#yeah the king can die now i am done caring about him

[hauntingblue]

Jaya time

I love these moments of nearly cosmic horror when they encounter inexplicable things (at first) they are so intriguing

Is strawhat here?! *Megan thee stallion saying AAH 😜*

This cover just goes hard... Get it chopper

[nikibogwater]

I watched The Last Unicorn (1982) with very, very little prior knowledge of the film. And I wasn't planning to, but I ended up taking notes because wow. This movie. It's something.

The very little prior knowledge I had was as follows: it's an old animated film about a unicorn and I've occasionally heard people talk about it fondly. That's it, that's literally all I had going into this thing. It was not nearly enough to prepare me.

Ohhhh I love the scenery! Man, nothing hits quite like a traditional hand-drawn backgrou--OH MY WORD WHAT IS THAT WHY IS IT MOVING LIKE THAT STOP IT

Ohhh, this is a Rankin-Bass production? Well, that explains the animation.

Yeah that is not a unicorn, that's a llama with a table-knife glued to its head.

Ooh, the opening credits play over a lightly animated medieval tapestry! That's so coo--aaaaand they picked the most 80's sounding song I can imagine to go over it, okay.

Yo this butterfly is stoned out of his little buggy mind, maybe he should get some rehab.

Love that it's not immediately clear what the "red bull" actually is yet. Is it a literal bull? Is it a raging fire? Is it the inescapable march of industrial progress?? Gotta stay tuned to find out. (edit: it was literally just a bull and I need to stop reading symbolism into every little thing).

Ok ngl, the "Man's Road" sequence was actually fire, despite (or perhaps because of) the 80's cheese.

Angela Lansbury!!! Man, she just ate this role. Who'd've thought Mrs. Pots could sound so threatening?

I would die for Shmendrick.

Oh that is a very lore-accurate harpy right there. (⊙_⊙;)

Love how the witch's carnival arc touches on the idea of truth vs. wishful delusion. There's a beautiful irony in a movie about a literal unicorn talking about the importance of staying grounded in what is real and truly beautiful.

No, seriously, I would die for Shmendrick. Protect this precious man at all costs.

Can we pretty please stop calling the witch Mommy

"That's my immortality!" eyo this witch is actually a great villain. Really wish she could've stuck around for the whole movie.

Awww, the unicorn is taking care of Shmendrick! That's so sweet! God knows he needs it.

Shmendrick: Run! We'll find each other later! *immediately gets captured*

Have I mentioned that I would die for Shmendrick.

I feel like the entire bit with the outlaws had a lot of connecting shots cut out for time because I really couldn't follow any of what was happening.

Hehehe...That tree looks like a butt. I wonder if they did that on purpo--WHAT THE HELL

*nervously glancing over my shoulder to make sure my family doesn't see me watching this*

Unicorn to the rescue!! Thank heavens.

"That was true magic." Then please don't ever do true magic again.

"How dare you come to me now, when I am this?!" H-hey, nobody told me this movie was gonna go that hard...

Mom-friend acquired! Just in time, too. Unicorn looked like she was getting real tired of being the only one with two brain cells to rub together.

Our heroes: *bracing themselves for what may be the darkest, most dangerous part of their journey* Freakin' Gerry Beckley from "America:" 🎵MOON RISIN'! DISGUISIN'!! 🎵 Gotta love that tonal dissonance.

Oooh hey the animation on the Red Bull is actually kind of good!

Molly: DO SOME MAGIC! Shmendrick: I CAN'T! Molly: YES U CAN I BELIEVE IN U Shmendrick: *does some magic* Molly: NOOOOO WHAT HAVE U DONE Molly I love you, but make up your darn mind.

Love that being turned into a human being is like, the worst thing that could ever happen to the unicorn. Yeah, being human is a pretty awful experience.

Boy there is just empty static behind Prince Lir's eyes. Homeboy doesn't have a thought in his head and probably never will.

Lir: babe look I got u a severed dragon head pls love me

Oh yeah. Marry this one, Unicorn. He's a keeper.

Molly: Shmendrick will help! Unicorn: I hope for no help from him. He is no magician now, but the king's clown.

GURL SAY THAT AGAIN! U KEEP DISRESPECTING MY BOI SHMENDRICK AND U WILL GET THESE HANDS!

The pirate cat is now my second-favorite character. I've known him for all of 10 seconds, but I love him.

He doesn't actually purr. He just says, "Purr, purr." I love him even more now.

"No cat anywhere ever gave anyone a straight answer." Most accurate line ever put to film.

Unicorn, please marry Prince Lir, you well never find a purer source of Himbo Energy than him. Look at him, he's even singing badly for you, you gotta take this one.

"I mean you can't really be that ridiculous magician's niece--" BETRAYAL. OUTRAGE. SCANDAL. I DISOWN YOU, LIR, YOU FOUL SERPENT WHO SPEAKS NOTHING BUT FILTH. I HOPE THE UNICORN BREAKS YOUR STUPID LITTLE HEART

Dang. This guy voicing the skeleton is putting his entire heart and soul into that laugh.

Prince "I love whom I love" Lir will not be stopped even by the threat of potential bestiality. I'd say Husband Goals, but first of all, ew, and second, he insulted Shmendrick so he is dead to me.

"I wish to God I didn't care about anything but my magic, but I do!" Oh Shmendrick, honey... 🥺

Yooo, that transformation back into her unicorn form was actually sick. For a Rankin-Bass made-for-tv movie, this thing pulls off some surprisingly good animation every once in a while.

Yeah, kick his magical red butt, little unicorn! Go save your boyfriend and your family!!!

What is it with Christopher Lee and playing creepy old guys who get thrown off of towers at the end

Wait, no, I only sort of meant it when I said the unicorn should break Lir's heart, I didn't think they'd actually do it!

Molly ditched her outlaw husband to travel the world with Shmendrick and honestly, I'd do the same if I was in her place.

Oh wow. She chose to save her own kind and return to her forest even though she loved Lir. This is actually very bittersweet and--GOTDANGIT GERRY BECKLEY, NOT NOW!!!

Closing thoughts: This movie was an absolute trip and I'm probably going to think it was a fever dream I once had after some time has passed. It's also the only movie I can think of that I would actually want a remake/remaster of. The story was great, though it jumped around from place to place so quickly that it was sometimes hard to follow what was happening. I like the characters a lot (mostly Shmendrick tbh but they're all good), and I wish there had been more time to let them interact with each other. You can see the potential for chemistry between the different personalities, but it's stifled by moments of awkward voice acting and the strange, jittery character animation. With more time to breathe and better animation, this story would really be something amazing. I'm actually very interested in reading the original novel it was based on now, I'll have to see if I can get my hands on a copy. All in all, The Last Unicorn (1982) is a mind-boggling experience with surprisingly deep themes combined with what I can only assume is what you see when you're on acid. If you have any interest, I would highly recommend seeing this thing for yourself.

Yes. Even the Boob Tree. Please. I don't want to be the only one who is cursed to have that scene in my brain.

[munchmemes]

mitski lyrics, The Land Is Inhospitable And So Are We edition

❛ as i got older, i learned i'm a drinker. sometimes a drink feels like family. ❜

❛ did you go and make promises you can't keep? ❜

❛ amateur mistake, you can take it from me. ❜

❛ i try to remember the wrath of the devil was also given to him by god. ❜

❛ i have a hope and though she's blind with no name, she shits where she's supposed to and feeds herself while i'm away. ❜

❛ sometimes i think it would be easier without [them] but i know nothing can hurt me when i see [their] sleeping face. ❜

❛ all of our love is filling all of our room. ❜

❛ now i bend like a willow, thinking of [you/them]. ❜

❛ i sip on the rest of the coffee [you/they] left like it's a kiss left of [you/them]. ❜

❛ something set free is running through the night and the dark awaits us all around the corner. ❜

❛ here in our place we have for the day, can we stay a while and listen for heaven? ❜

❛ i don't like my mind, i don't like being left alone in a room with all its opinions about the things that i've done. ❜

❛ so, yeah, i blast music loud and i work myself to the bone and on an inconvenient christmas, i eat a cake. a whole cake, all for me. ❜

❛ there's another memory that gets stuck inside the walls of my skull waiting for its turn to talk. and it may be a few years but you can bet it's there, waiting still for me to be left alone in a room full of things that i've done. ❜

❛ i want someone to take this soul, i can't bear to keep it. ❜

❛ i'd give it just to give and all i will take are the consequences. ❜

❛ your pain is eased but you'll never be free. ❜

❛ there's a deal that i made. ❜

❛ when memories snow and cover up the driveway, i shovel all those memories and clear the path to drive to the store. ❜

❛ and if i break, could i go on break? ❜

❛ i'll be back in my room, writing speeches in my head. ❜

❛ my love is mine, all mine. ❜

❛ nothing in the world belongs to me but my love is mine, all mine. ❜

❛ nothing in the world is mine for free but my love. ❜

❛ after everyone's long been gone but me, i was hiding or forgotten. the only one left. ❜

❛ now the world is mine alone with no one to share the memory. ❜

❛ you're my best friend. now i've no one to tell how i lost my best friend. ❜

❛ remember when we met, we acted like two fools. we were so glad to have found it. ❜

❛ that love is like a star. it's gone, we just see it shining. it's traveled very far. i'll keep a leftover light burning so you can keep looking up. isn't that worth holding on? ❜

❛ you know i'd always been alone till you taught me to live for somebody. ❜

❛ you believe me like a god. i destroy you like i am. ❜

❛ i'm sorry i'm the one you love. ❜

❛ no one will ever love me like you again. ❜

❛ so, when you leave me, i should die. i deserve it, don't i? ❜

❛ one day, you'll figure me out and i'll meet judgement by the hounds. ❜

❛ people always gave me love. others were never to blame after all. ❜

❛ you believe me like a god. i betray you like a man. ❜

❛ stride through the house naked. don't even care that the curtains are open. ❜

❛ let the darkness see me. ❜

❛ streets are mine, the night is mine. all my own. ❜

❛ oh, how i love me after you. i'm king of all the land. ❜

[hekate1308]

Fictober #4, No, We're Not Doing That

Prompt: No, We're Not Doing That

Fandom: Supernatural

Cas has been growing weaker for some time now.

Normally, dean would be concerned but with everything they have been through over the years, he confronted him about it the second after they had finished a hunt where Cas had been thrown around more than he should have, and the result was – the explanation – the point –

Well – Cas is falling. His grace is slowly being drained away.

Normally, Dean would make a big deal out of it, try to prevent it, to help in any way he can, but it’s Cas choice. He confirmed it and there is nothing influencing him, Dean knows that (and if he had to call a certain demon to make certain and now owes Crowley a favour, that is his problem, and his problem alone. The king of hell knowns what he can ask for anyway these days).

But still, this is what is happening – Cas is falling and there is nothing to be done because he wants nothing to be done because he wants to be human, live and bleed and then die alongside them, and Dean doesn’t know what to do about it because – because –

In the end, its’ that Cas, as a human, will be – he supposes the word would be available, in a way he’s never really been before because there was always something going on. Not that means anything will change, because why should it. Absolutely ridiculous. They’ve known each other for so long now, if anything should have happened, it would have a long time ago.

So, really, what remains is to be Cas’ friend through it all, and he’s done his best to be exactly that. After all, it’s one thing to occasionally having been close to human and then regaining one’s grace and quite another to fall once and for all and throw one’s lot in with the mortals.

So, he’s made sure he knows about proper nutrition, prompting quite a few sniggers from Sam, that eh wraps up properly when it’s cold, much as he is fond of the trench coat, that no, staring at people for longer than five seconds without blinking is not considered normal (alright maybe some won’t notice but others think Cas is a weirdo for it, and he doesn’t want them to treat him badly for it). They’ve rubbed along quite well, all things considered.

The hunts are another matter. Naturally Cas wants to help. Of course he does. He has been working with them for so long anything else would be unthinkable, but the problem is that he – that he –

He just isn’t as strong as he used to be, and that’s not an insult, that’s just a fact. He can’t burn people’s eyes out anymore, and that’s just one example.

He still has his knowledge, and the fighting skills he has retained as human, so he is not completely helpless, but still, it never hurts to be careful, or he’ll be toast faster than he can blink, and Dean is not risking that, not when it’s probable he’ll end up in hell again once everything is over and done with and he’ll never see Cas again.

Still…

The most difficult part really, is the invincible part. Or the close to invincible part. Aka what Cas was used to being before he became human, so he still tries to act like a shield for them when he really can’t anymore.

“No, we're not doing that" Dean decides on today’s hunt because they don’t even know what exa5tcl it is they are hunting and he’s not sending anyone in without proper intel.

“Dean” he argues “a decoy would help our chances –“

“Yeah, but this thing is dangerous, and it’s better not to risk it.”

Sam, as usual when it comes to such discussions, these days has decided not to say anything, which is fine by Dean because he tends to take Cas’ side even when it’s obvious he should agree with him.

“But – “

“I said we’re not doing that.”

“I’m a hunter” he spits “I am not useless”.

And it is only then that dean realizes what the problem is.

Oh. Cas thinks – that he thinks – that he believes – “That’s not it, man” he quickly says. “I just want – I’m just worried. I couldn’t bear if something happened to you.”

That’s a little bit closer to the full truth than he ever wanted to admit.

“I –“ and they’re looking at one another again, or staring as Sam keeps calling it, and he has no idea how to deal with this.

Then Cas says “I don’t know hat I would do if something happened to you, either” and then they are kissing.”

Not quite sure how that happened, but dean is cool with it.

They’ll figure that out later even as he hears Sam clear his throat and exclaim, “Well I’ll just go check out the human-devouring monster shall I?”

[lokisprettygirl]

Okay I finally watched the episode and I have several feelings so here we go...

If you haven't watched the show, stop reading. (Though I hope you have blocked the spoilers tag, if not it's your own fault..don't come at me)

Am I dying every second thinking about him being alone there for eternity? Obviously 😭

But am i stupid or delusional enough to think he won't make a comeback in the next Avengers movie? No.

I don't think those people can fight kang without loki, they would at some point need his help because he's literally the most powerful god out there now.

Coming back to the episode there's not much I cared about, I probably wouldn't have blinked if ob, b15 or Casey would have died..didn't care about them at all if I was being honest and it's not the character's fault.

As much I hated the ship (because god forbid two male characters are friends in any show these days because they have to be lovers otherwise it's homophobia.. remember when bromance existed? Good times)

Mobius had a good character development that began in season 5 and continued this season unlike Sylvie who started as such a badly written selfish character that the only way they could have fixed it this season was to completely sideline her, which thankfully they did. The smirk and smile at the end even knowing that she may never get to see Loki again? (Yeah just die already).

Hopefully I'll never have to see her again.

Coming back to Loki (my precious baby love) i know his arc ended on a bittersweet note (that smile at the end just warmed my heart like never before) and it's more bitter for me than sweet because I can't handle the thought of him being so lonely because this is not what he wanted or deserved but then I think about Loki who died via strangulation and I'm like fuck everything, this is definitely much better than that ending.

Personally I think with time he's going to grow and learn to control this new power (or he could just clone himself and use him in a way? Idk Marvel can do anything) but I can feel it in my bones that this is not the end of him (unless ofcourse Tom is done with him and won't return for future projects)

That being said, Loki is alive and sure he is alone at the moment but he's a hero now, he has more than redeemed himself and he can finally forgive himself for everything that he didn't do right, perhaps this is what he needed to find that sense of purpose he has been looking for all his life. Hopefully he'd see himself as the god that he always was.

A man that was always ridiculed for his selfishness and narcissism chose to save the multiverse by sacrificing his freedom, by giving up his own free will. He chose everything he didn't want, a throne and what seemed like eternal solitude (but hopefully not)..a man of actions indeed. His arc reminds me of Tony in a way and that's beautiful.

Wherever you go, it's just death, destruction, the literal ends of worlds!

Uhhhhhuh? Look what my boy just did for the whole fucking multiverse.

I'm just trying to see the silver lining here that he's alive and he's the moment..he's everything, he literally became the most powerful being to ever exist in mcu and that gives me hope for him…he'd come back. Kang's arc started with him and they'd need him when the time comes. If not I got my fanfiction powers 🤣 (He deserves to find the sort of love that would stay by his side even if he's all that person would ever get)

Thank God they changed the writers this season and fixed somewhat of the mess they had made of this majestic, ethereal god last time.

Overall yeah my heart is breaking for him but look at him..he's the moment, he's the king of the multiverse, he's everything.

[fangirlingtodeath513]

Kinktober Day 1 - First Time

Read here on AO3 Rating: Explicit Ships: Castiel/Dean Winchester Tags: Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Porn, Smut, Castiel/Dean Winchester First Time Having Sex, First Time, Anal Fingering, Grinding, Dirty Talk, Kinktober, Anal Sex, Human Castiel (Supernatural), Post-Finale, Post-Season/Series Finale

Dean’s hands are clammy. He knew this was the endgame of the night, obviously, and he’s been looking forward to it for like a week now, but it’s surreal. He’s actually nervous. He can’t remember the last time he was nervous for sex. Then again, he also can’t remember the last time he had sex with someone he genuinely cared about.

“Are you alright, Dean?” Castiel’s hand settles on his thigh. Fuck, even the sound of his voice is like a balm to Dean’s overactive mind. It brings a small smile to his lips and, before he can rethink it, he lifts Cas’s hand to his mouth and presses a kiss to his knuckles.

“I’m great. Better than great, actually. Can’t remember ever being this happy.”

Cas practically beams at that, and Dean can feel his heart beating faster. It’s hard to focus on driving when he feels like he could die from happiness, but he somehow manages to get them back to the little rental they booked for the weekend in one piece.

They deserve this. Hell, they deserve way more than this, but this is a start. The cabin is cute enough, with a hot tub on the back porch and a four-poster, king-size bed. They’d gotten here last night, but after a day spent in the car, they were both too exhausted to do much more than dump their bags on the floor and collapse into bed. Cas had woken up with some unfairly hot bedhead, but Dean had a plan for this weekend, and he wasn’t about to let it be ruined by some messy hair.

He releases Cas’s hand only long enough for them to both climb out of the car, quickly sliding his fingers between the former angel’s as they make their way up the porch. He revels in the tiny smile it brings to Cas’s lips.

“How are we doing on the whole “human for the second time around” thing? So far, at least.”

Castiel chuckles. “Well, I haven’t been murdered by a reaper yet.”

Dean huffs a laugh and punches the code into the lock on the door. “Yeah, I guess the bar was already pretty low.”

Castiel hums softly as Dean turns to close the door behind them, locking it and sucking in a deep breath. It doesn’t do much to calm his nerves.

“Are you alright?” Castiel asks softly, resting a hand on Dean’s shoulder. “We don’t have to do this if you don’t… want to.”

Dean scoffs. “No, I want to, Cas. I promise.” He takes another deep breath before turning to face Castiel. His eyebrows are pinched like he’s nervous Dean might reject him. He wonders how often Castiel worries about that. “You sure you want to?”

Castiel raises an eyebrow. “Am I sure that I want to finally have you underneath me after being in love with you for more years than I care to admit? Yes, I think so.”

Dean can feel the tips of his ears burning, so he doesn’t even want to imagine what his face looks like. “In love with, huh?” he asks, a stupid grin on his face.

Castiel rolls his eyes, but he smiles back as he leans in to draw Dean into a kiss. “Yes, Dean, I’m positive. Now are you going to stop stalling and come with me to the bedroom, or should I get started without you?”

Dean gapes at him. “Start without me? Now hang on a minute…”

Castiel shoots him a grin as he backs down the hallway toward the bedroom. Little fucker. He knows exactly how to push Dean’s buttons. It’s stupidly hot.

They both shed their layers on the way to the bedroom until they’re left barefoot, in their t-shirts and jeans. Dean pulls him into a kiss, winding his arms around Cas’s waist. They’ve done plenty of this since Castiel came back from the empty, blessedly alive and fully human. It had been an awkward few moments, considering Dean had shoved him against the nearest wall and made up for the decade they could have spent kissing if they hadn’t been such idiots. Sam had uncomfortably cleared his throat more than a few times, and god only knows what Jack was thinking, but Dean couldn’t find it in himself to care. He had his angel back, that was all that mattered.

He only pulls away long enough to tug Castiel’s shirt over his head, dropping it somewhere behind them and nudging Cas to sit on the bed. He shamelessly climbs onto his lap, threading a hand through his hair as he kisses and sucks his way down the former angel’s neck. Castiel’s hands are everywhere, roaming over every inch of Dean’s skin that he can reach. They finally settle on Dean’s thighs, holding him close as Cas draws him into another kiss. This one is filthy, all tongue, Castiel’s teeth scraping against Dean’s bottom lip. It drives Dean just a little bit insane, and it seems like Cas can tell since he does it again with a hint of a smirk on his lips. 

“Do you like that, Dean?” he murmurs, his voice distractingly deep and warm, rumbling against Dean’s chest as he laughs. “I’ve dreamed about this for so long. Watching you let go for me.”

Dean shivers, blinking a few times to regain some semblance of composure as he lets Castiel remove his shirt. He doesn’t even care where Castiel drops it, he’ll worry about finding it in the morning. It’s the least of his concerns right now, especially once he leans back long enough to take in the sight in front of him—Castiel, shirtless, chest heaving with a sheen of sweat and a smirk on his lips as he lets Dean drink in his fill.

“God, Cas,” he mutters, dragging a thumb over one of his nipples, noting the sharp intake of breath he gets in response. “You’re incredible.”

Castiel chuckles, the sound like a warm, fluffy blanket wrapping around Dean. “I could say the same about you, you know. You’re beautiful, Dean, and despite how much I’d love to sit here and stare at you—”

“So a normal night for you,” Dean interrupts with a smirk, laughing when Castiel rolls his eyes.

“As much as I’d love it, I’d much prefer to see how you feel around my cock.”

Dean swallows, tongue darting out to lick his lips. “Wow, that was… way hotter than it should have been.”

Castiel laughs. “Is that a yes?”

Dean nods quickly, sliding off Castiel’s lap long enough to ditch his jeans and boxers. Castiel does the same, so when Dean climbs back into his lap they’re both blessedly naked. He lets himself bask in the moment, pulling Castiel into a kiss as he rocks his ass along the length of Castiel’s hardness, sucking in a shuddering breath. It’s been a damn long time since he’s had anything other than a toy inside him and as much as he’d like to rush the process, he doesn’t want Castiel’s first time with him to be anything less than perfect. So he takes his time, getting them both wound so tightly they could snap before he even reaches for the bottle of lube he’d brought with them and, thankfully, stashed in the bedside table earlier.

Castiel snatches it from him with a wicked grin. “I’ve dreamt about this, too. May I?”

Dean swallows, nodding quickly. “Yeah, Cas, yeah, my god.” He shuffles off his lap, sprawling out on the bed and pulling Castiel on top of him. “Never wanted anything more in my life.”

Castiel pouts. Honest to god pouts. Dean feels like he could combust. “Not even me?”

“Fuck, you’re gonna be the death of me,” he breathes out, mostly to himself, tugging Castiel down into a kiss. “C’mon, want you inside me sooner than later.”

Castiel smirks. “Say please.”

Dean groans. “Please, Cas.”

He half expects a good boy thrown in there, but he doesn’t get one. Instead, he gets the click of the lube cap, so he leans up on his elbows to watch Castiel.

He’s gorgeous. His hair is a goddamn mess, his chest flushed a nice, warm red, and his eyes—they’ve got a wild look to them, but they’re so utterly focused on Dean that it makes his heart beat a little faster.

“Alright. You’re ready?”

He doesn’t think he has the strength to speak right now, so he just nods. Castiel shoots him a small smile and leans down to kiss him. He’s a fucking master with his tongue, so much so that Dean barely even registers his finger pushing into him. He groans against Castiel’s lips, letting his knees drop open even more, hopefully encouraging him to continue. Castiel seems to get the message, his tongue sliding into Dean’s mouth as a second finger splits him open. He’s effectively trapped between the sensations of Castiel’s tongue and fingers and there’s no place on Earth that he’d rather be.

Castiel breaks their kiss, and Dean just barely has the presence of mind to bite back a whine. “I’m not hurting you, am I?” Castiel asks softly, pressing a kiss to Dean’s jaw. 

Dean shakes his head quickly, sucking in a breath and pulling Cas’s mouth back to his. “Mm mm. Feels good, Cas. Can’t wait to have you inside me. C’mon, I can handle another.”

He feels Castiel shiver against him and grins, grinding against his fingers. It takes a minute, but eventually, Cas shakes himself from his stupor and presses a third finger into him. It burns, but Dean is wound so tight that he doesn’t even care. He wants Castiel inside him as quickly as possible, and honestly, even the burn feels a little bit good.

Still, he gets impatient after a few minutes, the burn faded and the thought of Cas splitting him open much more enticing than his fingers. “Ready, Cas, quit teasing,” he manages to get out, eyes fluttering closed when his fingers rub against his prostate, sending a warm jolt through him. “Fuck, please, want you inside me when I come,” he babbles, mostly lost to the sensation of Castiel’s fingers stretching him open and his mouth exploring every inch of Dean’s hot, flushed skin. Castiel seems to gather how far gone he is because after a moment his fingers are gone, quickly replaced with the blunt head of his slippery cock. 

“Tell me if I hurt you?” Castiel asks softly, brushing his fingers through Dean’s hair. Dean nods quickly, wrapping his legs around Cas’s waist. “Promise, now get in me.”

Castiel laughs, drawing Dean into a kiss as he pushes into him. Dean grunts, fingernails digging into Castiel’s shoulders. It burns, but he’s so damn close to coming that he doesn’t even care. He takes another breath, easing the burn a bit, and pulls Cas into another kiss. God, he could do this all day. Honestly, if they didn’t have other things to do, he just might. He adds that to the list of things he wants to try with Cas at some point, making a mental note to actually write that list down and give it to Cas sometime.

“Okay?” Castiel asks softly, kissing down Dean’s neck.

“Mmhm, fuck… so good, Cas,” he manages to reply, somewhat breathless as he finally bottoms out. “Can’t fuckin’ believe we could’ve been doing this all along,” he mutters, somewhat petulantly. Castiel laughs.

“Yes, well, hindsight is twenty-twenty, as they say. But we get to do it now.”

Dean hums, grinding against Castiel just a little bit. “Damn right we do. Several times tonight, at least, if I get my way,” he says with a smirk, though it quickly turns to a gasp when Castiel pumps his hips a little. 

“It would be my absolute honor to take you apart all night long, Dean,” Castiel purrs, fucking purrs, and Dean thinks he could die of happiness right here. Wouldn’t be a bad way to go, given all the ways he thought he’d die. 

“Too much talking, not enough fucking,” he gasps out instead, shivering when Castiel laughs. He expects some witty remark in return, but instead, Castiel just sits up and grabs Dean’s hips, pulling him into every thrust as he finds his rhythm. It’s punishing, and Dean’s almost certain he’s forgotten how to breathe, simply with the sight of Cas above him like his, hair a mess and a dark burn in his eyes. 

“I want to hear you when you come for me, Dean. I want to hear every moan, every stutter in your breath, every curse. I want it.”

Dean gasps, eyes fluttering closed as Castiel’s words sink in. He considers being a brat for a moment, but only a moment, before he realizes he’d much rather give Castiel what he wants. 

It doesn’t take long before he’s teetering on the edge of an orgasm, his grunts and muttered curses only seeming to spur Cas on. If he didn’t know any better, he’d think the man still had the stamina of an angel, with how relentless his thrusts have been.

“C-Cas, fuck, I can’t… I’m gonna…” he manages to choke out, eyes squeezing shut as Castiel’s warm hand wraps around his cock. It only takes a few rough strokes before he’s completely gone, boneless as he comes over his own stomach. Castiel’s not far behind though, his hips slamming into Dean’s a few more times before he spills white hot inside Dean, his shaky breaths the only thing still grounding Dean to this reality. 

They stay like that for a couple of minutes, catching their breath and blinking hazily at each other. Dean cracks first, a lazy grin on his lips as he pulls Castiel into a kiss.

“We really should have been doing that for the last decade.”

Castiel laughs and, yeah, that really is the best sound in the world.

[raayllum]

1 - favorite fic you wrote this year. 3 - favorite line/scene you wrote this year. 12 - favorite character to write about this year. 14 - a fic you didn’t expect to write. 21 - most memorable comment/review. And 24 - favorite fic you read this year.

I have no precision on fandom or fic... You are free to choose which fandom. Thus, you may make us discover other universes.

1) favourite fic you wrote this year

Looked through and discovered that I wrote 20 fics this year, which is wild, even if the majority are oneshots so... certainly have my pick an picks for various reasons!

These are the ones, probably:

This Fall Might Just Kill Me is 10.2k of Callum trying and failing to get purified, post-S4, and was one of my favourites and one I return to pretty often for a personal re-read. Very Callum/Rayla centric, some magic worldbuilding, and lots of devotion. Oneshot

Twice as Many Stars is 8.7k of Sir Sparklepuff is an existential horror story, the fic, featuring more religious trauma allegory than expected. Also a oneshot

Teach Me How to Name the Bigger Light a fanon s6 currently of 5 out of roughly 26-30ish chapters, and at 41k and counting. Main characters are Callum, Ezran, Rayla, and Claudia in about that order. It's a lot of fun, and a lot of angst

3) favourite line/scene this year

"If it's not you, it's not anyone" has one of my favourite love / Rayllum confessions I've ever written. I also loved this line from a (now non canon) fic regarding Kpp'Ar's feelings on Callum/people "There are many ways to mend broken things, if you can". I deeply enjoyed Callum threatening Nyx over Rayla's safety in this pre-S5 fic and this piece of description as well: "Callum knelt down in front of her, her cheeks heating as he reached up and pried the shawl away again, looking at the way the scar crept over her shoulder like dark ivy" + this Rayllum passage from "this fall just might kill me" (edit in the link):

“It’s because if I die,” he said, squeezing her hands. “I want you to be the last thing I ever see. And you are good enough, Rayla. You are . I don’t care if you destroy me. I don't care if we make each other better or worse or both. I love you. I’ll fall for you every time. I’ll choose to, I’ll choose you, every time.” 

I also really enjoyed writing Callum and Lujanne in "older but just never wiser" because it was interesting to revisit their dynamic now that well, Callum is older, powerful, and much more jaded/angry.

Drabbles wise this Rayllum one has one of my favourite metaphoric uses I've ever been able to pull off and I always love 1) writing messy Ezran and 2) Ezran being a little done with his brother's less than favourable methods, so this one for Ezran's "underhanded" comment for sure

But if I had to pick a singular exchange fic wise, it is of course the end of the Callum and Ezran fight from Ch4 of fanon s6, because it was a line that hurt me so much I was sad the rest of the day, and I also thought of it before writing a decent chunk of the boys' argument, so making sure it felt earned and hit the way I wanted to was very fun if also angsty. I apologize in advance lmao:

Only this time Callum scoffed, peeling away, his green eyes glinting. “Yeah, right.”  “I am your king and I forbid you—” “You don’t get to forbid me from doing anything because guess what?” A manic gleam overtook his brother’s face. “I don’t fucking care what you think, nevermind what you fucking decree. I’m freeing Runaan, and that’s final.”  “Then you can do it without my help,” Ezran said with a ragged breath. “Because I am not giving you my seal.”  Callum stared at him with cold eyes. “Dad would be so disappointed in you.” But this time Ezran was ready for the blow, as he said, “Well at least I called him Dad."

A shameless plug OG fantasy world wise was definitely this lines from my sequel WIP. You can learn more about it/the fantasy world here <3

The Alpha of the Crescents may have worn her old friend’s face and mannerisms, but the girls they’d both been were long dead, just like their families.  It was time to finish the job and bury them.

as well as

“Good. Vita willing I won’t live to see your next lives.” “Because seeing you again has been so pleasant,” Jamie muttered.

from book one

12) favourite character to write about this year

Given my above answers it's clearly been Callum, but Ezran has probably been my standout in "teach me how to name the bigger light," easy, even if I think Rayla's POV is going to sneak up on me more and more as the fic goes on, especially once we reach the chapters at the Starscraper. I've also written a somewhat decent amount of Kpp'Ar POV this year, I loved writing Claudia in "twice as many stars" in particular. Everyone? Can I say everyone?

But if I had to pick, Callum. (Non fic wise it's all the OG chosen one kiddos running around, I love 'em.)

14) a fic you didn't expect to write

Many days of angry muttering and half concocted plot points predated "teach me how to name the bigger light" and I am still slightly internally salty about it. However, it does feel good to have one last fanon season foray, especially since it's been four years since the last one, and I've been having a fucking blast, lemme tell you.

21) most memorable comment/review

This is hard because I do cherish every review and kind word I get (as well as anyone who leaves notes in their bookmarks) but there are some standouts. Basically anything from twice as many stars is fair game as well as this review on fanon s6, cause I'm gonna go the typical write route and say the long bois make my day / when readers catch onto the smaller details, that's absolutely my favourite:

@inamindfarfaraway <3 hope you've enjoyed the most recent chapter!

24) favourite fic you read this year

Have already done some TDP fic recs here so I'm gonna focus on what's in my bookmarks for now! I mostly read LOZ or SOC fics when I'm not making my way through TDP backlog, but this one for Six of Crows centreing on Inej and Kaz called High Wire Act stood out to me and I'm really enjoying "for the children we couldn't be" for TDP because it's trio centric and the exact kind of time travel fuckery I like to read.

This is tricky, though, cause I find most often the favourite things I participate in is like, the stuff I write because it's what I want to read and most tailored to my specific tastes? I also just don't read as much fic as I could / have in the past and it's hard to pick Just One Fic, y'know? So cop out answer, maybe, but this is the one!

[pleasantspark]

Azzy returned back to The Demon Realm covering his eye, he was suppressing the urge to break down in tears. But held himself together momentarily by reminding him that he was better than this, that any form of hurt was weakness, and that Razzamoth wouldn’t want him to show such disgusting emotions. The Demon arrived in the room where his Demon King resided and he clenched Razzamoth’s earrings so hard that it could’ve been turned to dust. With a shaky breath, Azzy knelt down.

“King Gomah.”

He greets, and grimaces, he always considered Gomah a pawn, an eventual pawn to use and once Razzamoth and Azzy became his loyal servants they planned to backstab and overthrow Gomah and make Razzamoth King of The Demon Realm.

That was the plan…

Or it was until they killed him. 

Razzamoth didn’t deserve death, if anything Azzy deserved it more. He deserved to die at the blade of the one he mutilated, took one for the team, but he did nothing, he was such a coward. 

“Azzy, what brings you here? Did you complete your mission?” Gomah asked, and Azzy shook his head. 

“Razzamoth’s dead…” Azzy paused, considering if he should come clean and tell Gomah who it was, “And it was Fu’s fault.” 

Gomah was silent before scoffing. “It was bound to happen, why you didn’t kill him when you had the chance, I don’t know.” 

Azzy’s face soured, he knew he failed. And he didn’t need this… this fake demon king to tell him and remind him of his failure. “I know! I know! But it ran past the allotted time we’re allowed for!” 

“I don’t care for the specifics, you let your leader die, we answer to King Yemma now.” Gomah said, “Part of the deal specifically states, we cull the populace of HFIL. Bi-Yearly, in exchange he and the others fund our research and buy our way to Heaven. If Razzamoth is dead, the contract is expired. Do I make myself clear?” 

“Yes, but I think it applies to you specifically. I don’t follow you anymore.” Azzy spat. Gomah was pissed.

“Excuse me?” Gomah asked.

“I don’t care anymore, I had enough going down there, unless Oriel does something or King Yemma does something, Degesu is handling the affairs!” Azzy snaps.

“You dare defy my wishes?!” Gomah snaps.

“Screw your wishes, I am a one man team, and its all about me now.” Azzy heads back to his room, and felt awkward, the room he shared with Razzamoth had memories he now can’t stop thinking about, memories of a simpler time, memories where he didn’t have to feel hurt, shunned. Judged. All of it is gone, and just memories now. 

Before he can wallow in his self pity however, the sound of what seems to be Degesu himself comes in. “You look like crap.” He comments.

“Yeah, have you looked at yourself in the mirror?” Azzy snapped.

“Wow, who pissed in your cereal this morning?” Degesu scoffed. 

“No one, leave me be.” 

“I heard you snapped at King Gomah.” 

“Yeah so?”

Degesu shrugs. “You shouldn’t have done that.”

“Well I did.”

“It wasn’t a very smart thing to do, you know?”

“Not many of us around here are smart.” Azzy scoffs.

“Do you need help with your Right Eye?” Degesu asked. 

“I… I appreciate it.” 

Azzy felt Degesu clean around his eye and apply a Core Person eyepatch on it. “There, don’t worry. You look fine now.” 

“Thanks…”

<Last Chapter >Next Chapter

A03 | WATTPAD | FF.NET | QUOTEV

If you want to be tagged in updates for this fic, please let me know.

[ghostly-penumbra]

Seven Ways to Summon the Ghost King

Chapter Seven: Family Call

[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [here]

Ao3

Summary: How can you say no to such a pressing call?

... no, really, Danny would love to know.

Notes: There are big spoilers for The Sandman comics. And I mean HUGE. As in, the culmination of the comic HUGE. Ye be warned!

- - -

“Brother, I stand in my gallery and hold your sigil. Please come through.”

“I am –ha!– in the middle of something right now.”

The being dressed all in white blinked, unimpressed, “I am worried about your safety, please come through.”

“Just… need… to kill them all…”

Dream of the Endless, no longer known as Daniel Hall, sighed in exasperation.

“Twin brother I am in my gallery holding your sigil, and I summon you.”

“Don’t you- stop that! Shit! You, kid, if you win this match in my name, I’ll make ya my apprentice!”

There was a fervid screech, and finally, his brother passed through where his portal portrait was.

Death of the Endless, pretty much still Daniel James Fenton, was spat out of his portrait and landed headfirst on the floor of the Dream Lord’s gallery.

“Hello there, twinsie dearest.” Danny deadpanned, crossing his arms as he glared up at his twin brother.

It was a curious thing, their twinship. Daniel Hall and Daniel James Fenton had both been born the 3rd of April of 1990, effectively making them the same age, but Daniel Hall had been in the womb for almost two years, making him technically older in existence, and Danny Fenton had been born premature.

Now, Death had already been there when Dream had first come to exist, because everyone had the potential to die long before they could even dream for the first time, so that Death had been Dream’s senior. But, this was a different Dream and a different Death, and the current Dream had taken his position in 1993, whilst the current Death had done so in 2023, giving this Dream work seniority.

Then again, this Dream had been a toddler when the position was given to him, and this Death had already been thirty-three, a whole adult by that point.

In the end there were too many factors to tell who was older than whom but since Desire and Despair had chosen to be twins, why couldn’t they?

“Hello, little brother.” Dream smiled down at him.

Knowing they wouldn’t reach a definite conclusion didn’t stop them from bantering over who was the older brother, however.

“I saw you had been summoned to the Waking world and through the eyes of one of your invokers, noticed you were nonplussed. I’m worried, brother.”

Ah, yeah, he might have knocked a kid out cold with his presence. It happened. And- she got better!

“That was two hours ago, baby bro. Having trouble measuring time in the Living world again?” He teased even as he held up a hand to be helped up.

“Au contraire, Death. I know just fine how long it’s been but I also know you can take care of yourself amongst a crowd of teenagers, powered or not. Alas, you took your time, and I grew restless.”

Dream lifted his brother up and got a snort and a friendly shoulder shove as a reward.

- - -

The brothers stood next to each other on Dream’s balcony, overlooking his Kingdom. Well, Dream stood, whilst Death sat on the railing, with his feet hanging down, back in his human living form as a 33 years old adult.

(He was already dead long before he became Death, so there was no need to kill him a second time. The fact that he was alive and could choose to be so whenever he wanted was of no consequence. It was more likely one of the reasons he had been a perfect pick for it.)

Danny broke the silence, “They couldn’t have done anything to me, even if they had tried. You know that.” He threw a pebble at the far-off lake and saw it skip endlessly.

Dream didn’t look at him. He didn’t need to have his predecessor’s memories of his entrapment to know what it had done to him. Even after the incident with the Dream Vortex, he had been proud and unyielding. Arrogant.

A human lifetime of imprisonment later, and as soon as he was free, he started planning his demise.

“Poorly done?” He asked instead.

“No, not at all,” Was his twin’s answer, “The circle was perfect, so was the chanting, and if there weren’t any trapping mechanism that was there on purpose. This one kid had a journal, the one who had the idea to summon the concept of Death to their dorm, filled with the knowledge we took with us when we left.”

He wasn’t talking about Dream, because Dream still walked the Waking world and interacted with humans in a more regular basis than his predecessor. It had been Death who, tired and grieving, had chosen to step away from the living, and only show himself to collect them and guide them to their next step; and as the King of Ghosts, he had taken all ghosts, spirits and shades with him, freeing them if they were trapped, helping them move on if they were still hesitant, and forcibly dragging them if they refused to stop wreaking havoc.

And he hadn’t been the only one; Heaven had finally stopped it’s wayward angels from going to Earth and, as Death would put it, “fucking shit up”, and the souls that resided there could no longer be summoned either.

Same thing with Hell; the gates had been closed so that the damned could only enter, not leave. There were no more demons making deals and messing with humanity anymore.

“That shouldn’t be possible. You made sure to kill all that knowledge in the Waking world.

Death sent a glare to his brother. He had not ‘killed the knowledge’, he had just taken it to his castle in the Ghost Zone, where only the dead resided. Shut up.

“And they won’t see it in their dreams, either.” He chose to say.

“Never.” his brother reassured quickly. The Dreaming would not inspire anyone in ways that could harm any of his siblings.

“Yeah, I thought as much,” Death huffed with a smile, “There was a…” He continued, knowing better than to use the word ‘thing’ when referring to someone that could think and feel. “… a being attached to this kid’s soul. It- he is something neither Didi nor I had ever seen.”

He let his words remain in the space between them, and knew his twin was seeing them written out in the air in front of him. (Much likely in comic sans, the asshole.)

“Not in a physical shape, at least.”

His brother said nothing, and only watched him reach revelation on his own even if it still was in his realm. He could be an ass patient like that.

Danny thought about it, looking for the words to explain his mind to the collective subconscious of the multiverse.

“That being is a bridge, for knowledge on us, not just us Endless, but many non-mortals, on our realms, how to call us, how to find us, how to appease us… how to trap us.”

This time he did see the words hanging between them –and it was comic-fucking-sans–, a bright toxic green that read trap. He put a hand on Dream’s shoulder, squeezing reassuringly.

“He didn’t put the trapping sigils, and they wouldn’t have stopped me in this form.” Even after becoming an Endless, that little trick of his didn’t stop working. Things meant to contain the dead had no power on him when he chose to be alive, and vice-versa. He could get his siblings out, too, should they need it.

He wouldn’t sit idly whilst he knew he could help. He could protect.

And, if anyone tried to go and tell him of rules and limitations, he could kindly point them to his Obsession and how it predated his duty as an Endless, how it had been part of him for almost a decade, and how the change in his nature had not managed to override it from him, no matter how much it tried.

Not wanting to continue with that topic, Dream said instead, “Did you have fun? Annoying or not, it’s been a while since you spoke with someone your age who still had a heartbeat.”

On cue, rings of light swept Danny up and down, turning him back to his ghost form, looking fourteen years old, right before his growth spur, with baby fat still on his cheeks and, if he lowered his guard long enough, sometimes he still moved like that hunched, awkward teen still discovering who he was.

“It was cool, actually! Most ‘these kids were nice, and they had  a bunch of cool video games; is not like any of them were a real challenge, but new competence is always welcome. Their universe didn’t have DOOMED, though, even if they are three centuries after the game was invented, but I fixed that, so I think they’ll be okay.” He said, knowing damn well he would be going back soon as the war started, to collect several of the people they loved and admired. “I may have won at DDR, but that girl sure got the Spirit Award.” He turned a mischievous smirk at his brother and found him grimacing and holding back a sigh, which only got Danny to laugh out loud at him, his smile so wide his eyes were half-closed in joy.

- - -

“Things are changing.” Danny said as they stared at the night sky, this time from the Waking, Living world where they had been born, four thousand and fourteen years ago.

“They always do.” Dream was a prime example of that.

“You know I fuckin’ hate chess analogies-” And he did, so much that the last time he had touched a chess board had been to throw it at Vlad’s annoying face. “-but… ugh, the pieces are being set, something’s gonna make a move, and we’ll have to face this new… board.” Danny scrunched up his nose in distaste. Fucking analogies. “And we need to move, too,” he continued nonetheless, “we gotta be ready, ‘cause if what’s coming next is what I think…” He didn’t finish his sentence, because he genuinely didn’t know how it’d all turn out. People would die, but they always did, as for the rest…

“Brother, please speak plainly.”

But Death couldn’t, he didn’t dare voice his concern here in the presence of both Father Time and Mother Night and speak it into reality. He wouldn’t fuck it all up again, when it was the ones he loved whom suffered the consequences. It had always been that way.

So he chose his words carefully.

“… the mascaraed will fall, there is now a bridge between what we tried to hide, and them. I don’t doubt there are others across the multiverse-” connected, drawing the others to themselves, “-it’s just that-” I haven’t been there, I haven’t paid attention, I stopped protecting them, “I didn’t notice before.”

“And when the game board is changed,” Dream continued in his brother’s stead, knowing how his thoughts spiralled, “if we don’t adapt to the new rules-”

“We adapt.”

Dream blinked, and turned to fully look at his twin brother.

Even still in his ghostly, Endless form his eyes were their icy blue, and they didn’t have that bright ethereal shine of their own, but instead reflected the street lamp next to their bench, the full moon above them, the stars in their mother’s body and the stars on Dream’s own eyes. Danny’s blue eyes shone with the world around them, alive.

There was no question in those eyes, no hesitation. This was something he was willing to speak into fact, into truth, unshakable.

They would adapt, because the other option was the end, everything and everyone leaving, everywhere. Danny locking the door with key and-

Being left behind, alone and Endless, please don’t, I don’t wanna, don’t make me-

“We adapt.” His brother echoed, his eyes human and green, a sign of affection, an oath of support, with their parents and anyone that cared to see as witness.

Danny breathed in again, not needing but wanting to, and rested his forehead on his twin’s shoulder.

“We got preparations to make. I may have already started. Let’s go, bro.”

Under their Father’s watchful gaze, two Daniels stood and left the quiet park of Amity and prepared for the future.

FIN

- - -

And so ends my first multi-chaptered fic written outside an event! Thank y'all for being with me these days and for all your lovely comments I haven't gotten around to replying!

Whatever they are, I would love to read your thoughts on this, because it was this chapter I wanted to write all along. There is a heartbreaking lack of Danny Phantom/The Sandman crossovers, and I feel it.

Real life is awful right now, so I don't think I'll get to write more of this concept, of Danny being Death of the Endless, but do feel free to come yell at me in my ask box anytime!

Also, a sidenote I can finally say: Something funny I'm noticing in the DPxDC area is that people are giving Danny the "all souls will be mine in the end" role as part of being the King of the Infinite Realms, and I'm like "uh, no, that's Death's bit, a canonical DC character. you guys are trying to make Danny Death" WHICH IS WHAT I JUST DID LMFAO

Anyway, thanks for reading ❤️

[celebrimbor-apologist]

Rings of Power Liveblog 2x06

Spoilers you guys

I’m not ready you guys fucking hell

At least the promo picture is not Tyelpe losing it this time haha

Okay let’s go. Im scared. 

Hey at least we are still at rating 12 years hahahaha

Why do I always watch the recap I already know what happened but…

I just realised that Durin doesn’t even doubt Celebrimbor, just Annatar. And Tyelpe’s face. Oh my dearest silverfist I want to kidnap you from Eregion. PleASE. Gotta re-read that fanfic my friend wrote after this 

Hey Arondir is running that’s okay, for a second I was worried they made Elrond run EVEN MORE. I love Arondir in action. I love Arondir. I don’t care much about the southlands sadly but I do care Arondir. 

Oh. MAP. Wait. 

OH TOWER.

Monologue <3

Oh Tyelpe no. HOLY CRAP. WHAT. Ohohohoh 

OH FUCK FUCK NO. 

HE IS NEVER MEAN TO--

HE FORGOT HER NAME HE FORGOT MIRDANIA’S NAME IM NOT OKAY IM NOT OKAY IM NOT OKAY NONONONONONoo 

whatdoyoumean he can Shout stop it stop it

oh he remembers when HE comes in 

oh no i hate this i hate this please please stop. 

OH. NO. 

ANNATAR. NO. GO AWAY. 

“I am well” No you are not. The fucking ring theme coming in. 

Oh no. Oh NO. I just skipped back ten seconds and he- the shards and the mess is all gone. Annatar what have you done please please please

ANNATAR YOU FUCKING BASTARD DIE IN A HOLE TYELPE SAID NO SUCH THING 

And now Celebrimbor is alone in the forge and everyone else thinks it’s good. 

“and pray” BITCH. “pray that he finishes his work before it finishes him” I am unwell I am unwell I am unwell.

Oh Mirdania 

OH FUCK OFF SAURON LEAVE HER BE. 

Mirdania I love you. Run away. Take Tyelpe. 

Yes Annatar, gather your skirties and walk up the stairs 

Omg the smile. 

Ah, yes, Galadriel and Adae at dinner. Must be nice. 

Oh Adar you GET it. 

He promised you what. Adar. Uh. Yeah moving on-

OH THE CROWN

Morgoth’s Crown 

omg this dramatic bitch. He wears what could kill him, huh? 

omg Adar KNOWS it. Is he kneeling??? “the fate of that city now rests on your ability to put aside your pride” and he already has. He already put it aside. And kneels. Fuck 

Oh Sam Hazeldine you GENIUS 

NÚMENOR 

Pharazon die in a fckign ditch and take Sa-

ELENDIL ELENDIL NOOOO 

Fucking Kevin with his arm in a sling. 

“I do” 

“I do not” 

Oh Elendil i love you you insane- Oh I love him. 

Oh, Pharazon is pissed at his son huh 

Eärien listen girlie i didn’t much care for you and then I understood your grief and how alone you felt but you could really, really back out now. Please? 

Oh hi Stranger. 

TOM TO THE RESCUE

Oh hi Nori! Harfoots travel every month? 

Gundabale I love you. 

Oh Nori, still looking for that destiny 

Merimac and Poppy huh? That was a fast burn, but I am not mad about it. She’s been lonely enough. 

“I say we fight for it” Oh I love him 

TOM (yes, this will forever be my reaction) 

ASDFGHJKL Tom is like “Let him find his stick in that mess”

“you must choose” I am Unwell. 

Gandalf having to choose between his friend and his destiny? I…AnD TOM IS GONE HAHAHAHA

Khazad Dum Theme my lovely 

Wait, it sounds different, it sounds… less. 

Is that just what they do now? Make gold treasure? I see now why people say the Arkenstone was a silmaril. Mithril is the light of a silmaril, isn’t it? 

OH FUCK. 

ANNATAR FUCK OFF

Timber, huh? 

“precious” huh 

Annatar getting rejected and not liking it meanwhile Sideeye by Durin. I love it. This is a man who has never been told no. 

King Durin losing it to Greed. 

“You belong to it” Oh Durin you have such a good heart I can barely cope. HOLY SHIT 

Durin are you okay?? No I don’t think so. 

Disa the amount of love I have for you? 

Durin crying <3 Oh love. 

Oh sea trial here we go. Funky horns. 

Eärien hellooo girl you are teenage rebellion gone too far but I love you. I get both sides and they are both breaking my heart. she is getting manipulated left and right and- 

Míriel???? MÌRIEL??? 

MÌRIELLLLL I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I MISSED YOU MY LOVE I MISSED YOU 

Eärien you are forgiven now get another dad hug. 

“What of my heart” OW

“What if it isn’t”. DOUBLE OW

“the sea is always right” 

Oh my heart. My heart is breaking apart to shatters. Oh my loves

DISA HI MY QUEEN

Narvi just try moving her if you want to lose, uh- 

SHE IS JUST SCREAMING AT THEM. 

OMG DISAAAAAAAA  

I AM CELEBRATING IN MY SEATTTTTT

“I LOVE YOU”

“Love me later.” 

THEMMMMMM 

Númenor is so beautiful

Oh the theme in the background. The theme. 

Omg they devised a plan huh??? 

Namarie. Namarie. They said Namarie. Bury me now. 

Oh I’m so not fine. He is crying. Nononono. I am sobbing please Ulmo, please-

Míriellllll

I am rooting for her 

QUEEN OF THE SEA 

QUEEN OF THE SEA 

Pharazon has Palantir+ Huh

Galadriel scheming I love you 

ELROND MENTION (I miss him) 

My ring huh 

“What then for the Uruk” yeah he SEES it. 

HOOOO BOY 

HOOOOOOOOOOOOO BOYYYYYYYY 

Yeah, Adar is going to die. 

Galadriel tastes some of Elrond’s medicine now, huh? 

THE SIEGE BEGINS HUH 

And they all see it. 

Malendol is the commander’s name, huh? You are now officially adopted. There’s this elf named Vorohil who I’d like to introduce you to. 

And he just watches. Annatar just watches. 

Art therapy Celebrimbor <3

And he can’t leave the forge huh 

what 

YES GET HIS ASS TYELPE

when I tell you I screamed

AGAINST THE WALL 

The quote it is the quote the quote

nononono

Oh no. 

OH DEAR No

I can’t

So this is the scene

Ow ow ow ow ow 

Am I weeping? Well let me tell you I’m not revelling in this diner tonight

all is fine outside and this hurts 

I cannot forge more rings 

be at ease 

no do not be at ease. 

The ring song theme. 

I give up 

“precious” 

THE FUCKING HAMMER 

I KNEW IT WOULD BE THE SCENE BEST FEANOR NONONONONONONNNKKJNKJN GUDIjlwneköjbvühfbi

One last time. 

Oh I hate this I hate this I hate this please please please.

I knew it. And he is just walking around there. 

The siege begins. 

find me in the garden where I shall be buried because I am dead 

I screamed less than last episode I feel

Fuck I knew this was gonna happen but I love Eregion so much 

I miss Elrond. 

[ceoofhelaegon]

I don't know how unpopular/popular this opinion is but honestly

Book!Aegon>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Show!Aegon and it's not even close

Book!Helaena>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Show!Helaena

The Genius writers thought they did something with her character when they just add dragonsdreams in her character and thought that was enough while at the same time, they have taken away her son Maelor (it would suck so bad if they made b&c about Jaehaerys and jaehaera) , they took her bond with dreamfyre as well, book!Helaena has a very strong bond with her dragon and she loved flying, they have took the people's love for her. How can it be believable now if the smallfolk rose against Rhaenyra because of Helaena's death? If they ever adapted that part anyways. And don't let me start about Aegon, i am still and i will always be bitter about his characterization in the show. They have took a grey, complex and flawed character from the book then turned him into the antichrist in the show lmao. They thought rape wasn't enough so they add the part of him watching his bastards children kill eachother for shits and giggles when it's canon that the only thing that made Aegon so cruel and ruthless is the death of his son Jaehaerys. They literally made him much worse that what Mushroom has ever claimed about him and then start gaslighting us that they made him a sympathetic and grey character 😍

Nonnie, you’re a person after my own heart.

I do think that Helaena was also a dreamer in the books, I mean GRRM didn’t give her Dreamfyre for no reason.

B&C being between Jaehaerys and Jaehaera is honestly so dumb, it clearly says “a son for a son” so it will always be obvious that Jaehaerys will die, they’ll be no suspense…but the writers already butchered so much, what’s one more thing?

Helaena is crowned by her mother, and becomes Queen WITH Aegon but only one woman is allowed to becoming Queen in the show.

Helaena should be WAY more than her dreams, she’s a great mother and yet she hasn’t spent any time with her children. She helps Alicent with the peace terms, convinced Aegon to send them yet she only talks in prophetic words. Just when it comes to the toast (it was funny but it doesn’t scream loyalty from the greens to each other).

Aegon being a bully to his brother, with the Strong kids?!

Also, we can’t forget the main criminal offence that was not having Aegon defend Helaena and being angry at Jace trying to dance with her, the dancing never happened in the books, god, I hate it here.

Aegon saying that he will sail away to never being found, was straight up character assassination and I’m tired to pretend it wasn’t. When the ONLY reason he accepted becoming a King was to protect his FAMILY?! His children, his wife? His mother and brothers? Fuck the writers, ngl.

Alicent not crowning Helaena was absolutely disgusting, the Kingmaker Ser Criston Coke made the King and Alicent, the Queenmaker, made the Queen. (my Alicole agenda is showing 😭)

Some fellow greenies are way too comfortable saying that in the show, Aegon abuses Heleana like it’s a sport, I get not liking Aegon in the show but saying this as if they saw it happen? When Heleana is more than comfortable making fun of him? When Helaena doesn’t care about Aegon being near her? Yeah, no.

They also love to say, this isn’t the books, okay? Doesn’t stop the fact that I want a better character, I want a better Aegon, he’s the man of the house in the books, and in the show he’s pathetic. TGC deserves better.

But yeah, hopefully season 2 will be better even tho the damage is done.

[charizardstolemynickname]

Season 3 episode 2 reaction babyyyy!! Part 1 (i hope of 2)

I will just go straight into this, AH

NO ARE WE STARTING WITH THIS SCENE!? FUCK YOU, I CAN'T HOLD BACK TEARS FROM KING'S FINAL WORDS ANYMORE

Lilith using hooty as a form of jetpack is making me laugh, I am sorry. BUT LILITH I AM SO GLAD YOU ARE OKAY, I love you dearly YOU TOO HOOTY. God what a way to start the episode. I assume it will be the counter pov to the Human Realm. So I think it will be Eda, King, Collector, Lilith and Hooty pov? OO that's fun! And it will have ep3 as the final, both sides reunited?

HOOTY NO! LILITH! COLLECTOR KIDDO, NOT COOL, DON'T DO THAT, GODDDDDD WHERE DID YOU PUT THEM!?

RAINE IS ALIVE! Hallelujah! I was getting worried they would die because they used their last bit of energy saving Eda, BUT EDA AND RAINE LIVE ON!

HARPY EDA IS BACK LADIES, GENTLEMEN AND OTHER GUESTS! SHE IS BACK AND RAINE IS SMITTEN!

God no, the curse, shit, well nobody thinks to plan emergency potions when the world IS LITERALLY BEING RIPPED APART, fair enough

Oh woah, Luz is in this episode, huh, well that's funky! Well there goes my idea, but damn, I am excited. MAYBE TIME WORKS DIFFERENTLY IN DIFFERENT REALMS, oo

"This Mama is hungry for vengeance!" "Now THAT is a fight I'd watch" took the words out of my mouth Gus, HELL YEAH, GO KICK BELOS' BUTT CAMILA

.....Okay, LISTEN, "The collector is evil blah blah" YEAH, well, maybe not, BUT THEY HAVE DONE BAD ACTIONS... However this version of bonesborough looks cool! Well, not cool, maybe nostalgic? Reminds me of children's lullabies, SO I LIKE IT!

Turning people into dolls tho, that's bad

Belos! Always lovely to see your.... slimey, gross, figure! But lets not kill innocent butterflies, alright pal? And damn, you get hallucinations of your brother? Also this feels like common sense BUT DON'T CLONE YOUR BROTHER WHO YOU MIGHT HAVE KILLED?! LIKE THAT DAGGER LOOKS VERY LIKE YOU KILLED HIM WITH IT PHILIP!

My guy starts melting and says "I need a new body", like just deal with it, humans only get 1 body, stop getting several! Leave some for the rest of us. damn.

Camila, Gus and Willow just having a conversation trying to find the best way to support Luz awakened something inside of me, especially the "He wasn't disappointed in me, but I didn't want to fail him" LIKE DAMN, WHO IS SPYING ON MY LIFE TO MAKE THIS TOO DAMN RELATABLE

"Don't worry about me, like Gus said, I'm the reliable one" 1) AGAIN, WHO IS SPYING ON ME and 2) I have heard that one before Willow AND I KNOW YOU ARE 1 MORE "Are you okay?" AWAY FROM SOBBING, its okay Willow bestie, you can cry too

I hope we find out what Luz's Palisman hatches too soon, I am wayyyyyyyy too impatient for this, I AM DESPERATE

THEY GOT MATCHING JUMPERS AND HOOTY GOT A MATCHING BOWTIE?! FUCKKKKKK, nobody touch me, I am sensitive right now, GOD this found family is so important to me!!

"I will find Eda and King, no matter how long it takes" "ITS EDA AND KING" fucking hell Hunter way to ruin the adventure (/j) (Yes I did start laughing when Hunter said that)

..........Okay, erm. Well. Collector. I see what you have done. And, I question your methods! As this feels like, idk, maybe a tad illegal and morally wrong? Idk though might be wrong, but turning people into dolls is erm.. less quirky and more, wrong.

......................Okay. Right. I DON'T THINK MASS CONTROLLING EVERYONE TO PLAY PRETEND WHILST YOU BE A HERO IS VERY MORALLY GOOD EITHER! Listen, I get the urge to play hero and so and so, I did that as a kid! WITH DOLLS! WHO WERE ALWAYS, DOLLS! NOT HUMANS! God, you truly are a kid, you would be like, 5 in the human realm. WHERE IS YOUR MUM!?! DAD?! PARENTS?!

Fucking Plant Lady Coven head having to play Eda and (seems to be) the only one not controlled by the Collector and not be a doll, is fucking hilarious, 10/10

"Eda has a more, cool-aunt vibe, who pretends to be all cold-hearted but actually cares a lot" SEE, THANK YOU COLLECTOR, THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN SAYING SINCE DAY 1

Oh! Well. Most directors when they don't like the actors just fire them, but you do you Collector!

CAMILA ALSO JUST LOOKING AT KING AND LOVING HIM IS SO REAL, I adore him too Camila, don't you worry

WOAH ALL THE STUDENTS ARE OKAY?! Damn. That's one good school. Well, apart from the 2 that didn't. And all the staff went. BUT STILL, poor kids though. THEY ARE JUST KIDS. Also damn, we start to like Bump and that poor guy hasn't had a break since

...I don't even want to talk about that "man-tholomule" joke

THE BUMP STATUE IS THE GREATEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN, 10/10 Bump and Eda would approve, "Princy Bump"

ED MY PAL, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU, "not empty! There were rocks at the bottom!" God I missed you Ed

Talk about being haunted by your past, damn Belos, you've killed a lot of people bro, oh and "Oh shut up!" IS NOT A GOOD RESPONCE TO SEEING THE GHOSTS OF WHO YOU HAVE KILLED. it is funny tho.

AMITY'S MUM!? WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE. God, you really have 0 morals huh. YOU ARE ACTING AS THE COLLECTOR'S MUM!?! Listen I know your kids hate you BUT YOU DIDN'T NEED TO REPLACE THEM WITH A BEING WHO IS TRYING TO DESTROY ALL WITCHES IN A WEIRD WAY!

"Clean the planet and scorch the air" Well that might be useful later!

I will ignore ALL of the corruption happening at Hexside right now BUT HOOTY! AND RAINE! AND EDA! AND DARIUS! AND- Yeah I'll stop now BUT YEAH

EDA THANK GOD YOU AREN'T A WEIRD DOLL, and sweetie, I get wanting to visit your partner BUT YOU'VE GOTTA STAY SAFE! All the coven heads (except plant lady) Being weird security now? Kinda cool! Confusing, but cool!

WOAH LILITH! WHAT HAPPENED TO BEING A DOLL?!... And no longer being ginger, and having long hair? I am very confused BUT HAPPY YOU AREN'T A DOLL!

....Okay I know they are probably comedic relief BUT LILITH AND HOOTY'S FRIENDSHIP IS REALLY IMPORTANT TO ME OKAY!

"With her real family" HUSH EDA, YOU ARE APART OF THAT REAL FAMILY

"You are actually a great leader" "Did you have ever have any doubt in your mind?" "Yes. Many many doubts" fucking mood Gus, you always get the greatest lines. I am stealing this

WOAH BELOS MY PAL, I get that your "grow your own clone" guy wasn't ready yet, BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU STEAL RAINE'S BODY YOU PRICK

.....Don't say that about Flapjack HE IS STILL ALIVE, HE WILL MAKE IT.... RIGHT?!

I knew you were 1 step away from a breakdown Willow, I have been on that path don't you worry

AND I JUST REALISED I WENT OVER HALF THE EPISODE AND THIS IS A REALLY LONG POST SO, part 2 in like, half an hour

[lerios]

tagged by all time icon @baynton 💕 this has been in my drafts for like a month because i wanted to answer it after i properly started succession but now i get the feeling its gonna take a while to get a proper grip of that show lmao😅

List 5 favourite shows (in no particular order) and answer questions accordingly.

1. bbc quacks

2. firefly (my absolute beloved 😍)

3. its always sunny in philidelphia

4. bbc ghosts

5. fuck it, critical role (i don't watch much TV lol)

1. Who is your favourite character in 2?

Favourite? probably Wash my gorgeous comedy boy with an icon wife i spent years simping over, BUT i don't think we can ignore how fucking fixated i was on Simon. like, he was gender envy before i knew that Gender™ was a thing.

2. Who is your least favourite character in 1?

i lowkey highkey want to throw hands with Robert. how dare you marry a girlboss and then not appreciate her wtf. give me her number

3. What’s your favourite episode of 4?

the Thomas Thorne Affair popped off. like yeah sure my skrunkly is centre stage but also the episode is just really well done.

4. What is your favourite season of 5?

I AM A SEASON 1 TRUTHER. vox machina i miss you so much 😭

5. What’s your favourite relationship in 3?

charlie mac brotp.

6. Who is your anti relationship in 2?

jayne/river shippers are wild, she's like 12 and they don't even get along (also jayne/simon is the real OTP)

7. How long have you watched 1?

well i first posted about it in march, so like 5 months probably

8. How did you become interested in 3?

my mate jon said there was a musical episode so i watched like 10 seasons of it lol.

9. Who is your favourite actor in 4?

okay i don't really know anything about any of them, but ben seems like a vibe. i too write mostly depressing shit and don't talk to anyone about anything 🥰

10. Which show do you prefer 1, 2 or 5?

firefly

11. Which show have you seen more episodes of 1 or 3?

3 because theres 16 seasons of always sunny and only 1 season of quacks 😭😭😭

12. If you could be anyone from 4, who would you be?

my man mike is alive and has a magical badass wife that can talk to ghosts.

13. How would you kill off your favourite character in 5?

my man Percival Fredrickstein von Musel Klossowski de Rolo the third can never die, fuck off. (i'd kill him in a suitably emo way probably. he dies alone and still demon-infested, having scared the rest of vox machina away from caring about him once and for all, then probably getting converted into a vampire).

14. Would a ¾ crossover work?

asdagjsdag YES the gang would make such a big deal of having ghosts, they'd probably try to make money off of julian somehow. robin and charlie would be 100% best friends. the captain would be having a breakdown at thier impropriety 24/7 but fanny would get along with them way better than she'd expect lol

15. Pair two characters in 1 that would make an unlikely, but strangely okay couple.

okay theres not many characters in quacks but i would love to see john/william. john absolutely needs to drug him 🥰

16. Overall, which show has the better cast, 3 or 5?

probably 5 because i got Parasocial about them for a while. pro-lgbt kings.

and i’m tagging: fucking nobody because i don't have the braincells to do social shit rn but i wanted do this when i found it again bc it looked fun

[enchi-elm]

Apfelessig rewatches Turn S01E01: Pilot, second half

30:21 It's the little details, like all these women doing laundry and wearing proper headwear.

30:36 ...Can I just point out that the first person to ask Anna if she's alright is Captain Simcoe. Like she's beating the crap out of a jacket with a wooden paddle, no, she's not, but it's nice you care?

31:19 "Your husband has been shipped off to prison--" Zero points for tact, Simcoe.

31:40 Simcoe, you're such a dick. I think--honestly, I think it's a bit overdone to have the whole "establish him as a villain by making him appear predatory to women, or at least, one specific woman" thing, in fact, TV producers, I'm wholly sick of it. There are so many more interesting ways to make someone a baddie. Simcoe's a menace in so many other ways.

33:12 I can't believe people just paddled into the Sound in a rowboat. It's the freaking Sound.

33:24 ...and then Abe even falls asleep in his rowboat. In the Sound. At night.

33:56 Wild to me that Continental Congress can arrest people. Like, I get it, at this point it's a...what would be a good word, alternative government? Or, like, a military occupation? Militia government? Brain's fried. It's just funny, like, "we're setting up our own Justice system and included in the list of possible charges is illegal trade", like, oh good, I'm glad that was a priority when you were planning to denounce your relations to the British King. (edit: Okay, actually, that does make sense, if it's about not passing on resources to the enemy.)

Also, like, I have a lot feelings about Ben XD like, I love him, I relate to his characterization a lot, and obviously I am a die-hard Tallster shipper, but he did very much waterboard his childhood friend. Like, that is a thing he decided was a good way to coerce his friend to work for him.

34:51 I mean okay, it's not clear that Ben ordered them specifically to waterboard him, but like, he did set up his imprisonment. He's not, like, immensely concerned with Abe's well-being after either.

35:37 Even Abe doesn't trust him XD Ben is straight-up stone cold in this episode

36:18 I love this scene, everyone's so sneaky

37:07 This is the legal definition of entrapment, isn't it?

38:30 "And the 12 pounds." Abe figures it out so quickly that they set him up. (edit: HA!)

39:03 Oh Abe. Of all the smart, STUPID STUPID things you could have done to cover up the fact that you got arrested for smuggling, coming back to town with a fake/self-inflicted wound when there's a murder inquiry on is number 1 on the list.

40:27 "Captain Joyce is dead?" If you look at his face, you can see his life flashing before his eyes as three people who consider him a prime suspect wait for him to catch up.

42:18 "I've never killed anyone." "I have. Plenty just like you." Oh, Samuel Roukin. I would like to buy you a beer some time.

42:25 "Travel safe!" XD Also, Simcoe just like bodily throws Abe to the growd like he weighs---

42:47 ANNA AND CALEB, YES!!

43:01 Anna, probably: My husband has been arrested, there is a threatening British captain living in my house, I manage my estate alone, and now there's someone signalling me from my barn. I think I'll go investigate this dark building alone because I don't feel vulnerable enough.

43:19 Oh. Not Caleb, not yet.

43:30 Oh yeah, Simcoe's Welsh.

44:25 "Caleb? You saw him! How is he?" Keeping Strongbrew alive in the year of our lord 2023 <3 @ladytp @lucyemers

44:27 "Unshaven. He's insane." Ahhh, the words that sparked a mythology. <3

44:35 "Ben? They were together?" ....You know I don't think I've seen a fic where Anna is the jealous one. That could be interesting. I have a modern AU WIP where Ben finds out about Anna and Caleb having a fling and he's the one who gets jealous (though he's not clear who he's jealous of).

45:04 "What more are you waiting for?" Listen, if Anna and Mary were the main characters of this Culper Ring, the war would have ended years sooner, just saying.

46:29 "Anarchy." "You mean self-rule." "I mean chaos masquerading as freedom."

47:00 Judge Woodhull: Abe can you maybe just make it a bit easier for me to keep you alive and out of prison and your family sheltered and fed

47:27 LOL HEWLETT: Good of you to want to pay the fine for smuggling but honestly you're probably too broke so I guess you're going to prison. *turns to Abe's dad, also at the dinner table* Sorry, can't play favourites Abe's Dad: OR OR OR HANG ON OR WE CAN COME UP WITH SOMETHING ELSE

48:09 Hewlett's just too good at his job. I love his characterization, he's such a liability to everyone's plans because he's fastidious, orderly, and well-mannered and wants to find reasonable solutions for everything.

48:59 Oh the Woodhull father-son drama. I totally tuned out on my first run-through whenever this came up, it just really wasn't my scene. I found Townsend's family relationships far more interesting.

49:04 Hewlett: ...and another reminder that I am really good at my job, if not knowing who to trust with my information, is that all your friends will unknowingly shortly be under attack by a homicidal maniac I barely keep under my command. Good night, all!

49:54 Who feeds all these soldiers? I've never heard of military records where a side was saying they were actually getting the properly rationed amount of food but I've seen plenty of records complaining about how well-fed the other side was.

50:49 I have no memory of this scene. Abe's first real act of espionage and I remember none of it. Can't even remember what he does with it.

52:46 Ohhh okay, so I guess Ben just gave Abe his entire Culper plan without knowing yet that Abe was actually going to go through with it. I thought Abe'd send a letter first or something being like "okay, I'll do it" but then how the heck would you get that to Ben. Just seems a bit risky, like, "Okay Abe, I've strong armed you but you don't seem convinced, anyway here's exactly how to reach me". ...I guess he didn't really have a choice

53:19 "Barrel. Over a barrel." It took me a while to learn what that meant. Simcoe playing such a creep.

54:40 Captain "No Need" Simcoe, lifts an entire barrel of cider by himself

55:17 Hey hey real quick you know what never got explored in enough detail? The slave ownership and indentured servants on display by the main characters. edit: "Yeah but Abigail--" ABIGAIL NEEDED TWICE AS MUCH SCREEN TIME AND A BETTER EXPLANATION OF WHERE SHE CAME FROM.

55:52 What, Abe, I thought you'd figured this out already? What was the "And the 12 pounds" about earlier then?

56:12 "You passed muster when you refused to give up my name." Abe, your childhood friends played you like the cheap kazoo you are. I would love to have seen that conversation with Ben and Caleb where they plan this, like, "Okay, we need to force Abe to play ball. Ooo, I know, let's set him up, arrest him, and see if he squeals on you." "Excellent idea. Shall we make him fear for his life?" "Oh, several times, why not?" "Why don't we just try to drown him after we first shoot at him?"

56:23 Should we keep a count going as to how many times Caleb gets punched in the face in this show? Because: 1

56:31 "I'm 2nd Company, 4th Battalion, New York Regiment. Alright?" Readers, do you have any idea how much I tried to find anything to confirm or explain that. I wholescale gave up, lampshaded and straight-up fabricated a backstory for Wind and Water, even before it became plot-relevant. I'm convinced no one understands or understood how the Continental Army worked in 1776. No one. "I'm assigned to special detail with Captain Tallmadge." Remind me, again, they never met, right? Do you know how hard it is to investigate the military record of a man who's backstory has been so foundationally altered? From the 1700s?

59:40 BATTLE COUPLE BATTLE COUPLE BATTLE COUPLE

1:00:53 Ben you salty man.

1:01:30 Hmmmmmyesssssss this Ben/Caleb interaction is so revealing as to their personalities. *chef's kiss*

1:01:43 I have seen this gif a million times, it's so weird to see it in its natural habitat.

1:02:09 Mary! <3 ...is she literally the only person to say anything kind to Abe in this entire episode?

1:03:45 Sprout <3

And that's the end of episode 1! Fun experience to see it again after so long. It's so much richer than I remember <3 Maybe I'll do a proper rewatch of the whole thing. It'd be nice to go back to something comforting.

[illuveterian-archives]

Tale of the Last Illuveterian - Part 5

As a way to distract myself I spent the next few years learning and training. I found a way to summon my family’s entire library into the pocket dimension so I spent time learning my species by species' recent history. I only went back about 8000 years and skimmed to the present from there. I just wanted to know the basics, since I had nobody to teach me otherwise. The library itself can filter through the books for you if you give it parameters to look for. There were answers to one particular question that I desperately needed. So I sat up straight at the table I was reading at and asked it, dreading whatever answer may come my way. “Why didn’t I die?” It came out quite and shaky. A scroll appeared on the table before me, the edges were frayed due to age but it was in otherwise good condition. The text itself was in such an old form of our language that I could barely decipher it. It was a direct account from one specific member of our species. We called him “Mairmoryu Ickmosh” which in english means “Death King”, nobody knew what his actual name was as he never included it in any of his entries. I didn’t know why he was called “Death King” until I read his account at 19. I was probably just too young at 5. Yeah, that’s reasonable. I did manage to update the language in a notepad as I went just in case I needed to ever reference it in the future. It took several days and gave me a headache just looking over it. Here’s roughly what was said, It’s not exact but it’s as close as it’ll ever be.

Something horrible has happened. Everyone is dead. I woke up this morning to find the world around me in burning ruins. Ash coats the sky and the air and if I happened to breathe I would surely be suffocating. Everything is on fire. How I remain unscathed I do not know. Of the 256 of us, I find nobody alive, and I count each of their clothes left in piles where they stood. Outside of our village I see little through the ash. What I can see is destroyed. Bodies of the giants we roamed with lay charred across smoldering fields. Few trees continue to stand where there were once many. Everything I cared so dearly for has been torn from me. I will follow their suit and reunite with them.

His first entry ended there and and and there were faded blue stains along the bottom. From that I gathered that his color was either Red or a blend of Blue and Yellow as Green, since green as its own color didn’t exist until roughly 7000 years ago. Our blood color is directly contradictory to our body color so it’s easier to tell when we’re injured. Sunni and I were both Blue and as twins, we each have one of the optional colors. Mine ended up being Red while hers was Yellow. Another scroll appeared on the table and the one in my hands vanished. Here is what his second entry said.

I have tried many ways. No matter what I try, this cruel world refuses to let me leave and join my loved ones. Every option has failed me. I even tried jumping directly into the river of heat which came from the tall mountain. I woke up in my own bed, partially covered in burn scars, but alive. That was my final attempt, my body now entirely riddled with scars. All I do now is sleep, any time I wake up I injure myself to fall back asleep. I yearn for nothing else but my dearest family. I hope they are at peace. But that is something I will never know of, I suppose.

That was the end of the second entry. The next one was quite a bit newer looking, meaning it was written hundreds of thousands of years later. This is confirmed within the entry itself.

I have not kept records as my ancestors have done, and for that I am ashamed. I have spent all of my time these last 500,000 years allowing myself to do nothing but sulk in my own misery. However, I have now come to the epiphany that I must continue on with my life, make what I can of eternity. If not for myself, then to honor those lost within the disaster, of and not of my kind. The world is still covered with ash, but not nearly as much, and it no longer glows a haunted red of fire. Trees have begun sprouting where they once stood magnificently and small beings not dissimilar to the giants of old have made their way to the fields, now green once more. I will begin keeping meticulous records of everything, as was done before. Though my personal writings will stay separate. Things are looking up and I intend to try and keep them that way.

And he did keep meticulous track of everything going on from that point forward. He wrote about the evolution of species, keeping eyes on the more notable ones. One in particular that caught his eye were these small primates, noted to look vaguely like us aside from commuting on mostly all fours and were covered in fur across the whole of their body. That particular line of evolution ended up leading directly to you humans, which I found out a few years later when I decided to go back and read some of his records. The name given for your species from ours is “Keertoh”, though I suppose that holds little significance. His next entry was then several millions of years later, an exact timeline was not given, but comparing them to his other work, it closest resembles the scrolls that are now roughly 4 million years old.

I have unfortunately neglected to continue my personal writings however I hope my tracking of everything else makes up for it. These new curious beings I’ve been watching continue to look more and more like Illuveteris every year. They now walk upright like us and carry very similar proportions. Their hair is also reduced to majorly just the tops of their heads and some to their faces. I wonder if it is something they have consciously done, to look like us? Perhaps only time shall tell. I have decided that the world is now right enough to bring in the next generation. I have one small child and plan on having more. She’s an absolute joy and the light of my life. The skies are blue and animals of all sorts roam. I share the joys of bonding with my child and will do my best to make sure she knows her roots, as will all my future children.

His next entry is within the same time-ish. It’s written about 1000-1500 years later. He was not as good at remembering to write down his personal life as he was the records he was keeping. Though, I suppose technically it wouldn’t be anybody’s business to know his goings on, so I can’t find a reason to be angry at him.

I have ended up with 25 wonderful children, each growing into themselves as young adults. I enjoy watching them grow and discover everything around them. And I look forward to seeing where they each choose to go in their lives.

The next entry is his last one. It’s fairly short, and the final one is from his eldest daughter. I'll put them together.

Written roughly 10,000 years after: All of my children have each had their own, and some of my grandchildren have as well. Overall between all 4 generations there are now 354 of us. I have 25 children, 243 grandchildren, and so far, 111 great grandchildren. I have begun to watch myself age again, no longer do I look as youthful as my children, but now I begin to show lines of age. I am no longer so sure of what the future holds, but I am incredibly proud of everything I have built thus far. And I look forward to seeing what new future I behold.

My father, the longest reigning king, has passed of old age. I, his eldest daughter, am taking his place, and will be continuing his work. At the time of passing, 23 of his 25 children remain alive, 238 of his 243 grandchildren live, and all 457 of his great grandchildren are alive, with an addition of currently 24 great great grandchildren. He will have a ceremony held this upcoming spring to signify his reuniting with his family at last in our afterlife amongst the stars. He will be greatly missed. 

The final entry then vanished from my hand, returning to its place among the seemingly infinite shelves. Where it sits exactly, I’m not entirely sure. I spent days reading those entries in their entirety. Come to find out, I technically could make it so I could die again, but to do that I’d have to bring the population back up to “stable”. Not only am I currently far too young for that, with the current state of the world it will absolutely not happen, even if I were to feel ready. To bring children into the world to suffer just so I can move on would be incredibly selfish of me. It is something I will not be doing until things change. Which is what I set myself on doing once I was done reading. I stood from the table and made my way to bed. Swearing to start first thing the next morning.

[britcision]

(Muahahaha this is going to be extra juicy)

Okay so Danny adopting Robin and immediately leaving him to just keep haunting the night and being a vigilante does immediately put him in literally the exact situation Bruce is in, but worse because he’s not just a ward

The argument isn’t “does the recent orphan think you’re his dad”, it’s “you’re not taking care of your kids”

(Because yeah, Dick that young? Recently watched his real parents die, pretty sure he was a ward because Dick violently protested adoption)

Another fun thing about Dick that young: Bruce didn’t want him to be a vigilante either

Dick was breaking out of anywhere he was put with murder in his heart and a frankly upsetting set of skills

So when this smartass “king of the dead” declares he can be a better dad, “adopts” Dick, and just… leaves him in an alley?

Well, back to the batcave and the next two weeks are all about researching Daniel Fenton and Danny Phantom from every angle

And for all Bruce is still smarting because he is goddamn trying to stop this terrifying little murderchild from chasing gang leaders bare handed… by the end of week 2 he’s a little hopeful

Because sure, Danny hasn’t actually done anything to stop Dick from running around kickflipping off buildings… but maybe he actually could

Superman can’t stop Dick Grayson from running around kickflipping off buildings

So Bruce sits down with indisputably the angriest and stabbiest of the Robins until Damian arrives with his own sword and kill list, and suggests that the next stage of the investigation should be Dick going to “investigate” Danny at his place (and see what exactly he thinks he’ll do better than Bruce)

Dick, feral mischief murdergoblin, agrees and makes his way to Danny’s the next day, claiming he had a fight with Bruce

Danny, who totally has been supervising Dick invisibly, makes him welcome, and they sit down to have a talk about why Dick wants to be a teen vigilante

Cuz sure, Danny was one too, he remembers what it was like! But he’s an adult now, and he reckons reassuring the murderbaby that he and Batman can handle everything will help Dick relax back into babyhood

He is not expecting Dick to demand the head of the man who killed his parents

Technically it’s easier than “end all crime in Gotham”, which is Bruce’s mission, buuuuuut murder is not the same as therapy

Danny calls Jazz to talk to the murderbaby

He also asks Dick not to go out Robin-ing that night

(Mostly planning to take Dick out on baby training run the next day if the kid really wants to keep being a vigilante until he can become a murderer)

Dick stares at him

Dick agrees

Dick waits 3 minutes after Danny turns his back and runs off to punch more bad guys because he craves violence

Cue the most stressful 6 weeks of Danny’s life trying to keep Dick alive while Dick is the least helpful possible to that goal

This kid is fully human but you’ve gotta convince him of that, he’s already more comfortable in free-fall than on the ground

Danny isn’t even actually trying to stop him from patrolling, he just wants to be sure Dick doesn’t do it alone but until he communicates that Dick is gonna keep sneaking off and even after he has, Dick is gonna run off alone to try and commit that murder cuuuuuz technically he and Bruce “broke up” so he doesn’t have to follow the bat code (according to Dick)

Danny and Bruce run into each other on the way into some supervillainous hide out to rescue the criminals from Dick and have the most awkward metaphorical elevator ride

Finally Danny sighs and shakes his head

Danny: Okay so I definitely underestimated this kid and I’m genuinely impressed you kept him alive

Bruce: hn *your apology is accepted and I am glad you see things my way*

Danny: living children are hard

Bruce: hn *you sound like my butlerdad*

Danny: oh word you’re Alfred’s boy? Neat, always wondered what happened to him

Anyway long story short Danny and Alfred get parent trapped by Dick and Ellie (they dated on some of Danny’s Adventures In Time and Danny stans a silver fox)

Bruce is mortally offended six weeks later when Danny cheerfully proclaims that he wins, since he has now successfully adopted Bruce

Bruce tries to adopt Ellie, who is immediately against it. She keeps throwing him off her trail and he keeps tracking her down. She's honestly concerned, and normally she would handle her problems by herself- but this is Batman.

So when Bruce gets a little too close and Ellie is just so tired... she calls for Danny.

"Mom!"

Cue college student, perpetually tired and overworked Danny "High King Phantom" Fenton appearing from the very shadows Batman normally does himself, seeing the situation and going off at this "clearly older man" chasing his daughter in the middle of the night.

Cue the most elaborate "stop trying to adopt my kid before I adopt yours" series of battles