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inspector-montoya-fox · 5 years ago

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here’s why Thieves in Time is a bad game

before y’all try it, i just want to say that i’ll be as unapologetically petty and sarcastic as i want and fucking rip this game to shreds. yes, this is how i’ve spent my days since Thieves in Time came out. sitting alone in my room, staring at the wall, crying and complaining. because it has since been my life’s aim and dream to think about it every day, state the negative things about it, and become an evil essay witch on this half-dead website. *evil laugh*

Story:

References: i want to start with the smallest problem, but one that annoys me to this day. in the original trilogy, there weren’t a lot of references but the ones that were included were meticulously researched and well thought-out (i’m specifically referring to that Neil Diamond Carmelita vinyl gag, but can’t find the original post). the references in Thieves in Time however, were obviously just the creators’ interests. Turning Japanese, Clan of the Cave Bear and Bentley’s “hacksona” presented as Rambo just scream 1980s (which i’m assuming is the decade the creators grew up in), and Of Mice and Men is classic literature about the Great Depression, which subsequently started being taught in school in the US during the 1980s. it feels like the creators just went ‘let’s discuss what our lives had in common during our teen years and put that in’ instead of researching it first. and, here’s the thing: when you’re adding references, in order to make them funny or interesting, they have to fit in with the property or the character that’s connected to them in some way. Don Octavio was an opera aficionado so his episode’s title card pays homage to the Phantom of the Opera, young Muggshot was influenced by the movie “The Dogfather” because he’s a gangster, etc. these were funny because they were so spot-on with these characters. if every character in the Sly Cooper universe references the same type of stuff (from the 1980s) and shares the same interests, it’s just claustrophobic and uninteresting. i’m pretty sure i’m not the only one who had to look up these ultra-hetero, scrotum references when the game came out. that’s because they were specifically tailored to be funny to them, and not their target demographic which were kids in 2013.

Narrative: now that we got that out of the way, let’s look at the narrative. at the end of Sly 3, Bentley says he’s building a time machine. Sanzaru took that joke and decided to run with it as the premise for their game. ok, not the best idea, but i get it - you’re literally picking up where the last game left off. since all the storylines were wrapped up, they could’ve done something different like Sly’s kids or Bentley and Murray’s families, but this isn’t an essay about suggestions so...... time travel (i want to say that it’s, again, an 80s reference but whatever) was pretty ‘out there’ in 2013. i mean, even Plants vs Zombies 2, which was released that year, had to do with time travel (yes, i’m referencing an app). but Sanzaru had the advantage of applying this premise onto already established mythos and lore. the story had definite potential: someone is threatening Sly’s lineage so he has to travel back in time to save the day. the player would get to explore new locations and iconic eras in history, and, of course, the main selling point: playable ancestors. how could you screw that up? welp.... let’s think about the plot holes here for a sec. Bentley’s device would take the gang back in time when given an item from the specific era. stop. this right here is called ‘over-complicating’. how did they know the items would take them directly to the point where the specific ancestor was in danger? the Feudal Japan period lasted for 700 years: how did the machine know when and where to drop them off? and if the gang could return to the present at any time, why didn’t they do so when they were in trouble? oh right, the machine was broken. so how did they return the baddies to the present after they defeated them? i mean, why did they use the Grizz’s crown to travel to Medieval England if they went back to the present to drop him off to Interpol first? and on that note, how did they drop the baddies off to jail without getting caught and without Carmelita being around? i can already hear you thinking but these are total details that aren’t important, you jerk! well, yea, they truly are details and i truly am overthinking it. and yes, i truly am a jerk. but let me tell you something: when Sanzaru chose to make a new Sly game, did they not think ‘oh we’ll have to follow up Sly 2 and Sly 3′s stories’ which were well thought-out narratives with depth and various themes and didn’t have huge plot holes (as seen by my analysis through the episode project) ???? and did they also not think that their game would come out eight years after the last one, having expectations at an all-time high???? yea, that’s what i thought.

Characters: i’ll make a different section for Sucker Punch’s characters, so this is for Sanzaru’s original ones. name one iconic original character from Thieves in Time. i’ll wait... nope. not one. that’s because all of them were absolute shit. and here’s where i want to touch upon Sanzaru’s over-reliance on the trilogy. Ms Decibel (perhaps the most obvious copy) is a mix between Don Octavio, Miz Ruby, and the Contessa. El Jefe is Rajan if he went to the gym. Toothpick has Sir Raleigh’s temper and tendency to grow in size. and the Grizz is... whatever the fuck he is. (don’t worry i didn’t forget Le Paradox and Bob). there’s a difference between studying & creating similar characters and blatantly plagiarizing older characters because you lack the creativity. oh, boo-hoo this evil jerk’s telling it how it is. this set of villains is so lacklustre, i don’t even know where to begin. El Jefe is a tiger, even though we’ve already had two major tiger villains and one tiger flashlight guard. ok. Rajan could summon lightning because of the Clockwerk heart but El Jefe can do the same, how exactly? Toothpick is an armadillo (good) from Russia (better) with an obsession with the West (excellent) who can also grow huge (very bad). it’s never explained how or why. why?????? just tell me why. i want to know. i really want to know. Ms Decibel is an elephant who got into a tragic accident which left her with the power of hypnosis. music and hypnosis have already been done, but ok, i’ll give you the benefit of the doubt. so how do we use this character? spend the entirety of her screen time making jokes about... wait for it... her weight !!! this is top-notch comedy... really? like... really? the creators’ humor is a crime, at best. fart jokes and fat jokes all around. oh, and then there’s the Grizz. what the fuck where they thinking? just, what the fuck. i guess the guys at Sanzaru thought black people speak in rap? is that it? apart from it being extremely offensive, it’s also a blatant copy of Dimitri’s backstory. like, his introductory cutscene even has his paintings thrown at him and into the trash, like the intro cutscene for The Black Chateau. honestly, all of these villains caused me several types of pain, but not as much as...

Bob & Le Paradox: the absolute worst. i can just imagine the meeting going something like this: Sly’s ancestors are awesome! i wish we could fit them all in the game... here’s an amazing idea! what if we use one of the game’s few levels to introduce a brand new ancestor! yea! let’s make him dumb as fuck, strip him of any athletic prowess, and retcon the entire lineage by having him be the first Cooper ever! the kids will love a prehistoric level! ..... could you kindly point out where and when did ANYONE ask for this? i remember @ironicsnap saying something like the game is good until Bob. no, it was already bad - Bob just lowered the standard. like, a lot. people love Murray and his gameplay is neat, but no one ever thought ‘oh i wish we had a Cooper character with Murray’s game style’. why would they waste the opportunity to bring in Henriette, Thaddeus, Otto, literally any ancestor? why??? but they went ahead and created their own Cooper, and that wasn’t even the end of it. they had to make him dumb. they had to make him unbearable. they had to ruin the Cooper ancestry by adding this mess to the lineage. Sucker Punch made sure that all the ancestors were unique, but at the same time made all of them suave and funny and slick and you wish you could be them! well, fuck that. also, his name is Bob. Bob Cooper. it’s been 7 fucking years and i still can’t wrap my head around it.... so now, let’s talk about Le Paradox. i don’t have to mention the previous main villains, but i will. Clockwerk killed Sly’s ancestors and father, and was seemingly an eternal threat. Neyla was a psychopath who fooled everyone on her journey to becoming immortal by resurrecting Clockwerk. Dr M opened up the possibility for Sly’s dad to be a jerk instead of a hero, and died trying to unlock the Coopers’ legacy. how does Le Paradox compare? well, he’s a sleazebag skunk who was mad because of his dad’s downfall to the Coopers. that’s it. no twist, no depth, no clever dialogue. nothing. there’s nothing there. this is a new character, unfamiliar to everyone, who was hyped up for 5 levels and defeated in the conclusion. why was he a match for Sly? i don’t know. how did he fight for his life and ultimately tricked Sly into helping him? i don’t know. how the hell did he kidnap Carmelita? i don’t know. was it the power of persuasion? no, he’s revolting. so i literally don’t know. there’s no backstory, no fleshing-out the character, nothing. all we’re given to work with is a brief info-dump about his dad and how he escaped prison. i don’t know what else to say apart from how big a humiliation this was for Sanzaru and their team of writers. you had 8 years to work on something and this is what you came up with? anything would be better. anything would best this utter cliché of a villain, a distasteful misogynist, crybaby, idiot with an accent. literally anything.

Arcs & Themes: let’s take a look at the formulaic subplots for the gang’s members. apart from dealing with Le Paradox, everyone had a small arc. Sly had to deal with his break-up with Carmelita. Bentley had to deal with his break-up with Penelope. Murray had to deal with playing second fiddle to Bob. Carmelita was a damsel in distress and sex bait for the ancestors. the ancestors had their own mini storylines along with reacting to Sly’s presence. there you have it. i summarised it all for you, nice and neatly. are there any themes like in the previous games? nope. i promise you i’m not lying when i say that i tried hard to come up with something, even some speck of a detail i could use to over-analyse the story and come up with some ideas on themes. nothing. there are no themes. the subplots are character-driven and the player gives it 0 emotional investment. there is nothing to analyse, nothing to talk about. maybe even a theme for each level, like a spooky level or something? nope. the levels are dependent on eras and historical periods. the variation here is ok. Feudal Japan, Wild West, Prehistoric Australia, Medieval England and Ancient Arabia - pretty good selection. i’ll give them credit for it. but that’s it. due to the absence of themes, the hubs feel empty. there’s no replayability factor. after you collect the bottles and masks and treasures, there’s nothing. i would spend hours revisiting the trilogy’s hubs, just roaming around. the hubs here are huge and empty. there’s nothing to reminisce about. nothing to recall. oh that’s where this mission went down. no, nothing like that. the aforementioned subplots are resolved during mission cutscenes and then they’re gone. you don’t have to explore spooky Prague alone as Bentley to have him overcome his fears, you don’t have to find out miners abducted Murray’s beloved Guru and search the Australian outback for him, you don’t have to hold back your tears when you’ve reached the end of the Cooper Vault and Sly asks his dad for help. nothing.

Gameplay:

Controls: as soon as i laid my hands on the controller the first time i played the game, that fateful afternoon, i knew something was up. Sly would respond 1 second late after you pushed something on the controller. it felt clunky, is what i’m trying to say or, as my sister put it, it felt heavy. and she was right. the controls were clunky and heavy and didn’t feel light, like playing as a thief should feel. i don’t know shit about game mechanics but this definitely didn’t feel right. the hubs are also chunky in design, the cliffs are huge and so cyclical or hexagonal, that when you parachute your way to them and are just an inch close, Sly will automatically just drop because he can’t grab onto them. running as Sly doesn’t feel fast, silently obliterating guards from behind feels slow, and swinging, grabbing, pickpocketting, and hanging aren’t fun anymore. presentation-wise, @designraccoon goes into detail here, in an absolute gem of a post. in short, the gameplay animations make Sly look less sneaky. Sanzaru didn’t even consider a thief’s movements.

Missions: why the fuck would you remove the player’s option to choose between which mission to do first? why would you do that? the game lays out what goes first, sometimes having only one mission available in the hub. and the missions aren’t even enjoyable. firstly, the loading screens take up to 5 minutes, maybe even 7-8. secondly, there’s hacking every 2 missions. the missions don’t have any dialogue to make them fun, lack in interesting puzzles, what more can i say? they’re overly easy and lack any challenge whatsoever. at least there’s variation in gameplay (hacking, RC car, fishing, costumes, ancestors, turret etc.) but because of the controls, even these get tiresome. the missions are solely there to progress the story and that’s why the operations are merely ‘storm the main baddie’. the trilogy had some pretty interesting missions which made sure to complete jobs required to take down the big bad. e.g. kidnap General Clawfoot to take down the security, hack Contessa’s computer to make sure Carmelita will be freed, steal voices to tempt Neyla, and then take down the Contessa. the missions in Thieves in Time lack substance and variety. and the hacking (all three styles) sucks.

Collectibles: here’s another fantastic idea: have players collect costumes in order to collect bottles in order to collect treasures in order to collect masks in order to unlock funky Sanzaru logo-themed merch! what was the reason for the collectibles? in previous games, collecting all bottles would unlock special abilities. that was it. it’s the same thing here too, but there’s less incentive? i mean when you have to collect 1000 things, what’s the point? the treasures are random and very few are references to the trilogy, so whatever. and the masks unlock... superhero costumes for what reason exactly? oh, and then there’s also the achievements for your Playstation account, like ‘open the map in every single location you visit’. what fun! if the reason for collecting the treasures is to play godawful hacking minigames in order to get masks, what’s the point? decorate your paraglider with the Sanzaru logo? or have Bentley dress up as discount Robocop? i mean including masks in the interior locations was cool, but the bottles were always supposed to be something you could do whenever your soul desired. sometimes i left them last before the operation, sometimes i collected them before the first mission. so i was pissed when i found out that, in some cases, you had to unlock the episode’s costume in order to get the all the bottles. so, fuck off.

Animation: i’ll keep this short. the animation was terrible. do you remember that tumblr blog from a while back, where she dedicated the posts to pointing out the mistakes in the animated cutscenes? yeah. point is, there were lots of them. the animation style was bad, the character design was ugly, the characters’ movements were unnatural. everything about it was shit. looking past the bad decision to drop the trilogy’s comicbook-style animated cutscenes, couldn’t they have hired someone better? someone with more experience? their concept art was awesome. couldn’t they hire that guy and have it be comicbook style if he wasn’t trained in animation?

Legacy:

The Players: let me ask a genuine question: who was this game made for? kids growing up in 2013? maybe so. because it feels like Sanzaru didn’t even consider the fans of the trilogy. actually, it felt like a huge fuck you. Sucker Punch made their trilogy for whoever. there were great stuff for kids, but adults would pick up and appreciate the references, the real-life setting (e.g. tobacco use, existence of nightclubs, spice instead of drugs, etc.). that’s why all three games are timeless classics. judging by Thieves in Time’s humor, the game wasn’t targeted for adults. so, it doesn’t make sense to use an already established property, beloved by its fans, to attract a new audience consisting of nine year-olds who’d laugh at Murray dressing up as a woman. if they really wanted to appeal to the fans of the original, why retcon everything? why change who the first Cooper was? when the gang’s stranded in Saudi Arabia, why have Sly say ‘i couldn't remember a time since we've teamed up that we felt so defeated’? the gang’s been in way deeper shit before. why the ‘Sly’s dad vs Le Paradox’s dad’ deus ex machina? Sly’s dad wasn’t famous because of stealing the world’s largest diamond, what the fuck are you even talking about? do the guys at Sanzaru have such big egos and bravado that they needed to change the original games’ lore? were they so preoccupied with leaving their signature on a property which was never their own? i don’t know who needs to read this, but i’m stating FACTS.

Characters: now let’s talk about Sanzaru’s treatment of the Cooper gang and the ancestors (female characters will get their own section). why would you change the characters like that? if it wasn’t for the voice acting, i’d say this is a completely different Cooper gang. there’s no wise-cracking band of best friends, going on heists and being proud of their brotherhood and bond. all that is replaced with the formulaic story arcs for each member. the trilogy’s cutscenes and dialogues made sure to establish how Sly, Bentley and Murray have lived together since they met at the orphanage, play videogames all day and order chinese food and pizza and whatever. through missions and their adventures, they face obstacles they have to overcome as a gang, and when Sly 3 came around, their friendship was put to the ultimate test when they almost disbanded. Thieves in Time was too lazy to add to this. Sanzaru thought ‘oh the trilogy showed how they’re best friends so we might as well have them focus on their own stories separately’ and if this is truly the case then i ask again: who was this game made for? because new fans would never know how tight the gang was just by playing Thieves in Time. there’s a lack of genuine friendship moments. like, what happened when Sly came back after faking his amnesia? that’s completely ignored. where’s the witty banter? the ‘wizard & sitting duck’ type of jokes? nothing of the sort. what we get is fart jokes and Murray wanting to dress up as a woman. on that note, what was that all about? ok, have him dress up as a geisha to get in. fine. have El Jefe slap his ass, have him perform in a painfully lengthy dance sequence, have him dress like that during the rest of the episode, and then have him be persistent about getting the belly-dancing gig? the hell? Murray was always kinda goofy but this just feels kinda homophobic? it feels dragged out and unfunny. and then there’s the ancestors. i said it once before and i’ll say it again, Sanzaru deprived me of a buff Arab daddy Salim Al Kupar and gave us that elderly shit instead. all jokes aside, the redesigns were uninteresting. why take away Tennessee Kid’s facial hair and give it to Galleth? i legitimately think all the ancestors were boring. i mean, their gameplay was cool, especially Tennessee Kid’s guns, but in terms of character, they were just some dudes. did they believe that Sly was their descendant from the future? maybe. did they care? nope. they all had the same storyline of dealing with Sly’s arrival, flirting with Carmelita and getting their canes stolen. that was it. the fans waited for so long to get even a glimpse of the ancestors in action, and Sanzaru downplayed all of them. they reduced them to useless idiots too occupied with women and food, incapable of getting their canes back from stupid Le Paradox. and they didn’t even stick to the lore. no ma’am. let’s make Rioichi the inventor of sushi !! because that makes total sense and would defo fit in with the character and the property! why. just, why. you were handed the lore !!! you were given all this rich backstory and you threw it all away to replace it with trash !!! complete trash.

Changes & Inconsistency: i want to briefly mention some changes that pissed me off. where’s the laser glide move? it was an important turning point at the end of Sly 3, so why did they get rid of it? Sly is a master thief who’s traveling back in time, so you’d think they’d actually make him a master thief. also, the changes in the binocucom and Bentley’s slideshows in order to modernise them. if Sucker Punch managed to place the mission starting points at locations where the binocucom would show the objective clearly, so could Sanzaru. instead, they chose to have it be a moving camera, floating around the hub. and Bentley’s slideshows were absolute classics, opportunities to include gags and have Bentley show off in his own way. you just had to change it into a tablet, didn’t you. omg you’re still looking at small details like these? yes sweetie, i consider the details because i think they shape the game more than anything. if i didn’t consider the details, then my opinion on the game would be incomplete. when i praise the trilogy i don’t only look at story and gameplay. because i’m unbiased like that. here, i’d also like the mention Dimitri. what a fucking waste. you either include him in the game or you don’t. but don’t give me some half-baked shit on how he’s working for the gang back in present day. Dimitri staying home, waiting on the gang to call him in order for him to give them details on the villains. how does that even slightly resemble anything about Dimitri’s character? they didn’t even include his voice, some greasy sweet Raccoonus Doodus dialogue.

Female Characters: you know it’s all been leading up to this. this is the crux of the Thieves in Time hate. i don’t want to say the game is misogynistic so i’ll call it anti-feminist. why? just answer me. why? why did you have to disrespect Carmelita like that? right off the bat, they swapped the pants for the skirt. in what world does an active inspector who’s always on the scene wear a skirt? Carmelita now wears a skirt because her only role in the game is to be the love interest. Carmelita now wears bright red lipstick and has a new hairstyle, which would be ok if only it wasn’t Carmelita. Carmelita now plays up her inner sassy Latina because she’s pigeonholed into the ‘angry ex girlfriend’ role. they compartmentalised her, tried to sexualise her because she couldn’t possibly be one of the boys. nope. let’s take a respected woman, high in rank and as physically able as Sly, and turn her into a cliché, an angry ex girlfriend for comedic relief, strip her of her abilities and have her be kidnapped twice, have every exchange with her be about how attractive she is, have almost every male character in the game flirt with her, have her boyfriend be jealous of his own ancestors because they’re flirting with her in order to create purposeless love triangles, and then, after all that, dress her up as a belly dancer and distract some guards while the rest of the gang do the heavy lifting. that last one was really the nail on the coffin. did Bentley have other ways to enter that door? absolutely. so, what the fuck? why did i come back for a good Sly game 8 years later and receive a game where you have to shake your controller to have Carmelita shake her ass? why did they have the guards’ eyes pop like that? why did no one stop them? and it isn’t just Carmelita. it’s Penelope too. god forbid we have a female character who doesn’t have a waist smaller than my finger, and a voluptuous physique. why was the redesign so drastic? the story stuff is also nonsensical. why did she leave? wasn’t she happy with Bentley? i watched her speech about turning on the gang about a thousand times and it still doesn’t make any sense. like, i literally don’t understand. what was her motive? and why reverse her story of overcoming the Black Baron persona and the connotations of a meek woman hiding behind a man’s disguise? why repeat it, shamelessly? do the guys at Sanzaru only know women who have recently broken up? why does Carmelita, Penelope and Ms Decibel all go through break-ups during the game? why does Penelope go against Bentley before they even break up? why waste the opportunity to introduce a new, well-written villain and use it to repeat something already done? why???? no woman is safe from Sanzaru because Ms Decibel... boy, did i feel bad for her. apart from continuously reminding us that she’s haha fat!! she’s also presented as a blind lovefool. love? what a silly concept only women believe in! Ms Decibel had a crush on Le Paradox (for some reason i can’t even fathom) and for that she must pay by being utterly humiliated. and what do ALL women do when a guy breaks up with them? they get so angry! yikes, stay clear guys! ....why does Sanzaru hate female characters? i’m genuinely curious. i mean, what forced them to depict women like this? i’m sorry, i can’t take much more of this.

Ending: and how do you end a disappointment that came 8 years late and didn’t even have a sequel guaranteed? yeap, you guessed it! a cliffhanger. but not just any cliffhanger - a total fuck you to anyone and everyone. with a single move Sanzaru instantly screwed over the franchise. the fans, the creators, the characters, anyone looking to continue the series. everyone. WHY would you trap the protagonist in the past? WHY? did you feel defensive about something that wasn’t even yours and went ‘well you can continue the series but the sequel will have to do with time travel’. why did you think it was a good idea? how does it even slightly resemble a good ending? someone fill me in please. because i don’t think i’m being unreasonable, i’m just telling it how it is.

Conclusion:

i did it. i fucking wrote it in all its motherfucking glory. the idiots at Sanzaru could’ve given us an amazing game but instead of working on how to make it better or including extra levels, they wasted their time on deciding what killable baby animal to include in each hub or what the backstory for each treasure should be. how fucking distasteful. and to think i’m an idiot myself for trying to force myself to like it because i was so in denial about how bad it was. i’ve just outlined everything wrong with that cursed game. i’m exhausted.

#yOu'Re rEaLLy pEttY ! sOrRy hAd tO UnFoLLoW #i think i covered everything #THIS IS AN AMAZING ESSAY #this is the crown jewel of my time on tumblr #i love myself so much #sly cooper #anyone who even remotely comes for me because of this WILL get blocked #the birds really think i care about my rep on this fucking hellsite #HAHAHAHAHAHHAHA

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ficsandcatsandficsandcats · 5 years ago

Note

As inspired by Joey being absolutely fricken precious, how about Jaskier (even modern AU if you feel it fits better) helps reader make a DnD character and theyre both just being generally chaotic cuties? Maybe Jask suggested the game as a distraction from stress? (Like forreal, dnd gives me something to look forward to in these times.) 💕

Fandom: The Witcher Pairing: Modern!Jaskier x Reader Word Count: 1,298 Rating: G Taglist: @heroics-and-heartbreak @whatevermonkey @mycat-is-mylove @mynamesoundslikesherlock @kemmastan @magic-multicolored-miracle @writingstudent @mlleecrivaine @coffee-and-stories @amirahiddleston @ultracolorfulnerdcollection @astouract @your-not-invisible-to-me @daydreamer-in-training @morelikebyesexual a/n: Modern!Jask helping Reader through quarantine stress by the power of Dungeons and Dragons. Thank you for this amazing prompt, nonny. Hope you enjoy xo

He’d been watching you grow more and more anxious as you watched the news and tried to telework. Jaskier was grateful that you had a job where you could work from home during these dangerous times, but he knew that it meant you never felt you had a break. You were always checking emails or fretting over things long past the work hours you’d set. There was only one thing to do.

You jumped as the books were plopped onto the table but before you could ask what was going on Jaskier had already turned around and was walking back to his office. This time he returned with a wooden chest that you knew contained his dice collection, as well as a couple of binders. He sat next to you front of the supplies and the azure eyes fixed you with a determined and excited look.

“Y/N, the time has come,” he intoned dramatically. You cocked your eyebrow in question but he saw an amused smirk play about your lips and he was encouraged that he was on the right track. “The time has come for you to play Dungeons and Dragons.”

“Oh! But… how?” you asked. You’d been planning on joining the game he hosted once a week, overtaking the dining room table while you usually relaxed in the bedroom or your office, but the quarantine had dashed those plans. Or so you’d thought.

“My group has decided to try out playing online and you will be joining,” he explained. He slowly snuck the laptop away from you and you didn’t stop him, glancing with interest at the books in front of you.

“I’m so excited!” he said with eyes shining with excitement and a giddy smile that was infectious.

“Ok well you know I don’t know basically anything about this so how do we start?” you asked. He pulled the topmost book down and pulled a couple pieces of paper from a binder.

“First we make your character. Now my group has been playing for a bit so they’re at level five now so I think it’s best to make your character the same level. That just means you’re going to get more cool shit, so don’t even worry about that. Let’s look at races,” he handed you the book opened to a page and you skimmed through them, looking at the different races you could be while Jaskier explained where you didn’t understand.

“Ok so halflings are just, like, hobbits, right?” you asked.

“Yep!” Jaskier answered.

“Well I AM a hobbit basically so I’m going with that,” you said decisively.

“Excellent choice! You’ll get halfling’s luck which means if you roll a one, which is usually a critical failure, you get to reroll. Ok now we move onto classes,” he turned the pages, thumbing through them with the ease that can only be gained by rereading something so often you know exactly where to find what you want. He handed the book over to you again and it took longer to consider your options.

“Let’s break it down this way first, do you want to fight or do you want to cast spells?” he asked, noting your confusion.

“I want to be magic,” you replied. From there he took you through the options again.

“Wait – what’s the difference between a sorcerer and a wizard?” you asked.

“Wizards have to study and learn magic whereas sorcerer’s have a sort of innate magic,” he explained.

“Ooh… see I’m torn because in Harry Potter they’re called Wizards but I like the idea of just having magic within me,” you mused.

“Oh love, you most certainly have magic within you,” Jaskier said with a little wink. You rolled your eyes but laughed, the first time he’d seen you laugh in a while.

“Ok you know what actually I’m going to go with Warlock,” you said suddenly.

“Oh? Going for the sketchy class, eh?” he teased.

“As far as I can see there’s nothing sketchy about it. You work for a god, you get some magic. It’s like capitalism. Or having a sugar daddy,” you reasoned. Jaskier laughed but nodded.

“Alright, the good news is you can pick your sugar daddy. There’s Archfey or some Fiendish ones or-”

“Mephistopheles?” you ventured hopefully.

“Oddly specific but yes, that could happen,” he replied.

“Mephistopheles,” you said decisively, a smile that was borderline creepy coming over your face.

“Do we – uh – need to have a little talk about why you’re so horny for Mephistopheles?” he asked.

“Do you want to have that talk?” you asked pointedly.

“Good point. Just – no summoning demons in the apartment, alright? It would make quarantine just a bit too awkward for me,” Jaskier pleaded. You made a big production of sighing dejectedly.

“Fine,” you grumbled, “Ok what’s next?”

He took you through the backgrounds (“I can straight up be a Charlatan? Like that can just be my identity?”) and the alignments (“ok but it would be too cliché to have Mephistopheles as my patron and be evil, right? Like there would be a more satisfying tension if I was good but he was so, so bad… Hey, come back!”) and equipment (“I want a bag of holding but like I want it to look like an Ikea bag”) and before long you had a character.

“What do you want to name your Chaotic Good Charlatan Halfling Warlock who frequents Fantasy Ikea?” Jaskier asked as he helped you finish filling out your stats.

“Ooh I’m not sure. Would it be plagiarism if I named my hobbit Pippin? Like, will the ghost of J.R.R. Tolkien arise from his grave and shake a finger at me sternly if I do that?” you asked.

“I think we’ll be fine. There’s literally a whole musical called Pippin,” he replied. Your eyes widened in excitement. “Different Pippin.”

You looked decidedly less excited but when you turned back to your character sheet you happily wrote PIPPIN BRANDYBUCK” on the paper.

“Brandybuck eh? Just doubling down on the Lord of the Rings references?” Jaskier asked with amusement.

“I am obviously their child, Jaskier,” you said with a little head shake as if he were being silly.

“You’re such a nerd,” he teased with a look of pride on his face.

“Well you’re the Dungeon Master so….,” you countered.

“Yes, which means you’re sleeping with the Dungeon Master. Don’t expect to get any special treatment. My monsters aren’t going to pull any punches,” he insisted.

“Your monsters won’t need to. Pip is a badass and has the power of Demons and Anime on her side,” you retorted, doodling little hearts around your character’s name.

“Oh you’ll also need to write a backstory. Not right this second but just anything you can think of that you want me to know. Family, any relationships, that sort of thing.”

“She has a great love,” you said immediately, “A bard who travels far and wide. She grew tired of his traveling and that he expected her to just be waiting around for him to come back and that’s why she set off on her own, to have her own adventures instead of waiting to hear about his.”

Jaskier scribbled down some notes on a notebook he pulled from another binder and looked at you expectantly after you’d finished talking.

“That’s all I have for now,” you admitted.

“That’s brilliant! That’s a really good start! See, you’re a natural at this!” he exclaimed. You leaned over and kissed him, and then pulled back just far enough to look him in the eyes.

“Thank you,” you said, giving him a meaningful look, “I didn’t realize how much I needed something to focus on that wasn’t just another stressor.”

He smiled, cupping your face with his hands to pull you in for another kiss.

#Anonymous #Modern!Jaskier x Reader #Jaskier x Reader #Jaskier fluff #Jaskier imagines #COVID-19 mention

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svtmatokis · 5 years ago

Text

Miracle P4

I literally just finished writing Miracle P6 and I CANNOT wait for you guys to read it! But until then, here is Miracle P4

Plot: What if it was love at first sight? Jihoons lost all passion for music after being wronged two years ago and right as he was about to quit, someone unexpectedly enters his life and changes it for the better

Pairing: Reader x Jihoon

Words: 4294

Warnings: A lot of chapters have a bit of swearing

Jihoon walked into the house and was satisfied that it was already empty and knew that most of the guys who lived there were already at your house preparing for the party.

With your hands still attached, he lead you to the dining room where a bouquet and gift box waited for you. He pulled out the chair for you to sit down in and handed you the flowers which weren’t roses but a mixture of your favorite ones which was wrapped in purple tissue.

The next thing he handed you was the box and urged you to open it.

You gently pulled the ribbon apart and opened the box to find a bunch of your favorite snacks with a little note from Jihoon written on each of them. You giggled as you came across a few funny inside jokes the two of you shared and at the bottom of the box was your favorite chocolates with a note that said:

‘I’ve learned your taste and I love your style. I feel like we’ve been dating forever, so will you be mine?’

“Oh my gosh this is so cheesy.” you whispered with a slight sniffle but a smile was stuck on your face as you looked up at Jihoon who had gone up to his room to change into something more party appropriate which resulted in a white long sleeved shirt and dark jeans. “Is this your way of asking me to be your girlfriend?”

“Would you say yes if it was?” he asked back as he kneeled in front of you with your hands in his and he brought them to his lips to kiss each knuckle.

“I would say yes to you for anything.” you admitted shyly, “Thank you for all this..”

“Anything for my girl.” he said liking the sound of it as it rolled off his tongue and knew he could get used to this. “Then, would you say yes if I asked to kiss you then?”

“I really don’t think you need to ask Ji.” you said with a cheeky grin as he leaned forward and covered your lips with his in a soft perfect first kiss.

After a few moments, Jihoon pulled away with a satisfied grin on his face. “We should get going, I promised the guys that you would be in time for the party. You are the guest of honor after all.”

“Promise you won’t leave me tonight?” you asked, “I know that Tae, Kook and Jimin are going to try to get me as wasted as they can but I also have dance practice with Hobi tomorrow that I can’t miss.”

“Promise. The last thing we need is for you and Hoseok to not make finals in the duo competition this time.” he said standing up before pulling you up and meeting your lips once. “And I can definitely get used to this too.” he whispered rubbing his nose against yours making you giggle.

“You know Ji, I think I can say the exact same thing.” you said picking up the flowers as Jihoon took the box and the two of you made your way out the door and to your birthday party.

Meanwhile, Soonyoung approached the group at the party who had gathered at Yoongi’s DJ post and put his hand on Hoseok and Jungkooks shoulder.

“Guys, I might have to throw fists tonight.” he said as everyone turned to look at him.

“Whats up?” Namjoon asked as Soonyoung theoretically blew smoke out of his nose.

“I’m not sure how but Jihoons stupid ex is here with Lina. If she tries to ruin anything between Y/N and Jihoon, I am going to throw fists.” Soonyoung said pointing in the direction to where Hana stood with Lina.

“Lina from our dance class?” Hoseok asked and Soonyoung nodded.

“Don’t throw fists Soon.” Jin reprimanded, “You can get kicked out of all clubs if you do.”

“So?” Soonyoung asked obviously annoyed, “She broke my best friends heart and has the audacity to show up at his new girlfriends birthday party. I smell something fishy and its definitely not the salmon you made today Jin.”

“I’ll fight her in your place baby.” Kimi said sliding up next to Soonyoung and wrapping her arm around his waist. “Only if she does something to make Y/N upset though.”

“Awe! You’re so sweet honey! Fighting for both mine and Y/N’s honor like that.” Soonyoung cooed as he placed a kiss on Kimis cheek.

“Geez, the relationship between two black belts..” Jin said with a shake of his head, “well if she provokes you then you have free reign but please leave the blood to a minimum. We literally just replaced the carpet from Kookies birthday.”

“Let me go talk to her first and see what’s really up.” Seungcheol said leaving the group immediately and made his way towards the duo.

“They’re cousins” Soonyoung said as everyone gave him a questioning look, “They don’t really get along but family’s family. Have Y/N and Jihoon arrived yet?”

“She went to change out of her dance outfit.” Jihoon said coming out of nowhere causing a few to jump. “We snuck in through the back door when we saw all the people at the front.”

“So how did the plan go?” Jin asked curiously, “Are you going to be my brother in-law?”

“Well….” Jihoon started explaining what had happened between the two of you in the last hour or so.

Meanwhile, Seungcheol had found Hana and Lina by one of the tables that Jin had put out for the event and tapped her on the shoulder.

Hana turned around and gasped when she saw Seungcheol give her one of his fake smiles and waves, “S-Seungcheol...what are you doing here?”

“I’m good friends with the host and the birthday girl.” Seungcheol explained, “Can I talk to you in private?”

“I’m actually here with Lina and I really shouldn’t leave her alone.” Hana said trying to excuse herself but Seungcheol recognized the girl from dance class and shot her a charming smile.

“Is it okay with you Lina? I saw Chan near the food table, I think he said he wanted to talk to you about one of the routines you worked on.” Seungcheol said using the crush she had on the junior captain to his advantage.

“Of course Cheol.” she said and smiled at Hana, “I’ll be right back. Come find me when you’re done.”

“O-okay...see you later.” Hana said hesitantly and once Lina was out of sight Seungcheol pounced.

“What are you doing here Hana?” he asked immediately. The two never really got along as family and ever since the break up with Jihoon, Seungcheol kept his distance from her. Even though she was family, she still broke his best friends heart and up until now he was healing, “You don’t even go here.”

“I came to tour the school for the week...I’m thinking about transferring to a different arts program that our school didn’t have.” Hana started and Seungcheol cut her off.

“Bull shit, you got kicked out of your program didn’t you.” Seungcheol stated, “Did you steal someones music again? Or are you really here to try and get Jihoon back?”

“No!!” Hana quickly defended herself, “Why would you think I stole someones music?”

“Because you did that to my best friend.” Seungcheol said, “Stole, sold and accused him of plagiarizing. You know, I never really got to talk to you about that.”

“Well you wouldn’t listen when I tried to explain. Jihoon wasn’t exactly innocent in this either.” Hana argued as her eye caught sight of said person talking to a group of boys. The smile on his face as he was explaining something to them was undeniable and she started to question why all the guys were patting him on the back.

“Hana, you stole his music and sold it to other students to use for their projects. You then convinced the department that HE had stolen YOUR music for his projects. Think about how embarrassed he felt. He already had a reputation as a producer in the school and it got tarnished just because you were jealous of his work. You claimed that the music he worked so hard on was yours. I know the full story Hana. I know the music that Jihoon was working on. I was the one who introduced you two.” Seungcheol said silently thanking Yoongi who had turned the music up so no one could hear what he was saying. “I regret introducing him to you cause all you did was break his heart.”

“It wasn’t my fault!” Hana said frustrated, “I had to be at the top of the class. Then Jihoon started using his original music for projects and suddenly he takes the spot. You know how bad that made me look? I was number one for so long and then my boyfriend comes in and bam, his music takes over mine. I had a reputation Seungcheol. You would never understand.”

“Oh I do.” Seungcheol said with a nod, “Cause my friend here has a reputation and guess what, his little sister took that spot away from him and I have never seen him prouder” He was obviously referring to you and Yoongi who continued to encourage each other through your works of music. Yoongi had even gone as far as to write a song about how proud he was of you and you in turn wrote a thank you to the mentor you almost never met. “You never encouraged Jihoon because of your jealousy and inturn, he neglected you right?”

Seungcheol smirked at Hana’s sudden silence and patted her shoulder, “Just know that whatever you’re trying to do here won’t work. Jihoon isn't the same quiet guy everyone once knew. When he transferred here, he got his backbone and the most support he’s ever had, don’t try to take that away from him.”

“But...I realized all that after I got kicked out of the program...I was always jealous of him because he was more liked in the music department and I suddenly just became ‘Jihoon’s girlfriend’.”she said looking down, “That’s why I want to transfer here...to show Jihoon that I’ve changed…”

“Well...that’s not going to work in your favor anymore.” Seungcheol said with a sigh, “He’s moved on and it wouldn’t be a good idea for you to associate with that group-”

Seungcheol was cut off by Soonyoung jumping on one of the tables and yelling into the mic that he had taken from Yoongi’s DJ stand.

(Earlier)

“See, I told you the cheesy note would work.” Taehyung said patting Jihoon on the back as the rest did after he told them how you agreed to be his girlfriend, “Welcome to the brotherhood man.”

“I also wanted to let you know that Hana’s here.” Soonyoung said watching Jihoon’s reaction carefully and funnily enough, he seemed unphased. “Cheols talking to her now.”

“You’re telling me this after the girl of my dreams agreed to be my girlfriend.” he stated, “Do you seriously think I could give a fuck? I saw Hana earlier when I was waiting for Y/N and I thought I was going to break but once Y/N grabbed my hand, the only person I saw was her. That’s when I kind of knew that I was completely over her.”

Hearing this made Soonyoung happy, like really happy. As he saw you come out of your bedroom dressed in a white v-neck and black skinny jeans with your hair curled, he grabbed the mic from Yoongis DJ stand (under his protests) and hopped on one of the tables (with Jin reprimanding him in the background.)

“EVERYBODY MAKE SOME NOISE!!!!!!!!” He yelled as the whole house cheered, “I just wanted to announce that this is probably the happiest day of my life. Why you ask? Because MY best friend” he pointed at Jihoon who was currently leaning on Yoongi’s DJ table with his hand over his eyes in embarrassment but laughing, “has finally gotten his shit together and asked our birthday girl and dance captain over here.” he then pointed at you who had been making your way towards said group but stopped to look at him with wide eyes when Soonyoung addressed you, “To be his girlfriend!”

“FINALLY!” you could hear most of the dance team including Chan and Vernon yell through the crowd and you suddenly felt your face heat up in embarrassment and quickly ran towards the group of boys and into Jihoon’s arms where he wrapped his arms around you laughing as you hid your face in his shoulder from pure embarrassment.

“What the heck was that?!” you asked Soonyoung as soon as he hopped off the table and returned the mic.

“A definite show opener thats what.” Yoongi said handing you a drink he had gone to get during Soonyoungs little announcement. “Happy Birthday baby girl.”

“Happy birthday Y/N!” the group that surrounded you chorused as everyone put their drinks together.

Seungcheol smiled at the sight before him while Hana frowned. You were the girl that Jihoon had been with earlier when they ran into each other.

“They won’t last.” she said automatically, “He’s going to neglect her for his work eventually...no one understands it like I do and how could someone like him date someone as ugly and plain as her?”

“I bet you my inheritance that you’re wrong.” Seungcheol said as he saw you pretty much cling to Jihoon as Jungkook, Taehyung and Jimin gave you drinks left and right, “Oh he is definitely going to need help with her later.”

Jihoon had this smile on his face that he hadn’t seen in so long and he could see that Jihoon was happy you were depending on him. Your body was pressed against his side as the two of you stood next to Yoongi’s DJ booth where Seungcheol knew would be the main spot for the group for the night. Yoongi rarely left his DJ booth during parties and you wanted to celebrate your birthday with all your close friends and brothers. He held back a laugh when he saw Jihoon take the drink out of Taehyungs hand to chug it himself making the other dancer pout. Jungkook then handed you big glass which you took and finished within a few seconds. That one had probably hit you hard since he noticed your head was now on Jihoons shoulder and Jihoon was laughing while rubbing your back gently, whispering into your ear.

“I bet you that she’ll get bored of him quickly.” Hana said, “And he’ll come back to me once he realizes that I’ve changed for the better.”

“And you’re delusional.” Seungcheol said with that fake grin as he noticed Lina, Chan, Vernon and Joshua come towards them. “ He’s finally found someone who depends on him as much as he does her. Don’t mess with Jihoon, Hana. There will be consequences and not only from me. ” he finished just as the boys and Lina joined the group.

“Who owes me money?” Seungcheol then asked the three boys who grumpily gave him twenty dollars each.

“I seriously didn’t think he’d wait this long!” Chan whined, “They were always together in and out of class that so many thought they were already officially together.”

“Jihoon likes to take his time. You know that.” Joshua said with a sigh as he saw Taehyung wave him over. He had a tray of shot glasses in his hand and knew that it was time for the birthday shot.

“We should really join the birthday girl though. I see Tae has prepared the shots.” Vernon said starting to walk away, “See you later Lina!”

Slowly one by one the group dispersed and soon Lina and Hana were left to their own devices.

“I can’t believe Jihoon and Y/N finally got together.” Lina said laughing as she saw the group around Yoongi take shots. “They’ve been dancing around each other since she got back from London.”

“London?” Hana questioned.

“Y/N left during freshman year to go study in London for a program that the school offered. She just came back this year. I heard that she’s the younger sister of the student body president and also close with Min Yoongi who’s a known producer. I’m not sure of their connection though.” Lina said, “She’s also the captain of the dance team. She’s really nice, do you want to go meet her?”

Hana winced as she saw you look at Jihoon and ever so discreetly, he leaned down to give you a quick peck on the lips which obviously everyone around them saw and started cheering once again.

“I’m actually kind of tired...can I have the key to your dorm? I think I’m going to head back first.” she said with a tight smile and feeling sick to her stomach.

“Sure, I’m going to hang around a while longer. It’s not everyday that the whole dance department gets invited to these parties.” Lina said handing Hana the key. “Feel better!”

With one last look at the lovely couple, Hana made her way to the exit trying to get the image of how happy Jihoon looked with another girl in his arms out of her head.

Later in the evening, the party was starting to wind down and only the dance team members as well as everyone from the SVT Frat house remained. You somehow had gotten roped into playing a game of beer pong with Taehyung, Joshua and Seungcheol while Jihoon had stayed by the DJ booth with Yoongi and watched to make sure you were okay.

“So I’m not going to have to give you the talk am I?” Yoongi asked as the two observed the beer pong game at hand. Jin was currently the referee while Namjoon, Jungkook and the rest watched from the sidelines.

“The talk?” Jihoon asked looking at his mentor, “You mean the, if I hurt her I’ll die talk?”

Yoongi nodded his head, “I worked two years to get you two together and if you fuck it up…”

“I won’t.” Jihoon said with finality in his voice, “She’s too special to me and she’s the reason why I’m doing better in class this year than I was last year.”

“I can see that, you two are neck in neck right now in marks.” Yoongi said taking a gulp of his drink, “But your ex girlfriends here too, what about her?”

“What about her?” Jihoon asked, “When I saw Y/N at the cafe that day and didn’t know it was her I was already intrigued. To find out that she’s the girl you’ve been wanting to set me up with after you started mentoring me is something else. She’s so much more then you described Yoongi. She’s my light.”

“So theres nothing…” Yoongi started and Jihoon shook his head.

“Not since Y/N came into the picture. She makes me forget the pain I went through and I’m pretty sure I’d do anything for her at this point.” Jihoon said as he watched you chug another glass. He knew that he’d have to step in soon if you wanted to remotely make it to class tomorrow as well as your dance practice with Hoseok who had been limiting himself to only a few drinks and a lot of water.

“Ji!!” Seungcheols called out as the two producers saw you tap out and was currently being held up by Jin and Joshua who were laughing at your state. It was obvious none of them were worried as you were surrounded by people who cared about you and wouldn’t let anything happen to you. But that didn’t mean that they wanted to care for your drunk ass since you had a boyfriend to do that.

“And this is where I come in.” Jihoon said putting his drink down.

“Take her to her room to make sure she’s okay. You can stay the night if you want, I trust you.” Yoongi said with a nod and Jihoon chuckled.

“It’s not like I haven’t spent the night before.” he said and Yoongi snorted.

“Yea, but you were both sober and working at the time. Now my sisters drunk beyond compared and you’re her boyfriend. It’s different. I’ll check on you guys later on.”

“Sounds good. I’ll talk to you later.” Jihoon said as he made his way over to the group of gamers and wrapped his arm around your waist.

“How’s my little birthday girl?” he asked as you looked up at him smiling drunkedly giggling.

“There you are!” you said leaning into his shoulder and inhaling his scent, “You weren’t supposed to leave me tonight...now look at what they did to me” you whined with a pout and Jihoon chuckled as he slowly lead you away from everyone after saying good night.

“I’ve stocked your room with bottled water which you are going to drink for me before you pass out and I’ve also toweled your bathroom just incase we have a puking accident.” he said as he opened the door to your room and placed you on the couch sitting up.

“Look at you all boyfriendly already.” you said giggling leaning into his chest as he handed you a bottle of water. “I don’t think I’ll puke though… I didn’t drink that much...”

“We’ll see what happens after you drink the water okay?” he said knowing exactly how much you drank that night. He was already amazed that you had yet to puke but he was told by Yoongi that you and Jimin tend to drink on the regular so your tolerance was fairly high.

You finished half a bottle before letting out a sigh, finding comfort in Jihoons presence and scent. “I’m really happy you know that?” you asked tiredly as you felt Jihoon place a kiss on the crown of your head.

“Why is that?”

“Because, I got the bestest birthday present I could ever ask for.” you muttered drunkedly as your head started dropping and Jihoon couldn’t help but chuckle as the smile he had on his face grew. “I got to spend it with my family and best friends for the first time in two years...and Jihoonie too.”

“I’m glad you let me spend your birthday with you” he said as he noticed something was off, “And I told you that you were going to puke.” he stated right as you shot up to run to your bathroom and emptied your stomach.

Jihoon wasn’t that far behind you to hold your hair back and was glad that he put towels on the floor cause once you were done, you wouldn’t get up.

“Come on baby, we need to get you up and in bed.” he said gently as you refused to move.

“You called me baby.” you said tiredly and Jihoon had to hold in his laugh. You were so adorable when you were drunk and he was happy that he was one of the few people who got to witness this.

“Well you are. You’re my Y/N baby as of today.” he said lifting you up and carrying you back to your room once he was sure you were done puking.

“Does that mean our anniversary is on my birthday?” you muffled into his shoulders.

“That would be correct.” he said placing you on the couch and gave you an extra large t-shirt he knew that you wore to sleep. “Can you change yourself?”

He turned around when you nodded your head and went through his phone to see various texts from the guys checking in on your situation.

“Does that mean that I’ll be sad on my birthday if we ever break up?” you asked sadly and Jihoon whipped his head around quickly thanking that you had changed already and was at your side in an instant.

“Well, thats never going to happen so you don’t have to worry about that.” he reassured as he wrapped his arm around your shoulder, pulling you to him. “You’re too special to me for me to let you go that easily.”

“Even with Hana here?” you asked leaning on his chest to not meet his eyes and he felt his heart clench at the sound of insecurity.

“Never. You showed me a lot of things Hana never did. You’ve pushed me to come out of my shell for the first time in two years and to work harder as a producer. You’re a miracle that’s come into my life and I never want to let you go.” he answered stroking your hair gently which was in fact lulling you to sleep.

“Promise?” you asked softly and Jihoon knew that you were starting to doze off.

“I promise” he whispered and continued to stroke your hair and pretty soon, he heard your quiet snores signifying that you were now asleep.

Every so gently, he lifted you up bridal style and moved you to your bed to place you down softly and cover you with your blanket but before he could get up again, you clung to his wrist.

“Stay…” you pleaded quietly and Jihoon smiled looking at your cute pouty face.

“Okay” he whispered and took off his shoes and laid down on top of the blankets with one hand intertwined with yours and that was how Yoongi and Jin found the two of you later once the party had died down.

Your two older brothers looked at each other with drunken smiles, content that you had found someone who could care for you as much as they did. That was all they wanted.

#Woozi #woozi imagine #bts #bts imagine #woozi fiction #kpop #kpop fiction #kpop imagine #jihoon #lee jihoon #jihoon imagine #jihoon fiction #seventeen imagine #seventeen #seventeen fiction

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aelaer · 5 years ago

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Hey aelaer, I have a question and since you seem to have been writing fanfic forever, I think you're a good person to ask this. I have a crossover idea with Doctor Strange and another universe, but to my dismay someone has already written something similar (not the same universe). I did have my story plotted out already, but there's some key concepts that can't be avoided I don't know if I should give up. I don't want to be accused of plagiarism even if the story is completely different.

Hi, thanks for thinking of me for your question! I have a tendency to ramble (and I ended up writing an essay for this) so let me answer you immediately: yes, you should still write it.

Now the rest of the answer delves into the why, in entirely too much detail as I am wont to do.

According to plagiarism.org, Merriam Webster defines the following items as plagiarism:

to steal and pass off (the ideas or words of another) as one’s own

to use (another’s production) without crediting the source

to commit literary theft

to present as new and original an idea or product derived from an existing source

For instance, if I were to state that the above was my own words, I would be plagiarizing both Merriam Webster and plagiarism.org (which is just irony at its finest).

Figuring out how to avoid plagiarizing words is easy: don’t copy-paste words that aren’t yours and declare them as yours. Slight rewording of the content doesn’t keep it from being plagiarism, either. The issue of ideas, however, is a good deal more difficult to quantify, especially in the creative space.

The Office of Research Integrity starts off by giving us a base point of idea plagiarism with the sciences in the following statement:

“In the sciences, as in most other scholarly endeavors, ethical writing demands that any ideas, data, and conclusions borrowed from others and used as the foundation of one’s own contributions to the literature, be properly acknowledged. The specific manner in which we make such acknowledgement may vary depending on the context and even on the discipline, but it often takes the form of either a footnote or a reference citation.”

This makes sense. In many educational systems kids are taught to properly site sources for information, which extends to ideas within the scientific community. If you are building your thesis on cancer research upon the discoveries of other researchers, they need to be referenced and cited properly (and it builds credibility for your own studies).

But how does this apply to creative writing, or indeed any creative medium? Obviously you don’t see footnotes for every source of inspiration in popular fiction across creative media, and it’s not like magical schools are banned from fiction because JK Rowling wrote a series about such a place. How do the rules of plagiarism of ideas that have a clear guideline in formal writing adapt to the creative arts?

To answer this question I am first going to turn to the modern legal system. Every country has its own set of laws regarding the protection of original works and ideas, but for the sake of ease the following is based on US laws and definitions. If you’re interested in your own country’s specific laws (and how they differ from what is stated here) I recommend a quick Google search.

Copyright is a concept that puts some (but not all) acts of plagiarism into a legal liability. It came into form as the printing press (and printed works) became more popular, but has grown significantly over the past 150 years as new technology and new ways to distribute media have come into play. As Wikipedia succinctly summarizes, “In law, copyright is the exclusive right, given to the creator of a work, to reproduce the work, usually for a limited time. Copyright protects the original expression of an idea in the form of a creative work, but not the idea itself. A copyright is subject to limitations based on public interest considerations, such as the fairuse doctrine in the United States.” This is how parody and criticism are protected, for instance.

It’s important to note that copyright protects the specifics, but not the actual idea. For instance, Marvel (and thus, Disney) have the copyright to the story of Stephen Strange, the arrogant surgeon that had a terrible car crash and went to Kamar-Taj and learned the ways of the Mystic Arts. However, if someone were to write about Trevor Baker, the arrogant baseball player that lost his arm in a car accident and went to a secret society in Japan to learn magic to become a sorcerer, there is no copyright protection. The idea is the same (and perhaps plagiarized), but there is enough difference to make it its own work.

You may note that, under that copyright definition and the current state of US law, all fanfiction are copyright infringements. Alongside that, all fanfiction can be considered a plagiarism of ideas in the eyes of some original creators. However, you’ll find that most authors, studios, and creative organizations are tolerant and sometimes encouraging of fanfiction and other fan-derived works so long as it’s not done for profit and clearly stated to be a fan-derived work (one time commissionsseem to be a grey area that most seem okay with, but something like art prints of copyrighted or trademarked characters is not something I’ve found definite rules for, and I imagine that it is also on a case by case basis; publishing written fanfiction works widely for profit is a big no for most creators). For more on this subject and how fan-derived works have fared legally, take a look at this wiki article, which mostly looks at cases within the United States but is still an interesting read. For more details about specific cases you can go to the sources linked.

You’ll note that, since copyright law does not protect ideas, that it doesn’t really fall into the scenario prompted in the original ask. The reason I bring up copyright is that it is important to recognize the differences between copyright and plagiarism.

I think Sara F Hawkins (an actual attorney, unlike me) states it best in her article about it. She has a whole list of the differences between copyright and plagiarism, but I think for the sake of this topic, this point is especially relevant to us: “Plagiarism is a violation of moral, ethical, or organization norms not laws.”

So let’s look at this case from those three viewpoints (for the sake of ease, I am using this definition to show the difference between ethics and morals. I don’t know if it’s right, but it’s useful).

Moral: The plagiarism of ideas and where it stands on a moral ground really varies from person to person. For instance, one may accuse me of plagiarizing @amethyst-noir‘s ideas with the embellished or different spins on the prompts and asks received in her inbox. However, my moral stance would be that this falls into inspiration rather than plagiarism because there is enough of my own work within these prompts. This is a stronger argument as I also have her full support (as well as the support of a couple of the anons), but even if I didn’t, I think that if you put enough of your own spin onto the base of an idea, you craft it enough to make it your own. Many, many stories follow the same general plot lines and tropes; that does not mean they are all plagiarizing each other. Furthermore, the original ask makes it sound like you, anon, did not know this story existed after crafting the outline, making the argument null. How can you plagiarize something you did not know existed? You can’t, not from a moral standpoint.

Ethical: Unfortunately this one is a bit harder and the one you seem most concerned about. There is no one culture amongst the fan fiction community, and even every fandom has its own set of different communities with their own sets of norms, leaving this not entirely possible to predict. Instead I would rather critically examine the key plot points that are the same as this writer and figure out if they are relatively common tropes or entirely too specific to each other. For instance, if there’s a kidnapping, that’s in half the fiction out there. It’s way too broad a trope to be considered an idea one can really plagiarize. However, if both your story and theirs feature a kidnapping of the same character in the same spot with the same method after a very similar series of events, then there may be more people that see the similarities between them.If you want to take precaution against overzealous fans of the other work, upon publication of your own story, you can outright mention that you found a work similar to yours well after beginning your story and that any similarities are unintentional, with a link and a positive plug to the story in particular. You could even reach out to the author themselves before publishing, but I don’t think this is necessary, especially since you are crossing over a wholly different world (which already distinguishes itself as a different piece of work in regards to the base idea in most cases).

Organization: The authority on transformative works is usually considered to be AO3. AO3 would not pull a work for very similar ideas; if that were the case, the hurt/comfort, chatroom, and E-rating categories would be much, much smaller than they are now. So no worries on that end.

I cannot predict the behavior of your reviewers, anon, and without specifics I cannot say how similar your work is to this work already published, but I hope that everything I outlined above gives you an idea of where to go from here.

I am going to end this essay of an answer with something I found in my research on this subject. I came across this fantastic article by a Jonathan Bailey about the plagiarism of ideas and how they apply in US patent law (unlike copyright law, you can patent ideas), and what it would mean for the creative space if they were applied similarly. I recommend reading the whole article, but this passage especially stood out to me:

The best thing that we can do is realize that, in the eyes of the law, the value of a creative work is in its execution, not the idea behind it. As such, we have to take it upon ourselves not only to be original, but to carry out our visions the best possible way.

I think that should be a mantra everyone working with both original and derivative works should take to heart. Supposedly every story has already been told, so we may as well just tell the stories with our own spin, in our own words, and our own specific ideas that make them distinctly ours. That is how we make them unique and memorable.

#fanfiction #fanfic #fan fiction #writing #plagiarism #copyright #ao3 #ask #answered #Anonymous #long post

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imsarythings · 7 years ago

Text

ABOUT LOST(My Original Charather):

Who is She?

Firstly, it is a Black Emerald. The black emeralds were created by a goddess (who will soon know who she is) which gave them the objective of black emeralds, absorbing all kinds of energy that was around. However, the goddess decided to create them a pure body, with feminine basis, as if they were her daughters, the small body of Lost was so small (like her sisters, other emeralds more created by the goddess) that the goddess was like a be gigantic for them.

Lost It was not unique among his sisters, All his sisters, had the same design as lost, the most curious, was that each black emerald that existed and was created next By the unknown goddess, received a negative name: "Pain" "Suffering" "Dispair" "Fail", Etc.

Lost was born in the fourth century, just the world was starting at that time, Although Lost never could know that place called land, or water. this was the most curious of these creatures, they feel Absolutely Nothing.

Can not feel heat, cold, Empathy, Love, Sadness, Sweetheart. Nothing. It is an emerald, It has no feelings Or someone to teach them, Only had a single purpose, To be with his mother.

Lost (Current Design)

Lost Appearance:

Female Body (Nude, It has no feminine Intimidades to cover, It is an Emerald).

Black non-asymmetric stripes on his body, gray hair, deeply black eyes (which shine when the light gives them)

Lost Personality:

Patient, Quiet, Calm And Neutral. When you do not feel feelings in your energy, you do not have to look angry or sad. He always knows what to say In every moment. She is kind, she does not define between good and evil, she is not on any side, she is only observing the world that surrounds her.

He loves to explore unknown places, even if it is dangerous. He wants to see what caused such a disturbance. No matter what the situation, he will never change that expression that is so serious on his face. just smile when she decides.

The Powers of Lost:

ATTENTION, THIS IS SPOILER TO THE PAST (COMPLETE HISTORY) OF LOST. (I still do not think the story Post, this is to know her better)

The powers of Lost are Unlimited, I could not put names to them. Firstly in Defense, It only uses to Dodge its opponent's attacks quickly. It prefers to simply watch patiently as it attacks its opponent.

Its attack powers consist of Bubbles, Explosive Bubbles that it uses as an attack to its opponent, When Exploding a Wave quite powerful it expands Damaging and destroying Everything around it.

He has super strength and Speed, He knows what to do when attacking, Having no sense of doubt makes him Give him the goal of winning The fight that is proposed. (depending on the situation, obviously)

Clarifications

—Lost has a lot of energy in her emerald, so much that makes her look like a semi-goddess, she still does not have enough energy to call herself a complete goddess, but she is not someone you should challenge

—A very powerful attack That receives Lost, Will Regenate his body, But she will not bleed because She does not carry blood, her only vitality of life is her esmerald, Her body is the vessel that protects her Emerald, if it is broken It will regenerate In time, Not hesitate.

(For this clarification I base a little On a certain character I like a lot)

Anime: To Aru Majutsu No Index.) Hyouka Kazakiri

—If Lost It's hurt. This way their wounds will be seen as they come in the images. I hope you understand the reference. it is not any Plagiarism towards the character.

lost It's a different being. Just base me on your head breaks to understand how it would look like if they broke your body. and yes, His Emerald is in his head.

The End.

If something here I'm not clear, You can stop by my Tumblr and Ask me and I'll clarify your doubts. Thanks for reading this post ❤

I clarify, The story of Lost has not yet been uploaded, It is in process, I will notify when it will be published, Thank you ~

#faq #about lost #my original characters #my original art #angelicabb #original

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anonymoustalks · 5 years ago

Text

do multiculturalism and small religious cult based on the concept of love towards your neighbor run by mentally ill people make it more diverse?

(6-18-20) You both like history.

Stranger: Hey

You: hiya

Stranger: Hello

Stranger: Hi

You: another hi wow ^^

You: very... hello-y

Stranger: Halló

You: why we say hello?

Stranger: to greet each other

You: are greeting important?

Stranger: no it's more important to salute than greet

Stranger: let's perform the Roman salute together

You: ;-; but dunwanna

Stranger: why not?Dont you share my war-like Roman spirit?

You: no, I am primitive

Stranger: filthy barbarian, too uncivilized to salute

You: yup ^^

You: I am one with nature

Stranger: do you put up irminsuls everywhere

You: oh that would be fun

You: that's a good idea

Stranger: it didnt end well for those who thought it'd be a good idea

You: it's okay

You: my faith is more important

Stranger: slaughtered by Charlemagne's frankish knights, forced to convert...

Stranger: do you sleep well

You: sure! ^^

You: do you?

Stranger: Yes of course

You: okay that's good

Stranger: what history do you like?

You: mhm, I kind of just forgot to remove this tag lol

Stranger: why did you tag history??

You: I wanted to learn about the balkans

Stranger: about the powder keg of Europe...okay

Stranger: but what period?

You: 1999 ish

You: yugoslavia basically

Stranger: oh the yugoslav war

Stranger: there was a great deal of ethnic tension between ethnic serbs and albanians they started cleansing each other NATO intervened and bombarded Yugoslav cities with DEPLETED URANIUAM as a result Yugoslavia got dismembered

Stranger: oh right

You: sounds like a good summary

You: also why with depleted uranium?

Stranger: many serbs still have cancer because of depleted uranium

Stranger: the type of bombs they used

You: oh

Stranger: I still cant understand why your dad beats you.

You: that's quite a change of topic lol

Stranger: Why does he beat you?

You: mhm because I'm a pagan

Stranger: no pagan would refer to themselves as pagan

You: it's okay, I have my own idea of paganism

Stranger: it means "a commoner" in latin

You: (don't worry I got this!)

Stranger: I hate you

You: :c

You: I feel sad now

Stranger: you're terrible.

You: D:

You: how can I become un-terrible?

Stranger: bring yourself into a permament state of non existence

You: is that nihilism?

Stranger: No its not nihilism -_-

You: okay sorry ^^

Stranger: oh speaking of words starting with nihil

Stranger: have you heard of ex nihilo

You: nope!

You: my linguistic skills are subpar!

Stranger: do you speak Latin

You: nope!

You: I would prefer to learn birdspeech

Stranger: Mao ordered the killing of all sparrows in China.

You: D: that's so sad!!

You: why?!

Stranger: he thought they were pests.

You: that's terrible

Stranger: Yeah

You: humans are more like pests

You: they've infested the planet

Stranger: thats so

Stranger: misanthropic

You: is that bad?

Stranger: it does reflect the actual state of affairs but its still misanthropic

You: I'm sorry if I offended you

Stranger: I just said its misanthropic

Stranger: I am not offended

You: oh okay, good

Stranger: given I am just a small larva not a human

You: oh you are a small human?

Stranger: are you implying small humans(in other words children) are larvae?

You: hm?

Stranger: Oh nvm my mind twisted this a bit

You: I mean children are neither eggs nor adults

Stranger: right

Stranger: do you like shouty children

You: mhm I think they are fine

You: children are being children

You: it's kind of natural I think

Stranger: so you said humans have infested the planet implying humans are evil. are they naturally evil or are they corrupted by society

You: mhm, I don't think any animals are intrinsically good or evil

You: but if there are a lot of them than it is an infestation

Stranger: so corrupted by society?

You: sure we can go with that

Stranger: Oh are you a Rousseauist

Stranger: you spoke of nature and so on

You: oh, I am not that sophisticated

You: I am a pagan

Stranger: shut up

You: sorry >.<

You: but I'm seriously not that sophisticated

Stranger: I know

Stranger: I ken that

You: *headtilt*

Stranger: I must kithe you that I am a mammal.

You: okay

You: I like mammals

Stranger: I must kithe you that I partook in the colonial partition of Africa.

You: oh how old are you?

Stranger: Oldish

You: I wonder how old your mitochondria are

Stranger: wait do you use numbers to measure age

You: idk

You: units of measurement are a social construct

Stranger: so...?

You: numbers are fine

Stranger: should we establish institutions that encourage people to use numbers to describe age

You: I don't know, what do you think?

Stranger: I have no opinion on that

Stranger: should we establish institutitoons of royal power

You: it is hard for me to grasp the concept of royal power

You: or royalty

Stranger: divine right

Stranger: the grace of god

You: can you explain god to me?

Stranger: when discussing Kings and how they justify their power the only God is the biblical one

You: I see

You: I feel like it must have sounded very strange to the pagans

Stranger: No it didnt

Stranger: Ceaser claimed to have descended from Jupiter

Stranger: CAESAR SORRY

You: I think it would have gotten weirder if they went to asia

Stranger: they had local rulers that also justified their rule with similar concepts

Stranger: it wanst all too different throughout the world

You: I think many of them had local gods

Stranger: obviously

Stranger: in almost all polytheistic religions there is an archgod though

Stranger: the god of all gods

You: I think I would prefer to reject gods and stay with my trees

Stranger: until the trees get cut down

You: why are you so mean?

Stranger: I am not going to lie about the harsh realities of this world

You: but you can change the world

Stranger: to what extent?

Stranger: and in what direction?

You: idk, that's up to you

Stranger: you can change the world

You: yup ^^

Stranger: you change the world

You: yup ^^

Stranger: does this sound motivating

You: it sounds depressingly motivating by being not actually motivating lol

Stranger: not so good then

You: no it's probably fine

Stranger: you can change the world for the worse

Stranger: does this sound motivating

You: it sounds motivating through its pessimissim

Stranger: I've never found pessimism motivating

You: mhm, really?

Stranger: especially given the etymology of the word

You: hmm

Stranger: are you thinking

You: idk, probably not anything productive

Stranger: do you like reflecting in bed

You: it's not a bad place to reflect

You: sometimes, I think if I had been born 100 years ago, I would have been very religious

You: but wasn't

You: and now I have a lot of misplaced faith

You: that I don' know what to do with

Stranger: well...right the conventions of the Edwardian era were quite rigid so you had to be religious

You: I should just make my own religion I guess

Stranger: oh no

You: is that bad?

Stranger: you intend to become a cult leader

You: a cult is only bad if you manipulate your cult members

You: otherwise it's just called an ordinary religion

Stranger: so?is there any guarantee that you wont use other believers to build up your own power base?

You: I don't think I need any power

You: we should give our love to the world that surrounds us

Stranger: thats what Christianity says

You: yes but I dont believe in any god

You: so I can't be christian unfortunately

Stranger: so you need a religion as a set of practices that promote the love your neighbor thing

You: good things are made by plagiarizing ^^

You: mhm, I don't think it's bad if someone made a church and community for these beliefs?

You: you can help other people in your church and support them

You: and overall just feel nice in a community

Stranger: Sounds so rosy

You: yup{

You: ^^

Stranger: well...not sure this would gain any traction considering people already have similar religions except that they have a God and idolatry is important in our culture you know

You: yes, it is sad... I guess I will jut have to be alone then :c

You: but I have my faith!

You: I guess there just won't be many others...

Stranger: when you say something about faith I always think of crusades really even though that isnt even remotely what you mean

You: hmm?

You: what I mean by faith is believing in something even when there is no evidence to suggest you should believe in it

You: for instance, there is no reason you should believe that your neighbor will not steal from you

You: but faith is trusting that they will not

Stranger: yeah but I mean when you say the first that come to mind "religious fanaticisism, the defender of the faith status, the conquest of "divine" fiefs"

You: lol ^^

Stranger: say that*

You: I guess I just ended up defining faith for myself somehow I guess

Stranger: Its just because the idea of fighting for faith is quite common

Stranger: oh nvm

Stranger: my mind perverts everything

You: huh?

Stranger: Just never mind

You: oh okay

Stranger: Sorry

You: hm? why are you sorry?

You: you have nothing to be sorry about

Stranger: Yeah right

Stranger: so yeah I like the crusades ofc did you know that the first crusade was the only successful crusaaade

You: I didn't know!

Stranger: wait I think I got carried away with all these crusades

You: although I think it depends on your side

Stranger: I mean there never were any "muslim crusades"

Stranger: they use a different term

You: but I mean the all attacke jerusalem?

You: *they all

You: at different points in history

Stranger: Well yes

Stranger: the holy land right

You: yup

Stranger: but actually Judea has always been plagued with bloodshed

Stranger: when Hadrian was Roman emperor Jews rebelled against Roman rule and commited genocide against Romans

Stranger: based on religion

You: killing is mean

Stranger: you can see similar stuff happening nowadays

Stranger: its effectively the most restless spot in the world

You: mhm

You: although sometimes I wonder how it compares to Sudan

Stranger: what about it?

You: idk if the palestinian area is worse, or if it's a matter of we just pay more attention to it

You: or if there are also places elsewhere in the world that are worse/very bad

Stranger: well the conflict there has been around for a long time and its an ethno religious conflict thats why we pay so much attention to it

Stranger: and also Israel may possess nuclear weapons

Stranger: which is also why some people are concerned about the current situation in the middle east

Stranger: oh and also Trump supports Israel which is also why some people are ever more concerned about Israel

You: hmm

Stranger: and also the jews are considered one of the most oppressed people on Earth

Stranger: oh wtf am I saying

You: hm?

Stranger: no nvm

Stranger: Sorry

You: okay

Stranger: But again Hadrian banned the Torah law

Stranger: and

Stranger: many jews were sold into slavery

Stranger: and they were banned from practicing their religion

Stranger: oh I like Hadrian so much

Stranger: He did so much good for Rome

You: I just feel like I only know the wall that's named after him

Stranger: and the city

Stranger: Adrionople

You: hadrian... remove the H?

Stranger: In some languages H is silent thats why

You: oh okay

Stranger: its quite weak in English as well

Stranger: in French it doesnt exist at all

Stranger: although its still used in writing because the spelling is a mess

You: language can get weird

Stranger: well yes especially if its Germanized vulgar latin that borrowed lots of frankish vocabularly from an old dutch superstrate

You: I guess a lot of people migrated and moved around ^^

Stranger: Yeah obviously thats how the salic franks came to rule over Gaul

Stranger: OH AND they wrote the salic law

Stranger: they wrote the salic law

Stranger: !!!

Stranger: they wrote the salic law

You: you sound really excited ^^

Stranger: No its actually very important the salic law caused at least 3 wars

You: oh wow

Stranger: why....why history???

You: did you just read something new?

Stranger: no really

Stranger: why did you tag history

You: I forgot to remove the tag since I just wanted to learn about the balkans

Stranger: do you generally talk about history

You: hmm I talk about anything really

Stranger: oh where are you from?

You: us east

Stranger: Pensylvania?

You: nope!

You: that's pretty specific

Stranger: Constantinople?

You: even more specific lol

Stranger: Virginia?

Stranger: see I am good at geography

You: constantinople, idk if there's a us city of that name

Stranger: well I didnt mean it in a serious way

Stranger: are you from Virginia?

You: nope

Stranger: Washington?

You: I feel like I should stop answering because you will guess it eventually lol ^^

Stranger: did I guess it though?

You: I plead the fifth!

Stranger: Oh but you should definitely rename your hometown Constantinople because it sounds more Christian than anything

You: well there are a bunch of places with strange names

Stranger: Trumpoletania?

You: is that an actual place?

Stranger: no just my imagination and alternative present

You: Maybe in 100 years

You: and they continue to name avenues after US presidents

Stranger: i

Stranger: do

Stranger: la

Stranger: try

You: lol

Stranger: even those that owned slaves?

You: are you protestant or is this a modern revulsion of idolatry?

You: they all owned slaves

You: this is america

Stranger: well the presidents that held the position before the civil war did

You: yes and most of the streets named after presidents are usually after the "founding fathers"

Stranger: well thats still idolatry

You: is idolatry bad in your moral-ethical compass of things?

Stranger: and those people didnt embody all the things that the modern day US claims to embody

Stranger: No not necessarily

You: oh okay, I'm just curious

You: because all forms of commemoration can be interpreted as a kind of idolatry

You: well, frankly its in the eyes of the beholder

Stranger: well when you have a large statue of Stalin in front of your house then its obviously idolatry

Stranger: and I do want a statue like that

Stranger: to idolize the greatest leader of the USSR

Stranger: see I dont see idolatry as necessarily bad

You: mhm but it's different depending on if you commissioned the statue or if someone else visits your statue 100 years in the future

You: the meaning can change in the eyes of the beholder

Stranger: well the only difference is how many people are affected by the cult of personality

You: fair enough

Stranger: I think in the US there should be a few statues of Stalin

Stranger: privately owned ones at least

You: lol

You: I'm not always sure why I understand people idolize people

Stranger: why are you so alien

You: because I clearly can't speak english

You: ^^;;;;

You: how is it possible to type something and have the words come out all in the wrong order?

Stranger: just like any other human you should understand why people idolize other people and elevate them above others

Stranger: dyslexia

You: are there more people that you idolize?

Stranger: Lenin,Marx,Ernst Thalmann,Niccolo Machiavelli, Pinochet and Mussolini

You: that's such a nice spread

Stranger: oh wait no

Stranger: I dont like Machiavelli Pinochet or Mussolini

You: oh that's too bad

Stranger: why

You: idk, it's good to like a diversity of things I think

Stranger: it depends actually

Stranger: is the world diverse?

You: diversity is a strange word and I don't know how to process it

Stranger: Mussolini could process it easily

You: ^^

Stranger: shut up

You: :c

Stranger: is the world diverse

Stranger: answer me or face my wrath

You: umm... yes...?

Stranger: do multiculturalism and small religious cult based on the concept of love towards your neighbor run by mentally ill people make it more diverse?

Stranger: cults*

You: hmm maybe?

You: I think it is a bit abstract to quantify diversity

Stranger: I think it's a bit abstract to quantify numbers

You: lol ^^

Stranger: you cant counter my statement

You: of course

Stranger: you lose

You: it's okay, I think it can be fun to lose sometimes

Stranger: thats an overromanticized idea created to make up for the horrors of losing

You: mhm the way I would analyze it is probably as a reactionary sentiment towards the competitiveness of modern culture?

Stranger: competitiveness of modern culture? what do you mean by modern culture?popular culture?

You: mhm gaming pops into my mind immediately

You: or the set of sentiments related to that kind of competitiveness for fun

Stranger: well this is unrelated to what we were discussing a few minutes ago though and is merely part of some cultures

Stranger: not all of them ofc

You: yup, it's unrelated

Stranger: are you irrelevant

You: sorry!

Stranger: thats a genuine question

You: oh I read it backwards lol

You: "you are irrelevant" lol

Stranger: seems like you are used to insults

You: mhm probably~

Stranger: but, are you irrelevant?

You: I think it depends on your frame of reference?

You: I suppose I must be relevant to myself

You: I have no idea if I'm relevant to others though

Stranger: Okay let me put it this way. Why do your parents consider you to be irrelevant?

You: hopefully not!

Stranger: but they do

Stranger: that's a well-known fact

You: okay go on

Stranger: No that's all I've got to say about your irrelevant now tell me, why do your parents deem you irrelevant

Stranger: irrelevance

You: um, apparently this is news to me, so I was hoping you could explain

You: that said, it's really hard for me to know what other people think

You: because um, I'm not them

Stranger: harness the power of lightning and use it to develop an ability to read human minds

You: is that a reference towards electricity and.... idk what technology

Stranger: Perhaps

You: I dunno, I don't know a lot of things

Stranger: that's true

Stranger: you know very few things

You: yup

Stranger: But it's perfectly okay to be ignorant

Stranger: I know a lot of ignorant people

Stranger: who I am very good friends with

You: okay

Stranger: you're ignorant.

You: I don't really mind that much tbh

Stranger: you are ignorant

You: mhm

Stranger: you are ignorant

You: why are you repeating it?

Stranger: you are doomed to be ignorant forever

You: I don't really see ignorance as an absolute though?

Stranger: because I've been told that psychological abuse works like this

Stranger: well I deal in absolutes.

You: oh, were you experimenting with something?

Stranger: Yeah, with neo-absolutism and its psychological basis

You: I'm not totally sure how to reconcile that statement

Stranger: The gracchi brothers tried to reconcile the senate and the roman people after an inflow of unpaid slave labor and cheap grain bankrupted the small farmers

Stranger: But to no avail

Stranger: disgruntled senators assassinated the gracchi brothers and thousands of their allies

You: that's a bit sad

Stranger: yep just like your life

You: I'm quite happy with my life actually

Stranger: you arent

You: hm? how so?

Stranger: You are constantly told that you're a failure

You: I was wondering why you changed the topic to "why your dad beats you" earlier?

Stranger: Oh I was trying to help you with your family problems

You: oh, I don't live with my parents though

Stranger: why not

Stranger: you should leech off your parents

You: idk because I don't need to?

Stranger: why not??

Stranger: you can ask your parents to subsidize Malta

You: I dunno, I don't need to

You: I wonder why I don't do things I don't need to do

Stranger: why dont you want Malta subsidized

You: because I am selfish

Stranger: what's the etymology of the word selfish?

You: self-ish?

You: sell-fish?

Stranger: in the past the self part meant "I" (similar to the greek word ego) so in Old English they said "ic self" in middle english it came to mean "a person who has no identity"

Stranger: and I think when you say selfish

Stranger: you mean that you have no identity

Stranger: that somebody has stripped you of your identity

You: okay, I can live with that I guess

Stranger: and now you're lost,trying to make your life meaningful

Stranger: but decades of degeneratation have affected you

Stranger: what creates degeneracy?

You: I dunno~

Stranger: you're not smart :/

You: I thought we established that earlier?

Stranger: we didnt

Stranger: you're not smart :////

You: lol okay

You: I wonder what creates degeneracy

Stranger: keep wondering

Stranger: perhaps one day you will find your answers

You: mhm okay ^^

Stranger: you aren't smart

You: yup

Stranger: you aren't smart

You: you really like the repeating thing

Stranger: its really interesting that when you had to choose between shame and arguing you chose shame you know I am a psychology graduate(graduated 2 years ago) and this is actually a sign of a weak personality

You: ohh that's really cool!

You: also congrats

You: I don't mind having a weak personality

Stranger: you're a weakling

You: lol

Stranger: look at yourself

You: I think you are probably affirming a component of my identity?

Stranger: you cant even lift a table

You: maybe that is why you are not getting as much of a reaction?

Stranger: of a reaction?

Stranger: this is a bit out of place

You: hm?

Stranger: I am trying to help you with your mental problems

You: oh okay

You: I thought you were repeating because you were expecting me to say something different

Stranger: that too since this would give me some info about your retention character

You: (retention character, meaning...?)

Stranger: google it, I wont tell you since I realize that you must learn to find all sorts of helpful information on your own

You: I feel like I am not heading in the right direction with googling "retention character"

Stranger: wanna know why I chose that term?

You: why?

Stranger: Its probably the least popular term outlined in the book "the interpretation of dreams" by Sigmund Freud and I am well aware that it doesnt have a wikipedia page so you'll have to skim over the book and maybe you'll find it there

You: oh okay

Stranger: you must learn that sometimes its very hard to acquire useful information

You: I guess so

Stranger: I am beginning to think that you have trouble learning

Stranger: not dyslexia but something different

You: mhm can you elaborate more?

Stranger: No. You have to process my ever word and muster all of your brain power to get your answers

You: aww, I would appreciate it if you just said it ^^

Stranger: No. You must learn how hard it is to obtain information

Stranger: I am trying to help you.

Stranger: stop resisting

You: Okay, I'm a bit lazy though

You: or maybe I am lazy today

Stranger: thats the problem

You: I am unclear about how I am resisting

Stranger: you are always lazy

You: okay that is probably true too

Stranger: ignorant, lazy and pitiful

You: I dunno about pitiful

Stranger: I feel sad for you

You: although I guess from an external party I guess that is possible

You: it's okay you don't need to feel sad

You: I'm quite happy

Stranger: you aren't

Stranger: stop lying

You: I try very hard not to lie

Stranger: the biggest lie I've heard from you so far

You: hm?

Stranger: is you say

Stranger: ing

Stranger: that

Stranger: you try very hard not to lie

Stranger: an ignorant

Stranger: lazy

Stranger: liar

You: okay, I'm not totally sure if I am following

Stranger: its okay

You: but if you think that way it's fine too ^^

Stranger: wait I think I know why you disgust some people

Stranger: especially your parents

You: go on

Stranger: you are ignorant and lie too much

You: mhm I'm a little bit unsure how people can tell what are lies though

You: but yes I am ignorant

Stranger: some can some cant

Stranger: I can

You: okay that's pretty nice intuition

Stranger: not intuition you dumb fucker

You: hm? what then?

Stranger: you've got be more careful about what you say

Stranger: because about 70% of what you say is gibberish

You: oh... I'm sorry then

You: I guess I should try to be clearer?

Stranger: you say intuition when its the critical method

You: ah okay

Stranger: No you should stop speaking. At all

You: I didn't know

Stranger: for about a month

Stranger: and then start speaking again

You: I don't really want to do that

Stranger: but in a more reserved manner

You: how do I speak more reserved?

Stranger: First of all throw words that you most commonly use away they are the worst and they make you sound dumb and ignorant so dont say nihilism (this is what you say in almost every situation) dont say unsure because this makes you sound uncertain and thus weak and silly

You: is it bad to sound weak/uncertain?

Stranger: it isnt bad to sound uncertain when its justified

Stranger: but you're literally both dumb and uncertain

You: mhm, but I don't really understand why strength is valued as a virtue

Stranger: It isnt valued as a virtue you moron

Stranger: you seek opposites

You: huh?

Stranger: thats a retarded way of thinking

You: can you explain more?

Stranger: "can you explaim more" is the backbone of your everyday vocabularly

Stranger: throw it away

You: mhm but I don't always understand things, and it would be helpful if people clarified their statement

Stranger: you never seek answers. you want others to find them for you

Stranger: thats why you're so dumb by the way

Stranger: so get rid of it

Stranger: you dont need that phrase

Stranger: imbecile

You: is the a better way to ask for feedback?

Stranger: You dont need feedback at all. Forget about feedback. You should never request feedback

You: mhm why?

Stranger: "why" get rid of this

You: I feel like it is hard to justify doing something unless you know the reason

Stranger: another rule you should apply

Stranger: Dont argue with people who are much better than you

You: I didn't realize I was arguing you though...

You: I thought I was just asking for an explanation

Stranger: I told you to get rid of "why" in your speech and you tried to justify using why

You: ah okay

Stranger: throwing arguments at the interlocutor creates an argument

Stranger: fool

You: I don't really feel like doing the things you are suggesting though

Stranger: buffoon

You: I'm sorry if it seems disrepectful

Stranger: clown

You: I feel like clowns are kind of scary actually

You: I don't really understand why they are invited to birthday parties

Stranger: your behavior is that of a clown

Stranger: but it isnt scary

You: hmm, clowns are for generating entertainment and laughter?

Stranger: yep thats why you usually try to but it doesnt really make you seem funny when you're required to hold a proper conversation

You: sorry

Stranger: try to do

Stranger: idiot

Stranger: shame on you

Stranger: shamee

You: I don't understand shame in all of its aspects actually

Stranger: Shame

Stranger: on you

You: is the meaning of that phrase that I should feel shame, even though I don't?

Stranger: shame on you

You: ^^ okay

Stranger: clown

You: you seem to be very patient

Stranger: you've gone so boring...

You: sorry

You: I think I just have difficulty understanding you

You: I'm not always sure when you are being sincere vs. just having fun

Stranger: are you going to bring something interesting into the convo

You: umm I'm not sure I know what you consider to be interesting

You: I can guess at things

You: also is it late for you?

You: sorry if I've kept you up

You: I know I took a lot of your time

Stranger: lol I wouldnt damage my sleep pattern because of people like you

You: okay that's good ^^

Stranger: the only reason Ive been talking to you is boredom but as I already mentioned you've become very very boring

Stranger: so I have to wish you a happy life and say goodbye

You: sorry

You: okay you too

You: I wish you the best

Stranger: byeeeeeeeeeeee

Stranger has disconnected.

#omegle #history #religion #roman history #cults #jerusalem #crusade #ignorance #mental illness #faith #I was acting a bit silly here and this conversation was very strange

0 notes

alward4005 · 6 years ago

Text

INITIAL SET OF 30 TIPS

01. Set Realistic Expectations

We can’t all be Meghan Markle, so it may be best to let go of your fantasy of marrying a prince.

02. Don’t Settle Either, Know Your Worth

With the previous tip being said, determined qualities in a partner that you are absolutely set on.

List of the qualities I look for in a guy + blank list for people to add in their own

03. Don’t EVER Do Anything That You Don’t Want To Do

If a guy tries to tell you that you have to do something to be with him, he’s not a quality man

04. Don’t Allow Yourself to be Fetishized

The gay community has a tendency to fetishize people for a multitude of different reasons. But, you shouldn’t attempt to enter a relationship with someone who is only with you based off of specific physical characteristics.

05. Not All Attention is Good Attention

Get off of Grindr if you’re looking for a relationship. I myself have been sucked into it countless times, but none of the men I have met off of that app have truly been looking for a relationship.

06. Don’t Be Afraid to Say No

This can apply to literally anything. If you don’t want to go on a date with someone, say no. If you don’t want to go back to someone’s place after a date, say no. If you don’t want someone to kiss you, say no. I promise you, you’ll feel a million times worse if you just stay silent.

07. Go to Queer-Positive Spaces to Meet People

If you’re in school, join the LGBT club or start one! Having a chance to meet other members of your community in a space that is not sexualized is incredibly refreshing.

If not, depending on where you live there may be LGBT community groups that you can also join.

08. Use York Friends to See Guys

In my personal experience, guys are generally on better behaviour when they know that you’ll be telling one of their friends if they’re an asshole.

09. Grindr, No. Tinder, Yes.

Tinder is notorious amongst the straight community for being a hookup app. Luckily for the gays, we already have one of those. Therefore, Tinder is primarily used as an app for those who are more LTR oriented.

10. Utilize the Block Button

There are men who are on these dating/hookup apps purely to stir up shit. They’re going to fight with you over the craziest things and it is just not worth your energy. You’re not going to change anyone’s mind through a text message, nor should you have to.

11. Keep Statistics Off Your Profile

Yes these apps are superficial, but don’t give users even more reason to be. By including things like your height and weight you’re likely only going to meet people who are looking for a specific body type. In my experience, those guys don’t make great boyfriends.

12. Use Your Best Photo

As bad as this sounds, the better your photos (I say photos, because you should definitely include more than one whenever applicable) the more matches you’re going to get. When someone takes a photo where they’re mid blink in a dark room, that scares people off.

Also, make sure your images project what you’re looking for.

13. Bios Are Used to Break the Ice

If you struggle with being creative when talking about yourself find a tweet or a tumblr text post that you feel represents you and use that! No one is going to call out your plagiarism on dating apps.

Mine is “I don’t need a man, but where is he?” And I’ve had countless men reply with “Here I am”

14. YOU Message First

Compliments are also a great way to start a conversation and people tend to be more likely to respond to “Your eyes are so pretty” over “Hey”

15. Be Patient with Those Who are Not Out

That being said, if you’re someone like me who is clearly gay maybe you’re not the best partner for them, at least at this point in their life.

16. Don’t Cling to The First Guy Who Shows Interest

Especially in small towns it seems as though as soon as you find someone else who’s also interested in the same sex you need to immediately start dating. You might not be right for each other, and I promise there are always more options out there.

17. Long Distance Disasters

For example, if someone is moving away to go to school, but will be back each summer you can probably make that work.

18. Deciphering Cryptic Messages

“I’m pretty open” — I’m most likely a fuckboy

“I like to go with the flow” — I’m most likely a fuckboy

“We should chill sometime” — I’m most likely a fuckboy

“I’m just curious, are you a top or a bottom” — I’m definitely a fuckboy

“Oops I didn’t mean to send that dick pic” — I’m definitely a fuckboy

19. Do Not Use Dating Apps Past 9pm

People tend to get a little twirly* beyond this time. You won’t be meeting super quality men on here beyond this period, unless of course you too are looking for sex.

20. Follow Local Gays on Instagram

This is a good, relatively harmless way, of getting more well known in your own community. Although sometimes things go down in the DMs, it is also possible that you can make friends this way.

21. Prioritize Interests Over Appearance

Obviously it makes sense to go out with someone that you find physically attractive, I am in no way negating that. However, if the two of you have absolutely not shared interests, you’re going to really struggle, especially in the long run.

22. Don’t Ghost

This may sound obvious, but when you’ve gone on a disaster date, or when someone has stronger feels for you than you do, it’s so much easier to just disappear. This is never the best way to go about ending a relationship at any stage.

23. Don’t Compare Yourself to a Partner’s Ex(es)

It’s easy to compare yourself to a partner’s exes, and if you’re doing this in a way that makes you feel inferior you’re really just playing yourself. Keep in mind, even if you think an ex is prettier, smarter or more successful than you, it didn’t work out between them. Obviously, they’re not as perfect as you think they are.

24. Don’t Backslide

Similarly to the previous piece of advice, if you ever consider getting back together make sure you know what you’re doing. Often relationship end for a reason, and sometimes it’s just that you two weren’t compatible. Although it is easy to backslide to someone you have history with, make sure you remind yourself of why it didn’t work in the first place.

25. Don’t Compare Your Relationships to Anyone Else’s

Personally, I have a lot of straight girl friends who seemingly fall into relationships with very minimal effort on their behalf. It is important to remind yourself that every situation is different. There’s no point in getting upset, just focus on yourself.

26. Stop Looking

I have never followed this advice on purpose, but I have found the less I actively pursue a relationship, the more likely I am to find someone. I think this is because when you’re actively looking you give off a desperate vibe that scares guys off. I’m not telling you to turn to hookups, or to cut guys off all together, maybe just be content with some casual dating for a bit.

27. Limit the Number of Guys in Your Rotation

A rotation means something different to everyone. Often times it refers to the amount of sexual partners that you have on hand, whether they be friends with benefits or fuck buddies. I use it more to talk about the amount of guys I am seriously talking to. Make sure it is not an overwhelming number as that always leads to problems.

28. Always Do What is Best for You

Some guys have mastered the ability of subtly (or not so subtly) guilting their partners into staying with them. This is emotionally abusive and definitely not a healthy relationship. If all you can think about is finding a good reason to end things with a person, that in itself is good enough. Just tell them you’re not interested anymore.

29. Don’t Be Afraid To Share Your Feelings

Communication is obviously key in any relationship. Don’t even allow little things to build up, because that’s going to result in everything spilling out at once and you’ll both end up hurt. It is a good idea to casually bring up things that are bothering you, while they are bothering you so you can both try to compromise.

30. Learn to Be Happy By Yourself

Being able to be alone, without feeling lonely, is an incredible skill. Once you’ve mastered that, finding a fulfilling relationship will be a piece of cake.

#term project

0 notes

flauntpage · 7 years ago

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WWE is Whitewashing The Ultimate Warrior's Bigoted Past

When WWE brought back Jim Hellwig a.k.a The Ultimate Warrior after a long and often contentious absence from the company in order to induct him into the Hall of Fame in 2014, it was a heartwarming story of triumphant redemption that could only ever take place in the squared circle. The day after his induction, he delivered a now-legendary promo on Monday Night RAW where he seemingly foreshadowed his own death… and then a mere 24 hours later, he suffered a massive heart attack and was gone.

If it had been left at that, you could almost forgive WWE for leaving out the not-so-heartwarming part of the story — namely, a series of homophobic and racist remarks made in speeches on college campuses and since-deleted blog posts in the mid-late 2000's during Warrior's stint as a conservative commentator.

Only, it wasn't left at that.

In the following years, WWE proceeded to make Warrior a centerpiece of their burgeoning corporate philanthropy efforts, creating the Warrior Award, to be given out at an elaborate ceremony every year to a recipient who "exhibited unwavering strength and perseverance, and who lives life with the courage and compassion that embodies the indomitable spirit of the Ultimate Warrior." This year, the company merged its Warrior branding into its longstanding partnership with the Susan G. Komen Foundation with the #UnleashYourWarrior campaign. Various WWE Superstars and several breast cancer survivors have been sporting the likeness of the Warrior on television all month as part of the campaign and the company has been relentlessly promoting it on social media. Unleash Your Warrior.

Now is probably a good time to quickly go over a few of the things this man said during his stint as an aspiring conservative firebrand in the 2000s. All of these blog posts have been deleted, but through the magic of internet archiving, we were able to track them down.

On Hurricane Katrina victims:

Anyone who expresses sentiments like "How could they let this hurricane come here and do this to our lives?" is a kook as far as I am concerned. Those that somehow believe people are directly to blame for the happening of a natural catastrophe don't deserve to be heard. In fact, they should to be told to shut the hell up. These kinds of people contribute nothing toward repairing things to a better state. Truth is, these people thrive on despair and disarray. Chaos -- mentally and physically and in the way they conduct their lives -- is nothing new to them. They forge their whole lives in and around it. This hurricane to them was nothing more than like rearranging the furniture. If we could be shown what general conditions they lived in before the hurricane, we would see that had little respect for what they did have. We would see just how unorganized, unclean and dysfunctionally they lived. They never gave a care for order, cleanliness or function before, but now that they can get someone's attention who will possibly take over the responsibility of their life for them, they go on these tirades about how their life has been ruined. Their lives were already in ruin -- self ruin. Ruined by the bad choices they made over and over.

Beginning with the choice to sit on their ass expecting someone else to hand them a wonderful, beautiful, healthy and wealthy life. And excuse me for being the one to say so, but if you have a dozen kids and no husband to be a father, there are some 'holes' in your life plan that should be sewed up.

In case it isn't abundantly clear just who "these people" were, this article on the demographic makeup of Katrina victims should clear it up. Warrior is referring to "poor, mostly black New Orleanians without cars."

On the injustice of Martin Luther King Day:

Martin marched a few times from Selma, AL to Montgomery, AL. It's only about 40 miles and he walked along paved roads with security escorts and modern comforts and conveniences. He wrote a few jailhouse letters, plagiarized a great many speeches, and played up his last name "King" as if he was ONE. He led his best rally amid the monuments of Washington, DC. He preached proper, righteous behavior while he at the same time committed adultery many publicly verifiable times — oh, and he had "a dream." One to see a race of people freed completely from discriminate oppression.

On his speech on "Queer Studies" at a Conservative Alliance event at DePaul University:

One guy without his husband and two physically-repulsive butch-dykes slurping on one another's tongues (really) on the front row had a real hard time cozying up to my principled heterosexual obstinacy. So, in an act of pure selfish pleasure the guy got himself physically thrown out by the masculine security guard, unmistakably loving every single masochistic, man-handled moment of it. And the dykes, well, they ran out screaming and yelling like speared wild boars that I was a homophobe for making my remarks. Rumor has it that they decided to exit more because I was not getting stimulated by watching their poorly performed two-nightcrawlers-in-heat act. Ah, the incredible, selfless sacrifices the liberal loons will make on behalf of their cause...warms my heart and makes my whole body laugh.

On the death of actor Heath Ledger (who had played a homosexual character in the film Brokeback Mountain):

By today's standard, though, I do have to agree that he was a great father. Perhaps even greater then the father of the year, Hulk Hogan. After all, Leather Hedger did what it took to kill himself. His kid is without a father, yes, but the negative influence is now removed and his own child has the chance for a full recovery.

On famed WWE Announcer Bobby "The Brain" Heenan (who had recently been diagnosed with throat cancer at the time):

"As for you, Booby Heenan, it's just too difficult to keep a straight face talking about the pure two-faced bag of sh– you are (and have always been), what, with you also actually wearing one as a piece of body jewelry. You are dying, dis-eased on the inside, and no more time is left to get back any of the integrity that matters the most on death's bed. Imagine what it will be like, lying there taking in your last breaths, knowing you whored yourself out your whole life, and had to, in your final years, be faced with emptying your own personal sh–– bag affirming to you the true value of what you achieved in your life. Not even Vince could come up with a better finish than this. Karma is just a beautiful thing to behold."

This one is particularly relevant given that, by sheer coincidence, Heenan's recent death coincided with the launch of the #UnleashYourWarrior campaign. It's unclear whether the Susan G. Komen Foundation is aware of Warrior's past statements — they declined to comment on this story.

The purpose of bringing this up now isn't to drag a dead man's name through the mud, or to simply stir up controversy for no reason. It's to ask why WWE thinks it is appropriate to use this man's likeness as a pillar of their inspirational, altruistic corporate philanthropy branding. After his return to WWE, much was made of the bridges that Warrior had burned and the reparations he had made in the wrestling business, but neither Warrior or WWE offered any acknowledgment of—or apology for—his comments going beyond the wrestling business.

His widow, Dana Warrior, said in a statement to VICE Sports that Warrior had become a different man before he died.

"I will not be disloyal to my husband's memory or speak ill of a man who is not here to defend himself. I can, however, tell you his heart was changed by conversations with his two daughters. The true testament of the man behind the character is his ability to evolve. My husband did just that."

But there was no public sign that he had any change of stance.

It's also important to point out that these speeches weren't given by Jim Hellwig, they were quite literally given by Warrior—he legally changed his name during a copyright dispute with the company—so the idea that WWE can simply make a distinction between the Ultimate Warrior, a fictional character, and the actor portraying him doesn't really hold much water. Also worth mentioning: WWE banished Hulk Hogan, their biggest ever star, down the memory hole when his own ugly, racist comments were made public in 2015.

If the WWE Hall of Fame was occupied only by paragons of moral virtue, it would be a fairly lonely place. Donald Trump is in there, after all. And Warrior was unquestionably an iconic WWE character, who had a profound impact on the wrestling industry. One could make the case that, regardless of the horrible things he had said during this period (a period where he was not under contract with WWE and had no affiliation with the company) he still deserved to be recognized for his significant achievements inside the wrestling ring.

But the same company that banished Hogan has poured millions of dollars into a quasi-philanthropical marketing campaign promoting the image of a person who made vastly uglier comments.And make no mistake—these initiatives are marketing. This is a notion endorsed by Chief Brand Officer Stephanie McMahon in a tweet from WWE's Business Partner Summit in 2015 (the first year the Warrior Award was given out),

It's obviously not a bad thing that the WWE is making an effort to do community outreach, help with breast cancer awareness, and get involved in other philanthropic efforts. But their insistence on not only welcoming Warrior back into the fold, but completely whitewashing his past and elevating his likeness to a bland symbol of corporate altruism is shockingly tone-deaf, especially for a company that's at least outwardly trying to appear progressive, inclusive and diverse. When asked about this, WWE released the following statement to VICE Sports:

"WWE's 'Unleash Your Warrior' breast cancer awareness campaign and annual 'Warrior Award' recognize individuals that exhibit the strength and courage of WWE's legendary character The Ultimate Warrior. Any attempt to distract from the mission of these initiatives and take the spotlight away from the honorees is unfortunately misguided."

Either they were unaware of Warrior's past statements or they were aware and just thought they might sweep them under the rug like many of the other uglier parts of their corporate history. However it happened, the company has now spent years devoting significant resources to promoting a reactionary who is on record saying things that would make Rush Limbaugh blush, as a heroic figure of inspiration and redemption. It appears that they will continue to do so. This version of the Ultimate Warrior would be nice to believe in, but ultimately it's as fictional as any other wrestling storyline.

WWE is Whitewashing The Ultimate Warrior's Bigoted Past published first on http://ift.tt/2pLTmlv

0 notes

amtushinfosolutionspage · 7 years ago

Text

WWE is Whitewashing The Ultimate Warrior’s Bigoted Past

If it had been left at that, you could almost forgive WWE for leaving out the not-so-heartwarming part of the story — namely, a series of homophobic and racist remarks made in speeches on college campuses and since-deleted blog posts in the mid-late 2000’s during Warrior’s stint as a conservative commentator.

Only, it wasn’t left at that.

In the following years, WWE proceeded to make Warrior a centerpiece of their burgeoning corporate philanthropy efforts, creating the Warrior Award, to be given out at an elaborate ceremony every year to a recipient who “exhibited unwavering strength and perseverance, and who lives life with the courage and compassion that embodies the indomitable spirit of the Ultimate Warrior.” This year, the company merged its Warrior branding into its longstanding partnership with the Susan G. Komen Foundation with the #UnleashYourWarrior campaign. Various WWE Superstars and several breast cancer survivors have been sporting the likeness of the Warrior on television all month as part of the campaign and the company has been relentlessly promoting it on social media. Unleash Your Warrior.

On Hurricane Katrina victims:

Anyone who expresses sentiments like “How could they let this hurricane come here and do this to our lives?” is a kook as far as I am concerned. Those that somehow believe people are directly to blame for the happening of a natural catastrophe don’t deserve to be heard. In fact, they should to be told to shut the hell up. These kinds of people contribute nothing toward repairing things to a better state. Truth is, these people thrive on despair and disarray. Chaos — mentally and physically and in the way they conduct their lives — is nothing new to them. They forge their whole lives in and around it. This hurricane to them was nothing more than like rearranging the furniture. If we could be shown what general conditions they lived in before the hurricane, we would see that had little respect for what they did have. We would see just how unorganized, unclean and dysfunctionally they lived. They never gave a care for order, cleanliness or function before, but now that they can get someone’s attention who will possibly take over the responsibility of their life for them, they go on these tirades about how their life has been ruined. Their lives were already in ruin — self ruin. Ruined by the bad choices they made over and over.

In case it isn’t abundantly clear just who “these people” were, this article on the demographic makeup of Katrina victims should clear it up. Warrior is referring to “poor, mostly black New Orleanians without cars.”

On the injustice of Martin Luther King Day:

Martin marched a few times from Selma, AL to Montgomery, AL. It’s only about 40 miles and he walked along paved roads with security escorts and modern comforts and conveniences. He wrote a few jailhouse letters, plagiarized a great many speeches, and played up his last name “King” as if he was ONE. He led his best rally amid the monuments of Washington, DC. He preached proper, righteous behavior while he at the same time committed adultery many publicly verifiable times — oh, and he had “a dream.” One to see a race of people freed completely from discriminate oppression.

On his speech on “Queer Studies” at a Conservative Alliance event at DePaul University:

One guy without his husband and two physically-repulsive butch-dykes slurping on one another’s tongues (really) on the front row had a real hard time cozying up to my principled heterosexual obstinacy. So, in an act of pure selfish pleasure the guy got himself physically thrown out by the masculine security guard, unmistakably loving every single masochistic, man-handled moment of it. And the dykes, well, they ran out screaming and yelling like speared wild boars that I was a homophobe for making my remarks. Rumor has it that they decided to exit more because I was not getting stimulated by watching their poorly performed two-nightcrawlers-in-heat act. Ah, the incredible, selfless sacrifices the liberal loons will make on behalf of their cause…warms my heart and makes my whole body laugh.

On the death of actor Heath Ledger (who had played a homosexual character in the film Brokeback Mountain):

By today’s standard, though, I do have to agree that he was a great father. Perhaps even greater then the father of the year, Hulk Hogan. After all, Leather Hedger did what it took to kill himself. His kid is without a father, yes, but the negative influence is now removed and his own child has the chance for a full recovery.

On famed WWE Announcer Bobby “The Brain” Heenan (who had recently been diagnosed with throat cancer at the time):

“As for you, Booby Heenan, it’s just too difficult to keep a straight face talking about the pure two-faced bag of sh– you are (and have always been), what, with you also actually wearing one as a piece of body jewelry. You are dying, dis-eased on the inside, and no more time is left to get back any of the integrity that matters the most on death’s bed. Imagine what it will be like, lying there taking in your last breaths, knowing you whored yourself out your whole life, and had to, in your final years, be faced with emptying your own personal sh–– bag affirming to you the true value of what you achieved in your life. Not even Vince could come up with a better finish than this. Karma is just a beautiful thing to behold.”

This one is particularly relevant given that, by sheer coincidence, Heenan’s recent death coincided with the launch of the #UnleashYourWarrior campaign. It’s unclear whether the Susan G. Komen Foundation is aware of Warrior’s past statements — they declined to comment on this story.

The purpose of bringing this up now isn’t to drag a dead man’s name through the mud, or to simply stir up controversy for no reason. It’s to ask why WWE thinks it is appropriate to use this man’s likeness as a pillar of their inspirational, altruistic corporate philanthropy branding. After his return to WWE, much was made of the bridges that Warrior had burned and the reparations he had made in the wrestling business, but neither Warrior or WWE offered any acknowledgment of—or apology for—his comments going beyond the wrestling business.

His widow, Dana Warrior, said in a statement to VICE Sports that Warrior had become a different man before he died.

“I will not be disloyal to my husband’s memory or speak ill of a man who is not here to defend himself. I can, however, tell you his heart was changed by conversations with his two daughters. The true testament of the man behind the character is his ability to evolve. My husband did just that.”

But there was no public sign that he had any change of stance.

It’s also important to point out that these speeches weren’t given by Jim Hellwig, they were quite literally given by Warrior—he legally changed his name during a copyright dispute with the company—so the idea that WWE can simply make a distinction between the Ultimate Warrior, a fictional character, and the actor portraying him doesn’t really hold much water. Also worth mentioning: WWE banished Hulk Hogan, their biggest ever star, down the memory hole when his own ugly, racist comments were made public in 2015.

But the same company that banished Hogan has poured millions of dollars into a quasi-philanthropical marketing campaign promoting the image of a person who made vastly uglier comments.And make no mistake—these initiatives are marketing. This is a notion endorsed by Chief Brand Officer Stephanie McMahon in a tweet from WWE’s Business Partner Summit in 2015 (the first year the Warrior Award was given out),

It’s obviously not a bad thing that the WWE is making an effort to do community outreach, help with breast cancer awareness, and get involved in other philanthropic efforts. But their insistence on not only welcoming Warrior back into the fold, but completely whitewashing his past and elevating his likeness to a bland symbol of corporate altruism is shockingly tone-deaf, especially for a company that’s at least outwardly trying to appear progressive, inclusive and diverse. When asked about this, WWE released the following statement to VICE Sports:

“WWE’s ‘Unleash Your Warrior’ breast cancer awareness campaign and annual ‘Warrior Award’ recognize individuals that exhibit the strength and courage of WWE’s legendary character The Ultimate Warrior. Any attempt to distract from the mission of these initiatives and take the spotlight away from the honorees is unfortunately misguided.”

Either they were unaware of Warrior’s past statements or they were aware and just thought they might sweep them under the rug like many of the other uglier parts of their corporate history. However it happened, the company has now spent years devoting significant resources to promoting a reactionary who is on record saying things that would make Rush Limbaugh blush, as a heroic figure of inspiration and redemption. It appears that they will continue to do so. This version of the Ultimate Warrior would be nice to believe in, but ultimately it’s as fictional as any other wrestling storyline.

WWE is Whitewashing The Ultimate Warrior’s Bigoted Past syndicated from http://ift.tt/2ug2Ns6

0 notes

flauntpage · 7 years ago

Text

WWE is Whitewashing The Ultimate Warrior's Bigoted Past

Only, it wasn't left at that.

On Hurricane Katrina victims:

On the injustice of Martin Luther King Day:

On his speech on "Queer Studies" at a Conservative Alliance event at DePaul University:

On the death of actor Heath Ledger (who had played a homosexual character in the film Brokeback Mountain):

On famed WWE Announcer Bobby "The Brain" Heenan (who had recently been diagnosed with throat cancer at the time):

His widow, Dana Warrior, said in a statement to VICE Sports that Warrior had become a different man before he died.

But there was no public sign that he had any change of stance.

WWE is Whitewashing The Ultimate Warrior's Bigoted Past published first on http://ift.tt/2pLTmlv

0 notes

flauntpage · 7 years ago

Text

WWE is Whitewashing The Ultimate Warrior's Bigoted Past

Only, it wasn't left at that.

On Hurricane Katrina victims:

On the injustice of Martin Luther King Day:

On his speech on "Queer Studies" at a Conservative Alliance event at DePaul University:

On the death of actor Heath Ledger (who had played a homosexual character in the film Brokeback Mountain):

On famed WWE Announcer Bobby "The Brain" Heenan (who had recently been diagnosed with throat cancer at the time):

His widow, Dana Warrior, said in a statement to VICE Sports that Warrior had become a different man before he died.

But there was no public sign that he had any change of stance.

WWE is Whitewashing The Ultimate Warrior's Bigoted Past published first on http://ift.tt/2pLTmlv

0 notes

flauntpage · 7 years ago

Text

WWE is Whitewashing The Ultimate Warrior's Bigoted Past

Only, it wasn't left at that.

On Hurricane Katrina victims:

On the injustice of Martin Luther King Day:

On his speech on "Queer Studies" at a Conservative Alliance event at DePaul University:

On the death of actor Heath Ledger (who had played a homosexual character in the film Brokeback Mountain):

On famed WWE Announcer Bobby "The Brain" Heenan (who had recently been diagnosed with throat cancer at the time):

His widow, Dana Warrior, said in a statement to VICE Sports that Warrior had become a different man before he died.

But there was no public sign that he had any change of stance.

WWE is Whitewashing The Ultimate Warrior's Bigoted Past published first on http://ift.tt/2pLTmlv

0 notes