#yet so busy I’m failing my other club

[bunibelles]

I’m at that point where I’m so busy yet doing nothing 😞😞

[givemeasinglekidney]

Jealousy, jealousy | Oikawa T.

Hurt/comfort

Warnings: swearing

Synopsis: you become Seijoh’s manager after not being able to get into other clubs. After a while you start getting backlash by the milk bread lover’s fans.

Well that was no use.

Every club you had tried for either rejected you or was too cramped. So what now?

You walked around school during lunch. You didn't have many friends, yet the ones you did just so happened to be busy right now. As you were walking, you passed the gyms, more specifically the volleyball gyms. You applied for the female volleyball club but you turned in your application just a tad too late. As you passed the gym, you heard a voice.

“Damn, every one of them?” The first voice said. It was followed by another.

“Yeah. Kinda sucks man.” He replied.

“Man! Why does he have to make it so hard to find a genuine manager?”

“Unfortunately, he’s our captain. Also happens to be our best friend, Makki.”

“You’re right on that unfortunate part.”

You contemplated. Boys Volleyball manager? Doesn’t have a bad ring to it. It sounded hard to get in, but every other club had failed, so why not.

You walked into the teacher’s work room and located their coach, Irihata. You already knew of him from the volleyball team being so famous in the region.

“Uhm, excuse me.” You asked, “Where can I apply for the Boy’s Volleyball manager position?” He looked at you, slightly annoyed after what you said.

He crossed his arms, “Listen, we’re not really looking for any managers currently. We know you really like our setter but our manager needs to be serious in what they’re doing.”

You lifted your eyebrow in confusion, “Your setter being…”

He stopped for a second before answering you, “... Oikawa Toru…”

You paused to collect your thoughts, then it hit you, “Oh! Him! You mean that one guy who injured his knee a bit ago! Yeah I know of him. Never talked to him, but he seems to always have girls' company. I mean good for them, they know their type, but I’m good.”

He kind of stared at you, “Ah… well… I guess it wouldn’t hurt to let you apply. Can I ask if you have any experience with volleyball?” He questioned before reaching into his desk to grab you an application.

“Yes I do!” You said, “I’ve played for all 3 years of junior high. I tried applying for tryouts for the female team but I turned it in too late.” He handed you the application and you bid your goodbyes as lunch would be over soon.

It was the next day and as you got to school you strolled to the gym as the boys had morning practice. There weren’t any girls there since it was super early and you just wanted to turn your application in asap. As you opened the door, you caught sight of all the boys, focused on their playing. You heard a voice call out to you.”

“Ah, I was wondering when you’d show up!” You turned to the direction of the coach. “Got that application filled out?”

“You know I do!” You walked over to him. He looked at the papers you handed him.

“(L/N) (Y/N), hm.” He read your name. He continued to scan your paper, nodding his head every once and a while. “Well, I'd say you’d be a great fit. If you really do want to join, you’re welcome!”

“Really? That’d be great! When could I start?” You questioned. You were kind of excited. You finally got accepted. And for it being your final year in highschool, you were hoping it would work out.

“Well, I don’t see why you can’t start now.” He stated. He then raised his voice in the direction of the players. “Hey boys! Gather around!”

The boys stopped what they were doing and came crowding around. Their eyes tended to land on you, which caused a couple whispers here and there.

“This is (Y/N) (L/N). She’s now going to be your new manager.” He announced.

You took this as your sign to introduce yourself. “Yo.”

There were a couple murmurs of disbelief, and then one guy crying what you think were happy tears about it, until one guy started talking.

“Ah, are you sure you’re not one of my lovely fans who made her way to this spot?”

“No, not in a million years.” You shot back with no hesitation after looking him up and down. False tears ran down his eyes as his friends laughed.

“PFFFT- HA! Get rejected!” A boy with pinkish hair giggled out, His friend laughing right next to him.

Suddenly, there was a slight commotion at the gym doors. You went to inspect it when you got called out to.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you, it’s a mob out there.” A muscular guy said.

You contemplated, but finally moved your feet towards the door. As you opened it, you were met with many confused eyes.

“Uh, who are you?” One girl asks.

“(L/N), the team's manager. Who are you?” You replied nonchalantly. You were met with eyes of disbelief and jealousy. Then, all of the sudden, it was like a light bulb went off in all their heads.

“Hey, (L/N), you're in my Calc! You can let me in right!”

“Hey, You're so pretty. Let’s talk!”

“We sat together last year! We’re friends, let me in!”

You stared at them with a look of disdain. Then, you got an idea.

“What’s the password?”

They all paused.

“...What…”

“Wrong!” You interrupted.

“What password?”

“Incorrect!”

“Listen here you little-”

“Wrong again!” You cut her off. “Man you guys are really bad at this. Oh well, no Oikawa for you. Good day.” And you slammed the door shut.

You turned around to see the team, half in awe and the other half laughing their asses off.

“Oh my god…” One with short, messy black hair said between halfs, “This is great!”

Time skip -

It’s been 6 months since then and you’d become best friends with the 4 other third years. They saw you like their sister, like they’ve known you since forever. Well, most of them.

“(L/N), can you tell Mattsun he’s being an idiot!” A pink haired male shouts. It was lunch and the two were arguing over what color science was.

“Am no! It’s 100% blue!” He shouts back.

“Is not! It’s definitely yellow!” His best friend argues.

“I think you’re both being idiots.” You said with a straight face, “Also, it’s green dumbasses.”

They went back to quarreling as you took a bite out of your rice. Iwaizumi and Oikawa sat to your right as the two others sat to your left.

“Why do you fuel their stupid questions?” Asks the half filipino.

“It’s funny watching them fight over stupid shit. It fuels my entertainment.” You answered. You found it easy to stir the pot with the two.

“Yeah, but they’ve been talking about it for 10 minutes now…” The setter added.

“Okay, watch this.” You turned your head to Makki and Mattsun, “Centaurs have six legs, therefore are insects. Discuss.” The two began to discuss.

“Oh my god-” The setter looked in disbelief and amusement.

“Ima be right back, gonna grab a drink.” You stood up.

“Get me something!” The brunet said.

“Nope, get it yourself ya broke bitch.” You replied and walked off.

You turned the corner to the vending machine. You put your coins in and selected your choice of drink. As you knead down to grab it, a hand comes and takes it before you reach it. You look up to see a girl meet your stare.

“Well if it isn’t the little whore.” She speaks with venom.

This was the part you hated about being their manager, and it wasn’t even the boys fault, it was the girls. You have female friends, so you know it's not all girls, but there are some who are way too attached to the main setter.

“You’re one to talk.” You spit back.

You never told anyone about how these girls would treat you. You didn’t want to cause more commotion or possibly lose your position to problems being caused.

“Everyone knows you're just a manager to be close to the 3rd year. Especially Oikawa. You’re no different than the rest of us. The only difference is you’re actually hoeing around with them. It’d break their hearts to know you’re just using them” She stated. She acted like she knew all your business.

“Really? Cause it sounds to me like you're projecting what you’d do.” You replied. “And I’m not doing any of that. It’s so obvious we’re all just friends.”

Just friends. That’s all you were. Unfortunately, there is a false statement you made. After you thought it would never happen, you managed to gain a bit, just a tiny little bit of feelings for none other than Oikawa. It’s not like you wanted to, in fact that was your exact opposite intention, but that was your result.

“Yeah, sure. Whatever you tell yourself.” She looked at you with disgust. “You know, they probably feel bad for you. You had nowhere to go so they had no other choice. I mean, who’d want to hang out with an ugly nobody? Look at yourself. They’re just being nice. When the time comes, they’ll drop you within seconds. You’re helpless without them.” She took a sip of what was supposed to be your drink. What a bitch.

She walked off leaving you standing there. You didn't want to admit it, but sometimes people like her really get to you. You never showed it, but they did affect you. And you know what they say about just ignoring it? Yeah, pure bullshit. It never works. They’re no longer looking for a reaction, but a punching bag. Someone who will take their punches and not give anything back, coming back the next day to repeat the cycle.

You walked back to the group, no drink in hand.

“Hey, where's your drink?” Mattsun asked, his quarrel with Makki being finished with no answer since they ended up spiraling off topic, somehow getting to how Baby’sRus is a misleading name.

“Oh, they were out of what I wanted lol.” You told them. You lied to them about a lot of things. You felt bad, but it was always due to the treatment you received from the ever so glorious fan base.

Lunch soon ended and so did the day.

You were making your way to the boys gym when you had a thought.

‘Were they just being nice?’ You questioned. ‘No, they wouldn’t, I’m mean to them sometimes anyway. Mean. Maybe I take it too far sometimes. Maybe they are just being nice. They did want a manager, so this is their way of not complaining.’

You tended to overthink, but recently it’s developed worse than it’s usually been. Like a million thoughts running through your head yet you still can't figure out where the music is coming from and why it’s only playing the same 4 lines over and over again.

You saw the doors to the gym… and turned around. You headed home. They didn’t need you. Nobody did. Maybe they’re all right. You’re useless. Unworthy. Ugly. Words hurt like any other injury, but it’s something painkillers couldn't stop.

You walked the sidewalk alone for the first time since you joined their practice. It was quiet. You were going to miss the chaotic chats with them walking to eachothers house. Makki, Mattsun, Iwa, then finally, yours. Oikawa insisted that they’d go to your house first cause he ‘didnt want their precious manager being in danger’ which was sweet of him, but also kind of dumb since his house was closer to Iwa’s than yours. Over the course of the 5-ish minute walk to your house, the two of you had bonded nicely. Too bad you didn’t plan on going back. As much as you loved them, loved him, you worried it was all lies. Their words got to your head and they stung. Then they stayed, but you got used to the sensation.

You made it to your room and looked at your phone to find missed texts from the team. You picked Oikawa’s number to find 2 missed calls and 8 missed texts. Man this boy was insane. You texted back ‘Sorry, don’t feel good, carry on without me.’

Technically you didn’t lie. You really weren’t feeling good, just it was mental rather than physical. You laid on your bed, clutching a pillow as you put your blanket over you. Tears started to spill. You couldn’t take it anymore. You cried into your sheets until you slipped into sleep.

You didn’t go to school the next day. Or the next. You stayed in bed most of the time, occasionally going on your phone or to the bathroom. Other than that you were either numb, crying, or asleep. Every now and then you’d stare at yourself in the bathroom, insecurities rising as you cry out about your appearance. You maybe ate one meal within the 2 days you stayed home, but it’s mostly a blur.

It was the afternoon when someone intervened.

The one

The only

Oikawa Toru.

You were laying in your bed. You had just finished a breakdown, eyes still red. Out of nowhere, you hear someone running up the stairs. You thought for a second you were about to be a victim of a home invasion, being that your parents were home, but you were proven wrong when a tall, brown eyed male swung open the door.

“(L/N)! What’s wrong! Are you sick?” He questioned you. You’d been gone from school for 2 days now, making you absent for 4 practices. 3 after school, and 1 morning.

“Oikawa! Shouldn’t you be at practice right now? What are you doing?” You asked, thoroughly confused how he got in. wait- “How’d you get into my house?”

“Well when our manager is sick, who just so happens to be one of my best friends, I’m gonna see what's wrong.” He answered, taking short breaths making you figure he ran all the way here. “Also, I know where you keep your spare key.”

He looked around to see what state you were in. It had been evident you were crying, despite you trying to hide your face in the comfort of your pillows. He sighed and made his way over to your bed, sitting on the edge.

“Now, tell me what's bothering you?” He said, his voice becoming soft.

“Nothing, just don’t feel good. It’s no use wasting your time here.” You told him, hoping he’d leave. You didn't need his pity. Maybe you wanted it, but you turned it down thinking it was all an act, all lies.

“If you think I’m falling for a lame lie, you're wrong.” He sighed. “What’s going on?”

Oikawa, out of all the guys, knew you the best. There wasn’t a way he’d be convinced you’re okay. So… You spilled.

“Why do you keep me around?” You started, “Why do you care?”

“...What do you mean?” He asked, his worry growing.

“I mean, why me? Out of everyone, why do you guys hang out with me? I’m mean and useless. My management isn’t even good. If you're just being nice to spare my feelings then just leave me. I know my worth and it isn’t a lot. You guys deserve better.” You finished your mini rant with tears brimming at your eyes.

He stared at you with empathy. He hated seeing you like this, it hurt him so much.

“You’re amazing. In all you’ve done you’ve helped our team more than we ever dreamed. We finally found someone who’s dedicated to all she’s assigned to help us with. You know me. You know I’d never be fake with someone to spare their feelings.” He sighed. “I just wish… you’d see yourself the way I do…”

You felt terrible. Your crush sat there as you pathetically lied on your bed because of some emotions, or lack thereof.

“You don’t mean that.” You said, trying not to face him.

He laid down on your bed, right next to you as your back was turned in his direction.

“Have they been bothering you?” he interrogates.

“Who’s they?” You tried acting oblivious, but you both knew who ‘they’ were.

“You know exactly who.” He replied. You stayed silent. He sighed again, “I should’ve known. I'm so sorry.”

“Don’t apologize.” You cut him off, “It’s not your fault you're attractive.”

“Oh, so you think I’m attractive?” He remarks, trying to lighten up the mood.

“Oh shut up.” You giggle. It was the first time in a while you did that.

“What a shame. I wished the person I liked found me attractive.” He jokes. It took you a moment to process what he just said, then it hit you.

“Wait, what?” You questioned in disbelief.

“I know you said you’d never like me, not in a million years… but I can’t say the same for myself. It’s selfish but I really do like you.”

You turned around and stared at him. He stared back, but his mind was racing, taking your silence as rejection. Before he could get up, you grabbed at him and buried your head in his chest.

“Don't…” You started, “Don't leave. Please? I like you, too. I promise it didn’t start out this way but this is how it ended. I know now I look creepy but I didn't-”

He cut you off. Not with words, but with his lips. The warm sensations of his mouth on yours brought you a comfort like no other. Your hands wrapped around his neck, and he went around your waist, closing any gap there was between you two.

He broke the kiss, pulling away to stare at your beauty. “I get it. I’m glad you feel that way.”

“Can we… keep this a secret? Just the two of us?” If this got out, you’d be out for the count. Numerous rumors would start and people would start thinking that you were an actual whore.

Oikawa saw your mind race and put it to a stop, “Of course, I get it. We should tell the others about your situation. We’re here to protect you, you know. We love you. I love you.”

“... Love you too, Toru.” You said and he pulled back into the hug as you head rested on his neck/

“...So you do think I’m attractive.”

Small time skip -

After that night, you told the group what was happening and just like Oikawa said, they stepped in. The 4 of them became your personal bodyguards, not letting any known Oikawa fangirl try and say shit to you. After practices, you and Oikawa would walk to either you or his house to hang out and have little private dates. You were the happiest you’d ever been in a while. You slowly lost all thought of others' jealousy, enjoying your life with your best friends and lover.

[shortpplfedup]

Only Friends Character Rankings Episode 8

Well this was a whole-ass SITUATION. I'm still processing, but another outstanding ep. The twin scents of audacity and desperation hung over this episode. Sand tries and fails to have any kind of backbone with Ray. Boston sits in purgatory and decides nope, hell it is. Cheum learns more valuable lessons about perhaps minding her own business. Nick might be moving on to Zaddy!Papang. Mew spirals. Yo and Plug break up. And Top...maybe set Ray up to get arrested so he could look like a hero? Everybody had the goddamn audacity this episode. Y'all went up for Mew's crazy eyes last week, let's see where the gworls are landing for me this week.

⭐1. Atom

People with self-confidence like you are very charming to me.

OH SIR! Talk about coming in hot! Atom's in an experimental mood and looking for somebody to blow his back out, so of course he thinks of Boston, and he's putting out whatever sauce he can muster to entice him. I gotta say, this is a wrinkle I ABSOLUTELY did not see coming but the mess is MESSING and I'm fully on board. Cheum is gonna LOSE IT.

🔺2. Boston (3)

Alright. I’m a social leper.

Well he didn't do a lot this week but boy did he make it count: his bitchface at Nick, who it seems he might have really started to care about; poking at Top's soft spots; telling Cheum maybe she should mind her own business; and just talkin' gay shit with Atom who is VERY into gay shit right now it would seem...every second Boston was onscreen was a second of perfection. ESPECIALLY the second when he decides to make yet another terrible decision and take Atom home and maybe give him what he's been sniffing around asking for. I mean, has learned not ONE goddamn thing and I LOVE that about him.

🔻3. Mew (2)

You take no space in my mind at all.

I haven't seen a classic post-breakup slut spiral this well executed in FOREVER. When Mew did the line of coke I gasped, and when he shoved his tongue down Ray's throat right in Top's face I SCREAMED. Oh honey, you're SUCH a cliché and I love you for it. Mew does not feel an ounce of anything resembling love or attraction for Ray, and he knows it, and he also knows the thought of him and Ray will keep Top up at night, so cigs, booze, yeyo and tonsil hockey it is.

⭐4. Daddy Dan

If you have a friend who likes old people, introduce us.

Papang has arrived, and he's playing the kind of guy who asks college students he's hiring to hook him up with their friends so...that's all present and correct. They love to cast Papang as charming but also slightly seedy and creepy and I'm very into it. Also, in my country there is a strip club/brothel called Dad's Dan so I cackled for a solid 5 minutes at the previews.

⭐5. Freddie Mercury The Second

I want no business with someone else’s boyfriend.

The only person this episode to exhibit even an ounce of self-respect. I salute you sir.

🔻6. Nick (4)

What should I do to earn your forgiveness?

Nick's licking his wounds and trying to get back in the game with Boston, but Nick having never met a boundary he couldn't trample has pretty much sealed that deal for now. As Sand pointed out to him: what was he even doing at that party, other than making a fool of himself?

🔻7. Top (6)

Are you really picking Ray?

Ok so Top's the one who called the cops right? Because they knew exactly who and what they were looking for, and his #1 priority was getting Mew out of Ray's orbit and back into his. Top's beggin' tour wasn't working on anybody except Cheum (who...girl. GIRL!), but he still managed to end the night in bed with Mew, so I guess he'll count that as a win?

🔹8. Cheum (8)

They're all selfish. They don't care about me.

GIRL. Your girlfriend keeps telling you to LEAVE THESE BOYS ALONE AND MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS. Now you crying on the couch and don't nobody care except your girlfriend, WHO TOLD YOU. All them boys one by one just telling her to get out of their faces...GIRL YOU ARE A LESBIAN YOU ARE ABOVE BOYS MAKING YOU CRY.

🔻9. April (7)

I know you’re worried about Mew. But he’s a grown man. He can take care of his life.

Girl aren't you tired? That woman don't never listen to you and now instead of having a good time you're feeling her snot seep into your chest through your (slay) outfit and thinking about how you're not getting any sex tonight either. SHE DOESN'T EVEN APPRECIATE YOUR ART.

🔻10. Plug/Yo (5)

There were many people I gave all my heart to. I gave them everything I got. There were many people I gave my room key to. They all returned it to me in the end. I don't want you to raise my expectations. And then you leave me too.

Oof, poor baby Plug. He just wants to live that househusband life but Yo been THRU it and ain't interested in going thru it again. I was surprisingly affected by Mom breaking up with Cool Stepdad, given how little screentime they've had, but Jennie's just that good.

🔻11. Sand (5)

Friends? You and I have never been friends from the get-go.

What more can I say about this loser? He's so embarrassing I can hardly look at him. Ray does not give a good goddamn about him, he uses him as a plaything, a servant or a punching bag as it suits him, and instead of throwing rocks at his ass and telling him to GTFO, he FIGHTS THE DAMN COPS who are trying to take him away. It's almost fascinating, watching this bullshit: every time I think this is surely Sand's rock bottom, he goes lower. We've got 4 episodes left but I'm calling it now: Sand is the most pathetic character on this show.

🔻12. Ray (1)

Let's hire a DJ instead this time. I don't want a band anymore.

OH MY GOD FLAMES ON THE SIDE OF MY FACE. Does Thailand do 5150s? Because Ray needs to be committed as a danger to himself and others. He got everything he wanted and IT'S NOT ENOUGH, just as we all (I hope) knew it wouldn't be. And then on top of that Mew refuses his kiss in private but lays one on him in Top's face and it's like he just lost it. That ugly scene, breaking up Sand's encounter with Freddie II (shades of him doing the same with Sand's date earlier in the season), claiming ownership of him (told y'all) forcing a kiss on him because Sand's his property right? Ray was downright nasty this week, and not in an enjoyable way.

[oceanbug]

when worlds collide

smau non!idol ningning x reader

11.5. yoo jimin.

•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•

Senior Valedictorian; Volleyball Captain, who led Spring Hill’s team to their first tournament victory in over 30 years; And the most wanted girl at Spring Hill High.

She was a legacy; no one else could compare to her. Yet she was still so humble.

She still went home every day and helped her mom cook dinner. She still volunteered at her local pet adoption center. She still stayed behind every day and tutored anyone who needed the help.

Yoo Jimin was golden.

 ___________________________________

Jimin’s P.O.V

Three Years Prior, Spring Hill High School

“Jimin, come sit here! Right here! Hey! Over here! J.I.M.I.N Y.O.O” 

Normally, having someone scream out your full government name would be concerning, but not for you since it was a daily occurrence. It was none other than your loud, eccentric friend, Ah Yujin.

“Shut up! Everyone’s staring at you, dumbass.” And there goes your equally loud friend, Y/n L/n.

Everyone was staring at your friends, but that never bothered you; you were used to it. You did, however, dislike the comments that came with it.

“How could someone like her be friends with them?”

“Doesn’t she have the highest GPA of our senior class? And isn’t Yujin failing every course, including study hall?”

“She’s so pretty; she’d be even prettier if she lost that rat pack of hers.”

You couldn’t seem to understand why their opinions mattered. Why couldn’t you be friends with people you like? Why is it such an inconvenience to everyone else? They didn’t know your idiot friends like you did, so how could they have such awful words to say? Still, you walked past everyone and showed a bright smile in front of your best friends. So, if they ever heard everyone’s opinions, you could at least show them that you don’t care about everyone's negative views. It's not like your friends could listen to anything over Yujin’s screaming, but just as a precaution, you smile extra brightly every day.

“I’m less than two feet away from you, Yu.”

“Just making sure you remember where to sit!” Yujin was practically bouncing off the walls; you couldn’t understand where she got all this energy from.

“We sit at the same table every day, Yu.”

“Hey, Jimin.” The same chipper yet quieter voice came from the other half of the table.

“Heya Y/n.” Y/N was always pretty quiet; you just chalked it up to nervousness. Yujin always knew how to draw a crowd with her antics, so it wouldn’t surprise you if Y/N felt overwhelmed by the attention.

“What’s got you bouncing around today, Yu? You’re usually hyper, but it looks like you took it up a notch.”

“She’s acting like she just had four megadoses of cocaine.” You laughed since your friends always had a way with words. You wished you could speak freely, but that would go against your character.

Your character.

“How could you not be excited? Graduation is less than FOUR days away.”

“You’re just excited to party.”

“Well duh? High School was a fucking drag. Of course, I’m excited to celebrate leaving this place.”

“Maybe if you joined a club, or, I don’t know, applied yourself, it wouldn’t be such a drag.”

“You sound like my mother; sorry, we can’t all be perfect like Yoo Jimin.”

That stung. You hated that phrase. You hated being the one everyone compared themselves to. Was it so bad that you worked hard? Can’t they get off their asses every once in a while and help out? No, instead, they’re too busy blaming you for setting an impossible standard. They blamed you for being Yoo Jimin. Fuck being Yoo Jimin.

You couldn’t say any of this, though; it would be out of character for you. All you could do was smile and laugh. You’re Spring Hill’s golden child; why complain about being told you’re perfect?

 _______________________________________

And so,

All your hard work ended up being worth it. You guess? Here you were at the same graduation party as everyone else. Going to the same college as your close friends. The same college as your friend Yujin, who graduated with a 2.3 GPA, while you graduated with a perfect 4.0. The same college as your friend Y/N, who never did an extracurricular activity in their life while you did in 7.

... Why did you work so hard?

Well, that doesn’t matter now. At least you get to have fun and celebrate with all your friends.

Speaking of which, why was your friend Yujin talking to, Wonyoung?

The Jang Wonyoung? What could she possibly have in common with Yujin?

Why didn't Yujin tell you they were friends? You always got caught up with all the work you did, but you always made time for your friends. Did Yujin not feel close enough to tell you? Since you were too busy being Yoo Jimin? Had the image you worked so hard to maintain caused your friendship to drift apart?

Before you had the chance to speak to Yujin, you felt a sudden voice come slithering into your ear. It was Ning Yi Zhuo.

“Yeonjun’s here with that bitch he left me for; it’ll totally make him jealous if we kiss, don’t you think? He’s a total asshole for cheating on me; he deserves this.”

No. Why would you agree to that? Sure, you heard the rumors about Yeonjun cheating. You agreed that he deserved some sort of payback. But not with you. Why would someone like you kiss Ningning? The school’s known rich bitch? That wasn’t very in character for you. That wasn’t very Yoo Jimin.

…… Fuck Yoo Jimin. You just wanted to live life normally; you wanted to drink and curse. Fail an exam. Stay out past midnight and trespass around town. You hated the high pedestal everyone put you on. You didn’t want to be ‘The Yoo Jimin.’ You just wanted to be Jimin.

So, you kissed Ningning.

•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•

masterlist ~ next

(Synopsis) Y/N had never been the type to take life for granted. You grew up with the mindset that if you wanted something, you had to work for it; So getting paired up with the university’s “Rich Bitch” Ning Yi Zhuo for your midterm was the last thing you wanted. Are you willing to step into the world of fame for an A+?

taglist (open): @azraism ; @kimsgayness ; @sewiouslyz ; @winieter ; @llluvbluy ; @i06kkura ; @everydayiloveyves ; @edamboon

[aheathen-conceivably]

🎶 You made me happy every single day, but now, I've got to go away 🎶

Things between Josephine and Giorgio had only grown more tense since she went back to work at the club. He knew that her business had gone under, but she still wouldn’t talk about it with him or anyone other than Zelda.

So every silent answer she gave or glare in his direction was perceived as her inability to rely on him, to simply trust him and let down her guard. In turn, she read his need for dependence as a desire to weaken her, and only continued to push him further away.

Yet still they chased after each other, both threatening to be the first to walk out the door but neither ever really intending to.

Even their usual cycles of fights and apologies had grown tainted by the widening rift and deepening distrust between them. It was as though neither of them really knew if any touch was genuine any longer, or if it was just a way to temporarily end what seemed like infinite hostility with no other solution.

Josephine’s nights weren’t any better. Being back at the club was like being in a prison of her mother’s design, trapped in some sort of distended version of the past where she had lost all of her autonomy again. She could never understand how Antoine worked here; even worse, how he continued to live in the same rooms above where she had so many memories.

But night after night she went into work, expertly pouring whiskey into crystal goblets and eyeing each and every man who spoke to her or any other woman, suspicious of their intentions and sick of their drunken glares.

That night had been no different, so mind-numbingly irritating that she had completely forgotten it was she and Gio’s four year anniversary. She had promised him that she would be home in time for them to have a midnight supper together; only now it was closer to daybreak than midnight, and she hoped he would be well asleep rather than up waiting for her, disappointed.

When she entered the apartment she knew that her hopes were dashed, as she could hear soft music coming from the gramophone in the kitchen. She entered the room to find Giorgio at the table, the half melted candles barely illuminating the pained impatience on his face.

She sat across from him, immediately donning her most apologetic countenance as she explained, “Gio, I’m so very sorry. The club ran late and I had to stay behind the bar…”

Giorgio gestured for quiet, “I’m not here to fight with you, Josephine. I’m here to tell you, to celebrate really…well, I bought a farm out West.”

Josephine shut her eyes to try and comprehend his words. Even at their worst, she never thought that he would leave her in the night, buy a house in some far-flung place and run halfway across the country.

“Josephine, before you answer, please listen. You have too much love and pride to see the writing on the wall, but my love, you must accept what is happening. Most of the old clubs are set for demolition; and you can hide it all you want but I know what happened with your business.”

Pride darkened Josephine’s expression but Gio held up his hand and spoke before she could, “Save your venom, Josephine. I told you I’m not here to fight. I’m serious about this, and it’s already done. It isn’t just this city you see…”

He explained exactly what he had said to Antoine, pointedly leaving out his own involvement with the city’s criminal underworld. Josephine was stunned into silence for the first time in her life. An economic crash? Leave New Orleans? For a bloody farm at that? All she had ever known was New Orleans; but New Orleans had failed her.

Giorgio reached across the table to grab her hand and pull her out of her reveries. His eyes and his grip held a thousand apologies, a concentrated effort of reconciliation for everything that had gone wrong between them, “Josephine, mi raccomando, my love, will you come with me?”

[flowerandblood]

My Best Friend (18)

[modern! club owner • Aemond x fem!reader]    

[warnings: mention of sex, fluff, swearing]

[description: Aemond has his own club and often does business at the home of one of his business associates. There he often meets his younger sister, with whom he develops a deeper relationship through shared secrets. This is slow burn love story.]

* English is not my first language. Please, do not repost. Enjoy! *

Previous and next chapters: Masterlist    

_____

After what he said to her, they talked in whispers for several more hours, kissing and touching. Aemond asked her to repeat everything Albert had told her. She told him everything, unable to stop crying. Aemond didn't interrupt her, just stroked her hair, kissing the top of her head once in a while. 

When she finished speaking, he explained to her, that he had no idea what Alys had said to him, because he hadn't spoken to her in months. He didn't want to go into the details of their relationship because Albert told her everything, but he said that the last thing he wanted was to share her with anyone. No threesomes or other relationships with women were an option for him. Not with her.

He told her about his fear that after the events of 8 years ago he had fallen into a trap and started sleeping with much older women to use them for his own purposes, just as he had been used. That he wasn't driven by any feelings, but by a desire to dominate, a sense of power over them that turned him on so much. 

He felt embarrassed when he told her about this, he stroked her hair slowly, trying to hide the trembling of his hands. She listened to him carefully, running her fingers along his back, calming down more and more. She felt relief. Relief that he didn’t want to duplicate his patterns with her.

After that their confession kept them from falling into a peaceful, deep sleep. They were too shaken by everything that had just happened between them. Every move or change of position that woke one of them made them start kissing and touching again, as if they both needed proof that it was all true, that they really had feelings for each other. 

This led to them having sex once more that night. Virtually unconscious, guided only by instinct, they were unable to withstand the tension they gave each other with their constant touching and kissing. Something snapped in both of them that night. They fell asleep soundly only when the sun had long since risen.

Aemond was awakened by a sound coming from below. He suspected that Klaus had been awake for a long time and was preparing something to eat. Aemond felt that he needed a shower to refresh himself not only physically but also in his mind. He wanted to wash away all the emotions he had felt last night before he went to bed with her. He gently disentangled himself from their embrace, trying not to wake her. He failed, however, her hand immediately touched his shoulder.

"Don't go yet." She said softly, still half asleep.

"I'm not going. I want to take a shower. I'll go downstairs to talk to Klaus and wait for you. Sleep." He said softly and kissed her hair. Y/N grunted in contentment and released him, returning to her dream. Aemond looked at her thoughtfully for a moment. He was afraid that if he confessed anything to her, he would immediately regret it. However, he was surprised to find that it was quite the opposite. 

He felt as if a great weight had been lifted from his heart. He told her he loved her, he told her about his past and his world didn't collapse. He knew her enough to know she wouldn't rush him or judge him, and that made him feel comfortable. The feeling that he could share what he felt with her, because she wouldn't use it in a way he didn't want to.

After a while he stood up, zipping up his pants. He picked up his things from the floor and quietly left her room, heading towards the bathroom. He turned on the shower and slid in, naked, even taking off his blindfold. He rubbed his hands over his face, the sound of the water calming him. The events of last night flashed through his mind. It was only the thought of losing her that made him feel like he wanted to open up more to her. Give her more. He felt that after all she had endured for him, she deserved it.

He wondered what to do with Albert. Yesterday, in that corridor, he really wanted to kill him, beat him senseless and strangle him. If Criston and Y/N hadn't been there, he would have done it. He thought they and Klaus always got the best out of him. Somehow, with them, he was a better version of himself. Maybe because they were good friends.

He briefly considered paying Alys a visit and warning her that if she went near Y/N, he would strangle her with his own hands. But he was afraid that this was what she and Albert wanted. Him to go to her place, so Albert could tell Y/N later that they were doing something different than what was really happening there. Aemond feared it was a trap. He exhaled loudly, deciding that now he had to focus on her, not the people he despited. At least until he comes up with something.

When he was done, he went down the stairs. He saw Klaus pouring his coffee. Klaus looked at him displeased.

"I asked you to let me sleep. Because of you, I kept waking up." He said frustrated, taking a sip from his cup. Aemond looked away, embarrassed.

"Sorry." He just said, not knowing what to answer. He suddenly remembered that Klaus didn't know anything. 

"Yesterday Albert pestered Y/N after she went to the restroom." He said slowly, looking at him again. "I smacked his face, but I suspect it won’t help."

Klaus stopped drinking and swallowed hard.

"Where the hell did he come from?" He asked nervous and disgusted.

"He came with Alys." Aemond replied shortly without even looking at him.

Klaus closed his eyes for a long moment.

"Fuck." He just said opening his eyes and staring at him. "Is Y/N..."

“He told her everything. That's why I wanted to stay with her last night. To comfort her." He said, trying to explain his actions somehow, but he had a feeling that it sounded worse than he wanted.

"Comfort her? By fucking her all night so she wouldn't accidentally ask unnecessary questions?" Klaus asked annoyed, putting his cup down aggressively on the counter. Aemond frowned and pursed his lips. He debated whether to say it or not. Klaus, after all, was his friend too.

“I confessed my feelings to her yesterday. I confessed that I’m in love with her." He finally said looking away. “I also told her about Alys and the other women. I told her everything.” He touched his tongue to his cheek, trying to escape the embarrassment that overcame him. He wasn't sure Klaus would believe him.

They looked at each other, Klaus staring at him intensely as if trying to decide in his head whether to believe him or not. There was a long silence.

"Did you really tell her that?" He asked after a moment, as if to make sure he understood correctly. Aemond sighed, tired of this conversation.

"Yes."

Klaus ran a hand over his face, taking a few steps back and forward around the kitchen. He took another sip of coffee, but the tension seemed to leave him. He sighed, shaking his head as if he couldn't believe what was happening. He changed the subject.

"What are we going to do with him? He’s is getting more and more cheeky. He's spying on her and you and me. He's probably going to get Criston's ass in no time." He said impatiently, looking to the side, thinking hard.

“I would like to meet Marcus, alone, in his office. Can you make us an appointment?” Aemond asked. Klaus looked at him surprised.

"I can." He said uncertainly. "For when?"

"For today."

***

Y/N woke up terrified. She wondered why she was naked and not in her pajamas. She looked around the room and slowly began to remember the whole of last night. She remembered his confession and their long conversation, or actually, his monologue. When she remembered what they had been doing next until the morning, she felt that her face was literally scarlet. And what he whispered in her ear as he thrust in her again and again.

"I love you."

She pushed the thought away as she got up. She wanted to get dressed as quickly as possible to see if he was really waiting for her downstairs or if she had just dreamed it. She wasn't sure what was real and what was her imagination anymore. 

As soon as she put on a shirt and shorts, she ran downstairs and peeked into the living room. Aemond and Klaus were sitting on the couch with coffee in hand, talking about something, when they heard her, they both looked at her.

"Hey, someone's finally resurrected. You left your classes today." Klaus said sarcastically as he stood up and walked over to her. He touched her arm, as if physically wanting to make sure she was okay.

The gesture touched her. She always thought in moments like this that her love for him was boundless. She looked pleadingly at him.

"Please, let me be. I'm a human wreck." She said squeezing his arm in response.

"I see. Will you eat something? I can make you some lettuce, tomato, and radish sandwiches.” He said calmly. He knew it was her favourite. She smiled warmly at him.

"Yes, please." He pinched her arm and went into the kitchen. Y/N sat next to Aemond, who watched them through the entire exchange. Before she even had time to say anything, he automatically put his arm around her, transferring the coffee to his other hand. Y/N, feeling exhausted, just laid her head on his chest, wanting some comfort. Aemond grunted contentedly and ran his fingers through her hair and back. They both closed their eyes, sitting in silence, hugging each other.

Klaus glanced at them as he was slicing tomatoes. He would never have expected Aemond to take an interest in his sister. Like the others, he thought he was only interested in older women. When Y/N told him about what they were doing the morning after his birthday, he was furious. He didn't want it to be some kind of experiment for Aemond, a test to see if he might enjoy screwing girls younger than himself as well. He resented him for choosing his sister, knowing how much he loved her and how close he was with her.

But watching them from the sidelines during time, he began to see that Aemond acted differently around her. He was calmer, his expression softened. Sometimes he even smiled. Then he began to think that maybe it wasn't quite what he thought. Now, as he looked at them, he felt at last at peace. He knew that if things didn't work out between them, at least what was between them now was sincere.

***

It took Aemond hours to get together, rushing to meet Marcus. He told Y/N that he wanted to talk to him about things associated with his club, but both she and he knew that wasn't true. Y/N was afraid he was planning to do something to Albert, and Aemond didn't want to admit that was exactly what he had in mind. He knew he would never let that son of a bitch go. But he didn't want to add to her worries after what she'd been through yesterday. They said goodbye at the door. Embracing her, he kissed her tenderly and warmly, her scent filling his nostrils.

"I love you." She whispered softly, almost inaudibly, looking at him with her big, bright eyes. Aemond smiled almost imperceptibly and kissed her forehead. He felt completely at peace.

He was driving through the city during rush hour, there were traffic jams everywhere. Marcus's office was in the center of the city, in one of the large office buildings that looked like his father's. However, he managed to get there on time. 

He went inside. The secretary greeted him with a flirtatious smile. She offered to show him the way, and he nodded. She was saying something to him as they walked down the hall, but he wasn't listening, deep in his own thoughts. When he saw a door with a sign with Marcus's name on it, he simply opened it and went inside, not paying attention to the fact that the woman was still talking to him. He closed the door behind him.

Marcus's office was impressive. It was big and spacious, you could feel your breath in it. There were lots of plants around him, and his desk was wooden and heavy. In front of it were two very comfortable looking armchairs. One of the walls was just big windows that looked out to other big skyscrapers.

"There you are. Sit down, please." Marcus said, putting down the papers he just had in his hands. “I was surprised by your sudden request and I don't have much time for you. What is it about? I heard Albert started pestering Y/N more directly?" He asked, immediately betraying that Klaus had told him about the whole situation so that Aemond wouldn't waste time on pointless explanations.

Aemond sat in the chair, crossing his legs. He tapped his fingers against the armrest. There were photos on the wall behind Marcus. Probably him and his parents, him and Klaus and Y/N's father, him and some pretty, smiling blonde who he guessed was Laura. There was also a picture of him and Y/N hugging and smiling, her head resting against his shoulder.

"I want to teach him a lesson. Once and for all. But I need your contacts." He said finally, glancing at Marcus. You could see in his eyes that he was serious. His face was stone.

Marcus looked at him for a moment, thoughtful.

"And who do you want to do this for? For her or for yourself?" He asked, raising his eyebrows.

"For both of us." He replied dryly, glancing to the side impatiently. He thought Marcus was an intelligent man, but he didn't need lecturing right now. “He told me what new drugs he had started selling to the mafia. His people have to pick up the goods somewhere. I want to find out where and send the police on them." He finally said, glancing at him intensely.

Marcus sighed.

"If it had been about Albert himself, I would have helped you. But think of his less pleasant colleagues. They can do more to Y/N than poke in front of the restroom at a party. They know she is your weak point. They'll rape her and leave her outside your club. If you think you can protect her from them, you're wrong." He said shaking his head. Aemond swallowed hard at the thought.

"Listen to me." Marcus started. Aemond moved to protest and express his anger, but Marcus didn't let him speak. "Listen."

Aemond let go, exhaling impatiently through his nose. He looked at him expectantly.

"You don't have a monopoly on love for her. Klaus loves her. Me too. If you think I love her less than you, you're wrong." He said, something in his voice that made Aemond shiver. The mood in the room changed. "I've done a lot of bad things. I've helped a lot of bad people. Worse than you, Albert, or even his mob morons. These are fucking hurdles. Do you understand? They don't mean anything. But stir the water and the big fish will come out, and then you'll see what happens." He said, tilting his head to the side. Aemond swallowed hard. "Take care of her. Take care of your club. Realize at last how much you have to lose."

_____

For all of you who were looking forward to their conversation after the last part. Kisses!

If you want to be tagged, just leave a comment. ~

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[pink-heart-jam]

Enemies to lovers, anyone? 👀

Enemies to lovers is always peak mlm material! This has always been one of my favourite tropes in fic and it couldn’t be any different when it comes to BL. School/office rivalry, fuck buddies, revenge, toxic obsession, unhinged mythological wars… this list has a little bit of everything and I’m sure you’ll find something especially crafted for your tastes. Get ready for that delicious angst + hate intense sex combo and enjoy!

Checkmate by Tan (E)

Soohyun doesn’t have a “first love,” but he definitely has a “first hate” - his high school classmate Eunsung. A smooth-mannered all-star, Eunsung snaps up first place in everything, leaving Soohyun always trailing behind in second place.

Ennead by Mojito (E)

The once peaceful land of Egypt has been stained with blood under the tyrannical rule of Seth, the god of war. Horus, son of the god Isis but not yet one himself, rises to challenge the throne and put an end to the chaos and destruction.

Glasses Cloth and Playlist by Gwak jongpil (E)

Two people in the catalogue department fall in love, get quickly married, and emigrate to another country, leaving their positions to be filled by new recruits Bada Lee and Seomin Hyun.

Out of Control by Bboong (M)

The story depicts the school life of 2 different guys: Yuri, considered as the school's most handsome guy who hates ugly people, always followed by crowds of girls but always extremely cold and distant towards them, and Jaerim, the school's ugliest guy.

Park Hanhoo's Manager by Kim Tac (M)

Chansol never experienced friendship before he met Park Hanhoo, a troubled boy who terrifies school gangs and hides his face with an unruly haircut. But when a horrific event turns Chansol's world upside down, he is forced into hiding and reneges on his promise to stay by Hanhoo's side.

Part-time Partner by Cherrymanju, Ilyoil (E)

Kyuho has become smitten with the new club member, Yoongun. Not only is his face gorgeous but there’s something about the way he stands his ground confidently. When, out of the blue, Yoongun says “you’re not my type”, the two start a love-hate relationship for the ages.

Semantic Error by J. soori, Angy (E)

Sangwoo Choo is a stickler for rules. So when his classmates free-ride on a group project, he doesn't credit them. But this prevents one senior, Jaeyoung Jang, from graduating. And like oil and water, Sangwoo and Jaeyoung don't mix. Can Sangwoo debug Jaeyoung – a semantic error in his perfect life?

Steel Under Silk by Snob (E)

Yeonjo used to have it all: a highly respected family, a kind brother, and a comfortable life. Now, with his father executed for high treason, his last kin dead, and damned to a lifetime of slavery, Yeonjo has nothing to lose. All that is left is vengeance, and his chance comes when the new governor assigned to the region is none other than Kwon Hee-ryang, the man who destroyed everything Yeonjo loved.

The Foul by Chepali, Joo (E)

Ever since inheriting his father’s debt as a teenager, Joo Hawon has been doing whatever it takes to buy his freedom back, whether that means working as a VIP dealer in the casinos of Macau, or taking other riskier jobs. But when a mysterious casino guest offers to pay off his debt if he successfully finishes a job on a cruise ship, it’s too good an offer to turn down–despite his instincts warning him of obvious danger.

You Get Me Going by Moscateto, Oh doyeon (E)

Not even if he were the last man left on Earth! Youngwon yearns for true love, but his overbearing nature always leads to failed relationships. Lately, he finds himself clashing with his polar opposite, Hyunwoo, at work. However, things heat up when they go on a business trip together. Will these sparks of enmity turn to love?

[imdoingsortagay]

Mommy Agatha and the brownie Incident

Summary: Agatha makes her famous batch of brownies for the neighborhood bookclub with a ✨ twist ✨

Warnings: R calling Agatha mommy, Soft!Mommy Agatha, fluff, a bit of crack, edibles,

Word Count: 1.3k words.

a/n: thanks to @wandakink , @tr333sus, and others for helps on this as I have no goddam experience lol, enjoy !!!

“Mommy?” 

She assumed that you were napping after a busy morning of classes so she had started on some of the orders for the neighborhood ladies. 

What you thought was some regular baking by her ended up being Agatha spending two hours making some edibles for all the women in her book club. Who knew that a group of housewives would go crazy over her cookies with the special butter? 

“Are you baking without me ?” you pout at her and she is unsure of her magic thank god to stop you from seeing what she’s up to. She prided herself in making edibles away from you and she was not in the mood to have to explain to you what she was doing. 

“Well I’m baking for all of my friends in the book club honeybee, we have a meeting tomorrow about this month's book,” she explains as she quickly gets the brownie batter in the tin to bake in the oven. 

It’s her signature brownie resource with an added twist for the ladies but to your sweet innocent soul it looked like a regular batch of brownies she’d make every once in a while. 

“Can I have some Mommy?” You ask nicely, barring your eyelashes for added effect at your girlfriend that sadly fails. 

“ how about you help me clean some dishes for me then honeybee?” She asks you and you pout before leaving the kitchen to the living room, Agatha uses her magic to quickly clean up the mess while her brownies are baking.

“ you pouting in the living room like always ?” 

“ noooooooooo Aggie,” you tell her before she scoops you up in her lap for some cuddles, a highlight of each of your days. 

“ I know you too well by now to not know you,” she giggles,” how about the two of us head to the bedroom to take a nap, Mommy needs one after the baking she did today”. 

“Why would baking be tiring for you, Aggie? You have magic to help you speed up the process?” You ask her with curiosity as she giggles.

“ my honey,” she says, “ you have no idea".

Agatha had fallen asleep with you in her arms after she had let the brownies cool down in the kitchen while you had been forming a plan to eat the delicious dessert. 

You slowly slipped out of the woman's embrace and placed one of your plushies in place so as to not make her worry. 

Agatha’s famous brownies never failed to cheer you up and the older woman would not be mad if you decided to take at least one for yourself.

  She could always just make more so the ladies wouldn’t be mad at her. The closer you got to the kitchen the more excited you got, only craving what you consider to be a favorite thing of hers. Agatha might not be able to cook but she can go hard in the baking department. 

The brownies were in their container, not yet cut and you did the honor of cutting them up to make 9 somewhat nice pieces. The first piece of the chocolate dessert was heaven in your mouth and you suspected nothing weird about them. What you didn’t know was your lovely girlfriend had woken up by the time you made it into the kitchen, wondering where you even went and so she decided to look around the house. She was shocked to see that you had made it to the brownies before she could pack them up. 

“ Honey bee,” your girlfriend announces as she sees you eating the brownies, unaware of the chaos you just unleashed. 

In the two years that you and the older woman were in a relationship, she knew that you had no experience with drugs and you didn’t have much experience with alcohol too. The last time you had gone out without her, Kate had to drag you home from the bar while you were rambling about how hot Agatha was. 

“ KATEEEEEEE” you say as the brunette woman is driving you home, expecting to have a chill day at the bar until Yelena had dared you to drink a bunch of shots. 

“ What?” Kate asks you. 

“ I can’t wait to go see Agathaaaa, she’s so hot,’ you pause,” like she’s a milf goddess Kate bait like you don’t know” 

“ Did you just call me Kate bait”? 

“ KATE BAIT SHE ALSO HAS SNACKS, I WON A MILF WHO HAS SNACKS,” you cheer as Kate drives into Agatha’s driveway to drop you off.

All Agatha wondered was how your body would react to the thc of the butter that she used compared to the effect that alcohol had to it.

“ Did you eat the brownies that mommy told you not to eat? “ she says as she talks in her strict voice. 

“ They kind of just showed up in my mouth”. 

“ Really now ?” 

As you shamelessly continue to eat the brownie, your girlfriend makes her way to the pan to see that two pieces are missing and tries to hold in her laughter before she’s met with you behind her. 

“I want chips, Aggie,” you start to ramble,” and a milkshake, ohhhhhh yeah pls we can go to Mort's ice cream shop he makes the best and always adds a cherry on top” 

Agatha covers your mouth as a means to stop you from talking and she laughs at the fact that she’s got a long day ahead of her. 

“ y/n?” she asks you while slowly removing her hand from your mouth. 

“ No nicknames? wait am I in trouble? Wait did Wanda tell you about how she almost gave me one of her cat’s kittens? ” 

“ No superstar,” She says calmly,” we’ll talk about the kitten thing later but Mommy needs you to tell me just how many brownies you had”.

“ 2 and I almost had another one, before you stopped me of course,” you say happily as she puts the brownies away from your view. 

“ Honey you had pot brownies,” she says,” Mommy didn’t tell you because I also said they were for the book club!!!”

“ my bad,” you whisper, feeling a bit bad that she spent all morning making these brownies that weren’t for you in the first place. This was your first actual experience with edibles, she probably didn’t want to stress about how you'd react to it.

“ It’s okay my sweet honeybee,” she tells you in her kindest voice, the one that brings you comfort in your hardest days,” Mommy is gonna be here to take care of you while you get to experience what it’s like to be high!!!” 

“ Fun times for the both of us’ the older woman thinks to herself. 

Agatha was hoping that with the amount of THC in those brownies, it would be easy to handle you in a high state.

And she was right about that as she got to see you deal with the munchies and lucky for her, Agatha had gone grocery shopping the day before so she didn’t need to order some snacks. 

“ Mommy look at this,” she hears you say as the both of you are sitting in your shared bedroom on a rewatch of some cartoon from the 90s,” this Cheeto is shaped like a Y!!! WOW”. 

“ And I’m just gonna Nom,” Agatha says before taking the chip in her mouth, leaving you shocked that she dared to take your special chip. 

“ RUDE AGGIE” and you fall on the bed dramatically,” now I don’t have more snacks, what the heck Aggie?” 

“ Did my baby just cuss ?” 

And before you even try to explain yourself, Agatha starts to tickle you to make you giggle, the rest of the night is spent with Agatha holding you in a warm embrace, happy to be able to have such an adorable and great girlfriend like you.

[beewolfwrites]

The Oar in the Sand - Chapter Nineteen: The Jack

Sorry for the delay! I had a bit of a busy week, but it was unavoidable. I know some of you were annoyed and worried about MC's actions earlier in the game, and here we are haha.

Let me know if you see any errors! I'm a terrible proofer.

AO3 link is here. 

____________________________________________________

Once the seed was planted, the poison had spread quickly. 

By Round Three, the group had eliminated the nervous man in the checked shirt. It was exactly as I’d predicted, and equally as heartbreaking. That woman, Urumi, was a cold-blooded ringleader. She had the others wrapped around her finger, controlling who would be taken out next, and embedding paranoia and distrust into the very group she created. The others were too submissive, too afraid, to disagree. 

Even watching from afar with Banda and Enji, I could see the fear festering between them. Ippei, having taken a more observant role with Chishiya, was in a near-constant state of silent shock.

Round Four, it was the woman with long hair and a floral skirt. She had entered into the cell next to my own, and as the timer ran out, the sudden blast of her collar had shaken me to my core. During the next round, there was no obvious target. However, the woman in an orange shirt suddenly disappeared from the board, her face vanishing along with her life. Likewise, one or two of the other players from the pairs and trios disappeared silently. 

By the time Round Six began, I already had a nagging suspicion that Chishiya and Ippei were telling each other their suits in secret. Clearly, he trusted Ippei, and so did I. Having a partner that you could trust without fail was the key to winning this game. 

However, I had also noticed that Banda and Enji had yet to lie to me. I would always double check with Chishiya. Not directly, of course. But whenever I entered the guardroom, or walked across the cafeteria, I would spare a quick glance in his direction. He would tap his fingers on whatever was near him at the time; the tabletop, his knee, his arm if he had them crossed. To anyone else, it would look like a nervous habit. But his fingers switched from one steady tap - Diamond - to four consecutive taps - Club - all without ever looking directly at me or making it obvious what he was doing. 

And yet, every round that followed, his secret messages would only certify that Banda and Enji had told me the truth.  

But why?

‘I guess the only people who are safe are the pairs,’ I mumbled under my breath. 

Banda hummed. ‘What’s that?’ 

‘ああ、 何でもないです,’ I whispered. It’s nothing. 

It was now Round 10. Ten hours of sleepless torment in this concrete labyrinth. I was sitting on the guardroom floor beside Banda. Enji was standing against the wall, playing with a wrapped cookie in his palm without actually eating it - the same brand yet again. The night was passing painfully slowly, and it had to be the early hours of the morning. Yet with every round, the tension between the players only heightened, like a coil ready to snap at any moment.

Banda was staring intently at the group across from us. Or what was left of it. Aside from Chishiya and Ippei, the group had whittled down to just Urumi, the old man, the young woman with the headband and the man with glasses. In the previous round, both Hawaiian Shirt and his partner had been eradicated together. 

They must have lied to each other. 

Now, there were only ten players remaining in the game, most of us lingering here in the guardroom and refusing to look at one another for too long. 

Banda made a noise of discontent. ‘That person,’ he said. ‘Perhaps he’s the Jack.’ 

I followed his blank gaze, a lump in my throat rising as I realised exactly who he was talking about. ‘違う,’ I said. ‘ジャックじゃないです.’ You’re wrong. He’s not the Jack. 

Banda smiled softly. ‘And how would you know?’ 

Has he figured us out?

I tried to explain that I had seen Chishiya in the games before, and how we were both part of the Beach, though it was a struggle to form the right sentences. ‘あの人もビーチのグルプにありました,’ I said. That person was also in the Beach’s group. 

I knew I must have butchered the sentence structure, or used the wrong particles in the wrong places. But Banda seemed to know what I meant as he simply ignored my story without comment. 

Eiji played with the cookie in his hand. ‘The Beach, hm? Sounds like a cult.’ 

‘そうでした.’ It was. 

Ever since our first meeting, Enji had eased up a little. He no longer nitpicked my shoddy Japanese, and for the most part he ignored me. I didn’t mind too much since I wasn’t really in the mood to make conversation. The exhaustion was beginning to affect me physically. It was a struggle to keep my eyes from closing, especially as the unnatural lighting within the prison jarred against the darkness outside. My joints and bones ached from sitting on the cold concrete floor, and my head was pounding, thirsty for sleep. 

The timer below the board ticked and ticked. There were still 17 minutes left of Round 10 when Banda stood up, smoothing out his clothes. 

‘I’ll be back,’ he muttered, then left me with Enji. 

He disappeared in the direction of the toilets, rounding the corner to the stairwell just as Yaba’s partner entered the guardroom. According to the board, her name was Kotoko. She walked around the room, clutching something in her hands - the usual cookie brand, bright red this time. As she passed where Enji and I were standing, her eyes flitted across to Enji’s cookie, filling with recognition for just a split second. Then she vanished, probably in search of Yaba. 

I laughed lightly. ‘あなたは両方ともそれのクッキーが好きに違いない.’ You both must really like those cookies. 

Enji tore open the packet in his hand. He ate the cookie in one go, fist clenching around the empty wrapper. Then without a word, he stalked off in the same direction as Banda. 

Jeez… What’s gotten into him?

And there I was thinking we were allies now.

I shook it off, diverting my attention back to the group. Headband was shivering, her eyes darting back and forth. The older man had turned pale, clutching his stomach with nausea. Meanwhile, Glasses was scratching his head and pacing back and forth, and Urumi was leaning against the wooden bar, waving around a pocky stick as she assessed the participant board. Several paces behind them, poor Ippei was sitting on the ground, head in his hands, the bags under his eyes more pronounced than ever before. Chishiya, of course, was leaning against the wall, arms folded calmly. 

His fingers tapped twice, paused, then tapped twice again. 

I was a Heart. 

He could have seen my suit earlier when I was down in the cafeteria. The group had been exchanging their suits, the old man struggling not to vomit from the stress of the game. As I was browsing the shelves, I had witnessed him attempt to lie to Urumi. There was no way he would live to see another round now, but I didn’t stick around to watch the outcome. I just grabbed a bottle and left, having chosen an energy drink to give me strength. This game couldn’t last forever, though I was waning quickly. I could feel it in my muscles. 

Enji and Banda re-entered the guardroom side by side. They probably crossed paths on their way back, but something about it seemed a little off. My eyes darted to the timer. 

10 minutes left of this round. 

It would be over soon. It had to be. Once the player count diminished on its own and nothing but strong partnerships remained, the Jack would have to make a move. 

As the two returned to our corner wall, Banda turned around, exposing his collar. Enji and I angled our heads to get a better view. 

‘Diamond,’ Enji said simply. 

‘ダイヤ,’ I added, nodding. 

Enji went next, turning around and parting his dark hair to reveal the club on the back of his collar. Banda and I confirmed his suit yet again. And now, it was my turn. Sweeping my hair out of the way, I revealed the back of my collar. There was a beat. A slight hesitation. 

‘Spade,’ Enji said. 

Banda hummed in agreement. ‘Spade.’ 

My breath hitched. A shiver ran down my spine.

I’m not a Spade. I’m definitely not a Spade. 

During that time after Enji and Banda had both disappeared, they must have come to some form of agreement. A plan. A story. A suit that they could tell me. Yet their faces gave nothing away. Banda was emotionless as always, idly watching the other players come and go, and Enji was looking at the timer, huffing with impatience. After telling such a lie, how could they appear so composed? I leaned against the wall once more, trying to act normal, or at least as normal as I knew how. But inside, I was shaking with the knowledge that after this round, once I emerged from my cell alive… 

I squeezed my eyes shut. I couldn’t bring myself to think about it. 

What will they do to me?

My fingernails dug into my palms, only the flash of pain offered nothing to distract me from what was to come. My mind raced in loops, desperate to think of a strategy - any way out of this. There wasn’t one. Why couldn’t I think of one?

My eyes lifted to Chishiya’s figure across the room, searching for any modicum of comfort or solace. There was nothing. He was playing his role too well, preoccupied with calming Ippei and not even sparing a glance in my direction. 

‘THE HOUR IS ALMOST OVER. PLEASE MAKE YOUR WAY TO THE CELLS.’

Adrenaline gushed through my chest. 

Oh god. 

As we trailed down to the rows of cells, I counted each breath, taking every inhale nice and slow just in case Banda was watching. I couldn’t have him witness my fear. He would enjoy it too much. 

‘IT IS TIME TO MAKE YOUR GUESS. EVERYONE, PLEASE ENTER A CELL. ONE PERSON PER CELL, PLEASE.’

I selected a cell, once again directly opposite Chishiya’s and stepped inside. The room was like a fridge. The nighttime chill had bled into the prison, leaving the concrete walls icy to the touch. The dim lightbulb above me flickered dangerously. 

‘PLEASE MAKE YOUR GUESS.’ 

With one word, I sealed my fate. ‘ハート.’ Heart.

A moment of silence passed as the timer ticked down. Then the familiar buzzer sounded and the metal lock clanged as it released. The round was over. I was alive, but at what cost?

Outside, I could hear the familiar creak of players exiting their cells. Pacing pack and forth across mine, I hesitated, unsure of what to do. Should I stay in here and pretend to be eliminated, risking being found out? Or should I go back out there, ready with an excuse? 

I can’t stay in here. 

It was tempting, but it just wouldn’t work. And so, taking a deep breath, I slowly opened the cell door. The creak was louder than I had expected, and as I walked out, my fate was already waiting for me. 

Enji and Banda were standing just a few metres away, paused mid-step as though they had been approaching my cell. Probably to check the state of the walls. 

Banda smirked, tilting his head, whereas Enji’s eyes widened. Nobody spoke. In the background, the other players briefly turned their heads, but continued walking. 

‘Surprise,’ I muttered. 

Enji shook his head wildly. ‘That’s impossible. You’re the Jack. You have to be!’ 

His words echoed down the hall, striking the other players with new fear as they stopped to look. Their faces emerged one by one, gathering around to witness this commotion. Headband, Glasses, even Yaba and Kotoko. Chishiya’s eyes were calmly trained on me. At his side, Ippei looked close to tears. 

‘How did you do it?’ Banda asked. ‘You should be dead.’ 

I couldn’t speak. I could’t even scramble together a sentence. It made no difference as I wasn’t even given a chance to explain. 

‘She’s the Jack!’ Headband pointed at me, stepping closer now, hysteria in her eyes. ‘You lied to her about her suit, right? If she’s alive it means she must be the Jack.’ 

‘違う,’ I whispered. You’re wrong. 

‘You spent the entire round with us,’ Banda said. ‘You didn’t speak to anyone else. Unless, after we left, perhaps…’ 

Glasses whimpered from across the hall. His nose was running as he shouted, ‘She didn’t speak to anyone! Even when you two left, she didn’t move. We were in the guardroom the whole time.’ 

‘みんなは違う!’ I called out. You’re all wrong! 

My eyes locked with Ippei and Chishiya, desperate for help. Anything to get me out of this mess. But Ippei was frozen, eyes shifting back and forth in blind panic. Chishiya looked perturbed, but he made no move to intervene. 

Please… please!

‘You did it the first round too,’ a new voice spoke. It was Yaba this time. He broke away from Kotoko and stepped towards us, hands in his suit pockets. ‘You didn’t speak to anyone during the first round, yet you survived.’ 

‘I guessed!’ I couldn’t even think of the Japanese word. ‘I guessed the suit!’ 

My cries fell on deaf ears. Enji gave me one cold look that made me want to shrivel away. His voice lowered to a whisper. ‘Let’s get her in the cell.’ 

Before I could even register what was happening, Yaba and Banda had grabbed me roughly under my arms, a dull pain flaring in my shoulder from my old bullet graze. A scream tore from my throat as I kicked and threw myself to the side, protesting as they dragged me back to the cold cell I had been just in moments ago. 

‘Stop!’ I shrieked, crying out as my body was flung onto the concrete floor. They immediately pulled the door shut, locking it from outside. I clambered to my feet and threw myself against the closed door, screaming through the mesh window.  ‘I’m not the Jack! I’m not!’

I pounded my fist on the door, fingers scrabbling to find an inside lock, some way of opening it. But it was no use. There was nothing. 

Back in the guardrom, the game continued without me. 

‘ROUND ELEVEN - START.’ 

My vision blurred, and tears dripped down my chin. ‘I’m not the Jack,’ I said weakly, watching through the mesh as the players walked off in the direction of the guardroom. The only ones who remained were Ippei and Chishiya. 

‘Ippei!’ I called out. ‘お願い… お願いします.’

Please help me… 

Shaking his head in disbelief, he left. Chishiya remained for a few heartbeats longer. His expression was guarded, and I could see him thinking carefully. Before I could beg him for help, he turned to follow Ippei. 

No no no no no.

Just like that, I was alone. I sank to the ground, but the cold soon bled into my clothes. Even leaning against a wall left me trembling. Again, the bulb above me flickered once... twice...  then blew. 

The cell was plunged into darkness.

[doppotranslations]

Butler Cafe Minuet ~Welcome home, young lady~

===============================

Hypmic ARB in-game event story (Jakurai, Doppo, Rei)

Recording Link: https://youtu.be/24ZRzYdjE94 (in case you wanna read along with the in-game voice lines and sound effects :D)

===============================

Chapter 1

Doppo: *talking on the phone* Yes… Yes… Then it’s settled, I will explain the proposal tomorrow morning at 11:00… Yes… Yes. Well then, I’ll get in touch tomorrow, thank you.

Ogura: Kannonzakaa~. Could you show me the delivery note you’re about to hand in to Toranomon Hospital Nr. 1?

Doppo: Yes. I’ll send it right away. Ogura: Thank you~ Doppo: Hmm… The invoice should be in this folder…

Boss: Kannonzaka-kun! Is Kannonzaka-kun here?

Doppo: (Ugh… that baldy came in… I can see his sweaty face coming over… what stupid thing does he want from me this time…) Boss: Kannonzaka-kun!

Doppo: Y-yes… Can I help you…?

Boss: You will be dispatched at the start of the next month!

Doppo: EH!? D-dispatched!? Where in the world would I…

Boss: To a concept cafe, or so they say! Doppo: C-concept cafe… Boss: The name is “Butler Café Minuet”!

Doppo: B-but, there is no food service experience on my resume, is there…?

Boss: That’s right.

Doppo: Then… Why do I have to go…?

Boss: Because one of our company’s shareholders opened that shop. That’s why I’d like all the members of Matenro to be the highlight of the cafe’s grand opening.

Doppo: Eh!? A-all three of us…?

Boss: The president agreed that two of you will do just fine.

Doppo: T-two… It’s fine if it’s just me, but I can't just make Sensei or Hifumi be part of this too!

Boss: Don’t say you can't do it when you haven’t even tried to do anything about it!! This major shareholder is kind enough to only want one other member to participate! I don’t care which one of them it is, make sure to bring him with you!

Doppo: B-but…

Boss: If you don’t bring either one of them your salary will be cut so you’d better do your best! Now then, get to it!

Doppo: W-what the…

[At Doppo and Hifumi’s apartment]Doppo: *sigh* I’m home… Hifumi: Welcome home, Doppo-kun!

Doppo: Heading to work?

Hifumi: Yeah, I was just about to leave.

Doppo: …Hey, hey, are you free the first weekend of next month?

Hifumi: Around that time I’m going to the club in Osaka for two weeks to help out.

Doppo: *sighs* I s-see…

Hifumi: …what is it? Doppo: N-no! It’s nothing! I was just thinking we could go out together if you were free.

Hifumi: That’s too bad. We’ll have to hang out when I get back.

Doppo: Y-yeah… let’s…

Hifumi: Uh-oh… it’s about time I have to go. See ya!

Doppo: L-looks like I have no choice but to beg for Sensei to help me out…

[At Jakurai’s house]

Doppo: S-sorry for coming so late at night…

Jakurai: I don’t mind it at all. Well then, you said on the phone you had a request that had to be discussed in person?

Doppo: Y-yeah, actually…

[Skip to after Doppo explains it]

Jakurai: A butler cafe… hm?

Doppo: Y-yes… it’s a no, as I was expecting, right…?

Jakurai: Not at all, let’s do it!

Doppo: Eh!?

Jakurai: I wouldn’t want you to have to handle this all alone.

Doppo: S-sensei… Thank you so much…!

Jakurai: I’ll do my very best on that day!

Chapter 2

Rei: …

Con Man A: Amayado-san!

Con Man B: Greetings!

Rei: …so, how did it go?

Con Man A: Well… we couldn’t exactly approach the target.

Con Man B: The security the head conglomerate has there was way too tight…

Rei: What the hell~. You said I could trust you to quietly approach and observe-

Con Man A: Please forgive us…

Rei: *lights a cigarette* …whatever, looks like little old me has got no choice but to go on a business trip.

Con Man B: …All of us entered the building from different angles yet it still ended in failure… I’m afraid it will go the same whether or not you join in or not…

Rei: You two keep saying that but fail to realize your plan was mediocre in the first place.

Con Man A: But, tricking him isn’t so easy…

Rei: You two are too naive Could someone really call themselves a con man if they weren’t able to deceive anyone in this world?

Con Man B: For future reference, could you tell us what your plan to enter that building is?

Rei: If you really want to become first class professionals you should be able to think of it yourselves.

Con Man A: I get what you’re saying but could you at least give us a hint…

Rei: When it comes to this job, what’s of the utmost importance is entering the residence. That’s why the best way to go about it is to become live-in servants.

Con Man B: That is something we thought of too, but the employment process proved to be a real obstacle…

Rei: Hehe. Saying that just proves to me you’re still a second rate con man.

[In the mansion]

Doppo: Sensei… Thank you very much, I really mean it, I am so grateful… thank you so so much!

Jakurai: If you say so… I’m very glad to help out with this favor, but you don’t need to thank me so much.

Doppo: AAH!! I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I’m sorry!!!

Jakurai: Don’t worry about it… The inside of this store looks exactly like a Western mansion, doesn’t it? The accuracy of the architecture is truly astounding.

Owner: Greetings! First and foremost I would like to express my gratitude to the two of you for cooperating with us. I am the owner of this store.

Doppo: Oh, it’s a pleasure meeting you… I am Kannonzaka Doppo from the sales department of E.L. Medical Ltd.

Jakurai: My name is Jinguuji Jakurai. I’m delighted to make your acquaintance.

Owner: Thank you for your politeness! The rest of the staff will also introduce themselves at once. Everyone, this way!

Doppo: Eh!?

Jakurai: You are…

Rei: Oh, it’s a small world, isn’t it~

Owner: Now then, everybody, please get changed into your uniforms at once.

[Skip to after they get changed]

Doppo: T-this outfit… it’s so embarrassing…

Jakurai: You look great in it, Doppo-kun.

Doppo: Eh, ha, ha, thank you… but it suits you a lot better, Sensei.

Rei: Hey now, it’s pretty clear that the one best suited for this attire is little old me~ *wink*

Doppo: Hey… Amayado-san… What are you doing here?

Rei: Hehe. I’m here to rehearse my butler skills. Isn’t that obvious?

Doppo: I-is that so… I don’t get what you are saying at all…

Owner: Now then, everybody, starting tomorrow we’ll be open. Today you may all receive a short course on customer service.

Doppo: Please…

Jakurai: That would be great, thanks.

Rei: Sure thing.

Chapter 3

Doppo: W-welcome… h-home… m-mish…

Jakurai: Doppo-kun, you shouldn’t be this stiff when saying that…

Doppo: U-uhh… This is way too hard…

Rei: Today’s black tea is Dimbula blend. With its great balance of taste and fragrance, it is certainly something that I recommend.

Jakurai: Amayado-san, you've surely gotten used to being a butler, haven't you?

Doppo: Hey, Amayado-san…

Rei: Yeah, what is iiit?

Doppo: How are you so good at this?

Rei: Whaaa? Being a gentleman is just something I am passionate about.

Doppo: T-that’s right... I am no gentleman…

Owner: Greetings, ladies and gentlemen! You may have a taste of our store’s food if you wish.

Doppo: Woah~. It sure looks tasty.

Jakurai: Hmm… Hachis Parmentier, Légumes à la Grecque, Coq au Vin. Looks like they are serving French food.

Rei: Let’s have some right away then!

[Skip to after they taste the food]

Owner: Was the food to your liking?

Doppo: It was all so delicious!

Owner: That’s great-

Rei: Not really, the quality of the food doesn’t justify the price at all.

Doppo: Eh….?

Jakurai: The arrangement of the food is beautiful. The taste is not bad either. However, as Amayado-san mentioned, it just does not live up to the price.

Rei: *sighs* This would only satisfy fools with bad taste.

Doppo: F-fools with bad taste…?

Jakurai: Yes. Doppo-kun, if you don’t know the genuine flavor of these dishes you can’t really help it.

Doppo: Sensei…

Owner: W-well… What exactly was bad about it…?

Rei: Rather than wasting time explaining it, how about I show you how it’s supposed to be made? Jinguji, lend me a hand.

Jakurai: Yes, let’s get to it.

Doppo: Haha… Looks like I’m just a fool with bad taste who doesn’t know the genuine flavor of these dishes…

[Skip to after they cook]

Rei: Pardon the wait! Here’s the genuine Coq au Vin.

Jakurai: Excuse us for making you wait! Here’s what I know Hachis Parmentier is supposed to be like.

Owner: E-even the scent is different…

Rei: Hehe. Make sure not to let it get cold.

Owner: T-then… *tastes the food* A-amazing! The chicken is so wonderfully tender and it perfectly intertwines with the richness of the red wine sauce…

Doppo: Excuse me… *tastes the food* Sensei’s Hachis Parmentier… It’s so good that I can’t even begin to compare it with the dish from before.

Owner: How is it so different when the same ingredients were used…

Rei: Well, what made the difference was the skill of the people who made it.

Owner: If it’s not a problem, I would like you two to help out in the kitchen…

Rei: That’s great and all but how about we also change this dull menu while we’re at it?

Jakurai: If my skills will suffice, I’ll gladly lend you a hand.

Owner: That’s a great help!

Rei: Well then, Jinguji, let’s go to the kitchen right away.

Jakurai: Yes. Doppo-kun, please help us out by tasting the food.

Doppo: Would someone who’s a fool with bad taste who doesn’t know the genuine flavor of these dishes really be the right person here…

[Skip to after they help in the kitchen]

Doppo: I can’t eat anymore… Everything is tasty...

Rei: Well, looks like we did it. We taught them how to perfectly follow the process.

Jakurai: Doppo-kun, here’s some stomach medicine.

Doppo: S-sorry for this… Thank you so much…

Owner: I’m very grateful for your help, everyone. We shall meet again tomorrow for the grand opening.

Rei: Yep! I surely want to keep riding this ship. Jakurai: I’ll do my very best. See you tomorrow.

Doppo: E-excuse me for being a bother, I’ll d-do my best…

Chapter 4

[The Day of the Grand Opening]

Doppo: Welcome home, miss. I shall prepare the tea at once. Your table is over this way.

Jakurai: Here we use only the highest grade tea leaves. The light elegant aroma together with its refined taste make this black tea truly a pleasure to drink.

Rei: Miss, it appears it is time to depart. Please follow me.

[Later, in the kitchen]

Doppo: *sighs* …even though it’s only the first day there are so many customers…

Rei: Hey, Kannonzaka. Give me some water too.

Doppo: Yes, of course. *pours him a glass and hands it to him*

Rei: Thank you. *drinks water* Phew~ looks like lil old me got tired too, as expected.

Doppo: It’s because we’ve been moving around constantly since noon…

Jakurai: Hey, Doppo-kun.

Doppo: Yes. What’s the matter?

Jakurai: It seems like someone has called you over. Please head over to the hall.

Doppo: Called me over…? Alright, got it… Hmm… I wonder who it is. *goes back*

Ogura: Yo~! I came to poke fun at you~

Mitsuya: Tailcoat, huh? (lmao)

Doppo: Get the hell out of here…

Ogura: Oi oi oi~ Are you ok-?? What’s with that attitude, dude??

Doppo: Such a bother… Come on, hurry up and turn right…

Mitsuya: Excuse mee~. That butler is being awfully rude to us.

Jakurai: Please excuse us. …Doppo-kun.

Doppo: E-excuse me…

Doppo: W-welcome home, young master… Please hand me your luggage so I can carry it.

Ogura: Right on!

Mitsuya: Don't mind if I do.

Doppo: Damnit, I should stuff the insides of their bags in the fucking garbage..

[Time skip]

Owner: Jinguji-san, Amayado-san!

Jakurai: Yes. What appears to be the matter?

Rei: Yeah, what is it?

Owner: Both of our chefs seem to have injured themselves with kitchen knives… I hope it is not too much trouble, but could the two of you help out in the kitchen?

Rei: Well now, that’s fine and all, but…

Jakurai: Our absence would surely turn out to be a burden for Doppo-kun…

Doppo: A-ahaha… I’ll try my best to manage somehow…

Owner: I deeply apologize…

Doppo: The inside of the cafe is completely packed… Those two are absent so I have to cover for them… Yup, I’m dead… (Huh!? Wait a second… It doesn’t have to be like that. There are two idiots here who aren’t customers!) *runs to their table* Oi, you two!

Ogura: Oi oi oi! What do you mean by “you two”? What happened to “young masters”?

Mitsuya: Hey, watch your tongue!

Doppo: *chuckles* The owner is in trouble…

Ogura and Mitsuya: Huh?

Doppo: It’s time for work, you assholes!! Go change into these tailcoats at once!

Ogura and Mitsuya: WHAAAAAAAAAAAT!!!!!????

Owner: Everyone, thanks to you we brought our opening day to a good end. Thank you very much. As an apology for not being prepared enough for this, please have something to eat if you’d like.

Jakurai: Thank you very much!

Ogura and Mitsuya: S-sshoo tired…

Ogura: We didn’t even get any training in working as butlers or anything… that was horrible…

Owner: Oh? Where are Kannonzaka-san and Amayado-san?

Jakurai: Doppo-kun is taking out the trash and Amayado-san went to get changed.

Owner: Is that so?

Ogura: Oh, there’s beer!

Mitsuya: Oh~! I definitely need it after all that hard work.

Ogura: Hey, Jinguji-sensei, here, have some!

Jakurai: N-no… I shouldn’t… Mitsuya: C’mon, no need to hold back!

[Outside]

Rei: *lights a cigarette and sighs*

Doppo: *throws the trash* Amayado-san, thank you so much for helping out. Thanks to you it looks like I won’t be getting a pay cut…

Rei: Ahaha! You seem to be working for a really shady company! If it’s all fine and dandy, lil’ old me would love making some sweet moolah off of scamming these chumps~

Doppo: Ahaha… if you do that I’d be getting that pay cut after all, since they won't be able to pay my salary.

Rei: Anyways, it’s been forever since these old bones have moved this much, so my joints are creaking~

Doppo: Ahaha… mine too… *sighs* I want a massage…

Rei: Massage you say? I could make some arrangements for that.

Doppo: I’d love to go, but I have work tomorrow…

[Glass Breaking Noise]

Doppo and Rei: !?

Jakurai: There isn’t enough fuckin’ booze! Hurry up‘n bring me more already!

Ogura and Mitsuya: *gasp* HELP!!!

Doppo: Amayado-san. On second thought, I’ll be taking you up on that offer for getting a massage.

Rei: Yeah, sure, but first let's slip into something comfier…

Doppo: If you go inside you’ll be finished for sure! So, let’s get the hell out of here!

Rei: Oi oi! What the hell are you talking about…

Doppo:  (Ogura… Mitsuya… turns out I’m counting on you…)

[whysamwhy123]

So, I started writing a dumb crackfic about a bunch of my blorbos attempting to hit on my newest blorbo because it was funny in my head buuuuut turns out I'm not funny enough to bring it to life so I probably ain't gonna finish it. But I don't wanna feel like I completely wasted my time, so I'm just gonna drop the unfinished thing here because I can't seem to make myself continue it. It's a shame because I feel like it would have gotten a little better/funnier after I got the set-up out of the way, I had plans for where this would go, but alas, my brain has failed me yet again. And whatever, this most likely appeals to absolutely no one anyway, so here it is, read at your own risk because it sucks!

Jack was minding his own business before the show, wandering the halls while dicking around his phone, when he spotted Hook, just standing there.

‘’Hey man, what’s up?’’ he said, leaning against the nearest wall, still looking at his phone.

When no response came, Jack looked up. Hook was still as a statue, his eyes focused forward. Did he not hear him?

‘’Hello? Hook?’’

Jack got closer and slowly turned his head in the direction Hook was staring. ‘’What are you looki - whoa!’’

Jack almost dropped his phone when he first caught a glimpse of her. No wonder Hook was staring - she had to be the most beautiful woman he’d ever soon. She was fucking gorgeous. The kind of woman that’s so beautiful it feels like she shouldn’t be allowed to exist. Or that you shouldn’t be allowed to look at her, how dare you think yourself worthy! But she was real and she was right there all the way over on the other side of the hallway. She seemed to be checking how she looked in her phone’s camera, adjusting her long blonde hair and examining her makeup as though it wasn’t already perfect. She was perfect. She was wearing this all red ensemble that showed off just how killer her body was. And she was tall too. Long legs.

Jack’s mouth was agape. He knew it wasn’t polite to stare but how could he not?

‘’Jack, buddy,’’ Hook said, not taking his eyes off the beauty across the hall. ‘’I’ve found my next conquest.’’

Jack couldn’t take his eyes off her either. Who could blame them? ‘’Who is that?’’

Hook somehow managed to tear his eyes away from the vision they’ve been blessed to look upon and turned his head to Jack instead. ‘’My next conquest. Weren’t you listening?’’

Jack forced himself to look away - any longer and he was about to start drooling. ‘’No, who is she? What’s her name? I’ve gotta know.’’

‘’You seriously don’t know who she is?’’

The two men whirled around to find Daniel Garcia right next to them.

‘’How long have you been there?’’ Hook asked.

Daniel waved him off, a whatever gesture and then nodded his head in the direction of the unbelievably gorgeous woman. ‘’That’s Mariah May!’’

Hook and Jack blinked at him.

‘’From Stardom?’’

More blinking.

‘’Club Venus? Rose Gold?’’

‘’You’re just saying words at us, man,’’ Hook said.

Daniel gave them a judgemental look. ‘’You guys don’t watch Stardom? For real? Do you not watch any joshi wrestling at all?’’

Jack scratched the back of his neck. Hook gave a half-hearted shrug.

Daniel shook his head. ‘’What’s wrong with you guys? Y’all got no taste. Where else do you find spots to steal?’’

‘’My dad,’’ Hook said.

At the same time, Jack said, ‘’Shawn Michaels, I guess?’’

Daniel sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. ‘’I’m surrounded by uncultured swines. Look, she was one of the hottest - literally - free agents in the business. She just signed here, she’s debuting tonight.’’

‘’She’s a wrestler?’’ Hook said. ‘’Damn. Would have been easier if she was a rat.’’

‘’She could be,’’ Daniel said. ‘’You can be a wrestler and a rat at the same time.’’

Hook narrowed his eyes at Daniel. ‘’You would know.’’

Daniel smiled back, completely oblivious. ‘’Yeah, I mean, look at Adam Cole. Or Edge. Or CM Pu -’’ He stopped himself and his eyes went wide in Jack’s direction. A very uncomfortable silence fell over the three of them, one that seemed to last precisely one million years. ‘’...other examples…’’

‘’Alright, enough standing around,’’ Hook said finally. He took his hands out of his hoodie pocket and cracked his knuckles. ‘’I’m going in.’’

Two hands, one from Daniel and one from Jack, shot out and grabbed his hoodie, preventing him from taking a step.

‘’No way,’’ Daniel said.

‘’Nuh uh,’’ Jack added.

Hook glared at the two. ‘’I saw her first.’’

Daniel was aghast. ‘’No, I saw her first! You didn’t know who she was until fifteen seconds ago!’’

‘’That doesn’t count,’’ Hook argued. ‘’I saw her first in the building, so I get first dibs.’’

‘’That’s not fair!’’ Jack whined.

Daniel said, ‘’You don’t understand, man - I’ve been crazy about this girl ever since I first saw her on Stardom World. I’ve been waiting for this moment for months - that could be the love of my life right there!’’

‘’Yeah, well, I wanna fuck her,’’ Hook said, as though that was the most airtight, well-reasoned counterpoint imaginable. ‘’You can fanboy over her all you want after I’m done with her.’’

‘’Hell no! I don’t want your sloppy seconds!’’

‘’If ‘the love of your life’ is sloppy seconds, what does that say about you, huh?’’

Hook and Daniel had been gradually inching closer to each other with each response. They both looked mad, like they were one second away from throwing punches. Jack couldn’t let that happen. Not after last time…

He put a hand on each man’s shoulder and created some distance between them. ‘’Guys, guys, calm down! We don’t need to fight.’’

Clearer heads seemed to prevail, Hook and Daniel shared a nod and then their body language changed, less guarded.

‘’Besides, you’re both wrong,’’ Jack continued. ‘’I should get to approach her first.’’

Hook and Daniel, now suddenly allies, raised an eyebrow each at Jack. ‘’Why?’’ they both asked at the same time.

‘’Because…’’ Jack started. His mind drew a blank. ‘’...I…want to…’’

Now it was Jack’s turn to be blinked at. He wracked his brain - he couldn’t let this opportunity slip away, not when the girl in question was that hot.

‘’Okay, here’s why it should be me! Or, I guess, here’s why it shouldn’t be either of you!’’ He pointed at Daniel. ‘’You hit on girls all the time, while I don’t. So much. So it’s only fair that I got a shot first because, you know, it’s a special occasion.’’ Daniel looked incredulous and opened his mouth to respond but Jack cut him off by pointing at Hook and continuing. ‘’And you! Aren’t you already seeing someone?’’

‘’Uh, no? The fuck you talking about?’’ Hook asked, looking very annoyed at the mere suggestion.

‘’What about that girl you hook up with all the time? The one who’s always texting you? Carly something?’’

Hook rolled his eyes. ‘’Alright, look - technically, I never told Carly we were exclusive. I just…told her a bunch of other stuff and she kinda assumed and I didn’t correct her because I didn’t wanna seem like an asshole. But just because she lets me hit on the regular doesn’t mean I owe her anything - she should understand that. So how is it my fault if she gets mad about something like this?’’

Jack furrowed his brow at his best friend. ‘’You…you don’t seriously think that, right? That’s gross!’’

‘’Nah, that makes perfect sense,’’ Daniel said. ‘’Flawless logic. She’s the one in the wrong, not you.’’

He and Hook shared a quick fistbump. Fuckboy solidarity.

Jack sighed deeply. ‘’See? This is why I should get to shoot my shot first - I won’t treat like her dirt like you two assholes!’’

Daniel looked offended. ‘’I’ll have you know, I’ll treat her like a queen!’’

Hook nodded. ‘’Yeah, same. Unless she doesn’t want me to, you know?’’

Fistbumps all around.

‘’There’s gotta be a way we can decide, fairly, who gets to go first,’’ Jack said. ‘’Some way we can settle this like mature adults. Like men.’’

The three men took a long moment to ponder their predicament and search for an appropriate solution.

Hook glanced down at his fist. ‘’Rock, paper, scissors?’’

‘’Yes,’’ Jack said, emphatically.

Daniel rubbed his hands together. ‘’Alright, how we doing this? Elimination style or triple threat rules?’’

Jack decided to defer to Hook; it was his idea after all.

Hook considered it for a moment. ‘’The usual 3-way match rules. First to score a fall wins.’’

The three of them formed a triangle and each of them placed a fist onto their other palm, ready and waiting. After silently confirming they were all ready through a series of shared nods, Jack took it upon himself to count them down.

‘’Okay, here we go! Rock, paper, scissors, sh -’’

Before he could finish, Jack was shoved back by Daniel, his back colliding with the wall. Daniel then grabbed Hook’s hand, still balled into a fist, and promptly covered it with his own palm, preventing Hook from changing his option and signalling paper-beats-rock.

‘’I win!’’ he announced proudly.

Hook ripped his hand away. ‘’Like hell you do!’’

‘’The fuck was that?!’’ Jack demanded, rubbing his back where it was now sore. ‘’That wasn’t a win, you cheated!’’

Daniel smiled smugly. ‘’No, I didn’t. We said triple threat rules - that means it’s No DQ.’’

A lengthy discussion ensued about what exactly constitutes a disqualification in a game of Rock, Paper, Scissors, hollowed by a side tangent about why there aren't disqualifications in a triple threat match. Upon realising that they weren’t going anywhere and were just wasting time, they all agreed to play by elimination rules. Hook was the first fall, picking paper while Jack and Daniel went with scissors. And in the finals, Jack’s paper bested Daniel’s rock. How poetic.

‘’Yes!’’ Jack exclaimed triumphantly. He took a great deal of satisfaction in Hook and Daniel’s sour, dejected expressions.

Jack glanced back over to confirm that Mariah was a) still there and b) hadn’t overheard any of that, which turned out to be true on both counts. She was in the exact same spot as before, still admiring herself in her phone’s camera. Jack could relate.

Jack took a few deep breaths to psyche himself up. ‘’Okay, Jack, you got this. You got this! I know exactly what’ll work here!’’

Hook groaned. ‘’You’re not seriously gonna try that again, are you?’’

‘’I told you, it totally works!’’ Jack said, defiant. ‘’Sometimes.’’

‘’What’s he talking about?’’ Daniel asked.

Hook sighed. ‘’He has this thing he does to try and pick up girls. It’s stupid - he just stands around looking sad and supposedly, a girl will eventually come up to him and ask him what’s wrong.’’

‘’It. Works. Sometimes,’’ Jack insisted.

Daniel considered that. ‘’Huh. Yeah, I can see it. One time, there was this girl who told me I had ‘sad eyes’ and it was half the reason she fucked me. So you might be onto something.’’

With his confidence boosted, Jack took another breath to calm his nerves and headed down the hallway to his target. He willed himself to stay calm, but he grew more nervous with each footstep. The closer he got, the better he could see her. She was even more stunning up close.

When he was near enough, he put on his game face. Which was to say, he put on his best sad puppy dog eyes and leaned against the wall, dejected.

His head was bowed, but he could see Mariah out of the corner of his eye. Unfortunately, she was still distracted by her own reflection. Jack didn’t blame her, but he really needed her to look his way. 

He let out a loud sigh. Nothing. So he sighed louder. Still nothing. The third sigh was so loud and exaggerated, it was almost comical. But it was the one that got the job done. Mariah finally looked up from her phone and found him there. There was a flash of concern on her face and Jack knew his diabolical plan was working.

‘’Excuse me, are you alright? You look really sad!’’

Whoa, she has an English accent? Jack wasn’t expecting that. It took him a couple of seconds to process and actually respond.

‘’Oh, it’s nothing, really. Just one thing after another today, you know?’’

Jack knows this is the part where she asks more questions about why he’s so sad and tries to cheer him up.

Mariah just hummed. ‘’Okay,’’ she said, and then turned her attention back to her phone.

Uh oh. It’s not going according to plan! Jack’s brain scrambled for what to do next. He pushed himself away from the wall and closer to her.

‘’Uh, hey, wait! Uh, I’m Jack!’’ he said, offering his hand out.

She eyed his hand curiously and then reluctantly shook it. Goddammit, why did he try to shake her hand? That’s not romantic, that’s…business-y?

‘’Nice to meet you, I guess,’’ she said. ‘’I’m Mariah May.’’

‘’Yeah, I know who you are,’’ Jack said. He wracked his brain for what it was Daniel said about her back there. ‘’I saw you wrestle in, uh…Venus World?’’

[the-sidekick-club]

Kim… We Have a Problem 🍫

Written by:

@heroes-villains-side-blog★​​@tratieisdabest★@just-a-space-rabbit​​  

TW: Breaking and Entering, Attempted thievery, Destruction of property, Food (comfort eating implied), Fighting ❘〣❘〣❘ ✿ ❘〣❘〣❘

Hirra kicked open the front door of Kim’s apartment building. She seemed to be in a grumpy mood after failing to rob a jewelry store earlier that day, but was still looking forward to today's meeting.

While the "Sidekick Club" (the name stuck after Vulcan used it) didn't have much information to share on Shadow's and Alexandria's relationship, they had still chosen to meet.

Each member had their own reasons, but Hirra had told herself the free snacks and the look on Mender’s face when she lost at a board game was too good to give up. It would hopefully make her day a bit better… 

But as the echo of the door finally subsided, she stopped as the open hallway was filled with strange clicking noises followed by annoyed grunts. They seemed to be coming from the floor above, which was concerning ‘what if someone was trying to steal something from Kim?’ and annoying ‘and why are they so loud about it?’. 

Sneaking up the stairs to Kim’s floor, she looked around for the source of the sound. It was only then she got to Kim’s front door, she saw what it was.

“OI! MENDER!” she yelled, making Mender jump up in fear and drop the lock picking kit.

“Hirra! Why did you scare me like that?!” she yelled back. But Hirra was too busy going for the kit to reply, “Hey, that’s my lock picking kit!” Mender yelled as Hirra grabbed it before her.

“Why are you trying to break into Kim's place?”

“Well…” Mender looked at Hirra as her cheeks reddened. “I couldn't get through the window and I have already knocked, but Kim was not home, so I…”

“Tried to steal my thing?” Hirra sounded offended, “I’m the one that picks locks here and you- eh, wait… what did you mean you knocked?!” 

“I knocked on the door and Kim isn't home, and I'm good at lock picking. But I think Kim replaced the lock with a better one, because it's really complex!” Mender refused to look Hirra in the eye when she said all this. 

“Well, then,” Hirra's demeanor changed completely, “guess it’s time for you to learn from a lock picking master!” She said proudly and shoved Mender to the side. “Now look closely! This is how it is done, just take it like that, and there we go!” she said as the door clicked open.

“Wait now, hang on! You didn't tell me how to do it!” Even with her mask covering parts of her face, you could still see how the hero's… everything scrunched up in annoyance. 

“Tough luck” Hirra smirked and walked into the small apartment, Mender quickly followed, but with a frown. It still felt strange being here when Kim was not home, but that never stopped the two from entering anyway. 

After the ‘pockets incident’ as they called it, Kim had to move out of the other apartment (as the location was compromised now that Lady Alexandria knew where it was), and into somewhere new.

Earthly and natural, would be the words Mender thought of to describe it with its old and mismatched furniture. On the surface, nothing in the room matched anything else, and yet it still somehow worked together.

It wasn't a bad place per se, though it was a bit cramped.

There was a sudden thump, as Hirra lay down flat on the sofa, typing away on her phone. 

“What are you doing?” Mender asked, looking down at her. 

Hirra looked up at her for a moment before turning back to the phone, and kept typing. “I’m trying to find out why Kim's late, but they won't answer me.” 

“Can you at least move, so I can have a seat? I’m tired from work,” Mender said. “Also, I want my lock picking kit back.” Hirra shoved the kit at Mender without looking up from her phone.

Mender just sighed and went to the kitchen in search of the hidden club snack storage. ‘Might as well prepare for the meeting’ she thought as her stomach made a loud growl. 

“What was that?” Hirra snickered from the sofa. 

“Not my fault. We had four villains all of who committed crimes during my lunch break today, so I haven't eaten since breakfast!” but Hirra only laughed at her, until her stomach made an equal sound, making Mender snicker.

After some looking she finally found it, the metal box labeled "candy"... she could feel Hirra’s eyes looking at it. 

“Any word from Kim yet?” Mender asked as she grabbed the box and brought it to the table. 

“Not yet,” Hirra sat up as she answered.

“Well, at least we can have some snacks!” Mender was trying to cheer up the mood a bit, so she placed the box on the table, plopped down on the couch, and opened it to find... 

“WHY IS THERE ONLY ONE LEFT!!!!” They yelled, looking down at the sad lonely chocolate, surrounded by the red licorice Kim had mistaken for raspberry toffee some weeks earlier. 

But before they let the thoughts of who had done this, and why, there was a more urgent matter to attend to

‘Who is going to eat it?’

They both stood up and looked at each other, clearly thinking the same thing. 

“This chocolate bar ain't big enough for the two of us, pardner.” Hirra said as she moved to the side for a better fighting angle.

Mender confusedly moved in the opposite direction, though she made sure not to move too far away from the little candy box. “Why are you talking like that? Never mind, I’m starving and Kim’s out of snacks and food!” 

“If you want food, best you mozy on down to the grocery store and get s'more then. Git.” Hirra snickered back at her. 

“I won't be mozying anywhere! If anyone will be mozying, it's you! Pardner.” Mender said in a stereotypical "cowboy" accent matching Hirra back; clearly neither were backing down, which meant only one thing.

There was a loud crash, followed by an even more concerning bang! As red starts to spread everywhere from all the scattered licorice, Hirra and Mender lay bound together on top of the now broken coffee table. It seemed like they fired their weapons at the same time, and Hirra's net guns and Mender’s grappling glove clearly don't mix well in a tight space.

They were both stuck in a tangled mess of rope and… more rope, both from the net and grappling hook. 

As they both twisted trying to get loose there was a snarky “Well… that was clever of you!” from Hirra. 

Only for Mender who was currently on top of Hirra to yell back “Yes, REALLY clever of you to use a NET GUN INSIDE! Where did you even hide that thing?”

“Like I would tell you!” Hirra used her power to create a knife. “Now, please move! I need to cut the grappling rope.”

“What?! No, you can’t do that! Cut the net instead, that’s what's really trapping us.”

“No way I’m cutting my precious net!” Hirra yelled.

“Well, there is no way I’ll let you cut my rope!” Mender replied, laying down so that Hirra could not cut anything. 

What followed was an “Ugh… FINE!” as Hirra relaxed as well. 

The room almost fell into silence before Mender chimed in, “… so, will you cut the net then?”

“No.” Hirra answered with a straight face. “I’ll wait for Kim to come home, so that they can do it.”

“Fine! But don’t complain when Kim has to cut the net open!” Mender said. 

They lay in silence for a while, before there was suddenly someone calling Hirra’s phone. Hirra tried to get up but was unable to, swinging the net uncomfortably for the two.

“Hirra! STOP! We can't reach it!” Mender yelled. The call stopped and a message began to play. 

“Hey, sorry, Hirra, I’m going to be late!” said Kim’s voice from the phone. “You guys just go ahead and enjoy some snacks in the meantime, see ya when I get home in an hour!” 

And then silence… 

“A whole hour…” the two breathed out defeatedly.

It took one hour and thirty minutes before the sidekick duo heard the door open, and Kim finally rounded the corner of the small hallway.

"Sorry, I'm late,” they said, not fully looking at the duo, as they brought in several grocery bags. “Vulcan held me up in some dumb meeting, and then I also had to get groceries after... What are you two doing…?" Kim said as they finally looked at the two of them. 

“IT WAS ALL MENDER!” the villain yelled. 

“NO, IT WAS ALL HIRRA!” the hero yelled.

“I can’t believe you two!” Kim says in a defeated voice as they rub their forehead in annoyance.

There was a cheeky “Can you get us out?” From Hirra, but Kim just looked back at her before answering. “Nope.”

“WHAT?” they both yelled.

“I need to get this food in the fridge. In the meantime, you two can explain why you are bound together like this and apologize for breaking my coffee table.”

As Kim got to setting the food in place, the two begin talking. 

And they began recapping their day, and everything that happened before the fight started.

“And I've been having a hard day since I haven't eaten anything since breakfast!” Mender piped up trying to support her argument “Just been one villain after another!”

“Like my day was any better!” Hirra interrupted. “I spent weeks planning that robbery of that jewelry store, but then after everything went PERFECTLY, guess what?” 

“What?” Kim said, having left the remaining food to sit down on the sofa and listen to the two.

“IT WAS ALL FAKE! And because of me, they got arrested! And I was left with a bag of worthless junk!” Hirra yelled. 

“Yikes…” Kim said, shocked. 

“Yikes, indeed.” Hirra huffed. “And then I come here, and I can’t even successfully steal a single small piece of candy.” 

“What do you mean by that?” Kim said, finally noticing all the red licorice, spread all over the floor.

“Hirra refused to share!” Mender grunted. “And I was so hungry!” she pouted while giving Kim her best puppy dog eyes.

While the hero didn't have any siblings, she did have older cousins, and most teachers liked her; she'd had many years to perfect the sad sad eyes. But before she could get Kim to feel bad for her, Hirra interrupted!

“WELL, SO WAS I!” Hirra yelled back. “But when we opened the box—”

“The Box!” Kim yelled and jumped up from the sofa. “I forgot about that!”

The two looked up at them in confusion, before Mender began to ask, “What do you mean 'you forgot'…? Kim…? Why was it filled with only licorice???”

But Kim was no longer keeping eye contact with the two. When they sat back down on the sofa did the duo notice Kim’s cheeks had reddened. “I… I ate it all…” they said in a defeated tone.

“YOU!!!” Hirra yelled.

“I mean it does make sense,” Mender said. “Who else would have? But what I want to know is WHY?”

Kim was not looking at the other two as they began talking sheepishly. “Well, the thing about adult life and living alone is that you have to remember things like how much there is left of stuff and all that, and then yesterday I had forgotten to buy more food, but I did not feel like going out so… I ate it. I had planned to refill it before the meeting! But I got caught up with work…''

“What happened yesterday?” Hirra asked sounding almost worried.

Kim looked like they would rather not answer. “I got stood up... on a date…”

“You went on a date?!” Mender suddenly asked. “With who? Do we know them? Are they a villain!? I can get them arrested if they are! Who are they!?”

But Mender’s questions were quickly downed out by Hirra yelling her own questions. 

“WHO DID IT?! TELL ME KIM! AND I'LL BEAT THEIR SORRY ASS!!!”

“Who it was is for neither of you to know.” Kim finally answered once the two quieted down. “And, yes, I was supposed to go on a date yesterday. Would have been nice to know that they changed their mind, before paying TOO MUCH for a new dress and dinner reservation, and then letting me sit there for over an hour waiting, but hey, that's just how dating a villain is sometimes.”

“So it was a VILLAIN!” Hirra yelled, making Mender and Kim jump. “Mender, I think we got our next case! We need to find out who the villain is and beat them up!”

But before Mender could answer with her already forming plan, Kim had gotten up and brought out an old hidden knife that Hirra had made for them years ago.

This immediately took the duo’s focus.

Kim began to move and test the different parts of the bindings. “Looks like I need to cut both the net and grappling rope to get you loose. So let's make a deal.”

“A deal?”

“Since we're all a bit to blame and all of us seem to have had a bad day.” Kim began. “I’ll cut you loose and then fix your weapons after. In return, you two need to make dinner and help me either fix or get a new coffee table. Does that sound good?”

“Yes! Deal!” Mender and Hirra nodded in agreement, seeming very ready to get separated from each other. 

Then, as Kim was about to begin cutting they stopped. “Oh, and one more thing… There will be no looking to find the person that stood me up, okay?” 

The duo was silent for a moment, before Mender answered, “Yes, we won't do that!”. She didn't like it, but anything to be free of Hirra. After more silence, Kim then made full eye contact with Hirra who after some time gave a half enthusiastic “Fine…” 

Turns out they were a bit more tangled together than any of them originally thought, but after fifteen minutes both Hirra and Mender were out of the mess.

"Soooo, what's for dinner, Kimball?" Hirra asked, looking curiously towards the kitchen and the half empty bags of groceries.

“Kimball?” Mender whispered in confusion. 

“I bought food for some Nortusen isle's style Tacos, though with some authentic spiciness.'' Kim said as they got up to look for a toolkit to fix the broken weapons.

Meanwhile, Hirra was walking over to the open kitchen throwing several fist bumps into the air in joy, clearly approving the choice. 

Mender, on the other hand, looked down at the broken coffee table. “Sorry, for breaking it, it was stupid of us to fight like that.”

“Hey, don’t worry about it!” Kim said as they dropped all the needed stuff on the small dinner table. “I got it for free from some guy online, the only annoying part was carrying it here. But I think I can fix it. If not, then at least I got two people to carry the new one for me. And hey, got to say I’m impressed! With the weapons used, it is quite unbelievable that you two only manage to break the table and nothing else!” They laughed at the end of the sentence, making Mender smile. 

In the end, it was a not so productive meeting, but at least it was a fun one. The trio ended up spending a lot of time chatting over good food and weapon repair.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

[lgcminjxe]

இ SPRING BOYS THOUGHTS இ

Yoon Minjae had never imagined that he would be here. He never thought that he would make it onto Spring Boys. Most of all, he never thought he would be given a solo. No pressure or anything.

The closer it got to the recording of his solo mv, Minjae felt the pressure building on him. Was he ready to have a solo? Did he deserve it? Why had it been he that had been given a solo and not anyone else? What made him different? Was it Legacy’s way of embarrassing him? These thoughts and more ran through his head often and his coach noticed just how busy his mind was. The same coach that had been there for Minjae throughout the entire Spring Boys process.

Today was no different to any other day and Minjae found himself opening up easy. Now that everything was over and Spring Boys was finished, Minjae felt more relaxed. He used this moment to release all his thoughts and feelings that he has kept in throughout the show.

❛ How did your solo performance go? ❜

❛ You know obviously that I was so nervous about being given a solo and that I felt a lot of pressure because of it, right? ❜ He began. ❛ It turns out it was justified. After seeing all the other clubs and groups performing I was thoroughly impressed and scared that I would fail. When it was my turn to perform I almost cried. Sure, I’ve performed before but never solo like this and never under such conditions. But I’m glad I got to have that experience. I was able to learn and grow as an artist because of it. ❜ The coach nodded and Minjae let out a soft sigh of relief.

❛ What was it like bonding with the other boys? Easy I’m guessing since you’re so social, Minjae. ❜

Minjae nodded and smiled brightly. ❛ It was so much fun getting to know everyone and seeing how talented everyone was! Oh! Also getting to spend time with V&A sunbaenims was a dream come true. We had a lot of fun playing games and working together on performances and songs. It’s definitely an experience I won’t forget anytime soon and I hope I made some new friendships out of it. ❜

❛ You seem to enjoy performing a lot, Minjae-ah. Have you thought of switching paths? ❜

This question threw him for a moment as he wasn’t expecting it. He thought about it for a moment before he finally shook his head. ❛ Not at all. Sure, I love singing and performing, but I also love acting. If the chance was presented to me to become an idol I wouldn’t say no and I would happily accept it, but I don’t think I would switch paths. At least not yet. I love what I do and if I ever want to perform I can just audition for a musical, right? I’m not saying no to being an idol, but I enjoy being an actor too. ❜ Minjae smiled brightly at the coach.

[tren-fraszka]

Fall Anime 2022 summary

Since Fall 2022 anime was stacked I decided to make summary, because there’s so much good stuff. Am I slightly late? Yes. Does it really matter? No.

And to get it out of the way, I didn’t watch Chainswman anime, because I read the manga and found it not nearly as entertaining as most of the people do. Denji just really doesn’t work for me as protagonist.

I also dropped My Hero Academia, because I feel nothing, but pure disappointment for the direction its manga took.

Bocchi the Rock - best comedy and best exploration of social anxiety all at once. Those two elements shouldn’t work together so well and yet they do. If you want to see a girl with crippling social anxiety realizing her dreams to join a band and shred the guitar before actual live public then you won’t find anything better. No, scratch that, this is probably the best this fall anime season has to offer with extremely creative animation and well-crafted set characters that compliment each other perfectly

Gundam: Witch of Mercury - generational trauma the anime. The series is ongoing, but so far the setup had been excellent. The addition of school setting was actually a brilliant move, as it allowed to explore the twisted relationship between the wealthy corporation owners and their children. And have I mentioned the main plot centers around a lesbian engagement? This shows creates a beautiful intersection between a corporate profit, giant robots, personal vendettas, and teenagers entering adolescence.

Raven of the Inner Palace - a slowly burn romance between a young emperor and the girl with ability to summon ghosts, who’s confined inside the palace. With totally not Chinese palace as a backdrop to all the court intrigue and supernatural drama. If any of those elements sounds interesting then I would recommend it. The story isn’t finished and the second season is unlikely, but even then I enjoyed how different this story felt from everything else that aired this season.

Do It Yourself - fluffy story about DIY school club with some solid character interactions and nice jokes. It’s a pure feel good story, and it really excels in that aspect. It gets a bit ridiculous at the end with how far the characters go to not use their own money to resolve issues that could be really easily resolved that way. Still, it was a nice watch. I’d definitely recommend it if you want a series to cheer you up with unrelenting good vibes

I'm the Villainess, So I'm Taming the Final Boss - a solid if a bit too rushed comedy. Even if the final episode was painfully rushed, I think it’s still worth experiencing this hilarious romance of a go-getter villainess and a sadistic demon lord. Consistently strong gags and endearing characters make up for the failings, resulting in a pleasant if ultimately forgettable experience

Urusei Yatsura - Rumiko Takahashi’s old manga had received a new adaptation to prove that it contains plenty of joke that can entertain even the modern audience. The show will continue into the second season, but given that the plot is mostly an excuse for new gags, there’s no reason not to start now. There’s just a certain charm to Rumiko Takahashi’s style of comedy that’s still worth experiencing 

Management of a Novice Alchemist - A really wholesome story of an orphan attempting to maintain her own alchemy business with some surprisingly solid economic beats in it. Who will be able to wield capitalism to their advantage? This anime is just a good comfort food and I want to shout out the animator who despite the show having mostly average animation, just went really hard during some action cuts. They were only a few seconds long cuts, but I’ve seen you and I respect you.

Reincarnated as a Sword - exactly what it says on the tin. Rather than being an overpowered character in it’s own right, the next victim of Truck-kun reincarnates as a powerful sword who ends up saving a slave catgirl and decides to become her weapon so she can find happiness and achieve her dreams. Pretty wholesome and fun overall with announced continuation.

Bibliophile Princess - A romace involving a bookworm and a prince. I’ve seen people consistently complain that it’s a subpar adaptation and while I don’t know the source material I feel like they might have a point. It felt like this anime was constantly underutilizing its own potential, not using it’s medium to properly communicate plot or character moments and relaying way too much on telling viewers things which could have been shown. Still, it was a pleasant romance which had something going for it.

Spy x Family Part 2 - If you’ve seen first part you know exactly what to expect, though focusing more on shorter unconnected gags makes this half feel weaker overall. It’s still good, but ends up feeling a bit too diluted when it comes to the proportions of main plot and just pure gags

Welcome to Demon School, Iruma-kun S3 - remains the tastiest comfort food. My son grew up and went to win school’s survival tournament. I’m proud of him and all his friends, who are proving just how skilled they are.

Mob Psycho 100 S3 - a great send off for the series, though it did drag a bit for me at times. But the final arc was such a great conclusion that it easily makes for the slower pace of this season.

[nickgerlich]

C Is For Change

There are many things we can learn by studying consumers. We crave consistency, yet can be fickle. We can be all-in with some product categories, but couldn’t care less about others. We can be predictable to a fault, then turn around and do something completely unexpected. We differ between genders, age groups, income, education, geography…pick your demographic, but there is one thing that practically everyone demonstrates to some degree: Resistance to Change.

And I like to use capital-C Change, because it is a force more powerful than just the incremental progress we see day to day. Change, you see, can be very unsettling, no matter where the Change is happening. It can be a new boss, new minister, even new President. It can be shifting gender roles, marriage, and family. And it can happen in every avenue of business, from products and services to physical stores and e-commerce.

Naturally, there is variation between individuals too. Some people are quick to embrace the Change around them. It doesn’t matter, though, how open or closed we are to Change. There will always be some degree of friction when Change occurs, primarily because we become accustomed to a status quo. When that status quo is no more, then we have to adapt.

Which…drumroll, please…is what the folks at Sam’s Club will be watching in Grapevine Texas with their new prototype store. The 150,000-square foot retail bazaar has seemingly everything except one thing: checkout stands.

You shop, you scan, you go. Period. If you can’t handle that, then don’t even bother going.

Sam’s Club, which is owned by Walmart, sees this as the store of the future. That future, though, depends completely on how well this new concept is embraced by customers. Given that there are more than 20 other Sam’s Clubs in the DFW Metroplex, members have a choice and could shift their purchases to stores that still have checkouts. Those other stores offer a mix of Scan and Go, self-check, and traditional. I’m sure they will be watching the numbers closely.

But there are also other numbers to note, and that’s the data associated with those who have been using Scan and Go up until now. Scan and Go is experiencing rapid growth and adoption. Thus far, those people spend three times as much as others shopping at Sam’s, and are more loyal. This translates to more membership renewals as well. That’s another way of saying this is a great group of shoppers, perhaps so great as to bet the farm on them.

It’s all part of parent company Walmart’s push into all things digital, and they are crushing it between all of their retail formats. But Sam’s, with 600 stores and annual sales of $84.3 billion, pales in comparison to rival Costco, which has 614 stores in the US but sales of nearly $250 billion. In other words, Costco is selling three times as much as Sam’s with practically the same number of stores.

No wonder Sam’s wants to court its Scan and Go customers, because…in case you already forgot…they purchase three times as much as others in the store. The disparity could smooth out pretty quickly if the new store format is a success.

The big question is what would happen to those shoppers who still want to check out among the other ways, but could no longer do so if Sam’s commits to Scan and Go only. Would they fail to renew their membership? Would they shop elsewhere?

Remember, Change can be very painful for some people. There are many among us who refuse to do any kind of self-checkout, either because of technology fear, virtue signaling their support of labor, or just a personal preference for human interaction. I can already think of one family member—my brother—who would have difficulty with this. Too much Change, too fast.

Me? I want to see this, and when I do my December Tour of Texas photography junket, I will make sure to go through Grapevine. I don’t have a problem with this kind of Change, but more importantly, I owe it to my students to stay on top of things like this.

What about you? Are you part of the resistance, or would you give this a go? The folks in Bentonville Arkansas will be watching and waiting your verdict.

Dr “Play It Again, Sam” Gerlich

Audio Blog

[emp13]

For my first game summary I’m gonna summarize the 5th session which was the most recent. The coterie meets at Scyllas club to celebrate and debrief the two members who were absent last session. I’ll get into that story at a later date though.

They then decide to talk to one of the more influential members of the new Primogens domain, Miguel Ramirez, a Lasombra who’s been a part of the Camarilla for his 40 years of unlife who is also a Catholic priest. Due to some tension Jack and Elizabeth walk there and Kyler uses his familus to fly him there in rat form, Miss Anderson takes her old Civic while Freya, Scylla’s driver, drives her and Victoria. Speaking of Victoria our Ventrue, she is tragically disadvantaged here due to her supernatural aversion to saintly imagery. This means she just stays in just barely in the church. They arrive at the end of Saturday evening Mass which is given my father Miguel. The coterie excluding Victoria go to meet with him to much success and he’s in favor of Kyler as Primogen. Though the arrival of Minerva a nomadic Malkavian who travels with her coterie around the country and is dressed like a nun arrives as she has business with the father. Now there are three stories following events of three members of the Coterie.

First is Anna Anne Anderson, who is asked to stay in father Miguel’s office by Minerva. She reveals herself as a Salubri as she takes off her habit to reveal the 3rd eye. She tells Anna that she’s her old friend who she met on SchreckNet back in the day. Minerva reveled she was here so that she and Miguel could discuss enlightenment a topic both of them are interested in. Anna was rightfully shocked and didn’t know how to respond, she left pretty quickly.

While this was happening our dear “straight girl” Elizabeth went to a pew to give a quick prayer before she left. While this is happening she feels a tap on her shoulder, it’s Eve her “old friend.” They both stare forward as they talk and Elizabeth is shocked Eve would even want to talk to her but Eve felt it might be her only chance. I’ll recreate a part of the scene I particularly liked as best I can.

Elizabeth takes Eves hand in hers.

Eve responds with “Liz, your hands, they’re freezing” with a slight tremble to her voice.

“You know I’ve always run cold” retorts Elizabeth.

Eve with her other hand sandwiches Elizabeth’s hands cueing Elizabeth to activate the blush of life to make herself seem more human causing the beast to gnaw at her to take a bite from Eve. Elizabeth not trying to draw suspicion from her coterie she doesn’t know that well yet tells Eve to meet her back here in a week and Eve agrees.

For the last mini story the 4 vampires could make two perception checks, one for identifying anything about the events that had just transpired. Somehow everyone failed every roll, Victoria even got a beastial failure on one. This triggered the beast to go paranoid and activated the paranoia compulsion. Her first instinct was to find a driver and get out of here and back to her building. She gets into Scyllas car and with her vampiric power demands Freya drive her to her building and she complies unable to do anything else really. She gets back to her building and locks everything down.

With all this resolved, the coterie leaves the church, much to Scyllas confusion though, her driver and Victoria are gone. She gets Freya back here eventually but she isn’t happy with what Victoria did. That’s where the session ended.