#yes he's singing about being some alien president running a planet and having sex and comparing his genitals to a paprika

[queer-crusader]

If you ever wanna hear a genuine song that's like that women are my favourite guy video, here's some Shantel. I recommend listening to this entire album. It's very Balkan Pop from 2007

[laurenthelunatic]

if you’re curious as to what goes on in my head, here’s a few answers

1. Do you ever doubt the existence of others than you? like solipsism? No, I know that the world doesn’t revolve around me and that no one is truly as happy as they claim to be.

2. On a scale of 1-5, how afraid of the dark are you? 0 unless you stick me in a room I can’t leave 3. If you had to name a child whether it be yours or some one else’s what would you choose? If it were a boy, magnus. if it were a girl, I suppose lilith

4. What is your favorite word? schadenfreude

5. If you were a type of tree, what would you be? a weeping willow

6. When you looked in the mirror this morning what was the first thing you thought? bitch, you need some new contacts because you’re looking fuzzy!

7. What shirt are you wearing? my friend johnny’s old worn out system of a down shirt

8. What do you label yourself as? a petite nut case

9. Bright room or dark room? dark room with string lights

10. What were you doing at midnight last night? reading this book called bore hole, it’s about a man who managed to get permanently stoned through the process of trepanning

11. Favorite age you’ve been so far? 21, every year after that just seems like I’m getting closer to death. lol

12. Who told you they loved you last? Preston

13. Your worst enemy? myself

14. What is your current desktop picture? Birth Machine Baby by H.R. Giger

15. Do you like someone? I like alot of people, some more than others

16. The last song you listened to? Mogwai - Take me somewhere nice

17. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up? our president

18. Who would you really like to just punch in the face? lots of people, I can’t narrow it down to just one

19. If anyone could be your slave for a day, who would it be and what would they have to do? jeremy allen white and I have him act upon everything that I desire.  

20. What is your best physical attribute? (showing said attribute is optional) my tongue. I can’t show you, you’d have to find out on your own.

21. If you were the opposite sex for one day, what would you look like and what would you do? I’d probably look like a shorter version of my nephew, because we practically have the same face. But I’d keep it simple. Grow out a beard, walk around topless all day, pee off the highest building I could find, and lots of sex with no repercussions.

22. Do you have a secret talent? If yes, what is it? I can interrupt people with burps on command

23. What is one unique thing you’re afraid of? I have no fears! except being trapped in this supernatural situation where no exits exists and the rules of time and space no longer apply.

24. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your disposal sushi sandwich! fried tempora sticky rice pattys for the buns, crab meat, seared tuna, seared salmon, crawfish, avocado, cucumbers, carrots, onions, seaweed salad, pineapple, teriyaki, and spicy mayo.  

25. You just found $100! How are you going to spend it? save it, unless I have to spend it…probably blow it on a 2 hour massage special

26. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere in the world, but you have to leave immediately. Where are you going to go? New Zealand 

27. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. “Be brand-specific” it says. Man! What are you gonna say about that? Even if you don’t drink booze there’s something you can figure out… so what’s it gonna be?  Lonestar, it’s all ever drink anyways

28. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place? anyone who argues or doesn’t agree with the proceeding rules has to kiss each other, otherwise they shall be exiled off the island. 

29. What is your favorite expletive? I don’t start shit, shit starts me. 

30. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the one thing you’re going to save from that blazing inferno? pictures of my dad. 

31. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be? I’d never want to erase any of my memories, not even the tragic one’s

32. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit… you can move to anywhere else in the world! Where would you go? Bora Bora

33. The Celestial Gates Of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn’t think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person/etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back? my dad

34. What was your last dream about? preston wasn’t what he seemed, he was the blob! and kept devouring everyone I loved whenever my back was turned. lol

35. Are you a good….[insert anything you’d like here]? at imagining scenarios that will never happen. 

36. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital? yes

37. Have you ever built a snowman? yes, human size one for the first time this year.

38. What is the color of your socks? I’m bare foot. 

39. What type of music do you like? all sorts of genres, anything with meaningful lyrics or a rhythm that can manage to make my brain drift off into space. 

40. Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets? sunsets 

41. What is your favorite milkshake flavor? cookies and creme 

42. What football team do you support? (I will answer in terms of American football as well as soccer) None, I’m always fore whoever everyone else in the room is against. 

43. Do you have any scars? yes, I have an old giant 3rd degree burn on the back of my right calf from a motorcycle exhaust pipe. 

44. What do you want to be when you graduate? a structural welder

45. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? my height, I wish I was 5 inches taller. 

46. Are you reliable? I am. But I pretend not to be so people stop asking me for so many favors. 

47. If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be? Are you happier with consistency or would you rather have the freedom to roam where ever you please?

48. Do you hold grudges? No. I just ignore people that have double crossed me. 

49. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature, what new animal would you create? a komodo dragon and a kori bustard, then I’ll finally have my flying dragon!

50. What is the most unusual conversation you’ve ever had? hmmm, it’s very rare that I ever find the most obscene topics unusual…

51. Are you a good liar? I’d like to think so. 

52. How long could you go without talking? years

53. What has been you worst haircut/style? i wasn’t ever really fond of waking up to blue hair, I felt like a clown 

54. Have you ever baked your own cake? duh!

55. Can you do any accents other than your own? nope, I’ve tried. they always come out sounding texan or cajun. lol 

56. What do you like on your toast? avocados & cheese 

57. What is the last thing you drew a picture of? brain storming for a pumpkin painting, involving horror movie villains 

58. What would be you dream vehicle? ducati scrambler 

59. Do you sing in the shower? Or do anything unusual in the shower? Explain. masturbate, doesn’t everyone  

60. Do you believe in aliens? yep. I’m pretty sure that they’re more worried about the health of our planet than us. 

61. Do you often read your horoscope? not really, if I do, I try to go against what the universe had predestined for me today. 

62. What is your favorite letter of the alphabet? Z

63. Which is cooler: dinosaurs or dragons? dragons!

64.Take a moment to think about every person you’ve ever been attracted too, which zodiac signs do you seem to be attracted to the most? libra’s, taurus’s, pisces’s, & gemini's

65. What do you think about babies? An empty vessel full of emotions that you and the rest of the universe get to shove all their knowledge into. I like babies, but definitely don’t want one anytime soon, unless by some unexpected forces of nature that cause my birth control not to work. I’d suck it up and make the sacrifices to do whats right. 

66. Freebie! Ask anything interesting you can think of. What’s the password to the football case in the pentagon?