#yeah thatd be embarrassing

[orcelito]

Several months late, the landlord finally picked up the dehumidifier from my kitchen

Would've been nice had I been told they were coming though 💀 so I could've cleaned up the grocery bags on the floor that I hadn't put away yet 💀💀💀💀💀

[juliusleafeon]

do people post edits on here 0_o

[urautismdiagnosis]

Pokes u

Do you have Barnacles Headcanons to share with his wife (aka me)

YES also sorry for the late response lol uhhh this is mostly just stuff from my au lol and its got different world building than the show does

Ok first off some context, in my au the reasons for PEOPLE species to have different traits is more based on environmental factors and conflicts between other groups of people. 👌

There are definitely some wild species that aren't even intelligent enough to have nearly any sapience (in simple terms its self awareness) that would probably end up being food or wtv, but like going based off of irl stuff polar bears mostly need high fat diets and unless there are a TON extra of high fat food fish thatd make the arctic pretty hard to survive

Unless ofc 👀 well they are PEOPLE people so u can convince me they'd have somehow domesticated either musk or (hoofed arctic animal) or bred some other kind of milk producing animal as a source of food

All I'm saying is that he could and would and has eaten an entire wheel of cheese before

And he absolutely has a secret stash of high fat snacks because I think he might be a liiiiittttle bit self conscious about it

Because he realized that arctic animals and non arctic animals have HUGE differences in social norms and apparently most animals don't have at least 3 inches of fat minimum on their entire body???

And its not cuz hes embarrassed of the fat, its normal and healthy, he just doesn't want to go from Trustworthy and Reliable Captain of thr Octonauts to "oh my god i need like an entire cheesecake rn to feel normal" in front of everyone cuz like 😭 he is a bit of a comfort eater. Like ah yes our strong and level headed captain is eating an entire box of oreos at 2 am because he misses his sister again 😭

Ofc the others do find out but there isn't any judgement if anything kwazii would probably join him, bro has a history of having weird food habits (hm wonder why... surely nothing related to being shipwrecked on an island and having to survive) and its nice

He does like, have THE best snacks tho and he might be hoarding them just a tiny bit-

he also can feel a bit worried about coming off as too large or intimidating so thats why he's always got his hands on his hips- and his head lowered down a bit

its not that he seems like physically scary but a larger presence can be intimidating for a lot of people

Teeth and claws aren't usually seen as intimidating in most scenarios in this world because its so common and is just like a feature of the species the same way hearing or smell can be btw

so yeah someone threatening to scratch ya can be scary but so can someone being able to find you because they can hear ur heartbeat 💀🙏

Back to the main point, like all the other octonauts aren't even like medium sized animals (like wolves and whatever), there ALL very small species. So hes like way in the upper range, the highest and tallest possible species while everyone else are all smaller ones specifically

So if barnacles is Actually Mad (💀 the scenario to make him genuinely mad has to be BAD) then he will go to his FULL HEIGHT

Cuz irl polar bears got very tall strong necks and etc so I think him standing at Full Serious Height would be very startling

Also about polar bears sense of smell!

Circling back to the adaptations being related to survival pressures and social ones

Polar bears in this world, use their sense of smell for something very important in the arctic: navigation, above and below water

It prevents things like getting lost in the wintery white world, which is so so easy for others. It can help find others than might be lost, and it can tell u if they r injured or not and I think thats precious

there is one problem tho, while their sense of smell is VERY strong, stronger than bloodhounds and etc, its made for being able to detect things very far away in freezing temperatures... so they're extremely sensitive

Which wouldn't be that much of an issue if barnacles wasn't in all sorts of more tropical environments...

In thr artic all u can smell is other people, animals, and which was is home

But if he's not in the octopod or under the water,but somewhere where there's THOUSANDS of insects,hundreds of pollinating plants, and tons and tons of different creatures all at once-

I think thats be overwhelming and he's probably be allergic to sooooooo many plants poor guy 🥺

Also even tho he like trims and thins out his thick coat, and even has a little cooling pack vest sort of thing under his uniform he can still overheat pretty easily

Cuz yk, the several inches of brown fat or blubber? Someone might say "hey just adjust ur diet and whatever to lose it" but that would be VERY UNHEALTHY for him... mess with the balance of his bodys systems yk? so its really not an option;^;

So yeah he still tends to overheat and thats why having his room canoncially set to actual arctic temperatures every night helps him sleep better and feel better

Usually alot of octonauts missions happen under water or in gups or maybe they'll spend some time on an island and it'll be hot

But with extended time spent in warmer climates he has to take alot more breaks and it can be alot harder for him

Also I think that he had a period in his early 20s college years where he was like kinda lowkey depressed because he was learning more about global warming and capitalism

, it didn't last too long fortunately because yk he met professor inkling who was already developing his idea for the octonauts

and they actuslly became really good friends and it really came together as a realistic thing when tweak got wind of em

On a more depressing note global warming for polar bears in a world where they're actual people with a unique culture and heritage means some totally different stuff

Like its not even the fact they can't even engage in their own cultural traditions (cough traveling in that one arctic global warming special where they were all exhausted cuz all the melted sea ice cough)

Its also the loss of genuine homes (in my au they're kinda like ice hobbit houses 🥰since polar bears irl will dig out shallow resting spots or mama bears will have dens with a toasty 30 degrees farenheit), architectural collapses, traditional jobs that can only be done in the arctic being lost, and being forced into more southern grounds because more and more just can't rely living there anymore

And I think that'd be super depressing to see in real time, its a cultural death

Heck even irl there's so many grizzlies going north and polar going south that they've actually started to mix and start having hybrids (grolar bears). And the thing is they're so genetically compatible that their species can actually develope into their own separate identity that might totally replace most if not all polar bears sense they're just more adapt to the changing climate and have more range,with benefits from both species

And while that sounds great on paper and makes sense and is obviously fine for them to have easier lives, I think in thr context of this world it would leave barnacles with some conflicted feelings

Because the thing is there used to be concerns about polar bears having to leave their homes to live is societies and communities that just... that their jobs wouldn't fit to. That would be physically harder for them to be healthy in. That they'd have to give up so many thousands of years of traditions thatd be impossible to carry over in.

Idk its late and I've got one braincell and idk if this makes sense and im sorry if it got depressing 😭

But yeah, so there's more and more of these younger people grolar bears, that just... will never have that full connection to their heritage. And idk I think its sad and maybe I'm projecting

Also I think that if barnacles was ever sad he'd just cope by playing the accordian lol,like the one meme of the girl playing "its a mental breakdown ✨" on a kazoo 😭

Let's end this on a happier note tho, circling back to barnacles being several feet taller than his entire crew, like-

We all already know this guy emotionally adopts every living being in sight

And well, his ENTIRE CREW literally, and I mean very literally and physically, looks up to him-

Like they all gotta turn their heads up and loon at him with big hopeful eyes ready for whatever he has to say

And im gonna be honest his composure is alot stronger than mine cux I would CRY because of how adorable that is

Like he knows its probably so unprofessional and might be seen as condescending BUT DAMN IT HE CANT HELP THR CUTENESS AGRESSION!!! HE WANTS TO SQUISH THEIR TINY FACES!!!

so sometimes hell have a very Serious and Leadership-like Captain Conversation, and then thr SECOND hes out of their sight (and hopefully hearing) HE JUST HAS TO STOP HIMSELF FROM JUST CRYING-

Cuz the second hes out of sight he will LOSE ALL COMPOSURE and need a minute because he loves them so much AND THEYRE SO FCKING SMALL-

Its kinda funny tho cuz ur captain barnacles is a pretty tiny guy, wonder howd that work for u XD

Anyways gn or whatever time it is for u 🐻‍❄️✨✨✨

Also he and Bianca call at least every week for an hour and frequently send eachother updates about what they're up to

He could talk to her about anything and she's good at talking sense into him

He makes sure that natquick gets plenty of social interaction too, that man is like his father figure

(Kinda sad but I headcanon barnacles dad died when he was really young cuz of an accident where ice collapsed, probably did not help how he felt when he got stuck in an icy hole as a kid 💀🙏)

ALSO

Barnacles looking up at u vvv

Barnaclea being his lil theater kid self^

Wait~ they don't love you ✨like I love you ✨🥰

Barnacles half awake at a late night mission when everything is done and they're just driving the gup a back home

Barnacles and Bianca on a video call

[umbreoncomplex]

clay lives au where he very quickly enters stardom as a famous astronaut after hat-2, especially being the youngest astronaut ever. but apollo still doesnt really tell anyone about them. he mentions his childhood friend or will sometimes mention him by the name clay but that's about it. says his friend likes space and works at a space center but doesn't say much else. and it's not like its the clay terran. thatd be dumb. right?

and as friends do he loves telling embarrassing stories like when clay tried piercing his ear using a pen. so everyone apollo is friendly with knows about clay, apollos childhood friend whos a huge fucking idiot that can't be trusted with a microwave. and then clay shows up the waa. unannounced, of course. athenas like 💭(HOLY SHIT CLAY TERRAN?? WHAT'S HE DOING HERE) and trucys like jawdropped. and apollo rolls his eyes and groans and like "well if it isn't sir dirt dirt. what do you want clay?" and everyones like "THATS CLAY???" apollos like "? yeah. what about it. do you want to see the scar from his failed piercing" and clays like "how could you! i thought you swore yourself to secrecy. we even made a fake nda" "should've made me sign a real one then"

[iwaasfairy]

Faiwyyy, àll these mentions of mirror mirror and indelible and jskdkd of course oikawa and atsuko, now i'm thinking about either satoru-nii or stepdad gojo in a hotd/got modern verse 🥹

Yan!Satoru-nii who does everything to prevent his little sis from being arranged to be married to the Zen'in clan or

Yan!Stepdad Satoru who only agree to be married to your mom because his end goal is you, who has the most ideal technique to be paired with the six eyes and limitless

I'm sorry but like the lack of gojocest fic is just 😔

Is thERE A LACK ???? 👁️👁️ bC I WIll gladly step up to the plateeee omfjdjdkgkg I mean there’s not enough hours in the day for me to write all the fics I wanna write but yeA YOURE SO RIGHT ꒰๑˃͈꒵˂͈๑꒱୭̥*ﾞ̥♡⃛ THATD BE SOOOO SEXXXyYYY I love satoru nii so much I have always loved the idea of big brudder satoru having a blossoming crush on his little sister anD ITs honestly mean n gross that I haven’t gotten to write it yet >:/

Skkskdkdmffj I can just imagine satoru being like the,,, he was the only child for a while until you, so now he’s just got an insane fascination for each of you stuff n seeing himself mirrored in you and it’s not like he wants to make you into him,,, it’s just that you look so fucking adorable following big brother’s lead. definitely if you’re kinda wide eyed and naïve n trust him too much for your own good. double definitely when you’re so dependant on him that you let him do whatever

like watching you as you undress and putting his hands all over n pinching and playing with your body until you can’t stand it. or sticking his fingers or sometimes him tongue into your mouth. or asking you to help him out, but really he just wants to embarrass you by putting you on your knees between his legs n shoving your head into his crotch, or holding you there, or generally just putting his crotch near you at all. and making you touch him “like this, like this, good girl—“ through his underwear even though you don’t understand what he gets out of it.

because then he always asks “do you like your big brother? you like me, yeah?” and “how much?” and he’s always so touchy with you and he dotes on you and he calls you a smart girl or such a good little sister when you listen to him,,, so of course you wanna help. Even if he has some weird requests

[questionthedompler]

James was certainly a character; do you ever think about him? Would you like to see him again and if so what would you do/say?

look when a guy walks in and not only wrecks the room youre stuck in and makes fucking stupid demands (a DRESS and a fucking CASSEROLE) before tearing your nose off your fucking face you cant help but think about him from time to time no matter how much i try not to

i havent seen him since it happened and to be brutally honest dudes i dont know WHAT id do if i saw him

id like to say id yell at him or try to hit him but you know i work out every day and my arms get so tired cuz of it so i probably wont try to hit the guy cuz thatd be embarrassing for him like i get it he deserves to be fucking humbled especially by ME but nah i wouldnt do that

maybe id just turn and leave because if pim is with me when i see the dude i dont want to put him at risk of the guy and his psychotic behavior cuz if he punched pim i think pim would just straight up die

what im getting at dude is that i dont know what id do so yeah lets not think about it

[poetryandfluffycats]

do you think if you fucked mayoi in the walls/vents of the es building and he was loud there'd be a new ghost story going around? bc i do and. yeah i want to see him all embarrassed when he finds out we were heard.

(ive been lurking for a while... can i be 🥐 anon.. im def not the person who has been coming here to speak shu thoughts thatd be insane (i am that was me))

this is actual such a fun idea perhaps one day I shall steal it and create a full fic of it. public and semi-public sex with mayoi is mmmm because he gets so squirmy and blushy and embarrassed and he's trying so hard to not let those noises out but since your fucking him so good he can't help it. his whimpers would be like 100 times louder and slutier and that makes the experiance 100 times better for the both of you

ofc you can be 🥐anon I'll add u to the list

[flmed]

CHARACTER SHEET.

𝐁𝐀𝐒𝐈𝐂𝐒 .

full name.   johann frederick dreyman

nicknames / aliases. jo. j. jbear. commie jo. silvertongue.

height.   6 ' 1 / 184.

age.   46 - 50.

zodiac.   leo sun. taurus moon. gemini rising.

spoken languages.   german. english. french. russian. italian. intermediate dutch. intermediate greek. intermediate darija. now learning japanese bc @wellfell &. some spanish ..

𝐏𝐇𝐘𝐒𝐈𝐂𝐀𝐋 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐒 .

hair colour.   dark brown, black

eye colour.   dark brown.

skin tone.   he's white; when he is embarrassed or blushing, he will easily have red cheeks, but he likes to get sun-tanned in greece.

body type.  mesomorph.

dominant hand.   right. but he practices his left hand for trickery.

posture.   he exercises so he doesn't have bad posture, but pulling a muscle once in a while is inevitable..

scars.   burnt scar on lower back near back dimples on right because fire wood ceiling fell to his back. nobody could see it unless you have sex with him. some faded scars from childhood on his abdomen

tattoos.   no.. he doesn't like to have tattoos on his body because it lasts for a lifetime &. he wishes his partner won't have silly, meaningless tattoos lmfaaoo.

birthmarks.   under jaw on left, moles on his chest &. back.

most noticeable features.   his eyes. he has those bambi eyes &. when hes smiling he looks like 😁 emoji, his long neck because he doesn't like to wear a tie .. his handsome features duh.

𝐂𝐇𝐈𝐋𝐃𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐃 .

place of birth.   karlsruhe, germany. but his mother returns to untertürkheim, stuttgart, which is not really far away but jo will say he's from there because he was raised there

siblings.  none but has cousin, nina.

parents.   martha dreyman &. uwe günter.

𝐀𝐃𝐔𝐋𝐓 𝐋𝐈𝐅𝐄 .

occupation.  general counsel for Frei-Libertas, a security company that provides security service that's almost .. working under the shadow hence he never truly talks about his company exactly.

current residence(s).   an apartment in nyc. a house in london. houses in berlin &. stuttgart, and lakehouse in strausberg, outside berlin &. summerhouse in paros, greece. most of verses i tend to make him live in nyc, &. he's suffering there 😭.

close friends.    @parieur 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️. but for npcs thatd be timothy maier, fellow friend from his first job in law firm. some ' artists ' friends but those chiff is majorly closest friend.

relationship status.   single, divorced, ready to mingle. he has no children so .. yeah. he has several situationships too ig.

driver’s license.   yes. he drives up to 200km/h+ in autobahn with his porsche .. driver's license is needed.

criminal record. �� not really. he was questioned for his mother's death.

vices.   pride. that's one biggest vice.

𝐒𝐄𝐗 & 𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐄 .

sexual orientation.   bisexual with women-leaning .. unlike having sex with women, jo is more selective &. has to know the men partner because of his pride.

preferred sexual role.   dominant. there's no other than being a dominant ..

libido.    high, heh.

turn-ons.   when you kiss his neck,, he'll sigh whilst playing with your hair but you must have dark hair .. even good if it's long because uh .. he likes to play with it. oh yeah &. 🍑 but issa okay if 🍒, he's just a man..

turn-offs.   lack of response to his foreplay/dirty talk .. become bossy/possessive like ' you belong to me '

love language.   physical touch &. quality time &. gift giving.

relationship tendencies.    he aims to have a partner who's equally in his field of business/same profession for safety, understanding reasons &. seeks tad younger around 3-5 years BUT WHAT'S SO FUNNY ABOUT THIS IS THAT HE ALWAYS HAVE PARTNERS IN STORYLINES WHO ARE FAR YOUNGER THAN HIM &. A RESULT FROM WHIM ONS/FLINGS GSKSG. so sex is majorly reason he's with the person because emotionally invested in building a relationship is '???" bc their first approach is sex. but truthfully he's affectionate, loving person but he won't verbally establish that he's exclusive with them unless there's a discussion about it hence it feels like fleeting. BUT he wants to have a child from loving relationship without marrying each other.. he'll cook, buy you things, &. will prods you about things he thinks :// unless you tell him that you don't like him to do so bc that means that's who they're &. how comfortable they're to be like that with him. he'll call you darling, beloved, but if he calls you liebe, meine liebe, mein leben ; he loves you.

𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐋𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐄𝐎𝐔𝐒 .

hobbies to pass time.   playing guitar, trumpet, or piano if he has it. or reading and watch some foreign films, builds car legos/miniatures, driving his motorcycle or car, builds some DIY projects like table .. build his own car IF HES REALLY THAT BORED GAKAGALAB.

mental illnesses.    diagnosed depression lolz. c-ptsd.

self-confidence level. mf has big confidence unless you crush it on first try; he doesn't like to make mistakes.

. . tagged by @cartelheir

. . tagging @0brighta @foxtaeil @songb1rd @medicbled @solarisgod @crimeclean &. anyone else fr ..

[disgustinggf]

@bbexoxo girl firstly i dont know how u got more fixated on me saying u stole my text posts than people saying ur a catfish

however u can look at dates of my text posts and when u search them up elsewhere u would see that they were reposted on twitter nd other apps LATER :) so stop trying to help urself cuz no one believes u lol plus even if u did take from other apps (which u didnt cuz ur posts are 50% mine and thatd be too much of a coincidence), no one likes content stealers who cant form their own sentences. also i had friends look on pinterest and none of my stuff is there :)

another thing - if u got no time to stalk me, how come when i originally blocked u like a month ago, i got blocked back immediately? and other people got blocked back as soon as they blocked u too. so u do sit there and check this shit? but got no time for all the other stuff? mhm sure so believable

oh another thing ur acting legit the same as to last april (only attacking me when i wasnt even the one who exposed u), same asks, only empty and inactive blogs defending u so yeah no just quit this bs and remake ur account already cuz thats what ur obviously gonna do

also id like to mention how it must be such a funny coincidence how when u got called out u werent online so NONE of us got asks about it but as soon as u got online hours later we all immediately started getting asks about it. juuuust like last time

and where the fuck did ur tattoo and freckles on ur body disappear? i didnt even notice it but other people did so like can u at least try to catfish right lmfao embarrassing

[sweepweep]

Ok so I have reached the end of Totally Spies season 3 which was a three parter and it is wild like always.

1. The girls got a promotion is super spies or something along with this random dude who they said was the most exceptional because when he was a baby he saw an action movie playing in the hospital he learned martial arts right then and there. As a newborn baby.

2. This same man who I am dubbing "Spy Boy" because that's literally all he is and he and his anime protagonist voice are so insane. He started out as a student among the spies, then when all the spies showes interest in him he said there was enough of him to go around, then he gets captured in goo that chokes you, then he switches to the dark side, then he saves the girls, then he tells them that he was only PRETENDING to be a bad guy because he knew they could handle whatever their imposter instructor (the bad guy during this) threw at them, then he started repeating the lessons they ALREADY LEARNED, and then at the end of the day when everything is said and done he goes "Oh! Yeah! I'm your teacher and these holographic teachers that have been teaching you this whole time are different parts of my personality, not yours (because the bad guy told them they were different parts of the spies' personalities earlier)! :D" LIKE. SIR???? WHY DO YOU KEEP SWITCHING SIDES AND IF YOU WERE THE INSTRUCTOR WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY ANYTHING??????

3. Jerry has a twin brother??? Canonically????? And his whole villain origin story is that Jerry threw him under the bus ONCE in fourth grade while they were cheating off of each other during the exam. That. That's it. And Jerry's brother got plastic surgery so he didn't look like Jerry. And when he broke out of jail at the end of the episode he reveals himself to actually have been wearing a mask and he looks like Jerry and pretends to be Jerry and gets let out. Then he rips THAT mask off and reveals himself to look exactly like the first mask except this time it's his real face.

4. Jerry confessed to cheating during the exam during FOURTH GRADE, and it is being taken INCREDIBLY SERIOUSLY. LIKE. JERRY WAS CRYING. And now he has to repeat fourth grade.

THIS JUST SHOWED UP I AM SO SORRY

Yeesh man when I was that old I couldn’t even walk babies are made different these days

I think hes just reeeaaally indecisive and wants to play it off

THREW HIM UNDER THE BUS?????? Also, he seems like another very indecisive guy

What?????? If I had to repeat fourth grade thatd be sooo embarrassing I can’t remember anything we did

[lubotomies]

trick or treat

every once in a while youd go into the tags and see random people making posts thatd be like 'LISTEN UP' and then go on like a long ass tangent on how the eddsworld fandom is ruined and 'Tord left, tom left, DO YOU ALL WANT MATT TO LEAVE TOO!??!?' or something theyd always find random ass trivial shit to say is ruining the community and then theyd end it with 'if you guys dont STOP .... i will stop writing eddsworld fanfic. Yeah. Thats right' and it made my face burn with second hand embarrassment

[moved2fshfish]

HEY SORRY ITS ME AGAIN WHO WANTS TO DRAW YOUR BAND AU i was wondering what is Kyles role in the band, and if there's others in the band? and if so, what do they play? sorry i just dont wanna get it wrong thatd be soooo embarrassing THANK YOU

YEAH NO WORRIES!!!

So basically kyle is the drummer )and she has 2 braids and a green bandana)

kenny is the lead vocalist (b/c of that one episode where he was an opera singer or something)

craig is on keyboard

stan bass guitar

marjorine lead guitar!!!!

[foxtriestobiteandmaimandkilland]

god im so tired i feel like im. yea. but like genuinely FUCK trans people who try 2 be fuckin trans police likeeee FUCK U when ur tryna reinvent gender roles I DONT NEED TO BE COMPLIMENTED ON HOW WELL I PASS I PASS PERFECTLY WELL AS MYSELF BC I AM ME MOTHERFUCKER I DONT NEED TO BE A CIS PERSONS IDEA OF A MAN BC IM A TRANS PERSONS IDEA OF A MAN U FUCKINGGGG cop,. stop fucking cringing at me wearing a skirt go stick ur head in a toilet u fuckingggggg. bitchasss motherfucker. there is NO way i wanna wear fuckinn trackies n a hoodie all day bc that works just fine 4 other ppl but it gives me fuckin MORE dysphoria stop projecting ur dysphoria onto me youuuuu fuckingggggg. pussy. u can enjoy ur dysphoria hoodie without putting me into it as well its not a get along shirt u fucking idiottttt. wed get along better if u didnt shove our heads into the same hole. yeah. im justtt. pissed. attttttttttt. cops. for existing. and ppl who act like cops. kill the cop in ur head bla bla bla.

anyways

. im gonnago to sleep. tmrw is gonna b better bc god. today was a whole lotta anxiety. not the bad kind. bc i realised today. i finally have problems that dont feel like theyre making me feel so fucking empty. like im soooo anxious and worried abt these problems but these r normal people problems now likeeee. i can cope w this kinda stuff. wowies. so tired. gonnna fall asleep at my desk. this music is loud iand it feels like itss. a big ocean. ive almost drowned so many times yknow. crazy. i wanna swim in a river w my friends. only river close to me is dirty as fuck tho n will give me diseases. or probably has a body in it somewhere. wanna find a good river i wanna. yeah. ok my head feels like. a carousel or whatevr. or like. oh my god i havet listened to hsi song in so long this is so 2021 core. wow. did  i just type core with my own two hands. god. ok. gonna text my friend. and be like. i love u . and then im gonna sleep. and think abt my friends and my more than friends and my less than friends. forgot hwo good this song was. mmm yea. ok. tmrw got english period3 . reminder 2msyelf incaase i get scared i get the period wrong. lemme check acrually

yep. english period3. 11.15-12.15. right there. and also. reminder 2 myself to. get to Maples house at 3.50ish and then. we go to my place. and if it rains thats good. if it doesnt rain we cry forevers. we could maybe like. chill in the garden. or watch movies. movies r good. could even kick my sister out of the livin room so we could watch movies there. n like. give her a distraction. or like. let her watch as well but idk if wed want her. bc like. yea thatd be awkward. idk. we could just watch movies in my room. or we could watch heartstopper like we said that one time bc its feelgood and i love feelgood shows and its aalso smth ik is good and is familiar 2 me and my autistic ass is scared of watching new films. id that an autism thing. well my ass is still autistic. so fuck u. and ur allistic ass. unless its not then i apologise to ur ass. ok.nighty nighty. oscar if u see this . um. Hi . ur coolllllllll as fuck ok yeah fuck u im gonna embarrass u in a publiccc postttt by sayingh howwww cool u rrrrr okie yea byebye. and also byebye everyone whios not oscar. ur also cool but not as cool.

[zephyrusz]

it was omly a matter of time before i lost my mind. its almost andrews birthday so yk what that means! yap!! andrew yap i love andrew hes amazing and him and harper make me go insane!! happy early birthday dirt man i love you

- when harper first arrived, andrew caught their eye.

not because of his standout appearance- no, no. his personality shone bright. he had a certain look in his eye that reminded harper of themself. too introverted to make their voice heard. but he seemed nice, and they felt like he would be a good companion, he was straightforward and no-nonsense.

- they hadnt gotten the courage to speak to him until they bumped into each other around a corner (turns out they both walk close to walls and dont pay attention to their surroundings).

andrew seemed to tense. harper flushed red out of embarrassment- the guy they wanted to be friends with was already off to a bad start with them.

just one simple compliment could mend whatever awkward setting they set, "your eyes are pretty."

he seemed taken aback, barely hesitating before briskly walking back to his room.

- after that, their interactions were very scarce. seeing each other at meals, the infirmary, that was it.

- until they had a match together.

harpers first match was nothing but a wreck. they locked eyes with the photographer and froze in fear, feet rooted to the ground and staring like a deer looking down the shaft of an arrow. safe to say their teammates werent happy about their cowardice.

andrew, on the other hand, was used to rescuing early. he didnt care for their poor performance, but he tended to be more understanding than others. he will forever brush it off as "just doing his job as a rescuer", but he truly cared for their safety in the match.

so, for the entire match, he kept them safe. maybe they weren't too bad, just a kid who needed support. he didnt particularly enjoy company, but over the course of the rough ten mintue game, he figured they didnt care about how scary he seemed- his odd appearance. his opinion on them grew neutral. he was open to giving them a chance.

the match was a loss. it didnt matter to andrew much more than it did harper. he stayed with them, showed them the way to the infirmary, and left without saying a word.

- since then, harper was determined to be his friend. they even found purple flowers in the garden they brought to him afterwards as a thank you gift.

- andrew was more hesitant. harper had never shown him any difference in any of the survivors, but nobody could be trusted.

- but eventually, the two grew close, they began having more conversations, comforting each other after bad games and being the other's main support systems.

- they both latched on to one another almost immediately after getting comfortable. andrew yearned for a friend, no matter how much he hates to admit it, and harper often helped him forget about his poor reputation. (thinkjng about that one wreck it ralph quote that kinda went "if that kid likes me, how bad could i be?" or something yeah thatd them.) harper saw him as a big brother. it had been five years, but andrew seemed to fill the hole in their heart cassian left behind.

- to everyone, their friendship was very surprising. an introverted, shy man who could be scary at times paired with a cowardly, trembling sopping wet cat of a person? no, that cant be right. but the two helped and related to each other in ways the other survivors couldnt really understand.

- they would spend nights together, sometimes in silence, other times talking and ranting about the others. nights normally spent in harpers room, andrew resting on their bed listening to them at their desk, their quill scribbling around on the paper as he gave feedback on their rough draft lyrics.

- andrew surprisingly loved hearing what harper has to say about the other survivors. they both love gossip- andrew only respecting claims he knew were true- after all, rumors are hideous things. but harper would be sure to fill him in on anything going on that he didnt want to find out himself.

- a few weeks before harpers birthday, he desperately asked tracy to ask if she could borrow harpers mandolin, and then give it to him. he wanted to do something special for his first real, close friend. so, what better way than to get tracy to be a spy, asking harper questions about how to play, then learning and relaying them back to andrew?

on their birthday, andrew sat by their side with trembling fingers, taking an embarrassingly long time to pick at the strings, playing a slow and pathetic rendition of "happy birthday".

harper broke into tears right on the spot.

- theyre both incredibly special to one another, filling the empty holes in their hearts with someone to love and care for. real friends- a first for both of them.

[seize-bestie]

im gonna ramble a bit about how being a fictive of charlie impacts my personal impression of the film.... under a read more because people are weird about this topic

The Guilt ive been mentioning. i gotta mention that i think. its difficult to talk about cameron and how charlie treated him without it devolving into me being. almost aggressive towards charlie. because i regret it! because ive regretted it from the moment i saw blood on his face and the moment i saw his face drop in the cave and every word tasted bitter but i never stopped doing it. and i still regret it even though it technically never happened.

and like, in general its difficult to talk about charlie. im very much more likely to be. kinda mean to him. your harsher on yourself than others, right? but also im just worried ill say something wrong. what if my memories get all tangled? yeah thatd be embarrassing.

idk.

just wanted to get it off my chest

[youre-in-big-trouble]

I mean with the breaks you have left and time till midnight that would work out to like every half hour or 45 minutes yeah? Unless I screwed up that math which is very possible😂😂

-🥟

i still have four hours left until midnight, dont worry! and i have four more breaks, so thats basically just one every hour. but, sure, i'll try peeing in a half hour... i DID just down a whole water bottle and a soda, so... MAYBE ill pee a tiny bit... itd honestly be really embarrassing if i peed much at all lol

i think im at around 152oz for the day so far. maybe i'll end up doubling my original goal of 100oz! thatd be funny :p