#yeah if you really wanna see me air my thoughts (and feel really scared as i put myself out on the internet) try to find me on mspfa.

[mattsjuul]

eye contact. matt sturniolo.

༣ summary: you and your bf are in bed watching a movie he suggested but all you can think about is how good he looks. and how he’d look even better looking down at you as you blow him.

༣ pairing: bf!matt sturniolo x fem!reader

༣ warnings: oral sex (male receiving), pet names (baby, princess, beautiful idk), light smut it’s just a bj, making out, he tastes his own cum… also not proof read!! sorryyyy lol im too scared to re read..

༣ author’s note: okay so this is like.. my first smut..! so im nervy and only have the guts to do a blowjob sooo take it or leave it! pls lmk if it sucks. love u 💐

you and matt are currently sat up in bed, him a little lower down than you. meaning you’re able to admire him without him noticing. and if there’s one thing you can always do, it’s admire your boyfriend. look at his pretty eyes. his plump pink lips. his veiny hands. his toned arms. just, everything about him. in your eyes he’s perfect.

today, though. he was in a grey tank top and plaid pajama pants. and oh how you adored how he looks in tank tops. his hairs wet from the shower, he’s fidgeting with your fingers, his slim hands looking extremely good. if it were up to you, his pants would be off and you’d have him down your throat. but you’re far too shy for that. right?

your thoughts get interrupted once you see him look away from his tv and at you. “you okay?” he giggles. “no, yeah, sorry” you blush, looking at the tv. “nah baby. what’s distracting you?” he asks, sitting higher up. “nothing” well, him of course. but no way could you admit that. “you sure?” he glances at your lips as the words leave his mouth. which just makes this way harder for you. “what do you think is distracting me, matt?” you ask with genuine curiosity. “well since you’ve watched about a minute of this entire movie, i’d say i am.” he says and you shyly smile. “a little” you shrug. “a little?” he asks and you confidently nod. “alright. what do you wanna do?” he asks and your eyes widen at the question, not expecting it. “um. nothing” i say. “we both know that’s not true.” he replies. you look him up and down, making a smirk form on his lips.

“you wanna touch me, hm?” he hums. your mouth gaps open, your mind going crazy thinking about what the fuck to say back. “yeah.” you say, your heart ready to beat out of your chest. “i’m all yours” he adjusts himself, grabbing your waist to pull you onto his lap. you shyly kiss him, almost immediately deepening it. and after a bit of very lovingly making out, you start lifting his shirt up. so he takes the sign and helps you get it off. you kiss down his neck, leaving hickeys on the way down to his collarbone. you pull away and he flashes you a soft smile, really easing your nerves. blow jobs really weren’t your thing. you never really know how to get into them. but whenever you did, matt adored it.

you move down, sitting on your knees between his legs. you look up at him for approval, him giving you a little nod in response. you untie his plaid pants and nervously pull them down enough to reveal his hard dicks print through his underwear. your heart skips a beat, seeing pre-cum leaking through his grey boxers. you palm him a bit, making a moan like breath leave his lips. you smile, liking that what you’re doing is making him feel good.

matt gives you a certain look, seemingly getting impatient. and he truly was. his heart was racing seeing you, having you, down there about to make him feel incredible, like you never fail to do. you finally pull his boxers down, enough to reveal his hard dick. and goodness was he ready. he shivers a bit at the sudden cold air on his throbbing dick, his rooms floor always extra chilly. he takes a deep breath, seconds before your spit lands on his tip. his breath hitches, eyes shutting for a second, kind of in preparation. you finally begin spreading it, needing to use both hands on his long, slim, dick. he moves his hands, pushing your hair away from your face.

"mmmhm. already doing so good." he mumbles. matt loves making sure you feel safe. like you never have to worry about how good your work truly is. you finally beat your nerves and your lips land around his tip, quickly looking up to see how he reacts. matts always looking at you. no matter what. oral sex, normal sex, all the time. and he will always find a way to. he has countless videos of the two of you on his phone. anyways. a deep breath leaves his lips, one he didnt even know he was holding. you go deeper, gaining confidence. "mm-fuck dont push yourself.. too much.. princess." he breathes out, struggling to even talk.

you keep bobbing your head, your eyes watering as you try not to gag. meanwhile matt's not keeping in his moans. the more you guys do anything, the more vocal he gets. "fuck fuck fuck.. so.. fucking good." he moans, slightly tugging your hair, poorly holding it back at this point. you decide to toughen up and finally take in all of him. "shhhiiiiit baby" he squeezes his eyes shut, thrusting his hips up a bit. "so close." he barely says as you go back up, hallowing your cheeks at his tip. he lets out another porno like moan, his dick starting to do little twitches. he really is close. you guys lock eyes, so he takes it as a sign to lightly face fuck you. he looks so fucking good. he starts lightly thrusting his hips while also guiding your head and you just let him. his moans fill the room, along with the sounds of your mouth on his wet dick while theres spit going down your chin and onto his balls. he starts letting out big, cut off like moans, never looking away from you. "coming princess.." he barely mumbles, before moaning your name as his warm cum spirts into your mouth. you pump him a little as his white liquid fills your mouth, him biting his lip so hard, he might draw blood.

"i swear.. i always think ive felt the best ever and you always prove me wrong the next time." he says, catching his breath as you swallow his cum. you smile in return, shyly wiping your mouth with the back of your hand. "c'mere" he pulls you up after pulling his pants n boxers up. he grabs a random shirt of his off of the ground and wipes your face. "i love you." he whispers, making your smile come back. "i love you." you reply.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ a/n: omg i yap so so so much LMAO. this was so so scary to write.. hope u enjoy aaahhhh. lmk what i can do to make this better tho!! ♡

[mooniladragon]

per my last post...

that's right.

im gonna read homestuck^2. i heard it sucks. i just ended day one of me reading it. in my opinion, it does.

DISCLAIMER

please dont hurt me for what i think about it im not attacking your opinions im stating my own... please.. im only an extremely self-aware and mature fourteen-and-a-half year old.. wah

[dixonsstinkysock]

It’s Temporary

AN: This was going to be a random blurb but I’m too into this and he’s such a dork. Guys don’t tell anyone but I kinda wanna write smut, I’m not going to because I’m scared but y’know.

(Heavily inspired by a bot on C.AI, pretty sure the user is @/zetali_09 so if you see this i love you.)

Warnings: Swearing, mention of an apartment blowing up….suggestive???

Set during Season 1, before the timeskip…

The cold, Upper city, night air chilled you to the core. The dark streets only illuminated by the few street lights scattered here and there. You wrap your cloak around you a little tighter as you made your way to the meeting spot. Making a sharp turn down a dark alleyway, you narrowly miss a couple of enforcers doing their nightly rounds.

Leaning against the cool, damp, brick wall. Enjoying the noises of the city, letting time pass by as you wait for your companion. Around a half an hour later, you hear heavy footsteps and the soft click of the high-cost, well made shoes echoing throughout the alley. You recognized those steps, he saved up for a long time to purchase those shoes, no way could you forget them. You open your eyes, turning towards the culprit of the noise. “Took you long enough, thought I was gonna rot out here.” You smiled at the shadowed man, stepping into the moonlight.

“Sorry, had a few things to finish up with my work. Left later than I expected…”

You walk up to him, trapping him into one if your famous bear hugs. An unfamiliar scent wafts from him, its sweet…it’s expensive. Definitely not his signature cologne smell—no, something different. You both stay there for a moment, enjoying the new company. Everything seems to fade away when your with him, it’s like he’s the cure to your disease.

“Been a while since we last talked—“

“Yeah, I…” You pull back, looking Jayce in the eyes. “I’m sorry. There’s been alot going on.”

His hands come up to your face, gently caressing it. He’s always gentle with you, a contrast from the rough, dangerous streets you grew up in.

“Hey…What’s going on?” His voice is soft and smooth, with the occasional voice crack, it’s not fair. His looks already make him desirable, but hearing him talk to you with that tone? Drooling.

“It’s my siblings, they’ve been getting into more and more trouble.” You fully pull away from him, turning towards the lit up entrance of the alleyway. “It’s like Vi doesn’t even realize how bad things can really get.”

“Hey—“ He takes a step foward, gently grabbing your shoulders and turning you to him. “I’m here. I’m here to help—with anything. We’ll figure this out okay?”

A bittersweet smile graces your lips, you close your hand over his placed on your shoulder.

“You don’t know the Undercity, Jayce. I don’t think there’s anything you can do to help me on this one…”

The two of you stood there, unspeaking. You can practically hear the gears burning inside Jayce’s head. You can almost smell the smoke coming from them, It’s obvious he’s thinking of ways to try and help you and your family. After a moment, you rest your head onto his chest, defeated, and looking for comfort.

“I can’t let you risk you life for this. You have too much ahead of you.”

You feel his arms wrap around you, bringing you closer. He buries his face into your hair, breathing in your scent.

“There is nothing ahead of me without you.” You lock your arms around him, holding back a few tears. Jayce feels you taking fast, deep breaths, attempting to keep your composure. It’s all been alot, apparently your kid siblings were being nosy—blew up some guys apartment. Now every enforcer in Piltover is searching for them. You take a deep breath, leaning up straight to face him again.

“I won’t let you risk your life for me…risk your future—”

“I’m not some idiot throwing himself into danger for fun! I’m protecting someone I love.”

That. That catches you off guard. Yes, you two have been messing around every other night, cuddling after, speaking soft sweet words to each other…but love? He didn’t really love you did he? You’re from the Undercity. The scum of the scum. He’s from the top, he’s perfect. No way he actually means this…does he?

“I’m choosing to do this because I care about you, I care about your family. You aren’t alone in this, no matter how much you think you are.”

Time stops for what feels like hours, you gaze into his eyes, trying to find some kind of sign to tell you he isn’t being true. You can’t. His caramel eyes look gold from the street lights, determined and dead set on aiding you. You let your head fall onto his chest again, giving him your unspoken permission to help with your situation.

“I just realized I didn’t ask about how you’ve been.”

His arms tighten around your body, gently rocking you both back and forth. “Ha…” Jayce lets out a breathy chuckle, preparing himself to recount the most recent and life changing events. “It’s been different…Some guys blew up my apartment.”

You freeze. There’s no way they did that. It can’t be the same apartment right? How many apartments blow up in Piltover? Oh my god. My siblings blew up his fucking apartment. “Uh…” You can’t even form a sentence, still shocked at the new information. What are you going to tell him—

“Everything okay?”

“Yeah—are you okay? You’re fucking apartment blew up!” You pull back from him, facing him again. Your hands find their place on his waist, trying to ground yourself after what you were just told.

“My back’s still a little sore but I’m fine.”

“How much did you lose?” His mood darkened, eyes darting to the ground. “Alot.” You take a deep breath, This shouldn’t have happened. He is a good man, maybe a little crazy sometimes but—good. This whole thing is a mess. Jayce doesn’t know your sisters are the ones who blew up his apartment, you can’t go and get onto them for this because they don’t know you’re with him. You’re stuck, with no one to go to, maybe Vander but…he’d get upset that you’re up here with a topsider. Just so happens, he’s the same topsider your sisters were targeting.

This is fucking stupid.

After giving him your apologies, you realize it’s getting light. You should start heading back home, hopefully without Vander noticing you were gone.

“Jayce, It’s getting early. I gotta start heading back…”

“So soon..?” He smiles, he’s clearly up to something as he brings his hands up to your jaw. The sun is slowly rising, changing the sky into beautiful hues of orange and blue.

“Have to get back before Vander wakes up, I do not wanna hear that lecture.”

“Do you have to? Maybe you could…stay with me?”

“Stay…Topside. With you.”

“Yeah, I mean we could spend the day together. Go and do something…” He takes your hands into his own, engulfing them. You take a moment to think about his request. It’d be fun spending time with him, you’d be able to really enjoy his company. Not waiting for something or someone to come out of the shadows, trying to rob you or worse.

“Okay…What did you have in mind?” A smug look slowly plagues his face as he takes your hands into his, leading you out of the alley and in the direction of his temporary home.

“Trust me?”

You grip his hands tighter, letting him lure you into whatever devious plan he’s set up.

“Maybe…”

Two shadows danced against the stone road, slowly disappearing as the sun rose higher into the sky. One by one, doors open, carriages roll by, and the occasional stray kid runs in front of you two. None of that matters, not when his callused, warm hands are handling you so gently. When he looks at you like you’re his world…like he can’t live without you.

It definitely doesn’t matter when he pulls you into his hotel, hands roaming each others clothed figures as he closes the door behind you.

Guys…Part 2?? What y’all think 😈

[cosmicpearlz]

my love is mine, all mine (pt 2)

summary: more glimpses of your relationship with jude!

pairing: jude bellingham x reader

a/n: i’m having too much fun writing these scenarios lol

~one~

you rarely ever get into arguments with jude but when it does happen, it’s terrible on everyone’s part. this particular moment was about him not spending enough time with you.

“so you’re saying i can’t hangout with my friends? because that’s what it’s sounding like.”

“jude, that’s not what i’m saying! i’m just saying that it would be nice to have a day with just us. i feel like i’m left on a back burner right now.”

“we do hangout. i mean, i’m here right now but you wanna spend the time arguing!”

“tell me the last time we had a day to ourselves! please enlighten me,” you were beyond frustrated and your head was hurting from all the yelling.

“stop being so fucking clingy. i see you at home every night! we don’t need to be together 24/7.”

you felt your heart throbbing from the pain of hearing those words. is it really such a crime to want quality time with someone you love? between his training sessions and your job, there hasn’t been much alone time.

“okay. my apologies for wanting my boyfriend here with me. i won’t ask again,” you took a step back, looking down to possibly stop the tears. it didn’t work. the more you thought about it, the more it hurt.

jude instantly regretted saying that. he understood completely where you were coming from but the stubbornness in him clouded his judgement.

“baby, i’m-“

“i don’t wanna talk to you jude.”

-

it’s been hours since he last saw you. jude already made the guest room into his bed for the night and found himself restless. he wouldn’t admit it to anyone else but he couldn’t sleep without you near. even if you guys weren’t cuddling, at least his hand could be on you in some way. so he tossed and turned until he had enough.

jude makes his way to the room door, raising his hand to knock when the door swings open. it startles the both of you. leaving you to stare at each other in silence. jude noticed the dry tear streaks that laid on the apple of your cheeks. it made him feel worse.

“you really hurt-“

“i’m sorry bab-“

speaking at the same time wasn’t uncommon for you two, causing the both of you to let out a breathy laugh.

“you can go first honey,” his light whisper fell into the air as if he were too scared to talk any louder.

“jude, you really hurt my feelings earlier. i just wanted to spend time with you and you made it seem like i was asking for a million dollars or something bigger. i didn’t feel heard during our conversation but unfortunately i can’t sleep without you. so i was coming to drag you to bed even though i’m still very mad at you.”

“baby i’m sorry. i’m so sorry for hurting your feelings. i want you to know that i don’t mean it. hell, everyone knows i’m the clingy one! you’re the love of my life and i would spend days mending whatever hurt i caused,” his hands came to rest on your cheeks, fingers softly swiping at the dry tear stains.

“can we go to bed now? i’m exhausted and we can finish talking in the morning,” jude nods in response to you and kisses your nose.

“yeah, let’s go to bed m’love.”

~two~

“hey babe!”

jude looks up from his ipad upon hearing your voice through the phone. he was in germany for match and of course, he asked you to go with him. saying something along the lines of being his good luck charm. you couldn’t originally get the off time from your job.

“i miss you so much.”

“jude, baby you’ve been gone for like two days.”

“and your point is?”

“okay, whatever you say. anyways, i got a package for ya! just open the door.”

the boy failed to realize how close your face was in the camera and how you whispered. you had surprised him by coming to germany, being that your boss changed her mind and let you go. it wasn’t like you asked for off time a lot anyways.

“what?”

“can you open the door baby?”

jude jumps off the bed and practically leaps to the door. swinging it open to find you with a toothy smile. he rushes to hug you, bending down to your hight and pulling you into his arms.

“you said you couldn’t come!”

“surprise! my boss decided to let me take the time off last minute. i found the first flight here.”

“how’d you get to the hotel? i would’ve picked you up.”

“it wouldn’t have been a surprise then.”

he detaches himself from you to grab your bag, then grabbing your hand, walking you inside. you take a seat on the couch that was sitting in the room and smiled as your boyfriend put your bag next to his.

“i can’t believe you’re here.”

“well believe it,” jude sat next to you and began pressing kisses into whatever inch of skin he could get to.

“babe relax,” you say, in between giggles as he continued his work down to your neck. only getting off you when you pushed his shoulder back.

“i just missed you.”

“it’s been two days!”

“so what.”

~three~

you’ve become familiar with jude being your passenger princess. you never minded, it was just nice having someone to drive with. so, you took him on another one of your side quests. thrifting.

“i hope i find something good this time. last time we went, it was a bunch of bullshit.”

“i’m kinda hoping i see something i like,” you gasp into response to him, quickly looking at him and then looking back at the road.

“woah, thee jude bellingham is interested in thrifting?”

“oh come off it.”

“i’m just saying! i literally never heard you say anything like that. just making sure my ears heard correctly,” you give him a teasing smile.

“i will jump into oncoming traffic.”

“no you won’t.”

“i swear i will.”

“i’m calling your bluff.”

the silence in the car became loud as you both tested one another.

“no i won’t.”

“ha! i knew it.”

“whatever, drive faster loser. all the good stuff are gonna be gone.”

~four~

you wake up finding the bed empty. jude’s side is made up, totally not uncommon. you figured he was at training and got out of bed to get something to eat. as you walked to the kitchen, you find your boyfriend with his bare back towards you.

“good morning darling,” he turns his head to face you with a small smile.

“good morning. what’s all this?”

“i wanted to cook for you! training was canceled today because of a family emergency. i was gonna surprise you in bed but of course you had to wake up early.”

“that’s very sweet of you,” you make your way towards him and wrap your arms around his waist. pressing your front into his back, hugging him as tight as you could. you leaned up to kiss the back of his shoulder blade before stepping away.

“let’s spend the day inside.”

“are you sure jude? i know today is my off day but you don’t have to stay in with me.”

“i want to.”

jude plates the food and sits it on the dining room table. you follow close behind and go to grab your chair. instead, jude pulls out your chair for you. pushing you in before pressing a kiss to the top of your head. sitting down next to you, you both began to eat. a comfortable silence fills the room as you both ate. his free hand resting on your thigh, caressing the skin beneath his fingers.

“i love you so much. thank you for this.”

“you shouldn’t have to thank me. i’m your boyfriend, it’s a job of mine to make sure you’re feeling loved at all times.”

“trust me, i feel all the love right now.”

“it still wouldn’t be enough to express how much i truly am in love with you darling.”

“don’t get sappy on me bellingham,” you teased, watching his face attempt to hide a smile.

“oh we wouldn’t want that,” he plays along and kisses your cheek, making you both laugh in the process.

[brooooswriting]

Hey! Would be interested in R joining Essex after Leighton is already out and R is closeted. Would love to see how Leighton deals with it when she was just as closeted. Thanks<3

Oh I know

Being gay wasn’t fun, not when you were scared to tell people and had to hide who you really are. You hated it in high school which was why you made a plan for college. Since you despised the thought of coming out you decided to just go to a frat party and make out with a girl. Boom! Everybody would know and it would be fine.

Well, turns out you were too shy to do that. You went there extremely confident with your roommates but you ended up only chatting with some new people before getting drunk with your friends. At the end of the night you met a nice girl that was one year above you, Whitney.

Somehow Whitney kinda adopted you. She took you everywhere, made you meet her roommates and willow. It was nice really, Bella was hilarious, Kimberly was so caring it was crazy and Leighton, well Leighton was unhinged but so damn hot.

Seems like Leighton had a great gaydar because after meeting you like three or four times she decided to get you alone at the next frat party. When you went outside to catch some fresh air you suddenly felt a hand on your waist making you jump. Just as you were about to start a fight with the person you noticed that it was Leighton. “Hey” you mumbled out with a small blush covering your face.

“Hey” she just stared at you for a moment making the blush even worse. “So, what do you think we get out of here?” You choked on the sip you just drank, avoiding eye contact.

“I- uhm. How’d -how do you know that I’m…you know?” You whispered, your eyes flicking around to make sure that nobody would hear you.

“I used to be like you, a little richer and a lot less shy but I can tell when you look at me” you were about to scream when she bit her lip while looking you up and down “so, wanna get outta here?” This time you nodded, quickly pulling Leighton away.

What was meant to be a one night stand turned into a lot more, it was hard to see you and Leighton apart. If it was in private you were always with her and if it was outside you were always with the her and her roommates. Every time you saw a gay couple walk down the street you wished it could be like this with you two but the thought of coming out makes you shiver in anxiety.

“Damn look, this is such a good TikTok for the sorority” Leighton said as she came back to you, her phone in hand. She turned it to you so you could watch it. “I am definitely going to post that. It’s the perfect mix between rich, hot, sexy and perfect” she explained further. While you hated to admit it, because she was, just like Bella pathological overconfident, it was true. She was wearing expensive shit, her hair was slightly messy from your activities and her lip sync and movements were nailed.

“Wait, did you already post that?” You suddenly panicked, staring at the phone trying to figure out if she did.

“Yeah why?” Her voice was so normal and unbothered which nearly made you snap. It would be stupid to snap at her as she didn’t see the problem but in that moment you were just too in your head. I mean we are talking about THE Leighton Murray, that video would have thousands of views before you could do anything.

“You HAVE to delete that!!” You quickly said, trying to figure out how to do that.

“No, why would I? It’s perfect” she argued taking the phone from you.

“Because my letterman jacket is in the back! With my name on it and some cloths beneath!” You explained pointing to the problem which made her sigh.

“We are always together, people won’t figure out that this means anything” she first said, but when she looked at your panicked state she stepped back. “I’m sorry, I’ll delete it” she quickly did that before setting the phone down.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you feel like I don’t care about your feelings because I do and I get how you’re feeling. When I was still in the closet my ex flipped every time it came to this. We broke up because I made her take down a picture where you could see an inch of my bag” she laughed slightly at the end to ease some of the tension.

“I really want to show people that I’m with you, you know that right? It’s not that I’m embarrassed about it, I just don’t want everybody to see me differently” you explained as you laid back into her arms, your teary eyes breaking her heart.

“I know, I get it. You do it on your timeline and if you want any help coming out just tell me” she stroked your back and pressed a kiss to your lips. Your lips chased hers as she pulled away.

“Are you sure that this isn’t too much for you?” Alicia asked, she didn’t know who Leigh was seeing but she knew that there was someone. They had decided to become friends again after a while as Leighton had to do charity work again. “I mean you’ve just come out of the closet and now it’s like you’re back in it again. She’s pulling you back in the closet and it’s not looking good on you” she added.

The blonde had to take a deep breath to calm down because otherwise she would have killed Alicia. There was no way she was going to talk bad about you and try to make her break up with you. “Look, in contrast to you I don’t break up with her over her being scared. I’ll give her the support and love she needs to show the world that she’s a badass bitch and if I ever see you talking to her or about her like that you’re gonna have a problem” with that Leighton stormed off to your dorm.

“Hey, is y/n there? I’m here for math tutoring” the blonde said, a disgusted look in her face to make it look like she was really coming for that. Your roommates didn’t know and if she came here happily instead of annoyed they would have known something was off. The youngest Murray wasn’t known for being happy and nice to everyone that walked her way.

“Yeah, she’s in her room. Just knock, she’s alone here. The rest of us got class. So bye” your roommate rushed out, clearly scared of the girl. Leighton bit her lip to hide her grin as she walked past the girl and to your room. After a quick knock she let herself in to a surprised you.

As soon as the door closed her hands grabbed your waist to pull you into her, her lips joining yours seconds later. The kiss was fast and heated as you could barely keep up, your arms wrapped around her neck while hers went under your shirt but they stayed on your naked waist. By now you realized that this wasn’t sexual, no it was Leighton trying to find reassurance.

Once you both ran out of breath you pulled away, a dreamy look on your face while there was a concerned one on hers. “What’s wrong?” You asked as your hand cupped her cheek, your thumb rubbing over her skin softly.

“Please tell me that you don’t feel pressured to come out by me. That I’ve been supportive and made you feel good about yourself” you were shocked, you had never seen her so insecure and desperate.

“Hey, where’s all this coming from? Of course you’ve been supportive, you never made me feel like I had to come out and I’m so thankful for that. What made you feel like you didn’t?” You asked as you pulled her to your bed, you rested again the headboard so Leighton could lay between your legs with her head on your chest.

“I had a talk with Alicia about us, she didn’t know that it’s you but that I’m with a girl who’s closeted and she started to talk shit about how it, about how hard it was to be a with someone who is closeted and shit. I got so mad because that’s what she left me for but now that I’m with you I don’t get it at all. I don’t think being in the closet with you is hard” she confessed and even though you tensed up at the name of her ex you couldn’t help but smile at her monologue.

“It’s okay, I’m sorry she made you feel like that. But you? Damn girl, you’re awesome and I’m happy that you’re my girl” you grinned as you said the corniest line you could think of.

“God, that was disgusting. Never say something like that again” she complained making both of you laugh as she snuggled closer.

“So, my roommates isn’t coming home tonight. Do you maybe wanna sleep over?” You asked as you rested your chin on top of her head.

“Yeah, why not”

———————————————————————————

Part 2 of reader coming out?

[steddieas-shegoes]

i love you enough

for @steddieholidaydrabbles prompt 'roadtrip/vacation' rated m wc: 995 cw: nightmare, implied sexual content tags: friends to lovers, getting together, love confessions, first kiss, loosest way to reference vacation is staying in a hotel

------------------------------------

"Steve...Steve!"

His eyes opened wide as Eddie's hands shook him awake.

"Jesus Christ, man. I thought I'd have to push you off the bed," Eddie sighed, his hold on Steve's shoulders loosening but not going away.

"Sorry," Steve gasped, his breath caught in his chest like he was about to have a panic attack.

This nightmare had been different.

Instead of Robin dying under the mall, it was Eddie. Instead of Steve being able to convince the Russians that he should be taken, Eddie convinced them he knew all they needed to know.

It was the exact type of falling on the sword Eddie would do.

Steve's eyes landed on Eddie, who was watching him silently, looking like he was doing his best not to cry.

"Eds? You okay?" Steve's voice cracked.

"Shit, are you?" Eddie asked back, letting out a disbelieving laugh.

"Yeah, sorry I woke you up."

"You're kidding, right?"

Eddie looked mad. He sounded mad.

"No, I'm really sorry. I know you don't sleep so great, either, so," Steve shrugged. "I wouldn't blame you if you wanna go down the hall to the girls' room."

Eddie blinked at him, silence making the air feel thick with an awkwardness they hadn't had between them in months.

And then Eddie's hands were cupping his face, almost lovingly.

"Do you ever think about how other people care about you?" Eddie asked, barely more than a whisper. "Or how seeing you suffer and then apologize for it breaks our hearts?"

Steve's mouth was opening and closing like a fish, searching Eddie's eyes for the answer he wanted.

"You have no idea how much people love you, do you?" Eddie's forehead rested against Steve's.

"I-"

"Stevie. I need you to listen to me." Eddie breathed out slowly. "I can't imagine how much you've seen. I know you've told me, and I've seen some of it myself, but half of the shit you've done? Just to keep everyone safe? And you keep seeing it in nightmares all the time. It never goes away. You're so strong. You get up every day and go to work, and cart the kids around, and bring me to appointments, and cook dinner for me and Wayne, and help Robin with her girl problems, and then you go to bed and have to worry about what monsters will be waiting for you. And then you wake up the next day and pretend it didn't happen, but we all know it did. I know it did."

Steve sniffled.

"And here I am, shaking in the corner of my bed because I think I hear a noise outside my window one time." They both let out a laugh, but Eddie continued before Steve could interrupt. "I was scared. I tried waking you up when you first started making noises. You sounded like you were hurt. And then you said Dustin's name and I could feel you shaking. And then-"

"And then I said your name."

Eddie nodded.

Steve placed his hands at Eddie's neck, almost mirroring Eddie.

"You died. But it was the Russians. You convinced them you knew something to distract them from me and the kids, but you didn't so they just kept...they-" He let out a sob as tears fell down his cheeks. "They did to you what they were gonna do to me."

"Oh, sweetheart."

Eddie's lips were on his.

It shouldn't be happening like this, a part of Steve thought.

It should be romantic and sweet, maybe after a date where Steve used all the charm he's been saving just for Eddie, maybe when the reason for the wetness against their cheeks was because of rain instead of tears.

But in a way, it was always going to be like this: admitting too much at the wrong time, saving each other from pain.

Regardless of all the ways it should be and all the ways he wished for it to be, it was perfect.

When Eddie pulled away, he let out a small laugh.

"Robin said this would happen as soon as I said I was staying in your room."

"She said I would have a nightmare that left us both crying and kissing in a bed that is definitely big enough for us to not be cuddling, but we definitely were?" Steve asked with a smirk. "She's good, but I don't think she's that good."

"Oh, shut up," Eddie lightly smacked his shoulder. "You know what I meant."

He did. She'd said the same to him.

"Well, maybe if you hold my hand, I'll be able to fall back asleep?" Steve suggested.

"Yeah, I could do that. Or..."

"Or?"

"Or I could..."

"You could?"

Eddie nipped his bottom lip.

"I could kiss you in...other places..."

"Eds, just say what you wanna do," Steve giggled.

"Fine! I could suck you off so you can sleep!" Eddie laughed.

"You could do that, yeah," Steve nodded, pretending that wasn't enough to rile him up.

"I could. If you want."

"Is it just to help me fall asleep?" Steve asked, suddenly nervous that this wasn't anything more than helping out a friend.

"If I wasn't completely clear before: I love you. I love you enough to sacrifice myself in your nightmares, I love you enough to do stupid physical therapy sessions that I hate because you get sad when I don't go, I love you enough to make Robin take a room with Nancy and Jonathan so I could stay right here with you, and I love you enough to suck your dick to help you sleep."

Steve snorted.

"Be my guest, then," he gestured down at his lap, watching Eddie literally lick his lips.

Just when Eddie was breathing against his stomach, ready to move further down, Steve stopped him.

"Wait!" Eddie looked up at him, eyes wide. "I love you, too. Need you to know that."

Fondness poured from Eddie as he pressed a kiss to Steve's stomach.

"I know, sweetheart."

[ibetonlosinghuskies]

patience and pleasure pt 6

summary: as paige packs to move to uconn, she starts to doubt herself. grasping for a sense of security, she goes to the one person she knows can make her feel better. azzi.

disclaimer: as always everything i write is fictional!

warnings: fluff, angst, emotional distress, mild anxiety mention.

word count: 4.6k +

author's note: ik this probably isn't what you were expecting lol, very sorry. i will be giving yall what you want very soon.

~flashback to july 2020~

paige's pov:

i can't believe i'm doing this.

playing at uconn has been my dream since i was a kid, but now that it's finally happening i feel paralyzed. packing my stuff made things feel final.

i'm really leaving minnesota. everything i know is here.

who's going to build legos with drew? who's going to make my parents coffee in the morning?

my hands shake as i fold another shirt, memories flooding my mind. friday night games, late-night drives with the team, sunday morning cartoons with drew.

what if i'm not ready? what if i can't handle the pressure?

i'd been doing a good job keeping all this to myself. putting on my best smile for every interview, every photoshoot. i had a good enough support system too, my family, friends, fans. but behind every "congratulation", i felt their expectation. a standard of perfection only a prodigy could fulfill.

what if i let everyone down?

i can't let them see me crack.

it's not like i'm not grateful for the opportunity. this is all i've worked towards for years. it just hurts to leave everything behind, especially for a future i had no control over. i felt safe here, in this moment, i'm full of potential.

the weight of my potential weighs heavily on my shoulders, keeping me up at night.

i sink to the floor, surrounded by half-packed boxes. part of me wants to unpack it all, to pretend that time isn't moving forward.

my eyes snap up when i hear a knock at my bedroom door.

"hey kiddo," my dad says warmly, leaning against the door frame.

"hey," i reply weakly, putting on a smile. i feel his eyes scan my face, his expression warming with sympathy.

he knows my smile is fake.

"already packing? you don't leave for another week, it shouldn't take you that l—" he stops mid-sentence looking at my closet. "but with that shoe collection maybe you should've started a month ago," he teases, trying to make me smile.

"i just want to be ready," i say, sounding more insecure than i expected.

"it's okay to be scared, you know?" he starts, his voice gentle. "i know this is a big change."

"i just don't wanna disappoint anyone," i stand, continuing to pack my stuff, eyes glued to the floor.

"you could never disappoint us," he assures me. "we're all so proud of you, no matter what."

a mix of gratitude and homesickness rushes over me. i crumble over his words, a few tears escaping my eyes. walking slowly, he grabs me in his arms. we stand there for a moment, the heaviness of change lingering in the air.

"you know," he says suddenly, "i think azzi's still in town at her grandparents. why don't you give her a call?"

he's right, i usually visit her around this time of year. the thought of azzi brings a small smile to my face. memories of our summers spent together fill my mind—trips to the fair, month long sleepovers, sleeping in her clothes.

"not everything has to change, paige," his voice knowing, eyes gauging my reaction.

if anyone could understand what i'm going through, i'd be her.

"yeah, i'll give her a call," i nod, trying to shake my heartache.

"good," he says, walking to my door. "don't forget to leave some of your shoes behind. we don't need the whole state of minnesota wondering why there's a shortage."

i roll my eyes, laughing. "i'll think about it."

he gives me one last warm smile before closing my door. i take a deep breath, reaching for my phone.

azzi's pov:

i'm sprawled across my bed, scrolling through my phone when it starts buzzing. paige's name lights up the screen, and i can't help but smile.

"hey p," i answer, my smile showing in my voice.

"hey az," she replies, and immediately i know something's off. her voice is quieter than usual, lacking its usual charm.

"you okay?" i ask, sitting up straighter.

there's a pause, i can almost feel her forcing a smile through the phone. "yeah, i'm good. just...packing."

packing. right. she's leaving soon.

i'm hit with a wave of anticipatory grief. i've been trying to avoid thinking about what it's gonna be like when she leaves. we'd fallen into such an easy routine. she's spent countless summers at my grandparent's house, becoming part of my family.

"how's that going?" i ask, trying to sound hopeful.

"it's...going," she laughs gently. "it's just a lot, you know?"

i do know. the spotlight she's received these past couple years has been intense, but paige made everything she did look effortless. her confidence carried off the court, giving her a new charisma.

she was so easy to love.

"yeah...it's a big change," my voice matching her quiet tone.

there's another pause, the soft hum of the phone. i listen for her breath, a sigh, some background noice. but nothing. i feel her worry through the phone.

"can i come over—"

"you should come ov—"

we say at the same time. "i'll pick you up tomorrow morning," i smile at the thought of finally getting to see her.

i hear her take a steadying breath, "okay," her voice sounding a bit lighter.

my mind starts to wander. what if i don't see her again for years after this? all this time, and i never thought i'd have to confront my feelings for her.

"hey, i'll call you later, okay?" i'm sad to end our call, but i didn't have time to waste.

"uh yeah," she says, sounding a bit disappointed. "talk to you later."

i hang up the phone, my mind racing, filled with all of her favorite things. that minnesota lynx jersey she loves, her favorite snacks, the lego sets she builds with drew.

i can't let her leave without knowing how much of me she's taking with her.

i start in my closet, sifting through my clothes. my fingers brush against the fabric of my favorite hoodie—the one paige always steals when she's here.

i pull the hoodie closer to my chest, hoping that, for a moment, i could capture the warmth of her hug. a mixture of my perfume and her shampoo. i swear no matter how many times i wash the damn thing, it always carries a piece of her. like the intricate stitching holding the fabric, our bond sewn into the core of who we are.

i run my fingers along the seams—strong, resilient, trustworthy. i guess some things are too deep to be washed away. maybe it'll remind her that no matter how far she goes, a part of us will always be intertwined.

she should have this. it's practically hers anyway.

next, i move to my bookshelf, scanning the titles. my eyes land on one of my favorite john green books, looking for alaska. every once in a while she'd ask me to read it to her so she could fall asleep. paige always claimed my books were boring, but sometimes i'd catch her leaning in, eyes wide and attentive, consumed in the story. maybe she'd finally get around to reading it herself.

lastly, i grab some scissors off my desk and head for my front porch. the old basketball hoop stands sentinel, a silent witness to countless hours of our shared passion. i run my fingers along the worn metal, remembering all the times we'd scrimmage until the streetlights flickered on. our laughter and trash talk echoing through the quiet neighborhood.

i tilt the hoop towards me cutting off a piece of the net. the frayed edges feel like memories slipping through my fingers.

she was my champion first.

before the world knew 'paige bueckers', i knew paige. the slight competitive spark she'd get in her eyes before every shot. her confident sway as she played, turning my front porch into an arena.

everyone is finally gonna see in her what i've known for years.

back in my room, i surveyed my collection. each item, a different memory. i reach under my bed, adding the final touch to my gift—an old lego set paige and i bought together a long time ago. i put off building it with her, claiming we should save it for a special night.

there is nothing more special than tomorrow night.

i want everything to be perfect. i find myself frantically cleaning the house at 2 am, as if paige hasn't visited countless times. i organize my bookshelf, fold clothes, anything to keep my hands busy and my mind from wandering to her.

my exhaustion finally takes over and i lay sprawled across my bed. i try to sleep but she's all i dream about.

except these aren't the usual dreams.

a sequence of different visions flash through my mind, in each of them i'm losing her. we're on a basketball court, but something's off. paige is wearing a uconn jersey, looking different in a way i can't quite place. older, more independent. i'm still in my high school uniform. we're on opposite sides of the court, the air between us heavy. i call out to her but no sound comes out.

i want to tell her something. but my throat tightens, restricting like it's trying to hold her too.

i wake up before the sun, in a cold sweat. it felt so real, almost predestined. a heavy ache in my chest lingers, still unable to articulate what i need to tell her. the thought of my nightmares becoming real ignites a motivation in me to figure it out. fast.

i close my eyes again, hoping for dreamless sleep this time.

tomorrow, i'll find the words. i'll make sure i do.

paige's pov:

the sun peaks through my blinds, waking me up earlier than usual. awaking to the sight of half-packed boxes leaves me disoriented. but my heart flutters when i check my phone to find seven unread text from azzi.

i'm gonna miss stuff like this the most.

glancing at the time, i start to pack a bag to stay the night. she technically didn't say i was sleeping over, but i know us well enough to know that i will.

i start throwing things into my bag—my favorite hoodie, some shorts, and a pillow. then i pause, remembering the last time we hung out at her grandparents' place.

everything i needed was already there.

i empty half the bag, smiling to myself. the hoodie she'd always let me wear, my toothbrush, that book azzi's always bugging me to read, even my favorite pillow. they're all still at her place.

i'm reaching for my phone to tell her i'm ready when i hear my doorbell. smoothing out my hair, i nearly trip down the stairs running to answer the door.

i take a quick breath. even after all this time, i still want to look good for her. the moment i open the front door i'm met with azzi's smile, carrying two coffees in her hands.

everything i need is right here.

"i'm surprised you're not still in your pajamas," she smiles, handing me a coffee.

"what? no, of course not. i've been up for hours," i lie, letting her roll her eyes at my comment.

"mhm," she turns walking to her car.

i glance at her while she walks, her attitude showing in her posture. within just a few seconds, i already feel lighter.

the drive there is both long and short. as we pull up to her grandparents' house, i feel a wave of nostalgia. how many summers have i spent here? how much of me will i be leaving behind?

azzi's grandma is already at the door as we get out of the car. "paigey!," she calls out, her voice warm and welcoming. "how's our little superstar?"

"hi grandma fudd," i mumble, as she pulls me into a hug. i feel like a kid again in her arms.

"look at you," she says, holding me at arm's length. "more beautiful every time i see you."

i blush bashfully at her compliments. "hey, what about me?" azzi pouts from behind us.

"oh hush, you too," she pulls azzi into a deep hug. "i'm glad you finally came, paige. i was worried you weren't gonna make it this year. azzi here hasn't stopped talking about you since your last visit."

i shoot azzi a look, raising my eyebrows at her. she blushes, looking away.

once inside, memories pass me by like a warm summer breeze. the creaky third step on the stairs, the faded marks on the doorframe where azzi and i measured our heights every summer. old family photos lining the hallway, many of which include me.

azzi leads me up to her room, her hand gently tugging at mine excitedly. i let her lead like it was my first time in this house.

as we enter her room, i can't help but notice how clean it looks. her bookshelf organized by size and color, desk clear and neat. i almost miss the messiness of it all, the way her personality leaked all over her bedroom walls.

had she cleaned everything for me?

i scan her bedroom walls, all of which are covered in photos of us. photos from practice, summer trips to the lake, championship games.

her bedroom a museum of us, a bold testament to our bond.

"you kept all of these?" i asked softly, touching the corner of a photo from years ago.

azzi shrugs, a slight blush coloring her cheeks. "of course," she clears her throat nervously. "only because i look so good in them," she laughs failing to hide her affection.

i turn to her, ready to tease her about being sentimental, but the words die on my lips. she's holding something behind her, smiling with her eyes.

she takes a deep breath, bringing her hands forward slowly. in them is a carefully wrapped package, similar to the half-packed boxes littering my floor at home.

"i, uh, got you this. well, more like...put together." she hands me the box.

my fingertips brush against hers, heart racing as i look up into her eyes. "az, you didn't have to—"

"just open it, p," she interrupts, her voice soft and eager.

i unwrap the box, finally catching sight of its contents. it feels like all of the air has been sucked out of the room, it's all too much for me. her favorite hoodie, a worn copy of looking for alaska, a piece of frayed net from the hoop on her porch. and...is that the lego set we bought a long time ago?

all pieces of us, delicately put together in a small brown box.

"az..." i whisper, blinking away tears.

"i wanted you to have a piece of home to take with you," she explains, her eyes seeking my reaction. "so you didn't forget me—us."

i look up at her, my vision blurring the edges around her face. a warmth in my heart builds, surrounded by fragments of us. the finality of it all finally hit me.

how can we pack all of us into a box? years spent together, inseparable for the longest time, just to be neatly packaged in a cardboard box.

there's still so much i want to take with me. how do you package the sound of azzi's laugh? the feeling of her hand in mine? how do i fold up the comfort of her presence and tuck it neatly into a suitcase?

our friendship is a living, breathing thing. packing it away feels inhumane. she will never be a cardboard box i push into the back of my closet, the back of my mind. azzi's warmth pulses underneath my skin. she's the movement that pushes the blood through my body.

i realize something now. home isn't minnesota. it isn't my house or even this one.

home is azzi. and i'm about to leave it behind.

the weight of this box, however light in pounds, pulls me to the floor. my knees buckling underneath me, unable to form a coherent sentence. i'm drowning in a sea of emotions, waves of nostalgia and fear crashing over me. i cry, clinging to the box, like a life vest. my breath comes in short gasps, like i'm barely keeping my head above water.

i hear her call my name, but i can't respond. her voice feels far, muffled by my own emotion. i want to reach out, to tell her i'm okay, but my body won't cooperate.

azzi's hoodie wraps around me like a buoy, keeping me from sinking into the depths of my fears. the book, a raft of memories. the piece of net becomes a rope, pulling me to the shore of home—to her.

i can feel her worry radiate off her in waves, matching the momentum of my fear.

azzi's my anchor, solid and hopeful, grounding me in this storm. her hands cup my face, holding me like water, wiping away the flood.

her touch is gentle, safe. i lean into it instinctively, she always knows how to bring me back to myself.

looking up, i meet azzi's gaze. her eyes are a mirror of my own—a mix of worry, empathy, and something deeper. something that's been left unspoken between the two of us for a long time.

i feel her eyes search my face, a warmth that cuts through the chill of my tears.

azzi's looking at me like i'm her anchor too like she's just as terrified of drifting apart.

"paige, look at me," she says softly, also crying, wiping away my tears before her own.

i force myself to focus on her face. the wetness of her eyelashes, the trembling of her breath, her flushed cheeks—anything to slow my thoughts.

she sits on her knees, catching my tears in her palms. "you're not losing me, okay?" her voice reassuring, but also breaking between her tears.

"okay," i mumble sniffling. before i can thank her or apologize, she pulls my forehead to her lips. they tremble softly against my skin, her sadness showing but insistent on soothing me first.

azzi pulls my head into her chest, stroking my hair gently. i wrap my arms around her waist firmly, thinking that maybe if i hold her tightly enough, i can keep her here—in this moment, forever.

my tears begin to settle as i focus on her heartbeat, trying to memorize it. each beat a resilient promise, a faint whisper of trust, something to hold on to.

we stay there for a moment before azzi pulls back, staring at me with such a tenderness it almost sets me off again.

my eyes fall on the lego set peeking out of the box, and i can't let but let out a shaky laugh. "you're finally letting me build this," i smile, "it only took me almost moving away, huh?"

azzi's face breaks into a small grin, relief showing in her eyes. "like i'd trust you to build it on your own. someone's gotta make sure you read the instructions."

"hey!" i gasp in mock offense. "instructions are for people who don't know what they're doing, i'm a professional lego architect."

"oh we'll see about that," she jabs, opening the box.

azzi's pov:

as we build the lego set together, i can't help but steal glances at paige. i read the instructions to her but she's definitely not listening. already working at the pieces, her focus is unbreakable. her tongue pokes out slightly as she concentrates. it's so quintessentially her, it makes my heart ache.

the day passes by in a blur of laughter and shared memories. it isn't until i notice how dark my room has gotten that i realize we've spent hours on my bedroom floor.

"see, i don't need instructions," paige says, proudly showing off the part she's assembled.

"yeah, whatever," i laugh, admiring her confidence.

we're interrupted by a soft knock at my door, the scent of fresh-baked cookies wafts from behind the door. i open the door to my grandma, always the perfect host, holding a plate of chocolate chip cookies.

she smiles warmly, "i thought you two might want a cookie break."

paige lunges up from the floor almost pushing me over, reaching for the plate. "you're gonna have to send some of these to connecticut," she says, between mouthfuls.

she laughs at her comment, "i wanted to give you this also," in her other hand she hands me an old film camera. "maybe you can capture something special," she smiles before closing the door.

"your grandma makes the best cookies," paige's voice muffled under the sound of her chewing.

before she can react, i snap a photo of her. the camera clicking in a way that makes me giggle.

"hey, i wasn't ready!" she snatches the camera out of my hands. "you're always the model anyways," she says, snapping a photo of me.

i give her a fake smile, still reaching for the camera. "happy now? give it back," i laugh, chasing her around my room.

"not until you give me a real smile," she holds the camera above her head.

"that's not gonna work, we're the same height, stupid," i reach for the camera nearly knocking it out of her hands.

"one picture, with a smile," she takes the camera up to her eye to look through the viewfinder.

i give her another impatient smile. she kneels down dramatically, shifting back and forth while snapping photos.

"okay, my turn," i reach for the camera again.

"these aren't real smiles," she pokes my side, making me giggle. "see there it is, hold still."

i drop my smile and pout dramatically. paige moves the camera away from her face and lunges towards me, jabbing at my sides. "stop, paige," i giggle, swatting at her hands.

she dodges me, her fingers continue relentlessly. i push her onto my bed, using my body weight to keep her still. we fight for a moment squirming around my mattress before i pin both of her wrists down. satisfied, i grin down at her. our laughter comes to a soft stop and we're both breathless.

"see, was that so hard?" paige tilts her head to the side, still out of breath. she attempts to reach her hands up again but i tighten my grip.

"oh, whatever," i roll my eyes, leaning closer to her, my hair draping over her face.

"can i tell you something?" she starts, her voice sounding a bit more serious.

"hm?" i respond, still satisfied i could hold her still.

paige hesitates for a moment, her eyes searching mine. "i've never actually had my first kiss," her cheeks flushing a light pink. "i thought i would've by now, before college, you know?"

i loosen my grip on her wrist, "oh, i had no idea. i figured plenty of guys would be lining up to kiss the paige bueckers," i tease.

"i guess," she looks away bashfully, "i just want it to be with someone special. someone i care about," her voice lowering to a whisper.

there's a silence that hangs between us. i feel my heart pounding in my chest. "like who?" i ask quietly.

i need to hear her say it.

her eyes flicker to my lips briefly before meeting my eyes again. "like...you," she says nervously, almost asking it like a question.

was she saying what i think she was?

"really?" i lean closer to her, my eyes wide and hopeful.

she lets out a nervous breath, her eyes intently locked on my lips. "yeah," she whispers, blinking quickly.

before i can overthink it, she leans in, closing the gap between us. her lips meet mine softly, and my hands reach for her face. i feel a nervous tremble in her lips, soft and warm. the pure flavor of her lips, tasting like vanilla and chocolate. her hands move to my waist, her thumb swaying slightly. we move slowly, gently, not wanting to rush this moment.

our kiss is tender like a warm summer night. her lips move sweetly and determined like she's thought of this before. her hands stroking softly saying "i've wanted this. wanted you."

when she pulls back i feel a new kind of emptiness. how am i going to live with the absence of her touch? she's opened a crack in my heart, long enough for the light to come in.

kissing paige was like sunlight embodied.

we stare at each other for a moment. caught in this new in-between.

what do you say after you kiss your best friend? how do you tell her it was your first kiss too?

"i'm glad it was you," she smiles, sitting up.

"yeah, me too," i murmur, my voice full of emotion. i lean to the side, still dazed from her touch.

"it's getting late, we should probably—" she starts.

"yeah...um," i respond uneasily, standing up to walk over to my closet. i grab one of my old t-shirts and a pair of shorts. "you can wear these to sleep in."

paige takes the clothes from me, her fingers brushing against mine. when we touch this time, it feels different, heavier. she heads to the bathroom to change, and i let out a breath i didn't know i was holding in.

even being just a room over, it feels like she's slipping through my fingers. i'm reminded of my nightmares from last night, paralyzed by the thought of losing her.

i need to tell her.

i grab a piece of paper and pen off my desk, my hands quivering slightly as i start to write.

the first part of the letter flows easily. but as i continue, i feel a shift. the truth hanging in the space between my pen and the paper.

she deserves the truth. and i owe it to myself, to finally tell her.

my heart races, searching for the right words as i continue...

i reread the letter, feeling vulnerable under my own words.

what if this ruins everything? what if she doesn't feel the same way?

i glance at my bedroom door, knowing paige could return at any moment. the panic sets in and i make a split-second decision. my hands shake as i tear the paper in half.

the first part, full of friendship and encouragement. it's a bit more sentimental than usual but not enough to make her suspect anything. i fold it neatly, placing it atop the other objects in the box. it's safe, expected.

the second part, my true feelings for her. i can't bring myself to throw it away, but i'm not ready for her to read it either. i tuck the small slip into the final pages of the last chapter of the book i'm giving her.

maybe one day i'll find the courage to tell her. maybe someday she'll finish the book and know how i really feel. but for now, this feels safe.

i don't know if i'm hoping she finds it or not.

as i hear the bathroom door open, i quickly close the book, sealing my fate. my heart pounds with the weight of my unspoken words.

my thoughts cease when i see her in my clothes. she tucks a strand of hair behind her ear, looking unabashedly herself. for a moment, i see our future. imagining our closets becoming one, holding her as she falls asleep, an endless sleepover.

how am i supposed to let her go?

she catches me staring and smiles softly, a knowing glint in her eyes that makes my heart ache. without speaking, we settle into our usual routine. i let her sleep on my favorite side of the bed, she shifts around, trying to get comfortable. eventually, she turns on her side, her back facing me.

right before i drift off to sleep, i hear her call out to me. "azzi," she whispers softly into the dark.

"hm?" i answer, struggling to keep my eyes open.

"can you hold me?"

her voice gentle and vulnerable, as if i could hold every piece of her together. "of course," i wrap my arms around her waist, pulling her in closer. she sinks into my touch, her breath slows.

she drifts to sleep quickly in my arms, our heartbeats syncing. the weight of our unspoken words between us, laying heavily on my chest, pushing me towards a deep sleep.

i dream of never having to let her go.

[phfenomena]

❝in that lavender haze❞ || tom blyth x f!reader

| request- hear me out! lavender haze with tom 🤭

| A/N- done and done. im hearing you out and im listening so hard. i’ve been high probably like hundreds of times but still cannot properly word it sorry 💔

| WARNINGS- marijuana consumption (mega slay), kissing, eating, wine, tiktok, tooth rotting fluff,

(divider by @benkeibear)

the feeling of your lungs being filled with smoke made you giddy, everything with sharp edges turning soft and fuzzy. coughing lightly at the larger hit you’d taken you passed the blunt to your left, to tom.

your eyes fixed on the way his lips wrapped around it and the way he closed his eyes at the sensation. your hopeless crush on your mutual friend with rachel had been developing for months, seeing him at every gathering and meet up.

he was fairly nice and polite, the true english way. you just wished he’d converse with you, more than small talk. you’re laying on your back on the floor and studying the swirling patterns on the ceiling. out of your peripheral vision you see tom lay down next to you.

staring at the ceiling with you, you don’t ever say too much. and you don’t really read into my melancholia.

“you don’t have much to say, do you?” you question into the air hoping that tom would cling on. he hums and says “yeah, i don’t know what you like or what you don’t like so i jus’ say nothing.” you turn your head to face him- all caution thrown to the wind. you find it hard to care about your words in your state. “when i first met you i thought you hated me, you wouldn’t talk to me like how you talked to everyone else. thought i might’ve done something. sometimes i still think that.” you confess and it hangs lowly over both of you.

“i was honestly kind of scared of you. in my head you’re this cool actress who does slashers and everyone loves her. i didn’t wanna say the wrong thing.” you smile and place your hand on your chest. “you think i’m cool? i think you’re cooler, tom.”

his eyes crinkle when he laughs and you love it. you find it hard to decipher where the high ends and where how tom makes you feel starts, but they’re mixing. “i think you’re really cool. you do these cool like artistic horror movies and i’m kind of obsessed with your acting.”

i find it dizzying, they’re bringing up my history. but you aren’t even listening.

the group on the couch and chairs above you pass a bottle of wine and finish off the blunt. your friend laughs loudly and you turn to look at him. “do you remember that time last year when you dated the like entire cast of that one movie? what’s it called? i can’t remember. that was funny as shit.” you cringe and cover your face trying to forget.

tom lightly grazes your shoulder with his finger and whispers “are you hungry? i really want pizza right now.” you smile and nod. he wasn’t going to ask about your questionable past times. he pulls his phone out of his pocket and hands it to you. “i can’t function enough to order pizza, could you do it?” you happily nod and scroll your way through the menu before you both agree on toppings you both like.

i just wanna stay in that lavender haze. talk your talk and go viral, i just need this love spiral.

the pair had found themselves in a corner, talking and giggling over pizza whilst telling stories. “yeah! and she kept asking when i was going to settle down and get married. during an interview for a horror movie.” tom shakes his head and laughs. “i couldn’t get through one promo or interview without someone showing me at-least one edit of me. it was torture.” you pull your phone out and show him how edits of him had filled your timeline.

“you’re literally everywhere. i’m not complaining but sometimes i want to see something else!” he picks his phone up and shows your his own home page. “i’m sorry i ruined your tiktok, but this might make up for it.” his entire for you page was filled with edits of you and you co-stars from your latest movie.

you laugh and watch them “i had no idea people made edits of me, i feel honored. it’s like a right of passage.” he sets his phone down as well as his pizza. “they only the use the same ten clips of you covered in blood, i need more content.” you place you own pizza down and lean towards him.

“do you wanna know a secret i’m not supposed to tell anyone?” he nods and leans closer. “i’m gonna in the next scream movie and i’m one of the ghostface’s, you’re gonna see me murdering on the big screen.” he raises his eyebrows and you barley take into account how close your faces are.

“i love everything you’re in. when i first met you, i went home and watched everything you’ve done.” he confesses with a smile and red eyes. “i did the exact same thing, rachel told me i was creepy! we’re like each others biggest fans.”

get it off your chest, get it off my desk. that lavender haze, i just wanna stay.

you’re sitting in the bathtub of your bathroom passing a blunt back and forth between you and tom. “it’s so much quieter in here, i love them but they’re so loud.” you say leaning your head back on the tile. he softly chuckles and looks at you. “i can’t believe we could’ve been hanging out for months, i should’ve just talked to you.” you smile and set the blunt in the ashtray you brought with you.

“yeah but where’s the fun in that? this is probably the best night i’ve had in a while.” you turn to look at him and you study his features. you’ve never had a chance to really look at him, your glossy eyes try to memorize each slope and curve of his face.

“can i kiss you?” you whisper out before even realizing you’ve said it. he mutters a small ‘yes’ and you’re leaning in, like your body’s on autopilot. he tastes like weed and pizza, you couldn’t find a bone in your body that cared. you sluggishly manage to inch onto his lap. “you’re so pretty.” he whispers in between kisses. his hands find purchase on your waist, not letting you even dream of getting off of him.

you reluctantly pull back and his lips chase yours. “do you wanna hang out tomorrow?” you ask him with a smile. “i would be honored, maybe i’ll take you out on a real date.” his hands are rubbing small circles on your waist. “the press is gonna love that one.” you mutter out before leaning back into him.

[nats-bottom]

NR - I Never Get Jealous

Summary: Natasha gets jealous over Reader dancing with other women.

Pairings: Natasha Romanoff x Reader

Warnings: Alcohol, jealousy

Notes: Sorry this took so long for me to write! I had some writer's block, but I'm back now!

I saw Fly Me to the Moon last night, and it is such a good movie! I highly recommend!

I also have accounts on Wattpad and AO3! The users there are @ paige_vers

Please give me requests! You can submit them here or on my insta, @ scarlettsoutset

ᨖᨖೱᨖ⧗ᨖⴵᨖ🕷️ᨖⴵᨖ⧗ᨖೱᨖᨖ

Natasha POV

I took another sip of my drink. Me and my girlfriend, y/n were at another one of Tony's parties. He threw parties all the time, most of the time for no reason. This party was no different. Just a party for no specific reason, with random people that none of us knew. 'Us' being the Avengers. We were all there because one, Tony made us all come, and two, there was no way we could sleep in the tower with all the loud music. 

I'm taken out of my thoughts when I feel a hand on my thigh and hear y/n say she's going to go dance. I give her a quick kiss and watch her as she walks off towards the dance floor. I move to the couch area, where a bunch of other Avengers are sitting. I sit down next to Steve, who's sitting next to Bucky. They each have a beer in hand, and are casually flirting with each other, but won't admit it. I start up a conversation with them, internally laughing every time one of them blushes at the other's comment. 

After a while, I get a glimpse of y/n on the dance floor, dancing with two other women, neither of whom I know. I feel the anger inside of me rising as I see y/n grinding on one of them. I watch her for a few minutes, when Steve waves his hand in front of my face. 

"Nat? Are you there Nat? Earth to Natasha!" he says trying to get my attention.

"What? Oh sorry. What's going on?" I ask.

"I just asked you how many pop tarts you think Thor will eat tonight. But clearly your mind is somewhere else. What's up?" 

"Oh, um, y/n is just dancing a little too much with some other women." I say as I feel the heat rising to my cheeks. 

"Ohhhh, I see. Someone's jealous." Bucky says with a smirk.

"No, I'm not jealous. I'm just, um, observing." I reply, not wanting to admit to my jealousy.

"Yes you definitely are. You should see your face." Steve says with a chuckle.

"Fine. I guess I am. And I'm going to go do something about it." I say as I get up and set down my drink on the table. I hear Bucky and Steve try to stop me, but I just ignore them and keep walking towards y/n. I squeeze through other people in the crowd and finally get to y/n. 

"Nat! Wanna da-" but before she can finish I pull her into me and give her a big kiss on the lips. She acts a little shocked at first, but then melts into the kiss. As I let go for air, she tries to hang on to the kiss a little longer. I keep my arms around her waist, hers around my neck. "What was that about?" She said with a smirk.

"I just didn't like how you were dancing with those other ladies." The other women had walked away by this point, leaving once they saw me glare at them. 

"Oh, is someone a little jealous?" y/n asks smugly, and drunkenly. 

"Jealous? Me? I never get jealous." I replied.

"Yeah. Sure. Uh-huh. I saw the look on your face as you came over here."

"I was not jealous. You can dance with whoever and I won't care." I say, trying to get her to believe me when I say that I'm not jealous.

"Then why'd you scare those other ladies off?"

"Because I want them to know that you're mine and mine only." I say in a deep voice. I pull her off the dance floor and to a couch in an area with the other Avengers. I sit down first and put her on my lap, putting my arms around her stomach. She rests her hands on mine and she leans back into my embrace. 

We talk with the other Avengers about random things, from Tony's newest project to how fast everyone thinks Pietro can run. I'm not really paying attention to the conversation though, all I can think of is y/n. How pretty she looks tonight, how she was dancing, and how I wished she danced with me like that. I move her hair aside, and start kissing her neck. She tilts her head to the other side a little after letting out a small, barely audible gasp. I start nibbling on her neck, making sure to leave a mark. I suck on the bite, then run my tongue over it. I move over to another spot, doing the same. I look over the marks I made, satisfied with it.

I move my hands to y/n's arms, rubbing them up and down. I whisper in her ear "you look so pretty, all marked up. Showing everyone else that you're all mine." I feel her squirm a little in my lap. "You like that don't you, pretty girl." I say, now playing with her hair. I nibble on her ear a little and I feel her shiver. "You just want everyone here to know that, don't you. You want everyone here to hear you scream my name." I hear her gasp, and see her nod ever so slightly. "Meet me in our room in 10 minutes." I whisper in her ear. She nods and excuses herself from the party, saying that she's tired and wants to go to bed. About five minutes later I excuse myself, explaining that I have an early day tomorrow. 

I leave the party and head to my room. I open the door to our shared room and see y/n there on the bed, clad in a matching lingerie set. I close the door behind me and walk up to her, smashing our lips together.

[torscrawls]

Batman’s no-kill policy is ectophobic

Summary:

“Well that just makes it sound like he thinks ghosts are worse than humans, you know? And! It got me thinking, Batman refuses to kill his enemies, right?” “Right,” Tim faintly agreed, desperately trying to make sense of this conversation. Phantom relentlessly continued, oblivious to Tim’s spiraling sanity. “Maybe that’s because he thinks that ghosts are less than humans! He doesn’t want to create more of us.”

Phantom is upset that Batman refuses to kill his enemies. Tim just wants his shift to start so he can get out of this conversation.

Words: 1 245

You can read the whole thing on AO3.

-

Tim was sitting in the break room of the Watchtower, mindlessly flipping channels on the big wall-mounted TV while trying to wake up for his next shift. Out of the corner of his eye he watched Phantom slowly drift in front of the big windows, face almost pressed against the glass and his whole attention fixed on the stars outside.

This in and of itself wasn’t anything uncommon; Phantom seemed to have an almost obsessive fascination with space, but what had caught Tim’s attention was the frown on the ghost’s face. Normally he would have a dreamy expression if not a big smile on his face as he watched the expanse outside the windows, but not today. And Tim was willing to admit that it was getting to him.

After another few minutes of switching between channels, silence, and no change in the frowning Tim pressed the off button on the remote and heaved a sigh as he turned to face the window and the floating ghost. “What’s wrong?”

Phantom startled as if he had forgotten he wasn’t alone in the room, or as if he had forgotten he could be seen by others. He had a bad habit of forgetting to turn himself visible and scaring the shit out of people around the tower. He looked over his shoulder and fixed Tim with a wide eyed, literally shining, look of confusion. “What do you mean wrong?”

Tim made a vague gesture at the ghost. “You’ve been frowning ever since I got here. Did something happen?”

Phantom turned around in the air, spinning on his own axis until he was looking at Tim upside down. Tim noted that his hair stayed in the same position throughout. He wasn’t jealous, not at all.

“Well, I was just thinking... Does Batman hate ghosts?”

Tim blinked, thrown by the direction the conversation had taken. “What? No?”

The frown on Phantom’s face deepened as he righted himself in the air. “But he just told me that he ‘was sorry for my loss’, as if something bad had happened? And when I asked him what he meant he said he regretted not being able to save me.”

Tim paused, weighting his words carefully before slowly saying, “I’m sure he just meant that he was sorry that you had… You know…” Tim trailed off, winced, and then forced out, “Died.”

It was always a hard subject to breach, nobody liked to think about death. The Justice League and the Batfamily had all come to the unanimous decision to avoid the subject around their newest member since they were convinced that he would react badly to the topic.

Phantom snorted. “Yeah I know. Kinda hard to miss.”

“I didn’t mean—”  

But Phantom cut him off, “Wait. Is that why none of you talk about death around me? You’re scared that I’m gonna be, what? Offended?”

“Well… No?” Tim said unconvincingly.

Phantom laughed. “Oh my Ancients! You did! That’s so cute!”

“You know, we don’t really talk about death with each other either,” Tim said, feeling like he had to defend himself somehow.

Phantom tilted his head, still smiling. “Why?”

Tim blinked, thrown by the question. “Because… People don’t like to think about that?”

Phantom pursed his lips in thought. “See, that’s what I meant! Isn’t that just kinda rude? I mean, I’m dead, does that mean you guys don’t wanna think about me?”

“No?” Now it was Tim’s turn to frown. “That’s different.”

“Hmm,” Phantom hummed, looking unconvinced.

Tim scrambled for a change in subject and latched onto the first thing that came to mind. “So why would you think that Bruce hated you just because he said he was sorry for your loss?”

“Well that just makes it sound like he thinks ghosts are worse than humans, you know? And! It got me thinking, Batman refuses to kill his enemies, right?”

“Right,” Tim faintly agreed, desperately trying to make sense of this conversation.

Phantom relentlessly continued, oblivious to Tim’s spiraling sanity. “Maybe that’s because he thinks that ghosts are less than humans! He doesn’t want to create more of us.”

Tim had to step in at that, feeling like they weren’t on the same page when it came to some very important fundamentals. “Phantom, you—you understand that people don’t like dying, right? It’s the end.”

Phantom tilted his head with a look of confusion. “It’s not though?”

And Tim guessed that was true. He couldn’t really argue the point with a literal ghost, now could he?

“The town I come from, people don’t really care. Death, life, it’s kinda all the same,” Phantom said happily, as if that wasn’t a very troubling statement to make. And with no respect for Tim’s quickly dwindling sanity, he continued with a thoughtful finger tapping at his lower lip, “Except that death has a lot more flying in it. And energy beams.”

Tim made a mental note to try and find out exactly what town Phantom was talking about. Hopefully it wasn’t one on Earth. He managed a resigned, “Of course,” and hoped that was the end of the conversation. He needed to have enough energy left for his whole shift after all.

But Phantom just nodded and continued on, “Batman refusing to kill his enemies is all just an obvious ploy not to have them move on as ghosts!”

“Obviously,” Tim faintly agreed.

“That’s messed up! He just wants to trap them in the human realm with him so he can torment them forever!” Phantom shook his head. “I know a couple of people in the Zone who would love to exchange torture ideas with him. I thought that Fright Knight was scary and now I’m working with a guy like that, can you believe it?”

Tim couldn’t. “I—I don’t think that’s what he means by that.”

Phantom huffed in annoyance and crossed his arms. “It’s blatant ectophobia, is what it is!”

Tim opened his mouth to try and come up with an argument when the subject of their argument stepped into the break room. Bruce addressed him with clear disapproval in his voice, “Red Robin, you’re late for your shift.”

Tim had never been so grateful to receive Bruce’s disappointment. At least he wasn’t alone in this shitshow of a conversation anymore. “I’m sorry. Me and Phantom was just having a conversation about how you’re clearly discriminatory towards ghosts.”

Bruce stopped from where he had turned to leave. “…What?”

Phantom nodded. “Yeah! Don’t think I’ve forgotten your rude comment earlier about your condolences!”

Despite the bizarre situation, Tim almost laughed at the shocked expression on Bruce’s face, visible even under the mask. His father opened his mouth, closed it, and tried again, “I was just saying that I wish I could have helped you before you ended up as a ghost.”

“And I’m saying that that’s clearly showing a preference for living people!”

Bruce pressed his mouth into a thin line before saying, “I think we need to have a conversation about the value of life if you’re going to be joining us on any more rescue missions.”

“See!” Phantom looked at Tim as he gestured angrily at Bruce “There he goes again!”

Tim got up from the sofa. “I’m late for my shift.” And he left the break room as if the ghosts of hell were at his heals. Which they kind of were; Phantom’s angry voice following him down the corridor. He really wasn’t awake enough for this shit.

[mayasaurusss]

Hi hi!! Love ur writing :3 could we maybe get something about seeing a horror movie with Shauna? Reader is a huge horror fan and Shauna thinks the movie sounds kinda corny but still wants to see something with them?

Day nineteen: watching a scary movie.

Hello anon! It so happened that you requested this just as I was about to start fictober, so I've decided to include your request in! Sorry for the delay. This might be slightly bad because unfortunatley I only slept two hours tonight and I can't even form coherent thoughts.

Shauna sits on your couch, looking at you pulling out your DVD stash.

"I hope you picked a good movie, not one of those corny ones" she says, judging your movie choice.

You had invited your lovely girlfriend, Shauna, to have a movie marathon with you. Now, you knew she wasn't a horror movie fan so you thought she was going to give you a half ass apology, but instead she agreed.

"What movie did you pick?" she looks over your shoulders to see an old dvd copy of 'Scream'. You hear her sigh behind you, and turn to see her slouching back into the couch. "What?! It's a classic, we've gotta see it!".

Shauna can already feel a vein popping in her head. She simply doesn't like horror movies, of any kind, especially those old 80's to 90's movies. Friday the Thirteenth, Nightmare on Elm Street, Scream and many others really aren't the kind of movies she'd watch for fun, unlike you. She much prefers drama and romance.

"I know it's a classic, I'm just not so sure I'll like it" the couch cushion dips under your weight as you sit next to Shauna. "You will, I promise".

“Can’t we like, watch creepy children’s movies? Like Coraline or Monster’s House?” you slowly turn your head at her, giving her a judgmental look. “Kids movies? I mean…yeah maybe we could, but I wanna see this first” you wave the empty case in the air, emphasizing it. “Alright…”

As the movie goes on, Shauna feels more creeped out than she'd like to admit. She moves closer to you, leaning on your body for comfort.

"Oh don't tell me, are you getting scared?" you tease her, feeling how she slightly trembles against you. "No I'm not, I just want to figure out who it is". You scoff at her, "Yeah baby, sure".

During the film, you keep making trivia references about the making of the movie and it's lore, making it harder for Shauna to even enjoy the movie. "You know here in this scene, it's one of the few times where Ghostface is played by an actor and not a stuntman!" and "The party scene was shot over twenty one days!" and "Ghostface's costume was supposed to be white!" and so on.

Her body betrays her when ghostface appears behind Sidney, ready to slice her throat. As the masked killer suddenly appears, Shauna lets out a scream of pure terror and clings for dear life to you.

"Shauna!" she buries herself in your arms, steering her eyes away from the tv. "Hey! It's done, it's done" she emerges from the blankets like a scared puppy, looking between you and the tv. "Is it over?" you let out a relieved sigh, looking to see if she's alright. "Yeah; yeah I paused it".

The monitor illuminates the dark living room, giving it a disturbing look of suspension in time. "...Sorry" she lets go of your body, sitting up straight and away from you, as if staying any second longer may not let her breathe.

"And for what? I am sorry, I forced you to watch something you didn't feel comfortable in" you may have gone overboard, but in truth, you just wanted to slightly tease her. You certainly didn't expect this reaction out of her.

"I am sorry, truly" you tell her, watching how the fear leaves her eyes to be replaced with relief. "But I wanted to. I wanted to watch it with you" she pauses for a second, "You're my... I like you, and I wanted to spend time with you".

A deep feeling of adoration fills your heart and you take her in your arms and hug her tight against you. "Aww, you're so cute!". Shauna is blushing deeply, but she secretly loves all this attention and sweet words you're giving her.

You remain tangled with each other for a moment, until you feel her shift and look up at you. "So...can we watch The Addams Family instead?".

[indecenthoney]

Take a Joke

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You can find my other stories here!

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“And for the 5th time… I have things to do… The outside seems nice and all… but I just need to get these things done… The deadline is coming up and if I don’t finish… They’ll be on my ass for not finishing my part…”

“But you promised…”

“I know… I know… But I won’t be able to enjoy myself… If I’m stressing out this much… Listen… You can hang out all you want in my house… but I’ll be by my desk doing my work… Alright? And when I’m done we can do something together… Okay?”

“Fine… God you’re such a workaholic… Hehehe… You know… if you’re so stressed out… I could always… give you some head… You know? Release some tension… Just pop it into my mouth a little and you’ll be melting… Please daddy please~” 

“I- Y-you… Shut the fuck up… I don’t need head… What I need is to get this done…”

“Mm… You sure? Kinda stuttered there for a bit… You don’t wanna slap it on my tongue? Not even a little?”

“Again… Shut up… Go make yourself comfy and wait for me…”

“Fineeeee… You’re no fun!”

With every brooding individual, there stands a person who exudes sunlight and happiness. After all, opposites attract do they not? Well, my friend is a bit more open when it comes to physical contact. Or flirting for that matter. Not that they mean any of it. We’re just two friends that happen to hang out a lot. And with that comfortability, they simply love getting a rise out of me. You have to understand. It just kind of throws you off when you’re constantly asked to cum in their mouth. Like the image wouldn’t plague your mind. And now I’m just sitting here at my desk thinking about how badly I want to feel their lips around my cock. The unruly pressure in my pants obstructing my thoughts. Can you see what I’m going through? I couldn’t help but watch them from the corner of my eye. Laid flat on the bed, messing around with their phone. Her skirt slowly riding up her pretty legs-

“You knowwwww… You’ve been sitting there for a while, bud… Hahah… We’re never going to hang out if you keep staring at me like that… You sure you don’t wanna fuck me and get it over with? C’mon, just the tip? Pretty please? Push the panties to the side and rail me into the mattress… Hahahaaha… The look on your face… You wanna fuck me so bad… It makes you look stupid…” 

This little cock tease has been going at it since forever.  I am the sole victim of her little jokes. I know we’re friends and she’s comfortable with me. But I’m just a man. I can only take so many “invites” until I do something about it. It’s a joke. I know it’s a joke. But I think it’s about time I gave her a taste of her own medicine. You know? Scare her a little. What if the poor thing ran into someone who wasn’t so reserved? 

“Yeah? And? You keep offering… Honestly… I’m starting to think you actually want me to touch you… It’s pretty pathetic… If you wanted me so badly… You coulda been honest…” 

“W-what? No-... I-... U-uhm… I was just… Hahaha… Uhhh… Y-you’re really close… Could you- H-hey… Y-your hands are cold… What’re you… F-fuck… N-not my… Mmmph…” 

Taking my place up beside her, I pulled her over my lap raising her ass into the air. My hands gently caressing the fine shape of it all. Her legs kicking and flailing in protest. In response, my thumb pressing down deep into her causing her to wince at the pain. Physically teaching her that any sort of rebellion would be met with consequence. Soon settling down, allowing me to do whatever I please.

“O-ow… That hurts…”

“Then stop moving around so much… Why are you so surprised? You were talking a lot of shit earlier… Don’t tell me you're backing out now? What? All bark? No bite? I was getting really sick of your little jokes… Now look at you… Hahahha”

“S-stop… I-it’s not funny… Get your hand out of my… Aaa- I-I’m serious… You can’t rub me t-there… Fu- Mmph…”

“I can’t? Hahaha… What’re you talking about? Yes, I can… Watch me… Fuck… God you’re wet… For what? Damnnnnn… Someone needed this…  If you were just honest… I would’ve helped you out, you know? What’s wrong? Don’t you wanna feel good? Wasn’t this your plan? To get me all riled up… I think it’d be rude to stop when you’re enjoying it this much… C’mon…  Just the tip… Lemme slide my fingers in… Pretty please? With a cherry on top?”

Holding her ass down, I firmly pressed my thumb along her leaky slit, tracing downward onto her. Jolts of pleasure surface as her back arches against my fingers. Subtle moans aim to resound, yet her face burrowed deep into my pillow. I watch as she bites down, preventing any more from escaping. A futile attempt as the tension in her jaw is reduced to a gaping, slobbering mess. The pillow now soaked in her saliva. With her panties pushed to the side, my fingers tease the opening causing her to drip even further. Leading me to believe that she needed more than just a slight rubbing. Slowly, I slithered my way into her. Wriggling about in the tight heat. The constant throb of her cunt, pulsing, as she wrapped around my finger. As if the embarrassment wasn’t enough, her juices gradually coated my hand and down my arm. The sweet, sweet sight of weakness. Turning the tables on her little game. I wanted to see more. I wanted to bully her. More. Pulling back from the slick wetness of her pussy. I navigated myself around more uncharted waters. Gently I ran my hand around the opening of her ass. Inching myself into her-

“I said stop it! I hate you!”

“O-ow… Fuck… Dude? H-hey… Wait… I- I’m sorry… I was just… playing around… I thought I was playing around… Shit…”

After my sudden gesture, she slapped me across the face, quickly storming out of the room. Her face flushed with anger as if shades of red were splattered across a canvas. I was surprised to see this side of her. The jovial little entity now seething with rage. A joke that went too far. And chasing her down would only aggravate the situation. I thought that leaving her be for a few hours would be the best choice, so that I may get on with my work. However, working at my desk wasn’t all that productive as she lingered in my mind. Just as I mentioned before, there was no point in enjoying myself if I was so stressed. Yet, the opposite could also be said. I couldn’t quite get anything done knowing my friend wasn’t feeling her best. I felt horrible. So I rung her up, but that proved to be no help seeing as she left her phone on my bed. With no way of contacting her, I rushed out attempting to catch up. Before even reaching the steps, I heard a faint voice echoing from one of the spare rooms. Peeking into it, I found her quietly pleasuring herself. The frustration in her voice as she rubbed. Eager fingers that tried so desperately to alleviate the ache between her legs. I was to blame for the erratic motion of circles to the sensually slow piercing of parting flesh. There she sat flooding, barely keeping herself together. A slave to her own desire. Entranced by her fervor, I made the greedy mistake of getting a better look. Nudging the door in the process. The silence of the situation made it as if the door was screeching open like a banshee. There I stood awkwardly. 

“H-huh? What the fuck! Dude! Were you watching this entire time?!? Y-you’re sick!”

“N-no… Okay… Maybe… a little bit… But before you go off… I was just worried… How was I supposed to know where you ran off to? You left your phone on the bed so I kinda rushed out to find you… And is it really my fault you left the door open while doing this? I mean… how else was I supposed to get your attention? Knock?” 

“Yes!”

“Oh… My bad… Hahaha… Either way, it woulda been awkward… But now that I have your attention! I just… I’m… sorry… I-I guess I took the joke too far and… did something I shouldn’t have…”

“You guess? Well then… I guess… you just have a bad taste in jokes…” 

“Huh?!? Excuse me? Listen here brat! You’re no better! Says the person that CONSTANTLY throws themselves at me… You say I have a bad taste in jokes… But do you even hear yourself sometimes? I was joking earlier about you wanting something like this to happen… But you need this, don’t you? That’s it, isn’t it? That’s why you're touching yourself in this quiet little room… Waiting to get caught…”

“No-”

“Oh? You know what… lift your skirt… You didn’t get to finish, right? What kind of host would I be if I left you here hopelessly fucking yourself?”

“W-wuh? I-I… I don’t wanna…”

“Lift… your… skirt… And I’m not going to say this again… You can either listen to me… or you can sit there and take it… Even if you beg and cry and cum your brains out… I simply will not… fucking… care… Now spread them…” 

A hint of hesitance, yet fear taking over. Curiosity pushing the boundaries, but pleasure numbing the senses. The idle gaze that longed for release, anticipated a brief moment, only to feel eternity. The look on her face gave it all away. She sat there waiting and waiting. Her patience wearing thin to the point her hips buck against my fingertips. In my sadistic nature, I retreat elongating this personal hell. Our faces now close in proximity, witnessing every whimper and whine that pleads for my touch. Tugging at my shirt, urging me not to wait a second longer. The greedy little brat that believes she deserves such solace. However, who am I to deprive her of such desire? Humbling hands that ran quick from tip to knuckle. Leaving but pools of proof. 

“You poor thing… Hahaha… And here you said you didn’t need this…”

“Mmmph- Y-you didn’t g-give me much of a ch-choice…”

“Right right… But does that really explain how much you’re leaking right now? Gripping at my shirt for dear life… Hahaha… How cute…”

“F-fuck you…”

“Ahahahahah… Wow… You know… you should reallyyyyy watch your fucking mouth… Especially when someone’s knuckle deep inside you… They might get angry, you know?” 

“Mmpph… S-stop… I-it hurts… F-fuck… Please please please… I-I’m s-sorry… I’m s-sorry… You’re being t-too rough… I’m going to c-cum… if you keep… Aaa-... d-doing that…” 

“Oh hun… I think you got me confused with someone that actually gives a fuck…”

“I h-hate y-you… Aaa-”

“Woah there… Let’s not say anything we don’t mean… You LOVE me! You wouldn’t be looking at me like that if you hated me so much… You wanna be mad but your eyes keep rolling back… Hahahah… Subby puppy… Hm… I’m sensing a lotta tension… Oh! I know what’ll make you feel better! Why don’t you tell me one of your little jokes? C’mon… Aren’t you going to ask me to stick it in? Hm? Put a baby in you or something? No? Hahahha… Jeez… Put up a fight, bestie… A couple of fingers in and suddenly your attitude’s gone… No wonder why you’re so quiet…”

“C-cumm-ing… Mmphh…”

“Awww…. Already? Couple minutes in… That’s kinda embarrassing… Poor baby… Yeah? Yeah? Is someone gonna cum? Mmmm… That’s it, sweetie… There’s no need to be shy… Buck those pretty little hips all you want… Just fucking cum already… Let go… Cum for bestie… Hahaha… Ohhh fuckkkk… Goood girl…”

“Aaa- F-fuck fuck fuck…”

“Shit… Hahahah.. I didn’t take you for a squirter… Well, aren’t you full of surprises… I guess you could say we didn’t see that “cumming”... Hahahah… Get it? Ugh… You’re no fun… Hey hey… Don’t go limp on me now… I’m not done with you… ”

“Mmmm… N-no more… P-please… I-I c-can’t… T-too s-sensitive…”

“You can’t be serious… All this teasing… Just for one teeny tiny orgasm… You’re funny! No no no… I’m here to make sure you get your fill… You said it yourself… You’ve been dying to hang out with me, no? Now you’re pushing me away… C’mon, bestie… What’s one more orgasm? Hm?” 

“W-wait wait… Haha… U-uh… Right right… y-you’re work… work… y-you need to g-get it done… I-I really shouldn’t keep you from your work…”

“Fuckkkk, you’re right… How could I forget? You’re so smart, hun… What would I do without you? However, that would be a problem if they didn’t already extend the deadline… Management has a way of setting impossible dates and extending them right after… Always trying to keep us on our toes… Make us work harder… But those idiots never learn… Though I guess we can thank them… A longer deadline means more time… And more time means you have my FULL attention…”

“N-no-”

“Yes! Now that you’ve run out of excuses… Why don’t you be a good girl and sit on my lap? Yeah? Or do you want to fight about it?”

Docile. No words or fits of protest. Just timid hands that reached across shaky hips. Freeing herself from her skirt. With hips, laid bare, she found herself atop me, pressing against my member. Her teary eyes solely fixed on my lap; resisting the unsavory urge to twitch and grind. Nerves shocked to a standstill. Yet softness clears way from worry. My hands brush along her cheek, tracing down her collarbone, and finally feeling up the suppleness of her chest. In turn, her breaths begin to calm and her heart settled. And with this, back into motion as I cradle her hips. Back and forth. Forward and back. Slowly getting used to the hypnotic rut. Her palms placed evenly among my frame giving her the balance to move from her languid state to a more feverish need. The growing confidence to get off on her own terms. The audacity after all her reluctance. My thumb now applying pressure, rubbing gentle circles to remind her of her place. Truly the calm before the storm. Her movements stutter and jerk at an unrelenting tempo causing her to finish quickly, once again in an unsightly manner. The incoherent pleas that begged for mercy overshadowed by the gentle coo of my voice cheering her on. The brainless mess that filled my lap, losing composure with each release. Watching every single orgasm come to pass. Forced to sit and repeatedly cum for my sick enjoyment.

“Oooh fuck… Look at you all blissed out… Did we finally get it out of our system? Hm? Do we need another? No? You sure? Alright... Finally got what you wanted… Yeah? Hahahah… What do we say when the nice man makes you cum?”

“T-th-ank you… S-sir….”

“Well, aren’t you fucking perfect? That’s a good girl… Mhm… It’s okay… You can relax now… I got you… Hush hush… No more… I promise… You’re all cummed out… Such a good job, hun…”

--------------------------------------------

Yours truly,

GM

[luveline]

Jade, after the last zombie blurb I can’t stop thinking about like, r taking care of Steve’s knee. Poor boy does so much for everyone else and probably doesn’t think to take care of himself so r just wraps it for him or something. Feel free to use this as a prompt if you’d like, no pressure!!

thank you for the prompt beautiful, I thought it was a great idea!! steve zombie au — you wrap up Steve's injured knee and get ready to move out of your makeshift camp. tw for zombie apocalypse typical violence and gore

There's a misery in the air thick as coal dust. For five days now, you, Steve, and the rest of the survivors from The College have been holed up in an apartment building within the city that surrounds The Michigan–Indiana border. At first, you'd been scared that the raiders who ruined your community would follow the tracks and find you, but a handful of scouts doubled back to find the ruins of your community completely empty. Wrecked, but uninhabited. 

With no one to hide from, a new problem emerges. How are you going to feed this many mouths, support so many children who can't fend for themselves? 

You have to get back on the road. 

So people are packing up. You, amongst the injured, can only sit and watch, though your cuts and bruises get better everyday and this is more of a Steve-mandated bed rest than a necessary sit down. Meanwhile, Steve limps around on his hurting knee and pretends it doesn't hurt at all. You can see him across the room from you now, helping a young girl tie her borrowed shoes tightly. You'll be walking as far as you can tonight, which with little ones won't be very far, but to them will seem like miles and miles and miles. 

"How's that? Not too tight?" he asks, tying her laces.

"It's okay." 

"You need them nice and snug so you don't get blisters, I know it's not comfortable. You're being really brave, Debbie." 

"Is my dad coming home soon?" 

You're terrified for a moment that her dad is one of the people who didn't make it here with you, but luckily Steve must know who she means, and he says, "Any minute now, the river's not far. Do you want to come and sit with me and my girlfriend?" 

She nods to her left, where a book rests face down. "I'm okay. Thank you." 

"You're welcome. We're just over there if you change your mind, okay?" 

He points at you. Debbie and Steve notice you watching them, and you give them a friendly smile and wave. You know you don't look especially inviting. You have marks all over your arms, more on your legs though they're hidden by your pants, and your hair hasn't been taken care of in a week. Your wave falters, even as Steve waves back. 

You pull on the jacket you've been given and pull the hood over your hair before Steve gets back to you.

Steve sits down next to you and sighs.

"Ready to go?" he asks. 

"Yeah." It's not as if you have any possessions to pack. "Are you?" 

"For sure," he says, dropping his face into his hands. "No, god… I'm tired, I don't wanna walk. I wish we could stay here." 

"I know, I'm sorry." 

He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand and straightens up. You haven't had a whole lot to talk about with one another lately, but luckily love doesn't need a lot. Your hands meet like magnets and your fingers thread together, his palm rough as yours but pleasantly warm. 

You sit like that for a while. 

"Here, the boon you requested," Robin announces, dropping a little white parcel into your lap. "Did you guys need socks? Sarah said she'd swap me four whole pairs for one of my hoodies." 

Robin being willing to swap one of her hoodies for socks makes you wanna cry. You smile at her. 

"We don't need any socks. You need to stop trading your things away," Steve says. 

"I know you'll find me another one." She looks between you both and bites her lip, hands moving up to her hair. She scratches through it. "Maybe we could stay here tonight, catch up with everyone else tomorrow," she suggests, eyeing you both thoughtfully.

"No," Steve says, kind but firm. "We're ready to go." 

"Okay. Well, I'm gonna go see if Chloe needs a hand with baby Ada," Robin says. She makes a heart with her hand and pushes it down at you. You make one back. 

"She doesn't even like babies," Steve says as she leaves. 

"She's amazing. Okay, take your pants off handsome." 

Steve blinks at you. "Excuse me?" 

You hold the bandage Robin brought you between your index and middle finger. "Time to wrap you up." 

"I'm not cut." 

"I know, but we're gonna be walking, and your knee still hurts. The compression will help." 

Steve knows you're right, even if he isn't eager to be looked after. You shake the blanket over his lap and he slides out of his pants, baring his purpled knee to you unhappily. 

"The bruise is worse," you murmur, unwrapping the bandage from itself in looser circles around your hand. "But it doesn't look swollen anymore. How does it feel?" 

"I was shit scared it was fucked forever, but it was just sprained. It's definitely getting better," he confesses. 

"And if it was fucked?" you ask. He told you it didn't even hurt. "Were you going to pretend forever?" 

"As long as a I could." 

You rub your thumb over his kneecap and wince at his wincing. "Lame… This is gonna hurt, I'm sorry, but not for long." 

"How d'you know it won't make it worse?"

"According to Sarah's copy of Field Medicine for Injury and Disease, it won't. I'm gonna start on top so it doesn't chafe while we walk, and I'm going to pull it really tight, so tell me if it doesn't feel right." 

"Can I ask you something?" Steve says severely. "Who the fuck is Sarah?" 

You wrap his knee. One round of white bandages at a time with a continued pressure, your fingers as gentle as they can be over the stain of his contusion. He doesn't make a sound the whole time, though you know it aches. 

"Did Robin give you her last quarter?" you ask. 

"What, the oxycontin? No, I think she gave it to Jonathan. His burn is scabbing over."

"Then you have nerves of steel." You want to call him my love, or my boy, but you're not often like that, and not in front of so many people. While nobody's watching, you lean down and kiss his knee. You're embarrassed as soon as you've done it but you can't take it back; you sit up and finish tucking in the end. 

Steve takes your face into his hand unexpectedly. 

He might call you honey, or baby, but he's quiet. You miss him so much and he's right here —you don't need The College if he's with you, but you'll miss your bedroom, because there he'd talk for hours about whatever he wanted. You'd give anything to be back there even for a second listening to him re-explain the plot of Fast Times, or try to convince you that cheese didn't even taste that good anyways so don't bother missing it. 

But you're here, and he's gonna be fine. One day he's gonna feel like chatting his nonsense again and you'll be there to listen. Until then, you'll do your best to take care of him.

"Thanks," he says, rubbing your cheek with his thumb. 

He looks so pretty. Brown eyes, the lingering purple and yellow of the shiner he suffered nearly invisible under the dark shadows beneath them. His hair is limp and a tiny bit longer than he prefers to have it, kissing his neck on both sides. He doesn't look clean, and it doesn't matter. 

"You're welcome. Now put your pants back on, Steve. We have places to be soon." 

He squeezes your cheek. "I don't think I can stand up." 

You help him back into his pants, the both of you laughing, and shuffle on your butt so you can sit hip to hip with him, your arm curled behind the small of his back. 

"Put your head on my shoulder, please," you say. 

Steve complies. 

You smile to yourself when he starts to talk quietly, "Hey, did I ever tell you about the time I went to Switzerland? Skiing?" 

"No," you murmur back. "What happened?" 

"I fell on my face. So, I was seventeen, and my mom…" 

—

if you’re reading this, thank you so much! I know some of you are dedicated readers of the zombie au and it warms my heart completely, it makes writing for them so so rewarding and I couldn’t be more grateful <3 if you have any requests for them let me know if you’d like to! but thank you again either way!

[beautysamour]

hihi!!! hope your doing well :) i was wondering if you could pls write a kenji ff of like an enemies to lovers kinda thing where the reader is always angry at kenji but slowly starts to loosen up ig. i hope that makes sense!! you can change it up ofcc ^^

Shameless

✧ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: kenji kishimoto x reader

✧ 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬: kenji kishimoto, mentioned juliette ferrars

✧ 𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: hatred and love are truly two sides of the same coin.

✧ 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: reader slowly falling for kenji

✧ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 4.2k

✧ 𝐚/𝐧: set during the second/third-ish book. hope you’re doing well too ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝

Kenji has this gift, ability, to turn invisible. It’s quite beneficial during missions and for most things really, like sneaking out late at night when everyone is supposed to be asleep or suddenly disappearing when someone you didn’t like was looking for you, or even better, scaring someone.

“You fucking asshole!”

You stared at Kenji in disgust as he feigned ignorance, a laugh slipping out with every other word, “What? All I did was say hi.”

You craned your head to the side, every inch on your body screaming at you to punch him, “Yeah, you pop out of nowhere right as I was about to shoot a fucking arrow through a place where there’s people I could possibly hit!”

He tsked, “I don’t see how that’s my problem, really, you shouldn’t even be shooting arrows in a crowded place anyways.”

He didn’t bother hiding the growing smirk on his face as you closed your eyes while taking a deep breath in.

You turned around opening your eyes and walked towards your target without saying another word, “It’s kind of rude to leave in the middle of a conversation, babe.”

You threw a middle finger back at him, you could feel a migraine forming as you hear him yell out an irritating “Love you too!”

✩ ✩

You set down your bow finally having used all your arrows, and a complete practice session. You allowed yourself to feel slightly smug as you walked towards the target, all arrows but one scattered all over the tens. The other one on the bullseye.

“Wow, you actually hit the target.”

And just like that your migraine is back.

“I’ve been hitting the target ever since I picked up a bow and arrow.”

“Ok nimrod, I see you.”

You slowly turn your head towards Kenji, “What did you just call me?” You reached for an arrow causing Kenji to lift his hands in the air as if he was surrendering.

“I called you a skillful hunter.”

“That’s not what a nimrod is—“

“Yes it is—“

“No, it is not—“

“If dictionaries were around I’d tell you to look through one, but for now you’re gonna have to trust me on this—“

“You’re a fucking nimrod!”

“Thanks—?”

“It’s not a compliment!”

Kenji looked at you amused. You were so easy to rile up. “Alright, alright. You can ask Juliette to ask Warner if you really think I’m lying.”

You roll your eyes turning to the target and start pulling of your arrows, “Yeah I just might.”

“Do you need help with that?” Kenji took a step forward not really waiting for an answer. Using your free hand you pushed against Kenji’ chest, not realizing the implication you might’ve sent him.

“It’s fine, you might break one.”

Kenji stayed still for a moment— and only just that, not a second too short or long. “‘m not that clumsy.”

“Don’t want to take any chances.” As you pulled off the last arrow you turned yourself to Kenji, “Why are you here?”

His back straightened as if he was waiting for you to ask that, “Wanna have dinner?”

You cringed at him, “It’s too late for that.”

He raised a brow, “That’s your excuse?”

You rolled your eyes again, “Sure.” Without saying another word you turn on your heel and walk away from him, leaving him alone in the target zone— Kenji knew better than to follow.

Still, he didn’t bother saying any flirty last minute quips as you gathered your stuff and left the training area. He had more pressing thoughts going through his head.

He knew he annoyed you, hell, you annoyed him too. Your keen air that never applied with him, your short and straight to the point responses, the way your eyes bored into his, the way you never needed his help because you were so skilled in everything you do. The way that you’ve never looked at him the way you do your target, determined, focused, that pure hunger for hitting the target— all your attention on it.

The way you don’t hide your dislike for him, never wanting to be near him, never wanting to touch him, never wanting him.

It drew him insane, the way you were so distant with him despite being right there.

So when you touched his chest just a few minutes ago, showing him a new side of you— one that isn’t revolted at the thought of touching him— it was enough to make him want more. To want you more.

But— he knew these feelings were one sided, and he respected that despite how much he teases you. He only hopes you could grow to see him as a friend, that much would suffice.

✩ ✩

It was practically common knowledge that you didn’t exactly like Kenji Kishimoto. You had a scowl on your face every time he spoke with you, you’d reject all invitations—professional and casual—from him, and you never batted an eye whenever he got hurt.

So your current actions had everyone’s attention on you and him.

“How did you even get hurt,” you lightly lift his arm so you could wrap his bicep with the gauze, “You can literally turn invisible.”

“Yeah, invisible. Not into a ghost.”

You scoffed, extremely annoyed more so than usual. “Still, why did you even make yourself visible?”

He cocked his head to you, eyes boring into yours, “Because I didn’t realize we were going to get fucking attacked.”

He turned his head away from you, for the first time being the one to end the conversation short. An uncomfortable feeling settled in your stomach at the realization for some reason, you pushed it off as just being worried about a friend.

Friend?

You finished wrapping the gauze around his arm, shaking your inner thoughts away you grabbed another roll of gauze, “Can you take off your shirt? I have to gauze it.”

“Yeah, you don’t have to tell me that, I know. Why else would you ask me to take it off.” You furrowed your brows, the feeling getting worse.

You forced yourself to look away as he took off his shirt, only looking back when he said you could.

It was silent as you wrapped the gauze around his torso and chest, uncomfortably silent. You’ve had to re-wrap it multiple times already, this being the third. It was weird. Kenji was acting weird.

“Hey, you ok?”

You jumped at the sound of his voice, dropping the gauze. You sighed not sure what was wrong with you today, “Sorry, yeah I’m fine.”

Kenji watched the wrapped gauze loosen itself around his body, unwrapping it fully with his own hands, “You sure?”

He handed you the gauze messily thrown together, looking at you with that stupid expression of worry as if he wasn’t acting like he was annoyed to be receiving help from you just a few minutes ago.

You carefully grabbed the gauze from his hands not wanting to hurt his already wrapped fingers, “I should be asking you that.”

“Perfectly fine sweetheart, thanks for asking,” he replied sarcastically, his back facing you slowly making you irritated.

You swallowed the insults that were sitting just on the tip of your tongue, “It’s my job—“

“Yeah, mhm, no need to remind me.”

“Ok, what the hell is wrong with you today?” You set down the gauze and focused your attention to his face—his eyes—“What’s with the attitude?”

His gaze settled somewhere behind you, probably at Juliette, before meeting your gaze with an irritating smile, “‘m hurt. Not really in the mood to kiss your ass today.”

You narrowed your eyes at him, “Kiss my ass?”

His eyes dropped to one of your hands, “Are you gonna finish wrapping the gauze around me now, or am I going to have to go to sleep with my wound out in the open?”

Ignoring him you say, “So being a decent human being is kissing someone’s ass now?”

He raised a brow, “Uh, no?”

You furrowed your brows at him, the feeling of annoyance not coming to you—but instead a dreading feeling of sadness?

“Then why are you acting like this?”

“Like what?”

“Like this,” you motion to Kenji, “Like it’s a burden to be in here.”

Kenji’ previous irritation turned into amusement. You were right, it was a burden to be in here, to be with you.

It was childish and Kenji knew he was being childish, he told himself he was fine just being your friend— and he is! Was. That only lasted for a few more days. He didn’t know how else to get your attention and now that he finally has it, he can’t help but be petty. The only way he could get your attention was if he was hurt, and it made him feel pathetic.

“Well you’d be a terrible nurse.”

You rolled your eyes. You weren’t sure what response you were expecting from him. No, it’s not a burden, I like being with you! Kenji is incapable of showing you in particular genuine emotion, it was stupid to want to hear something else.

“Thanks, such a nice thing to say.”

“You’re welcome.”

The next few minutes you took wrapping the gauze around his torso was filled with silence, just as the rest of the night.

✩ ✩

“Come on, we have to get you back.”

You tug the arm leaning against the back of your neck to tighten Kenji’ grip as you mustered the strength to support his body weight once you stood up.

“Wow, you didn’t say something rude to me.”

“Well you’re hurt, scolding you isn’t my priority right now,” you clear your throat in an attempt to cover up the way your voice broke mid-sentence.

Kenji began to laugh but got cut off with a groan as his newest wound rubbed against the cloth of your clothing.

You winced and adjusted the way he was leaning against you, “Sorry.”

Kenji eyed you suspiciously, “Woah, is this really the Y/N I know?”

“Kenji, shut up—“

“An “I’m sorry.” Wow that’s new,” he continues, “What did you do with the real Y/N.”

You ignore his teasing, focusing on getting the two of you out of this place. After a few minutes, Kenji quiets down. He’s gotten heavier, depending more on your body to support his as his head starts to tilt side to side.

You tighten your grip around his waist, “Kenji, we’re almost there.”

He slurs out an “okay” as his head finally finds a place to rest on—your head.

The worried feeling you’ve had since you found him starts to become more intense at his act of weakness, and it only continues to get worse until you see the base.

“Finally,” you whisper. Kenji presses his head impossibly closer to yours, you shudder when you realize how close you two are to each other.

His entire body is practically on you. His head leaned against yours, his arm that has fallen to your lower back, his upper body rested right against yours, and his legs so close they bump against yours as you walk. Your breath hitched when you felt his hand wrap around the arm that was wrapped around his waist.

“How do you feel?”

Kenji doesn’t respond for a few seconds. “Could be better.”

You drop the conversation after his answer, you’re assuming that he probably doesn’t want to talk while he’s bleeding from his side. It’s been about two weeks since your little moment with him and the gauze, this is the first time you’ve actually spoken to him since— and he’s definitely been on your mind.

“Did you get hurt?” You ignore the tingling sensation you get when he start to rub circles against your arm.

“I’m alright.”

“That’s good, would’ve made the entire worthless if you did.”

You slightly falter in your steps, “You going visible nearly caused us to lose you. That would’ve been a huge loss for us, Kishimoto.”

He laughed and you could feel the vibrations from where his head and yours connected, “Not as huge of a loss as losing you.”

You furrow your brows at his words, “No, your invisibility is crucial for us. I still don’t understand why you went visible again.”

“Went visible for you.”

The words went straight over your head, “Ok, and the first time?”

“Went visible for you then too.”

“That’s a dumb excuse, at least try to make it logical—“

“I went visible for you. Both times,” he says, voice slightly raised, then cringes at the new wave of pain that hits him, and only then do you process his words.

You want to stop walking to be able to face him and take to him face to face, but your top priority is to get him to Sara and Sonya so this awkward position will have to do, “Why would you go visible for me?”

“To make sure the fuckers that were going after you went after me instead.”

You knew Kenji had some kind of favoritism towards you with how often he’d seek you out but you assumed that was only because you didn’t drool over him when you first saw him.

“I would’ve been able—“

“To protect yourself, yes I know. You’re a nimrod, but you aren’t invincible. You were out in the open with no good hiding places, whereas with me, I can turn invisible.”

“And then you ended up getting hurt!”

“—I was able to escape,” he winces when his wound rubs against you again, “I was able to get away,” he repeats, “because of my invisibility.”

That didn’t matter to you though, what mattered— still— was that he got hurt and it only made it worse now that you know he technically got hurt because of you, “And because of me, you had a huge wound on your chest, and because of me again, you have a new wound down the side of your body.”

He grunted, you force yourself to think it was solely because of the pain since the thought of Kenji being upset was strangely upsetting for you.

“Well you’re welcome anyways—“

“—I’m not afraid of death, Kenji,” you interrupt, “I’d much rather die than see you get hurt for me.”

Kenji stayed quiet for a few seconds, and as you took more steps the seconds turned into minutes before he spoke again, “I feel the same with you.”

Despite being upset about him putting himself in the line of fire for you, you couldn’t help the smile that started to form at his words. You slightly adjust your grip around his waist, “Since we feel the same about the topic, let’s make a promise?”

“What kind?” 

“Stop trying to protect me—“

“Hey—“

“—Just listen, would you?” His silence gave you the chance to continue, “And I’ll be more careful so you won’t be forced to protect me.”

You felt him press his head harder against yours again, “….Ok.”

“Deal?” You continue, not considering “ok” as a reasonable answer.

“Yeah, yeah…ok, deal.”

✩ ✩

“Let’s go get dinner.”

Kenji nearly choked on his water. You, asking him, to get dinner? What the hell was up with you?

“Uh, are you ok?”

“Yes?” You’re holding your bow and arrow since you just finished shooting at some targets, and now you were hungry. Kenji always asked to get dinner so you didn’t have to think hard about asking him to come with.

“Oh, ok. Sure—“

“Great, come on,” you grab Kenji’ hand and don’t take a second longer to start dragging him behind you, “We might miss dinner.”

Kenji’ eyes widen behind you, you’ve been a lot more touchy with him these past few month since you found him bleeding out from his upper body. Don’t get him wrong, he’s not complaining. It’s just a nice change.

Before he knows it, you let go of his hand as the both of you enter the eating area. You’re quick to get his food as he chases after you trying to keep up with your quick pace.

“You always this active at night?” He asks as you pick up two pairs of utensils for the both of you.

“Depends on what’s happening, but more so yes then no.”

“Alright,” he whispers as you speed walk away from him and to a table.

“So, how was your day?” You ask when he sits down in front of you, your fork properly mixing your food together.

“It was alright. How was yours, nimrod?”

You laugh a little at the nickname, you’ve indeed asked Warner straight up if the word had any other definition than idiot, and he confirmed it to have meant how Kenji defined it too.

“Same as any other day,” you look up from your food to glance at Kenji, “How are your wounds?”

Kenji let out a disgruntled sigh, “It’s been six months, I’m completely fine, stop worrying about them.”

You’re about to argue him on that but decide that it’s not worth fighting over, “I just want to make sure you’re ok.”

“I’m perfectly fine.”

“That’s good,” you reply slightly dejectedly, feeling as if you annoyed him. You avoid looking up at him and focused on the food in front of you.

Kenji, who was also in front of you, felt bad. Even though you weren’t looking at him, you still had those puppy dog eyes, and Kenji wanted to scream at himself.

You just cared, you were only concerned about his well being, if anything he should be happy. All he’s ever wanted was your care and now he has it and he’s fumbling hard. So he reluctantly taps the space in front of your food causing you to look at him.

Fucking puppy dog eyes, “Thank you for asking though.”

For some reason, for literally no reason at all, Kenji doesn’t go along with the saying “Thank you.” It feels awkward, and it shows with how stiff his movements have suddenly become.

“Oh—you’re welcome.” You respond with a smile as if he thanked you for finding the cure for all sicknesses.

Kenji responded with only a nod before picking up his utensils and beginning to eat. Silence settled between the two of you, you kept your head down only looking up to see how much Kenji has eaten only to meet Kenji’ eyes directly which caused you to drop your head quicker than the speed of your arrows.

You aren’t sure when it started, you think it was when you found him knocking on deaths door but it might’ve been from even before that.

Kenji doesn’t annoy you anymore. Suddenly the days went from dreading the moment you’d meet him throughout the day to waiting hopelessly for when he’d come around. You think, no, you’re sure it’s because of the promise you’ve made, it makes you feel closer to him as if he was an actual friend.

But that’s not all, suddenly, you went from only seeing him for his invisibility ability to seeing him as come kind of comfort place.

It was killing you to know if he still thought of you that way too.

Kenji on the other hand kept his eyes on you as he ate, not because he wanted too, but to make sure you didn’t choke on your food with how fast you were eating it.

“Hey, slow down a bit, you’re gonna end up choking and dying.”

And you do just that, you slow down.

Kenji tilts his head, admittedly a little worried, “So why’d you—“

“—Why did you—,” the both of you ask at the same time.

“Oh, sorry,” you say, “Continue.”

“No,” he replied quickly, “You can go first.”

You stare at him expectantly. Then you continue, “Ok,” you take a short inhale before locking eyes with him again, eyes sharp and attentive, “Why did you always follow me around?”

He widens his eyes for a second, suddenly unable to speak. Why did he always follow you around?

“You were new.”

You keep eye contact with him, hoping he’d say more but he didn’t. Unsatisfied with his answer give him a short nod and only say, “Right.”

Kenji can’t help but feel that he did something wrong by your reaction, but it was true! Well, half true.

He clears his throat, the air suddenly suffocating, “So…why’d you invite me to dinner again?”

Nervousness started to creep into your veins, you weren’t sure if you wanted to risk everything and confess or just call it night.

Little did you know that Kenji wasn’t asking for new information, but was looking for confirmation.

You mumbled something, something he didn’t quite hear.

“What?”

You mumble again, somehow even more quieter than the last time.

“What?”

“For fuck’s sake Kenji,” you grumble out, “Why did you use to invite me out for dinner?”

“What—?”

You interrupt him, “I like being around you,” you say half truthfully, “And—“ you’re about to say the entire truth but decide against it feeling self conscious all of a sudden.

“And I was hungry.”

You start to fiddle with your fingers when he doesn’t respond immediately.

“And that’s all?” He finally asks.

And you reply, “Yes,” with a heavy heart.

“Well that’s…a little stupid.”

You whip your head up, confused at his words, “What?”

He snorts, “Now you’re saying what,” he mumbles. He takes a bite out of his food before speaking again, “It’s just kind of a dumb excuse.”

You narrow your eyes at him, even more confused now, “It’s not an excuse.”

He gives you a nod fakely agreeing with you, “Yeah, I mean, the reason why I always asked you out for dinner was definitely because I was just hungry,” he nods again, “No other reason.”

You look at him suspiciously, eyes still narrowed, “Okay…”

Kenji waits for a second seeing if you’d do anything else and he internally shakes his head when you don’t, “Ah, fuck it,” he groans out, “Hey, I like you.”

This gets you to drop the narrowed expression and cause you to widen your eyes, “You—“

“Yes, like, I like you.”

You look at him dumbfounded, eyes widened and mouth dropped open. You weren’t really expecting a confession tonight so the whole thing threw you off.

Kenji, the saint that he is, kept the conversation going. With a cheeky smile he leaned forward, elbows on the table and his hands supporting his head, “Wanna try answering my question again?”

You blinked, once, twice. You dropped your gaze from him trying to recollect your thoughts and the ability to form coherent thoughts.

“Um,” you begin, “I…”

“Mhm,” he hummed egging you on.

“I like you,” you say almost as an exhale. You close your eyes for a few moments feeling like you just ran a marathon.

A smile formed on Kenji’ face, one unbeknownst to you, but it was stifled by him as quickly as it came. “That doesn’t really answer my question though,” he playfully tsks.

You slowly open your eyes, your entire body feeling warm. You raise a brow, giving him the silent question of what do you mean?

He shakes his head as if he’s disappointed as he leans closer to you, “Still doesn’t tell me why you asked me out for dinner.”

You slowly tilt your head, “It’s because I like you.”

“Yeah, well a lot of people like me sweetie,” he tilts his head to the side mirroring your body language, “However not everyone asks me to get dinner with them.”

You’re sure he’s teasing you judging from his tone and how he mirrors your own body, but you play along nonetheless, “Because not everyone has romantic feelings for you, Kenji, not like me.”

“Oh,” he teases, “So you have romantic feelings for me now? What happened to the nimrod I knew just a few months ago who never wanted to spend time with me?”

You roll your eyes, your composure quickly coming back to you, “Doesn’t matter.”

“No?”

“Kenji,” you say as you close your eyes again, getting affectionately annoyed, “Why are you teasing me?”

“What would you rather me do, sweetie?”

You groan at the term of endearment, your brain getting mushy at the thought of being intimate with him, “There’s a lot I’d rather you do.”

“Like?” He asks, egging you on again.

You look down at his lips then back to his eyes, then back to his lips again, and you decide to stay like this.

“Kissing sounds like a good idea, yeah?”

Kenji raises a brow, “You want to make out in front of the kitchen staff?” He asks feigning innocence.

You shake your head at his sarcasm at push yourself away from the table and him. “Uh—where are you going?” Kenji asks as you get up from the table.

“My room,” you say nonchalantly as you throw away your half eaten food.

“Wait,” you stop mid stride as he yelled out to you, “You don’t want to make out anymore?”

You chuckle at how those words sound coming from his mouth, “Just go to my room?”

“It’s a little difficult to not raise suspicion if I go there, no?”

You shrug, “Just turn invisible. That’s one of the reasons why it’s such a beneficial ability to have.”

Kenji opens his mouth but nothing comes out. He drops his head, nodding at your wonderful idea. “Yeah,” he chuckles, “I’ll be over in a few minutes.”

Old habits die hard, so you nod and turn around being the one to end the conversation—and you try not to run down the hall.

[heybank]

DENY PART TWO

ok i think i might make a series about my jj x reader x pope fic

also kind of dedicated to @starfxkr bc their blog gets me through the jj pope drought that is on tumblr (if you don't wanna be tagged i'll totally delete but i luv you even tho i don't know you

this isn't technically a part two but it's inspired by my previous fic deny

i'm hoping to maybe fully flesh out a whole mini story about them bc i love jj and pope so bad and i wanna kiss them both and have them kiss each other.

please send me prompts or if you have any ideas or you just wanna gush about jj and pope 💜

i'm a cancer, ok

you've always felt your emotions more deeply than others. you have a lot of feelings and it's not uncommon for you to start tearing up at random times throughout the day when you see something that elicits a strong feeling from you.

kie says it's because you're a cancer and while she's so true because you are the stereotypical emotional water sign, you're not sure how much of your mental state is because of your astrological sign or if you're genuinely a few screws loose in the head.

you remember hiccuping and sobbing into jjs shirt for the better part of half an hour- staining his sleeveless tee with your tears all because you saw a seagull missing a foot and he seemed to be running slower than his other seagull friends. your only relief from the obvious heartbreaking situation was jj softly murmuring comforting words in your ear, his strong arms around circled around your waist, your body snuggled onto his lap. the scene isn't uncommon for the pogues to see. the two of you have always been more affectionate than most.

all of this leads you to where you are now, curled up on your bed sobbing. soft sad music playing in the background making you sob even more. you put on a brave face with your friends but in the sanctuary of your own bed is where you can finally let your feelings free.

seeing pope and jj kiss hurt you more than you originally thought. your mind keeps replaying the scene of the two boys kiss, their lips moving together sensually, saliva being shared. you're sure that if you hadn't interrupted them, the kiss would lead to something more and involving less clothes.

hey google, play "that should be me" by justin bieber.

what if when they start dating they drop you? what if pope isn't comfortable with how touchy or affectionate you are with jj and he stops your cuddles or what if jj doesn't want you to hang out alone with pope because he knows you two kissed. what if they stop needing you because they have each other?

the thought makes a sob crawl up your throat and fat tears roll down your cheeks. you feel like your head is going to explode from how hard your crying. you need them like air, you felt like that even before you and pope kissed and before you realized you're in love with jj. you need them because they're your closest friends- they're the family you so desperately crave because your own doesn't care much for you and you're so scared if they start dating each other then they won't need you.

it's why you give out your love so freely, the feeling of being needed by people is something that is so deeply and inherently buried in your bones. when someone needs you and you can help them, it feels euphoric. a psychologist would probably have a field day with you because if you're not needed, what good are you?

----

"i'm really confused after our kiss" pope mumbles, nervous to look at jj in the eyes.

"good or bad confused" jj responds.

"is there such thing as good confusion?" pope asks, eyebrows furrowed and lips pursed. "i didn't think i was gay or bi or whatever and yeah i think some dudes are hot but like i've never wanted to kiss them but i wanted to kiss you!! and then we kissed and it was like... nice but different and i couldn't help but think about gracie and how she and i kissed and how good that also felt and then i felt guilty and-"

"pope, take a breath" the maybank boy utters, effectively cutting off popes rambles.

"i liked kissing you pope. i never let myself be attracted to dudes but it's you, ya know?" jj continues.

"but i also understand wanting to kiss grace. i... well i want to kiss her too." he finally confesses. he's never said his feelings for his grace out loud before.

pope gently stumbles over to where the maybank boy is perched on his bed, he leans in to grab jjs fidgeting hands, grasping them in what he hopes is a comforting hold.

he leans forward so he can give jj a small peck on the cheek. reassuring him that they're ok, that they'll make it through whatever turmoil they're feeling right now.

jj grabs popes face and brings him in for a deeper kiss, lips and tongues touching. it makes jjs stomach burn with desire. after several minutes or maybe hours of kissing, he's not sure, pope reaches up and pulls on jjs soft blond tresses, tugging on the boys hair a little to pull him away from popes lips. they both let out little gasps when they disconnect.

"have you heard of polyamory?" pope asks jj... a shit eating grin on his lips.

---

giggling and kicking my feet. i love them 💜

[nattinatalia]

Jack Harlow x Reader : THAT’S NOT MAMA!

Your husband had just texted you from his at home studio that the official trailer for his movie, White Men Can’t Jump, was out.

You had suggested watching it together in the living room, kids included, to see their reaction to their dad doing something else other than music.

“Ugh dad I was playing.” Ez says grumpily.

“You’ll go back soon, let’s just watch this real quick.” The four of you are sitting across the television.

You’re biting your nails due to nerves. He did warn you about some specific scenes, but you told him you understood.

“Ohhh daddy, is this your movie?” Mia asks, the trailer already playing.

“Yeah bug, this is it.” Jack tells her proudly.

“What is a white girl in Whole Foods?” Ez asks.

You and Jack share a laugh but continue watching it, the kids asking little questions here and there.

“Boo-boo juice that’s funny and looks nasty daddy.”

“Yeah I don’t wanna drink that. Yuck.” Ezequiel pretends to barf.

Mia gasps, “Daddy, that’s not nice.”

“What?”

“You making fun of his ears.”

“It’s part of the movie bug.” You tell her.

“Did you say sorry after?”

Jack nods, “I did princess.”

Once the trailer was over, you see Ezequiel whispering something in Mia’s ear. They both turn to look at Jack.

“Can we watch it again?” Mia asks him.

Of course Jack plays it again for them.

“STOP PAUSE.” Ez yells.

“What?” You ask him, getting worried.

“See Mia, there.” Ezequiel stands up and points to the television.

Mia stands up and walks towards her brother and they have a mini conversation you can’t hear. Both their little arms are making movements in the air.

Once they are done, they both turn to look at Jack and glare at him.

“W-what did I do?” He’s confused, looking at you then back at the kids.

“THAT.” Ez points. “NOT MOMMA. YOU IN BIG TROUBLE.”

“You can’t kiss other girls daddy, that’s bad bad, like really bad.” Mia tells him, her eyes are getting watery.

“Do you not love mommy?”

You cover your mouth with your hand, trying to muffle your laugh from the kids.

“What? Of course I love mommy.”

“Then why kiss other girl huh?” Ez asks him, his hands on his waist.

“It’s just a movie, little man, it’s fake.”

“Fake? I see it there, kissing her and laughing. It’s no funny.”

“Ezequiel, some movies or most movies aren’t real. It’s acting, you’ll understand more when you’re a bit older. But I promise you, I love your mommy.” Jack tries to reassure the kids.

“You okay momma?” Your sons come up to you, holding your hands.

You smile at him. “Yes my baby boy, I’m totally fine.”

“Okay.” He then walks to Jack. “Cool movie.” They fist bump and Ezequiel walks out the living room and back to the playroom.

Mia is standing by the television.

“You okay bug?” Jack asks her.

“You and mommy okay? You not moving houses like Nino Urby and Nina?”

“Oh baby.” Jack carries her to his chest. “I promise you, mommy and I are more than okay. We love each other so much, we’re not going anywhere.”

“That hurt my feelings, but you sound funny in your movie daddy. You’re a star.” Mia tells him, while playing with his beard.

“Thank you princess.” He kisses her head and sets her down.

“No more being sad baby, like daddy told Ez, it’s all part of the movie. Your daddy isn’t going anywhere.” You reassure your daughter.

“Okay mommy.” She hugs you. “Going to make sure Cheesy isn’t doing a mess.” She runs off to the playroom.

Jack is staring at you with raised eyebrows. “What Jackman?”

“Our kids were ready to knock me out.”

You chuckle. “No they were not.”

“Babe, yes they were, I was scared for my life. I thought Ezequiel was about to punch me.”

“You’re so dramatic.” You laugh, going up to him and wrapping your arms around his neck.

“I’m proud of you though.”

That makes him smile, he places his hands on your ass. “Yeah? Even with the kiss scene?”

“The kids gave you enough shit about it, I’ll save my comments to myself.” You play with his KY chain, your favorite chain on him.

“Oh so you did feel some type of way about it?” He squeezes both ass cheeks, smirking about it.

You roll your eyes and playful smack him on his chest. “You are loving this aren’t you?”

He nods, “It takes me back to when you first showed your jealous side.”

“We are not going there Jackman.” You glare at him, but then smile. “But I’ll get my revenge for it though, you just wait and see.”

“Wait what?”

“My next music video, let’s just say it’s not YouTube appropriate.”

“Y/N that’s not fair.”

“It’s okay baby, because it’s all fake right?” You smirk and get on your tippy toes to peck him. “But I am proud of you bubs, I can’t wait to watch it.”

“Maybe without the kids?” He suggests.

You laugh at that, “If you don’t want mini glares the entire time, then yes that’s best.”

You two share a kiss and you continue to tell him how proud you are of him. He gets shy whenever you praise him, so you enjoy it every single time.

“MOM, DAD, EZEQUIEL IS ANNOYING.”

“NO I’M NOT.”

“YES YOU ARE, STOP SAYING THAT.”

You and Jack share a look and smile.

“DON’T WORRY MAMI.. DON’T WORRY MAMI. DON’T WORRY MAMI.” Ezequiel yells out plenty of times, probably to annoy his sister even more.

“What are you saying?” You laugh, walking into the playroom.

“It’s from daddy’s movie, his friend was saying it.” Ez shrugs, referring to Sinqua Walls' line.

“He’s being annoying dad.”

“No I’m not.”

“Yes, and it’s mommy not mami.” Mia huffles in annoyance. “You don’t even make sense.”

“Uncle Sunni calls the girls mami, so I do know.”

“Okay, enough kids.”

“Oh can I get a flame gun for Christmas? Like in your movie?”

“NO.”

“Maybe next time we won’t show them any of our future projects.” You suggest.

Jack nods, “Sounds like a plan.”

•

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