#yeah sorry I didn't post on tumblr yesterday

[barabansetbabets]

You kiss your niblings with this mouth?

Failure Brothers, day 2

Also on AO3

"Motherfucker!"

"Swear Jar!"

"What? The kids are not around, it's fine!"

"Absolutely not in my house! And Mabel feels it if we swore, I swear it."

"That’s MY shack, thank you."

"That’s so not the point. Put a damn coin in the jar."

"Ah! So do you!"

"What? No! It’s your fault, distracting me!"

"Dura Lex Sed Lex, my brother! What are you even doing with this money anyway?"

"None of your business, you latinized pretentious fucker!"

"I have the right to know where my swear coins go! Hey, come back there! You’re not supposed to embezzle your nibling’s money!"

[cas-writes-stuff-ig]

Regina's Pet

CONTENT:

Word Count: 10,210 words

f!/nb!reader x regina george (dom!regina sub!reader)

-reader and regina smoke weed and cigarettes, but reader has never used a bong before

-drinking

-the reader has a shoulder tattoo and Regina finds

-cady and janis are friends with the plastics

-smut (she collars you later) (mommy kink) (degrading and praise) (semi-public stuff) (a bit of BDSM) (she eats you out and fingers you, and she rides your face) (edging and overstim)

-gross guy hitting on Regina, reader helps her

-fluffy shower aftercare

-she dates you in the end

-regina is kinda more nice here, but she still calls you a dumbass

(btw the smut is at the beginning and the end if you want to skip to it, but there's a lot of teasing build-up between there.)

Hi, i’m really new to writing so sorry if its shitty. I hope you like it. I might make a Part 2

(small unrelated note: I accidentally posted this while I was still writing it out yesterday, mb to those 15 people who saw this and didn't read the finished version, I'm kinda new to writing on Tumblr [i also haven’t written anything since i was 13 so bear with me])

——————————————————————————————

In university you were more or less a wallflower, leaned against a wall near the kitchen counter watching people come and go with drinks, watching the dance floor. Your friends had disappeared somewhere in the house leaving you unintentionally. It was Friday, and the night was young.

You looked into your red solo cup and downed it all, then walked to the kitchen counter to pour yourself another cup of liquid courage with coke.

Just as you were about to resume to leaning against a wall a hand tapped your shoulder from behind and you saw her, Regina George. You assumed she just came from the crowd of people dancing since you hadn’t seen her before that.

She’s been in some of your lectures and had taken a liking to you, her normal spot was always near you or next to you, so you could share notes, but she always had friends around her. With others, she was snarky but with you she was snarky in a more friendly-flirty way. You couldn’t tell if she was actually flirting or not. But she often invited you out to study outside of class.

She was taller than you and you looked up a bit at her, then she stepped forward and you stepped back against the wall “Hey little wallflower,” she grinned as she saw your face of surprise, “Didn’t expect you to be here” and looked you up and down. This was one of the only times you saw her in a non-educational setting.

While of course she looked stunning, you looked down at your own outfit and scratched the back of your head, you wore just a T-shirt partially tucked in jeans. “Yeah kind of, I don’t know where my friends went. I got a little lost.” You admitted.

“You smoke?” she asked.

“Weed or Nicotine?”

“Either, I’ve got both if you want” her voice enticed you like a siren call.

Tired of standing around watching like a loner you nod “Preferably weed right now, just warning you, I’m a bit of a lightweight, but sure” you said

“Hmm, okay loser, c’mon” Regina smirked took your free hand, and led you through the crowd toward the side yard, where two girls were sitting around a table passing a bong, finishing up a bowl. You recognize them as part of Regina’s pack of friends, but you never formally talked to them.

Regina let go of your hand, “Hey guys you know Y/N, Y/N you know Gretchen and Karen right? Right.” she sat down on an empty chair and beckoned you to sit in the empty one next to her.

Gretchen stood “Actually we were just about to go get more drinks and find Cady and Janis, we’ll be back Gina” Karen also stood and handed Regina the bong and the lighter.

When they were out of earshot you whispered nervously to Regina, “Um, Regina? I’ve smoked weed but I’ve never used a bong before” you were bright red wondering if she’d judge you or something.

She had stared packing a small bowl and laughed at you a little “Sweet little thing” her voice was flirty but you couldn’t tell if it was just the alcohol in both your systems. She turned back to you “Move closer to me, I’ll help you” she ordered. You pushed your chair toward Regina and sat in front of her, knees almost touching. “Hands out flat hold the bottom, sweetheart” then she placed it on your hands. “Now, breathe in” you did as you were told and the water bubbled. Then, she lit the bowl and looked straight into your eyes, and then finally took the bowl out and nodded signaling for you to stop breathing in.

You breathed out the smoke which felt smoother than any smoke you’d ever had in your lungs “Good job Y/N, baby” her voice was a little condescending, but you warmed inside still at the praise. She took it out of your hands and used it herself. You alternated turns using it, with her still helping you and only giving you small short hits.

Feeling more at ease, you relaxed more in your chair and melted in it a bit. Regina looked at you cunningly, obviously enjoying that you were starting to let loose. “Regina, why are you hanging out with me I’m not exactly the most riveting thing at this party” you circled your hand insinuating that she was the riveting thing here.

“You intrigue me sweetheart” she said nonchalantly “Do i need another reason?”

“No I guess not..”

She added sarcastically “Oh, I remember I only keep you around for lecture notes and help with homework.” you laughed and she spoke again “you don’t look half bad either.” Was that Regina saying she thought you looked good? You ignored that thought and took a sip from your solo cup.

“Hey Regina” you slurred your words a bit while she took another hit herself “Can I have another hit, please?” and grinned at her.

You leaned forward so you could hold your hand out again, instead she grabbed your shirt collar eliciting a gasp from you, lips as close to hers without kissing, she started blowing smoke into your mouth and you obliged breathing it in. Then pulled you in for a quick kiss, leaving you speechless. “Cat got your tongue loser?” still holding your shirt, keeping you from moving backward.

Pausing for a moment trying to process what happened and to find the words, you spoke softly your inhibitions lost “No, you do” and she pulled you in again for a deeper kiss tasting her lipstick. She let go of your shirt and her thumb cleaned your lips of her lipstick.

Your head spun from the alcohol, weed, and adrenaline, your body was warm and fuzzy. “Fuck, you’re amazing” you said under your breath without thinking. Your heart hammered.

“Of course I am Y/N” she stood up and held her hand out to you, a silent order for you to get up and take her hand.

“You’re like a goddess” she stared down at you, like you were her obedient servant. Then you took her hand.

“I know loser”

——————————————————————————————

She called an Uber for both of you and brought you back to her dorm. She told you that her roommate wouldn’t come back tonight, since they head home on the weekends.

She led you inside and you asked “You sure your roommate isn’t gonna come back?” you closed the door behind you.

“Ugh no, shut up don’t ruin the mood just kiss me” she shoved you against the door and tilted your head up to look at her “You gonna be good for me?”. You just nodded and kissed her, she pushed her knee between your thighs and you whined into her. You opened your mouth more to let her tongue inside.

With your core aching for more touch, you started grinding on her thigh and she pushed her knee up higher into you. Regina broke the kiss with a bite to your lip eliciting another moan from you. “Shit- Regina” you buried your face in the crook of her neck and moaned out, she took your face to look back at her.

“Do you want more?” she asked, but you only nodded. “Ah ah” Regina scolded you “use your words.”

“Shit, please Regina? Please, fuck me. Be mean to me” You begged her not thinking about your words.

She smirked at you feigning disgust “Oh? Shy, innocent, little wallflower is so dirty” She removed her leg from between your knees and started undoing your belt and pants. Then she walked away from you towards the bed and started removing her shirt, while you did the same. She then sat on the bed with only her panties on and spread her legs. “You want me to fuck you? Get on your knees and earn it”

You both were still very crossfaded and you eagerly went on your knees kissing her from her knee to her inner thigh biting as you went. You looked up and saw her flushed face and kissed above her clit through her panties. “Take them off. Make mommy feel good.”

“Yes mommy” You loved her telling you what to do. You slid her panties off and she spread her legs for you. Regina’s pussy was wet, and hot. She looked down at you expectantly. “You’re beautiful” you said before pressing your tongue to her clit. Regina moaned out and you squeezed your thighs together, trying to relieve your own ache.

You tongued at her clit and pulled away to use a hand to rub circles around her bud “Can I use my fingers inside you?” and she let out a yes between moans and you watched her face as you slid two fingers easily inside her wet cunt and curled them pressing her g-spot her head threw back. You then returned your tongue to her clit pressing and licking harder.

“Shit baby, I’m close, don’t stop” she grabbed the back of your head and pulled you closer suffocating you between her legs a little bit. You rubbed your thighs together trying to relieve yourself and moaned into her pussy while you curled your fingers inside of her.

A loud “Fuck” between pants and moans was the last thing she said before she arched her back, one hand pressing you hard into her pussy the other supporting her while she came on your fingers, you continued the assault on her clit while she rode out her orgasm. When she finished you licked her pussy and thighs clean.

"You have a tattoo, I never took you for a tattoo kind of person" You looked up at her as she traced your shoulder. Regina found it hot "You never told me" It was always well hidden behind a normal tshirt

You replied "You never asked" and gave her a smile "It's not finished yet though"

She pulled you up onto the bed with her and you straddled one of her thighs. “You did such a good job pet” She still breathed heavily, and she kissed you tasting herself on your tongue.

You grinded down on her thigh a bit while you worshiped her body, a little whine escaping your mouth. Though your core aches for attention you dare not ask in fear of upsetting the goddess. Instead you worshipped her body with a trail of kisses from her neck to her breast. Leaving hickeys and marks only on places that could be covered easily. When you leaned back to look at the marks you left, you just stared looking at her perfect figure.

You heard Regina let out a scoff “You done gawking at me sweetie?” you reddened realizing how long you stared for. Smirking at your embarrassment, she decided to give you mercy “You ready for your reward baby?” her voice sickly sweet and domineering.

“Please” you said under your breath, you couldn’t take waiting any longer, it ached between your legs.

Regina laughed a bit at you “So needy” She took a hand and signaled for you to lift your hips, her other hand placed on her thigh where you’d been grinding slightly. “Ride it, ride my fingers slut.”

You lowered down onto her hand and as soon as you took her fingers in she curled them hitting your g-spot, a loud moan escaped from your mouth and then you started to grind your hips. You covered your mouth with your hand and closed your eyes, your other hand on her shoulder supporting yourself. Riding her hand, the base of her palm rubbed against your clit “Shit- Regina..” you moaned out but muffled against your hand.

She stilled your hips and threatened “Move your hand, let me hear you or I’ll stop” you opened your eyes half-lidded and let your hand drop to Regina’s other shoulder supporting yourself with both hands now. “Good pet seems like you can follow orders hm”

She started guiding your hips against her hand to start you back up again. You didn’t break eye contact with her. You moaned out loudly when her hand from your hip found one of your nipples and pinched it hard. “Regina” you panted out desperately and she just bit her lip.

She curled her fingers repeatedly hitting your g-spot and let you grind, you synched your hips with her movements. Each press inside and each time your clit moved against her palm sent pleasure shooting through your body, and heat started to burn in your core “Fuck, Regina- please I’m close. I can’t” you were almost tipping over the edge

“Cum for me baby, go on” She instructed and your legs shook and you moaned out her name over and over, she continued to guide you through your orgasm still pressing against your inside until you stopped grinding against her hand.

When she started to pull her hand away, you lifted your hips to let her, Regina let her fingers slide through your slit and rubbed hard against your overstimulated clit. A loud whimper escaped, but you tried not to move away “Shit- Regina, I’m sensitive” You looked at her pleadingly, legs trembling

“I know baby” she smirked deviously as your legs shook “come one more time for me, can you do that?” she circled your clit faster.

“Yes, fuck- anything for you” you weren’t going to last long, especially when she talked to you like that.

Regina hummed “Such a pathetic toy for me aren’t you?” you whined out a yes and she pressed harder. She loved seeing you come undone.

“Regina, please, I’m close again” you managed to get out, then she started rubbing horizontal strokes right against your clit and you felt like you saw stars “Mommy- please I can’t, I can’t-”

“Go ahead pet” she purred in your ear and you came all over her hand again. This orgasm was more intense than the first, white-hot pleasure struck through you. She whispered praises and encouragement while you came, but she never slowed down wanting to prolong your orgasm as long as possible.

When you pulled your hips away you she brought her hand in front of both of you. “Look at how messy you are baby” then she made a show of licking your wetness off her hands.

You sat on her lap still straddling her and she sat up to kiss you, she wrapped her arms around your waist and your arms went around her shoulder and neck. She kissed your jawline and then your neck leaving a sizable hickey that would be hard to hide. She pulled back to look at you.

“That was incredible” you said breathily coming down from your orgasm high and the weed. “Thank you” you murmured quietly.

“You did say I was amazing” she pulled you close to her lips again, “of course I’m incredible in bed” sounding cocky as ever.

Regina let you climb off her and she helped you clean yourself up. You sat on the bed while she rummaged through her drawer and she threw a pink t shirt and a pair of sweats at you. She decided to keep the stray in her bed. “Stay tonight”

“Thank you” you said as you stood up and got changed into her pjs.

She rummaged more through her drawer and pulled out a small tape measurer “Sit up” she instructed and you did, then she wrapped it around your neck measuring it quickly.

You were confused, but before you could ask what it was for, she lifted the covers to get in bed and anxiety suddenly took over you. You were about to sleep in this gorgeous woman’s bed. But your mind raced. Was this just a fling? Were you really just kept around for homework and a good fuck? Your expression changed and you furrowed your eyebrows a tiny bit. “I’m gonna go get some water really quick” you grabbed her water bottle.

Before you could walk out, she said “Okay nerd, just come back” she sounded irritated, but the way her hand had tugged on your shirt showed you she wasn’t really upset.

“Of course” you grabbed your phone and walked out to the communal bathroom. You went to the sink and splashed water in your face. “Fuck” you said to yourself looking at the mirror, you then tilted your head to the side looking at the hickey she left on you. Your stomach fluttered, you’d just fucked one of the most beautiful people and she wants you to come back to bed.

You opened your phone to worried messages from your friends

Y/N: so sorry guys I’m at someone’s dorm right now

Max: shit we were worried about you, we tried finding you at the party but you weren’t there

Y/N: you guys have my location you know

Jade: whose dorm r you at? did you, yk?

You hesitated before texting back, fingers hovering over the keyboard. Your friends knew that Regina had taken a liking to you and gave you special treatment, they also knew what a huge crush you had on her

Y/N: i’m with regina...

Max: so you’re the one people saw with regina huh

Jade: hope you had fun

Y/N: mm details later, i’m going to bed goodnight

Jade: goodnight

Max: night

Next to the communal bathroom, was a small water fountain and you filled it.

You walked back to her room and she put her phone down quickly and lifted the covers for you to come in. “Hey Regina?” you said nervously as you got shifted to be comfortable in her bed.

“Yes” she replied while she took your arm around to hold her. You were cuddling her, and she scooted closer to you.

“I was just wondering, is this just a one time thing or..” you paused anxiously wondering if she was mad.

She turned over in your arms and looked at you “You’re a good fuck, you’re good with school, yes.” Regina said a bit sternly, almost offended at you asking. “but you don’t look half bad, and I actually happen to enjoy your company” she said under her breath. You wouldn’t know if she actually said that last part if you didn’t feel her breath on your lips.

“And if you want this again, which I know you do, then you’ll get it, understand?” she said cockily again, you didn’t reply but just passionately kissed her, and her hand came to cup your face. “I’ll take that as a yes” This was the nicest Regina ever was up till now, and it warmed you.

She turned back over for you to spoon her and you pulled her close this time and kissed her neck and shoulder. “Thank you, goodnight Regina” you murmured, sleepiness taking over your body.

“Goodnight loser” she replied with no malice in her voice. You nuzzled your face into her shoulder and Regina felt you smile into her shoulder. You were her loser, hers. And hopefully hers for more nights.

——————————————————————————————

In the morning you realized where you were, in Regina George’s bed and reddened at the realization. In the night you switched positions with her, and she really just held you like a teddy bear. You awkwardly slipped your phone out from under the pillow and checked the time, it was around 10AM.

You felt her stir and pull you close to her, and your heart beamed, the snappy Regina George likes to cuddle you. “Good morning” You felt her breathe against your neck.

“Good morning Regina, did you sleep okay?” you replied and turned over to look at her.

She let go to stretch her arms out a bit. “Good, you?”

“I haven’t slept that good in a while” You admitted, her smile full of pride.

“What? You worn out from last night baby” she teased and you just didn’t reply and turned your head into the pillow. You felt her get up out of the bed then you looked at what she was doing. She handed you your clothes from last night.

She threw you a glance and told you “Get dressed we’re going out.” She sat in her desk chair and started putting on make up.

“Wait what?” you asked surprised.

She turned around annoyed and looked at you “We’re going shopping loser, get dressed” she turned back to her mirror and teased “Don’t worry I wont look at you change, not like I didn’t see you naked last night right?” you flustered and got changed.

You sat on the bed waiting for bed to finish getting ready, kicking your feet a bit “Hey Regina, you got any coffee?” you said as she was slipping on her heels.

“Some in the fridge” you kneeled down to get some and opened a bottle of cold coffee.

“Thanks” you turned and saw her put on her black leather jacket, then she walked up to you, and used a finger to tilt your head up.

“You ready to go?” she smiled looking down at you, the heels she wore made her much taller than you. Your face was red and she reveled in the effect she had on you. You just nodded.

——————————————————————————————

You sat in the front passengers seat, and of course Regina had a sexy car too. You had chugged your coffee out of nervousness. Regina told you that Gretchen and Karen ended up at some frat guys house, and picked them up.

When they got in you really stuck out like a sore thumb. Three pretty girls and there was you. While they all talked amongst themselves about their night, you just stared at the road.

After arriving at some mall parking lot, Regina led the three of you through an expensive clothing store, you were in the back following them like a lost dog. Regina instructed them to find clothes for you, and you were stunned, you thought they were here for themselves, and you were there to tag along.

“Y/N, sit there got it?” She pointed at some chairs near a dressing room “We’ll be back.” You went to go sit and waited for them.

Gretchen and Karen came to you first and surprisingly they let you pick the clothes that you felt comfortable wearing. They put the clothes you didn’t choose on a rack and dispersed again to pick out clothes for themself. You yelled a “Thanks guys” before they were out of earshot.

Regina came back and walked toward you, “Hey try this on” she handed you a white wife beater and some ripped jeans and she looked through the clothes the girls had chosen for you, and removed some items from the pile. You saw a plastic bag so she had already bought herself some clothes while she was a walking around.

“Okay” You stepped into a dressing room and slipped the clothes on, you saw how expensive they were and grew anxious. You looked good but you still felt nervous and self-conscious, the shirt revealed your tattoo, which you never showed off. You poked your head out and saw Regina looking at you and raised an eyebrow, wanting to see the outfit.

You stepped out and she got up from her chair and approached you, circling you like prey. It made you nervous. Her hand touched your waist and she spoke, “Wear this with your belt” Regina walked in front of you and tucked the front of the shirt into the pants “You look cute” she put a finger on her lip and looked you up and down.

“Th-thanks” you replied nervously.

Regina then walked behind you and smacked your ass lightly. It made you yelp a little, and she let out a soft chuckle. Her fingers laced through the loops on the jeans on either side and pulled your hips into hers and whispered in your ear “Your ass looks nice in these jeans, wear this outfit tonight” Then she nipped at your ear, and you suddenly felt hot. She traced your shoulder again "Also show this off more often"

You stammered out “What’s tonight?” She let go of you and smiled.

“Another party of course” she sat down in the chair and crossed her legs “Get changed again, then let’s go pay”

When you stepped out, Regina took the clothes from you and handed you her bag of clothes to hold, and went to go to the register to pay for you. “You really don’t have to do that Regina it’s fine,” you said, feeling bad if she paid.

“If I’m going to be seen again with you tonight, especially on the dance floor, I want you to look good.” she glanced at you and inserted her card. It was nice that she paid even though it was for her own selfish purposes.

“You sure you don’t want me to pay you back” You felt bad because it was pricey.

“Don’t question me baby” She threw you a glare and walked past you handing you the bag of clothes making you hold both bags but you didn’t really mind that. And you nodded obediently.

Gretchen and Karen were also paying and when you all were reunited at the entrance, you offered to hold their bags as well, which they let you. You walked around more with them at the mall, Gretchen and Karen ended up walking off on their own to another part of the mall, then it was just you and Regina again.

You both were talking comfortably, even though your heart was racing, you wanted to tease her back a bit. You sat at a table, sitting across from each other, drinking some soda, then you leaned forward, elbows on the table resting your head in your hands smiling “So you really do enjoy my company don’t you”.

She rolled her eyes, “Whatever you think”

“Oh come on, you said it last night, I remember it” You tilted your head to the side and grinned wider.

She crossed her legs and her arms and was frustrated “I did, so what? We were drunk and high” She spat, and it almost hurt your feelings. She then put on a devious smile “And if you keep acting like a brat about it, you’ll regret it tonight, understand me, baby?”

Heat instantly went between your legs at what she was insinuating but you continued your facade of confidence “Regret it how?” you laughed and said “Should I fuck around and find out? or be good for you?”

She returned your sentiment “Up to you, either way you’ll end up begging” That made your facade crumble away and you felt your face grow red, and she just relished in your shyness, knowing she won.

Once you were reunited with them again, Regina drove Gretchen and Karen to their respective dorms, and you last. Before you got out the car she grabbed your shirt again and pulled you in for a quick kiss. “Meet back at mine at around 7, got it? I’ve got another errand to run”

“Yeah, I’ll see you there, thanks for taking me out today” You stepped out and waved.

“Mmhm whatever, thank me later” her tone was mean but she pulled her sunglasses down a little and gave you a look that made your heart flutter for a moment.

She drove away and you walked into your dorm where your two friends were. “Hey guys” you put your bag of clothes down and kicked your boots off.

“Well well well, look what the cat dragged in” Your friend Jade said to you.

“Yeah a bag of clothes Jade it isn’t a big deal” you replied tired of walking around “Turn around I’m changing”

Max and Jade turned around but still probed at the topic “But you were with the Regina George last night” Jade said.

“And you slept in her dorm” Max added, you changed into your comfortable pjs to lounge around in until 7 o’clock approached

“You can turn back around now” you said and they turned toward you arms crossed

“Details please” they both said and you sighed defeated.

“Promise me you won’t tell a soul” you put your pinkies out for them and the promised.

“Of course Y/N”

You sat on your bed and they sat across from you on Max’s bed, and you huffed out “Fine, she found me, we smoked a bong, and then we left, got an Uber to her dorm and we fucked” you sighed.

Max smiled “I would say sorry for losing you last night, but It seems like you had a great time without us” and pointed to your neck. You had completely forgot you had a hickey there and you were cherry red in the face. Jade and Max laughed at your obliviousness.

“But come on was it good?” Jade pressed.

You had grabbed a pillow and stuffed your mouth and nose into it “yes, she liked my tattoo” you said through the pillow.

“Does she like you? Was it a fling or does she want you again?”

“I don’t know, but she’s insinuated she wanted to fuck again” you mumbled.

Max and Jade high-fived each other “Y/N getting laid with the prettiest girl around” Max said teasing you.

Jade and Max were actually pretty sociable and had connections to parties, so when they got you as a roommate they took you on as their token introvert.

Jade laughed and added wiping away fake tears “They grow up so fast” You threw the pillow at them and their laughter only grew. Once they regained composure, Jade asked “There’s another party tonight, you coming with? Regina might be there” she waggled her eyebrows at you and you held up your middle finger.

“Actually, Regina invited me out to the party with her friends..” you grabbed the bag of clothes and took out the outfit Regina bought for you “that’s what this is for, she bought it for me”

They whooped and cheered, then Max spoke “She must really like you then Y/N” They paused and looked at your anxious face “Don’t sweat it, you’re gonna be hot shit tonight”

“I hope so” You ran your fingers through your hair.

7 o’clock approached faster than you expected, it was already 6:20 and you had gotten some notes done for a class. Then you started to change into the outfit Regina chose for you, you ripped off the tags and threw them in the recycling trashcan near the mirror, putting on your clothes. Max whistled when you turned to look at yourself in the mirror. “Regina has good taste”

“In clothes or people?” you asked, while putting your belt on

“Both Y/N” Max walked up to you and fixed your hair a little. You sat and bounced your knee anxiously “Breathe you already fucked her once you’ll be fine” you just felt silly, your outfit wasn’t too out of your comfort zone but you were scared again.

Max patted your shoulder. “You’re fine, you should wear that gold cross necklace you have, it’d look good with your outfit” you grabbed it and handed it to Max to clasp around your neck.

It was an indulgence purchase from months ago, you saw it and decided you needed it, it was actually expensive and real gold too. You were rather attracted to shiny things, and people like Regina.

Jade was absorbed in some video on her laptop and Max beckoned her “Jay look at them” She paused her video and looked at you.

“Wow go get ‘em tiger” Jade said jokingly, you rolled your eyes and cringed at her

“What are you my dad?” you grinned and then looked at your phone, “Ah shit I should head out now guys” You grabbed your small cross bag and slung it over your shoulder.

“We’ll see you at the party!” Max and Jade called out, you waved them goodbye. Then you walked to Regina’s dorm, it was about a 10-15 minute walk away and you texted her to let you into the building. You were only 3 minutes early.

Y/N: Hey Regina i’m outside, mind letting me in?

Regina G :0 : Be down in a sec

You didn’t wait long as she opened the door for you and led you back to her dorm. She didn’t look at you just yet, she was in a hurry to get back and finish getting ready. When she was finished getting ready, she stepped in front of the mirror and ensured her outfit looked good. She wore a pink shirt that complimented her breast well and black leggings and heeled boots. Then she turned around to you.

She hummed in approval and then you were red again. She traced the gold cross you wore. “Nice touch”. She grazed your arms which were nicely toned but not super muscular.

“Thank you” you stood awkwardly as she was staring at your outfit and your body. You avoided eye contact.

“Real gold?” she took the cross into her hands and looked at the fine details, you nodded. “Consider me impressed” you breathed out a sigh of relief only for her to pull you by your belt into a kiss. “You ready for this little wallflower?”

“Yeah” you said quietly.

She handed you her leather jacket “Hold this for me, don’t lose it” the she leaned over to apply her lipstick and walked back over to you pressing a few kiss marks to your cheek and neck. “Don’t wipe that off either” She pulled her phone out “Just waiting for Gretchen, Karen and Cady now”

——————————————————————————————

You left your bag at Regina’s since you assumed you’d come back for it anyway but took an unopened pack of Marlboros and a lighter and put it in Regina’s jacket. It was about 8 o’clock that you all left, Cady drove you all to the house party. Regina sat in the front leaving you with Gretchen and Karen in the back. You held Regina’s jacket in your lap.

Karen and Cady were the more amicable of the four in the car. Karen leaned and looked at your back "You've got tattoos Y/N" Suddenly Gretchen leaned over and looked at you.

"You do" She was also surprised "looks good on you"

You swore you saw Regina glance over at you raising an eyebrow, it screamed 'told you I was right nerd'.

Karen complimented your tattoos and asked many follow-up questions you weren't prepared for, but she leaned in and whispered "Regina likes them, she keeps staring at you through the mirror"

Before you could reply back thanks, Cady parked at the curb near the house where you could already hear music, the houses in this neighborhood were huge. Gretchen opened her door first hopping out, and let Karen out. Karen sent you a wink before shutting the door.

Regina led them to the door and opened it, all eyes were on her again. But since you walked in together it felt like they were on you. You all grabbed drinks before Karen and Gretchen dragged Cady to the dance floor. You grabbed some Jack and Coke and Regina just poured herself some Pink Whitney. “Hey Regina can I try some of yours?” you asked trying to loosen up before the alcohol kicked in.

“It’s vodka sweetie, aren’t you a lightweight?” you nodded She placed her cup down and picked up the bottle of Pink Whitney and a clean shot glass and poured you a shot, handing it to you “Bottoms up” You drank it and it burned on the way down but it was sweet and decadent much like Regina herself. She mouthed ‘Good pet’ and smirked then dragged you to the dance floor where you were already tipsy.

“Regina, can I wear your jacket for now so I don’t lose it?” you said loud enough for her to hear through the music and people, she nodded and continued to dance. Your bodies were close together and you were drunk. Alcohol was the best social lubricant.

You danced together and at some points she took your hand and let you spin her around. You had to extend your arms a little bit more than if you were her height and if she wasn’t wearing heels.

You turned your back for a little when you heard Jade and Max call after you and you greeted them, they said they saw you and Regina together and playfully punched your shoulder, and then heard Regina’s voice “Get off me weirdo!” you turned to see some frat guy with his arm wrapped around Regina’s waist.

“Dance with me” he slurred his words very drunkenly but he wouldn’t let go of Regina and she wiggled her way out of his grasp.

“I'm here with someone, get lost” Regina spat.

“Yeah where is he then huh?” The guy stepped up to her, this guy was easily almost a foot taller than you, but Regina didn’t care and she pulled your arm and you instinctively hooked your arm around the back of her waist.

You glared at him and Regina pulled your face towards hers kissing you in front of him and someone others watched, a shy little nobody that no one’s seen is kissing the Regina George. You were drunk and didn’t care, you were pissed this guy wouldn’t leave her alone. Your hand trailed down to her ass momentarily and you both broke the kiss.

He was about to say something else but Gretchen, Karen, and Cady showed up, “Leave her be, fucking jackss” he just scoffed as more people were watching and walked to another girl. You and Regina quickly let go of each other, you wiped off her lipstick from your lips.

Her friends were checking on her and she was just dusting her outfit off obviously irritated as well but she just kept saying she was fine. You were seething inside and chugged the rest of your cup but maintained composure “Regina you okay?”

She looked up at you and snapped “I’m fine Y/N” and she looked at her friends “I’m fine, gonna get more to drink” She stormed off and her friends just stood looking at each other but you weaved your way through the crowd following her.

“Regina” you put a hand on her shoulder, she poured more alcohol into her cup, and she ignored you “Regina let’s go outside for a second” You saw an open case of water and took one out. “Come on Regina please?”

She gave you a death stare but she found the backyard, opened the sliding door, and you followed her when you were alone she sneered at you “I’m fine seriously lay off it” You dare not take her alcohol but you handed her the bottle of water and she sat in a folding chair.

You took out the cigarettes and the lighter and then slipped the jacket off to place around Regina’s shoulders. You sat next to her and opened the pack of cigarettes, placed a piece of gum in your mouth so it wouldn’t taste bad, and lit the cigarette. She drank a third of the water you gave her.

“Smoke break?” you passed her the cigarette and smiled a little, she took it from you wordlessly. You just looked down at your phone and let her have her silence. You got a couple messages from Max and Jade including a picture of Regina and you from the 2nd floor window. You looked at Regina who was turned away from you and then you looked up behind where you saw your friends giving you thumbs up, you flipped them off quickly.

Regina passed the cigarette back to you and you took a long puff. Then she spoke “Men are such jack asses, ugh” she crossed her legs and complained, you listened. “Like get the fuck of of me” she rolled her eyes and then you flicked the ash off and passed the cigarette back to her.

She ranted on for a while before she turned back to you, and murmured a soft “Thanks though” she flicked the cigarette butt away but it landed toward your feet, you picked it up and stuffed it in your pocket to throw away later. Both of you were still thoroughly intoxicated so you felt like you could tease her a little bit.

You put a cigarette in your mouth used one hand to protect it from the wind and one hand lit it up, you took a long puff before smirking. “Regina George? Saying ‘thank you’? I can’t believe my ears” You passed her the cigarette again.

“Shut it nerd” She took a deep breath of the cigarette and blew it at your face. You were glad to see her back to her snarky teasing ways.

“Or what?” You challenged her with no intention of winning. “You gonna punish me, Regina?” You leaned back in your chair and spread your legs to get comfortable, but she stood up.

She walked in front of your chair and towered over you “It seems like that’s what you want” her knee pushed harshly between your thighs, one hand on the back of your chair and the other still holding the cigarette. She looked down at you and you smiled wider, knowing she was back in a better mood. “You better wipe that smug smile off your face L/N”

You tried leaning up to kiss her but she straightened herself out of your reach and shoved her knee harder into your cunt. You whined “Regina” You looked up at her and she held the cigarette to your mouth and watched you inhale, you turned your head to not blow the smoke at her. She looked at you expecting you to say or do something. You put your hands up in defeat “I’m sorry Gina please forgive me” You wanted a taste of her lips.

“Again” she said smiling down at you cruelly, and you swore she could feel the pulse between your legs.

“Regina please, I'm sorry I was joking, I’ll be good now” You put your hands down on your thighs and leaned forward again “Please kiss me”

Like yesterday, she breathed smoke into your mouth. Regina leaned down towards your lips and you inhaled what she gave you, and she pressed her lips to yours. She pulled away and said “You’re forgiven, I suppose”

“Thank you goddess” You smiled at her more timidly. She removed her knee from between your legs and finished off the last of the cigarette. Before she could flick it onto the ground somewhere, you put your hand out to take it from her.

“Oh a good Samaritan too aren’t you?” she taunted you and handed it to you to put in your pocket. She looked you up and down again her eyes lingering at your necklace, then she smirked “Well, God bless you baby” she said seductively, and started to walk away “Let's go back inside shall we?”

She walked ahead of you and you looked up at the window to see if your friends were still there, and they were. Jade mouthed to you ‘bottom’ and you rolled your eyes, then speed walked to catch up with Regina.

Regina got a message and then took your hand and led you upstairs, to a room with a pool table and in the corner, Gretchen, Karen, Cady, and Janis, with two guys you assumed were gonna go home with some of them tonight. They passed around a bong and Regina looked back at you and said quietly. “Hope I trained you well last night, or does my stray need help again?” She sat down next to Cady on the couch and you sat on Regina’s right.

Regina got her turn and then it was yours thankfully you did it right. You passed it around maybe three times and talked and didn’t get awkward or anything, when it was your turn again Regina leaned to whisper in your ear, “Let me know when you wanna go back to mine, I have a surprise” a hand lightly traced the back of your neck and you coughed out then she leaned away to talk to Cady.

You stayed a while, just chatting, and you were pretty sobered up, but you felt needier. You let Regina finish her conversation before tapping Regina’s arm and nodding your head. Then Regina stood up “Cady, me and nerd are heading home now, just gonna take an Uber” You and Regina said bye to everyone else and walked out. Walking out the door she interlaced her fingers with yours.

——————————————————————————————

Regina traced the inner part of your thigh in the car and you had to bite back a whine when she got too close to your core, and you returned the favor pulling her leg apart slightly as well. Your stomach filled with butterflies.

When you got to her dorm she took her jacket off and kissed you relentlessly, both of you kicking off your shoes. Regina undid your belt and slipped a hand underneath your underwear and felt how wet you were. “Been waiting all night for this pet?” she dragged her finger from your entrance to your clit and pressed lightly.

“Yes, I want you, please” you begged, she took her hand out and licked her finger clean.

“Strip for me and kneel in front of the bed, like yesterday” She commanded and you were happy to follow, you took your gold necklace off and placed it on the desk and rid the rest of your clothes. Her back was turned to you and you heard her opening something while you stripped and went on your knees.

“Hey Regina? Can I keep a shirt on?” she turned to you and you were in nothing but held her pink t-shirt you wore last night.

She was amused to see you wear her clothes “Yeah, sure” she went back to fumbling with something and you put the shirt on and stared at your knees.

When you glanced up at her, she wore only her shirt and lace panties now which made you blush and look at the ground, then you heard a clink of metal. Regina sat on the bed right in front of you, and you looked up and saw what she held. A pretty black collar with a tag on the front engraved with the words “Regina’s Pet” and a ring on the back and front of the collar for a leash or for her to tug on.

“Hey you sober right?” her voice was soft and caring, which surprised you.

“Yes, I am” you replied quietly you were eager.

“Do you want this around your neck?” Regina unclasped it and held it in front of you.

Your mouth went dry and you said “yes” weakly.

“Good” she leaned down and fastened the collar onto your neck. “You’re my pet now, yeah?” she hooked her finger through the loop on the front and pulled you close.

“Yes” is all you could manage to say as she beckoned you to straddle her lap. Your legs were spread as you sat on her and she inspected the collar on you.

“is it too tight?” she yanked on it a little and stuck two fingers between your neck and the collar.

“No- no, it’s good thank you” you were nervous again.

“You’re familiar with the color system, yes?” Regina asked.

You nodded “Green for good, yellow for slow down and red for stop”

“Good you’re gonna need it” She replied and kissed your lips

She let go of your collar and one hand was against your back and the other trailed up your thigh and pressed lightly on your clit. “So about you being a bit bratty earlier today..” she circled your clit gently and she stared into your eyes, “I think I have to discipline you a bit, yeah?”

You were willing to do anything she asked really, and said “Yes” She rewarded that answer with her moving pressing slightly harder, you ached wanting more “I’m sorry Regina, I’ll be good” she let out an approving hum.

“Tell me when you’re close baby, don’t finish unless I say so,” She said, “can you do that for me?”

“Yes” and she rewarded you by pressing against your clit faster “Ah, Jesus- Regina, it feels good” you moaned out and rested your head in the crook of her neck. “Faster please,” you begged needing more friction.

“God you’re so fucking pathetic” but she obliged and touched you faster. “You like when I call you pathetic baby?”

“Fuck, yes!” each thrum against your clit sent you closer and closer to orgasm, and you felt your stomach tighten and your legs trembled “Regina I’m close,” But as soon as you said that her fingers were off you and you whined “No.. please, let me come” your orgasm dissipated and your clit ached.

“Mm no” she responded back, “Lay down spread your legs” You climbed off her and spread your legs, and she lifted the shirt to reveal your wet cunt to her. You closed your legs when she stared, but she pried them back open. She started at your inner thigh and left kisses, marks, and bites all the way up to your pussy, where she licked a long stripe from your entrance to your clit. You arched your back wanting more.

She licked your clit gently at first and then harder, “Regina” you gasped out, and you bucked your hips into her face then she pushed them back down. You looked down and you saw her looking back at you while she ate your pussy out. She flicked her tongue across your clit and you said her name between moans and pants.

While her tongue abused your clit she gathered your slick around her fingers and slid two digits inside you, making you gasp. Pumping her fingers in and out hitting your g-spot your legs began to shake again “Fuck, I’m close. Please don’t stop mommy” But she pulled away leaving you on the edge again. She moved up and kissed you, tasting your wetness on her tongue.

“You’re doing so good for me, pet” She praised and kissed you again letting you rest before she edged you again. “Color?”

“Green” you replied, the ache between your legs hurt but it felt so good to be at the end of her wrath. Then she went back down to lick your clit again, slower this time wanting to draw out your agony a little bit.

She pulled away to look at your cunt “You have such a pretty pussy, you know that pet?” she then thrust two fingers back inside you before you could respond, curling them against your g-spot, your back arched again, making your collar clink slightly and she went back down to lick your clit again.

Her tongue slowly increased speed and pressure as she licked circles around the bud, her fingers still moving inside you. Suddenly she sucked on your clit and you almost fell over the edge “Wait! close- fuckk” you said to her and she stopped again, you didn’t want to come without her permission, you wanted to be good for her.

You were sexually frustrated, tears pricked at the corner of your eye and she took her clean hand and wiped them away “Does your pussy ache sweetie?” her tone was sadistic as she smiled. You just nodded and she cooed “My poor pet” you whined as she teased you. “One more time, can you handle it?”

You nodded eagerly and she lifted your shirt revealing your tummy and left marks down your stomach to your pussy once more, you involuntarily bucked your hips and she slammed your hips down against the mattress, she was stronger than she let on. She started licking once more and it drove you crazy, your clit was sensitive from the edging, she sucked on it occasionally. Then slid two fingers inside you again. “Regina” you drew out her name and she bit gently at your clit. “You feel so good..” then you were sure you could feel her smirk between your legs.

Your legs trembled again as she licked over your clit directly and relentlessly. A third finger stretched your pussy, and you moaned her name again and again. You pleaded “Regina please, please let me come, please” you whined out and looked down waiting for approval, but she just looked at you and sucked your clit hard. “Regina, please- fuck! I can’t, I can’t hold it, please I’m all yours please”

You were about to come crashing over the edge and then she lifted her head replacing her tongue with her thumb and she strummed your clit quickly “Go on baby, come for me” You almost screamed her name but she kissed you and muffled your sounds, she pulled away from the kiss.

The only words that came out of your mouth as you came was her name “thank you” and “don’t stop” She loved watching the scene before her. Her collared pet writhing and coming under her touch. Regina only stopped when you pushed her hand away, overstimulated.

She put her fingers in your mouth “Clean up your mess pet” you sat up and licked her fingers clean.

When you finished you kissed her hand and murmured “Thank you for letting me finish” she smiled and grabbed a water bottle from her table and held it to your mouth. Your mouth was dry from moaning her name so much.

“You okay there nerd?” she asked gently. She was worried she was too rough on you.

“I’m all good, my legs just feel like jelly” you gave a soft smile and she leaned down to kiss one of your legs. She smiled back at you.

“You up to return the favor?” she straddled your hips as she waited for your answer. You pulled her by the collar of her shirt like she’s done to you and kissed her.

You let her pull away and said “Of course” and she pulled her panties off.

She moved up so her pussy was right over your mouth, she was practically dripping “Be a good doll and make me feel good” She lowered herself onto your mouth and you greedily licked her pussy, you loved how she tasted and you grabbed her hips to put her full weight onto you.

She groaned and began to grind against your tongue, you guided her hips back and forth and she started to move her hips faster “Oh fuck Y/N” you saw her close her eyes. “You’re such a good fuck toy aren’t you?” you moaned at her words and it sent vibrations through her clit “Do that again baby, touch yourself while I ride you” You reached a hand down between your legs and moaned against her again. Your body was sensitive too and you moaned loudly at how overstimulated your clit was.

Your other hand now moved to her ass and you squeezed it digging your nails into her ass and pushing her further down into your face. “God, you’re so good at pleasing me” she gripped your hair and moaned “Don’t stop, please” she sounded desperate and who were you to deny her pleasure when she asked so nicely?

As she approached her orgasm you felt her legs start to squeeze your head a little, and you also got closer, thrumming your finger against your clit. “Fuck I’m close, are you close baby?” she looked down at you “Can you come with me?” you nodded and sucked her clit harder she moaned your name and streams of obscenities, “Fuck- baby” is what she got out before her back arched and she tilted her head back. You moaned into her as your orgasm followed quickly after. She rode your face prolonging her ecstasy as long as possible and then she lifted off you.

You wiped off your face a little before she kissed you again “You’re perfect” you got out between her kissing you.

She climbed off the bed and held her hand out to you, “Let's get cleaned up, how’s that sound?”

You just took her hand and followed her to the bathroom attached to her room. She turned the shower on and got rid of her shirt, then turned to you, undoing your collar. Then you also stripped your shirt off.

She was so sweet it actually caught you off guard. She let you into the shower and asked “You sure you’re okay?” then started to wash your hair.

“I’m way more than okay Regina” you looked up at her and she continued to wash your hair gently “Did you have fun?” You wondered.

“Mmhm, I rode your face and came all over it, of course, I had fun” She rinsed your hair and you began to soap her hair up as well. You turned her around washed the ends of her hair and kissed her shoulder. "I also enjoy making a mess out of you, I hope I wasn't too rough on you"

"You weren't, it felt amazing" you whispered and placed another kiss on her shoulder.

She took a washcloth and washed her own body. Then turned you around, Regina started to lightly wash your back and shoulders "You're so cute" you heard her say quietly, while she washed the rest of the suds away.

When you hopped out of the shower she handed you a towel and you dried yourself off. You wrapped the towel around yourself and followed her back to the room where she got you clean clothes once again.

Instead of crawling into bed right away, Regina was seated on the edge of her bed and actually patted the empty space next to her, you sat next to her “I want to be very clear to you” her voice was serious with an air of worry to it.

Suddenly you felt like you did something wrong and apologized “Shit Regina did I do something wro-“

She cut you off “No! no, you didn’t,” she said quickly “Just listen okay?” Regina was nervous, and you knew she didn’t like to feel coddled but you grabbed her hand trying to support her and she let you. “I like you Y/N, not just to fuck or for homework” Your jaw dropped and she got defensive. “We don’t have to do this-“

“Regina, you like me like…” you paused to breathe “Crush like me?” you gripped her hand tighter hoping you interpreted that right.

“What other kind of ‘like’ is there for a confession, dumbass” she was rude and then apologetic “Sorry” you just laughed.

“You’re fine Regina, I can take when you’re mean to me” and brought your hand up to your lips and kissed it gently “But why? You have so many other people lined up for you other than me, and I’m like, socially awkward and weird”

“The awkwardness is a little charming” She claimed. “You were also hard to read at first, so quiet too. Like a little mouse”

You smiled "Glad you think so" and you kissed her hand again “You’re a little scary Regina”

“I know it’s a blessing and a curse” She just smiled back at you.

You stared at your intertwined hands “I didn’t know you liked me, like that” you bit your tongue “I thought you were just kidding, I’m kind of slow, aren’t I?”

“A bit,” she smiled “It’s okay loser, I know I send mixed signals sometimes, but I was flirting with you all those times before yesterday just so you know” Shit you were really slow.

You leaned in and kissed her “I like you a lot” You broke the kiss and looked into her eyes. You opened your mouth to say, ‘Please be mine’, but nothing came out.

Regina still looked a little nervous "I meant what I said you know, you're mine" She said possessively, she paused and was about to say something else but you cut in.

"I want you Regina, and I want to be yours as well." You declared

She poked fun at your statement "You're so cheesy" and pushed you away slightly and playfully. "Just get in the bed" You stood and lifted the covers and climbed in and let her in as well.

You laid on your back and she was on her side, she looked at you like she was admiring your features. Then you turned to ogle in realization, dumbfounded, "Wait you're my girlfriend now right?"

She flicked your forehead earning an "Ow" from you. She rolled her eyes "Yes loser, and for someone so smart, you're kinda dumbass too"

You grinned wide, "Your dumbass though right?"

The corners of her lips tugged up slightly, showing she enjoyed your small cheesy banter with her "Shut up"

"Fiiine" You inched closer to her and kissed her passionately, "Goodnight Regina" She turned over and you instinctively wrapped your arms around her.

"Goodnight nerd" she said tiredly.

You smirked and mumbled quietly "Your nerd" and you just heard a tsk sound and fell asleep with this beautiful goddess in your arms.

(sorry the bong thing might be a little corny, but the first time i used one, my girlfriend held it for me because i was scared of dropping it)

(heyyyy just wanted to add here at the bottom, that i moved really fast with all the kinky shit and collar stuff. this isn’t a perfect representation of bdsm, so please do your research! [I might rewrite a version of this over on ao3 to be longer so i can better portray that stuff realistically {also it’s because i feel bad}])

[luckykiwiii101]

Okay this is outrageously easy. The way I overcomplicated everything is ummm embarrassing but we move…

So I just really thought and took in that I don't have to put anything on a pedestal and tire myself out I should just stick to that “idc” mindset I have. I was manifesting waking up in the void since I wanted to experience it (and probably manifest my dream life through it) and I was like it's literally nothing, not that deep. Before I would affirm and vaunt many times, visualise and I’d experience that feeling of fulfilment and knowing multiple times until it felt natural. Then yesterday I basically just left it all alone since I already did everything (even when I didn't have to) so it's basically inevitable for me to get what i want, there’s no point in doing anything more now (also methods made me feel like i was struggling to “get” and i didn’t like that). Anyway last night I woke up in the void (by literally falling asleep normally) and I didn't even freak out or anything I was just like "hm okay". I affirmed that I manifest things I want extremely fast and I wake up in the void every night, after I just chilled there for a bit.

I came across this post on how to make your desires feel natural to you i forgot who it was and I honestly can’t be asked finding it but it said to think of it this way. Let’s say many people want a certain feature you have like your eye colour or hair type/texture and they really want it, they even get hella excited or happy thinking about having it. But when you actually take the time to think about that feature you don't even give much of a reaction like you don't care as much that's cus you already have it, it's always been yours. I know I'm repeating what everyone has said and that's because that's literally all there is to say honestly. So being on tumblr scavenging for answers isn't doing anything really. everyone will just repeat the same thing but phrased differently to help people understand better and some people will get mad about them repeating themselves like….. yeah..? that's basically the answer to all your questions.

You think you’re “waiting” to “get” your desires but like it’s the other way round, your desires are waiting for you to wake up and accept that they’re already yours

So it's all just crickets and tumbleweed, if you're just sitting there questioning why you, apparently, don't have your desires. Imagine your desires are just awkwardly watching you ignoring the fact that you already have them and they’re right there in front of you. They’re probably just looking to the left and right, scratching their head. it's especially awkward when you're looking at the 3D for answers when it's literally useless and doesn't do shit, it only reflects old circumstances. That can only change when you turn to yourself or the 4D for answers, and of course any method will help but then again it all comes down to you to decide if it works. If you "want" your desires don’t dismiss what it is that "gets" you them...idk how to phrase it but just start applying and persist it's honestly too easy.

Anyway enough from me, I'm finally deleting this app right after this. This was long sorry if it doesn't make sense but this is how I understood it. To summarise you're all that's left to"getting" your desires. Think of it as having a breakdown over not being able to find your glasses or hair tie but turns out you're wearing it the entire time.

Thank you Wii and all the other bloggers who take the time out of their day to help others with all of this. Take care of yourselves!!

THIS IS AMAZING!!! I’m SO proud of you!! SOMEONE WHO ACTUALLY APPLIED WHAT THEY KNEW AND NOW LOOK AT THEM!! you deserve this so much honestly i’m beyond happy for you!

Also i REALLY love the way you put yourself on the pedestal by saying that your desires are waiting for YOU and not the other way round.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for "causing" someone's ED? (massive TW obviously)

so i (18x) have a pr0ana sideblog. i say this in the LOOSEST sense of the term; while i interact with pr0ana tags and content, i don't make any myself, and my "platform" is nonexistent. i primarily use the blog as a way to feel less alone since i can't talk about my ED in real life. it's a vent blog. i don't have the name of my sideblog anywhere on my main blog, and vice versa.

a few weeks ago, my good friend (18x) found this sideblog and decided not to tell me. over the next few weeks, we had several conversations about my ED and their dysmorphia (though according to them not a full-fledged ED), all started by them. at one point i promised them that i would try to get just a little better every day, and i do! i do try that constantly! but about ten minutes after saying that i posted something on my sideblog about how paranoid i was about calories or whatever, because yeah i'm trying to get better, but that doesn't mean i magically stop struggling. i also told them i was NOT on pr0ana tumblr or interacting with that sort of content, because i wasn't comfortable sharing that about myself. i didn't know my friend knew about the sideblog at this point.

they dmed me a while after this post to ask why i had lied to their face, or as they put it in a vaguepost on their blog, "made a promise and then turned around and immediately broken it." i got very very frustrated, since i think what i do on the internet is my business, as is my mental health. this definitely reflected in my tone, so i think i was definitely TA, at least initially.

during this conversation, though, they basically said that i needed to talk to them about my emotions and stop hiding them, and that i had to take the hand they were extending. here's where the main problem started. they then said that they considered contacting my mother or friends but decided in the long run it wouldn't be beneficial. my mother is emotionally abusive, which this friend knew, and would absolutely involuntarily hospitalize me if contacted about my ED.

i became extremely angry, both that my friend would have my mother's and friends' contact information in the first place (we met through tumblr and have only met in person ONCE -- i do not, clearly, have their parents' contact information or even their names, and this was not information i volunteered to them) and that they would use it as an ultimatum. at this point i became extremely furious and basically told them to leave me alone because no one who genuinely cared about me would do that, and i didn't understand why my mental illness was seen as something i HAD to overcome if i wanted to avoid getting literally hospitalized by my mother. at this point they told me that i was refusing to accept help and that i was "aestheticizing killing myself." they then blocked me. i was still fucking angry. i never blocked them from my main, but i did block all their accounts from my sideblog and change the url.

they later unblocked me and we tried to remain civil. we never stopped interacting with each other's posts or whatever. they initiated contact a few times, which i ignored. the first instance they initiated contact was sending me a poem they'd written about the situation, which made me feel like shit, and the second time was just saying "hey." i didn't respond either time because i didn't know how.

i saw a vaguepost that they made on their blog yesterday that basically said they were fucking angry that, after an entire lifetime of struggling to avoid developing an ED, the "person they used to be in love with" was the reason they were developing one. it was clearly about me and i felt a rush of shame so overwhelming that i didn't really know what to do with it. i dmed them to tell them that i loved them and i was sorry, that i didn't mean to hurt them, and that i didn't want things to end like they did. reading back over the message now, it feels very "woe is me" (i was crying while writing it), but basically it just involved me apologizing a million times.

i woke up this morning to their response, which was: "are you saying this because you miss me or because you don't have anyone else left? i don't want to be your last choice." i hadn't gone into the conversation with the intention of regaining their close friendship because, frankly, i don't want that. i hadn't gone into it with a goal in mind. a problem i've had with this friend in the past is that they seem to view a lot of interactions and relationships as almost transactional in a way that i don't (demonstrated by their insistence that i had to talk them about my mental health in the first place). i told them this, and told them i just wanted to apologize and that i loved them. they said that they were sorry, too, but that the timing made them "suspicious," i assume because they know i've been extremely depressed and lonely lately (i just moved to college without any of my best friends and have been making vent posts about it on my main personal blog).

i know it wasn't the intention, but it made me feel like they were using my mental illness against me yet AGAIN, and i stopped apologizing. as i'm typing this i'm trying to decide whether to block them. but i feel like shit about the whole thing, because i was responsible for the formation of their ED, and i feel like i should be able to handle whatever anger they have towards me for that without getting my feelings hurt and being petty. i don't know. AITA?

What are these acronyms?

[chaisshitposts]

Heyaa aff tape anon here😂😂.. Plz just call me Charlie it's my name.. Aff tape anon sounds weird and the question you asked me

1) I only manifest that i manifest my desires instantly out of thin air.

And second I wake up in the void every nyt being fully aware..

These two were my exact affirmations. Now I manifest almost instantly.. I won't say instantly exactly but ya very fast. For example yesterday nyt only I affirm I have 10000 rupees in my account.. And after like 10-12 mins I got them from my father without even asking.

And now how the void feels.. It was like I was just expanding like anything for few seconds (also I felt warm I don't know if any one feels like that too )than everything was so calm that you will barely remember you have to affirm that's why I used aware in my tape so yeah but it feels heaven specially if you want to relax. .

2) I also read someone ask me to manifest them for waking up in the void. I can surely do that but everytime any other people wants to do that it barely works bcoz people won't assume they will actually wake up there bcoz it's their reality.

Still I will just affirm tonight all chai followers will wake up in the void tonight. Hope it works 🤞🤞🤞

Bye sorry fir long post but i will just say get off tumblr Or any other social site where you can read about loa bcoz you will find something new daily and you want to try it, you will lose your previous progress.. I have been there so i know how desperately you want to achieve the void.

And i did exactly that.. I get off twitter and tumblr and just affirm , listening to my tape and doing psych-k.. That's it

Before sleeping even if you don't get the feeling just affirm you will wake up in the void aware. Bcoz sats freaking work even if you are noob in that.

Haash i'm tired now, all the best.

Happy instant manifesting.

aH okay, apologies, glad to make your acquaintance, charlie !!! and thank you for answering, I really appreciate your words of encouragement/tips as well as manifesting for the others even though you didn't have to. also thanks for comin' to check up on questions that may be asked from other anons, I bet you're busy enjoying yourself! rest well and I hope you have lots and lots of fun!!!

i lowkey feel like asking questions to anons living their dream lives is so inconveniencing not gonna lie

[p-redux]

So, more info from Hyrox Glasgow 2024! Again, thanks Team for all the DMs, I really appreciate you! ❤️

Reminder of what I posted yesterday.

And

So, today, I get this video of Sarah Holden competing at Hyrox Glasgow, and you can CLEARLY hear Sam Heughan cheering her on. Sam's voice is at the very end. At the beginning, you hear a man with a thick Glasgow accent pronouncing Sarah's name Serah. That's NOT Sam. There's also a woman's voice. And at the END of the video, you can hear Sam's unmistakable "C'mon, Sarah!" This was shared by one of the Team and I saved it to my YouTube Channel. Enjoy!👇

I also received this DM with additional info. 👇 Posted with permission.

Here's the pic where Sam is tagged. 👇

And Sarah posting she got FOMO aka Fear Of Missing Out and spontaneously competed today in the women's open race. 👇 She definitely matches Sam's energy level! I'm tired just looking at her. 😊

Anyhoooo, I also got some conflicting info regarding whether Sam competed yesterday after all. I was alerted to this Tweet. 👇

And then I received this DM from someone I've never talked to. 👇

It's all very confusing. On the one hand, it is weird that if Sam competed, he never posted anything on his own IG. On the other hand, Hyrox DID post his results as if he DID compete yesterday. 👇

If Sam decided to not compete and wanted to give his slot to someone else, why wouldn't Hyrox be able to substitute the other man's name? Everything is computerized, so I don't see why they couldn't have made the change easily. Also, isn't it fraudulent to post results with Sam Heughan's name if he wasn't the one competing?

On the flip side, if Sam didn't actually compete, then he literally went to Hyrox to watch Sarah! Those saying "No, he went to watch his friend, Valbo. who also competed." Yeah, except Valbo didn't compete until 6:00 PM yesterday, and Sam was there at 12:00 PM, when the women's competitions started. Literally RIGHT THERE where Sarah was competing. 👇

No reason for Sam to be there 6 HOURS before Valbo was competing if he only went to support Valbo. 🤷‍♀️

I ran out of room to post pics since Tumblr limits to 10 pics, but I also got a DM saying Sam got a bunch of new Instagram follows who are Sarah Holden fans. That leads me to think they went to follow him because they saw him with Sarah at Hyrox.

So, that's it for now. I'm in the process of vetting someone from the Glasgowish area who approached me with some Sam and Sarah info. If she and the info check out, then I'll post it.

PS. I'm hearing from people that my usual haters and assorted newish haters are gnashing their teeth about my #samarah posts...same as it ever was. This has happened any time I've ever posted about Sam possibly dating someone. If you look at my track record for the last 10 years, my info has been at least 90% accurate. No one in the Outlander fandom would have known about Cait and Tony, and Sam and Cody, Abbie, Mackenzie, etc if not for my INSIDER source info, and me posting it FIRST. Facts, people. So, the hate makes no never mind to me. I keep doing me. I'm here for those who want the info. If that's not you, go somewhere else. Simple as that.

Oh, one more thing...the LIE that I have a restraining order against me from Sam resurfaced in my Inbox. Let's use our brains once in our lifetime, shall we? If I had a restraining order or a cease and desist, I wouldn't still be here, now would I? Doh. 🤦‍♀️ My blog is just like any celebrity news blog. It's called freedom of speech, peeps. And in the USA people have died to protect this right. That's all, folks.

[greensagephase]

what made you wanna name the story non-violent communication?

Hiii, nonnie!! Thank you so much for the ask (and also, I'm sorry for the delayed reply! I took off tumblr yesterday)!! 🥰 Thank you for asking this question because I don't think I've ever talked about it before!!

Long story short:

THIS SONG RIGHT HERE!!!!!!!!! 🗣🗣🗣🗣 If you haven't listened to it, pls do!!😭It's one of Miguel's songs and has part of his dialogue at the end of the song before it transitions to "Givin' up (Not The One)" in the album!!! The transition is (in my humble opinion) ✨😭✨😭✨ !!!

If it has a million fans, I'm one of them. If it has one fan, I'm THAT FAN. If it has zero fans, it means I'm no longer on this Earth!!! 😤

This is my fav song from the album!! I'll explain why below the cut! I'm going to give a short (lol, I yapped too much, I gave a whole story time) explanation because I love this song sm 😭 so if you care to read a bit of an analysis on the songs, then proceed, if not, pls disregard the rest lol and thank you for sending this ask!!!

So I first heard the song a day or two before I posted the first chapter to NC, which was late July 2023. I watched the movie in June but I only listened to the songs that I really, really liked (I love all the songs but some a little more than others) that were included in the movie without listening to the full album, so I hadn't listened to this song because Miguel's songs (this one and "Givin' Up (Not The One)") are not included in the film. I only found out about "Givin' Up (Not The One)" because it was all over tiktok lol

So yeah, I listened to the song for the first time a day or two before the first chapter was posted and fun fact, the first chapter I posted for NC was actually nameless lmao!!😭😭 I didn’t know what to title it (I’ve always been bad with titles), so it was just a writing post with no title. I didn't think much of it either because my og plans were for the story to be like 3-4 chapters total (past me would've been shocked I'm still going with the story and that we're 249k ish words in just from the main parts of the story, not counting the one-shots lol).

As I mentioned, I hadn’t heard the entire album yet but after part 1 was posted, I sat down and FINALLY listened to the entire album to appreciate it (I've since then listened to the entire album like a hundred times (Metro Boomin was my #1 artist of 2023💀)) and once I listened to it in order, I immediately knew I wanted to title my fic Nonviolent Communication. 🥹❤️

When I heard both of Miguel’s songs right after the other it made something in my brain click.

I felt like it was so, so fitting for what I was trying to achieve with my story, even when I was planning to make the story like 4 chapters long lol.

So my explanation for connecting the song to my fic:

I'm probably going to sound crazy, or like someone who gave the song too much thought but hear me out.

In a way, I felt (and ofc everyone is going to find a different vibe, feeling, or meaning to a song but this was mine) like it was kind of ironic how "Nonviolent Communication" didn't receive much attention like his other song, "Givin' Up (Not The One)" did, which is more... out there (???). It's more like !!!! You know? Like the lyrics themselves and the production are more bold and strong, more “rough” for lack of a better word. Despite it not being in the film like "NC", everyone knows it! Everyone also knows Miguel's dialogue because of it, "But I'm not like the others..." and so on along with his little quote about "being Spider-Man is a sacrifice" at the end of the song.

Then, you have "Nonviolent Communication." It's the second song with the least plays on the album on Spotify (after "Nas" which is another one of my top fav songs from the album), and the lyrics and production are an entire different vibe from the other song!! It's so much more softer and vulnerable, even slower.

You let me fall first, then you dream awake I'd do anything to bring you to that other place We speak so differently alone, love like Vincent we are low Watch for constellations, soft as cloud formations That will never leave, much as duty calls If I'm in over my head, I'll swim Niagara Falls

It still has themes of being Spider-Man but it's not so !!!! like the other song is. It's truly so much more vulnerable and soft, and even has romantic themes included. And at the end of the song we have another part of Miguel's dialogue, that's often disregarded, included, "I'm this dimension's one and only, Spider-Man... At least I was," which I'm always !!!! about because one, his tone for that part is much softer (almost sad), and two, I feel like him no longer being the only Spider-Man in his own dimension goes along with him not feeling like a true Spider-Man, and no longer having this one thing to himself that he can have in common with other spider members.

I could go on about this but this is already so long 😭 but anyway, I think that part is usually disregarded, much like Miguel’s soft side that we don’t get to see a lot of in the film. We’re given very little of soft Miguel and the majority is him being angry, stressed out, scared, and frustrated (rightfully so) with what’s happening.

So, hearing both songs, I felt like they represent two sides of Miguel. One that is more direct, bold, and rough, maybe even “violent.” It’s the side that’s most known to probably all the spider people and fans alike. Some people only see Miguel as an angry man that’s determined to protect the multiverse and sacrifice anything, since he’s already given up so much.

But then there’s the side of him less known (less seen), one that we didn’t see much of but that many of us picked up on. He has a soft side despite being through a lot, and has a lot of love and care to give. He’s a man that’s capable of having nonviolent communication, someone who can fall first, speak differently with someone when he’s alone with them, and be willing to do anything to “bring” that person “to the other place” - while still being Spider-Man and sticking to his duty that comes with such title but not sacrificing those very things.

So yeah, I heard the songs and it just clicked. “Nonviolent Communication” to me is the soft side of Miguel that we don’t get to see much in ATSV, but it’s still there. And so, I decided that it was the perfect title for my fic because of my interpretation of the song and my goal with the fic: show Miguel’s soft and vulnerable side that I so desperately hope we get to see more of in BTSV (I am begging the writers to do Miguel justice!!!!!!!).

I hope this made sense, maybe as I mentioned earlier, I’ve given too much thought to this (I’m an overthinker) but that’s my version and I love the song SO MUCHH!!! It was my most heard song in 2023, so I guess that says a lot :)

If you read this far, thank you so much!! I definitely talked too much but I seriously love Miggy and this song so much and I always get so emotional listening to it lmao 😭 but yeah, thank you for the ask, nonnie!!! I hope you're having a great day/night!!!🥺🥰

-Alondra❤️

[sgiandubh]

https://www.tumblr.com/bootsaucepunk/749452398271037441/so-cbs-issue-of-reserved-mag-made-into-a?source=share There are a lot of different weights and measures around here, but this one definitely rocks. The expensive and innocuous magazine is criticized even by C's stans, but now it becomes a fashionable item because it was donated to charity. Caitrìona didn't even have any direct involvement in this, for God's sake! This week we had very harsh criticism of the program led by Sam (who, by the way, effectively establishes relationships with the benefiting institutions) and a lot of mockery for the birthday fundraiser led by Tash...

Dear Weights and Measures Anon,

Ah, you mean the Barbour Idiot, who had no idea about Eastern Europe and felt too cool for school to ask or research, right? For the record, here: https://www.tumblr.com/sgiandubh/740235847510654976/when-you-do-not-know-a-thing-about-the-issue-at. A prime example of intercontinental blindness: North Americans thinking they know better than the people who live there, just because they are North Americans. Don't get me wrong: I am a lover and keen connoisseur of Americana, but this particular mentality clique always gets on my nerves. It is idiotic and gratuitous, and even more so when disguised in empty, demagogic right-mindedness.

This particular blogger is one of the most vulgar, nasty and cruel people on Tumblr, ever. Also a liar and a superficial twat - is it so hard to double check the things you are posting, for factual accuracy, before hitting that post now button?

Let's see what the whole hysteria is about, now:

First lie: the Reserved mag issue was 'made into a hardcover book for charity with her autograph'. It was not. Aside the cult and borderline obsessive following & interest she enjoys, courtesy of the OL fandom and (as far as obsessive stretches, all the way to Kamchatka and back) of her disturbed Stans, she is not that well known. Stop lying just to make her more important than she is, you are not helping her at all.

Turning a magazine into a yearly book format was Reserved's editorial team marketing choice, as I explained in my last post on that issue. It has nothing to do with Caitriona Mary Balfe and her 2020 photoshoot for Ellen von Unwerth, a slim part of that particular Reserved volume.

Here is the official statement, one last time, for the vulgar freak in the back:

See? Nothing to do with her.

Second lie: CMB was directly involved in that charity event. She was not and never meant to. One more time, she has nothing to do with the event and just shared the story on her IG account, knowing full well it will stir ahem... interest. Yeah, interest is best, in this context.

One more time, for the idiot in the back:

The copy was donated by the redhead Reserved editor-in-chief, Jules Wood. I explained it yesterday, Anon.

Pitching S against C is the clinical side of the Disgruntled Tumblrettes' pure hatred of that man who dared not to sleep with them. Sorry to be blunt: sometimes, a cat is a cat. The Gay Charade is just a sophisticated, Munchhausen-level theory for the parochial racists and homophobes of 'Murica, primarily.

Think I went too far? How about this post from the same nasty individual?

The 'trans fucking weirdo' was an unneeded, yet revealing detail, for a weirdo is a weirdo, no matter their gender orientation.

What a Fascist clown.

[Later edit]: what the heck ever happened to The Sparkly (Sparkling?) Lounge Manager? Dish it out, Anon, I am far from being ubiquitous. Thanks.

[mario-art]

HELLO, you made such an interesting point in the tags of my post:

You know what’s funny? Is that Thrawn is really being turned into a “Machiavellian” type of villain, but what’s even funnier is that Machiavelli himself received this type of treatment. Now idk how much familiar you are with the 16th century author, but just know this: Machiavelli and “Machiavellian”, and whatever people can take from him, is heavily misunderstood (I actually really hate the use of the adjective, but perhaps that’s a story for another type). Now I know that Zahn wrote Thrawn based on a certain extent on the Machiavelli archetype (I remember reading it somewhere, pardon if I have no proofs), but I’m actually laughing hard thinking that as characters they are having the same treatment by popular media. Lemme explain: Machiavelli wrote the Principe not because “oh he cynic!1!🥶He mad!1🤬”. No. Machiavelli wrote what he wrote because he wanted to save Italy dalla Ruina, from its ruin. Machiavelli dreamed of a more compact and unified Italy. He had a vision and just as much as Thrawn, he wished to serve his people, Florence (in Thrawn’s case, the ascendancy) and Italy (which didn’t existed at the time).

And now, with Thrawn being reduced as you said in a villan without complex motifs, I can’t help but think how poetic is to be doomed to the same narrative as the figure who inspired your existence. Maybe this was planned all along, I don’t think so personally, but Thrawn is being oversimplified by Filoni the same way Machiavelli gets reduced as just a “pragmatic person” and “the ends justify the means” by everyone (don’t let me start on how wrong the quote is).

To sum up: Thrawn and Machiavellian are rhyming in the same direction in popular mainstream media.

This was my Ted talk, sorry in advance for possible writing mistakes, I just woke up✌️

Hiii! Thank you so much for the spontaneous Ted talk 😄😄 Your parallel between the Ascendancy and Florence+Italy is sooo on point, it blew my mind for a second. Now I have to delve deeper into it

Actually there was a period of time when I was really invested in this topic, I read his 10 letters, history of Florence +the Prince obviously and almost fell from a chair when they put him into Assassins Creed game, but now there're just small bits that I remember. Maybe it's time to refresh things

I didn't know that Zahn was actually inspired by Machiavelli. I'm new to this part of the fandom, so I haven't read anything about him or his working process, but after you mentioned it I'll take a note for the future. I must confess I learned who Thrawn was only during the Ahsoka show and due to the fandom. Like there were so many memes about him here on Tumblr, there's no way fans will hype some basic dude so much. And then my friend recommended the new trilogy

So yeah, it's such a pity that not 1, but 6 books of new material got completely ignored and the character simplified to what we've already seen so many times literally everywhere. You phrased it beautifully

I haven't read the old trilogy yet, heir to the empire, only know the plot in general, but I'm curious what exactly motivates Thrawn to rebuild the empire. And how the characterization of him differs between these trilogies. Is he mostly the same or did Zahn change the character after so many years like Terry Pratchett's Vetinari evolved from the very first version of the Patrician to his later works (I can't help comparing them after yesterday, though I hadn't done it before idk)

So yeaah... At least I'm happy that there're so many talented fans here and we can happily ignore whatever happens on the screen 🙃

[dana-chan-the-control-brain]

Thanks for your response. I was the anon who ended the ask with 'the fandom can suck it'. When I saw that anon who you and twinanimatronics had assumed to be the one that keeps you know starting shit with you, I really hated that they labeled us as shipbrain or whatever they said. I am aroace who finds comfort in shipping characters and that doesn't make me any less aroace. Can't people like them just let us have this, let us share it and stop taping our mouths? God. We are not even hurting anyone. I posted a solarxmoon and solarxearth mini comic thing yesterday and behold, I believe that same anon found it and is looking adamantly through the solarxmoon and even solarxearth because I didn't use the tsams tag for my comic. I took the comic down fast and turned off anon messages so quick because God that anon was quick to leave nasty messages, six in total and that was panic attack inducing. I'm sorry for rambling about this. I don't know anyone else who got that same anon on their back. It looks like they are persistent for lack of better term and it annoys me+scares me. Can't even share things I like about here anymore. Hoping solarxmoon becomes canon so that anon can shut up already

If Solar Moon became canon, they don't even need to change anything.

The actors don't even need to pretend to kiss or be romanically involved at all.

It's literally as simple as "Oh yeah, we were dating for months, anyway..."

OH AND... FUCK THAT ANON. I know the user you are talking about, I think there's around two or three of them... and it seems like they're dead set on hunting down people who use that Solarmoon or Solar x Moon tag.

Going into popular users in the tsams fandom that I personally don't know... and spreading bad lies and rumors about me.

Like, they typically try to keep it as vague as possible, like "oh I am not talking about dana-chan-the-control-brain specifically....." but they often steal the exact wording and turn of phrase I use.

Cause I have an overly wordy way of talking on the internet.

I've always been this way since I was 15, so I feel my style of speaking is pretty overly wordy, rambly and long compared to most people just because I don't have a lot to share with my opinions with in real life. And I also misspell things a lot cus spellcheck has gotten worse since it became AI trained and it doesn't help my dyslexia.

But how sad is that? That someone is searching out the tag for a ship that they don't like, claim that "it's everywhere" and I'm "poisoning the fanbase" when I'm just.... here... playing with my own dolls, doing my own thing.... and not bothering anyone... Not even putting the ship in the tags publicly because I have Such respect and love for the silly little youtube show, who also plays with fnaf characters like they're dolls.

(just saying.. "bio-organic" and interdimensional travel did NOT come from fnaf I can tell you that much. )

And yeah, if they're really stumbling across Solarmoon or these ships on accident.......Blacklist the tags and move on? Don't come to my messages... Don't harass my friends...

And don't harass other people I DON'T EVEN KNOW because someone just said "hehe but what if they kissed" on the internet?

Like blocklist the tag, and move on.

I know the blocklisting tagging system sucks sometimes, so maybe it's picking up "Solar" like in that case? Just scroll super fast and don't look at it?

And yeah. You don't deserve those nasty messages sent your way at all!

Oh, and if you feel brave enough to reupload your art to tumblr and DM me, I will gladly reblog it here. <3

[maxcuntstappen]

heyoheyo quick question i just started getting into f1. this race is the first i watched live while lurking on the tag here and is it always like this? the amount of hateful posts and anti this anti that stuff I've seen is crazy. i know it's sport and everythings competitive but im in other sport fandoms here and the atmosphere is much nicer when cheering for and respecting all athletes with the mutuals.

so yeah i guess i just wanna know if this is always the vibe before getting involved further. which would be sad cause the athletes and racing is very fun

hi anon <3 first of all, i'm so fucking sorry that this was ur first experience live blogging during a race. yest was a toxic whirlwind and i, despite having been part of f1blr for a bit, was quite downtrodden and mad about it.

i will say this. i personally believe it's not as bad as it was yesterday.

there are many reasons for this i think. to begin with, it was the first race of the season effect. everyone's been waiting n dying to see their fav on track and to have a good result and we also didn't really know how the teams would perform. so a lot of expectation -> a lot of disappointment -> mean things on tumblr.

people often find it easier to blame another driver than a whole ass team cause it's easier to direct the anger at a person than a concept which i think is what happened yesterday with multiple drivers.

it's not usually this bad.

but.

it is often quite bad. definitely worse than other fandoms.

i do think the racing makes up for it and that's why i've still stuck around.

ella and i were talking about it and the takes are definitely at its worse during the race and two hours after it.

once we pass that wave, things tend to calm down and we enter the funny text posts territory.

but if you do want to live post/scroll through it, i would stick to my own dash and avoid the main tags.

tumblr gives us the privilege of careful curation and i use that shit everyday. like i will check the bio and do a quick scroll thru each blog i follow.

i also have multiple tags (n blogs) blocked.

there are several people on f1blr who post amazing content and are so on top of updates. but they can be really mean in their phrasing. i don't follow them or block them cause i know that their content will reach my dash through my mutuals but their hot takes won't (especially the text posts where people rant in their tags, those tend to be the meanest).

despite all this, yesterday i spent a good amount of time unfollowing some mutuals. but as i said, i really do believe that f1blr was at its worst then.

there are definitely some blogs that are neutral/nice about the drivers/teams they don't support. these are some of my favourites;

@epylonia @cooali @liamlawsonlesbian @jussst-lurking

i know i have answered ur simple yes/no question with a WikiHow article but i really do hope that bits of it can be helpful to u and that if ur online n scrolling thru jeddah, u see more fun takes than hurtful ones

[bookishtheaterlover7]

Albitch Ring Rant Post Part 2

Since I'm in a bad mood for whatever fucking reason, also Tumblr won't let me post Princess's ask, that's an actual cold hard truth, Imma do this instead 😁

And we already sound crazy already. So, let's drag this pretentious slut again, shall we..? Oh, and special thanks to 👸 for being bored, and once again bringing me stuff to fucking destroy this bitch with 🫶

So, remember when the timeline they made didn't make sense? Yeah, it'll continue to do so. Because her fan page posted this, four days ago.

Now, I don't really care what this bitch does, as long as she doesn't make Chris look bad, in which case... LEMME AT HER!!! But if this is July 2020... Chris ain't there with her at all. Considering he was with Lily James in London! Remember that? Seemed like forever ago 😅

So, if they're claiming something about the timeline in July 2020... They're fucking lying 🙄 again

Let's travel a little forward in time to yesterday 😁

So, we all saw Albitch rocking the dullest and most cheap ass ring you've ever seen, right? It gets worse much worse.

Justin LD(lyme diseased) posted a shit ton of pics with Albitch. And that ring honestly looks even duller and pathetic in those, more than anything.

And we all know Albitch and Chris have zero chemistry whatsoever, props goes to the top comment on the post because it's so true, and sparked my belief that the bitch is sleeping with Justin 🤭

And I honestly agree with the commenter at the top. They do look good together.

They both look equally perfectly AWFUL on the red carpet 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

WTF is with the head tilt?! It stopped being cute 3000 articles ago, Albitch! And this isn't a prom! Why do those two look like they're taking prom pics?!

And bonus, if you look at this photo of LD story, Albitch looks like a horror movie ghost who does the jumpscares

I see no difference 🤭🫣

Let's go back to the ring.

Someone posted on here a few weeks to months ago, that Chris was engaged during August...

See the problem with that timeline is that Albitch posted more pics with LD, and she was most definitely not wearing a ring then 👀

Jump back to the present.

Imma go back to her solo pics again. We've all seen them, no need to reiterate, see the thing is, for some reason, another fan page of hers got a more HD and clear photo of the ring...

How in the hell did they get that?! But not her Agency 👀

This is the part where I call two rings, and she used Photoshop again!

And can y'all stop saying that her ring is gold, it clearly fucking isn't!!! Unless y'all are colorblind that's white gold or silver!

Now, as for the two rings the one in the picture we saw is definitely not that one.

That ring still looks silver or white gold, but has a round stone with nothing surrounding it, and is dull compared to everything else she's wearing. Meanwhile the new pic, square stone, with stones on the band...

This is where I call BULLSHIT

Those two pictures look as different as Chris does in the Lisbon old-new photos! So, in conclusion, somebody photoshopped it in, and chose a completely different equally cheap ring, and made it shiny 😒

Seriously, this is getting tired, and I'm sorry but Albitch and her entourage of wannabe influencers should just quit.

No one will believe her because she's been lying from the get go. Aside from that, if she and Chris are real, it means she's been openly cheating on him since before they were ever official. And Chris flirts with women, and tells the whole world he's single, and looking for a serious partner.

Again, at this point, Dodger and the kids are the only innocents. Who need to be protected from all this. Because another bomb will drop, and we will lose more of the Fandom than we did when NYCC happened. 😞

Albitch Ring Rant Post Part 1

[thursdayinspace]

20 questions for 20 writers

tagged by @thatfragilecapricorn30 @randomfoggytiger and @baronessblixen thank you!! <3

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 21

2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 70.063 -- this is my new AO3, so that's why it's still so low, haha.

3. What fandoms do you write for? Only X-Files now.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? spectacular (glasses sex!), it's the day the world didn't end, from this morning forward (that makes me so happy), got you covered, wild side

5. Do you respond to comments? yes. if I ever don't, I'm sorry, it's not because i didn't love your comment, but i just don't get around to it right away sometimes. but i try to reply to every single one because i love them all.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? ohhh. i don't write super angsty endings . . . I guess mend into pieces bc it's season 2 and they know they're making a mistake, but we all know they'll figure it out eventually, so.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? they pretty much all end happily. i'm going to more or less randomly pick five ways to say i love you. because i loved writing that ending.

8. Do you get hate on fics? so, okay. there are two stories here i want to tell from an old fandom. one is funny. one is kind of great, really?

the funny one: i got a looooong comment on a fic, like several paragraphs long, going into great detail about why the fic sucked and why i sucked and why i had personally offended them by writing fic at all. they obvs meant to comment anonymously but forgot to log out. by the time i got to my computer, they had deleted their entire account. of course i had their name in the ao3 email. i laughed so hard at that.

the kind of amazing one: i got a very rude anon on tumblr, and i responded by saying i'd be happy to discuss their criticism, but i wasn't going to have a conversation with a hockey puck with sunglasses, and asked them to come off anon so we could talk. and they did! they showed up in my dms a short while later. we solved nothing and did not part as friends, but i actually have mad respect for that. wherever they are today, i hope they have taken some anger management classes and are doing well!

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? yeah, i certainly do. idk what kind? the porny kind? lol no i mean it's kind of lame but fun.

10. Do you write crossovers? i wrote a stargate atlantis/firefly crossover centuries ago but that was it. or maybe start trek with sth else, i don't remember.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? not to my knowledge.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? i don't think so, no.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? yes! it's so much fun and i would do it again.

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship? mulder and scully!

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? i plan to finish all of them.

16. What are your writing strengths? it used to be dialogue but i don't think it is anymore. idk? i think i can create an atmosphere?

17. What are your writing weaknesses? i tend to repeat myself a lot and then skip over other things completely. i'm not good with transitions between scenes.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? i haven't done it, but if it would make sense for a fic, i might do it.

19. First fandom you wrote for? stargate atlantis. i was very late to the fanfic party.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written? it's called 'ellipsis' and is still with the beta. but of the ones i've already posted, either from this morning forward or yesterday's future.

Randomfoggytiger added additional questions:

1. Is writing a hobby or way of life? i mean it's a hobby but it's definitely also a way of life. there isn't ever a time when i don't think about writing and everything all the time connects in some way to a thing i'm writing and i can't imagine what i'd do without writing.

2. A journal full of writing notes or a clean, completed manuscript? completed manuscript! or notes? uhh . . . both?

3. Who (or what) is your writing inspiration? everything. random things. i can't think of one specific thing, it can be literally anything.

4.Which is worse: someone you "idolize" reading your first draft or listening to you sing? both thoughts are equally awful lol

5. Has writing from someone else's POV ever changed your own perspective? yeah, i think so. not in any big way, but about smaller stuff, just the way i look at certain things? yes.

6. Tumblr, AO3, LiveJournal, or FFN? ao3!!! my tinkerbell brain loves the comment section, haha. also it's just so much nicer to read on ao3 and there's the download option, so also as a reader, def ao3.

7. AO3 wordcount, and are you satisfied with it? 70.063 - no, i'm not satisfied with it. i used to write multi-chapters with more words. but it's a new account so yeah starting small again.

8. What movie/book/fic gripped you irrevocably? jasper fforde's 'thursday next' series. it's where i stole my name from. literary detectives? oh man. it's the kind of story where you wish you'd had the idea first. go read it!!!!!

9. What's the highest compliment you could ever be given, and have you been given it? i am really really lucky to have been given so many amazing compliments and i appreciate every single one. i couldn't say what means the most to me . . . probably when it's personal to the commenter? when someone tells me sth i've written touched them in some way. bc that's what i want to achieve.

10. What defines your writing style? lol idek man pretentious purple prose? i think i live somewhere between overuse of metaphors and focus on the rhythm of a text. i love writing in english bc it flows so nicely. idk is trying to make it sound nice a style bc then that's at least what i'm going for.

who hasn't been tagged? no pressure tags for @backintimeforstuff @nachosncheezies @actual-changeling and everybody else who wants to!

[bosskie]

2 Years Ol' Blog 'n' 3D Molluck Stuff

Man, having this blog has been a ride... I posted my first post here on 1st April 2022 and created this blog/account a few days before. During this whole time, my mental health issues have affected my blog and I was about to delete it before I even posted anything but I still decided to give it a try since I already got some followers; it felt supportive. I was surprised to have such a warm welcoming here and it still warms my heart. I still had some moments when I had to hide all my posts since I just couldn't stand my own stuff. Sometimes, it still comes to my mind but I'm doing my best to try to learn to at least tolerate my own creations. I feel sorry for being like this but only if it was easy to get rid of self-hatred... I also just tend to only see all my mistakes I have made when I look at my stuff, all the things I should learn...

But I try to be positive here, even I just tend to see darkness when I think about my own future. I just don't believe in myself... Originally, I didn't wanna be personal here but it just happened when one anon asked me if I had more art to show... I didn't since I have hidden all my old art. I have been on Tumblr for 10+ years but never posted anything until I created this blog. What brought me here was the active Oddworld community, the lovely people here. Even I think dim things about myself like every day, I do appreciate your support! Even I have my own difficulties with believing in that I have any talent/skills, compliments are light to my own dark image of myself.

I'll talk more later on this post but now, I'll show some 3D Molluck stuff and well, talk about Molluck... I show first my first Molluck sculpt I did improve today (yesterday):

I would still say that this is a WIP since well, there do is stuff to improve and do but yeah, I think that it would be wiser to let this be now and redo this since this is done in such an amateur way... There is no way to animate this since its geometry is a nightmare... I was able to rig this a bit when it wasn't so detailed, test out animating it but then, it became impossible. But well, the truth is that I do have still made animations with this despite of that... Frankly, the reason why I created this sculpt was my thirst for Molluck, how much I wish I was able to be with him... But this has helped me out multiple times with my drawings too!

I'm still not totally sure about some things of his anatomy but I have been doing my best to figure it out. I also realize that this sculpt makes Molluck look a bit more muscular/bigger than he is (see his neck and head size) but I have tried my best with fixing this situation since he did look even more bulky back then... The difference ain't too big but well, I do can create my own version of him too! I also see that this ain't 100 % correct when it comes to his face too but I tried my best. I'm still a beginner with 3D stuff, so I didn't use the best methods to do this either... I also feel like I just learned new things about his head when I compared this to the SoulStorm model recently... So yeah, this sculpt is a mixture of SoulStorm model, good ol' concept art of Gluk anatomy and my own adjustments. I only say SoulStorm model because it's based on New 'n' Tasty model, so he probably looks like the same under the suit but yes, that naked Molluck model has been my main reference for his body. The biggest change I have done compared to that has been his hands since I love his hand in that concept art! They are just the best hands, the most beautiful hands I know... But well, his whole body is the most beautiful body, at least for me!

Yeah, I think that I have made it quite clear how much I would love to have him... I already have said it but, he is my only desire... I cannot help myself with that Molluck is 'a perfect man' for me... No one else has felt right for me, there was always something off... But frankly, even I have seen multiple people being thirsty for Molluck, I have seen no one else wanting him like I do... None of that 'spicy' Molluck art I have seen reminds me of mine. It's just interesting how differently I see him since in the others' 'spicy art' Molluck has similar vibe and role... I don't really want Molluck because I have a thirst for him; I only have a thirst for him because I love him and for me, it's about sharing and giving love! I truly wish to make him feel good and loved. I have decided that I don't post my NSFW Molluck content but some cropped stuff but I could still post some suggestive things, though like I have said, I see him from a different perspective than the ones I have seen, with what I mean that he is 'the receiver'. I have just never seen him in this role by the others. I guess that this can explain why I have said that for me, he already has 'the stuff', no need for 'the usual additions'. His body also just feels more 'elegant' when there is no such a thing. This is just my preference, you can have yours. But it's just interesting to see how my way to imagine/see Molluck differs from the others. Though yes, I do remember when that one Molluck ask blog was still active and at least one person asked if Molluck liked things in his ass... Might have been just harassment or no one has just published such a content...

Frankly, I do actually prefer his back view instead of his front view, even I have been drawing it more... It's just that I'm unsure of how to handle nudity here... I don't wanna post his ass in front of the people who don't wanna see it... Nudity is natural for me but I just don't wanna make anyone feel uncomfortable because of my naked Molluck stuff... I just adore his body, so gotta draw it... Man, I would just keep talking how much I love his different body parts but I save you from that...

So, yeah, let's move on! I have already shown this one but I feel like reposting it now:

This is my stylized, simple Molluck model from last summer (2023). It's close to be finished since it's meant to be simple but some details are missing. You might wonder what's this style: Back then, I was inspired by Osamu Sato and his old video game graphics, so I wanted to create something similar to his style. I would like to try to rig this and then try to create more 3D models. Man, I would like to do so much 3D stuff... Oh, and yeah, it would be fun to make a naked version of him with this style too! I just have so much Molluck art ideas inside my head...

Oh, and yeah, I have been thinking for a longer time if I should show this or not but this feels like the right place to do it. So yes, I have created like a year ago a Molluck sim for The Sims 2. I know that it can look odd but he cannot look much better without doing own mods... I don't know how to mod these games but would like to learn it.

But yeah, I pretty muchly abused the face sliders here and did my own textures but also found a cigar for him. I did improve his face over time since I also needed to see how it works in the game. I also needed to lift his face after I found the cigar to place it into his mouth. It's basically only possible to create him to The Sims 2 like this because of the Body Shop is such a great tool and it actually lets you to use those face sliders without a limit: just edit the sim over and over again. Though yes, there is a tool to paint your sim's textures in The Sims 1 but it's such a pain to use... Oh, and you might notice those little dots: I just love to add his nevi to him, like you might have noticed from my drawings!

And yeah, my only reason for creating this Molluck sim was my self-insert stuff, even I do prefer him like he is, not as 'an anthro'... I just crave for this Gluk every day... Well, the good thing is that I'm able to create stuff about him, so I get some help even I know that I'll never get him... Also, even I recently said that marriage feels odd, it has now started to make some sense to me... I mean, I have started to feel alright about it. Maybe it's that my feeling of Molluck being 'the one' for me is getting stronger and stronger or it's a sign of my healing since I have just felt like it's better that no one is bound to me... Maybe it's the both. But despite of this, I still value the friendship the most since it's the strongest relationship type, so when the relationship is based on it, it's stronger than mere romance ect. I don't know if it sounds odd or not but for the first time, I actually feel good about marrying Molluck.

But yeah, this has already been a long post but just wanna say some stuff related to my blog:

I have multiple reasons why I tend to turn reblogs off and it's only for my own mental health, not that I had anything against you. Sometimes, I just kinda hate to see myself posting so actively, so I don't really like to see my stuff on someone else's blog either... I have never really known what to think about reblogs... Also, I don't like some technical things related to them, so it also makes me prefer to have them off. Maybe there somewhere my feeling of that I'm just ruining everything, also this community, affects this too... It's at least one big reason why I don't really interact here, even I would like to.

The truth is that I have never pressed the like button here, even I would have liked to, and it's just because of me feeling like it's better that I'm invisible. I tend to feel ashamed of myself, think that I'm a failure... It's not easy for me to be open and relaxed but I just wish to talk about Molluck so much that this happens... I do have other things in my life too but it's much more difficult for me to talk about them... I just feel like that if I didn't have Molluck, I wouldn't post any content right now, would have disappeared from the Internet. It's like extremely difficult for me to create an online imago, 'sell myself', build a portfolio... It has felt like this is gonna be my doom... My own self-hatred... But I'm still trying my best and going to make a big investment to this stuff this year, so that I can create better 3D stuff and use Unreal Engine. It's just for my future, otherwise I wouldn't feel ready to do it. I'm just trying to believe in myself, even it feels so difficult... I just wanna be honest about what I'm going thru since it affects my content a lot.

I have already written so much, so it's probably the best to end this post. But before that, I do wanna thank for all your support and your understanding, patience... I thought that I would probably be left all alone again after I open up about the hell I have inside my mind, that probably no one actually wants me to be here, like I'm used to think, but I have been wrong. It really touches me that I have been welcomed here and despite of everything, you still wish to support me. It's just about to make me cry, especially when, frankly, suicidal thoughts are quite common for me, been for over a decade. It's just like something daily... I'm so used to it. But something always just tells me not to do it, even I have thought about it like over a thousand times, if not thousands of times... Sometimes, I just think that I should be Molluck's next meat product but in my imagination, he still tells me that he would only lose money if he did that because I'm priceless.

I don't expect that people really read my stuff but I do really appreciate all the time you spend on my stuff since time is valuable! I just kinda need to write this stuff to here since I spend like almost all of my time alone and there somewhere I also wish that all this writing could help the others who also deal with similar mental health problems. I often feel like no healing has actually happened but I see from little things that slow healing is happening, like that I feel now alright about marrying Molluck and it only happened like a few days ago. I'm just starting to find happiness thru Molluck but he alone hasn't still helped me to heal. Even my mind keeps telling me it's a waste to support me and I have difficulties with receiving compliments, all support is still helping me.

Sometimes, I still think about this anon's words from about two years ago: 'I am cheering you and Molluck on and toasting to your brilliance.' The other compliments I have also gotten do also echo inside my head from time to time but I just wanted to say that I would have never imagined something like this to be said to me and these words do really mean a lot to me still. Toasting also just sounded fitting for this anniversary, so even this feels difficult for me, because I suffer from this severe self-hatred, I wish to toast to myself, for keeping going, even it has been so difficult, felt so tempting to end this all... But I wouldn't have still made it this far alone, so thanks for my family, all the lovely people who have supported me thru my life but also OWI for creating Molluck( and Oddworld)! It just feels like a miracle that I'm still here.

~ Much love!

[desultory-novice]

I haven't had the chance to do it yet, but do you know if the Japanese pause screens or text in RTTDDX contain any lore that, by chance, didn't appear in the english translations? I ask because I just remembered when Star Allies did the same thing with Void Termina's jp pause screen. (I wish I could relive that day, lol)

I'm sorry, Inifinite! I actually had this post ready to go a while ago but Tumblr kept borking on me and I eventually shelved it because I was so annoyed by it crashing mid-edit! Finally came back to it because this is a very good question!

-

So, I only looked at the ones I had screenshots of, but I want to start out by saying the Pause Screen translation here is without question more accurate than previous games. This is FL levels of accuracy - the only differences being very minor word choices. As such, I've gone ahead and stuck with the EN descriptions here and "added back" (via parenthesis) anything that could be said to have been "left out" from the Japanese!

----

[Master Crown] (The resurrected crown of control has become a mistletoe tree (1) bearing red fruit) Those who wear the Master Crown will gain power, but so will the darkness in their hearts. Thanks to the red fruit, it's become a wrathful wreath-a destroyer called the tree crown without a ruler!

-

(1) The word for "mistletoe tree" can also be read in Japanese as "host tree" because mistletoe is a parasite!

-

[Master Crown; Last Phase] To free the tree (from the bindings (2) of control) and bring an end to the destruction... To take responsibility for his wicked ways... With all of his magic infused into the sword, he must strike! Magolor must atone for his misdeeds!

-

(2) The full kanji here would typically be 呪縛 - "curse" + "restriction" but "curse" and "tree" are sound-alikes, so they left the "curse" kanji off, meaning it CAN be read as "bound tree"

-

[Magolor Soul - True Arena Phase 1] The one-eyed wreath grants power but swallows the soul... It devours, stealing any sense of self... Truly, this crown rules all. Free him from this nightmare! Take his hand and save a new friend!

-

This one is...basically as is. Anything would just be word choice nitpicks, but to be honest, I don't even have that many. The biggest one would be that the Japanese says "...become friends!" rather than "save a new friend" but "new" implies that they're going to become friends, so yeah. It's the same

-

[Magolor Soul - True Arena Phase 2] Kirby... Ugh! I hate having to rely on you, and your vacant stare when I revealed my grand plan was truly insulting. Well, let's see if you can break this thing on my head. If you can, then someday...hee hee heee...I may get to toy with you again!

-

I wrote my alternate translation as well as my reasonings for it and what this translation does well in another post [HERE!]

-

[Magolor EX] It was in a dusty(4) tome that Magolor first learned about that legendary item. It all sounded like a fairy tale, until he (miraculously) found the Lor and began scheming. It's time to save the universe, Lor...and Magolor!

-

(4) "Dusty" is an elaboration on the EN part but definitely not a stretch. One thing that is different is that "legendary item" is absolutely PLURAL in Japanese. Meaning he learned about everything through those same books. Presumably, this includes the artifacts he tells Kirby about, including the Fountain of Dreams and Galactic Nova.

-

[Magolor Soul EX] (A battle that exceeded all limits caused the limitless power of the Master Crown to overflow without stop.) What remains of Magolor is a sad shell. He's possessed by the limitless power of the Master Crown, imprisoned by the hatred and obsessions of prior rulers. Now...defeat it and free Magolor's soul!

-

I mentioned in a post just yesterday that it was implied the Master Crown kinda went berserk because of Magolor and Kirby's fight and the pause screen lore does seem to play into that interpretation. It was definitely dangerous, but the fight is what caused it to overflow and consume Magolor? Of course, something like that seems like it was bound to consume him eventually...

-

[Lor EX & Magolor]

Lor sensed something was amiss when it met Magolor. It can travel to far-off paradises with ease...so why didn't it? Perhaps it hid its true power, wanting to be stopped after (3) stealing the crown...

-

(3) Another fine translation; what's most interesting here is word used here in Japanese can also be interpreted as "being made a pawn to retake/recapture the crown"  The key being "recapture" rather than "steal"

There's some mysteries about Magolor this game has given us. (Gotta find time to work on my Magolor essays... Plural...)

[aritamargarita]

GOLDEN || 005

hello everyone we are backk i was too busy of dying from embarrassment and the fact tumblr was being weird. i said i was hungry then i went back to sleep then i woke up again and decided to eat cereal, yeah

this is the mirror chapter to the ecw one..things are a bit different here in this timeline by the way, for the sake of continuity we’ll say macho man did not help create wolfpac and it was scott hall instead. i do be struggling to post though.

had to rewrite this so many times it got so bad. sorry if this seems short. if you forgive me i will give y'all two attitude chapters..the calm before the storm AND VENGEANCE! if it lets me post lol. my layout is FUCKED i cant even add anything else augh i give up. i'll come back for this

People disagree on a lot of things. They can disagree on the type of music they like, they can disagree on what kind of foods they like, and they can even disagree on something as simple as their favorite colors.

However, people found it hard to disagree whether or not you deserved a spot in World Championship Wrestling. There’s people that love you, there’s people who hate your guts, there’s people that feel conflicted.

One thing was certainly true though, whenever you’re set to be on television, no one could ever take their eyes off of you. Even though you were mainly on commentary right now, it’s hard to pay attention when you’re around.

Maybe it’s your cadence. Maybe it’s the way you carry yourself. Maybe it’s just because you’re a fighter. It’s something about you that makes people wonder. It’s how you landed yourself in the New World Order in the first place.

Macho Man and Miss Elizabeth had dispersed from the group. Hogan split to try and create his own, NWO Hollywood, which left Kevin Nash and Scott Hall to deal with the damage.

After nights of debating what to do with themselves, the both of them created the NWO Wolfpac, but it wasn’t complete. There’s something missing. Some spice to the group, a wildcard….someone no one would ever expect.

They came to the conclusion that they wanted a woman in the group. It’d be something new. Something that’ll give them a hold on the steadily growing women’s division as well. As of right now, there were very limited options. Elizabeth was already with Macho Man, they were damn sure Madusa wasn’t interested, and they didn't want just anyone.

So, that leaves you. Who better than the Queen of Extreme herself?

Now, they didn’t know you entirely too well, but they’ve heard of your accolades so far. Every so often they’ll watch ECW to compare it to WCW, so they’ve seen you more than once.

You could remember meeting them like it was yesterday. You were sitting in the office of Eric Bischoff, with him telling you how “you were trying too hard” for a chance to get in the ring and compete for the title.

You’ve got a rising suspicion that people were talking around backstage and you wouldn’t stand for it.

“We gave you a spot on commentary.” Eric says, shifting through papers. You were sure your contract was somewhere in there. “Isn’t that enough for you?"

“No.” You quickly answer. While you tried to be grateful for being on commentary, it’s boring to just watch matches and not get in on the action. “There’s a women’s division here and I want to get in on that.”

It was the whole reason why you jumped ship, truth be told. It’s fun getting involved in others matches and competing with the men, but you wanted to extend your range.

Women’s wrestling doesn’t get as much attention as it deserves. Even when you were in ECW, most of the ‘matches’ weren’t matches. They were cat fights that last 6 seconds. You and Luna’s match was the only official woman’s match in the company, and even then, you two didn’t have a lot of time to do what you wanted.

A lot of your coworkers were upset you were going to jump ship. Especially Raven. He was begging you not to leave, which was rare coming from him.

He eventually stopped begging, which makes you think he’s come to terms with the fact you were leaving. Paul Heyman did his best to make you stay, but it's about time you set your sights on other things.

It wasn’t looking too hot so far, though. Eric looks up at you. “Even if you wanted to, there’s no one for you to wrestle right now. You want to become a Nitro Girl? Know how to dance?”

“No.” You repeat, shaking your head this time. “I can dance, but I don’t wanna be a Nitro Girl.”

“Well, what do you want to do?” Eric exasperatedly asks, setting down the stack of papers. “We’re not getting anywhere here.”

You quickly counter. “I’m trying to get somewhere. Are you not understanding me? What’s the issue?? There’s a whole division! And I’m not in it!”

He pauses for a moment before looking back up at you. “I do understand. It’s hard to not understand you. I told you, you were trying a bit too hard and people were starting to get concerned with your attitude.”

Your attitude? What? You’ve been kind and sweet to everyone backstage so far.

“I don’t have an attitude.” You say. “And I’m nice to everyone here.”

“Listen, don’t shoot the messenger.“ He holds his hands up in defense. “I’m sure you’re a real sweetheart. Unfortuneately, I’ve started to hear otherwise.”

“Color me intrigued. Who’s been saying those things?”

Before he could answer you, the door opens and in comes Kevin Nash and Scott Hall. At the sight of you sitting down, bright smiles grow on their faces.

“Hey, chica,” Scott says, taking a toothpick out of his mouth. “You’re just the person we’ve been looking for.”

“Glad both of you are in one place.” Kevin says. “We’ve got an offer that’ll work out for all of us…”

And it was just history after that. This storyline saved you from possibly tanking and the NWO gaining more popularity. Were they listening from outside of the door? Possibly. Would they confirm? No. Would they deny?? No.

It was easy for you to become closer with Kevin and Scott. All of your personalities just flow like water together. Eric Bischoff was glad he made the decision in the end, especially since you three were bringing him more money at the end of the day.

You three had gotten so close, that the first promotional picture you took was the three of you in matching red and black gear.

You really liked that photo. So much so, you decided to frame it and put it on your wall with the rest of them. Some would say it’s conceited to display photos of yourself, but who really cares? No one ever tells you those things.

….Actually, Kevin does. Every time he and Scott drop by your home, he always comments on your pictures, then falls asleep on your couch like the heathen he is.

Somehow he manages to hear every little thing in the house. If you turn the television off, he’d shoot up and say he’s watching it like an old man.

Scott’s always been a friendlier house guest. Sometimes he’d bring you housewarming gifts, but you can’t say he’s not like Kevin, he does immediately goes to sleep in your recliner chair. It’s his favorite spot.

Those housewarming gifts reminds you of the time he brought you the absolute ugliest glass vase you’ve ever seen. It was so bad. The colors clashed with each other, the shape was weirder than a normal vase, and you weren’t entirely sure if flowers would even look good in it.

You still accepted it though. It’s your shitty little vase. You will love and cherish it forever.

HOWEVER, even though they treated you with respect, they weren’t exactly the best at treating your house with respect.

You knew Kevin and Scott were quite the socialites. You met new people everyday thanks to them. They’d drag you to parties and bars, just about anything that was a big event. If anyone from ECW knew, they’d be incredibly jealous that you’re going out with them.

The one time you let them host something at your house was a disaster. A big disaster.

Kevin insisted you get pizza that night, so that’s exactly what you did. You were confused when he ordered like 10 of them. He said it was a small event. It must’ve been a mistake, but you’ll be damned if you pass on free pizzas. Now you don’t have to cook for a while!

You’re going to have to make two trips, which was kinda annoying but oh well. It is what is is. You’re only holding four pizzas, so it’s a little difficult to see in front of you.

Once you open the door, you’re greeted with loud music. What is happening? No one’s in here singing kumbaya right now….

You really hope your neighbors haven’t called the police. You assume it’s safe since you pulled in the driveway with no cop car sitting there, but holy shit, this is REALLY LOUD. You're not even sure what to do. All you can do is stand at the front of your door, pizzas in hand.

Your eyes dart around to some of your coworkers and people you didn’t even know. What the hell can you do?!

“Heyyy, mamacita! You saved us! We’re dyin’ from hunger here!” The voice makes you come back to Earth, turning your head to the left. It’s Eddie Guerrero strutting towards you while wearing sunglasses inside. Huh…

He grins at you before opening a pizza box. “Pepperoni, eh? Got anything else? Tastes too plain to me.”

“Just—“ You sigh, literally giving him all four boxes. “Take it all. It’s all yours. I don’t know what’s on the rest.” You’re too exasperated to even start another conversation. You need everyone to get the hell out of here first.

You leave him to walk over to a blonde woman who was chatting it up with other people. “Hey, excuse me…who are you?”

She looked familiar, but you couldn’t place a name on her.

The woman turns to you, drink in hand. There’s no animosity on her face, just a big smile. “Oh, I’m Torrie. Are you friends with Kevin too? I gotta say, when he invited me here, I was surprised. I’m having a good time! And this house is huge! Whoever is the owner really outdid themselves.”

….You really don’t care. “I see. You could say I’m a friend. I have to ask, have you seen him around anywhere? Or if you know him, have you seen Scott Hall?"

“Hmm, I saw him earlier, but I’m not sure where he went. I think I saw the other guy you were talking about over there.” She says, motioning over to the corner with her free hand. "I keep hearing his name."

You nod, thanking her quickly before letting out a sigh. "...Fun fact, I'm the owner of this house. I need all of you to get out of-"

“Catch!” You hear someone yell. You immediately snap your head over to see two people playing catch with your vase. Not just any vase, THE SHITTY VASE! Now it’s certified that everyone’s gotta get the hell out.

“Stop! Stop throwing the damn vase!” You yell at them. They listen luckily. Before you make your big announcement, you needed to find at least one of your boys. Your ears are starting to ring from this music.

You found Scott first. He was entertaining some ladies, but he immediately shoo’d them away once he got sight of you. You were fuming, so much so that Scott started to feel scared of you. The words; “what’s wrong, chica—“ had barely left his mouth before he let out a whistle at your expression.

You point a finger at him. The smile that appears on your face scares him even worse. “Scott, you know I love you, right?”

“Yeah…?” This is probably the first time you’ve heard his voice laced with uncertainty.

“Great. Everyone needs to get the hell out. You tell me where Kevin is, I’ll let you stay.”

Scott knew that snitches get stitches, but it’s every man for himself. He’s never snitched any faster in his life.

After that fiasco, Kevin very profusely apologized to you. He repeatedly told you he wouldn’t do it again, all the while the person who betrayed him stood and watch the drama unfold. Fortunately, he’s kept true to his word.

These days he and Scott just drop by for some simple hospitality and to travel together for the show.

Your mother would probably chew you out if she knew how lenient you were these days. She’d just have to understand that they’re your friends, so of course you’d help them out every now and then.

Truth be told, you actually enjoyed the company. It made your home a lot less lonelier. There was a time where you had no visitors when you were in the midst of jumping from promotion to promotion. You weren’t sure if you liked the silence or not…

Save it for another time. Thinking back on the past is fun, but the present is what truly matters.

You’re backstage, idly pacing around as you glance towards the small television screen every so often. There’s a segment with Eric Bischoff and Hulk Hogan going on, something that you found incredibly boring.

They didn’t give you any matches today. It was more than likely because the men were mostly dominating the card. You just wanted to punch the wall.

Eric had recently said you were going to get more involved, but so far it’s looking like that’s not the case...ugh.

Both Kevin and Scott were backstage with you, not ready in the slightest. Meanwhile, you were already ready and raring to go. On cue, you were supposed to interject in honor of the Wolfpac. The other two would come out later to defend you.

Kevin’s too busy on the phone to pay attention to the segment. “Yeah, man. Scary woman. She’ll kill you if you even look at her wrong.”

“What’re you talking about?” You ask, turning around. “Where’s Scott?”

He waves you off, then motions towards the bathroom. “Yeah. Nah, that’s not it. She’s a sweetheart.”

“Alright then.” You wonder who he's talking about. All you can assume is that Scott's fixing up his hair.

“That Wolfpac trio has been causing nothing but trouble lately, brother.” Hogan says. Eric’s holding the mic for him, so he’s making as many exaggerated hand movements as he can.

Hogan was running his mouth about how bad things have been lately within the company. The mention of your name makes you turn back around.

“They’re a disgrace to the New World Order’s name. NWO Hollywood is where it’s at! You lost half of your members, so now you’re nothing but wannabe superstars. If you jabroni's think you can get the best of my group, you’ve got another thing coming. I think we should fire them, fire them all. Especially that [Name] girl. She’s been poking her nose where it shouldn’t be.”

That was the straw that broke the camels back. You’re going out there. You stomp over towards the door, throwing it open and storming out.

You could hear your name being called, yet you don't stop walking.

You’ve had enough. It’s like high school all over again. People gossiping and whining for no reason. You have a rising suspicion that Hogan’s the one at fault for everything. Before you head out there, you make sure to get a mic from a staff member.

There’s no music, no nothing. You’re just here to set the record straight. For a second, the lights of the stage almost blind you, but your eyes slowly adjust.

Standing at the center of the stage, there’s a hint of a smile on your face as you hear the crowd cheer at your appearance. You haven’t even said anything yet. You hold up your hand, making the crowd quiet down so that you can actually speak.

“Hulk Hogan, you are FOURTY-FOUR YEARS OLD. You’re waaaay too old to be acting like this. Newsflash, it’s not the 80’s anymore. It’s time for you to retire.”

The crowd is still surprised that you even had the gall to come out here.

“And you talk about me,” You say, making your way down the ramp. “I think we should start talking about you. No one wants to hear the saaame oldddd jarrgoonnn.” The moment you get to the ring, you hop on the apron, not getting inside just yet. “Eric Bischoff goes on and on about how amazing Hogan is and he literally does absolutely nothing! I’m tired of it!”

Hogan takes the mic away from Eric, adjusting his title on his shoulder. “No one’s tired of HOLLYWOOD! All my NWOites love to see me on TV. They don’t want to see a woman here, let alone one that’s not a champion.”

“What they don’t want to see is a wrestler who should’ve retired about seven years ago. And for your information, I’d be a wonderful champion.“ You finally go under the ropes to get in the ring.

“I wouldn’t desecrate the championship like you did." The spray painted 'NWO' on the title was completely noticeable. Out of line, too. "In fact, why fire me? I’m a rising star. Once I get my hands on the Women’s Championship, your daughter can finally have a real role model to look up to.”

Hogan is surprised you’d go that far, bringing his own daughter into this. “You take that back.”

“Or what?” You’re not scared of him or Bischoff, and you kept the smug look on your face, which pisses him off even further.

Eric comes in between you two. “Hey now, this is pretty unfair. It’s obvious Hogan’s winning this fight. I mean, what can a woman like you do to the Heavyweight Champion?! I think you need to take a step back, [Name].”

It’s a warning you don’t heed. Instead, you kick you boss right in his shin, the crowd cheering you on. As he’s kneeling down in pain, you take the opportunity to hook your leg over his head and the other around his leg, bringing him right into the Black Widow.

You don’t need to get the heavyweight champion first, you’ll go for his best buddy!

You pull his arm back as humanly possible. Any further and you were sure you’d dislocate it. He wanted to know what a “woman like you” could do? He’ll get the answer.

Just as you see him about to tap, Hogan saves his buddy from getting a broken arm. He pulls you off, making you wrangle in his grasp. Eric falls down to the ground, holding his aching arm in pain. Once Hogan lets you go, you turn around and slap him as hard as you can.

“What’re you gonna do, huh?! Huh?!” You didn’t have your mic, so the crowd couldn’t hear you too well. You’re still talking trash though. “Hit me! I dare you!”

The crowd begins to cheer. You didn’t see why until you saw a man was ascending from the rafters. Once his feet hit the ring, you look at him in surprise. Hogan hadn’t noticed him yet, but he’s looming right behind him.

It’s Sting, the man who’s been watching you for the past few weeks. He made you crazy and not in the good way. You repeatedly told Kevin and Scott the walls had eyes, which made them glance at each other as if you were actually insane.

You’re swear you’re not. You knew he was watching you everywhere. Whether it be backstage or in the ring, Sting’s always just….there. Even when you’re in the same room, he never says anything. Just stares and walks away.

It’s not surprising he came out here. More than likely he wanted to try and save you. You didn’t need saving. You were just about to beat the shit out of Hogan for even interrupting your submission hold.

With that black metal bat, he lifts it up and pokes it right in his back. Hogan freezes in place and the crowd is losing their mind. Rearing his bat back, Sting quickly strikes him.

Hogan falls down in pain and you back up. Even if Sting wanted to “save you” the man was definitely unpredictable. You can see Eric scrambling out of the ring in the corner of your eye.

Sting lifts Hogan back up and Death Drop’s him right back down with ease. You flinch at the sound of them colliding with the mat. He gets up and turns his head towards you.

You point a finger toward him, almost warning him that if he comes any closer, he’ll get what’s coming to him. Where the hell was Kevin and Scott?! They completely abandoned you out here. They were supposed to run out and say a few things, but there’s no sign of them.

Sting starts walking closer to you. You feel your back hit the turnbuckle and you change your finger into your palm, waving it at him. Even if you feel your hand slowly start to shake as it grips onto the ropes, you don’t back down.

You didn’t want him to notice you’re freaked out. It’s the last thing you wanted him to notice.

With every step he takes, the more you think he’s going to do something. He doesn’t lift his bat, instead letting it drag on the canvas as he comes towards you. The crowd’s on their feet in anticipation. Would you get the same fate as Hogan or would he let you go?

He drops the bat. You can barely hear the sound of it hitting the mat due to the crowd yelling.

“I’ve got a knife in my pocket!” You say. He doesn’t say anything as he still corners you. “I’ve got mace too!” Nothing deters him, he just stares at you while you’re in the corner.

You were already starting to think of an escape plan. Something that’ll catch him off guard and hopefully give you enough time to escape. Maybe even give enough time for Kevin and Scott to get out here.

Drastic times means desperate measures. You grab his face and pull him closer to kiss him. The crowd erupts in cheers and you don’t feel Sting make any moves. It’s almost like he’s never kissed anyone before, but it’s hard to function when you’re busy trying to shove your tongue in his mouth.

Just in time, Kevin and Scott come rushing down the ramp, with the latter sliding into the ring with a chair and slamming Sting in the back with it. He slumps over, shifting most of his weight onto you.

Scott comes over and pulls him off, taking one glance at you to see if you’re alright. There’s a mix of your own red lipstick and Sting’s black lipstick smudged on your lips, and there’s a few spots of white paint on your face. Yeah, you’re fine. And he’s not talking about your looks.

Hey, at least he can proceed to beat the shit out of Sting! He’s glad he has a reason to straighten him out, especially since it had to deal with you. Kevin on the outside of the ring opens his arms, telling you to come over.

You hop under the ring ropes happily and he takes it upon himself to throw you over his shoulders in a fireman’s carry. “Off we go.” He chimed. It literally felt like you were on a skyscraper, god damn.

“Where the hell were you guys?! I’m pretty sure you missed your cue.”

“We got distracted. You were the one who stormed outta there first, so we thought you could handle it.” Kevin explains. He roughly changes the way he carries you, bringing you down into bridal style. At least you could hear him a bit better now. "Had to hang up my phone call and everything.”

Got distracted by what exactly?! They could see the television, what were they waiting for! You roll your eyes. “Whatever.”

“Don’t be mad.” He says with a grin. “We’re here now, princess." For a moment, he turns around to the ring, holding up a strange symbol with his free hand.

Scott finishes the job, sliding out of the ring and tossing the chair to god knows where. Kevin finally puts you down, so you shuffle over to be in the middle of them and raise their hands in victory.

You hope this was a message for Sting to stop following you all over the place and messing with your head. But you're also hoping Eric and Hogan understand that you're not one to be fucked with.

Being here was strange. It's a new world. Certain fans knew who you were, but many others did not. All you can wish for is that this run comes with peace and a LOT of luck.

didn't even save it as a draft this time i just hoped for the best. i still hope you guys enjoy, i will try and make the next flashbacks longer, and the next one after this will prob be a timeskip because there's not much for reader to do that night, if it makes sense. im gonna eat more cereal