#yeah this is why i started holding off on seeking certain critques

[angelsaxis]

There's always that struggle I have with taking critiques with a grain of salt. I try to be understanding and I may put too much weight on someone else's perspective specifically because it's not mine. But you know. This one critiquer who frequently told me I lacked subtext. And the one time I apparently had achieved it in my writing was when Arvin and Tibe were arguing about trying to get the former to eat more, and Tibe asks Arvin who it was the decided his incredibly small meals are appropriate, implying that it was Arvins mom who controlled his meals (which was correct). And they were like "yes!!! Subtext!!!"

And I scratched my head. Because I've been doing that. Not through quotes as much but through body language and general behavior. Arvin is afraid of his mom and the first thought he has about Chima when he sees her is "she reminds me of my mother" and then he tries to avoid her for as long as possible. There's a double motive to every act of kindness tibe does for arvin. I don't say it out loud ofc bc I frankly. Don't think I need to.

"why does Arvin do X" because his ultimate goal in life is to please his mom "but why" she's abusive and controlling and she's isolated him socially for 18 years and controls everything from who he talks to to what he's even able to eat. He's 18 and he's never been anywhere without his mother and the first thing he hopes to ask for from his parents (his mother) is to travel on his own and his fear in that moment is that he'll be genuinely yelled at for eating dessert before dinner.

I'm not the best writer but I lay all of this out almost verbatim in the first chapter. First chapter. I don't like dialogue and I prefer distilled quotes to lengthy ones so perhaps this is why this person was insisting that I guess every character just says what's on their mind all the time? Supposedly? Even though they also don't do that? Like were they hoping that more of the characters would just lie or be passive aggressive or something (both of which people do). Like I'm so confused. Critiquers can say important and correct things but they also like to critique in a way where they're telling you what THEY like to see and this isn't the first and certainly won't be the last time I get a vague or incomplete critique from someone. Mind you this person could not figure out social ranking at ALL a common critique from them "why doesn't X character say (wildly inappropriate thing given social ranking an context and familiarity)" like girl come on. "Why does Arvins dad treat him like this" the man who's a distant alcoholic and serial cheater??? You're asking why that man isn't nice to his family????

"why is drei mean to arvin" oh the brother with the alcohol issues and the loyalty issues and the ego issues? Why isn't he perfectly nice to arvin 100% of the time? But then when Arvins aunt is nice to him that's a problem because now he's not learning. But also also when Drei actually does help Arvin in multiple present if subtle ways that just doesn't ping your radar. Make up your MIND.