#yeah nicholas is terrible but i like to think there was some affection between them. at least at one point

[seagullcharmer]

rusty lake posting (again)

this is really just a little thing but i keep thinking abt it. i've seen people talk abt how horrible nicholas is (he is!) but thru the lens of his marriage to caroline and how he's completely grey by the time david is born ('ewwww he must be soooo old!') and while i do believe he's older than caroline, i don't think it's as awful as people make it out to be. sure, we don't know for certain the age difference between him and caroline, nor between him and gerard, or his age in general really, but i do believe he went prematurely grey. this is entirely because when we see david (canonically somewhere between 15-17, due to him being Very Small in the family portrait where jakob says 'my family, 15 years ago' or whatever) without his hat, guess what! his hair's turning grey!

idk if i had a point with this. i just like thinking abt the eilanders.

[spookyboywhump]

Unrelated to the last piece I posted, here’s a soft drabble between Eli and Zander’s mother

CW: mentions of parental death, sibling death

***

He couldn’t sleep. He was staring at the glow in the dark stars on the ceiling, eyes burning but unable to actually sleep. Zander was asleep next to him, snoring as he had one arm thrown over Eli’s waist. He eventually felt he couldn’t lay there much longer, moving carefully to slip out of Zander’s grasp and get out of bed. He stretched his arms above his head before grabbing his jacket from where it was thrown over Zander’s desk chair, pulling it on for the comfort it provided.

He was quiet as he made his way downstairs, gripping the railing tightly on his way down. He’d found that going downstairs with only half his eyesight was difficult, he was terrified of falling. When he turned to head into the kitchen, and the connected dining room, he saw the lights were already on, despite the rest of the downstairs being dark. He hesitated, not wanting to bother anyone if they were also awake at this terribly late hour, but he thought better of it, walking into the kitchen anyway. As he did so, he could see over the counter, Zander’s mom, Valerie sitting at the kitchen table, a mug in her hands. She looked up when Eli walked in, smiling tiredly at him.

“I didn’t think anyone else was awake… is everything okay…?” She asked softly, and he hesitantly nodded.

“Yeah, I just- just couldn’t sleep…” He murmured. He got a glass from the cabinet, getting water from the fridge before going to sit down across from her.

“Is Daniel awake too?” She asked.

“No, he’s fast asleep. I was trapped under his arm for a while.” He laughed softly, choosing not to correct her on his name. She smiled though, seeming relieved that he was sleeping well at least. They both knew he usually didn’t.

“I know he’s changed his name, but it’s… difficult to call him that sometimes.” She said, and though he knew it was coming from a different place, it still was too close to things he’d heard before for his comfort. He tried not to show that on his face though, bringing his glass of water to his lips so he wouldn’t have to say anything. “I don’t think I would’ve minded if he’d decided it for himself but… knowing it was forced on him makes it harder…”

“Yeah… I think… I think that in the end, he did choose it though…” He said slowly. “He could’ve gone back but he chose to stay Zander…” She didn’t respond at first, and he began to worry that he shouldn’t have said anything at all, but after a moment she spoke again.

“You’re right.” She said, and he glanced up at her, not really used to hearing that in a genuine way from a parent, his own or otherwise. “He could’ve changed it if he had wanted to… I love him to death, I can get used to it for him.” She said, and he couldn’t help but smile.

“He’s really lucky to have you as his mom.” He said softly, hardly thinking before he said it. She seemed surprised for a moment, but happy to hear it.

“You’re a sweetheart, you know that, Elias?” She said, pausing to take a sip from her mug, a white ceramic one with sunflowers painted around it. “If you don’t mind, would it be alright if I asked about your family?” She asked, the question catching him off guard. “It’s just, you’ve never really brought them up. If you’re okay with it, I’d like to know more.” She said.

“I… uh… that’s fine…” He said slowly. He stared down into his glass of water, thinking it over carefully before saying, “Um… my mom passed away, when I was eighteen…” He started. “She was sick for a long time so I kind of expected it… my dad was never really around, he uh- he left when I was really little, but he did help me after she passed… I don’t talk to him anymore though, he… he usually just calls asking for money.” He said. He didn’t mind telling people about his mom, but he was always hesitant to bring up his dad, in fact his friends thought his father was dead because it was easier to say he was orphaned than to explain he was a greedy bastard who only cared about him now that he could benefit him. “I was mostly raised by my brother actually, but he passed away just before our mom did…”

“Oh… I’m sorry…” He didn’t want to look up, he didn’t like the look people gave him when he brought up his family. “That must be difficult…” She said, and he shrugged.

“It was, but… it got easier with time, and I… I don’t necessarily think family is just restricted to blood relatives… my friends, Zander, they’re my family too, and I love them.” He said, finally glancing up. “Zander, he actually- he reminds me of my brother a lot. He behaves like him, sometimes he says things that sound just like him. I don’t… I don’t want to place that role on him without his consent, but, I do- I do think of him as my brother. Not the brother I had, and not a replacement, but like, just a new part of my family.” He said, and Valerie nodded.

“An adoptive brother?” She suggested, and he nodded quickly.

“Exactly.” He said, and she looked almost amused, but not in that mean way that people often would when he said something strange.

“You know, I think he may feel the same way about you. I know that when I see you two interact, you look like brothers.” She told him. “I know that Zander always wanted a younger sibling. He was the only child I could have so we did plan to adopt, but things got interrupted when he… you know…” She said, “I think you’re the little brother he always wanted.”

He couldn’t help but smile, the thought of Zander feeling the same way towards him made him happier than he thought it would. He knew Zander had said he didn’t mind that Eli felt him and Everett were similar, but that didn’t mean he had felt that Eli was his brother, not at that time at least. He didn’t blame him for that, didn’t expect it of him, but now that they’d known each other for quite a while, grown closer and inseparable, a part of him hoped their relationship would be more than friends, more familial than anything else. If his brother had been his best friend, then he couldn’t see why his best friend couldn’t become his brother.

“I’m… I’m really glad to hear that…” He said. “I hope he does, it would be… amazing, actually if he felt that way. I guess just because of how long we were kept together, he feels like the closest person in my family…”

“I think he may be closer to you than he is to any of us now.” She said, and he felt a twinge of guilt at the sad smile on her face. “It’s not necessarily a bad thing though… I’m glad that he had you through that. And you know, I, Georgia and I, we are so, so thankful to you for getting him out.”

“I was determined to get him home as soon as he told me about you.” He said. “He would talk about you, Georgia, his friends. Sometimes even his dad… he didn’t have to say it, I could always tell just how much he missed you all. I’m happy I was able to help bring him back to his family.” He said, looking up as Valerie got to her feet. He figured she was just going to put her empty cup in the kitchen, but she stopped beside him, and for a moment he froze as she wrapped her arms around him, pulling him into a tight hug. He quickly relaxed though, not nervous or scared, entirely comfortable, entirely at home being held by her.

“You know, you’re part of this family too, now.” She told him. “You have been ever since he decided you were his brother.” She said, ruffling his hair as she pulled away, and it took all his self control to not cling to her, to not make that moment of affection last much longer.

“I… thank you…” He said quietly, his heart leaped in his chest, not from fear but almost, excitement, joy at hearing those words.

“Of course, honey.” She said, and he realized that he didn’t hate pet names when they weren’t being said sarcastically, condescendingly- or sincerely, coming from Nicholas anyway. “Will you still be up for a while?” She asked him, and he nodded.

“Probably… I’m… I’m not good at sleeping at night…” He said, and she nodded, finally making her way into the kitchen.

“Stay there a moment, okay?” She told him.

“Okay…” He could see her moving around in the kitchen, opening cabinets and moving things, though he wasn’t exactly sure what she was doing. He didn’t have to wait long, sitting cross legged on the chair and picking at his nails. He looked up when she came back though, and she set a blue mug down in front of him.

“I know drinking something sweet this late may not be the best idea, but I’d always make it for Zander when he couldn’t sleep.” She explained. “I don’t know how, but it always managed to knock him out.” She said, and he lifted the warm cup with both hands, the sweet smell of hot chocolate finally hitting him.

“Thank you…” He looked up at her and smiled, and she leaned down, giving him a loving kiss to the forehead before pulling away.

“You’re welcome. Try to get some sleep tonight okay, Elias?” She said, and he nodded.

“I will…” He brought the mug to his lips, instantly warmed up as he took a drink from it. She told him goodnight, and he stayed downstairs for a while after she left, slowly sipping his drink so as to enjoy it longer.

He hadn’t felt this way in a long time, the way he felt when his own mother was kind or gentle with him- loved, hopeful that the treatment and feeling would last longer than an hour. When he thought about it though, he somehow felt safer, more comfortable with Zander’s mother than his own, in the moment anyway. Valerie seemed to be a naturally comforting person, and he wondered if that had anything to do with Zander’s ability to provide kindness and comfort even when he’d been so scared of him at first

By the time he finished off the drink, he was feeling more sleepy. He got up and he washed his cup before heading upstairs, back into Zander’s room. He was still asleep, and Eli had to shove his arm out of the way to get back in his spot, though Zander was almost immediately clinging to him again, pulling him close. He moved his arm so that he could rest his hand over Zander’s and he closed his eyes, eventually finally falling asleep feeling happier than he had in a long time.

[themadlostgirl]

Not Dead Yet (Part 77)

*So I was saving this till tomorrow but after crashing my car I decided to celebrate my not dead-ness with a new chapter. I’M NOT DEAD YET BITCHES! (for real tho today has sucked so much)*

Pairing: Reader x Peter Pan

Warning: language

After the storm had passed I went to see how much closer we were to Neverland. The island was much closer and the clouds had abated some so it was easier to make out. Staring out at it I had a sudden urge to jump into the water. Kinda like when you’re standing high up somewhere and there’s a little voice in your mind telling you to jump. My heart was beating fast but I was never more steady as I gazed at the island.

The others were busy anchoring the ship and lowering the long boat into the bay. Emma came over to me and put a hand on my shoulder. “Stirring up any memories?”

“Kind of.” I shrugged, “I don’t remember it but I feel something. I can’t describe it.”

When I stepped onto the beach I was able to name the feeling. Home. This...this is my home. I was comfortable staring into the jungle. I had no idea what may be on this island but something in me knew I didn’t need to fear anything. Nothing could surprise me or hurt me. It was as familiar as how to breathe.

“Are you sure you can do this?” David asked breaking me from the identity crisis I was about to fall into.

“Yeah,” I nodded, “If it’ll help Henry. I can do it.”

“You’re gonna be fine. You have the looking glass in case of emergencies. You just have to fake it long enough to get in, get Henry, and get out. We’ll take it from there.” Mary Margaret assured me.

“Get in, get Henry, get out.” I took a deep breath and stepped into the jungle.

Once I was on my own I started to breathe easier. I could barely see anything but I knew exactly where I was going. Every upturned tree root and rock in the path was mapped out for me. I walked and walked trusting my instincts to lead me to the camp.

Small memories flitted past my mind as I walked. Passes of quiet laughter and dancing to hypnotic music. A warm fire and sparkling lagoons to swim in on hot days. My pace quickened further and further till I was at a dead sprint through the jungle. I jumped over fallen trees and careened out of the way of boulders at top speed. A wild smile on my face.

Come back here! The king wants to play!

I stopped so abruptly I tripped and fell face first into the ground. I scanned the jungle for the source of the voice but there was no one. Was it in my head? It was so clear though. Too familiar for a stranger’s voice.

I dusted myself off and continued to walk once more. The memories had stopped with my fall.

It had been about an hour, probably more, and there was still no sign of the camp. Maybe I should rest. I sat down and fiddled with the looking glass in my pocket. I needed to report to the others later tonight so they know I haven’t met my death in this jungle. I considered calling them now when I heard a pair of voices nearby.

“Was it really so wise to give them a map?”

“It’s all a part of the game, Felix. They run about while we do our own work.”

“Of course.”

There were a pair of boys walking along the trail. One of them was extremely tall and had a club like the one I was carrying. The other while shorter and only armed with a dagger seemed the more dangerous. And yet...not.

Without thinking I stepped onto the path. A million thoughts warring through my mind. Memories clawing for recognition but unable to break free. I need to keep myself under control. Get Henry, get out.

“Hey!” I blurted out.

The island had gone silent. Not even a rustle in the trees. The shorter one dropped the apple he had been carelessly tossing in the air. Finally something broke through when I saw his eyes. Clear and vividly green. This was Peter Pan.

I was frozen in my spot. What do I do now?

“Y/N…” He took the first step, approaching me slowly and reaching out a hand to touch my shoulder. Gripping it as if to make sure I was real. “You’re here?”

“I’m here.” my voice came out broken.

He enveloped me in his arms and I went rigid for a moment before I remembered to hug him back. The eyes from my dreams. The smell of wind and jungle. It was him.

This was the person that stole Henry. He was a demon according to Hook. A terrible force of chaos and death and treated everyone like pawns in a game. I should be scared of him. Terrified even. It shouldn’t matter that he was warm and smelled nice and being in his arms felt more real than anything back in Storybrooke.

Pan pressed his forehead to mine, those dark green eyes staring hard at me. “You’re really here.” There was a wide, disbelieving smile on his tanned face. “Where have you been? What happened to you?”

“Curse. Got trapped.” I tried to sound casual but my voice was trembling as I spoke. “It finally broke and I was able to get back.”

“You’ve been gone for so long…” his hands were holding my face and when he leaned in I stiffened but didn’t try to stop him.

“Ahem,” he pulled away and I remembered that there was a third among us. “This is a beautiful reunion. Do I get a kiss as well?”

“Sorry.” I rocked back on my heels. I was ashamed for forgetting myself so easily. I’m here to get Henry. Not to kiss the person who kidnapped him.

“Felix, you can return to camp now. But don’t say anything to the others. I want our Lost Girl’s return to be a surprise.” Pan instructed though his eyes never left me.

The boy, Felix, nodded and kept walking down the path. Once he was gone Pan drew me into him again. He smells like home.

“Y/N,” he murmured squishing me even closer, “Whoever cast that curse you got caught in, whoever is to blame for taking you from me will pay the ultimate price. I will not rest until I have their blood, I promise.”

“No!” I pushed away and he stared at me in shock. “I mean--it doesn’t matter now. I’m just glad to be home.”

“You’re right.” His gaze softened, “Right now all I want to do is look at you.” he studied me closely as if he would never see me again.

This isn’t fair. I’m not the girl he’s been waiting for. He looks at me and sees Y/N. The badass Lost Girl that was his second in command and who he cared for deeply. How can he look at me with that soft adoration when I can’t remember him and what he meant to me?

The frustration and guilt was starting to tear at me and I hid my face in his chest so he couldn’t see me lose it. Instead of asking why I was sobbing into his chest he held me close and pressed a few small kisses to the top of my head and temples.

“It’s okay,” he whispered, “It’s okay, pet. You’re home now. You’re okay.”

I looked back into his eyes and this time when he leaned in I did too. It was a deep kiss that stole the air from my lungs and made my knees buckle. I tried to tell myself that I was only doing it because that’s what he expected me to do and I needed to keep this up so to save Henry. If I was being honest with myself though I wanted to. It felt too right.

Then I was breathless for another reason. My mind flooded with memories of different kisses. Deep lustful make-outs, slow relieved kisses, quick pecks to my forehead, cheek, and hands. Sloppy kisses that tickled my neck and made me laugh. Reassuring kisses as we sat together that made me feel safe.

“Something wrong?” He asked when I had gone still.

“No...I…” I touched his face. “Kiss me again?”

He smiled at me and I relaxed in his arms as he kissed me once more. My toes curled in my shoes. I didn’t see everything but I saw what he meant to the me I couldn’t remember. It was something untamed, perverse, powerful and all-consuming. Something too dangerous to speak.

Lacing my hand with his he pulled me towards the camp. He was asking a million questions about where I was and how I was doing. I answered as best I could without incriminating myself. Finally I spotted a bonfire in the distance. Music drifted across the air and many figures danced around the camp.

“Boys!” Pan shouted to the camp, “Our Lost Girl has returned!”

There was a loud roar of excitement and many of the Lost Boys ran to me. I was crushed in dozens of arms.

“Y/N!” I heard a voice above the others and one of the boys tackled me. Another two were on me holding me and cheering. I forced a smile and tried to recall names but none came to mind.

“Guys, don’t suffocate her.” Pan reminded them and the boys started to back off. “Devin, that means you too.”

“I don’t want to though.” The first boy was still hugging me.

“Devin, let go of my Lost Girl.”

“Fine,” Devin let go and beamed at me, “It’s just great to have you home. Pan has been the duke of dour since you went missing and it was just--”

“That’s enough from you,” Pan shoved him away.

“Where the hell were you?” One of the other boys asked.

“Way to be delicate, Nicholas.” another boy said.

“It’s Y/N. Since when do any of us have to delicate, Benjamin?” Nick scoffed.

“It’s okay,” I stepped between them before they could start arguing, “I was in a cursed town. No way out. No way to remember who I was.”

“How’d you get back?” Ben asked.

Pan and the rest were looking at me now. “How did you get back? If it was the shadow it would have brought you right to me and I know you didn’t come back with those two idiots that brought us Henry.”

“Stowed away on Hook’s ship when I heard they were coming here.”

“That’s my clever girl,” Pan smirked, “I bet he was very surprised to see you.”

“You should have seen his face.” I surprised myself with how confident I sounded. “Priceless.”

“I bet,” he captured my mouth again. It was quick this time but no less heated.

There were a few whistles and catcalls among the grossed out groans of the Lost Boys. I was starting to get used to the brazen shows of affection. Y/N may not have thought anything of it but I still felt my face grow hot at the knowledge everyone just saw him kiss me so shamelessly.

“I know you two haven’t seen each other in thirty years but can you not get your freak on in the middle of camp?” a voice from the crowd shouted.

“My camp! I can do whatever I please, Verne.”

“Or whomever he pleases.” Devin muttered and I slapped him upside the head. “Ow!”

“You had that coming.” Ben shrugged and the others laughed.

I found myself laughing as well. Was this what it was like? My life as Y/N? These boys were so close and yet bickered like siblings. It was so easy to laugh and tease with them. More tiny memories floated from the depths of dumb jokes and good natured sparring matches. These boys weren’t just Lost Boys, they were the brothers I never had. They were my family.

Pan’s arm was locked around my waist as he ushered us through the crowd. “As glad as I am to have you home and I would love nothing more than to lock us away for the next couple of years to not be disturbed I have to know more about the people that came here with you.”

“Huh?” I tried not to think about what he meant by locking the pair of us away. There was no way the two of us had ever...oh god we did didn’t we? Those other dreams. The ones that wound up my body and jolted me awake drenched in cold sweat. My stomach started to sink as the possibility that this boy hanging onto me might try to coerce me into bed. I’ll pretend to do a lot to keep up this charade but that wasn’t one of them.

“Pet? You still with us?” Pan waved a hand in front of my face.

“Sorry,” I squeaked, now alarmingly aware of how close we were. “Lost in thought.”

“What can you tell me about these heroes that came with you? I know what to expect from Hook and the Dark One but I feel like you’d know more about the Saviour and the royals.”

“Right,” I nodded, “Well um...Emma is a very determined woman and--”

“Hold that thought,” Pan went stock still, “They’re cheating.”

“What--”

Pan whistled loudly and all the boys stood to attention. “The adults are cheating. Using magic to find our camp. You know what to do boys.”

Immediately the boys started to douse the fire and arm themselves. What was going on? Were they going to attack Emma and the others? “Y/N,” Pan turned to me, “As much as I know you’d want to help get back at these pests that trapped you in another realm I’m gonna need you to hide out.”

“Why?”

“Cause I need them alive for now and your bloodlust will wipe them out far too quickly.” he kept a firm grip on me and in an instant we were no longer in the camp but somewhere else entirely. On the ground fast asleep next to us was Henry.

“Look familiar?” Pan smirked down at Henry.

“I should say so. I’m his babysitter.”

“Then this should be easy. Keep an eye on him. I charmed him into a deep sleep that he won’t wake from for a while. I’ll be back to collect the both of you after we’ve dealt with these heroes.” he pecked my lips again. “If something goes wrong just shout for me.”

Unable to believe my luck I nodded and Pan gave me one more smile before disappearing in the blink of an eye. I knelt next to Henry and shook him. “Henry. Come on, Henry, wake up.”

He didn’t stir. “Dork, wake up! We’re here to rescue you!” I lifted his eyelids up but it was like looking into the eyes of a babydoll. That spell had him out cold. I can’t exactly carry him. I wouldn’t be able to get very far with an eleven year old kid weighing me down. Then Pan and the Lost Boys would know I was trying to help get Henry home.

I need to be able to do something.

The looking glass! I pulled it out and tried to talk to Emma. To warn her about what she was walking into. The mirror didn’t work though. Only my own reflection stared back at me. “Emma, please, answer!”

I felt a chill go up my spine and I stuffed the mirror back in my pocket. “That--that was quick.”

“I’m almost disappointed how fast it went by.” Pan sat down next to me and my heart gave a traitorous jump. “I could have let it go on longer but I wanted to get back to you. They understand the price of cheating and now they’ll play the game fairly.”

“What is the game?”

“The best there is. A finding game full of twists and turns and unexpected endings.”

“And Henry’s the prize.” I sighed. Henry wasn’t just some reward or pawn. He’s a good kid. A great kid. He’s my friend. I can’t leave him with this--this--imp! I don’t know what he plans to do with him and I don’t plan on finding out.

“Soon it will all be over,” Pan nestled me closer to him. “I’ll be cured and then nothing can tear us apart again.”

“It’ll all be over soon,” I gazed down at Henry’s peaceful unsuspecting face. Not soon enough.

(First) (Previous) (Next)

[worryinglyinnocent]

Fic: Take Care (5/5)

Well, that only took two years to complete... Please enjoy this conclusion.

Summary: When Rush goes missing for slightly too long and the crew become even more suspicious than they already are, the search for him is cut short by reports from Greer that there is an intruder on the ship. He’s not entirely wrong, but when Chloe recognises their mysterious visitor as Gloria, one person who could definitely, absolutely not ever be on Destiny, things take a turn for the interesting. Is this Destiny testing them again, or is this a cry for help?

Gloria/Rush, with a side of Gloria/Chloe/Rush bromance, sort of…

Set between Trial and Error and The Greater Good, and diverges from there.

[Chapter 1] [Chapter 2] [Chapter 3] [Chapter 4] [AO3]

Chapter 5

Chloe sits by Rush’s bed in the infirmary. TJ has given him the all clear, they just have to wait for him to wake up and get some fluids into him. He looks a lot less like he’s at death’s door now that he’s not covered in blood. It’s obvious that he needs the sleep, so they’re not too worried about waking him up prematurely. Well, the only person who particularly wants to wake him up prematurely is Young, and that’s probably only because he wants to be angry at him. Scratch that, Young is angry at Rush, furiously and incandescently so, because now that the science team have got inside the bridge and started going over its controls with a fine toothed comb, it’s clear that Rush has had control for a while now, and the colonel wonders just how much of what has happened in recent weeks could have been prevented if he had decided to share that information with them rather than keeping it to himself. 

Whilst Rush is unconscious, however, there’s not a lot that Young can do in terms of shouting at him, so he’s taking his frustrations out by pacing up and down the infirmary and occasionally talking to TJ in a harsh whisper that Chloe knows he doesn’t mean for her to hear. He’s not at all happy at her being out of confinement and it seems like he’s even less happy that she’s in here with Rush. From what he’s been saying, he now suspects some kind of a conspiracy between the two of them, and Chloe just rolls her eyes.

Thankfully, whilst TJ wants to smack Rush for keeping the bridge a secret just as much as the rest of them do, she does have Chloe’s back in these arguments, calmly explaining everything that points to Chloe being just as unaware as the rest of them. Young accepts this begrudgingly and resumes his pacing, giving Rush’s comatose body black looks every now and then.

“Colonel, he’s not going to wake up any quicker with you staring at him all the time,” TJ says. “I think that you might be better served elsewhere. I’m sure that the science team will have something to report on the bridge by now. I know you want to yell at him the moment he wakes up, we all do, but with respect, sir, I don’t think there’s a lot to be gained from waiting for that to happen. I’ll call you as soon as he’s awake.”

Young seems to accept this and leaves the infirmary, and the tension in the air immediately lessens to slightly more bearable levels. Chloe looks over at Rush again.

“You’re in so much trouble,” she says conversationally. She wonders if there is something that she ought to be doing, rather than just sitting here. It’s not like she has any duties to perform around the ship that she would be doing instead; she’d just be swapping sitting in the infirmary under military guard to sitting in her room under military guard, so it’s a change of scenery if nothing else. “I think people are going to start lining up to try and kill you soon. You’re lucky I’m here, really.” She doesn’t necessarily want to kill him, but she does want to ask him what the hell he thought he was playing at in keeping them all in the dark for so long.

It’s strange. Chloe’s hand hovers over Rush’s, unsure whether to take it or not. That this strange sequence of events has connected them is irrefutable. They’d had some kind of connection at the hands of their Nakai nightmares before, but the very fact that Destiny itself seems to think that they’re connected has resonance somewhere in the back of Chloe’s mind. The ship wants them to stick together and help each other, and something in her head really wants to listen to it. She knows she’s thinking like Rush now, that the ship is so much older and bigger than the both of them and it does things for a reason, so they probably ought to respect it. She thinks back to what TJ said, about the ship actually caring about them. Maybe it’s caring about her too, giving her excuses and ways to get out and about during her solitary confinement.

She closes her hand over Rush’s. It’s the kind of thing that people do in medical dramas when their terribly ill or injured loved ones are in a critical condition and it’s touch and go for them. It’s not touch and go for Rush, so much. She just knows that there’s no-one else who would do it for him. It’s like Gloria said when she first appeared in her quarters.

No-one else is going to take care of him. Least of all himself.

Whatever strange thing binds them together, whatever link that Destiny has sensed between them, whether as a result of Chloe’s transformation or their shared trauma or something deeper and less definable, it’s there to stay. They are never going to see eye to eye about everything, in fact they’re probably not going to see eye to eye about practically anything, but no matter how much Chloe might want to yell at him, she knows that they understand each other, and perhaps they’re the only people on the ship who share that peculiar level of understanding.

“Thank you.”

Chloe looks up and startles when she sees Gloria standing there. She glances over at TJ, but Gloria shakes her head.

“No, she can’t see me.” There’s a pause. “Eli is running diagnostics on the simulation program from the bridge. I don’t know how long I have. Young wants him to shut it off to prevent any more incidents.”

Well, considering that the simulation program nearly caused Young to have a breakdown when it started testing his leadership skills, Chloe can understand his reluctance to have it running in the background and possibly causing mass hallucinations in his crew. All the same, it makes Chloe wonder.

“So what happens if Rush works himself half to death again?”

Gloria shrugs, perching on the edge of the bed beside her husband. “He’ll just have to accept that he can’t rely on Destiny taking care of him anymore, and he’ll maybe have to take some responsibility for his own wellbeing.”

Her tone is almost motherly, and knowing that she is the ship’s mouthpiece who has taken this view, it makes Chloe laugh. Even Destiny is exasperated by Rush’s workaholic tendencies.

“I did keep telling him to go to sleep,” Gloria continues. “You can imagine how he took that advice. Most of our interactions consisted of me telling him to stop working and him telling me to be quiet.”

Chloe gives a huff of laughter, and she knows what this is building up to. If Destiny can’t take care of Rush, for whatever reason, then this task is going to fall to her. She finds she doesn’t mind. Everyone needs someone to have their back, even Rush, and maybe if he realises that he has a friend and someone looking out for him all the time, then he won’t feel the need to be so damn secretive and manipulative all the time, if he has someone he knows he can trust.

“What if we need you again?” she asks. “I mean, if you’re a manifestation of Destiny itself, then you might be useful to have around.”

Gloria shakes her head. “Not like this. Not this particular form, this shape. I’m too shaped by Rush. But Franklin’s still here too. He’s more likely to provide practical assistance.”

“Franklin?” So that’s where he went when he vanished in the chair. He was uploaded into Destiny’s mainframe.

“Yes. According to Nicholas he’s far more useful than I am.”

They fall into silence for a while, and Chloe takes a few minutes to study the pair of them, Rush’s memories of Gloria watching over him faithfully. It makes her think, just how much Gloria’s death must have affected him, for her to be such a large part of his subconscious now. She remembers the conversation that led to her first realising that Gloria even existed.

“He loves you,” she says. Even though it’s not Gloria and she’s just a construct taking this form for expediency’s sake, it feels important to say it.

Gloria smiles. “I know.”

They fall into silence again. Gloria’s presence seems to be fading, as if it’s taking more and more energy for her to stay here in this form. Whatever Eli’s doing to the simulation program, it’s obviously taking its toll.

“Thank you for rescuing him,” she says presently. “Please keep him safe for me whilst I can’t.”

“I can’t decide whether to hug him or kick his ass,” Chloe mutters. Gloria laughs.

“Don’t worry, that’s a sentiment I can well understand. He’s always been like that.”

Chloe snorts. “Well, at least you admitting it means that he admits it himself. I think.”

Gloria smiles. “Something like that.”

She leans over and kisses Rush gently on the forehead, but Chloe can’t tell if she actually makes contact or not.

“You know where I am if you need me,” she whispers to him, and then she’s gone, and Chloe knows that she won’t be coming back, not unless someone does something to activate the simulation program again. From what Gloria said earlier, back in her room when she was decoding the bridge door, that doesn’t seem likely.

Beside her, Rush twitches as he comes to.

“Glo?” he mumbles.

Chloe shakes her head. “Close, but no cigar. Chloe.”

“Gloria?”

“No. Just me. Sorry.”

He opens bloodshot, weary eyes and looks up at her.

“Gloria was here,” he says. “I heard her.”

“Yeah, she was. She’s gone now, though. I think Eli’s quarantined the program.” Chloe glances over at TJ on the other side of the infirmary; she must have twigged that Rush is awake again but she’s being very good at pretending obliviousness and giving him some time to come round fully before she sics Young on him. Rush nods, and Chloe wonders if he’ll miss her, the simulation who wasn’t really his wife, created from his own memories, his own guilt.

“You were there,” he says. “I heard you. When…”

He doesn’t finish the sentence, but Chloe can fill in the gaps for him. Suddenly, he’s much more alert, looking around himself, as if he’s just realised that he’s not where he was when he passed out.

“Where am I?”

“Infirmary.”

“How did I get here?”

“Kino sled. TJ and I didn’t feel like carrying you all the way here.”

Even looking like death warmed over, he can still give a pretty good ‘don’t be an idiot’ glare, but Chloe just laughs.

“I cracked the code to get into the bridge and came to rescue you from yourself. You’re welcome, by the way.”

“Thank you.” There’s a long pause as reality dawns, and Rush grimaces. “Ah.”

“Yeah, I think ‘ah’ is putting it mildly,” Chloe says. “Young’s about ready to throw you out of an airlock and the rest of us aren’t that far behind. I take it you’ve got some kind of explanation?”

“I do, but my head hurts too much to go into detail right now.”

“Here.” TJ comes over with a cup of water and Rush manages to lever himself into a sitting position and drink. “Not only are you ridiculously exhausted, you’re also even more dehydrated than the rest of us. Now, I promised I’d call Young as soon as you woke up, but I figure I’ll give you a while to make sure you’re fully compos mentis and have all your excuses and explanations lined up before he comes down here.”

Rush nods his appreciation, a little cowed. “Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me yet, you haven’t seen him.”

TJ leaves them alone again then.

“How did you get into the bridge?” Rush asks.

“Gloria helped me. She gave me all the calculations that you’d already done and I was able to work out the rest of it.”

He nods, slowly.

“You know, part of me is really quite worried about how connected you are to this ship,” she points out. “The fact that it can tell when you’re about to keel over and takes it upon itself to get a rescue party together is remarkable.” She raises an eyebrow. “You know, I really think Destiny likes you.”

Rush scoffs, but his expression is thoughtful, and he doesn’t speak for a while. When he does, his words are not at all what Chloe expects.

“You spoke to Gloria.”

“Yes. Well, whatever the strange simulation-come-AI hologram, manifestation of Destiny’s sentience all tied up a bow of your borrowed memories type thing that Gloria is. I find it easier just to call her Gloria.”

“I see.” He pauses again, still lost in thought. “I wonder why she chose you.”

It’s a rhetorical question, and whilst Chloe could see it as an insult, she doesn’t think it is.

“Alien brain to the rescue,” she says. “Super blue knowledge needed to crack open doors.”

They both know that it’s not that, not really, but at the moment, they lack the same depth of understanding of each other that Destiny has of them both. The tentative friendship that they have formed over the past few months has solidified into something now. The past few hours have seen to that, and Chloe feels that she owes it to Gloria - not just the simulation she interacted with but the memory of the woman herself, a person she never met and only knows through another person’s memories - to honour these changing circumstances and take care of Rush in the same roundabout, Rush-like way that he keeps an eye out for her.

“Chloe.” TJ is coming back. “I think it would be best if you went back to your room now.”

Chloe has to agree, because as much as she wants to stick by Rush, she can’t do that if she doesn’t have a clue what’s going on, and being here when Young comes in is probably just going to get the both of them in trouble. Rush nods.

“I can handle Young,” he says, and Chloe just raises an eyebrow.

“Of course you can.”

“If I’m still able to walk after the friendly chat that we’re no doubt about to have, I’ll come and see you,” he says. There’s still a lot for them to talk about, the things that they share that no-one else could even come close to understanding. First their abduction and escape, then the nightmares that continued to link them, and now this final attempt by Destiny to bring them together in an alliance. It’s not something that can be ignored.

“Oh no you won’t,” TJ mutters. “You’re staying where I can keep an eye on you. I don’t want to find you collapsed in a corridor in a couple of hours because you’re too stubborn to admit you’re human.”

Rush huffs, and Chloe laughs, and TJ gives a long-suffering sigh before radioing Dunning to come and escort Chloe back to her quarters and Young to say Rush is ready for the third degree. As she leaves the infirmary, Chloe thinks she gets the briefest glimpse of Gloria out of the corner of her eye, but when she turns, the image is gone.

As worrying a thought as the ship keeping tabs on them is, it is nice to know that it’s taking care of them, and making sure that they take care of each other.

[keep-calm-and-trust-carter]

The Sound of Music

Summary: http://www.en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Sound_of_Music_(film)#Plot 

Thoughts: 

Before we start, this is the first time I’ve watched this since Charmian Carr’s death, so:

Rest in peace Charmian Carr. You were a wonderful Liesl. 

While I admit it's pretty, the beginning of this movie has always bored me.

I wonder how I would react to this movie if it was the first time I was seeing it.

So I got curious as to what order the nuns belong to, so I looked up Nonnberg Abbey. Apparently they're Benedictine.

"Some people would call that honesty." I love the Reverend Mother.

I'm with Maria. Seven children is a lot. Not Duggar-levels of crazy by any means, but damn.

"I have always longed for adventure" Then WHY THE FUCK are you trying to become a nun?

Before I understood how musicals worked, I always thought of how annoying it must be to be on a bus with someone who was singing. Loudly.

You know, I never thought about it, but what does Captain von Trapp do all day when he’s not off in Vienna?

If the children have had twelve governesses in a few years (since Gretl’s only 5) that means that something’s wrong with the children, dude. Like, for instance, they’re little hellbeasts.

I didn’t realise when I was younger how much of a little shit Maria is. And I love her for it.

Well she just showed her soft underbelly…

I will never stop wondering how the fuck that frog got into her pocket without her noticing until then. Or how one of the children managed to keep a frog a secret during the introductions 

Liesl, you are so not subtle. Why do you think your father had them lock the doors earlier than usual?

I don’t know if there was ever a time I was ever anything but meh about this scene. Maria/Georg was always my ship of choice.

I just realized that we do not see Frau Schmidt at all after this scene in Maria’s bedroom.

Okay, I could understand Gretl, Marta, and maybe Brigitta (and that one’s a stretch) being scared of the thunderstorm. But Kurt, Friedrich, and Louisa? Not a chance. Louisa and Friedrich are teenagers, and Kurt, even if he were scared, wouldn’t want to show it.

I get that it was a plot device. That doesn’t mean it wasn’t a stupid one.

I love how they had Marta and Gretl – the former in particular – rush to make sure they were close to Maria. They’re the ones least likely to remember anything about their mother, plus they’re rather young, so they’d be the ones to latch on to the first person to show them affection.

This song, like “Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious,” just makes me smile.

“Only during thunderstorms, sir.” I love Maria.

I wonder how long it took to sew those clothes, and what Maria and the children did in the meantime. It also does suggest a long absence on the Captain’s part.

With their father being gone all the time and them going through governesses like tissue paper, I’d imagine that Liesl was a second mother to Marta and Gretl.

I’ve noticed that in the Do Re Mi number Gretl’s constantly trying to catch up to the other children. The poor kid has such short legs a lot of times she can’t even get somewhere to do the choreography before she has to go somewhere else.

I’m glad they had the older children (Liesl-Kurt) do most of the jumping up/down stairs. They’d be more likely to keep their balance.

I think they do set up pretty well that, at least before he reconnects with his children, Georg and Elsa are pretty well suited for each other.

When I was little, I didn’t know why Georg and Elsa needed a chaperone, since they were adults. I get it now.

Rolfe’s kind of an idiot. Oh, just gonna ride up and start throwing pebbles at the window, not even check to see if there’s anyone there. Which there very clearly was.

Oh that was about the worst person you could have said “Heil Hitler” to

“What’s going to happen’s going to happen. Just make sure it doesn’t happen to you.” That makes me cringe more than it used to. For...reasons. 

The Baroness looks more amused than annoyed at the children talking over one another after they fall in the lake. While I don’t appreciate her boarding school comment later in the film, she at least doesn’t have the “new stepmother hating the children” cliché.

Say what you will about the Baroness, she knows how to pick up on social cues and get the hell out of there before the yelling starts

“Mmhmm, and having a marvelous time.” I love this little shit.

“The little ones just want to be loved.” That is just sad. And it explains how quickly and fiercely they took to Maria.

I do not like the puppet scene. I’m not exactly sure why.

The VHS version I grew up with was full screen, so when Maria first tries to hand Georg the guitar I only saw her arms. They’re nice arms and everything, but still. 

I love this song. It’s one of my favorite songs in the movie. It helps that the Captain and Maria are making goo-goo eyes at each other.

I could play the Landler dance over and over

I don’t really like the Baroness’s dress. It’s the color. And how fucking shiny it is.

I like how they kept the “Brigitta notices everything” thing. Like it wasn’t just a one-off comment. She’s the one who comments on Maria’s blushing, and you can see her watching the interactions between Maria, the Captain, and the Baroness.

Apparently Nicholas Hammond had to go through numerous painful dye jobs to get the blond hair Friedrich has. And I will never stop wondering why. Liesl, Brigitta and Marta all have dark hair. Hell, the Captain has dark hair. The gene for dark hair is dominant. He could have kept his brown hair and no one would have cared.

“If the Nazis take over Austria, I have no doubt, Herr Zeller, that you will be the entire trumpet section.” It took me a while to understand that particular insult.

“How clumsy of me. I meant to accuse you.” Herr Zeller’s gonna need a lot of ice after that one.

I used to really hate the Baroness for interfering with the Captain and Maria. Now, I realize that she probably cares a great deal for the Captain, and may even love him. The Captain called her his savior. She brought meaning back into his life. That’s a big thing. And then a younger woman comes in and starts to ruin it. Like I still don’t like her much, but I kind of understand where she’s coming from. It’s mean and underhanded, but not crazy or supervillainy

You know, Maria might have just gone back to the Abbey in September without the Baroness saying anything. I think she was in denial about being in love with the Captain, and probably would have stayed that way. The Reverend Mother notices something because A) Maria came back early, B) she’s in seclusion and C) the von Trapp children clearly adore her. Now maybe she would have noticed something anyway, but the Baroness pushed things along. Whoops.

“He’ll get over it soon enough I should think. Men do, you know.” Yep, didn’t get this one as a child either.

Yeah this was a really shitty thing to do. She probably didn’t want anyone trying/probably succeeding in getting her to stay, but still, shitty thing to do. The poor kids.

I give the Baroness a bit of credit for at least trying to bond with the children.

Yeah the boarding school thing is where she loses major points. And I’m a bit peeved that Max is cool about it.

And this will be imitated by all catty – usually blonde – future stepmothers and their (usually stereotypically) gay best friend. And it will never be done as well. Because the Baroness is not a terrible person. She cares about Georg and at least tries to bond with the children. And seven children is a lot, even Maria said so. And she bows out gracefully when it’s clear she’s lost. Most of her imitators don’t seem to have any of that going for them.

Yeah idk if Max is or was even coded to be gay. But it wouldn’t surprise me.

And that’s probably why the boarding school thing bugs me so much. Because it’s usually gold-digging, conniving, horrible women who don’t actually care about their fiancé or the children (and usually have to deal with fewer anyway) who say it.

I’ve read the Captain’s nonchalance as put on, given how he reacts when Maria comes back.

I wonder how long it’s been since Maria left. Probably not more than a few days. Yeah, Georg proposed rather…quickly then.

OMG MAX’S FACE when all the children are kissing the Baroness.

The Reverend mother was about to straight up cut a bitch when she though the von Trapps were unkind to Maria

I fucking love the Reverend Mother.

“It’s been so cold lately they turned blue.” What the fuck, Friedrich?

I’m pretty sure he knows exactly where they were.

Yeah, a villa in the south of France would not do well in a couple of years. Vichy France and all.

Well at least he’s being honest and ending it before it gets too far gone.

Yeah even when I was a kid I was like why are you singing, you could be doing better things.  

Okay, I can understand Georg and the pinecone thing, but Maria and the whistle is bullshit.

That veil is long.

Holy tonal shift. But yeah, I get kinda bored after the Nazis show up. I did not come here for Nazis.

I kind of love that Frau Schmidt was like “fuck you” to the Nazis. Not directly, but still.

Yeah, a month is a really long honeymoon. They’ve got to be getting a bit sore by now…

And I want you to know that I felt very weird typing that about a movie I first saw when I was like five

“Maybe the flag with the black spider on it makes people nervous.” The flag with the black spider on it makes people very nervous.

It will never not bug me that they got Brigitta’s and Kurt’s names switched on the program, order-wise.

“We make it our business to know everything about everyone.” That’s…horrifying.

YAS CAPTAIN VON TRAPP RIPPING THE NAZI FLAG.

"And you belong to him…” I know this is the 1960s being the 1930s, but…yuck.

I’m kinda wondering how Georg and Maria managed to learn their festival singing parts so quickly.

I’d say it was stupid for them to go to the Abbey, as that’s the first place the Nazis would look, but they didn’t really have anywhere else to go.

"It’s you we want, not them.” Bullshit. You don’t think the Nazis would hold his family hostage to make sure he did what he was told?

“You’ll never be one of them.” So not the right thing to say.

“Reverend Mother, I have sinned.” “I too, Reverend Mother.” I love this part.

Somehow, I think this is a sin that God could live with.  

Fun fact: the real von Trapps escaped via train to Italy, then London, then got to the US. I think they settled in Vermont. Walking over the Alps would most likely get them to Germany, not Switzerland. 

Fun Stuff:

Should I Actually Watch This? (especially for movies that are considered “Classics”)

I recommend it. I mean, if you don’t like movie musicals, you probably won’t like it, because there’s a metric shit ton of songs, and it is a bit sweet and sentimental, so there’s that. But it’s a damn good movie. 

Biggest Plot Contrivance: 

 The thunderstorm. They aren’t gonna convince me that all of the older children are scared of thunderstorms. 

Biggest WTF Adaptation Change: 

Having them escape via train and ship would have been plenty dramatic and wouldn’t have ended them up in Germany. 

Favorite Character: 

Maria. She’s compassionate and kind but not afraid to call people on their BS. 

Biggest Shithead: 

Herr Zeller. Rolf is a very close second. 

Favorite Song: 

“My Favorite Things.” “Edelweiss” is a close second.  

Least Favorite Song:

The Lonely Goatherd. No question. That scene is just not one of my favorites.