#yes ik 'she moved away' shut up and let your only black woman be a main character do not get lazy and toss her out when you can't think of

[rainbow-crane]

so my sister is getting me to watch Cobra Kai while I'm visiting home, right

and look. She warned me about the love square. The old man rivalry. All that good stuff. What she did not warn me of, or rather, was not equipped to warn me of(she's never played DR), was the fact that Mondo Owada is a main fucking character

[yelenasdog]

winter’s delights (the winter soldier x fem. hydra agent!reader) ch. 1/?

words: 1,384 (yes ik it’s short don’t bully me it’ll make sense later LMFAO)

warnings: death in future chapters, choking, blood, bruises, mentions of men being disrespectful to girls, r*pe implications in future chapters, smut in future chapters, and the obvious foul langauge lmfao. 

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 Experiment Day 1

The Soldier

click clack, click clack

The sound of heels clicking became louder and louder as it came towards me, causing me to become all too aware of my surroundings. Two small hands made their way to either of my shoulders. They shortly after moved to the railing next to where mine were placed. The situation seemed familiar. I wasn’t sure as to why.

“Good morning Soldier.”

Her voice was like a flute, surprisingly cheery and light despite our current dreary atmosphere. I turned to face the woman.

“Ready to comply.” I responded as I had learned to, or rather been programmed to.

She laughed. I was immensely confused by this action. The small Voice in my head that told me what to do and every response I needed to have all the time was seemingly absent.

“None of that, Soldier. I’m your friend, not your Tyrant.” She told me her name, but I didn’t pay much mind.

My instincts told me not to trust the girl.

She tutted.

“Soldier, if we’re going to be friends we need trust, yes?”

Her question was followed by silence.

“I won’t ask again, Soldier. Yes?”

I turned away from her towards the landscape view in front of me. Mountains could be seen if you squinted, everything covered in a blanket of snow, glistening in the rare sunlight of Siberia. I wasn’t sure why I was here rather than in cryo. It wasn’t for a mission, not an assassination of any sort, so why? I wasn’t sure of anything, my mind without the Voice was blank.

Suddenly, the woman’s seemingly gentle hands from before roughly grabbed my stubble ridden face, turning me towards her. Her grip tightened and her hand moved down to my throat, her cherry red nails digging into my skin, being sure to draw blood.

My breath was being cut off, and I assumed my skin was beginning to take a purple hue. Darkness began to cloud my vision as I started to slip into unconsciousness. I used my last ounce of strength and nodded.

She released me, tucking a stray strand of hair back into her bun. I fell down with a loud thud, supporting myself using the railing as I struggled to catch my breath. I looked up through hooded eyes and watched as the woman turned, speaking simultaneously as she did so.

“Very well. I’ll find us to be good friends, Soldier.”

She walked away, her heels clicking against the cold tile yet again. The guards came from either side of me, taking my arms and putting me into restraints, pushing me around like a ragdoll in the process. The cold metal stung on my pale and bruised skin, leaving a red ring to match the star on my left arm. 

The men surrounding me smelled like cigarette smoke and what could only be described as pure filth. The scent matched the words coming out of their mouths, talking loudly about the different women they had encountered in the past days and the things they wanted to do to them. 

The walk to my concrete chamber was treacherous, but nothing I wasn’t used to. I blinked, coming to attention at the sound of a key opening the small hole in the wall I called home when I wasn’t “on ice”.

My eyes turned from their glazed over state as they slammed the door shut, leaving me to wonder about what was to come.

 --------------------------------

The Tyrant

I released the man, tucking a strand of hair back into my too-tight bun. I viewed in horror the mark I had created on his neck, taking in the view that was a disgusting sum of purples, blues, and yellows that were complementing the red trickles of blood on his pale skin. The very sight of it and the fact I had done it gave me the overwhelming urge to throw up. But nonetheless I persisted. I had to.

I spoke, my voice coming across emotionless yet somehow bold, bouncing off the walls.

“Very well. I’ll find us to be good friends, Soldier.” I walked away, shallow breaths leaving my dry mouth. I brought up my hand, smoothing down my hair in an attempt to look put together despite feeling extremely distraught.

The head mental evaluator approached me, clipboard in hand. He squinted at my appearance for a moment, but then continued with his survey of sorts.

“How was he?” His Russian accent was thick and hard to understand. It had startled me in my dazed state. The man looked up, pushing his round, thickly rimmed glasses up his pudgy nose, waiting for a response, similarly to how I was in the minutes previous.

“Subject was unresponsive to exercise.” My voice remained quiet and without any sign of feeling.

He scribbled on a piece of paper attached to the wooden slab, the pen in his right hand scratching against the parchment. His foot was tapping, only adding to the tedious sounds filling the room.

“Was any physical force required for the subject to comply?” He seemed to be bored and tired, as any man would be after asking the same questions to different women every so often. I was not the first to be chosen for this experiment, but I was hoping I would be the last.

I stayed silent, replaying my crimes in my head, the feeling of the Soldier’s grimy skin ingrained in my brain, the coolness of it, the way it was so terribly slick.

“Was any force required?” He repeated, beady little black eyes meeting mine with a judgmental glance.

I blinked, crossing my hands in front of me.

“Yes. Slight physical force required.”

His eyes never left his page once they returned.

“Specify.”

“I grabbed the subject by the jaw, turned the subject’s face towards my own, and then restricted the subject’s breathing until they answered my question.”

“Does the subject require medical attention?”

I internally scoffed, as obviously even if he did, they weren’t going to give it to the poor man.

“No, the subject will be fine on his own.”

He sighed, flipping the page and looking it’s contents up and down.

“Very well,” he motioned to the guards on either side of the entrance.

“Your presence is no longer required at the moment. Return to your quarters. Hail HYDRA.”

I muttered a rushed, “Hail HYDRA” as I turned to exit.

“Also, Agent?” Behind me I heard the man speak up once more. I turned to face him.

“Don’t wear that lip color again, it makes you look like those Americans.”

I nodded, making a mental note to throw away the product.  Resuming my path of twisting corridors leading to my room, I was overly aware of the two guards who were on my tail, following me like a hunter stalking its prey.

“Thank you, I have it from here, gentlemen.” I smiled tightly through closed lips.

They nodded in unison, saluting with a brisk “Hail HYDRA.”

Early on in my time at the base I caught on to the goodbye ritual, and I hated it already.

I replied with the same nonchalantly before turning into my gloomy space and locking the doors.

I stripped down from my black uniform into a more comfortable slip, brushing out my hair and removing my makeup. I ran a cotton pad against my lips that were painted with the same color red that was on my nails. I watched in the mirror as the color smudged on my lips, running like the fresh blood that had streamed down the Soldier’s throat. I pulled away, looking down at my hands that I had only just noticed were trembling.

I let out a sudden sob, guilt taking its toll on me as I thought of what they had done, the victims that they had touched.

The things I had done, the victims I had touched.

I ran my hands through my hair, tugging. I stumbled over to my bed, pulling up the scratchy sheets. A terrible pain ripped through me, pressure building in the center of my head. 

I didn’t want to cry, I couldn’t cry. If my superiors heard, I’d be done for.

I didn’t want to hurt the man from earlier, but I had to. It was me or him.

☆☆☆☆☆✰✰✰✰☆☆☆✰✰✰✰

hello! this isn’t nearly as long as i would have liked but for development purposes i’m saving what chronologically would have come next for it’s own longer chapter rather than mushing a whole bunch of info into one mega chapter. tysm for reading, it means the world!!!! if u wanna be added to the taglist comment on this or the teaser or whatevs and i’ll add you! xx hj

btw my apologies for the extensive tags lolol 

taglist: 

@fangirls94​ 

[ikenbar]

Mr. Love: Ike’s Choice CH5 PT2

Warnings: Some swearing but like Ike is having a hard day so give her a break, talk of strippers and bikinis but it is literally just talk, some angst, the tiniest pinch of fluff, anger, hate, disputes between sisters, near death experiences and cLiFfHaNgErS!!!! :D

Also! This part is dedicated to one of my favorite teachers ever. Hats off to you Senior Olson... you got featured in a fanfiction... I know this must be the most riveting part of your entire teaching career...

(Chapter Five (Kiro and Youran) Prologue and part one can be found here~)

((Please read the author’s note (and the beginning of the story) on chapter one part one if you’re new here :D))

Chapter Five:

Part two:

I ran up the steps to the school in aggravation. My driver and I had been sitting in traffic for twenty minutes, killing all my time and patience slowly and painfully. I threw open the doors to the school and immediately locked eyes with Adri, who was slouching in one of the chairs just outside of Mr. Olson’s office. She sat up quickly in her chair.

“Oh thank goodness they called you!” She smiled, “I was afraid they’d call-”

“Zip it!” I snapped, taking Adri aback, “Need I remind you that you’ve been suspended?! Just because Bart or Maria didn’t pick you up, doesn't mean you have gotten off scot-free, lady.” Adri’s once excited face grew pale. Someone opened the door to the principal's office. 

Out stepped a tall man in his late sixties. With his back arched and his cane in his hand, he walked with a limp that screamed intimidation. His hair was receding and graying but most of the grey was centered on the bushy beard he brandished like a Norse god. Mr. Olson was a man that showed his years, but his eyes were still lit with the same fire that his younger self held. Even if they were hidden behind his thick, oval glasses.

“I thought I heard you out here.” Mr. Olson smiled at me, “It’s good to see you again Ike.”

“Sir.” Though I spoke impatiently, I still bowed with respect, “Listen, I would love to sit and talk but I’m running late for a shoot for a show. Is there any way we can speed this up?”

“Oof.” Mr. Olson chuckled and turned to Adri, “You chose the wrong day to be suspended.” Mr. Olson looked back at me and gestured into his office, “I just need you to sign some papers for me. Then I can send you on your merry way.” I nodded and followed him into the office, grabbing Adri and pulling her by the collar to follow us. I was handed a small packet of paper by a smiling receptionist as Mr. Olson pulled Adri aside.

My phone buzzed from my pocket. Without looking at the ID, I answered.

 “Speaking.”

“I have a bone to pick with you.” 

It was Bart.

“What?” I moaned as I flipped through the pages of the packet.

“You know the filming studio we rented for the day?”

“Yeah?”

“Why didn’t you tell me we had changed the location?”

I froze. 

“...what?” I asked through clenched teeth.

“The studio stopped me from going in and said we didn’t have the studio today! Then, when I told him who I was, he told me that we had cancelled our time there! I called the crew and they told me that they got an email that we had changed to a different location! So now, I look like a fool! Why didn’t you tell me we switched studios!?”

“Because I didn’t!” I signed the papers quickly and handed the receptionist the packet, “I have no recollection about sending an email! What studio do we have now?”

“The FASL Studio. On the other side of town. It’s a good thing I decided to come early! The donuts ended up being cold though.”

“OTHER SIDE OF TOWN?!” I roared, despite my calm surroundings, “I’m at the school! I’m going to be late!”

“The school?” Bart asked, suddenly sounding worried, “Why? What happened?!”

“Your new daughter reenacted a scene from a 80s highschool sitcom.” I huffed, holding the bridge of my nose, “Does the cast know about the change?”

“Yeah. They are already here. What do you mean by-”

“I’ll tell you when I get there. I gotta go. Bye.” I quickly hung up and grabbed Adri’s arm. “Sorry, Sir.” I said hurriedly. “I gotta go. I’ll be sure to make sure Adri is doing her work and feeling guilty about what she has done. Goodbye.” I hurried out of the principal’s office. 

>

Mr Olson shook his head as the girls left. “Still the same Ike.” He said, turning back into his office.

>

I pulled Adri into the car and gave the driver the new address of the studio. “And try to find a way around that traffic.” I huffed, “I’m going to be late as it is.”

“I’m not going home?” Adri asked, stupidly.

“No.” I kept my eyes glued on my phone as I pulled up my email, “We are going to the studio. But you aren’t going to be doing anything but work. Did Mr. Olson give you a packet to work on?”

“Yeah.” Adri hesitated, showing me the large packet in her hand, “It’s just busy work. They don’t even grade me for it.”

“I don’t care.” I stretched my jaw, “You’re doing it.” Adri opened her mouth to protest but closed it as I cursed. In my sent emails was the email Bart was talking about. It talked about moving locations for the day and how I was sorry for the inconvenience it might bring. 

Except I didn’t write it. 

I would have called Bart to tell him. I would have even told the crew in person if I had the chance. 

There was no way I had sent that email. 

I scrolled down to look at the email's information. 

But before I could read it, my phone screen glitched. I growled and hit it. A high pitched noise radiated from my speakers, causing me to yelp and hold the phone away from me as Adri covered her ears.

“Turn it off!!” She called.

“I don’t know how!!” I screamed, jamming the volume down button on the side of the phone. The ringing stopped and the phone’s screen turned white. A cursive black text gradually appeared on the screen.

“Brought to you by your friend, Key”

 Then, the screen went black. Adri and I stared at the phone, trying to process what had just happened. I tried turning the phone back on. 

Nothing. 

I tried holding the power button down.

 Still nothing.

“Oh come ON!” I boomed, pressing the button repeatedly, “You’ve got to be kidding me. I’ve only had this phone for a week! Victor told me it was the best they had! What the hell?!” I growled and threw my phone into my lap. I rested my elbows on my knees and threw my head in my hands. An awkward silence washed over the car.

“... would it help if I said I feel really bad for what I did?” Adri asked timidly.

>>>

I pulled Adri by the wrist as I ran into the studio. We were only a few minutes late thanks to a shortcut past the traffic but I wasn’t taking any chances. I flashed the guard my id card and pushed open the door. People were bustling around the large studio carrying various tools, set pieces, and props. I pushed through the crowd and searched the faces. I spotted Bart speaking to someone by the snack table. He was a young man with beautiful blonde hair, piercing blue eyes, and a stunning smile.

“Ho thank goodness.” I breathed deeply, “Kiro made it.”

“WHAT!?!” Adri exclaimed from next to me, “KIRO’S-” I tugged at her wrist, quieting her. 

“No.” I hissed, “Not for children who don’t respect the few who don’t get paid nearly enough to deal with their bull.” I flagged down a crew member, “Excuse me. Where are the dressing rooms?” The employee gestured to a wall with multiple doors on it. I thanked him and pulled Adri with me as I walked to them. I opened one and pushed her inside. “Now you’re going to sit in here and work on your packet.” I pointed angrily to her. 

“What?!” Adri scoffed, “I am literally within spitting distance with my idol, and you won’t even let me see him?!”

“No.”

“Why?!”

“You know why!!” I barked, “You started a riot in the middle of class!! I had to be pulled away from an important breakfast to pick you up!”

“What, with the friend you met a week ago?” Adri snapped, “The little producer that is so small even I can-”

“Shut your mouth.” I spoke menacingly through my teeth. The air in the room became tense and strangely cold. Adri stopped talking, “You say anything insulting or degrading about that woman and I swear you'll regret the very second you met me, do I make myself clear?” Adri seemed at the verge of saying something but, in fear of her life, she kept her smart mouth shut. “Now I’m going to go do my work and you’re going to do yours. And you'll do it in this room and silently. End of discussion.” I turned and headed out the door.

“Worst sister ever.” Adri said under her breath.

“Deal with it, princess. This is what happens when you break the rules.” I slammed the door shut with those last words. The entire studio went silent as the bang of the door echoed through the hall. I took a moment to catch my breath. Never had I ever lost my temper like that. Sure, it has been a stressful day but… the moment she brought up Youran… Something in me snapped. Like it was my job to- I shook my head, Now was not the time to be thinking about this kind of thing. I've got shit to do.

I cleared my throat and looked around. My eyes landed on a security guard nearby. “You!” I called, pointing at him. He jumped and came to attention. I pointed to the ground next to me. He quickly walked over to me.

“Yes, mam?” He asked.

“I want you to stand at this door and not let anyone in or out without letting me know first. Do you understand?”

“Yes, mam.” The guard assumed his position at the door. I looked around the still silent studio. “Young!” I walked briskly over to the director, “Fill me in. And make it quick.”

>

“Oh no.” Bart hissed as Young took Ikamara around the studio, “Ike’s in a bad mood.” 

“Ike?” Kiro asked, watching them as well, “Is that the Ike you were talking about? Your other producer?”

“Yup.” Bart sighed, “I was hoping you would catch her on a better day. She is a very kind person, really, but she can sometime be-”

“Why is this not done?!” Ike’s harsh voice carried over the quiet studio, “I’m late once and you guys think it’s time to slack off?!”

Bart leaned close to Kiro and whispered softly to him, “... I know you asked for her specifically, but I would be more than happy to spend the day showing you around if you’d prefer it.”

“Don’t worry.” Kiro smiled sweetly, “I think I can handle it.”

>

I shoved the clipboard back into Young’s arms, “Too much needs to get done in too little time.” I growled, “Quit lollygagging and do your job. I don’t pay you to sit back and do nothing!” Young skulked off, clearly embarrassed. 

“Man!” A familiar voice spoke from next to me, “You really tore into him!” I turned and saw Minor walking to me. He wore a pleasant smile but that vanished when he saw my face. “Something wrong boss?”

“'Something wrong?'” My tone dripped with anger, “You’re twenty minutes late, Minor! I’ve fired for less!”

“S-sorry, boss!” Minor’s tone quickly changed, “I-I went to the wrong location! I didn’t know we had changed studios! Th-then I couldn’t get a hold of you and got stuck in traffic... I promise it won’t happen again!” I glared at Minor. He gulped and bowed deeply. After a moment, I loosened my jaw.

“Don’t worry about it.” I grumbled, rubbing the bridge of my nose to steam my growing headache, “I was late for the same reason. Sorry for snapping. It’s… been a long day.” Minor relaxed and stood up straight again.

“No problem.” He smiled kindly, “It happens! Maybe it’s just in the air. I was told an email went out about the location change? But I didn’t get one. Maybe we were both meant to have a bad day.”

“Right.” I said slowly, “... you have a thing for conspiracies, right, Minor?” 

“Yeah.” Minor chuckled, "You can say that."

“What about hackers? You know anything about them?” 

“Of course!”

“What can you tell me about a hacker named, Key?”

“Key??” Minor asked excitedly, “Man, what don’t I know about them?? Let’s see, well, to start off, they are a white hat hacker. Meaning that what they do what they do ethically.” I huffed and folded my arms. Ethically?? What is so ethical about sending my company on a wild goose chase and killing my phone?! 

Someone tapped my shoulder. I whipped my head around with a glare, only to drop it as my eyes met a familiar ocean of blue.

“Hi!” Kiro smiled kindly, “I’m Kiro. I think you’re the person that’s assigned to help me around the studio today.” I froze and examined his face up close for the first time in weeks.

“... You’re supposed to be in makeup.” I growled, “Where is Gina? Gina!”

“I’ll let you be.” Minor chuckled nervously, backing away from my once again rising, wrothful mood.

I dragged Kiro around the studio, preparing him with makeup and costumes and scripts, giving neither of us a break from the hustle. “Young.” I stopped the stage director and pointed to Kiro, “Get him ready for the first scene.” Young nodded and gestured for Kiro to follow him. I turned and began to walk away

“Give me a second.” Kiro grabbed my arm and held a finger up to the director. He pulled me aside, “Can I ask you a quick question?”

“Is it about the shoot?” I asked seriously.

“...No?” Kiro answered slowly. I opened my mouth to protest, “It’ll be super fast!” Kiro begged, clapping his hands together, “I promise!” I looked at him with an arched eyebrow. He clutched his hands together and brought them up to his mouth, smiling sweetly. I sighed.

“Fine.” I placed the clipboard down and gave him my full attention, “What is it?”

“It’s about the girl that gave you my information.” Kiro asked excitedly, “When will she get here? She said we would be working together today.” 

I froze, my heart sinking to my feet.

Didn’t he recognize my voice? We’ve talked a fair few times. Maybe he forgot what I sounded like… or maybe I had scared him that day with how awful I was treating everyone. Maybe he thought Super Stranger wouldn’t be so hard on her employees. Maybe he didn’t want it to be someone like me… maybe he didn’t want it to be me.

I cleared my throat, “She called and canceled. Something about having something important come up... Sorry.” Kiro’s face fell slightly.

“Oh.” He nodded, still holding a soft smile, “Ok. Thanks!” Kiro forced a larger smile on his face as he walked away from me. I sighed, fighting the lump in my throat. This is why you never meet your idols. 

>>>

Kiro stood on stage for his first scene. I stood next to the camera man, correcting his poor angle. “Ike?” I looked over my shoulder and spotted the costume designer walking over to me with one of the extras dressed as a motorcyclist. “The clasp is stuck on his helmet. I think It’s jammed. Bart said I should go to you?” I took off my blazer and motioned for the extra to come closer to me as the lights in the room dimmed.

“Playback!” Young called through her mega phone, “And… ACTION!” Keeping most of my attention on the extra, I glanced at the stage. Kiro was sitting in a chair by a large desk. He was leaning back, carelessly kicking his feet up onto the table. There was a knocking sound. 

“Come in.” Kiro said, nonchalantly. Even though Kiro was normally so bright, the character he played wasn’t. We had written him to be someone no one would like. Though I was scared Kiro wouldn’t be able to play the character well, his acting was as amazing as ever, stifling any doubt I had. Kiro had this in the bag.

“Dexter Stackman?” The female actor asked as she entered on cue, “The Private investigator?”

“Is that what it says on the door?” Kiro asked.

“Yes?”

“Then you’ve obviously got the wrong person. Try the next room over.”

The crew stifled their laughter. I finally got the clasp undone and helped the extra take the helmet off. “I’ll keep it with me.” I assured the costume designer as she reached to take the helmet, “I think I know how to stop it from doing it again.” She nodded and backed off. I looked at the clasp as I continued to listen to the scene.

“So you're Dexter.” The actress pouted, “I need your help.”

“What help could I give? I’m just some dude sitting at the wrong desk, apparently.”

A creaking noise came from the stage. I looked up. 

“Please, sir. You’re the only one who will listen!”

“Obviously not. Goodbye now!”

I searched the stage carefully with my eyes. Where was that creaking coming from? That’s going to mess with the audio!

“But this case is one you’d be interested in!”

“Does it involve strippers that have had their bikinis stolen?”

“No?”

“Then you’re wrong.”

I huffed and looked up. My breath hitched in my throat. A light swung tediously above the stage. It was rocking unnaturally, almost as if it was about to fall.

I looked straight down from the light. Right under it sat the nonchalant, quipping, boneheaded Dexter, completely unaware of the predicament he was in. 

I threw on the helmet.

“But I-”

“Listen lady,” Kiro stood from his seat and pointed at the actress, “I’ve already told you, I’m not-”

There was a loud snap. Kiro looked above him in time to see the light come hurtling towards his head. I dove into the scene, leaping over the desk and ramming myself into Kiro’s chest, sending us both flying off of the stage. We hit the ground hard as a crash came from behind us. I propped myself up hurriedly to look at Kiro.

“Are you ok?” I asked quickly, inspecting Kiro for any obvious injuries. Nothing was strange except for the rising smile on his face

“Super Stranger!” He threw his arms up in triumph, “I thought you were-” Something clicked on the floor below us. Kiro and I froze. Suddenly, the ground we were laying on flipped backwards, sending Kiro and me into the hole it created. Kiro quickly grabbed onto me tightly as we were launched into darkness.

(Next)

[writings-andstuff]

“Don’t Objectify Me” (Dean x Reader)

The first of two for tonight and then I’ve got to study for my finals tomorrow. 

Happy Reading!

Words: 1971

Pairing: Dean x Reader

Warnings: Excessive cuteness

Excerpt:  He huffed again but stayed silent.  The three of you, with the help of Cas back at the bunker, were investigating a string of homicides in Oklahoma.  Three people had been killed inside of a week, but that hadn’t even been the strangest part.  The bodies hadn’t just been mutilated, they’d been practically decimated.  Their chests had been ripped open and their lungs had been removed.  It was positively gruesome.

Forever Tags: @fairchild21

Tagging: @beccaanne814-blog

You paced back and forth waiting for Dean to come out of the house of one of the victims.  Of course, you couldn’t go in with him—you were the watchdog. You were always the watchdog.  Dean was always the one putting himself in the line of fire, and you were always just...watching.

“Easy kid,” Dean said, coming up behind you.  “You’re gonna wear a hole in the concrete.”

You gasped and hit him in the shoulder, hard. “Oh my god, you idiot! You scared the crap out of me. I almost pulled my gun on you.”

Dean gave you a sly smirk and walked around the side of the Impala, leaning over the top for a second to talk to you.  “Well, don’t do that.  Don’t wanna have to tell my brother that my girlfriend made me Swiss cheese because I scared her.”

“Then don’t scare me,” you shot back, sliding into the front seat of the Impala and waiting for Dean to follow suit.  After he did, he put the keys in the ignition and the car rumbled to life.  “So, did you find anything? Hex bags? Sulfur?”

“Nada,” he grumbled.  “But I still say it’s a demon.  There’s just nothing about the killings that screams witchy business to me.”

“‘Witchy business’?” you questioned with a raised eyebrow.  He started off down the road.  “I don’t know, Dean. I gotta stick with Sam on this one.  Witches seem to be the most likely culprit.”

Dean huffed.  “I thought you were supposed to side with me.”

“Only when you’re right,” you countered.  “And anyways, if you’re right, you get bragging rights against not one, but two people. But you’re not right.”

He huffed again but stayed silent.  The three of you, with the help of Cas back at the bunker, were investigating a string of homicides in Oklahoma.  Three people had been killed inside of a week, but that hadn’t even been the strangest part.  The bodies hadn’t just been mutilated, they’d been practically decimated.  Their chests had been ripped open and their lungs had been removed.  It was positively gruesome.

You and Sam were thinking a witch because, contrary to what Dean had said, it screamed ‘witchy business’ to the two of you.  But Dean was having none of it. He was sure it was the work of some demon just looking for humans to kill. The only problem with his theory was that removing a specific organ from those bodies seemed like more of a ritual than an MO.  

The two of you met Sam back at the motel room to find out what he’d learned from the bodies in the coroner’s morgue.  

When you got back, Sam was sitting on the edge of one of the beds with his tie and suit jacket stripped off. He looked up at the two of you as you entered the room and shut the door.  He looked almost green, which was odd since Sam was usually the most composed and least queasy around dead bodies, especially the gory ones.  

“I’m guessing it was as gross as we thought it would be,” you said, giving him a small pat on the back as you passed the bed to sit in a chair by the small table. Dean dumped himself down on the other bed and began undoing the buttons on his flannel so that his black T-shirt underneath could be seen.

“Worse,” Sam grumbled.  

“Well,” Dean turned to look at you and Sam.  “We got nothing at the vic’s house.  That was the last of the three and still nothing.”

Sam gulped down air before speaking.  “Well, there were no hex bags in the bodies.”

You shook your head.  “Okay, so let’s go down the list—”

“The very short list,” Dean put in.

“Can’t be a demon since there was no sulfur,” you said, ignoring him.  “Not a witch, because there were no hex bags, and nothing to suggest witchy activity.”

Dean smirked.  “‘Witchy activity?’”

You threw a plastic fork at him from last night’s take-out dinner of cheese burgers and fries.  He frowned down at where it hit his thigh.

“You see this, Sammy,” Dean said to his brother.  “Before she threatened to poke holes in me, now she’s trying to spear me with plastic utensils.”

Sam frowned and looked over at you. “You threatened to shoot him?”

“He scared me,” you told him plainly.

Sam nodded as if this was all the clarification he needed and turned back to Dean. “Shouldn’t’ve scared her, Dean.”

Dean picked up the fallen fork and threw it at Sam who expertly dodged it.  His color was starting to return to normal, which reminded you of your list.  You sighed.  

“Okay, focus guys,” you said.  “No ectoplasm means no vengeful spirit.  No dead family members or friends who would want them dead, which means no ghost. I believe this is what the kids call an impasse.”

“Nope,” Dean sighed.  “Think that’s just you, sweetheart.”

“There’re more forks here, Dean,” you warned. “I wouldn’t push your luck.”

He put his hands up in a sign of surrender.

“Wait,” Sam said in his ‘I think I’ve got something’ voice.  “What if it is a ghost?”

You didn’t have time to respond because Sam was already up and sitting at the table across from you in front of his laptop.  He tapped away as Dean came to stand behind you, one hand on the back of your chair and the other on the tabletop.

“Care to fill us in, Sammy?” Dean said.

Sam kept typing.  “Just think about it.  We don’t really know that much about ghosts.  We know that if they stay long enough, they go vengeful. We know that when they expend lots of energy, they leave behind ectoplasm. We know that they can haunt things, people, and even places.  Sometimes they don’t know what they’re doing, sometimes they do. The truth is, we don’t really know all that much about how much ghosts can do.”

You frowned.  He was right, of course.  Dean had once caught a ghost virus and it almost stopped his heart.  On their first hunt together, Sam and Dean had encountered a woman in white who had almost killed Sam.  Even Bobby had been attached to his whiskey flask after he’d died.  You’d seen an entire building haunted by one ghost alone, and you’d seen one dilapidated house haunted by many ghosts.  

But there was one problem with his theory.

“Yes,” you said, “but we’ve never seen ghosts do this.  Not since the breaking of the seals to free Lucifer.  The witnesses.”

“Aha!” Sam exclaimed, flicking his computer screen.  You and Dean moved to the other side of the table to inspect it.  

“Uh, care to explain this to us normal folk, Sammy?” Dean asked, pointing to the screen. It was a picture of a thin man in his late fifties maybe, wearing a porkpie hat and a tweed jacket.  

“We were looking for a link to the victims, here’s our link,” Sam pointed to the man on the screen.  “Meet Professor Ike Weizmann. He was an Anatomy and Physiology professor at the university in Norman.  It says that last year he suffered a severe asthma attack in his lab during a lecture and died. Apparently, his family filed a lawsuit against the board of the University last year because they thought the attack was caused by mold in the walls that went left unchecked.  A week before the court date, all of the members of the board quit and the school was closed for an entire month before they were replaced.”

Dean licked his bottom lip.  “Please tell me that there were only three members on that board.”

Sam shook his head and clicked onto another page on his laptop.  He pointed to a list of people.  “There are two more: Lisa Warren and Keith Garfield. Both live in the area.”

You shook your head.  “Based on the pattern, it seems like he’s been killing them every twenty-four hours.  But, I don’t get it—why wait until a year after his death to come and get his vengeance?”

Sam turned in his chair to face the two of you, shaking his head.  “I have no idea.  Maybe he was waiting for the right time? Who knows.  But I’ve got the addresses for both of the other board members.”

“How much time until the next murder?” Dean asked you.

“Um,” you did some quick math in your head.  “Well, McCreedy was killed somewhere around eleven last night, they think.  It’s eight now.  So, three hours, give or take.”

“We’ll split up,” Sam said.  “Dean, you take Keith and I’ll take Lisa.  He’s only going to kill one tonight, and they live on opposite sides of town so—”

“So whoever finds Professor Bowler Hat,” Dean cut in, “is on their own until backup comes.”

“I don’t like this plan,” you said.  “Wait, uh, what is the plan, exactly? Specifically, what am I doing while one of you is almost dying?”

“Nobody’s gonna die,” Dean assured you.  

Sam nodded his agreement.  “You’re going to go to the cemetery in the middle of town.  According to the archives, Weizmann was buried. So you’re gonna burn the remains.”

You could see it in Dean’s clenched jaw and tight shoulders that he didn’t like you going on your own, but he also knew that you could handle yourself. You were no damsel in distress, and he knew that.  Nevertheless, you laced your fingers through his.  “I’ll be fine.  Just burning bones.  Nothing new.”

He sighed. “I know. Alright,” he looked at Sam.  “I’ll drop you off by Lisa, then Y/N by the cemetery, and then I’ll head over by Keith.”

“If I burn the bones,” you said, “you guys should still stay there until after eleven, just to be sure.”

“Alright,” Sam said. “Let’s get ready and go.  The faster we get this over-with, the faster we get back to the bunker.”

The rest of the salt ’n burn went off without a hitch.  You were thrown into a tree, but you managed to light fire to the bones before the ghost killed anyone. Of course, Dean overreacted about the head injury you had.

Cas met the three of you in the war room when you returned the next day.  He offered to heal you, but you refused, much to Dean’s dismay.  You let Dean clean the cut at your hairline, though, and listened to him go on a tangent about how he should’ve been there with you.

You waited patiently until he was done talking to tell him your piece about how you were fine and the three of you had had a job to do.  Burning the bones just happened to be yours.  All three of you had an equally dangerous job.  

As it was, Ike only attacked you because you were holding matches above his open casket.  It was to no avail on his end, though, because you managed to burn them anyways.  Dean came over after and helped Sam put the dirt back over the grave, having you wait in the Impala.  

“I still should’ve been there with you,” Dean stood before you, his arms crossed and his jaw set.

“Dean, its just a cut,” you told him.  “I’m fine.  But I would really like to sleep for the next day.”

His features softened, but only slightly. “It’s late. C’mon.  Let’s go to bed.”

You grinned at him and hopped off of the library table. “Yes, please.”

“But you gotta sleep on your own pillow,” he said with a small smile, roping his arm around your waist, though you were fine to walk and had told him so several times.  

“Why?” you whined.  “You’re such a comfy pillow.”

“Don’t objectify me.”

[spacednp]

the second longest fic (i think??) i have (so far) that actually doesnt have a title

wattpad link

i still didnt even reread it to check for typos :)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Tw: lots of dirty jokes, not smut but there's a kissy kiss, don't read if you plan on sleeping ;p jk it's not too too bad but it could be considered a little creepy so don't sue me if you're reading this at 3 am in a forest and now you're terrified also this is unedited bc wow that's long

AND YES IK THE TITLES LAME AF I DIDNT KNOW WHAT TO CALL IT XD

Srry about the random A/Ns I threw in I couldn't help it lmao

Magical AU kind of thing you'll like it trust meh

Wc: (this is a longen') 6.7k :0

Once Upon A Time...

Dan sighed as he looked out the window of the wooden carriage. He really hated traveling. Really really hated it. The blur of the dark silhouettes of trees filled his vision and the chill of winter hit his face as the carriage tugged into the night.

Dan, or Prince Daniel James Howell of Turntima as he was formally addressed, was on his way to the kingdom of Troi to have a meeting with its king, King Austial in regards to his eldest daughter's hand in marriage. It wasn't for love, it wasn't even Dan's idea. No, it was planned even before he was born, an arranged marriage. Marriage was just a contact, a treaty of peace. It meant nothing more. Maybe that was why Dan wasn't very opposed to the idea of marriage, because he was convinced it meant nothing.

The carriage stopped abruptly. What? No, this wasn't Troi, they weren't even close, Dan knew that much. He could of sworn he saw something deep in the forest move, a quick flash of something lanky and dark. Well that wasn't good, and now Dan was suddenly aware of a deep aching fear in the pit of the stomach, he felt like he was being watched. "What's happening?" Dan asked the driver. It was just he and the driver, it was a rare occasion where Dan was unguarded, which wasn't very bright he supposed as bandits were known to roam the woods they had to travel.

The horses screeched as if in fear. "I have no clue, the horses just stopped, Your Highness," The driver replied. In a spilt second though, the movement caught Dan's eye again, but now his suspicion of something there was confirmed. One minute they were alone and only the unmarked snow and dark trees surrounded them, but then, a second later, dark creatures with lanky limbs appeared.

They had beady blood red eyes that seemed to glow in the darkness and claw like fingers attacked to the ends of the limbs. Their mouths were just pits in their faces with sharp and thorn like teeth lacing the inside. A sudden chilly breeze swept over the carriage and the torches that once lit the carriage blew out swiftly.

Dan wanted to scream, wanted to cry for help, but a lump in his throat prevented the cries from escaping. He wished he could see, he was terrified. He knew monsters like this existed, but he hadn't read up on them much, never expecting to be in a situation where the information would be important, much less crucial for his survival.

Sharp cries of pain from the horses filled the air as the creatures devoured their flesh and Dan was suddenly glad he couldn't see what they were doing, for he knew what he saw would fill his nightmares. Even the cries they let out would scar him, that is if he lived through this to dream another night.

The monsters ate fast though and next came the driver, and this was more terrifying to Dan because it was another human. Of course Dan had some compassion for the horses, but knowing that the creatures had a taste for human, that wasn't good. The creatures ripped off the door to the carriage and the crunching of the man's bones filled the air soon and the iron sent of blood filled Dan's nose. The cries for help. The hopelessness Dan felt, the way he knew this was soon to be his dark fate.

Wasn't it kind of romantic in a way? Knowing your embedding doom lay ahead so soon? You spend your whole life worrying about it, but when it's right in front of you how are you to feel? You know it's coming, but does that offer any relief? Or does it provide terror? Both?

Dan couldn't even distinguish his emotions before the creatures turned their blood thirsty attention to Dan. Their eyes sort of glowed in a way, illuminating their faces with a red light. Their claws were stained with blood and flesh remained stuck in their teeth. The growling noises they made, deep and spine chilling.

A howl from a wolf in the distance. Dan's body shook, he couldn't move though. Claws gripped has shoulders and he was ripped out from the carriage and slammed into the snowy ground. He faintly saw the outline of lots of splotches and three larger pools of blood. He felt bile rise in his throat, thats what he fate was. A pool of crimson staining pure, crisp white snow.

The creatures looked down at him and his heart felt like it was going to explode with how fast it was beating, slamming into his rib cage. He shut his eyes tightly and thought he would never open them again. This was the end. This was death. The snarl of a wolf. What? Why did that sound so close? Ripping, tearing, screaming. Dan's body burned with the contact as the creatures clawed at him.

"Serelia! Don't just stand there! Make your stupid mangy mutt do something!" The voice of a male called. That wasn't one of the creatures though, no, that was a human. The voice was warm and almost made Dan feel peaceful despite the fact that he was bleeding to death. Sleep sounded very good... wow Dan was tired.

"She's not a mutt!" A woman's voice. "Anyway, Rix is already on it," shortly after those words were spoken, a sound, almost like twigs snapping, was heard. Suddenly no more claws raked at Dan. He felt someone drag him away from the carriage and he was pushed onto his feet.

"Alright, you gotta work with me here, try to walk, yeah?" The male's voice. Dan nodded his head weakly. He opened his eyes and was greeted by raven hair and icy blue eyes. Dan tried his best, but his legs weren't cooperating very well. His eyes shut again.

"He's half dead," The woman's voice spoke, didn't the male call her 'Serelia'? "That's no good, what are we going to do with a half dead prince?"

"Shut up and help me out," The male's voice snapped. "He's heavy." Were these people bandits? Were they going to kill Dan? No, they saved Dan. Whatever it was they were going to do with Dan, it wasn't kill him.

"Aye aye, captain," Serelia said. He felt another arm wrap around him. "Try not to bleed on me too much, you hear? Blood isn't my favorite thing to scrub at."

"Shut up," The male hissed. Dan didn't think he really liked the Serelia girl, she wasn't very nice. Then again, Dan could hardly form a coherent though. "What about your little puppy dog?" The man asked.

"She'll follow, she knows her way around, anyway even if she doesn't follow I'm not too hard to find with her," She answered. "Now follow my lead, I know somehow who could probably save this royal pain in the ass." Dan didn't hear what the male had to say to that because he drifted off, unconscious.

---

When Dan woke up he was laying on something very soft. He didn't open his eyes though, he just laid there. Suddenly a conversation filled his ears and he couldn't help but to eavesdrop.

"Serelia, isn't it nice to see you," an unfamiliar voice spoke.

"Skip the small talk, Litzu. Just take care of the boy and we'll be on our way," that was Serelia's voice, Dan knew that much.

"Eh, I don't feel like it," The woman Serelia called Litzu said. Dan didn't like this lady either. "Motivate me."

"He's bleeding to death for fucks sake! I don't care what past you too need to work out, do it on your own time, right now this guy is dying!" The male from earlier yelled. Dan thought he liked this guy, he seemed the nicest. Also, he didn't seem like he wanted to kill Dan, which was definitely a plus.

"It wouldn't be the first dead body Serelia had to dump," Litzu growled. The wolf from earlier made some kind of a growling sound as well, probably against Litzu and pro Serelia, if Dan had to guess.

"He's a prince," Serelia's voice was rough and laced with anger. "I'm sure everyone would be glad to have him back, maybe a monetary reward would be involved. Is that enough to motivate you to heal him?" The wolf was still growling.

"Ah, you know me so well, love," Litzu purred. Dan slipped back into darkness after hearing this though.

---

Dan awoke for the second time to the warm smells of ginger and rosemary. His muscles ached and he was very sore, but other than that, at least he wasn't dead. His eyes fluttered open to see a blurry pair of icy blue eyes looking down at him. He blinked his vision into focus and the person leaning over him pulled back.

"He's awake," The makes voice spoke.

"G'Morning, Sleeping Beauty," Serelia's voice purred. It came from a woman in a sold black dress with a deep purple hood on her torso, it was laced in the front with black sting, a bow tied it off at the top so it didn't fall off. Her raven hair was amazingly long and tied in a side ribbon so it fell down her right side. She had large pale grey eyes that resembled the moon itself. Her thin pale face showed no emotion.

The male with icy blue eyes stood next to her, his arms crossed in front of his chest, but a soft smile on his soft pink lips. There were bags under his eyes, one of those eyes was half covered with jet black raven fringe, in the same fashion as Dan's though his hair was a chestnut brown color and facing the other direction. He wore a brown jacket over a pale blue (and very stained) button up, black jeans, and black boots.

The other person, whom Dan assumed was Litzu, was shorter than the male by a least six inches but taller than Serelia by a two or three inches. She had short blonde hair the barely reached her shoulders and eyes that lacked color so much they were pretty much white that was tinted green. She wore a white dress that was pretty much summer attire, which slightly confused Dan as it was winter, but he wasn't about to question someone that very well might of just saved his life.

Dan sat up slowly and stretched his arms, wincing slightly as he did so. He opened his eyes again and blinked a few times. "Thanks," Dan said, "for saving me, I mean." He elaborated.

"Don't thank me, this brat made me do it, I wanted to watch you die slowly," Serelia confessed, slapping the male on the back. Dan then notice the wolf with pale grey fur and bright blue eyes sitting at her feet who seemed to hum in agreement. "The name's Serelia by the way."

"Don't worry about her, she's just still grumpy because she got locked up in a dungeon for two years," The male said, smirking. "M'names Phil,"

"I'm Litzu and I'm the actual reason you're still alive," Litzu piped up. Serelia rolled her eyes and the wolf scoffed. Phil slapped Serelia on the arm.

"Uh, right, okay then," Dan crossed his legs and didn't take his eyes off of the wolf. "What's up with the dog?" He finally said.

"Rix is not a dog!" Serelia yelped.

"Oh no, now you've got her started," Phil facepalmed. Dan was confused, what did he do? He just asked about the dog.

"She's a fimilar, first of all, second, she's a wolf," She hissed. The wolf made a noise Dan assumed was in agreement to what Serelia said. "Also, she's that one that actually saved you."

"Okay so maybe it was a team effort," Litzu said. "But I was a big part of it."

"Well Rix saved him before you!"

"He wouldn't be alive right now without my herbs!"

"Well Rix saved him first still!"

"Stop arguing!" Phil yelled, cutting them off. "You sound like two five year olds arguing over who'll get the last cookie!" Dan couldn't help but smile at that, he found it amusing. He also noted that to some degree two fairly attractive girls were fighting over him.

Dan looked around the cabin he was in as the three continued their little argument. There was a little kitchen area with a table and two chairs, some counter space, cabinets, and a wood burning stove, no sink or icebox though (which made sense Dan guessed because they were in the middle of the forest, where would the electricity and water come from?) there was a sofa, a coffee table, a stack of wood which Dan assumed was for the stove, and then the bed Dan was laying on. (There was also two backpacks sat next to the door but those looked out of place and Dan assumed they belonged to Serelia and Phil)

Dan looked down at himself. His button up shirt was torn and stained to the point of no repair. However, his jeans seemed to be rather intact, which was good. His chest and arms were pretty beat up, lots of scratches, a particular one across Dan's stomach was the most concerning to Dan, but it seemed pretty manageable. There was some weird herb mix rubbed on Dan's wounds, it was very potent and almost overwhelming, but if it was healing him Dan had noting against it.

"Earth to princey boy," Serelia's voice broke into Dan's thoughts. He looked up to see all three of them looking at Dan expectingly. Had someone been talking to him?

"Uh, what?" Dan asked. Phil laughed a little but had the decency to cover it up with a fake cough when he saw no one else thought it was funny.

"I repeat, where were you going all fancied up?" Serelia said, glaring at Dan, looking very annoyed and unamused.

"Oh uh, Troi, fiancé stuff," Dan replied vaguely. "Also it's kind of late for this but I should probably tell you my name, er, if you don't know..?"

"Prince Daniel Howell, of course we know," Serelia rolled her eyes as she said his name. "Anyway, more important matters, fiancé?"

"Oh, heh right, yeah, I'm kind of famous," Dan muttered. "You'd think I'd remember that."

"The guy has bloody dementia I swear," Serelia hissed. "Fiancé. Talk."

"Oh right!" Dan yelped. Phil cough laughed again but Dan ignored it. "Yeah, sorry. Anyway yeah we were going to settle official business and my hand in marriage was to be offered to King Austial's eldest daughter, what was her name again? Melissa?"

"Melanie," Phil coughed as if to make it subtle. "Oh wow looks like I have a cold, lots of coughing."

"Oh yes it's suddenly come to me, her name is Melanie," Dan said, trying to hide his smile.

"You're going to marry a girl you don't even kn-what?" Litzu stuttered. Dan laughed a little. "What's so funny?"

"It's not for love, royal marriages never are, why do you think they're so many royal affairs?" He asked rhetorically. Litzu seemed to ponder this for a moment.

"Well what if you like, fall in love with her?" She suggested. Dan couldn't hide his laugh that time, it was too funny and ironic.

"That won't happen," He said bluntly after he'd stopped laughing long enough to get a word in.

"Well why not? Don't be rude I'm sure she's really nice and-" Dan cut Litzu off.

"Because I'm gay, I don't like girls." He told her. Her cheeks flushed and Phil didn't cover his laughter with a cough that time, he doubled over laughing.

"It's not funny!" She squeaked. Dan joined Phil in laughing because the whole thing was very ironic and Dan couldn't help but be amused at it.

"Sorry to break this up, but am I the only one concerned with us actually having to do something with Danny Boy here?" Serelia said, placing a hand on her hip and glaring at everyone in turn. Her wolf had abandoned the ground and now laid curled up in the corner, asleep.

"What do you mean?" Phil asked, brows furrowed in confusion.

"Well he has to get to Troi eventually and we're gonna help, yeah?" Serelia said. Phil nodded in agreement. "Well then we need to talk plans."

"I volunteer we go when it's daylight and they're no walking monster tree demons," Dan spoke. Serelia shook her head.

"They're still there in the daylight and were even more at risk when the suns up," she told him. Dan raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms.

"I don't get why," He stated.

"I'll explain," Phil volunteered. "Serelia has moon magic, her and her little wolf friend are pretty much useless at day time,"

"I am not! I just don't do as well as I do at night is all," she said.

"No, you're useless," Litzu agreed with Phil.

"Wait, 'moon magic'? That sounds anticlimactic," Dan exclaimed.

"It's is, its very very lame," Litzu declared. "I'm not just saying that because I hate Serelia either. Her magic is just really dumb.

"Rude~," Serelia sung.

"Serelia can control living things and set up magic barriers, but only when the moon is out," Phil explained. "She also has a weird thing where she can talk to wolves."

"Ah, coolio," Dan replied, looking at Serelia. She didn't seem all that special, despite the fact that she looked pretty scary with her weird eye color.

"'Coolio'?" Phil eyed Dan, looking confused and slightly like he was judging Dan.

"What?" He asked. Phil shook his head and held his hands up.

"Nothin', you do you, boo," Phil said.

"Flirt on your own time guys!" Serelia snapped. Dan rolled his eyes but directed his attention from Phil back to Serelia. "Okay, so we need to get travel at night, any objections?"

"Nope," Dan said.

"No," Phil agreed.

"Hey who made you the leader?!" Litzu whined. Dan glared at her but said nothing.

"I'm the leader, any objections?" Serelia asked.

"Nope," Dan said.

"No," Phil agreed again.

"Democracy is messed up," Litzu muttered under her breath. Dan caught Phil's eye to see they were shining with amusement and it looked like he was having a hard time keeping a straight face.

The wolf sleeping in the corner sneezed and it made Dan jump. He blushed and crawled out of the bed. "Wow, our fearless prince, jumping at a little puppy sneeze," Phil teased.

"Shut up," Dan stood next to Phil and stretched again. He whined slightly at the pain, but it wasn't all that bad. "At least I finally got out of bed."

"True, true," Phil agreed. "I'll try not to sneeze and scare you." Dan slapped him on the arm.

"Are you guys always like this to royals?" He asked rhetorically. Dan wasn't really complaining, the lighthearted conversation and occasional joke were fine by Dan, but they were uncommon and Dan wasn't quite used to it. Most people acted like they had a stick shoved up their buts when they talked to Dan, he never just had a relaxed conversation with them.

"Yeah, we have no morals," Phil smiled and Dan was glad that Phil didn't take offense to his lame little joke.

"This isn't going to work if you guys are going to abandon all strategy talk to flirt every three minutes," Serelia snapped. "Keep in mind little Philly, Dan's practically married."

"Don't put it like that," Dan winced, cringing a little at Serelia's wording. It wasn't a lie, but it still made Dan a little uncomfortable. He wasn't married, or even engaged, yet. He was still technically a free man, even if it was only for a little while. Phil was kind of cute and all, but there was no way Dan could or would pursue a relationship with the man. Unless Phil was okay with having an affair... no, Dan couldn't do that, no matter how cute the boy was. He couldn't bring someone into that mess just for his own gain.

"We weren't flirting," Phil whined. Yeah, Phil really had a one track mind, Dan realized. He didn't even seem to care about the married thing. It was pretty true though, he was pretty much married. He wasn't flirting with Phil, intentionally, but he couldn't help if the boy was kind of attractive and maybe Dan's mind was sort of caught up on that a little. There wasn't anything wrong with it, but Dan couldn't be in a relationship with Phil.

Serelia rolled her eyes but continued to talk about how they were going to get to Troi, "So we need to continue to head north until the break in the trees, then comes the river, we probably don't have to worry about that and we have our little ticket right here," she nodded towards Dan who took a fake bow, not amusing anyone but Phil who covered his laugh with a cough. "Once we get there, Phil, Litzu, and I will get our reward and then we'll be on our way."

"That's a stupid plan," Litzu said. "What if they through us in the dungeon because they think we hurt princey boy here?" She asked, wrapping an arm around Dan's shoulders. Dan saw Phil shift in the corner of his vision but didn't pay much attention.

"They won't do that," Dan pipped, "not without reason, unless one of you is a convicted criminal?" It was more of a question than an explanation.

"Okay change of plans," Serelia said. "Phil will take Dan to the castle and I'll stay as far away from that glorified hole in the ground of torture as possible."

"Umm... yeah okay," Phil didn't really look like he was listening, he was starring at where Litzu had her arm on Dan. Why was he doing that? There had to be a reason, right? Jealousy was the only reason to come to Dan's mind. No, Dan scolded himself, he needed to get the idea of he and Phil being anything out of his head.

"Okay, um, Litzu, you can let go of me now," Dan said awkwardly, trying to wiggle out of her grasp. The realization that Phil was starring at them because of something like that made Dan uncomfortable. He didn't want Phil's gaze on him anymore, it was making him self conscious for no reason.

"Fine~," She sung. She didn't just let go of Dan like a normal person would of though, no. Instead, she pushed him into Phil, who let out a squeak as Dan slammed into him. They landed on the ground with a thud. Dan's face flushed as he noticed he was practically sitting on Phil. Then he realized that for some reason, Phil had his on Dan's hips. Okay, that was worse. (A/N don ac li u dun lik it danyul) Okay, maybe it was better. (A/N buttr&u bttr thank me l8r bc u luved it)

"Uh-I-um... sorry, are you okay?" Dan asked sheepishly. Phil smiled up at him and when he finally spoke amusement laced his voice.

"Oh wow Dan at least buy me dinner first," Phil teased, or was that flirting? No, it was teasing right? Just a joke. Then he winked. Dan might of had a heart attack just then.

"Uh-I-I'll get up," Dan squeaked. Phil nodded and took his hands off of Dan's waist. Dan got off of Phil and offered his hand to help Phil up, who gladly accepted.

"Litzu! We're trying to get them to stop trying to get in each other's pants, that's not how you get them to stop, idiot!" Serelia chided, slapping Litzu on the arm. Dan adjusted his hair, hands fidgeting for something to do.

"We're not-never mind I forgot to care," Phil said, rolling his eyes. Dan nodded his head in agreement though his face was still warm with embarrassment.

"So, on to more important matters," Serelia started. "We should rest today and then set out tonight, yeah?"

"Yeah," Dan and Phil said in unison. (A/N haha they're so married, NERDS)

"Sure," Litzu agreed for once. "Daniel, I'll give you some herbs to help you sleep. Come," she gestured with her hand for Dan to follow her and walked off. Dan eyed Phil like 'should I go or..?' Phil shrugged, so Dan decided to go. What's the worst that could happen? Okay, maybe there were some bad things that could happen, like homicide, or genocide. Maybe omnicide, which really wouldn't be all that bad if you thought about it, humans were terrible.

"Okay, so, where are we goin'?" Dan asked, trying to look and act casual. His breath kind of hitched in his throat a little, where was this weird healing lady taking him? What if she killed him? Or raped him? Okay, that was a bit much, Dan doubted that she would rape him.

"Shut up and wrap a blanket around yourself," she ordered. "We're going outside." Wow okay she was very very dominant, the rape thing was starting to sound more and more realistic. Dan obliged and walked over to grab a blanket. He mouthed "save me" to Phil as he did so, who just giggled and waved 'goodbye' to Dan. Dan rolled his eyes, trying to look annoyed, but ended up just smiling in amusement.

"Stop flirting," Serelia growled. Dan rolled his eyes again, but his smile was gone. He disliked Serelia more and more the more she did these things. He heard the growl of her wolf as if it was agreeing with its master. Dan wrapped it around him, painfully aware of the fact that everyone was starring at him.

Serelia started a conversation with Phil as Dan walked away, but Dan was aware that Phil never took his eyes off of Dan as he walked away. He would of made a little show of over exaggerating his hip movements, but he was trying to not flit with Phil. He didn't really want to either, well, maybe a little. He still didn't wave his hips though because if Serelia saw him she might make her wolf eat him. It was a stupid thought but Dan wouldn't put it past the woman, she seemed to really dislike Dan. A dark thought flew into Dan's brain. What if Serelia was... jealous? No, Dan didn't have time to overthink Serelia being a brat, it was probably just her personality anyway.

"Earth to Daniel," Litzu's voice shook Dan from his thoughts. Was she talking  to Dan? Oh no, how much had she said?

"Er, what?" Dan stuttered. Litzu rolled her eyes and grabbed Dan's hand, pulling him out the already opened door. Uh, when did she open that? Dan still felt Phil's gaze as he walked out of the cabin. What was his problem? "So what do you need me for?" Dan struggled to keep his blanket on with his left hand as his right hand was kind of... in use.

"Not yet," She said, still holding Dan's hand. He wished she'd let go. He wished he could think of something other than glimmering blue eyes and dark fringe. The worst thing though was that he was starting to wish he didn't have to marry that princess. She was probably rude, she probably wasn't even remotely kind. Phil though-no. No thinking of Phil. "Get out of my head," Dan wanted to scream. He'd never felt like this before, he'd never fallen so quick. It wasn't love though, was it? No.

As a child, Dan never heard the phrase "I love you." Not to him, not exchanged between his parents, never. He knew people threw it around too much though, and he wasn't about to do that. He felt goosebumps when Phil's blue eyes met his brown ones, thinking of the boy made his heart jump into his throat, and the idea of just touching the boy made Dan's stomach knot and his cheeks burn, but it wasn't love. He didn't know that emotion and throwing it around wasn't something that excited him in the slightest. Love didn't sound... fun. The idea of you're entire life revolving around one person... that was terrifying. Relationships scared Dan even more, because love didn't hold a relationship together. Love wasn't enough, you needed more than that. What if Dan didn't have more than love? What if he didn't even have love?

A cold hand slapped Dan's face, making him jump. He realized that Litzu wasn't holding onto his hand anymore so he took the opportunity to hug his blanket closer because wow it was cold. Small flakes of frozen water drifted down from the sky, dancing to the ground slowly to join the other snow that still littered the forest floor.

"What the h-" Litzu cut him off. Ugh, he hated that. It was rude, and Dan wasn't used to being treated like that. His cheek burned from the contact and his mouth hung slightly ajar in shock.

"You need to stop thinking about Phil for five minutes to listen to me," Litzu hissed. Dan closed his mouth growled lowly in the back of is throat, but he kept his mouth shut, physically biting his tongue to keep from snapping. "That girls no good, the king's daughter, I mean."

"What do you mean?" Dan spat. He was curious, but what good was Litzu's word anyway? Dan knew little to nothing about the woman. For all he knew she was just about to kill him.

"She's just no good, she'll tear you up, that is if you make it to Troi alive," she told Dan, who was still skeptical. Dan was just about to ask another question when an arrow went flying right past his ear, hitting the tree behind him. Warmth trickled down his neck from his ear as he realized what just happened. An arrow was shot at him and it nicked his ear.

"Get down!" Someone yelled. Dan didn't though, he couldn't move. Was that Litzu that yelled that? No, it was a male's voice. It was familiar voice though, who was it?

Pressure. Pressure on Dan's chest and he fell to the ground on his back, the air escaped his lungs in a puff. Growling. Growling filled Dan's ears. Grey. Grey fur clouded Dan's vision.

Then he realized what had saved him. Serelia's familiar. He heard yelling in the distance, but it was a loud blur of sounds, all mixing together. He couldn't distinguish a single word. What was happening? The snow was cold, Dan was tired. Sleep... sleep sounded good. Dan was going to sleep.

Once again, Dan passed out.

---

He woke up on the soft bed in Litzy's house, warm blankets piled on top of him. His eyes fluttered open and everything was a blur, wow those lights were bright. He blinked a few times to try and focus his vision. He felt like he had a hangover, and Dan knew what that felt like. Dan was a lightweight and got drunk on half a glass of wine, so hangovers were normal for Dan.

"Hey, Dan," A soft voice cooed. It was a nice voice, Dan liked that voice. He liked the person it belonged to as well. Dan was so focused on the voice he didn't realize that it called him 'Dan'. Not Daniel, Dan. Or that they were alone. All he cared about was how Phil was sitting next to Dan's bed and how Dan liked his voice.

"M'I like your voice," Dan slurred. He felt like he was drunk and hungover at the same time. Yeah, that was a better way to describe it. Phil laughed. "M'like your laugh too."

"Litzu said that the herbs would make you tipsy, I didn't think she meant drunk out of your mind," Phil said, smiling. Dan liked his smile too. Dan liked his eyes. Dan liked his hair. Dan liked his everything.

"Noooo, I'm not drunk," Dan whined. "Don't say that." Dan pushed the blankets off of him. "Too hot."

"I hope Serelia and Litzu get back soon I have no idea what to do with you," Phil thought out loud. Dan sat up and just looked at Phil. Just admired him. Wow, he was pretty. Very very pretty. Phil bit his lip nervously under Dan's gaze, and oh freaking wow that was hot. It took all Dan had to not attack Phil right then and kiss him. Luckily Dan had some self control, even being slightly intoxicated. Dan broke the awkward eye contact though and looked away from Phil, at the wall behind him. Get a grip Dan, he thought to himself, get some self contr- his thought was cut off as pale thin lips pressed a kiss to his mouth.

Phil.

Phil was kissing Dan.

What?

The kiss was quick and shy though so as soon as it started it stopped. Dan didn't even have a chance to think, let alone kiss back. Dan wasn't very happy with that. A little peck that he didn't even react to.

"I-I'm sorry I shouldn't of-" Dan cut Phil off but returning the kiss, but with one actually worth something. Seriously, Phil's kiss was kind of pathetic. Any normal person wouldn't be happy with that, right? It wasn't weird that Dan felt a pull, urging him to press his mouth to Phil's. Dan's eyes fluttered closed as soon and he put his lips to Phil's.

Dan put a hand on Phil's neck, pressing himself closer to the blue eyed boy. Phil didn't miss a beat and kissed back without hesitation. Did he want this just as much as Dan did? Phil set a hand on Dan's side, then he moved it to Dan's lower back. He pushed Dan closed and Dan wasn't about to complain. His senses were on fire and everything in him craved Phil, wanted him closer. The wanting was so strong it hurt. It was a hunger for Phil that was burning in his chest, tearing him to pieces. Phil's other hand sat on Dan's left side, a gentle gesture that sent chills down Dan's spine.

Someone behind Phil cleared their throat and Dan and Phil sprang away from each other, faces burning a bright crimson. Dan looked up to see Serelia standing there, purple hood sitting on her head and snow dotting her clothing and hair. Her grey eyes blazed with something Dan couldn't read and her lips were pursed. Litzu stood next to her, smiling like an idiot. The wolf was sitting at their feet, also covered in snow.

"We leave you alone for five minutes," Serelia hisses, words sharp as daggers. Litzu clapped her hands together excitedly and took a breath to speak but Serelia shot her a glare and Litzu clamped her mouth shut.

"Um-I-Wait are you two a-oh my-I'm a terrible person," Dan stumbled over his words. Did he just ruin a relationship?

"No but Serelia thinks we are," Phil's voice was stone cold, which was new to Dan. He hasn't heard Phil talk this way before, he wasn't going to lie, it was hot.

"What do you mean 'thinks'?" Dan questioned. He felt stupid all of the sudden. He didn't get the whole relationship thing. Were they together or not..?

"Oh I'm sorry, I meant wishes," Phil growled, not taking his eyes off of Serelia, who was starring at Dan, eyes unforgiving and cold.

"I do not," Serelia spat back. "I hope you two are happy together with your little royal affair." She stormed out of the cabin, wolf dead on her trial.

"It's not an affair since I'm not married yet," Dan muttered under his breath, watching Serelia as she had her little fit.

"Don't mind her," Litzu sung. "Welcome to the I-kissed-Serelia's-boy-toy-so-now-she-hates-me club!"

"Is-the-uh-um, boy toy?" Dan raised his eye brows at Phil who was now looking at Dan since Serelia left. Phil shook his head 'no' immediately, somehow understanding what Dan meant. Dan was still kind of loopy from the herbs.

"She tried pretty flippin' hard but no, no way. Never," He insisted. "M'A little gay, no girls for me thank you very much," Dan snorted a little laugh at this, he wasn't sure why but he found it funny.

"I really don't want to marry that stupid princess, whatever her name is," Phil opened his mouth as if he was going to say her name but he kept it shut and let Dan finish. "It was kind of sad, really, I just gave up. I didn't care that I was being forced to some snobby princess that I didn't love. Isn't that pathetic?"

"I wouldn't say it's pathetic," Phil said. He eyed Dan's hand like he was going to hold it, but he ended up not even giving it a second glance. Maybe he didn't care about Dan in the same way Dan did him, but Dan didn't mind. He'd gotten the guy to kiss him, that's got to be more points than getting his hand held.

"I would," Litzu piped in. Phil shot her a glare and she put her hands up in defeat. "Right, lovey dovey happily ever after fairytale moment, gotcha."

"I really don't want to marry her," Dan repeated. Phil gave him a look of sympathy. His eyes trailed back to Dan's hand but he didn't touch it. Okay, now the little looks were starting to annoy Dan. "If you don't just grab my hand right now I swear I'm going to marry that brat of a princess just so I can throw you in the dungeon."

"M'sorry you're into bondage, hm? That's good to know," Phil teased but grabbed Dan's hand nevertheless. Dan's face flushed and he slapped Phil's arm with his free hand. "BDSM too?"

"Phil!" Dan yelped sheepishly.

"Wow aren't you vocal? Also good to know," Phil continued. At this point Dan was redder than a tomato and Litzu was laughing so hard in the background Dan thought she might wet herself. Phil giggled and his tongue poked out of his mouth as he did so. Wow that was hot. "Sorry I'll stop."

"Good," Dan sighed. Phil bit his lip and and knew that it was to keep himself from making a sexual joke. Dan just rolled his eyes and Phil bit his lip harder. "Wow how dirty is your mind?"

"You don't want to know," Phil shook his head, laughing to himself. "Well if you play your cards right you might find out for yourself someday," Dan blushed deeper and hid his face in his hand. "Wow you're such a bottom."

"And you're such a pain in the ass," Dan muttered. "Don't comment on that I just got it." He said when he looked up to see Phil struggling to hold in a laugh.

"So, are you guys up for running away from royal guards for... Well the rest of your lives?" Litzu pipped up, looking out the window. "Because it looks like you might have to, well, we might have to."

Dan and Phil made eye contact and smiled a little. "I'm down, what about you?" Dan asked.

"Well I mean I'm up," Phil winked and Dan face palmed.

"Do the innuendos ever stop?" He asked, laughing a little.

"Nope," Phil's smile was from ear to ear and he looked so so happy. Dan smiled as well.

"Good,"

"That was better than any stupid marriage vows any church could of made up," Phil chirpped.

"Isn't it a big early for marriage?"

"Says the gay prince who was just about to get married to some rude princess and didn't care," Phil quipped.

"Fair enough," Dan giggled.

And they lived happily ever after, running away from guards and making inappropriate jokes.

THE END

[justjessame]

Diamonds Are A Boy’s Best Friend Chapter 2

I’d come to Miami days away from the new year. My father, smiling so deeply I felt certain his face might just burst from the effort, told me we’d be celebrating at the Miramar. Frank Sinatra. Glitz. Glamour. Even Lily looked excited, and she rarely showed emotion over anything, that I’d noticed so far.

“What shall I wear?” I asked, knowing that for now, my expert fashion sense needed help. I nearly fainted when she practically squealed at the idea of taking me shopping. Dear Lord. “Shopping? In Miami?” I would rather die in a puddle of my own piss, I thought, but went along when I saw that it was as my father wished. Fine. Why not?

I was dragged through so many stores that I lost count. I was forced into a makeup chair so some woman could do my colors, and then another could tease my hair into some form of style that terrified me, until Lily came to my rescue and told them ‘subtle’ over and over.

By the time we left, I had a black floor length gown that seemed to shimmer in the sun. The slit was a bit much, but the heels were lovely. Silk stockings with a gorgeous black back seam, and jewelry that my father had gifted me over the years would complete the look. My long hair was pulled back and clipped, waves brushing my shoulders. And the make up was subtle, but far more than I’d ever worn before. I chose elbow length gloves, my large diamond bracelet (what other stones would my father allow to grace my being?) settled carefully on one wrist. The matching necklace tight against my throat. Red lips, dark eyes, and I looked, if Lily was to be believed gorgeous.

“I must be the luckiest bastard in Miami, with the two of you on my arms.” My father’s crudeness could be excused, I supposed, since it seemed to be a compliment. I realized that Lily was like a mirror image to me. White instead of black. She looked lovely, and I told her so.

“Thank you, Liz.” I almost corrected her, but decided it didn’t matter. Since we’d spent the day together, she’d earned it.

“Liz?” My father shot me a calculating look. “I like it. Like Liz Taylor.” Ah, of course, the movie star. “You have her coloring, well aside from your eyes.” Yes, my eyes, not violet, but emerald green. “You do look beautiful, sweetheart.”

We drove to the hotel in semi-silence. My father only broke it to let me know that he’d known that I’d been there before because he’d had me followed. I started to protest, but he reminded me of his reputation. “I can’t have an enemy attack you because of me, Liz.” He was still working his way around my nickname. I felt oddly comforted by his worry, but deep down I knew he just didn’t want the distraction that could come from my harm.

Once at the hotel, he exited the car first, offering his arm to Lily, then the other to me. Getting out in the dress was a bit of a challenge, but I managed, thankful that she went first. Lights were as blinding as the sun, and flashes everywhere. Damn it. Cameras? Of course, I reminded myself, Frank Sinatra was probably the tip of the iceberg.

“Smile, darling,” my father’s lips barely moved with the order, and I complied. “Perfect.” That word was going to get old very fast.

We walked slowly inside, and I relished the chill of the air inside. Heavenly. I allowed myself to be put through the paces. Introductions. Faces and names I’d struggle for days to recall. Champagne. The dimness of the dining room. The sound of music. And then Lily wasn’t by my side. I looked around, trying to catch a glimpse of the one person I could count as a friend. Nowhere that I could see.

“Problem, sweetheart?” My father asked, trying to find what I was searching for clearly. Not wanting to draw undue attention to Lily’s absence, I smiled shyly.

“The ladies?” I asked, and a voice behind me answered.

“Allow me, Miss Diamond.” I turned and realized that Ike had somehow ended up behind me.

“Isaac.” My father offered. “Would you be a lad and show my daughter the way?” His eyes were shrewd. Clearly a test of some sort, but for whom?

“Of course, Ben.” He offered me his arm, and I took it carefully. Suddenly aware of the flash of a wedding band on his left ring finger. Ah, a test for me. “Let me show you to the powder room.”

“Thank you, Mr. Evans.” I easily kept up with him, since he once again shortened his stride to fit mine. “I’m sorry, I’m taking you away from your wife.” I mentioned as we wove through other guests. “If you’ll simply point the way-”

“That wouldn’t be very hospitable, Liz.” His smile brought out his dimples and I shook my head. “My wife and family is quite used to me taking care of hotel business during events.”

Hotel business? Well that put me in perspective. I bit my lip, careful of the red paint, and walked silently beside him. I grew confused as we passed the lobby, as he walked me further inward, and then we were inside an office.

“This doesn’t look like a ladies’ room.” I said, glancing around. It was his office. It practically screamed his name, and I hardly knew him.

His chuckle made me realize that I’d been lost inside my own head. “Yeah, I thought you might like the privacy of,” he moved to a door and opened it. “A single.”

“Thank you again, Mr. Evans.” I moved toward the doorway, but stopped when he stepped in front of me. Looking up, I could see how dark his eyes had grown and swallowed hard.

“Don’t mention it, Liz.” Ah, a reminder that my father wasn’t beside us. “You look beautiful tonight.”

“Thank you, Ike.” I slipped past him and shut the door, but could still smell the musk of his cologne and the scent of cigars. I took a moment to take a breath and fix my make up. My lipstick reapplied, my eyes free of smudge, I washed my hands and opened the door to find him seated behind his desk. “Is this the scene of a man lording over his domain?”

Ike looked up and it seemed like he was drinking in the very image of me. I grew embarrassed and started for the office door, thinking he could work and I could return to the party. His hand on my arm stopped me. “Liz.” I felt like my breathing was coming in gasps, and I knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt that turning and looking at him would cause something that neither of us would see as less than shameful.

“I should head back, before Father sends someone to find me.” The warning was clear. Off limits, just like you. I could feel the heat of him and it took every single bit of my strength to walk out the door. “Thank you for the use of your-” I stopped, and glanced at him leaning against the doorway. “Thank you, Ike.” And then I walked as fast as I could without ruining the facade of good breeding all the way back to the party.

“You look flushed,” my father offered, Lily returned and seated on his left. He had a hand on her neck and he looked suspicious. Of me? Or her?

“I didn’t want to miss Sinatra.” I offered, carefully taking my seat as a waiter held it for me. “There was a line.”

He nodded, and I realized he was studying Lily’s neck. Oh, he was suspicious of her. We rang in the new year with Frank Sinatra, and I tried not to look for Ike. To see him kiss his wife. To see his eyes meet mine across the room. To feel the burn of want mixed with shame. I lied to myself and said that it didn’t matter. That Ike Evans was off limits and so was I.