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onlydreamofmysoul · 3 years ago

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Let Them Eat Cake: The Final

We made it! I want to thank you guys so so much for the fantastic support you've given this story, it means the world to me. Bake Off has a special place in my heart and so does this fic, so its been so great to share it with you all!

(Links to all previous chapters can be found pinned on my page under 'Let Them Eat Cake' or pop over to my AO3 - link in bio)

Without further ado, I give you... The Final!

This week on the final of The Great British Bake Off…

“It looks like you’re having a smashing time.”

“Tell us about your first kiss.”

“And the winner is…”

Remus Lupin was having a nice morning.

There had been nothing of interest to note, however he didn’t have an alarm blaring and he was warm and snuggly, so all in all, he took it as a win.

Until one Lily Evans took it upon herself to sneak into his room and throw herself on him like she was a kid on Christmas morning.

“Finals, finals, finals!” She exclaimed, managing to find a tone that was somehow both singing and chanting all at once.

“Jesus fucking Christ.” Remus groaned, covering his eyes with his forearms. “Can I go back in time and just never apply to this fucking competition?”

Lily rolled off him, her big green eyes staring at him concerned. “What's the matter? Do you not want to be here?”

Remus peeked out at her. “No, I don’t want you to be here.” He smirked as she rolled her eyes, flopping back on the pillows next to him.

“Asshat.” She grumbled, hitting his shoulder with a light ‘thwack’. “I was worried for a sec.”

Remus grinned at her and then stared up at the ceiling for a long moment, only the sounds of their breathing and his heartbeat in his ears to keep him company.

Finals, they had made it to the finals.

He still couldn’t quite believe it. “Welcome to the finals.” McGonagall had said to him just before he left the tent, the words playing over and over again in his head, as clear as if she had said them yesterday.

(Which in fact, she had. This was the first time Remus would go to the practice tent and Tonks wouldn’t be there, but there was still an undeniable elation blossoming in his chest).

Five days until filming resumed. Six until the winner was announced. It didn’t seem real.

(But if this were a fantasy, Remus never wanted to return to reality).

“So where’s Sirius on this fine morning?” Lily asked, breaking the silence. Remus turned his head to look at her, completely relaxed and sinking into the bed. It would seem his lazy morning mood had seeped into her instead of her vibrant energy going to him.

“We’re not together every night.” He said, looking at the freckles splashed across her nose. They were darker now than they had been when they arrived. “We’re taking things slow.”

Lily just stared at him sceptically.

“It’s true!” He defenced. “We are!”

“You’re such a bad liar.”

“Am not!”

“Are too!”

Remus groaned and smacked her with a pillow. Victory.

“You never answered the question.” Lily said, muffled under the cushion. Or maybe victory had another champion in mind.

“Okay yes, he’s here most nights, but it doesn’t feel fast.” He defended, and it was true. Somehow it felt almost like they had known each other forever and yet still there was the thrill and excitement that came with everything being so new.

“It doesn’t seem fast either.” Lily reassured. “Maybe for others it would be, but I think it’s right for you two.”

Remus let out a little breath of relief. He hadn’t been worried exactly, but his thoughts had slipped in that direction a few times. More than anything, he just worried about scaring Sirius off, while still feeling secure in himself? Remus really didn’t know, the emotion centre of his body was really sending out mixed signals these days.

He had just decided to say fuck it to logic and stick to how he felt. And he felt good. Really good.

“Not that this little revelation wasn’t nice,” Lily said, “But you still haven’t answered the question I asked. Little tip? If this baking thing doesn’t work out, definitely don’t become a spy. If you were captured you’d accidentally reveal all the information without them even having to ask you.”

Remus groaned. “I hate you. He and James were hanging out last night.”

Lily grinned, satisfied and gave Remus another little shove. “Okay, come on I wanna go bake.”

“You’d think you’d have enough baking for a lifetime.” Remus grumbled but he got up all the same. In actuality, now that he was awake, Remus too was buzzing to get into the tent and get to work. “What’re you planning for this week?” He asked as he threw on a pair of jeans and a hoodie, having taken a shower the night before.

“I can’t give away my secrets!” Lily teased, holding open the door as Remus grabbed his key and they both swept out of the room and down the plush carpeted corridor.

“You are aware I’m gonna find out either way right? Cause if you still haven’t grasped that concept then I’m a little worried to be-”

“Oh hush,” Lily laughed, pressing her palm to Remus’ mouth. “I’m still not a hundred percent sure to be honest.”

They stepped outside, the cool crisp air falling over them, revitalizing them. Remus tucked his hands into his pockets and felt his shoulders hunch a little. His lungs liked the cold, the rest of his body - not so much.

“I’m not sure if I know what I’m doing either.” He admitted. “I have a few ideas, but none of them feel quite right, you know?”

Lily nodded as they reached the practice tent, pulling open the door. “Yeah I think that’s my issue too. There’s suddenly so much pressure and nothing I consider seems to be good enough.”

Remus sighed as he pulled two aprons off the hooks and tossed one to Lily. “I suppose we’ll have to figure it out.” He said, before taking out the recipe cards he had brought with him and began flicking through them for inspiration.

Five days. He could do this.

“Well, well, well, look who we have here.” Remus said with a grin as he trod through the grass, rounding the big oak tree to see Sirius waiting on their swing.

“I know,” Sirius drawled. “It’s almost like we planned it.”

Remus smiled, sitting by his side, holding the rope in one hand as he held out a Tupperware encased offering. “Want some cake?”

Sirius took the box gladly, his hair tied up but the wind had claimed a few loose strands, whipping them around his face like a dark halo. “Always. What kind?”

Remus tucked one foot into his chest, resting his cheek on his knee as he studied the other man. “Try it and find out.”

Sirius' lips quirked at Remus’ teasing tone, looking at the deep brown colour that really could only be one flavour. “Elderflower?” He joked.

Remus laughed and took a bite himself before holding out to Sirius. “Yes,” He said, completely deadpan. “That’s exactly what it is.”

Sirius smiled and kissed him, biting his lip as he pulled away. “You taste like chocolate.”

Remus flushed. “Don’t you mean elderflower?”

Sirius chuckled, rocking the swing a little more, tilting his head back to look at the twisting branches above them. “Look,” He murmured, pointing to a clump of twigs high in the tree. “A bird's nest.” Remus followed his line of sight and watched as a bird swooped overhead and landed in it gracefully.

“That was kinda cool.”

“Let’s hope it doesn’t shit on us.”

“Sirius!” Remus exclaimed, elbowing the other man as he laughed. “Let’s hope your hair can take the hit and shield us.”

“Oi! My hair is what should be protected at all costs, it’s a national treasure. You know, I think I should replace you with Tonks, she knows the importance of hair care.”

Remus smiled, resting his head on Sirius’ shoulder, the fabric of his jacket soft against his cheek. “Tell me something I don't know about you.”

The wind whipped through the branches, but Remus wasn’t cold pressed up against Sirius. The tree sheltered them from the worst of it and the weather was slowly getting a little warmer, daffodils springing up all around the tent. There were many things Remus had always wanted but never saw himself actually achieving. Coming to bake off was one. Making it to the final was another. And perhaps the most notable - finding someone who might love him as much as he loved them. And yet, here he was with all three.

“When I was a kid, I used to want to be a dog so bad, I was always getting in trouble for wearing holes in my pants because I would crawl instead of walking normally. I even refused to answer to ‘Sirius’.”

“Oh yeah?” Remus asked, amused. “What was your alter ego’s name then?”

He could hear Sirius’ smile even if he couldn’t see it. “Padfoot. He was this big black dog. I got the idea after I read about ‘The Grimm’ in one of my cousin’s books and I guess it kind of stuck.”

“Padfoot,” Remus repeated, unable to stop himself. “I like that.”

“Your turn,” Sirius urged, nudging Remus lightly. “Tell me something I don’t know about you.”

Remus’ heart fluttered, stomach rolling a little, he had news for Sirius, and had honestly engineered the entire conversation just to tell him, but now that the moment was here, he was getting nervous.

“I’ve been offered a job in London.”

Sirius froze under Remus’ cheek. “In London?”

“Yeah.”

“London, England?”

Remus chuckled as he sat up to look at Sirius’ stunned face, grey eyes wide, lips parted. “Yes, London, England.”

Sirius blinked. “But I live in London.”

Remus pursed his lips, trying not to smile too much. “I’m aware of this, yes.”

“You… we… we’d be living in the same country. In the same city.”

“That’s what I’m saying.”

“Remus motherfucking Lupin, that's the best thing I’ve heard all week.”

“Your flour is about to tip over.” Tonks commented, carelessly filing her nails over facetime as Remus ran around his station, trying to do several things at once.

“Oh my god Lupin, you’re a disaster, how did you even get into this competition?” Tonks teased as Remus caught the flour but promptly dropped it on the flour, a white cloud erupting, coating everything in a two meter radius in powder.

“Not very helpful.” Remus grumbled as he shook flour out of his hair and grabbed a cloth to wipe down the counter.

“I wasn’t trying to be helpful.” Tonks paused and looked at the recipe Remus had sent her. “You’re gonna need at least double the vanilla extract than what you have there.” Remus grabbed the recipe and looked it over, seeing she was right. “See?” Tonks said gleefully as Remus scratched out the original amount. “That was me being helpful.”

Remus rolled his eyes, but blew her a kiss, wiping the dusty screen of his phone which had not escaped the great flour disaster.

“Come on,” He said as he walked with his phone to the store room, as if Tonks had any other choice than to accompany him. “We’re gonna get some more flour.” He set his phone down on a shelf as he looked for the right flour, Tonks chatting away. If Remus closed his eyes he could almost pretend she was right there with him, the pair of them practising for whatever challenges they were soon to face.

“So where’s Lily on this fine evening?” Tonks questioned. “Don’t you two usually practice together around now?”

“Yeah,” Remus grunted as he picked up his phone, tucking it under his chin with his hands full. “But she was busy tonight.”

“No fucking way, she’s with James?”

“Well, I don’t know for sure.” Remus admitted, “But she sounded pretty suspicious.”

“Ooh.” Tonks gasped and Remus began carefully measuring flour and continuing where he left off. “All the Bake Off love this year.”

Remus laughed as he folded in his sugar, putting the batter in the oven before beginning to prepare the icing. “Oh hush you.”

Tonks just winked, sticking out her tongue. “You know you love me.”

“Ladies and gentlemen, I am pleased as punch to welcome you to this year's Great British Bake off; the final!”

Sirius groaned, head tipping back at James’ enthusiastic introduction. “You did not just say ‘pleased as punch’.”

James feigned being hurt, placing a hand over his heart. “What would you prefer? Pleased as pudding? Pleased as pie?”

Sirius looked straight into the camera, his face blank but his amused eyes giving him away. “Someone please give me a new co-host, I can’t take this anymore.”

James laughed as he threw an arm over Sirius’ shoulder, the two of them easing the nerves of everyone in the tent tenfold. “Don’t worry Sirius darling, you haven’t got too long left with me because, like I said, we’ve reached the final!”

Remus smiled, hiding the hands he was wringing together under the table. It was the weirdest feeling - he was at once completely calm and so incredibly nervous. He couldn’t help but giggle at the antics of the infamous marauders and recalled that morning, lying in bed when Sirius had queried how much bullshit he’d be able to spout without any prior preparation. Remus had told him to go get ready but had promptly led them to activities that were in no way helpful to the rest of the day's events.

(It had been a good way to start the day though).

McGonagall and Dumbledore stood at the front of the tent, looking out at the eerily empty work stations, only three now filled. Remus and Lily were in the front two and Kingsley had come up to slot in behind Lily.

“We have a very exciting two days lined up,” Sirius said as he clasped his hands together, a natural in front of the cameras. Our bakers have no overall theme, so we’re going to get to see a little splash of everything!”

“For our signature challenge, our bakers have been asked to bake something that fits in with the theme of ‘final’’.” James said, taking his turn to speak again. “It can be anything from a cake inspired by the final book in a series or the last thing you had to eat, because tonight, there are no limits other than your imagination.”

Remus snorted and Sirius’ eyes found his as he elbowed James lightly. “Dramatic much.” He drawled before rubbing his hands together gleefully. “Are you ready?”

“On your marks,”

“Get set.”

“Bake!”

Remus hadn’t realised how much he would miss Tonks in the tent. He had missed her all week, but it wasn’t as if they ever had much chance to chat while they were filming, so he had thought it would be a little easier. But the tent was unusually quiet without her clattering at her station, inevitably breaking at least one piece of crockery per challenge.

“It’s too quiet,” Lily murmured, echoing Remus’ thoughts. “I almost feel like we’re not allowed to talk.”

Remus chuckled, remembering exams in home economics when he had been in secondary school and the teacher who would happily dole out zero marks if she so much as saw your lips move.

He grinned, taking a bowl he didn’t need from his station and ‘accidentally’ dropping it on the ground, the ceramic splitting with a loud crack.

“Oops!” He said loudly, glad he hadn’t ever tried to go into the theatre business, he was truly a terrible actor, and ran to grab a broom, not without winking at Lily who blew him a kiss.

“Much better, thanks!” She yelled after him and he just chuckled, disposing of the broken bowl, but not without slipping a shard into his apron pockets to take home with him as a little reminder.

Sirius meandered over after a little while as Remus put a tin in the oven to cook the soon-to-be sponge fingers for his tiramisu.

“You seem to be having a smashing time.” Sirius teased, his eyes alight.

“James already made that joke a few weeks ago.” Remus said laughing as he poured double cream into a bowl. “It’s really not that funny.”

Sirius just stuck out his tongue and moved to the next station, but Remus knew that had it been just the two of them, it was far more likely that Sirius would have taken much offence to the attack on his sense of humour, and a good snog would have been needed to make up for it.

James arrived no sooner than Sirius had left, peering into the bowl of ingredients that Remus was whipping, looking very much like he was contemplating dipping his finger in for a taste.

Marlene arrived, camera on her shoulder, surveying Remus’ station, sceptically watching Remus grate his dark chocolate.

“So Remus,” She began, fiddling with the lens to zoom in on his hands. “What has tiramisu got to do with the ‘final’ theme?”

“Well,” He said, suddenly feeling shy, wishing he didn’t have to explain. “Tonks, Andromeda Tonks, that is, had been planning to make a tiramisu for this episode, but she unfortunately was eliminated last week, so instead I’m making it.”

Some of the crew members cooed softly and Remus rolled his eyes, even as he blushed. “Yeah, yeah, yeah, I’m a big softie.” He glanced at Marlene once, smirking, then returned to his work, “Now fuck off and let me get on with it.”

“One of these days, Remus motherfucking Lupin,” Marlene grumbled as she walked away, not before snagging a square of chocolate to munch on, “One of these days I’m going to get you back.”

Remus’ dish was made pretty quickly, the most important part was leaving it in the fridge for as long as possible, so as soon as he had carefully layered the sponge and cream and chocolate of course, he set the fridge to the lowest temperature and put the big dish in. He had an idea of how he wanted to present it, but that all depended on whether or not it would be set properly.

He cleaned his station and set up everything he needed for when the dessert was set, but that only took ten minutes. Watching Lily and Kingsley rush around their stations while Remus had nothing left to do made him feel like he was back in school, the horrid panic of completing a test, thinking it was easy, then looking up to discover everyone else was still working intently. He put himself to work to avoid the fluttering in his chest, different to the loved up buzz he had been experiencing recently, no this tightness was more akin to the ‘oh no have I had ten shots of espresso’ variety. Remus wasn’t the biggest fan.

He made tea for the crew, including the judges and presenters, checked the progress of his dish, then made himself walk away from the fridge, lest he open it too often and slow down the cooling process. He chatted with Lily a bit while she worked and did an interview with James and Sirius, some more filler content now that there weren’t nearly as many bakers to keep up with, but the airing time of the show hadn’t changed.

“Need a hand?” He offered, turning to Lily who was crouched by her oven, gazing intently at her cake. “Nah I’m good.” She said, not looking up, “I don’t have anything to do until this little guy is cooked.”

“They never tell you how much waiting around there is.” Remus groaned, hopping up on his worktop. “I have been just sitting here for the best part of over an hour and I bet none of this is going to make the final cut.”

“You’d be right there!” Marlene chimed in, passing them on her way to video whatever complicated technique Kingsley was currently demonstrating. Remus raised an eyebrow at Lily, sighed and jumped off the counter. “I’m gonna check on my cakes now, thank you very much.”

Remus both loved and hated how there was no official ranking for the first challenge. He definitely loved it on days where he hadn’t done very well and didn’t want his failings it be broadcasted even more than they already had been, but today, with only three contestants left and the competition tangible, he wanted to know how much more impressive his next two bakes were going to have to be.

He supposed it didn’t really matter - he was going to do his very best no matter what.

Lily had made a cake shaped like a knitted hat, the piping terrifyingly realistic, in commemoration of the last hat her grandmother had made before she passed away. Kingsley had a coffee flavoured graduation cap to honour his girlfriend who was in her final year of college.

“We’re a bunch of sentimental saps.” Lily muttered to them both as they all walked out of the tent to go for lunch, the judges' praises ringing in their ears. They all seemed to be standing on equal footing for now.

“I know,” Remus groaned, throwing himself down on the grass under the sun. “I should have just done like, the final countdown or something.”

“Tonks is never gonna let you live this down.” Kinsley piped in.

“God, don’t remind me. I might just have to kill her before the episode airs, you know, save my reputation and all.”

“Oh, a spot of murder, how lovely.” James chirped as he and Sirius arrived, having been sent to retrieve all of their lunches, the three bakers claiming that they were too tired and as they always fed everyone else, it was time to switch it up.

James passed out sandwiches, pulling them from a bag, while Sirius handed Remus a salad.

Remus kissed Sirius on the cheek, “Thanks sweetheart.”

It took Remus a moment to realise what he had done, a moment more to remember that it was only Kingsley who hadn’t already known about their relationship. Kingsley who was looking very nonchalant and in no way surprised.

“Oh,” He said between bites, looking at Remus and Sirius’ panicked looks. “Was this meant to be a secret?”

Remus just burst out laughing, any tension that had appeared, vanishing in seconds. “I suppose we’re not very good at hiding it, huh?”

“Oi, speak for yourself.” Sirius jostled as he unwrapped his sandwich. “I’m an excellent secret keeper.”

“Alright everybody, welcome to the technical challenge of this year’s final!” James reintroduced them, everyone having returned to their stations, fresh aprons tied around their waist and judges standing at the top of the room watching over the proceedings.

“For our last technical challenge, the judges are asking you to make a classic sponge cake, but with a little twist.”

Remus eyed the mysterious pile of ingredients under the cloth on his table. He both loved and hated that blue and white gingham pattern, hated it because he wasn’t the biggest lover of surprises, and loved it because… well, because it was cute.

(Not every answer was super deep. The Pinterest boy in him was in love with the entire aesthetic of The Great British Bake Off).

“Our lovely judges have also requested that you make at least twelve meringue kisses to top your sponge cake.”

Remus raised his eyebrows in surprise - it wasn’t like the judges to add anything to something as classic as a sponge cake, but who was he to question? This was the final, anything was possible.

James and Sirius chattered on for a few more minutes, and then they were off, the three contestants whipping off their gingham cloths like a magician unveiling his assistant. Remus barely glanced at the vague recipe before setting off to make the meringues first. Their small size was deceptive and that’s why Remus thought the judges had included them - but they would take the most time to bake and cool.

He set about whipping egg whites and sugar as Marlene arrived by his side, taking a moment just to pan the camera over everything he was doing.

“Meringue kisses,” Marlene said, with a smug sounding tone. “Such a cute name. Go on Remus, tell us about your first kiss.”

Remus laughed, caught off guard, nearly spilling the extra sugar he was adding to the bowl. “Alright, which first kiss do you want to hear about? Cause technically I have a few.”

Marlene giggled with him and Remus felt like he was a schoolgirl, chatting about boys and kisses, like they were the beginning and end of everything. “The very first one.”

Remus could help but laugh again, shaking his head fondly at the memory. “It was awful.” he said, chuckling to himself. “I was thirteen and I kissed this girl called Mary on a dare.” He paused to look at the camera more directly. “Mary if you’re watching this, I’d apologise but we both know I’m right. That was a shit kiss.”

Remus grinned as he realised Marlene was going to let that explicative slide for the purpose of the story. Victorious at last.

“What about your other ‘first’ kisses.” Marlene prompted, overall looking thoroughly delighted by the stories. Remus paused for a moment to stop his mixer and run a spatula around the edge of the bowl to ensure everything was mixing well, before turning the mixer back on and stepping back.

“Well my first kiss with a boy was a year later and since my previous make-out experience consisted of the one kiss you already know about, I think it’s fair to say; that was pretty crap too.” He grinned at Marlene and started measuring the butter for his cake. “But it did solve the whole ‘sexuality crisis’ thing I had going on, so that was fun.”

He deemed his meringue mix whipped-enough so he carefully spooned batches into an icing bag and began piping tiny amounts onto a baking sheet.

“Then I suppose, there’s your first kiss with someone who really matters,” He said carefully, not looking up from his work. “With the person who’s so amazing that every kiss feels a little bit like the first one. Kinda makes you feel like every other kiss you’ve ever had was just practice for this exact moment.”

Remus was aware that his cheeks were a little pink, but then again, when were they not?

“And you’ve found that person?” Marlene asked softly, as Remus piped his last little swirl. He didn’t have to think about it, but he did suppose he should tell the person in question before quite literally broadcasting it to the nation. So instead he just winked.

“Sirius,” Remus said softly, later that night as they lay in bed, a movie playing in the background, Remus’ adrenaline still high from winning the technical challenge. “I know it’s early, so I'm not expecting anything back but since I might have just heavily implied it on national television I figured I should probably tell you that I’m in love with you.”

Sirius’ head didn’t move from Remus’ chest, instead he reached out and grabbed Remus’ free hand, pressing his knuckles to his soft lips. “I know.”

“You do?” Remus asked incredulously, trying (and failing) not to splutter.

Sirius chuckled, his voice deep. “Yeah, you said it in your sleep last night. Plus, I watched over the footage from today and I saw.”

Remus blushed. “Oh.”

Sirius twisted in his arms so Remus could finally see his eyes. They were sparkling and a playful smile twisted on Sirius’ lips.

“I love you too, you know.” Sirius said casually, as if commenting on the weather. Remus let his head drop back onto the pillow as a whoosh of relief escaped his mouth. Sure he hadn't expected to have Sirius say it back but this feeling was like nothing he had ever experienced before.

“Well no, I didn’t, actually.” Remus quipped, much to the ceiling’s amusement. “But it’s good to know.”

Suddenly Sirius was leaning over him, his hair falling around their faces like a dark curtain. “So are you gonna kiss me or what?”

Remus bit his lip, failing in his attempt not to smile. “Nah,” He said, a blatant lie as he raised himself onto his elbows and pressed their lips together. Sirius twisted so he could support himself on one arm, cupping Remus’ face with the other. “I loved what you said earlier,” He murmured against Remus’ lips. “About the first kiss thing. And I really, really love you.”

Remus just grinned against Sirius’ lips and pulled him closer. “Love you too. Now shut up and kiss me.”

“What’re you looking all smug about?” Lily teased, bumping their hips together as they strolled down to the tent. Remus had so many reasons for the butterflies in his chest, he could hardly stop his hands from shaking, but the smile hadn’t left his face since he woke up.

“Oh you know,” He said, waving his hand in feigned nonchalance. “I’m just a boy in love.”

“Fuck off, you said ‘I love you’?” Lily asked, her voice going up an octave.

“Mhm,” Remus confirmed, nodding. “So now you need to woman-up and kiss James fucking Potter like we both know you’ve wanted to do since the first day.” Lily looked as if she might protest, but Remus cut her off. “We both know I’m right. Plus, it’s fairly obvious that the feeling’s mutual, so for the love of all things holy, put the rest of us out of our misery and just snog the poor bugger.”

Lily laughed, even as she blushed and tried to shrug Remus off. “You know,” She started, shooting him a glare that was in no way intimidating. “I’m really not sure I like ‘in love Remus’.”

Remus just winked and kissed the top of her head, smirking wickedly. “I think we both know that’s a lie.”

“It’s here, the final.”

“We’ve already completed half of the final James.”

“Yeah but this is like… the final part of the final.”

“Someone please tell me why I’m friends with this bloke.”

“Oi!”

“Anyways!” Sirius interrupted. “I suppose James wasn’t fully wrong. We made it to the final stretch.”

“It’s time,” James took over, “For my personal favourite challenge. The showstopper.”

Sirius clasped his hands together in front of himself and Remus had to stop himself from staring at the movement. “For our final showstopper, our judges would like to see you recreate a memory.”

“It could be anything,” James continued, “From a chocolate Easter egg to a fondue waterfall, but it has to be your own memory and most importantly, it has to be edible.”

“Otherwise; we’d be the Great British Fake Off.” Sirius quipped and everyone in the tent collectively groaned, which only seemed to spur Sirius on even more.

“If our bakers are ready, I think we’ll begin. Ready Prongs?”

“Ready Pads.”

“On your marks,”

“Get set,”

“Bake!”

And maybe for the first time starting a challenge, Remus’ hands didn’t shake.

“Wotcha-makin?” Sirius asked, leaning around one side of Remus as James curved around the other.

“Cake.” Remus replied, not looking at either of them as he carefully evened out the batter in his tin before popping it in the oven. He then turned to face the two presenters, giving them exactly thirty seconds of his time for a round of rapid fire questions before he had to rush straight back into his work.

“What are you making?”

“A swing in a tree.”

“What kind of cake are you working with?”

“Mostly chocolate, but I have a few other elements working in.”

“What’s the memory you chose?”

Remus smiled softly. “One of my first real kisses.”

Sirius and James thanked him and left again, allowing him to get back to work. Remus had already filled Sirius in on all the details of his cake, he had even checked that it would be okay to use that idea in the first place. Sirius had just kissed him in response, enthusiastically and at length. The bakers had given all their details to the presenters and the camera crew before, so they could insert a voice-over effect to inform the audience of what was happening as the contestants were even more busy and focused than usual and weren’t giving too many interviews.

Remus had chosen several circular cake pans, in a range of different sizes and was going to stack all the cakes they produced on top of one another to create the tree trunk. The top of the tree was going to be made of a mix of white chocolate melted over Rice Krispies (with a little dash of green food dye thrown in) and moulded to look like the leafy crown of a tree in the summer. The swing would be the hardest to add, made of carefully moulded chocolate, Remus would have to be careful not to make the seat too heavy so that the ‘ropes’ and the actual tree itself would support its weight.

After taking all of his cakes out of the oven and setting them out to cool, and creating the swing set, Remus made the chocolate buttercream icing that would decorate the tree trunk. He carefully layered his cakes, using a knife to cut off the rough edges and make the cake slope gently upwards before slathering on thick layers of icing. Taking out a small, delicate knife, Remus carefully cut lines and patterns into the icing, aiming for it to look like the bark of a tree. Finally satisfied, he began melting the white chocolate to make the tree top.

“Looking good Re!” Lily enthused from behind her, forearms splattered in icing as she decorated her own cake, a letter with a bright red seal. Kingsley was working away too, apparently recreating the cover of the CD he bought the day his daughter was born.

“Celine Dion,” He had told Remus yesterday, chuckling. “I had never listened to her before, I don’t even know why I bought it, I just left the hospital with a need to celebrate and the music shop was the first place I came across. But what do you know? It turns out that my little girl loves it.”

Remus grinned at the memory, sweet even to him and admired Lily’s cake out loud. “It’s the acceptance letter to my college,” She was explaining to the camera. “I got a full scholarship, so it’s pretty special.”

Remus turned his attention to his now-melted chocolate and added the green carefully, not wanting to make it too light or two dark. He had found that five drops got him the colour he was looking for - the pale chocolate requiring that little extra for the colour to darken. He then added the cereal and stirred it in together, folding it in with his spatula.

He gave his hands a thorough wash again as he waited for the mixture to cool just enough that he could mould it, but not so much that it set, and got back to work, spooning the green mix on top of his tree trunk until there was enough for him to start shaping it. He attached the chocolate swing very carefully as soon as he was satisfied and brought it straight to the fridge to set.

And then he was done.

He looked around the tent, thinking surely this couldn’t be it, he must have something more to do, but no, there was nothing left. His cake was made and decorated and now only time could tell what would happen next.

Feeling a tad useless, Remus set about cleaning his station and clicked the kettle, fulfilling his tradition in providing the crew with tea. He had just made his own one when James announced the official ten minute warning. They were nearly done.

Suddenly Remus’ heart was in his chest. He had been impeccably calm until this moment, a fact that had surprised him but he hadn’t questioned as it was much easier to bake when your hands weren’t shaking and your heart wasn’t thundering. But all the adrenaline rushed into him now as he realised that one way or another, he was finished with the Great British Bake Off.

At the ‘two minutes’ call, Remus took his cake out of the fridge and gave it a final look over. He tweaked the carving in the tree trunk and double checked that the swing would hold its place and then Sirius asked everyone to step away from their creations.

Dumbledore and McGonagall re-entered the room. Remus’ pulse matched every step they took.

“Kingsley,” They called, and the man in question carefully walked his cake to the table at the top of the tent. Remus watched as the judges 'oohed' and 'awed', admiring the level of detail, right down to the serial number Kingsley had apparently memorised.

Lily went next, her piping skills on display, demonstrating her lovely cursive handwriting that read her own name and an edited home address, signed and sealed by the headmaster. In their practice bakes, Remus had seen many versions of the cake on display but he had no doubt that this was her best work yet.

Finally it was Remus’ turn, and he walked up to the front carefully, trying to keep his breathing even. He had a mental image of himself falling and his cake going everywhere but he batted it out of his mind. His cake was the tallest by far and god, he could only hope, the best.

Sirius caught his eye as they cut the cake and winked. To anyone else, it would look like a presenter trying to calm the nerves of a contestant, but Remus heard the words that had been whispered to him that morning as the sun rose.

“You’re gonna win this.”

Remus had blushed and batted him away, but Sirius had looked at him earnestly. “No, Re, seriously. They base these things on who does best that week. And you’ve already won the technical. If you go and blow them away today, just like you always do, you’ve got this in the bag.”

Remus blushed and hit his face in a pillow but he linked their legs together.

“Besides,” Sirius teased, rolling on his back and tucking his arms under his head. Cocky. “You’ve already won the best prize.”

Remus had playfully kicked his ankle and Sirius’ resounding laugh still echoed in his ears.

“Ah, Mr Lupin,” Dumbledore began casually as he picked up a knife, perhaps unaware that he held Remus’ future in his hands. “This is rather impressive.”

Remus swallowed as the slices were cut and set onto plates. “Thank you.”

“You have no adventurous flavours for us I see,” McGonagall observed as she picked up her fork.

“No,” Remus confirmed. “Chocolate is my speciality, and well, I wanted to keep it simple.”

That seemed to be all the commentary they wanted as they both nodded with a small smile and took a bite.

“Excellent Mr Lupin.” McGonagall said. And that was it. They were done. The judges thanked them all and retreated to the back room to do whatever it is the judges do and make some decisions. The cast broke into a round of applause and Remus tugged Lily under his arm, Kingsley joining the little hug soon after.

“Can you believe that’s it?” Lily asked them and the two boys just shook their heads.

“No more non-stop baking.” Kingsley sighed. “I don’t know if I’m sad or relieved.”

“Both.” Remus laughed. “Definitely both.”

“Okay you lot,” James interrupted. “We have a little something for you outside.”

They all grinned. As loyal bake-off fans, they all knew what was coming. They walked outside the tent to picnic tables set up and laden with the cakes they made that day, along with all the eliminated contestants of that year and the families of the finalists.

Remus beamed at Tonks before sweeping his mother up into a hug.

“I’m so proud of you!” Hope said to him as she gripped him close. Remus chuckled as he bent to half his size, squeezing her just as tight. “Thanks Mam.”

“Now introduce me to this man of yours.” Hope teased, speaking low even though the microphones were elsewhere and they were surrounded by noise. Remus flushed, but he beckoned Sirius over with a tilt of his chin, so subtle no camera could have caught it. Remus had told his mom about everything and she had been begging for more information, only just stopping short of looking up celebrity gossip, although she did send Remus one or two pictures of Sirius on red carpets with the caption ‘your children would be beautiful’.

Sirius looked more nervous than Remus had ever seen him, holding his hand out to be shaken, but Hope just pulled him into a hug.

“It’s lovely to meet you Mrs Lupin,” Sirius said, looking a little surprised as Hope cupped his face in her hands and gave him a proper look. Remus hid his laugh in his elbow as Hope patted Sirius’ cheek fondly. “You’ve got good taste.” She said to him, tilting her head towards Remus, who blushed.

“The best.” Sirius agreed.

“Remus!” Tonks yelled, tired of being ignored and pulled Remus’ attention elsewhere. “Your cake was brilliant!”

Remus laughed running his fingers through his hair, the pink staining his cheeks permanent it would seem. “Thanks Tonks.”

The bright haired woman just grinned and wrapped an arm around Remus before cheerfully introducing herself to Hope. Sirius excused himself as he had to go with James to chat with the judges and Lily joined them with her parents, Kingsley standing with his family and talking to Fabian about knitting of all things. They sat in the garden, the sun shining bright, a few fluffy white clouds lazing their way across the sky. They chatted about everything and nothing as they munched on an endless amount of cake, Remus just sipping on tea as he hadn’t had the foresight to make anything gluten free. He was distracted, Lily and Kingsley were too and everyone around them knew it, not minding when they drifted in and out of the conversation. As nervous as he was, Remus knew this moment right here was his favourite, living his literal dream, surrounded by friends and family. That even gave him a sense of calm.

Until the presenters and judges emerged from the tent, all wearing welcoming smiles that revealed nothing. They stopped at the table draped in a pristine white cloth and topped with three beautiful flower bouquets and an engraved glass cake stand. There was no big cash prize in the bake-off, and Remus loved that. It made it all the more endearing to him, and it only allowed for the most passionate bakers to enter, the ones who baked for the love of it, not for money.

For once, James and Sirius were quiet, not needing to grab anyone's attention as the focus was already entirely on them. The three remaining bakers lined up before them as they had previously been instructed by the crew, and then the judges began speaking.

“This year, we had the most wonderful collection of bakers,” Dumbledore started, having to pause already as the applause had already commenced. “And our finalists even more so. I do believe this was the most difficult final we’ve had to judge in a long time, isn’t it Minerva?”

“It was,” McGonagall agreed, nodding. “We had a truly fine selection and the most beautiful array of cakes today. But in the end, there can only be one winner.”

Remus was certain everyone in attendance could hear his heartbeat. Lily’s hand was clammy in his own.

“It is with the greatest pleasure that I can announce that this year’s winner of The Great British Bake Off is…”

James and Sirius picked up a bouquet of flowers each, as did Dumbledore, McGonagall presenting the cake stand. Lily squeezed his hand, and Kingsley’s on the other side too he was sure.

“Remus Lupin.”

Remus blinked even as Lily threw herself on him in a bone-crushing hug, the judges approaching him to present him with his prize. Distantly he saw Sirius and James handing flowers to Kingsley and Lily, but he was in a daze. Dumbledore kissed him on the cheeks and McGonagall shook his hand with a knowing wink and suddenly Remus’ arms were heavy with flowers and expertly crafted glass.

Kingsley shook his hand, patting his shoulder in congratulations and James pulled him into a little side hug. Remus beamed at them, the crowd still cheering and clapping behind him as he reached forward and grabbed Sirius’ shirt, pulling him in for a kiss.

The crowd roared behind them and suddenly Remus realised where he was and what he was doing as he pulled away. “Shit, I’m sorry.” He said frantically. “I wasn’t thinking, I fucking shit- Christ- sorry!”

Sirius laughed and wrapped an arm around Remus’ waist. “I’m not. I love you, and I don’t care who knows. Now shut that filthy mouth of yours and kiss me, you absolute wanker.”

So Remus did.

The newspapers the next day had many headlines, but Remus’ personal favourite? ‘BRITISH BAKE OFF - STAR AND BAKER!’

THREE MONTHS LATER

The bakery was loud and busy and completely hectic and Remus loved every single second working there. Not a day went by that he wasn’t teased about his bake-off status and he was working on his degree here in London. Basically his life was everything he ever could have dreamed it would be.

“Remus, there’s someone here for you!” His co-worker, Katie, called from the front of the shop and Remus grinned, not even bothering to take off his apron as he wiped his hands against the fabric, opening the door with his shoulder, thanking Katie for the message even as his eyes scanned the shop floor.

Sirius.

Standing there in his leather jacket, his hands tucked into the pockets, motorcycle resting outside the door. “Hey,” He greeted, with a lazy smile. “You ready?”

“Yeah,” Remus nodded before freezing. “Wait no, I have to ice a few more pastries, they’re our best-seller.”

Sirius rolled his eyes laughing. “Oh,” He said, waving it off. “Let them eat cake.”

FIN.

#let them eat cake #LTEC #let them eat cake the final #wolfstar #remus lupin #sirius black #wolfstar bake off au #tgbbo #the great british bake off #lily evens #james potter #let them eat cake onlydreamofmysoul

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ktheist · 4 years ago

Text

2 | exclusives only.

final installment to the to my dear friend series.

prompt.“don’t confuse your party friends with your real friends.” (x)

muses. jungkook x reader

genre. university au. fwb. f2l.

words. 8.9k

first installment. friend in me.

warnings. implied smut, mentions of name calling

synopsis. the goody-two-shoes. the girl who always sits in one of the front rows in class. that girl that has literal models as friends while she comes to classes in sweats.

you identify with all of these.

but what you don’t ever want to be known as, is that freaky girl who had sex at a semi-public place, in the back room of the student lounge with the most drool-worthy man at the faculty.

and that’s exactly what kim namjoon, your ex-boyfriend, manifested when he publicly announced to everyone from your faculty of your oh-so-sweet time together, “come on, ___, everyone wants to know if you begged me to be your first and how we fucked in the back room of the student lounge.”

the moment jeon jungkook’s name which you have saved as koo, flashes across the screen - time stops. so does your heart as you meet taehyung’s eyes which were just fixed on your phone before you flip it over and press the stickers engraved case with the your hand as though afraid he might be able to see through the aluminum and read the text jungkook sent you.

which is just-

koo: heyy

“um, excuse me,” jisoo, having been more focused on the group you lowly pointed out to be stealing glances your way and unlike you, she’s in the middle of raising her hand with an index finger pointing upwards, deep maroon lips pursed in annoyance as the group begins to whisper amongst them and looking back at your table as though in disbelief that someone would actually call them out, “yes, you guys - especially the girl with the fake channel jacket - ever heard of minding your damn business?”

“jisoo,” you hiss, yanking her hand back down and slamming it against the table, “i don’t care, they can say whatever they-“

“at least have the decency to be original if you wanna shit talk someone,” lisa speaks over you, as though she can’t hear your protest.

“taehyung, stop them,” you lean over the table in a hushed whisper, catching the man’s blank gaze whilst he slurps on his smoothie as though he sees nothing wrong with the whole setting. and it’s definitely not the nasty bruise around his eyes that’s impairing his vision - nor judgement for that matter.

“what?” he chirps, willfully unaware of the tension in the air.

“oh god,” you finally slump into your seat, head lowered in an attempt to let your tresses fall over your face and cover it as you pretend to rub the temple of your head, hoping - wishing a hole would open and up and swallow you right here and now.

hurried footsteps of the group trying to pretend like they’re not in a rush pass behind you. words like, “rude much?”, “ugh, we don’t even care”, “attention whore.” among other things echoing in murmurs into the air before the tranquil blanket of silence settles back over the vicinity.

lisa’s glare of death takes on a much cheerful light as she grins at the older girl as they high five over the table.

“guys, thanks but you didn’t have to do that,” is the first thing you say after you lift your head, a half-hearted smile on your lips, “i don’t really care and quite honestly they have every right to be here as much as we do.”

“sweetie, the fact that you were laughing with us just a minute ago and stopped all of a sudden means you do care,” jisoo says pointedly, deep maroon lips pursed together in a ‘don’t lie to me’ manner and once she sees your lips clamping together and possibly said lie getting swallowed into your throat, she continues, “- and that’s completely valid. they should’ve know to keep their mouths shut if they wanna eat here too.”

“okay, maybe i do care but i can’t stop them from stealing glances or pointing me out to anyone who doesn’t know me or doesn’t know how i look which i’m sure is just meh,” before lisa could interject, you hold up a finger, “i know i can look pretty at times,” you offer an assuring smile before sighing at your next words, “but honestly, at this point, i can literally hear the ‘that’s the girl that tricked namjoon into dating her last year’ everywhere i go and i’m kind of used it.”

“but you didn’t trick him and he started it first,” taehyung doesn’t exactly slam the cup onto the table but he doesn’t gently set it down either and the sound is audible enough the little corner you’ve booked for yourselves.

“does it matter? that’s what word has it around here anyway,” shrugging, you take a spoonful of the vanilla ice cream into your mouth.

“it sucks,” jimin, ever the listener and the one person who’s never put his phone down until now, finally speaks the word of the day - not a particularly profound one but they fit the situation, “but i mean, this’ll all blow over in a month.”

almost as though they share the same wavelength, lisa and jisoo begin grumbling out protests

“ugh, jimin.” lisa narrows her eyes at him, face contorted in disgust while jisoo gasps, wide-eyed, “park jimin, i raised you better than this.”

“what?” the man in question - questions, crescent eyes turning into a pair of full moons, shining with utter confusion as he looks he repeats the same word over an over again with increasing remorse, “no- seriously, what did i say?”

“it’s easy for you,” jeongyeon chirps from next to you, perfect nude acrylics gleaming mutedly as she holds a fry she stole from his plate in the air, “you’re a guy,” and only then she pops the fry into her mouth.

“where did she come from?” a frown etches itself onto taehyung’s face as he stares at the newcomer as though she grew another head.

“unless jeongyeon has witchery powers then my best bet is through the door,” shrugging, you pick up the vapor dotted cup, the sound of ice clicking against each other as you twirl the straw around gets drowned by the series of agreement from the two girls.

“what does that even mean?” with hair mussed from and eyes almost as wide as a mad man in search for the truth - the only thing he’s missing is an overgrown unkept beard - jimin’s raised voice brings you back to the issue at hand, spurred by jeongyeon’s ominously vague prophecy.

“it means,” you set the cup down after sipping on the chocolatey goodness , “guys get worshipped like some sex god when their body counts get exposed and people will be lining up to get laid by him but when it’s a girl who gets her, for once, healthy sex life and keeps to one partner like me gets ‘exposed,’” hands raised, you curl your index and middle fingers inwards in an indicative nature, “let’s just say it doesn’t really help me climb up the social ladder.”

shrugging, you continue, “like yeah, maybe it’ll blow over like you said and our friends probably don’t care - they’re treating me the same but i can see our mutual friends becoming distant even though they don’t show but just this morning i went up to jennie kim was the to ask about the thing we have to do for a group project and i can kinda see it in her eyes. she sees me as that girl who begged kim namjoon to have sex with her, dumped him and got with the next cute guy of the century. and that impression of me is always gonna keep lurking in the back of everyone’s minds whether they do it consciously or not.”

a pause lapses in between you, not quite as profound as jimin’s jaw-drop is making it to be but maybe it is for him. the others continue to munch on their fries and jeongyeon just stole jimin’s drink, opened the cap and took a sip instead of using the straw, murmuring something about not taking any chances because ‘don’t know where his mouth’s been.’

it’s several heartbeats until jimin recovers from the load of information before he lets out an-

“oh.”

“yeah,” lisa nods, shooting him a ‘now you know’ look before turning to you with a pointed expression as though she’s ready to move on to a more pressing topic which was absurd because what else could be more pressing than your mid college term crisis-

“and you should say what you said just now to jungkook instead of ghosting him”

-except the fact that you thought you were subtle enough in flipping your phone’s screen upside down and pretending like you were listening to whatever whoever was speaking.

all of a sudden, the heat of five pairs of eyes are on you. but those who are truly stricken by the news are jimin and jeongyeon, the latter’s gaze being unavoidable because she’s sitting smack dab right next to you, “wait,” a tense pause wedges its way in the miniature space between you and her, “you’re ghosting jeon jungkook?”

“i-i just-“ there’s something in the way her tone rises at his name and the sheer absurdity of it all that makes your heart wrench in guilt and discomfort, “i’m not gonna ghost him for forever-“

“you should though.” taehyung waves a fry in your face before popping it into his mouth.

“-i just need time to like, process everything. i mean, it happened just yesterday,” by the end of your attempt to explain yourself, you can feel your shoulder line falling as you sigh, back leaned against the chair, the fries no longer looking appetizing.

“it’s partly his fault for flaunting out your sex lives to the entire world,” taehyung points out.

“shut it, tae,” jisoo hisses before turning to you, “take all the time you need, sweetie,” she rests her cheek on your shoulder as she side hugs you, probably finally comprehending the level of confusion and frustration all at once that forbids you from texting jungkook back the moment he texted you which was just minutes after the car disappears around the intersection and his figure disappear from sight last night.

the moment jeongyeon stepped through the crowd and stopped next to you with the clack of her boots and the sheer ‘oh honey, you’re not ready for that talk,’ nature, you decided right then and there, if jeongyeon asked you to shave off your hair and hand it over in a tray, you would in a heartbeat.

“since ____ didn’t wanna say anything, i figured she did get you to sleep with her but felt bad about it,” the hand she kept tucked under her arm falls away to reveal the hundred bucks she’s holding in your face.

by then, you had a hunch of what she was planning in that wonderful head of hers but the weight of the tens of pairs of eyes had made you wary. it was jeongyeon’s plan, all you had to do was just run with it, not run it.

wordlessly, you took the folded note, smoothed the cripple out of it as best as you could before folding it in two and tucking it into your bra. the bouts of gasps that broke out was what gave you the push to meet namjoon’s gaze with a blank one and shrug, “what? i went through all the trouble to get you to sleep with me and put up with dating you for six months - i should at least get my pay,” murmurs echo through out the room as well as several ‘ooh’s at the revelation.

the man’s face had turned several shades darker. eyes trained on you like you were all he sees. like a predator to his prey. once upon a time, you might have found the way he was so rapt with something heartfluttering - attractive even as you sat at the bleachers, cheering on your secret boyfriend whilst he instructed his team through the mic. circuit breaker had never came out anything but victorious when kim namjoon was that focused.

if only looks could kill, you’d be dead.

“that’s right, it was just a bet we made in first year,” jeongyeon’s tilted crimson smirk had been tucked with something like wicked humor as her shoulder line jolted with her laughter.

first year, you were that lost kid who bent over backwards to be everyone’s friends and ended with none. namjoon knew that, like how he knew this was all a lie and yet perhaps that was why you could almost picture the brood of clouds looming over his head. the same look that would settle over his face as he shifted through courses of action to take for that one possible outcome that lead to circuit breaker’s victory.

your heartbeat stuttered when he began to stand straighter, arms crossed over muscled chest. his naturally tall stature had allowed him to look down on you like gum under his shoe, “quite pathetic that she had to beg to win a bet.”

the ground opening up and swallowing you whole right then and there had remained but a wishful thinking. the seconds seemed to stretch on for hours on end with gazes burning right through your skull. you could almost hear the ghostly whispers of “oh my god,” “who does she think she is?” “what a slut.”

“wasn’t that like a year ago?” somewhere from your other side, a snicker hit the air like a mockery and a hand wrapped around your waist, pulling you into a familiar scent of lemongrass and musk. how your own arm went around his to side hug his waist had been a surprise to you too, the action was as natural as breathing.

“i mean,” jungkook drawled with a shrug, “kinda sad that you’re still hung up over a girl but i get it - i know how amazing ____ is,” with a slight lean towards the older man, the low murmur couldn’t have been any louder, “we did it on the side of the street once,” a gasp from the ever loyal audience, “the balcony,” another gasp, “under a bridge,” there isn’t any more gasps - the audience must have ran out of responses, “in the changing room,” just when you thought he was going to spell out every single spot you had sex at on the list, jungkook finally laughed, “honestly any place you can think of - but yeah, keep dreaming about the back room of the student lounge cause that’s probably the most adventurous a dude like you would ever be.”

the shock painted over jimin’s jaw drop, jisoo’s eyes glancing from left to right, jeongyeon’s pursed lips and muted whistle didn’t exactly go past you. but you were more focused on the way the man in front of you, the one you thought you gave everything to, was the one speechless between the two of you.

the smile you wore was a lazy one but the words you threw back at him didn’t bloom in your chest with satisfaction of retribution the way you thought they would, “get over it, namjoon.”

in hindsight, you should’ve known it would come back and bite your ass. but you didn’t think the reaction would be this immediate. by monday morning, you were already getting strange looks and one not-so-pleasant experience of hearing snide laughter as you passed a group of students with the faintest but clearest, “what a whore.”

by noon, your reputation was pretty much set in stones - though your closest friend circle tried to convince you that it wasn’t as bad as it seems. that was, until another group of students walked into the cafe and most of them kept glancing at you like you’re some wild animal in a zoo.

“oh!” you could almost see a light bulb going off on jeongyeon’s head - as though a thought just crossed her, “i forgot what i came here for but anyway, i got tea!”

“girl,” lisa raises her brows with an obvious ‘what-are-you-waiting-for’ smile, “spill.”

and from the way way everyone else is quiet but focused on the woman, including you, it’s safe to say lisa’s words spoke for all of you. knowing that she holds the sole attention of the people at the table, jeongyeon smirks playfully, “guess what?”

“what?” taehyung says plainly.

“you’re supposed to guess, idiot,” she rolls her eyes but recovers from the brunette’s lack of effort as she basically bounces in her seat like a ball of excitement, “kim namjoon got kicked out of circuit breaker! the dean himself had a ‘little word’ with him. just. now.”

it would have come off as a pleasant news - cheer-worthy even. if not for one simple fact: that the dean is none other than jimin’s mother.

“oh my fucking god, yes!” lisa yelps, while jisoo extends her arms across the aforementioned woman to reach for the giggling man on her other side, “come here, let me hug you park jimin!” since it’s a round table, it makes the notion of hugs more plausible but since lisa is sitting between them, she ends up sandwiched with jisoo’s arms around her and jimin leaning into her in order to let the rest of jisoo’s arms encase around his neck.

“to be fair, he got kicked out because he and tae got in a fight,” the bleach blond man chuckles, “so tae’s punishment is being professor yoon’s unpaid assistant.” the position doesn’t seem ideal but the three doesn’t seem to mind - they look like they enjoy it.

“it was worth it,” taehyung shrugs when he catches your eyes, knowing full well the wave of guilt that rushes through you so instead, you mouth him a ‘i owe you one.’

by the time lunch ends (for you and jimin at least since the others seem to have another free hour before their classes start), you find yourself taking up jimin’s offer to sit with him at the back instead of the fifth row from the front that was just perfect for a not-so-serious-but-not-so-laxed-student vibe.

“hey, jimin - thanks,” you say in between the class filling up and him texting someone on his phone which he puts down on the table after your words of gratitude fill the air, “for talking to your mom for me.”

“that’s the least i can do,” he fixes you with a half-hearted smile - probably wishing he’d be able to throw a punch where it was needed but you know park jimin wouldn’t be park jimin if he wasn’t this adorable, good natured person with the kindest heart that could barely hurt a fly let alone a person. even if that person is a douchebag like namjoon, “‘sides, mom’s always preaching about equality for both genders and kim basically sexually harassed you, i’m sorry i couldn’t stand up for you like tae-“

“no, don’t say that,” you frown, hands tugging on his biceps. slipping your around the aforementioned biceps, you rest your head on his shoulder, feeling the rising tension of your pursed lips, “everyone has their own friendship language - and finding a peaceful way to get back to someone who hurt your friend, is yours. so thank you for being you,” you pause just for the briefest moment when you accidentally meet the eyes of one of your friends - the flash in their eyes projecting their not-so-friendly thoughts at the sight of you, “thanks for being my friend, jimin.”

something soft bumps the top of your head as you feel his neck crane briefly, “thanks for being my friend too- jisoo would beat your ass for saying this though.”

at the mention of the spirited friend of yours, you both break out into fits of giggles. “jisoo would probably buy chicken tie my to a chair while dangling a drumstick until i promise to stop saying ‘weird things.’”

by ‘weird things’ it meant thanking them or even projecting any form of gratitude which shouldn’t even be a thing to be grateful for because, as she would aggressively yet lovingly insist, and as jimin acts out, “she’d probably be ‘it’s obvious we’d be friends because you’re the baddest bitch - girl, you’re that bitch.’”

it’s even funnier when he tries to mimic her way of speech and tone. for a moment, as you continue to narrate what your two other best friends would have done in the setting, both of you laughing into each other’s faces, the watchful eyes don’t seem all that intimidating.

throughout the evening, you spend it with your friends. watching movies and sleeping over at jimin’s - since he’s the only one who owns an apartment and doesn’t have a cranky roommate, going to class with yesterday’s jeans and jimin’s stolen hoodies to which he looked slightly perturbed at the realization that that’s three hoodies he probably wouldn’t get back even though you promised to wash it and give it back. but he the matter seems to fly out the window once you stopped by mcdonald’s for breakfast.

you may or may not have neglected pending projects group work but your friends didn’t seem to care -jisoo and jimin were rushing to group meetings this morning but after lisa’s five minute therapy-esque session for you to stop apologizing for inconveniencing them when you thought they must have (they did) pushed back on a lot of plans just to spend time with you and make sure you’re okay, you’d finally turned the ‘sorry’s to ‘thank you’s.

it was some time when you were walking to a class you shared with taehyung, that his looming frame easily catches what exactly you’re doing on your phone and begrudgingly points out, “ugh, you’re still texting him? after promising you’ll choose yourself first?”

to be fair, it was a short and sweet text saying ‘hey, i’m fine. sorry i didn’t reply to your texts, just have a lot going on atm’ without any emojis but also no period at the end because you didn’t want to seem like you’re mad. but besides that, you’re not entirely sure what exactly you feel for jungkook because like taehyung said-

“he‘s a different kind of asshole,” his tone was light but if there’s anything a whole year of knowing kim taehyung did, it was catching onto the way his voice strains and his avoidance to look at you as he speaks, “does he even know what he did to you? what you’re going through right now?”

it was true that the after effect of jungkook listing out the places you both had sex at has finally come to bite you in the ass. but-

“nobody would’ve thought the things jungkook said would backfire like this,” and yet you tug on the sleeves of jimin’s hoodie, voice small.

the man’s abrupt stop forces you to stop too, leaving you no choice but to meet his frowning face, “everyone knows what stuff like that’ll do more to girls than guys.”

it’s the pause that you took. the hesitance that taehyung must’ve seen shining brighter than your reputation allows it.

“you know what- do whatever you want,” and with that he leaves you on the side of the corridor to stare at his broad back as he walks away.

there’s no way you’ll go up and sit with him at the back like you did with jimin. but it wasn’t the empty spots next to you that made your heart clench - it was the way he deliberately turned away from you when your eyes met as you entered and he took a seat.

it’s some time after the professor left the class, whilst your phone vibrates rapidly with onslaught of messages, do you finally pick it up with one goal in mind.

koo: oh okay

koo: hope you’re doing okay

koo: i’m here if you wanna talk

he hasn’t finished typing when you tap out a simple ‘sorry’ and switching to-

you: thank you really but i think it’s better if we don’t text anymore

only to see another blue bubble pop on the screen at the same time as yours.

koo: i miss you

by the end of the very, very, very long day, you’re finally able to throw yourself onto your soft plush bedsheets. your friends don’t know that taehyung’s mad at you and isn’t talking to you - his sporadic off-days being the reason for them to assume that this is one of those days.

and they didn’t really push you to talk either, choosing to give you space after they robbed you off yours by kidnapping you to have a best friend’s night last night.

much to your dismay, not even five minutes into melting into the comforts of your bed, your stomach starts growling like a wild animal that hasn’t been fed in weeks. despite distantly remembering finishing the last pack of ramen last week, you still drag your feet to the kitchen in search for a instant noodles that, after opening the cupboard, you confirm, isn’t there.

and that’s how you end up trudging down the streets with flip flops and hair poking underneath the hood of jimin’s hoodie. a surge of gratification shoots through your veins when you see the last cup of your favorite spicy ramen on the shelf. not bothering to go back, you take a seat at one of the high stools facing the wall-sized window after paying for it.

it takes a few texts and scrolling through instagram before the ramen is ready. but it’s jeongyeon’s panic-induced tone that takes up most of your time.

jeongyeon: ok so ik you’re gonna be mad at me but pls don’t be

you: what issit tho

jeongyeon: you gotta promise 🤙

with a growl of your stomach demanding to be fed, you place your phone down with a misspelled loophole ‘yea i pro mizz 🤙🤙🤙’

and if getting a certification as your faculty’s resident hoe isn’t enough, in that moment, with ramen dangling from your mouth and puffed cheek, your eyes stops on a brunette boy who stops dead in his track when he sees you.

somewhere on the smooth surface of the table, your phone vibrates with a pop up notification.

jeongyeon: ok so jeon jungkook texted me about you and i kinda told him he should ask you himself but then i thought it kinda indicated that something’s wrong

another ping.

jeongyeon: i didn’t tell him anything else tho!!!

“i don’t know what to say - i’m sorry, didn’t think it would be this bad,” jungkook confesses, head hung low, hair hiding most of his face and disallowing you from reading his emotions.

after jeongyeon ominously told jungkook to ask you about why she can’t tell him anything about how you’re doing now, jungkook had rushed to your place because it was obvious that his texts would be left on read, “maybe i should’ve taken it for what it is but i-,” he’d stopped short of what he wanted to say before he’d met your gaze with wishing stars in his eyes, “i just needed to see you and make sure you’re okay.”

“it’s not,” you admit, “most of the time they just look at me like i’m some animal in the zoo but sometimes it still gets to me.”

“you didn’t seem like the person who would care,” he says smally, almost as though it wasn’t meant for you but for himself.

you want to laugh, “that’s cause that’s what half-drunk me is most of the time and you’ve only ever known her - but on campus, i’m that girl who walks in the hallway with her head down and wanna be as invisible as i can... because i hate conflicts and being seen means i’ll most likely get into some shit... like i did with namjoon.”

kim namjoon saw you when no one else paid attention. mostly because the outstanding ones in your batch were taking the spotlight in freshmen year. the positions became apparent a little over two weeks after the first class. and you were still wondering around, in search for like minded beings. instead of finding friends, you found a god.

or so what they call a once in a lifetime genius.

“yea- i don’t really know you,” if it isn’t for the way his head snaps your way and the heartbreaking strain in his voice, you would have had a better time holding out, “i don’t even know what your favorite color is but i promise i’ll never hurt you like he did,” when he meets your gaze, all control seem to seep out of you and all you want is to take everything back

“i’m sorry- i just- it’s stupid, cutting you off just ’cause of that-“ the sound chains of the swing echo into the chilly night air as you prop your elbows on your knee, torso bent forward while you cup your face with your hands, maybe if you rubbed hard enough the stupid will come off, “i know it’s nobody’s fault but then there’s tae and he was the only one who thought i should stop talking to you- but he’s also the most reasonable person in our friend group and i-“ you almost choke on pure air, “i’m sorry.”

and so you end up at a park a few blocks away, you choosing to sit on the swing whilst he leans against the monkey bar a few feet away.

“it’s not okay,” jungkook’s voice fills your ears - he doesn’t sound as mad as you thought he’d be but his words say otherwise.

until you hear the scrape of soles on dirt. and just as you thought he was leaving, a hand lands on your knee, “but i forgive you.”

the smile you see when you peek through your fingers is familiar. boyish like its owner but endearing all the same,“and nothing that makes you feel like your peace is disturbed, is stupid,” but then the smile down turns into a frown, eyebrows knitting together, “i just wish you told me so you didn’t have to go through this alone.”

“i wasn’t alone - i had my friends,” it’s right after the words hit the air and a flash of disappointment crosses jungkook’s eyes, do you belatedly realize that you were indirectly calling him a non-friend.

“right,” the smile he fixes you breaks your heart - even more so when you see how he’s struggling to be happy for you whilst pushing down the hurt in his eyes, “that’s great - it’s great that you weren’t alone.”

or someone outside of your exclusives-only circle. well, he was - he isn’t exactly someone you’d befriend like you would your current friends. but it must have sounded like he was demoted to a friend who you say hi’s to and don’t share personal hardships and happiness with.

“yeah,” you echo in agreement before biting your bottom lip, gaze switching from his hand to his arm and finally his deep brown eyes that appear hazel underneath the light of the lamppost, “can we still be friends?”

the short but straightforward, “no” on jungkook’s part echoes in the air.

it takes a moment for you to register the two-letter word, as if it’s the hardest to fathom and before you know it, your jaw is on the ground, after a surprised, “what-”

in all honesty, you were the one who wanted to cut jungkook off from your life - for an absurd reason at that - but still, with how he patiently listened to you and even forgave you, you thought he’d at least want to stay friends. maybe he doesn’t want to be that kind of friend anymore. or maybe he doesn’t want to be your friend if you’re not that kind of friends anymore. maybe-

“i don’t wanna be just friends,” the confession falls out from his lips when you least expect it. almost as though you weren’t the only one who could read the other like an open book.

but despite his confidence the first time, you still see the traces of hesitance in the way he takes a moment longer to continue, “i... i want to know you- not the drunk you, not the campus you, but you you.”

this time, you can’t control the trickle of laughter that tumbles out of your mouth. it’s dry and a little bit broken, but still comes from a humorous place, “you’re probably gonna be disappointed as hell.”

“is that a yes?” the flash of starlight in jungkook’s eyesmile causes your heart to swell with a sort of fullness. the chains clink into the air as he grips it with his hands, using them to hoist himself up - but he doesn’t stand straight. instead,he leans his forehead on yours, “say yes.”

the smile that slips on your face is involuntary. completely out of your control as you affirm, “it’s a yes.”

“so is that tae’s hoodie?” jungkook asks as you walk down the street to your apartment.

the “what?” that slips out of your mouth is more surprised than anything else but it seems like that’s what made the man rush out his explanation - which he didn’t really need to but you appreciate it anyway.

“it’s just- you’re not a hoodie girl,” you don’t miss the way he scrunches his nose as he struggles to find the proper words, you think it’s cute - you think jungkook’s cute, “you’re more like a sweaters girl - or like, that’s what i see you wear in the morning before you kick me out.”

chuckling, you relieve him of his curiosity with a “no, it’s not tae’s.”

he beams at you like a morning sun until you add, “it’s jimin’s.”

“o-oh,” he nods but doesn’t press on.

“he’s also one of my best friend - they dragged me to movie’s night and we crashed at jimin’s last night,” you say.

“oh.” the pearly whites peek from underneath his lips again, eyes lighting up like stars.

but then, before you know it, you’re standing at the entrance of your apartment.

“thanks for walking me home,” on your part, you don’t really want to part.

“yeah, no problem,” if you didn’t know any better, jungkook’s foot scuffling against the dirt doesn’t really give off a willing farewell vibe either.

until you both blurt out at the same time-

“do you wanna come in?”

“i mean it when i said i missed you.”

an echoing silence settles between you for the longest moment - or in fact, just a second too long but with all that’s happened and the friendships you can see breaking, jeon jungkook’s is one you’re not going to let go that easily.

not again.

“come inside,” you say.

and this time, you’re not asking.

jungkook’s breath is hot against your neck as you groan from the impact of your back and head hitting the door as soon as it closes, his hands under your thighs.

but you’re fast to recover, hands snaking up his chest until they reach his strained jawline, tilting his head and forcing him to look at you, “show me how much you missed me.”

a familiar glint flashes across his eyes at your challenge before his gaze falls to the borrowed deep blue hoodie you have on, “take that off. now.”

deciding against taunting him some more, you pull the piece of clothing over your head before dropping it next to the can of beer, snacks and energy bars you bought from the convenience store.

it doesn’t take much for you to lean into him enough not to let yourself topple over backwards - maybe it’s the hundreds of times he’s carried you like this, maybe he’s the only person you trust to grab you by the bottom of your ass and you’d instantly know where to wrap your legs around.

or maybe, just maybe, you missed jungkook too.

but either way, you kiss him once after he slams you against your bed. you kiss him a few more times as he slides in and out of you like every crevice of your core is made for him. you’re in the middle of kissing him when he hits ghat sweet spot that gets you moaning mid-kiss. he doesn’t seem to mind as he bites your bottom lips, letting you ride your high whilst he dedicates himself to you. to your pleasure.

and you kiss him when he thrusts deep into you as you both reach a different kind of euphoria together, holding each other tightly as if the other would fade if you didn’t.

since your bed is a single bed and you were occupying most of it, you have to scoot to make space for an extra person. you let him have the pillow while you keep your head raised midair until he slips his arm under it, his other hand pulling your back against his front before he pulls the cover over you.

the digits in the corner of your phone tells you that you’re probably going to end up rushing to your 8 am tomorrow but at the moment, with the moonlight pouring through the window and a distant sound of cars in the main street filling the room, there’s nowhere you’d rather be than right here.

“it’s orange - my favorite color is orange, like the sunset,” you’re pretty sure your voice is half-slurred from the fatigue of the day creeping up to you, but jungkook surprisingly heard it right because-

“we should go sunset watching someday,” he suggests.

“mhm,” you hum, not opposed of that idea at all, “what’s your...” you drag out, shifting through words until you find the one you’re most curious about, “favorite dessert?”

“besides you?” he chuckles when you let out an involuntary gasp at his insinuation before humming in contemplation, “ice creams.”

“are you free this sunday?” you ask.

“yeah, why?” his voice is laced with a hint of wonder.

“let’s go to an ice cream parlor,” by now, you’re pretty sure he barely understands what you’re saying as your eyes begin to droop, “let’s do things people do outside of parties - i wanna get to know you, koo.”

for the longest moment, you thought it’s him that’s fallen asleep because of the lack of affirmation.

that is, until he murmurs with the smallest voice, “yeah, i’d like that.”

you wake up to the sound of your daily alarm blaring across the room. but much to your dismay, when you slip your hand under the pillow - which unnaturally becomes a texture of spiky but fluffy treads - you come to a morbid realization that isn’t there.

which means wherever your gosh darn phone is, you’re going to have to find it to hit the snooze button because you can’t sleep with that deafening noise but if you do get up, you won’t be able to fall back asleep.

that is, until a different kind of sound, one that knows your name, grumble out a, “___, turn that shit off,” while a hand band around your waist, pulling you into a whole body.

for the briefest moment, you forget about the sound, heart skipping a dangerous beat as your mind shift through your memories, searching for something you can use for a self defense before it finally settles down with a realization that the only other person who could be complaining about your alarm because they were in bed with you, is jeon jungkook.

“god damn it,” you grumble with eyes barely open and mind half-awake while you pick up each article of clothing that are strewn across the room, “where did you throw my phone, jungkook?”

the man in your bed slurs out some incomprehensible words, leaving you with nothing but your wits and your wills and a little bit of urgency because your roommate may not be home most of the time but she definitely is in the morning. her schedule is more unpredictable than yours.

after a good one minute, you finally found your phone not on the floor but under the sheets right next to jungkook’s thigh. considering you spent a good chunk of your remaining sleepiness looking for it, you’re now out of the sleep essence and wide awake.

it looks like you caused quite a stir. jeongyeon’s text alone amounts to 36 notifs while each of your friend private messaged you an average of 5-12 texts each. the lowest being jimin and lisa who teetered on the line of ‘hey jeongyeon told me’s and ‘text me when you see this’ while jisoo’s are full out capsing and taehyung is a mixture of jimin and lisa with a missed call.

but what you don’t expect to see among the pile of notification, is the one pushed to the bottom by your friends’.

“oh, wow, kim namjoon texted me,” you blurt out, not knowing that a slip of tongue would cause a burst of reaction from the sleeping male in your bed.

shooting up with the sheets still covering his head, he yanks them down and fixes you with a wide-eyed, disbelieving gaze, “kim namjoon what now?”

it takes you a moment to digest the fact that he couldn’t even form a proper sentence or even grope around on the bed to help you look for your phone yet a single name and a verb could literally shock the sleep out of him. but you’re not one to hold onto grudges so you casually say, “he texted me.”

when you don’t offer anything else, the man finally asks, “well... what did he say?”

“’hey,’“ you echo the one worded text before slinging your towel over your shoulder.

“and?” hurried steps follow you into the hallway, an awkward ‘don’t-look-pressed’ laugh accompanying them, “...what did you say?”

“why?” you turn around abruptly, almost causing your follower to run right into you before he quickly halts himself, eyes slanting to the wall as he scratches his unclothed chest.

“i- uh, i don’t know - just curious i guess,” he mumbles out.

at that, the chuckles you’ve been holding back spills out of your mouth like waterfall. he opens his arms for you when you slip yours around his waist, locking your hands on his back, “i didn’t reply but if i did, it’s probably to tell him to stop texting me.”

the heartwarming ‘oh’ that tumbles out of his mouth is followed by a tuck in the corners of his lips, doe eyes filling with a sort of heat that makes your heart skip a beat.

that is, until fear flashes across his face, “wait, what time is it? don’t you have 8 am’s on tuesdays? i should leave-”

“nah,” you shake your head, a smile making home on your lips, “i’m skipping. you wanna get breakfast at mcdonald’s?”

instead of an affirmation, jungkook’s panicked face turns to a frown, hands coming to cup your cheeks as he twists it from left to right, as though looking for something and you know why-

“who are you and what have you done to sober ___?” he demands.

laughter trickles out of your mouth as you struggle to get out of his grasp while he demands you return you back, “___ would drag my ass to the door at ass crack o’clock when she has 8 am’s. bring her back!”

but in your fit of giggles and his exorcist-esque shouting, jungkook stops and pecks you on your mouth, “just kidding,” you don’t think you can ever get used to that boyish smile of his, “i would love to have our first sober date at mcdonald’s.”

as if a giggle switch has been switched on, you laugh some more, cheeks hurting and tears pooling in the corner of your eyes at the way he makes it sound like you’re asking him to a date.

and you’re not quite against that idea.

so you find yourself at the mcdonald’s five minutes away from your campus. if you have any fucks at all to give, you would be worried about meeting your casual friends. but something about jeon jungkook and your friends’ - your real friends - endless support from yesterday has turned you into a woman of steel. or, really, just mixed party-you and sober-you together.

“apparently he wants to get back together because he thinks it’ll help fix everything but i know he just wants to save his ass - oh, did you know the dean, jimin’s mom, kicked him out of circuit breaker?” you casually say before chugging on your coffee before the sound of someone choking a whole lung drums in your ears.

turning to you with flushed cheeks and post-lung cough, jungkook demands, “you can’t just dump things like this on me- you gotta give me a warning first.”

“i did,” you counter, and just as his face spells ‘when?’ you quickly add, “at home - when i said kim namjoon texted me.”

“babe, that was 30 minutes ago,” jungkook says, in a matter-of-factly.

but all you hear is the name he calls you, “i kinda like that.”

he smiles shyly but still say, “what? babe?”

“yes,” you place your phone on the table, forgetting the open text as you lean closer to jungkook before enunciating the word “babe?”

his hand finds its way to your chin while yours slip underneath his shirt as he guides your face to his lips. but just before you’re about to kiss, the sound of voices - familiar ones at that - pour into the otherwise quiet vicinity. drawn by your curiosity, you tilt your head just the slightest bit to peak at the newcomers when you feel the heat of pairs of eyes burn into your head.

“shit,” you blurt out.

“oh my god,” jisoo gasps while lisa lets out a muted whistle, murmuring a “whew, chile, the audacity of some men.”

jeongyeon snickers as she leans away from lisa who’s holding your phone with namjoon’s text open, “i know what’s going on,” she waves a hand gun at you, “you’re doing great now and he’s sad and lonely-”

“or he wants to show the dean you guys made up so he can get into circuit breaker again,” taehyung chimes in, leaning against the chair, volunteering to pick up everyone’s order from the counter, “you know, just a thought.”

“no, no, no,” lisa interjects, “it’s more than just that with these men - he wants you to think that he’s the only one that can... ‘save’ you.”

“from what?” jimin asks, innocent round eyes looking around until jisoo sighs.

“god, jimin, it’s obvious,” she fixes him a pointed look, “___’s being labelled a manipulating bitch,” she turns to you and winks, “which you aren’t, manipulating - mean but a bitch? yes, and the baddest,” and then she shifts her attention to jimin, “and he’s saying if she gets back with him, he’ll ‘clear things up’ because apparently people tend to take men’s words more seriously than women and he knows that.”

“word,” lisa shakes her head.

“but ___’s not gonna get with namjoon because she has a jungkook,” jeongyeon’s proclamation isn’t entirely baseless yet the way all eyes turns to you tells you that it’s not exactly an established fact - especially when everyone at the table knows that you were ghosting jungkook just yesterday.

“i mean,” jungkook begins from next to you, fidgeting in his seat but avoiding your gaze when you turn to him, “___ can do whatever she wants.”

a pregnant silence lapses between you as you feel your friends exchanging dubious looks with each other. taehyung’s disapproving frown is the hardest to miss because it must have come across as jungkook not being serious enough with you.

but knowing the aforementioned man and how he never assumes your needs and wants - unless you’re having sex because he knows exactly how you like it - you know he doesn’t want to pressure you to be with him.

“i’m not getting with namjoon,” you announce for yourself, shooting the him a smile just before taehyung leaves to get your food.

“i’ll go help tae,” and with that, you skip over to the taller man, catching onto jisoo’s interrogative “so, are you guys like, exclusive now?”

“hey,” you greet the man that’s about to lift the tray of cheeseburgers, drinks, apple pies and mcflurries.

he echoes your greeting with a passive one and you both walk to the chili counter in silence. when he sets the tray down, you’re already picking up one of the tiny paper cups, “so, jungkook came and check up on me yesterday and stayed over to make sure i’m okay.”

he doesn’t need to know you had sex in between.

“he’s a really good guy - and he only said what he said just now cause he doesn’t want me to feel pressured to choose between being with him, or with namjoon or just being single,” you add when it doesn’t seem like he doesn’t have anything to say.

“i’m sorry for acting like a dick yesterday,” he finally breaks his silence with a one breathed sentence, his hand picking up the chili sauce filled cup off your hands.

and that’s when you see your opening, “it’s fine,” you quickly accept but stand your ground, “but jeongyeon also said something about a bet but you didn’t criticize her- i’m not trying to point out who did what worse but it looks like you’re more critical of jungkook because you don’t personally know him.”

“i thought i know a fuck boy when i see one,” he grunts like a sulking child.

“honestly, what does fuck boy even mean?” shrugging, you raised your brows at his okay-get-to-the-point look, “jimin’s kind of a fuck boy if you think about it but we love anyway.”

when he doesn’t seem to deny your allegations, you continue, “and if jungkook’s a fuck boy, then i’m a fuck girl because i-“

“uh,” he recoils like a teen getting sat down for the birds and bees talk,“okay, okay. i get it - spare me the details.”

rolling your eyes at his dramatic reaction, you end with a “see, name calling doesn’t make sense, not to mention hurtful to the person being called that name. they’re a a human being with feelings.”

it’s the ‘i know’ at the end that got him. even though he hadn’t seen you being taunted and ridiculed that day, didn’t mean it stopped. you were just good at masking it because you knew better. knew that you had friends that would stand by you all the way - heck, jisoo even made a scene out of people looking at you the day before.

“i’ll try to not be so judgy,” taehyung announces before scrunching up his face, “but is him hanging out with us gonna be a permanent thing?”

“thank you for trying,” you fix him a proud smile as he picks up the tray to head to where the others are, “and he’s my friend too so yes, it’s going to be a permanent thing.”

“... say ‘cactus jack sent me’?” jeongyeon is in the middle of putting jimin up to walking over to the counter and saying the infamous line to the worker when you slip back into your seat.

“and travis scott’s burger,” and apparently lisa too.

jimin’s eyes disappear behind his lids as he chuckles at their attempts but he doesn’t exactly oppose the idea.

“hey,” jungkook’s eyes lights up when he sees you.

“so how was the interrogation session my girl friends?” you can’t help the devious grin that slips onto your face at the admittance that you may or may have not purposely left jungkook with your friends for the ice breaking slash interrogating session whilst you patch up your own friendship with your other friend.

“not bad,” he shrugs, “they even showed me your sleeping pics to scare me off but they forgot i wake up to that face almost every few days a week.”

at that revelation, your jaw drops to the ground, mind recalling the many times your open-mouth sleeping pictures have been sent into the group chat as a meme and it was not pretty.

“they did not,” your cheeks heat up as you make a mental note to gather everyone up and force them to finally delete that picture.

“don’t worry you’re not getting rid of me that easily babe,” unaware of the extent of the war raging inside you, he pecks your forehead and continues eating his fries.

“do i really look like that when i sleep?” you finally ask after clicking on the safety belt.

even though you could have rode with your friend in jimin’s car, jungkook insists to send you to class as a proper mark for the end of your first date.

“mhm,” jungkook hums casually as he turns on the car.

“and you still like me?” you’re not sure what kind of face you’re making but it has to be something between disgust and bewilderment because damn, he’s a real one.

“what?” he says between chuckles - as if he doesn’t see anything wrong with the picture and it makes your heart bloom with a sort of endearment while your core heats up with a sort of want.

throwing him a sly smile, you cock your head to the side, “get in the back.”

with a mixture of surprised and impressed blink, he doesn’t need to be told twice to unbuckle his seat and climb over to the back seat. long legs spread out to welcome you into his lap.

taglist: @gukksluv @illwritetomorrow

shout out to my biggest bestest friend in me-loving baddest b @koochiekoo !!! highkey without you, i probably would take longer to finish but you’ve been super supportive and i love you so this fic is for you neinya!!!

note. the first part (friend in me) wasn’t showing up on searches no matter how many times i posted it and my earliest readers would remember it being called ‘to my dear friend’ before i changed it to fim bc i wanted to see if it’ll show up on searches but it didn’t. idk if this one will but i dont have much hope bc the preview also didn’t show up on searches (weird) but i have lost the rest of the f’s i have and decided to post this with a mindset that it’ll reach the right people though probably be less than 50 ppl. but i hope those who came this far enjoyed the fic!

#bts scenarios #jungkook scenarios #bts fanfic #jungkook fanfic #jungkook smut #bts smut #jungkook fic #bts fic #jungkook fanfiction #bts fanfiction #jungkook imagines #bts imagines #bts x you #bts x reader #jungkook x reader #fic: friend in me #fic: to my dear friend

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lightspeed-lightspeed-lightspeed · 3 years ago

Text

How did it happen?

(Bucky barnes x Female reader)

A/n: (Tw: cat. If you don't like cats gtfo of here) Although it is narrated in third person, the narration gravitates more around Bucky's pov (sorta). This is gonna be quite lousy so have fun, I guess.. If you can.

"How did this happen?" he whisper-sighed. "How? When?" He asked himself as he was staring into the distance, absent-mindedly stroking the white ball of fur curled up on his lap. Alpine let out a soft meow as if answering his soliloquies.

But for real though, how did he fall for you? The last he checked, you both were calling each other names out of contempt. Y/n y/l/n was simply insufferable, he always thought. Where did your acts of annoyance start blooming into everything he now yearns for?

As much as he would like to hide behind the idea that these sudden, irrational feelings hold no reason and meaning- how could he? How could he hide from what he knows? from what he realized? He could lie to himself all he wants- Hell, he had been lying to himself all this time, ignoring the wisps of light that marked the warnings through the pavements of this path he was sauntering down. He was walking into love and he refused to know it.

He wondered how different things would be now if he hadn't screwed up in your last mission and got you demoted to the archive library duty. Of course, jeopardizing a high stakes mission by starting a quarrel during field action is a grave mistake, but still Fury was being a little too extreme by suspending Y/n off the field for a month. Bucky didn't really believe that any of it was his fault, according to him it was you who were being your impossible self on the field that day. But he did feel sort of bad for you now. Maybe what Bucky shouldn't have done, was to try and make it up to you by spending time with you in that desolate library. Truth be told, it was partly an excuse for wanting to be around you.

There he was again, his thoughts lingering around you. Recounting the events of day before yesterday.

( The day before yesterday )

"Did you find it?," Bucky's voice echoed through the aisles as he walked towards the base of the ladder you were perched on looking for an old file Bucky needed for his mission. "Not just yet," you mused.

The archives library was completely empty except for the two of you. The sound of his boots against the spotless vinyl flooring filled the room as he was pacing back and forth. Clack-tap, Clack-tap, Clack-tap, Clack-tap. He found the rhythm weirdly gratifying. And he could see you didn't. If something could get you to lose your cool, what's not to love?

"Quit pacing," you sighed, slightly annoyed. He started to stomp on even louder. Clack-tap, Clack-TAP, CLACK-TAP,CLACK-TAP,CLACK-TAP. Your breathing quivered with exasperation, as your shoulders hunched and fell in gliding motions. Just as gratifying, he thought looking at it.

"Quit pacing, Goddamnit!" You practically growled.

"No." He said, scrunching up a smile fighting it's way on his face. "What are you? obsessed? Mind your business," he shot smugly.

"You're making it really hard for me to, you moron," You muttered as he broke out into a grin. Annoying you practically counted as top-tier entertainment for him.

"C'mon man, do something," You cried.

"Do what?"

"Search for those godforsaken files, maybe. I honestly-"

"I am searching,"

"No, you're not." You huffed.

"I am, and I'm beginning to think the files are not in he-"

"Shhh" you cut him off. He shot you a questioning look.

"Don't you hear it?" you whisper-hissed.

"Hear what?" he asked as he reached for his weapons, falling into a defensive posture.

"There's somebody else in he-" before you could complete the sentence, you were screaming and everything was collapsing as you fell off the ladder yanking the racks down along with you, a daunting cacophony of heavy crashes and clamours deafening as you and Bucky were whipped by gravity, with absolutely no idea what is happening for a solid couple of moments.

"What the fuck just happened?" Bucky asked as he looked around, his pale blue eyes wide and gleaming with absolute confusion. The racks were all fallen, everything loosely covered with the papers lying around. The room had become a little darker. "I- um.." You started, "I... It was a cat.." you said frantically as you were still trying to shake yourself from the shock. "It was a what?" he asked incredulously. "A cat! I mean, It sort of jumped at my face, and I.. It sneaked up behind the rack... and I jumped and everything fell.. I guess..." You cringed at yourself. Bucky winced and looked around again and that's when he realized. You both were cornered against the inner edge of the wall. The racks had fallen in front of you into perfect forts, blocking your way out. He was practically stuffed against you into a crooked modicum of space. Your back was pressed against his chest, his leg pitted against yours. There wasn't a lot he could've done about that. He was trapped in there with you. But most importantly, he had never been this close to you.

His heart did parkours and cartwheels. He could only hope you don't feel how hard it was beating. Where were all these butterflies coming from? His breath hitched, he wasn't even sure if he was breathing anymore, although it was the last concern on his dumb-foundedly racing mind. He could feel the softness of your hair against his neck, he'd be lying if he said that wasn't the softest, gentlest thing he has felt in about the past seven decades. It smelled like an orchard of flowers. He liked flowers. Although he couldn't tell what flower it smelled like, he knew it would've been his favourite flower. It calmed him down, that was, of course until his eyes looked down. He could see the stretch of your dangerously gorgeous collar bones sparkling in your sweat above your dress's boat-like neckline. His atheism breaking at the sight of that sculpted divinity, he couldn't help but pray, "God give me all the strength you can to keep me from kissing that work of art." The quantum leaps between the intervals of his heartbeats weren't helping either. Oh, at this moment, what he wouldn't give up to be the brittle golden necklace cascading from the graceful steeps and lows of your neck to the flesh over your heart. He held back not of strength, but because of fear.

As he was trying to fathom where all these thoughts were coming from, he was interrupted by you glazing your body against his body as you were striving to reach for a way out of the current situation. The way you groaned softly as you tried to reach for the other side of the rack-fort did things to him that he never would have expected. He was practically petrified. You gave up after a few moments, your head falling back against his ribs due to the impact. "Oof," he said his breath tickling your neck, cooling the sweat enough to send chills down your spine. "I'm sorry," you quivered in embarrassment. "So... there's no way out unless someone helps us out from the outside," you reported. He sighed in reply. He was way too nervous right now to speak in words.

"Are you claustrophobic or something?" you asked.

"What?"

"No, your heart has been racing real loud for quite some time now."

"I.. um.. small spaces do that to me,"

"Huh" you huffed.

You felt the coolness of his metal arm against the heated skin below the back of your neck, it was very soothing. He had laid the forearm carefully at a distance from you, and you couldn't help but wish he would wrap it around you. You could feel the vibrations of his vocal cord against your ear lobe as he talked. You were glad he couldn't see your face flushing at that.

Eventually he was able to relax, his heart slowing down. Although the situation was still quite awkward, he was not sure if he was complaining. That's when he heard footsteps. Someone was coming to their rescue. The footsteps grew louder, and there he was.

"Noah!" You exclaimed as he stood in front of you on the other side of the rack-fort. "Y/n! What's.. going on?" Noah asked as he looked at the mess. "Ah, we're trapped. Can you help us out of here?"

~~~

"Thank you," you smiled as he got them out of there with the help of the floor service. "How did you find us here?"

"We had a date, remember? You didn't show up so I just wanted to make sure you were okay."

"Oh my god, yes we did. All this happened and It totally slipped my mind. Thank god, we did though," you chuckled, looking around, "Hey Barnes, This is Noah, he works in the communications department,"

"Hey, man" Noah greeted. Bucky gave him a half-nod and a mean look.

"You know, it's not exactly late. If you are up to it, we could still go grab some dinner," Noah said, giving you this innocent look that Bucky, for some reason, found revolting.

"Yeah? of course," You were all smiles.

Since when does y/n smile like that? What did she see in this guy? He doesn't even know the guy, so why does he hate him so much? He felt displeased with himself for staring at you and Noah, like, why did he even care now? Bucky had so many questions. The answer was walking out of the hall with somebody else, and there was nothing he could do about it.

He was standing there in the once again empty library, lost in the middle of the bustling race track of his thoughts. That was when he felt something tugging at his legs, pulling him out of the maze he was being consumed by. He looked down at his little rescuer with fur as white as snow. "Hello there," He called, gentleness taking over his voice as he squatted down to pet the little cat that was rubbing its ears on his shoe straps. "Where did you come from, doll?" he giggled, scratching it's chin.

~ ( Today ) ~

"You were a no-show at the debriefing. Where were you yesterday?" You asked as you plopped down on the couch in the kitchen Island, your arm resting on the back pillow, turning your head back and looking at Bucky toying with the cutlery on the counter. "I.. was in my room," he said pushing back a stray lock of hair. "Coffee?" "Yeah," you muttered.

As you turned your head you saw a little white cat hopping onto your lap.

"I found her in the library, you know, the other day.. after you left. Guess I'm her owner now, kind of," he said as he handed you the coffee.

"Aww, he made a friend!" You giggled as you scratched the back of the cat's ears. "Hello! Do you like that, you little troublemaker?" you chuckled as the cat warmed up to you with it's eyes closed.

Bucky was blushing like an idiot. You were not gonna lie, that shade of red made him look a little too cute.

"Has she got a name?"

"Yeah well, I named her Alpine. It's a good name, right?"

"Alpine!" you grinned, "It's a lovely name."

"What?" He asked, as you gave him a surprised look after sipping your coffee.

"The coffee is actually good," You said.

"Why, you didn't think I could make good coffee?"

"No, in all these three years, you've brought me coffee like 4 times, 3 out of which you put salt in my coffee and the one time you messed up the sugar real bad. On purpose, I suppose," you accused.

"To be fair, you deserved it,"

"Ah, there it is," you said.

Bucky couldn't help but stare at you. Here he was, sitting on the couch beside you, getting high of sorts on how close he was to you. He had been craving for it ever since the archive library. He locked himself in his room all yesterday, convincing himself that what he felt towards you wasn't real, although it only made more sense despite his inability to believe it. And here you were now, recklessly playing with his heartstrings. The image of a rogue strand of your hair caressing your temple, and your eyes becoming a softer shade of (y/e/c) as the sunlight fell on them vaporized the levee he built around the feelings he never thought would see the light of day again.

As if breaking him out of his trance, you said, "Ah, I'd love to hang around with you guys, but I gotta go. I said I'll be meeting Noah in a couple minutes."

"Right," he could feel his heart dropping for a second.

"Alright then... bye!" You called, and walked out of the room, as he watched your hair swaying to your stride.

And here he was, on the couch, wondering about what just happened. Alpine half asleep on his lap as he unconsciously whispered, "How did this happen?"

~~~~

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teenyweenynightghost · 3 years ago

Text

Måneskin Group Chat- Chapter 5

(Ok so I will be a decent human being and give y’all a bit more of a warning. So when I wrote the angsty plot last night i was feeling dramatic so now i have to listen to sad music so i can get in the mood for writing what i hope will be the last non-text chapter. Anyway, once this is posted my writing is no longer my problem so be cautious)

Warnings: my writing, language

“Ethan”

His name echoed in my head over and over again, a beautiful song with no end, an orchestra made of nature’s most delicate creatures. The sounds of birds chirping and leaves rustling as the wind softly blows them all around...that’s what hearing and saying his name felt like. As if the sun suddenly peeked through an endless sea of stormy clouds. Everything began warming up, all doubts and worries left my mind, as if on instinct, so that it can be filled with the one thing that truly healed it, the one thing that truly healed my soul- my darling Ethan.

“Y/N?” Damiano asked from the drivers seat, again, and thus succeeding at making me stop thinking about Ethan, for a second time. I was close to killing him.

“What is it” I asked sharply. “We’re home” he responded, with a soft look on his face.

Oh. Shit.

Now this was very much not a fairytale anymore and the peaceful sound of birds chirping turned into an irritating non-stop alarm that scratched my ears. Focusing on all of the things that bothered me, I forgot to get out of the car, thus having Thomas slowly picking me up and putting me on the alley-way.

“You know what I realised” I said, softly looking at the sky.

“You’re in love with Ethan?” asked Victoria with a cheeky expression on her face

“What? No Im not Ethan is my best friend and I do- O MY FUCKING GOD” My face fell at the sudden realisation . Behind me i could hear three people losing their shit laughing. The world was spinning under me and the corners of my eyes turned black.

“Holy Fuck Victoria why the fuck didn’t you tell me earlier you dumbass YOU LEFT ME ALONE!” I kept on rambling trying to find an excuse for being in this overwhelming nerve-wrecking minefield of an emotion. Meanwhile, I am pretty sure I heard Damiano trying to help Thomas up, after he inevitably fell down from laughing too hard. At me.

A sudden wave of embarrassment rushed over me. “What the fuck guys! First you kidnapp me, then you tell me i love Ethan and now you’re laughing at me!?

Vic wiped a tear and tried to answer through giggles “Im sorry cucciola but the way you reacted to it all is just hilarious! I mean it literally is like that audio on tik tok with the piano song- at first its soft and peaceful, just like you were in the car ride here, and then the realisation hit, and, in perfect sync with the music you realised the clownery of it all!

I heard a howling laughter coming from behind me. I turned to see Damiano on his knees, choking and struggling to breathe, as he was cackling even harder than before. “Shut up” I muttered quickly and went inside.

I quickly made my way up the creaky stairs and ran to the bathroom. I slammed the door shut and let my emotions overwhelm me. My night had gone horribly wrong. I was right. I knew I wasn’t made for these things. God, what was my poor date even thinking. What was I thinking? Was I really in love with Ethan?

I kept sobbing and shaking until I heard a light knock on the door. I tried to wipe away my face quickly but it was too late. In a moment I had Ethan’s strong arms wrapped around me, bringing me the comfort i so badly wanted. “Shh, princess, it’s alright. You don’t have to think about anything right now” He had no idea how much those words meant to me. No idea how much he meant to me. I snuggled my face in the crook of his neck, as he shifted his weight so that we could both sit comfortably. He started humming lightly, and his vibrations only soothed me further. His fingers started playing with my hair, before going to my shoulders and massaging them lightly. I slowly closed my eyes, and noticed how I had unconsciously matched my breathing with his. He smelt like sandalwood and a dark stormy day, a scent which for years comforted me deeply. I slowly started feeling his muscles flexing as he picked me up and took me to his bedroom. He laid me down on the mattress and got right behind me. He helped take off my clothes and did the same with his. All we were now was a tangled mess of limbs.

I started becoming incredibly aware of everything. His breath on my neck, his calloused hands sliding up and down my bare back, barely even grazing it. I shivered and his eyed immediately met mine. “Are you cold, cara mia?” “No, don’t worry about it.” I snuggled into him even further, and soon there was nothing between us. Not even air.

For the first time that night, I felt at peace. As if nothing was in its wrong place, as if i wasn’t doing something bad or that I would regret. I knew what Victoria had said, and I just couldn’t wait any longer. Thinking back to all the moments Ethan had tried to express his emotions to me- offering me a warm cup of coffee every morning, offering to take care of my goats, despite being quite furious with my purchase initially. His actions spoke louder than his words. As if on cue, he tightened his arms around my waist and left a chaste kiss on my neck.

“Ethan” i muttered half-asleep. “Yes darling” His eyes were closed, no frown on his face and all of his muscled relaxed. He looked so at peace, so young. I smiled slightly and brought my forehead to his. Our noses touched, and thats when he opened his eyes too. I was met with his sleepy but affectionate gaze, dark and striking, reading all of my secrets.

“What were you going to say cucciola?” His eyes never once left mine, only gently bringing me back to reality. I smiled and brushed a hair strand behind his ears. “I’m in love with you.” His eyes widened. He scanned my face to see if he heard me right and i only smiled to reaffirm my words. His lips were instantly in mine, capturing them in what felt like the most passionate kiss I ever had. We moved in sync as he brought his hands up to cup my face, and I couldn’t help but smile. We pulled apart, no longer being able to breathe, but staying so close we could hear each other’s heartbeat. “ I’m in love with you as well”. He kissed me once more, then pulled me back into his arms. He brushed my hair again and with that, we both drifted to sleep.

-------------

I was awoken by a few light beams filtering through the curtains. Behind me, I felt someone breath evenly as their arms held me close. My mind wandered back to the events of last night. We were off to a rocky start, but it was all forgiven once I came home to him.

Y/n tried to turn softly so that she wouldn’t wake Ethan up. Now facing him, she couldn’t help but admire his soft features. She left a few soft kisses on his cheek, before lightly brushing her lips with him. At that, the boy in front of her opened his eyes, and smiled brightly. He cupped her cheek and brought their faces together, kissing her once more.

The pair stayed cuddled like this for a few more minutes before heading downstairs. Y/n approached the coffee machine and turned it on, while Ethan took some leftover patisserie from yesterday. After all of the food was on the table, Y/n went to sit down, only to be interrupted by Ethans grunt. He took a seat on one of the chairs and beckoned her to come closer. “C’mere amore”. Y/n did as she was told and went to sit on his lap. They ate together in silence, listening to the soft tunes playing on the radio.

Out of nowhere, they heard some giggling. They both turned around and saw three heads peeking from the staircase. Y/n rolled her eyes and sighed gravely, earning a chuckle from Ethan. The three musketeers who created so much chaos the previous night, emerged from their poor hiding spot singing Italy’s National Anthem.

Y/N scoffed at that and Ethan smirked. “So, who finally confessed” asked Victoria cheekily. “We both did, but Ethans came second” Y/n said proudly. Now it was Ethan’s turn to scoff. Thomas, who was still pissed that he had been woken up so early stole the remaining croissant out of Y/Ns plate and ate it in one bite. The rest of the band sat down and enjoyed some coffee too, as Y/Ns goats kept bugging the poor guitarist.

“Well, Im glad the issue between you two has been fixed. I was starting to choke on all that tension” said Damiano out of nowhere.

“Ha ah very funny” answered Ethan, his face completely blank. Y’N turned around and kissed him once more, to keep Damiano on Ethan’s good side.

The rest of their day was similar. Soft touches, random glances filled with love, kissed in between the bands’ practice sessions...

Truth be told, no one was happier than the two lovers who no longer kept their feelings hidden under the mask of friendship.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Omg so I was listening to some classical music and just as I was getting to the mushy parts it started playing a circus theme omg the universe is talking to me and im afraid its not good.

Anyway i hope you liked it, i will definitely continue chapter 6 as being chaotic and sarcastic, however , if yall want to, i could possibly write some blurbs with ethan x reader.

Until then, y’all can wait until the next chapter cuz its seven am and i have a long and empty day ahead of me

#victoria de angelis #ethan torchio #thomas raggi #damiano david #maneskin #måneskin #this shit took the life out of me

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mydayserenade · 3 years ago

Text

My Dear Starlight

Yunho x OC

rom, angst, fluff (???)

first time playing around w/ this kind of genre so apologies if its shitty

i suggest listening to Fix You by Coldplay cause it will definitely send you to sad hours while reading

"Do you remember the last time we went star-gazing? It was the night before I eventually confessed to you, we were lying on the grass and I was pretty much sleep deprived and alongside handling an empty stomach that was growling" he said and chuckled, reminiscing the sweet moment ever so vividly like it happened just yesterday. Yunho took his attention off the sky and watched silently as his fiance gaze the starry night without even noticing him staring at her like she was the brightest thing to ever exist as of the moment, which has always been a thing for them to do to each other... but mostly Yunho.

"I do dummy, can you believe it has been 5 years since then? Time flies so fast" Luna responded, leaning towards her right side to get a closer look at Yunho's visuals "And now here we are, engaged and a few months away from officially tying the knot." she giggled, toying with the necklace that he gave to her during their first anniversary and looked back at the night once more to admire it; the moon dawned on them like a bright spotlight, the sky was as blue as the deep sea, complimenting the shining stars that laced the sky, telling tales of long lost lovers which completed the visually angelic twilight that these two would share for hours.

Yunho looks over to his paramour with the endearment in his doey eyes and smiles ever so sweetly as she laid beside him, interlocking hands with one another and her hair that sprawled like beautiful waves; in a swift move he sits himself up and props Luna to lay down on his chest. Luna responds in a squeak, shocked by the sudden gesture her fiance did.

"Whenever you miss me" Yunho broke the silence between them and rested his cheek on the head of his soon-to-be Mrs. Jeong, she flinches as she felt his warm arms wrap around her chest, feeling his heartbeat going at a slow but steady pace.

"Um, where are you going with this?" she asked confusingly as Yunho snuggled on her neck, inhaling the delicate perfume that he oh so loved whenever she would put it on; he breathes in the intoxicating fragrance and lets out a satisfied sigh before he continued.

"It's just an intrusive thought" he replied and continued to snuggle, "but whenever you miss me while I'm away or when I suddenly get called by the House of Hufflepuff" he said jokingly in the last part, receiving a slap on the arm by her and continued on. "Look up at the night sky and think of me. My mom always told me that I had a special connection with celestial things most especially stars. I thought it was just nonsense she shared with me as a teenager but as I got older and took into consideration the feelings I had and enviroment or situations I was in, I did notice a few things that made me convinced that my mom was indeed right about her speculations." Luna was bewildered, all she could do was laugh. This was the first time she has ever heard of this story from Yunho considering the fact they've been together for 5 years, 24/7, 365 and he would often share his most atrocious memories; even his embarassing ones. She looked up at Yunho who was looking straight at her, showing how perplexed she was by her furrowed brows and confused grin.

"So you're telling me, God decided to make your bloodline 40% human and 60% celestial and as you age the more you feel connected with these things, will somehow tingle in your bones and signal you to shoot supernovas out of your hands like Starfire or some shit whenever it's nightime?" she asks.

"You're phrasing it like it's a crazy Sci-Fi movie Luna, I wasn't even finished." Yunho eyerolls and massages the bridge of his nose, letting out a deep sigh of annoyance. Luna enjoyed teasing him and seeing him all fired up; even if Yunho had a fierce exterior that people would be afraid of approaching, only few knew his childish side and how young at heart he was for things that he loved and took interest in.

"Go on continue, I was just annoying you." she giggles at the sight of him pouting and scrunching up his nose, Yunho takes a deep breath before he proceeds to the next.

"Eversince I was a little boy and when there were times where I had no one to play around with" Yunho looks up at the stars and grows a grin on his face as he points upward "they were always my companion and relate to how I was feeling. Whenever I felt happy, it would always blink at me, become bigger in size and blind me with its light; however when I felt sad, it would always shrink and release very little light. It would sometimes respond to the many queries I had and decisions by its blinking, it somehow felt like I had a mood lamp with me everywhere I go." he crooks his head to the right, scoffing at the many memories of him that flashed in his mind. "Even if I had no one to talk to at that time, as crazy as it sounds, the stars comforted me in a way that is unexplainable."

"It felt like someone understood the things you were going through like no one else has, almost as if you had an alternate you up in the galaxies." Luna looked up at how Yunho admired each white dot with the happiness in his eyes, looking so astonished like a little kid who just visited a candy store for the very first time. She now understood the many moments where he would suddenly look up the sky while driving, walking or even eating and just stare for seconds before eventually returning to what he was doing, almost as if he was thanking the heavens above or checking up on them like they were part of his family.

"You understand now? Whenever that time comes, just look up and I'm there." He whispers in Luna's ear, hands interlocking with hers and giving her a soft kiss on the head. Luna couldn't help but tear up by the gentle gesture Yunho did, the tale he had told and the thought of not seeing him for even a second. He was her rock and she was his, not a day would go by if they did not see each other in between the hours.

"I do Yunho, I do." she sits up and faces Yunho, cupping his face with her warm hands with Yunho gently caressing it and gives him a gentle kiss on the lips.

6 years later...

"I'm here" Luna whispered, standing in the middle of the silent and deserted park which was quiet enough to hear her; holding onto her precious necklace, she looked up the sky, admiring the white dots that scattered the sky. The stars were a bit different from normal, they were shining and twinkling more and more, almost as if it was calling out to her in morse code.

"You should really try and hide your excitement to a bare minimum, see this is why I never planned any surprise parties with you" she scoffed and sat down on the grass, closing her eyes and completely taking in the midnight breeze that brushed against her skin and blew on her hair. She lets out a sigh and toyed with the golden chain that was entangled on her fingers, feeling every abrasion and imperfection this necklace presented.

"You're probably wondering why I am here at 3 am in the morning" she said, fluttering her eyes to a vast field with streetlights surrounding it, "Awww man" Luna laughed, "You're most likely gonna kill me if I went out especially in this hour, well truth be told Mr. Jeong; are you battling me now with this cold gust of wind you blow?"

No one responds.

"I thought so too." she said under her breath as she hangs her head down, taking a deep breath before she continued to talk.

"I came here because I couldn't really sleep well these past few days and" she starts to choke up, sniffling and trying her absolute best to not break down, that's the last thing he would want Luna to do... especially in a time like this. "I don't know" she shrugs, rubbing her hands on her face. "I've been in my head too much, I've been emotionally unstable for the first time in a long time and I'm just" she suddenly pauses while a million thoughts circulates her mind. She urged herself to keep a strong and stable state for the past 6 years in front of friends and family, always say she was doing alright and all but deep down inside she was suffering the greatest loss of all and couldn't even bare to hold it in any longer.

"Yunho I'm so so so sorry" she lets out her tears, hysterically wailing on the field. She clutches her heart, completely lost her sense of reality and just wanted to scream out the pain and tiredness she has been holding on for the past few years, hiding behind a facadé so that people around her would not have to feel the burden that she might put on them. The countless nights of tear stained pillows and fake happy days were all weeped away at this night, she looks up at the skies; frozen and chanting swear words like a maniac.

"I'm sorry for not noticing sooner how much you suffered on the inside, for being such an asshole to you during those times and for not being enough of a friend and wife to you." she whimpered, losing all her might to prop herself up. In a graceful fall she lands on the grass, curled up, shiverring and clutching her knees amidst the cold breeze and moist grass under her.

"I'm a terrible person, I'm a fucking disgrace, and yet somehow I still exist in this world when it should've been you who is still alive. I tried my best to not worry you every night by saying I was doing okay, that I was living good and this and that, but for the past few days..." she closes her eyes and squeezes the pendant with her palm as tears streamed endlessly down her cheeks, "The wave of guilt just hit me harder than ever and I honestly am not so sure I can carry on this shameful life that only keeps me breathing."

From the day she knew up until his deathbed, Yunho never wanted Luna to see him at his worst neither did he want her to struggle and pity him, but his condition allowed Luna to see her beloved slowly succumb bit by bit. As much as she wanted to help him; he would always brush it off, plaster on his dimpled smile and please her in the best of his abilities and strength even if his state wasn't the way it was before. He did not want Luna to regret the moments she had with him and only fill her memories with the pain that he had felt and the hardships he's going through. She didn't agree to any of his ordeals but he had tried and persuaded her to commit to his wishes, in the end however; it would only lead to many arguements and her cursing him out. Eventually she caved in and did the best she could to seize the days, nights and hours with the presence of her one and only love yet deep down inside she was guilty of not helping with his condition and wanted to cater to his medical needs even if she had to travel miles away to get what he asks for.

"I respected your wishes, I carried on the many months with you with a positive outlook and a cheery personality. I was happy during those times I'll admit, because I was by your side everyday until the last second of you breathing, but at the back of my mind I knew I should've gone against what you wanted me to do and assist to your needs." she runs her hand through her hair, fuming at the thought of herself not doing her part during the days of Yunho's struggles. "You told me that I shouldn't feel guilty as this isn't my fault that you were diagnosed with this and it isn't my business to meddle around something like this, but goddamnit Yunho" she breathes uncontrollably as tears yet again pools in her eyes "I'm your fucking wife! I'm your best friend! I have been with you for as long as I can remember and I have made a vow to you that I'm gonna take care of you and nurture you when needed until our hair turns gray and we are all wrinkled." She bursts into annoyance and disappointment. None of what she did made perfect sense to her, all she wanted was to cry and rewind time so that she can make up for the past mistakes she's done and the many regrets she wanted to be erased in her mind. Luna didn't have the energy to continue on and she just lied in the grass, sprawled out and cried until her lungs gave out. She felt pain, she felt disappointment, she felt useless, she felt defeated.

A blinding light then hovers over Luna's exhausted and tearstained body, at first she did not mind this but as the light lingered on her for how many minutes now, she was irritated to this God-like halo that did not want to leave her be. She then slowly opens her eyes and was immediately welcomed to a soft, bright and white light that the moon shined on her, way different from the previous. The stars then aligned, creating a mystical ceiling that somehow calmed Luna's nerves and distract her away from her thoughts, it shined excitingly but twinkled in a calm matter. Luna was in awe at how much beauty the sky emmited, she had completely felt relaxed and wiped the tears that streamed down her face. She goes on to bask under the moonlight and stars, breathing in and out and feeling liberated and worry-free, something she has never felt ever since Yunho was put to rest.

"Now I truly understand what you meant." she mumbled, feeling lighter than ever. Luna then proceeds to put back her shoes on and did a flying kiss to the air multiple times before she left the park. "I think I know what I need to do now." she smiled and took a deep breath.

"Thank you for giving me something I never believed in but eventually found myself with you, love." she sighs lovingly as she gets up and moves towards her car. She takes one last look at the stars and glances down the necklace she has been holding. "Thank you for tonight, see you soonest, my dear starlight."

#ateez yunho #yunho #jeong yunho #ateez #ateez fluff #ateez angst #ateez fanfic

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bookstantrash · 4 years ago

Text

A/N: First of all, I’d like to thank everyone who left a comment, reblogged or liked Part One of this fic. It made my day ❤️

I hope this chapter reaches your expectations. I’m still knew at writing multi-chapter fics, so I apologise if it’s too long or too boring. I want to let you guys know Kaelin better and also show Nesta’s (and Cassian’s) journey. But enough blabbering. Please give a warm welcome to Part Two!

In which she makes a friend, Part Two

Nesta remained frozen beside Kaelin’s body for what seemed an eternity. Seconds that felt more like hours went by until her mind finally snapped back to reality.

She could not give herself the luxury of freaking out right now. She needed to be practical. She needed to help Kaelin.

The sky was beginning to get dark and Nesta knew they had to get out of the forest fast. She recalled Cassian’s warning the first day she had arrived.

To never wander in the forest at dark, for the beasts which roamed them at nightfall made Hybern’s monsters at the war seem like child’s play.

“Kaelin. Listen to me. I’m going to help you” Nesta said, and Kaelin only whimpered as another wave of pain came “But we have to leave”

“It hurts” the young girl managed to say, tears streaming down her face “I can’t— can’t move”

Nesta eyed Kaelin’s figure. She was way too skinny for a thirteen year old standards, even if she’d been having regular meals for the past month.

But Nesta didn’t think she’d have the strength to carry her.

She had not eaten a proper meal in months.

Did not exercise.

You’re too heavy.

The memory of herself trying to raise another body from the ground came to mind, and she gritted her teeth to avoid screaming.

Once again, she was powerless.

This time, however, she would not lay on the ground.

She would rise. Even if her miserable bones broke beneath Kaelin’s weight.

“I’ll carry you, but you’ll have to help me” Nesta slowly sit Kaelin up, and looked straight in her eyes “Can you be strong for me now? I need you to move just enough to get on my back”

Kaelin nodded weakly and, panting, did what she was told.

Grabbing the girl’s legs in a firm hold, Nesta bit her cheek and got up, her knees screaming in protest.

“Okay ” she breathed, silently praying her body could hold on long enough to make the ten minute walk back to the cabin “I’m going to move now, so brace yourself”

She took a step forward and had to muster all her strength to not fall down with Kaelin. She remembered giving piggy back rides to Elain when she little — before her mother had deemed it unladylike and punished her. A long time had passed since then. She had been stronger and Elain did not have wings to add to her weight as Kaelin had.

But Nesta focused on the action of putting one foot after the other, her breaths coming in pants, willing her legs to keep moving.

‘Almost there’ she thought as she slowly made her back ‘Just keep moving. It’s not that far’

She repeated that over and over in hopes to distract her body. Her arms were trembling and her tights burned, yet she kept her pace.

After what seemed an eternity, Nesta finally spotted the cabin’s familiar rooftop. She almost sighed in relief.

Awkwardly opening the door and closing it shut with her foot, she went to her room, trying to lay Kaelin down on her bed as smoothly as possible.

She tried to regain her breath. Cauldron, how her back hurt.

Kaelin had curled up again, and was clenching her stomach so hard Nesta wondered if she was actually trying to claw her way into her own body so she could rip her ovaries out.

“I’ll be right back” Nesta said, smoothing some hair from Kaelin’s forehead.

She went to the kitchen, searching for something that would calm the poor girl’s pain. Nesta had not had her period as a fae yet —the huge amounts of alcohol and lack of food in the last year were probably the reason why — but remembered how it was when she used to be a human. She’d get horrible headaches and just lay down all day waiting for the pain to go away. She could only imagine how dreadful the experience must be for the fae.

Getting hold of some ginger, she put water in a kettle to prepare some tea, hoping Kaelin would be able to at least drink it. After that, she went into the shared bathroom between her room and Cassian’s.

And stopped right in front of the bathtub.

She still had trouble taking baths.

Had grown used to her old and deplorable bathtub back in her shabby apartment in Velaris.

And when she had arrived and came face to face with a bathtub big enough to accommodate wings, its dark stone a stark reminder of the Cauldron... she had frozen up. Refused to enter it. Even now, after months living in Cassian’s cabin, she could not stomach the ideia of doing it.

So she waited until Cassian left for his training and took a bucket to wash herself. It was a long process and rather difficult to wash her hair, but at least she could stay clean.

Yet, she could not do the same with Kaelin. The girl was sweaty and dirty with blood. And Nesta knew that a hot bath would do wonders to the cramps, relaxing her.

Raising her chin as if battling an invisible enemy, she got near the bathtub for the first time, turning the faucet and letting it be filled with hot water. Her heartbeat quickened as the water rose and rose, her powers a volcano in her veins, and she had to close her fists tight enough to hurt to not shatter the whole bathroom.

‘It’s not the Cauldron. It’s not the Cauldron’ reaching a tentative hand, she dipped it in the water to check the temperature ‘This water is hot. The Cauldron’s was cold. They are not the same’

Nesta turned the faucet off, and some tension eased off from her shoulders. Looking around the bathroom, she located the camomile oil Cassian kept. She had once heard it helped ease the soreness of the muscles after extensive training.

Putting it in the water, she found herself feeling a bit guilty for using it. It was not hers. Nothing in that house was. But Cassian was not here, and she doubted he’d notice that the little flask was missing some of its content.

She went back to her bedroom, and helped Kaelin take her leathers and tunic off, as she did with the band the girl had wrapped around her breasts, as small as they still were. Only thirteen, the period in which her body was slowly maturing, yet she was going through those body changes alone. The danger of being found out hanging around her neck like a rope.

Nesta tried not to flinch at the sight of the purple bruises along Kaelin’s back and ribs. A girl training the same amount as an Illyrian boy.... she must be very strong to take it all.

Kaelin wobbled towards the bathroom with Nesta’s help, breathing a sight of relief when her body came in contact with the hot water. Letting her soak for a while, Nesta stripped down some clean linens and left them on the bed.

Now the only matter were the clothes.

Nesta had brought few clothes with her, and most of them did not go along with the ruthless Illyrian weather. She eyed the lower drawer of the dresser. The one which she had not dared to touch.

She had been stubborn and refused to accept any more charity from her sister and her mate, sticking with her old dresses and overcoat instead. It was not as if she left the cabin long enough to die of frostbite.

Yet even if Kaelin was used to Illyria’s harsh weather, wearing warm clothes would make her more comfortable. Nesta was not as ruthless as to lend one of her thin run down dresses.

Sighting, she opened the drawer. And almost took a step back in surprise. For there lay clothes not in Night Court’s colours or the typical winter clothes one would find selling in Velaris.

No, they were Illyrian clothes. And not just leathers.

There were cotton sweaters, leggings, tunics and soft pants that Nesta would have never thought of wearing. And the colours.... Gods the colours. There was a range of colours from grey to auburn, burgundy, royal blue and forest green. The kind of colours that Nesta could imagine herself in.

She was so marvelled by them that she almost missed the small note on top of one sweater.

‘These are for you. I took the liberty of buying them, but if you prefere another clothing style feel free to tell me — Cassian’

He had bought her clothes. He, not her sister. And Cassian had kept quiet about it. Had not said a word before his trip about how she had never opened that drawer.

Had given her space. A choice.

Had she perhaps misunderstood his apparent cold behaviour? Was he perhaps giving her time to get used to her current situation? Was he distancing himself so it was her choice when the time to talk came?

Picking some clothes for Kaelin and laying them on the bed, Nesta tucked that information deep inside herself, feeling an annoying warmth in her heart she had not felt in a long time.

~•~

“What did you say?”

“You heard me perfectly clear or have you become deaf with your age?” Nesta replied to the camp lord in front of her, the mask of a bored and mighty queen mastered to perfection.

“I was not informed about this” Devlon said, anger lacing his every word.

“You were not notified because it was not necessary” she spat back, a cold fury settling in her veins “So let it be known that Kaelin will be staying with me for the time being to help in an important and secret matter, none of which are for you to worry about”

“How dare—“

“Have a good day” cutting Devlon off before he nagged at her some more, Nesta left him standing at the training area.

She heard Devlon bark an order for the Illyrians to get back to training, the sound of swords clashing against each soon rising again. She tried not to flinch at the sounds, keeping her mask up until she was safely back at the cabin.

Once inside, Nesta let herself rest against the door, sighing. She was tired. The events of yesterday and today’s morning had taken a tool on her. It had been a while since she had worn the unfeeling ice queen mask. She didn’t recall it to be so tiring.

But rest would have to wait a little bit. She had to check on Kaelin. And demand an explanation.

The night before, after Kaelin had gotten out of the bath and was dressed, Nesta had given the ginger tea and coaxed her into drinking it all. Not long after that, the poor girl fell asleep.

Nesta, on the hand, stayed awake for the better part of the night, dozing off in a chair near the bed, waking up whenever she heard Kaelin move.

When the birds had started to sing in the early morning, Nesta had came up with a plan. Leaving a tray with light food and tea in the bedside for Kaelin, she dressed herself and braided her hair neatly, preparing to go after Devlon. She had to make sure that Kaelin could stay away from training during her cycle and that her secret kept being a secret.

But the Illyrian had some gaps to fill in.

“Nesta?” she heard a soft voice calling from her room, and taking a deep breath, moved from her position.

“Good morning” Nesta said, finding the girl awake and less pale than yesterday “How do you feel?”

“Better” Kaelin was slowing making her way through breakfast “But, training...Devlon....how—”

“It’s been taken care of off” taking her position from the past night, Nesta squared her shoulders and took a business like voice “You have a story to tell”

Kaelin, noticing how the air had become serious, lost no time and, stopping sometimes when the cramps returned with full force, told Nesta everything.

Kaelin’s mother, as she said before, had a fragile health, made worse by the heavy workload imposed on the females. Add that to a difficult pregnancy, you have the recipe for an early labour.

Right in the middle of the heaviest snow storm to have ever befallen on Illyria. Which lasted for four days and four nights.

Making it impossible for a midwife to get there.

Mikael, her father, aided his wife, Selin, all on his own.

A warrior born to kill. To reap lives.

However, for her he would bring life. He would do everything he could.

It was not enough.

He was not able to stop Selin’s internal bleeding. Or her death.

And so, thirteen years ago, on the day Illyria bled white while Selin bled red, a healthy little girl was born.

Yet after the blizzard stopped and Mikael buried his wife, a boy was announced to have been born.

“Protect her” Selin had whispered with her last breath “Let our daughter be free and strong. Let her know no fear. Let her be as wild as Sanuur, the Mother of all forests. As ruthless as the old Illyrian warriors. As wise as our matriarchs.”

Mikael kept his promise. He raised Kaelin as a boy in secret as best as he could. Until he was killed in the Hybern War.

And Kaelin was alone.

An orphan who nothing deserved to have, save for a duffel bag with whatever she could grab before she was kicked out of her childhood home — a one room wood cabin, built by her father after years of hard work — in the mud.

After the rumours that a Witch now lived with the General, Kaelin had a mad plan: she’d give anything, even her soul, to avoid getting what would raise a red flag to her secret.

“I starved and ate herbs that were said to make one avoid getting periods” Kaelin said, looking down at her empty cup “But those things made me far too weak. I was falling behind training. I am at the age boys grow like trees and start to get buffer. I needed a quick solution”

And Nesta had been feeding her.

Oh, she was going to get sick. Had she doomed Kaelin while thinking she was saving a poor orphan?

“From now on,” Nesta announced “I’ll be the one to keep your father’s promise. You will live with me”

It did no good to dwell on what could have been. What had been done was done.

For the first time in five months, the fog inside Nesta’s mind seemed to lift.

“You will live with me. And I will train with you”

Because never again would she be weak. Never again would she be at someone’s mercy.

Nesta Archeron was going to show Illyria just how much she should be feared.

•

Tags: @sayosdreams @thewayshedreamed @sjm-things @perseusannabeth @arin1030-blog @caotica-e-quieta @vidalinav @swankii-art-teacher @ireallyshouldsleeprn @duskandstarlight @greerlunna @thegoddessaltenia @dayanna-hatter @verypaleninja

{Please let me know if you’d like to be added to my tag list}

#sarah j maas #sjmaas #sjm fanfic #nesta archeron

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tuiccim · 4 years ago

Text

Conquest

Loki One Shot

Pairing : Loki x Female Reader

Warnings: Language, implied smut, fluff (so ridiculously fluffy and cheesy)

So, this is my first time publishing a fanfic. This was supposed to be very different but kinda just developed this way. Hope you enjoy

-------------------

You wake with a start. Turning to the clock on the nightstand you see it’s 2:45am. Four hours of sleep. After getting back from the mission yesterday you had eaten a bowl of cereal, showered, and went to bed. Burying your head back in the pillows you try to will sleep to return but it's impossible. You knew that as soon as you woke. With a heavy sigh, you throw your covers off and change into workout gear.

Heading to the training room, you knew you’d be the only one awake. Might as well use the time for something productive. You grab some knives and begin throwing at a target.

“You have quite the aim.” Comes from behind you.

You turn to see Loki standing only a few feet from you. “How do you always manage to sneak up on me?”

“I wait until you’re distracted.” Loki smiles. “And I am the god of mischief, darling.”

Ugh, the pet names. Loki, always with the darlings and loves when speaking to you. He had been at the tower with the rest of the Avengers for nearly six months now. Working to redeem himself he had blithely put it. He was always curt with everyone but whenever you two were alone he seemed to let his guard down a bit. You weren't sure why. He was attractive and when the two of you talked he was charming and intelligent. But something inside always made you cautious of him. After all, as he reminded everyone often, you were all merely midgardians.

"Couldn't sleep?" You ask.

The god gives a non committal shrug before walking to the weapon locker.

"Care to spar?" You decide to challenge him.

He turns to you with a raised eyebrow, "I'm afraid you'd be woefully outmatched."

Rolling your eyes you grab two sparring daggers. "You like to play with knives, right?"

"Hmmmm...yes, I do enjoy giving a good stabbing now and then." He smirks as he palms two daggers.

You twirl the daggers. Loki usually found a tongue-in-cheek way to say things and so you had expected a sly comment. "Hope you understand I won't be the one getting stabbed." You meet his eyes and smirk back at him.

"Now, now, (Y/N), you should be careful when challenging a god."

Without warning you lunge at Loki who quickly sidesteps you. In another second the air is singing with clangs as your daggers meet. Fairly well matched you meet each other measure for measure for several minutes. Loki smiles and takes stance as you advance on him but when you swing your dagger at him it goes through him. You lose your balance at the lack of resistance and the next thing you know arms have wrapped around you from behind with a dagger pressed to your throat and another pressed against your stomach.

“Looks like you will be the one getting stabbed. Drop them, darling.’ Loki lips are close to your ear.

“That's cheating, Loki!” You say.

“Oh no, love, that’s using all of your resources.” He whispers, sending a shiver down your spine. “Surrender. You know you want to.”

The air had changed. The way Loki was pressed against your body alerted you to his maleness. He was no longer speaking of the sparring.

“What are you doing, Loki?” You ask breathlessly.

“What we’ve both wanted all along.” He pulls the dagger away from your throat and leans down to press his lips to the side of your neck. “Am I wrong? I don’t think I am. I hear your heartbeat increase when I come near you. Even now I can feel the heat radiating off of you.”

Dropping the daggers in your hands, Loki loosens his grip allowing you to turn in his arms. You run your hands up his chest before sliding them around his neck and into his hair, his eyes are smouldering into you as you stare up at him. Bringing your lips within millimeters of his, you grip a handful of his hair and say, "Attraction for you? No, you’re not wrong. But I’m more than just a conquest for fun.” With that you pull away leaving a stunned god of mischief standing in the middle of the training room.

In the elevator you leaned your head back against the wall. Did that arrogant ass think you'd just lay down on the mat for him? Ugh. And it pissed you off that your body betrayed you. Feeling him against you, heat had pooled between your legs. It wasn't that you were a prude, but when it comes to teammates it just wasn't a good idea to fuck around. If it was, you would have made the rounds a few times already. It's not like there was an unattractive person in the bunch.

Back in your room, you look around trying to figure out what to do with yourself now. Frustration strained through you. You pull out your laptop to work on the mission report when a soft knock sounds at your door. You stare at it for a moment. Your thoughts warring between wanting it to be Loki and wanting it to be anyone else. You were a little surprised when you opened the door to actually find Loki there.

"May we speak?" He says in a low voice. You stared directly in his eyes and thought you saw just the barest amount of vulnerability. That's what made you step back from the door and wave him in.

You close the door and look at the beautiful man...god before you. "I've never been in your room." He says as he ambles around. "Interesting decor you have."

"Uninteresting stalling tactic you have." Crossing your arms, you raise an eyebrow at him. "What are you doing here, Loki?"

He looks at you and something in his demeanor softens. "You're not a conquest." He says quietly.

You hold his gaze, waiting him out until he finally turns away, ostensibly to look at your bookshelf. "You...you've always been kind to me. Talked to me as if I'm any other teammate. Had my back." he turns back to make eye contact, "Trusted me to have yours. You've never seemed to hold my past wickedness against me. And I've appreciated it. When I'm with you I feel...I don't know...worthy. Honorable. Content."

"I…"

"Let me finish, please. You are a light for me and I'm sorry if I made you feel less than that. You are completely right. You are not a conquest. And I went about it all wrong." He had slowly moved towards you and you were mesmerized by the look in his eyes and the sound of his voice. You stood rooted to the spot as he approached and when he was mere inches from you he lifted his hands to cup your cheeks. "You are so much more than I can describe. I love you, (Y/N)."

Your eyes widened at his confession and your heart leaps, but the voice nags at the back of your mind. "I'm only a human, Loki. Fleeting, I believe, is how you put it."

"I would rather have a fleeting moment with you than a thousand lifetimes with any other. Tell me to go and I'll go, but if I have any chance of winning you…"

You felt the tether holding you back break and your words came out in a rush, "It was the Shelley."

"Shelley?"

"A few weeks ago, we were reading in the common room and I heard you reciting it under your breath. Love's Philosophy by Percy Shelley. And I found myself distracted entirely from my book. I was looking at the god of mischief and lies but his heart was laid open in that moment. I thought to myself if I could only see that look directed at me, I would fall so hard. And I see it now. I love you, Loki. You're my light, too."

"Say it again...please." Loki pressed his forehead to yours. His voice strained with emotion.

"I love you. I love you, Loki."

"That poem." He says, "What was the last bit? Oh, yes...

'And the sunlight clasps the earth,

And the moonbeams kiss the sea –

what are all these kissings worth,

If thou kiss not me?'"

Your lips met and in that moment your souls touched.

The fountains mingle with the river

Love's Philosophy by Percy Bysshe Shelley

And the rivers with the Ocean,

The winds of Heaven mix for ever

With a sweet emotion;

Nothing in the world is single;

All things by a law divine

in one another’s being mingle –

Why not I with thine?

See the mountains kiss high Heaven

And the waves clasp one another;

No sister-flower would be forgiven

If it disdain’d its brother:

And the sunlight clasps the earth,

And the moonbeams kiss the sea –

what are all these kissings worth,

If thou kiss not me?

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cyoza · 4 years ago

Note

1. :(

Helllooooo

I’m so so so sorry this has taken me so long. At first I couldn’t find my footing with this request and didn’t wanna just rewrite what i’ve already done so it took me a while to figure out how I should go about it and then it got super hectic at work and I’ve only managed like 3 days off in the last month so long story short, its been a Time.

But I felt like this is a bit of an angle I haven’t done yet. It kinda follows on from another fic I have (Part 1: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28674324 and Part 3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28674324/chapters/74814246 ) but you shouldn’t need to read that one to get this one (I hope) so I hope you can enjoy it and I realise the actual request isn’t in it but I will be doing a second (or third if you’ve read the first one) part with a little smut. I just realise it’s been a long time and didn’t want to make it longer.

Anyway, thank you for your request! Enjoy the first half!

‘I cant’t do anything right.’

By the time Dick had let himself into the Tower that evening, it was purely the power of God that got him through the door. It had been a long night on patrol and his body was really feeling the effects of it.

He ignored the ever present dull throb in this chest as he crossed the threshold and hung his jacket and backpack on the coat stand.

It had been 5 years since Kory’s death and although managing it had gotten easier, the pain was still as fresh as if it had happened yesterday. It had taken him a while after her death to get his head on straight; a few years of a while. It wasn’t until Donna essentially hosted an intervention that had felt the need to kick himself into shape.

‘Is this what Kory would have wanted for you?’ She had said, pity coating her words.

And she was right. Dick had become nothing but a disgusting shadow of his former self, and Kory would have been ashamed of him. So he had begun therapy, upon Donna’s suggestion, and slowly but surely returned to the leader the team all needed.

His heart still clenched every time he saw something that he knew she would have loved and the holidays were always difficult but it now felt like he could survive day to day without her physical presence.

He always made sure that it was clear that although Kory wasn’t with them physically, her spirit was always present in their life. And he honestly believed it was. Whenever he was having a difficult day and he would get a comforting whiff of her perfume, there was something in him that knew it was her doing it. He wasn’t sure when the time had come where any memory of her stopped feeling like a personal attack on him, but he was glad it had happened. There was no way he could continue to exist the way he was. Slogging through each day with no end in sight; every reminder of her setting him on fire.

Now, it finally felt like he was healing.

It was 2am before Dick had finished his nighttime routine and his head hit the pillow but the sensation couldn’t have been more welcome. It wasn’t long before his mind began to switch off and he fell into unconsciousness...

Dick opened his eyes to find himself in the middle of his childhood kitchen. The sudden nostalgic surroundings had his heartbeat drumming in his ears.

He scanned the room briefly, landing on a figure sat at the distressed oak table that sent his heart rate thumping so fast, it would probably be heard as a hum. Although she had her back to him, he would recognise the cloud of scarlet curls even if he’d been blindfolded.

He felt his knees give way as they buckled to the ground, the cold tile thwacking against them but he never felt the pain come.

‘Kory?’ Her name came out as a breath of disbelief.

Dick watched as she rose from the table and turned to face him. He felt as if everything was suspended in the air as he gazed on her face for the first time in 5 years. Liquid sprung to his eyes as he observed her, her frame becoming distorted by the tears. He quickly blinked to get rid of them, not willing to give up the sight of her.

‘Hello, Richard.’

He felt a sob bubble up from the sound of her melodic voice.

She wore a strappy blackcurrant, chiffon, floor length gown and she’d never looked so beautiful. She could have been wearing a bin bag for all he cared and looked just as beautiful.

‘Wh-what-’ He swallowed. Where could he even begin?

‘Come sit with me.’

She swished over to him appearing to glide in slow motion. He felt his heart shoot through the ceiling as he felt her fingers slide through his own and she led him leisurely to the oak table before she made her way to sit on her own chair. She folded her arms on the table, saying nothing as she merely looked at him, a soft smile gracing her face. Dick had never felt a silence so intensely.

‘What’s happening?’ He asked, the ability to speak coming to him as a surprise.

‘It’s a long story.’ She waved his question off casually, as if this was an everyday occurrence. ‘Aren’t you happy to see me?’

‘Of course!’ He reached forward to clutch her hands. ‘I’m just-.’

‘Confused.’ She interrupted. ‘I know.’

Dick felt the distant flash of irritation he always got when she interrupted him, his throat tightening at the long missed emotion.

‘Well, aren’t you going to show me around?’ She deflected, her eyes twinking in a way that made his stomach churn.

She stood to make her way to the framed picture of a 5 year old him holding a crab as his mother stood behind him that sat on the granite countertops. Dick felt a familiar, separate pang in his chest at the sight of the photograph. The picture encapsulated one of his favourite days; he couldn’t remember a time where he’d laughed more than he had that day.

‘What’s the story behind this one?’ She questioned, picking it up with a gentle grin.

Dick had a funny suspicion he had already relayed the events of that particular day to her before but he simply sighed and began to regale her with the story of how he had gotten bitten by a crab.

‘Um yeah, it was a trip to the beach. We had a really good day actually -’

‘Dick.’

He was interrupted by Kory who placed the photograph back onto the counter and came to stand in front of him. She grasped both of his hands in hers and pulled him up so they stood toe to toe.

‘Relax, please.’ She told him, releasing one of his hands to cup his cheek.

Though he revelled in the feel of her lithe fingers against his skin, he still couldn’t quite believe what was happening.

‘How can I relax, Kory?’ He asked rhetorically. ‘I have no idea what’s happening. Am I asleep? Cos this feels like a little more than just a dream. You feel so real but yet I’m afraid to touch you in case you disappear.’

The hand that was still on Dick’s came up to join the other so his face was bracketed in her palms.

‘I’m here with you, Richard.’ She said with conviction. ‘I’m not going to disappear. For now, at least, okay?’

‘How do you know?’

‘Because I just do.’ A mischievous glint appeared in her eye. ‘Kiss me, if you don’t believe me.’

Dick felt his heart lighten, just as she’d intended it to but he couldn’t stop the sliver of skepticism that pulled at him. Still, he figured whatever was going to happen couldn’t have been worse than the 5 years he’d already experienced.

So, he wrapped his arms around her waist and did as she’d asked. However, instead of being met with the low buzz of his alarm clock, sure enough, it was Kory’s lips that he had met. The velvety feel of her lips under his own had him feeling like he could have burst into song. Forgotten were the last 5 years of disappointing early mornings and soulless late nights.

All he could be was there with her.

His skin blazed with heat as Kory’s arms travelled up his own and across his chest to land at his shoulders, her fingers sifting through the hair at the nape of his neck. The gentle tug she gave it prompted a gentle moan but left Dick feeling bereft when she pulled away from the kiss slowly to peer at him through glazed eyes.

‘I’ve missed you so much, Dick.’ Her voice sounded thick with emotion. ‘So much.’

Dick felt his own throat tighten.

‘I missed you too.’ Never had truer words been spoken. ‘You have no idea how much I’ve missed you. I’m so sorry, Kory. I’m sorry I let you go. I’m sorry I-’

‘Don’t worry about that now.’ She told him, her eyes shining with intensity. ‘Just kiss me.’

He didn’t need to be told twice.

#dickkory #titans #dick grayson #koriand'r #kory anders #au #dickkory fanfiction

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zmayadw · 4 years ago

Text

Evening all :)

Alrighty, lets continue with the story :)

Wish you all a nice evening!

CALL OF THE RAVEN

PART 19

The next few days i bussied myself working, Jake doing his thing. We barely talked, every effort of his to start a conversation with me ended quickly. I hated myself for doing this to him, but i wasnt up for anything. I turned my phone off, but he took it and turned it back on, saying he will take care of it. Me? I just wanted a few days of peace without those fricking calls messing with my mind. So i had my headphones on, loosing myself in the music, focusing on my work. I saw, ofcourse, when the calls occured, frustration growing at him for yet another failure at locating the call. The close4st he got to it, was that the calls came from within Duskwood. But that meant as little as nothing.

On the morning of the third day, things wernt much different. Coffee was waiting for me when i woke up. I took a shower, taking the coffee, giving Jake a quick kiss, moving back to bed. He still looked worried, the rings arround his eyes starting to show. But he didnt force me to anythig, he just left me be. I took my headphones, the sound of music making me forget the world arround me. I was lost in my work, when i noticed Jake standing next to the bed, handing me my phone. I took the headphones off. „It's Jessy.“ He said, „She's calling for the third time allready.“ He looked at me pleadingly, and i sighed taking the phone from him. „Hello, Jessy.“ „Finaly!“ her cheerful voice chimed from the other side. „Trying to get ahold of you is tougher then trying to call the pope himself!“ she laughed. „Haha, very funny.“ I said, sounding a bit sassy. „Oh my, who stepped on your toe?“ Jessy replied a bit hurt at my sassiness. Jake looked at me intensly, and i cursed for snaping at her. „Im sorry, Jessy“ i started appologetically, she didnt deserve this. „Been feeling a bit 'under the weather' lately, its no excuse to snap at you.“ „No worries, Maya, i understand.“ She said. „Even more of a reason you need some fun!“ she chimed. „Put me on speaker, i want to talk to both of you.“ „Uhm, alright.“ I said, lowering my phone, putting her on speaker, Jake looking puzzled at me. I just shook my shoulders at him, having no clue whats this all about. „Alright, you're on speaker, go on.“ I told her. „Good! Hello, Jake, by the way.“ She said cheerfuly. „Hello, Jessy.“ He answered. „Now, you two are comming later to Dan's place for babrecue and to hang out.“ She chimed from the speaker.“And dont try to make an excuse why you cant, i dont wanna hear it!“ she said stern. „Be here arround 4. And ill text you Dans address later.“ She didnt let us say anything „Allrigh, thats settled then. See you two later.“ She chimmed, adding before she hung up „Oh, and Jake, let Maya breath a bit!“ she said teasingly, making Jake rise his eyebrow at the phone, and me smiling at it. „Later you two.“ „Finaly.“ Jake said as i lovered my phone down. „Huh?“ i looked confused at him. „You smiled.“

I was sitting on the bed putting my sneakers on. Jake was taking his laptop and some other things from the desk, stuffing it all in his backpack, along with my phone. „You're taking all that with you?“ i asked. He turned to me „Well, i want to be ready, in case of..“ he trailed off, and i finished „In case of any new calls.“ My mood darkened again. Jake came to me, crouching infront of me. „Maya, i know this is frustrating“ He took my hands in his. „But i cant help if you turn your phone off and ignore the calls.“ He looked so tired again, and worried, his eyes dark, matching my mood. I hated it. Everything was starting all over again. But this time it was me that was most affected by it all. I sighed „I know, you're right, but its eating at me inside, Jake. It feels like darknes is creeping at me, slowly taking all the joy and happines away.“ My words made his eyes look even darker, his face showing all this was hard on him as much as it was on me. He lowered his head on my knees, and i ran my hand through his hair. „Its killing me to see you like this.“ He said it so desperatly, my heart squeezed. „Hey“ i said softly, making him look at me. „I'll be fine.“ I wished we could just run away somewhere, leave all this behind, forget the world exists. But with my luck, shit would follow no matter where i go. I smiled at him „ We should go. Or Jessy might send SWATs if we dont show up on time.“ He smiled at it, getting up, pulling me from the bed „Lets go.“

We walked in silence to Dan's place, each lost in our own thoughts. As much as i didnt want to go, maybe this would be exactly what i needed. And I was happy i'd see Jessy, her cheerfulness would be welcoming. We stopped at one of te houses, Jake announcig we're here. It was smaller,a single storey, but i found it the perfect size. It had a nice big back yard, grass neatly mowed and fence trimmed. We came to the front door, Jake ringing the bell. Dan opened it grinning at us „Whoa“ he said „Who got you two in such a 'good mood'? You look like shit!“ „Gee, thanks Dan, again, thats exactly what i wanted to hear.“ I told him, Jake silently standing beside me. „Aww, Maya“ Dan started „Like you dont know me by now. I always say it as it is.“ He grined at us, and i chuckled „Unfortunaly, i'm aware of it.“ „Well, come on in, Jessy is already impatiante waiting on you to show up.“ He ushered us in. „Just continue straight to the kitchen“ Dan instructed me. I entered the kitche, Jake and Dan following. Jessy smiled at seeing us, running to me for a hug „Finaly! I was worried i would have to send Dan to get you!“ she said cheerfuly. „I dont doubt you'd do it!“ i said, letting her go. She turned to Jake now, hugging him. He was surprised by it, looking all fidgety, not knowing what to do. He hugged her back akwardly, and i chuckled. Jessy let go of him, noticing him being uncomfortable. She winked at him „Oh, dont worry, Jake, i dont bite.“ I couldnt keep it anymore, so i laughed. It was Dan that came to his rescue, patting him on the back, „Dont scare the poor guy, babe. Rather give him a beer.“ Jessy grined at Dan, turning to the fridge, grabbing two beers, handing them to Jake and Dan. Jake took a sip, calming his nerves „Im not scared.“ he said, turning to Jessy, still being a bit uncomfortable. „Dont worry, man“ Dan said to him in his dramatic way „I get you, she can be scarry sometimes.“ Jessy looked at Dan furiously, throwing a rag at him, as he stuck his toung out at her running to the other room. Jake chuckled at it, but she looked at him all serious, making him avert his look, taking another sip of the beer. She turned to me „Want some wine?“ „That'd be great.“ I told her smiling. She poured a glass and handed it to me. „Oh for the love of it!“ Dans voice ringed from the other room. I looked at Jessy questionably. She sighed „He is trying for the last hour to connect the outside speakers so we can have some music in the back yard. Unsucessfully, as you might notice.“ Jake said „I'll go help.“ Jessy smiled at him. „Thank you!“ „Hey, i dont wanna stay here to test that theory about you biting.“ He grined at her, leaving the kitchen to join Dan. Jessys eyes opened in bewilderement, turning to me „Did he just joke?“ I chuckled at her „He's getting better at it.“ We both laughed. She got back to finish the salad she was doing when we came. „Can i help with anything?“ I asked „No, you just sit and relax, i'll join you any minute.“ I sat at the table, taking a sip of my wine. Few minutes passed, when music was heard through the open doors leading to the back yard from the kitchen. „Finaly!“ Jessy exclimed cheerfully. „Thank you, Jake!“ She yelled. „No worries.“ He yelled back. „Hey, i helped, too!“ Dan yelled sounding offended. „Ofcourse you did.“ She yelled back sarcasticly, making me laugh again. She came joining me at the table. „So, how are you, Maya?“ she asked. „I've been better.“ I answered honestly. „I'm tired, Jessy.“ I sighed „All thats happening is becoming too much on me. I feel like im drowning, and at the same time i feel numb.“ She looked at me concerned. „I'm barely keeping it together. If it wasnt for Jake..“ i trailed off. He really was the one keeping all this madness of mine at bay. „He is worried about you.“ Jessy said, hesitating for a moment before she continued. „He called me yesterday.“ „He did?“ i asked surprised. „He was desperate, Maya. He had no idea what to do, it was eating him alive. He told me what happened. He begged me to help, mumbling something like he let you down. I barely managed to calm

him.“ „Shit.“ I said, lowering my head on the table. „I never tought I might make him feel that way.“ I looked back at Jessy „I would crumble to pieces long ago without him.“ „I know that, Maya.“ Jessy squeezed my hand. „Just talk to him, dont shut yourself out.“ She smiled softly at me. I smiled back, going to her for a hug „Thank you, Jessy. You are the only one beside him that can pull me back on my feet again.“ „Im here for you, i told you that before, and i mean it, Maya.“ She said to me hugging me tighter. We pulled apart and she got up. „What are they doing in there? They should be out in the back already!“ she exclimed, moving to the doors of the next room where Dan and Jake wer. „Dan Anderson!“ she yelled from the doors. I joined her, laughing at the scene in front of me – Dan and Jake wer sitting on the floor playing a game. Boys will be boys, right? „If you dont put down that controller and get your ass out in the yard right now, i swear to God...“ Dan tensed and jumped up in a heartbeat at her words „Yes ma'am!“ Jake chuckled at Dan, but Jessy turned to him now „Hey, hackerboy, dont you laugh, you're joining him!“ Jake was up on his feet even faser then Dan, and they both started walking reluctantly out of the room. Dan passed us, but suddenly turned to me. „Hey, how come she can call him 'hackerboy', but you go beserk when i do it?“ he asked being dramatic again. I smirked at him „She can call him whatever she wants.“ Jessy burst out laughing. I turned to Jake going for a kiss. I whispered to him before i moved „I just said it because im scared of her myself.“ Jake laughed at it, quickly kissing me once more, going after Dan.

Jessy lowered a cup of coffee in front of me, going back to sit. We stayed in the back yard after eating, dusk slowly setteling in, the sky in multiple colors. It felt calming. At the end, I was glad we came, i needed this after everything that was happening. Even if the sight of my phone on the table in front of Jake did make me feel uneasy, i decided to ignore it. I had to pull it together. I couldnt let this shit get into my head so intensly, or I would definatly go insane. And learning from Jessy that Jake was affected by it so much, just made me more determined at it. It was Dan who broke the silence, bringing the tention at the table. „So, Maya, are we gonna talk about those calls and everything now?“ Jessy shot him an angry look, Dan not paying attention to it. „No, we are not.“ Jake said calmly, before i could even speak, a hint of frustration noticeable in his voice. „O really? And why not?“ Dan asked lookin at Jake fiercly. „Because, it doesnt concern you.“ Jake told him, returning equaly fierce look. „Whoa, you fucking kidding me, man?“ Dan said, raising his voice „It most definatly concern me.“ „And why the fuck is that?“ Jake hissed back at him, frustration rising up at him. Jessy was silent, and so was I. There goes a nice evening, i tought to myself. „Because“ Dan started, hising back „I consider Maya to be my friend, so if she is in trouble and needs help, im here for her.“ „She doesn't need your help, she's got me for that.“ Jake was already on the edge of loosing control, but Dan didnt care. He snorted „You mean like last time?“ „Dan, i'm warning you...“ Jake told him, barely containing himself. „Dan, stop it!.“ Jessy begged him. „No, I wont stop.“ He told her, being agitated more and more now. My head began to puls, all this was going too far now. „Dan, dont.“ I pleaded, but he barely spared me a look. „He wasnt here when shit hit the fan last time, Jessy, I was! We were, not him!“ Jake tensed for a second at Dans words, pounding his fists so hard on the table „You fucking moron, dont you think i wouldnt have been here if i could?!“ He was furious now, i had to interfere before this escalates for the worst. „Enough!“ I shouted, shooting up from my chair. They both looked at me surprised, but still furious. „Thank you, Jake, but i think i can speak for myself. The question was dirrected at me, after all.“ i told him, rubbing at the side of my head with one hand. He slouched in his chair, stung by my words. Dan smirked, but i turned to him „And you, you know damn right why he couldnt be here, you have no right rubbing it to his face like that!“ He fel silent at that. „Now, if you two are done with this 'cock fight', great, we can discuss it like civilized people. Otherwise, both of you can go to hell!“ I sat back, my head still pulsing, all looking astonished at me. No one spoke for what felt like eternity, Dan finaly breaking the silence again „I'm sorry, Maya. I didnt want for this to happen.“ He said, looking apologetically.“What i wanted to say, to try and make Jake here realize once and for all, is that we are here to help.“ He turned to Jake now, all that rage from before replaced with sympathy „Damn it, man, i have no clue what kind of 'friends' you had in your life so far, but you gotta learn to trust people and let them help.“ I took Jakes hand in mine, and he looked at me „Dan is right.“ I told him softly „And you know it.“ He sighed. He wasnt used to this, looking to others for help. He always relayed only on himself, but it was time for a change. He turned to Dan. „I apologize...for calling you a moron.“ I squeezed his hand, him bringing it up to his face, landing a soft kiss on it. Dan looked back at him, still serious „You mean 'fucking moron'?“ We all turned to look at him, and i tought all will start going downhill again. But then Dan grinned, Jessy hitting him on a shoulder for messing with us. I shook my head, smile appearing on my face. Dan extended his hand toward Jake „Look, man, i meant it, if you need help with anything, dont hesitate.“ Jake looked at him for a moment, accepting

Dans hand in a tight grip „Thanks.“ Jessy grinned at them, saying teasingly „Aww, i think this is the beginning of a beautifull friendship!“ I burst out laughing, Jessy joining me. Both Dan and Jake looked at us in disbelief, when Jake turned to Dan „I think i need another beer.“ Dan looked at him, nodding his head in agreement „You and me both, man. C'mon.“ He gestured for him to follow, as Jessy and me laughed even harder.

After all the tension, the rest of our evening was quite entertaining. Jake felt more realxed, but still got uncofortable at Jessy's openness and teasing. And him and Dan getting along after everything was welcoming. It was pretty late when the two of us said our goodbyes and left. The streets wer silent, only our footsteps echoing as we walked towards motel. Sleep was slowly getting at me, and i shivered from the nights chill. Jake threw his hand arround me, pulling me closer to him, his vicinity making me feel warmer instantly, and I leaned my head on his shoulder. „Thank you.“ I told him after a while. „What for?“ „For tonight.“ I said, smiling. „I had fun. It was exactly what I needed.“ „It was....interesting.“ He said. I chuckled „ Dont worry, i'll talk to Jessy to go easy on you in the future.“ He laughed „Thanks. I'll get used to her,eventually.“ I got serious „She told me, by the way. What you did.“ He tensed at it a bit. „Its fine, Jake.“ I said. He was silent, but I knew he was still bothered by it all. „Hey, talk to me.“ I said. He pulled away from me, putting his hands in his pockets. „Its just..I mean.. never mind.“ I stopped in place, Jake making few more steps before turning to me. „Jake, please.“ I said softly. He got agitated again. He was silent for a moment more. „Fuck it“ he said, raising his voice in frustration “I wasnt enouhg, Maya!“ „What are you talking about?“ I asked confused. He sighed and sat on the floor, leaning his hands on his knees. I came and sat infront of him. He looked desperately at me „I wasnt enough. I couldnt help you. I've let you down, again.“ My heart ached so much, it pained me to see him like this. „Jake, you didnt let me down. And you did help me.“ He snorted „You sure about that?“ „Yes“ I said, smiling at him. „Dont you get it, it was exactly what Dan was refering to earlier.“ „What do you mean?“ he asked. „What I mean , Jake, is that sometimes you need another helping hand.“ He still wasnt convinced. „But i'm suppose to take care of you, me Maya. To keep you safe, to make it all better. And i cant even do that right!“ „Jake, I would crumble to pieces long ago without you.“ i said softly „You make all this bearable for me. You are my light in all this darkness. So please, stop doubting yourself.“ He sighed „Easier said then done.“ I got up, extending my hands for him, smiling softly „Then, let me be your 'helping hand', I promise to take all that doubt away.“ He just stared at me for a while, before he took my hands, letting me pull him up. He leaned his forehead to mine and hugged me. „You are amazing, have I told you that already?“ I smiled „You might have, but pleast, dont ever stop.“ He chuckled and kissed me „Thank you“ he said, as the kiss ended. „For?“ i asked. „For being the way you are.“

We continued towards motel, hugged once again. I hoped my words eased his mind. Him opening to me more was a welcoming step forward, but still, much of the work to be done here. There was practically nothing I knew about his life before we met, and honestly, i wasnt sure how much of it I wanted to know, as much as I might be curious about it. I never asked him, and he rarely said anything of it. I knew that currently he was 'doing stuff' for someone, allowing him to be here freely. And I did tell him i'm ok with it, and that I trust him, wich i do, completely. But there was constant fear in me that things might turn for the worst again. With my toughts wondering off like that, i didnt realize we wer in front of motel room. Jake was about to put the key in the lock, stopping abruptly. „Jake?“ i asked worriedly, as he pulled my phone from his pocket. Another call. He set it earlier to vibrate, so no wonder I didnt hear it. He was about to answer when i stopped his hand „Dont.“ I said, looking pleadingly at him. „Maya..“ he said softly. „Please, Jake, just dont“ i said, sounding tired. I sighed „Just this one time, let it be. Give me just this one night, please, to feel normal again.“ I let go of his hand. The phone continued to vibrate, then stopped. „Thank you.“ I said relieved. He turned back to the doors, letting us enter. He went to the desk, taking his stuff back on it from the backpack. „I know we should have answered it.“ I said, standing next to bed, taking my sneakers off. „But i just wanted to go to sleep tonight with a smile, not worry and frustration.“ Jake walked to me putting his hands around my waist. „Well, i know of one way you can get rid off some of that frustration.“ He raised an eyebrow at me, his eyes sparkling. „Oh really?“ i asked. I turned us, so his back was facing the bed, and pushed him on it, situating myself on him. I intertwined my fingers with his on both hands, moving our now joined hands abowe his head. I leand to him as i did it, stopping my face just an inch from his. „Are you sure you want this?“ i asked teasingly. „I still have much of the previous frustration in me, it could last a while.“ His eyes flared at my words. He roled me on my back, our hands now above my head. He released one hand, moving it down my body, that flare in his eyes intensifying with every heartbeat. My whole body trembled with my own desire under his touch. He kissed me so fiercly, and said with a heavy breath as he broke our kiss „Good.“

#duskwood fanfic #duskwood jake #duskwood mc #duskwood jessy #duskwood dan

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2-cute-4-school · 4 years ago

Text

Fatum

Group : NCT

Pairing : Park Jisung x gn!Reader

Genre : fluff, a bit of angst in the beginning

Word count : 2K words | M.list

‘A fire that could burn down the entire world, but could never touch you.’

Before finally asking you out, you and Jisung had been friends for years. You always concluded that the time you’ve spent together was when you felt most alive, feeling your erratic heartbeat against your rib cage or the heat rising to your cheeks and forming a pink hue that spread across your face. Your bond with Jisung was so pure, like a modern fairy tale, a budding love story blossoming shyly under the soothing moonlight.

You told each other everything, every secret, every hidden truth you were too scared to reveal to the rest of the world. You trusted Jisung with your heart and in turn, he gifted you his on a silver plate. Despite the years spent attached at the hip, you still cherished every moment spent together, relishing in the other’s presence. So when you didn’t turn up at school one day, without a word to him or any of your other friends, he had every right to boil with worry.

“Look, I’m worried too, Jisung, but if you don’t stop bouncing your leg I’ll cut it off, don’t try me.”

Jisung forced himself to stop at Chenle’s hissed demand, but not even a minute later it resumed its action. Chenle sighed gravely beside him.

“We’ll go over after school, just stop already.”

“I just don’t get it. We always tell each other if something comes up.”

“I’m sure you’re thinking too much, it’s not good for your brain, you’re using it too much at a time.”

Chenle’s joke didn’t seem to light up his friend’s mood as he continued to stare blankly at the messy notes scribbled across the pages of his notebook. The doodles on the desks, made with your Sharpie seemed to glare back at Jisung, burning holes through the worn-out wood they decorated.

“Try to survive a few more hours without your sweetie pie, honeybunch, sugar plum.” Chenle’s tone was sickeningly sweet and Jisung couldn’t help but roll his eyes.

“Shut up, Chenle, not my fault your love life is drier than my grandma’s skin.”

Chenle gasped dramatically before slapping Jisung’s shoulder in fake hurt.

School hours seemed to drag on for longer than usual without your presence. Jisung dragged himself through class after class, his mind wandering the entire day to the visit he owed you as soon as school finished. Jisung swore the moment the bell rang, signifying the end of his last period, he bolted from his seat so fast the room spun for a few seconds. He barely had it in himself to wait for Chenle in front of the gate, shifting his weight anxiously from one foot to the other as he waited for his friend. He had to admit that patience wasn’t one of his virtues, but Chenle should have known that already when he decided to make him wait in such a situation. As soon as he was close enough, Jisung grabbed him, dragging him through the sea of tired teenagers, cursing at their teachers and homework.

“Slow down, slow down, Jisung.”

Of course his words fell on deaf ears as Jisung only seemed to speed up his pace and by the time they arrived in front of your house Chenle was already panting, leaning his hands on his knees, but Jisung didn’t spare him a single glance as he approached the door and rand the bell, hoping to see your face as soon as the door cracked open.

“So much for keeping fit.” Chenle grunted out before moving to stand by Jisung’s side.

They heard shuffling from inside and the doorknob turned downwards a moment later, allowing them to come face to face with your mother, whose tired features morphed into a soft smile at the sight of the boys. They both greeted her politely and before Jisung could ask about you, your mother beat him to it.

“Hello, kids, come in, I thought you might come around.”

She moved away from the entryway, allowing them to step inside the familiar house and take their shoes off before following your mother in your living room and sitting down on one of the sofas. Jisung pursed his lips, used to you skipping cheerfully as soon as you heard the door opening, knowing that it could only be them coming over. Instead, he was met with silence this time which unnerved him even further.

“Y/N hasn’t been feeling well.”

The boys’ heads snapped towards your mom, concern washing over their features. Their eyes ran over her stance, slouched over with dark bags under her eyes, they could tell she probably wasn’t sleeping well and stayed up to watch over you.

“I thought it would be better by now, but the fever isn’t going away. They’ve been in and out of it for a while. A doctor came over earlier and assured us that we can treat it from home, but if things don’t go well soon, we should go to the hospital.”

“Since when?”

Jisung’s voice wavered, worry settling deep down in his chest. You hadn’t told him anything about not feeling well so a twinge of hurt swiveled around, tickling his wavering heart.

“The fever appeared yesterday evening, but it was mild. It progressed overnight.”

Jisung fiddled with his fingers, torn by the desire to see you, to put out the fire in his soul, soothe the storm in his soul with just the sight of you. Chenle looked over at Jisung who was lost deep in between his jumbled thoughts and spoke up on account of both himself and his friend.

“Can we please go in?” He motioned towards your door, enlarging his eyes and jutting out his bottom lip at the sight of your mother considering his ask. The question seemed to also snap Jisung out of his frenzy.

“Please, we won’t take long.”

Your mother still hesitated, worried about the boys also getting sick, but once she met their pleading gazes she could only let out a sigh.

“Alright, I guess a quick visit won’t hurt.”

“Yes! Thank you!”

They both jumped up from their seats, turning towards the hallway leading to your room with rushed steps.

“And Jisung!”

Said boy stopped in his tracks at the mention of his name, craning his neck to look back at your mom who regarded his with a playful smile.

“No smooches today.”

His face heated up faster than he could turn back around as he stumbled over his words in an attempt to mumble out a reply. His ears were bright red, forming a contrast with Chenle’s hand that reached out to grip at them gently as the older boy let out a snort.

“Don’t worry, Mrs. Y/L/N, not on my watch.”

Your mother let out a quiet chuckle as she retreated back into the kitchen, leaving the boys to their business. Jisung didn’t hesitate to twist the knob of your door and push it open, but he almost regretted it when his eyes landed on you. It wasn’t the first time he had seen you sick, of course not, but never to this extent. His heart fell and it felt as if he stepped on it with every stride he took forward. As he neared your bed, he felt all of his happiness drained from him. You looked so frail, paler than your usual healthy skin tone. You seemed to be sleeping, but it was anything but peaceful, a frown furrowing your eyebrows together, your fingers twitching from time to time.

Jisung shakily sat down on the edge of your bed, afraid that if he jostled you too much you would break into pieces right under his fingertips. He brushed his hand against yours, curling protectively around your freezing own, despite the sweat shining on your forehead. He wouldn’t admit it out loud, but Jisung was scared out of his mind seeing you like that.

The light of the sun shimming its way through the clouds seemed to fade even further away and the colors splayed around your room didn’t seem nearly as bright in Jisung’s eyes. The world looked duller from his point of view, paling at the same time as you, leaving him behind with a stuttering heart.

He barely acknowledged Chenle striding up to you too, his eyes fixed on your frame, too scared that if he dared to move away his eyes, you would vanish right before him like sand in the wind. Chenle threaded his fingers slowly through your hair, pushing away the loose strands covering your face and regarded you with soft eyes. Your frown seemed to diminish as you recognized the presence of your boys even while buried deep in your fever dream.

“Their lips are dried, where’s the water bottle?”

Chenle shuffled around for a bit, one of his hands never leaving your head as he stroked your hair gently in an unconscious attempt to lessen your pain. He bent down to pick the bottle once he located it but sighed at the sight of it almost empty.

“I’ll go fill it up, stay here.”

Jisung merely nodded at his words, his full attention never leaving you. His thumb caressed the skin of your knuckles, trying to somehow show you he was there, right beside you, loving you unconditionally and waiting for you just like a puppy waits for its owner with nothing but loyalty and unadulterated fondness.

He sighed and attempted to sit up and bring your chair in order to rather sit down on it than supposedly squeeze in beside you on the side of your bed, but he froze as he felt your shaky but firm grip on his index finger. He stared in awe at the way your fist curled around his large finger, his hand dwarfing yours, reminding him of the way a baby holds onto their parent when unsettled.

His once faltering heart burst with overwhelming affection for you at your small action. The way you held onto him as if he was your lifeline, as if his presence could cure everything and shoo your pain away. Jisung let a grin spread across his face for the first time since he had arrived at school that day, lowering his forehead bashfully to rest atop your intertwined hands. as he cradled them with his other one, engulfing them.

“Oh my God.”

He couldn’t even put into words how much you affected him, the way you could play him on your little finger and he would be too caught up with loving you to ever complain. Warmth spread into his whole body, sparkles running across his skin delightfully and lighting up another fire in his heart. A fire that could burn down the entire world, but could never touch you, just the way he would stand through anything as long as he had you. He let out a breathy chuckle, in disbelief at himself for only realizing now just how whipped he was for you.

“Oh my God, Y/N, you can’t do this to me now when you’re sick.”

He littered kisses anywhere in his reach, soft like a butterfly brushed against your exposed skin. Jisung nuzzled his nose in your crooked palm, seeking out the familiar feeling of your skin pressed against his. He needed you the way he needed oxygen, the way a swallow needs its wings to feel the wind threading through its feathers and leading it to freedom. He needed you unconditionally, not even a breath in between the two of you.

“Get better soon, baby. Come back to me so I can love you properly.”

Jisung pressed a long kiss to the back of your hand, still gripping his finger firmly, grounding yourself. His lips lingered over the cold skin that slowly warmed up due to his touch, brushing it as he spoke to you in hushed tones, promising you the moon and the stars as nothing mattered to him other than having you back in his arms, healthy and smiling.

And in that moment, with your fates knotted together, Jisung swore he would hold onto you until his last breath.

#cznnet #nct fluff #nct dream #nct imagines #nct jisung #nct angst #nct scenarios #nct dream imagines #nct dream fluff #nct jisung fluff #nct jisung angst #nct jisung scenarios #nct jisung imagines

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artificialqueens · 4 years ago

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Hold Me Tighter (Even Closer), Chapter 8 (Branjie, Jankie) - Joley

ao3

Chapter Summary: More people talk some sense into Jackie, then Jackie finally talks to Jan. Meanwhile, the adoption process continues for Brooke Lynn and Vanessa.

Jackie had recovered after the initial breakdown. She had the wherewithal to realize she might have overreacted a bit, but the emotions she felt, the hurt she had, it was real. And she was eternally grateful for Brooke Lynn and Vanessa for helping her through it.

But now she was left in limbo, in a purgatory of her creation. It was hard enough for her to admit to herself that she had developed romantic feelings for Jan, acting on them was a whole other story. And it frustrated the hell out of her. She’s smart. She’s articulate. If she had a point to make, everyone in the room would receive the message loud and clear.

And yet, even thinking about Jan made her tongue-tied. She felt like she was back in high school with a hopeless crush. Though, she never had sex with any of her crushes. Further unlike past crushes, she knew she had to do something about it. She had spent a couple of days spitballing plans, either alone or with Brooke and Vanessa, but nothing seemed to be the one.

“You know none of this would’ve happened if you just talked to her in the first place, right?” Jaida asked after having been caught up on her friend’s romantic turmoil.

Jackie rolled her eyes and absentmindedly stirred her coffee as she spoke. “Yes, Jaida. I know none of this would’ve happened if I had been upfront with my feelings. Happy?”

“Admitting it is the first step,” she nodded simply.

“Great,” she retorted flatly, then paused to sip from her mug. “Then what’s step two? That’s kind of where I’m stuck at.”

Jaida strummed her fingers against the table as she thought. “Have you talked to this Nicky girl? Not like in a catfight kinda way but just to get the tea on what’s happening between them or whatever.”

Jackie blinked, then furrowed her brows. She hadn’t thought of that at all – to an extent, it seemed like that would be a complete overstep and only make things worse. But on the other, it couldn’t hurt to simply clear the air, right? “You think it’ll help?”

“I think it’s worth a shot. And if not, please make sure someone films the catfight, ‘cause I’d pay good money to see that shit.”

Jackie had spent the better part of the day thinking about it, weighing out the pros and cons. She eventually came to the conclusion that Jaida was right, it was better to know where everyone stood before she made any moves with Jan. On top of that, she knew she had to act fast, the fear that if she didn’t, Jan could easily move on with Nicky if she wanted to.

And the thought of that made Jackie’s heart ache - the thought that all of this emotional turmoil could be all for naught if Jan ended up choosing someone else. The worst part of that was knowing she would only have herself to blame if that happened.

But all of her emotions had to fall to the wayside if she wanted to have a calm discussion with Nicky. Her heart was pounding as she approached her, though she did her damndest not to let it show. “Hey… It’s Nicky, right? You have a minute?”

“Oh, I should have seen this coming,” Nicky chuckled softly. “Of course I do. May I be so bold as to assume this is about Jan?”

Jackie rubbed the back of her neck awkwardly. She supposed she should have anticipated Nicky recognizing her and putting two and two together. “Well… Yes.”

Nicky shook her head as she sat down at the table, gesturing for Jackie to join her. “Before you ask, Jan and I are not dating. Our relationship is strictly sexy friendship. Don’t get me wrong, she’s lovely, but I have a strict ‘no dating before graduation’ policy. Personally, I don’t want anything getting in the way of a proper university life experience, if you know what I mean.”

Listening to Nicky was a lot more reassuring than Jackie had anticipated. She took solace in knowing this unfairly beautiful girl wasn’t a romantic rival. “So… You and Jan are friends with benefits, not dating, because you’re not interested in dating,” she nodded slowly. “But does she…”

“Fancy me?” Nicky finished, then shook her head. “Not in that way. I think I am a comfort to her. And I do not mind that role. Plus, to be completely honest, I believe she has the feelings for you.”

Jackie blinked rapidly, her heart skipping a beat and her brain momentarily short-circuiting. “You do? What, um, what makes you think that?”

Nicky shrugged. “She wanted to make you jealous. To me, you only try to get that reaction out of someone you have romantic interest with,” she explained. “She tries not to talk about you often, but when she does… there is something there.”

“Oh,” she cleared her suddenly dry throat, a smile tugging at the corners of her lips. “That’s good to know.”

“At the risk of overstepping, though that’s never stopped me before, I think you should tell her,” she said. “Seems like you’ve got a lot to work out. Lot of messy feelings.”

Jackie chuckled awkwardly. “You’re not the first person to say that. Not even the first person to say that today. Guess I really don’t have a choice, huh?”

“You always have a choice,” Nicky replied. “But I think you know which one to make.”

——

“You seem a lot more calm lately,” Gigi observed. “But distracted. What’s on your mind?”

Jan shrugged, picking at her plate with her fork, pushing her food around and only occasionally taking a bite. “I don’t know… I tend to worry that maybe I’m putting too much focus on my romantic life. Everything else is going well, but it kind of feels like a house of cards, you know?”

Gigi furrowed her brows. “It kind of sounds like you’re looking for something to worry about to avoid dealing with your actual problems.”

“Maybe,” she sighed. “I’m just waiting for… I don’t know, some sort of sign.” Before she could say anything else, her phone went off. “That was a little too on the nose…”

Despite her suspicions, she asked, “Who is it?”

Jan looked up from her phone. “It’s Jackie. She wants to know if I’m free tonight.”

“Which you are,” Gigi pointedly interjected.

She let out a dry laugh. “Which I am,” she confirmed and texted her back. “God, I hope we come away from this knowing where we stand with each other.”

“What if she asks you to stop sleeping with Nicky? Didn’t this all start over her feeling some type of way about that situation?”

Jan hesitated for a beat. “If she wants any say in who I sleep with, she’s gotta step up. You know, make an honest woman out of me.”

Gigi tilted her head. “You want her to propose?”

“No, no, but I can’t take the ambiguity anymore. Ask me out or cut me loose,” she took a deep breath. “Even if she doesn’t want me, I just need to know.”

Her friend looked at her with a sincere concern, as well as some confusion. “Jan, do you actually think there’s a chance she doesn’t want you? After all of this?”

Jan looked down, chewing on her lip. “I don’t know. Maybe I waited too long and she got over me. There’s only one way to find out, right?”

There was, as far as she was concerned. So, Jan emotionally collected herself as much as she could as she prepared to see Jackie. She had showered and did her hair, put on something nice while trying not to look like she was trying too hard. In an odd way, it felt like she was getting ready for both a job interview and a first date while it was distinctly neither.

She had to stop her hand from shaking as she knocked on Jackie’s door. She listened for Jackie’s footsteps to drown out her own heartbeat. This was her last chance to run, to avoid the confrontation for just a bit longer, to–

“Hey, Jan, come in.”

Her voice brought Jan’s train of thought to a grinding halt and she nodded, following Jackie inside without a word, though she did allow herself to take a few deep, leveling breaths.

Jackie sat down on the couch and waited for Jan to join her before speaking. “Listen, I don’t want you to think I went behind your back by doing this, but I talked to Nicky yesterday… Actually, she did most of the talking. But it was a good conversation nonetheless.”

Jan’s brows knitted as she listened. She wondered if that was why she hadn’t heard from Nicky today – she had merely assumed she was busy. “So you guys talked… Am I safe in assuming this has to do with us?”

“Well, yes,” Jackie rubbed the back of her neck and cleared her throat. “Jan, I…” Suddenly, everything she had prepared to say disappeared from her mind, a blank space in its place. There was a beat of hesitation before she decided to just speak from her heart. “I’ve been so fucking stupid. I’ve been driving myself crazy with guilt and fear and denial when I should’ve just been honest from the beginning.”

Jan swallowed thickly and leaned closer, nodding and gesturing for her to continue. “Being honest how?”

Jackie gently took Jan’s hand, looking her in the eye. “I should’ve just admitted how much I like you as soon as I realized it. How much I hated when you didn’t spend the night because I loved waking up to you in the morning. I should’ve just told you I was jealous of Nicky and asked you out instead of pushing you away and towards her.” She didn’t realize just how fast she had been talking until she paused to catch her breath. “What I’m trying to say is… I’m crazy about you, Jan. I want to be with you and– are you… Jan, are you crying?”

“No,” Jan blinked rapidly – she had spent far too long on her makeup to let any tears ruin it. “I’m fine, I just… I didn’t realize how much of a relief it’d be to finally hear you say that,” she admitted. Once she had collected herself, she moved closer to Jackie and cupped her face, placing a deep kiss to her lips. “I’m yours as long as you’ll have me.”

Jackie felt her whole body relax. She gingerly raked her fingers through Jan’s hair as she reciprocated the kiss, then rest their foreheads together. “Good, because I’m not letting you go any time soon.”

The two of them sat in blissful silence for a few moments, until Jan broke it. “What happens now?”

“Whatever we want, I suppose,” she shrugged, laying back on the couch and pulling Jan on top of her. “We don’t have anything else to do, anywhere else to be, we can just be with each other.”

Jan smiled and laid comfortably on top of Jackie. “I like the sound of that,” she told her as she pressed kisses along her jaw. “But at the same time, why stop at just being?”

Jackie arched her brow, resting her hand on the back of Jan’s head and craning her neck, allowing Jan more access as her lips traveled down. “Oh? What exactly are you implying, sweetheart?”

“I’m implying that we should consummate our relationship. You know, make it official. Bang.”

“Isn’t consummating when you do it for the first time?” Jackie asked. “Nevermind, not the point, killing the mood. Yes, let’s have sex. Bang.”

Jan giggled. “You know, I never specifically found the whole nerdy thing so sexy before you,” she mused, kissing and leaving hickies along Jackie’s neck, pausing only to take her shirt off. “You’ve just changed me, Jackie.”

Jackie rolled her eyes fondly. “Shut up.” She waited for Jan to take a break from marking her neck up to kiss her properly, to hold her tight as their tongues tangled and their hands roamed each other’s bodies. They were eager and haphazard in stripping each other, nearly falling off of the couch at a few points.

When they finally got themselves together, Jan was on top with her head between Jackie’s thighs and Jackie’s head between hers. Once in position, for a turn of phrase, everything fell into place. They held onto each other tightly, competing with each other to elicit louder moans, to make the other’s body tremble harder. Their tongues and fingers thrusted steadily, firmly, only to slowly become erratic when both girls got closer to finishing.

Jan ended up coming first, much to Jackie’s smug satisfaction. But she was as determined as ever to get Jackie off as well, and she did follow suit not long after.

The two of them laid contently in the post-coital haze. Jan turned herself around to rest her head on Jackie’s chest, rising and falling with her deep breaths. “It felt different this time,” she admitted quietly, “it was like my body felt more awake.”

Jackie gently rubbed Jan’s back, nodding as she listened. “I think I know what you mean. It was more intense, like we got to connect more, not just in the literal sense, of course.”

“Of course,” Jan echoed with a soft laugh, then glanced down for a moment. “So, this seals the deal? We’re girlfriends now?”

Jackie didn’t mean to giggle, but she couldn’t help it with how overwhelmingly cute it was. In the past hour, she had professed her feelings for Jan, then had sex with her, and Jan still wanted to hear that reassurance, to know just how wanted she was, and that there was no way to misunderstand it. “Yes, Jan. We are unquestionably girlfriends now,” she assured, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “You’re stuck with me now.”

“My dear Jackie, there’s no one else I would rather be stuck with,” Jan cooed.

——

“She’ll be ready for you in about ten minutes, you can go ahead and sit down in the meantime.”

“Thank you,” Brooke smiled politely at the receptionist before she and Vanessa took their seats on one of the couches in the spotlessly clean waiting room. She let out a deep breath, closing her eyes for a brief moment, then opening them to look at her wife. “Are you nervous?”

Vanessa chewed on her lip and swung her legs. “Kinda, yeah. But mostly excited, you know? Actually lookin’ through potential kids, possibly picking one to meet, one that could be ours, it’s a lot to let sink in.”

Brooke offered a reassuring smile and wrapped her arm around Vanessa. “I know, it doesn’t even fully feel real yet. It might not until we actually have the kid in front of us. But I think we’ll know when it’s right, and it will have all been worth it.”

Vanessa rested her head on Brooke’s shoulder. “You’re gonna be such a good mommy.”

“So are you, baby,” she cooed and pressed a kiss to her head. She looked down when she heard her phone go off. “Oh, Jackie texted me.”

“More Jan problems?”

Brooke read the text, a bright smile taking over her face. “Actually, I think it’s the opposite of a problem. She said she and Jan talked things out yesterday and, I quote ‘among other things, winky face’, and now they’re in a relationship.”

Vanessa sat upright, eyes wide. “No shit, they finally worked their drama out, huh? Jan ain’t fucking the French girl no more either?”

“Apparently not,” she chuckled, sending Jackie a congratulatory text before putting her phone away. “I’m so happy for them. I feel like we need to get them a cake or something.”

“Vanessa? Brooke Lynn?” The receptionist pulled them from their conversation. “You guys can go down the hall to room 402.”

The couple stood up and said ‘thank you’ in unison, then made their way down the hall. The room they entered almost resembled a principal’s office. There was a teacher’s desk and two chairs, and the shelves and walls were adorned with various awards and group photos with children who, they assumed, had been through this agency.

The woman sitting at the desk seemed kind and happy to see them and gestured them in. “You must be Mrs. and Mrs. Hytes-Mateo, my name is Alisha. I’ve gone over your file and I’m excited to be working with you two.”

“Thank you, everyone has been so helpful so far and we’re really looking forward to taking the next step,” Brooke replied.

“Wonderful, now, based on your profiles and what we have on record so far, we have a few possible matches I’d like for you ladies to look at,” she said, taking a small stack of folders off the side of her desk and setting it in front for the two of them to look through.

What followed was several minutes of the two of them going back and forth between folders, discussing pros and cons, picturing how the different children would fit into their world. There were little things that withdrew some from the adoption pool – one was allergic to cats, another needed to live on the ground floor, things they’d taken into consideration, but not necessarily thought of mentioning.

But then Vanessa suddenly stopped, grabbing Brooke’s wrist to get her attention. “Boo, this is it. I just know it,” she pushed one of the folders into the center. “It’s her, she’s the one,” she insisted.

Brooke looked through the file, reading the information carefully, then looked at Vanessa with a smile. “Vanjie, baby, I think you are absolutely right.” She then redirected her attention to Alisha. “So, how do we put the wheels in motion?”

Alisha offered a warm smile and gestured for her to return the file. “Well, let’s see who you two settled on and we’ll get started.”

#rpdr fanfiction #brooke lynn hytes #vanessa vanjie mateo #jan sport #jackie cox #branjie #jankie #lesbian au #university au #college au #smut #hold me tighter even closer #joley

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missjanjie · 4 years ago

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Hold Me Tighter (Even Closer) | (8/?)

Title: Hold Me Tighter (Even Closer) Summary: A sequel to Hold Me Closer, Tiny Dancer. Brooke Lynn and Vanessa are back at NYU, but with new and improved positions. Brooke’s ready to start her career as a professor when, as fate would have it, she realizes her TA, Jackie, might have the hots for a student named Jan. The couple just might see it as a sign to give two new girls the love story they found in the same place. Word Count: ~3k (this chapter) / ~24k (total) Relationship(s): Branjie (Brooke Lynn Hytes/Vanessa Vanjie Mateo), Jankie (Jan Sport/Jackie Cox) Rating: E

read on ao3 | ko-fi

Chapter Summary: More people talk some sense into Jackie, then Jackie finally talks to Jan. Meanwhile, the adoption process continues for Brooke Lynn and Vanessa.

“You know none of this would’ve happened if you just talked to her in the first place, right?” Jaida asked after having been caught up on her friend’s romantic turmoil.

Jackie rolled her eyes and absentmindedly stirred her coffee as she spoke. “Yes, Jaida. I know none of this would’ve happened if I had been upfront with my feelings. Happy?”

��Admitting it is the first step,” she nodded simply.