#yeah lol the hypochondria has decided i have terminal illness sorry everyone it’s over 😔✌️
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i have said before i have really bad hypochondria anyway i was doing better on my meds but recently i was really badly triggered bc my lymph nodes r swollen & one of them is like more swollen than the others & now i have white spots on my tonsils which indicates a throat infection not really a terminal illness but having a lump on my throat has been like my biggest hypochondria fear for 10 yrs or so so having a lump on my neck has really just like sent me & anyway i usually do not share my hypochondria fears bc ik they’re irrational but as i said this is like 100x more upsetting to me than usual bc it is my exact hypochondria fear so i had a breakdown & started crying to my mom so she made me get a doctor’s appt all this to say that i also have severe avoidance issues so before i could just pretend the bump wasn’t there & distract myself but now that i know i have a doctor’s appt it is much worse & i can’t stop thinking abt it 😔 thats my story. plagued in many ways.
#michelle speaks#like i don’t have any like congestion or a sore throat. even tho like i CLEARLY have an infection in my throat#bc my tonsils have so many white dots on them 😭 idk when that happened tho. i noticed my lymph nodes were swollen like 4 days ago or smth#but like normally my hypochondria is just me checking to make sure i don’t have symptoms like a lump & feeling better when i dont#so like having one there has put me in like a constant state of anxiety it has been so bad.#i never EVER go to the dr over my hypochondria fears bc 1. i know they’re just fears and 2. avoidance issues#but like this is the worst one ive had since early 2020 and this time i cant reassure myself bc the lump stays 😭#i was going to say i don’t think i have a terminal illness but i would be lying actually i think i’m going to die within the yr tbh.#my symptoms do lean more towards mono than terminal illness but 😔 u know how it is for me. at least i’ll always exist on tumblr 😩#yeah lol the hypochondria has decided i have terminal illness sorry everyone it’s over 😔✌️
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