Joel,” you said urgently, dragging Emma to a quieter corner of the store, heart racing with the urgency of your situation. This was your chance, a lifeline thrown to you in the storm.

“Help me, please, please,” you begged, tears spilling down your cheeks. “I can’t stay with him any longer. I need you to do something.”

Emma’s expression shifted as she processed your words, the gravity of your situation crashing over her like a tidal wave. “Can we call the cops?” she asked, her voice trembling.

“No, we can’t! He’ll kill us!” Panic flared in your chest, a wild beast clawing at the walls of your sanity. “I don't have much time, but you need to tell Tommy, Emma. Call him and say I’m in California. I don’t know where Negan’s house is, but his name is Negan Smith. The man who took me is Negan Smith. Tell him to find his address.”

Emma's eyes widened, the reality dawning on her. “W-we could just run away. My car is out there.”

“No! You don’t understand. He'll hunt us down. He’s dangerous, Emma. We need to be smart about this.” The words poured from you, desperation lacing every syllable.

“I just need to get out of here.” you whispered, your voice cracking. “I can’t stay with him another day.”

In that moment, she stepped closer, enveloping you in her arms. The warmth of her embrace was a balm against the icy grip of fear that had settled around your heart.

You could feel her tremble, too—an echo of your own turmoil. It was a shared sorrow, a recognition of the gravity of your plight.

“I promise I’ll get you out,” she whispered fiercely, her breath warm against your ear. Tears streamed down her cheeks, and you felt your own grief swell anew, a flood of emotions threatening to spill over.

The weight of everything—the fear, the pain, the uncertainty—pressed down on you both, and in that fragile moment, you wept together, two souls adrift in a storm.

“I can’t stay with him another day,” you sobbed, the truth cutting through you like a knife. You could feel Emma’s heartache mingling with your own, each beat a reminder of the love and hope you were fighting for, despite the darkness that loomed.

She pulled back, searching your eyes, and then her gaze dropped to the pregnancy test clutched in your trembling hands. “Are you…?” she began, her voice faltering.

“He raped me, Emma,” "Over and over again," you admitted, each word a raw confession, a wound laid bare.

“and he pimped me out. He made me into a prostitute.” The weight of those words crushed you, the reality so unbearable that you felt like you were going to shatter.

Emma’s expression shifted to one of horror. “Is it… is it his child?” she stammered, and you could see the disbelief in her eyes, the way your pain struck her like a physical blow.

“I can’t… I can’t, I can't have this baby,” you whispered, choking on the anguish. You could barely comprehend the gravity of it all, a future painted in shades of dread.

Just then, you caught a glimpse of Negan climbing out of the truck, and fear twisted in your gut like a knife. “Tell Tommy to find me,” you urged Emma one last time.

“And if you find Joel… please tell him I’m waiting for him. Always.”

With that you pulled away, forcing a smile to mask the turmoil swirling within you. You had to play your part. You turned away from Emma, letting the illusion of normalcy settle over you like a shroud.

Emma ducked into the shadows, her presence fading from your periphery, and you approached Negan, your heart pounding like a war drum in your chest.

“What took you so fucking long?” he barked, irritation etched on his face.

You feigned confusion, forcing the words out. “I’m just… confused, Negan. It’s my first time.”

“Then just fucking pick anything! Jesus, woman.” His voice cracked like a whip, sending a shiver down your spine. You nodded, swallowing the knot of fear in your throat, feeling smaller than ever.

As he stepped outside, waiting by the truck, you turned toward the cashier, each step heavy with the weight of what you were about to do.

The store felt surreal, a juxtaposition of mundane normalcy against the tempest brewing in your heart. Each item on the shelves seemed to mock your despair, the fluorescent lights flickering like distant stars in a darkened sky, reminding you of everything you had lost.

Approaching the counter, the world around you began to blur, thoughts racing through your mind like a whirlwind. What if this was it? What if you didn’t escape?

The reality of your situation sank in, pressing down on you like a lead weight, suffocating in its intensity. You were here, a ghost of your former self, trapped in a nightmare of someone else’s making, and the walls felt like they were closing in.

As you laid down the items—each one a reminder of a life you once knew—you thought of Joel.

His warmth, his laughter, the way he made you feel safe against the chill of the world. Those memories glimmered like fragile stars in the darkness, a bittersweet ache that filled your chest.

You wondered if he was fighting for you, if he even knew what had become of you.

You took a breath, trying to steady the whirlwind inside. As the cashier rang up your items, your mind spiraled back to the pregnancy test, the weight of it pressing down on your conscience.

In your faith, it was a sin to kill a baby, a sin that echoed through your upbringing like a haunting hymn. The Bible spoke of life being a sacred gift, a trust from God.

But this baby is not a gift.

The thought of bringing a child into this world—a world filled with darkness and pain, where they could inherit a life as broken as your own—sent waves of panic crashing through you.

You steeled yourself, feeling the tremor of fear and guilt intertwining within you. “Do you have anything?” you asked, the words tumbling out before you could second-guess yourself.

“I want to get rid of it,” you said, your hand instinctively brushing against your abdomen as if to shield the burgeoning life from the shadows lurking in your reality.

The cashier’s eyes widened, shock painting her features. “What do you mean?”

You swallowed hard, fighting back tears. “I… I want to get rid of it.” You gestured to your belly, feeling the weight of your confession settle in the air between you.

The cashier hesitated, her expression flickering between concern and caution. “You sure about it?” she asked, her voice softening, an unspoken understanding passing between you.

“Yes,” you whispered, desperation threading through your tone. “Please, just anything.”

She studied you for a moment, weighing the gravity of your request. “Are you really sure about it? It’s none of my business, but you should consider going to a hospital for this.”

“No, I can’t. I—I just can’t,” you managed, urgency coursing through your veins. “Just give it to me.”

“Alright, but it ain’t my fault if anything happens,” she replied, her voice laced with a mixture of sympathy and resignation. You watched as she reached beneath the counter, pulling out a small, unassuming package that felt like both a lifeline and a curse.

As she handed it to you, time seemed to stand still, the world around you fading into a blur. This was it—a moment carved in time, one that would alter your path forever. You grasped the package tightly, your fingers trembling as you felt the weight of your decision press against your chest.

You turned to leave, but just before stepping out, you glanced back at Emma. Her eyes were glistening with tears, her face a mixture of fear and heartbreak. The sight of her anguish sent a fresh wave of guilt crashing over you, a reminder of the innocence that had been stolen from both of you.

You wanted to reach out, to assure her that you were going to be okay, but the words caught in your throat. Instead, you silently nod and gave her one last smile, you don't know if you're gonna see her ever again.

As you stepped out of the store, the fluorescent lights flickered behind you, casting long shadows on the pavement that stretched out before you. The outside world felt colder, more foreboding, as if it sensed the turmoil brewing within your heart.

Each heartbeat echoed the weight of your choice, the urgency of your situation clawing at your mind. You were standing at the precipice of an uncertain future, the horizon obscured by the storm clouds of despair and fear that loomed above you.

But amidst the chaos, a flicker of resolve ignited deep within. You thought of Joel, his strength, his unwavering presence that made you feel safe even when the world was crumbling around you. In your darkest moments, his memory became a guiding light, urging you to fight for the life you once had.

You needed to find your way back to him, to reclaim your story from the shadows that threatened to consume you. The road ahead was murky, each step a treacherous dance with danger, but you steeled yourself for the fight. The thought of Joel ignited a fire in your belly, a relentless determination to survive.

With each breath, you whispered a silent prayer into the darkening sky, clutching the small package against your heart as you resolved to face whatever lay ahead.

You would find a way to escape this nightmare, to reclaim your future, and to make sure that Negan would never have power over you again.

The night felt heavy with anticipation, the air thick with a tension that twisted in your gut. You stood in front of the hotel mirror, the fluorescent lights casting a harsh glare on your reflection.

Each detail felt foreign—your skin, once vibrant, now dulled and pale; your body, a ghost of its former self, now a canvas marked by the weight of what you had endured.

Emma’s words echoed in your mind: “It’s been a year since I last saw you.” It means now it's been a year and a half. A lifetime spent away from Joel, the man whose laughter had once wrapped around you like a warm blanket.

You missed him so fiercely it was like a physical ache, a void in your chest that no amount of prayer seemed to fill. You whispered your pleas to God, each word hanging in the air like a desperate song.

But as the days blurred into nights, doubt began to creep in, gnawing at your faith like a hungry wolf. Was there even a God to hear you?

You glanced down at your stomach, where a life was growing inside you, innocent and unaware of the darkness surrounding it.

You remembered the test you took earlier with Negan, the little plus sign a cruel twist of fate.

Pregnant with his child.

The thought twisted in your gut, an iron weight pressing down, reminding you of everything you had been taught.

Your father’s sermons flooded your mind, words from the Good Book spilling into your consciousness like water from a broken dam. “Children are a gift from God,” he had preached, his voice booming with conviction.

But this child felt like a curse, a cruel reminder of the monster that had taken you from the light and plunged you into shadow.

If it was a boy, what hope did he have of escaping his father’s blood? If it was a girl, you couldn’t bear the thought of her living in a world ruled by a monster like Negan. You don't want them to live your life, no.

No, you couldn’t bring this life into a world so steeped in pain and darkness. You would save them, save them from their father’s sins, from your own sins.

In the solitude of the bathroom, you grasped the small package tightly, your heart racing as you decided to take four pills, hoping to end what had begun.

Your hands trembled as you swallowed them, each one feeling like a stone lodged in your throat, a final act of defiance against the life growing within you.

Almost immediately, pain erupted in your abdomen, sharp and relentless, as if the very fabric of your being was unraveling. You doubled over, gasping for breath, your body turning weak and unresponsive.

The world around you blurred, the edges softening into darkness.

Then, a sudden pressure built within you, an overwhelming urge that felt like it was ripping you apart from the inside. You stumbled toward the toilet, only to be met with the horrifying sight of blood—thick, dark clots spilling out between your leg. Dizziness swept over you, and your knees buckled beneath you.

A loud knock echoed from the door, a frantic urgency that barely registered in your foggy mind. You didn’t respond; you couldn’t. The world spun wildly, the darkness closing in as you finally succumbed to unconsciousness.

In those final moments, you caught a glimpse of a figure—a man, not Negan, shrouded in shadows—his face indistinct. A fleeting sense of fear gripped you before everything faded to black.

***

You jolted awake in a hospital bed, the sterile scent of antiseptic assaulting your senses. Confusion clouded your mind, disorientation settling in like a thick fog. 

What had happened? The memories of the hotel room came rushing back, a torrent of pain and loss flooding your thoughts.

Then, you saw him—Negan. His face twisted in fury, a storm brewing behind his eyes. “What the fuck did you do?” he barked, the words sharp and menacing, cutting through the haze of your consciousness.

You were no longer in the hotel. Your heart raced, each beat a reminder of the choices you had made, the life you had tried to save, and the monster that now loomed before you.

"Wha--what happened?" you managed to stammer, confusion clouding your mind.

“Robert,” he spat, the name dripping with venom. “The man supposed to be satisfied by you found you passed out, blood coming from your fucking vagina.” His words struck you like a physical blow, and the reality of your situation settled over you like a shroud. 

“I lost the fucking money because of you!”

Your breath hitched in your throat as Negan’s hands closed around your neck, squeezing tightly. Panic surged through you, and your vision blurred as you gasped for air. 

"And you. You fucking killed it, you killed my child." he hissed, his face inches from yours, anger radiating off him like heat from a fire.

“I can’t… breathe…” you choked out, the world around you spiraling into darkness.

The realization crashed over you like a wave, and the weight of his accusation sank into your bones. He knew. 

You successfully killed it.

Desperation clawed at your throat as you felt the pressure tighten. “Please… let go…” you begged, tears welling in your eyes.

"I should have fucking killed you for it. I gave you everything. I gave you a house, jewelry, dresses—everything. And you... You can’t even say thank you to me." His voice was a storm, his breath hot against your skin, suffocating you with anger and betrayal.

“This is how you repay me? Murdered my child? You ungrateful bitch.” His grip was like a vice, unyielding and cruel, squeezing the breath from your lungs. Your hands flailed, grasping at his wrist in a desperate attempt to free yourself, but it was futile.

Then, just as suddenly as it began, the pressure released. A sound echoed in the room—the quick, heavy footsteps of someone entering. The doctor. She rushed in, her expression a mixture of concern and urgency, breaking the spell of Negan’s rage.

Before she could assess the situation, Negan released you, feigning innocence as if nothing had happened. The mask he wore was chilling in its calmness, a predator in a sheep’s clothing.

“Good, you’re awake,” the doctor said, her voice laced with concern. “I’m really sorry to say, but you lost the baby.”

Each word was a heavy stone, dropping into the depths of your soul, sending ripples of anguish through you. You had made a choice, a choice steeped in desperation and fear.

You had committed a sin that now hung over you like a dark cloud, one that would shadow you for the rest of your life. The weight of your actions settled on your chest, squeezing the air from your lungs as effectively as Negan’s hands had.

You had killed a life that had barely begun, snuffing out a flame before it could ever flicker. The echoes of your father’s sermons filled your mind—his rigid beliefs, the scriptures twisted into weapons against anyone who strayed from the path.

You remembered the fervor in his voice as he spoke about children being blessings, gifts from God. But how could you bring a child into this world, into the clutches of a monster?

“It was three months old,” the doctor continued, her tone gentle yet firm. “You took too many pills. You had a miscarriage. We’re already getting everything out from you.”

With each sentence, you felt the ground shift beneath you, the world tilting as the weight of what you had done bore down on your heart.

"Now, your condition is not stable, we recommend you stay here or do you prefer to go home?"

Before you could respond, Negan’s voice cut through the room, harsh and authoritative. “No. We can take care of ourselves. We just need to go home.” His words dripped with a possessiveness that made your skin crawl.

The doctor nodded, taken aback by his decisiveness, and you could see the thin veneer of professionalism slipping away as concern flickered across her face.

As she prepared your discharge, a whirlwind of fear enveloped you. The idea of returning to that dark house, of being alone with Negan, sent icy tendrils creeping up your spine. You felt like a bird caught in a storm, wings clipped and unable to escape the chaos.

What would he do to you? The thought gnawed at your insides, a relentless whisper that echoed through your mind. You had already seen the monster within him, and now that you had taken away his child, you feared what lay ahead.

Would he unleash his fury upon you? Would he kill you?

The hospital room felt like a fragile bubble, a temporary refuge from the darkness that awaited. As the doctor handed you a few papers, explaining what to expect, you could hardly focus.

Your mind was a flurry of thoughts—about the life that had been extinguished, about the man who now loomed over you, and about the impending return to hell.

Every moment spent in that sterile room felt like an eternity, yet all too soon, the time came to leave. Negan’s presence loomed beside you, his anger barely contained, a smoldering ember threatening to ignite.

As you walked through the hospital doors, the world outside felt both foreign and suffocating. You stepped into the night, it only served to highlight the darkness within you.

With every step toward the truck, your heart raced, a drumbeat of dread marking the rhythm of your impending fate. You asked God this time.

***

The journey to his house was a blur, each mile a countdown to the inevitable confrontation. The walls of the truck felt like they were closing in, pressing down on you with an unbearable weight, and you fought against the rising tide of panic swelling within your chest.

Each bump in the road sent jolts of fear coursing through you, reminding you of the storm that awaited you in the shadows of Negan's world.

As the truck lurched to a stop in the driveway, dread coiled tightly around your heart. You were still weak, your body aching from the remnants of your earlier ordeal, but that didn’t matter to Negan. The moment the door swung open, he was upon you, his rage igniting like wildfire.

Without warning, he punched your stomach, the pain radiating through you like a shockwave. You gasped, doubling over as the world blurred around you.

He didn’t wait for you to recover, dragging you by your hair as your body felt the ground, from the truck with a brutal strength that made you feel like a rag doll.

“Get fucking inside!” he snarled, his voice a low growl, devoid of any compassion. The darkness of the basement loomed ahead, an abyss waiting to swallow you whole, and with each step, the walls seemed to close in tighter, the air heavy with unspoken threats.

Once inside, he unleashed the storm that had been brewing during the drive. “You killed my child!” he roared, his fury reverberating off the walls like thunder.

Each word was a strike, sharp and relentless, cutting through the fragile remnants of your spirit. “I SHOULD FUCKING KILL YOU FOR IT! YOU UNGRATEFUL BITCH!”

His fists rained down on you, each punch a testament to his rage, and the pain was a visceral reminder of your shattered choices. You cried out, tears streaming down your cheeks as you tried to shield yourself from his wrath.

You felt small, powerless, as he pulled your hair, yanking you back into his orbit of violence.

“Please, Negan… stop!” you begged, but your words fell on deaf ears. Your pleas were drowned out by his anger, a tempest that raged against the fragile vestiges of your hope.

Then, in a terrifying twist, he dragged you toward the toilet in the basement. You knew what was coming, the reality of it sending a shiver down your spine.

As he held you down, your heart raced, fear curling around you like a snake. He plunged your head into the cold, unforgiving water of the toilet, and instinctively, you fought against him.

You screamed, the sound echoing in the confined space, desperate for someone—anyone—to hear you. Your voice was a fragile thread, straining against the suffocating darkness that surrounded you.

The water rushed into your ears, muffling the world, and in that moment, you felt like a drowning sailor, flailing against the tide, praying for the hand of rescue to pull you from the depths.

Each gasp was a desperate plea, each breath a struggle against the overwhelming force threatening to swallow you whole.

Every instinct screamed at you to fight, to survive, but in that suffocating darkness, you felt your resolve weaken. You were trapped in a nightmare of your own making, the very monster you had tried to escape now looming over you, and all you could do was pray—pray for an end to the torment, pray for mercy, pray for the light to break through the crushing darkness.

He pulled your hair, yanking you up and forcing you onto your back, the rough floor digging into your skin. The pain ignited your senses, but he didn’t stop there.

His boots connected with your body in brutal kicks, each impact sending shockwaves of agony radiating through you. “I keep you alive! I put a roof over your fucking head! And this is how you repay me?” he spat, venom lacing his words.

“I should have fucking killed you from the beginning!” With every kick, you felt your spirit crack, your body weak and unable to retaliate.

You crawled backward, instinctively trying to escape, but there was nowhere to go. You were a fragile leaf in a storm, tossed about and battered, your only response a quiet, desperate, “Please… stop….”

He advanced, relentless, an embodiment of fury, each blow a reminder of your helplessness. “Now I can’t fucking kill you,” he growled, eyes blazing with a twisted sense of satisfaction, “What a fucking waste!"

As he beat you, the world faded into a haze of pain and fear. You felt your thoughts slipping away, replaced by a singular mantra��God, please make it stop. 

You realized you hadn’t prayed in so long, hadn’t found solace in faith, and yet now you found yourself begging for a reprieve from this torment. “Why won’t you help me?” the question echoed in your mind, a haunting refrain amidst the chaos.

Negan grabbed you by the hair again, lifting your head as if to force you to confront the monster before you. “What should I do to you, hm?” His voice dripped with malice, and you could see the gears turning in his mind. “You killed my child. You need to suffer.”

You were too tired, too hurt to even look at him, your body pleading for relief, but his grip was unyielding. "You would fucking regret this," he hissed, before he slammed your head against the wall, over and over.

Each impact sent a jolt of pain coursing through you, and you felt your vision blur, blood trickling down your face. The metallic taste of it mingled with the tears streaming down your cheeks, a bitter reminder of your despair.

“Stay fucking here!” he barked, his final words a command that felt like a death sentence. He kicked you one last time, a parting gift of pain, before he stormed out of the basement, leaving you alone in the darkness.

You cried out, the sound a desperate, broken thing, a haunting wail that echoed through the empty space. You were so tired, so desperately exhausted.

You felt like a wilted flower, struggling to survive in a garden of thorns, every breath a battle against the encroaching shadows.

With each sob, you crawled to the corner of the basement, seeking comfort in the darkness. You wrapped your arms around your knees, rocking back and forth, feeling the warmth of your blood seep into the cool concrete beneath you.

You didn't know what Negan would do next, but the fear of the unknown was almost worse than the pain you had already endured.

[wizzdot]

The Patron Saint of One Way Trips

Ch 28

I’ve got so many ideas for different fics but need to stay committed to this one as well. Laika is going to have to be brave in this chapter.. time to see her in action!

I had tossed and turned all night, finding it impossible to rest while the rest of my Alphas were gone. Johnny hardly slept either.

When Johnny eventually gives up on sleeping, he moves to the kitchen table and starts tinkering with the radio. I can hear distant cracking and static before a familiar growling sound comes through. I flinch and rush over.

“Johnny! Was that-”

“Aye, lass. I think it was John.. give me two secs. Let me find that station again..”

Johnny finds the frequency and John’s rough voice crackles through. My heart leaps in relief.

“-ny?”

“John??” I gasp

“Love? Is that you..?”

“Alpha! Are you ok.. Kyle.. Simon?”

“We are fine. We thought you and Johnny were dead. Kyle is keeping Simon calm. He wants to kill everything and anything right now. Are you both ok..?”

Tears start welling in my eyes, and I sag in my chair from the relief of hearing the sound of my Alpha’s voice, and the fact that Simon and Kyle were still in one piece.

I zone back into the conversation when Johnny replies.

“-Laika’s shoulder again, she’s not ideal, Cap.. and I’ve got a few marks here and there. She could also be concussed. She didn’t respond for a good couple of minutes after the blast. Managed to get her up and out though.”

“-‘m not concussed. And my shoulder is fine!” I argue, lying.

“Omega..” John warns.

“We need a plan, Alpha. Tell us what to do..” Johnny says.

“Are you near anything? Where did you head when you ran?” John asks.

“I saw a school.. and a church” I reply, remembering what we had seen while we were fleeing.

“Go to the church at 2100, be discreet. We will meet you there. Come armed. Over”

John’s voice goes silent. The radio keeps crackling until Johnny turns it off.

Johnny turns to me and we just look at each other for a couple of minutes.

“What time is it?” I ask, already getting antsy.

“It’s still an hour and a half until we need to make a move” he replies, leaning into my shoulder and taking a long, hard inhale of breath.

“Do you think Simon is ok?” I whisper.

“You know what he is like.. he is probably blaming himself for this somehow… needs his ‘mega to calm him down”.

“I’m not anyone’s omega yet..” I remind him.

“Enough of that, lass. Yer ours” he growls, nipping my neck, playfully, but enough to leave a small, temporary mark.

“Johnny!” I gasp, hand flying up to soothe the bite.

“Jus’ reserving my spot, lass”

I playfully bare my teeth at him.

*time skip*

We had set off towards the meeting point about thirty minutes ago. We were both stiff and limping, something we didn’t really take into account before leaving, not realising quite how sore and damaged our bodies are from the ambush.

“You okay, omega?” Johnny keeps checking in on me every few minutes.

“Yep” I reply, every time, keeping discussion to a minimum, fearful that if my brain takes over, I might yelp or whine at any particularly painful steps or movements.

Johnny can clearly tell that I am not comfortable but he allows me to march on without mentioning it, thankfully.

The church comes into view. Johnny and I stop and watch the area from a distance for a few minutes. One car pulls up and parks, nobody getting out.

“You think that’s them..?” Johnny asks.

“No.. it’s weird that no one’s gotten out though. You don’t think our radio got intercepted..?” I think aloud.

“That’s probably why Cap told us to come armed and discreet, lass”

“I’m not ready for another firefight” I whine, dramatically.

Johnny chuckles dryly. “C’mon, lass. One last push and then we are back with our pack.”

“What if -” I start before Johnny interrupts me. “Nah, shut it. None of that shit. We’ve got this. Aye?”

“Aye, alpha” I say in a small voice.

“That’s my girl”

We step out from behind the building we’d been watching from, and casually walk, hand in hand towards the church.

John told us to be discreet, so what better way than to try and just look like a normal couple waking home? This had to work…

We almost reach the parked car, hoping the pack were sitting waiting for us inside.

The passenger door opens and a man steps out, dressed in casual clothes. I squeeze Johnnys hand.

“It’s not them” I grit out in a sad whisper.

“Just be ready” Johnny warns.

The guy in casual clothing walks round to the back of the car and opens the back door. Just then, a whistling noise comes from the right hand side of the church and the man drops.

“Sniper! Hit from the east, Johnny we need to run!” I shout, pulling Johnny behind a garden fence.

We crouch and I check my rifle is loaded before testing it against my shoulder. It hurts like a bitch but there isn’t really any other option.

“Laika, stay back, I’ll clear a route, then you follow..” Johnny orders.

“NO!” I shout. “You’re not risking yourself Johnny. We stay together.. please?” I soften slightly after my initial anger.

“We have no other choice, omega. Listen to your alpha!”

I sit back slightly, shocked. This is the first time Johnny, or any of the 141 pack had ever pulled rank on me like this..

I gulp and nod, slowly. Johnny looks at me with a strange expression on his face. Maybe he regrets doing that.. maybe he realises how useless I am. A thorn in his side…

He surges forward and just as he steps from beyond the fence line, another bullet flies past and hits the parked cars windshield.

I try to get sight of the sniper’s post. I glance between Johnny’s progress and the rough area the sniper must be.

Johnny beckons me forward then. And I run, as fast as my sore body will allow me to.

“Johnny, listen to me” I pant, meeting back with him in our new position.

“The sniper. I think it’s Simon.. he hasn’t aimed at us once. He is hitting threats. I recognise his pattern. Please trust me on this..” I beg.

“Lass, Simon is in no state to be on snipe duty.. You heard Cap yourself...”

“But - but please, Johnny..”

I don’t understand why, all of a sudden, Johnny is disregarding anything I say. It hurts. It makes me feel like shit. Johnny I’d never like this…

Just then, another bullet hits the brick work a few feet above our heads, spraying dust and debris over where we are crouched. A missed shot at us. Or… it IS Simon trying to tell us that it’s him..

“Johnny. A sniper wouldn’t miss like that. Come on!! Just trust me. Please…”

“I don’t think I can risk it..” he growls. He is clearly at odds with himself. His alpha is fighting to keep his omega safe. That’s when you realise why he is acting the way that he is. He is trying to protect me.

“Alpha..” I whisper, getting close to him.

“It’s Simon in that building. I know it is. We will be even safer reunited. Please trust me. Trust your omega..?” I try, putting emphasis on the word ‘your’.

He pinches his eyes closed tightly, and heaves a deep breathe before nodding once.

“Fine, ‘mega. But if it goes to shit, I’m not up to protecting us both. We are both hurt..”

I gulp, standing, and grab his hand, pulling him directly towards the building I believe the bullets to be raining from.

True to my prediction, if I swayed too far to the right, a ‘stray’ bullet would hit the ground and straighten my course in the correct direction.

“He’s guiding us, bonnie” Johnny laughs, squeezing my hand as we get closer to our target.

We reach the door and Johnny opens it with his gun raised, just in case. We climb the steps upwards, towards the roof.

My stomach drops. I can’t smell Simon.

“Lass.. I hope you’re right about this..” Johnny grumbles.

I feel it before I have chance to process what has happened. I’ve been grabbed and lifted off of my feet. I thrash and scream.

“JESUS CHRIST PUT HER DOWN YOU FUCKIN’ IDIOT” I hear Johnny yelling.

I squeeze my eyes, trying to blink away the fright. I recognise these arms… I turn and see John.

“John?” I cry, as he gently lowers me back to the ground.

“Omega, thought we’d lost you.. well done Johnny for getting you both back in one piece”

“It wasnae me, Cap. It was all her. She somehow knew it was Si up there”

I jump into Johns arms and cling to him as if my life depended on it. I shove my nose deep into his scent glands and inhale. John rubs my back soothingly. “Kyle and Simon..?” I whimper into his ear.

“They’re upstairs, love. We need to get out of here though. We can catch up in the car..” he says as he turns and walks down stairs, through a kitchen and into a garage. They’d parked their jeep in the internal garage so that it was hidden.. smart.

Johnny jumps in the front passenger seat and John takes the wheel.

He speaks through his comms on his shoulder “wheels up in 30 seconds. Special delivery in the back seat. Be gentle with her, boys.. Simon.. I mean you…” he warns.

I can hear footsteps thundering down the stairs with the clanging and jingling of metal work. Simon and Kyle appear from the kitchen and they throw their weapons in the back of the car before practically leaping in to greet me. I giggle and cry into Kyle’s chest and he kisses all over my face. “Missed you sweet girl. Missed you so much.”

He then climbs up front and climbs all over Johnny, happy to be reunited with his other alpha counterpart.

Simon glares at me through his mask, making me feel nervous. I slink away before he reaches for me. He moves some of my hair from my shoulder and leans towards me, pulling me so that I’m straddling his lap. He shoves his nose into my neck and breaths me in as if I’m his oxygen to breathe.

“Omega” he growls lowly.

“Al-alpha..” I whimper.

“Are you hurt?” He asks, looking into my eyes for any sign of deceit.

“Not badly..” I answer, semi truthfully.

“Johnny” he barks.

“Are you hurt?”

“Nah, LT. Few scratches but nothing bad” Johnny shouts past Kyle in the front seat.

“Good. Thought I’d lost you both.”

Simon returns his face to the crook of my neck and starts purring.

I fall asleep in this position, lulled by the steady movement of the car.

John had his eyes in the rear mirror the entire drive home.

“I need to mark her and make her pack. Officially” he grumbles, while I sleep.

Everyone agrees immediately.

I purr, happily against Simon’s chest, blissfully unaware of what has just been agreed upon.

[delta-pavonis]

Fic Teaser: Parasomnia

(The morning after Special Exhibition, so spoilers there if you haven't read it. This little bit is rated T.)

Dear Dream,

Many would start such a note with “I just couldn't bear to wake you…” but, to be quite honest, I fear it would be too disingenuous given that I did everything short of cracking the smelling salts to wake you before I left. I was worried enough that I checked all your vitals. Upon finding you not dead, nor bradycardic, nor hypotensive, nor hypoxic, nor hypoglycemic, I decided you needed the rest.

Make yourself at home. And I mean that truly. Hell, you know where the toys are kept if you somehow feel the urge. (I, for one, am giving my bollocks and backside a break for at least a few days. No regrets, though.) There is barely any food in the pantry because of my holiday schedule, but there is plenty of coffee and tea. Enjoy anything and everything I have in stock. Or just order takeaway.

I left my car here and took the tube in. Keys are by the front door. You are welcome to drive my car to the hospital or get on a block south and ride in to pick up your car. I told the hospital parking attendant to log it under my name, so no rush getting here, your car is safe.

Rest. Go back to sleep if you want. (Actually, drink a glass of water first. We exerted ourselves rather, ah, thoroughly last night.) Take all the time you need. 

I’ll be back about 6 tomorrow morning. If you're around, we can have breakfast. If not, I hope I’ll see you soon. 

Text me when you are up and moving?

Yours,

Hob

P.S. Last night was fantastic. You are absolutely stunning. xoxo

Dream reads the letter fully three times before putting it down.

“Yours.”

Something in his chest soars.

Mine.

He wants Hob to be his very, very badly. 

Probably in ways Hob very much does not intend. 

Probably. 

Dream drops the note to run his hands over his face and flops back onto the bed. The sheets smell of Hob and he turns to press his cheek into them before he can think better of it.

Oh, yeah, he’s proper fucked. 

One hand wanders down to his abdomen, to above his groin, and for a moment he feels Hob within him again and groans. His other hand lands on the bruising on his shoulder, presses softly, just enough to remind him of Hob's mouth. 

Dream closes his eyes and remembers the taste of Hob, his skin and mouth and sweat and cum. He suddenly misses him, desperately. 

Which is insane. 

They’ve known each other–actually known each other, not the weird parasocial relationship he had with Hob via his TikTok ASMR videos–less than a week. How can Dream possibly miss him?!?

This is just the rush of a new relationship. It will pass. It will pass.

But Dream doesn't want it to pass. 

God, it has been ages since he felt this good. Since he had someone respond to him, to his intensity, in kind, to meet him punch for punch. It is what he thought Corin would be, or Calliope, or, fuck, Nada way back when. He thought they could become this. He and Killala had it for one bright, shining moment, before they burned themselves out.

And yet here Hob is, matching his steps, following his lead in this dance, seemingly without much effort, on the first try. Dream is going to have a whole lot of trouble letting that go, now that he knows it possible. 

Fuck.

Dream grabs his phone from where it was placed on the nightstand next to the letter and looks at the time. 

Which makes him sit up in bed like a shot.

It is almost five in the evening. He has slept for over twelve hours.

[drdemonprince]

I went to visit my friend from high school for spring break in college one year. I'd had a crush on him in hs, it was not reciprocated but we remained close. I was also a late bloomer sexuality wise so it wasn't until college that I even would have been up for anything physical. ANYWAY. Decided to visit, figured this was my shot to try and act on that crush again. On the drive from the airport he came out to me as gay so, I figured, that's that. Explains why he wasn't into me in hs and why he didnt really have a reason back then.

I'm determined to hook up w someone on this trip though, so that's always simmering. We hang out with his local friend who is having a will-they-wont-they thing with a guy in their grad program. She is desperate to hook up but he's hot and cold.

We concot a plan to bait him with a possible threesome, spend an evening texting and sending him pics of us making out in a pool. (It's Miami, it just seemed like the thing to do lol) This guy is into it but he's busy that night and nothing comes of it.

A few days pass then it's my last day in Miami, my flight leaves at 6 am the next morning. She calls my friend after dinner like, holy shit it worked, he's coming over now, can you guys get here?

I'm like, fuck it, let's go. I'll bring my luggage and you can just drop me at the airport at 4 am or whatever. Forgot to mention, my friend from hs also has a crush on this other guy, so he's been down to help however he can haha

We arrive, the other guy isn't there yet, the three of us are drinking that whipped cream vodka that was popular at the time while we wait. Dude finally shows up AND HE BROUGHT A FRIEND. Unclear if he warned her ahead of time. Friend is... less cute but whatever, they brought weed. We smoke and dance some bachata and flirt etc...

Tbh my memory gets a little hazy here but somehow she ended up taking grad school guy and his buddy up to her bedroom, and I'm alone w my hs friend, we are smasheddd. I ask him, hey I know you're into guys but do you wanna fool around anyway? And we ended up making out in the bathroom, I tried going down on him but he was too drunk to keep it up so we petered off, then decided to go check on the others bc we realized we left this girl alone w two dude we barely knew.

Well they we having a merry little threesome upstairs and when we came to the door they invited us to join in!

That is how I ended up with my ass in the air getting railed by two strangers while I ate this girl out like a starving person. Grad school guy actually did us a solid w his friend bc that guys cock was huge. My only regret is I didn't get a chance to suck that guy off ;(

Eventually, they headed home and my hs friend and his friend stayed up w me until 3 am when I called a cab to the airport (idk why I ever thought we'd be sober enough to drive). Again, this was Miami but I'm fairly sure I won skankiest person in the supershuttle, which the exhibitionist in me loved. Slept it off on the plane home!

No regrets, best spring break of my life, opened my eyes to group sex and I still got to hook up w my hs crush :) and we stayed great friends!

ANON this is the most late 2000's story fucking ever. pinnacle whipped cream vodka. messily negotiated threesomes. people showing up to the sex party with surprise extra guests. gay guys fucking women. everybody being notionally bi but also not really. near drunk driving. i've been at parties exactly like these. my first apartment in college in 2007 had a pool and we were skanking it up in there miami style all the time. cheers dude

[uglypastels]

sanji and 92 please with fluff !! i love someone new by hozier and i think it fits his vibe !

oh god i got a bit carried away with an idea i had as I listened to the song, so I'm sorry if it's not fluffy enough as I added a bit of drama, but hopefully nothing too angsty. again, apologies.

word count: 1.2k warning: implied smut (18+), pining, smoking, mention of alcohol (abuse?). not proodread.

Spotify Blurb Event ~ OPLA Masterlist

#92 Someone New - Hozier

There's an art to life's distraction To somehow escape the burning wait, the art of scrapin' through Some like to imagine The dark caress of someone else, I guess any thrill will do

Sanji awoke with his head shrouded in clouds of last night’s mistakes. A dull and miserable ache enveloped his body, reaching a peak in his joints and the nape of his neck. His shoulders were cold from the fresh air that had pressed his bare skin throughout the night as he slept uncovered. The bed creaked slightly as he moved to sit up straight. He cringed at the loud noise, immediately aware of the sleeping beauty beside him. 

Her draping locks concealed her face, leaving only the remnants of Sanji’s sober memory to fill in the gaps. She did not do as much as stir as he got out of bed. Did not wake, let alone reach out for him to stay. And he did not expect her to do any such thing. 

As quietly as possible, he roamed around the unfamiliar room for his clothes, eventually finding them scattered across all four corners. With the sun slowly peaking over the horizon, he fastened the last button on his shirt and threw his jacket over his shoulder… of course, not before making sure the packet of cigarettes and his lighter were still in the inside pocket, just to take them out once he had gotten outside. Rather than the fresh morning air, it was the smoke that filled his lungs. A bitter burning that woke him right up. 

It took Sanji a moment to identify the street he was in, let alone the direction to the harbour. It would have been a mystery to him how he had gotten here in the first place if it wasn’t for the fact of how often he had gotten himself in these situations. 

And it wasn’t that he intended it to happen. Never. But when a few drinks in too deep, the sight of a beautiful lady made him weak. It would start with a simple, innocent conversation, perhaps an offer of a drink, and next thing he knew, he was walking the streets in the early morning, cigarette between his lips, appeasing his mind with the blurry memories of the night. By the time he had made it onto the boardwalk, the air turning colder and saltier with each step towards the ship, he had pretty much pieced each moment together into a collage of a terrific night. 

With consideration to his crew, he did his best not to make any sound as he walked aboard and down to the galley. And yet—

‘You are one insatiable man, chef.’ a voice startled Sanji nearly off his feet. His side hit the solid wall as he moved around the shadows to find the source of what was now a fit of bemused giggles. It was only that, in the frenzy, he had still managed to recognise the friendly voice, or else you might have had that smile wiped off your face. 

‘Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you,’ you lied. All Sanji could do was shake his head, now a small smile tweaking at his lips, as he made himself comfortable in his favourite part of the ship. As every morning, he set a fresh pot of tea and took out ingredients for a delicious breakfast, moving around the room almost as if on autopilot.

‘Want some?’ he asked,  cocking his head in the direction of the brewing tea.

‘No, thanks.’ you replied. He knew you were in the kitchen, most likely only to get a glass of water before going back to bed to catch a few more of those crucial minutes of sleep. He saw the empty glass inches away from the sink. But he also saw you lingering about. Like you often did when you wanted to ask him at the last minute to cook something up while he was already cleaning up his workstation. 

But, Sanji, being Sanji, could never refuse you anything. ‘Just spit it out,’

‘Who was she?’ Your question was a somewhat expected surprise. He knew you were thinking about it, but he just had not been sure if you would be blunt enough to go and ask it so straightforwardly. 

‘Met her at the pub.’

‘An unusual name.’ You quipped, placing yourself against one of the kitchen counters. ‘Was she from around the West Blue?’

‘I should have asked, shouldn’t I?’ Sanji grabbed one of the pans and lit a fire on the stove. 

‘No, I suppose not…’ you watched him for a moment. How his nimble fingers prepped everything so mindlessly yet with meticulous precision. Another question popped into your head, and without a trip through any filter, the words blurred out of your mouth. ‘Was she any good?’

‘From what I can remember, great.’ Around you, Sanji had no reason to lie or sugarcoat things. ‘Why?’

‘Oh nothing.’ 

‘Alright, but try not to get jealous, love.’ He chuckled. As he poured some oil onto the heated-up pan, his eyes glanced over in your direction, trying to notice any possible markings that could indicate him right. But you just rolled your eyes at his comment. After all, you had nothing to be jealous about. Not when you got to wake up next to someone you knew and loved each morning. Though, that’s something Sanji tried not to think about too much. 

‘I can’t believe you don’t have a headache or anything. I saw you drinking those shots last night, and it was only 10 o’clock; Gods know what you were up to after I left.’ Indeed, as Sanji himself could not quite recall the exact concoctions he had submitted to under the fiery lights and company of strangers.  

‘You get used to it.’ He shrugged it off, however. What else could he say after years of such ridiculous escapades? ‘And I had a cigarette on my way back. It was quite refreshing, actually.’ The walk was more so than the cigarette, but it was nice nonetheless. 

‘I’ll never understand you, chef.’ You shook your head, smiling, ‘you’d think after the shit we’ve been through, we’d take better care of ourselves. Or you at least, your tastebuds.’

‘You’d think.’ Sanji cracked an egg in the pan, and it immediately sizzled, filling the room with more than just their empty conversation. You wanted to reply, but instead, a yawn escaped you. 

‘Go back to bed, I’m sure someone will wake you up for breakfast,’ Sanji said softly. 

‘Yeah, I think I will.’ And, like many other mornings, you bid him a sweet and short farewell with a peck on the cheek. Just a quick kiss, like a million times before, with nothing behind it but the years of friendships that you both held dear. ‘Smells delicious, chef.’ You commented at all the amazing food being prepared right in front of you. 

Sanji, still feeling you at his side, did nothing but smile. He made himself concentrate on the food, but for once, it wasn’t as easy said as done. 

He turned around, but you had already gone. It must have been a second too late. 

How typical of him. 

the end.

Thank you for reading. If you enjoyed it, please consider to like and especially reblog but also I would love to know what you thought of the story so please feel free to leave behind a comment anywhere around the post. all forms are appreciated :] and anon asks are always open if you're not about that public life.

and if you want to send in a prompt yourself, remember to check out the Spotify Blurb challenge, linked on top!

ok, that's all. yap sesh over.

[warmblanketwhump]

hello hello! after an accidental hiatus, I'm back with an entry into the surrender an ask game that @save-the-villainous-cat and @epiclamer put together where we all swapped asks. thanks so much for doing this!!!

here's my ask: Hi! I’ve become obsessed with your Hero Gets Yanked By An Upstanding Citizen Into Their Window And Into Their Heart post and I was wondering if you could- maybe- on the off chance- if you have time- come back to it for another scene? I just love the duo’s dynamic so much, the lovable hero who is trying a little too hard at any given chance, and the citizen who is wholly unafraid to manhandle a superhero into their home and into their life. That’s the vibes I was getting from their short interaction anyway- I love them so much aaagugfyduhijigififiguftgb your writing makes me go insane” Submitted by @yourheartonfire

The hero checks once, twice behind their shoulders, then collapses on to the rickety fire escape. It's off the beaten path, away from anyone. Sure, there's a little prickle of guilt that it's a Saturday night, and there are probably dozens of crimes afoot that need their attention.

But the past few weeks have run them absolutely ragged. If they didn't know better, they'd think that someone was scheming against them deliberately. call after call, summons after summons, each one more dire than the last.

People count on them—people need them, and they like the feeling of being needed. But they're exhausting, aching, injured, absolutely spent. Their leg throbs with a recent injury that they haven't had time to treat, and they can't remember the last time they slept more than three hours at a time.

They lean their head back against the scarred brick of the apartment building, letting their eyes slip closed....

.....and when a wailing siren sounds in the distance, the hero tries not to whimper.

Get up. It's time to go.

And they do get up. Too quickly.

Their toe catches on the edge of the rickety fire escape, and before the hero can react, they're falling, tumbling, twisting, too exhausted and spent to do anything to stop the inevitable pull of gravity on their body.

The last thing they see is the extended metal overhanging of the fire escape before pain shot through their body, and darkness overtook them.

_________________

The hero hoped that when they awoke, they'd somehow find themselves in their own spase, yet comfortable bed, that the last two months had been just a nightmare.

Instead, they hear frustrated, disembodied grunts and feel someone pulling at them, tugging them over something hard and metal and painful for their aching body.

"Get...in...here..."

The hero wants to swat the hands away, but their limbs are dead weight at their sides, and their voice gets stuck in their throat when they try to cry out. So darkness falls again.

_________________

When the hero wakes a second time, they're aware of a throbbing in their bad leg and a pounding in their head, and an ache that's more painful than anything they've ever felt. They're in a dark room, save for a softly glowing salt lamp in the far corner, and they're aware of being tucked under a thick, soft blanket on some sort of couch or daybed.

It's comfortable, safe, warm—and wrong. They have no idea where they are or who they're with, nor how long they've been there, nor how many lives have been lost while they've been knocked unconscious.

They try to call out, but the "hey" comes out as more of a raspy whisper, and the blanket is far too heavy for them to toss from their broken body. In their efforts to move, something gets knocked over with a crash.

"Hey, hey, hey now, don't move. Shhhh." A figure darts into the room and the hero feels two hands against their shoulders, pressing them back into the bed.

"W--where..."

"You're....here. At my apartment. Figured I didn't want to leave you out on my fire escape all night." The shadowed figure flicks on another lamp and the hero winces, hand flying to touch their face—

Their bare face.

A strangled cry flees their throat. Not only have they failed their city, but someone's seen their face, seen how utterly, desperately ordinary they are beneath it all. This someone knows who they are and could ruin it all. Their eyes flicker up to see the stranger standing at the foot of their bed, holding their disguise tenderly in their hands.

"I'm so sorry....I didn't want to take it off, but you were bleeding from a pretty nasty forehead cut, and I didn't want to leave it too long." The stranger's hand lightly ghosts over their hairline, and the hero realizes there's some sort of thick bandage over where the throbbing is radiating from. "I won't tell a soul. Promise. If you have some sort of mind control....thing, you can even erase my memories, if you want, but you need like....a ton of medical attention first. I've done first aid and an outdoor wilderness survival class a couple times, but you probably need some kind of doctor, but I get if you don't want to do that with your identity and all that...."

"Won't....won't bother you" the hero slurs, trying to sit up again, before collapsing back down. Try as they might, they couldn't leave this cursed couch.

"Oh no, no, you're not bothering me at all. You just sorta...freaked me out, is all. And there was a TON of blood, and I couldn't just leave you there, so I just kinda—" the stranger motions with their hands "yanked you right in here, did some first aid, and here we are." The stranger adjust the blankets, tucking the hero in tighter. "You looked pretty banged up."

I supposed I did, the hero muses to themselves. "It's....been a rough few weeks. But I'm okay."

"You sure?" The stranger's brows furrow, and their hand gestures to their leg. "I'm no doctor, but that gash on your leg looks...pretty bad. Shouldn't someone be looking after that?"

Hero hears the subtext of the question. Shouldn't someone be looking after YOU?

The hero isn't quite sure what to say to that. How long has it been since someone tended their wounds, tucked them in, brought them in from the elements, and asked how they were?

"I'm....I'm alright." Hero's mortified to hear the smallest wobble in their voice.

"Hero, that's not what I asked." The stranger's voice is firm, yet gentle, their hand resting on their uninjured knee.

"Right." The hero sniffles, suddenly unable to speak.

The stranger seems to understand the thousand thoughts of the hero's mind that flood the silence, then gently pats their other uninjured leg. "Well, in that case, it's time we get started now that you're awake. I'll get the bandages, and we'll really get you cleaned up and take stock of how much healing you've got ahead of you. No promises, though—I told you, it's only a couple first-aid classes, so don't you judge my wound dressings."

Hero's suprised to hear their own thin, crackly laugh. "Wouldn't dare."

[lunalockley]

The Limo Driver (part two)

Jake Lockley x Fem!Reader

Warnings: SMUT. Like, a lot. Can Jake on his knees count as a warning?

Summary: It's night, it's raining and reader just wants to sleep, until she doesn't anymore.

Words: 7700+

Notes: Sooooo, I'm sorry, it took me a little longer than planned but here it is, I really hope you like it. And thank you all so much for your comments, always brighten my day.

Specially dedicated to my dearest moon emoji anon who made me feel really good about this one <3

Masterlist

gif credit

So… you’ve been thinking about it. Well, you can’t stop. Of course you can’t. He kissed you once and you spent six months half in lov—Ok, no. Wait, what? No. Half hooked up on him you mean. Three-quarters stupid. Completely insane. But not half in that. No.

Uh, whatever. It’s only been a day, a couple of hours. It’s way too recent. So it’s normal for your mind to keep on spinning the matter. And the eyes, and the voice, and the fingers. It’s driving you crazy, to be honest. The feel of them on your throat, on your hips, on your mouth… inside of you. You barely slept last night, your mind keeps taking you back through every fucking second of it without even trying. And then you can almost hear his voice calling you preciosa in that way he does and everything starts to heat up. That good, nice heat that’s so easy to get lost on.

But there’s also the bad one. The focalized heat that sets upon your chest like a weight is pressing down on you, making breathing a little bit harder. That’s the one you felt when you walked out last night. And you’ve been feeling it every time you think about what you said, and what he didn’t. That’s the part you’re trying to avoid. Yet it comes to mind anyways. It’s pretty fucking unfair.

And it’s pretty fucking ridiculous too because how come that after all that has happened, all the time you two have shared, all the things he has done you still can’t… figure him out? It doesn’t make any sense. How does someone that’s so incredibly hermetic make you feel you can read him just by looking him in the eyes when you actually don’t know anything about him at all? Does he do it on purpose? Is it a calculated move or is he somehow unable to—

—And you’re doing it again. Thinking about it non-stop. You called in sick needing a night away from the restaurant, from Jake’s stupid chair and that stupid bathroom that has been giving you palpitations just by the thought of going in and this is how you spend it. You had planned to cook a nice dinner, watch a movie, water your barely-alive plants, do a beginner's yoga class on Youtube, and maybe even finish reading that book that has been dusting on your nightstand. But no, here you are. Already in pajamas, all you’ve done (besides eating yesterday’s leftovers) is sit on the couch contemplating how time passes with the rain and Viejita’s soft meowing in the background. Is procrastination the root of all your problems? Maybe it is.

Or maybe it’s just time to get up and do what you do best: sleep. Give your body the rest your mind refuses to get. You impulse yourself out of the couch to go and take Viejita with you. Cuddling with her makes it all better. No more stupid Jake thinking. You let your ear guide you, she’s right next to the window. She had never complained about the rain before and as she feels you getting closer she even starts scratching the glass.

“Hey, baby, It’s just a little rain,” you mutter, petting her and trying to calm her down until you rest your eyes on what she is staring at down the street.

What the f—He can’t just—There’s no fucking way.

You’re not sure. You just live on the third floor but it’s dark outside. The street light barely lights anything at all. And the rain makes it even harder to see. Yet the outline of the limousine is clearly visible, and so is the figure leaning against it. But it can’t be. You’ve always thought Jake is unusual in every little thing he does but this? He wouldn’t be crazy enough to be waiting under the rain without a fucking umbrella and without even ringing the bell to your apartment, just expecting somehow you knew he would be there, right? That would be insane. It must be a weird coincidence. Some other limo driver who's waiting for someone else here… in this neighborhood? Weird, yet not impossible.

But then he looks up straight at your window and your heart jumps inside your chest as you instinctively hurry back into the shadows, where he can’t see you.

Fuck, it is him.

What the fuck? He knows your apartment is on the third floor, you’ve told him. You’ve told him the number. You’ve told him everything, for fuck’s sake. It's not like you want him to come up to your house knocking on the door in the middle of the night but what is he doing? At this point, you’re sure he purposefully finds the way to do the least expected, most incomprehensible thing in every fucking little thing he does. It must be his life’s motto: “No matter what, always find a way to stress the shit out of the people in my life”.

He’s an idiot, there’s no doubt of it. The thing is: are you an idiot? Well, yeah. You just saw him outside your place and your heart is already a beat away from a fucking heart attack. But you should try not to be an idiot anymore. You shouldn't go down. Make it clear you said it’s over for good. He definitely saw you, he would get it, and then… and then he would leave. Forever. Yeah, that’s what you should do.

But… goodbyes are a good thing too, right? 

Closure and all that stuff. Talk things out, even if it sounds unlikely with someone like Jake. You can give it a chance. A… friendly goodbye. Ok, yeah. Sounds good. And it is the right thing in this type of situation, grown-up shit. A goodbye, that’s all.

You take one last look at the street just in case you’ve lost your mind and you’ve imagined the whole thing, but he’s still right there. Arms crossed, leaning against the limo and probably soaking fuking wet.

“Your dad’s an idiot, Viejita,” you say to the little black beast before taking her in your arms to leave her on her favorite cushion on the sofa. She settles down, pleased and exhausted as if she's accomplished a hard job.

You grab your keys next to the mirror at the entrance. 

Just a goodbye.

⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆

The bone-chilling air hits you as soon as you step out of the building but seeing him is what makes you stop dead in your tracks for a second. You couldn’t see it up from your floor but he’s wearing his usual type of clothes, not the casual ones that somehow felt so out of place on him yesterday. Now the familiarity of the white shirt, the jacket, and the hat gives you a naive sense of comfort you try to dismiss away. As if this one were more of your Jake than it was yesterday. Stupid, he’s not more of anything and it’s just clothes.

A white shirt, a jacket, and a hat that are drenched, by the way. Which reminds you—

“What the fuck are you doing in the rain? Are you insane?”

Instead of answering he just looks at you and opens the limo’s door. Silently asking you to get in.

Ok, well…. you didn't think this through. You only thought about coming down, not actually getting into his car. But, you guess… there’s no other option. You came here to say your friendly goodbye, after all. Can’t do it in the rain, just like that. And a veil of water drops is already setting in your clothes, you can feel some of the fabric clanging into your body. Another thing you didn’t think through is the worn-out sweatpants you came out with, the old shirt that has somehow become a pajama shirt, and your lack of a bra underneath.

Fuck it.

When you slide into the car you notice how spacious the limousine is yet it surprises you how it does not seem to be room for many people. There are only two rows of red leather seats facing each other. So much space for so few passengers. In order to be more private and luxurious, you guess. It makes you think about the people he drives for. Might he be just as serious and inaccessible as you’ve seen him be with basically everyone else? Or might he show his weird uncharismatic charisma as he has done with you? The latter doesn’t sound so good, for some reason.

You stop nosing around when you feel him sitting next to you a little bit closer than the spacious seat needs. You were right. He's drenched and most likely ruining the luxurious leather of the luxurious car, but he doesn't seem to care as he turns his whole body and attention towards you.

“Is it every day or once every six months with you? No in-betweens?” You blurt out, cornered by the closeness of his body.

Fuck, friendly goodbye. Friendly.

“Sorry. I take that back,” you mumble, thinking your next words before you pronounce them this time. “Why didn’t you ring the bell to my apartment?”

“It’s late. I saw the lights on but thought you might have fallen asleep. Didn’t want to disturb you. You work too much, preciosa,” he answers calmly, his voice softer than you ever heard before. Not in a submissive way but in a disarmingly appeasing tone as if he had come here disarmed, without any shields. Exactly the opposite of how you feel right now. You move back in the seat trying to get as far as you can get in the restricted space. Soft raspy melting voices shouldn’t cause claustrophobia.

“And if I had been sleeping what would you have done? Wait till I wake up tomorrow?” You throw it out half as a joke, but immediately you realize—

He doesn’t even have to answer to know that’s the truth. He had come here to see you and wouldn’t have left until he did.

“Do you always get what you want? Is that how things work for you?”

“If things worked out for me this wouldn’t be the first time I see you outside work,” he says replies, lifting his hat and running a hand through his hair. And to your disbelief, he puts it back with a sigh like he didn't even realize the damn thing is soaking fucking wet just like the rest of his clothes are. He should take it all off before he catches a cold. Ha, go on. Keep thinking of him without his clothes on. Good idea. “Speaking of which, you know what am I thinking?”

“Are you kidding me?” You snort, turning towards him, as shocked by your train of thought as by the audacity of his question. “I never know what you’re thinking,” you whisper, taken aback by the fact that he still doesn’t understand how little you understand him. At all. That’s the whole point here.

“That’s weird, I’ve always felt you can see right through me,” he mutters, frowning at you as if you had any fault in that absurd idea. Stupid Jake. His voice sounds sincere but you chose not to even give it a second thought, can’t allow yourself that right now. Not with the purpose you came here for.

So you cross your arms and frown back at him, refusing to answer anything at all. But he mirrors you, crossing his arms and resting his back against the seat.

God, this is so stupid. You’re so mad at him but can’t help smiling when the stare competition last a little too long. It’s infuriating. And so ridiculous. You came here to say goodbye, why are you smiling? 

“What are you thinking?” You ask, defeated.

A crooked smile forms on his lips in victory, but he quickly brushes away with his thumb.

“I’m thinking you look pretty fucking good here like this,” he says taking a look at your body, his eyes somehow soft and dark on equal parts. You try to ignore the effect his tone produces under your skin.

“In pajamas on your limousine?”

“Yeah, it’s a sight,” he breathes lowly, uncrossing his arms and getting a little bit closer. You can’t take it.

“Stop—don't do that, please.”

He waits for you to continue.

“That thing you do,” you explain reluctantly. “You make it sound like you’re joking but it feels like you are telling the truth. It’s confusing. Tell me what you are really thinking for once.”

“I’m telling you in every way I know.”

The words are out of his mouth like a caress and the way he’s—No, no, no. Focus. He’s flirting his way out. Get to the point. 

“So? Did you come here to say goodbye?”

“Why would I say goodbye?” He retorts like you had asked him the most bizarre question possible.

“Because we are not seeing each other again, I told you it’s over.”

“Oh, it’s over? So what are you doing here?”

“Would you have left if I didn’t come down? I’m saving you from pneumonia. You’re welcome.”

He shakes his head, a reproachful gleam in his eyes but then he exhales and lets it go. He looks out the window for a moment and then back at you. Outside, the rain pounds harder.

“I came to say that I’m… I’m sorry”

“Oh, that’s a first. What for?”

You cross your legs and he follows the movement. Then he shifts in his seat once more, trying to find comfort.

“I’m sorry that I didn’t—That I left without saying anything—I… I just disappeared. I’m sorry. I understand why you’re angry. If it had been you I would’ve—I’m sorry.”

He’s struggling so much one would think this is the first time he apologizes for something in his life. It cracks your walls a little bit, but still—

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

“I just had to go and then I couldn’t come back.”

“How so?”

“I… I’m not able to control my time as I used to, just when is necessary.”

Oh. You weren’t important enough to come and let you know he was going to disappear for six fucking months.

“Yeah I get that, you didn’t need to be here,” you grunt moving to get out of the car but he moves from his seat, catching your hand before you even get to touch the handle. 

“Let me go, you asshole!”

You try to push him back but in half a second he’s resting his knees on the floor as his hands take yours on a soft grip at each side of your hips. He’s caging you between his body and the seat. And even when your body keeps attempting to get out of the car, the intense heat that radiates out of his body makes you wonder how his wet clothes aren’t fucking steaming.

“Wait, wait—hey, wait, stop,” he says soothingly, his voice not a bit altered by the force with which you are trying to push him. His left-hand find that soft spot on the side of your neck, drawing your attention to his dark eyes. You lose a little bit of your strength. “Listen to me. You’re angry, I know. Take it out on me. You’ll feel better.”

What?

Your heartbeat buzzes in your ears and you feel a little lightheaded. This is the first time he’s looking up to you instead of the other way around. Maybe that's what causes that slight desperate effect in his deep brown eyes, the look that the last speaker of an extinguished language would have. Condemned to never truly communicate with anyone else. And the way he looks kneeled in front of you, surrounded, as if he would let you do anything to him right now. Take it out on me, he said. Is he expecting you to hit him or something?

“That’s not how things work, Jake. I’m not gonna turn you into my… human stress relief ball. You just told me you don’t need this. And I wanna make that call too. So, that’s it. You’re an idiot but we’re good. Now move and let me go. It��s ok, it’s over just like I–”

“No, it’s not. Stop that,” he says all frown and serious, and then a little softer.  “And that’s not what I meant. But let me apologize. I wanna make you feel good, baby. Then the rest. Let me have you happy and relaxed first.” 

“What?—That’s n-not—We should talk”

“Oh, so you came here to talk not to say goodbye?”

“Are you serious?”

“Sorry,” he says in an innocent tone like he regrets it but he's actually smiling, the widest smile you've ever seen on him yet. A happy smile. The desperate glimmer turned into triumph. He knows you just gave in, he knows he’s won this one. God, you hate him. Stupid Jake.

“Don’t—” take off my slipper, you try to say. But he’s already taking the other one. You really didn’t think about your outfit at all before walking out of your apartment tonight. Whatever. Focus. “What did you mean then, explain it to me. You gotta give me something here because I don’t want to do this anymore, Jake. Not like this.”

He holds your eyes for a moment and then he leans forward, resting his forehead against your knee. One hand slowly making his way up over your calve, the other rolling up the fabric to expose the skin. It takes him a minute to speak again.

“I… I don’t have control over—I don’t really have a—I just do what needs to be done. That’s the purpose of me. That’s all I do. I prevent things from happening and if they happen I resolve them. I… survive, I guess. And this is how it’s been for as long as I can remember. It’s ok—it was, it was ok. It was until one night instead of going to a shitty bar like I always do I decide for some fucking reason to go into that damn 24/7 breakfast and you happened. I didn’t like it, at first, because I knew right there that it wasn’t going to be enough. I already wanted more. I tried to stop it but I kept going and going. You were always there. Lighting things up. Of course, I kept wanting more. It’s never enough”.

While he was speaking his fingertips were gently caressing your calf, his cheek word by word tracing the side of your leg, seeking the reassurance feeling of skin against skin but as soon as the last sentence is pronounced his mouth starts giving open mouth kisses to every inch of uncovered skin it finds on its way and you’re scared your heart may stop working it all. It’s the feel of his tongue in that sensitive spot in the back of your knee, his left hand slowly exploring the length of your thigh but mostly his words and that impenetrable wall finally beginning to break down.

You weren’t expecting this. You thought he was going to come up with a half-true half-joke excuse that you were going to resist not believing in. And then get the courage to walk away just like you had planned. But this is different. You know this is different. You know he meant it. You know for the way he was so evidently struggling to find the right words, the hoarseness on every one of them as if his body were still trying to keep them locked deep inside. This is him. This is what you’ve been asking for. But still—

“The thing is you’re changing things for me, preciosa. I know I’m not made for this. I’m fucked up, I am. I’m not good. And on top of that, there’s not much I can offer you. I’ve nothing. And I can’t even take care of a damn cat without having it all fall over. I’m not even close to being good enough for you. You deserve better, you do—but I’m still here… if you want me. And even if you don’t, I would still be here, waiting.”

It’s raining properly now, hammering on the roof of the limousine. The furious rhythm of hundreds of drops almost synchronized with the rapid beat of your heart. His thumb hooked over the waistband of your pants, slowly pulling until your hip is exposed. Your breath caught in your throat.

“You deserve better but I’m selfish now. If anything is your fault, you turned me into this. I want you for my own,” he mutters, leaning in to kiss the skin of your lower stomach. You can’t help but gasp at the contact, he’s barely touched you and you already can feel the wetness dripping out of you. “Will you let me have you?”

He’s looking you straight into your eyes now, he hadn’t done it since he started speaking, and you can see how much he just gave you. You’ve learned to know him, somehow. Not in the way one learns to read deciphering signs on a page but in the way our eyes become accustomed to darkness after some time. Groping and stumbling you’ve learned some parts of him, his outline. That’s how you know he’s asking for way more than he’s letting on. You have the feeling that saying yes to him involves a lot more than saying yes to somebody else. The feeling that whatever it is he’s asking from you might consume you and leave you heartbroken afterward. But that’s not the hold-up.

The thing is, you want more, you want to see him in full light. You want him for your own too. But you need to understand him. Fully. You won't give yourself up without having him first. 

“You want me to beg? I’ll beg if you want me to, but then I’ll be the one taking it out on you later,” he threats when you don’t answer for a while, all teasing voice and mischief glimmer, he’s back to the playful Jake you know so well. A little too long of silence and his defenses go up again.

You don’t think he’ll keep spilling truths voluntarily but now that you’ve heard some of them you want more. You’ve become addicted. You need more. But how?

And how are you supposed to think while he keeps playing with the waistband of your pants? Fuck, unless—He just acted on your terms, revealing himself just like you’ve asked him to. Now is your turn. You probably will get immediately caught up on it, but you can try.

You need to play it his way then. 

He sees the change on your face and a spellbound gleam forms in his eyes.

“Show me how it would feel,” you whisper and you don’t need to say it twice.

As soon as the words are out of your mouth the sweatpants are out of your legs. Once he has you only in your t-shirt and your panties he leans back a little bit observing you from head to toe, lingering his eyes on yours, on the contour of your hardened nipples and the wet patch of your panties, as if he wanted to burn the image in his memory, the pervert. Well, you can’t judge, you are the same. Admiring how the white wet shirt clings to his torso, wrapping him like hard candy. You may as well lick him—fuck, focus. Focus.

When he starts to slowly take off your panties you manage to find your voice again.

“I can’t believe I’m letting you undress me on the street.”

“You’re letting me undress you in my car, it’s hot. And its got tinted glasses, and it’s dark outside and you’re with me, bonita,” he answers absently, focused on the delicate movement of the silky material as it slides down your legs. You can't mock him at the implication that you're safe with him though, you know it's true. You’ve felt it from the first day.

Once your panties reach your ankles he carefully removes them to put them in the pocket of his pants. Again, pervert. You ignore the need to clench your thighs together at the gesture and decide to tease him about it. He deserves it. And it’s what has worked the best so far. Pushing his buttons it’s what had you moaning in the fucking bathroom of your workplace anyways.

“To remember me?” You ask as innocently as you can.

But he’s done with it. He pins you with his gaze, raising a thick eyebrow at you.

“Why would I need reminding, exactly?”

“Because this is the last time.”

“What did I just say? Stop that. Don’t make me say it again. You know it’s not enough, preciosa. You know it.” His lips back to your legs, his voice still annoyed but so soft you don’t think you hear right: “Will never be.”

For the sake of your own heart, you rather believe you misheard.

He opens your legs a little bit further and then—

“Fuck, baby.” He sounds so wrecked, you feel weak. You were supposed to do something, what was it? “Voy a despertar soñándote por el resto de mi puta vida.”

“That’s not fair, you know I don’t understand. And tell me… tell me more about yourself first, please.”

“There’s not much to tell. And I’d like to do something else with my tongue right now.”

“What’s your favorite movie?”

“I mean, if I could record this right n—”

“Jake.”

“Whichever you’d like to watch with me, bonita.”

“You drive for a living?”

“That’s how I earn some money, yeah. Stop torturing me.”

“But you’re not just a driver, are you?”

“No, I’m not.”

“And is that…dangerous?”

“Not to you. I promise”

“Are you in danger?”

“I’m in danger of dying as a thirsty man here.”

“What’s your last name?”

“Lockley. Come on, baby, don't make me go crazier than I already am.”

“Lockley… Jake Lockley.” That catches his attention back to your mouth for a second. “What’s your favorite hobby?”

“This,” he says sliding you effortlessly to the edge of the seat. You feel his breath near your core and you know you’re losing it. Shit, why were you doing this? Why are you delaying it when you want it so badly? Oh, right, you—

“Jake, wait,” you breathe. “I need more. I need to understand.”

“Then pay attention, preciosa.”

His mouth finds your inner thigh and he’s so close. So close. You won’t hold back anymore. You can’t. Your hand finds his shoulder just to hold onto something but fuck. He’s still in his wet clothes. He can’t stay like this. You gather the little willpower you have left to push him back. You expect some sort of resistance but he moves back with no effort on your part. Take it out on me, is this what he meant?

The way he raises his gaze is enough to set your blood on fire. He looks at you as if he’s about to say fuck it all and push you back to have his way with you mixed with genuine curiosity about what are you going to do next. Submission hanging by a thread.

“Take off your jacket.”

He holds your gaze for a moment and then he does it. Fuck, the power trip you're feeling right now. It feels pretty fucking good having him listening to you like that. More.

“Now your shirt.”

He sighs and begins to unbutton it, somehow amused by how much you're pushing it. Did he just unblock a new kink for you?

Once the shirt is discarded somewhere on the floor of the limo you lean forward to take off his hat. Is soaking wet just like his hair is underneath. And of course, you can’t resist. You take a moment to run a hand through his curls all the way down to his nape until your hand is resting on his shoulder again. He looks so fucking hot like this. You bite the urge to confess it, instead, you lean back and open your legs a little further, an invitation.

“You can go on, now.”

The little smile he’s trying to bite back makes your stomach flutter. You decide to tease him a little bit more.

“I mean, if you don’t want to…” you concede, beginning to close your legs but you barely get to move an inch before he dives right in and—

Fucking heaven.

You loudly gasp at the feeling of the wet heat of his mouth dragging over the folds of your pussy, his groan sending shivers from your core through your whole body. Fuck, it’s too good. It’s too good. When his tongue swirls around your clit your brain short-circuits having at the same the time the urge to push him away and push him impossibly closer. As your hand finds his curls you realize your body has chosen the latter. The movement pleases him, you can feel his smile against you.

“So fucking good,” he mutters, barely pulling back as you feel the movement of his lips with each word. Your hips move forward anyway, chasing the delicious contact.

Fuck, you’re already on the edge. His mouth is giving you everything without holding anything back. Fixed on wreck you from the beginning, desire running through your abdomen.

“Oh, fuck. Jake, I–I’m gonna—”

“Eyes on me, preciosa.” Is all he says but your mind is gone, every cell in your body focused on the sweet hot pleasure that’s rushing to you core. Your head falls back against the seat as the shocks of ecstasy flow through you, your whines chanting his name, your hand holding thigh to his hair, your cunt clenching hard around nothing—his mouth not leaving you for a second, drowning in you.

When your legs twtich a little too much one hand holds your hips down hard into the seat to ensure you keep still but he’s not stopping, he’s—

He’s—

Two long, thick fingers slid in and out of you as Jake’s mouth goes up, focusing on your swollen clit, licking and sucking and his eyes—

Fuck, you can’t. You can’t. You can’t.

His gaze is so deep and strong, melting your fucking bones. You’ve never been seen like that, never.

“Keep your eyes on me or I’ll keep going until you let me see.”

You can’t help but clench at his words, a whine escaping your lips. He feels it.

“Mmm, would you like that?”

It’s too much, too intense. The free fall never stops inside of you. And you can’t even move away from it. You just have to take it the way he wants to.

His tongue swirls, his fingers curl and you completely lose yourself in the pleasure ripping you from the inside. Your sense of gravity changes to where his wet hot mouth keeps taking everything you have to give. His fierce brown eyes the only thing keeping you grounded.

“That’s it. Look at you, so fucking pretty baby,” Jake says in that dark rich voice you love so much, and though he keeps praising you you’re too gone to even hear anymore. All you can do is lay back against the seat of his limo until your heart stops booming in your ears and air reintegrates into your lungs again.

When feeling comes back to your numb body you find one of his hands massaging the back of your neck, the other moving from your collarbone towards that spot that keeps beating strong under his touch. He keeps his warm palm right there in your heart and fuck, he’s still kneeling in front of you, looking at you with Am I forgiven eyes and you know this is not healthy, this is not how things should be, yet all you want to do is to close your own eyes because you know they’re answering him yes, yes you are. Instead, you lower your head to brush your lips into his, an invitation that makes his body go so pliant on you when you grab him and take him up with you, maneuvering him until you’re on his lap and you can finally kiss him like you’ve wanted since the moment you met him.

That first kiss six months ago was tentative and stiff, it felt like he was trying to stop himself but his body wouldn’t respond to his rational wishes, like his mouth was moving against all his fucking will. Yesterday’s kisses were dark and possessive, every movement of his tongue deliberately planned to have you whining at his mercy.

This one is completely different. This time it’s you who’s leading the way. This time it’s you who’s showing him that the despair that’s so evident in the glimmer of his eyes is the same that’s hidden deep down in your chest. And you know, you know, that the moan that sips out of him when you cradle each side of his face and your tongue clashes into his is because he understands what your body is saying to him. He knows.

And it may be minutes or hours, all you’re conscious of is the constant pattering of the rain against the roof of the car, your own taste in his mouth, the way he pushes you closer every time you bite his lower lip, his fingers under your t-shirt caressing the small of your back, tracing your ribs and digging in your hips, the warmth of his skin, the hard muscle underneath, his damp curls when you run your nails through his head, those dark sounds that come out of his throat when you rock against the bulge inside his pants, the slow, steady bone-melting rhythm that completely intoxicates you until you need more, more, more.

And you know he does too.

He takes off your shirt in one swift motion. You feel something icy at the center of your collarbone but you don’t even have time to process it because suddenly your breast is in his hot wet mouth and his teeth are gently nipping the flesh there and then his tongue swirls against your nipple and—

You need—you’re overwhelmed by the need to have him as delirious as he has you right now.

You push him back into the seat and he’s immediately calling you preciosa and complaining but you are already kissing him, shutting him up, and undoing the zipper of his pants. He growls in your mouth when you palm the outline of his cock over his underwear, your walls clench hard in anticipation. And then he shivers when you slowly run your nails throughout his length over the fabric and you know you’re fucked. You will crave this feeling for the rest of your life.  The feeling of having Jake Lockley trembling with pleasure underneath you. An instant addiction.

You take his hard cock out and you and you don't even give him time to pull his pants out or take them off before you’re rubbing your slit against his length. Utterly and unashamedly desperate.

“Fuck, baby,” he mutters in your mouth, his tight and raspy voice making you throb in need, his muscles tense under your hands. “Feels soo good, doesn’t it? This is how it will feel like, everything, every fucking time.”

He pushes back a little to look at you. You know he’s talking about what you answered when he asked to have you. Show me how it would feel. You know this is his way to push for an answer. A confirmation that you’re his. But instead of trying to find those words hidden somewhere in your chest you get lost in his deep brown eyes and you realize that all those moments when he looked at you like he wanted to crawl under your skin your eyes must have looked at him just the same way.

“Will you let me have you?” The question leaves your lips this time, yet no words come out of his mouth but a breathless choked sound as if you’ve punched him in the gut. Instead, he just grabs the side of your neck and glares at you with something profound that could be anger or devotion, or maybe both. And then he’s kissing you, his tongue fighting yours, how dare you is saying. A hand on your hip lifts you up enough so that he can line himself up at your entrance and just when you begin to feel that pressure—

“If we are doing this you’re not allowed to leave again without warning, Ok? It’s cruel,” you blurt out without thinking, your helpless heart rising to the surface, exposing itself despite your efforts.

“Ok,” he answers, his voice torn and low, as solemnly as he can with your cunt torturously dripping the length of his cock. You look down, ready to feel him inside but he grabs your chin and makes you look at him again. “And you’re not allowed to say you hate me. Ever again. I mean it. Ok?”

“Or?”

“Or I’ll fuck your pretty little brains out until I have you begging me to stop but I won’t until I’m sure you’ve completely forgotten the damn fucking word. Ok?” He pulls at your hair for emphasis and you have to fight down the moan that threatens to leave your throat with the gesture.

“Ok,” you answer out of breath, obediently.

“Good,” he praises, soothing your scalp with his fingertips. Then, cheeky again. “What am I allowed to?”

“You’re allowed to ring the bell to my apartment, for once.” You laugh but then—

He holds your hips as he slowly begins to slide his cock in, gently and steadily but fuck.

Holy fuck.

You’re so wet there’s barely any resistance bet he’s long and thick and the stretch feels like he’s gonna break you in half. The strong grip of your hands on his shoulders makes him stop before he can go any further.

“You’ll get used to me,” he gasps in your temple. “Fuck, such a tight fucking pussy, baby. But I’ll make you get used to me. All of you.”

“Shut up and just keep going, for fuck’s sake”

“Relax on me, preciosa. I don’t wanna hurt you,” he whispers in your ear, his fingers caressing every inch of skin he can find, his tongue licking the pulse in your neck. “Relax…Mmm, that’s it. Yeah, like that.”

It takes a little.  The expert grip on your hips makes you sink into him so, so slowly every inch of him steals a whine out of you but you know it’s driving him fucking crazy too. He’s breathing hard, the muscles in his abdomen jump at the slightest shift of your hips, and a faint film of sweat appears on his neck. It makes you wanna lick him. But you get distracted by how good and how deep it feels and how his hands move from your hips to a playful hold on your throat, until they fall flat on the seat.

“You can go on, now,” he returns your words, a cheeky little grim forming in the corner of his lips as he leans back on the seat. Leaving you to it. Your heart swells at the wrecked and joyful gleam of his eyes. 

You try to say something smart and snarky at him but his cock is buried deep inside of you and you can’t think of anything else, to be honest. You lift yourself up and down, tentatively, the burning so good it has so gasping.

“Feels good, baby? Feels so right, doesn’t it? You know why it feels so right, don’t you? You understand it.”

You pick up your pace, oblivious of his words, trying to suppress the hidden emotion behind every roll of your hips. You don’t want to hear those words, you don’t need to. Not now. But he keeps going—

“You have no idea all the times a woke up this,” he breathes, his hands finding your hips again. Unable to stay away for too long. “Preciosa lurking me with her smart mouth and her —fuck— her pretty smile. Letting me punish her for being too good for me.”

He makes you clench hard around him. You can’t help it. It’s his words, the idea. 

“Mmm, you’d like that. I’d like that too. I could spank you for every time you wouldn’t leave my fucking head, for distracting me,” he growls grabbing a handful of your ass and squeezing it. “How red would your ass be then, huh?”

His hand goes up to hold your hip again. And now he’s thrusting into you. Reaching places you couldn’t reach yourself, so fucking deep. 

“I could edge you to tears for doing this to me.” The pad of his thumb finds your clit and you whine his name in response. The shots of ecstasy are growing fast and intense. You’re gasping, he’s breathing hard. And to your surprise, he keeps talking. “I could have you screaming for—for—”

Before he was forcing himself to get the truth out, struggling to answer your questions with honesty. But now it’s flowing out of him, a little bit of truth with every thrust of his hips. Every word sticking deep into your heart.

“Fuck, I missed you… my whole body felt it even—even when I wasn't myself.”

God, you can’t even process each sensation. And his scent is concentrated in that soft spot on the side of his neck, it makes you dizzy. You’re so out of yourself, so overflowed with sensations and desire, that you only notice you’re running your tongue down the skin of his throat when growls and holds you impossibly closer, just like you wanted.

Is too much. Everything. This is—you’ve never felt anything like this before. Like the whole ground is disappearing under you. All you can do is hold onto Jake, one hand on his shoulder the other on his nape, your face buried in his neck. But he’s asking you something, his voice softer than before.

“Do you understand?”

But you’re too lost on it. You can’t—Your movements start to grow impatient, fast, and erratic. The hot melting pleasure is close once more. But not close enough.

“Preciosa, answer me.”

You keep clinging to him, refusing to do anything but chase the feeling. You’re almost there, almost there, you’re—

You’re suddenly on your back, his body hovering over yours, both of your hands taken behind you, arching you and maintaining you exposed. Making it impossible to hide away. His hand is on the side of your neck, his eyes piercing through you. He’s expecting the same sincerity he has given you tonight. He’s done what you’ve been asking him this whole time—broken down the wall between you two. Why are you so scared to take what was behind it? Because it’ll consume you. It already is. And you know if he disappears again—If he disappears after all this everything it would be so, so much worse. It’s too much risk. It’s all too much. You can’t—

But fuck, he looks so lost in you. 

“Tell me, do you understand now?”

At this point, you couldn't lie even if you tried. Your heart is on the surface.

“Yes, yeah. I-I do. Me too, Jake.”

“Fuck, mía.” He groans between desperate kisses on your mouth, then becomes a prayer that escapes from his lips with every needier, sloppier thrust of his hips. “Mía, mía, mía…”

Your whole body tenses under him then the pleasure rips you from the inside, making you scream this time. The hard squeeze of your cunt enough to push him to the edge. He grinds his cock as deep as he can against something that makes you sob and then he’s cumming, hard. You feel his body shuddering above and you want to see every second of it but everything goes blurry.

⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆

Somehow, you find yourself on his lap again. Your whole body a dead weight against him. Your head tugged in the curve of his neck. His hands moving up and down along your back.

Your body is tired yet the adrenaline is still running through your veins. You can feel it buzzing somewhere inside, that’s why you are surprised when your voice comes out as a whisper.

“If you disappear again I swear that I—”

“I won’t. I can’t.”

You push back to look into his eyes in search of any sign that may tell otherwise, but you don’t find any.

“I won’t be long gone. I’ll be back soon,” he reassures, running his fingertips from your neck to your collarbone, his lips gently tracing your jawline. “Apenas pude aguantarme esta vez. No soy tan fuerte.”

“What are you saying?”

“I’m saying I’ll be back. Ok?”

Suddenly he’s looking into your eyes for some sort of final confirmation that you feel the same way he feels, even if he didn’t confess it with words. And you do. You do, you do, you do, your answer to him. Instead, your mouth says—

“Ok.”

He takes your face in both his hands. His lips brushing yours.

“Mi preciosa.”

⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆

A few hours before sunrise, long after the rain has stopped, you enter your apartment. Happy and exhausted, you know you’ll fall asleep as soon as your head hits the pillow. You also know you’ll dream of brown deep eyes and a raspy voice calling you preciosa over and over again.

As you put your keys next to the mirror at the entrance your eyes catch a sparkle on your neck. It’s a silver necklace with a little moon on it. It’s beautiful.

Your head turns to the window, to the moonlight and the limousine below it that you know won't leave until it sees all your lights off. 

You had never felt anything like this before, you had never been under the weight of an emotion so strong that there was no way to communicate it with words, you had never been able to understand someone just by looking into their eyes. But then Jake isn’t like anyone you have met before either. And there's nothing you'd do to change that.

You know he will be back.

———————————————

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