#yes except i think joe a and taylor didn’t really have a name | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

spade-riddles · 4 years ago

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"Adjusting Expectations" Post

This submission received a lot of responses and 120 notes, so I thought I would compile the comments here.

Anonymous said:

Adjusting expectations anon was so good. If their timetables are right and we do just need to be patient a little longer, can Kaylor please send us a sign? I guess it would be too loud to slip "adjusting expectations" into social media posts, but maybe they could both do something with playing cards? To show they are card sharks right now but they'll find their way home eventually? That would reassure people. And it would fly under the radar.

casuallycruel131313 said:

I agree with a lot of this but I think the main issue right now is that moral and ethical lines have been crossed and there's no coming back from that. In these post-Trumpian insurrectionist times it's unfathomable that they could continue the Kushner narrative I no longer care if or when they come out, I enjoy the music and I'm happy to observe from a distance because I'm interested from a PR/marketing point of view but my opinion of T &K as people has changed irrevocably and I don't see how they can clean the tarnish off.

@theprologues said:

Agree with most of not all if this but I would like to say as a Kaylor the toe Grammy stunt didn’t phase me. I was not crushed by that by any means. I just shrugged and honestly expected it. It was the attributing Betty and exile to him during the LPSS in November that bummed me out and really made me go...really?

rockcrow20 said:

Have to say I also agree with most of this.

I no longer have any expectations on anything changing any time soon and have not been surprised by the recent events its to be expected after everything over the years really

Nothing has really changed (bearding narrative wise) since I fell down the rabbit hole in 2017 (except that great night in nashville 2018 rep)

Honestly I can't say I am as invested anymore about them ever coming out as I was.

I think the wb/Joe thing was the last moment for me and the continual kushner connection just troubles me like many others.

I mean my kaylor motto for awhile now has been hope for the best but expect disappointment.

Low expectations = limited feelings of disappointment.

original-cypher said:

@rockcrow20 the WB was a breaking point for so many. You are absolutely right. There are just so ma'y contradictions that feel like absolute whiplash. (I know I seem to have been the only one experiencing that with Gorgeous but... that was a big one for me, too) But like. You go on a whole PR campaign about speaking up and standing up for yourself. You say you're capable and tired of men trying to take ownership of your success and profit off of your name. And you credit you literal damn work to a bloke? Bitch, 'consistency'? Look it up. It grossed me out. It would have felt iffy if I believed they were real. But since I wasn't born yesterday it just sent me the message "this is how far I'm willing to sacrifice my principles to not be queer".

rockcrow20 said:

@original-cypher exactly why it bothered me and I know alot us so much. Such mixed messaging of being a strong fighting for your rights female and then oh hey let me attribute some of my best work to my pr boyfriend and the pr pics where she is walking behind all the time like 🙄 The Betty thing that was big one for me too!

rainbowdaisy13 said:

This write up and the comments are spot on. I don’t have much to add other than like @original-cypher said, Miss Americana is tainted for me now and seems like at the very least, it was released too soon in the plan. I get we think they have had to pivot but man, that doc, and including her literally saying “gay rights make me me” at the end was such a false flag. To see her wax poetic about not taking shit from men anymore and then see her do the same old hetero weak woman song and dance routine with the WB shit for albums that are of her genius mind has been so disappointing. I still believe Kaylor is real and I hope they get a chance to show the world that. Karlie posting that cardigan pic in the woods before the folklore release cemented for me they are still together. Adding a baby makes me feel all kind of weird ethical things but I hope I live long enough to see it play out and wear my I Told You So shirt 😁

@kellykaylor said:

agree with your post... I dont care about toe stunts but what really pissed me of was hetwashing betty 🤮! beautiful post tho anon!!

roameroo said:

Totally agree with these all comments especially the strong messaging of MA only to turn around & pull that WB = my "bf" crap. I was disheartened by her mentioning him at the Grammy's only bc he's getting credit for sh*t he doesn't/didn't do. That is what irks me the most about this, giving him credit for her life's work.

always-the-last-word said:

Can I throw my pennies in the pool ?? Taylor will put out the big three first Fearless, RED then 1989 that should bring us to about August. This is where the excitement should begin. If Taylor preps and waits for National Coming Out day it's a no lose for her. Lover her money making machine will go through the roof !! If things go bad or good in the public eye she'll have REPUTATION Taylor's Version ready to release. It will be epic and she'll own it and be FREE.

@karlie-what-you-want said:

always-the-last-word I like this take a lot! I try not to be too optimistic but if she wanted to come out sooner rather than later, I think this plan would satisfy both business and PR needs (at least on Taylor’s end). Remains to be seen how Tay will help Karlie dig her way out of the mess they made together regarding the K*shners.

always-the-last-word said:

Always remember that Taylor has a PLAN. Some of her plans are year's old (easter eggs). Taylor's one and only LOVE is her music, everything else comes second. If KK wants to change and be with her full time she'll make moves around the same time frame. That's if she chooses to. In any event Tay will be open and own all her music. I've seen this film before and WE might not like the ending.

chosetherose said:

I’ve been going back and forth for a day trying to figure out what I wanted to say when I reblogged this post. I’m tired. I’m frustrated. I understand I’m owed nothing by Taylor or Karlie. I understand that circumstances out of their control have caused the girls to pivot over and over again.

But, the root of my frustration in the past months stems not from me battling with the trivial (e.g. pap walks, etc.) but with my personal principles. I fiercely believe credit should be given where it is earned and I uphold this in my career regularly. To see Taylor crediting Toe with her art was deeply disappointing. Watch the 1989 and folklore acceptance speeches back to back and tell me it doesn’t upset you. I believe the K******s have blood on their hands and that their actions during the pandemic have killed people. To see Karlie still associating with one of them disgusts me.

I can’t help but think back in frustration - Would you really fall from grace to touch her face? (And in the brilliant words of @9w1ft) But would you die for her in public? I go back and forth feeling like questions like this aren’t fair at all and thinking they are sort of valid. At this point, it sort of feels like Taylor would only fall from grace for her lover if all the stars and facets of her life aligned perfectly. But perfection like this does not happen. Such is life. So why am I here?

I do question why Spade left certain messages in their final days. I am still holding hope a fervent revolution exonerates everyone. I so desperately want Taylor to regain control of her masters or re-records. Maybe this is the plan they thought was best with multiple goals in mind (re-records, having a family, coming out of the closet one day etc). I’m trying to remain patient because Spade told us to trust her endless yearning. But WOW it is asking a lot of us at this point.

Anonymous said:

Despite being a pragmatist kaylor and oftentimes getting into arguments with fellow optimistic kaylors (owner of this blog included) I think it's quite unfair -at this point- to say to the optimists who have patiently sat through the worst kind of stunts with the most terrible kind of people (yes I'm talking about the Kushner's friend group too) that they should have seen it coming. Besides, if it weren't for the optimists we the cynicals would have burned this fandom down by now.

Anonymous said:

Even if we ignore that an insurrection happened partially because of the family karlie's still working for and getting paid from, she literally said before the pregnancy debacle unfolded that j*sh was her last client while talking about cutting hair and doing a cutting gesture. How should we have interpreted that? 😤That a year later she would be more stuck with the Kushners than ever? We don't wake up on day and decide to have unrealistic expectations. She feeds into them. 😠

Anonymous said:

I have no expectation of Taylor coming out anymore. Zero. None. I have no expectation of her dropping Toe or even of Kaylor publicly reuniting. It doesn't even matter that much anymore. But I - do - expect 1 thing. Karlie to drop and completely dissociate herself from the Kushners and this has nothing to do with kaylor. It was everything to do with me being unable to support a person who willfully assists (now using her baby too) and receives money from a family that has made so many suffer.

Anonymous said:

A quick word from an ex-kaylor (who will never become an anti). A year ago, when the Trumps were still in power and untouchable and there was no baby, I was excusing and turning a blind eye to many things Karlie did for the K*shners. Even that dinner in September. I had also made peace with the truth never being revealed. But a year later the Trumps are gone, Karlie is still on full stunting mode now with a baby in the mix, a baby that is already being used by the Kushners, and I've really run out of excuses. Now the only thing that could possibly keep me on board is if I knew there was a good chance that the full truth would come out, so that Karlie's inexplicable and honestly borderline immoral actions could eventually make sense. But as your sub said, this is an unrealistic expectation, thus I became an ex-kaylor and I'm not planning to come back even when they reunite. 😕

Anonymous said:

What baffles me is that Taylor has explicitly expressed her regret about not giving her lover the credit she deserves and her doubt whether fame is worth hiding her true love: "when I walked up to the podium, I think I forgot to say your name", "what's a lifetime of achievement, if I pushed you to the edge". But yet again she didn't do anything to change this. I didn't expect her to acknowledge Karlie, but a nod or at least not falsely crediting her beard would be a good start.

Anonymous said:

1🙁 Let me chime in re: "expectations". I'm one of the kaylors who ever since the pregnancy reveal was trying to tell everyone there's NO way she was gonna dump him soon after birth let alone before that. It would bring too much unnecessary attention and Jerk would have never agreed to something that would make him look like a bad guy/husband. For the exact same reasons, I was also saying there's no way he wasn't going to post about the baby. All the above against the popular opinion back then.

2🙁 So I agree that the day of the birth post was known to T, not the timing though. Simply bc Kushner-leaning outlets made sure to note that detail. If they wanted it to go unnoticed, why draw attention to it? That being said, kaylors would have been more patient with this mess, if Karlie hadn't gone overboard with her freedom "smoke signals" last summer and Tay's "insiders" hadn't been insinuating that the end is VERY near. Both of them SHOULD have known by then how we would react to these.

3🙁 So it's natural that everyone feels played and has no patience for any more bullshit. Another sore point is how Jerk AND the Kushner-Trump klan monopolize the baby news. This isn't just to make it realistic, it's an abuse of Kaylor's baby's name to garner good pr for the worst family in America, with Karlie's blessing. In order for her marriage and split to appear realistic she's putting a LIFETIME burden on her child's back. Unless you believe she's eventually gonna say Jerk isn't the dad.

4🙁 So "we’re in a position we should realistically have been able to see coming". But we did see it coming, that why some made these extreme scenarios, bc this is the worst possible outcome. "Good people try to make it work, even in bad relationships." Ultimately this isn't just a "bad rs". It's a horrific association that should have been resolved ages ago, not one to bring your child into, doom it to suffer a similar fate, and expect people to sit idly and watch. That's what frustrates most.

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rawiswhore · 4 years ago

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Various WCW, WWF, and ECW Wrestlers x Fem Reader- “I Touch Myself”

I actually originally planned on typing and posting this fanfic on Sunday, but Wrestlemania was on that day, and I wondered if I should type a fanfic set at Wrestlemania or what I originally planned on typing, so I typed and posted a fanfic set at Wrestlemania instead.

Also, I typed this fanfic yesterday and wanted to post it yesterday, but didn't have time to finish it, so I'm posting it today.

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In 1996 and 1997, a wrestling company known as WCW had higher ratings than the WWF, and the WWF was once the most popular wrestling company in the world, and even still is today now known as the WWE.

You had signed with the WWF in 1996, and one of the rules you had under their contract is that you weren't allowed to work for other wrestling companies, which was so lame.

You've seen some of WCW, and some of the wrestlers over in WCW are hot and sexy.

You wish you could hook up with some of the hotties over in WCW, but sadly, you can't.

Lousy contract.

So what can you do?

Simple, and I'll explain it later.

When the summer of 1997 was almost over, you were lying in bed one night in a hotel room, with all of the lights in the room turned off.

You thought about how hot some of those men in WCW were and what you wish you could do with them if you were with them.

You had shut your eyes, though you're trying to not fall asleep, and one of your hands had slipped down your thong panties and the pads of your fingers had touched your vulva.

You started picturing and fantasizing about a wrestler in WCW that many people probably have never even heard of, and the reason why is because he was never pushed that much and was booked as a "jobber": someone who makes another wrestler look good, and that wrestler is Jim Powers.

What a cookie cutter sounding wrestling name.

Despite that corny wrestling moniker, Jim Powers is really hot and sexy, so hot, there was even a WCW moment involving him, an Ultimate Warrior knockoff named the Renegade who had ditched his face paint and fried, crunchy hair, a wrestler named Joe Gomez and a skinny twinkish wrestler called Alex Wright walking on the beach together and taking their shirts off.

This moment was obvious fan service for some of the women watching WCW.

When you fantasized about Jim Powers that night, you fantasized of him wrapping his huge, muscular arms embracing you and pulling you close to his chest, and you had lifted your hands and wrapped your fingers atop of his biceps and gently squeezed them.

His biceps were rock hard, and that wasn't the only thing that was rock hard on him (winkwinknudgenudge).

Jim isn't the only hot one in WCW.

One of the more popular wrestlers that was in the biggest, most notorious wrestling faction in WCW; the wrestling faction that would increase WCW's ratings, was Scott Hall, who used to play Razor Ramon in the WWF.

Scott was even hotter in WCW than in the WWF as Razor Ramon, and he'd get even sexier as the 90's were coming to a close.

Scott Hall/Razor Ramon is known for having a very hairy chest, and your brain switched to now thinking about yourself in front of Scott Hall with your face buried in his chest hair, while Jim Powers was standing behind you and had his massive, strong arms wrapped around your waist.

As you were fantasizing about this, the tips and pads of your fingers started gently caressing and stroking vertically up and down your clitoris.

The tip of your finger scratched your clit underneath your clitoral hood, trying to make sure you feel something, and you felt a slight little tickle under that hood.

Rubbing your clitoris isn't the only thing you can rub on your body to make you feel good.

Your other hand slipped underneath your oversized T-shirt you slept in tonight and let the pads and tips of your fingers touch your stomach, where you began to vertically slide and elevate those fingers up your torso.

As you slid your fingers up your flesh, you fantasized about that scenario with your face buried in Scott Hall's chest while Jim Powers was behind you with his arms wrapped around you.

Blood is already rushing to your clitoris fantasizing about this, swelling your clit up and making you even hornier.

Room for one more, honey.

There's another wrestler in WCW who had gotten even sexier when he ditched the face paint, messy hair and even the Ultimate Warrior knockoff gimmick, and that wrestler is the aforementioned Renegade.

The hottest the Renegade ever looked was probably in 1996, before he grew facial hair, so you imagined the way the Renegade looked that year, where, while you have Scott Hall in front of you and Jim Powers behind you, the Renegade is on one of your sides, wrapping his massive, huge muscles around your waist, but not squeezing and hugging onto you too tight.

It's like you're trapped and can't be released from these hot men all over you, but you want this.

It's also almost like these men are shielding and protecting you.

It feels good when you take your clothes off and the air is all over your skin, maybe you can undress tonight and masturbate naked.

These little fantasies are tame and mild, so you decided to make your fantasies get a little bit naughtier.

Lex Luger has crossed over to WCW during the late 90's, and for those who don't know, Lex Luger was promoted by the WWF in 1993/1994 to be the next Hulk Hogan and the next face of the company since Hogan left, and they turned Lex's character into a patriotic, all American hero, except Lex didn't have any of Hogan's charisma and audiences didn't really click with Lex.

Lex eventually joined WCW by the end of 1995, and he actually was kind of sexy.

Lex's body, even during his days in the WWF, was always glazed and slathered in baby oil, and your mind had abandoned the thought of Scott, Jim and the Renegade all around you and switched over to just Lex.

You imagined being with Lex the way he looked in 1996/1997 with his hair hanging down and not wearing a shirt, and you imagined one of your hands caressing baby oil vertically up and down his torso, your palm and fingers feeling the ripples of his muscles on his torso.

You didn't just imagine caressing baby oil on his torso, but also sliding it up and down across his arms as well.

He, meanwhile, is just staring at your hand caressing that baby oil on his body, the baby oil making his body shinier.

Baby oil isn't the only thing that can make someone's skin shinier, and so your mind thought of something else.

This time, your mind began to think of him the way he looked in 1996 and 1997, his hair hanging down and not tied back in a ponytail, his body is stark naked with not a single stitch of clothes on him.

You pictured that Lex in a locker room's shower, where the floor is white little tiles, and you were fantasizing that you were naked in that shower with him, where your hand was caressing and stroking his body with body wash while he stood under a showerhead, the water pouring and washing away the foamy wash off of his washboard abdomen.

When the body wash had evaporated and disappeared off of his abs and trickled down his legs, his abdomen looked shinier, like you had smeared baby oil on his abs.

You didn't just rub his abs with that body wash, but his pecs as well, where, of course, the water had rinsed the foam off of them, his pectoral muscles looking shiny under the buzzing lights on the ceiling.

Lex doesn't really look all that hot with wet hair though, and to be honest, Lex isn't really that sexy or hot of a wrestler.

As you fantasized about Lex, your fingers, especially the pads and tips of them, were crawling up your skin to your breasts, you felt these cold little tingles while your fingers brushed up your skin.

If you had any body hair on your legs and even arms, you're pretty sure the hair on your body would stand up over the sharp feel of your fingers caressing your skin.

Rushes are transmitting to your areolas whilst your fingers elevate up your flesh.

Honestly, these fantasies involving Lex Luger are a bit too tame for your taste, now to go all out wild, what you really want.

Your brain switched to thinking about something else.

This time, you fantasized about a sauna or steam room, and inside that steam room was WCW alumni Scott Hall, the Renegade circa 1996 with his hair hanging down, Jim Powers, Lex Luger circa 1996/1997, Scotty Riggs without facial hair (looking how he did during the last months of '97), Eric Bischoff in January of '97, Joe Gomez, Raven (who just joined the roster and left ECW), Stevie Richards without facial hair, the blond one in this WCW duo called High Voltage, Chris Benoit (yes, THAT Chris Benoit, before he, well y'know...), and maybe even Chris Jericho.

They're not the only ones in this steam room, so is some of the WWF roster: Shawn Michaels, Hunter Hearst Helmsley with his hair hanging down, Billy Gunn/RockaBilly with blond hair, Jeff Hardy, Leif Cassidy without facial hair, Marty Jannetty, Brian Pillman in late 1996, Bret Hart, Davey Boy Smith, Scott Putski without facial hair, Scott Taylor, Brian Christopher, and these Hispanic wrestlers named Heavy Metal, Hector Garza, Latin Lover and Pierroth without his mask and hair tied back in a ponytail.

You could probably even invite Thurman "Sparky" Plugg in late 1996 and Jeff Jarrett in early 1996 in this fantasy too, though you feel embarrassed to put them in there.

Finally, one wrestling icon you're putting in this fantasy is Rowdy Roddy Piper in during the late 80's and early 90's, when he had long hair and didn't have bangs.

He is kinda cute with long hair.

All of these aforementioned men were sitting in this sauna stark naked with nothing but a towel wrapped around their waists, hiding their genitals, and you entered the sauna, where you were the only girl in that sauna.

You had shed your towel off of your body, revealing you weren't wearing anything under that towel, showing your nude body off in front of them.

After they made some silly wolf whistles at you and had ear-to-ear smiles spreading across their faces, you walked up to these wrestlers and approached them, where they all disrobed themselves and it lead to you getting gangbanged, and you don't mean gangbanged as in being shot with guns, at least not the literal definition of a gun.

Though, how is that even possible?

What can you do if you're gangbanged by 30 men?

Well, you could ride these men's dicks one by one, but that's not really a gangbang, more like running a train.

You could ride one of their dicks while you're sucking on another dick and masturbating 2 other cocks in front of your face while 2 other wrestlers are rubbing the tips and heads of their penises in circles on your areolas and jerking their cocks off, while several other wrestlers are jerking off in front of your face and your hands sometimes take turns to crank up and down their shafts, masturbating them, as well as taking turns to suck on their cocks as well, and each wrestler in that sauna all gets a turn to do that or have that happen to them.

You've had a gangbang like that in the summer of '97, where wrestlers from the WWF and WCW had exercised at the same gym, and you invited the sexiest wrestlers in the WWF to the locker room of a gym, where you had this gangbang with them, and after they had all jizzed, you let who you thought were the sexiest men in WCW to do the same gangbang these WWF men did, and after they jizzed, the last ones you let do the same aforementioned gangbang to you were some other hot men from the WWF.

In fact, those hot men from WCW you had a gangbang with are some of the same men you're fantasizing about tonight.

That was one of the happiest and best days of your life, and probably their lives as well.

That was probably the only time, for now, anyway, where these men from WCW had sex with you.

Either way, you were trying to fantasize about getting gangbanged by the hottest men from the WWF, WCW and even a few hotties from ECW as well in a sauna.

While you tried to fantasize about this, your fingers had reached one of your nipples, which had become erect, and you love the feel of your nipples being rubbed and tweaked, you love that feeling even more than having your clit rubbed.

Thank God you're fantasizing about this at the right time, and the pads of your fingers at your nipple began to rub horizontally left and right, back and forth on your areola.

You actually have pressed your fingers on your clitoris before, and it feels really good, you can feel a little something under your vagina, so as you rubbed your areola, the pads of your fingers this time pressed down on your clitoral hood, pressing until you feel a hard surface under your vagina where you can feel something.

You bit your bottom lip and slightly arched your head back, your toes curled and bunched up, your lips trying to block a moan from being released.

Thank God that you didn't have anyone in bed with you to hear you moan.

Your moans sound more like a gasp than an orgasmic moan, and chills were running down your spine while you masturbated yourself.

You tried to make your fingers vertically rub up and down your clitoris while they were also pressing down on it as well, did it work?

Somewhat, yeah.

Rubbing faster might do the trick in making you cum as well, so you increased the pace when you rubbed your clit, rubbing faster than usual.

You didn't just rub your clit vertically, but also rubbed your clitoris around in circles with the pads of your fingers.

Getting gangbanged by several WWF, WCW and a few ECW wrestlers isn't the only thing that's sexy.

You've been gangbanged in locker rooms several times, and so your mind began to imagine being in a locker room instead, where you're getting gangbanged by these sexy aforementioned WWF, WCW and a few ECW wrestlers that you imagined being gangbanged in a sauna with.

You imagined being stark naked with these aforementioned wrestlers swarming all around you, masturbating several of these wrestlers' cocks in front of your face and tits and taking turns to suck their dicks and lick their shafts, getting their precum and jizz all over your face and breasts and in your mouth, where you swallow their cum.

Plus, you could maybe even ride one or 2 of these wrestler's cocks; one is in your pussy and the other in your asshole.

As you fantasized of this, your fingers on your areola began to switch this time; putting your nipple in between the pad of your thumb and index finger, where you began to tweak and pinch that nipple, turning it a bit.

You tried rubbing your clit even faster than usual fantasizing about this, and you really want something like this.

High pitched little moans are coming out of your mouth, and you hope that the neighbors next door won't hear them.

It's gonna probably take some time until you really do cum.

Your pussy feels like it's getting wetter and wetter and releasing something through the pores of your vagina while you're masturbating, and you're breathing short little gasps as you masturbate yourself.

You haven't been faking your orgasm tonight, you really do feel this way when you're touching yourself, and you keep elevating yourself up more and more.

You've also been trying to stay awake and not fall asleep despite your eyes being closed and eyelids feeling heavy.

Like your nipple, your fingers then began to place your clitoris in between the pads of your index finger and thumb, where you squeezed and pressed your clit together.

You've tried this before, and it feels really good too.

You can feel a little something down there when you're squeezing your clit together.

Goddamn it, you really want some of these hot men from WCW and the WWF right now, but at least when you can have these hot men from the WWF and you've had them many times.

You removed your thumb off of your nipple, and this time, you began to run the tip of your index finger on your areola in circles over and over again.

While these sexual fantasies are pretty hot, are these the perfect gangbangs?

Now some of these men are undeniably hot, like Shawn Michaels, Hunter Hearst Helmsley, Jeff Hardy, Rob Van Dam, Scott Hall, and Jim Powers, but then there's Brian Pillman, who's the least sexiest out of all of these men.

You're also unsure if you should have Jeff Jarrett and Sparky Plugg in these fantasies, hell, even the name Sparky Plugg is corny (so is his gimmick).

Speaking of fantasies, you've heard of something known as a glory hole, which can sometimes be when someone is in a stall and there's one or more holes drilled in the stalls, and men poke and stick their penises in those holes where someone sucks and jerks those cocks off.

You even tried to recreate a glory hole not once, but twice in the summer of '97.

You imagined yourself in a narrow little stall, like the stall to a changing room, with several holes drilled in the sides, and those holes were filled with the penises of these sexy wrestlers you've been fantasizing about tonight.

In your fantasy, your fingers are wrapped around their shafts and masturbating their dicks, one cock is aiming at your face while another is pointing at one of your breasts, and while you're jerking them off you're sucking and licking on one wrestler's penis and swallowing his precum.

Each of these penises get a chance to get sucked, licked and masturbated in this fantasy, all of their precum gets in your face, in your mouth, down your throat and on your tits, and your hands are scrambling to another penis to pump their cocks quickly.

One thing that you've noticed that feels really good is when you rub your fingers over your clothed clitoris and areola, so your hand vertically elevated up your vagina and exited out of your panties, and lifted your hand out of under your shirt.

The tips of your fingers were a little gooey and wet from rubbing your moist pussy, despite your fingers rubbing your clit, not being up your twat, though you can always clean your fingers off with your mouth.

You placed the tips of your fingers over your clothed breast as well as your fingers over your clitoris shielded by your panties, where you began to vertically rub your fingers up and down your clit whereas your other fingers rubbed horizontally back and forth across your areola covered by your t-shirt this time.

This feels really, really good. If you've never done anything like this, I reccomend it.

The fabric of your panties nudged and attached to your areola and vagina, and you can feel your nipple poking and pointing through your T-shirt.

As you rubbed and masturbated yourself, you continued imagining that glory hole fantasy, imagining you're sucking and licking the hottest wrestler's cock like Shawn Michaels or Jeff Hardy, swallowing his precum, while you're masturbating Scott Hall's dick pointing at your face and jacking off Jim Powers' dick pointing at your tits.

Eventually, your mind drifts to fantasizing of sucking Hunter Hearst Helmsley, Rob Van Dam, Scott Hall or Jim Powers while jerking off Shawn Michaels, Jeff Hardy, the Renegade or even Scott Putski, and then the aforementioned ones getting their dicks jacked off get their cocks sucked as well.

Don't worry, even the likes of Brian Pillman, Bret Hart, Davey Boy Smith, and others get their dicks sucked and jerked off as well.

You're definitely not fantasizing of sucking and jacking off the really ugly wrestlers like most of the Dudley brothers from ECW, eeeech.

You actually wish you were a man, a gay man even, so that way, you can masturbate and jack off to these sexual fantasies you're having tonight.

One thing you haven't done tonight is try to put your fingers up your twat, maybe you can do that.

You wanna save the best for last; fantasizing about sucking and jacking off the hottest male wrestlers ever.

Maybe they'll make you cum, that's why you're saving the hottest and sexiest ones for last.

You're trying to rub your fingers over your clothed clitoris not just vertically, but horizontally, as well as rubbing your clit around in circles.

You're also rubbing the tips of your fingers over your fabric covered areola around in circles, you can feel your nipple sticking out in the middle.

You rubbed your clit fast and quick, running the pads of your fingers in circles over your clit.

You moaned and gasped while you rubbed your clit, your head arching back and your face and head looking like it's in an orgasmic state.

As you masturbated yourself, you fantasizing of sucking Shawn Michaels' cock, licking up his shaft and swallowing his precum, while you jerked off Rob Van Dam and Scott Hall, your fingers quickly moving to another shaft to masturbate Jeff Hardy, Jim Powers and Hunter Hearst Helmsley.

And in your fantasy, you grabbed another cock and moved it to your mouth, leaving Shawn's dick out of your mouth and sucking on Jeff Hardy or Rob Van Dam or Scott Hall while you jack off Shawn Michaels.

You mumbled and bit your lip, holding your moans back, and then, suddenly, your pussy had creamed, your twat becoming wetter than ever before, gushing your salty, slippery cum.

Your clitoris pounded and throbbed after you had came, and y'know how when you cum and you're a female, sometimes it feels like you've only came a little bit?

That wasn't the case with you.

While you didn't burst like a fire hydrant when you came, you were definitely wet in the panties, and you didn't pee your panties.

Despite that you've finally came, since you didn't get the chance to insert your fingers inside your twat, you lifted one of your hands off of your underwear and slid them down your panties, until your fingers touched your wet, slippery vulva.

Even though you're wearing panties, with your index and middle fingers attached to each other, to tried to insert those 2 fingers up your pussy hole, not your urethra where pee comes out, but the hole many cocks have entered; the hole babies are born from and menstrual blood flows out.

The tips of your fingers slowly were entering and penetrating into your wet twat hole, stretching your walls apart, and when your fingers were inside enough your cunt hole, you began to make those fingers fuck you like it's a penis, your fingers moving back and forth inside your pussy hole.

You didn't just fingerbang yourself, but you also pressed your thumb on your clit, moving your clit around in circles with your thumb, as well as still continued rubbing your fingers on your areola covered by fabric.

As you finger fucked yourself, you fantasized of these WWF, WCW and some ECW wrestlers you thought were sexy "running a train" on you, where they're all waiting in line to fuck you and each of them get a turn one by one.

You eventually got tired of finger fucking yourself, so you slid your fingers out of your twat, your fingers now gooey and sticky, but you moved your thumb off of your clit and started rubbing your clitoris with your fingers.

You rubbed your clit vertically, horizontally, and in circles with the tips and pads of your fingers.

You may as well call it a night right now, and you waited to drift off to sleep while still masturbating yourself.

When you were waiting and trying to fall asleep, you thought of these wrestlers you've fantasized about tonight all rubbing and caressing your naked body with body wash in a locker room shower, lathering your body up with foam, and they all get chances and have their hands traveling all over your body, while your hands are trying to touch on each of their chests and arms as well, rub the foamy body wash on their skin, trying to put your hands on their body parts and vertically caress them.

You have so many hot sexual fantasies with wrestlers that could be porn, and you even acted out some of your sexual fantasies with these professional wrestlers you've fantasized about.

When you woke up in the morning, your hand was still down your panties, though you still didn't continue masturbating when you fell asleep.

Y'know, Cyndi Lauper was one of the reasons the WWF blew up in popularity in the 1980's, she even guest starred in the WWF and had professional wrestlers and wrestling managers in her music videos.

And one of her most notorious songs is a song called "She Bop", about her masturbating.

________________________________________________________________

I actually tried fantasizing of getting gangbanged by so many hot men from the WWF, WCW and some from ECW (maybe even a few from modern WWE, NXT and AEW too) while I masturbated last night.

#wcw #wwf #ecw #1997 #90s #fanfiction

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youareboththebestbestfriend · 4 years ago

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This is LONG, I’m sorry. I have a theory about how Hoax & the 1 are linked. So I relistened to Hoax with lyrics ready, because I’ve heard it before but didn’t really LISTEN. I did now and I feel like, what ended Kaylor, is that Karlie did betray/deceive her with the Scooby thing. Or maybe she didn’t sell her out, but she didn’t STOP working with him, she didn’t end a contract. In a way, she choose HIS side. I feel that’s what Hoax is about (see lyrics below). I feel like the 1 is actually coming to terms with losing the person Taylor thought was the one. I think Hoax was written before the 1. I like that the ending track is host, because when you replay the album, it continues the story by saying she’s trying to feel better about it. So here it goes… (hehe)

HOAX

My only one // refers back to “the 1” (see below)My smoking gun // I think Taylor “killed” the relationship

My eclipsed sun // Karlie being the sun, but eclipsed, meaning in the shadows/not visible

This has broken me down // She’s hurt by her decision to end it

My twisted knife // Call it what you want reference or maybe TIWWCHNT or LWYMMD about backstabbing

Stood on the cliffside screaming, "Give me a reason" // For Karlie betraying her/SB drama

Your faithless love's the only hoax I believe in // faithless (disloyal) love’s the only hoax (deception)

Don't want no other shade of blue but you // Never seen that shade of blue (Karlie Konfirmed)

No other sadness in the world would do // She’d take her back (I think, this is also a theme in more songs on folklore)

My best laid plan // Plan of coming out or going public together?

Your sleight of hand // skilful deception, she really didn’t see it coming

My barren land, I am ash from your fire // swaying as the room burned down (DWOHT reference)

You know I left a part of me back in New York // She moved to NYC (for her)

You knew the hero died, so what's the movie for // all my heroes die all alone (the Archer, where she asked “would you stay?”)

You knew it still hurts underneath my scars // (see below the 1)

From when they pulled me apart // Scooby Braun drama

You knew the password, so I let you in the door // I don’t like your kingdom keys, they once belonged to me (LWYMMD reference)

But what you did was just as dark // Dark side, I look for your dark side (the Archer)

Darling, this was just as hard as when they pulled me apart // SB drama obviously hurt but the fact that Karlie wasn’t on her side was just as hard

My only one, my kingdom come undone // KOMH reference??

My broken drum, you have beaten my heart // Didn’t she use drums in KOMH at rep tour as well??

THE 1

I'm doing good, I'm on some new shit // Better than when writing Hoax Been saying "Yes" instead of "No" // Seems like she avoided meeting with people/being depressed and finding her way back to normal life I thought I saw you at the bus stop, I didn't though // I forgot which song where she talks about them/her seeing someone/her ghost? I hit the ground running each night, I hit the Sunday matinee // both distractions to feel better You know the greatest films of all time were never made // ‘cause cruelty wins in the movies (the Archer) I guess you never know, never know // she didn’t expect deception, see Hoax And if you wanted me, you really should've showed // showed Taylor that she was on HER side not SB And if you never bleed, you're never gonna grow // she talks about herself, bleeding refers back to Hoax, how much that hurt (scars/beaten heart) And it's alright now // she’s doing better But we were something, don't you think so? // this seems like looking back on good memories And if my wishes came true it would've been you // pretty clear she wished Karlie would have been the 1, also refers back to some songs on Lover (including title track) In my defense, I have none // she has NO ONE, pretty clear bearding/Joe breakup For never leaving well enough alone // I never leave well enough alone (ME! Reference) Having adventures on your own // I think she wants Karlie to choose for herself, “my ride or die” reference You meet some woman on the Internet and take her home // I feel this refers to “stalk you on the internet” in gorgeous. Maybe Karlie was the one stalking her and taking HER home? I feel like she’s telling Karlie it’s OK to have adventures on your own and then let history repeat itself but making the ending different? We never painted by the numbers, baby // we were different, not following rules a.k.a. sounds like not following heteronormative standards You know the greatest loves of all time are over now // I don’t actually know this reference, it does give me the Archer vibes (would you stay?) I guess you never know, never know // this reminds me again of the archer, wishing you knew if someone would stay, I guess you never know if someone betrays you If one thing had been different would everything be different today? // pretty sure this is about if one of them was a man, their love wouldn’t have had faced many problems they had today �� problems that may have broken them up For digging up the grave another time // I think this is referring back to Hoax, where she did dig up the grave, this is why I think Hoax was written before the 1

Other lyrics I think may relate to this theory:

Cardigan (Karligan) But I knew you, dancing in your Levi's drunk under a streetlight // Karlie was a Levi’s model and the drunk under a streetlight gives me YAIL vibes To kiss in cars and downtown bars was all we needed, You drew stars around my scars, but now I'm bleeding // Cornelia street/Delicate vibes and Dress “put your mark on me, a golden tattoo”, the now I’m bleeding refers back to Hoax/the 1 'Cause I knew you, stepping on the last train, marked me like a bloodstain, I knew you, tried to change the ending // she knew Karlie and hadn’t seen deception/Hoax coming and tried to save their relationship but Karlie didn’t show (Hoax) as in; stop hanging/working with SB It does feel like in the end of Cardigan they made up? Taylor did talk in Hoax about how she’d want no other sadness than that love. Basically all of Exile screams break-up, not specifically related to the hurt/deception in Hoax (explicitly). Except maybe the “you never gave me a warning sign/I didn’t see the signs” about betrayal. It does give me big KOMH vibes with the whole, “you’re not my homeland/crown anymore”. It also references bearding (you laugh but the joke’s not funny reminds me of how miserable Karlie always looks when she’s out with Josh). When I hear the song I think of Taylor as the Man singing, and Taylor singing Karlie’s POV.. My tears ricochet does reference quite a few things. We gather here, we line up weeping in a sunlit room And if I'm on fire, you'll be made of ashes, too// she mentions the fire and ashes in Hoax. I feel like this is when they decided to have a talk, and the possible break-up. Even on my worst day, did I deserve, babe, all the hell you gave me? // this breaks my heart, basically same as “screaming Give me reason” in Hoax Because I loved you, I swear I loved you till my dying day // Lover and CIWYW vibes I didn't have it in myself to go with grace // Don’t blame me reference? Or maybe she wanted to like, break up with Karlie and not be sad but strong and she couldn’t be strong? And if I'm dead to you why are you at the wake? // Feeling like Karlie still checks up on Taylor with their shared friends maybe? Or uses her for clout. Cursing my name, wishing I stayed, look at how my tears ricochet // I’m confused at this part We gather stones, never knowing what they'll mean, some to throw, some to make a diamond ring // Josh/Karlie marriage? You know I didn't want to have to haunt you, but what a ghostly scene you wear the same jewels that I gave you as you bury me // I feel like the haunting relates to releasing folklore which she drags Karlie with her basically. The jewel reference is pretty obvious, I guess. 'Cause when I'd fight, you used to tell me I was brave // the times before they went through negativity together (kimye drama? Kissgate?) And I can go anywhere I want, anywhere I want just not home // Cornelia street vibes when Taylor left her own home And you can aim for my heart, go for blood but you would still miss me in your bones // I don’t know what this means but it hurts And I still talk to you when I'm screaming at the sky // at the sun, perhaps? And when you can't sleep at night you hear my stolen lullabies // this relates to a song about her ghost following the other person? I cannot remember what song And so the battleships will sink beneath the waves, you had to kill me, but it killed you just the same // I think this is a reference to Karlie not wanting to break up (wishing I stayed), so by choosing SB’s side, she killed Taylor and therefore their relationship/herself You turned into your worst fears, and you're tossing out blame, drunk on this pain, crossing out the good years // I feel like this could be both of the girl’s POV. The fears remind me of the archer and DWOHT. Crossing out the good years because it hurts. The good years where Karlie did stay by her side. I feel like mirrorball is before that. It’s positive, shining just for you like the sun/Karlie shines for her. I’m still a believer, I feel like they have had their fights but she’s still a believer everything will be okay? I think this is written before Hoax? Seven is unrelated but gay AF, I mean “hiding in the closet” and “I still love you” about a girl with braided patterns. August is about their affairs/love even though Karlie was never hers, but unrelated to the Hoax/the 1 theory I think. It’s more like a good looking back but being sad? Okay so there’s a LOT in this is me trying. I feel like it’s Afterglow 2.0. She knows she crewed up, this is her trying to make up. Then there’s the I tried pin. I feel like this part might be about a different time in their relationship? I don’t think it references SB drama and deception. I feel like it’s also HYGTG 2.0? Maybe if Afterglow and HYGTG had a child, haha. I think illicit affairs is Delicate 2.0 and about their sneaking around. I don’t think it’s related to Hoax. It’s very gay tho, “You taught me a secret language I can't speak with anyone else and you know damn well for you I would ruin myself ...a million little times”. This also makes me feel like Taylor was ready to come out (together) but Karlie wasn’t. I feel like we always thought it was the other way around? I feel like invisible strings is about clues that when you start to identify as queer you look back and you’re like “it makes so much sense”. The three-year trip down to the lakes reminds me of big-sur but I don’t understand that timeline. That was in 2014? That’d mean they’d been together since 2011? But I think they met/started seeing each other after VSFS 2013? Or maybe it’s not about Karlie, however the dive bar and gold have BIGASS delicate music video vibes. Like, the golden paper brought her to that dive bar in the video. So Delicate/invisible string are probably related. While mad woman might reference some things in Hoax, I don’t think it’s about that. I feel like it’s kimye or Scooby. I don’t think Karlie was poking a bear. I think she made a mistake that cost them their relationship, but not that she did it on purpose. The cursing my name, wishing I’d come back makes me feel like Karlie regrets it as well. I feel like epiphany is about her mom or maybe even COVID? Not related to Kaylor? I do think Betty is about Karlie ElizaBETTY Kloss, but I think the mistakes she refers to are more like the problems they may have in Afterglow/this is me trying. Fights, but not the one that ended it all. Peace screams The Archer to me and with that anxiety. Would it be enough if I could never give you peace//who will stay? Also DWOHT, about her fears. “I’d give you my sunshine” actually makes me feel like this is Karlie’s POV. I’m having an epiphany, what if it is Karlie’s POV looking at the sunshine line. That would make sense about “I see your brother as my brother” from Karlie’s POV because Taylor actually has a brother! Maybe this song is Karlie’s POV, because she can’t leave Josh? So she can never give Taylor peace? I don’t know, could be either POV! Not related to Hoax though.

Conclusion:

I think Hoax is about Karlie choosing SB side, whether she sold Taylor out, didn’t tell her about that deal and knowing, or not stopping working with him AFTER the SB drama. I feel like, in Lover Taylor was still optimistic about their relationship. Lover, Cornelia street and Daylight being the biggest clues. She was going to name the album Daylight (literally a synonym for sunshine “Karlie”). She changed it to Lover, which makes me think Karlie = Lover. I think they did probably have fights problems, I mean even DWOHT in reputation etc and Afterglow in Lover. I think some songs of folklore are also about those fights (Exile, this is me trying, Betty and Peace), but I think Hoax is about Karlie betraying her and Taylor breaking it off. I feel like the 1 is one of the last songs written (maybe with Cardigan), where she’s doing a little better? I feel like the break-up was quite recent, the SB drama happened in June 2019 I think?? Lover was already produced then, even if they may have broken it off at that time. I’m the biggest Kaylor and this album hurts AF. But there’s so many Kaylor references, I hope both of them get closure. I really thought they’d make it, but I guess you never know... Kookies for the ones still reading. Reply me with your theories/additions. :)

#kaylor #gaylor swift #taylor swift #hoax #the 1 #masterpost analysis #folkaylore #let me know your thoughts #sorry this is so long #woopsie

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perfectlymarilynmonroe · 5 years ago

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I just saw a tiktok talking about how Marilyn had relationships with women, they mentioned Joan Crawford and Elizabeth Taylor and her acting coach, and that her therapist revealed that to the public. They even said Joe confirmed it saying that that was the reason their marriage didnt work out. I have never heard or read that before but everyone just took it as facts in those comments, could you clear it up?

Nope. All of the rumors of her dating woman have never been proven, and Joe never confirmed it. I’m really not sure where the rumors originated from, but biographers and sites continue to spread the myth.

There definitely hasn’t been anything to prove an affair with Elizabeth Taylor, as for Joan Crawford, Biographer Fred Lawrence Guiles wrote that she invited Marilyn back to her home and made a pass at her:

“Marilyn was more than ready for an affair with someone she could also admire. Her emotional life was far more complex than the public could even imagine. No sooner had she extricated herself from her entanglement with Natasha than she became involved in a serious friendship with Joan Crawford. Although Crawford’s career was again in decline, she was still a social presence of considerable importance in Hollywood. She had initiated the relationship by phoning Marilyn at the studio and inviting her to her home for Sunday brunch. Marilyn was thrilled to be taken up by one of her early idols and began dropping by Crawford’s home frequently. They found that they had a mutual interest in Christian Science. The aging film queen began to give her advice on how to dress and even offered her part of her own wardrobe, but since Crawford was petite and Marilyn was five foot six, nothing would fit. Just before Marilyn’s first date with DiMaggio, at another brunch and with the hostess slightly drunk, Crawford made a sexual pass at Marilyn and the friendship abruptly ended. Marilyn, who saw nothing wrong with lesbianism, recoiled more from shock than offense. Marilyn had a strong self-protective instinct and she must have sensed that any intimate involvement with Crawford would lead to big trouble down the road. Although she turned Crawford down, she determined to be discreet about what had happened. Within the next year and a half, her loyalty to the woman would be severely tested.”

In “My Story” Marilyn’s ghosted autobiography here is the chapter entitled: “My Joan Crawford Feud”

I met Joan Crawford at Joe Schenck's house. She was an impressive woman. I admired her during dinner. I hoped that when I was her age I would keep my looks as well as she had. Some movie stars don't seem like stars when you meet them, and some seem more like stars off the screen than on. I don't know which is better, but Miss Crawford was definitely the latter type. She was as much the movie star at Mr. Schenck's dinner table as she could have been electrifying a courtroom in a movie drama-even a little more. I was pleased to see I had made an impression on Miss Crawford. She said to me after dinner, "I think I could help you a great deal if you would let me. For instance that white knitted dress you're wearing is utterly incorrect for a dinner of this kind." It was the only good dress I owned. I wore it evenings as well as daytimes when I was going any place important, and I cleaned it myself every day. I looked at Miss Crawford's beautiful evening gown and understood what she meant. "Taste," Miss Crawford went on, "is every bit as important as looks and figure." She smiled very kindly at me and asked, "Will you let me help you, my dear?" I said I was flattered to have her offer to. We made a date to meet Sunday morning in church. It turned out that Miss Crawford and I went to the same church. After the church service, Miss Crawford said as we met coming out, "I'm so glad to see you. But you mustn't come to church in flat heels and a gray suit with black trimming. If you wear gray you must wear different gray tones, but never black." It was my only suit, but there was no sense defending it on that ground. "Would you like to come to my house with me?" Miss Crawford asked. I said I'd like to very much, and it was arranged that I should follow her car in mine. I was excited at what I thought was going to happen. Miss Crawford, I felt pretty sure, was going to offer me some of her old ball gowns and ensembles that she'd grown tired of. The house was very beautiful and elegant. We had lunch in the kitchen with Miss Crawford's four children and a beautiful white poodle. After lunch, Miss Crawford asked me to come upstairs to her room. "Brown would look very good on you," she said. "I must show you the things I've been knitting." She showed me a number of knitted dickies in different shades of brown and explained that they were to be worn under different shades of brown suits. "The main thing about dressing well," Miss Crawford explained, "is to see that everything you wear is just right- your shoes, stockings, gloves and bag all fit the suit you're wearing. Now what I would like you to do is to make a list of all the clothes in your wardrobe, and I'll make a list of all the things you need to buy and see that you buy the right things." I didn't say anything. I usually didn't mind telling people I was broke and even trying to borrow a few dollars from them to tide me over. But for some reason I couldn't tell Miss Crawford that she had seen my wardrobe in full-the incorrect white knitted dress and the wrong gray suit. "It's so easy not to look vulgar," Miss Crawford assured me, when I was ready to leave. "Do make out a list of all your things and let me guide you a bit. You'll be surprised at the results. And so will everyone else." I don't know why I called Miss Crawford up again, except that I had promised I would. Maybe I was still hoping she would present me with some of her discarded ball gowns. I think, also, I had some intention of telling her the truth about not being able to buy any fancy clothes. But when I heard Miss Crawford's voice on the phone, I had to start palavering as I'd done before. Had I made out that list of my wardrobe? No, I hadn't. That was very lazy of me. Yes, I knew. And I would make the list out in a few days and call her up again. "Good," said Miss Crawford. "I'll be expecting to hear from you." I didn't call Miss Crawford again. In fact, the next time I heard from Miss Crawford was in the newspapers. This was a year later. I'd gone to work at both Century-Fox again, and the Marilyn Monroe boom had started. I was all over the magazines and movie columns, and the fan mail at the studio was arriving in trucks. Among the honors that were now showering on me was the privilege of presenting one of the Oscars to one of the Award winners at the Academy's annual affair. I was frozen with fear the night of the Academy Award Ceremonies. I waited tremblingly for my turn to walk up to the platform and hand over the Oscar in my keeping. I prayed I wouldn't trip and fall and that my voice wouldn't disappear when I had to say my two lines. When my turn came I managed to reach the platform, say my piece, and return to my table without any mishap. Or so I thought until I read Joan Crawford's remarks in the morning papers. I haven't saved the clippings, but I have sort of remembered what she said. She said that Marilyn Monroe's vulgar performance at the Academy affair was a disgrace to all of I Hollywood. The vulgarity, she said, consisted of my wearing a dress too tight for me and wriggling my rear when I walked upholding one of the holy Oscars in my hand. I was so surprised I could hardly believe what I was reading. I called up some friends who had seen me at the ceremony and asked them if it were true. They laughed. It wasn't true, they said. They advised me to forgive a lady who had once been young and seductive herself. I have written out this accurate account of one of my "feuds" because it is typical. The feuds are all started by someone whom I have mysteriously offended-always always a woman. The truth is my tight dress and my wiggling were all in Miss Crawford's mind. She obviously had been reading too much about me. Or maybe she was just annoyed because I had never brought her a list of my wardrobe.

*From my FAQ about whether MY STORY is trustworthy:

My Story is based off of interviews that Ben Hecht conducted with Marilyn in late 1953 and early 1954 for an autobiographical work they were doing together. The project was nipped in the bud after Hecht’s assistant leaked the manuscript to a publisher in England. Marilyn lost faith in the project and the book sat away for decades after her death. It landed in the hands of the Greene family, and they published it in 1974 - 10 years after Hecht’s death. After much digging and consideration, I would not regard it as a factual autobiography. The loose information provided like her childhood, molestation, rise to stardom, relationship with Joe DiMaggio is factual, but I would not take the book word-for-word. It’s also incredibly disappointing that her name, Norma Jeane, is mis-spelled as “Norma Jean.” Marilyn’s niece, confirms this on her website as well:

MYTH: Marilyn wrote an autobiography entitled MY STORY.

FACT: No so. Ben Hecht, a Hollywood writer, concocted a half-baked manuscript based on conversations with Marilyn. The manuscript remained unpublished long after Marilyn’s death. Marilyn’s former business partner Milton Greene had it in his possession. — http://www.monaraemiracle.com/disc.html⁣⁣

In the short version, the story is a myth without factual evidence. Furthermore, there is no proof that Marilyn ever engaged in sex with a woman.

From Marilyn herself:

“A man who had kissed me once had said it was very possible I was a lesbian because I apparently had no response to males-meaning him. I didn't contradict him because I didn't know what I was. There were times even when I didn't feel human and times when all I could think of was dying. There was also the sinister fact that a well-made woman had always thrilled me to look at. Now, having fallen in love, I knew what I was. It wasn't a lesbian.” —My Story, ghost autobiography

Marilyn, however, was very supportive of gay rights, in 1960 she told W.J. Weatherby, (about Montgomery Clift): “People who aren’t fit to open the door for him sneer at his homosexuality. What do they know about it? Labels – people love putting labels on each other. Then they feel safe. People tried to make me into a lesbian. I laughed. No sex is wrong if there’s love in it.”

Following the 1953 Photoplay awards Joan Crawford made nasty comments about Marilyn to the press for her dress choice:

“Certainly her picture isn't doing business, and I'll tell you why. Sex plays a tremendously important part in every person's life. People are interested in it, intrigued with it. But they don't like to see it flaunted in their faces. Kids don't like her. Sex plays a growingly important part in their lives, too; and they don't like to see it exploited. And don't forget the women. They're the ones who pick out the movie entertainment for the family. They won't pick anything that won't be suitable for their husbands and children. The publicity has gone too far, and apparently, Miss Monroe is making the mistake of believing her publicity... She should be told that the public likes provocative feminine personalities; but it also likes to know that underneath it all the actresses are ladies.”

Marilyn’s reaction was:

"I cried all night. I've always admired Miss Crawford for being such a wonderful mother--for taking four children and giving them a fine home. Who better than I to know what that means to homeless little ones?"

#ask

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stonerbughead · 5 years ago

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Maria watches friday night lights (#10)

Ahhh this season is so good, I’m not ready for it to end! This post covers the penultimate episodes: 3x11 - 3x12

-oh boyyy Lyla’s getting drunk to deal with her daddy issues. Real! Tho it is nice seeing Billy, Lyla, Tim, and Mindy getting along I guess? Sigh.

-HAHAHA poor Tyra being forced to throw Mindy a “tea party” bridal shower.

-let’s maybe NOT call your son’s 15 year old girlfriend a “minx” or a “plague,” Joe McCoy?!?!

-oh Matt :( taking out his anger and emotions about his grandma’s deteriorating health on his mom :( this is so hard

-oooooh this redistricting plotline is such an interesting shake up!! Holy shit these fully grown men standing around a table redrawing the redistricting line to “keep the Dillon Panthers intact” is truly wild.

-I really like this scene where Lyla breaks down to Tim about letting her mom and siblings move to California without her and feeling like she has no family now that Buddy has hurt her. I feel like too many teen dramas have a teen character’s family move away and never show it affecting them which feels wholly unrealistic.

-I have to believe Texas weather around semifinals time actually lends itself to dramatic pouring rain?? Bc I mean, it WORKS but this happened in S1 too right?

“He’s got to do what the coach tells him to do!” Thank you Katie McCoy. You need to get away from your terrible, controlling husband. Like, even when they win this dude isn’t happy bc it didn’t happen the WAY he thought it should.

-omfg I just gasped when JD’s dad called Madison a “tramp.” WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU

-and of course Tami and Eric are seated in the window of Applebee’s seeing the abuse happen and run out to help. You know who Tami and Eric remind me of (except they’re better): Kirsten and Sandy Cohen of the OC. It’s that “parents of everyone, moral compass of the community” trope. Honestly like, the only good teen drama parent trope. (To a similar extent I guess Mary and Fred Andrews’ play/ed that role on Riverdale)

“I think I’m okay here, hanging with my gal” - Tim Riggins is such a romantic boy wow. His pep talk for Lyla about going to college despite her dad’s bullshit was so precious.

“He hit my baby.” Oh pooor Katie McCoy, you need to get yourself and your boy away from your husband.

-lol when’s the last time we saw Gracie? Julie’s been absent this ep, she babysitting? Hahaha

-oh yes Tyra deserves this beautiful pep talk from her mom!!

-good on this show for naming what Joe McCoy did as “child abuse” bc YEP. Tami and Eric feeling awful about calling CPS (but being mandated to do so as educators) is such a real and well done conflict.

-omg Matt’s art portfolio!! He wants to go to Chicago for art! I just love the image of Tami, Julie, and Matt flipping through his portfolio ugh yes. Soft.

“It reads like a five page needlepoint pillow.” Lmao Landry and yeah, writing the college essay sucks.

“They have the biggest Van Gogh collection.” Saracen’s a man after my own heart.

FYI I left and Jeff gave me a dab that hit hard (I dramatically said it “killed me”) so the rest of 3x12 and the post was composed whilst I’m even more stoned than usual.

-wow Landry missing the bus the ONE time he drinks damn

-hey I’ve never seen this coach leading the chants on the bus before. Is this like his whole job

-awww Lorraine asking Julie if Matt likes art and she’s like, yeah he loves it! And he’s amazing at it. So cute. Oh wow both of them agreeing they don’t want to “hold him back from anything.”

-My heart! This show does such a good job of showing so many heartwarming dynamics of all kinds.

-ooookay Katie I get why you don’t want to be friends with Tami anymore....but like y’all need parenting classes, your husband is straight up abusive to your child. Also I’m scared for you, please leave that man

-OMFG Tyra lost her virginity at THIRTEEN? That’s so heartbreaking. Also everything she’s screaming about in the car needs to start going into this college essay. Omg is she gonna write about Jason Street getting paralyzed? Real. How many people in this town do you think used that in their college essay?

-Tim and Matt scene THANK YOU I am blessed

-omfg Tyra reading her essay out loud to Landry overlaying Tami and Eric on the field; Julie with baby grace; Saracen and Tim throwing the frisbee; the raucous Colette-riggins family in the car. Beautiful!!! Perfection.

-lol I saw the year 2008 on the game board and realized if this was fall 2008...I was a freshman in high school. JD is my peer.

-omg Joe McCoy has THE douchebag glasses. Classic child abuser am I right

-JD throwing a fit on the field is good fucking characterization bc you mimic what your parents do, especially when you’re a 15 year old kid

-OH SHIT SARACEN’S GOING IN AS QUARTERBACK FOR HIS LAST HALF EVER AS A HIGH SCHOOL FOOTBALL PLAYER??? The drama! The writing!

-YALL I am out here white knuckling it through this state game and I barely understand football and yet...I’m like wow really all you need to do to get me interested in a sport is make me care about the characters playing. Saracen and riggins are working so well together I cry

-damn what a way to go down. They actually turned the game around and a field goal is what made them lose :(

“I wanted everyone’s friends and families to be here tonight when I say this: I have never been more proud of a team than I am right now” oh Eric Taylor what a man

“There’s not a single person in this room who’s ever gonna be the same”’ wow I felt that

-Riggins always seems more contemplative in a Sherpa

#maria watches friday night lights #mine #friday night lights 3x11 #friday night lights 3x12

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peachessashaven · 6 years ago

Text

Sucker - Ben Hardy x Reader

Synopsis: Your best friend, Ben Hardy, was cast as Roger Taylor, the drummer from Queen in one of the most anticipated movies of the year. You were always a sucker for drummers, and turns out, you always will be.

Word Count: 5.6k

A/N: hi soz about this pos - i haven't proof read this bc im lazy af, sorry about this mess i haven't written ffs or one shots in literal y e a r s

i hope u enjoy i guess AHA

Your Uber rolls up the driveway to the set where they were filming ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’, the film your best friend was in. You thank the man who drove you, slid out of the backseat of the car and closed the door firmly to ensure it sealed. You walk up the drive way, large buildings fielding your view. You mention your name to the guard, hoping Ben remembered to put you on the list of visitors.

She handed you the badge with a big smile. “Enjoy your time here!”

You thank her, “Where do you go for the Bohemian Rhapsody set?”

“You turn left at the end of the street and then keep going. You’ll definitely see the sign, someone else will be able to help you there.” She points and clasps her hands together.

“Thank you again!”

You take her directions, following to the end of the street then turning left. She was right, the large sign in front of your eyes showed the four boys, with Rami Malek starring as Freddie looking towards the camera. You gaze at the photo for a few seconds, finding yourself staring at Ben. You smile as you recall the memory of finding out Ben got the part as Roger Taylor in the biopic.

He was fidgeting, something he only did when he was nervous.

“Ben, what’s up? Why are you shaking your leg so much?” You joke, hitting his leg with your foot. He looked up at you and smiled timidly.

“I find out whether I have a job for the next few months.” You looked at him in shock. Since when did he go for an audition? “I went when you were out with your mum for the day, you know, the spa day you so desperately needed - to help you de-stress from work?” You blush, not meaning to say those words out loud. “Why else do I have a drum kit in my living room?” He points to the obviously placed drum kit in the corner of the large living room.

“I just thought you were getting lessons.” You pout, crossing your arms with a small smile.

“I was, I was getting lessons so many times during the week, multiple times a day, hours at a time. They asked me if I could play drums, and I said ‘yes’, you know, like a liar. Since when did you not notice me being out almost every day for the past few weeks?” Ben chuckles, pulling your legs on top of his lap, rubbing your ankles. You smile slightly at the comment, but then you remembered why you didn’t notice as much as to where he goes.

“Since your ex-girlfriend told me that I don’t need to know your whereabouts every second of every day, since that was ‘her job’ to worry where you were all the damn time, as if she didn’t trust that you were out with friends and not another girl,” Emphasising the last few words while grumbling, you try to pull your legs off of his lap, he shakes his head and pulls them back. “Sorry that I care about my friends?” You exclaim sarcastically. Ben laughs and rubs your ankles again. “Plus! I thought you were out with friends all the time or helping your family.”

“It’s fine now, she’s out of my life and you’re the only girl I care about at the moment, well, except my mum-.” He gets cut off by the sound of his phone ringing, loud and clear.

He pushes your legs off from him and stands up with lightning speed, causing you to scoff with a smile.

“That’s gotta be my agent, I’ll be back!” He runs off into the kitchen with his phone. You give him a small salute, whispering to yourself ‘yes sir’. You stand up and walk over to the drum kit, seeing many drumsticks in the holder, the broken ones in the bin – probably from hitting the drums too hard or from frustration. You giggle at the thought of him throwing a drumstick in frustration, then feeling bad for throwing it and walking to pick it back up. That’s just the kind of person he is, honestly. You pictured him playing the drums, getting flushed at the idea of him slamming the sticks against the drums with desperation and vigour.

“Are you serious?” You heard Ben yell. You zip around to see him standing at the doorway to the living room with a gigantic smile on his face. “Thank you very much! I’ll see you next week!” He concludes and ends the phone call. He throws his phone to the couch and raises his hands, in accomplishment. “I got the role! I get to play Roger Taylor in the new Queen biopic!”

“You’re playing Roger Taylor?!” You scream with him, running to throw yourself into his arms, he wraps himself around you, placing a kiss on your head. You can feel his heart racing and he’s shaking. He didn’t think to mention he was playing one of the band members in your favourite band? Idiot, he is, isn’t he? He knew you loved drummers.

“Fuck yeah I am, I thought I botched the second audition! I’m so fucking excited!”

You saw many people running around with props and papers, people hanging onto their phones for dear life as they run from building to building. You walk slowly up to one of the entrances of the many buildings surrounding you. You look behind you, admiring how chaotic this whole scene looked but before you know it, you’re bumping into a tall man with bouncing curly hair, causing him to drop his pages on the floor.

“Fuck, I’m so sorry!” You apologise, picking up the booklet before he could even register what just happened. You glance at the booklet, seeing a name and the words ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’ written in large letters. “Here’s your script.” He smiles and takes the script off of you.

“Thank you for that, sorry for bumping into you.”

“No, it was so my fault! I wasn’t looking where I was walking!” You claimed, feeling heat rise up your neck from the embarrassment. “I’m just trying to find my friend, Ben Jones? Or Hardy? Whichever one he goes by now, I guess.” You scratch your neck slightly and look up at him. He has a look of surprise on his face.

“Oh! You must be Y/N L/N, right?” You nod suspiciously. “Ben’s told us so much about you! I’m Gwilym! I play Brian May,” he gestures towards the abundance of hair on his head.

“Wow! I didn’t recognise you with the hair, oh my goodness, you really do look like Brian May when he was younger,” You ponder, he smiles and gives you a nod. “Ben’s told me about you guys on the phone!”

“Here, let me take you to Ben, I’m sure we can find where he is.” He takes your hand and pulls you into the area where they were filming. You saw the cameras, the lights and the crowds of people wearing clothes you only wished would suit you. You smile as you see Ben sitting with a man with curly hair, who you assumed to be Joe and Rami. Gwilym saw them also, yelling out to them.

“Oi, Ben, your girly friend is here!”

“What?” Ben looks up from his phone, almost sprinting out of his seat as soon as he sees you. “Y/N! I can’t believe you made it!” He hugs you tightly with a grin on his face. “You didn’t say you were visiting today?”

“I did say I would visit you some time,” You choke as he squishes the air out of your lungs. He had to move into a hotel room in the city to shoot this movie. You hadn’t seen him in 6 weeks, you’d begun to miss your best friend. It didn’t bother you as much at first, you took care of Frankie at your place, it was like a little piece of Ben was still with you, but in the form of an adorable dog. But as the time went on, you felt a little lonely without him there to bag the shit out of you.

“Yeah, but I didn’t think you could get off from work, I thought your boss wanted you to stay for longer hours.” He furrows his eyebrow.

“Well, I may or may not have chucked a sickie and need to go to the doctors after seeing you, because I had a massive migraine and couldn’t go into work today?” You smiled cheekily, he shook his head with a smirk.

“Only you would do that, L/N,” He put his hand on your shoulder, caressing it lightly, a soft smile played on his lips.

“Uh, Ben, are you going to introduce me to your little friend?” Joe walked up to you, curly hair bouncing as he walked. “I thought I was the only person in your life,” he adds dramatically.

“Joe, Rami, Gwilym, this is my best friend since we were in Primary School, Y/N,” Ben announces proudly.

You smile and give a small wave. “Hi guys,” you squeak nervously. Joe smiles and gives you a hug.

“Don’t you try to steal my Benny Boy away from me!” He laughs, pulls off from hugging you to hug Ben from the side. Ben stands there with a smile.

“He’s just joking, aren’t you, Joe?”

“Oh, yeah totally!” He fakes, when Ben looks away, he glares jokingly at you with a shake of his head. You giggle slightly and nod your head with a thumbs up. Ben looks at Joe, who acts like nothing happened. Ben pushes Joe’s head away with a laugh.

Rami walks up to you, his full Freddie gear on, even the teeth look amazing.

“Hello darling, how are you?”

“I’m great now! I’ve been stressed at work, but nothing like a day off to see my best friend at work!” He smiles at you, hearing his name yelled by the director and bids you a farewell. Gwilym and Joe follow suit after the director called them too. You smile awkwardly as you point at Ben’s hair.

“What’s with all this! It looks great on you!” you play with a few strands of the wig.

“Should I grow my hair out? Would it look this good?” he poses a little, flashing a blue steel, making you cackle out of pure happiness.

“Definitely not, the makeup and costume department are amazing here, oh my gosh! They’ve really made you into Roger, huh?” You point at the vest that shows his open and toned chest. How did you not notice this before?

“You think so? Well, Roger almost did a double take as soon as he saw me dressed as him from the 70’s.” Ben chuckles as you stare at him with your mouth wide open. “Hey, Y/N/N, you’re gonna catch flies if you keep your mouth like that.” He goes to close your mouth, you slap his arm.

“Roger fucking Taylor is here?” You whisper, trying not to draw attention to yourself.

“Yes, he is, as well as Brian May. They’re consultants for the movie,” He points out, rubbing his arm. “You really didn’t do much research, did you?” Ben chuckles and pushes you slightly.

“I’d like to surprise myself when the movie comes out,” You look down, but catching yourself staring at Ben’s chest. “And if I cry, you can’t judge me.”

“Ben! Stop talking to your little girlfriend and come back on set!” The director yells with a smile, causing Ben to look back and nod towards him.

“I gotta go back on set, you can just sit back and watch, I guess,” He smiles and runs back to the drum kit that’s at the back of the set. You see Gwil and Joe laughing to each other – looking in your direction. They grin at you and wave, you wave back meekly. Taking a few steps around the wires and poles, you get a better view of the stage.

You smile as you see Joe dressed as Deaky, Gwil as Brian and Rami as Freddie. They really did cast people who looked like the members in the 70’s, you feel as if you want to thank the casting directors for that sole reason. Your eyes fall back on Ben as Roger, you’ve got to admit, Ben’s hot as himself, but extremely hot as Roger too.

You shake your head as you hear the music in the background. ‘Fat Bottomed Girls’ – a song you loved, it made you feel good about your body – which you didn’t feel great about in the first place, a song you can dance around in just a shirt and underwear with socks on your feet in the kitchen while cooking dinner by yourself.

You hear them stop and start the song many times, getting different takes from different angles. You switch your gaze from the camera, to the director and finally landing on the boys. Ben’s slamming the drums, looking into the makeshift crowd, singing occasionally. Your breathing stopped, struggling to swallow the saliva that seemed to pool in your mouth.

Ben caught your eye, winking at you and continuing to play the drums with all his might. He looked great, amazing, perfect – sexy even. You blushed and walked away from set, wiggling your body to the sound of the music in the background. You walked outside to get some fresh air. You fanned yourself as you nodded towards the workers who were looking at you with strange stares.

After about five minutes, you went back to the set and see Ben’s eyes light up as soon as you are in his peripheral vision. He gives one final hit to the cymbal, finishing off the song and getting up in a stance where his arm is raised with his drumsticks in his hand, a legendary grin on his face. His vest lifts and shows more of his torso, you look down stop yourself from looking at him, playing with the hem of your shirt.

“Cut! Alright everybody, well done, you get an hour and a half break, use it wisely!” The director yells to the cast, pulling off the headphones, speaking to what appears to be his personal assistant. The boys walk up to you, with a girl by Rami’s side, you assume she’s Lucy.

“How was my drumming, Hun?” Ben mutters cheekily.

“It was great! Honestly, I am such a sucker for drummers.” You say with a flirty smile. He cackles and hits your shoulder with his.

“Would you like to get lunch with us?”

“Sure, why not?”

Sitting down next to Ben and Joe, Ben pulls his phone out and furrows his eyebrow. “Joe, are you fucking kidding me?” He laughs. Rami looks up from his phone, Lucy and Gwil stop talking to each other to listen.

“What happened?”

“I did nothing!” Joe exclaims.

“You took a photo of Y/N and I and posted it to your Instagram stories, you dickhead,” Ben tries to hold in his laughter as he shows you the photo. You and Ben are looking at each other, smiling and arms linked together. It says, “she took my ben away, luckily I have a ben at home :)” You cackle and put your hand over your mouth after hearing the noise come from your mouth. Embarrassed, you cover your face and let out a muffled scream.

“What the hell, Joe?” You say in between giggles and gasps.

“Hey, you two looked cute, I wanted to capture it and put it out into the world!”

“We ain’t cute, I ain’t cute,” You say, with a ‘matter of fact’ tone.

“Do you want to fight me on this, because I will,” Lucy comments, “You are freaking cute, oh my goodness! Your boyfriend must fall at your knees!”

“Oh no, I’m actually very single, and have been for a very long time.”

“For how long?” Lucy asks, genuinely curious. You look at Ben with an eyebrow raised.

“Ben, how old am I?”

“Oh, shut up, you have had many dates!”

“But I seem to scare them all off! It’s like as soon as I kind of like them, and they seem to be even slightly interested in me, they run off as soon as they meet my friends!” Ben smirks at this comment, chuckling to himself. You eye him suspiciously, “Do you have anything to do with me being single this very moment? Because when my last date met you, I went to the bathroom and he was gone when I came out!”

“I do nothing to them, I just tell them what’ll happen if they break your heart! They seem to get the point and leave,” Ben smirks, leaning back in his seat and puts his arm around your chair. You turn to him and hit his stomach. You look a little sad, Gwilym sees this and changes the subject to something that is supposed to happen on set. You keep eating, giving Gwilym a small nod to thank him. Joe pokes you slightly, you turn to him. You felt Ben move his hand to your shoulder and squeezed slightly, you put your hand on his.

“You okay? I can delete the story if you want,” he murmurs, I shake my head and give him a smile.

“No need, it’s already out there in the world, may as well deal with the consequences tomorrow.”

You’d quickly excused yourself from the set at about 7pm to get that medical certificate you needed for work, the doctor had told you to take off today and tomorrow and see how you feel after that. You’d made it back to the set before they all started to pack up and leave for the day, it was 10pm. Were you gone for that long?

Ben saw you once again and pulled you to his trailer, his wig was gone, and his costume had changed into something that was a deemed ‘appropriate’ for this century. You’d never say this out loud, but you missed the long mop of hair on his head, it did him wonders.

“You can come back to my hotel with me if you’d like, the guys and Lucy are coming back, we’re going to have a couple of drinks,” he tells me as he pulls his leather jacket over the maroon jumper he’s wearing. He grabs his bag and heads to the door, you following shortly after him.

“Uh, I guess? I mean, the doctor gave me off tomorrow as well,” You mumble as you pull your phone out to text your boss. “Where would I sleep though?”

“With me in my bed, of course, I wouldn’t invite you to sleep at my hotel to make you sleep on couch, Love,” He pulls you close and hugs you tightly, “I’m not that much of an asshole.” He smirks and kisses your forehead.

“Ben! Are we going back to your hotel? Or might we leave you with your lady friend?” Joe yells from the other side of the road, closing and locking his trailer. He laughs loudly seeing your very clear confused expression.

“Fuck off,” He laughs, “Yeah mate, I’ll meet you there!” Ben looks back to you, with a quirked eyebrow. “You ready?”

“Yeah, I think all my stuff is in here,” Quickly checking your handbag you nodded, your phone, a portable charger and your purse were all there, as well as the unnecessary pads, tampons, makeup wipes and Panadol, you can’t be too careful, can you? He nods back at you and puts his arm around you as you two walk to the car park, kissing your hair. You instantly lean into him, and you would say to him that it’s for warmth, but any excuse to get close to Ben.

You arrive at Ben’s hotel, becoming increasingly tired, just wanting to crawl up into a ball. You yawn, three times in a row, tears welling up in your eyes. You try to blink them away while sniffling. Ben looks at you with concern on your face.

“What’s wrong?” He grabs your shoulders, looking down at you with his eyebrows furrowed. He pushes your hair behind your ear, leaving his hand there.

“Oh! Nothing, I’m just really tired and when I yawn, I cry,” You laugh as the others burst through the door. Joe instantly turns to you, noticing the redness in your eyes.

“Ben! What did you do to this wonderful woman?”

“Nothing, she’s just tired,” he turns back to you, “Do you want to go to bed? We’ll try our best to be quiet.”

“No, no, it’s fine, I’ll have a few drinks and then go to bed. I’ll be fine...” You trail off, yawning once more.

“You’re going to bed and that’s final,” Ben says, turning to the group. “I’ll put her to bed, you guys get started without me.” Ben drags you to the hotel bedroom, which was down the hall from the lounging area and kitchen. He didn’t bother turning on the light, the lights from the windows were enough to see the general whereabouts of everything. He bends down to his suitcase and throws you a pair of tracksuit pants and a tank top. “Change into that, it’s comfier than what you’re wearing, Sweetheart.” He points at your outfit - leggings, a black spaghetti strap top with a forest green woollen cardigan and boots.

You blush a little at the endearment, “What are you on about? Leggings are so comfy, I can’t wear any other pants out.”

“I’d rather you not wear those to bed, you deserve to change into something fresh.”

He stands in the room still, not seeming to want to leave. You stare at him with an awkward smile. “Does that mean you’re gonna leave, or…”

“Oh yeah, sorry, I’ll be outside the door, just yell out when you’re done, Love.” You quickly change into the clothes he gave you, whipping off your shirt, taking off your bra and placing it on the floor next to the bed. The pants he gave you were a tight fit, so you just took them off and placed them back into the suitcase.

You pulled the shirt down to cover yourself, being only in his shirt and underwear, you sat cross-legged on the bed, the blanket covering your legs. You call out his name, thinking for a second that he went to his friends, but when he opened the door, you smiled. He looked down at his suitcase and saw the pants tucked back in there. He looks at you - frowning.

“They were kind of tight on me, so I didn’t wear them… You were always thinner than me, Hun,” You smile.

“So, what have you got on?”

You are glad it’s dark in his room, otherwise he would see the large blush creep onto your cheeks and over your neck. “I’m just wearing my leggings,” you lie. You never even liked to wear long pants when sleeping, even he should know that by now. “Thank you for this Ben, I’ve missed you a lot.” You smile, a yawn slowing your speech.

“I’ve missed you so much as well, Love, I’m glad we got to see each other.” He walks over to you and sits on the bed. He kisses your forehead, pushing a strand of hair behind your ear, staring intensely into your eyes. You can’t help but notice when his eyes flicker to your lips and back to your eyes that you do the seem to do the same, a light pink shading your cheeks as you notice his breathing become faster.

You tried your best to not kiss him and apparently your body heard your pleas, so to ruin the moment, you let out a huge yawn, causing you both to break contact. He lets out a nervous chuckle. “You should be going to bed, darling, you’re very tired.” He pats your cheek and stands up from the spot on the bed he was in. You nod, eyes fluttering shut as you’re still sitting up. “Love - lie down before you fall asleep,” he laughs.

“Oh yeah, that would probably help,” your head crashes down onto the pillow, almost instantly putting you to sleep. You hear keys jangle and a ripping sound, then feeling a wipe over your face. “Thanks for taking off my makeup. I’m surprised you knew they were there,” You mutter sleepily at him, he smiles down at you. Your eyes close once again while you hear a faint “I love you” come from the door, but you’re too tired to answer back.

You wake up at 3am when you roll over to the other side of the bed. Ben hadn’t occupied the other side. Your hair was all over the place and sweat covered your face and body, the blanket thrown off to the end of the bed.

You stand up, walking out of the bedroom of the hotel. Not hearing any sound come from the lounging area, you tip toe out to see Ben on his phone, watching the T.V with no noise, but with subtitles. He really did try to keep the noise minimal as possible. He must’ve sensed someone was there and whipped his head around to see you standing there, one of your hands rubbing your eyes. He let out a small chuckle at the sight of you.

“Hey there, sleeping beauty, how’d you sleep?”

You fought off saying ‘great until I felt you weren’t there when I woke up’, instead saying “It was okay, why aren’t you asleep yet?”

“Eh, I haven’t felt the need to go to bed yet,” he stretched, turning off the T.V. “Now I do though,” He stands up and looks at your legs. “You were wearing leggings, my ass,” a sarcastic tone runs through his voice. You look down and shrug.

“It got really hot in the room, I took them off at one point.” You lie again, you’d bombed as soon as you got the chance, “where is everyone? I thought you guys would’ve woken me up at some point.”

“We had a few drinks, congratulated each other on a great job on set, but everyone got tired after their 3rd or 4th drink, so they all went home. I didn’t drink though, didn’t feel the need to.”

“Oh, okay,” you mumble. Ben walks up to you, towering over you, you crane your neck to look at him. “I want to go back to bed, you coming?”

“Right behind you, Love.”

You two walk back to the bedroom, you instantly crashing onto the bed and curling up, Ben chuckles as he sees you spoon the blanket, cuddling yourself into it. Ben strips to his boxers and throws them in a direction he’ll probably regret in the morning.

He gets into the other side of the bed, almost hesitantly. He looks at the way you’re situated on the bed, admiring how you can fall asleep almost instantly, anywhere. He turns to face the way you’re facing, his arms crossing against his chest as he sees your chest rise and fall.

You stir a little bit, turning yourself over so you’re facing Ben. You open your eyes and see him staring at you, smiling as you admire the way he’s looking at you. Almost as if he’s looking at you with love and adoration in his eyes. He doesn’t seem phased with you seeing him stare at you, as if he wants you to know.

You don’t notice, but he scoots closer to you, resting his hand on your cheek. His eyes flicker to your lips and eyes, back and forth constantly. He opens his mouth and lets out a desperate sigh. “Just tell me to stop if you don’t want this,” he whispers, but you don’t.

You let his lips fall onto yours, gently and lovingly. You instantly move your lips against his, placing your legs between his as they twine together. He caresses your cheek, moving deeper and deeper into the kiss. You pull away to catch your breath, “Why’d you do that?” You ask with confusion.

“Did I completely misread the situation?” He breathes.

“I didn’t realise there was a situation to begin with, Hun,” you place your hand on his chest, feeling his heart beating faster. He chuckles slightly, placing his hand on your waist. The movement caused you to let out a jagged breath, you swallowed thickly. You look up at him with pleading eyes, “Kiss me again?”

He didn’t answer, he immediately placed his lips in between yours, sighing in delight. He pulls your waist closer to his, you throw your leg over to the other side of his, climbing onto his lap – straddling him. The movement caused you both to deepen the kiss – the kiss that made you dizzy, that made your legs weak, made your head fuzzy. What was happening and why did you want to stay like this?

Both of his hands were placed on your waist, squeezing at times to comfort your trembling knees. One of your hands were grasping his hair, the other on his chest still – you pull slightly at his hair, causing him to let out a small moan. You smile into the kiss as you begin to pull away, his lips trying to chase yours to not end the fun you two were having. He lets out an annoyed huff as you press a chaste kiss to his lips.

“What are we doing?” You laugh, slightly out of breath.

“Well, I think it’s time I told you that I love you – more than a friend and I hope that you feel the same way.” He places his hands on your thighs, rubbing up and down in a comforting way.

“That was so nonchalant – I would have been shitting myself,” You gaze at him – seeing love in his eyes, something you yearned to see from his eyes.

“Oh, I am, but I’d prefer not to show it. Especially with a gorgeous lady on my lap.”

“Well, you might be delighted to know that I actually love you too – surprisingly,” you shrug and smile.

“Well, I’m glad.”

You both had fallen asleep cuddling into each other, feeling the breaths and heartbeats of each other. By the morning, your arm was slung over his body, your leg perched into his and head on his chest – his arm under your neck and his head leaning on yours. The blinds were kept open –the natural sunlight waking the two of you up. He smiled down at you seeing you stare at his chest, your fingers tracing circles around his abs.

“Good morning, Love,” He gives you a kiss on the forehead, another on your nose and a peck on your lips. “I still have to go onto set, you want to come again?” You nod, too sleepy still to talk. He got up and before closing the door to the bedroom, he looked back to you, “I’ll let you wake up a little, I know how cranky you are in the morning – if you want a shower, just let me know. We’ll leave in an hour,” he closes the door.

You let out a small squeal as you remembered that Ben fucking Jones loves you back. You had believed the love was one sided, unrequited, unwanted. You smiled as you realise that wasn’t the case. You stood up and quickly got changed, keeping the shirt Ben gave you on. You’d thrown your hair into a messy ponytail as Ben walked in the door again, wet hair, beads of water dripping down his chest and a towel hanging low on his hips.

“I forgot my clothes - did you want a shower?” He asked, looking to you for an answer.

You’d forgotten how to talk – looking at Ben’s body, “Uh…” was all you muttered, as if you were real life buffering. You’d somehow snapped out of it, looking at him with a cherry shaded blush on your cheeks and ears. “Sorry, uh, I don’t shower in the morning, I shower at night, so I’m okay, thanks. I will need to borrow deodorant though.” You smile cheesily, “I really am a sucker for you, huh?”

“I thought it was only drummers?” A smug smile slips onto his lips.

“Oh, no, it was always you, Sweetheart,” You giggle, he walks over to you giving you quick kiss, but you wrapped your hand into his wet hair, pulling him closer. He pulled away slightly with a slightly concerned look on his face, “Do I get to call you mine now?”

“You could’ve called me yours, long ago, Jones.”

You arrived at the movie set, your hand set in Ben’s, chuckling to yourselves. Joe had seen you two walk in, immediately rushing you away from Ben. “I know why Ben kept pushing away those dates you had with those guys!” He rushes out.

“Oh really, what is it?” You say – struggling to keep from laughing. You’d realised why he didn’t let you go out with those guys last night. Ben walks up to you and wraps his arm around your waist, Joe almost goes to say something to him until he sees Ben kiss your lips.

“I’ll see you in a bit, my love, I need to get into costume, come to the makeup department when you’ve finished talking to Joe,” he smirks, kissing you one last time before walking off. Joe is pointing half heartedly with his mouth wide open.

“Well, at least you two finally sorted your fucking shit out.”

#ben hardy fluff #ben hardy!roger taylor #ben hardy x reader #ben hardy/reader #ben hardy as roger taylor #ben hardy best friends #ben hardy #joe mazzello #rami malek #gwilym lee #lucy boynton #ben hardy imagine #ben hardy one shot #bohemian rhapsody cast #bohemian rhapsody #borhap cast #bohemian rapsody movie

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zodiacal-dust-and-curls · 6 years ago

Text

Meant to Be

Word Count: 3.3k

Warnings: None that I can think of. Let me know if you see any!

A/N: I hope y’all are ready. This is a little ridiculous, but I had fun writing it. The reader’s character has a name! But her perspective will be in second person and physical description will be vague. (Sorry, I needed a pretty distinct name for this.)

Thank you to @im-justatrashcan for the request and as always a big thank you to my proof-reader and PSM @mollymarymarie

All your life, you’d had the name ‘Ben Jones’ written in black ink on the inside of your wrist. A common place for a soulmark, really. Absolutely nothing out of the ordinary about it. Including the name.

It was very frustrating, honestly. It had exhausted you since you were thirteen and everyone else started meeting their soulmates left and right, literally. You’d watched both of your best friends, at the ripe old age of 15, turn opposite directions and bump into their soulmates. From that day forward, their marks had been so beautifully colored and their soulmates never too far away.

But ‘Ben Jones’? That was like finding a needle in a haystack. Your wrist might as well have said ‘John Smith’. It haunted you.

By the midpoint of senior year, ninety percent of your schoolmates had found their other halves and you were still alone.

Then one day, in early 2012, you noticed something. Your mark no longer said ‘Ben Jones’. It now read ‘Ben Hardy’ and you felt like life was just about to get more complicated.

Ben had always wondered how he’d meet you, the mysterious ‘Cheyenne Williams’. Tattooed on his tricep, destined to be his forever. Just from your name, he could tell you weren’t English.

It excited him. He always wondered where life would take him, and he knew for sure he’d get to travel at least part of the world.

Growing up, he was never too concerned with meeting his soulmate. Lots of his friends met theirs between 13 and 18. But it never seemed to bother him. He knew he’d find you one day. It certainly seemed like it wouldn’t be anywhere near his home.

When he started his career, he worried about you being able to find him. He had to change his name, there was just no way around it. Even if it was just a stage name, it would still be the easiest way to recognize him.

He worried over something else, too. Because of his career choice, he’d need to cover his mark. It felt like he was hiding you from the world. Even though he hadn’t met you, he never wanted you to think he could be ashamed of you. That just wasn’t true. He just didn’t want anyone to lie to him and use your name to hurt either of you. It was hard to explain your motives to someone you still hadn’t met.

You were the only one that noticed the change in your mark. As long as the first word was ‘Ben’ and it was still black, no one else really seemed to care. Which, helped you avoid a lot of trouble, honestly.

You really had to fight the urge to google the new name. The development had you stuck somewhere between worry and wonder. Worry for your soulmate’s safety, could something have happened to him? Wonder for yourself, had anyone else ever had their mark change?

The best course of action was to not call any attention to it. You didn’t want to become a case study. There was absolutely no one that would be helped by that. Well, out of the people you were truly concerned for (yourself and your soulmate), no one would probably be helped.

Years after the change, only your mother and best friend had noticed. It took them months to see any difference at all, and it wasn’t the mark that caught their eye. It was your demeanor. The girl with a slightly bitter heart and too many choices had finally seemed hopeful. It threw each of them for a loop, but they’d each asked as curiosity got the best of them.

One day in 2016, your best friend, Tyler, convinced you to see a movie with her. She seemed really excited about it. She said it was going to restart the X-Men franchise and give rise to a whole new generation of superheroes. With all her excitement about the film, you couldn’t say no.

That’s how you found yourself transfixed on the pouty blond angel only a few minutes into the movie. You couldn’t quite put your finger on it, but you felt like you’d seen him before. Somewhere. . . But where?

To say that Ben was a little disappointed that he didn’t find you while shooting his first American film wouldn’t be incorrect. He tried to reassure himself that he’d only seen a small part of the country during pre- and post-production, and there would be plenty more to see later. His career was just starting, really.

There was still plenty of time.

Oh my God. Was that really him? You were so glad that Tyler had run to the restroom immediately after the post-credit scene. You needed to talk yourself out of this. Now.

There was no way your soulmate was an actor. Let alone one that had acted alongside some of your favorites. What am I gonna do? What am I gonna do? What am I gonna d-

“Chy? You look a little lost there. Are you okay?” Tyler was back. Oh man, this could be really bad.

“I’m fine, Ty.” You smiled at her, storing all your thoughts away to freak out over later. “Let’s go get dinner, yeah? That movie was crazy long.”

With a roll of her eyes, she agreed. “Leave it to my bestie, with the freaky Mark, excuse me, the mutant Mark, to have that look on her face because she’s hungry.”

You just stuck your tongue out at her and promised yourself that you would check his IMDB later for interviews. Maybe life would be interesting after all.

By mid 2018, Ben still hadn’t met you. He felt like he’d traveled a fair bit. Met new and exciting people. But you were the only person he was just dying to meet.

Okay, maybe that had changed for a hot minute in 2017. He was cast to play a living legend. Could you really blame him for wanting to meet Roger Taylor (the drummah from Queen)?

Ben decided you could probably let that slide. It was just one small request on his growing pile of things to ask forgiveness for.

Hopefully, the upcoming press tour would help him out.

Except that he wouldn’t be going on the American leg of the tour (all the boys had agreed that the name was definitely American, more than likely Southern) due to work. Fate, what game were you playing?

Stalking may have been a tad excessive to describe the ferocity with which you watched a certain Mr. Hardy from that fateful day in the movie theater to now.

You’d looked up several of his interviews, especially any that mentioned his mark, or rather lack thereof. He never brought it up on his own and always seemed ready to deflect with some other comment when asked. There was no way he was your soulmate. He clearly was just one of the UnMarked and wasn’t comfortable talking about it.

It hadn’t even shown up in any of the candids or BTS content you’d seen. He just didn’t have one. It was that simple.

That didn’t stop you though. You still managed to see all his projects. The latest one seemed promising. He was set to play Roger Taylor, yes the Roger Taylor your own mother was in love with as a young girl, and they would even have a press tour stop close to your home town.

Ty had, of course, figured everything out that first day and encouraged you to chase it.

(“He could just be a really private person, Chy. What if he covered it up to protect you?

“Right Ty, I’m sure that’s exactly what some English actor that knows nothing about me did.”

Tyler just narrowed her eyes at you, wishing you would regain a little of the hopefulness you’d had back when the change had happened. “I’m right. Just you wait.”

“I certainly will wait, but don’t expect me to hold my breath.”)

So, you and Tyler had made plans to go to the stop. It could be fun, and maybe you’d finally know if she was right.

“Cheyenne Montgomery Williams, get out of the bathroom or you are gonna miss the whole thing. Jeez.” Ty screamed through the door at you. What were you even doing here? He wouldn’t be here and you knew he didn’t have a mark. He’d never confirm that in interviews, but you just knew it.

“First of all, that’s not my name and you know it.” You pushed the door open with enough force to bump Ty back a little and leveled her with a narrowed glare. “Secondly, so what if I missed the whole thing? He isn’t here.”

“Excuse me?” You heard a voice come from your side. “What did you say your name was?”

You looked in the direction of the voice and released Ty from your stare. “I didn’t. She -,” you used your head to gesture to Ty, hands still poised on your hips and stopped. Joe Mazzello was looking at you with a ridiculous amount of glee in his eyes.

Ben’s phone buzzed from beside him. It was late evening in Rome, where he was filming his newest project.

Joey: Oh, Benny Boy. You aren’t going to believe this.

Benny Boy: Believe what?

Joey: On second thought, I’ve decided not to tell you.

Yet.

When will you be able to visit me in the states?

Ben just shook his head. He was sure Joe had good motives, but all he wanted to do after this film was go home and sleep for a few days. He missed his bed and his Frankie.

Benny Boy: We talked about this.

I’m going to go home for a bit. I can come visit you in December.

Joey: That’s so far awayyyyy.

But I shall wait for you.

Until then, Jonesy.

JM: Are you ready?

The CW: Nope.

JM: Perfect. It’s showtime.

You had just pulled up to the shop Joe had been bothering you about. The man loved donuts and apparently these were the best in Dallas. It was a bit too far from your hometown for you to be overly familiar with the area, but you allowed Joe his indulgences.

It was weird to think that you got a celebrity’s phone number. Much less for such innocent reasons. He really did just want to check on you and figure out who you were before he introduced you to Ben. There was a good chance Joe was more nervous than you were.

“Mate, why am I filming you eat this donut?” It was the one question Ben felt Joe could actually answer. It wasn’t the only question he had, just the only one he thought he could get an answer to.

“It’s going to be transcendent.” Joe fixed his gaze on the prize in his hand, which was possibly the shiniest donut Ben had ever seen. “ Just shut up and point the camera at my face, Jonesy.”

“Really, Joe? Is that anyway to treat your friend?” Ben could have sworn he’d heard that voice before. It sounded like home, but with a drawl.

“Really, Joe? Is that anyway to treat your friend?” You smiled at Joe over the blond head in front of him.

“You know what, Chy? I think it is.” He couldn’t help but grin back at you. “Besides, this one,” he gestured to the man seated in front of him, “has kept the both of us waiting long enough. Don’t you think?”

It seemed like it took him an eternity to turn around and face you. But when he did, you couldn’t look away. Those eyes, the same ones you’d seen all those years ago projected in front of you, were even more breathtaking in person. The mouth that you’d watched form countless words in dozens of interviews, was right there and you waited for it to move.

“I think you’re absolutely right, Joey.” But you couldn’t tear your gaze from Ben. He was here. He was real. It was finally time to see if Ty was right.

“Cheyenne?” He breathed out with a sense of wonder, as if trying your name for the first time.

“Cheyenne?” Ben couldn’t believe this was what Joe had been hiding from him for 2 months. It was you. He found you, the only thing that was still missing from his life.

“It’s very nice to finally meet you, Ben.” Your voice was like music to his ears, especially when you said his name. He didn’t think he could ever get tired of the sound.

He had honestly never tried to imagine you, and he’s very glad he didn’t. Whatever he would have dreamed up wouldn’t have been as good as what was standing in front of him now.

Hesitantly, Ben stepped toward this astonishing woman that was meant to be his. Joe was basically forgotten behind him as Ben moved in to hug you.

The next thing you knew the two of you were moving towards each other. You reached out and hooked your right forearm behind his left shoulder and pulled Ben to you.

Distantly, you could hear Joe cheering. Two of his new favorite people were finally together. First contact had been made. It was finally time to see if Ty and Joe were both right or if they’d just been feeding you false hope all these years (and months).

But he didn’t intervene immediately. Joe let the two of you lose yourselves in the embrace. You were grateful for that. After 20+ years of waiting, at times not so patiently, you felt like you’d finally found your home.

“Okay, lovebirds. You don’t have to completely disentangle, but there’s something I gotta see.” Ah, Joe. He’d waited as long as he possibly could. But Ben supposed he was owed this. To be the first to see his colored Mark.

Ben felt a little wistful for not taking a minute to admire it in the mirror this morning. He wished he would have known that he’d never see the familiar black script on his skin again. It had been replaced with some vibrant color. He was sure of it, and the possibilities of the new discovery left him a little giddy.

Slowly, Ben pulled you to his right and twisted his left arm forward. Sure enough, there in a jeweled red was the name he’d been looking at all his life. But now he had new hope attached to it.

Joe was possibly the most impatient person you knew at this moment. All you wanted to do was hang on to Ben a little longer. You weren’t ready for reality to come crashing down on you.

Ben slowly pulled you to your left and started to twist his arm.

You decided it was time to take the plunge and glanced down at your right wrist. There in a striking red was his name.

The sight brought tears to your eyes. You thought this day would never come. You thought that Fate had been playing a cruel trick on your whole life. But here it was. Living proof.

“Oh. love. Don’t cry.” Ben heard a sniffle come from your direction. He paused his celebrating to take care of his soulmate. He really could get used to that, his soulmate. “What’s wrong?”

“I just,” you were still fighting tears in the little shop, “I just never thought this day would actually come.”

To hear that broke Ben’s heart. He had always justified his actions to himself (hiding his mark, deflecting in interviews, letting Roger Taylor take your spot as the #1 person he wanted to meet) and now it was time to justify them to you.

“Let’s get out of here, yeah?” Ben rested his forehead against your own. “We can go talk somewhere private.” His voice had softened and taken on a concerned undertone.

“That sounds good. Let’s go.” You waved towards Joe and blew him a kiss. You could see the excitement on his face for the both of you. He was a good friend, truly. You’d have to find a way to thank him for putting the two of you together.

Ben was so relieved that you took him to a park towards the outskirts of the big city. He preferred to think and talk while moving, It helped him focus.

“So I’m sure I owe you some explanations.” He began. He made sure to loop your arm with his not wanting you to get too far away or for his voice to get so loud that passers-by would hear your conversation.

“Yeah, just two really.” He was shocked that you agreed with him. Most of the soulmates he’d seen were so instantly in love, he wasn’t ready for any push back.

“Which one would you like first, love?” If there were two you wanted now, he wanted to be sure they were the ones you wanted and not the ones he thought were most important.

“Why did my Mark change?” That . . . may have stopped him in his tracks a little.

“Your Mark . . .changed?” He was a little confused. He’d never heard of Marks changing.

“Yeah. One day it said ‘Ben Jones’ and the next it said ‘Ben Hardy’. I always worried that something bad happened.” You looked up at him and back down quickly before admitting the next bit. “I may have googled you after X-Men came out and found out that it’s just your stage name.”

Ben wracked his brain for an answer to that one. “I don’t know about that one, but we can figure it out together.” He smiled at you.

“The next one is why haven’t you admitted to having a Mark?” There it was. His biggest fear to have to explain to you. Of course, you would want to know. It probably would have gotten you together faster if he’d just made it public information.

Ben stopped and pulled you closer to him with a hand on either side of your face.

“That was the hardest decision I’d ever had to make.” He looked so sad as he met your eyes. “I wanted to protect you, and myself. I wanted this life and career. I made this choice. You didn’t.”

“Are you joking?” You blinked, a little dumbfounded. “I am never going to hear the end of this from Ty.” You shook your head and grabbed his wrists to pull his hands away from your face.

“Let’s see it then.” You fully met his eyes, a new determination in your own.

“Well, alright.” Ben gave you a cocky smile and turned around to pull his sleeve so that you could see your own name in a startling blood red on his skin. “What do you think?”

Before you could respond, you reached out and ran your hand from his elbow to his shoulder following the path your name made. “It’s incredible.”

Ben had just watched your face and taken in the quiet astonishment that played across it. He could never have guessed that you really thought this day would never come.

Quickly, he fixed his shirt sleeve and turned back to face you. “Can I see yours?” He asked quietly.

You extended your wrist out towards Ben and he took it carefully, almost as if you would break. He brought himself around to stand next to her so that he could read his own name appropriately.

“I can’t believe it’s really there.” He took in the wine red stain on your wrist that was his name and rubbed the pad of his thumb delicately along it. “Ben Hardy. Who would’ve thought that it would change to my stage name?” He asked mostly to himself.

“I certainly didn’t, but I’m so glad it did.” You placed your hand on top of where his thumb was tracing your Mark and gave him a genuine smile. The one you got in return was absolutely blinding.

“I guess Fate decided that we were meant to be.”

A/N: I hope you enjoyed it! See y’all sometime next week. I’m going to go be murdered by these two tests. Have a good day, lovelies!

Taglist: @rogers-wristbands @deakydeckme

#ben hardy X reader #ben hardy fluff #soulmate au #ben hardy imagine #borhap imagine #t writes #this was longer than i expected #sorry y'all #also im a ho for smily ben #he deserves to be happy #joe is fine #he's a big boy with a car #he did not get stranded

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writeyourownlifestory · 6 years ago

Text

Dealor/Hardzello Request!

Requested by @lettinggosthehardestpart

Ok how bout this, dealor and hardzzello double date except neither knows the other is a couple so they all try to hide how in love they are with their respective partners

All right, I did my best here. BASICALLY! Live Aid took place in the year 2000. More or less everything stayed the same. Dealor is mid-forties here; Hardzello is basically their same. Rather than a movie all about Queen (or really just about Freddie), Netflix is doing a special on Live Aid and each band has to be cast. This is Hardzello meeting Dealor to discuss their roles.

If this is trash, I apologize. I don’t normally do request because they’re far more challenging for me but I did my best. Enjoy?

“What if they don’t like us?”

Ben couldn’t help but roll his eyes at the man beside him. Joe had been the anxious one in the bunch. More than Gwilym. Hell, even more than Rami, who was literally playing the lead singer of the band and the person who would have the most amount of screen time.

Ben wasn’t exactly worried. From what he has been told, Roger Taylor was a precious person and eager to have his younger self portrayed on the screen; even if it was just the Netflix screen.

“Why wouldn’t they? We’re handsome. We’re talented.”

“We don’t look a thing like them,” Joe argued as they turned down the street.

“We can’t all be clones like Gwilym and Brian. Look, all we have to do is play. I’ll be hidden behind the drum kit for most of the show and so long as you do that typical John Deacon styled side-step, you’ll be fine.”

“What if he hates my accent. He didn’t do a lot of interviews, Ben. It’s hard to get his accent right.”

“And that’s why we’re meeting up with them now, so we can speak to them and learn their mannerisms.” Reaching forward, Ben placed his hand at the back of Joe’s neck, his thumb rubbing up and down smoothly. “Relax love. You have nothing to worry about.”

Joe sighed, turning into the parking lot of the diner they had agreed to meet the two members at. They parked and sat for a few moments, just enjoying the privacy. “It’s gonna suck not being able to hold your hand,” Joe admitted with a sad smile.

They had met at the audition and chemistry test; the latter being something they obviously thrived on. They went for coffee and out to celebrate when they got the call that they had both been given the job. They had been together ever since though only a handful of people knew.

Ben didn’t like the idea of not being able to touch Joe the way he was now. So simple, so innocent and yet it meant a whole of difference to those who would actually care. Ben wasn’t going to think that Roger Taylor of Queen was a homophobe, how could he be when Freddie Mercury was the face of their band and lived so freely up to the day he died.

Still. They thought it would be good to keep their relationship a secret, at least for now. Once the film was shot, there would be nothing holding them back.

“This is utterly ridiculous,”

Roger rolled his eyes, a blond brow tipping up past his sunglasses to look to the man beside him. When Roger found out they would be featuring them in this new film all about Live Aid, he couldn’t help but be excited. It was a whole giant thing, with all unknown actors portraying these big-time rock stars. Roger was honored to be a part of it, especially since most of the proceeds would be going to Freddie’s foundation.

“Are you going to bitch the entire time or just until they show up?” Roger asked from behind his coffee mug. “They can’t exactly have a film about Live Aid without Queen. Not to toot our own horn, but we a big deal back then.”

“We’re a big deal now. Unfortunately.” John grumbled, him arms fighting over his chest.

Roger had been used to this attitude. With John absolutely despising the fame that came their way. All the while Roger loved it. Every single second of it. And that was fine. They evened each other out in that sense.

The band had more or less been retired for the past five years. After Freddie’s passing, they didn’t really have much of a reason to go on. John was perfectly fine with that and after a bit of a breakdown and the realization that life would still go on, Roger was fine with that too.

“No one is asking you to make a cameo, John. Just meet the guy playing you and give him tips. You should be honored that they even want anything to do with us. We’ve done all the miming, it’s not that hard.”

“I just don’t get why they’d want to make a movie about it anyway. Can’t they just do a documentary and use old footage?”

“If they did, then they’d want each band to sit down and talk about it. Half the people who performed there are either dead or retired.”

“Not you. Not Brian.”

“Nobody wants to watch a Queen documentary with only two members, John.” Roger rolled his eyes once more, focusing more on his coffee mug. “Look, they seem like good lads. All we have to do is tell them how to portray us and then our job is done.”

“Right. So should I inform this Mazzello boy that the weekly blowjobs didn’t begin until after Live Aid?”

Roger spit out the coffee he had been sipping, falling into small coughing. His blue eyes watered behind his glasses and he blinked again and again to dry them. “You are such a bitch.” He muttered quietly.

The two had been together for half their career, though nobody in the world other than a chosen few people were aware of that. Due to their retirement, they didn’t go into the public eye as much. Roger was more likely to do an interview, but even then he never answered any questions on his love life. He just spoke about music.

“Roger Taylor?” The blond looked up, finding another blond standing beside him. Besides that one there was a brunet or perhaps ginger, he couldn’t really tell, smiling shyly.

“Yeah, that’s me.”

“Ben Hardy. We spoke on the phone.”

Right. Hardy. That was the name of the one playing him. Roger had seen a picture of the young man and he had to admit, he was impressed. The man was hard more handsome than himself, though he lacked the boyish beauty that Roger had been known for.

“Right. Yes. Please, sit.”

The younger men came forward, going to sit in the seats across from them. The brunet smiled brightly, looking across the table to John. “Mr. Deacon? Joseph Mazzello — everybody calls me Joe. It’s nice to finally meet you.”

To his credit, John was polite as always. He shook the man’s hand and asked any question that was answered. Joe tried to make a joke here and there, pointing out little things like the hairstyle and the way John had danced during the performance.

“Just follow the beat of the music. I’m a free dancer. Just do what feels natural.”

“One perk about being behind the drum kit is not having to dance in front of millions of people.” Roger teased, pushing his sunglasses into his hair.

“We’ve watched the performance dozens of times. You’re unbelievable.” Joe insisted. “That hairstyle? The clothing? Everything about it is so iconic.”

“Get ready for the worst hairpiece you’ll ever have to wear.” Roger joked, laughing as John elbowed him in the hip.

“Is there anything you can tell us about that time that might be vital?” Ben asked carefully. “We haven’t been given the full script yet. Unsure if we have any lines or if we’re just doing the performance, but we’d like to know anything you could tell us.”

“Brian fucked up Princess Diana’s name upon meeting her. Not sure if they’re going to shoot that, but I’ll always cherish his embarrassment.” Roger confessed, sending a playful glance over to John.

“Were you dating anyone at the time? Any girlfriends behind the scenes?” Joe asked, looking up from his phone where had been typing out all the tips that were being given.

Roger and John exchanged a look, with John looking innocently stoic while Roger was just left smirking. “No, no. Mostly just hung out with one another.”

“You guys seem super close. I mean, who wouldn’t want to be in a band with your best friend?”

“You two seem to get along rather well.”

Joe cocked his head slightly, offering a playful smile to the blond beside him. Both males laughed, trying to brush it off as just being nervous around to rockstars rather than them being blissfully in love and trying (and failing) to hide it.

“Ah well, we passed the chemistry test with flying colors,” Joe admitted.

John hummed, watching the two ever so carefully. Joe had known that John Deacon was the quiet one in the band. So far opposite from Freddie Mercury himself, but he fit so well in that band of misfits. It was an honor to be playing him, even if the role itself was just a passing one.

“Thank you both for meeting us. We really didn’t know what to expect.”

“Who knows. If this takes off, they may call us back for a spin-off.” Ben suggested.

Roger threw his head back, laughing outright. “Could you imagine that, Deacy? A movie all about Queen?”

“Can’t imagine someone willingly going to see it be honest,” John mumbled, his fingers brushing with Roger’s under the table.

“I’d see it!” Joe proclaimed proudly. “I’d see it seven times. You guys are awesome.”

“Flattery will get you everywhere, lad,” Roger answered, patting himself down for his cigarettes. “Perhaps we’ll see you around? We haven’t been invited onto set but I’ve always been known to crash a party.”

“That would be lovely, actually. Thank you again. Truly.”

The four men shook hands and said their words of thanks. Roger and John watched them as they went off, with John’s lips finally breaking into a smile. “Something tells me they’re going to play us rather well.” He concluded.

“Holy fuck, that was amazing!” Joe said as he jogged back to the car. “I mean, John is super quiet but that’s fine. And Roger! That guy is a legend. This is going to be fantastic.”

“What do you say? Takeaway and some good old fashioned tom-foolery to celebrate?” Ben suggested, stealing the keys from Joe’s pocket so he could drive.

“I knew I loved you for a reason.”

Roger pulled his pack of cigarettes from his pocket, frowning when he found it empty. “Should we have told them about the quicky we had after the set?”

John snickered, shaking his head. “We’ll let them figure that out on their own.”

#fanfic #queen fanfic #dealor fanfic #hardzello #hardzello fanfic #dealor #fic request #hardzzello #mazzardy

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bisluthq · 6 days ago

Note

Gen ask but was swifties kinda “stalking” on Joe’s exs when they were still together? Like trying to find out who has he dated before? Ik his fans have, but I rarely see the TS fandom talked about his exs (which is good imo) but compared to Travis, which they still talked about Kayla sometimes (especially if she’s the one initiating the TK talk ykwim). But I think it may have to do that Joe’s exs are legit normies who never talked about being his ex either so that’s why they never really cared about them to begin with?

I mean I did a lot of deep diving into Joe’s romantic history so without like trumping my own horn, I think I personally sorta uncovered a lot of that. His exes for the most part aren’t famous at all or in the case of Lindsey Russell are famous but not in a tabloidy goes on podcasts way. Joe didn’t really have any serious girlfriends between his first-ish (I mean idk maybe he saw someone else before in a very childish goes to the movies sorta way but that girl and he were dating for a fair while and did long distance for the first year of uni and do still have mutual friends so I legit think it just… wasn’t a good life stage fit), and then he had the thing with Lindsey and he had that other brunette girl he was seeing for a spell and he was involved with Serena for a while. But like 1) you have to kinda dig for this stuff 2) several are normies and I personally never feel comfy blasting normies’ names out online right like I wouldn’t ever post the rumored Mrs Robinson’s government name when all they did was shag a pretty blond boy who likes books and art and stuff 3) none of it was, from what we’ve been able to ascertain (although feelings are obviously complicated so who knows) ever especially deep?

I think the difference with Kayla is 1) racism tbh because racist discourse permeates a lot of the stuff I see about her/them 2) it was a very serious relationship and not like a girl Travvy was sending “what’re you up to” messages at 3 am or anything so I think it’s seen as a bigger threat by Swifties because Swifties don’t seem to really get the fact that - unless there are kids involved or something - people are far likelier to try again with someone they have unfinished business with and not with someone you cared about but it just repeatedly wasn’t working 3) Kayla’s a media personality/influencer and part of her brand is a measure of honesty and authenticity so like yes she has to mention and respond to her ex of 6+ years shacking up with Taylor Swift!?? Whereas like Lindsey Russell had no motivation to bring that into a Blue Peter segment lmfao. So that’s what I think is going on there.

also a lot of Swifties (and Gaylors) loved to quote that Daily Mail piece where his friend said he didn’t have a girlfriend (despite girls being interested) and I believe he did not have an especially serious monogamous relationship between that first London Girl ex and Taylor. Doesn’t mean he was celibate and actually far more cause for jealousy lol and discomfort idk? Again to make it all about me, I have absolutely 0 concerns about my partner reconnecting with the ex wife because it clearly didn’t work and ended badly but if a past fling was like actively pursuing friendship idk that I’d love that and we agreed so now except where the friendship is deeply rooted and the little dalliance was an ickle mistake, we try not to indulge former FWB when they try reach out.

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wellhalesbells · 6 years ago

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I see you reblogging some comic stuff an I was wondering if you have a favorite comic or favorite character or ship?

this ask is from so long ago but [DEEP BREATH IN] i’m finally going to answer it, nonny. finally. i kept wanting to read a little bit farther in my comics stack because.... maybe i’ll like that and will regret not having recced it, i just hafta--get--to it, see? and, honestly, i’m still there BUT, come on, i’ll never be caught up because that would mean comics would just have to stop coming out and i would be sad forever if that happened, SO

i’m not even going to pretend like i can narrow this down to one comic. (one ship? sure, that’s spideypool. one character? sure, that’s the merc with a mouth, the regenerating degenerate, wade motherfucking wilson. but one comic?!) there is just straight-up too much out there to make a definitive ‘yes, this is it, this is THE ONE ™ ’ statement. instead, uh, let’s break this shit down, yeah? (super special secret bonus round, will note all lgbt+ rep and standalone comics.) in no particular order, here the frig it goes!

HORROR

infidel, by pornsak pichetshote and aaron campbell. in case you haven’t seen this on every 2018 best list ever, here it is. and, yeah, it was good. a muslim-american main character living in a haunted apartment building where the entities feed off the xenophobia of its occupants. if that’s not a fucking modern horror story i don’t know what is.

spread, by justin jordan and kyle strahm. THIS IS ONE OF MY NEW AND ALREADY ALL-TIME FAVORITES. what an awesomely weird and epic story. the spread is an uncontrollable, unstoppable monster-making force that humanity accidentally unleashed by digging too deep. it infects everything it touches and basically all of humanity is running from quarantine to quarantine just hoping for the best. and speaking of hope.... she’s a baby, rescued by no, and the only thing that’s ever been able to stop the spread. also, no’s gay? and i just DID NOT see that coming. it seems like it’s going to be such a formulaic, bro-y story about the action hero who kisses the face off his girl (her name’s molly and she’s batshit insane and amazing) and instead, nope, it is not that at all. lgbt+ main characters.

the black monday murders, by jonathan hickman and tomm coker. hate capitalism? think all the rich and powerful are evil, soul-sucking monsters? [obnoxious, low-budget commercial sound effects] MAN, HAVE I GOT THE SERIES FOR YOU.

the beauty, by jeremy haun and jason a. hurley. i just started this recently but so far, oh my good golly gosh, i looove it. a sexually transmitted disease that makes you conventionally gorgeous.... at least before it explodies you. [wide, creepy smile] the art is gorgeous, the characters are aces and i am very, very pleased so far. lgbt+ minor characters.

the great divide, by ben fisher and adam markiewicz. this? was a COOL idea. the execution stumbled a bit but, gosh, was it neat. it’s post-apocalyptic where touching another person will literally kill.... one of you. the survivor then absorbs the memories of the person who dies, taking on a ‘rider.’ some people collect them, some people go mad, some form a bond, all have the side effect of dyslexia. like i said, neat as all get out. lgbt+ minor-ish/main-ish character. standalone.

revival, by tim seely and mike norton. a rural town in wisconsin experiences ‘miracle day,’ where the dead rise again.... except, they were kinda already mourned and buried and this is really just fucking up the status quo.

the woods, by james tynion iv and michael dialynas. a high school gets picked up and plopped down in an entirely new, and wickedly hostile universe. it’s all survival and alliances and seeing what you’re really made of when it comes down to it. lgbt+ main characters.

clean room, by gail simone and jon davis-hunt. a cult, a journalist and a clean room walk into a bar...

anya’s ghost, by vera brosgol. you think it’ll be a cute story of a girl and her ghost. HA HA THAT IS NOT WHAT HAPPENS AT ALL, OKAY.

FANTASY

rumble, by john arcudi and james harren. SCARECROW WARRIOR GOD, SCARECROW WARRIOR GOD, SCARECROW WARRIOR GOD!!! okay, first off, the art in this? pushes every friggin’ button i’ve got, and many i did not know i had. second, this book is so fucking fun. it’s mythology that’s balls to the wall ridiculous, funny, and features a main character whose life motto is basically: ‘do i have to?’ infinitely relatable and then some.

heathen, by natasha alterici and rachel deering. UGH, ONE OF MY FAVORITES. the art is just horribly, horrendously gorgeous and it’s LESBIAN VIKING MYTHOLOGY, OKAY. OKAYYYY??? lgbt+ main characters.

the wicked + the divine, by kieron gillen and jamie mckelvie. one of my favorite ever series right here. it’s a hella cool concept (gods reincarnating as humans every twelve years, and burning up their hosts in two), whip-smart and if you’ve ever met a human being who likes a pun more than kieron gillen i defy you to produce them. lgbt+ main and minor characters.

batgirl, by gail simone and adrian sayaf and vicente cifuentes. you know how people rave about gail simone? there’s a reason people rave about gail simone. honestly, i’ve never had much interest in babs. i don’t tend to go for superheroes who don’t kill and i have even less interest in ‘the killing joke’ story line and i am convinced only gail simone could’ve done the recovery on that and she did a GLORIOUS job of it.

red hood and the outlaws, by scott lobdell and dexter soy. (ignoring recent - and annoying - developments), this is my favorite of all the rebirths dc did. scott lobdell is the only writer to have gotten the idea down of: okay, we’re starting over, i assume you don’t know anything but i also assume there are a bajillion people reading who know everything, and hit the perfect medium between those two things. so if you want to start a jason todd run, you legitimately can here, and get all the found family, badassery, batman-teasing enjoyment there is to be had.

iceman, by sina grace and robert gill (covers by kevin wada). classic super-heroing here and bobby’s first solo title. he’s figuring out coming out while fighting (and flirting) with baddies. sina really gets his humor and how truly wonder-awful it is! lgbt+ main character.

spider-man/deadpool, by joe kelly and ed mcguinness. watch those names there, those are your guys right there, period. they looked at the void of a spider-man/deadpool series and filled it with absolutely everything you could possibly want for the pair (sans a hardcore make-out sesh, though they did get a few variant covers with some puckered up lips in there!)

limbo, by dan watters and caspar wijngaard. a fusion of 80s aesthetics, voodoo elements and a noir tone. just some remarkably cool shit in this. the ending, for me, left something to be desired but it was more than worth it to see worship via mixtapes. standalone.

hawkeye: kate bishop, by kelly thompson and leonardo romero. kate bishop is, apparently???, a super impossible character for a lot of writers. kelly thompson is not one of them. kelly thompson is my favorite kate bishop writer, actually, and the fact that she is ever not writing her is a gd travesty.

the unbeatable squirrel girl, by ryan north and erica henderson. honestly, i’m so tempted to just stick this under ‘contemporary,’ because it really does just feel very... normal. doreen’s navigating college, new friendships, and y’know... the squirrely-ness. this had every opportunity to suck and instead it’s funny as heck, never takes itself too seriously, and is just pure good-hearted entertainment through and through.

wolf, by ales kot and matt taylor. a paranormal detective and the-possible-antichrist go on a road trip. people hated this comic and i don’t know how you can hate a comic that has a character called freddy chtonic who has tentacles for a mouth???

ms. marvel, by g. willow wilson and adrian alphona. hi, you read ms. marvel because the world is a garbage fire and people are terrible and your cynicism is at an all time high and then kamala khan waltzes in and reminds you people generally want to help each other and the world improves when we work together and that thing optimists feel? you’ll feel that for as long as you’ve got the pages open and that’s a magical thing. lgbt+ minor character.

monstress, by marjorie m. liu and sana takeda. psychic links with monsters, matriarchal societies, magic and witchery, half-human/half-animal (and other ratios) characters, all through a steampunk lens. what’s not to like about that??

inhuman, by charles soule. i love this series, i love the idea of being a total average joe/joanne, getting smacked in the face by a cloud of mist and suddenly having to figure out how to live basically a whole new life. also, if you don’t fall madly in love with dante pertuz, i don’t even know what to tell you, my dude.

heart in a box, by kelly thompson and meredith mcclaren. break-ups suck, but only because of that whole pesky broken heart thing, right? so emma gives hers away. problem solved, no? standalone.

i kill giants, by joe kelly and j.m. ken niimura. i didn’t cry my eyes out or anything. did not. standalone.

sex criminals, by matt fraction and chip zdarsky. having sex = stopping time, which leads suzie and jon to the only logical conclusion: let’s rob some banks!

hawkeye, by matt fraction and david aja. honestly there are a lot of other artist combos in this run but the only ones that are worthwhile are the ones that have fraction and aja’s names on them - sorry not sorry.

SCIENCE FICTION

black bolt, by saladin ahmed and christian ward. saladin revived this character one hundred million percent. there is absolutely a reason this was parading around all over ‘best’ lists when it was released. it really, really did the damn thing.

saga, by brian k. vaughan and fiona staples. this is the comic you recommend to people who don’t even like comics because it is that good. like, my dad - who hadn’t read a comic since he was a pre-teen, eagerly awaits each new trade. the world-building, the characters, the care put into every single solitary bit of all the things? unparalleled. lgbt+ minor characters.

frostbite, by joshua williamson and jason shawn alexander. a post-apocalyptic story that has humanity dying from a plague that literally freezes you from the inside out. very neat, very cold, very readable. standalone.

descender, by jeff lemire and dustin nguyen. this had a rough start, for me, with the main character of the first trade being tim-21, an android who is literally incapable of having the depth to be a lead BUT that does not last through to the next trade, thank god. lots of space and found family and world-building in this to be had! but you know how people rave about jeff lemire? there’s a reason people rave about jeff lemire.

paper girls, by brian k. vaughan and cliff chiang. the 80s and time travel and lifelong friendships. it’s brian k. vaughan, you know it’s good, okay? why do i even have to sell you here, man? lgbt+ main characters.

injection, by warren ellis and declan shalvey. this is another one on my list that started out a little rough but really appealed to me later on. there was just a lot to absorb in that first trade but, once you’ve got it, the ride gets way, way smoother. lgbt+ main and minor characters.

black science, by rick remender and matteo scalera. this was a rocky start, because the main character is such an asshole but in a way where he can’t see he’s an asshole, he’s just a tortured genius who’s superior to all of you, don’t you know? but i am so glad i persevered because if that’s the set up? the rest of the series is knocking him back down. super scientist grant mckay finds a way to access the eververse, every possible reality the universe has on offer, and that’s really what causes every single problem that follows. hard to cause the apocalypse and be an arrogant prick, ya know?

CONTEMPORARY

giant days, by john allison and lissa treiman. this series is so funny and smart and warm. these girls are so kind to each other and relatable and failing at adulting regularly and often and i love reading about them. lgbt+ main character.

lumberjanes, by noelle stevenson and grace ellis and brooke a. allen. this is funny and ridiculous and kind and cool and all other awesome adjectives and you should read it, fact. lgbt+ main characters.

my brother’s husband, by gengoroh tagame and anne ishii (translator). this is such a sweet story about acceptance and family tbh. lgbt+ main character.

fence, by c. s. pacat and johanna the mad. i mean... i need to see nicholas and seiji hook-up, i need that, stat. stat means now! lgbt+ main characters.

WEB/INDEPENDENT COMICS

long exposure, by kam heyward. so mitch and jonas are my absolute faves and i love them to death and the author is so kind in that they actually put this up in print on indyplanet so i can read it the way i, personally, love to read comics (and - bonus! - support them with the monies). lgbt+ main characters.

modern dread, by pat shand and ryan fassett (editors). i’ve been trying to find more better horror comics lately so i’ve been kind of half-heartedly stumbling through kickstarter on the hunt and this was SUCH a great find. it’s an anthology but more cleverly done than any other kickstarter anthology i’ve read, with a main story line that seamlessly strings together the would-be-disjointed ones. this was really thoughtfully put together and really well done! standalone.

heartstopper, by alice oseman. a very sweet story about two high school-aged boys becoming fast friends, playing rugby and falling in love. the two characters are mentioned as an aside in the author’s book, solitaire, and she became so invested in them that she wrote their backstory as a free webcomic. lgbt+ main characters.

the pale, by jay fabares. JUST started this (like, just a day or so ago) but i’m enjoying it so far!

hotblood!, by toril orlesky. i mean... is it a webcomic about a centaur falling in love with his boss? it just might be. did i get a bound edition through a kickstarter campaign? maybe. maybe i did that. who’s to say? lgbt+ main characters.

the bay, by bbz. life on mars through the lens of three young professionals who form an odd but lasting friendship. lgbt+ main characters.

hard drive, by artroan. is it a nsfw comic about a dude and a robot? .... it might be a nsfw comic about a dude and a robot. [coughs] lgbt+ main characters.

seen nothing yet, by tess stone. a nsfw comic about two amateur ghost hunters. can’t imagine why i might be interested in that [coughs] lgbt+ main characters.

captain imani and the cosmic chase, by lin darrow and alex assan. i mean did i want a starship captain who can’t help but lust after the smuggler he’s chasing. i mean, maybe i did. maybe. lgbt+ main characters.

taproot, by keezy young. ghost falls in love with boy, boy falls in love with ghost, AND THEY LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER. lgbt+ main characters.

always raining here, by bell and hazel. just two boys falling in lurve. lgbt+ main characters.

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tayjoefanfic · 6 years ago

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The Sick Alwyn Boys

Authors Note: Sorry it’s been so long since I last posted a fic. I’ve been crazy busy with school, but I plan to get back into writing more because I miss it. This is a fic about Taylor taking care of Joe and Patrick when they are sick. I hope you guys like it! Let me know what you think!

Taylor had a weeklong break from tour and was so happy to be able to spend some time in London with Joe. Even though they both had been frequently working, and she had reemerged into the public eye long ago, she still found a lot of comfort in hiding out in London with her boyfriend and getting to just be Taylor and Joe, despite their very busy and public careers.

Taylor woke up cuddled up next to Joe and looked over at the clock realizing that it was already 10:30 am, knowing that they both had needed to sleep in a little bit. She watched Joe peacefully sleep for a couple of minutes before giving into the urge to wake him up so that she could spend some much needed quality time with him. She cuddled up into him even more and kissed his lips while playing with his hair, hoping to gently wake him up. He began to stir before mumbling a groggy “mornin’ baby” and opening his eyes to his gorgeous girlfriend.

“Sorry to wake you up, but I’m got bored, and I miss you,” Taylor commented while running her fingers in a relaxing pattern over his chest.

“It’s okay I’ve missed you too babe,” Joe replied before breaking out into a fit of coughs.

“Uh oh that doesn’t sound good,” Taylor noted before bringing her hand up to his forehead and asking, “are you feeling okay? I think you have a fever,” her voice laced with concern.

Joe tried to tell her he was fine before he started coughing again and noticed his sore throat, stuffed nose, and pounding headache.

“I guess I might be getting sick” he relented.

“Yeah it seems like it. Don’t worry baby, I will take great care of you” Taylor promised.

Joe knew better than to try and object to Taylor’s efforts at nursing him back to health. He knew there was no stopping his wonderful girlfriend from going above and beyond to take care of him and the people she cared about. Plus, if he was being honest, he liked to be babied when he was sick and wasn’t going to fight the extra love and attention from her.

Taylor kissed his forehead one last time before heading to the bathroom to wash her face and brush her teeth and somewhat get ready for the day. When she walked back into the master bedroom, she handed Joe some ibuprofen to help with his headache and fever and gave him a glass of water, which she insisted that he drink. After he had taken the medicine she informed him that she was going to go downstairs and make him some soup because he still needed to eat even if he was sick. Meanwhile, Joe decided to go back to sleep for a little while until she returned with lunch.

About 45 minutes later, Taylor came back upstairs and woke Joe up with a bowl of homemade soup and more water so that he could stay hydrated. The two sat in bed while he ate and watched some TV, just relaxing together. After he finished eating, Joe laid his head on Taylor’s chest and allowed her to absent-mindedly run her fingers through his hair, something she knew he loved.

“I don’t want you to get sick babe, you know you don’t have to stay up here if you don’t want to” Joe offered, knowing she probably wouldn’t except and deep down hoping she wouldn’t.

“Shut up, you know I’m not going anywhere. You’re sick and I’m going to stay right here and take care of you because I love you,” Taylor responded.

“I love you too baby, and thank you for taking care of me,” Joe replied with a sleepy smile on his face. He knew how lucky he was to have her.

Meanwhile at school, Patrick was beginning to feel pretty sick as well, not unlike his older brother. During his study hall period he called his mom, asking her if she would come pick him up since he wasn’t feeling very well.

Elizabeth had to remind him that both her and his father would be out of town for the day on a work thing and wouldn’t be back until really late that night.

“Why don’t you call Joe and ask him to come pick you up honey” Elizabeth suggested.

“Okay fine I guess I’ll call him instead,” Patrick relented knowing that Joe wouldn’t take care of him like his mom or make him food. He would probably just leave him on the couch to sleep it off.

“I’m sorry honey, we will be home later tonight and hopefully you will start feeling better soon. I love you,” Elizabeth conveyed before ending the call.

The couple remained in bed cuddling and made it half way through another episode of Law and Order SVU before Joe’s Phone rang. Taylor grabbed the phone from the bedside table to answer it for him so he didn’t have to move. She saw Patrick’s name on the screen and quickly picked up, hoping everything was okay with him.

“Hey Pat, what’s up? Aren’t you supposed to be at school right now?” Taylor asked.

“Umm yeah I am at school, but I’m feeling really sick and mum and dad are out of town all day so they told me to call Joe and ask if he would come and get me” he replied.

“Awe I’m sorry you’re not feeling well. It just so happens that Joe is also feeling pretty sick, so I don’t know if he is up to coming to get you, but I will send my security to pick you up, and you can come hangout over here. What’s one more Alwyn boy to take care of,” Taylor offered.

“Thanks Tay, see you soon then,” Patrick replied before ending the call to wait to be picked up. He was honestly pretty happy that Taylor was there too. She was a lot nicer and more caring than Joe so she would actually take care of him way more than his older brother.

After the phone call ended with Patrick, Taylor quickly sent a text to Elizabeth explaining that Joe was also sick, but assuring her that she was sending someone to pick Patrick up from school and that she would make sure he was okay.

The couple decided to relocate to the couch in the downstairs living room so they would be there when Patrick got back from school. About 40 minutes later, Taylor heard the front door opening and looked up from the TV to see Patrick walking through the door. Even though she was used to it by now, she couldn’t help but notice how similar Patrick and Joe looked, they both even had the same sad looking expression when sick.

“Hey Pat! I’m sorry you’re sick buddy. Have you eaten Lunch?” Taylor asked, while giving him a hug.

“No, but I’m not really very hungry” Patrick commented as he plopped down on the couch next to Taylor.

“You have to eat something even tough you don’t feel well. Do you want me to get you some soup? I already made Joe eat some a little while ago. I can heat some up for you,” Taylor offered.

“Don’t fight her on this. She is determined to take care of us,” Joe noted lazily as he lifted his head up from Taylor’s lap to glance over at his brother.

“Sure, I guess soup sounds good,” Patrick relented.

Joe sat up so Taylor could get up to go get his little brother some soup before leaning back onto the couch. The brothers sat in silence lazily watching the TV, neither feeling up to talking much. After about 10 minutes Taylor returned to the living room with soup, as well as extra pillows and blankets for the sick boys. She handed Patrick a tray with his soup along with a glass of water. She reached down to feel his forehead before determining that he also had a fever and handing him some ibuprofen like she had given Joe earlier. Patrick sat up and took the medicine before thanking Taylor for the soup.

“Do you guys need anything else?” she asked while putting a blanket over Patrick and handing him one of the pillows she brought.

“I’m good. Thanks, Tay,” Patrick commented before taking his first bite of soup.

“I just want my pillow back, so if you could come sit back down that would be much appreciated” Joe replied, signaling for her to return to her spot between the boys on the couch.

Taylor laughed a little before setting back down onto the couch and allowing Joe to lay his head back in her lap so she could continue running her fingers through his hair in a relaxing manner. She was glad they ended up getting the large sectional couch because it was the perfect size for all of them to comfortably lie out on. Her and Joe had actually just slept on the couch a few times after falling asleep downstairs because it was so comfortable. Now that everyone was situated, they all focused back on the TV.

“Do you guys want to watch a movie? We’ve been watching random episodes of this show for hours and I’m kind of feeling a change,” Taylor asked the boys.

Both of them lazily mumbled a “sure, sounds good,” prompting Taylor to find a movie for them to watch. She scrolled Nextflix for a while before Patrick suggested that they watch Harry Potter because it was the standard sick day movie of both the brother’s childhoods.

“Oh yes, I like that idea!” Taylor responded excitedly.

“I wish I could share in your enthusiasm baby, but unfortunately I have no energy. He is right though, Harry Potter is a must watch sick day movie” Joe commented.

“So which one do you want to watch? Do you wanna just start with the first one?” Taylor asked.

The boys nodded in approval and Taylor hit play as they lounged on the couch. Patrick had fallen asleep about three fourths of the way through the first movie and Joe was drifting in and out of sleep, never moving his head from Taylor’s lap.

Just as the second movie ended and Taylor hit play on the third one, she glanced down at her phone to check the time and realized it was already 10:30 pm. She also noticed a text from Elizabeth informing her that they had just gotten back in town and would be by to pick up Patrick in about 20 minutes. Realizing that she had sent the text 17 minutes ago, Taylor figured she would be there any minute. She decided to just let Patrick sleep until his mom got there because she didn’t want to wake him up before she had to. He looked so peaceful sleeping on the other side of her, not unlike her boyfriend who was also sleeping contently.

After a couple minutes went by, she heard the front door open to see her security unlocking the door and allowing Elizabeth and Richard to walk in. They immediately spotted Taylor and the boys and began walking over. Taylor paused the TV before saying hi to Joe’s parents. Elizabeth came over to give Taylor a hug before leaning down to Kiss Joe’s forehead and rub his back, stirring him awake. As Joe woke up, he saw his mom and raised his head up from Taylor’s lap, sitting up so he could give her a hug.

“Thank you for taking care of them today Taylor, I appreciate it so much. I know these two can be pretty needy when they are sick. Although I’ve found that most guys seem to think the world is ending whenever they get sick,” Elizabeth Joked.

“It was no problem, Joe is pretty needy all the time” Taylor joked back, earning a protest from her boyfriend.

“I’m just kidding baby,” she responded before assuring Elizabeth and Richard that it was no problem at all and that she was more than happy to take care of both Joe and Patrick. Patrick began to wake up as a result of all the talking as his mom sat down next to him, feeling his forehead.

“Both of them had fevers earlier, but I made them eat some soup and drink water and gave them some ibuprofen to hopefully help with the fevers” Taylor informed their parents.

“Well it sounds like they were both in great hands. Thank you again honey. I better get Patrick home so he can go back to bed” Elizabeth responded, ushering for Patrick to get up and go to the car with his dad.

“Thanks again, Taylor” Richard noted as he came over to hug Joe and Taylor goodbye.

Once they all said their goodbyes and left with Patrick, Taylor came back over to the couch where Joe was still sitting.

“Do you want to go upstairs and go to bed too? Are you feeling any better baby?”

“Yeah, I’m starting to feel a bit better, but upstairs sounds good,” Joe responded.

The couple made their way up to the master bedroom and quickly got ready for bed before getting under the covers, Joe immediately cuddling up next to Taylor once again.

“I hate that you’re feeling so sick baby. Hopefully you just need a good nights rest and you will feel a little better tomorrow.”

Joe hummed in agreement before whispering, “thanks for taking care of me today baby. I love you so much, you know that, right?”

“I had a feeling, but thanks for confirming,” Taylor joked back before continuing, “and I love you too. Now go to sleep because I want you to be awake enough to hangout with me tomorrow. As cute as you are sleeping all day, I would like to get to talk to you as some point since I’ve miss you and all.”

“I’ll do my best. Good night babe,” Joe responded before drifting off to sleep. Taylor fell asleep soon after him, realizing she was actually really tired, despite the fact that they had just laid around all day.

#Taylor and Joe fanfiction #T + J #fanfiction #taylor swift #joe alwyn #The Sick Alwyn Boys #tayjoefanfic

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phoenixisstrange · 5 years ago

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Any Place Better Than Home

When most people think about being kicked out of their home by their mother, they view it as a tragic conclusion to the story that is their childhood. At the time I certainly fit into that category, but I quickly figured out that it had been one of the best things to happen to me. The last time I spoke to my mother, the day my dad, my brother, and I packed all of my belongings into the U-Haul truck, was December 15, 2017. This day also happened to be my brother’s 26th birthday… Happy Birthday, Joe! This day was the catalyst for my life outside of an abusive, manipulative, and dysfunctional family. At least that’s what I thought.

“I’m outside, open the door for me. Let’s get started.” The message lights up my cracked phone screen promptly at 9 am, exactly when dad said he’d be here. I sit amongst a sea of my belongings on the couch that I had found when I moved into the basement. There’s something about seeing all of a person’s stuff packed into construction garbage bags that makes you realize how small they really are. How minute their life is in the grand scheme of things. The thought of this upsets me even more.

“Joe, he’s here!” I yell from my room. My brother, Joe, lives downstairs in the basement with me. Joe’s room, also known as “The Lair,” is the repurposed play-room. A few weeks earlier, I had claimed what used to be my mother’s “office” as mine. I decided to move to the basement to put some distance between my mother, her prick of a boyfriend, and me. The room was bursting at the door frames with useless shit my mother had accumulated over the years before I got to it. It took my best friend and me three days to clean it out, and we did a damn good job. I lived in the room for about two weeks before everything came to a head and my mother kicked me out.

“Coming!” Joe responds as he deftly maneuvers around the filled laundry hampers and boxes that are strewn about the already-narrow hallway that connects my bedroom to the rest of the house. Taylor, a friend of Joe’s comes along to help us move. I catch myself wallowing in self-pity and reel myself back to reality; dad’s here and we have a mission to complete before my mother gets home. This entire plan is time-sensitive because my mother is not home at the moment, she also doesn’t know that today is the day of my clandestine departure. My mother had told me that I needed to move out but didn’t say when; my dad and I decided the sooner the better and without warning. If everything goes according to plan today, my mother will come home to an empty house with her daughter gone from her life unable to bother her and her prick of a boyfriend again.

I unlock the personal entrance to my bedroom. This door has signified my freedom for the past two weeks-- how it grants me the power to leave as I please and to have my friends over whenever. Today this door is so much more than the freedom to have my friends over whenever. That door is my key to freedom from my longest-standing prison sentence.

The door swings open, the frigid December air mingles with the scent of half-burnt incense. My arm hair stands on end, but I’m not quite sure if it is because of the cold air or if it’s because of my nerves. I watch as my dad plods down the snow-covered hill towards my bedroom. I pray he doesn’t slip on the grass-spiked snow that coats the ground.

“Ok, let’s grab the bed first.” Dad directs us as he steps through the threshold of the house he wishes he never returned to. I can tell that being in this house, the first property he took a mortgage out on with my mother and built from the ground up, puts him straight on edge.

“Happy Birthday, Joe and thanks for helping us,” he adds. I’m glad that Joe is helping us move, but I also feel awful that this is the way he is spending his birthday. We collectively lift up the floppy, bob-o-pedic mattress that sits on the box spring in the middle of my floor. It had been too much for my best friend-- Ryder, who helped me move downstairs-- and me to manage the bed frame. We were barely able to jockey the full-sized mattress down the stairs without catastrophe.

“Okay, so we’re going to layer your TV in between the mattress and the box spring in the truck so it doesn’t fall while I’m driving,” Dad explains. I focus my mind towards my breathing as we hoist the limp mattress up the slippery hill, trying both to keep calm and to stop my muscles from giving out.

We pack the U-Haul with the bed, the TV, the box spring, and other miscellaneous objects. While the guys are moving the bigger furniture I solemnly cart my personal belongings-- like my clothes, record collection, stereo, and video games-- to my two-door red Honda Civic. By the end of it, my car looks like it belongs to that friend named Billie-- who packed up her 2007 Subaru Outback with everything she owned to move to Portland, Oregon after high school. I feel like a vagabond, and I’m too deep in shock to have any thoughts about that.

“We’re gonna have to carry the dressers through the house and out the front,” I hear Joe suggesting to my dad through the open bedroom. This isn’t ideal. The goal was to avoid the upstairs at all costs, but the furniture is both too heavy and too wide to fit through the side door.

“Alyss! I need you to go upstairs and open the front door, Taylor and Joe are going to carry the dressers through the house and I’ll meet you guys at the front.” Dad has no plans on entering the upstairs of this house; I don’t blame him. I run up the gray carpeted stairs one last time. The army of dogs sounds the alarms, barking like a killer is in the house. This is normal. Usher, my chubby, white, chi-weenie (chihuahua/weenie dog) lumbers over to me and I kiss him on his goofy li’l head. I open my bedroom door. The acoustics are wrong. They’re different because the room is now empty, the sounds are hollow. I say goodbye to the bedroom that has been my safe-haven for the past thirteen years. I walk towards the front door down the claustrophobic hallway that had become a place of comfort for me over the years. It was the last step I’d have to take on the mornings when I would drunkenly stumble through the door as the sun rose. This hallway confirmed my safe arrival home many nights.

The kitchen table is stacked with random papers and objects; cigarette butts overflow onto the table from the ashtray. I’m not going to miss this stagnant-ass air. I enter the living room, the room that the front door leads to upon entering the house. I look to my left at the bank of items that Ryder and I had deposited into the living room just two weeks prior. The amount of stuff in this room is impressive, it’s overwhelming. I almost feel guilty for leaving my mother to deal with it, but then I realize that this is something that she needs to deal with. At some point, this shit had to go and she would need to cleanse her life of the clutter. I am simply hastening that process. I’m doing her a favor. Just like she did for me by kicking me out.

I open the door, and once again the crisp winter air smacks me in the face. Only this time it isn’t endearingly mixing with the smell of incense, it’s revealing something rather wicked to the world and my father. He stands at the front door, looks at the ocean of clutter and shakes his head. I can see how happy he is that he escaped this house years ago and that now I am finally making my departure.

“They’re coming,” I tell my dad. Taylor and Joe are bumping up the stairs with the larger of the two dressers. I’m concerned as to how they’re going to make that tight turn in the hallway, but Joe is a part-time mover so he knows how this stuff works. After everything is moved into the U-Haul except for the final dresser, disaster pulls into the driveway.

My mother walks up to the house, “What are you doing in my house?” she asks my dad-- who isn’t in her house. She is looking for a fight.

“We’re almost done, Alyssa’s moving. The way you wanted,” My dad retorts. Mother is clearly taken aback by this, I can tell by the lack of response. She always has something to say about everything. This fills me with joy.

“Don’t knock any of my picture frames off the wall.” She just had to say something. We continue to empty the house having to pass by Mother with each trip in. She is guarding the door like the secret service, watching our every move. Before we finish, I say my final goodbyes to the dogs. I pick my pudgy boy, Usher, up and hug him for what’s probably the last time. Milo, the 14-year old Jack Russell stares at me with big eyes, she (yes, she) knows I’m leaving for good.

“You sure that’s it?” Dad asks me. “We can’t come back.”

“Yeah, there’s nothing here for me.”

“Okay, I’ll follow you guys to grandpa’s house so we can get you moved in quick, and then maybe we can grab something to eat,” Dad tries to comfort me.

“Yeah.”

I walk up the street to my packed noble steed. I didn’t think it was possible to stuff this much crap into such a small car, but I did it. I sit in the driver's seat and start the ignition. My car sputters to life reluctantly; it doesn’t like the cold. I put it in drive and start down the mountain I’ve lived on my whole life. I feel a strange sense of emptiness growing inside of me. I don't look back.

#memoir #Memories #mine #personal #experience #moving #movingon #writing #writers #My writing #phoenixwrites #phoenix #end #kicked out #mother #dysfunctional family #family

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rhiezus · 5 years ago

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Lover As Our Ships.

I Forget That You Existed.

Literally Nayoung to everyone in her life before, including mostly SPB, the Nameless and even Kim Yura.

How many days did I spend thinking 'Bout how you did me wrong, wrong, wrong? Lived in the shade you were throwing 'Til all of my sunshine was gone, gone, gone

Also Keun to SPB... Everyone to SPB, that company is trash. But look:

Sent me a clear message Taught me some hard lessons I just forget what they were It's all just a blur

And don’t even get me started on the chorus.

Cruel Summer

At first, I thought, damn, I don’t have any ship for that because it’s about a breakup and stuff... But then it cleared my mind and now I think it’s two at the same time. First, Minhye and Jukan at college times.

Fever dream high in the quiet of the night You know that I caught it (Oh yeah, you're right, I want it) Bad, bad boy, shiny toy with a price You know that I bought it (Oh yeah, you're right, I want it)

[...]

Hang your head low in the glow of the vending machine I'm not buying (Oh yeah, you're right, I want it) You say that we'll just screw it up in these trying times We're not trying (Oh yeah, you're right, I want it)

But it just doesn’t stop there, it also gave me little hints of Anna and Kuen.

I'm drunk in the back of the car And I cried like a baby coming home from the bar (Oh) Said I'm fine, but it wasn't true I don't wanna keep secrets just to keep you

[...]

And I screamed for whatever it's worth "I love you, " ain't that the worst thing you ever heard?

Lover

We got mixes feelings about this one, it literally could be any ship at some specific moment, so I really don’t know. However, I still keep my word that Hana and Mark were the first one that came to my mind when i listened to this song for the first time, probably because of The Archer and because of the state they are in right now that makes it easy for me to see Hana listening to this one right now and thing “Have I known you 20 seconds or 20 years?” and “All's well that ends well to end up with you”. Anyways, it also reminds me of Nayoung and Keun because of tHE MAGNETIC FORCE OF A MAn, and for the same reason, I can imagine Bonghu and Sanchan. And let’s not forget of Julie and Valak, they also marked this song as theirs. Oh my god, it also reminds me of Minhye and Jukan, for christ's sakes.

The Man

Speaking of her, that’s very Minhye. And nAYoung TOO. Actually, Nayoung seems like the type that would pick a lyrics from this song and posts on her stories, she is that kind of person right now. That’s official I even put on yes girl, there is no going back. But just... look:

Would you like to worry about drinkin' and dollars? And getting bitches and models? And it's so good if you're bad And it's okay if you're mad If I was out flashing my dollars I'd be a bitch, not a baller They'd paint me out to be bad So, it's okay that I'm mad

The Archer

To all the Hopeless Romantics I did before. I’m serious, this song is every single little bitch that's too hopeless romantic. It started with Hana, then I thought of Haneul, probably Kim Yura too, Anna & Clay.

'Cause cruelty wins in the movies I've got a hundred thrown-out speeches I almost said to you

(JUST LOOK AT ANNA AND KIM YURA RIGHT THERE)

And I cut off my nose just to spite my face Then I hate my reflection for years and years

(HANEULLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL)

I wake in the night, I pace like a ghost The room is on fire, invisible smoke And all of my heroes die all alone Help me hold onto you

(CLAY)

I Think He Knows

Speaking of Clay, this song radiates Allen and Clay. But before that, I totally thought about Yehjin and Chang too. So well, probably both.

He got that boyish look that I like in a man I am an architect, I'm drawing up the plans It's like I'm 17, nobody understands No one understands

Seriously? That’s Clay about Allen.

Lyrical smile, indigo eyes, hand on my thigh We could follow the sparks, I'll drive Lyrical smile, indigo eyes, hand on my thigh We could follow the sparks, I'll drive "So where we gonna go?" I whisper in the dark "Where we gonna go?" I think he knows

And this is so Yehjin and Chang, hell yes.

Miss Americana & The Heartbreak Prince

Chines & Chihye. There is none else for this, I swear because I’ve looked up.

You know I adore you, I'm crazier for you Than I was at 16, lost in a film scene Waving homecoming queens, marching band playing I'm lost in the lights

YES, SHALL WE ALL BE SAD ABOUT THIS?

I'm feeling helpless, the damsels are depressed Boys will be boys then, where are the wise men? Darling, I'm scared (Ah)

Keep listening...

No cameras catch my muffled cries I counted days, I counted miles To see you there, to see you there And now the storm is coming, but

And finally...

It's you and me, that's my whole world They whisper in the hallway, "She's a bad, bad girl" (Okay) The whole school is rolling fake dice You play stupid games, you win stupid prizes [...] We're so sad, we paint the town blue Voted most likely to run away with you

Paper Rings

Oh my god, the first time I listened to this song I was “maybe it’s Bonghu and Sanchan”. bUT reading the lyrics I’m so shocked because it’s Raye and Kaili, and fuck this song is very them... From the instrumental to the lyrics, everything.

The moon is high Like your friends were the night that we first met Went home and tried to stalk you on the internet [...] Now I wake up in the night and watch you breathe

Shut up, this is totally about the beer pong! And then suddenly by the end of the year the fact they are together...

I like shiny things, but I'd marry you with paper rings Uh huh, that's right Darling, you're the one I want, and I hate accidents except when we went from friends to this

Shut UPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Honey, without all the exes, fights, and flaws We wouldn't be standing here so tall, so

Cof cof, that’s for Julie. Costance said, “suck it”.

Also, let’s not forget the part she keeps referring to him as “Baby Boy”.

Cornelia Street

Listen to me, I get the feeling this is Jinhyung and Kyungri. There is no further explanation on how I get to this conclusion, I just felt like it.

We were a fresh page on the desk Filling in the blanks as we go As if the street lights pointed in an arrowhead Leading us home

Hm??

And I hope I never lose you, hope it never ends I'd never walk Cornelia Street again That's the kinda heartbreak time could never mend I'd never walk Cornelia Street again And baby, I get mystified by how this city screams your name And baby, I'm so terrified of if you ever walk away

I had to do a whole specification about this, but can you get the feeling that when they finally realized that they didn’t want to cheat or be with anyone else just because what they had was enough? That’s the feeling. Perhaps it’s also about the fact that they were falling so hard that they just suddenly were like ‘that’s true, i don’t want anyone else besides you and this thought kind of terrifies me a little bit’, you know?!

You hold my hand on the street Walk me back to that apartment Years ago, we were just inside Barefoot in the kitchen Sacred new beginnings That became my religion, listen

Totally talking about they sneaking wndr’s dorm to be together.

Death By A Thousand Cuts

I never had this vision about this breakup until reading this song’s lyrics, but this is probably Seulgi when Hailey and she broke up. Yes, very random, yes, you probably didn’t expect this one but it’s true, let me show you.

Saying goodbye is death by a thousand cuts Flashbacks waking me up I get drunk, but it's not enough ’Cause the morning comes and you're not my baby I look through the windows of this love Even though we boarded them up Chandelier's still flickering here ’Cause I can't pretend it's okay when it's not

Very weird seeing Seulgi demonstrate any type of feeling, she probably felt this because they were together for a significant amount of time and Hailey traveled back to her country to sort her things out so... You can imagine how lonely Seulgi must have felt for a while.

I dress to kill my time, I take the long way home I ask the traffic lights if it'll be alright They say, "I don't know" And what once was ours is no one's now I see you everywhere, the only thing we share Is this small town You said it was a great love, one for the ages But if the story’s over, why am I still writing pages?

Seriously? This is totally Seulgi trying to figure out where to move from aside WNDR and Hailey, although she did figure it out somehow I can see why she was confused and a little upset even though she totally agreed with Hailey that the best thing was to break it off.

Tryna find a part of me that you didn't touch My body, my love, my trust (It's death by a thousand cuts) But it wasn't enough, it wasn't enough, no, no

And with that, I rest my case.

London Boy

This would be Nayoung if it was called “Jeju Boy”, also Linlin would take a ride and sing it too if that was the title. Throwback that this is also Taewoon and Hojin (screams and sobs at the same time). If it was “Canadian Boy”, it could be Clay. Wait is Allen from where? IS HE BRITISH? I Thought hE Was AmeriCAn. And finally, if someone does a cover saying “London Girl”, then it’s definitely Evie and Sunny, or even me for wolfie. Yes. I love this song is so catchy, could be anyone talking about their crush, it’s really cute.

Soon You’ll Get Better

You know what this song it's about, let’s skip the crying.

False God

Haneul & Hyuntae. FUCK THIS SONG I SWEAR, IF IT WAS KOREAN I WOULD SAY HANEUL WROTE IT AND GAVE IT TO TAYLOR. SERIOUSLY JUST LOOK AT THE DESCRIPTION BY GENIUS: ”False God” uses heavy religious imagery to compare Swift’s relationship with current boyfriend Joe Alwyn to something all-powerful and greater than themselves.”

We were crazy to think Crazy to think that this could work Remember how I said I'd die for you? We were stupid to jump In the ocean separating us Remember how I’d fly to you?

Oh, boy, shut up Haneul.

They all warned us about times like this They say the road gets hard and you get lost When you're led by blind faith, blind faith

Also laughing about the part she says: “ You're the West Village”, change it to UN Village and it’s good to go.

You Need To Calm Down

That's us. And also Hailey. And also sweetpea.

Afterglow

Oh, here we go. Okay, this song is Linlin and Mingyu. I still can’t get over how much this song is them, seriously, I’ll just show the lyrics and let us be sad for the time being.

I blew things out of proportion, now you're blue Put you in jail for something you didn’t do I pinned your hands behind your back, oh Thought I had reason to attack, but no

[...]

Hey, it's all me, in my head I'm the one who burned us down But it's not what I meant Sorry that I hurt you I don't wanna do, I don’t wanna do this to you (Ooh) I don’t wanna lose, I don't wanna lose this with you (Ooh) I need to say, hey, it’s all me, just don't go Meet me in the afterglow

[...]

I lived like an island, punished you with silence Went off like sirens, just crying Why'd I have to break what I love so much? It’s on your face, don't walk away, I need to say

[...]

Tell me that you're still mine Tell me that we'll be just fine Even when I lose my mind I need to say Tell me that it's not my fault Tell me that I'm all you want Even when I break your heart

Yeah, I KNOW.

ME!

I hate that song, next.

I’m kidding, this actually brings me good memories even though it’s kind of insupportable. As for a ship, this is Kim Yura and Abe Chiyo. Eleanor and Zeev!!! And WNDR when they are getting ready in the dorm.

I know that I'm a handful, baby, uh I know I never think before I jump And you're the kind of guy the ladies want (And there's a lot of cool chicks out there)

[...]

I know that I went psycho on the phone I never leave well enough alone And trouble's gonna follow where I go

I underestimated how much of Eleanor and Zeev this is.

I know I tend to make it about me I know you never get just what you see But I will never bore you, baby

YeAH, BoY.

It’s Nice To Have A Friend

Me to You, until I realized this was a romantic song and went all “well’... So, to sum up, as a ship this is straight-up Gok Inna and Pyongho. Just check out the genius description: “ Infused with steel drums, It’s Nice to Have A Friend is a dreamy ballad about two friends meeting in school and ending up getting married. It recalls the similar love story of children growing up together and falling in love.” We don’t even need to read the lyrics after that, I agree.

Daylight

This is another song with different ships to different situations. First, it’s Yohan and Sebin. Jinah and Bokyum. Danbi and Daehyun... Basically, everyone that went through a lot before finding their true love. Again, let’s take a look at the Genius description: “In the final song on her album Lover, Taylor Swift sings about struggling through previous relationships, beginning to doubt her ability to find true love, until she meets someone who brightens her life in a new way. She refers to being unlucky in love in the past, but when she meets her new partner, she only wants to focus on them and their happiness together.” Gotcha?

I don't wanna look at anything else now that I saw you I don't wanna think of anything else now that I thought of you I've been sleeping so long in a 20-year dark night And now I see daylight, I only see daylight

I can only think of Yohan and Sebin finding each other, but you could also see where I thought about there other two here too. Jinah and Bokyum? Totally random but totally meant to be. And Danbi and Daehyun were both like in a love maze thing until they realized how stupid they were since the start.

Luck of the draw only draws the unlucky And so I became the butt of the joke I wounded the good and I trusted the wicked Clearing the air, I breathed in the smoke Maybe you ran with the wolves and refused to settle down Maybe I've stormed out of every single room in this town Threw out our cloaks and our daggers because it's morning now It's brighter now, now

I swear TO GOD, THIS SONG!!!!! What a great way to finish an album and my thread... *heart emoji*

#ITS OUT AND ABOUT!!#*a

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itsblosseybitch · 6 years ago

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Off-Hollywood Producers: Interviews with Griffin Dunne & Amy Robinson by Clarke Taylor (Sept 1985; Part 1)

It could be said of Griffin Dunne and Amy Robinson that, as producers, they represent the refined essence of what independent film-making in America, in 1985, is all about. By their own admission, they live “charmed lives” as producers. They have managed to make the movies they wanted to make, the way they wanted to make them: humane films about people living and struggling through their particular time, made on single-digit budgets--from $2.5 million to $4 million ($5.9 million to $9.5 million in 2019) --unheard of these days in Hollywood. (OP NOTE: God damn this sentence aged well) And they are doing all of this at a comfortable distance from Hollywood, in New York.

There were two films--Joan Micklin Silver’s Chilly Scenes of Winter (co-produced with Mark Metcalf), released by United Artists in 1979 as Head Over Heels, and re-released by UA Classics in 1982 with the original title of the Ann Beattie novel on which it was based, and John Sayles’s Baby, It’s You, distributed by Paramount in 1983. Now Dunne and Robinson are hoping that After Hours, directed by Martin Scorcese, will be their “breakthrough” film. Its $4 million budget was financed through a bank loan (as was Baby, It’s You) and was picked up by the David Geffen Company for distribution through Warner Bros.

After Hours in one way represents a synthesis of what Dunne and Robinson , both of whom started out as actors, say they want to do: focus on both the creative and the business side of film-making. For Dunne, who has pursued his acting career in films such as An American Werewolf in London, Johnny Dangerously, and Almost You, Scorcese’s new film may also mark a turning point. Dunne plays the leading role in the film, a nightmarish New York comedy, heading a cast that includes Teri Garr, Cheech and Chong, and Rosanna Arquette.

Whatever the outcome for Dunne, he and Robinson have two other feature films in development: The Foreigner, a comedy by Larry Shue, at Disney, and an untitled project at Lorimar, based on the producers’ own story idea about the children of sixties underground radicals. They are thinking about producing a third property, The Moonflower Vine, a “family saga” by Jetta Carlton, as a television miniseries.

(OP NOTE: The Foreigner never materialized, and so far, I have no information as to why. The film about sixties underground radicals would eventually become Running On Empty (1988), directed by Sidney Lumet and starring River Phoenix and Martha Plimpton. The Moonflower Vine didn’t materialize either, but I found a blog post by writer Kathleen Rowell about that project, who was going to adapt the screenplay.)

Question: How do you see yourself--as an actor or as a producer?

Griffin Dunne: I always see a hyphen between those two words. It’s just that one always takes precedence over the other, depending on the project. Certainly I’ve made very different choices as an actor than I have as a producer, up until now.

Question: How have the choices been different, and what do you mean, up until now?

Dunne: I’ve acted in films I would have never produced, and I haven’t been very selective, or taken the films very seriously. Often it’s been because of the pay, or because I’ve liked the people who were involved, or because I thought I might do a good enough job with the character I was playing to get the next job. I’ve cared much less about the overall movie, the director, or how well it might do at the box office. After Hours has revitalized my interest in acting: it’s really inspired me.

Question: This is what you mean when you talk about taking your future acting choices more seriously?

Dunne: Yes. With this film I think I’ve crossed the line that divided my acting and producing choices. Now, as an actor, I’m taking into consideration all the things I’ve always thought about as a producer: Am I repeating myself? What about the overall film? Who’s the director? I don’t want to make a nothing picture next, no matter how I might shine.

Question: You started out as an actor, rather than as a producer.

Dunne: Actually, I set out in another direction altogether. I wanted to be a journalist. But there was a guy at my boarding school [Fountain Valley, in Colorado] who talked me into auditioning for The Zoo Story, the Edward Albee play, and this changed my direction, my life. I got that part. It was at this same school where I got caught smoking dope and was kicked out. (OP NOTE: He also got cast in the school’s production of Othello, playing Iago. What I would give to see that)

Question: But you continued to act?

Dunne: Yes, back in Los Angeles I very quickly got roles in TV series, such as Mannix (OP NOTE: will have to track this one down), but I also realized that I was not going to learn how to act from television. I started studying, but I only lasted for about eight months. I enrolled in a kind of let-it-all-happen class, with a lot of weird people, including Miss Linda Lovelace. It was very unsatisfying, very disillusioning-it was a terrible class, that’s what I’m trying to say.

Question: What did you do?

Dunne: I headed for New York and enrolled at the Neighborhood Playhouse. I also started to go up on auditions, and in no time I got an audition for a segment of Kojak [the TV show]. It turned out I didn’t get the part, but at the time I thought everything was going to happen incredibly fast. Instead, for the next four years, I continued to read Backstage and go up on auditions for plays that never happened. I also waited on tables, which I hated more than anything.

Question: What was this period like for you?

Dunne: Very discouraging. There was this one woman with a long Russian name who claimed to be the writer and director of a new play, who was the first to say to me, “You’re going to be great.” She said I was perfect for the part she was casting in her play, so she sent all the other actors who had come to the open casting call home, and took me out for coffee. I soon realized that she was stark raving mad, and then I realized she was a bag lady. I also realized that anyone can hold open casting calls in an effort to meet people, although this is one trick I haven’t employed yet as a producer.

Question: It was during this period that you met Amy Robinson?

Dunne: Yes. I met Amy and Mark Metcalf, another actor, and eventually our co-producer on Chilly Scenes of Winter. None of us were getting much work, so to keep ourselves busy we tried to mount an off-off-Broadway production of a Sam Shepherd play, Cowboy Mouth. We never did. But one day Amy showed us Chilly Scenes, and we became interested in producing the film.

Question: Once Chilly Scenes was out of the way, did you set out on a plan of action to produce more, to act more?

Dunne: At that point, we had no game plan. We were just three actors who produced a movie. But interest was generated in us; suddenly, we were New York producers.

Question: Is there an advantage to being based in New York?

Dunne: Well, we’re here in part because there are fewer producers here. We’re also here because none of us wanted to live in Los Angeles; we go there to pitch our projects. But there are also a lot of creative people who are known here before they go to L.A. and become famous. We can also shoot a film on a smaller budget here because the NABET [The National Association of Broadcast Employees and Technicians] crews are here; we’ve used these crews on our last two films.

Question: Did either of you think of directing after Chilly Scenes, instead of producing, since you all came from the more creative side of the business?

Dunne: Our first inclination was to continue to produce; I don’t know why, except that we had no directing experience. Also, it was at the time Sylvester Stallone started to direct the Rocky films, and it seemed at every meeting [with a studio] someone would say, “Now, you don’t plan to direct...?”

Question: How did you come upon the script for After Hours?

Dunne: Amy was handed the script, which is by a first-time scriptwriter, Joe Minion, while she was lecturing at Sundance [Robert Redford’s film study center in Utah] a couple of years ago. She read it, saw it as a vehicle for me, and we optioned it. Naturally, I agreed that the role was for me.

Question: How did Martin Scorcese come into the picture, and how did you convince him that the role was for you?

Dunne: He simply seemed the perfect director, and he said yes. We then sat down to talk about casting, and some people we had in mind, such as Teri Garr, who’s in the film. I forget who was doing the talking--at some point, I blanked out--but Amy spoke up and said, “Griffin would like to play Paul.” He said fine, just like that.

Question: This is one example of when playing producer and actor pays off.

Dunne: Well, I think I’d come very close anyway, but there might have been some flavor-of-the-month actor who would have gotten the role, and luckily I didn’t have to deal with that.

Question: What was it like working with Scorcese?

Dunne: Well, it’s the largest role I’ve ever had, and unlike the other roles, where I’ve pretty much relied on my natural behavior, the character moves from A to Z--typical Scorcese anxiety-induced behavior. Scorcese’s also the first director I’ve worked with who understood the character as well as I.

I’ve never worked harder for anybody in my life, and I was filled with energy at the start of each new day. He makes great demands on you to get the scene right. Scorcese gets what he needs in the first or second take, but he might do a dozen more, just to see what might turn up. You don’t leave for the day until you’ve done the best work possible.

Question: It sounds as though Scorcese can be very demanding, even obsessive, to work with.

Dunne: Yes. But he’s also able to laugh at himself. For instance, Marty is allergic to cigarette smoking. There’s absolutely no smoking allowed on the set. He’d come on the set, and even if someone had been smoking hours before, he could smell it and would come on the set saying “Who’s smoking? Who’s smoking?” There was this one night--most all our shooting was night shooting in the Tribeca section of New York--during a scene in which my character came around the corner, scared to death of something that had been happening to him, sprawled on his knees, and screamed to the heavens, “What do you want from me?” Suddenly, from a window above the street, this woman stuck her head out and began shouting, “Shut up, shut up!” Of course, she ruined that take, but Marty noticed that a cigarette was hanging out of her mouth, and as though to add insult to injury, he yelled to the crew, “Tell that woman to put her cigarette out!”

Question: What is it about Scorcese that calls on the actor’s total commitment?

Dunne: Well, his enthusiasm is infectious. For instance, there was this one scene that required a Steadicam operator to run back and forth through aisles of desks in an office to the accompaniment of Mozart of a jaunty piece of Mozart that Marty had chosen. The guy was a new, young Steadicam operator, Larry McComkey, and working with Scorcese was a great opportunity for him. Anyway, after going through this scene once, carrying seventy pounds of equipment on his back, and sweaty and exhausted, Larry came up to Marty and said, “How was it?” Marty said, “It was good, it was good, but you hear that music? You have to run with the music, feel the music, and keep going until it’s over.”

We had a lunch break, and just as though he was an actor, Larry stayed behind to prepare for the next take of the scene. After lunch, he had a whole new expression on his face, a look of total commitment to his work. We went through the scene again, and he did it perfectly, this time dancing elaborately with the camera on his back between all the desks to the beat of the music. Afterward, he came up to Marty and asked, “How was that?” “Perfect, perfect,” Marty said, “except for that fourth beat.” And suddenly, they were standing around talking about Mozart. Marty had tapped into the camera operator’s creative side, and made him work hard for him just like he makes actors go through take after take after take.

Question: Did anyone during the production become confused as to your roles as both actor and producer?

Dunne: Well, there was a second AD, and it of course was the AD’s job to let actors know when they were called for shooting. He seemed terribly confused about whether he was to call me, assuming, since I was a producer, I would know of the call. I missed an entire rehearsal because of this--nobody had told me about the rehearsal. So I made a firm point of this and said to him, “I am an actor, and you are a second AD.”

Question: Were there occasions on this film when your tendency to produce overcame your concentration on acting?

Dunne: Well, first of all, Marty and Amy and I were in sync on this from the start, so I didn’t have to worry about such things as “control.” But when I’m acting, the tendency is to drop the producing ball altogether. The phrase “meal penalty” never crossed my mind. Of course, during pre-production, I’d worked on locations, script, casting, but once production began the only way I’d know about problems was if I were to ask. The only problem I actually caught wind of on this picture was that a lot of film was being used. This was because of all the takes Marty shoots, which, as an actor, I love. And since most of the footage being shot was with me, I didn’t see this as a “problem” at all. As far as I was concerned, we had all the time and all the takes in the world. But seriously, knowing that Amy thought we were using a lot of film caused me a slight distraction, but I was able to use this anxiety in my role.

Question: Once After Hours stopped shooting, did you find it difficult to fit back into your role as a producer?

Dunne: Yes. At first there wasn’t a lot for me to do at the office, because things had been running fine without me. I found that if I waited to pick up my own responsibilities, such as obtaining music rights for the film--it turned out I always dealt with music rights to our movie--I found that I really had to assert myself. And I did, because this producing really gives me a tremendous stability. This is one of the reasons I’ve never good at being an unemployed actor. I hated waking up in the morning and thinking, All I have to do is go to the gym. Now I don’t go to the gym; I go to the office.

Question: This sounds like a bizarre film, not by Scorcese standards, perhaps, but by your standards, and Amy’s.

Dunne: It’s certainly the most extreme movie we’ve ever produced, and the most controversial.

Question: Controversial in what way?

Dunne: In the way it speaks to a kind of paranoia and victimization that I think a lot of people living in big cities can relate to. It’s a nightmarish quality of the story that appealed to me, and that I found very funny. I’ve had nights like this in New York, on a more mundane level, when there’s a chain of reaction of events over which you have no control. Just today, on the way to this interview, I passed two men in business suits, on Fifth Avenue, going at it, hitting away at each other. My inclination was to try to break them up--I could so easily have become involved in a mess.

Question: You think the gates are open to the kinds of movies you and Amy want to produce?

Dunne: The great thing about the movie business is that it’s totally unpredictable; the rules are always changing. The kinds of movies the studios are making now are based on what’s been successful in the past, and success comes in lots of unexpected ways. Amy and I want to make movies that a lot of people want to see. If they do, if After Hours makes a lot of money--and it can, because it cost so little to make--we’ll have more credibility with the studios the next time out with the kind of movie we want to make.

Question: And Griffin Dunne will have more credibility as an actor as well. Are you prepared to make hard choices of which role you will play next, actor or producer?

Dunne: I’m told that one of the advantages of being tremendously successful is that you can arrange your life in the way you wish. This is what I’m told.

#griffin dunne #after hours #after hours 1985 #martin scorcese #amy robinson #interview #archive #back issue #american film #american film magazine #chilly scenes of winter #an american werewolf in london #johnny dangerously

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