#yes hindi natry

[nice2meetyouu]

Let's have a cup of coffee?

[marizaddon]

I’m on my 26th and these past months have been testing me so hard. I’m currently on my healing journey from a 3-year relationship. Some would say, “ 3 years lang yan, madali lang yan kalimutan”… but they don’t know how that relationship brought me some of the happiest moments I had experienced in this lifetime. Yes, there were fights but no relationship is perfect. Never assume that a relationship will always be filled with good moments. As long as both of you are willing to change for the better, arguments are inevitable.

We were happy.

We loved having food trips. Actually we started having dates sa turo-turo. Fishball, tokneneng, takoyaki basta kahit ano. Magjijeep lang kami papunta sa bayan kasi takot pa siya noon magmotor dahil he was once engaged in a motor accident but eventually nagmotor na siya ulit so mas marami na kaming napuntahan na kainan na malapit lang samin. We also tried resto pero may natry kami na mahal na resto and we ended up in regret kasi di namin natripan parehas, nagbiruan pa kami na sana sa mura nalang kami kumain HAHA Our last foodtrip was during our third anniversary in a Japanese Resto and parehas naman namin nagustuhan but little did I know that that would be the last.

I really do love travelling kaya mas naging memorable yung travels nung may kasama nako and nakakatuwa na he invited me to join their travel sa Davao nung May 2022. That trip was full of laughters with his co-workers. After that trip, we planned to go to Thailand. But this year, I’ll be going there without him. Part of his message during my birthday last June 2022 was for us to have more travels together but that will never be possible again.

I’m an opacarophile. I love watching sunsets and being simply at the beach. During the first sunset I watched after we broke up and all the hidden lies came out, I had this hard feeling of watching my favorite view. The vibe there was different because I’ve imagined myself watching sunsets with him for the rest of our lives. Weeks before everything happened, lagi ko siyang kinukulit na magdagat naman kami kasi yun yung isa na nagpapatanggal ng stress ko sa work but di nangyari kasi lagi siyang wala and lately lumabas na kaya ganun kasi nga may nangyayari na behind my back.

Until Feb 2023, I started to make new memories on places we’ve been. I get to appreciate the sunset more even without him beside me. I tend to make myself more productive at work, meet my friends, and bond with my family. Kasi ngayon ko narerealize, naset aside ko lahat yun nung kami kasi masiyado kong binuhos yung sarili ko samin.

Now that I’m on my healing journey, I want to be at my best or just be better than my past. I’m really thankful sa support system ko kasi hindi nila ko iniwan at pinabayaan. I’ll make sure na makakabawi din ako sakanila 🤍

[myunspokentrvths]

Nakakalungkot na marami akong nakikitang comments na kasalanan raw ng examinees kung bakit 15.25% lang ang passing rate. Sa estudyante na daw mismo kasi entry level lang daw yung board exam, hindi pa naipasa. Try niyo po kaya🙄

I tell you po. Mahirap magtapos ng kursong Accountancy. Qualifying exams plus magmaintain pa ng grades.

Mahirap din po mg review. Additional gastos in the middle of pandemic. Kahit October na nga, wala pa ring kasiguradohan kung matutuloy. Eto pa, nauna pa nga ang isang review center mag announce kesa sa BOA at PRC. I don't have anything against the RC pero sana kung may decision na pala, make an official announcement agad.

Actual board grabe yung stress. Nakamask at face sheild. D pwede mg phone while sa break. Pwede pa sana mag last cram review pangdagdag kompyansa sa next subject kaso bawal. Yun na yata pinakamahabang 2 hours sa mga araw na yun. Tapos sa exam, parang ang bilis ng 3 hours. 😂😂 maraming individual questions tapos mahaba na solution kelangan. Napapatanong tuloy ako kung natry ba nang examiners e take yung exam na yun within 3hours, pero yun nga ok lang kung nasa syllabus kaso iba outdated. Sana may quality check naman. Marami kasing errors. Yung isang subject tinake mo pero may nahalong questions sa ibang subject. 😂 May panunumpa na question. Maling attached na tax return. Yung may CREATE na nga pero may mga tanong na year 2017-18. Sabi nga ng reviewer namin - walang maling question sa actual kaya try to think like the examiner. Okaay pero mahirap kayang laging kami ang nag aadjust.😂

Yung TOS, lagi naman hindi na fofollow. Pero sana at least e try din na e follow or wag nalang mag issue at the first place. Okay na yung syllabus lang pero sana ay updated din yung questions. Yun lang.

Gusto ko lang sabihin na hindi wholly kasalanan ng examinees kung bakit ganun ang resulta. Yes may pagkukulang na willing at kayang e improve. Pero sana be compassionate sa 2,367 brave souls! Kung disappointed kayo sa result, how much more kami na maraming isinantabi pra sa CPA license.

Ulitin ko din po, try niyo e take yung CPALE mismo at sabihin niyo po uli kung pang entry level lang yun. Kakagigil mga palakang to 🙄

PS. Isa ako sa 361 pero madami akong kakilalang matatalino, masisipag at competent sa kanilang field na hindi nakasama. License pa lang meron ako at walang experience pero sila years of experience na. Kaya wag kayong echosera sa mga nag exam! Baka maging boss niyo rin yan sila, ma who you kayo!😂😂

[pinaasang-umasa]

tagged by: @mamamoshrek and @louisgaslitt

Here are the rules:

Always post the rules,

Answer the questions of the person who tagged you and don’t forget to thank them,

Write 11 new questions,

Make your own banner, and

Tag 11 people and link them to the post.

AJ’s Questions

1. Do you believe in the presence of a Parallel Universe?

actually, mas naintindihan ko lang yung idea ng Parallel Universe dahil kay Clara Benin, but wala talaga akong idea ron before. then here comes her song, and maybe there is talaga. hoping na sa kabilang universe we’re far way happier and better than what we are now.

2. If you could go back in time, would there be anything that you would want to change?

maybe i would change my mindset. i’ve been used to be so competitive sa lahat ng bagay and i always make it to the point na i’m dealing with others standards. siguro kung umpisa palang eh lowkey na ako, hindi siguro ako aabot sa ganitong thinking about life and acads and everything.

3. If you were given the chance to wield Thor’s Hammer, who would you smash first with it?

DDS MAMI AND U-KNOW-WHO!!! char not char hahahaha pero kasi nakagagalit lang talaga and wala akong ibang maisip na may deserve ng pefect smash aside sa kanila.

4. Would you change your name if you’d have the chance? if yes, what would it be?

no, kasi satisfied naman na ako sa tracey kasi medyo hindi common (madalas nga lang mali sa spelling but izzokay naman)

5. What is/are your comfort food?

red velvet and matcha!!!!!!!

6. What would you do if you were given invisibility powers?

siguro magtra-travel ako around the world kasi syempre libre yown. tapos magpapaka-fangirl ako sa mga concerts, pupunta ako sa backstage or sa mga bahay nila HAHAHHAHAH ang creepy pero kasi naman chance ko na yown tapos wala pang gastos.

7. If you were given the chance to learn a new language, what would it be?

korean para kapag nag-sokor ako (using my invisibility powers stated above) hindi ko na kailangan ng subtitle para maintindihan sila HAHAHHAHAHA zzz

8. If you were to be reborn to another nationality, what would you choose? (could be mixed e.g., half german, half shepherd)

wait, bwesit napaisip ako kung aso ba ako o tao. HAHAHAHHAHA half-korean siguro para naman ma-fulfill ko dreams ko kahit sa ganitong tanungan lang HAHAHAHAH

9. Describe your ideal date.

my ideal date could be sa concert grounds siguro or sa isang mellow-gig sa jess & pat’s or kahit saan basta may gig ng indie bands, tapos chill lang kayo, jamming with all those beautiful love songs. hindi ko na kasi masabing ideal date yung sa concert ng LANY kasi i already experienced it tapos hindi naman kami nung kasama ko pero soon jks HAHAHA

10. Is there someone you look up to? If you were given a chance to ask them any question provided that they answer you with all honesty, what would it be?

there’s no specific person na gusto kong matanong, but i really look up to those registered Civil Engineers and ask them how they made it kahit na ang hirap hirap. don’t wanna sound dramatic pero grabe, idol ko silang lahat lalo na pag laude or topnotchers. gusto kong magpatapak!!!

11. If you were given $1,000,000,000,000,000,000 now, what would you pay for first? (e.g., PH debt 2020)

andami masyado, sige pambayad nalang ng utang ng pinas. kapag may sumobra at hindi nakurakot, tsaka ko na babayaran utang namin HAHAHAHA jks

Kamil’s Questions:

1. Is there an icon you aspire to be like?

albert einstein tayo!! ano pa bang mahihiling mo sa sobrang talino niya tapos lahat prinoblema niya na hanggang ngayon prblema ko parin yung iba. ARGGHH!!!

2. What is the cheesiest/most romantic stunt you’ve ever pulled up on someone?

hinayaan kong matulog sa tabi ko yung crush ko kahit hindi ko alam kung crush din ba niya ako? HAHAHAHHAAH omg. tsaka natry ko rin gumawa ng box na puro letters tapos iniwan ko sa bag ng crush ko. (wala akong naging jowa sakanila AASHGSYG)

3. Which house do you belong to in Hogwarts?

GRYFFINDOR!!!!!!!!

4. If you end up in jail, what would be your crime?

pagbatikos siguro sa gobyerno lalo na sa sitwasyon natin ngayown huhu

5. If you had to name yourself now, what would it be?

still tracey siguro kahit hindi ko alam kung paano ko maiisip yon, pero stick tayo sa tracey hahaha

6. What tv show or book do you want to be in?

if a tv show, i would like to be a part of ELITE or any kdrama hehe. if a book, i want to be in a hundred and one reasons!!!

7. Who would play you in a movie about your life?

i want Ester Exposito!!!!!

8. What would you like to be known for?

that i’m a Registered Civil Engineer!!! ARGHHHH

9. What is the first thing people notice about you?

my speaking voice and how i interact with other people. they find me friendly and makapal yung mukha kasi talaga HAHAHAHHA

10. What’s the quickest way to your heart?

just make me laugh, madali akong ma-fall mami.. ZZZ

11. Do you collect anything?

any keroppi or cartoonish-frog!!! i have almost 100+ na gamit na frog yung design AHEHEEHZ

My questions:

1. When is the last time you experienced nostalgia?

2. What’s the scariest dream you’ve ever had?

3. What’s the weirdest thought you’ve ever had?

4. What animal would you want to be reincarnated as?

5. If you could visit one planet, which would it be?

6. What super power do you wish you had?

7. What’s your very first memory?

8. What did say as a kid when asked: What do you want to be when you grow up?

9. What country do you most want to travel to?

10. Which foreign language would you like to learn?

11. What’s the most ticklish spot on your body?

Tagging: @alwaysthesleepy @solaceinbetween @jillaxkalangg @thewrittencupofsolana​ @klang-y​ @carminology​ @made-by-nonsensical-creature​ @jawanalife​ @celestialmoonbae​ @wholeheartedlycat​ @qtmiming​

[keepgoingmerry]

hi, t.

ayon, im an unofficially official sup. haha potaena kinakabahan ako. feeling ko hindi ko keri? likas sa mga leo ang maging bibo kid pero never ko pa natry mag-lead talaga. pwede ko ba maconsider yung thesis? hahahahaha taena ako nga may pinakamababang grade don kahit ako leader 🙃 (taena mo mam di kita malilimutan)

i mean.. hay hahahahaha yes, i appreciate and am super grateful for the promotion pero natatakot me huhu feeling ko di ko talaga keri 🥺 baka ibagsak pa ko sa eval ng ittrain ko, kasi sist, wala talaga ang prufisyunalism sakin ☹️ tapos mas bata pa ko ng 1 decade??? potangina 🙂 feel ko talaga hindi ako gagalangin hahahahahaha 😂 tas iniisip ko pano pa ko magtuturo, e hindi ko nga maintindihan ung tinuturo sakin ngayon ☹️ tangina talaga 😅 3 months palang, tas talon agad sa sup role. super thankful pero super pressured din potahena 🙃

pero syimfre, kahit na ganon, di naman ibibigay to kung hindi kaya… hay. natatakot lang talaga me. jusq. Lord, kayo na po talaga bahala sa lahat. kung ano pong trip nyo for me, G.

hays, 6 months. let’s see kung ano ang matitira—- official or unofficial?

[movingalexandrea]

How are you Alexandrea? Its been 5 Years ! Fucking 5 Years Girl! Damn , Buhay kapa? after ka kainin ng depression 5 years ago. So proud of you.

So how are you now?

Ito ako in my perception nagbago nako hindi nako marupok, hindi nako malambot , feeling ko minsan bato na ngako eh , ito hindi basta basta eenter sa relasyon, ito malandi pa sa malandi sa hindi ko inaasahan lahat na ata natry kona sa mundo (tangina kasi ng tinder) and i don’t need judgement of people. Im just saying my facts base from my story.

Ito mas strong nako dati ako minimura ngayon ako na nagmumura hahaha. Dati Oo lang ako ng oo ngayon natuto nako lumaban kasi narealize ko minsan nalang ako kukuda sisiguraduhin kong tama ako. Mas naging positibo ang pagiisip ko dahil sa kaisipang maari akong mamatay anytime (ganun talaga ko magisip ) hindi yun sa pagiging negative,  i just wanna cherish every moment kasi di natin masabi kung hanggang kailan ba talaga tayo sa mundo. Madaming namamatay ng walang sakit inaatake sa puso , so kung mangyari man yon atleast naenjoy ko buhay ko.

Mas kumonti ang kaibigan ko, yes yes Im happy kasi mas nakikita ko sino ang tunay na kaibigan at sino lang ang dapat kaibiganin. Im so happy i see myself improving in selecting people, who will be a good friend, who will help mo to grow, who will correct me and be there through thin and needy. 

Mas natuto ako makipaglaro sa mga taong pumapasok sa buhay ko , Im not saying I always play game pero marunong ako magbalance sa mga lalaking alam kong lalandiin lang ako, at katawan lang habol sakin , ako pinapasan sa tadhana yung lovelife ko, ayoko naman kasi iforce , gusto ko lang hayaan kung ano lalabas sa tawas ok ako don. 

Good Point “ In life we dont rush and force something let it be natural.”

Kung kaibigan,landi,fubu or friends with benefits yang inoffer wag mong  ipupush to be a relaitonship. Im not saying makontento tayo don ang sinasabi ko lang nasa sayo if gusto mo itake yung chance or hindi pero wag mo ifoforce. Base from my experience mali ang napupuntahan ko kasi finoforce ko for relationship.

Now I meet guys , with no expectation. Go lang labas lang landi lang,go lang sa kung saan mapunta kasi duon mo siya makilala eh. Duon mo masasabi if jive ugali niyo. 

Good Point “Always be open for all possibilities” 

if you guys start at fling, fubu ,fwb or friend tuloy mo lang malay mo posible pala maging kayo talaga , hindi man ok lang at least diba naging connected kayo.

Kaya ako patuloy lang sa buhay  ,go lang ng go. I love to experience as much as possible , to learn as much as possible and to grow more for who i am before now and in the future.

Chances will always be there its up to us if we will take it or just leave it there.

Good Point “ Guys wala sa itsura yan promise! I date alot of handsome guy ,wala talaga sa itsura promise”

So now my focus is to be a rich woman char, hahahah but i really wanna have my own real estate kahit hindi bahay. Gusto ko lang makita ko pera ko personally di yung nasa bank lang.

Find a job who will compensate me better , na mas maggrogrow pako and learn new things.

I can do this, we can do this , lets solve it and be happy :)

[callmerescue]

61 to 69 pls

61: have you ever watched someone masturbate?Yes. HAHA

62: has anyone ever watched you masturbate?Yes. HAHA

63. Have you ever had an erection and someone noticed?Yes. HAHAHA

64. What is your method of masturbation? (ie. toys, clitorial, prostate)Normal? HAHAHAHAHA

65. What is your bra/penis size?Hindi ko pa natry sukatin. HAHAHAHA

66. What is the strangest thing you have ever put up your vagina/anus?Wala naman. HAHA

67. When was the last time you masturbated?Kahapon? HAHAHA

68. When was the last time you had sex?Medyo matagal na. HAHA I’m in a bit of a dry spell. HAHA

69. When was the last time you watched porn?Kahapon? HAHAHA

[joezhelle]

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[quilline]

bes

Main event agad: CAN A GUY AND A GIRL BFF REL WORK WITHOUT ANYONE FALLING INLOVE??

Yes I have a guy BFF and syempre lagi kami naiissue kasi sobrang close talaga namin. It was in college palang since we got this strong bond. Gano ka strong?

1. Lagi kaming tambay sa kung saan after classes na kaming dalwa lang. Sobrang click namin kasi nagkakasundo kami sa halos lahat ng bagay. Tipong trip ko, trip niya and vice versa. And even though there may be differences, we'd still be open to try because  masaya yung isa dun eh kahit na minsan ang weird or sadyang di mo lang din ganun katrip.

2. Syempre like any other bffs naman relate dito yung tipong no words needed kahit tinginan lang alam mo na. You know each other so well tipong pwede mo siyang ipang-order sa restaurant, ibili ng pabango, ipamili ng sapatos kasi alam mo taste niya. Given na din syempre na alam mo yung buong plot ng buhay niya hahaha

3. No awkwardness. We can share utensils. We can be physically close altho hindi yung hhww type. Ocassional hugs lang siguro like pag may major life events ganon haha. Minsan din yung susubuan mo kasi meron ka gusto ipatikim ganon. We can sit together in silence and feel perfectly fine. We can even sleep side by side and that's totally fine.

4. Partners-in-crime. Matic na to hahaha tipong kung anu-anong kalokohan na yung napasok niyo dahil sa impluwensya ng isa't isa. Madami kaming first na natry together and madami pa din kaming gustong gawin. We even have a list.  Sempre di rin mawawala meme-tagging dyan saka yung random messages na wala namang katuturan. Pati sendan ng pictures at selfie na sobrang highly confidential in a way na magkakagiyera pag nagleak hahaha but strictly no nudes k? haha

5. You go on to each other in tough times, and no one lets the other one down at these times. Mula sa gutom na ako hanggang sa ayoko ng mabuhay sa kanya mo irarant. Yung pag may nagsabi na ng ganun to the rescue na din yung isa by bringing food to reminding you all of the reasons to live.

For me yes, he's important to the point na madedepress talaga ako if we split apart  but I see it as platonic love. Walang sparks o kilig eh. Masaya lang talaga in a way na naeenjoy ko yung company niya ng sobra and on the other hand I feel free to be myself. There's no need for me to act out to impress him. Nafefeel ko naman din ganun siya sakin.

Alam din namin na we are not each other's type. We even talk about our crushes and so the more. Like him asking for advices and help para manligaw at ako naman I had a boyfriend din and he knows everything about it. He was even there nung first ako pinakilala ng ex ko sa magulang niya kasi hiya ako pumunta mag-isa hahaha

But lately it's been confusing me because I read about something na  (nv) meron at merong mafafall sa ganyang bff effect basta parang it won't stay the same na magkaibigan kayo forever. Osyempre nakulayan ko na agad, if I'm not the one inlove, could he be? COULD HE BE? OR it's actually possible that he also just see me as a friend for as long as time?

And surprisingly, I find myself asking that. I mean, should I even be bothered? I think I'm just so curious. I'm wondering how would I handle that.

[balib0listang-iniwan]

@rig0 - Syempre unang una ‘to sa lahat bukod sa cute to mabait talaga sya. De ano kahit puro kakupalan tinuturo nito sakin, mahal ko yan hahahahaha. Di ko alam kung paano kami nagkausap nito eh pero unang usap namin, bait na nya sakin agad. Atsaka ano aminin na nating lahat na kung di mo kilala ang isang Rigo aakalain mo talagang napakataray nyan, ganyan din ako sa kanya dati eh pero kapag nakausap mo at kapag nagkasundo kayo, puro kakupalan nalang gagawin nyo. Kaya para sakin 10/10 to hahahahaa punyeta?? parang exam lang hahahaha pero putangina mo sana pinapadala mo na yung singkwenta ko no, isang daan na to boi haha labyu

@svperfar @zakkterol0gy @jemjeremjemjem @martyrkuno @kleffrmrz @orangejeuz @juantonudels - Yes yes hahahaha sorry na agad na ang dami nila. Ayan kasi ang mga barkada ko at para sa akin mga pogi mga ‘to. Hindi dahil barkada ko sila pero dahil nakasama ko na yang mga yan at alam ko na ang babait nila. Sila yung tipo ng tao na mga clingy, kapag nagkikita kita kami, yakap agad sa isa’t isa na akala mo mga hindi nag-uusap. Tapos kapag uwian na, iyakan na ops di pala sila yung naiyak sina Dette at Jane pala yon hahaha. Parang mga kuya ko yang mga yan at oo pangalawa kasi ako sa pinakabata sa amin. I miss you bois!! Bigyan nyo naman kami ng time hahahaha char

@thedaggerxx @lou-ke @thehungerjames @walangusername - yes yes nakasali sila ih char hahahahaha de sobrang importante sakin ng mga taong ‘to. Sila yung mga kaibigan na kahit hindi madalas nakakausap, hindi nababago yung pagkakaibigan. Sa madaling sabi, kapag nakausap mo ulit, puro kakupalan pa din mapapagkwentuhan nyo. Kaya para sa akin pogi tong mga ‘to kahit hindi naman. HAHAHAHAHA labyu mga pre tsaka mehn

@mryosolalaki - Hindi ko pa talaga nakikita muka nito eh pero tropa ko din ‘to. Nagkakausap kami nito. Yan madalas ko nasasabihan ng problema ko. Naalala ko yan kausap ko nung down na down ako sa buhay ko like tangina sabi ko ba naman try namin minsan bigti kasi di ko pa natry tangina ko diba nangdamay pa ako pero ayon okay naman na. Tsaka ano gusto kong pigilan to sa gagawin nyang pagdedeact amp. Pero all in all, pasado sa akin to. Lalo yung mga sulat nyang mapanakit pero may kwenta. Ang witty eh. Well, Witty is the new pogi luh hahahahaha.

@irrelevantkaloy - Ito talaga ang gwapo aaaaaa puta?? crush ko ‘to dati eh hahahahahhaha lalang share ko lang. Miss u mamsh mwa. Miss ko na din si @carapherneliaaaa qt qt nito eh luv ko kayo 💚

Oo punyeta ako na di maalam magbilang hahahahhahahaha hirap kaya mamili huhu pero ano follow mo sila anon matutuwa ka sa kanila promise

sinong top 5 gwapong bloggers para sayo at bakit sila

kung sino nalang maglike nito sila nalang mga gwapo o ps hahahahaha de teka mag-iisip ako madami akong time eh tapos na midterm exams yi

[untiringmom]

My Work-from-home Journey

At 2017, I started looking on how to earn money online while using my phone. Sabihin na natin lahat ng mga palaro ni bitcoin dati nasalihan ko na pati pagka captcha pero hindi ito sapat para makatulong sa gastusin namin sa bahay. 

Until one day kakahanap ko ng mga jobs online nakita ko sa facebook ang isang community group about moms that are working from home so ayun nag join ako. And sobrang nakakainspire yung mga stories nila about how they started working from home and nagbasa basa ako sa group kung ano mga site na legit na pwedeng pag applyan.

Ayun nga dahil excited ako, gumawa ako agad ng accounts sa mga site na yun pero nag focus ako sa onlinejobsph. At nag apply apply kahit wala akong idea sa mga jobs na inapplyan ko. May mga nagreply naman kaya lang mostly doon need na may computer ka. Nag try ako, nagpunta ako sa computer shop at doon ko ginawa ang test para mahire ako pero wala eeh, di na ulit nag reply yung client. Sumuko ako at di na nagpatuloy sa pag apply ulit. 

In 2018, my husband's Aunt visited and gave him an iphone. So ayun naalala ko yung sinabi nung friend ko na yung cousin nya ay nagwowork from home din and may client sya na ang pinapagawa lang sa kanya is maglike and comment sa post nung idol nya sa Instagram pero dapat yung phone na gamit is iphone.

I applied again sa mga job posts sa onlinejobsph about Instagram or managing social media accounts. Swerte naman at may nagreply. Instagram commenter yung job post. So ayun interview, discussing the job role. They gave me a script para sa eko comment q. I will handle 4 of their Instagram accounts. Every 30 minutes I will exchange accounts to comment and there's a quota/day. Napa wow aq sa salary kasi $100/week. My shift starts at 8am and ends at 5pm PH time. So I accepted the job and I have a 1 week trial. Next day is my first day sa job. The client gave me a quota of 100 comments/day. I thought it was an easy job and of course no hassle, kasi phone lang gagamitin so I can still do my role as a mother. 

But, it wasn't easy. On my 4th day, I still haven't reach the quota/day and my client chatted me and sabi nya na bad news kasi magkoclose na daw yung company so he will not continue my job and he will send me the salary after. I don't know if matutuwa ba ako kasi para hindi ako masaktan sinabi nya na magkoclose yung company pero alam ko naman na hindi ako na hire at hindi ako fit sa job kasi hindi ako nakakareach sa quota. 

I moved on and prayed to God that hopefully someone will hire me.

After a few days, I received an email asking if I am still available for a job that she will offer. She leaves her contact details so we can talk about the job. In my mind shouting "Thank you Lord".

The job is easy for me. I will send DMs on Instagram. And I manage 10 accounts. And each account has a different account to dm.

After a few weeks, my client wants to hire another for her company to grow. So she asked me if I have friends that are interested. And I ask my friends but they are not interested. So i recommend my husband, she told me she will ask his son if it's okay with him. 

The next day, she said she will hire my husband as a part timer. If he's good she will make it full time. After a week she's amaze with my husband's work so she made it full time.

Days, weeks, and months passed by my husband and I decided to renovate our house. Sa totoo lang yun talaga dream ko kaya ako naghahanap talaga ng trabaho. 

Yung bahay kasi namin is tabla yung dingding at yung bubong naman is a nipa hut. At tuwing uulan pumapasok ang tubig sa loob ng bahay kasi yung semento ng sahig is hindi na pantay. Sa sahig lang din kami natutulog kaya kapag malakas ang ulan expected na mababasa na naman yung higaan. Malaki naman bahay nung lola nung husband ko at may kwarto kami doon kaya lang mas maganda kasi kapag nakabukod. Hahaha. 

Hindi agad kami nakapagrenovate kasi hindi daw maganda magpagawa ng bahay sa katapusan ng taon. So yung budget namin na pangrenovate is nilagay na muna namin sa bangko para pagdating ng sunod na taon makakapagsimula kami agad.

So ayun na nga nagsimula na ang taon makakapagparenovate na kami. Excited na ako kasi matutupad na yung dream ko na magkaroon kami ng maayos na bahay. At August 2019 natapos na din sa wakas so nagpahouse blessing kami.

Next na project is a laptop. Nag upskill ako. Nag aral ako para pandagdag kaalaman kasi madami ng freelancer ngayon so para hindi ako mapag iwanan, sasabay ako sa agos. 

Nung nagkapandemic nahinto yung work namin ng husband ko sa client na yun. Nag apply ako ng nag apply, sa onlinejobsph pa din. At yun nahire ako as a Virtual Assistant, dropshipping company. Easy lang naman kasi may training naman every time na may ibang tasks na ipapagawa. Kaya lang graveyard shift at mababa lang ang sahod.

Okay naman sakin kasi pandagdag experience at nakakaenjoy naman yung work kasi madami ka matututunan kaya lang nakakastress si client. Super! Di ko alam if ano lahi nya hindi sya american. 

Kaya naghanap ako iba work. Nag apply apply and sinabayan ko ng prayers. Madami akong natry, naging inbound caller, tagahanap ng influencer sa Instagram pero di rin nagtagal. Still working pa din naman dun sa nakakastress na client habang wala pang matinong job na nakikita. 

Moving forward may inapplyan ako na $400/month na Virtual Assistant and thank God nagreply agad and then interview. Part time and flexible yung time kaya pwede ako magwork as long as hindi mako conflict yung time namin nung kachange shift ko. 

Nagwowork pa din ako dun sa dropshipping company. I start my part time job from 7pm to 9pm. Then, from 10pm to 7am sa dropshipping company naman. Tapos work ulit sa part time at 7am to 9am. Okay naman yung sched ko kaya lang sobrang stress na ako sa graveyard shift ko dahil sa client. 

Kaya kinapalan ko mukha ko at kinausap ko yung client ko sa part time and ask if pwede ba ako mag full time sa kanya and he said yes and I will start my full time sa kanya next week.

Nag resign ako sa dropshipping job, hindi nya din binigay yung 15 days work ko na salary. At first kinulit ko sya sa chat para ibigay nya yung sahod ko pero galit ata sya kasi nagresign ako and wala kaming kontrata kaya nag move on na ako. And that time din nakabalik ako sa first client ko yung sa Instagram, kinuwento ng husband ko yung nangyari at sobrang bait nya kasi sya nalang daw magbigay nung dapat na sahod ko dun sa dropshipping. Kaya naka move on ako agad.

Kaya ako nakabalik don kasi hindi ko pinastop yung husband ko sa pagmemessage sa mga Instagram accounts kahit walang sahod. And nagmessage sya sakin kasi tumaas daw yung sales tapos sinabi ko sa kanya na yung husband ko ay hindi nagstop magmessage. Kaya yun nagsasahod sya every week pero unlike before na yung sahod. Naiintindihan ko naman, malaki ang utang na loob namin sa client na yun kasi sya ang dahilan kung ano ang meron kami ngayon kaya ang hirap nya bitawan kahit magwork kami ng walang kapalit. 

Pero nastop din yung work namin sa kanya dahil sa bagong update ng Instagram na dahilan na hindi na kami makapagsend ng message sa halos lahat ng accounts. At busy na din ako dahil sa modules ng dalawang anak ko. Kaya nag give up na din ako sa work na yun.

Pero nagwowork pa din ako dun sa isang work hanggang ngayon at pinagpapasalamat ko lahat ng iyon sa Panginoon.

I tried applying jobs sa upwork and may work ako 5-10 hours a week minsan wala pero okay na din kahit papano.

I am thankful and very blessed kahit may pandemic may trabaho pa din ako. Kaya wag ka pong mawalan ng pag asa. Try and try pa din sa pag apply dahil darating din ang time na makakahanap ka din ng job na para sayo. 

Natutunan ko din na wag mag stick lang sa iisang client para kahit mawalan ng job sa isa meron pa tayong maasahan sa isa pa or dalawa. Hihihi.

Thank you for reading and God bless! 

[sighsandfrissons]

The Day You Said Goodbye

Hi Cheri, tagal na natin di naguusap, hahaha. Kasalanan ko yun. Ako yung huling hindi nagreply sa chat natin. Siguro I was hoping na ikaw yung unang magpaparamdam ulit, para lang kahit papano sign yun na may gusto ka din sakin, or namimiss mo ko, o kaya kung “attached” ka talaga sakin. Ewan.

Anyway, kung ayaw mo masaktan wag mo na ituloy yung pagbabasa ng message na to, tungkol sakin at sa feelings ko tong message na to. Never ko pang natry gumawa ng ganito so I won’t be holding back.

Yung last two times na nagkita tayo were devastating for me. Obviously yung isa dun yung time na tinanong kita kung tayo ba, tapos sinabe mo hinde. Hindi ako nasaktan dun sa sagot mo na yun eh, I was hoping na oo yung sasabihin mo pero I was also expecting na hindi yung isasagot mo. Nasaktan ako sa sagot mo nung tinanong kita kung gusto mo ba ko. Sinabi mo “attached” ka sakin. Ang ganda pakinggan nung una, attached. Wow. Parang ang deep. Parang positive pa nga yung dating nung word na yun eh. Siguro para sayo, you meant well nung naisip mong isagot yun. Nung time na yun I was kinda relieved pa nga. Best case, you could have said yes, gusto mo din ako. Worst case, hindi talaga. Attached was an answer that was in between yes and no, but more closer to yes, diba? So yun, relieved ako. Pero bakit twing naaalala ko yung sagot mo na yun, I get sadder each time. After a while narealize ko kung bakit. Kasi sobrang paasa nung sagot mo na yun. It wasn’t a no, but it definitely wasn’t a yes. Hindi ka pa ba sure sa kung anong nararamdaman mo para sakin? Ang tagal na nating magkakilala. Kung gano katagal na tayong magkakilala, ganun katagal na rin kitang gusto. Tapos ikaw di ka pa sure? Attached? Attached ka sa nagkakagusto sayo pero hindi necessarily na gusto mo rin siya? Ang paasa nang dating diba? Ewan ko, para sakin ang paasa ng dating. Mas naguluhan lang ako. Ang hirap mainterpret nung sagot mo. Baka naman mali lang din interpretation ko sa sagot mo. Pero kasalanan mo na yun if ever mali nga interpretation ko. Sana inayos mo man lang yung sagot mo, yung hindi kung ano ano pwede kong maisip.

Ayun, dami ko nang sinabi, iisang ganap pa lang yun. Naalala mo yung pinagawa mo sakin? Yung parang kailangan sagutin ko muna kung bakit ikaw yung nagustuhan ko? Parang may pinapalista ka pa nga sakin nun eh. Sorry pero wala akong maalala dun sa mga pinapagawa mo sakin. Nung time na yun medyo marami na kong iniisip nun. I remember feeling offended, you were asking me for answers to your questions like I was taking an exam. Kailangan ko isa isahin yung mga bagay na nagustuhan ko sayo? I remember na nangheram ka pa ng pen sakin nun tapos nagdu doodle ka sa tissue habang naguusap tayo nun. Tapos habang naguusap tayo, you were making gestures with the pen. Habang  iniisa isa mo yung mga bagay na dapat kong sagutin, you were making these imaginary bullet points. Ewan ko ba. It felt more like na ini-interview mo ko kasi nagaapply akong boyfriend. Sobrang off sakin nun. Sa dinami dami ng kakilala kong magjowa, wala sa kanila yung dumaan sa ganun. Tapos ako gusto mong patunayan yung feelings ko sayo like I’m answering an exam or applying for a job. Sorry, pero sana man lang inayos mo. Medyo nakakababa ng pagkatao yun.

So yeah, hindi naman ako nadevastate agad after natin magkita nun. It happened slowly. I get a bit sadder and sadder each time that I would think about it.

I said na last two times na magkita tayo yung devastating para sakin diba? Well, yung last time kasi, it just felt like napipilitan ka na lang magpakita. Maybe pagod ka or something. Di ko alam. I wanted to make that day fun for you. I tried making that day fun for you. Pero why did it feel na parang wala ka masyadong gana nun? Why did it feel na parang half the time we spent together, uwing uwi ka na? Siguro nga pagod ka lang. It was depressing for me kasi it felt like napipilitan ka na lang pumayag pag nagaaya ako na magkita tayo. Siguro kasi hassle nga sayo. Yung time na nagkita tayo, sana ipinahinga mo na lang. It made sense. Masakit isipin, pero kasi may sense.

Ayun, so at that point, I started asking myself kung ano ba ko sayo. Sinabe mo dati na special ako sayo. Ang ganda pakinggan. Nung sinabi mo sakin yun I felt hopeful. Pero why does being special to you make me feel so empty? Why does it make me feel na parang backup plan mo lang ako? Parang yung sa attached lang yan eh, parang pinapaasa lang din ako. Keeping me close enough, but not too close. Yung tipong pag wala ka nang choice, edi ako na lang.

I wanted you to know na seryoso ako nung sinabi ko na gusto kita. Ikaw lang yung gusto kong ligawan, ikaw lang yung gusto kong idate, ikaw lang yung gusto ko maging girlfriend. I’ll admit na I was so confident na if ever maging tayo, hindi na kita papakawalan, papakasalan kita. Hahaha, tangina ang stupid eh no?

So ngayon ilang buwan na rin tayo hindi naguusap. Maybe hindi talaga ako ganun kaspecial para sayo. Maybe sobrang busy mo na sa life mo ngayon na hindi mo man lang napansin na nawala ako. Madaming maybe, pero hanggang dun na lang yun.

Kung umabot ka sa part na to edi ibig sabihin binasa mo yung mga masasakit na sinabi ko. I warned you. To be clear, tungkol sakin pa rin to pati sa feelings ko. If you’re feeling bad then just think of other people na you’ve been a friend to. I think as a friend okay ka naman. And if nakukulangan ka pa, feeling mo hindi enough yung mga nasa taas, wag ka mag alala, marami pa kong di sinasabi, hahahaha.

Ako nagsimula na hindi magparamdam kasi I wanted to prove something. Obviously, ako may kasalanan kung bakit tayo umabot sa ganito. I’m sorry if nasaktan ka sa ginawa ko. Naging mahirap din naman to para sakin. Sobrang daming beses na kitang gustong kausapin, twing may good news, or bad news, or yung talagang namimiss lang kita. Pero I was still waiting for that sign na hindi dumating.

Actually, never naman akong nagset ng deadline ng kung hanggang kelan ko hihintayin na magparamdam ka. But I feel like now is the right time to end this, and whatever we had. Hindi ko alam kung ano dapat sabihin sa mga bagay na ganito, yung kapag ititigil na. Actually kapag tumitigil nga di na ata umaabot sa ganito eh, hahaha. I just felt like you should know na hindi na kita liligawan. I’m probably gonna regret doing this. Mej nagkakaregret na ko while writing this part. Pero kasi, naffeel ko nang hindi na to tama para sakin. I have always liked you. I have liked you for a long time. I liked you so much that it hurts. Pero yun nga, liking you hurts. And I just want to stop hurting. So ayun, good bye.

Our movie nights in Baguio will always be my fondest memory of us. - Tap January 02, 2019 10:36 pm

[katwomann]

ChopStop

Awhile ago, pumunta ako ng SM Calamba para bumili ng pang gift. Tapos yun. Gutom na gutom nako kanina so naghanap ako ng pwedeng makainan. Punong puno ang mga fast food kasi andaming tao since holiday nga today. So naghanap ako sa taas.

Nakita ko nga tong ChopStop. Nung una nag alangan pa ako kasi parang busy din yung nga staff. Eh gutom na nga ako. Pero sinubukan ko pa din naman kasi nga parang maganda tsaka masarap.

So yun, nag order ako nung BBQ Porkchop. May kasama na siyang buttered veggies na side dish at take note: UNLI RICE. Yes! You’ve read it right! UNLI RICE siya. So ang saya ng tummy niyo after for sure. Sa halang 129, may pagkain ka na, unli rice pa. Dagdag ka na lang ng 28 pesos para sa iced tea.

(Yan yung inorder ko kanina. Sarap niya beshy!)

Ang cool lang nung place nila. Tapos tingnan niyo naman to.

Sinong di nakakaalam sa mga taong yan? Ang cute di ba?

And most especially, sinong di mapapakanta sa sign na to:

Di ba cool?

So punta na lang kayo sa 3rd floor ng SM Calamba kung gusto niyong makatikim ng freshly cooked na pagkain. Sulit ang bayad. And uulitin ko, UNLI RICE. Sa mga on diet naman, meron din naman silang menu na hindi unli rice. Madaming pgpipilian.

Merong chicken porkchop, fish, pork. Meron din silang fudge in a mug. Di ko natry kasi medyo busog na din ako kanina. 😂

A must try place 😊👍🏻

[im-batmen]

List to be busy

1. Shooting Range - hindi dahil sa gusto kong barilin sarili ko (which is naisip ko talaga na barilin sarili ko while im trying to do this) gusto ko lang malabas lahat.

2. Sky diving - bawal toh sa akin kasi may HB (yes sabi ni doc nung nagpacheck up ako kaya ayoko magpacheck up kasi may madidiskubre lang na bawal kaso si boss kasi required daw😂 ayun my pinabibili na gamot pero dahil pasaway c luko alam nio na 😂) i want to try this feeling ko naman kakayanin ko gusto ko isigaw lahat sa pagtalon ko sa eroplano feeling ko mapapaos ako dito haha wag sana mabingi yung mag gguide sa akin lol

3. Walwal sa bar alone - yung tipong malalasing ka ng sobra tapos mag isa kalang

4. Weed - eto talaga. Yung gusto ko matikman lahat ng flavor yung high kalang yun wala kang iisipin na kahit ano

5. Bumili ng Vape - mas malalagyan daw kasi ng flavor na maria kung eto ang gamit. Plus need ko din to kasi im so fucking stress and depress need ko toh para hindi ko xa maisip (wala na naman magagalit oldo yeah smoker naman talaga ako dati napabago lang dahil nag ka gf pero dahil wala na naman back to old me)

6. Matulog sa forest na alone kalang - natry ko na to sa newport news park and yeah nilamon ka talaga ng dilim pero nakakapagrelax xa (medyo risky c luko kac unsafe) pero cool naman xa challenging kaya haha try ko naman sa my falls or sa bandang caroline

Last magdrive ng malayo malayong malayo. Pag hindi pa naging busy nito 😂

[specialsum1]

Too much food will kill you

Oct. 20, 2017, Friday.

Late na naman ako nakatulog kagabi so late na naman ako nagising. Pero in fairness, it’s earlier than the past few days. Mga 10 am na instead of 11 or 12. Haha

Late na ako nagising so tinamad na rin ako pumunta ng school (pupunta kasi dapat ako. Hehe) and the weather is still for thugs. Lol. Nakakatamad talaga weather these days. Namimiss ko na si haring araw. Kailangan na maglaba. From burol, bundok na ang labahin. Mauubos na rin damit ko sa drawer. Huhu

Unlike the past days na natutulog ako uli, chineck ko agad watch ko para makita kung anong oras na and mamotivate na bumangon kahit papano. Effective naman sya. This is a very good and interesting discovery. Haha. Di na ‘ko natulog uli. Bangon na agad after thanking God through prayer for another day in my life. Then, diretso CR. Ihi and gargle lang. Linis lang ng mata if may muta, ganern. Sayang kasi sa water and sabon eh maliligo rin naman na ako after other rituals ko.

Pagkalabas ng CR, fixed my bed then stretch konti. (Di na ‘ko nakakapag-exercise gaya ng dati. Huhu) Suklay. (This is also helpful, guys, para magising na brain cells sa umaga.) Then, inom ng water, 1-2 glasses. Then, kain ng mga 3 slices ng bread for not-so-breakfast (brunch rather).

Hanap motivation sa life. Isip kung ano gagawin for the rest of the day when I remembered na manlilibre pala si Merielle today dahil birthday nya nung Tuesday.

So, naghintay na ‘ko ng update sa plano. Kung tuloy ba o hindi, ganern.

Kaya inopen ko laptop ko ‘coz lapa naman phone ko. Online sa fb habang nanonood ng kung anu-ano sa youtube. And nagmessage na nga si Joanna. Yay!

Kaya ginanahan na ‘ko maligo. Hahaha

After maligo, light makeup. Y’know, moisturizer, pulbo and kilay lang, ganern. Ah. Lip balm pa pala.

Pero ang mumsh Merielle nyo, bibyahe pa palang pala! Nakakalurks. Nasa hometown pala nya and late na bibyahe. Kalurks. So late na sya nakarating ditey. Marami tuloy sa’ming magffriends ang di nakasama. Actually, kaming dalwa na lang and si Jer ang natuloy sa korean resto.

Tagal ni mumsh Jer magprepare, mga mumsh. Ginutom ako sa paghihintay kaya kumain muna ako ng mga 2 slices of tinapay. Dapat talaga may stock kami ng food dito. Kawawa ang sexy bodies namin ni Georgia. Di kami kumakain ng matino pag walang pasok. Tsk.

Nag-cancel pa ‘ko sa supposed to be biglaang movie bonding namin ng Bitch Friends tapos di lang pala matutuloy itey?

Muntik na, mga mumsh. Alanganing oras na kasi dumating ang VIP, mga mumsh. Mga 6pm na halos. Traffic kasi and umuulan ng malakas. Uuwi pa si Arven sa Poland. Umuwi na rin si Patty and Tope. Tapos ang Joanna naman, late na nagpaalam kaya di na pinayagan. Nagpaalam kay mama nya kung kelan super rain na. Psh. Tatamarin na rin sana ako kaso may dala daw si mumsh Merielle na muffins and nasayangan din ako sa effort nya. Lam nyo yun, sya na nga may birthday, sumuong pa sya sa bagyo makapanglibre lang, wala na nga akong gift tapos di pa ako sasama? Di ba, pangit naman kung papabebe pa ‘ko dahil lang tinatamad na ako.

Kaya gora na lang akezz. Dumaan naman sa bhouse si Jer para sabay na raw kami. Chika ng konti about SGE movie, etc. Natraffic saglit sa may bandang terminal kung kelan malapit na kami sa destination. Hays.

And yes, mga mumsh, nauna pa kami sa meeting place kaysa kay mumsh Merielle. Okay lang naman. Chika ulit. Then, dumating na si mumshiee. Naka-miniskirt ang mumshie nyo. Uh-huh.

Umupo na kami dun sa mababang table na naka-indian sit ka ganun (yung korean/japanese style). Kung ano man yun. Katamad na mag-google. Mawawala na naman ako sa momentum.

Epic pa dahil pinalipat kami ng table dahil short daw sila sa staff kaya di pa malilinis yung table na una naming inoccupy.

Nakakaloka ang usok, mga mumsh. Sumakit mata ko. Di ata okay ventilation system nila. And konti rin ng dishes na available sa menu nila unlike dun sa unang korean resto kong natry but lumipat na sa kabilang province.

Okay naman yung food. Libre eh. Haha. Yung ambiance, so-so lang rin. Mas masarap yung ramyeon sa Oppa’s. Weird ng bowl nila. Nagaevaporate yung sabaw. Haha. Parang pancit canton na yung dating kay mumsh Merielle pero naubos nya.

Epic ng pagkakaluto ni Jer ng samgyupsal. Nakalimutan nya gamitin yung garlic and something paste. Pati yung itlog ni Jer, epic fail. Haha

So pang-4 persons yung inorder namin plus 2 additional na ramyeon with egg. Isa lang kasi free nung set na inorder namin. Spicy yung samgyupsal saka chicken.

Chika about kpop and idols. Naubos naman namin yung samgyupsal na specialty ni Jer. Okay naman yung kimchi. Di na ‘ko masyadong na-eew unlike the first time. Pero fave ko talaga sa side dishes yung flavored cucumber ba yun? Basta, lasang pipino na may soy sauce and other pampalasa. Masarap din yung samgyupsal when you eat it properly. Pero naloka din talaga ako, mga mumsh, sa chopsticks. Stainless kasi and pasmado aketch. So dumudulas and matagal na rin since last kong kain sa korean resto. Pero pinanindigan ko, mga mumsh. Nagpaka-trying hard ako. Haha

Fiesta talaga. More for us talaga ang naganap.

Di na kinaya ni Jer ubusin yung ramyeon nya. Ako rin, di ko na kinaya. Nakakasawa sa dami. And mej soggy na yung noodles. Di lang talaga ata ako fan ng noodles. Pero naubos ni mumsh Merielle yung kanya kasi yun yung una nyang kinain pero di na nya nakaya yung pang-2nd nya sanang cup of rice.

Wait, there’s more. Nag-dessert pa kami. Klk. Kinain pa rin namin yung muffins na dala ni mumshie. Then, chocolate pa. Huhu. Talk about PG. Hahaha

Maglalalakad-lakad pa sana kami sa mall kaso lang sarado na pala. Sobrang tagal namin kumain. Huhu. Kahiya, mumshies.

Nahirapan pa kami makasakay sa jeep dahil nasa alanganing place yung mall. So lakad galore ang tatlong mumshies. May mga dumadaan ngang jeep pero puno naman or iba ang byahe.

And on our way, may mga big revelations! Nagkabistuhan na. Nagwattpad din pala ang mga mumshies. Haha. Relieved the jeje days.

Nung sa may terminal na kami, wala pa ring jeep. Huhuness. So tinuloy-tuloy na namin paglalakad hanggang sa may highway. And kumain ng tig-iisa pang muffin.

“Kainin na natin yung muffins ni Merielle.” -Jer

Haha. Nagbabalik-loob na ba si mumsh Jer dahil interested na sya sa muffin ni mumsh Merielle? (Ating alamin sa susunod na kabanata...)

“Sooo wrong in so many levels 😂”

Pero di pa kami nagpaawat, mga mumsh. Pumunta pa kami ng K-mart at bumili pa rin. Yamanar ng mga mumsh. Di ko na napansin binili ni mumsh Merielle. Basta, bumili ako ng ice cream sandwich for us ni mumsh Georgia. Nagpa-takeout nga pala sya ng ramyeon with egg.

Yung ice cream na parang nasa juice pack sana bibilhin ko, mga mumsh. Basta, yung madalas nating mapanood sa mga kdrama. Yung parang ice candy, ganern. Ice cream in a straw? Kaso ang mahal, mga mumsh. P75 rin gaya ng ice cream sandwich. Eh alangan namang magshare kami dun ni mumsh Georgia, di ba? Edi dalwa dapat bilhin ko eh wala na akezz monarkiya ‘coz bumili nga akezz ng takeout nya kaya dun na lang sa Samanco. P75 pero pwedeng share na lang us. Smart ko, di ba? Haha. Charaught

And ito na nga, mga mumsh. Pagkadating ng bhouse, kumain na si mumsh Georgia. Minadali ko nga sya kasi baka matunaw na yung ice cream sandwich. Buti naman, hindi agad natunaw and naubos na nya ramyeon nya na naging pancit canton rin. Haha. Ba’t kaya ganun? Gawa ba sa sponge yung noodles?

Naubos ni mumsh Georgia yung ramyeon nya. Ginutom rin sa wakas.

But me, mumshies. Akala ko, okay lang ako. But no. Hindi ko kinaya, mga mumshies. Nasuka aketch. Minessage ko nga before may vomit sesh si mumsh Jer.

Nakakaloka, mga mumsh. Sobrang nabusog ako. Di ko kinaya. Halos di na ‘ko makahinga. ‘kala ko, mamatay na ‘ko. Huhu. After ko uminom ng kape thinking that it’d help and relieve what I’m feeling. Nag-CR ako to loosen up. Di umepek. Nasuka ang mumshie nyo sa sink. Huhu. Pero konti lang naman, mga mumsh. Haha. Parang yung kape and konting ice cream sandwich lang sinuka ko. (oops, tmi. Haha)

So yeah, mumshies. Too much of a good thing is a bad thing talaga. Nabigla ata tyan ko dahil light meals lang ako maghapon tapos biglang fumiesta ng dinner. 

Nasira ang diet ko, mga mumsh. Yung ilang weeks kong pinaghirapan, nabalewala lang ng isang gabi. Haha. Back to old tyan me. Welcome back to my stress and beer belly. (Buti na lang 1 layer lang sya, mga mumsh) Huhu. 

Diet na uli ako bukas.

Note to self: Hinay-hinay lagi sa pagkain kahit pa masarap lalo na kapag libre.

[heyligaya]

Best shot

UP Fair 2014

I got my trusty Bart with me (DSLR). I wasn’t really enjoying the crowd but it was fun taking pictures of people. An old habit of mine I guess? Everyone was having a great time and Im just walking around looking and taking photos randomly. The music was lit! I laid down my scarf and sat on maybe the only spot in Sunken Garden that had the worst view.

“May kuha kang maganda?”

turned my head to the left and I saw a couple mingling around and to my right, a guy holding an Avocado shake was looking at my camera.

“Nakita kita naglalakad kanina sa kabilang dulo”

and out of courtesy..

- Meron naman, kaso wala akong makuhang magandang shots eh..“

which I thought was a dead end conversation so I continue taking pictures.

"Mas maganda yung spot sa baba. Dun oh.. (pointing to where a crowd of people are either jumping or looking like they’re about to start a fist fight)”

and to my blank expression..

- Ahh ganun ba? baka nga siguro. Okay lang naman ako dito, may gusto lang akong kunan na 1 shot.

and he immidiately replied “okay lang ba kung pwede kong tignan?”

- Sure sure

As he scrolls my pictures, my anxious self is telling me that he might be judging me right now..

“Uy! pwede! Maganda ah! Ano bang shot ang hinahanap mo?”

- “Hindi ko rin alam eh. Siguro kapag nakuha ko na dun ko masasabi.”

“Oh..(gives me back my camera) thank you. Karl nga pala”

- “Jul".

“Sige, enjoy the concert! Maingay pero good memories”

- Sige sige. Nice meeting you"

grabbed my camera and started taking pictures again on the same spot which I think is probably the only spot I’ll be in since my aching feet couldn’t handle all the walking. Not to mention that I was lucky enough to get that spot with that amount of crowd, and on my right I heard..

“JUUULL!!!, gusto mo fishball?”

With the doubt of leaving THE ONLY SPOT I got after hours of walking looking for one, plus I barely ate anything that day. I stood up. I didn’t respond. Walked towards Karl and continue walking through a street full of different food variations. Thank goodness all of them are cheap.

“Music.”

Yes. I heard him but, i pretend I didn’t hear.

“Ikaw?”

- Ha?“

"Music major, ikaw?”

- Ahh.. Fine Arts. Pero short course lang actually

“Gaano ka na katagal nagt'take ng pictures?”

Well, at first I didn’t understand where the conversation was going because I was looking at the food, either I’m going for Shawarma or Calamares.

- Hindi. Hindi ako photographer. Luma na nga to eh. Hobby ko lang magtake ng pictures

“Maganda ah! Okay nga eh. Pursue mo!”

- Ayoko, mahal eh pero sige tignan natin. After ng classes ko dito

At this time, I was questioning myself if why did I stand up in that spot. Instead of taking pictures, I ended up walking again to look for food. My mood changed after 10 minutes of walking.

“Ano ba gagawin mo after classes mo?”

-Magwowork? Life..“

"Ahhhhhh tama tama”

- Actually, graduate ako ng Psychology kaso.. di ko alam if gusto ko ipursue Fine Arts eh. Ayaw ng parents ko.

“Try mo! You’ll never know unless you try..”

Paused for a moment there. I literally stopped walking. I glanced over some gooooooood fruit shakes and cheap street food.

- Parang pagkain yan eh, paano ko malalaman kung gusto ko ng fishball? or dynamite? Parehas na masarap pero, paano ko malalaman kung ano mas masarap kung hindi ko titikman parehas diba?“

"Dun ako sa fishball. Sa dynamite, di mo alam kung sobrang anghang or walang lasa”

I stared with my popular dumbfounded expression on his response and I was thinking “Seryoso ba siya?”

- Ayos! Sige, dun ka sa fishball. Ako sa dynamite

He laughed with a proud proud look on his face

“Okay! Sinabihan kita ah”

- Malaman ko kapag natry ko na

Away we go with more walking with Mango shake on my left hand and 6 pieces of Dynamite on my right. He didn’t buy anything. We continue walking down the oval and probably walked a complete 3 rounds. Talking about experiences inside campus and the genre of music we listen to. I don’t even know his last name and he didn’t know mine either. He might have noticed that I was starting to walk slowly because of the hours of walking around and he decided to look for a spot. This guy must have his guardian angel beside him as he found a BENCH, an EMPTY bench available. Do you know how hard it was to get a bench in a UP Concert!?. So I shared my scarf. Enjoyed the music. Last song. Last few minutes before the event ends.

- Oh aminin mo, mas masarap yung dynamite kaysa sa fishball

“Teka teka! Hindi ko sinabing hindi masarap. Ang sakin lang, hindi yan yung best choice para pagkagastusan”

- No regrets! Okay naman parehas eh.

We started asking deeper questions like “Anong tingin mo sa buhay?”. Cliche as it may sound but he responded with probably one of the wisest answers. I asked him if why he didn’t take Philosophy instead and he just laughed.

- Sana yung pagdecide kasing dali lang ng pagpili sa Fishball at dynamite no?

“Wait! Sa gitna ng fishball at dynamite mo kukunin yung inspiration mo sa life decisions?”

He got some humor too..

- Syempre hindi! Ang sakin lang, diba? Oh! dalawa lang choices mo. Wala nang ibang criteria. Wala nang sasabihin yung iba. Ikaw lang talaga. Kung ano gusto mo

“Wow drama!”

- Ay sorry! *laughed hysterically

“Okay lang! Bagay na bagay nga yung mga tanong mo sa concert oh diba? Okay lang yan. Maraming madrama sa mundo. Lahat yan iba iba”

- Di ko alam. Di kami close eh"

“Pahiram akong camera”

He started taking pictures randomly. 3 photos to be exact.

He showed me a picture of a man first drinking I don’t know what.

“Oh tignan mo to.. Ang saya niya diba? Law student yan pero gusto niya talaga mag Fine Arts. Gusto niya magtayo ng studio sa may Katipunan.”

Then he showed me a picture of 2 young lovers holding hands.

“Oh eto, love birds. 6 years na sila. Gusto na nung lalaki magpakasal, pero hindi pa nasasabi nung babae na aalis na siya and nagkaroon siya ng offer sa America”

Then lastly, he showed me a picture of a girl who seems to be looking for something or someone and I said..

- Siya naman, kakagraduate niya lang pero di pa siya ready sa life. Alam niya kung ano gusto niya kaso natatakot siya kasi feeling niya wala pa siyang experience

“Ang drama mo nanaman! Alam mo, life is short pero ikaw naman ang magt'take ng journey na yun. Ang dami pang oras. Basta alam mo sa sarili mo kung ano kaya mong gawin”

- Di mo kilala yung mga yan no?

He smiled and just said “Muka bang kilala ko?”

He gave me my camera back and just watched over how the people started to go on and walk to different directions. Crowd slowly fading. Surroundings got calmer.

“Alam mo, lahat naman ng tao iba iba. Lahat yan may kanya kanyang desisyon”

- Oh ikaw? San ka?

“Di ko alam. Slowly but surely. Sa ngayon, eto muna. Mga tao. Yung music. Masaya naman kaya dito muna ako.”

- Musician. After mo dito, musician ka na. Meron ka nang advantage sa music na wala sa iba

“Uyyy! pwede!!”

I laughed FIRST which is VERY VERY rare. He stared at me and went back to gazing the slowly diminishing crowd.

“Alam mo feeling ko, ganun talaga. Bibigyan ka ng isang challenge na ikaw lang ang makakasagot. Kumbaga nasasayo na kung paano mo sosolusyunan para makakuha ka ng magandang shot.

He stood up. Stretched for a bit.

"Ang tanong.. ano ba ang best shot?”

And I stood up after.

- Siguro malalaman mo kapag nakita mo na yung best shot.

A pause. Not even an awkard pause. More of a deep sigh kind of pause. Then he asked me

“Hanapin natin?”