#yes im just mad that ive seen 2 posts now that i really wanted to engage with and now no longer can

[ghosthostwiththemost]

Letting people make things unrebloggable was the worst thing this website did

[sailoryooons]

Yo im so tired of people on here coming into writers inboxes and complaining about shit. THIS IS FUCKING FREE!!!! Were fucking lucky that they are responding to ANY messages about their work let alone fucking unconstructive and rude complaints. Because they literally don’t have to do any of this at all. NOTHING! They can post one chapter of a series and hype it up and then never post anything else about it again. They can write for one fandom for years, then switch on a dime and never write anything else for it again. They can say again and again that a fic is almost done then never release it. They don’t owe us shit. It’s a privilege to be able to read the drabbles, scenarios, and fucking novel and series-length stories with the themes, characters, and world-building that we love so much. And then to be complaining about some editing???? I’ve begun stories that I’ve been excited about the premise, and the grammar has been to the point that it’s completely pulled me out and I couldn’t finish it even though I loved where the story was going. I’ve only been reading works on this blog for like a month now, so I don’t know about old stuff. The last one i read I read (the jin gamer/roommate fic i think?) there were like maybe 2 or 3 times where i had to go back and reread and piece together what the intention was or where there seemed to be a missing word, but that’s so rare and like, didn’t pull me out of the story that much. And it’s fucking free! If i paid for a book, then i might be disappointed, but if i paid for a book, there probably would have had a whole publishing team that would have edited that out in the first place!!! Go read things you know are edited if you dont like it and don’t bother people who are providing free things that don’t hurt anyone because of dumb ass reasons.

I 100% get if you don’t post this if you don’t want all this yelling and negativity, but I hope you know that you are appreciated for what you give so freely. This is just one of many comments ive seen lately come to writers on here and while some of them have seemed to come from well-intentioned people, there’s like a sense if entitlement that’s completely unearned behind it that makes me fume! I try to stay out of other people’s business but this made me so mad!!!

Hi wow okay first of all - thank you for overall just getting it. Writing is a really hard thing to do and there are a lot of content creators on this website who are churning out content and trying to do their best to make it good enough for those who engage with them.

I agree with a lot of points on this - when we start to consider reader/writer relationships, a lot of people don't realize that there really isn't an obligation on the writer to do things the way that they're expected, whether it's updating at a certain frequency or editing a certain way or just... anything. While most of the CCs I know (including myself) rely really heavy on audience feedback for the way that we do things, there are certain perceptions, comments or expectations that are just super tiring.

While I totally understand how my minimal editing can seem lazy or like I don't care - that's certainly not it. It's just really the lesser of two evils for me - either I can use editing programs if I don't have someone to beta immediately, or I can delay posting for a few days while I get my bearings and edit.

Most of my writer friends will tell you that editing your own stuff is hard for some people. For some writers it's super easy to pump out a huge fic and turn around and edit. For others, it's not. It's really about what works best for each person, and this is currently what works best for me (I get really nervous delaying fics over and over again because I don't give myself enough grace and time to finish).

But overall - yes, agreed with a ton of things you said in this and I'm responding publically because I think there are a lot of really great points about the writer/reader relationship and expectations.

Editing more is something I definitely want to work on and I'll be better at asking for betas (I always feel very intimidated to do this) but yeah. Thank you!!

[spnshameblog]

unpopular or actually possibly controversial opinion re cockles - i think the information that a group of people had seen proof of jensen and misha living together should have stayed within their private chat. and especially that they specifically saw utility bills with both their names. at this point what is the difference between posting the photo of that proof you have and just talking about it? like so many people would have assumed either way that they lived together when misha shared that photo and message, without anyone else implicitly confirming it, but this way, even without a photo being shared, we do have information that was clearly not intended to be shared.

imo a massive difference between assuming from their public interactions (cons, other events, social media) that they're together versus sharing things like how people saw them together somewhere or whatever else someone saw in vancouver or something else they have as proof. im not gonna deny that im nosy and curious and i do like knowing these things, but ultimately i believe it crosses a line.

Yes, i agree that you should never publicise information that wasnt given willingly and i think that people kinda stretched misha's comment about staying in jensen's spare room? a lot of them justified their breaking of silence by saying that misha himself confirmed they had lived together which imho he didnt really? i'm not too mad at them for this, once the floodgate was open there really was no stopping this and i do credit them for keeping a lid on it for that long, but its a leap from having confirmed "misha stayed at jensens place sometimes" to admitting to having known they lived together for years.

i think it would have been worse if they actually shared the documents. yes, they shouldnt have talked about them at all, but by not showing proof there is still plausible deniability, which is fucking crucial. ive said this a lot, but people lie on the internet and by not sharing hard evidence we can still comfortably throw a shroud of secrecy over this. we have to maintain this so please dont go "well now that this info is out i might as well share the papers".

oh and i feel you about the being nosy part. i am a gigantic gossip and i LOVE reading about secret information, but the short rush of euphoria just isnt worth it to me, either. actors have a parasocial relationship with their fanbase, too, and this kind of stuff is a breach of trust. i would feel so unsafe if i knew ppl had seen my private documents and had talked about them online. i respect all the people who decided against sharing anything and i believe that most of them only started talking about this bc a few of them had already jumped the gun and mentioned the proof they had.

i get that people want to back up their theories and are tired of getting called delusional tinhatters ESPECIALLY by j///2 stannies, but its not worth it guys. especially if it leads to ppl actually confronting both of them with our theories.

as far as i'm concerned i will choose to treat the existence of any potential hard evidence as a rumour until we get actual confirmation from either of the guys, but tbh im not holding my breath about that.

[newtedison]

my thoughts on the crank palace

i touched about this a bit on twitter (@newtedison_) but i figured i would Try and touch on my points more here (spoilers obv) again, its sort of lengthy

1. im gonna start with talking about the ending because i need to get it out of the way. either i havent read the books in a while and i forgot some canon (which could very well be true, i literally forgot that Bliss was a thing) or this ending makes no sense and is (somehow) setting up for a tdc sequel? so first off, newt was shot in the Head with a Bullet and somehow didnt immediately die? i know that that can happen in real life but it just seems so unlikely that not only would he not die, but he would survive long enough for someone from WCKD to transport him back to their labs and try to revive him. and who the fuck was he talking to? did thomas get newt’s journal at some point and i just dont remember? like i said, either im forgetting stuff or this ending doesnt make sense and is setting up a sequel which...i’ll get to later

2. why was this written? like, what was the point? i understand that this wasnt going to be all sunshine and rainbows but i feel like i was reading torture porn. like, literally all that happens is newt gets tortured (which is described in detail) by WCKD soldiers, has bouts of insane-fueled rage where he KILLS MULTIPLE PEOPLE, and then he dies. ??? what did this contribute to the canon? what was this trying to accomplish? truthfully, i never really wanted a newt-POV...well, anything except for maybe those little nuggets he wrote some time ago. but even if i HAD wanted a newt-POV novella, this is not what i would have wanted. he KNOWS that newt is almost universally the most loved character in this franchise. you can tell because he constantly uses him as a way to get fans in his good graces again. so why on earth would he take that character that so many people love and write a novella where its torture porn and a descent into madness before death? i am not interested in that At All. i’ve read fics (and even written a drabble) where newt is a Crank, and those were more respectful and easier to read than tcp. the parts where newt is having bouts of the Flare were literally exhausting to read; it was described in such vivid and torturous detail that it made me sick reading it. and it didnt help that newt is a character i care a lot about. i didn’t need to know what becoming a Crank felt like. the way it was described in the other books (and even the movies) told me everything i needed to know. the way thomas and everyone found newt at the crank palace in tdc and hes described as obviously not well, but not knowing what exactly happened to him...thats good enough on its own. the mystery of what exactly newt had to endure is part of what gives his journey more emotional depth. not everything needs to be written out and explained. not every gap needs to be filled in. 

3. me saying “the characterization felt off” is going to make some people roll their eyes because ‘duh, sami, the characterization will be off because he’s going insane’ to which i say...exactly. we weren’t really reading a newt-POV novella, were we? even if he isn’t past the Gone in the beginning, hes clearly not the same person we knew him as. the whole novella felt like an uncanny valley situation; i knew i was supposed to be reading about newt, but it felt like i was reading about someone else who looked like him. and that is part of what made this such a disconnect and made me lose interest at parts. not only that, but the world building and lore is inconsistent. newt makes a comment about how it used to rain in the glade, and apparently (as ive been told) that is simply not true. keisha having somehow working cell phone that magically connects her to her family also doesnt make sense. how would they have each others’ numbers? what are the odds that they BOTH found working cell phones in an apocalypse? i get that its a novella but you cant just throw something that crazy in there as a plot convenience. actually work on your plot and world building in a cohesive way, please. and another thing that doesnt make sense...

4. ...is newt finding out that sonya is his sister. if there was anything i would have wanted from a newt-pov novella, it would have been this. him finding out that not only is sonya his sister, but he already knows her post-WCKD. something that would have made this novella actually captivating, contributing something worthwhile to the canon that i would actually want to read, is if newt found out while in the crank palace that sonya was his sister; the Flare would remove that part of the Slice in his brain, and he would realize it was her. then, knowing that he couldnt go past the Gone before seeing her, he would try to find a way to get back to her. he could learn this after thomas and everyone originally see him, so it could match up with the canon. and then, by the time 250 comes along, hes lost all hope of that actually happening, and lashes out to thomas in a fit of rage. the journey of him trying to find his ACTUAL sister would have meant more to me than the story of keisha and dante. trust me, i love a found family trope as much as the next girl. but this series is FULL of the found family trope. it pretty much is the backbone of the franchise. so to see a blood family dynamic would have been a refreshing change of pace that i actually would have been interested in reading. also, the way that newt DOES find out about sonya is...underwhelming. he just randomly says “you remind me of my sister, sonya” to keisha in the WCKD truck. first of all, sonya is not the name you would actually know her by. you would know her by her birth name (which is lizzy? elizabeth?). second, why does he act like he didnt already meet her in the series? when the WCKD doctor tells him sonya is his sister and is alive, hes so surprised. wouldn’t he have known that already? why is there not more emphasis on the fact he already met her? that would have been a really interesting dynamic to explore, and im sad they didnt

5. the pacing and dialogue of tcp is so dragged out. i remember specifically there was a section where newt goes to talk to keisha after she starts abandoning dante, and i swear to god there was a page and a half of text before anything ACTUALLY happened or anyone ACTUALLY said anything. dashner described a launcher at one point as “the energy dependent electric firing projectile device.” that’s SIX words to describe a stun gun. a fucking stun gun! we know what it is! why did you have to use six words??? it just felt like everything was dragged and stretched to the longest it could possibly be and it added to the exhaustion i felt while reading it

6. okay i cant end it without talking about newtmas. its very obvious by now that newtmas is a VERY large part of this fanbase. its clearly the most popular ship and what keeps a lot of people interested in this series. even the marketing team for the MOVIES used newtmas as a advertising tactic (i.e.; using thomas and newt standing face to face as a thumbnail for the trailer, emphasizing newtmas based questions in interviews, even making a fucking facebook memories video for them. yes that last one is real). not only does dashner use newt as a way to lure fans in; he also uses newtmas. the parts that were sprinkled into this were so obvious that it didnt feel authentic. i cant speak for the original trilogy; i dont know the culture around ships back then, and i dont know how much it influenced his writing at the time. but the scenes in those books felt more genuine than tcp. by genuine i mean; he wrote scenes without a relationship in mind, but the chemistry had noticeable subtext that, while unintentional, was largely agreed upon by the larger audience. the parts of newtmas he added into tcp felt artificial and forced, likely as a way for people to take snippets of and use as a free marketing tool for him. one example you might have already seen; “he had already gotten used to his post-thomas, post-WCKD life.” the fact that dashner SPECIFICALLY used the phrase “post-thomas” rather than “post-his friends” or something similar shows that he is using newtmas as a hook on purpose. not only that, but to make newt’s last thoughts as he died “tommy. tommy will understand...” is...wow. first of all, i never wanted to know what newt’s dying thoughts were, but thanks, i guess? and second, when we all initially thought newt died underneath thomas with a gun to his head, i was pretty much inferred that newts last thoughts would probably be about thomas; they would sort of have to be, given the circumstances. so adding that in gives me the same feeling that “i’m coming for you, newt” at the end of the fever code gave me. not as offensive, but written very much on purpose. and the ending is implying that there will somehow be a sequel where thomas gets newt’s journal from...someone. at this point, i can only think that this sequel will retroactively make newtmas canon somehow. now that newt has been confirmed as gay, it could happen. which brings me to my last point...

7. hearing dashner confirm newt is gay was already mind-boggling before. now that i’ve read the crank palace...im angry. im very angry. i think its safe to say that newt is the character that suffers the most in this series. you can argue with me but hes definitely high on the list, if not #1. so; you take this character. you give him a horribly sad arc in the original trilogy, then decide to expand upon it and tell us, your largely QUEER fanbase, exactly how painful and torturous his last days were, in detail. and then you tell us he’s gay. something that is never mentioned in the canon, only in an offhanded reply to a tweet of someone calling you out. on a base level, i can understand why people would be happy. representation (i guess), seeing themselves in the character, having their headcanons be confirmed. great. but what i see is you telling your largely queer fanbase “hey, you see the only confirmed gay character? im going to literally write torture porn about him before killing him off and offer it to you like im providing a service to your community.” how fucked up is that? “hey, kids, if youre gay, you WILL be violently tortured and become violent and a danger to the ones you love. then you will die and your love will never be reciprocated.” what a message! and if he DOES end up retroactively making newtmas “canon” in some weird sequel...i will start foaming at the mouth. THIS is an example of how not all queer representation is good or genuine.

i’ve definitely forgotten some points but this is long enough already. let me know if you agree or if theres anything else you want to add! im interested in what you guys think

(8. I JUST REMEMBERED!!! if WCKD needed to study newt so bad bc sonya is his sister and is immune while he isnt, why did they let him run around the crank palace in the first place??? you cant test his vitals or anything you’re literally just watching him. what is the point????)

[spookyboogie3]

The trope Last Minute Hookup shouldn’t be used for LGBTQ+ relationships.

AND DEFENDING MY LAST POST ABOUT THIS.

I DO NOT hate any of these pairings. A good many of them could have been handled differently by the creators, writers, and networks. But this isnt me hating the relationships or characters or shows. Just going off about how they shouldnt have been tacked on at the end of their respective series. 

As of writing this all of these shows have ended their original runs. Except for Supernatural which is on its last few episodes. And Supergirl, which announced its coming to end with season 6.

LGBTQ characters and relationships aren’t as common in the media as straight-cis characters and relationships. Sure things are improving but a lot of networks and writers still don’t fully understand why representation is important why they can’t keep using the same throwaway tropes they’ve been using for the straight-cis relationships.

You could name any piece of media and find and name one character that isn’t LGBTQ+, but you can’t do this with LGBTQ+ characters. We haven’t gotten to the point where they are as common as non-LGBTQ characters.

I have a whole paper I wrote on why asexual representation is important to have in the media and the same logic applies to any part of the LGBTQ+ or anything that falls under minority.

Back to the topic on hand. The trope of “Last Minute Hookup.”

Its exactly what it sounds like. Characters get to together at the very end of the story. These characters could have a on and off again relationship, lots of ship teasing, the classic “Will They or Wont They?” trope. What makes it different for non-LGBT characters in relationships to do this, we know what these relationships look like. Not to say the that both Non and LGBT relationship cant have similar struggles, however members of the LGBTQ+ community know how hard it is to feel like your identity and self matters and is normal.

I know that the whole “will they, wont they” thing is done for drama and networks and showrunners think if they give the fans what they want that they’ll start losing viewers and they have nothing to look forward to. Which is true to some degree. But most of this comes from the writers not knowing how to fucking write relationships.

Let’s just focus on whats it like to be in a non-straight relationship.

Heres an example: you have an action series, with 2 male leads and halfway through the show, they get together. Cool. Now you have a Battle Couple.

By making LGBTQ relationships happen at the end of a series that’s already had plenty of other non-LGBTQ relationships happen before it, it makes it look like the people in charge don’t care for it or were afraid of backlash. But it’s the end of the series so its not like they can get the show cancelled or anything. (The only people who are going to lash out at LGBT couple or characters are homophobic people, we don’t want them around any way so just make stuff super gay, so they’ll leave)

This is especially a problem when the writer and network have spent the whole series queerbaiting the audience with these characters.

 Side note for anyone is doesn’t actually know what queerbaiting is:

It’s a marketing technique used in entertainment, which the writer or creators hint at but then don’t actually depict sex-same romance or LGBTQ representation. They do this to attract (bait) the LGBT/queer or straight ally audience into the show with the suggestion of representation but at the same time avoiding this as not alienate other audience members *cough* (homophobes) *cough*

Definition is from Wikipedia, not a reliable source says my highschool teachers and college professors but fuck em

The Legend of Korra is a great example of Last-Minute Hookup. Korra and Asami had VERY little ship teasing, and that was in the last 2 books/seasons. Any thing that was perceived as romantic came from the fans wearing shipping goggles. So to a lot of people just casually watching, yes this looked like it came out of nowhere. Nickelodeon had some serious balls to say how brave they were for putting 2 girls into a romantic relationship.

Theres a few problems with this.

A. It never actually aired on TV (to my knowledge). The last 2 seasons of Korra were put on Nicks website.

B. The confirmation that this Korrasami was canon had to come from the creators on twitter because of how unclear it was.

C. The show did the bare minimum when it came to hooking them up in the series. They walk off holding hands (very cute btw). They didn’t even get a kiss. Aang and Katara had a Last Minute Hookup at the end of ATLA after 3 seasons of ship tease and THEY GOT A KISS. Hell the original end of LoK*, has Korra and Mako kissing. *(the first season, they didn’t know they were getting more seasons at the time, no matter what you hear the writers say, they’re full of shit)

D. Anything continuation of Korra has come in the form of comics, which her and Asami are in a fairly well written relationship. Yes, they do kiss. Yes it would’ve been great to see this stuff happen in series.

A show that handles this a little bit better is Adventure Time. Not by much though. It implied several times that Princess Bubblegum and Marceline have history together and its shown more and more in its last few seasons that there is some ship tease happening. However its not until the finale where they kiss, and they are shown in the last minute of the show cuddling together in Marcy’s house. HBO has picked up Adventure Time and has a miniseries called Adventure Time: Distant Lands, where Bubblegum and Marceline’s past relationship is shown.  

I had brought up in my original post about being upset with networks making LGBTQ+ relationships canon in the last season/episode. I originally had Catradora tagged. While Catra and Adora have history together, they did not become official couple until the end of the series.

Yes, I was wrong about the network making things canon in the last episode as they’ve always had ship tease with each other, and it probably was the writers’ intent to put them together by the end. They do technically fall under the Last-Minute Hookup, however.

I wanna talk about Once Upon a Time really quick. Fans of the show were hoping and wishing for an LGBTQ couple for the show as a lot of characters, especially Regina and Emma, have alot Ho Yay moments. The showrunners weren’t going to put those two together, for whatever reasons they may have for that (im indifferent on all the shipping going on with this show). The showrunners thought to put two characters together, and hoo boy did it not make people happy. The characters they put together are Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz and Ruby the red riding hood, which would be fine if they had properly been developed.

The entire episode they did this in was a mess. They stopped the current arc during the season 5 episode ‘Ruby Slippers,’ to go over the characters that haven’t been seen in years, Dorothy was introduced and last seen in season 3, and Ruby was introduced in season 1 and was last seen in season 5 before ‘Ruby Slippers’. The characters get together in the same episode the meet in and are never seen again. The characters barely interacted, barely got along, and showed little to no ship tease or interest in each other and BOOM they are in love and together aaaaaannnnndd they’re gone. Other than having One Million Moms, a Christian fundamentalist organization, protest against the show and want it taken off the air (yes this really happened). The fans weren’t please with this development of the characters either.  

(also Mulan was right there and already knew Ruby from a previous episode, and Mulan already is established to like girls as shown by her being in love with Aurora. Don’t know why the writers didn’t just put these 2 together but whatever I guess)

So they tried again in season 7 with MadArcher. The characters of Alice, a version of Alice in Wonderland from another realm (its complicated) and Robin, the daughter of Robin Hood and the Wicked Witch (it’s also complicated). And the writers did a lot better here. Both characters were allowed to have time together and have a history together too and it was done over the whole season. Not just one episode.

Now even though the writers decided to do something different with the last season and it could be detached from the previous 6 seasons, MadArcher is not really a Last Minute Hookup per say but still falls under my thing about it being the last season so who gives a fuck if One Million Moms gets mad us and tries to get us cancelled again.

 I would like to say I have never watched a single episode of Supernatural in my life. I may one day. But as of right now my knowledge of it is coming primary from what ive seen on tumblr. You know a great source for doing research and looking for reliable information among the piles of shitposting.

From what I know from fans, the writers of Supernatural have been queer baiting for years. I mean it’s the CW, I’m not that surprised. What also wouldn’t surprise me, that by the end of the series Castiel is back and he and Dean actually start and relationship or strongly hint at starting one. I actually fear for the writer lives if they threw out a confession scene after years of queerbaiting and potential ship tease (debatable) and they don’t put them together. Fans are going to be angrier than they probably ever have been with this show and the showrunners and writers really would be known for queer baiting.

From what I know about how previous shows have done and if anyone that has ever worked on this show wants to continue living, Castiel will be back from Super Hell (is that what yall are calling it?) and he will get together with Dean. And they will fall under the Last-Minute Hookup trope and my networks make LGBTQ relationships canon last season.

 One last show I want to talk about is Supergirl, which in has been recently announced that the 6th season will be the last. The show started on CBS but moved to the CW after the end of season 1. So more CW bullshit. There is no confirmation about whether the CW or any of the Supergirl writers are planning to do this, its all speculation. Supergirl is more LGBTQ friendly than some other shows on the Network. One of the main characters came out a few years ago and had a girlfriend a season and has had plenty of hookups with other ladies around the Arrowverse. They even introduced a trans-woman superhero in the form of Dreamer.

Let’s talk SuperCorp. Lena Luthor was introduced in the 2nd season and has been a major character in Kara’s life ever since her introduction. Even if she isn’t involved in the plot, Kara always goes to her to talk and check in on her and worry about her. They are best friends. Since the 2 have met, there has been plenty of Les Yay going on. The writers seem to be aware of the fans wanting SuperCorp to be canon and they keep throwing in moments like Kara and Lena struggling together or Kara carrying Lena bridal style.

Why I bring this up after the announcement of Supergirl’s final season to start next year. We may get SuperCorp. Kara has a relationship with William in the show and not a single person likes this relationship. The writers may scrap it and get put Kara and Lena together for the final season. This is a big maybe though. The Supergirl writers and crew get called out a lot for queerbaiting.

   Let me know if you guys have any other examples of last season/last episode LGBTQ+ hookup.

And please let me know if you see any mistakes. This was all done in one sitting so I may have some things wrong.

Also check out the video by @aretheygayvideos on this topic too.

[imagine-something-fun]

here goes nothing ig...

So idk whos going to read this and my English is fucked so if youre gonna read this goodluck. BuT!!

Hi, how are you? ig that we havent seen eachother in a while and since then alot has changed. Now that i think about it i rlly wouldnt know what exactly, ive been so inactive on here that it seems like 4 years ago since i last posted. The reason i am posting this today is because i saw old chats on here and i read them and i got so miserable. Im not that person i was when i used this media platform and i shall never be again, and that scares the living hell out of me.

I saw all those chats eventually die off and the thing was, i dont think i even noticed, maybe not even cared. i was rlly weird but in that way also rlly strong. Maybe its just the one too many stabbies in the back or the 1 time too many that i felt excluded but idk if im still that strong.

Yes, I was a bitch. Do i regret it? to a certain level. but i now understand why i was the way i was and sometimes i still wanna be like that.

All i ever wanted was love and acceptance, once i didnt even feel happy in my own skin anymore i started to freak out. Lash out inside is fine with me, destroy your liver who cares? You can do with a few braincells less. Well i could until i couldnt. and then i got mad at everyone around me.

Im not going to say that i shouldnt have gotten so mad, but i will say that i shouldnt have gotten so sad. It wasnt necessarily directed to you but it did hurt so much and everything became too much and then i had enough.

Enough of everyone who judged me and enough of the people i called friends. But to them i will say, even tho you will never read this and maybe its better that way, im sorry i cared so much and im sorry it wasnt meant to be, but the only one i should say sorry to well that person, she is me. (hihi i rhyme)

Yk, the only thing i ever asked for was acceptance and thats the one thing i never got. ive been my share of bitchy and mean and stupid and dumb tho, i wouldnt have wanted to hang out with me either, atleast something we agreed on. But hating myself and hearing it from the only person you wanted understanding from, well that sUcks. But now i think abt it im even a little bit thankful.

Yes you were all so harsh in your own way and i tried so hard to fit in, but i tried too much and if everything wouldnt have gone the way it went, and if i never dug myself so deep i never wouldve gotten myself out of there. Out of the brainkillers, moodswings but most importantly, out of that band.

It was the one thing i loved most, and the only thing that killed me inside. Im going to admit i am insecure, not abt my body or face or hair or any of that. Im insecure about belonging. Do i fit in? and i didnt and i told myself i did. In just a few months i started hating what i loved most.

And if i hadnt been so down i wouldnt have ever seen how much i actually love him. And if i hadnt seen that and never figured i can live my life the way i want to, i wouldve never quit that band and wouldve stayed with those people alot longer.

if the odds are against me and you actually do read this on my very open social media page i dont blame you, maybe just get really embarrassed. but ill just let you know i never replaced you, once i realised i couldnt live my life with you in it, i never wanted to know anyone that even resembled you. and that thought gave me more peace of mind then any of the past 2 years ever gave me.

yes this is a very big rant about how i struggle with change and yes i know ill cringe about it in a few weeks months years whatever, but i do this for me, read it or dont. but if you did and youre reading this right now, whoever you are, i wanna ask you.

Are you happy?

because i wasnt, even when i thought i was, and maybe i just wanna give you my word of advice but dont go looking for something youll never find. itll save you alot of time and energy and trust me, youll need it.

so i think i finished up here. thank you for reading this although you really didnt have to.

Goodnight,

Jackie

[shereadsandwritesformelanin]

The Baker And Her Actor: part IV [Click, Click, and Post!]

Parings: Chris Evans x Black Fem!Reader

Summary: You meet Chris while making a house delivery for the Evans. He can’t get you off of his mind, and to be honest neither can you.

Warnings: profanity, sexual content, angst, but overall fluff!

Notes: I hope you guys enjoy! If you have any request feel free to share those. Leave comments in the notes section!

Previous parts: (1) (2) (3) (3 cont.)

-

Y/n’s Point Of View:

Body aching, you shift once more before waking up.

You let out a loud groan of fustration. You’d beeen tossing and turning all night.

You were sad and felt like an idiot for what you did to Chris. Running off like Cinderella with no explinatiom was just so pathetic, especially after the perfect night you to had.

You knew you wanted to take things slow and you should have just conveyed that instead of running off no questions asked.

You needed to make things right.

Rolling over reaching into your night stan you grab your phone yanking out the charger.

Two missed calls from Kiara.

One text message from deac.

Three twitter notifications.

Nothing from Chris.

Sighing, you make your way over to the messages app. Opening up the messages between you and Chris.

Reluctantly you begin typing worried to wake him or if he’d be too upset and just leave you on read, and well who could you really blame if he did.

Y/n: Hi.

It had been fifteen minutes since you sent that lackluster texts message.

He’d probably seen it and thrown it and you away for some other hot Hollywood chick he had stored in his phone.

How was it possible to even screw that up.

Well great job Y/n another one bites the dust.

-

Chris’s Point Of View:

I’d be lying if i say I hadn’t seen your message. I wasn’t busy, I wasn’t doing anything at all.

I was just confused. You had me confused, confused enough to sit on my sofa coffee in hand watching my phone hoping you’d text again or even call.

I shouldn’t be a dick. I’m sure you had your reasons for pulling away, maybe it was too fast or you weren’t really into me.

Were you using me?

No I can’t think that, you’d never. You didn’t seem like the type. If you were you’d done it already and wash your hands with me by now.

Just fucking text her back, meatball.

Chris: Hi.

-

Y/n’s Point Of View:

Your phone pinged from across the room. Hearing the alert almost made you jump across the terrain of your bedroom.

Notification from The Captain.

Your heart nearly stopped. He finally responded like you hoped he would.

The Captain: Hi.

Shit he seems upset.

Call him.

Setting aside your nerves and pride you dial his number hoping he’d pick up so you wouldn’t make a fool of yourself once more.

Pick up.

Pick up.

C’mon pick up

Just pick up th-.

“Hello.” His raspy voice answers.

Oh

“Hello- erm good morning.” You state attempting to should chipper.

“Good morning y/n.” Chris repeats.

Just cut to the chase.

“So..about last night.’ You mutter. “I just want you to know it’s not you I promise I’m just stupid and shouldn’t have pulled away you were nothing but great I just. I’m not sure why I did that.”

Lying obviously.

“Y/n. You don’t have to explain anything to me, I’m not upset. I’d be lying if I say I wasn’t shocked and confused. But I’m not upset or blaming you.” Chris reassures.

Even through the phone he managed to convey his bubbling emotions.

“Can I see you today.” You ask nerves bubbling in your chest.

“What do you have in mind?”

-

You arrive at Chris’s house after an slight delay at the security gate. You couldn’t believe they thought you were there to “violate the tenants homes.”

Y/n: I’m outside.

The Captain: Im coming.

Finally you see Chris, jogging out of his home making sure to lock the door on his way out.

You unlock the door allowing him to jump into the passenger seat.

“Hey, sorry I was late dodger was being a tad bit fussy.” Chris apologizes.

“No, I’m sorry you have to be in my half ass car.” You joke

“No it’s great. Seriously!’ Chris reassures. “You got leather seats and Evan a sun roof.”

“Chris its a thirteen year old car, I’m suprised she’s still going.”

“Speaking of going. Where are we going?” Chris quips

“You’ll see.” You smirk

-

“A farmers market?” Chris questions stepping out of the car.

“Yes this is where I get my produce I don’t want any of the pesticides in grocery store produce.” You explain grabing your reusable grocery bags from the back seat.

“I hadn’t even thought about that before.’ Chris admits. “Let me get that for you.” Taking the bags from you slinging them over his shoulder.

You notice him slipping on some sun glasses. It wasn’t sunny at all, it was actually quite dull out.

“What’s with the glasses MIB?” You tease.

“Just not in the mood to be recognized, thats all.”

Sometimes when you were with Chris it slipped your mind that he was a wildly famous A-list celebrity. So you could understand the need for privacy and not wanting to be noticed all the time.

“Mm.’ You say. “Oh I always wanna get these Dutch donuts for my team. They’ve been working so hard I think they deserve something.”

“That’s sweet of you. I can help you bring them.” Chris offers

“If you want, but warning kiaras there and she’ll be a little bit over the top.” You warn

“Yeah I figured that when she pretended to not know I was in the house on our date.” Chris admits chuckling lightly.

You let a small smile paint your face thinking back to your date. “So about our date, I really wanna be honest and transparent here.” You say picking threw a pile of apples.

Chris faces you giving his undivided attention. It was clear to him there was something you wanted to get off your chest since you continued to peruse the conversation.

“It’s just, I haven’t talked to a guy, been with a guy, touched a guy in five years since my last serious relationship and I freaked out.” You admit sheepishly.

You couldn’t look at him you were too embarrassed.

You felt Chris slip his hand onto your free one rubbing across its skin comforting.

“Y/n like I said before you don’t have to explain it to me. I’m not upset, but I’m glad you feel comfortable enough to tell me this. I want what you want. We can take this as slow as you’d like.” Chris clarifies

You for sure felt like Chris was a safe space for you. He wasn’t judging you or shaming you. He was kind and understanding, another thing you loved about him.

“Let’s get their donuts.” You say.

-

“Ladies first.” Chris smirks opening the door for you, hands full of donut boxes.

You cheeks burn the heat rising he definitely knew what he was doing being so cheeky.

“Guys I brought snacks!” You shout hoping to catch their attention in the back.

Kiara springs out from the kitchen, hair in a bun outfit covered in flour. “Yes you did, and I’m not talking about the food.” Kiara flirts undressing Chris with her eyes.

Chris erupts in a belly laugh. You knew she was only kidding but you felt a little jealous, even though he wasn’t yours.

“Okay.’ You interrupt sass in your voice. “so I have different assortments of donuts. So take your pick and choose wisely.”

You feel a familiar hand rest on your shoulder. “You okay.” Chris ask eyebrows furrowed.

“Yeah, yes I’m great.” You lie shaking off the bad vibes.

Chris shoots you a small smile, Warming your heart.

You notice Deac coming out of the kitchen. Arms crossed tightly.

“What’s all this.” Deacon speaks.

“Uh this, is me bringing you guys a treat for you hard work.” You motion to all the donuts

“And him.” Deac points at Chris .

The room goes stiff.

Please not now.

Deacon let’s out a sarcastic chuckle. “I just don’t understand, I’ve known your for a long ass time and you’ve never gone out with me, there is always some excuse, but you meet mr. hot shot Hollywood and your all over him. Just don’t be disappointed when he lets you down y/n.” Deacon states practically shouting.

The room was silent as he threw his Apron down rushing out of the building.

Your heart raced, turning to face Chris you notice he was quite red. Clearly flustered but what just went down.

“I should go.” Chris states hesitantly

“How you didn’t drive?” You remind him

“Don’t worry about me.” Chris says turning to walk out.

“Chris Wait!” You shout following him out.

“Y/n, it’s fine I should get going anyway. I don’t wanna damper the party.” Chris admits voice soft

“You aren’t, please don’t be mad.” You plead

Chris brings you in for a hug placing a small kiss on your hairline. “I’m not mad I promise.” Chris states

You both stay embrace in each other for what seems like an eternity.

A sudden shift in Chris body causes your eyes to shoot open. “Shit.” He whispers shouts

Pulling back immediately.

“What, what is it?” You question anxiously

“I got to go, go back inside please.” Chris begs walking away.

You follow his orders walking back in side completely baffled by what’s just happened.

-

Chris’s Point Of View:

Getting back home I quickly get on the phone.

“Megan, yeah we have a problem.” I state prepared to tell her everything.

Everything about how I’d been seeing you, how a pap had just shot about 50 photos of us in the span of .5 seconds.

This wasn’t good, and was the last thing I wanted for you.

“Chris this could be all over the news by tomorrow morning, what were you thinking.” Megan shouts

“I wasn’t! I thought we were safe!” I rebuttle.

“How do you know she didn’t call the paparazzi? It wouldn’t be the first time someone you’ve been talking to has done that.” She reminds me

Sitting back down I place my head in my palms fustrated. “I know I know.” I repeat.

“We can fix this, we have to for y/n’s sake she isn’t ready for the wolves yet.” I speak.

-

A/n: so like I stated previously this is based off the beauty and the baker on abc and I don’t wanna pull to far from that. So Deacon is gonna be our Vanessa 🤣.

But I know things seem rocky but they are in a good spot. Their both confused and now Chris is angry that he put you in that position to get violated by the public.

Kiara is just jokingly flirting nothing serious she supports them!

This is gonna be a long tale for our love birds. ❤️

-

Tag list:

@toniilaney

[kingjasnah]

actually. actually let’s talk about diversity in fantasy let’s give that a go. im mad and im gonna be that way for a while

don’t want to read all this? fair. tldr: fantasy writers who rely not only on the medieval europe model but also hide behind historical accuracy in 2020 (fuck it, from ‘95 onwards) are lazy and unimaginative and should be held accountable no matter how many white 20 year old dudes jerk off to whatever power fantasy is embedded in the plot. so lets chat about that lads. (slightly) drunk rant under the cut

now prelim shit: we know fantasy is used both as escapism and as a way to deal with various traumas via magical metaphor. staples of the genre. even if jk rowling busted out the laziest and at times offensive metaphor for ww2 and racism ive ever seen, she still adhered to time and true tropes. whatever.

so why have we, in this post game of thrones era, become insanely obsessed with realism? i can hear sixty 20-something year old men crying at me rn like oh ohh oh its based off the war of roses oh wahh all medieval fantasy fiction is based off england and the crusades anyway so women should get raped and people of color should be demonized its not racism its xenophobia and also gay people dont exist and disabled people are systematically killed off and if we stretch the magic fixes mental illness thing a LITTLE further we have straight up eugenics.

we all know where the england but myth thing came from. now the thing about tolkien is that while i will always absolutely love lotr, looking at the LAZY state of fantasy? damn i kinda wish he hadn’t revolutionized the genre. the bitch was still racist. he still didnt give a shit abt women (eowyn was just a vehicle to show how much he fucking hated macbeth anyone holding jrrt up as a feminist icon for that needs to sit the fuck down and explain to me why i can count the woman speaking roles in lotr, a story with a name and fleshed out backstory for every minor character, on one hand but thats! another post). he had something to say abt class with sam i’ll give him that but he is still 100% NOT what we need to hold our standards to in 2020. 

i dont want to talk about old school fantasy, like 80s early 90s cause theres literally no point. its sexist, racist, ableist for sure, this we know. david eddings (not even that old school tbh) can rise from the grave and explain himself to me personally and i still wont forgive him for ehlana. 

so let’s talk historical accuracy. quick question. who the FUCK gives a shit? WHO is this elusive got fan who’s out here like blehh actually??? this method of iron production is TOTALLY anachronistic of the time. ummm these vegetables in this fictional world were NOT native to english soil so how are they here? cause i know this is the classic argument but ive never actually met someone who cared about the lack of dysentery as much as they care abt the women getting raped on screen/page. 

god forbid you have to worldbuild for a second god forbid you can’t rely on the idea of fantasy readers already have in their head god forbid you have an original idea god forbid you spend more than two seconds thinking about ur setting (oh i should mention i dont....really blame GoT for its setting cause of how long ago it was og written but trust me i sure as hell blame grrm for writing a 13 yr old giving ‘consent’ to sex with a grown man within the first couple of chapters) 

If we accept the basic premise of fantasy as escapism, and i AM drunk so i will NOT be finding fuckin. quotes and shit for this but come on tolkien said it himself and as much as i’ll drag him he crafted the simplest and most powerful fantasy metaphors on the board rn. But if we know its escapism. If we know. then who is it escapism for? certainly not for me, the gay brown woman who busted through all of GoT in 10th grade. 

modern fantasy lit used as an excuse for that white male power fantasy is literally disgusting. calling historical accuracy is so fucking dumb ESPECIALLY cause we, as ppl in the 21st  century, KNOW women have been consistently written out of the story. poc ppl, gay and trans ppl, anyone with a god forbid disability has been WRITTEN out of history as we know it, INCLUDING the fucking war of the roses so HOW can we hold up testimony we know is flawed to support our FICTIONAL. STORY. just to??? support the white power fantasy?? literally noah fence but if you are a white guy who felt really empowered by every time jim butcher described a woman tell me: how do you think that’ll hold up in classic HisToRiCaL fantasy. you think thats a fucking noble pursuit? or are you grima wormtongue out here. 

(side note: jim butcher stop writing challenge i dont need to know abt every woman on page’s nipples. anyone who hides behind subgenre like that? ‘ohhh its a noir story thats why hes sexualizing everyone’ shut the fuck up an author isnt possessed by a fuckin muse and compelled to bust out 500k they have agency and they have choice and they MADE the choice to reserve said will for none of their female characters)

which brings me to point 2: target audience and BOY is the alcohol hitting me rn but WHO is this for? this isnt the fucking 80s we know poc and other marginalized folk read fantasy FOR the escapism. on god ive had a cosmere focused blog for nearly three years and. im just gonna say it im interacted with A LOT of yall and ive managed to talk to VERY few white straight ppl as compared to everyone else. 

like....who deserves to see the metaphor on homophobia or racism. joanne rowling? the bitch who literally tried to sell us happy slaves and the disgusting aids metaphor and the worst case of antisemitic stereotypes i ever saw in an nyt bestseller? yall think that was for US? or was it for the white guilt crowd. 

literally white people can find any book about them that they can relate to. but hmmm maybe theres a reason gay women care so much about stormlight archive’s jasnah kholin, a brown woman who’s heavily coded as wlw. or kaladin, the FIRST fantasy protag ive ever seen with clinical depression. hmm i wonder why a bunch of millennials are vibing all of a sudden. im not saying sanderson is perfect--but its the best ive seen from a white author tbh

maybe theres a reason a lot of poc vibe with a literary way to express trauma, and maybe thats why i specifically get so pissed when its not done well. theres a REASON books about outcasts pushing through and claiming their own lives are popular with people who arent white and straight and able bodied. Junot Diaz had a point. maybe lets STOP catering to those assholes who think theyre joseph campbell’s wet dream personified. ive lost respect SO many authors who are objectively talented. pat rothfuss can write so beautifully that ive cried to bits of name of the wind but literally i will never pick that series up again (not just because of the felurian. women in general tbh. mostly the felurian ngl) cause 1) i personally KNEW men whod jerk off to that shit and 2) there was no need for it there was no plot reason for ANY of that shit 

so like obviously thers an issue with authors of color specifically not getting recognized for fantasy and genre work but on god??????? im still mostly mad at the legions of white authors churning out the same medieval england chosen one books year after fucking year. have an original thought maybe. also im sorry that you as an author lack the basic empathy needed to examine the way that women? or any group of people that youre explicitly writing about see the world and would specifically see YOUR made up world. 

yes your fantasy should be diverse, but more than that it should be kind. if you as a writer cant respect groups of people who deserve it....what the hell are you doing in a genre that traditionally is about finding ways to express injustice through metaphor? tolkien’s hero was sam. fantasy was NEVER about the privileged. yall know who you are so stop acting so fucking entitled. peace out. 

[wincore]

AHHHH ive been working all weekend at my part time job and reading ur wips/ideas literally got me thru it!!

WHEN U CATCH UP ON HAIKYUU U GOTTA LET ME KNOWWW omg who was ur favorite character from what u watched?? mine is kuroo & atsumu (s4)!! if u have any anime or drama reccs id gladly take them 🤲🏻🤲🏻

when do you hear back abt grad school btw!! :o like what’s the timeline for applying & hearing back?

OFC I LIKE THEM?? I LIKE ALL UR IDEAS!!!

DISOBEYING FATE??? does this mean 2 ppl who are nonsoulmates are pretending to be together/are together 👀👀 IS THIS GONNA BE ANGSTY!! u know i live for the tension... and u know i love the way u write it!!!! a more flirty and annoying yn sounds so fun to read omg

“this fashion designer fic is dedicated to you tata 💝” IM HONORED TO CONTRIBUTE TO TAEYONG’S DUNGEON ESCAPE HWHSHJSJ will there be runway character cameos 😳😳

“AFTER TWILIGHT” HELP MEEEEE i cant tell who in nomin is edward and who’s jacob.... jeno edward?? LOL

EVERY ROMANCE PLOT SUITS JAEMIN OMGGG SO TRUE WAIT THAT REMINDS ME pls tell me the tropes/plots that u associate with the members!! or which tropes u think suit them well, any pairings that rlly stand out to u. obviously we are both pro e2l & doyoung HSJWJJS but who/what else!!! i am a person fan of yukhei with the f2l/campus crush/heartthrob bestie trope.

ALSO i kinda went off the grid around the time u did that poll about people’s favorite fanfic tropes/plots so i didn’t see any updates on it!! did u find anything interesting from that survey?? :o

I HOPE UR HAVING A GOOD WEEK MOONIE 💛

- tata 💖

THAT MAKES ME SO HAPPY AHHH omg i hope your part time offers enough wage for all that work!!! i would be so mad if i had to work over the weekend (but.. then again.. i’m aiming for ..corporate jobs..)

OMG omg okay this is going to get REALLY longer now tata!!!! i think this is where i should include a keep reading 😭

LET ME TELL YOU I HAD THIS MASSIVE CRUSH ON OIKAWA like his character just got to me!! i think i even wrote a character analysis for him back then LOL when i tell you 15 year old me was absolutely enamored with a 2d man. i loved kuroo too omg and the whole nekoma team he was just so chill i wanted to be him 🤩 and i’ve seen pictures of atsumu from my friends!!! who keep spamming me bc they too are in love with 2d men and he looks like someone who would cause problems on purpose but that could just be me sdkdhsj 

and ooh, i have so many dramas/animes i’ve been meaning to watch but recently in kdramas, i watched run on which was super cute and i love the female lead; extracurricular oh BOY i love this. i love thrillers and crime fiction. like SO much. it’s a shame i can’t make my own 😔; and now i’m currently watching vincenzo which is a dark comedy about a korean-italian mafia man and it’s rlly funny at times and also i like the theme of evil fights evil bc i am tired of main characters with moral compasses 🙄🙄 it’s ongoing though!! my friends recommended true beauty and love alarm to me but the way they are sobbing over it i am very afraid. i was also planning to watch perfect crime (jdrama) bc my friend is obsessed with sakurada dori. <3

my all time fav animes are still one piece (which i still havent caught up with bc i am so slow) and demon slayer!! i havent watched much anime recently but i watched the ancient animagus’ bride (?? i think that’s the name?) it’s got SUPER pretty visuals and i was in awe of the animation most of the time.

i also watched this japanese movie fairly recently called shoplifters and it’s also crime technically but discusses more of japanese poverty and my feelings throughout the movie were like 📈📉📈📉 and it’s so well directed!!! i think it’s the same director as for after the storm!! idk if you’ve watched that but it was really good too!

i apply to grad school next year!! i’ll be joining in the fall semester so i have to get stuff ready by april and that’s when most of the applications start!! the scholarship im aiming for begins earlier though and like. ma’am slow down i don’t even get my degree that early i’ll have to use a provisional certificate now😭

YES about the soulmates omg hhh the official synopsis is this: 

if finding your soulmate is the same as a damn game of russian roulette, you are determined to not pull the trigger at all. except, you know who your soulmate is and he doesn’t—and given a choice to pretend, you find that jaehyun is the lesser of the two burdens to bear.

like jaehyun is not the soulmate but yn doesn’t want her soulmate bc a) he’s in a relationship and doesn’t rlly care about the soulmate system which hurt bc she’s even lonelier now 😔 and b) she thinks money > love but that’s just a coping mechanism for being a lonely (and romantically repressed) person as is her being annoying and nosy LOL. i will end the analysis of my own character here jshgdksh

YES TO RUNWAY CHARACTER CAMEOS and yes you are literally the reason taeyong is escaping the dungeon

PLS neither jeno or nomin can be blue screen filtered brooding men i would be so uncomfortable 😭😭 IMD YING DGKSHDK if jeno plays edward i need him to that apple scene like taemin did ♥

okay so i have nct dream categorized in this way (i feel like it’s kind of biased towards bff2l whoops):

bff2l - mark, jeno, jaemin, jisung

e2l - haechan, renjun

either - chenle

but adding to that, lucas is definitely the campus crush bff you’re secretly in love with but you just can’t tell him!!! he’s too hot and popular for his own good!!!! but a series of romcom-esque events will help you probably LOL (bonus points if it’s fake dating)

if it isn’t e2l with doyoung i will respectfully not accept it as valid ❤

i also associate xiaojun with bff2l likee they’re always together on campus to the point that people think they’re dating also xiaojun majors in music and gets complimented on his lyricism often but like every song’s about you lol and one day he’s like wait is it copyright infringement if he’s using your existence in his songs bc boy are you a work of art ;)

i think sicheng would do REALLY well in royalty aus like hello??? he already has the looks and the poise. also chaebol aus might also work bc what are corporate businesses but modern day kingdoms </3 bonus points if it’s e2l but idk how you beefing with sicheng would work like . i don’t think he can fight like ever y/n will bench press him.

jaehyun is another person who seems to go with any vibe/plot like mans really said i will not give you any onscreen idol personality to work with ❤ 

i think most of them would pair well with bff2l?? they are all so silly and seem like they’d be great friends LOL except they’re too good looking.

and oh!!! i don’t think i posted the results OOPS let me add them real quick.

the readability is low on this bc google sacrificed that for uniformity 🙄

but the ones i had as options were (in the same order):

i hope you have a great wekk too tata!!!!!! answering this ask boosted my energy for the week 🥰🌼

[bunteatime]

aramika coffee shop au pt. 1

ok so!! ive had this au in my head for like.. 5 months now and i luv it sm so i decided to turn it into a lil fic!! im still workin on tha story but i couldnt wait 2 post it so here is part 1..

(also!! apologies if this is written poorly!! its one of tha first times ive ever tried to like. seriously write)

Part 1: Arashi’s POV

Arashi took a step forward. She was standing right in front of a small cafe. It was located in the middle of the city so it was usually quite busy. However, she had arrived just before opening. She smiled and tightened her work apron. 

She wasn’t normally too fond of the idea of working but there was just something so romantic about working in a coffee shop. She had read so many books about two lovers meeting in a coffee shop and the thought of meeting the love of her life while at the cafe practically made her swoon. What if she met the love of her life today? What would they look like? Would they sweep her off her feet the second they saw her? More importantly, would she even realize who they were before it was too late?

Quite suddenly, she snapped out of her daze and look around. Focus, Arashi, she told herself confidently. She stepped inside the cafe and was instantly greeted with the smell of coffee beans and Leo waving at her.

 “Hey, Naru-chan!!” He said almost too excitedly considering how early it was. 

“Hello hello Leo!” she giggled and waved back. 

Just then, Izumi walked in while glaring at his phone. Arashi could’ve sworn she heard him make a little tch sound. 

“Oh, hi Izumi! What’s wrong?” She frowned. 

“Tsukasa won’t be coming in today. Apparently, he fell ill.” He huffed back. 

���Ah, well that’s alright. We still have the four of us!” She attempted to comfort him. Izumi could get worked up so easily, it seemed. 

“Three of us. Ritsu slept in again and knowing him he probably won’t show up until the end of the day.” 

Arashi sighed and looked at her phone. They only had about ten before the coffee shop opened. She would be extra busy today, considering there were only three people working that day. She wished that she could’ve been sick too, so she could just sit at home and paint her nails all day rather than spend it making coffee. She didn’t mind too much though; the pay was really good and with that, she could go out shopping this weekend. She got behind the counter and scrolled through Instagram to pass time. 

“Oh! Before I forget, Naru-chan, there’s gonna be this guy coming sometime around now with a bunch of pastries for the shop! I thought I’d be the one to accept them from him but Izumi-chan said he wanted to ‘talk finances’ with me so would you do it for me?” He smiled brightly at her. She seriously didn’t understand how he could be so peppy at 6 am on a Monday. 

“Of course, dear! Leave it to me.” She winked at him and smiled. 

Leo suddenly got really serious. “If I’m not back in an hour, just know that I died of boredom listening to Izumi talk about stupid adult things.” He said in a scared tone. 

Arashi giggled and pushed him towards the back. “Yes, yes, I’m sure you’ll be fine.” She responded. 

Leo went into the back and it was officially opening time. Looks like I’ll be all on my own this morning, she told herself with a sigh. She walked over to the front of the store and flipped the sign on the front door to the side that said “open” in a cursive font. On her way back to the counter, she straightened some of the chairs and unwrinkled the tablecloths. She was curious over the pastries Leo had mentioned. She assumed they were from a new store than they usually bought their pastries because the usual store wouldn’t send anyone to drop them off. 

The first twenty or so minutes after the opening of the store went well. She had about ten customers come in, all of which looked like college kids wanting to study before class. Just then, the door was opened rather loudly and a boy with shaggy greenish-black hair stumbled in. He was carrying a large box with him and seemed to be out of breath. Did he run all the way here? He was wearing a black sweater and jeans, despite it being the middle of summer. He came up to the front counter and set the box down. The moment he looked up at Arashi, she almost gasped. He had absolutely stunning eyes. One was a beautiful ocean blue while the other was golden. Arashi wondered what they called that. Heterochromia? Was that right? She’d have to look it up later. His eyes were so captivating that she felt like she couldn’t look away.

“Uhm, hello! What can I get for you today, babe?” She asked. 

“Well, uh, ‘m not really here to buy anythin’. Coffee ain’t really my thing… too bitter.” He stuck his tongue out a little bit as he said that. “I dunno if you know but I’m here to deliver some pastries!” He rubbed the back of his neck nervously.

As soon as she heard him speak, Arashi felt butterflies in her stomach. Fate had just set her up with the absolute cutest boy she’s ever seen and she was so happy. She was absolutely enamored with him. His accent was absolutely adorable and the way he looked down and played with his sleeves shyly as he explained the situation to her made her think that she might die from a cuteness overload. He was just so cute! She’d known this boy for maybe 60 seconds and she had already unashamedly fallen head over heels for him. He was perfect. 

He looked back up at her and they stared at each other for what felt like a blissful eternity, before looking back down awkwardly. His face was bright red. Oh how absolutely adorable he looked when he blushed like that. 

“I, uhm, I should go… Oshi-san’ll be real mad at me if ‘m not back soon..” He said shyly. It might’ve been her imagination but Arashi could’ve sworn she heard a little regret in his voice. 

“Oh, yes, yes of course!” She responded quickly. “Thank you so much for the pastries!” She smiled.

He smiled back at her and began to walk away. Right as he was about to open the door and leave she spoke up again. 

“Also… Your eyes are absolutely gorgeous, babe.” She winked at him and watched as his eyes widened and his face went tomato red again. 

“Th- thank you…” He said quietly and proceeded to leave.

She giggled and sighed as she rested her hand on her head. She was in love, wasn’t she? That was the prettiest boy she had ever seen and with only one interaction between them, she had fallen in love. She wasn’t complaining, though. She absolutely loved the feeling of butterflies in her stomach as she thought about the next time she would see him. 

“Arashi, you’re slacking.” Izumi’s voice spoke behind her. She could almost feel the glare she knew he was giving her.

“Oh my god, Izumi! You won’t believe what just happened.” She said excitedly.

Part 1: Mika’s POV

Mika sighed loudly and rubbed the back of his neck. He had been up since four making pastries. He was starting to get sick of the sweet smell, but he knew Shu would be mad at him if he stopped working. 

“Oshi-san,” He whined. “Can I have a break yet?” He was really hoping he could get out of there soon; today was supposed to be his day off but Shu had called him in suddenly. Although, that wasn’t too odd for Shu to do. 

“Actually, yes. You have to take this box of pastries to this cafe, though.” He handed him a piece of paper with an address written on it in cursive handwriting. “Do not be late, Kagehira. You’ll ruin our business’ reputation.” 

“Will do, Oshi-san!” Mika responded happily. He picked up the box and practically ran out the door.

Once he was outside, he sighed happily. He was glad he wasn’t inside anymore. He hurried over in the direction of the store, however, he got lost along the way. He somehow ended up in the shopping district and couldn’t find his way out. Shit, he panicked. Oshi-san’s gonna get mad at me if ‘m late. It took him a while, but he finally found his way to the coffee shop, however, he was ten minutes late. He would’ve been later if he hadn’t run the whole way. Maybe Shu wouldn’t get as mad at him if he lied and said he had just wandered around after taking the pastries to the cafe?

He went to pull the door open, but it wouldn’t. He tried again and it still wouldn’t open. He tried a third time before reading a sign that said “push” right next to the door. He embarrassedly pushed the door open and stumbled inside the store. He glanced up at the girl at the register and immediately looked down. Oh no, she was pretty. Like, really pretty. Stunning, even. He felt embarrassed. He walked up to the counter and set the box of pastries down before mustering up his courage and looking back up at her. 

Oh god, he was right the first time. She really was pretty. Her eyes were sparkling. They were a deep purple and so so pretty. Her hair was beautiful, too. She looked so effortlessly stunning and it honestly took his breath away. Her smile was stunning, too. She radiated warmth and he found her presence to be oddly comforting, despite knowing her for thirty seconds. 

“Uhm, hello! What can I get for you today, babe?” She said. Did she.. Did she just call him babe? He was falling for her so hard and so fast it almost scared him. He never considered himself the romantic type, but this girl made him feel butterflies in his stomach.

“Well, uh, ‘m not really here to buy anythin’. Coffee ain’t really my thing... too bitter.” He stuck his tongue out and he heard her giggle at that. He immediately blushed and started fidgeting with his sleeves. “I dunno if you know but I’m here to deliver some pastries!” He gestured at the box and rubbed his neck with his hand. It was a nervous habit of his to do that, and he sure was nervous right now. He really hoped that she didn’t find him weird.

He looked back up at her and as soon as their eyes met, he felt those famous butterflies that he didn’t know existed outside of stories. Her eyes were deep purple and stunning. He couldn’t look away. She was smiling at him and it seemed so comforting. He felt like he could stare at her for an eternity and still be as blissful as he was at this moment. 

He looked down nervously and could feel the heat rising to his cheeks. He suddenly remembered that he had to get back to the bakery or else Shu would be angry at him. 

“I, uhm, I should go… Oshi-san’ll be real mad at me if ‘m not back soon..” Mika said, trying not to show how sad he felt about having to say those words. The way she had gazed into his eyes was unlike the way anyone had looked at him before. He constantly felt as if people were judging him for his eyes. That he was weird for his mismatched orbs. Due to this, he absolutely hated them. He resented them and they made him feel terrible. 

This girl, though, she was different. She didn’t judge them, in fact, her gaze was so full of wonder. She was looking at him with so much kindness and warmth that he thought he might melt right then and there. She made him so happy, which was completely absurd considering he had known her for maybe three minutes. 

“Oh, yes, yes, of course!” She responded, quickly looking away. She smiled brightly at him. “Thank you so much for the pastries!”

Oh, god, she was so pretty. He started to walk away and right as he opened to door to leave, she called out to him. 

“Also… your eyes are absolutely gorgeous, babe.” She winked at him. Oh no. Oh no, oh no. Mika had tried so hard during the entirety of their conversation to keep calm and seem cool but he couldn’t handle it anymore. His face immediately went as red as a tomato, despite his wishes. That was the first time anyone had complimented his eyes before. He was shocked. This whole time he had absolutely hated his eyes. But for the first time, he liked them. They made him happy. And it was all because this girl, whom he had undoubtedly fallen in love with, had complimented him with complete sincerity. 

“Th-thank you…” He stuttered. He clumsily opened the door and walked out. He just knew that he had to tell Shu about this girl when he got back to the shop. 

When he arrived back at the shop, he suddenly stopped right in front of the door. “Shit, I forgot to ask her name..”

[wongiemei]

iKON Relationship with New Girl Member

Jinhwan:

Basically, her dad

Takes care of her the most dealing with her problems

He’s the oldest and he is used to dealing with the boys’ shit so he can handle hers too

But sometimes, it can be overwhelming

The girl member would listen to him like he would for her

Whenever she gets in trouble, he would always defend her (which annoys Bin a lot)

When she’s in that *cough* time *cough*, she would be the most comfortable with him

Jinhwan wouldn’t hesitate but go to the store 2 streets down and buy her chocolate, medicine, heating packs, chips, and tampons/pads

out of all the boys, she would trust him the most

if she needs something, she would go to him first

jinhwan loves to brag about that to the boys

he also loves the fact that someone is finally shorter than him

the boys still call him short but the girl defends him saying he’s taller than her

if anything, they should call her short

the first time it happened, jinhwan almost cried bc finally someone stood up for him

whenever he’s upset or hurt by what the others said, he hides it but she can usually tell 

the only one he speaks his problems to

she experiments with makeup on him since he’s the only one who lets her

ngl, she’s actually pretty good

‘i didn’t spend 2 all-nighters watching jeffree star and james charles for nothing’

but as long as he sees that bright smile, he’s happy

i think he would be the im-never-letting-you-go type with her because he sees her as the girl he saw for the very first time

shy and innocent

and he will be damned if someone corrupts her

Yunhyeong:

if Jinhwan is her dad, he’s her mom

makes sure she does laundry, gets up early, goes to bed on time, showers before the boys

will feed and cook for the girl even when he’s tired

thinks shes the cutest little thing

but he knows that if he finds chanwoo and her are talking amongst themselves, shes gone

gets pranked on the most

the boys would use the girl to take advantage of his kindness to her for a prank

then the girl would be guilty later on and secretly tell song what theyre planning

believe it or not, yunghyeong is pretty scary when he’s mad

so she rats the others out bc she knows he wont punish her and she could watch the boys suffer

its like killing 2 birds with one stone

but really, she appreciates him

without him, she would be stuck eating delivery and ramen every night

since she rooms with him, chanwoo, and hanbin, hes always cooking something

ikonics see her a lot in his vlives and YT channel

when he went to the jungle, she was very worried

‘hyung, you’re going to get sick there! who’s going to feed me when you’re gone? you know Bin can’t cook for shit!’

‘yah! do you only see me as your chef?!’

‘what do you mean i can’t cook?!’

he looks out for her a lot

during ikontv, she was the only one excited for the mungap trip

out of all the boys, she appreciates him the most

okay, maybe she appreciates him and jinhwan the most

but, he was the one who made her feel welcome and tried the most to help her fit in and make sure she was comfortable

will never forget when he left her a tray of food at her door when she refused to leave her new room

there was a post-it note with encouraging words and she still has it to this day

just a wholesome mother-daughter relationship that will never be broken

Bobby:

oh, my baby

as i mentioned in the earlier post, he wasn’t very upset but he wasnt happy

but he wasnt upset enough to make her feel uncomfortable

bc jiwon is such a baby and so nice that he subtly helps her

over time, they build a cute relationship where he is like her older brother

steals her food all the time

‘no! song-hyung cooked that for me! Only for me!’

‘yah! it’s rude not to share with your elders!’

‘*mumbling* wdym elder. you’re practically a 5 year old’

jiwon has no mean bone in his body and you were practically an angel to him

well, when you’re not fooling around or goofing off

although he thought you wouldnt survive in iKON, he tries to help you as much as he can

even though bin is literally a big butt and gives you a hard time, jiwon helps you

like the time bin screamed at you because you couldnt get the dance right and you, being a strong woman who wouldnt let people push you around, screamed at him too

it resulted to you having a screaming match and the elders having to push you back because you were so close to punching him in the face and the youngers holding bin because he wouldnt hesitate to come at you

more on that in a sec

but you slammed the practice room shut and walked to the river to cool down

granted you were new to korea and didnt really know where you were going, you went to the place the guys took you to

bobby found you crying there and hes a very awkward little bean so it was hard for him to comfort you

since youre a girl and all

but you wrapped your arms around him and cried to his chest *cue confused and frozen bobby*

jiwon slowly wrapped his arms around you and whispered sweet nothings into your ear

since then, hes vowed to protect you bc youre basically the little sister hes wanted

B.I:

okay, lets get this bread

as i said in the beginning, he didnt like you

aT aLL

he wanted to give you a hard time bc he wanted to see how long you would last

these boys have been with him since their survival days and suddenly this girl comes in? no thanks bitch

but i think bin is just really frustrated bc he couldnt figure you out

the others, he knows like the back of his hands

but you? he doesnt know shit about you

*cue his bratty self*

we all know bin is actually a soft little puppy who needs to be protected by iKONICS and will sacrifice himself for his boys

and dont worry, he will soon come to love you too

when you locked yourself up in your room, jinhwan grabbed his ear and pulled him outside to scold him

but it resulted to bin and jinhwan arguing

‘if you dont get your shit together, we’re going to have some problems. you’re the leader arent you? then act like it’

every day you try to be nice to him but he just shrugs and sometimes even outright ignore you

but as time goes on, hanbin slowly figures you out

youre still scared of him and thinks hes a douche but you can see hes trying

he really is trying

he picks up your weird habits like unintentionally pout when you dont understand something or the tip of your nose sweating when youre nervous

before, he used to not ask for your input in any tracks but it has come to the point he would knock at your door in the ungodly time of 2 in the morning, asking if the draft is good

love scenario was your guys’ combined efforts

there will be an imagine with that^

since you came in bling bling era, he didnt really give you a lot of lines because he couldnt figure out your voice and your strengths

but now, he knows you very well too

‘yah, be careful. dont be eating a lot of that ice cream. you shouldnt even have any in the first place. youre lactose intolerant, remember?’

‘yes, bin. i think id remember if there was something wrong with me.’

there are petty little fights between you guys that used to be mean and hurtful but are now playful and downright cute

but that dreaded day of your biggest fight yet

in love scenario during bobby’s rap, there’s that fast move that even the others struggled in

but hanbin already got it nailed down bc hes a GOD

but you were struggling the most and hanbin tried to be patient and help you

it was just hard for you and you couldnt get it right

by the 100th time of him repeating it over and over again, he exploded

‘yah! how are you a dancer when you couldnt even get this right!’

you looked down ashamed while mumbling ‘sorry’

he yells again and you mess up 

AGAIN

he throws his hat down and gets up towards you

‘if you cant do it correctly, why bother with it? go home. you’re done’

jinhwan nervously puts a hand on his shoulder and goes in between them to try and difuse the situation

‘hanbin-ah. we’re having a hard time too. its not just her. the dance is just hard.’

‘i dont get we’ve done WAY harder choreo than this’

‘well, hanbin, remember. she wasnt here for that.’

‘maybe it was a mistake to put her here then. she isnt ready.’

you look up at him with flaring eyes

‘listen, you dont know anything that ive been through to get to where i am today so dont even say im not ready. YOU DONT KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ME!’

everyone stayed silent, even the maknaes bc theyve never seen her lash out like that

hanbin scoffed.

‘maybe if you actually opened up yourself to us and not hide in your damn room all day’

she stomped to him and pushed him

‘no MAYBE if you pulled your head out of your ass and take the time to get to know me then maybe you would! but NO! you decide to be a little bitch and throw tantrums just bc a girl joined your group. was your ego hurt that yg sent a girl to you? that you would need someone to make sure that this group doesnt crumble to the ground? bc with the way youre acting, the guys arent here just because youre a good leader. YOURE A TYRANT! THATS ALL YOU WOULD EVER BE!’

shit

Hanbin was FURIOUS

he pushed her back and the guys held on to them

you pushed them away and sent one last hateful glare before you made your way to the door

‘but dont worry, kim hanbin. because ill send my resignation letter to yang in the morning. im not putting up with your shit any longer’

there will be a whole ass imagine about that so it will contain when yall make up

but after that, yall are so cool

his sister loves you and he might start having a ‘thing’ 

more on that in a sec

Donghyuck:

oof my baby sunshine

previously stated, he was the only one excited for your arrival

so obvs, yall are very tight

you, bob, and dong do vlives together a lot and ikonics look forward to it all the time

always cheers you up

remember that prank for ikon tv where dong literally started comforting the girl?

well, he does that to you

he knows when you start to get upset and he rubs your back

sometimes, just a hug from him makes it all better

did i mention that he gives out the warmest hugs?

ace dancers

both of you love to do covers as bonding time

whenever you can’t sleep, you just go to the other dorm and go under the covers while he sings to you

he sees you as his little sister and reminds him of his own little sister back home

btw, he loves to give you gifts

but so do you

when yall were filming ikon tv, he always picked up something that reminded him of you

like when he went shopping with bobby for their studio, he got you a little cute figurine that you still have to this day

or when you went to lotte mall for your day off and bought him a little necklace

fans get excited bc they always see matching yall have

the two of you wear the most fan gifts

like when someone gave hanbin a shirt, you snatch it and wear it

like how dong takes bobby’s clothing

yall are so cute together and fans wish they had a brother or a sister like yall

Junhoe:

this hoe

jk, but he really looks hot in this one

yes, he hated you in the beginning but once he found out similarities between you, he started tolerating you

also to him, i think he oesnt like the fact that him and the others worked so hard to get where they are and he doesnt really know what you went through to get there

junhoe has the personality that may seem very cold at first but he easily opens up to others and that causes them to open up to him

he knows the struggles you went through to be in ikon

you’re older than him by a few months and you treat him like your child

‘junhoe-ah! dont forget to take your makeup off!’

‘yah! clean your room! its like a pigsty!’

he gets annoyed with it but he knows you just look out for him

he calls you ‘noona’ with that cute ass smile if he wants something

how can you say no to that

yalls laughs are so loud and yall are just loud in general

one time, yall had a competition on who could sing louder and the guys almost banned you from the apartment complex

the neighbors weren’t happy

he always asks you for fashion advice even though you don’t have a good fashion taste

you have the habit of spoiling him of clothes and shoes

‘noona, you don’t need to do this. take them back’

‘wtf they’re from busan. i’m not about to take a train ride there to return those. keep them.’

his mom absolutely adores you

always tells you to look after him and junhoe blushing like a maniac

‘mom, i’m bigger than her. i think she’d need more protecting than me’

he turns red whenever you pinch his cheeks together 

ngl, he had a crush on you but it faded away when he saw another member having a crush on you too

hes scared of him so hed rather back off

but you love him a lot and comfort him bc hes a little baby that really needs to be looked after

Chanwoo:

fuck, so cute

at first, chanwoo ignored you and made sure you were uncomfortable

even going as far as to disrespecting you

like being rude and being un-chanwoo

lets just say yunhyeong beat it out of him

as the youngest member, you baby him the most

‘oh, my little baby!’

initially, he was uncomfortable with it 

but now, he lives for it

pouts when you give another member too much attention

teases you about your short height all the time

helps you grocery shop mainly for him to carry the bags

‘dont worry, noona. im strong’

you find out that chanwoo actually joined the group last and had a hard time fitting in

you used this to your advantage to get closer to him with your similar situations

‘you know, being in an unfamiliar environment is hard. but having someone who understands your feelings makes it easier’

and he just looks up to you with those big brown eyes and you just melt

gamer buddies

love to go to pc cafes even though yall have your own respective computers at home

only goes for the food

always calls him when you’re stuck in one level

*cute Hanbin’s voice*

‘CHANWOO-YAH!!!! JUNG CHANWOO!!!’

even though he might act like a bitch sometimes, hes actually so soft and cute

hes your little baby and will always be your little baby even though yall are like 80

[virgook]

hii!!! pt. 2

“hehe but i’m definitely working to trust myself and my intuition more. like the times i’ve been validated via ppl’s astro posts or tarot readings like yours or even the boys themselves makes me feel more confident in my ability to read people. so thank you for the encouragement and being open to my thoughts. 🤗💖🤗💖🤗💖” i’m glad!! + tell me about your hunches so i can see what my cards say too + my own opinion

“i feel he works in stages. sub!jk —> brattysub!jk —> switch!jk —> dom!jk ” A THOUSAND PERCENT those were my exact thoughts 😭and after dom!jk sleeps, he wakes up soft bunny!jk again ready to be smothered in affection. should we……co-write a fic….

“i’m actually so happy i decided to talk to you. i normally just chill in the back and don’t interact too much but it’s been a fun time so far chatting with you 😬” i’m so glad too!!! i’m having a lot of fun and this is all actually really new to me too. ive been on tumblr for years and years but didn’t talk much so this is making all my 15yr old dreams come true if im being honest

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!i love cats so much you have no idea omg if you have a picture of the stray cat pls will u upload it so i can gush?? ever since i graduated from uni i’ve been cat-less :( there were so many of them on campus and i’d pet them whenever i was stressed but now [deep sigh]

jin’s reading

i agree with the class clown syndrome!!!!!! i hadn’t thought of it that way but i can geel it in my gut you’re so right.

same, i hope jimin can see himself that way too :( i feel like jimin tries so hard to be perfect or the ‘right’ thing that he doesn’t understand how jin can make the best of what he has and be imperfect and still be so beautiful and loved by all. i feel like he’s trying to analyze jin so he can add it to his own 'calculations’ on how to be have but i hope he knows he doesnt have to do that :/

i think jk’s perspective on them isn’t reflective of their closeness but more about jk’s own personality? like he doesn’t think too deeply about things u know? he’s like oh, hyung’s like that i guess. ok. and moves on. … am i making sense? it doesn’t matter to him enough to figure out those questions. he’s simple and loves and cares for them regardless

i agree!!!!!!! i feel furthest from hobi and jin too, esp. hobi. he’s the most intimidating for me in bts actually. like i got so surprised when he got so mad at the has station gag in bvs4 bc it doesn’t fit with his j-hope persona. but i think it’s the real him and its coherent with what my cards have been saying👀

thank you for saying you enjoyed it!!! i was worried bc people really respond to cute, fluffy, imagine type readings of the boys and don’t want to actually know the truth or if you aren’t a believer in tarot, dont want to imagine them as a whole person who is more than 'the happy one’ or 'the cold one’, u know?

jimin’s reading

I don’t know the vlive you’re talking about but it matches behaviour i’ve seen a lot from him omg i think you described him perfectly. i think a lot of it stems from his job? like he’s supposed to think of what the fans will enjoy. but i think theres a way to do that and still be authentic u know? and idk maybe he doesn’t owe it to us to be his real self and wants to be fake. he can do that if he wants but it doesn’t make me like him at all :/ i don’t know if you know NCT’s doyoung but he did that once too in an nctlife episode. they boys were playing the baskin robbins game and they had take turns saying the numbers till 31 in a sexy~ way and doyoung stroked his throat/adams apple and it was so so fake and he even said the fans like this. and he kept doing it and looking at himself in the camera.  its the same vibe as what u said about jimin, i understand exactly what u mean and i agree fully

“but in the moment when he can’t edit or practice before hand what he gives fans is so hollow and superficial… ” yes!!! i think a lot of it comes from his need to be perfect and a certain way so fans love him. so he controls his image very strongly. i think it extends even to his 'vulnerable’ moments on camera. he’s very intelligent and considers the ramifications of all his actions before he does something imho. i think the most genuine parts of him on camera are when a member is hurt or needs help and he goes to comfort or care for them.

“the vibes he can sometimes give off isn’t your typical idol fantasy/fan service thing… it’s deeper than that.” yup!!! all the boys are 'fake’ to an extent bc its their job. like they have to consciously create cute content, that’s their job. but jimin does take it too far, he removes his real self form the equation completely and does whatever is needed.

“i’m just not as forward about wanting it like jimin, which i honestly respect” tbh…..same.. he’s the one who made me admit/realize i like being praised and now i jokingly ask people for it. i pass it off as a joke but i crave it u know 😭😂😩

“and honestly i feel really bad for him……authentically.” oh my god, that’s exactly what i’ve been thinking too!!! its incredible how much on the same wavelength we are. i think you have a really really good understanding jimin and all the boys, you’re so sensitive and perceptive i could hear u talk about them for hours i’m not even exaggerating. i want to hear all your theories and opinions for real. 

the yoongi reading is up tell me what u think of what it says about him and/or your own opinion of who you think he is i’d really really love to hear it actually

[hypmic-writings]

Masterlist~

Masterlist as of8/16/2020~

!Buster Bros!

When their s/o sleeps in their jacket~

Buster Bros relationship headcanons~

When there's a large spider in the house~

Scenario where you're Ichiro's gf and you act like the 'eldest yamada sister' to Jiro and Saburo~

When their s/o has been hiding their heterochromia~

Ichiro Yamada:

When you have a bad day and he cheers you up~

Ichiro live in boyfriend headcanons~

How he celebrates your birthday~

When you're his chubby s/o headcanons~

NSFW First time with Ichiro headcanons~

NSFW Ichiro headcanons~

Ichiro finds out you're pregnant~

NSFW Ichiro with a bratty, bottom s/o~

Ichiro - 6.“Oh my God! You’re in love with her!”~

Being in a triple relationship with Samatoki and Ichiro headcanons~

Ichiro - 9. “I am not losing you again.”~

Ichiro when he accidentally runs into his childhood crush after many years~

Ichiro with a short s/o~

Ichiro - 28. “You did this for me?”~

When his s/o has night terrors~

When their s/o is depressed and having a bad day~

Comforting his s/o and reassuring them that he loves them~

First date with Ichiro~

Ichiro - 54. “God, you feel so good”(NSFW)

Ichiro Soulmate AU

Ichiro - 36. “Where are you right now?”

Ichiro - 19. “It’s kind of like an adventure, right?”

Ichiro - 8. “Let's go to the beach!”

Jiro Yamada:

Jiro relationship headcanons~

When Jiro has a tongue piercing~

Jiro - 35. “Damn, I didn’t think it would hurt this much”

Saburo Yamada:

Saburo meeting his s/o headcanons~

When they have a cute, small s/o~

Wedding day headcanons~

When his s/o has an asthma attack~

Saburo - 10. “My heart hurts whenever I look at you”

Saburo - 22. “Are you implying I’m…attractive?”

+Mad Trigger Crew+

MTC NSFW headcanons~

MTC ideal type~

MTC in a zombie apocalypse~

MTC being protective~

MTC wedding day headcanons~

MTC and pregnancy announcements~

Poly!MTC - 42. “I don’t think we’re going to make it out this time”

Samatoki Aohitsugi:

Riou x Samatoki relationship headcanons~

Juto x Samatoki relationship headcanons~

Samatoki relationship headcanons~

How he celebrates your birthday~

Samatoki cuddling headcanons~

Samatoki running into his crush~

Samatoki NSFW headcanons~

Samatoki husband headcanons~

Samatoki - 38. “I just wanted an easy day with my boyfriend. What’s so wrong with that?”

Samatoki - 34. “The way you flirt is shameful.”

Samatoki - 50. “Don’t use me as an example. I wasn’t a good kid.”

Being in a triple relationship with Samatoki and Ichiro headcanons~

Samatoki when he accidentally runs into his childhood crush after many years~

Samatoki - 20. "I’m sorry if this upsets you, but I’m going to marry her/him.”

When his s/o has night terrors~

When they walk in on their s/o naked~

When you're Nemu's friend and you confess to him~

When their s/o is depressed and having a bad day~

Comforting his s/o and reassuring them that he loves them~

Samatoki showing his s/o off to MCD~

When his s/o plays video games for hours~

When his fem s/o is self-conscious of being 'masculine'~

Samatoki - 69. “Not now, there are people here!”(NSFW)

Samatokix male!reader - 62. “I am not a bottom!”(NSFW)

Samatoki - 59. “Purr for me, kitten”(NSFW)

Samatoki - 4. “How is your hair so soft?”

Samatoki - 54. “God, you feel so good”(NSFW)

Samatoki - 1. “You look stunning tonight”

Juto Iruma

Juto x Samatoki relationship headcanons~

Juto NSFW headcanons~

Juto with a small, timid s/o~

Juto - "48. “Is there a special reason, as to why you’re wearing my shirt?”

Juto husband headcanons~

Domestic Juto headcanons~

Juto taking his partner on vacations headcanons~

When he's your high school sweetheart~

Juto - 21. “Why would you think I wouldn’t want to help you”

Riou Busujima:

Riou x Samatoki relatinship headcanons~

NSFW Riou headcanons~

Riou - 48. “Is there a special reason, as to why you’re wearing my shirt?”

Fluffy Riou headcanons~

Riou - 9. “Can I lay next to you for a bit?”

**Fling Posse**

NSFW Fling Posse headcanons~

Fling Posse playing UNO~

Ramuda Amemura:

Ramuda relationship headcanons~

Ramuda x Jakurai TDD friendship headcanons~

Jealous Ramuda scenario~

Ramuda with a short s/o headcanons~

Ramuda x Gentaro headcanons~

Yandere!Ramuda scenario~

Ramuda finds out you're pregnant~

Ramuda dating a famous s/o~

When his s/o tries to make him blush~

Ramuda - 2. “Did you enjoy yourself last night?” and 7. “You make me feel like I’m not good enough.”

NSFW Ramuda headcanons~

Ramuda - 1. “I don’t want to have a baby.”~

Ramuda - 1. “I don’t want to have a baby.” PART 2~

Comforting his s/o and reassuring them that he loves them~

When they have a cute, small s/o~

Ramuda falling in love with a 'plain jane'~

Ramuda x Jakurai "Safe words are imporant,"(NSFW)

Ramuda - 56. “I love it when you put your hands there”

Gentaro Yumeno:

SFW/NSFW Gentaro headcanons~

Gentaro with s/o headcanons~

Ramuda x Gentaro headcanons~

How Gentaro teases Dice headcanons~

Gentaro x Dice headcanons~

Gentaro with an s/o who has trust issues headcanons~

Gentaro - 35. “I waited and waited, but you never came back.”

When they walk in on their s/o naked~

Gentaro with a shy s/o~

When their s/o is an idol~

When he's your high school sweetheart~

Gentaro x Dice (Hogwarts!AU) - 5. “I just want to live in this moment forever”

Gentaro - 72. “I can never get enough of your lips”(NSFW)

Gentaro - Soulmate AU

DicexGentaro - Royalty!AU - 1. “You look stunning tonight”

Gentaro - 71. “Your skin is so soft”(slightly NSFW)

Gentaro - 10. “My heart hurts whenever I look at you”

Dice Arisugawa:

Dice relationship headcanons~

Dice with a small s/o headcanons~

Dice with a pregnant s/o headcanons~

Gentaro x Dice headcanons~

Headcanons when his s/o has anxiety~

Angsty Dice gambling headcanons~

Dice - 35. “I waited and waited, but you never came back.” and 39. “Go then, leave! See if I care!”

DicexDoppo - 8. “For some reason I’m attracted to you.”

Gentaro x Dice (Hogwarts!AU) - 5. “I just want to live in this moment forever”

DicexGentaro - Royalty!AU - 1. “You look stunning tonight”

Dice - 70. “I’ve always wanted to try that this!” (NSFW)

~Matenrou~

Matenrou relationship headcanons~

NSFW Matenrou relationship headcanons~

Matenrou wedding headcanons~

Summer with Matenrou~

Jakurai Jinguji:

Ramuda x Jakurai TDD friendship headcanons~

Scenario when you nervously confess to Jakurai~

Jakurai cuddling headcanons~

Jakurai - 25. “I thought you were dead.”

How he takes care of you when you're sick~

Jakurai when he accidentally runs into his childhood crush after many years~

When his s/o tries to make him blush~

NSFW Jakurai as a caretaker~

Jakurai's s/o taking care of him when he's drunk~

When his s/o has a terminal disease~

Assassin!au when you are kidnapped~

When their s/o is depressed and having a bad day~

Jakurai with a small s/o~

Comforting his s/o and reassuring them that he loves them~

When Jakurai is busy and his s/o is lonely~

Jakurai falling for a blind singer~

Ramuda x Jakurai "Safe words are imporant,"(NSFW)

Jakurai - 38. “I hate myself”

Jakurai - 8. “Let’s go to the beach!”

Jakurai - Soulmate AU

Hifumi Izanami:

Hifumi's gf trying to help him with his gynophobia headcanons~

Headcanons when his s/o has anxiety~

Hifumi taking care of his sick s/o~

Posessive Hifumi headcanons~

Hifumi meeting a girl who is afraid of men~

p>Hifumi - 63. “Don’t tease me like that” - NSFW

HifumixDoppo - Hogwarts!AU - 25. “We should totally NOT do that!”

Hifumi - 5. “I just want to live in this moment forever”

Hifumi - 71. “Your skin is so soft”(NSFW)

Doppo Kannonzaka:

Doppo relationship headcanons~

Scenario when you're both depressed but you're strong for him ~

How he celebrates your birthday~

How he relieves stress headcanons~

NSFW Doppo headcanons when you're a sub~

Doppo - 1. “I don’t want to have a baby.”

Headcanons when his s/o has anxiety~

DicexDoppo - 8. “For some reason I’m attracted to you.”

When they walk in on their s/o naked~

Doppo having a crush on his cheerful neighbor~

When his fem s/o is self-conscious of being 'masculine'~

Doppo - 73. “How did they…how are they doing that?”(slight NSFW)

HifumixDoppo - Hogwarts!AU - 25. “We should totally NOT do that!”

Doppo - 75. “Let me help you relax”(NSFW)

Doppo in a secret relationship with his colleague(NSFW)

$Bad Ass Temple$

When their s/o sleeps in their jacket~~

Kuko Harai

When they have a cute, small s/o~

When his s/o plays video games for hours~

Jyushi Aimono

Jyushi with a strong s/o~

Jyushi x Amanda headcanons~

Jyushi - 62. “I am not a bottom!””(NSFW)

Hitoya Amaguni

Hitoya - 11. “I think I picked up your coffee by mistake.”~

Hitoya wanting to take his s/o for a motorcycle ride but they have anxiety~

•Dotsuitare Honpo•

Sasara Nurude:

How he takes care of you when you're sick~

Sasara - 23. “This is by far the stupidest plan you’ve ever had. Of course I’m in.”

Sasara - 18. “Wait a second, are you jealous?”

Sasara trying to make his crush laugh~

When their s/o is an idol~

Sasara falling for his rival~

When his fem s/o is self-conscious of being 'masculine'~

Sasara and his s/o having a relaxing night~

Sasara - 11. “I could never forget someone like you”

Rosho Tsutsujimori

Helping Rosho with his stage fright~

When he's your high school sweetheart~

Rei Amayado

None yet~

{Chuuoku}

Otome Tohoten

None yet~

Ichijiku Kadenokoji

When you confess to her~

Nemu Aohitsugi

Nemu - 8. “For some reason I’m attracted to you.”

^Other^

Which snacks the boys would like~

Misc:

- 500 Followers Celebration Prompts~

- NSFW Alphabet~

- Shipping Game~

- Three Sentence Fics~

[modesty-blaise]

Since I'm curious, what caused you to become very possessive of your gifs? Not out of rudeness but curious, since no matter what you do a lot of them show up in the gif function on Tumblr which automatically credits you at the bottom of the gif.

Hey. Tbh, at first I didn’t wanna bother with yet another anon but since I see no ill intent behind this, I decided to go and answer it. Unfortunately, half-way through I realised my reply is turning into incredibly long semi-bitter rant and expands well beyond calling out just one person in Psychonauts fandom (and yes, this is related to Psychonauts fandom – you do know that these anons are not really that anonymous, right?) so… buckle up! All that beneath “read more”.

I’ve been on this hellsite for like…7-8 years? Maybe more? Can’t really tell cause I moved blogs and my old blog now consists of only 4 posts I’ve made close to leaving so I honestly have no idea how much time I’ve spend here before moving. Anyway, during those few years I’ve spent on my first blog I’ve met a lot of creative gifmakers who enjoyed sharing their love for fandoms they were in. I’d like to point out that this was waaaaay before tumblr created that insert-gif option so, back in the day, the only way to add gifs to your post was to: 1. make them yourself 2. take them from someone else. And a lot of people were taking them from someone else which resulted in many gifmakers giving up on making gifs and leaving fandoms and/or even leaving tumblr – and I’ve had many of my friends give up on what they love and have their games/shows/movies/whatnot ruined for them cause people would not stop stealing from them. And many of my friends eventually left tumblr cause they couldn’t deal with it anymore.

Tumblr adding insert-gif option, in my opinion, honestly, just made it worse for gifmakers. Cause now people had the opportunity to use gifs for their posts, with or without creators’ permission/knowledge, but it was alright and it was perfectly fine cause creators were credited. There’s their name at the bottom. It’s alright. Like… it doesn’t matter if they’re actually okay with people using something they’ve put hours into making or if they’re not – tumblr gives them credit so they SHOULD be okay with it. Simple as that.

Well, we’re all different and some people are not okay with that. I’m not okay with that. It took me weeks to figure out how to use photoshop correctly. Took me countless hours of looking through different tutorials and basically trial-and-error-ing my way through the process. Whenever I make gifs, it takes me hours to record videos and then hours trying to achieve that 3mb limit on gifs (thank lord these days we’re beyond 1mb limit). After all that effort I put into creating gifs for games that I love and enjoy, someone is going to make 2 clicks and have that same gif added to their post, without even asking. So how is that okay?

Back to your question. Yes, “no matter what you do a lot of them show up in the gif function on Tumblr”, that is true and that is something I was aware of when I saw you-know-who announcing they would be starting 30 days Psychonauts challenge. So, hating to see my gifs used against my will, and not wanting to start any unnecessary drama and threaten people in advance with reporting them if they do use them, I’ve made my blog as private as I could. It was only accessible through the dashboard, it was not showing in ANY search engines inside and outside tumblr, and my gifs were impossible to find through insert-gif function – I’ve made sure. I did all that cause I just knew that during those 30 days, someone would use my gifs and I would get mad and I desperately wanted to avoid that (hence going extreme). And you know what happened? You know what creator of this challenge (who prevously already reposted my gifs) did? *drums* They used my shit anyway. :3 They just uploaded it from their computer, where they’ve saved it earlier.

And like… a lot of people see pretty pic and decide to save it - I mean, we all do that. Heck, even I have a folder full of shit I saw online and liked it – but i’m not uploading it online cause I haven’t made it. It’s not mine to share.

But some people are not like that.

Some people see fanart of something they like and they want to share their opinion on it – and instead of making their own post, maybe drawing the fanart themselves, they decide to use someone else’s art for their post. Do they know who made it? Do they have creator’s permission to share it? If the answer is NO, then they should be a decent human being and not do that to creators. Oh, they shared it anyway but now people in fandom are calling them out BUT this actually happened on accident? They know who the creator is but, somehow, they accidentally forgot to credit them? OK, well, it’s possible, shit happens, but they better make sure it doesn’t happen again.

Then sometime later these same people decide they want to make a post appreciating their fav character and they want to include pics cause duh, you can’t have character appreciation post without pics, right? Now they have several options: they can get their own screenshots, make their own gifs, maybe draw something… or they can just take someone else’s creation. Do they know who made it? Well there’s my fuckin name on it, and since they’ve stretched it from 245 to 500px, it’s really hard to miss, plus it’s not like there are that many people making Psychonauts gifs. Do they have permission to share it? Hmmm, nope, didn’t ask me. Is this also an accident? Could be. I mean, I’ve seen stranger things happen, so accidentally forgetting to credit content creators twice… kinda suspicious but still possible. Who am I to say?

Now if these people then decide to make a post appreciating their fav ship and they want to add a cute pic of the loving couple – yup, you guessed it! They can either create something or take something. Again: they know who did? They asked for permission? Got the permission? No?!?! But they posted it anyway?!?! :o Could it really be, that after being called out publicly, after being told that reposting is bad (something that’s very easy to understand), after even having tumblr staff intervene and remove stolen shit from their blog, after all that - could it really still be an accident?

Nah, man.

They just don’t give a shit.

Cause if they did, they’d stop with that crap first time they were called out.

(and if you think Psychonauts fandom is their only fandom and that they’re not doing this crap in other fandoms too - hoooo, boy, do I have some bad news for you! Do you know how many stolen and butchered HP fanart is on their blog? Hobbit stuff? They seem to be one of the most accident-prone users on tumblr. And honestly - it’s a real miracle their blog’s not been terminated.)

Back to what I was talking about - I’m not okay with people using my gifs and I’ve made it very clear. I literally do not give a shit if I’m credited or not, I’ve made it very clear that I don’t want my gifs used without my permission. If you like them and want them on your blog, there’s a fuckin reblog button. It’s sole purpose is to allow you to share other people’s creations. Or shitposts, cause lord knows we all love those.

So that’s why when someone spends hours going through my Psychonauts tag and goes as far as to send me “I love your gifs” anonymous message, but the very next day makes stim moodboard post including one of my gifs, now cut and resized to fit 3x3 format they’re going with, I get mad. And that’s why when someone uses one of my gifs to promote their RP blog, butchering it to fit their aesthetics, and later when confronted going as far as blaming their good friend on it cause god! they’ve had no idea it wasn’t theirs, I get mad. (makes you wonder though: if they friend has such skills, why not making them gifs themselves?)

Like…. I’ve had my gifs stolen plenty of times. I’ve had them stolen for roleplaying, for headers, for imagines, just for notes… I’ve had them stolen by people claiming to run official fan sites (that’s a real wild story but I won’t get into that now)… I’ve seen them on pinterest, weheartit, FB, all those random gif sites… and I’ve seen EVERY. POSSIBLE. EXCUSE. ranging from: “well i found it on google so why should i credit you” “lol dunno who made this but its pretty so im posting it” “ive had it on my computer for years so i don’t remember where i got it from” “i dont know how to make gifs so im using weheartit as a source” “credit to whoever made this” (that’s my fav) to “its just a gif so who gives a shit” (it’s not – it’s hours of creator’s time and lots of love that you’re now shitting on so thanks) and “i have an /illness/ and getting notes makes me feel better so dont u dare blame me for stealing” (I don’t remember exact excuse but it was something along those lines and like… how do you even respond to something that without looking like an asshole?).

And sometimes it really is just an accident. Sometimes people really do forget to credit you and/or ask you for permission. And I’ve had my fair share of those accidents. People in Psychonauts fandom have been using my gifs for various crap but, when approached, they’ve removed it and apologised. And it’s something I really appreciate. (if they actually bother reading this and they recognise themselves: i’m really grateful and thank you for not being an ass)

But you know what I don’t appreciate? People making a call out posts about me, asking about my gifs when they know very well they’re the main reasons why I’m not making those gifs anymore, at the same time failing to address any of the issues I have with them and instead rather explaining to others what happened BUT explaining only the parts that make me look like a villain cause how I even dare be mad about them stealing? How I even dare call them out on it? That is so ridiculous and criminal of me, and it’s so so sooooo bad that they need to call me out. I deserve to be called out by the very same person who’s been stealing my shit.

And their explanation is…well… it’s something.

They were sympathetic and polite? When did this happen? Did I completely missed that part? Please someone fuckin enlighten me with such post/message where they expressed their sympathy and politeness and I’ll apologise right this second.

I told them to “literally fuck off”? Yeah, that did happen, I admit that. Did they bother explaining why I told them to fuck off in the first place? Did they say they were caught stealing from me and had tumblr stuff remove my shit from their blog? Did they get into details of how they demanded the proof of my so very wild and obviously false claims but then when I showed it, they just deleted that “how dare u call me out cause I would never do such thing” post? No, they didn’t and geee, I really wonder why.

Instead, what did they choose to address? Out of all the things I’ve said. Hm? What did they choose? Me telling them to fuck off. Me dropping the F-bomb on them, rudely rejecting their obvious kindness and politeness. Nothing else.

Back to what I was talking about before I got derailed again: no, I’m not mad cause this person used my gifs without crediting me. I mean – I am, but that’s not my main issue with them (and they know it). My main issue is that this is someone who will continuously lie and steal and still deny any of it, even when there’s plenty of proof (and you can always count on me to show up with proof tbh), and then go as far as to publicly ask about my gifs and try to call me out. Like me getting mad that something I’ve put hours of work into, and something I’ve made cause I love the game and I want to share my love and appreciation for it, is now being shared against my will and my knowledge - like me getting mad over something like that is so unreasonable that they need to make an entire post about it while pretending they have absolutely no idea why I’m even mad and why we have issues.

And I have every fucking right to be mad. 3 times is not an accident. 2 times to the same person is not an accident. They know it. But yeah, playing stupid is their defense so it’s not like I expected them to actually address their actions this time either.

And you know what? Just because I swear a lot doesn’t mean I’m wrong. Doesn’t mean there’s no solid ground for my claims. People on tumblr have always been and always will be stealing shit. Sometimes they will credit you, often they will not, and that’s just how it is, doesn’t matter if you’re okay with it or not. But that doesn’t mean I’m just gonna sit quiet and accept someone’s shitty behaviour. Especially when it’s directed at me.

TLDR: giving credit =/= having permission

but my previous posts leading to this ask were not about that

you knew that already

[typicalmidnight]

iron man 2 running commentary

okay so watching iron man 2 for the first time and i have a feeling im gonna have lots of commentary to share so it will all be under the cut! i’m gonna keep updating it as i watch!

*starts watching iron man 2 without watching iron man first cause it’s not on netflix and is only 2 minutes in but completely confused*

*questions my intelligence because i was able to understand the other marvel movies without watching other ones first*

*wonders if somehow i haven’t seen enough tony stark on tumblr to understand but i’ve somehow seen enough of other things to understand other movies*

*cue suprised and upset anon* sorry anon!!

okay anon!! help me pls! is the guy in the very beginning of iron man 2 someone from the first movie, and if he is who is he?? or is he new in this movie? edit: nevermind i looked it up

omg the first scene we see iron man is so cooool i love it!

holy sh*t he just landed on a stage omggg *freaks out so much because WOW*

im not even 7 minutes in yet but WOW IM SHOOK

i litterally just watched that first scene of tony/iron man in awe the whole time

“the possibility of world peace” BAAAAAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHAAAAAA there’s a whole lot in store for the world, and i can guarantee it wont be peaceful lol

the stark expo is year long?!?!!?!!??? wow....

oooh oooh oooh that’s happy!

tony with kids awww

OMG THATS PETER PARKER RIGHT

STAN LEEEE OMG AWWWW

wait what did tony do??

AHHHHH pepper!!

does tony like pepper yet?? are they dating??

god tony. his sense of humor omg.

pepper isnt impressed lol

tony is so savage we stan a queen lol

you’re right, it isn’t canada cause we’re AWESOME and dont have ppl trying to get rid of iron man

rhodey!! i know who that is!

litterally everything tony says is amazing

oooooh whats tony up to?...

world peace? dream on tony

did he just say f**k you to tony stark? UM NO YOU DID NOT

oof the scenes with this bad dude are boring

wait i take that back HE JUST CUT A TV IN HALF!!

“wake up, daddy’s home” god i love tony

i think im getting too excited about everything lolll

tony insulting that robot arm thing gives me life

whats that thing in tony’s chest?? im guessing it has something to do with him being iron man and was part of the first movie

im confused about the relationship between pepper and tony

oooh shes ceo congrats to her!!

is this actually good tho?? the look on her face isnt great

oh okay its good she was just suprised

are those like fake documents or something?

OMG ITS NATASHA!!! AHHHHHHHH I LOVE HER SO MUCH SHE’S LIKE MY FAVE MCU WOMAN OTHER THAN MJ

i got way too excited there and hit my wrist on my wall and now it hurts

wait he doesn’t know nat yet??? HOW?!

also ummm natalie rushman?? that name kinda suits her?? ish idk

NATASHA IS A QUEEEEEEN!!!! I STANNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i also got so excited about nat that my eyes started to water

“i want one” okay tony nat could knock you out in a second and she for sure doesn’t need a man! also PEPPER!!!!!! LIKE WHAT ABOUT HER!

its the grand prix! it looks just like it does in cars 2!! lollll i was super shooketh about that when i made the connection

OMG ITS NAT AGAIN YAY!

WAIT is tony gonna drive that race car??? is he gonna race??? OMG i hope he does

also my wrist still hurts

wait pepper is suprised?? tony you didnt tell pepper? TONY YOU DIDNT TELL PEPPER??? TONY COME ONNNNNN

OMG TONY WHY PEPPER IS CONCERNED NOW

also is nat working for tony or something

oof its 12 am i should sleep i have school tmrw

haha bish that reporter lady left cause ur boring and nobody cares about you

AHHHH TONY’S GONNA RACEEEE

omg tony is racing tony is racing TONY IS RACING TONY IS RACING!!!! TONY PLS DONT DIE OR SOMETHING

hello my name is leea and i’m a huge drama queen that loves and cares so much about tony stark

OMG ITS THE VILLAIN GUY ACKKK TONY IS GONNA DIE

im still super dramatic lol

and also 100% convinced tony is gonna die even tho i know that wont happen

IM GETTING SO MUCH ANXIETY FROM JUST WATCHING THIS AHHHH

THE VILLAN GUY IS GOING SOMEWHERE ONTO THE TRACK OR SOMETHING ACKKKK

i hit my elbow and my head (not too hard dont worry) and the elbow is the same arm that i hurt my wrist so now my arm hurts from my elbow to my hand

WHAT IS THAT GUY DOING HE JUST WALKED ONTO THE RACE CAR TRACK

i litterally pressed play and then pressed pause two seconds later ooooof

peppers face omg she is shooketh lol

WTF IS HE DOING??!!!!!! also wth is he wearing on his chest?

OOOOOOOOOMG he has his slicy electricity weapon thingies TONY IS GONNA DIE AHHHH

HE JUST HIT A CAR OMG I HOPE THE PERSON IS OKAY

^big example of me being a drama queen and innocent and sweet at the same time

HAPPY HAS WHAT IM ASSUMING TO BE IRON MAN SOMETHING

TONY IS ABOUT TO DIE!!!

i paused it right before he hits the car omg the suspense!!!!!

ANXIETY LEVELS RIGHT NOW

OMG TONY NOOOOOOOO

IM BREATHING SO DEEP AND FAST RIGHT NOW IM PANICKING FOR TONY (it’s called hyperventalating. future me remembered the word lol)

dude WHYYY would you take off your helmet??!!!!

there is a dude coming to kill you and i think a helmet would help protect you idiot!!

OMG THERES A CAR COMING AT THE VILLAIN GUY

WHAT IF IT HITS HIM AND THEN HITS TONY

THEY JUST EXPLODED OMG

i just choked because i was like WHAT JUST HAPPENED

there are cars exploding behind him and this dude just doesnt care!!

why have i started saying dude?

owww my wrist hurts

typing hurts

owwww

its actually really not that bad im dramatic

is pepper gonna save tony????

does the case have the rescue armor ive read about?????

HE JUST TRIED TO KILL TONY

*facepalms* tony WHY did you just hit him on the head with whatever that was??? what did you think it would accomplish??????? this dude just sliced your car in half and tried to kill you, do you think you can take him out by hitting him on the head??? just get tf out of there!!!

OMG HES GONNA KILL TONY

i just hit my head again (not hard it fine)

OMG DID HE JUST HIT TONY

I THINK HE JUST HIT TONY

IM NOT OKAY

AND I DONT THINK HE IS EITHER

AHHHHHHHHHHH

okay i’m going to bed cause its almost 1 am and i have school. anyway, this is the 100th comment which is kinda good to leave off at! i’ll finish watching tmrw and keep posting!

okay i’m back! about to start watching the movie!

ahhhhhh poor tony!!! i’m only a few seconds in but already panicking for him!!

omg hes getting ready to kill tony!! and tony is just lying on the ground!!!

pepper and happy come save him! ! ! ! ! !!!!!!!

or nat!!!!

ahhhhhhhhh tonys gonna die!!!!!!!!!!!!!

with every second i freak out moreeeee

oh thank GOD tony moved!!!

that car just exploded omg tony almost diedddd!!!

AHHHHH TONY IS ON FIRE

how tf is he so calm!!!!????!?!?!?!?!?

i mean hes not that calm but way calmer than any normal human should be in this situation

is he just like used to people trying to kill him??

OMG thats soo saaaaaaaddddd

OKAY HERE COMES PEPPER AND HAPPY

please run over him!!!

OMG THEY ALMOST HIT TONY

but they hit the bad guy yay!!!

awww tony is bleeding!

well i mean thats kinda expected lol

oof tony is mad

OMG PEPPER IS SO PISSED

shes acting like a mom lol

OMG THE GUYS WEAPONS ARE POWERING ON

THEY’RE ALL GONNA DIE

TONY JUST GET IN THE CAR

OMG THE DOOR

TONY GET IN THE CAR AND HAPPY GET TF OUT OF THERE!!!!

tony just GET IN THE CAR

OMG THE AIR BAG

HE JUST CUT THE WINDOW

THIS SCENE IS SO INTENSE OMG

okay pepper i love you but JUST GIVE TONY THE CASE

tony your armor is taking WAY TOO LONG to get on!!!

AHHHHH LOOK AT THE ARMOR!!!!!

ITS SO OLD

like not old

but compared to his current suit

the “it’s nanotech. you like it?” one

its nothing

AHHH HE HIT TONYS ARM

AHHHH TONYS GONNA DIE

AHHHH PEPPER IS SCREAMING

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

#drama queen much? #yes thats me

AHHH COME ON TONY

love how i’ve only gotten 3 more minutes into the movie and i’m already at 47 comments

OMG HE JUST WHIPPED TONY TO THE GROUND

omg poor tony!!!!

can everyone just leave my dad alone PLEASE

YAY TONY!! NOW THE BAD GUY IS ON THE GROUND!!!

oh thank god tony is okay hes not dead he won for now

eww he just spat out a bunch of blood

“you loose” how??? like what???

ooooooooooh wait no is tony gonna get in trouble.......

i forgot to say this yesterday but this whole scene with the guy on the track and stuff and the exploding cars in kinda similar to cars 2

i guess you cant have a racing scene in a movie without a car exploding tho

what is up with that guy with glasses?? like hes weird i dont trust him

why arent there subtitles translating whatever language they are speaking in (french? idk)

ya its french

ofc tony talks about the technology lol

and critcizes the bad guy’s

tony this guy tried to kill you WHY are you sitting down next to him??!!?

that guy is weird and kinda creepy

okay just f off senator dude nobody likes you, your opinion isnt valid, and i wanna punch you

“these suits exist now”????? wtf b*tch no they dont!

wait what ever happened to nat??

pepper is really responsible shes great i love her

what does that note say???

omg is that a bomb or something??!

why do guards always help prisoners escape like seriously

is that guy gonna take his place or something??

also he kinda looks like haymitch from hunger games

omg wait WTF WAS THAT

ALSO GUARD WHAT THE HELL

i was right! it was a bomb!

why did they throw him in a truck??

omg why are they in an airport?!

are they gonna help him escape??!!

why is there a table and people....

is that glasses guy sitting at the table?

i was right it is glasses guy!

i didn’t trust him from the start

why is he helping him tho...

friend? fan? what is going on?!!!???

YAYYYYY theres nat!!!

“erratic behaviour”??? what are you talking about???? he just saved himself from being killed how is that erratic?????!!

awwww poor tony

i beleive in you tony, and i love you, but no honey, you don’t know exactly what you’re doing you need help!

“software sh*t” aaaaaaaaaaahahahahhaahhaaaaa

make iron man look like an antique? ya no way is that gonna happen

is nat his assistant or something im a bit confused

aww tony is like so depressed i feel so bad for him!!

stannnnn nat

back on watch? what does that mean...

omg tony is so drunkkkkkk nooooo

ohhhhh tonyyyyy noooo come onnnn

you’re so drunk dude stopppp

god tony you’re so drunk pleaseee

wait why is rhodey fighting him anyway?

wow this is my 101 comment today and i’ve only watched 20 mins today

omggggg people are recordingggg this isn’t gonna end well

*sighs* oh god tony dont yell at them whyyyyy

omg tonys in the fire place!!!

omg that just happened. they just fired at each other.

also just saying tony, he does have what it takes to be war machine cause he continues to be...

ohhhh is tony okay??

im confused tho why did they start fighting in the first place?

okay i just looked it up, it was because he was being irresponsible and drunk, and putting people at the party in danger, and he wouldnt stop

ngl its getting kinda tiring to keep updating this but i’m gonna keep going cause i want this record for myself, and i’m not gonna quit something

ok i’m gonna continue the movie tmrw cause its prob gonna be a snow day (lol i left off at 111)

[comicteaparty]

December 27th, 2018 CTP Archive

The archive for the Comic Tea Party chat that occurred on December 27th, 2018, from 5PM - 7PM PST.  The chat focused on Inhibit by Eve Greenwood / evegwood.

Featured Comment:

Chat:

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- THURSDAY BOOK CLUB START!

Good evening, everyone~! This week’s Thursday Book Club is officially beginning! Today we are discussing Inhibit by Eve Greenwood / evegwood~! (http://www.inhibitcomic.com/)

Remember that Thursday discussions are completely freeform! However, every 30 minutes I will drop in OPTIONAL discussion questions in case you’d like a bit of a prompt. If you miss out on one of these prompts, you can find them pinned for the chat’s duration. Additionally, remember that while constructive criticism is allowed, our focus is fun and respectfully appreciating the comic. All that said, let’s begin!

QUESTION 1. What is your favorite scene in the comic so far and why?

there are many great scenes, but i am particularly fond of victor in the parking garage. specifically, i enjoy the unfolding of events once masha joins the party. i love the fact that victor freezes up and just flat out doesnt know what to do. not only does this fit with his character, but i actually think its refreshing for a protagonist with powers to still just be a regular person deep down who does not have the required training to deal with that sort of situation. not to mention i love seeing paulina's powers in action

spire

Agreed! The garage is one of my favorites too. I love how Paulina is breaking rules left and right- not just laws (lol) but all the concepts that have been established so far about how powers are supposed to work. I really want to figure out what's going on(edited)

RebelVampire

or is she breaking laws? as in the powers. obviously shes breaking the other sorts of laws like dont set ppls property on fire. but i will save theories on the powers for a bit later. i do enjoy that she throws a wrench already into what's established. tho i felt bad for victor that nobody is listening to him.

another scene ive been enjoying is the current flashback where victor is a bouncy child. mostly because i love how excited about everything victor is. like wanting explosions just cause its cool. and i think its just this real contrast that builds tension for the narrative since youre like "victor man what happened O_O"

spire

No one listened to him then and no one listens to him now. I would love it if someone took him seriously for once

I would also love it it someone let him REST

RebelVampire

yeah my heart really hurts for him. because ive been in that position of sitting there constantly trying to tell someone something and then being ignored.

although i really think ppl need to learn moderation in regards to their expectations for victor most of all

cause it seems like ppl either 1) expect nothing from victor and think hes a loser or 2) pull a nate and expect victor to auto be this extremely capable person despite not having trained for anything in years

Superjustinbros

*jumps in

Hello~!

RebelVampire

hey super!

Superjustinbros

Hey Rebel!

Pleased to be here~

spire

Hello~

Superjustinbros

And hello to you too, Spire!

RebelVampire

another scene that i enjoy was when julia, david, and victor snuck back in to the building to eavesdrop. on a technical level i liked the writing for it because it was a scene that moved the plot along but also served to show off the relationship dynamics that exist between those specific characters. so as a narrative construct everything in that scene felt like it had purpose to one end or the other.

Superjustinbros

I just want to say, the faces in this comic are incredible.

http://www.inhibitcomic.com/comics/2658763/chapter-5-pg-11/ Especially this one on the bottom right

And then they play bloody Laser Tag

RebelVampire

yeah the faces on the kid are really some fantastic exaggerations

Superjustinbros

Oh yes

RebelVampire

but suits them cause theyre kids

Superjustinbros

There's lots of fun to be had with giving characters over the top faces.

RebelVampire

QUESTION 2. Victor has been shown to be a drastically different person than he was in his youth. What is the past incident that several characters bring up that apparently resulted in a trial and inevitably got Victor kicked out of Urquhart? What does it have to do with Masha, and do you think Julia was involved somehow considering she’s also at Earl Estate? Is it the reason Nate and Victor’s relationship soured as well? Do you believe the incident is what changed Victor so much, or is it several aspects of his life? Do you think any of this has something to do with why Victor has failed to improve at Earl Estate? Also, why do you believe Victor’s inhibitors are now failing him so badly? Lastly, do you believe his missions with Nate will have an effect on Victor’s personality? How so?

Superjustinbros

tfw it's already time to answer question 2

I'll stop posting these to the chat now

RebelVampire

well considering adult victor has some issue controlling his powers when hes emotional, im gonna assume something of that nature happened. potentially maybe to that bully who keeps picking on young masha. cause i feel like victor is gonna stand up to them or attempt to and get mad and then accidentally severely injure them or something. idk about julia being involved

tho looking back it looks like she has all her fingers as a child

Superjustinbros

That seems like a very good interpretation.

Considering he does shoot out electricity at impractical times, at least from what I've seen(edited)

RebelVampire

as for nate and victor's relationship souring, i think theres more at work than just this incident. i kind of get the impression that nate just kind of likes taking things out on victor even when everything has nothing to do with victor. but i think basically all this crap combined to shake victor's confidence and that's a large reason hes not improving. cause he just has no reason to be confident anymore.

spire

I think Vic's self worth has been raised into a precarious position thanks to being a gifted (in this case- super powered) child, and with how much his spark-outs are emphasized through the whole comic, something terrible must have happened with a spark and that lack of control was touted against him, which makes it near impossible to repair his self esteem

RebelVampire

yes definitely all that. cause i feel by and large that victor has just given up on himself. which tbf i dont blame him cause literally nobody is doing anything to help really. like theres not a truly positive influence. although to nate's credit i guess he's trying? just ya know, in a super bad way

spire

Lol yeah. That's a good way to put it

Nate is helping but in the worst way. Vic needs some genuine, earnest support

As for Julia, I suspect she gave herself frostbite? Noor is very strict about Julia forming ice around her limbs, and she must have been moved to Earl for a similar outburst of her own powers

RebelVampire

tbh i think julia has more control of her powers. from the impression i get anyway. i kind of think julia is just reckless and doesnt think her actions through. though i mean might of been an outburst too. i could really go either way. and maybe its both.

though frostbite is way more tame than what i was thinking happened XD

i was picturing more encasing an ice and then shattering said ice

frostbite sounds more reasonable and less horrific

spire

Omg

Julia just thought one day that it would be cool to be a snowman

She didn't consider the fact that she can't move. Once she becomes the snow man ️

RebelVampire

that sounds like something shed do. even now cause i dont feel shes anymore responsible than she was as a kid

which ya know narratively speaking is kind of a good contrast with victor in a way

spire

Yeah

RebelVampire

cause victor has no control of his powers but has a sort of reserved control of himself. whereas julia has control of her powers but is an explosion of bad decisions waiting to happen

spire

I love that about them. Despite Julia's recklessness I think it's good for Vic to not be sitting alone in his room 24/7

RebelVampire

idk i agree and disagree. its good for him to get out and socialize, but im not sure the ppl around him are well-suited to kind of give him teh space he needs.

tho tbf im not sure the estate is the healithiest place in general

it kind of feels like prison

QUESTION 3. Victor’s life changes a lot when he’s forced to join Nate’s team. Why do you think Nate is so vehement about having Victor as a temporary member on his team? Is he honestly just trying to help Victor, or is there is some other hidden reason? What did you think the way the retrievals were handled says about the world and its view on Variants? How might the first mission change Victor’s perspective on Variants and how they’re treated (if at all)? How will it affect how Victor deals with other team missions and/or the course of the story? Lastly, do you believe that Victor will be able to makes amends and bond with the team, or will he continue to be chastised and treated somewhat lesser?

spire

The way that variants are trained at places like Urq and Miller to almost solely police their own community is disturbing. Vic wants no part of it and it's perfectly understandable

Variants are monitored so closely through their whole lives. it's invasive.

RebelVampire

yeah. and i mean...theres a degree i want to be understanding. i would not want untrained variants just walking around causing accidents and such. cause theyve shown that their powers can be damaging not just to others but themselves and also all the property around them. so i can understand that variants kind of need a special thing going on for everyone's protection

but man do those places feel like prison

like when you cant even let someone's mom see their kid off

thats a bad sign

spire

In that kind of environment a variant is pressured to do whatever they can to appear trustworthy. Even if Nate is trying to help Vic out I think he's ultimately trying to make himself look better by helping Vic succeed

RebelVampire

that could be although i feel theres easier ways then making under the table secret deals. tho tbh i think theres a mix going on here. like i think nate does want to help victor and wants to see him succeed. but i also feel like nate isnt altruistic either. more like he wants to help victor cause he feels like victor is his one failure that he cant leave to continue to be a failure just for the sake of his own pride.

Superjustinbros

“I think he's ultimately trying to make himself look better by helping Vic succeed”

This thought caught my eyes

RebelVampire

although it could also be that nate sees something of himself reflected in victor. cause nate did freak out when masha wasnt just flat out listening to his captain's orders. and i kind of feel that reflects his own feelings of being unsure of himself

Superjustinbros

Perhaps

RebelVampire

but i kind of wonder if theres an issue of dormancy at play in all this? cause if nate feels like he's losing his powers and position soon, that could be a prime motivator in whatever he feels hes got to do

like hes running out of his chance to do that one super awesome thing that immortalizes him in history

spire

Ooooooooo that's a very interesting thought

Reminiscent of thinkin you need to be ultra successful by the time you're 30

I hadn't thought of nates motivation that way before :0

RebelVampire

yeah and this is kind of an extreme case of needing to be successful by 30. cause in this case its kind of true in a way. since im sure if youre a variant the powers are kind of part of who you are. but by 30 you lose that and essentially have to redefine who you are as a person. and i think thats more true with the way their system is set up since their glorified prisons are so life encompassing.

spire

Yeah. That's got to be terrifying, knowing your whole identity is going to disappear one day, one day SOON

RebelVampire

yes. or so were led to believe. cause tbf i got sinister vibes from that scene with the doctor checking young victor for dormancy. so maybe all we know is a lie and dormancy is not a natural process but something forced upon variants.

spire

OOOOOOOOHH

Terrifying if tru

Superjustinbros

Yeah that scene creeped me out a bit

and it just came out of nowhere

RebelVampire

cause i agree with young victor. why are you checking a kid for dormancy if you know the typical ages for dormancy

and i feel that line is there for a reason

spire

I wonder if he's still wondering that now, 9 years later?

And I hope he is

RebelVampire

maybe hell remember it

Superjustinbros

Exactly, Rebel. (about the dormacy part)(edited)

RebelVampire

cause to tie in the 2nd part of that question, i def think victor is on the path to see the injustice in how variants are treated

those facial expressions in the van were already on the extreme i feel sorry for these people side

QUESTION 4. Inadvertently, Victor becomes involved with a dangerous arsonist named Paulina. What do you think Paulina’s powers are? Is she a pyro as many believe, or is there something funky going on with her powers like Victor believes? Why do you believe Paulina attacked Miller, and why do you think she’s so desperately looking for Chalice? Where do you think Paulina even came from given she isn’t declaring any facility as her origin? Why, of all people, do you think Paulina went to Victor specifically for help? Given Victor gets Julia involved, how might the residents of Earl Estate affect Victor helping Paulina or not? In general, do you believe Victor will help Paulina or not, and how will this choice affect the rest of the story?

Superjustinbros

I'm going to say maybe she has multiple powers versus most of the other characters that only have one

spire

That's what I was thinking too

Superjustinbros

I mean she really is mysterious, since her profile is still //||?⁄⁄/⁄\ | on the site

RebelVampire

idk. i mean its certainly possible. but im also willing to think that she has one power that doesnt fit any of the predefined powers the world established. so like shes a new variant type. or that she knows how to use her pyro powers in a way that nobody thought possible

but multiple powers is still possible

im just more willing to error on the side of it still fitting in with established laws and we just dont get the full picture yet

Superjustinbros

maybe like dark/gravity powers, or some power that's otherwise considered taboo?

spire

I think ultimately Vic's going to be looking for some truth and working with Pauli will appear? To get him some answers

Superjustinbros

Considering het background is nothing like the others

And yeah, maybe that ends up happening

http://inhibit.smackjeeves.com/files/what.png I mean can anyone translate this(edited)

RebelVampire

no but its probably just for the purposes of making her mysterious

and wont change to not give new readers spoilers XD

spire

Yes I believe that's simply to keep it mysterious for new readers

Superjustinbros

Yeah

RebelVampire

i think victor will def help paulina, although im not sure i get the impression paulina is gonna inspire victor to look for truth persay. though if she gets him to chalice, i think chalice will make him question stuff.

Superjustinbros

Maybe, just maybe.(edited)

RebelVampire

i kind of get the impression that paulina didnt come from any facility but instead has been living and training outside the system. cause we dont really know the process by which the facilities collect variants in the first place. like obviously we see victor's mom bring victor. but like...was it the law? was it under threat hed be taken anyway? how did ppl know?(edited)

and without knowing these things i can think of a lot of reasons paulina just skirted by the system

Superjustinbros

Definitely could be something outside the system, since it's still a mystery

spire

I'm wondering if the only reason Pauli chased Vic down to Earl is because she has blackmail to make him help her find chalice. If she asked anyone else she's obvs get turned in to the police or taken home?? Wherever that is???

Well, I guess it's not really black mail. So I don't really know

RebelVampire

maybe paulina just picked him cause hes the only variant she knows now who didnt immediately try to arrest her

and tbf

victor is a good choice cause he would seem easy to intimidate into doing what you want him to do

spire

TRUE LMAO

RebelVampire

tho i couldnt fathom why she wants to find chalice. i mean the assumption is she wants their help. but maybe she super hates them and chalice is corrupt and bad. and that there is no good in this world. or something depressing like that.

Superjustinbros

lmao

Plus he's the protagonist

RebelVampire

paulina got super meta and said "hey victor you feel like a protagonist. you can probably help"

XD

Superjustinbros

XD

Protagonist Syndrome in a nutshell

RebelVampire

that makes me feel bad for victor. victor seems like the last person whod ever want to be a protagonist

just wants to sleep in his room instead

spire

Hashtag relatable tbh

Superjustinbros

Yes

RebelVampire

since we only have 4 mins left, are there any final thoughts to share?

Superjustinbros

I'd love to do the same lol

I want to say this has been a great read so far, it's got great characters, lots of emotion, and lots of charm.

(And lots of good expressions)

Good luck with the comic, Eve, it's really going strongly so far.

spire

I think inhibit really nails what it feels like to be pinned by the expectations put on you by all levels of society, but still allowing itself to breathe and be funny and so human

RebelVampire

i think inhibit is a great story with memorable personalities. but most of all it has a relateable protagonist whose inner demons can speak to most ppl, and watching his journey is definitely probably something that will inspire hope

unless victor dies

then no hope

COMIC TEA PARTY- THURSDAY BOOK CLUB END!

Sadly, this wraps up this week’s Thursday Book Club chat for now. Thank you so much to everyone for reading and joining us! We want to give a special thank you to Eve Greenwood / evegwood, as well, for making Inhibit. If you liked the comic, make sure to support Eve Greenwood / evegwood’s efforts however you’re able to~!

Read and Comment: http://www.inhibitcomic.com/

Eve Greenwood / evegwood’s Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/evegwood

Eve Greenwood / evegwood’s Ko-Fi: https://ko-fi.com/evegwood

Eve Greenwood / evegwood’s Paypal Donation Link: https://www.paypal.me/evegwood

Eve Greenwood / evegwood’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/evegwood

Comic Tea Party- Thursday Book Club

Next week’s Thursday Book Club will be about Princess Pups by Lindsay Hornsby. For participants, you have the next week to read as much of the comic as you would like~! We hope to see you on Thursday, January 3rd, from 5PM to 7PM PST for the chat in #thursday_bookclub!

Comic’s Main Site: https://tapas.io/series/Princess-Pups