#yeah i just got like super overwhelmed with uncomfortable feelings about this
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Kinda scared this boobvember daily prompt thing is gonna completely ruin how I want my blog to be perceived per se. Like yeah, I'm not necessarily opposed to these things being here from time to time, but I just feel like with how concentrated full-on nsfw stuff'd be if I kept up with and posted from that prompt list every day this month that I'd be warping what I want my blog to be.
Yeah, my characters can be appealing, but I just don't want that to be the only thing they're seen as, y'know? I'm afraid they would only be seen as something sexual or something because that's what I've inadvertently connected them to. Who knows, maybe I'm overthinking this, and people are better than just immediate ojectification, but I've seen so much of that exact thing that I'm just really scared. My OCs are fully fleshed out people who have stories. Who've lived whole lives
All of this to say I might not actually publically post a whole lot of these at all, if any anymore. That's not how I want my characters to be seen.
#hat talks#yeah i just got like super overwhelmed with uncomfortable feelings about this#i'll keep the two that are already up here#apart from that though it probably wont be a consistent thing#ive already seen what happens if i just try to seep even a little bit of this kind of energy into my art and its that people immediately#assume im cool with having fully lived extensions of me (someone they dont know) objectifying things and i just#i dont wanna deal with that#mutuals i may dm some of the art if asked but dont bet on it#friends from beyond tumblr obv youll be seeing it#you get the point#i need to go chill the hell out and get some fpod in me
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Hmmmm
Preg!Mario but hes in his cat or tanooki suit >:3
Hi!
Anon you're the smartest of the anons ever and also thanks for giving me an excuse to feel less embarrassed of posting preg cat Mario here ajskdjak
Here's some ideas regarding the cat suit when Mario's preggy bc about the tanuki suit I've got like one:
-When Mario's with the cat suit, his body becomes cat-like (surprise :0 omg) and that means he's much more flexible, so he really likes to use the suit when he feels overwhelmed at how much he can't do now that his pregnancy's so advanced. When he's a cat he can stretch like he wants, his belly doesn't feel as cumbersome and he can even loaf for a lil' while (until it becomes uncomfortable, and he has to change positions).
>It's for those reasons that, let's say that at the last weeks of pregnancy, Mario sleeps at night with the suit on. He sleeps soundly and wakes up feeling very rested, never mind whichever weird position he was in, he feels great.
>Now this is a problem for Peach's sleeping, because since Mario's able to pull weirder positions to sleep in, she often finds herself with a very pregnant cat just sleeping on top of her and snoring the loudest he ever has. The whole night. She doesn't say much about it, she's glad that Mario is resting and sleeping well, because before they figured out the Super Bell, he couldn't move much when sleeping, since any change in position could alter his comfort. He could be laying in his side, and if he tips a bit too forward his belly starts pulling at his back and makes it ache, but if he tips too backwards, the weight of the babies makes him feel short of breath- so basically he can't do anything without feeling discomfort.
>Before Mario was pregnant, he moved everywhere too when he slept at night, but Peach could easily hold him and pin him down and whenever he moved, she just hugged him and manhandled him to her own comfort, he always slept so deeply that he didn't really notice that he was being thrown around like a doll. BUT it's much harder when the small guy is pregnant with twins, it isn't just harder to move him since he's heavier, but also, she doesn't want to cause him discomfort nor jostle the babies too much. She doesn't want to move him around this time either, and yeah, she could just scoot away from Mario, but he always unconsciously looks around for her body to get closer. So, Peach stays right in the middle of the bed, it's much better being uncomfortable there, than at a little corner where she's still going to have Mario right over her.
-About tanuki Mario, the fact that they gain some weight when they have the Super Leaf was not pulled from my heart, the source is here SJDKSJ from Super Mario Broth's twitter. Also, I think it was the racoon power-up, but honestly I don't get the difference between that one and the tanuki one hwdwh
>So, he just feels a bit less agile with the tanuki suit on, so he doesn't use it as much unless necessary- prefers the cat suit the most :y
-One morning Peach finally snaps, and pretty much yells at Mario that she can't take it any longer and she's so sleepy. Mario jumped in place from her outburst but kept listening silently while she rambled about how Mario stays almost on top of her ALL night and he wouldn't let her fall asleep and it's been so many nights already and if she goes another night without sleeping, she'll go crazy- and when she's breathing to get her air back after all that, he says almost shyly, why don't you use a Super Bell too?
>And Peach pauses to look at him and then at the ceiling in such a deep disappointment directed to herself that Mario feels bad for having to resist the urge to laugh. Why didn't I think of that-? she asks herself, raising a hand as if ready to smack her own forehead, but then she redirects the hand and points a finger at Mario, You- I think the pregnancy brain is contagious, she mutters, with a crazed look in her eyes that completely comes from not getting her usual eight hours of sleep each night. And now Mario can't resist the giggle that left him.
>From then on, each night both sleep soundly, yippie!!
-Btw I love drawing sleeping characters with drool, it's like they're having a really good sleep aksdjsaj
-BTW look at the first drawing I made of tanuki Mario last night, to figure out how it was JSKSJD the silly
-ALSO, it was Peach who gave the solution initially askjdasd
[Mario's laying on his side partially while complaining about his back, Peach comes up with the solution of the Super Bell, and then there's Cat Mario deeply asleep in the same position as before aksjdsa]
#super mario bros#my art#mareach#mareach preggy stuff#mareach family au#mario mario#princess peach#tanooki mario#cat mario#FR anon if you're the same from the Junior movie ask- keep those ideas coming akjsdasjd they're good#BTW the asks I haven't answered yet either I still don't know how to#or there's a WIP going on HWHW#SOWWY
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gekko x female reader where like basically finds her super attractive and is nervous to talk to her so reader starts to think he doesn’t like her since hes so social w the other agents I hope that kinda makes sense?? Also hes so bbg<33
FIRST IMPRESSIONS! gekko x f!reader ✴ fluff!! no warnings!
[note!!] ↳ i apologize for taking so long with requests, i was just overwhelmed and flooded with so many and then uni got super chaotic but we made it! merry christmas / happy holidays!
mateo’s introduction to the protocol went as smooth as being introduced to by reyna could go. he’s not sure exactly what she said to get him in, as it seemed to be pretty exclusive and he’s not entirely sure if he has the professionalism they were looking for.
he doesn’t, but they don’t seem to mind. well, brimstone has complained here and there about how difficult the boy was to reach, he never answered his phone or replied to his texts but the motherfucker was always on tiktok whenever the protocol held meetings.
he got away with a lot by practically being reyna’s little brother, everyone was too scared to do anything to reprimand the boy. other than viper of course, nothing scared that woman it seemed.
being one of the younger agents, and the newest, left him anxious, but as time went on, he’s gotten his own seat at the table. he knew what the first day jitters felt like, how everything was intimidating, and he had already known reyna prior and she still kind of scares him so he can’t imagine how intimidating the woman would be to you.
brim asked beforehand if anyone wanted to step up and show you the ropes, before gekko even had the chance to volunteer, almost every head in the room turned to him anyway.
“i’d be honored.” he bowed dramatically, turning to harbor, “i’ll make you proud coach!”
he didn’t. not because he was a bad coach necessarily, he just couldn’t get a proper sentence out without bumbling like a fool.
the new agent was really pretty, and mateo’s had crushes before in the past but nothing like this, where the moment he looked at her he felt the carpet pull out from under him.
nobody else seemed affected by your beauty, even chamber seemed too occupied with his work to ogle at you. the knowing looks from jett and phoenix only made him more flustered as he knew his attraction to you was written all over his face.
neon and raze were stifling laughter, watching his sad attempt at demonstrating how to defuse a spike.
“s-so yeah um .. after y’know c-clearing corners and stuff you uh… um usually brim will c-comm? yeah he’ll comm us uh let us know the game plan.” he clears his throat, looking down at his hands and shaking his head in an attempt to clear out his thoughts.
you watched him with such a kind expression on your face, it was almost a little infuriating how good you were at maintaining eye contact with him, mateo feels like he might die of heatstroke with how hot his face has become.
you notice how nervous he is and hesitantly reach for him, placing your hand on his shoulder.
“hey i know we just met and all, but i promise i'm not gonna kill you…” an awkward laugh accompanied your words, and you couldn’t hide some of the hurt in your voice. why was he so terrified of you? “i’m not! scared of you or anything-“
“did i do something that made you uncomfortable?”
“no! nothing like that you’re just uh..” he looks around the room, relieved when he sees the others seemed to have moved on from watching his horrible teaching skills.
he glances at his critters, dizzy curled up as always in slumber, wingman on the couch waving his arms excitedly in support of his train of thoughts.
he breathes deeply, before finally meeting eyes with you.
“you’re just really pretty.” he says, without stuttering, or losing eye contact, and the intensity of it all leaves a red hot flush to climb up your neck and up to your cheeks.
“o-oh.” you stutter, mind going a mile a minute because what the fuck do you even say to that? you just met him, but you can’t deny how attractive he is too. you bite back a smile and look down in embarrassment.
“thank you… that’s sweet of you to say.”
“yeah but i just made things weird.”
“no you didn’t, things don’t have to be weird if we don’t make it weird.” you reassure, nudging his shoulder.
“now you said something about brim giving comms, do we wait for an OK before defusing or should we defuse as soon as we reach the site?”
he was grateful for the change in topic, and with that finally off his chest he was able to finally get his wavering voice back under control.
“yeah so he’ll comm with the OK; if everything is clear and it’s safe to defuse then go for it and regroup before evacuating.”
your first mission goes surprisingly well, gekko at your side through the whole thing, watching your back with every corner you turned and alerting you of enemies you missed before taking care of them himself.
he was the perfect partner anyone could ask for really, so when the other agents were hyping you up for your performance you couldn’t help but redirect the praise to mateo.
every mission went on like that, a success, the two of you made an incredible team. it wasn’t until six months later, on one of the biggest missions you’ve yet to go on, that you really showed the other agents in the protocol just how much you’ve grown.
“that quick scope was insane even reyna was impressed!” phoenix says over the sound of his comrades whooping and cheering you on.
“who knew our new agent would be our new little prodigy?” jett cooed, pinching at your cheeks. you swat her hand away, laughing at her teasing.
“nah it was all gekko and really i wouldn’t have gotten off that shot without dizzy and the spike wouldn’t have been defused without wingman. i just have the best coach, right ‘teo?” you turn to look at him and he grins, throwing an arm over your shoulder and pulling you into a side hug.
“of course hermosa, with me showing you the ropes you’ll kick everyone’s ass, radiant or not.”
his little compliment left you flustered, quick to hide your face into his neck, before feeling the vibrations of his laughter rumbling against his chest. he tilts his head down to peek at you,
“why’re you hidin’ chica?” he smirks knowingly, you were always so easy to fluster, it was incredibly endearing.
he pouts his lips out in a kissy face, laughing when you groan and roll your eyes at him.
the other agents watch silently as the two of you, almost in your own world, tease and bicker with each other back and forth, mateo’s arms still wrapped around your waist.
“i dunno why i let you take all the glory for our missions, i’m gonna stop being humble-“
“you? humble? chalè chica have you met yourself?” his words are all bark no bite, if the grin on his face was any indication.
you stuck your tongue out at him, and he sticks his right back, blowing a raspberry in your face and laughing when you yell and swat at him for spitting on you.
jett and neon share a knowing look, they bet on how long it’d take for the two of you to get together, and neon couldn’t hide the smirk on her face.
“not too late to forfeit~”
“no way, they’ve been dancing around each other like this for months im telling you they’re both too dumb to do anything for at least another two months-“
“yea like how it took you and phoenix two years to finally confess to each other?” she teased before quickly ducking the fist jett sent her way.
“wish someone would look at me like that.” chamber mutters, glancing over at viper who whistles absently, busying herself with some papers on her desk that suddenly need to be reorganized.
“can you let me go now?” you whined at him, giving him your most promising pout, he tilted his head in faux consideration, before shrugging,
“nah. don’t want to.”
“so you’re just gonna hold me hostage here?”
“don’t act like you don’t love it.”
“i don’t, you spat on me.”
“okay and you drooled on me on the way back to base-“
“shut up! you were the one who insisted i slept on your shoulder-“
“yeah because i didn’t wanna deal with you whining later about your neck hurting-“
“teo, let me go so i can punch you.”
“no can do, hermosa.”
“i’ll knee you in the balls.”
he pouts again, debating if he should free you from his embrace, before he gets the chance to, you lean forward on your tiptoes and plant an obnoxious smooch on his lips, prying yourself free from him when he loosens his grip in surprise.
“HA!” you laugh maniacally, running away from the boy who was already chasing you,
“oh so that’s how you’re gonna play huh?” he yells, ignoring brimstone who is shouting at the two of you to stop running around HQ.
“did you not just see what she did!” he whines like a child, glaring at neon and jett who are trying to stifle their laughter to no avail.
you run and hide behind raze and killjoy on the couch, catching your breath, you peek your head over and spot mateo,
“you’re harboring a criminal, release her.” he declares to the couple, and raze rises, holding her arms out in front of you, blocking you away from gekko.
“you gotta get through me first.” she stands firm, winking at killjoy who only rolls her eyes at the idiocy happening before her.
“can you guys take this fight back to the playground please?” she asks, turning over on the couch to look down at you. you hold your finger to your lips, a dramatic sh! the only response offered to her.
she tries to flick your forehead but you are quick to swat her hand away, earning a snort from the engineer before she turns to sit forward on the couch.
“what are her crimes even?” killjoy asks and you feel your face burning before mateo even opens his mouth.
“i was holding her hostage in a hug and she kissed me to escape-“
“oh god gross-“ raze’s arms falter.
“are you two fucking serious?” neon says in fake disgust.
“ew guys get a room-“ killjoy remarks with a loud groan.
“GROSS!” chamber shouts from across the room.
with you defenseless, mateo is quick to dive over the couch, grabbing you and throwing you over his shoulder in one fell swoop.
he ignores your shouts and demands to be put down as he carries you away to an empty meeting room, closing the door behind him with his foot before setting you down with a mischievous smirk on his face.
“look at the scene you caused, mensa. now everyone knows about your dirty little tricks.” he had you pushed up against the door, his face incredibly close to yours, and you were suddenly grateful he had carried you off like that, away from the eyes of your comrades who probably have an idea of what’s going on back here anyways.
the close proximity leaves you flustered, but the competitive side of you can’t seem to back down to mateo.
“didn’t expect you to get so worked up over a little kiss, you got a crush on me or something?” you teased, sounding more confident than you actually felt.
he leans closer, lips nearly touching yours before gliding upwards and caressing the shell of your ear.
“maybe i do, but the thing is cariño…” his lips trail down your cheek, stopping right over yours, “i think you like me too.” he breathes a laugh against you and it sets you aflame, your heart pounding incessantly in your chest.
“should i kiss you this time and find out?” his lips are centimeters away from your own, his hands that are now cupping your jaw tilt your head upwards to brush against his lips, a gasp slipping past them to which he chuckles amusedly at.
the anticipation of his touch practically eating you alive at this point, how desperate you are to feel his lips against yours again.. you swallow, biting back your pride before nodding,
“please… ‘teo-“
his lips are against yours in an instant, eager and passionate, moving with a desperation you hadn’t anticipated. you reach up to pull him closer by the neck, kissing him back with just as much passion and fervor.
he bites down on your lip, smirking against you when you whine and open up for him, he’s quick to use the opportunity to slip his tongue in to taste you properly.
sweet like saccharine, he couldn’t get enough, the feeling of your tongues intertwined has him dizzy, his brain short-circuiting.
he can’t believe he’s finally kissing you, finally tasting the lips he’s been craving since the day he first laid eyes on them.
you whine his name, muffled in between kisses as he sucks particularly hard on your tongue, leaving you breathless and desperate for air.
prying the boy off of you, you finally manage to catch your breath, panting harshly against him as he smirks at you.
“yeah you definitely like me, ‘please teo!’ he mocks and you hide your face in his neck, groaning and punching him lightly on the chest.
“you’re such an ass mateo."
[note!!] ↳ this might be ass, ngl i wrote it high on my phone at like 2am, i think the second half with all the other agents is kinda wild n messy but so is mateo so shhh. - feel free to send in more reqs!!
#gekko x reader#valorant x reader#mateo x reader#mateo armendáriz de la fuente x reader#gekko valorant x reader#valorant#gekko imagines#gekko scenarios#valorant imagines#valorant scenarios
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Can you write a one shot where Y/n is self harming and how Simon is reacting to that?
This is my first request!!!!!!!
Also, I’m so so so sorry for this, this isn’t how i expected it to turn out, also I have a severe migraine right now and can’t look at screen too much. I wrote it super fast. Apologies, and promise that i’ll write more soon.
Go ahead and request with an angst prompt !!
Pairing: Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley x GN!Reader
Summary: You used to self harm, but after attending military you stopped. Certain someone made you break, though.
Warnings: Graves is an asshole, no touching but cat calling?, Self harm, depression topics, kind of ooc simon, mentions of suicide…
Even though you were feeling down lately, your friends were always there for you. You knew it.
Your mental health wasn’t always perfect, and you knew it would take a while to heal. But even after healing, you knew it would always come back.
“It’s okay, you’re okay. I’m glad you chose me to vent about it.”
It was always easy to vent to Soap, he would always make you chuckle or smile.
“It’s cool y’know? I know why you’re feeling this way. But it will always get better.”
Gaz would pat your hair, cuddle you a little like a brother and give you a chocolate. He would make you smile.
Simon wasn’t there usually. And no, you wouldn’t seek comfort from him either way. You knew the man wasn’t a people person, and he wouldn’t do anything other than getting annoyed.
So after your mission went smoothly, everyone wanted to celebrate and drink. Not you for sure.
You weren’t feeling good and stable so you politely declined. This, of course drew your friends’ attention. You just told them you were tired, because you didn’t want them to miss out on their time. They finally accepted and left the base to have fun.
You, on the other hand wasn’t feeling too well. It was overwhelming, to feel that way after a success.
“Congratulations, soldier. But you missed your shot. It was a stupid thing to do, the target wasn’t even moving ahahah.”
You furrowed your eyebrows after remembering your commander’s words. Graves, he was something. He would constantly pick on you, even though he had told you he liked you. You couldn’t understand him, was he that kind of person who would bully their crushes? Yeah, no.
You shook your head, clearing your mind of those thoughts. You needed a bath, and the base was empty. You smiled to yourself weakly. This was going to be a long shower.
You closed your door, but didn’t lock it. You didn’t care because the base was empty. You stripped off your clothes and got in.
-
“Is she okay?”
Simon furrowed his eyebrows.
“Who?”
Soap rolled his eyes and cursed through the phone. He told him your name, and Simon cursed himself too.
“Didn’t know she was here,”
Simon swore that he heard Soap rolling his eyes.
“Whatever, I gotta go. Don’t get wasted, yeah?”
Simon didn’t wait for an answer before shutting the phone down. He got up and went to his bathroom, ready to take a shower. He locked the door before pulling his mask off.
He got in, warm water immediately softening his tense shoulders. He sighed and closed his eyes.
-
You had decided to grab something from the kitchen before combing your hair. So here you were, eating an apple while going to your room.
“Ooof, here you are.”
You stopped dead in your tracks after someone grabbed your shoulders from behind.
“Our talk was interrupted,”
You swallowed and smiled at him, even though his eyes were raking up and down your body. You shifted uncomfortably.
“Oh, uhm- yeah. I don’t see you like that-“
His hands moved to your waist and you gasped quietly.
“C’mon, we both know what you want. Don’t resist it.”
You pushed him hard enough to let him off and he just snorted.
“I told you. I don’t want you, Graves.”
He rolled his eyes.
“Is that why you wear these shorts huh? Why your hair is wet and free? Don’t play dumb, you want it. Don’t worry, even if you’re bad in bed it would worth it and I won’t tell anyone.”
He winked and that was the final straw. You kicked him in his crotch, and pushed him with all your force. He groaned and gritted his teeth.
“Fuckin’ bitch. You’re gonna regret that!”
You just walked hurriedly to your room and locked the door behind you.
You didn’t know when, but you had started crying. You sat down in front of your door and cried silently.
When you realized you had dropped your apple there, you started crying harder.
“Fuck,”
You sniffled and gripped your phone. But you couldn’t, they were having fun and you wouldn’t dare to ruin it.
You closed your eyes, tried doing the breathing techniques your therapist had taught you.
“I can’t believe you’re our teammate now, you should be a model.”
“I can keep you company, you know?”
“But you’re asking for it.”
“You don’t have a boyfriend? Such a shame, you have a good physique.”
“Believe me sweetheart, no one would talk to you if you weren’t that beautiful.”
“That pretty face is missing something, a smile?”
“Oh my God, be a lady and bow down to me will you? ahahah..”
“Fuck!”
You quickly got up, the voices in your head were ringing and ringing. Graves’ voice was ringing. It kept getting louder.
You opened your drawer and took out your knife, and held it in your hand for a second.
The voices are going to stop, you thought. It will get better if I do this, you convinced yourself.
You cut your wrist, hands shaky from the panic attack. Your breaths were unstable, shallow.
You cut your wrist again, the voices were now getting weaker.
“What the fuck is going on?!”
You jumped forward with the knife in your hand. Simon gasped for a second before holding you and looking at you.
“What happened?!”
Simon shook your shoulders, not knowing what to do. You were just as shocked as him, and didn’t move a muscle.
Simon’s eyes went up to your hair and down to your feet. His breath shook as he noticed the blood dropping from your cuts.
“What the- What did you do?!”
Simon quickly took the knife and threw it across the room, then he picked you up and carried you to the bathroom.
He put you down to the floor of the shower cabin and washed your face.
“Wait here, ‘kay? I’ll be back.”
He quickly went back to his room, grabbed the first aid kit and came rushing back.
He carefully took your wrist, inspected it and worked on it quietly.
You were still in shock, eyes looking empty at the ground. It was all so quick, and your mind wasn’t comprehending it.
Simon called your real name and you suddenly looked up. It was like a switch. You furrowed your eyebrows and looked at your wrist.
“Oh my God- I fuck!”
“Shh-“
You silently cried as he bandaged your wrist, thankfully you didn’t cut that deep.
After a minute or so, he got up and picked you up. He went towards your bed, and put you down. He sat down as well.
“Why? I don’t understand anything.”
You swallowed and looked down.
“I was suicidal before. And it just, I don’t know. I got triggered I guess.” You mumbled and shrugged.
Simon just narrowed his eyes. How could you be so calm about it?
“But what happened? What triggered it?”
You sighed as you let yourself down on your mattress.
“Don’twannatalkaboutit.”
Simon raised an eyebrow.
“What? Speak up soldier. C’mon now, you know you can talk to me.”
“Graves…”
Simon shot up.
“What did that fucker do?!”
You just sighed and curled up more.
“Nothing,I-“
Simon quickly got out of your room, leaving you speechless and scared. You were scared to be alone, and scared that Graves would say some shit and Ghost would believe them.
You just closed your eyes and sighed again, suddenly fee exhausted and tired.
It was so quick, so fast like it was a dream.
“What the fuck just happened..” You mumbled to yourself.
Soon enough, Simon came back. He knocked on your door and you mumbled for him to come in.
“Took care of it.”
Your heart broke a little after that. Not in a bad way, you might add.
“Thank you. I’m just exhausted, I guess. Never really thought I would ever do that again.”
Simon held your hand as you looked up at him. His eyes took you in and left you breathless in an instant. He attempted to say something, but didn’t. You smiled at him softly, laying down on the bed.
“I’m gonna go, yeah..”
He scratched the back of his neck, and contemplated for a moment to say anything else.
But he got up, leaving your room after looking you one last time.
It was probably for another day. You would talk with him another day.
#call of duty#call of dooty#cod mwf2#simon riley#simon riley angst#simon riley x reader#simon riley x you#ghost x you#simon ghost riley#simon riley fluff#cod mw x reader#cod modern warfare#request for riverbutghost
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Hiii!!! How about reader who’s very scared of dentists and she has a dentist appointment and is super scared and nervous the whole week, maybe with Fermin? I think I remember you said you wanted too write for him but if not then perhaps Cubarsi or arda?🥰🥰🥰
FEAR OF DENTISTS - FERMÍN LÓPEZ
Fermín helping you with your fear of dentists
Fermín López x fem! reader
︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿
The anticipation of having my wisdom teeth removed was almost unbearable. The thought of the procedure—the extraction, the numbness, the discomfort—filled me with a growing sense of dread.
I’d spent the week in a state of anxiety, imagining every possible scenario and worrying about how I would handle the pain and recovery.
Fermín noticed my increasing anxiety, though I tried to keep it to myself. It was a Sunday afternoon, and we were curled up on the couch together.
I had been unusually quiet, my mind racing as I stared blankly at the TV. Fermín turned to me, his eyes full of concern.
“You’ve been really on edge lately,” he said gently, brushing a strand of hair from my face. “What’s going on?”
I swallowed hard, trying to keep my composure, but the fear was overwhelming. “It’s… it’s my dentist appointment tomorrow. I can’t stop thinking about it. I’m so scared.”
Fermín’s eyes softened with understanding. “I get it. I had my wisdom teeth removed a few years ago, so I know how you’re feeling.”
I looked at him, surprised. “You did?”
“Yeah,” he nodded. “It was definitely not fun, but I got through it. And you will, too. Do you want me to tell you what to expect?”
I nodded, hoping his experience might help ease some of my fears.
“Well,” he began, his tone soothing and reassuring, “the process itself is usually pretty quick. They’ll numb the area, so you won’t feel anything during the extraction. You might hear some sounds, but that’s normal. Once it’s done, you’ll be in a bit of discomfort, but they’ll give you medication to help with the pain.”
His words were calming, but I still felt a flutter of anxiety. “And what about the recovery? How long did it take you to feel better?”
“It took a few days,” Fermín said, his voice gentle.
“The first day or two can be the most uncomfortable, but after that, it gets better pretty quickly. I remember eating soft foods, like mashed potatoes and yogurt, and keeping ice packs on my cheeks to help with the swelling.”
I took a deep breath, feeling a bit reassured by his description. “That doesn’t sound too bad, I guess. It helps to know that it’s something you’ve been through and survived.”
Fermín smiled warmly, squeezing my hand gently. “Absolutely. And I’ll be here with you through it all. I’ll help you with whatever you need—whether it’s picking up soft foods, changing ice packs, or just being there to distract you with bad movies.”
“Thank you. It means a lot.”
The next morning, Fermín drove me to the dentist’s office, his presence a steady comfort. He kept up a light conversation. His easy demeanor helped keep my mind off the impending procedure.
When they finally called my name, he gave me a reassuring smile and a gentle hug. “You’ve got this. Remember, it’s just a short procedure, and then we’ll be on the other side of it. I’ll be right here waiting for you.”
I nodded, feeling a bit more at ease as I walked into the room. The procedure itself was quick and uneventful, just as he had described.
When I woke up in the recovery room, I found him waiting with a concerned yet supportive smile.
“Hey, how are you feeling?” he asked softly, helping me settle into the car.
“A little groggy, but it wasn’t as bad as I thought,” I replied, leaning against him for support.
He helped me get settled at home, providing everything I needed—soft foods, ice packs, and the occasional funny movie to keep me entertained.
As the days went by, his care and companionship made the recovery process much easier.
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Hi! I was wondering if I could request Matt x black widow reader where they’re training together and she finally tells him where she learned to fight, but he’s surprised because she seemed like she didn’t know how to protect herself?
hi my love!
I got super carried away with this one and clearly I was in an angsty mood when I wrote it oops but it does have a nice ending I promise! thank you for the request! 🖤
warning: contains swearing, brief mentions of spiciness, mentions of violence, abuse, & implied sexual assault all in relation to the red room program (if any of these themes make you uncomfortable, please feel free to skip! you will not hurt my feelings, I promise!) word count: 3.9k
show me what you got.
Half of Fogwell’s was illuminated by the sunlight coming through the large floor to ceiling windows at the back of the gym, casting a golden glow over the worn equipment and faded walls. The other half that was furthest away from the sun’s steady rays was lit well enough that you could see a clear path to not trip over anything, so you didn’t bother turning on the lights. Matt never did anyway. Not only because they were of no use to him, but he had also mentioned that sometimes the buzz of electricity in a building could be overwhelming to his senses.
Matt had been adamant about teaching you self defense lately. You weren’t sure what happened that awoke this sudden need in him, but he had been bringing it up insistently for two weeks until you finally broke down and gave into him. He claimed it was purely because he wanted to know that you could defend yourself if something were to happen and he couldn’t get to you in time, but there was a feeling in the pit of your stomach that told you there was more to it. Saying no to Matthew Murdock was nearly impossible, and it wasn’t that you didn’t want to let him teach you. It made your heart swell with adoration that he genuinely just wanted to keep you as safe as possible. But there was something Matt didn’t know about your past that had you denying his argument…until he finally wore you down like he always did.
You leaned against the edge of the ring with your back to the door, humming along to the music that was currently playing through your headphones. Matt had told you he was running late for your first little session together, so you figured you had a little time to kill. Glancing around the old gym, you smiled to yourself as you tried to picture little Matty running around as his dad trained on the mat that was in front of you. The first time he had brought you here, he told you some of his fondest memories he had of his father, and it made you feel special that he felt comfortable sharing something so intimate with you. He spoke of him so proudly, and with so much love, it made you wish you’d had a chance to meet Jack, and that he’d had a chance to see the incredible man his son had grown up to be.
A hand grabbing onto your waist quickly broke you out of your trance, and you instinctively grabbed onto the person’s wrist, swiftly spinning around and twisting their arm behind their back as you grabbed onto their shoulder to lock them in a painful position. A familiar head of brown hair doubled over before you had your eyes widening in horror, and you immediately let go of Matt’s arm as you ripped the headphones out of your ears.
“Oh my god, Matt…I’m so sorry. I didn’t hear you come in, I had my-fuck, are you okay? I’m so sorry, baby.”
Matt straightened up as he rubbed at his shoulder, turning around to face you. His eyes were blown completely wide open as he stared in your direction, a look of pure surprise etched onto his face.
“Uh…yeah. Yeah, no I’m fine. I didn’t…didn’t mean to scare you.”
“You didn’t! I just…didn’t know it was you. I mean I don’t…I’m not sure who else I thought would be…I didn’t mean to, I’m sorry.”
Matt was still for a moment, tilting his head slightly to the left as his blank eyes remained fixated in your direction. His lips parted slightly, tongue coming out to quickly wet them while his brows pulled together slightly in the center of his forehead in curiosity.
“How…how did you do that?”
“Do what?”
“What you just did. How do you know how to do that?”
Fuck.
“I…I was…taught.”
“By?”
Please let this go, Matt.
“It…it was a long time ago. I’m out of practice anyway.”
“Not that much.”
The look on Matt’s face caused your anxiety to spike, sending your blood rushing through your heart at an unforgiving pace. He must have heard the uptick in your rhythm, because he immediately squinted his eyes.
“Why are you so nervous right now?”
“I’m not.”
“Why are you lying to me.”
Matt’s plump lips were settled in a tight, disapproving line. There was a hardness to his voice that had guilt flooding the pit of your stomach. You hated lying to Matt. It wasn’t that you wanted to, you were just absolutely terrified of losing him.
“You said you wanted to teach me, and you were so excited when I finally said yes…I didn’t wanna take that away from you. I’d much rather learn from you than who I did anyway.”
Letting out a deep sigh, you took a step forward towards him and placed your hands on Matt’s shoulders, gently massaging the one you’d caused pain to.
“Besides, you’ve been so busy lately, this is a chance for us to spend more time together. And you can teach me everything I don’t know.”
The soft smile that graced your lips immediately disappeared when you realized the translucent level of betrayal that covered Matt’s face hadn’t faltered.
“How am I supposed to do that when I don’t even know what you do know.”
The vexation you detected in his voice felt like a bullet ripping straight through the dense tissue of your heart. He had every right to be upset with you right now, you knew that deep down, but there was still an ache echoing in your rib cage.
“Matt-“
“What is it? What are you hiding?”
“I’m not-“
“Don’t give me that shit. You’re lying to me, right now. Don’t lie to my face like I can’t tell. I want the truth.”
“It’s not that simple.”
Matt let out a dry laugh, his face a twisted mixture of shock and disbelief as his full brows raised several inches upwards.
“Not that simple? Do you think telling you the truth about me was simple?”
“In comparison, yes.”
Matt looked as though you had physically slapped him across the face, and the sight made your stomach twist with regret. His face immediately hardened, and he squared his shoulders as he stared down in your direction.
“I want the truth. Now.”
“Matt-“
“Or we’re done.”
A quiet gasp slipped past your mouth at the conviction in his statement. He meant it.
“I won't be with a liar. Not again.”
There were traces of pain and treachery in the venom he tossed at you, and it had guilt seeping into the very marrow of your bones. You knew exactly what he was talking about; who he was talking about. A brief thought crossed your mind that he might be disgusted if he found out just how similar the two of you were, and the sins you shared.
He must have taken your silence as an answer, because he was angrily grabbing his gym bag off the nearby bench and stalking towards the door to get as far away from you as he could. Panic began to rise in your throat, and you didn’t know what the fuck to do.
You could let him go. Convince yourself it was for the best. That he was going to leave the second he found out what you were anyway, so might as well get it over with now. You could spend the rest of your life trying to erase his memory, fool yourself into believing you could find happiness after him, and die knowing the one person you had ever loved had walked away from you because being a coward was the least awful thing about you.
Or you could tell him the truth. You could try things his way; kneel at his altar and bind your hands in his, say a prayer of his name and beg for the same mercy and forgiveness he had given her. It was a cheap shot to dare a man of faith to not practice what he preached, but it was an even bigger gamble that he might let the Devil decide on his behalf instead.
“I was a widow.”
Matt instantly paused at the door, hand stilling over the handle for a moment. He slowly turned around to face you, a considerably softer expression on his features as he spoke quietly.
“You had a husband?”
Clicking your tongue against the inside of your cheek, you leaned back against the ring and crossed your arms over your chest.
“No, not that kind. I meant…I was a black widow, Matt.”
You had seen more shades of revelation flash across Matt’s face today than you ever had the entire time you had known him, and that made you nervous. He was not an easy person to shock. This man had been through the goddamn ringer, had friends that had powers and abilities, had his ex-girlfriend die in his arms twice because of some supernatural shit, and yet you were still able to surprise him. That wasn’t something to be proud of.
As he parted his lips to speak, you quickly cut him off and began to pace back and forth furiously.
“Look before you say anything, just…let me explain. I…I didn’t tell you…it wasn’t because I didn’t trust you. Okay, it had nothing to do with that. I just…I wasn’t sure how you would react-“
“How I would react?”
“I’m not done.”
“Y/N, I told you I was Daredevil. That’s a pretty big bombshell. You didn’t think that was the time to tell me this?”
“No, I didn’t-“
“Why?”
“Matthew I am trying to explain that, but I need you to shut the fuck up first.”
Matt clenched his jaw, cocking his head to the side slightly to crack his neck as he let a deep exhale out through his nose. Carelessly tossing his gym bag onto the floor with a thud, he motioned with his hand for you to continue before settling both of his hands on his hips in a stance of annoyance.
“I’m not like you, Matt. Okay? I’m not a hero. There are things…things that I did that I can never undo.”
“So you were a spy for a shitty government and did shitty things. You broke codes and laws. You think I don’t understand that? I may not commit espionage Y/N, but I break some of the very laws I took an oath to uphold nearly every night. You lied to me about something you knew I could’ve understood. I mean, it’s not like you killed someone.”
The carelessness of Matt’s words and the accusatory tone of his voice had you seething. He must have sensed your swift change in mood because the humorless smile on his lips quickly evaporated. You balled your hands up into tight fists to control the way they shook with rage, chest heaving slightly with jagged breaths as your voice dipped an octave lower.
“What is it you think widows do exactly, Matthew.”
Regret flashed in his eyes the moment he stumbled across his mistake, and the realization of your words settling in had his mouth hanging open in horror.
“Let me tell you exactly what we’re trained to do. It isn’t just lies and stealing. It’s also seduction, orchestrating crises, persuading wars, but most importantly, assassination.”
Anger boiled throughout your bloodstream as you spoke. You weren’t sure if you were more pissed at Matt for being an insensitive asshole, or about the life that was taken away from you, but all you could see was red. You’d never gotten a chance to be angry about it before, and now you couldn’t hold back the fire that burnt through you.
“You think losing your father was hard? I was taken from my family. I don’t even know who the hell they are. I’ll never know if they even wanted me, or if they willingly gave me up. I’ll never know their names. I’ll never know if they’re even still alive. I will never know anything about them. You think Stick was rough on you? I grew up in the Red Room, Matt. What you had was a fucking daydream compared to the nightmare I lived.”
“Y/N-“
“You wanna know how many girls survive the training program? One in twenty. I was the lucky one out of the twenty.”
Matt’s face immediately fell at your words, letting his head hang in shame as he swallowed thickly.
“Was your first time nice, Matt? Was it romantic and with someone you loved? Someone you trusted?”
Matt clenched his jaw tightly, squeezing his eyes shut as his hands trembled slightly at his sides.
“Y/N-“
“I’ll spare you the details of mine. But I can assure you it was not nice. It was part of my training, and there was no love or trust being done to my body. It was being used as a demonstration in seduction to complete a mission.”
A tiny piece of you knew this wasn’t fair. You shouldn’t be trying to invalidate Matt’s trauma with your own. But he wanted the truth, so you were giving him all of it.
“I can’t tell you how many times my body was violated, inside and out. And do you wanna know what I got for being the lucky one to graduate the program? Torn open and ripped apart. I didn’t just have my life ripped away from me, I had my ability to create life ripped away from me too. You were broken down and molded into a hero by your city. I was broken down and molded into a villain by mine. You made a choice to be the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen. I never got that choice, Matt. I never got a choice until the Red Room finally fucking fell, and then I ran. I ran as far away as I fucking could.”
You thought the haze of madness was what had consumed your vision, but as it finally became clear when you blinked, you realized your face was streaked in tears. Matt’s shoulders shook with remorse, quiet sobs and sniffles leaving him as you noticed the tracks of melancholia on his own face. All of that pent up rage and resentment…he didn’t deserve it. He didn’t deserve any of it. He deserved better.
“I have been trying…so hard to forget that part of my life…to make up for the things I’ve done. I didn’t…I didn’t want to keep it from you. I didn’t want to lie to you. I just…I was so scared…I was terrified to lose you because you are the one good thing I have ever had…I didn’t want you to hate me-”
“Hate you?”
Matt’s voice was just as broken as his face, and it only twisted the knife further. In a few short strides he was in front of you, frantically shaking his head in disbelief.
“How could I ever hate you?”
“Because I am everything you stand against, Matt.”
“That’s not true.”
“I’ve killed-“
“That wasn’t your choice. None of that was ever your choice. How could I ever hold something against you that was forced on you?”
You wanted to believe him. You wanted to believe that he still wanted you. But that tiny little voice in the back of your head kept screaming that this is where he would leave you.
“Y/N-“
Matt brought his hands up to gently cradle your face, a look of pure agony covering his features as his sweet honey eyes dripped with sorrow.
“You were a little girl taken from her home, abused and brainwashed, and used against your will by evil people. That does not make you evil. I know you never wanted to do any of those things they made you do. I can feel how much it hurts you, sweetheart. I do not hold any of that against you, I swear.”
“I don’t know if I can ever forgive myself, Matt.”
“Oh, honey.”
Matt immediately pulled you into him, wrapping his arms protectively around your body as he held you as close as physically possible. He gently brushed his fingers through your hair, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead while you sobbed into his chest.
“Shh, it’s alright. It’s okay, my love. I know it hurts. I know that guilt you feel. You can make peace with it. I can’t promise you that it will be easy. There are some days…that are going to be a lot harder than others, and you’re going to feel…like you don’t deserve that peace or forgiveness at all. But you do. And I will be there with you, every step of the way.”
You gripped onto Matt tightly like he was a lifeline keeping you afloat in the middle of a violent sea storm. He was the first person that had made you feel safe since you’d moved to New York. Finding out who he really was only made you feel safer. He was the scary thing in the dark that all the real monsters feared, and he was yours.
“Whoever you were before…whatever you did, it doesn’t matter. I only care about who you are now. I love who you are now.”
“I love you, Matt. I love you so much.”
Love used to be a four letter word to you. An emotion you’d never felt, but feigned for personal gain. A genre of literature, film, and music. A holiday created by corporations for profit. But the second you met him, that all changed.
Love was Matthew Murdock. It was his dazzling smile coupled with charming dimples that made your knees weak. It was the warmth of his hand on your lower back as he guided you to the side of the sidewalk furthest from the street. It was the way he always smiled when he said your name, and how it rolled off of his tongue almost in a beckoning manner. It was his jacket over your shoulders when you’d insisted it wasn’t ‘that cold’. It was the trust in sharing his troubled past, his deepest fears, his haunting insecurities, and his greatest sins.
It was the first time he touched your body. It was the gentleness and undivided attention while he made love to you as you shared your first intimate moment together. It was the first time your body had ever been shown love and it took everything in you not to break down at how softly he caressed you and how patient he was with you. It was the space he took up in your heart and the home he made within you.
It was the verity in his voice when he whispered those three words into your ear for the first time, and the way he made you feel worthy of them.
“I love you, sweetheart. I’m not going anywhere. I promise. I’m not leaving you.”
“Please don’t tell Karen and Foggy. I…I don’t want them to know.”
A part of you knew they would understand. They were your chosen family as much as Matt was. But telling Matt the truth was difficult enough. You weren’t sure you could do it again. You didn’t want to risk your past life ruining your new one.
“I won’t. We can keep this between us.”
“I…I don’t think-“
“It’s okay, you don’t have to explain yourself. I understand.”
Letting out a deep breath, your shoulders suddenly felt a lot lighter, and that weight that had been heavy on your chest was finally gone. For the first time in years you felt like you could actually breathe.
“Thank you.”
Matt pulled back slightly, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear as he gazed down at you lovingly.
“For what, honey?”
“Still loving me.”
“You didn’t stop loving me.”
“Matt-“
“I’m not always a hero, sweetheart. I don’t always go out every night to protect people. As much as I hate to admit it out loud, sometimes I enjoy beating the shit out of people that deserve it. I’ve been driven to that edge of wanting to take someone’s life before. There’s not always purity in what I do.”
“But there’s heart, and good intentions.”
“Which is exactly what you have too.”
Matt leaned in to bump your nose with his, tracing the underside of your jaw slowly with his index finger.
“Well, if the Devil said it, it must be true.”
The tension in Matt’s shoulders seemed to evaporate as a smirk tugged at the corner of your mouth, and your lips only split further into a grin as his mouth mirrored yours. There was a wicked glint dancing around in his eyes, and his tongue glided along his bottom lip slowly as he cocked his head to the side.
“So…did you all have like…a uniform or something?”
Puzzlement furrowed between your brows at Matt’s question as you tried to figure out where he was going with this.
“Like…a suit?”
“Yeah.”
“Yeah, why?”
Matt couldn’t contain the suggestive smirk that took over his entire mouth, arching one of his brows playfully as he jutted his chin in your direction.
“You still have it?”
Your mouth immediately fell open, pulling back to deliver a soft punch directly into Matt’s chest as you stared at him incredulously.
“Matthew Murdock!”
“What?”
“You can’t even see!”
“But I can feel.”
Matt wiggled his eyebrows suggestively, moving his hands down your waist slowly to grab at your hips while sinking his teeth into his bottom lip seductively.
“You are unbelievable. Everything I just told you…and that’s where your head is at.”
“Both of them, actually.”
“You are the worst Catholic I have ever met, you know that?”
“Why do you think my confessions take so long?”
Pursing your lips, you swatted at Matt’s chest again, pushing him away as you backed up to rest against the ring. You tried to contain your grin as he snickered, prowling towards you slowly with mischievous intent.
“Well?”
“I might have kept it, just in case.”
You could see Matt’s excitement clearly in his eyes, but he remained in his spot just a few inches in front of you as a timid smile tugged at his mouth.
“You don’t actually have to wear it if you don’t want to. If it’s…too much for you. I know you might have certain feelings associated with it.”
“Not really. I repurposed it and made it my own when I came here. It doesn’t belong to them anymore. It’s mine.”
Matt’s lips parted slightly, and you could see the flush of red blooming on his cheeks and coating the tops of his ears. His excitement was starting to be evident in other places, and you couldn’t help but smirk as he stepped in closer.
“You know, I’ve heard black widows are extremely dangerous.”
“Get in the ring and I’ll show you.”
Matt’s face lit up like a goddamn Christmas tree as he placed both of his palms on the mat on either side of you to cage you in with his body.
“You gonna take it easy on me?”
“Oh I think you can handle it, Daredevil. I thought they called you the man without fear? You scared, baby?”
Matt’s eyes were wild with hunger, a ravenous grin stretching his lips open to show off his gleaming teeth as he leaned in to let his warm breath fan over your lips.
“Show me what you got, sweetheart.”
#matt murdock#matt murdock x you#matt murdock x y/n#matt murdock x reader#matt murdock x female reader#matt murdock x fem!reader#matt murdock x f!reader#matt murdock x black widow!reader#matt murdock fic#matt murdock request#daredevil#daredevil fic#daredevil request
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By Your Side Feet?
Nanami x GN! Reader
Summary: You're afraid of the dentist and your dutiful boyfriend finds a way to help
Words: 1387
Warnings: None! Just fluff, Nanami being the perfect sweetie he is
A/N: There's no specified gender, pronouns, race etc. The only thing specified is the fear of the dentist and how (I personally) feel about it, that's it! Just something super quick. I got inspired by @teddybeartoji (seriously go chek them out!! I love their fics) Toji dentist fic, made me think about how Nanami would look after you which I hope to remember next time I have to go to the dentist!
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“It’s still bothering you, isn’t it” came Kento’s warm voice. Tinged with concern and almost perceptible disapproval. You, however, were nervously smiling up at him, acting as if you hadn’t just been caught massaging your jaw, “no, no it stopped, don’t worry.” Of course, you both new you were lying, something the two of you agreed to never do with one another and had stuck to over the course of your 2 year relationship. So it would be reasonable for Nanami to be annoyed, angry, betrayed feeling, anything like that. However, you’re seemingly infinitely patient boyfriend, held nothing but worry in his eyes as he peered down at you. Letting out a soft sigh, he sat down beside you on the couch of your shared home, hand coming up to cup your cheek, “You need to go to the dentist my love, before it gets any worse.” The deep frown that settled across your lips as you shrunk away from his kind but determined gaze had Kento feeling bad, he knew you disliked the dentist, even he wasn’t a fan, but he also knew you were in agony. It had been 2 weeks now, chewing food on the other side, making pained expressions and tentatively rubbing at your jaw when you thought he wasn’t looking and worst of all was the way you had teared up as you brushed your teeth.
The nervous shake of your head as you spoke only made him frown more, “It’s fine, Ken, it’ll sort itself out.” “Love, please, the pain isn’t worth it to avoid the dentist, I’ll come with you if that’d help at all?” He coaxed gently, the other hand reaching out and gently curling around your wrist to pull you into him. As his fingers settled against your pulse, he realised your heart was racing, and now he had a matching frown, “You’re that afraid?” Tears were quick to flood your lash line as you ducked your head, a feeling of shame swirling in your gut as you whispered, “Yeah.” Nanami wrapped his arms around you, pulling you into his chest as he rested his chin atop your head with a soft sigh.
He held you for a little while, waiting until you relaxed completely into him before speaking again, “Can you tell me why? Perhaps I can find some solutions for you, to make it easier.” With a deep sigh of resignation you tugged his hand into your lap, playing with his fingers to as you began to explain, “I never really worry about the pain, it’s never that bad, but the sensation of everything and how loud it all is just makes me so sick and always gives me a headache. Plus you can’t really move or anything, everything happens so fast and I never have a chance to prepare myself and even if you try to get them to stop they don’t always, just saying to hold on a bit longer. Just all of that is so overwhelming and makes me panic. Feels like I’m being tortured and can’t even move to get away. I know it’s stupid, but the fear and panic once it starts is just so all-consuming.” As you spoke, Kento listened intently, free hand gently rubbing along your back.
“First of all, it’s not stupid. Secondly, I had no idea it felt that way for you, for me its just, uncomfortable, but for you it sounds awful love, I’m so sorry.” He pressed a sot kiss to your temple, hoping to bring a bit more comfort. “I can come with you and we can ask about booking a longer appointment that way they can take their time. I can make sure they stop if you need a break and we can ask them to talk you through things so it’s not so fast. How does that sound?” Chewing nervously on your lip as you contemplated if that would actually help or not, eyes flickering up to meet his and relaxing a little again, “That could help.”
You’d spent the next hour talking about ways to make the whole thing easier on you, with the goal to make it tolerable more so than to fix it all. After that, Nanami had made an appointment for the following day and taking the day off work so that he could be with you the whole time as well as look after you afterwards. Despite all the preparation and talking, you were now sat in the dentist office, leg bouncing as you picked at your nails, mind reeling as the panicky feeling slowly climbed. Kento had signed you in and had just sat down beside you, hand coming to pry yours apart and interlock your fingers. “Breathe for me dear, deep breath in and hold, then out slowly, ready?” and he did as he asked of you, encouraging you to copy which you did. Between his calm hazel eyes and large warm hand encompassing yours, you felt that panic begin to subside, easing into a more manageable bubble of anxiety instead. That was until your name was called and it all came rushing back in an instant.
Nanami held your hand as you walked into the room, only letting go once you’d settled into the waiting dentists chair. He checked with the dentist before moving a chair over to sit by your feet, hand coming to rest on your ankle as a physical reminder he was there. The appointment took a long time, however every time you started to get jittery, Kento’s hands were massaging along your ankles and calves, the occasional softly spoken “You’re doing so well love” a reminder you weren’t alone. A reminder you weren’t trapped, that you could make it through. When you motioned for breaks the dentist listened after the first time where he had hesitated and was met with the clearing of Nanami’s throat and cold, stern look. The image would stay with you forever of you’re doting boyfriend, staring down your dentist and you couldn't help the small smile that tugged at your lips in response.
The second you were out of the chair, Nanami was pulling you in to his arms, pressing a kiss to the top of your head, “You did great, I’m so proud of you love, I love you.” And if the dentist and assistant were looking at you both funny, neither of you cared enough to notice, no, instead you were tucking yourself into him with a muffled “thankyou, I love you so much Kento, thankyou.” You walked back out, hand in hand, to pay for the appointment before leaving and climbing into the car. “Now, as promised, lets get that drink you love so much. We’ll order your favorite for dinner rather than lunch seeing as you’ll be numb for a little while” He mused, ruffling your hair as he pulled out of the clinic parking lot. “Hey, Ken, thankyou, really. You didn’t make me feel silly or childish, it sucked but it wasn’t as bad as it usually is so, thankyou.” He smiled, eyes flickering over to you before taking your hand in his, entwining your fingers as he brought them up to kiss the back of your hand. “Of course, I love you, I’ll never treat your fears as silly or childish. I’m just glad I helped even a little bit.”
The rest of the day was spent doing things you loved while Kento babied you. Curled up in Kento’s arms on the couch with a comfort movie playing was a great way to spend your afternoon, it certainly helped the memory of the dentist fade quickly. So, as you curled up together in bed for the night, face peppered in kisses from Kento that had you giggling, you couldn’t help but feel nothing but love. Love for Kento Nanami, a man who would drop everything to make you feel better, who never once would belittle your fears, who thought you were simply the most beautiful human being ever and truly felt happy just to be in your presence. The love held for one another truly shone in times like this, where he knew everything that made you happy and comfy and where you felt safe and stronger with him by your side, or in this case, your feet.
#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x you#sfw#nanami kento#nanami x reader#jjk nanami#jjk kento#kento x reader#kento x y/n#fluff
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Critic of Stage in Playful Land - The Worst Event in Twisted Wonderland
I'm not gonna lie, I had high hopes for this event. The cards were gorgeous, I loved the new outfits, and we even got new characters! I'm quite a huge fan of the gothic circus aesthetic, so I was even more hyped for what's to come. Of course the stakes would be high for something like this, but unfortunately...the execution of this event has completely brought it down.
This is gonna be a very long and angry critic, so beware! I might be mean too!
The translation screenshots provided are from Ekala on YouTube. TW: Insensitive portrayal of human trafficking
The first part of the event felt SUPER stretched out. I understand, the main cast may have been overwhelmed with homework and losing the basketball match against NRC. But I also feel like they could have summarized this quicker? Plus, Fellow Honest also talks A LOT. I know it was supposed to be extended flattery to the point where it became suspicious, but it was taking so long to get to the main point that I quickly became bored.
The character's reasons for going were also very strange...but let's focus on the Octavinelle twins for a second. Floyd and Jade wanted to visit the amusement park specifically because it seemed suspicious. The twins are seen as a very shady duo, and having conflict with an even shadier duo (Fellow Honest and Gidel) is bound to be something that would be super interesting to watch.
Similarly as to how Idia played a crucial part in the Masquerade event, I thought they would have a larger role in this story, and I was disappointed when they just frolicked around the amusement park. They're not the type to just walk right into a dangerous territory without a plan/strategy, and it felt really weird seeing that happen. With them doing no preparations for this situation whatsoever, it feels like a waste to even state that detail in the first place. Speaking of that...I had heard some other fan theories on the role Ortho would play in this event. Some speculated that he would be representing the puppet in this event, as he isn't human. But then again, none of that ends up happening in the event because there was no thought as to how these characters would be used. My friend made an interesting point about the character choice in this event. They speculated it was just the company gathering up characters that haven't been in many events before book 7 ended, and I honestly wouldn't be surprised if this was the case.
When the main cast was exploring the park, it was just filler content. Nothing interesting happened, at all. They explored the park that was filled with references from the Pinocchio movie. Now if this was any other Disney film, I would be like "Yeah alright, that's from the movie. That's cool". But if you know what happens in the movie, then it might be a different story. I was deadass filled with dread when they put the references in, and I was so uncomfortable. Especially during this scene:
Also this was uncomfortable to see. Like okay...I didn't need to know that.
Anyone who watched the Pinocchio movie must have known that something bad was bound to happen (most likely some form of human trafficking). So when Fellow Honest's intentions for selling guests as wooden dolls was finally revealed, the entire story went from 0 to 100 real quick. And not in a good way. I know the previous filler was supposed to put us in their shoes, and how we as the viewer could also get distracted from the carnival's attractions. However, there should have been a better way to transition these two contrasting moods of the story. Plus, I can't help but feel like this is an unnecessarily cruel twist compared to the original movie. When it comes to more darker/sensitive topics such as human trafficking, there should be some sort of caution as to how they portray these kinds of things. I felt like this was solely added for shock value to make up for the slow pacing in the first parts of the event, and I can't help but feel really uncomfortable about this. I also REALLY don't like the possible implications of this line:
The insensitivity of the topic of human trafficking is further fueled by how the chase is played out. They needed a reason for characters to be kidnapped one by one, and I know that's usually how these types of events play out. But considering the severity of their situation, I feel very weird about it. Also, the characters are unusually calm about being sold as a literal slave? And the topic is just not dealt with seriously at all.
Important Detail: The Playful Land theme park functions as a ship, which sails away from land as soon enough guests are lured into the park. This is literally a human trafficking ship, there's no sugarcoating this.
Another part I'm upset about is how Kalim dealt with the entire situation. I'm unfortunately used to Twisted Wonderland dumbing down his character for cheap laughs but this has really gone off the rails. Ace gave him a clear reality check. They were at risk of being sold as dolls to whatever rich freak paid money for them. It was clear that Fellow Honest wouldn't converse on the subject over a fancy dinner. Honestly...I need you guys to read this for yourself.
So when Ortho came back, why in the world did Ace apologize to Kalim? Sure, what he said was harsh but it was completely true! There was a real threat to these characters and it wasn't being taken seriously.
For some reason, every time there's a chance for Kalim to develop, all of that is just completely reversed. Even if this was an issue before the event was released, I also feel like the writers forgot one very important thing...
Kalim has literally been kidnapped before! SEVERAL TIMES TOO!
He was targeted several times because he's from a rich family, they were planning to do malicious things to him for the sake of MONEY. Literally, just like Fellow Honest! He should know better than anyone else how horrifying it is to be taken away from the ones you love, and having no idea what will happen to you. But noooo instead he went full on Steven Universe on Fellow Honest! I'm not even taking the excuse that he's desensitized to it because he was putting the lives of his classmates at risk by giving this human trafficker a fucking chance. While he's not the smartest in the group, his character IS compassionate. How did he give more compassion towards this stranger he met a day ago instead of his own classmates?! How did they botch his character this badly?!
Lastly, when Fellow Honest's reasoning is stated in the story...I really have no words. He engaged in human trafficking, because his former teachers told him that he wasn't a good mage? ...I'm sorry? What the fuck kinda reasoning is that?!
He's literally committing a random act of malice because of his own personal issues. I can't even say that he was merely projecting his hatred onto students alone, as there were other guests attending the park too! I don't know how old they are, or if they're even in school anymore, so these are literally just random victims to me! It looks like the writers attempted to add a tragic backstory for this character in order to get the audience to have some sort of sympathy for him, but this just makes him look fucking stupid.
During this event, he talks about school being worthless and about how he and Gidel had a hard time surviving because they didn't get an education. Like...he chose to drop out of school. Of course that would happen! What was he expecting?
This event made an attempt to go into class dynamics and it's just...oh my god. Let's do a character comparison for a second. Ruggie grew up in a poor area, but because of that he was always on that grindset. Instead of bitching about how educated people are entitled and snobby, he takes advantage of every opportunity around him. And this includes the education at Night Raven College! He even takes financial advantage of others if necessary! He doesn't mind working for others as long as he can get something out of it.
Now let's talk about Fellow Honest's unique magic. I'm not gonna lie, I do think that concept is pretty cool! However, let's take a look at how it's implemented in the event. Now this is where I get critical of this. Having an increased amount of optimism doesn't mean being dumbed down. I'm still confused on how none of the characters were at least a little bit skeptical when walking through the park. There were red flags all across the park, free food, surprise gifts, a whole ass outfit for free, and a freaking 10 minute roller coaster! It was clearly too good to be true, so I can't understand how nobody among the main cast doubted it even for a second?
Also the reasoning why a magic-sensitive creature like Lilia didn't sense his magic before is so bullshit. I'm sorry, they just needed a reason for him to not notice this in order to make this event work.
And then when the cast started talking about how great school was for them, and even offering him admission to Night Raven College... Sorry just a moment, I just need to...
He is a literal human trafficker, and they decided to sympathize with him because of his bad school past?! WHAT???
I'm not even taking the excuse that the main cast are based off villains. HOW CAN YOU JUSTIFY THAT AT ALL?!?!?! HOW???
We don't know how many people he has done this to. It's clear that this isn't the first time this amusement park has hosted customers. If this was merely his first attempt by means of survival then it might have been a different story, but he's experienced at this. There's a good chance that he has turned people into dolls before.
And then after a super prolonged chase scene and even more battles, we get to Kalim going full-on Steven Universe on Fellow Honest. Then his employer deducts his pay because of the damages in the park...and he finally had enough. He frees everyone, asks them to destroy the park, and now he's a good guy and he's gonna open a school!
...
Now I'm confused about this for a couple of reasons. So first of all, how did his opinion of schools completely do a complete 180 after talking with them for a few moments??? Change in a character doesn't occur this quickly, and we've seen this be the case with multiple characters in this game. Even if this was meant to be rushed for the sake of this being an event story, not even Rollo had a change in opinions after his event! So what was up with this?
The second reason is that Jack specifically stated in this event that his brother can't use magic but is still attending school. Magicless people DO get educated, and there's many pathways for them to choose from.
They aren't barren from society like Fellow Honest thinks they are. Take a look at the people in Epel's hometown and in Fleur city, they're pretty happy! I don't think the concept of schools for lower magic users/non-magic users is as revolutionary as they're making it out to be, and I feel like this is a super last-minute decision on the writers behalf.
Another thing is that...
Fellow Honest has NO REMORSE AT ALL for what he did.
He wanted to quit because he just didn't wanna work for the higher-ups anymore, not because he actually realized what he was doing was fucked up! Yeah sure, he might be focused on his new goal to open up a school. But is he just gonna ignore the fact that he fucking SOLD PEOPLE AS DOLLS? HUH? How am I supposed to wish him well on his newfound journey when this entire thing is just left unaddressed!
I'm also confused about another thing. Fellow Honest asked the cast to destroy the amusement park after he freed them, promising to turn the park boat around to Sage Island if they did so. This caused the boat to sink, and Ortho had to push the entire park back to shore.
They were able to get back to shore before any serious damage was done, so can anyone tell me why Fellow Honest and Gidel decided to ride off into the sunset WITH the park? It's literally sinking as they speak! So...huh? Where will they even sail to? It's pretty hard to not notice a huge ass amusement park sinking like this in the middle of the Sage Island, especially when it's right beside the port! What is going on?!
Who the hell even wrote this? I can't with this event man...
I know the lesson of this event is to realize the importance of going to school and being a good kid like in the movie. However...let's step back for a bit. The target audience for Twisted Wonderland is young adults and teenagers, and the fanbase DOES consist of these people. I don't think they need reminding of why education is a privilege...? Pinocchio was specifically made to scare little kids, so it just does not translate well to their target audience AT ALL. While I do love Twisted Wonderland, I really do feel like this is their worst event yet. I hate how almost all the characters were dumbed down to make this story work, and I don't care if it was because of Fellow Honest's unique magic. When it comes to sensitive topics, Twisted Wonderland is usually good at portraying them appropriately. So I really have no idea what happened with this event.
I think the company saw the positive reception with Rollo Flamme, and decided that this type of new character was something to be implemented yearly. Surprisingly, Fellow Honest and Gideon seem to have a large fanbase in Japan...so they probably took the popularity of these characters as their next material to work with. This could have worked out wonderfully if they were to treat this like its own story rather than a remake of the movie, but unfortunately that's not the path they decided to go with.
I have never felt this way about any other event, and the urge to write this critic was STRONG. I have no idea whether Yana wrote this, or if another employee just decided to pull some last-minute shit with this entire event. Regardless, I'm praying to god that this is merely a one-time occurrence and that the next event will be better. I think for the sake of my sanity, I need to pretend this event doesn't exist.
Thank you for reading my thoughts on this.
#twisted wonderland#stage in playful land#twst#twst wonderland#twst event#playful land event#I was really in denial at first but...#I was trying to give them the benefit of the doubt for almost the entirety of this event#PLEASE tell me i'm not the only one who's thinking this#when the shock value from this event worn off#I was just like...what did I just watch?#when you step back and look at it...it's really not good#there were more points I would have added in this post but it was already super long and I was really close to the image limit!#thank you for reading#I would love to hear what you guys think of the event
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💄 🍄 🎈 WONDER
💋 and ❗️(if it’s not too spoilers) Runo!!
🎸 🚨 Bartenn
💔 🌹 Machwell
🥩🍒🍎 Imogen <3
🪓 🍷 Kennedy !!
HOPE I DONT OVERWHELM YOU I KNOW THIS IS A LOT HAHA. I’ve been thinking abt these guys a lot (as always)! :3
JUMPS UP AND DOWN WITH YOU .hiiiii <3 i got really busy with hw so i wanted to wait until i had a moment i could sit down and really dig into these >;3ccc
i will always take an opportunity to talk about Wonder
💄 - What does your oc think of their face? Do they have a positive or negative opinion? Do they wear makeup? Do they have a skincare routine? What traits do they like most about their face?
Wonder has such a contentious relationship with its entire body; its face is no exception. It knows objectively a lot of people find it attractive, and it pays attention to its skin and makeup (usually focusing on its eyes) a lot. It'll stare at itself in the mirror and go yeah i know i'm hot shit. but also i don't think this body belongs to me and the only way I find that semblance of freedom and control is putting metal into it. it really wants more piercings, which is why in AUs i often give it the nose ring, bite piercings, eyebrows, etc- but in canon, it was advised by its team that getting more piercings would make it "harder to look at". they were appalled when Wonder showed up one day with the lip and bridge, but it was too late! being "hard to look at" is a phrase Wonder has not ever let go of.
(I think it makes them look super hot but whatever what do i know)
🍄 - Does your character like being in nature or do they prefer the indoors? Do they have any outdoor hobbies like camping or fishing? If they prefer the indoors, why?
Indoors all the way, Wonder dislikes the unpredictable nature of what makes the outdoors so great :( its house is extremely sterile and plain and empty because Too Many Things make it stressed out, and well! the outdoors is full of things. Its warming up a little bit to some things, Marya takes it down to the beach and it sits all bundled up in towels and a huge hat and sunglasses on a reclining chair while Marya wanders the shore and swims.
🎈 - What does your character do at parties? Are they a wallflower or a party animal? Do they go with friends or alone?
Wonder is still a fan of going to parties, its where it meets most of the people its in cahoots with, but things are a little different since its mental break. As I stated about disliking Lots Of Things, well parties are full of things, and very loud and very messy, so Wonder usually has to be in some state of mind to handle parties. It used to be a lot more rambunctious but the break caused the difficulties with busy locations and lots of socializing - but it still goes. Wonder doesn't really care if its uncomfortable.
runo love of my life
💋 - Is your oc a good kisser? Have they kissed anyone before? Do they even enjoy kissing? What was their first kiss like in comparison to their most recent?
This is such a cute question.....yes he's a perfectly fine kisser! he's just some straight man....he likes it, he likes kissing his wife......he just never knows when it's a good time, so sometimes he misses the mark or just waits for Peony to tell him "yes this is a good and normal time"
his first kiss was when he was first living away from his mom's house in a group home, definitely a little too rushed but there was a pretty girl his age and he was delirious on freedom
❗️(exclamation point) - What was the scariest moment of your character’s life? Does it still affect them?
OKAY WELL. okay the obvious answer feels like when he realized he might lose his younger brother forever (and he did) but there were a lot of other emotions happening there- grief, guilt, confusion, stress.....
the second scariest moment of just Pure Fear wassss probably when he found out Peony was gonna have their first daughter. he'd grown up his whole life with his mom beating into his head that having him was the worst mistake of her life, and that his dad was even moreso; Sunny was tentatively talked about before she was conceived, both Runo and Peony were like "yes this is something that would be cool" but when it Actually Happened he was terrified that he completely fucked everything up, and this was it, the end, that he was doomed to repeat his parents' mistake and Peony had been lying to him the whole time and she actually didn't want this at all- thats it! the relationship is over! and its all his fault!!!
obviously that was not what happened and Peony was extremely excited!! once the blind terror passed Runo was also a weepy excited mess, bc yess this is something that would be cool <3
bartenn questions from the bartenn enjoyer
🎸- What’s your character’s music taste like? Do they have one or two artists they play on repeat or do they have a varied and eclectic collection of music? Do they like mainstream artists or prefer underground musicians? What genres do they enjoy?
i mean you knowwww this guy is a classic rock dad YOU KNOWWWW IT I MEAN CAN HE BE ANYTHING ELSE!!!!!! you know he's got the most varied and crazy collection of old rock bands and his gas station exclusively plays oldie and if he hears a tiktok song from Harlie's phone, he keels over
🚨 - What’s your character’s relationship with the law? Have they ever been arrested? What for? What are their opinions on law enforcement?
he's never been arrested, despite his many crimes such as Starting A Time Loop. he's gonna be some big trouble with the Fold when he dies but i think they can forgive him....i mean just look at his scruffy little face he didn't mean it.....
he doesn't like police officers he doesn't give them free coffee when they ask
machwell machwell MACHWELL
💔- Who has your character hurt most? Physically or emotionally? How did it feel? Do they regret it?
absolutely Runo ABSOLUTELY absolutely runo absolutely Runo....his baby......Runo was so betrayed by him, Machwell's non-existence in his life was not a shadow out of the corner of his eye like it was for Goat- for Runo it was this big gaping hole, never able to be filled and always something Runo was blamed for.
Machwell regrets a lot- the leaving Runo guilt is humongous- which is why he's working very hard to completely forget about Runo so it doesn't hurt him anymore! yay! coping mechanism that's slowly killing his cognitive abilities!
🌹 - What does your oc find attractive in other people? Are these traits found in their friends and/or romantic partners?
blue hair and round little ears
personality wise he likes people who are very self-assured and assertive, strong people who can nudge him around, but not too much or else you've got a Francine who overhandled him to the point of regressing; he needs someone who is confident in themselves but also confident in Machwell, who'll nudge him around but in a way that's pushing him to stand up, instead of making him dependant on them again
imogen you have no IDEA i have wanted to talk about imogen 4 so long....underrated baby girl.....she is so important to me
🥩 - Does your oc have any coping mechanisms? Healthy or unhealthy?
the most major one that comes to mind is comic spoilers, or at least its something i'd like people to notice her doing and go "ohhh..."
🍒 - Does your character have a best friend? How long have they known each other? What do they like most about each other? How did they meet?
oh!! claps my hands!! no! no, Imogen doesn't have a best friend, she doesn't have a lot of friends, really! Imogen has always been pretty isolated by her peers- not because of anyone's choice, but literally, her peers don't like her. she's weird to them. there's been some light friends here and there, but after an event that happened when she was about 8, she realized her classmates genuinely didn't like her and felt she was too uncanny to be around :(
If Imogen were asked who her friends were, she'd say well, her dads! and her dad's friends- ooo! and her aunts and uncle!! and her grandparents!! and her dog, Bunny!! she has lots of friends!! she's friends with the grocer who has known her since she was small, and she's "friends" with plenty of retail workers around town who watched her grow up and are kind to her. she's friends with some of the older neighbors, and she's friends with....uh...her dads? oh she said that already
she hopes when she goes to college that she'll meet others who are more accepting! she's really really hoping for friends THAT ARE HER AGE....and she'll get some, although i don't think it happens in the comic. she ends up meeting Vega, and well. Vega is VERY used to strange uncanny people, so they're already starting off on the right foot!
🍎 - Does your oc go to school or take classes? Did they go to college? What was/is their favorite subject? Did/do they get good grades? Did/do they enjoy school?
Imogen LOVES school, her favorite subject is earth science and her least favorite is language. it just bores her. she loves learning about the planet and about cool rocks and plants and SPACE!!! she got her dad Caius's love for learning, having grown up on their books and lessons. she doesn't love it AS much, but in general, she doesn't mind school itself. what she does mind is the previously mentioned isolation, and how difficult it is to fit in, no matter how many shapes she tries.
kennedy
i like them.
🪓 - Does your oc have survival skills? Have they ever had to use them? What would they do in an apocalypse? Could they survive?
Kennedy doesn't look the part, but they do have some decent survival skills. they grew up out of their house quickly, so they had to learn early on how to couch-surf and feed themselves. for urban survival skills, they've got it covered!
would they survive dropped in the middle of the woods?? maybe for a little bit, purely because i think they'd be so scared they would go into some kind of override where suddenly they don't care about being covered in dirt and eating worms. but the instant they find civilization they're rolling over and crying bc their hair is sooo greasyyy
in an apocalypse i think they'd be awesome haahaha twirls my hair. kennedy knows how to fight and use blunt weapons so yeah i think they could get down to business. i think they'd be awesome haha
(the last question discusses alcohol!)
🍷 - Does your oc drink? What kind of alcohol do they enjoy? What are their drinking habits? What kind of drunk are they?
yess....maybe too much.......they drink white claws. white paws whatever. they love fruity shitty little drinks, but also they'll drink almost anything if you make it look pretty enough. they usually drink socially, and they're pretty used to it (a tolerance-built heavyweight) but sometimes they're just miserable for a variety of reasons, and this is their Not Great Coping Mechanism. it's not great because Leah knows if she finds them black-out that they've been drinking a lot. luckily this doesn't happen too often, but even once or twice is too many times.
as for what kind of drunk they are, the weepy clingy touchy annoying one. drunk Kennedy is a lot happier and chattier and it takes a lot more to make them angry at people! yyyayyy....?
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I have a request! Kinda loosely based on a experience I dealt with. Reader is super shy and deals with social anxiety. She is invited to a party by her friend and reader is trying her best to just go with the flow, relax. She notices eddie is there, who she’s been crushing on for some time and he sees her having a slight panic attack when football players start to tease her. Eddie steps in and takes her to a safe place for her to ground herself and Eddie is super sweet and caring and has a little crush on reader too. Maybe a lil smutty at the end? ❤️
Oh dear Anon, I very much feel with you 🌸💕
Thank you for this wonderful ask! I really hope I did it justice although I wasn't really feeling the smut in there ❤️
Your head was spinning by the time you stepped out of the front door and felt the fresh, nearly cold early spring air filling your nostrils. The situation inside had simply been way too much for you, so many people you barely ever seen on the school halls, the loud music that wasn’t exactly your taste plus those damned football team dudes who wouldn’t just stop with their stupid commentary.
“Oh, look, who finally crawled out into the open!”
“Hey, here’s the school cryptid!”
“See who left their nerd cave. Fucking geek!”
Although you really tried to enjoy this night your friend invited you out on, tried to play it cool in such a big crowd, the thoughts nagging from the far back of your head eventually got the better of you. They told you that you weren’t supposed to be here with all the popular kids, the footballers, the cheerleaders and right now it felt as if those thoughts were nothing but absolutely on point.
As you were placing one foot in front of the other in small steps, with eyes closed shut to block out the pure physical and mental overstimulation, you let your hands wander for the next best surface to hold on to.
“Hey..hey, I’m here!” You heard a somewhat familiar voice talking to you before you felt a soft tug at the sleeve of your shirt.
“It’s okay, we’re outside now.” The voice reassured you as the grip on your shirt softly pulled you to the left.
“Uh, Eddie?” You mumbled under your breath.
“Yeah, that’s me!” He chuckled softly, guiding you a handful of steps further to a lone bench on the outskirts of the premises.
You couldn’t hold yourself from smiling a little knowing it was Eddie who helped you out and as soon as you had the old, frequently sat upon wood of the bench underneath your searching fingers, you dared to open your eyes again.
The loud noise from the party left behind as well as all those people you just couldn’t connect with even if you tried. And trying to you did so painfully hard.
You expected to see calm trees in front of you, maybe even a dry, brown walking path but instead you unintentionally stared right into a pair of gentle, chestnut brown eyes. Eddie’s face was right in front of yours and you honestly couldn’t really tell what was more overwhelming: The party inside or the beautiful face right in front of you.
“Are you okay?” It spilled out of Eddie's soft, ridiculously plush, pink lips.
You wanted to answer but the words felt like a dry, raspy lump in your throat.
“Hey there! Planet earth is sending signals!” Ed’s waved his hand in front of your dumbfounded face.
“I’m good!” You eventually pressed out of yourself.
Eddie let a deep sigh roll over his tongue.
“I was really worried about you in there.”, He confessed, “You just froze in there and it didn’t look right to me at all…”
For a few more sentences he rambled on about how he was watching you in there for a while and saw how the football boys pestered you and how you grew more and more uncomfortable.
“Thank you, Eddie.” ,The words rolled over your tongue, “Thank you for caring about me.”
At that, Eddie paused for a moment.
“Of course I did!”, He said as soon as he gathered his composure, “I like you.”
To be fair, at this point quite a few drinks were roaming around your system and at first you thought they would help you navigate this party but instead they had you spilling your personal truth at him.
“I really like you, Eddie” It spilled from your lips and you felt your cheeks blushing.
“Like, really liking you…”
For the blink of an eye Eddie held his breath. His gaze wandered from your eyes to your worn out Metallica T-Shirt that you were wearing for as long as possible before the washing machine had to claim it again.
“Uhm…” He cleared his throat and straightened his black leather jacket “I do like you too…that way…”
#eddie munson fluff#eddie x reader#eddie stranger things#asks are always open#asks are appreciated#eddie munson#stranger things#eddie munson × reader#pigeon recieved#eddie munson x fem!reader smut#eddie munson imagine#eddie x fem!reader#eddie x plus size reader#eddie my beloved
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You said you have Parallel Canon ramblings that couldn't fit in the tags. Ramble away, fellow human.
Also, let me know if you find that post you mentioned being reminded of.
YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS yeah it was a more generalized thing (i saw it cropped and had to go find the image + search the exact phrasing but it's since been reblogged) the sentiment of being the 'evil' clone is up for debate i suppose. perhaps in a literal sense - yknow, antivirus that's been infected with malware; a copy and paste of code that was supposed to be 4 tweaked and repurposed into hostility. but it feels a little wrong to call them evil anyway. (there's also definitely a horror in that it's still your "friend" even while it's "evil" they jump to you they tell you they will they cry out when you kill them and you can hear it and isn't that just awful? they're all still someone that was supposed to be on your side. it's not just the voice clip it's not just a super jump indicator it's an 'ouch' ping it's a 'hey i am super jumping to you, my teammate, specifically' audio cue. this was supposed to be your friend.) and what if it still was! what if you ran with the same sort of angst as if it was genuinely 4 at first? what if eight saw that, remembered sanitized agent 3, and knocked/tore the mask off to save them and it worked? what's it like for everyone then? we know pearl is filling the role she's intended to be, so in that same sense people use that to bring 4 in you could use it to make a dawning horror sort of story. the slow realization that it's not. you could well have it still more directly attached to 4 through the palette too - i think this works well for most things and not just this specifically, like i do think it can play a pretty significant part in pcanon feeling so strongly that it is agent 4 even if it's not quite identical or doesn't remember everything or whatever - but ultimately it never really was. and so what then? for parallel and for everyone else? would it be cruel to acknowledge it? i would think it'd be a little uncomfortable for everyone involved no matter what. in contrast to never being treated like 4 in the first place, instead it is but only for a little bit. and then suddenly everyone starts getting a little... distant. uneasy. even if they never actually say anything about it there's still that nasty anxious feeling when it seems like everyone else knows something you don't and especially if you can tell it's something about you.
i also often find myself especially fascinated with what they are just in general tbh. that one i could touch on in the tags at least though. yknow, series of progressively more distorted photocopies. the first is almost pristine, just a little off from the book itself thanks to things like the weird seam copies get from the way the pages crease at the spine. and then when easy access to the book is lost and the copies start being copies of other copies it gets further and further away. burns. fading. other weird random marks. if the intro is anything to go by, they've all got their quirks. a hall of mirrors reflecting the reflection of the same person. ants that've gotten themselves confused, following each other's trail ever onward and onward into the death spiral because they don't know how to do anything but follow orders and march together. they're not quite like ants in that they're individuals, sure. with their own egos. but they're all still made from the same copy and pasted code, recopied, repasted, corrupted further by the virus hijacking them. and they all still act in harmony to do what they were supposed to do from the beginning. follow the directive, follow the pheromones, even if you've been trapped in a path you weren't supposed to take. (truthfully, i got in on the spiral of ants association just because of 'intensifying harmony' -> 'the overwhelming harmony (consuming the colony)' but since then i've ended up latching onto it more and making other connections lmao. You Are One Ant is something that's also stuck for a long time alongside the harmony connection which i've thought about drawing something for occasionally but honestly the whole pre-chorus at this point i think about a lot. the first one especially [you can't remember where you came from. you can't remember where you're going. you can't remember knowing.] but the now you remember/you have to keep it flowing also hits in its own way i think)
also like no matter how you interpret it, how much you think the main parallel can actually remember of "being 4", there's always going to be that light so bright it's blinding as soon as it gets a window into that, right? as soon as it gets to look in that mirror and see that life it doesn't have. the light none of them will ever reach.
in contrast to no matter how happy-go-lucky your 4 is this sort of thing would be crushing, it's also no matter how angsty your 4 is they still have more going for them than the parallels. they're living some sort of life and not just the hollow facsimile of one in a little anthill of a tower in a barren virtual reality. they do have friends even if they've felt neglected, right? but all the parallels really have is each other (and maybe order/smollusk) unless 8 or the others decide to reach out despite how weird that has to be for them.
it's just you and yourself and yourself and yourself and yourself and yourself and yourself and yourself and yourself and yourself (etc if you figure there's more than the ten we see on the floor 20 bossfight) living in the cold white dark. mere imitations of someone who did something meaningful. who was impressive enough for you to be created in the first place.
but then also, how many of them even care? at what point is that copy so distorted from those burns and fadings that it's still identical in text but completely unrecognizable from the book it came from? and what's it like to know there's a you that doesn't care that it's not you? what's it like to be one that doesn't care when however many do? i'd think it'd be a little offputting even if it's a perfect divide and they don't fight about it or anything. but it'd definitely be isolating if it was only a few of them on either side, too.
none of them are their own person but also they are. none of them are 4 but also they all are. it doesn't matter which way any of them look at it because they can never really be either.
NOT TO MENTION what happens when there isn't anything left to defend from? what happens between the time eight is there and marina making use of the memverse the way she intended to originally? let alone when it just isn't needed anymore in general! what happens to the memverse in general then, to both the parallels and to smollusk? what do they do when they're alone in there. unattended. when they're not following their directive and acting as security. i would think they'd just be interacting amongst themselves which is definitely fine between periods of eight going in with the different palettes but how well does it hold up in those sorts of long term situations?
btw looping back to the link to 4's palette imagine that and then when the palette is completed/cleared just... having that ripped away. you know. being so sure that they're someone else only to suddenly be forced to realize they're not. not just because of the way people are treating them but because all of a sudden there's just... something that's torn out of them and put inside of someone else. having a soul only to realize it's not yours when the real owner takes it back.
anyway yeah that's mostly what i've got off the top of my head but yknow. ultimately as much as i do like the [it actually is 4 au] stuff too i think the actual situation is soooo cool and also super underutilized tbh it's kind of a shame
#splatoon#parallel canon#(<- these r both for my organizational purposes and also. although i am more inclined to be reserved about it Yknow.)#(again i think it's underutilized. perhaps some day more people will see the Vision... from both of our posts...)#long post#sorry this is like chunky and rambly as hell and probably hard to read i'm going insane about this every time i think about it#also it's 1 am.
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through the hourglass 195. brb x oc
a/n:hm. not really fond of this one but oh well(comments and reblogs are super welcome and encouraged!! they make my nights they really do<3)
pairing: plus size!oc x rooster
warnings: none uwu
goodness gracious (pls read this one to know more what this fic is about!!)
chapter
1/
/132/133/134/135/136/137/138/139/140/141/142/143/144/145/146/147
/164/165/166/167/168/169/170/171/172/173/174/175/176/177/178/179/180/181/182/183/184/185/186/187/188/189/190/191/192/193/194
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-
The waiting room had this very weird picture of a woman holding a dog, it looked like she was holding it by it’s hind legs as it walked on the floor with the ones in front, kinda like a weird…person. Rooster stares at it for hours, well not hours, probably a few minutes since he got there.
He bounces his leg anxiously, huffing quietly while leaning back on the uncomfortable plastic seat as it creaks under his weight. He’s twenty minutes early but he doesn’t mind because the parking area was empty when he arrived, making it easier to stay inside his car for five minutes before getting in.
He rubs his wedding band, looking down at his watch to check the time before sighing, straightening his pose with his hands interlocked between his legs. The secretary was looking at her computer, the other people there were busy playing with their phones or reading, but he was too fidgety to do anything like that.
And Bea knew.
-
Beatrice peeked into the closet, watching her husband lean his weight against the wall, partially clothed with a shirt on his hands, “...Roos?” he snaps his head up with a gasp, eyes wide and she immediately shows her palms to him, “It’s okay!It’s me!I’m sorry,I was just…checking on you because you said you were going to change and have something to eat but you uh…are still here.”
His chest moves as he breathes, dropping his gaze to the shirt, furrowing his brows only for him to rub his eyes, “Are you okay?’ she asks and he takes a while to reply.
“I think my nervousness came back.” he laughs with his hands still on his face, “I’m okay.”
“Are you sure?”
Rooster lowers his hands, giving Beatrice a small smile. "Yeah, I'll be fine," he says, "Just feeling a bit anxious about the therapy session."
Beatrice steps leaning against the wall next to him, gently brushing his hand with her fingers. "It's okay to feel nervous," she says softly, "Therapy can be overwhelming, but it's also a brave step you're taking."
He nods, resting his head on her shoulder. "I know," he says, "I don’t know why I’m so nervous.”
She hums, kissing the top of his head once he’s resting on her shoulder, “I think it’s because you’ll share the darkest parts of you that you haven’t in a very,very long time Roos.” she whispers against his scalp, “Maybe unravel some demons that have been hidden inside, you know?” he makes a face once she says it and she stutters a bit, “It’s not bad. You know that, some of the stuff was out before,wasn’t it?”
“Some of it, yeah,” he mutters, “I…just don’t know if I’ll be okay talking about my mom’s passing, or even my dad’s for that matter. Not as deeply.”
She hums, still holding his hand as she looks at her feet, “You can always tell the therapist your boundaries,Roos. You guys don’t have to talk about it now.”
Rooster takes a deep breath, "Yeah, you're right," he says, "I'll let the therapist know what I'm comfortable with discussing." he clicks his tongue against his teeth, “How long until you felt comfortable with therapy?”
Beatrice smiles, dropping her head a bit while sighing. "A few months,I blurted a lot of stuff out first, then got told some truths by Dr.Varma…then I started to get better. But it wasn’t until I met you that the changes were more visible."
Rooster nods, listening attentively to Beatrice's experience with therapy. "I'm glad you found it helpful," he says, “...you never told me what Dr.Varma says about me."
Beatrice smiles warmly, leaning her head against his. "What do you want me to say?" she says, “She was just happy I was happy…she also said you were one in a million." she grins,kissing his cheek as she rubs his hand, “You are though,I tell you that often.”
He does appear more relaxed, sighing quietly before looking down at the shirt on the floor. He picks it up, turns it a bit on his hands then slips it on as he straightened himself from the wall, “You do.” he smirks, running his hands down his torso to fix the creases, “And does she know I adore you and call you gorgeous all the time?”
Beatrice chuckles, nodding. "Yes, she knows," she says, "I may have mentioned it once or twice during our sessions." She winks playfully at Rooster, “And that you can be…relentless.
Rooster grins, tucking his shirt in. "Well, it's true," he says, "You are absolutely gorgeous, inside and out. And I can be a little bit relentless."
Beatrice blushes, feeling a warm rush of affection for her husband. "Just a little,huh?" she says, "I love you, Roos."
"I love you too," Rooster says, pulling her close for a sweet kiss once he’s done dressing up. "Thank you for being here with me, supporting me through this."
"Always," Beatrice says, wrapping her arms around him,. "I'm so proud of you for taking this step, and I know you'll do great in therapy."
Rooster leans his forehead against hers, smiling softly."I don't know what I'd do without you." her gaze softens and she opens her mouth to reply but he cuts her off, “...I mean it, you…are such a strong positive force in my life,I really am glad you are here with me.” he pauses, “...it makes it easier when you aren’t alone.”
She tuts quietly, cupping his cheeks, “Aw,Roos.” she kisses his forehead, “Baby, you are very strong, you know that right? You are unbelievably strong. And this shows how much.” he smiles sweetly, looking away from her, “Promise me you’ll do what feels comfortable,alright? And not push yourself too much.”
“...I promise.”
She grins,kissing his lips, “Good.”
-
And he’s back at the waiting room. Leg still bouncing as he waits. He huffs again,crossing his arms over his chest as he stares down to his watch, his session will begin in five minutes, so that was good.
He chews the side of his nail randomly, then pauses because he never did that. He just hides his hand under his bicep again until he hears a voice, “Bradley?” the secretary calls, “The doctor is waiting for you.”
“Oh uh,” he blinks, “I thought I’d be up in five minutes?”
“The last patient left a bit early, so you can go in,” she gestures to a hallway, “He’s at the last door down his hallway.”
Rooster nods, taking a deep breath to steady himself. He stands up, offering a small smile to the secretary, grateful for her reassurance. "Thank you," he says, "I appreciate it."
With Beatrice's words of support echoing in his mind, Rooster walks down the hallway,digging his hands in his pockets. It looks a lot longer than he expected, maybe that was his own mind playing tricks on him. There were paintings of different kinds adorning the walls: landscapes, dogs, fruits, even another lady and a strange dog staring back at him. He frowns, looking away before he sees the door at the end, swallowing nervously to speed up his steps until he’s right in front of it. He takes a moment to gather his thoughts, jawline clenched, before knocking softly.
"Come in," a calm voice calls from inside.
Rooster enters,peeking from the door, finding a comfortable and inviting office with a cozy atmosphere. The therapist, Dr. Paulson, is seated behind a desk, he looks a middle-aged man -maybe in his 50s or 60s - with thick glasses that cover his eyes,short, and he's dressed in a professional yet casual manner, wearing a button-up shirt and khaki pants.
The office is tastefully decorated with soft colors and plush furniture, creating a calming and safe environment. There are shelves filled with books on psychology and personal growth, as well as some calming artwork on the walls.
As Rooster steps further into the room, Dr. Paulson smiles warmly, motioning to the seat across from his desk. "Please, have a seat," he says in a gentle voice, "I'm Dr. Paulson. It's nice to meet you."
Rooster takes a deep breath, feeling a mixture of nerves and relief as he sits down. "Nice to meet you too," he says, his voice slightly shaky, "I'm Bradley.”
Dr. Paulson nods, offering an understanding smile. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Bradley," he says, "Thank you for coming in today. How are you feeling?"
Rooster takes a moment to gather his thoughts before answering, tapping his fingers against the chair’s arms. "I'm a bit nervous," he admits, "I haven’t been to a therapist since I was a teenager."
Dr. Paulson leans back in his chair, his kind eyes showing empathy. "It's completely normal to feel nervous," he says, "Coming to therapy can be a big step, especially if it's been a while. But I want you to know that this is a safe and confidential space where you can talk about anything that's on your mind."
Rooster nods, appreciating the reassurance. "Thank you," he says, "I just… I know there are things I need to work through, and I want to be a better husband and father."
Dr. Paulson nods understandingly. "It takes courage to acknowledge that," he says, "And I commend you for taking this step to seek support. Why don’t we start small? How about we start from you, then go all the way to your family? Would that be alright?"
Rooster takes another deep breath,this time scratching the wooden arms with his nails. "Yeah,that’s fine." he says, watching as the doctor grabs a notebook “You uh, you’ve been helping a lot of the personnel at the base. They were the ones who told me about you."
Dr. Paulson nods, jotting down a few notes in his notebook. "Yes, I've had the privilege of working with many individuals from the base," he says, “ I'm glad they recommended me to you."
Rooster glances around the office,analyzing the decor. "Yeah," he says, "They spoke highly of you, said you're really good at what you do."
The therapist smiles humbly. "Thank you for the kind words," he says, "I'm here to support you in any way I can. Now, you mentioned feeling nervous about therapy. Is there anything specific you'd like to talk about today or any areas you feel comfortable starting with?"
Rooster looks down at his hands, fidgeting with the hem of his shirt. "I guess I want to work through some past experiences," he admits, "Like my time in the military and... losing my parents at a young age."
Dr. Paulson nods understandingly. "Losing a parent at a young age can be a very impactful and challenging experience," he says, "And being in the military comes with its own unique set of challenges. I'm here to listen and support you as you explore these experiences and any emotions that come up."
Rooster takes a deep breath, finding some comfort in the therapist's words. "Okay…”
-
Beatrice chews her nail as she waits for Rooster to come home, she’s pacing around the living room, the three dogs are busy surrounding Nicole so they don’t really care much about what’s going on around them, in fact they are all busy watching tv alongside the toddler to care.
As Beatrice paces anxiously, tapping her hands together and only stopping when she hears the sound of the garage door opening.She holds still, she hears the roar from the Bronco slowing down to nothing, the car door opening and closing, soon followed by his feet walking up to the side door.
She turns to see Rooster stepping inside, his back to her as he places his keys aside, turning around to meet her gaze. He looks tired but also relieved, as if a weight has been lifted off his shoulders, a little smile on his face. The dogs, sensing his return, excitedly rush to greet him, their tails wagging and tongues hanging out which meant that Nicole was aware of it as well.
The little toddler slides off the couch and waddles past her mother to her father, her little arms going up and Rooster wastes no time in picking her under the armpits.
Beatrice smiles warmly, her worry easing a little as she sees him. "Hey," she says softly, "How was it?"
Rooster's tired smile widens as he looks at Beatrice, holding Nicole in his arms. "It was good," he says, "A little overwhelming at times, but I think it was really helpful. Dr. Paulson is great."
Beatrice steps closer, wrapping her arms around Rooster and Nicole, giving them both a gentle squeeze. "I'm so glad to hear that," she says, her voice filled with relief and pride, "I knew you could do it. How are you feeling now?"
He takes a moment to gather his thoughts, measuring his thoughts. "I feel... better," he admits, "I know it's just the beginning, but I'm hopeful."
"You're doing great," Beatrice says, leaning up to place a soft kiss on Rooster's cheek, "I'm really proud of you."
Rooster turns his head to give her a loving smile. "Thank you," he says, "I couldn't have done it without you."
Beatrice's heart swells with love for her husband and their little family. "We're in this together, remember?" she says, echoing her words from earlier, "No matter what, we're here for each other."
Rooster nods, his gaze filled with gratitude. "I know," he says, "Anyway,” he clears his throat, “How was your day? What did you do?”
“I went to the Hard Deck.”
“Oh?”
‘Yeah,I uh, you know, wanted to see Penny before we go there tomorrow.” she crosses her arms over her bust, “She’s saying the corpo guys stopped coming over.”
“That’s good right?” his wife doesn’t seem comforted, “What?”
“I just,” she clicks her tongue while sighing, rubbing her neck, “Something in me is like…telling me something is off,Roos. I don’t know,I know I said I don’t want to be stressed because of the twins but, Penny said the cameras didn’t get anything but…” she pauses, “...I’m just,voicing my thoughts,sorry.”
Rooster listens attentively to Beatrice, then reaches out to gently hold her hand, rubbing her knuckles. "It's okay to voice your thoughts,gorgeous" he says, "If something doesn't feel right, it's important to pay attention to those instincts...we both know that."
Beatrice nods, appreciating his understanding. "I know it might be nothing," she says, "And I don't want to stress over it unnecessarily, especially with the twins on the way. But I can't help but feel a little uneasy."
"I understand," Rooster says, "Maybe we can talk to Penny together and see if there's anything specific that's been bothering her. It's always better to be cautious, especially when it comes to security."
Beatrice smiles gratefully at him, feeling comforted by his support. "Thank you," she says, "I'd really appreciate that. But… after tomorrow,right? Then we can," she moves her free hand a bit, “Relax I suppose.”
Rooster squeezes her hand gently. "Always," he says, "We're a team, remember?” he coos, kissing her forehead, “Now,come on,I’m tired and need a bath.”
#bradley rooster bradshaw#rooster bradshaw#bradley bradshaw x oc#top gun maverick#bradley bradshaw x reader#bradley bradshaw x female reader#bradley bradshaw x named reader#tgm oc#tgm fic#tgm fanfiction
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Ten asks part … idk I’m losing count of these
(ノ≧ڡ≦)✨
Why DOES EVERYONE DO THIS ? This is like the fourth time 😭😭😭 please- @chickenmilk120
They were so bored 😔 then they signed up for more than what they bargained for TTwTT but ? Maybe seeing Greg survive the horrors will let them move on peacefully later ??? Them just spying on the three star fam and Freddy knowing is kinda hilarious to think about
@krispenelopebacon ayyy I’m responding this even later than when you sent the ask it’s good >> he didn’t really think much about it but it definitely felt weird to be in pain and bleed, he was super uncomfortable and possibly overstimulated from it even after it got treated, all the feelings and senses can be overwhelming when you’re used to being a robot without a nervous system.
@emotionalflamingo Jeremy possessing Glamrock Bonnie would be so perfect :v since fronnie is canon I think ? Anyway >> yeah he is old xD gosh darn, even as a zombie if he had met Gregory in security breach he would be more like grandpa age really
@imanol2409 hola ^^ si, la verdad me cuesta dibujar en este momento pero definitivamente quiero continuar la historia al poder :’> CC tiene muchos nombres y ya me decidí por uno pero me gusta el chiste de que nadie sabe cual es >>
@reallyorginalname1 I’m not even sure myself ? Was he a human ? Is he an experiment? Is he a really smart bear ? We might never know … he also speaks Spanish for the record but all my Gregorys do ^^ just a fun fact
@willthemechanist Aw ;0; yes you may! He will make a mess of it tho he can’t use a spoon :’v poor thing will need a bath afterwards
@justmchell yeah basically 😭 he’s just screaming high pitched and wiggling to escape but eventually gives up and falls asleep lmao
Had to look up what that means :0 maybe to an extent ? His brain does register everything as a game but unlike when he was GGY he knows there’s consequences to killing so he’s still very destructive and will even harm people if he has to but never kills even if it’s a game :> that’s the one rule he won’t break after what he did the last time he was brainwashed
@avtfol BAJDBJD axolotl are so silly no braincells xD def fits 👌yeah he could have a British accent honestly everyone did keep telling him he was speaking weird because at first I wanted it to be like he just dropped the accent and was talking like Freddy does, but some dubs just kept it and it still sounds funny and nice ? Like a mix of both ;w; it’s up for interpretation ^^ love learning about how other people picture things 💖
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floor time!!!!
i'm trying to find things to post about, even if they're not actually that interesting to share LOL, bc i have more time since I'm not hosting someone 24/7 but i still feel very overwhelmed by ~~life~~ so i am trying to use it to idk be present. retain some small level of connection, because my instinct when i feel like this is to disappear and be as invisible as possible, and i always find it hard for myself to walk back from when i give into that. i have so many msgs from the last few months i still haven't answered 😫 i still have birthday messages i never replied to, also a couple of friends that i should be catching up with but i don't want to lol, so i'm uhh just not messaging them back
our current 'theme' for afternoon tea at work is personality quizzes, this week's person chose a love language quiz, i've always thought love languages were about how you /show/ love, apparently it is about how you prefer to receive it!? even tho its not inherently romantic and these activities are supposed to be shared in a super low stakes and fun/silly way a big part of me was like uh i don't really want to do this in a work environment?? also the particular quiz that we did had like 30 questions that i genuinely think were the same 5 questions over and over and over, for some reason about five questions in it started to make me feel extremely uncomfortable, almost upset?? i don't really know why, it could have been bc it felt like i was being asked the same thing over and over, as if i was answering questions and not being heard. also i felt like 25 of the questions were 'do you prefer a gentle touch or an unexpected small gift', 'would you like to be hugged in public or overhear someone compliment you' will this quiz please STOP asking me if i want to be touched after i just said i don't!! i have a reputation amongst my family and friends for preferring not to be touched, its something that people have always commented on especially when i was a teenager. i was just never very tactile! the only time when i feel like i participated in a lot of social/casual touch was at church camps growing up, i think bc its one of those very short but heightened experiences that almost have a sense of fantasy? like you're not in the real world. and i did like being close with those people a lot, we shared important and intimate moments of growth in my life and they were people i loved but only got to see once a year so yeah it felt right to put more into it in the few chances we all got to spend together in this very formative environment, but it never felt as natural for me to be that way in regular life, i always preferred not to be touched once normal life resumed again and i feel like people always thought i was strange for not wanting it. maybe i still have a complex about that lol. anyway my main love language turned out to be quality time, which i didn't even know was an option. also i think. i don't like the term 'love language' it feels yuck maybe. my work friend and i both scored highest for quality time but were confused because we both love to be alone, we decided it was how we showed love to ourselves 😂
#me 🤝 the one monk in the room scoring 0 for physical touch SDGFSDJK#yeah#maybe it also made me feel uncomfortable bc i am currently feeling more 'don't look at me' than usual#and don't want a quiz about ~~ love languages~~ ew trying to identify me and then have to share my identity publicly lol#if anyone has any interesting ideas for personality quizzes i could use when its my turn ;__;#i've never really liked personality quizzes so i don't have any ideas#maybe god has orchestrated this afternoon tea theme to force me out of just hiding myself away 😂 rude!#tp
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Also that time of the month for another gender identity ramble/crisis cause thinking about he/they again and hey it’s tumblr where else am I gonna see other people try and be as open about their feelings?
But when I see myself and my body, I’m reminded about how I’ve always felt so uncomfortable around other guys in general. Like I was never super friendly with a lot of people out of my own anxiety getting in the way, and in middle/high school I ended up with a lot of guy friends. But it really didn’t make me super happy? Of course I enjoyed them around but it never made me feel like… they were actual friends? But my friends now are mostly gender-fluid, women or enby. And it’s definitely more… comforting to me? I get nervous about how masculine I can present at times. And it’s never really on purpose considering I’m very… awkward and weird sometimes in conversation. I got tested for autism once and it didn’t turn out to be the case so who knows why I’m like this. Side tracked myself and idk where I’m really going with this, deranged rambling. I feel like he/they might end up being the case for me but I don’t… really know how to embrace it? I’m stupid and stubborn at times and I forget things, but I never want to make anyone uncomfortable kink encouragement or otherwise. And if you send a dm to talk or an ask I promise I read them!! I just get easily overwhelmed and scared there’s a lot of you here now and 99% of people have been so nice. I just want to really feel happiness more this year after hitting a low point last year. So thanks for dealing with my insane anxiety/depression rant I am just vulnerable and scared too muchhhh
Yeah idk if this made any sense and maybe I’m just extra delusional tonight but sometimes I need to word vomit my emotions out. I am just very confused at all times thabk youuuu
🌀💿🌀💿🌀💿🌀💿🌀💿🌀
#rambling a little :)#or a lot#aromantic#pronouns#more like#pro-create with me if you get fat for me#hehoo weight gain joke pls laugh#my crops are dying#and they need fat tumby to survive
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autistic mike wheeler headcanons
*IMPORTANT* i'm reposting this post because my original post of this is not showing up under the tags and i don't know why. i mean i have an idea but nothing to prove it so... anyways i'm reposting this with some edits to try and fix it. so if you come across an identical copy of this post from me..yeah..well...that's-that's why...anyways!
this is to go along with my autistic will byers headcanons post. just a reminder that this isn't an analysis and is instead my own personal headcanons for mike being autistic as an autistic individual myself
mike is touch adverse. he really dislikes people touching him unless their people he's lose to and in his case it's the party and occasionally nancy and holly
his special interest is dnd, star wars, and will's art. he loves to infodump with the party because they share his interests even if not to his extent. he loves infodumping to will though when will draws because sometimes will draws things based off mike's rambles and mike gets so excited about adding it to his binder
he hyperfixated on both el and eddie a little bit. when he was little mike also had a special interest in super heroes and el reminded him of super heroes with her powers so he became fixated/entranced by her. eddie was super into dnd and was basically everything that mike wanted to be; he expressed himself the way he wanted and didn't care, love dnd, acted confident. so he became super fixated on him and started to model himself after eddie because eddie to mike was both really cool and embraced mike's biggest special interest.
he's very hyperverbal. he often has so many thoughts and ideas that they're so overwhelming he needs to express them verbally in order to get them out and help his brain relax.
mike has verbal stim. he likes to click and roll his tongue to help him focus. he typically does this when he's alone because people have picked on him and he's been reprimanded by teachers for doing it at school so he's kind of shy about it
mike like's to stim by flapping his hands and jumping spinning in circles (separately). he also likes to verbal stim while doing this when he really feels like he has a lot of pent up energy
he's really bad at interpreting social cues and sarcasm. a lot of it just goes right over his head. when people try to explain it to him he just doesn't get it even when thinking back to the situation.
his difficulty with social cues causes people to sometimes get frustrated with him and he gets frustrated back because he doesn't understand what he did that they didn't like
growing up he also like to hold hands with will and he didn't understand why people gave them looks and why lonnie got really mad. he stopped mainly because of will getting bullied and he wanted to protect will
mike has a very limited number of safe foods and these safe foods change for him from time to time. more often than not though he does prefer crunchy foods to soft foods
when he has meltdowns he mostly wants to be left alone. everything is too much for him so he likes to be in a really dark room with no noise. he ends up verbal stimming and rocking to try and self sooth. he really hates people touching him during a meltdown or when he's over stimulated. will is able to talk to him though and is able to get yes and no answers out of mike sometimes and help him if his stims start to become self-harming
he has alexithymia. he struggles a lot, and i mean a lot, with recognizing his feelings.
even though mike is hyperverbal he does often struggle to verbalize his thoughts a lot of the time. often times he finds writing his thoughts helps to put together his ideas
he really hates the clothes his mom made him wear growing up. the tags were beyond painful and he would tell his mom this but she didn't understand what he was talking about so she didn't really listen. mike ended up bring his clothes to mrs. byers sometimes because she noticed how uncomfortable he was and offered to fix them
i feel like i could definitely keep going with this one but then i'll feel bad if this one is significantly longer than my will byers one. might come back to edit it in the future though. let me know your thoughts!
#autistic#actually autistic#autistic mike wheeler#mike wheeler#mike wheeler is autistic#autistic headcanon#stranger things#stranger things headcanons#autistic stranger things#byler#will byers#the party#mike wheeler i know what you are#mike wheeler my beloved#mike wheeler defender#mike wheeler loves will byers#will byers loves mike wheeler#joyce byers#nancy wheeler#he just like me fr#stimming#verbal stim#hand flapping#eddie munson#touch sensitive#spins#el hopper#eleven hopper
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