#yea this is about Izzy hands

[goofygooberton]

Note to self: do not go into tag for a fandom after finishing a show

[anarchistbitch]

cant believe he went after more than 1(one) of izzy toes. like did izzy start getting the ketchup ready after the 2nd toe cause girl-

[icallhimjoey]

hi hello yes

sorry, SORRY, sorry! this took a second longer than originally anticipated, but, here it is, live from italy! enjoy! (tw: we get spicy, and we also cut our finger on a kitchen knife, but it's only minor, and it ultimately gets kissed better, so we're fine) Wordcount: 2.8K

---

All The Aces

part one - part two - part three - part four - part five

You laid on your side, face pressed firmly into your pillow, and looked at Joe who was doing something on his phone. Answering someone who should’ve gotten a reply hours ago, most likely.

He wasn’t wearing a shirt, sheets loosely covering him up to about his waist, and his hair looked insane.

It always did, after.

You loved it like that. Frizzy, wild, completly unruly, every piece curling a different way.

Gorgeous.

Little shit.

Joe must’ve felt how you were looking at him, because you caught him sneaking a little look from the corner of his eye before he pretended he didn’t just make direct eye-contact with you and shifted focus right back to the small screen in his hands.

“I know what you’re doing…”

You saw how a slow smile grew on his face. One that he immediately tried to hide, which was of no use.

“Yea?”

Joe couldn’t lose his grin if he wanted to. Giving you another glance made him lock his phone before putting it down on his beside table.

“Wow. Fourth time.” Joe commented, and he phrased it like he was impressed, but you knew it wasn’t with you.

Joe was impressed with himself.

“You’re sick, you know that? Like an actual sociopath.”

It felt a bit silly how you hadn’t fully realised what was going on until just now. After the fourth time it happened.

Four times.

Joe laughed as he got comfortable in bed, tucking himself in for the good night’s rest his smug little face suggested he thought he really deserved.

“I’m just following instructions.” Joe leant over a little and planted a chaste kiss to your forehead before he turned over. “Night night.”

And you know what… you kind of agreed.

You were sort of impressed with him too, but you would never tell him to his face. Obviously. Although, in a weird twist of the truth, it was actually proving yourself right more than Joe probably thought he was doing.

You’d not been fucking around when you said that sex wasn’t just about the orgasm. And the first time, with hindsight, you kind of couldn’t believe that you hadn’t immediately known.

It was a couple days after you’d had that whole discussion with Izzy present, and Joe had challengingly said he was going to prove you wrong. He’d not said a word about it since, and so you’d forgotten about it.

You’d been play bickering all day - mild bullying that touched lines, but skillfully never crossed them.

You’d caught Joe looking into a mirror for a while, and had just watched him for a little bit before you went, “Just admiring, are we?”

He’d nearly jumped out of his skin. Hadn’t seen you were there.

“You fucking...” Joe said through his teeth before loudly exhaling.

You couldn’t help the giggles that escaped you as you said, “Sorry, sorry! I’m clearly interrupting something. I’ll give you and your reflection some privacy.”

“Come here!”

He’d taken three quick steps towards you, but you were faster and scurried away before his extended arms could grab you.

To retaliate, Joe had very innocently asked if you could go grab his charger from his bedroom whilst he was busy cooking dinner, not mentioning that he’d seen a fat spider near it just mere minutes ago.

And who were you to deny him a little help when he was literally making you soup from scratch?

The way you’d shrieked from across his flat had made him smile into a taste-testing spoonfull of cooked veg.

It had gone back and forth like that for a bit, sly comments and inside jokes thrown across the table, silly faces and swearwords that ultimately only fed the joy that sparked.

That was, until you were cleaning up after dinner, filling up and already overfilled dishwasher, when Joe decided it’d be hilarious to jumpscare you.

He snuck up, moved real slow, got real close, and then suddenly grabbed you at the waist whilst you were bent over and gave a loud, “BAH!”

The sound you made as you jumped was immediately followed by a loud wince.

“Oh no,” Joe’s vice grip around your waist lost strength immediately as you curled in on yourself, one hand clasping the other tightly. “Did you cut yourself?”

You kept quiet and focussed on the sharp pain that quickly dulled and replaced itself with a light sting.

You hadn’t cut yourself.

Joe had cut you.

Indirectly.

On his huge chef’s knife that you carefully wanted to give a good spot in between all the dirty pots and pans.

“Let me see. Did you cut yourself?” Joe turned you around by the shoulders, but you fought against it and turned to the sink instead.

Water went from slightly red to a little more orange until it ran clear - the cut was only little, but from the way you’d fallen silent, Joe struggled with immediate onset guilt whilst deeply wishing to keep the mood light and playful like it had been all day.

He wished you’d turn and call him a dickhead.

He wished you’d turn and punch him in the bicep.

“Is it bad? Come on, let me see.” Joe tried again, softer and sweeter now, trying to look over your shoulder.

You turned your head to look at him, and for a moment, you just stared at each other. Joe sort of awkward and entirely unsure of what to do. You sort of blankly, figuring out your next steps.

Which was, be careful what you wish for Joe, an unexpected punch to the bicep.

“What the fuck, Joe – did I cut myself?”

The happy relief Joe felt at your small smile underneath the scolding saved the moment.

“You did that! Did this! Look at it!”

“Sorry, I’m sorry! But, who the fuck holds a knife by the blade?”

“I was trying to make it fit in there!”

“And you had to hold it by the blade for that?” Joe’s smile grew, and you used your shoulder to shove him in response, eyes crinkling from your smile, but gaze back on your finger.

“Can you grab me the scissors?” you asked, reaching for a drawer filled with a lot of clutter, among which you knew there were some plasters.

“Yea, of course,” Joe got you his pair of kitchen scissors, but before handing them over, he forced eye-contact and turned serious for moment as he said, “That was my fault. Sorry. Does it hurt?”

And it only did a little.

You were fine.

Joe helped wrap your finger up with a plaster and the rest of your evening had passed fairly uneventful.

Joe’s little accident had ended the streak of teasing you had going, and instead, he’d turned a little soft. By ways of apologising, you were sure.

And then that mood carried over into his bed, where you sat on the edge of the foot of Joe’s bed after you got into your pyjamas, whilst Joe climbed into his side of the bed. You inspected the plaster around your finger, squeezed and pressed over the cut to feel the slight sting there still. Joe’s foot that nudged your bum interrupted you.

You looked over your shoulder and saw how Joe leant an elbow into your pillow, head leant back against the headboard with a slow smile and eyes that twinkled with just enough cheek to let you know he wasn’t all that tired yet.

“Stings.” You said as let yourself fall back just enough to get your legs up on the bed before crawling across.

“Maybe don’t touch it.” Joe said, using a hand to push down covers for you.

“Maybe don’t scare someone when they’re doing you a favour.”

You were about to get under the covers, but then, Joe changed his mind.

“Okay, fine. Come here.” Joe sat up more, spread his legs, and used both his hands to pull you into the spot in between.

“Careful! I am wounded!”

“Yea, yea, yea…” two strong hands started kneading your shoulders even before you’d fully settled with your back against his front. You immediately relaxed and let yourself sag into him, head bumping against his collarbone as you did.

“I did say I was sorry, didn’t I?” Joe said softly, close to your ear.

“Hmm.. if I say you did, will you keep going?”

Joe huffed a small laugh and pressed a kiss to the top of your shoulder before whispering, “Sorry again.” into your skin.

And this was the type of shit that you lived for.

Tender touches that were just firm enough to make you feel something, alternated with feather light touches from finger tips that trailed down your arms slowly before they found their way back to your shoulders again.

Across your back.

To your neck.

Up into your hair, a little.

Gave you goosbumps.

Shivers.

Joe’s fingertips dug into flesh, and his mouth would leave gentle kisses right in the spot where your shoulder met the side of your neck.

If there was any stress secretly housing somewhere in your body that you didn’t know about, Joe was finding it. Getting rid of it. Letting it leak right out of you.

You allowed your mind to go absolutely blank.

No thoughts.

Just Joe’s touches.

Pure bliss.

Joe’s fingers roamed all over, then slid into your hair to massage at your scalp and you let your eyes flutter closed as your breath hitched.

“Does that feel good?” Joe softly murmured, full attention on the soft noises you were making under his hands.

“Mhmm,” you nodded, but only slightly. Couldn’t muster up more movement.

“Here, wait,” Joe suddenly shifted and pulled you from your daze a little as he sat up more. But then you felt how his hands were trying to find the hem of your top, and you leant forward to help him undress you.

“Sit back,” Joe said after tossing it, and this time, his finger tips rounded out to your front where he let both his hands stroke the soft skin of your chest.

You couldn’t help but arch your back, pulling your shoulders back slightly to push your chest forward, presenting more skin for Joe to touch.

“Yea, that feels good, doesn’t it?” Joe softly commented after you let a shuddery breath escape you, and you could hear Joe’s smile in his voice.

You weren’t ignorant, but you were definitely actively ignoring Joe’s hard length that pressed into your back.

You had felt Joe get hard just after he’d started this.

“Y-yea,” you answered Joe, voice breathy enough to feel Joe twitch. “Feels really good. Never stop, please.”

“Hmm,” Joe hummed, fingers drawing shapes over your collarbones, up the sides of your neck, then down the front over the soft skin of your chest. Joe felt how your skin started feeling hotter to the touch. Heard how your breathing hitched at every inhale.

“Want to know what else feels good?”

Before you could even properly answer his question, he was already moving. Moving from behind you, hands that held you by the shoulders and moved you aside to he could slip out of bed.

“Wha– I said, never stop.”

But then Joe got his hands on your knees and placed himself in between on his stomach as he spread your legs, and he raised a stupid eyebrow before mouthing at your inner thigh.

And, yea. All right.

This view wasn’t all that bad.

Joe looked up at you as he let his mouth climb up your leg, and you could feel your chest bloom.

Joe was so pretty.

You loved his nose. Loved his eyelashes. Loved his stupid freckles and his stupid lines across his forehead.

“Come up here,” you surprised yourself.

“What?” Joe already had a finger hooked in your underwear, but paused and raised his head a little.

“I want you up here.”

Your lips were jealous of your legs; wanted Joe’s mouth for themselves. Wanted Joe’s weight on top of you. Wanted Joe inside.

“But…” you saw how Joe’s eyes flicked down before they looked up and made eye-contact with you again. “What about what I want?”

Your underwear got slid to the side, and Joe let his brow frown a little as you made a little noise of impatience.

“Do you need reminding of how we got here?”

And, Jesus, okay. Fine.

You knew Joe enjoyed getting his mouth on you, but it was somehow also always a surprise that sometimes he seemed to like it more than anything else.

Your underwear got removed, and Joe coaxed you to lay back.

“Get comfy. I’m going to be here a while.”

Had anybody else said that, it would’ve passed for a corny joke. But Joe said it, and he was serious.

Joe got his mouth on you and from every single move he made, he let you know he wasn’t in a hurry. He let his tongue swirl slowly, would suckle and lick and nose at your velvety-soft skin until you were floating.

Joe knew how to make you feel good.

He’d learnt very quickly how to make you feel good.

Took him one week, actually, to be precise.

And who were you to complain about something so lovely? About having a boyfriend that you had low-key bullied all day who desperately wanted to eat you out still? You could be kind. Be polite and let him have what he wanted.

But Joe was working himself up.

Was aching in his boxers.

Kept trying to find pressure by pushing his hips into his mattress. Knew his precum was likely leaving a wet patch on his sheets.

But Joe liked what he was doing too much to do anything about what was stirring in his underwear.

And he kept you on the edge.

Just far enough away from an orgasm, but close enough to feel that it was there.

Lingering.

Somewhere off in the distance.

Felt good.

You could live here forever.

And you felt like you did, a little. Because Joe was leisurely taking his time, absolutely in no rush of moving on from what he was doing. Joe went on until his own sounds became more pornographic than whatever you were letting slip past your lips. You then suddenly felt him wiggle, and looked down to see him struggle out of his own underwear urgently without letting his tongue lose contact with you.

“Joe,” you moaned, and you meant, hurry up.

With a final strong flick of his tongue, Joe sat up onto his knees and towered over you a second as he pulled himself free from his boxers.

“Oh, my God.”

Joe was leaking precum, more than what you’d expected. You wanted to tell him how you liked that. How that was stupidly hot of him.

How dare he get so turned on by eating you out?

But you didn’t get the chance to say anything, because quickly Joe let his mouth find yours, and you finally got what you’d asked for.

Joe’s kisses were feverish, almost desperate. He let himself slip inside of you, both ways, his tongue doing the most to find yours and his hipbones pushing forward until they pressed you into the mattress.

“I’m gonna come,” you’d never heard his voice sound so constricted as his hips bucked, refusing to let up.

It had literally been just a few seconds.

Like he couldn’t fucking help himself.

Like he got so worked up eating you out that there was no way back now.

And you fucking loved it.

A man who couldn’t control himself, turning himself on past the point of no return by trying to make you feel good?

What a fucking dream.

And he wasn’t joking, either.

Joe pressed his forehead against your cheek, his heavy breath warm on your neck, and then his panting turned into groans.

With shuddering movements and loud grunts, Joe orgasmed, pressing you into the mattress with so much strength, you thought he’d never quite been deeper inside of you.

After a few seconds, he stilled, and went lax. Let every single muscle relax as he caught his breath, and Jesus fucking Christ, you loved it so much. Heavy weight on top, blissed out boy. Bare back right there for you to drag finger nails across. Short curls, wet behind his ears, right there for you to play with.

After a while, you felt how soft wet kisses got pressed into your neck, and you smiled at how adored you felt.

Going to sleep after that, being held in his sheets, arms and legs tangled, faces close, feeling loved and lovely and so, so sleepy, you almost didn’t register Joe finding your finger, the one with the plaster, and bringing it over to his mouth to give it the smallest little peck.

This was the type of shit being together with Joe was all about.

Everything felt safe, and sweet, and sort of glorious as you slowly drifted off.

That was the first time.

The first time of the four of you not realising.

You hadn’t even cared, or had even noticed for that matter, that you hadn’t orgasmed.

Didn’t cross you mind once.

The sex had been good. You had really enjoyed yourself.

So, see?

Joe was wrong.

And he’d just given you the best example that proved you right.

---

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add yourself

[ladyluscinia]

Izzy Hands Is Manipulative, But Not That Way

...or I finally finish that long ass meta post about why I love the fucking Navy Plot lol

The Izzy manipulation debate has been really interesting to me pretty much since it started, because I'd see a post arguing he's manipulating Edward and go "No, and he couldn't if he tried" and then the next post would say he sucks at manipulation because he's a blunt fucking instrument and I'd go "Yea- wait. Hmm. No, he can be targeted and tricky as fuck." Which does, on its surface, seem like a contradictory stance, but I swear it works.

Because the thing with Izzy - and this is such a fun thing imo - is there are two core types of manipulation that characters engage in, and Izzy fucking sucks at the one you expect his style of antagonist to focus on. But he's scarily good at the other.

Long meta under the cut, so get comfy.

...

From his role under Edward to the protagonist vs antagonist dynamic setup to his introduction scenes, Izzy is very much invoking the conniving second in command. We know this character from other media. He doesn't have the full power he wants so he's constantly scheming to get it. He can't or won't challenge his boss for some reason, so he settles for being the devil on their shoulder or working behind their back. He's the voice constantly ready to inflame insecurities and turn relationship cracks into chasms, and usually he's lying constantly to do so. His fingerprints are all over his boss's problems up to the moment they show some weakness, and then their loyal second goes right for the backstab. He is THE ambitious manipulator. The shady advisor. The snake.

And then you actually look at Izzy and he is not that guy. In fact, it's a testament to the strength of Edward's character arc how much his evil little henchman is not causing his problems.

So - Izzy and manipulation:

Izzy Can't Convince People To Do Things

Like. He really can't.

This interpersonal struggle is fairly fundamental to his character. And moreover, it's a skill that Izzy is intensely aware that he lacks, so usually he doesn't even try.

In his first episode he walks right up to Buttons and just straight up asks him for the information on his party. He doesn't even resolve to steal the hostages until he realizes that Stede has lost them in the bush already, and Izzy obtains them by buying them. When Stede confronts him they end up splitting the pair in a very above-board negotiation and he pretty much just goes with what Stede suggests.

Then in 1x03, people make a big deal of Izzy "manipulating" Edward by not clarifying that Stede didn't know who he was when he turned down the invite, but kind of importantly he repeats the damning line of the conversation faithfully. If he was going to lie, then why not lie? Why even go see Stede at all? And, if he didn't want Stede dead until after the conversation (understandable, tbh, since "Iggy" was stab-worthy), surely he could invent a better insult to rile Edward up. It makes his omission hit more like being bitchy about Stede not recognizing the obvious - namely that Izzy Hands works for Blackbeard and literally everyone knows this - than a slander campaign to get him killed. And once we properly meet Izzy and Edward in 1x04, Izzy's inability to manipulate becomes his main struggle.

Izzy's a blunt and direct person. He leans on authority bestowed by Blackbeard to take control of situations, playing the role he's supposed to play, and without it he lacks a Plan B. In 1x04 he doesn't have any authority over Edward, so his efforts to get him to take the danger of the Spanish seriously amount to "Well as bored as you might be, if you don't make a decision soon we're gonna fucking die." And this is true! There might be a very subconscious attempt at manipulation in his resignation speech before the "That's Blackbeard. I'm Stede, remember?" line - of the piss him off to get him to get his shit together variety - but Edward literally makes a joke out of it so not exactly effective.

And once Edward stops giving Izzy authority in general, his plan to make Lucius do stuff is still just... brute force. Which works at first when Lucius doesn't realize that Izzy's on his own now, and stops working as soon as Fang breaks ranks. His last ditch blackmail attempt isn't manipulative either - he just plans to tell the truth to Pete and assumes he'll be pissed about it. My guy loses a fight over the pirate equivalent of making an uppity employee clean the coffee maker while the boss is out. Not only does he fail to manipulate the crew in a conniving antagonist way... he doesn't even try.

I mean, the only time he (somewhat) succeeds in talking someone into things is 1x06. Getting Edward to agree to killing Stede isn't really manipulation - Izzy gets Fang and Ivan to back him in a very straightforward way because they all actually do have a stake in this - but he's passably able to push Stede to go through with the fuckery via fake compliments. It's not exactly high level work, though. Stede being vulnerable to ego-stroking / dares is pretty obvious.

So what is Izzy good at?

Well, if you can't make people do anything other than what they were going to do in the first place, you might as well lean into that.

...

Izzy Manipulates Situations, Not People

Situational manipulation is one of those fictional tropes that rarely can happen in real life, but there's not much resemblance because real life rarely gives you all the building blocks for a proper gambit and lets you loose. Too many factors. In narratives, though? It becomes one of my favorite ways of having a character be clever.

And before I get into this too much, a really fun sidenote - I think Izzy does situational manipulation more like the way protagonists do it. See, antagonists are usually emotionally and situationally manipulative (ex: provoking the hero to lash out and using it to frame them for a bigger crime), but it's not a good look when your hero drives the target to do something bad and then punishes them for it. So heroes lean on stuff like Batman Gambits - where the lynchpin of the scheme is the target fucking themselves over by behaving completely in character. They've written Izzy so ineffective at emotional manipulation that he pretty much has to rely on other characters' flaws or histories to cause problems, which has a very similar result. And it's wild.

...

Going back to the 1x03 confrontation in Jackie's bar, Izzy doesn't really do anything abnormal in how he conducts himself, but people are picking up on an agenda for a reason. Namely, the whole damn conversation quickly turns into a trap, and Izzy fully sits back and watches Stede spring it from sheer idiocy.

There's no indication that when Izzy walked up he wasn't going to carry out his task with all the bitchy professionalism expected of him, while probably hoping that Stede would eventually stick his foot in his mouth without Izzy's help (assuming he's the kind of idiot Izzy thinks he is). His first section of this conversation is nearly polite:

Izzy (about the Nose Jar): "I have a few colleagues in there." Stede: "Ugh. You again." Geraldo: "Mr. Hands, welcome. It's been a while." Izzy: "(To Geraldo) Yeah, because I hate this fucking place. (To Stede) But for some inexplicable reason, my boss would like a word with you. Bonnet."

It's not until Stede starts talking that I think Izzy clues in that Stede doesn't actually know who his boss is. He didn't introduce himself until the literal last second of their 1x02 interaction, so it wasn't obvious Stede wasn't literally bolting into the forest in horrified realization.

And Stede? He goes hard on being a bitch right out the gate. Brushes Izzy off, tells him to "get in line", calls him the wrong name, says he doesn't care who Izzy is...

Izzy so far has met Stede in a public place, in front of people who clearly treat Izzy with respect and fear. He doesn't bring up their previous interaction, Stede does. He doesn't even goad Stede beyond existing. He corrects him on his name, and watches it not register in the slightest. The next line is the clincher:

Izzy (slightly incredulous): "So I'll tell my Captain that you're declining then, yeah?"

As Izzy is speaking the conversation becomes a trap - he chooses a reasonable way to refer to Edward that isn't "Blackbeard" and waits to see if Stede will make this worse. The jump from "no I'm busy" to "tell him he has terrible taste in flunkies and he can go suck eggs in Hell" is all Stede, completely ignoring context clues as Geraldo stares on in horror. Hell, Jackie only refrains from later de-nosing Stede on the spot because Geraldo knows what's up, and Stede still doesn't pick up on the fact he should maybe be asking some questions (though I'll give him the knife was distracting).

Izzy returns to the ship, quotes Stede directly for his damning line, and waits to see what Edward will do with it. It's not good behavior on his part (and if he could have seen the future he might have tried worse), but switching mid-conversation to offering Stede an opportunity to fuck himself over is a very different mindset than simply lying to / provoking Stede or Edward to get what he wants. He's mostly being petty.

Stede did insult Edward of his own volition, after all, and just because Izzy fudges the truth to hide he didn't know he was insulting Blackbeard instead of just Izzy and a random stranger doesn't change that. All Izzy did to "escalate" that conversation was give Stede a second opening to do so himself.

But there is a far better example of Izzy masterfully manipulating a situation than this in-the-moment bit of pettiness, so let's move onto my favorite bit... explaining in extensive and slightly awestruck detail why the Navy plot. Fucking. Rules. Because it does. Ready?

...

How to Mastermind the Decisive Removal of One Stupid Fucking Stede Bonnet Over Drinks

Ahem. The Navy plot. Masterclass in intimate betrayal. Izzy's biggest escalation in the total collapse of Edward and Izzy's relationship, but also a completely fucking fascinating glimpse into whatever tangled web of codependency they've got going on, because Edward isn't even mad after 1x09. This wordcount is going to be insane enough without me getting into the Blackhands relationship connotations, so I will... attempt... to stick to breaking down the actual scheme.

And what a scheme it was.

Let's start at the beginning. Jack showing up to lure them into the trap at the start of 1x08? Nope, earlier. Izzy getting kicked off the ship and going to Jackie at the end of 1x06? Further back. Edward proposing the "kill Stede" plan at the end of 1x04, which is the domino that starts all this, right? Closer, but still no.

Izzy's first appearance on screen is in episode 1x02, and that episode is where the seeds of the Navy plot are first planted. See, during Stede's confrontation with Izzy, both of the hostages chime in:

Hostage 1 (Wellington): "Believe him, he's quite insane." Hostage 2 (Hornberry): "He does have the eyes of a madman. Sorry, you do."

Wellington says his line in a tone of voice that clearly indicates a story to tell, and it should also be noted that he is the same one who earlier jumped at the chance to tell the tribe chief about Stede murdering their captain - Nigel. And he's the one that Izzy leaves with, in a sour mood and wanting information about this "Stede Bonnet" character.

When Izzy later reaches out to the Navy, it's no coincidence that he finds Chauncey. He's known since right after their first meeting that Stede was directly responsible for the murder of an Admiral's brother and that the English Navy would know soon enough, since he was literally about to ransom a hostage back to them who would tell the story. And he filed that information away until it was useful or relevant like a clever pirate should.

Moving on to Jackie's bar in 1x03, Izzy gets more potentially useful observations / inspiration. Jackie is actually the first person in the series to make a deal with a naval power. Izzy and crew track the Revenge to the Spanish warship, which means they must see Geraldo sold out Stede to them. Izzy isn't stupid. He knows Geraldo and Spanish Jackie, knows that she's the brains and brawn behind this deal, and has seen enough of Stede that he'd absolutely believe that he did something to get Jackie pissed enough to plot his murder. File away Jackie wants Stede dead and details of how she nearly succeeded in offing him for later.

Izzy spends 1x05 up to the fuckery demonstration observing Stede's crew while waiting for Edward to pull the trigger. I definitely want to note the scene where they interrogate the Frenchman at the beginning of 1x05, because Izzy is staring directly at Stede as he leans away from Edward threatening violence (we know this will later be in his love montage so not actually a turn off, lol, but like... it looked like one). His opinion of the crew is that they like to fuck around without structure (1x05 during the party), probably that they enjoy more standard pirate levels of violence (not shown directly since they are kept out of the 1x05 raid, but fairly obvious), and that they are really easily awestruck by the chance to hear "real pirates" tell charismatic stories (1x06 ghost story).

Any of that sounding like someone we know?

And now to go back to Izzy in 1x06, when he gets sick of Edward being cagey about the plan to kill Stede and decides to "make" him stop stalling, he's straightforward again. Getting Ivan and Fang to back him isn't emotionally manipulative, but it does give him weight in the conversation. They are the ones who bring up the whole "love of a pet makes a man weak" thing, and they do it in the context of calling out hypocrisy. Izzy knows the standards Edward holds his crew to. He lets them convince Edward it's time.

Taking the chance to suggest Stede try a fuckery is a strong blend of situational and emotional manipulation, and later challenging him to a formal duel knowing he'd be overconfident enough to accept is more situational again. Even the terms of the duel are designed to take advantage of the situation. And then Izzy loses in the most comedy way possible, Edward lets him get banished, and Izzy decides that if he was ok with just sending Stede Bonnet on his way to fuck-off before... he's fucking gonna kill him now.

My guy is not a creative thinker, but he's definitely a logistical one. And as he rows away from that ship, all the pieces fall into place.

First, Spanish Jackie. Who listens to him bemoan his relationship woes because she likes him (Izzy gets Jackie in the divorce). Who wants Stede dead and has the clout to summon and deal with a distasteful ally - Chauncey. Together, they concoct an arrangement where a trap will be set and Chauncey gets Stede and only Stede. This isn't a tip-off or a free-for-all. Stede comes from Chauncey's world and they are sending him back. Permanently.

Then it's time for the trap itself, which needs to do two things: get the Revenge somewhere that Chauncey can corner it, and get Edward out of there. And Izzy? Izzy knows Edward. Knows there's one particular person in his past that will have no trouble integrating with the crew, getting Edward to act more like a pirate than a gentleman, and who happens to have a great ambush location on hand.

I've said this before but I'm gonna say it again - I don't think outside characters realize how hard and fast Edward is falling for Stede. The BlackBonnet bonding moments happen almost exclusively when they are alone. The place Izzy dramatically fails to manipulate the situation is not having the evidence he would need to predict Edward going back for Stede. He (and Jack) both think that a precise wedge between BlackBonnet - one that Jack delivers near flawlessly by playing into real issues - will be enough to remind Edward that Stede isn't his people. This isn't a plan to murder the love of Edward's life while his back is turned. It's a plan to get rid of Stede, and remind Edward why he was on board with doing that in the first place. "That's fair," Izzy says about a punch to the face.

Instead, Izzy's plot accidentally backs Edward into a corner and forces him to publicly pull a grand-gesture relationship level-up that he was not emotionally ready for, and the fallout from that explosion is way worse than any of our conspirators were counting on.

Still... you gotta admit. It was a really good plan.

[jqmalikhsgib]

quest

ten

feeling someone try and climb into the bed woke you up. you looked down and smiled when you see your shy boy. laughing you look down before picking him up gently.

“hi, baby. what are you doing up so early?”

he just cuddles you before trying to grab his fathers hand. aaron grunts as he gently opens his eyes and smiles.

it had been a few weeks since your first appointment at marriage counseling. the two of you have become a little bit stronger. you were both still trying to navigate your relationship.

aaron’s been more attentive. he’s also taken time off. letting derek and dave handle everything unless he was extremely needed.

“good morning, theo. how’s my boy?”

“papa, sleepy?”

aaron chuckles. “not too sleepy for you. hungry baby?”

theo nods.

“ill go make breakfast.” you were about to get outta bed before aaron stops you. “ill make breakfast. you and the kids relax.”

“aaron—”

aaron shakes his head. he kissed you gently before getting out of bed and heading downstairs. currently you were packing. finding a house big enough for your family.

you and aaron had money, sure. with aaron growing up wealthy his father left him, his mother, and his brother quite a lot of money. aaron’s grandparents did the exact same. leaving them to never have to worry about anything.

you on the other hand had just come from money. receiving everything that your father left behind. including the house back in texas. but he also had homes all around the world, including a home near quantico.

it’s already been paid off and it has nine bedrooms. big enough for everyone to have there own room and possibly even have more children, which is something aaron needed to discuss with you in the near future.

once aaron finished making breakfast he ran upstairs and smiles when he sees you cuddled up to all your children. he loved having his family back together. even more so having three new children the two of you created together.

his family

though he thinks a lot about the woman that’s missing, haley. she should be here. alive and well. she would have loved theo, izzy, and roe. so much so she would have offered to take them along with jack even if they weren’t hers biologically.

not because she didn’t think you couldn’t handle it. but to give you a little break to yourself. she would have given you pointers and you would have taken them. the two of you would probably be closer than before. bonding over the love you have for the children in your lives.

haley loved you so much. you were a huge part of jack’s life. she loved how much you loved her son. in fact the day she died she told aaron to find you. to not let jack lose two moms.

“daddy!” isabella yelled when she spots her dad in the doorway.

the rest of his family looks at him lovingly. he climbs into bed and kisses his kids.

“good morning. breakfast is ready.”

jack was the first one downstairs. he was very hungry. you and aaron laugh as you grab the triplets and head downstairs.

you all enjoyed breakfast together. laughing and giggling. the day was starting off perfect. what you didn’t know was aaron had made plans for you two. he wanted to take you out without the kids.

normally when you go out the kids are around. but he had called both jessica and jj to come and take care of your four children. hoping jj was free the whole day so jessica didn’t have to take care of four children alone, though she had stated plenty of times that she was more than happy to and was more than capable. he just didn’t want to overwhelm her.

with jj having two kids, and one more on the way, he thought having her around to help would be great for jessica.

“jack?”

“yea dad?”

“could you take your siblings to the play room while mom and i clean this up?”

jack nods. he grabs his siblings as he heads the the play area.

“what was that about?”

aaron holds your hand.

“just—we don’t ever get any alone time.”

you scoff playfully. “we have four children, aaron. hard to get that.”

“i know. but if we’re gonna do this, restart everything, we should probably have more time to ourselves, don’t you think?”

“what do you suggest?”

aaron smiles. he kisses the top of your head before he continues to the dishes. you eye him suspiciously.

“what are you up to mister hotchner?”

aaron smirks. “it’s a surprise misses hotchner.”

no matter how many times you hear it your heart skips a beat. being called misses hotchner has always made you feel giddy.

“fine, don’t tell me.”

he chuckles while you help him finish up the dishes.

that night, after a grocery store run, without the kids because aaron insisted they stay with him while you have a little break, when you got home it was quiet.

it made you nervous. you hadn’t been use to the silence in so long.

“aaron?”

when you got no word from him you immediately locked the door and called him.

“hotchner?”

“aaron, where are you?”

“go upstairs.”

you frowned. heading upstairs you walked into your shared bedroom and seen the most beautiful silver dress you had ever seen. you runs your fingers over it.

“do you like it?”

“aaron! it’s beautiful.”

“you better get dressed, angel. we got a date tonight. just you and i.”

“what about the kids?”

“jessica and jj are watching them while i take my lovely wife out on a date she deserves. we got two years to make up for. im gonna make up for it in one night.”

you giggle. “okay, big boy. don’t get ahead of yourself.”

aaron just chuckles. “get dressed and meet me at our favorite spot. you still remember don’t you?”

“of course.”

“see you soon, misses hotchner.”

the line soon goes dead. you squeal like a teenager finally going on her first date with the guy she’s been crushing on for years before getting ready.

when you arrived at your favorite restaurant, the same one aaron proposed, you saw eyes on you. granted you looked like a movie star, you were still very shy.

when aaron sees you he couldn’t keep his eyes off. it was like your first date all over again.

“wow.”

“is it too much?”

aaron shakes his head. “absolutely not. you look breathtaking. everything about you is just—im one lucky man, huh?”

“im one lucky woman. look at you. the glasses are—”

“yeah? this doing it for you?” he laughs.

“absolutely.”

the two of you sit across from each other. aaron had already ordered a bottle of wine.

“i figured white wine would do. unless you want red, darling.”

you shook your head. “this is just fine. thank you.”

the two of you continue to have conversation. talking about the kids and the big move. aaron even discussed work. how a lot of cases were hard but others he took home with him. you listened intensely. once the two of you ordered he begins talking about the time you were gone.

it upset you at how much you missed. in aaron’s life and in jacks. but he kept letting you know that it was passed. the two of you should focus on the new beginnings of your lives and still be able to enjoy the stories you get to tell each other when being apart

when your food arrived you continued to catch up. it was like a new start. it felt good to talk to aaron again. not that you haven’t since being back. but it was always someone around. rather that be your therapist or your children. now you get alone time to just chat.

“how was the team? during everything?”

“they were tip-toying around me. trying to tread lightly. making sure i didn’t get upset or triggered.”

“im sorry you had to go through that. i should have—”

“hey, stop! remember.”

you hummed. “i know. just feel guilty.”

“well you shouldn’t. we both made mistakes. we talk about it every week. no need to talk about it here, with each other. we’re okay.” aaron smiles as he grabs your hand gently. he kisses the back of it to get you to smile gently.

aaron has always been affectionate. but recently it was different. though he kiss you on the cheek, forehead, behind your ear or hand the two of you never actually kissed each other on the mouth.

you weren’t in any rush. but you felt like he was hiding something. you weren’t a profiler but you knew your husband. you were giving him time to completely open up to you. hopefully he would eventually.

when you both hear his phone ring he frowns. he was still using his vacation time. when he sees it’s jj he panics a little.

“jj? are the kids okay?”

this made your heart beat. hoping that your children were safe. aaron’s usual scowl back in tune.

“yes, i understand. ill be right there.” he ended the call and sighs.

“im so sorry, yn. it’s a case involving a boy. he’s a little bit older than jack. i gotta—”

your heart broke just hearing that. you couldn’t imagine what the parents were going through. if something happened to jack or any of your babies you don’t think you’d be able to handle it.

“no, don’t apologize. go!”

“thank you.” he kisses the top of your head. he goes to pay the bill before you head out yourself. suddenly needing to just hug and kiss your babies.

sorry ive been gone for a little while. dealing with family drama kinda sucks the soul out of writing! but im back with a new part

yes i changed the title again. wasn’t really feeling like doing the whole song title anymore

please let me know if you wanna be added or unadded to any of my stories taglist!

taglist:

@ivebeenthearchersstuff @shergoretzxx @slut4ethan @rosiehale23 @madesavage05 @whotfskai @vodkori @zaddyhotch @14buddy22

[18catsreading]

Alex/Kingskin: as we're leaving, is Doug still by the door, or has he --

Brennan: Doug is still by the door as you walk out.

Alex/Kingskin: i whisper to him, pull a car near the station downtown. We'll see you in a bit.

Brennan/Doug: you got it. [As Bennan]: you see as he looks at you, he also looks at you Usha and goes

[as Doug]: hey, can i have a hug goodbye?

Rehka/Usha/G13: i don't hug

Ally: oh my fucking god!

Brennan/Doug: okay [as Brennan]: he waoks away

Alex/Kingskin: hey, wait, hey

Izzy: [unintelligible] with something?

Alex/Kingskin: i do a side hug for Doug

Brennan: yea, he gives you a little thing. He goes [as Doug]: that hurt so bad.

Alex/Kingskin: hey don't take it personal. Don't take it personal.

Brennan/Doug: that hurt so bad

Alex/Kingskin: he's going through something

Jacob: it's probably like a handoff situation

Rehka: oh he's going to hug me to slip me something helpful?

Ally: that's the vibe I got

Jacob: or take something that we don't want missing

Rehka: got it. Should i do that?

Jacob: its too late

Ify: too late

Ally: i think you have to make out with him now. Now he's insulted.

Brennan: yeah

Rehka: i didn't read the cues. The incel vibe is taking over.

Jacob: i think that's fair

Ally: i think you're allowed to do whatever you want and there's no wrong answer

Jacob: you made the right choice and i'm sorry to make you doubt that.

Ally: yeah, same

Jacob: i apologize

Rehka: can i try to call him back and give him these items?

Brennan: You're just right there, it took three seconds, the whole interaction, so you're still right there.

Rehka: give him what?

Jacob: your call. I shouldn't have put that on you.

Rehka: no!

Jacob: i apologize

Ally: i screamed "oh my fucking god" afterwards, and i'm not proud of that, because i really respect you as a player.

Ify: i don't like the decision.

Jacob: silent!

Rehka: okay! Okay!

Ally: and the adventuring party starts now!

Rehka: okay, okay.

Ally: no, you're an incel. Someone's like "can i have a hug" and you're like -

Rehka: but you know what?

Jacob: don't hug me

Rehka: what about --

Alex: no

Rehka: a firm handshake?

Brennan/Doug: who are you, my dad?

Rehka: makes this amazing confused/derisive face

Brennan/Doug: face crumples into the saddest fucking expression ever

Jacob: fuck, Doug, no!

Rehka: G13 has one moment where he thinks about it --

Jacob: no, Doug!

Alex: Doug!

Brennan/Doug: we just weren't a hug house.

Izzy: fuck, Doug.

Ally: if this ends up just being a hug, Brennan.

Brennan: face twitches, almost loses it, continues to look super fucking sad

Ally: Brennan! If this ends up just being a hug for Doug,

Brennan: makes a reallllly coquettish expression and does his cute hands pose to peace signs

Ally: and i've done this to Rehka, my friend

Brennan: cute uwu shrug

Rehka: because Usha is not full incel yet --

Brennan: yea

Ally: you're gonna make it just a hug! I can feel it!

Rehka: she gets these cues from her friends that are like, these items might go missing

Brennan: shrugs mischievously at Ally

Rehka/Usha/G13: i'm too thin, i don't have enough ass cheek to hide this in my ass or anything

Alex/Kingskin: i now don't think we can trust Doug. Doug's being weird.

Rehka/Usha/G13: you're giving me brain melt. He gives you a very firm, firm handshake, and slips these items to you.

Alex: oy vey

Izzy: fuck me

Brennan: holds up the box of doom. Call evens or odds.

Rehka: evens [rolls a 12]

Brennan/Doug: hell yea, boss. With my family, it was never just a hug.

Alex: what does that mean?

Rehka/Usha/G13: that means that his family always had hugs that involved slipping information. G13 does look at Doug, this flash it realizing what it does look like for someone to not have outside works connections. Its not quite dawning on him yet because Usha is kind of becoming G13. But there's a flash of it.

Brennan: as you hand this away, Doug, who you see is basically not being handled by the FBI, he is just sort of being shunted off to the local police who you think Doug can probably handle. He takes this, slides it in. You no longer have your MacGuffin.

A light on the table goes from green to red. 🚨

[garbinge]

Library Daycare (2)

Angel Reyes x OC Isabeth ‘Izzy’ Flores 30 Day Fic Challenge (14/30)

Word Count: 3k A/N: I feel like I say this for a majority of my fics but this post-canon world I've thought up for Angel and Maverick is my favorite, I think about it everyday, I just, want him to be happy even tho most of my ideas for this are angsty HAHA.

Warnings: All my fics are 18+ regardless of content. Light angst.

Mayans Taglist: @drabbles-mc @justreblogginfics @narcolini @danzer8705 @keyweegirlie @kmc1989 Previous fic for reference.

Angel stepped into the library, Maverick in his arms and was staring at the bulletin board. His eyes were scanning over each flyer and business card that was pinned to it. The list of jobs that Angel felt capable of was slim. There were a lot of options, prep cook, lab assistant, front desk organizer, medical assistants, nurses, but none of those were things that Angel had any experience with. That’s when his eyes landed on the business card that was pinned to the flyer that said Farm Hand needed, the business card on top reading Rancho de Valle - Este. His free hand reached up to grab the information from the pin so he could get a closer look. 

Farm hand, operating and maintaining machinery, harvesting and planting crops, repairs, occasional livestock caring. Full time, housing on premise provided if desired, hourly pay, overtime opportunities, and medical insurance. 

“El Ranchitos.” A voice sounded behind him. 

He turned around immediately, a little startled by the voice while Maverick on the other hand cooed in excitement as he saw who was behind them. 

“Sorry I did not mean to scare you.” Izzy smiled at Angel and turned her gaze onto Maverick. Her hand quickly reached out to grab his foot. “Hi, you. I missed you.” Her voice was soft now, she didn’t want to scary anyone again. 

“You caught me deep in thought, that’s all.” Angel laughed as he adjusted Maverick in his arms. 

“Yes, El Ranchitos.” She repeated again pointing to the papers again. 

Angel looked down not seeing El Ranchitos anywhere on the forms and looked back at the woman he had brief conversations with over the last few months. “You’re familiar with them?” 

“De Valle’s are very well known in this town. They own all of El Ranchitos, de Valle Este is the one closest to the city that is a harvesting ranch, they have others in the city but they’re more like resorts, they had to adapt with the change of the world.” Izzy explained. “They’re good people, kind, understanding. I think de Valle Este is like 10 minutes from here by car.” 

“Thanks, yea I think I’m going to apply. Everything else is a bit out of my range.” Angel laughed awkwardly. “Just gotta figure out what I’m gonna do with him while I’m working, maybe I could hire someone to watch him if I take them up on this on premise housing.” He was thinking outloud now, but it was just a symptom of having no one above the age of 2 to talk with here. 

Izzy was leaning over in front of him now, reaching for something on the bulletin board. Her hand began searching around until she found what she was looking for and pulled it from the pin. “It isn’t a nanny, but we watch the kids all day, feed them, read to them, use the playground outside on good weather days, it’s a small group too.” 

“We?” Angel questioned his eyes moving from the library daycare flier to Izzy’s face.

“Okay, I, it’s my initiative. We did a trial run this summer with a handful of kids and it went pretty well. We have about 8 kids right now signed up for the school year, all local, have room for 10, I think Maverick would be a great addition.” Izzy grinned again, now looking at Maverick who giggled and brought his hands out to her in hope to be held by her. 

“How was I around like all summer and didn’t notice this?” Angel laughed and happily gave the child over to Izzy. 

These last few months he had gotten extremely comfortable with the woman and honestly safe with her, Angel as well. These last few months have consisted of Angel coming to most of the library events because not only did Maverick enjoy them but because they offered him peace around people which he didn’t have much of since leaving Santo Padre. There was a constant fear, a persistence to always look over his shoulder, double guess everyone he met, everyone who walked too close to him on the street, but at the library it was like that fear was nonexistent. He had made a friend in Izzy, which was exactly what he needed right now. 

“I have two other people that help out, it allows one of us to take off, or be more flexible around the library.” She answered as she bounced Maverick up and down in her arms. “They’re actually running daycare now, if you want to check it out.” Her eyes moved back to Angel as Maverick’s little hands picked up her I.D. that was draped around her neck with a lanyard. “No pressure.” She let out an awkward laugh. 

“No, yea.” Angel spoke up which earned him a confused look from the woman holding his child across from him. He smiled realizing how confusing his statement was. “I just meant we’d love to check it out.” 

Izzy nodded and brought them both to the children’s area of the library and opened up the decent size circular room that currently had a group of kids of a variety of ages drawing on tables. 

“Sticker drawing. Helps them with open ended exploration, we let the older kids come up with a story based on their drawings and the younger ones like it too.” She was placing Maverick down on the ground and he was quick to find himself at the small table grabbing a sheet of his own. 

“How big is the age range?” Angel wasn’t sure why he was asking questions, he knew this was the best place for Maverick if he was to get this job. 

“Right now 1 through 5. This group is a bit older because it’s the summer.” She put her hands over her chest as she watched over the kids. 

 Before Angel could answer there was a little girl who was about 4 walking up to Izzy holding out her sheet of paper towards her. 

“Wow, that’s beautiful.” The little girl was being brought up into her arms and instantly throwing her own around Izzy’s neck. 

“Well the kids sure love you.” Angel smiled. 

“I hope this one does.” Izzy rocked from side to side similarly to how she was with Maverick just minutes earlier, but this time she looked at the girl in her arms and kissed the side of her head. “This one’s mine.” 

Angel found himself at a loss of words at that statement. He didn’t expect it. It automatically made him think about his friendship with Izzy, this was something huge that she so easily went without mentioning. Then again, it wasn’t like she knew everything about his life, but she knew a lot about his current life, and this felt very much like her current life. Between not knowing about the daycare and now her child, he felt like he needed to take a major step back. 

“Are you okay?” She interrupted Angel’s thoughts. 

“Yea, sorry. Just didn’t realize you had a kid.” Angel wanted to rewind the last 10 seconds so he never said those words. 

Izzy’s face dropped a little and she looked back down at her daughter and placed her back on the ground and stayed at her level for a moment. “Go back with your friends, Abrielle.” 

As she stood up she turned to Angel, and nodded towards the door. For a moment he hesitated and looked at Maverick. “You can take him, but Olivia doesn’t mind watching him.” She pointed to the woman with the lanyard similar to her own that was at the smaller kids table. With a nod, Angel was walking out of the room and standing awkwardly in front of Izzy. 

“I know you understand the need for privacy, Angel. The need to keep things to yourself. If I recall the first time I met you, I put my own address in for your library card because you were two nervous to give out information.” It felt scolding almost the way she was speaking. 

“I–” Angel went to speak but she cut him off by holding up her finger and speaking over him. 

“I don’t need a reason to make a choice regarding my child, Angel.” Her accent came out strong when she said his name. “You out of all people should get that.” 

“I do, I’m sorry. I just thought we were friends.” Again, Angel was wishing he would just keep his mouth shut. 

Izzy sighed, her guard immediately falling down and with a shake of her head she spoke. “We are friends, Angel. I just need to be cautious with her.” 

“I get that.” He nodded. “I didn’t mean to do whatever this is.” He waved his hand around and laughed awkwardly. “If anything, I’m glad you felt comfortable to tell me, it’s cool, having a parent friend. Haven’t had many of those really.” 

“Well if you do the daycare thing, you’ll make more during pickup and dropoff.” She matched his humorous tone. 

“Don’t know if I want that.” He chuckled nervously.

“Why do you think I don’t tell many people I have a child.” Her eyebrows raised and her mouth curled into a smile. 

Angel laughed. “Well then I’m honored to be accepted amongst the few.” He looked through the window of the daycare door and saw Maverick laughing at something and he turned back to Izzy. “I’d like to sign him up, even if I don’t get this job, this is the right place for him.” 

Izzy smiled at that comment, she went to say something but bit her tongue immediately. Her desire to say that this is the best place for Maverick and him was high but she held back and simply nodded. 

“Let’s get you two signed up then.” 

[bullet-prooflove]

Stockton!Series Part Six: Times Are Changing - Nestor Oceteva x Reader (feat: Bishop Losa & Marcus Alvarez)

Tagging: @anime-weeb-4-life @danzer8705 @drabbles-mc @alwaysachorusgirl @witches-unruly-heart @mysoulisasunflower @im-just-a-mississippi-girl @est1887 @mortal--soul @buddinglinguist @spookyboogyuniverse @thanossexual @lexondeck @weiwei0210 @trublu2u @justreblogginfics @oklahomapeach @keyweegirlie @crazy4chickennuggets @kmc1989 @withakindheartx @fanfic-n-tabulous @beardedbarba @adaydreamaway08 @librarian1002 @kishie8 @saltyunicorn079 @thebaileybugle @spaghettificationandpretzels @nu1freakshow @doggirlforever @beccabarba @legally-a-bastard @wnbweasley @skyesthebomb @msjava1972 @trublu2u @fleureeee @jp1019 @thiashazzywriting @jeybae @collegegirl83

Stockton!Series:

Part One: El Cuchillo - An incident in the clubhouse causes ramifcations for the entire club.

Part Two: Always - Nestor learns about what happened.

Part Three: In the Dark - You and Nestor wake up to find armed men in your house.

Part Four: Sierra - Marcus takes care of the men who tried to kill you.

Part Five: Maternal - Nestor and you take refuge at a familiar location.

It’s past midnight and Marcus sits alone in Templo. He’s taken the seat at the head of the table, his fingertips flicking through ‘The Good Book’, the one that Marcus had created when he founded the club all those years ago. Their history, their rules, their legacy, it’s all contained within these pages.

It’s been horrible couple of days, for him, for the MC, for his family, because that’s what you are to him, family. His daughter, born of fire and blood, the one that Ramos had tried to murder in her sleep, all over a grudge from something that happened when you were a child. Something you have no knowledge of, that’s he’s determined you’ll never have any knowledge of.

This book it plays a part in that.

As he reads it, he recognises the ramblings of the angry, violent man he used to be. The monster he calls it now, when he talks to Izzy.

He raises his head as Bishop enters through the stained-glass door. In each of his hands he holds a mug of coffee, the real stuff. Marcus would know that aromatic scent anywhere, it’s the same brand he keeps in his house. He sets one of the mugs in front of Marcus before he takes up residence in the V.P’s seat.

“Hell of a day.” Bishop says rubbing his hands over his weary features.

“Yea.” Marcus says as he picks up his coffee cup and takes a sip. “I’m just hoping they got the message otherwise things are about to get real fucked up.”

“Stockton was already fucked up. Things will change now Ramos is gone.” Bishop assures the other man. “Smokey’s tough, he’ll rein them in and the ones that don’t fall into line…I won’t shed any tears for them.”

Marcus shakes his head.

“I won’t either.”

There’s silence between the two of them for a moment, each man lost in his own thoughts. It shouldn’t have come down to this, they should have dealt with this problem long before Ramos had ever laid eyes on you.

“I haven’t seen that for a while.” Bishop utters, gesturing towards the book.

Marcus sighs heavily.

“Probably for good reason.” Marcus says before he turns the book towards Bishop.

The other man studies the words before shaking his head.

“It was a different time back then.” Bishop says, removing the cigarettes from inside of his kutte. He taps the box upon the table before removing one and placing it between his lips.

“We talk about women as if their property, something to be owned, to be traded when we get tired of them.” Marcus jabs his finger at the paper. “This book tells us their only good for sex or serving, it doesn’t talk about love or respect. Is it any wonder that charters like Stockton act the way they do when these are the values, we’ve instilled in them?”

Bishop lights up his cigarette, he takes a drag.

“The world is changing El Padrino. We have to adapt.” Bishop says as he taps the ash off the end of cigarette. “We care about our women here; we cherish them but other charters… It needs to be a message that goes out across the club. What happened the other day can’t be allowed to happen again, not to anyone. There needs to be repercussions for that type of shit.”

Marcus nods his agreement, his hands wrapping the mug.

“I’m proud of that you’ve done here primo, legitimising the MC, supporting the community.” He tells Bishop earnestly. “This charter’s become more than I could have dreamed of.”

“And all it took was for me to pull my head out of my ass.” Bishop remarks before he takes another drag on the cigarette as he watches Marcus withdraw an A6 notebook from the interior pocket of his kutte. He pushes it towards the other man with his fingertips.

“This is what I’ve put together, a revised edition of the by-laws.” Marcus tells Bishop before he drains the rest of his coffee.

Bishop reviews the changes before tapping his fingertip upon the paper and raising his eyes to meet Marcus’s.

“We need to talk about Taza.”

Marcus clasps his hands together, his lips pursing into a grim line.

“We have to lead by example El Padrino,” Bishop tells him, his voice gruff as he stubs out his cigarette. “He has suffered for so long under the weight of this secret, putting the club before himself over and over again. I can’t help but wonder how many other Tazas are out there, how many other brothers are struggling with something just like this and what happens to the ones that aren’t as strong as him.”

Marcus knows what he’s talking about, the suicides that leave no notes, the members that are quietly taken care of for an infraction that can’t be discussed.

“We have to do better.” Bishop tells him, picking up the cigarette box and tapping it upon the surface of the table.  “Every single one of us deserves to love who we love and not be punished for it.”

“You’re right.” Marcus says finally, picking up his pen and adding the amendment. “I’ll get this drawn up and sent out to the other charters.”

Marcus raises to his feet, tucking the notebook back into his kutte. His hand comes to rest upon Bishop’s shoulder, clasping it tightly.

“You’ve been leading the way for a while now, primo. It’s time for the other charters to get in line and follow.”

Love Nestor? Get added to his tag list!

Like My Work? - Why Not Buy Me A Coffee

[dawnrider]

OTP Prompt Challenge request:

9. Morning Routine: InuKag

(I’d love to read some fluffy, domestic married Inukag morning routine bliss, but please write if/ as you feel so inspired ❤️)

Hello @xanthippe-writes ! Thanks for the prompt from this list.

This felt like it fit into my Bushel and a Peck universe so have some domestic morning routine. While not blissful, per se, it's fluffy and happy. And hopefully a bit real...

Fancy Cheese and Size Threes

“Don’t forget to grab diapers,” Kagome called from Sara’s room, the sounds of an angry baby not wanting their diaper changed following her words.

Inuyasha rolled his eyes in the mirror as his toothbrush hung out of the side of his mouth. He was trying to simultaneously wrangle curls into pigtails – Izzy’s current style of choice – and brush his own teeth while not dribbling on his shirt. “There,” he declared with a sigh, tugging on each one to pull them tight. “Go get your bag and your sweater.” Grasping the handle of his toothbrush, he got back to brushing.

“But I’m not cooooold,” Izayoi whined. Inuyasha paused in his brushing and gave his daughter a sharp look in the reflection of the mirror. She pouted, then turned on her heel to do as asked. He heard his wife cooing to Sara in order to distract her while trying to dress her. She’d hit the stage where she hated being changed in any capacity and tried to escape the changing table while you fought leggings onto her chunky little legs. “Daddy! I can’t find my sweater!”

“Nice try, pup. It’s on the chair,” he called back, spitting out the last of his toothpaste.

“Oh.”

“Uh huh.” He stepped out of the bathroom just in time to be handed an armful of squirming baby. “Well good morning to you too,” he muttered, dropping a kiss on top of her head. She squealed angrily at being restrained, little arms flailing.

“Here,” Kagome murmured. Her fingers swiped something from his face, then grabbed a towel just inside the door. “Toothpaste,” she clarified with a grin when he gave her a confused look. He sighed dramatically, then chuckled when she went up on her toes to place a kiss on his cheek. “Diapers.”

“I heard you the first time.” Inuyasha adjusted Sara in his hold to keep her from climbing over his shoulder. “She still in a size three?” Kagome nodded as she pulled socks from the top drawer and tried to balance on one foot to put each of them on before giving up and plopping onto the floor. “Anything else we need? The C word?” he whispered the last, glancing toward the doorway. Izayoi was in her room, presumably struggling her way into her sweater based on the sounds she was making.

Kagome grinned wryly. “Probably not a bad idea. Just don’t get the soft kind. She doesn’t like those anymore.” He nodded. No string cheese, only the sticks. Got it. “Can you grab a bottle of wine too?” He knew if he asked her what kind she would say anything was fine, but he would end up grabbing two and hope one of them was serviceable.

“I’ll even get us some of the fancy stuff and the you-know-whats you like.”

Kagome’s eyes glowed. “Can we watch that movie I’ve had saved for later?” Inuyasha pretended to hate the idea, but nodded anyway, a sly smile lifting his lips. Fancy cheese and cracker night was a long-standing tradition. Especially now with both girls, they rarely got the chance to get out for an actual date night, so an old romance adventure movie on the couch with “fancy” grocery store cheese and crackers was about as much of a date night as they could reasonably expect.

“Am I gonna be late, Daddy?” Izayoi called from her room. She had only minimal understanding of the clock, but knew that time was a factor in their day. Inuyasha glanced at his watch and swore under his breath. “That’s a bad word!” Izayoi scolded, sounding scandalized.

“Yea, yea. Just don’t repeat it. Bye. I love you,” he murmured, kissing Sara’s squishy cheek and handing her to Kagome. “You too.”

Kagome grinned as he pressed a kiss to her lips, snatching his collar for a moment to keep him there. “Love you. Fancy date night.”

“And diapers. I know.” He grinned, kissing her one last time, then went to scoop up the four year old. Despite her protests, she’d put on her sweater and had her little backpack strapped on her back, the clip done in front. “You’re gonna have to take that off in the car, you know.”

“I know. I don’t wanna lose it!”

“Kid, that would be some kinda skill to lose your bag between here and the car,” he said with a chuckle. Despite his teasing, he wouldn’t put it past her to set it down somewhere and get distracted. He asked her about what she planned to do at preschool today and she told him elaborately the picture she planned to color and the tower she wanted to build in the block corner because Joey – another hanyou child she seemed to have a love-rivalry relationship with – had knocked over her last one before it was finished.

As he was backing down the driveway, he looked up and spotted Kagome holding Sara, chubby baby hands banging on the window glass and a face that told him she was squealing with laughter.

“Wave bye to your sister.”

“Bye Baby! Bye Mama,” Izayoi called as she waved back. Inuyasha grinned and gave a little wave too, making Sara screech and smack the glass again. Kagome was barely holding in laughter and she wiggled her fingers to say goodbye as well. “Daddy?”

“Yea, pup.”

“When I’m bigger, can I eat fancy cheese too?”

Inuyasha nearly choked, then smothered a laugh so he could look at her seriously in the rearview. “Sure, pup. You can eat fancy cheese when you get older.”

“Good. I wanna know what’s so great about it. You and Mama never share.”

“Trust me, Iz. When you get older, you’ll understand.”

“You alllllways say that.”

“Yup. And it’s pretty much always true.” He shook his head and smiled, seeing the slight pout on her face. “Guess what.” Her ears perked up, her pigtails quivering behind them. “We have to stop at the store on the way home from school later. You want to pick out a treat for you and Sara?”

Her eyes got huge and her mouth dropped open. “Really?!” He nodded. She squealed in excitement, then stopped almost immediately as both their ears flattened at the noise. “Sorry, Daddy.” Inuyasha only reached back behind his seat and patted her leg. She still had a lot to learn about being hanyou, but she was learning, and he couldn’t be more proud.

[artsy-waffle19]

after several hours of processing, a rewatch and some other peoples tumblr posts analyzing the whole situation I actually don't think that izzys death was in it's concept entirely bad (the execution was terrible but I can see where they were coming from) so first of all: the entire ending was rushed, the wedding, stede randomly giving up piracy to open an inn even though they didn't have a conversation about this at all? and yes, izzys death but honestly I blame that on hbo not david jenkins (plus I also refuse to believe that he just didn't care about the character and didn't think about what effect it would have, so far he's done nothing but care about his characters, the fans and izzy in particular he said this season he was super important and he really liked the character)

The thing is that he explained his decision making as "the mentor dying while the student lives on and has to deal with the death of a father figure" now the thing is that I feel like between the 5th and the 6th episode and between izzys death and the ending there's just a huge chunk of plot missing that probably got cut and I personally believe that that part between 5 and 6 was supposed to show ed and izzys relationship more. David said Ed viewed him as a father figure yet we've never seen that before. Every interaction between them has framed them as an abusive (on both sides) romantic relationship (somebody said that their relationship showed the whole daddy issues thing pretty well because it shows ed viewing izzy as literally every kind of relationship a friend, a father, a partner just everything) now that does make sense but we only know that now after david said it not because the show made it visible (which is probably because they didn't have the time (i mean they cut an entire hour of runtime which is like a fifth))

And generally I think if we had seen that father figure-dynamic a little more they actually could've pulled that ending off because then it would've been more apparent what the show was trying to show.

My interpretation of the whole thing is that izzys death symbolises the end of piracy, rather than the death of a character that didn't "deserve living anymore" hear me out:

1) he was the most competent pirate in the entire show, always used as comparison and on several occasions it is showed that he doesn't only teach everyone how to be a pirate but is also the most respected pirate in the republic of pirates. Even when ed isn't recognised anymore, everybody knows who izzy hands is. He is basically THE pirate, the unicorn of piracy.

2) the unicorn plot: when they called him a unicorn for the first time I thought it was just the crew accepting him on the ship and in their family but the term of "the last unicorn" makes much more sense in this context. He's the concept of piracy, the mythical creature and the view everyone has of piracy, yet if he dies, piracy is over the last unicorn is gone and that's pretty much what's happening and what's fully gonna happen next season. him dying is the beginning of the end.

3) ed and stede quitting piracy and staying where izzy is burried, they basically burried piracy to then move on to the land. Also because izzy was a teacher for both of them and was therefore what tied them to real piracy. Especially for ed he symbolised piracy and his past life.

Also izzys thoughts about piracy and ed changed. In the first season he says stede is not a real pirate and neither is ed when he's not blackbeard, in season 2 he says piracy is about belonging somewhere and finding a family he also accepts ed for being ed and tells him to just be himself. with him the concept of piracy changes in itself.

The entire thing also could've been a great deal better if they had actually had the time to show everyone mourning him because they immediately after had a wedding and just moved on but once again that was probably just cut screen time.

I also don't think that they exactly dean winchestered him (i mean yea but also no) he died for the crew, his newfound family ("it's about finding a new family you'd die for when your actual one is already gone") And yea he was already getting his will to live back and taking that from him was awful but he was also fully ready to die for the cause, one he believed in. Because he believed in his family and that piracy and his spirit would live on even if they were all dead because "we are good". So his death wasn't entirely pointless.

messy and long text but over all I think that, even though it is sad and could've been handled better, it isn't a bad ending in it's concept and, even though I wish he would've survived i don't think that the death of this character ruins the entire show or is in any way offensive to queer and disabled people....It's just very poorly executed, which is on hbo for cutting the season short by a fith

[gnrbitch]

Summer Break pt.7 - Fun House

Warnings: Profanity & Smoking

————

Day 9, 1986

Y/n yawned as she stood up from her bed, rubbing her eyes she looked over to Slash’s empty bed.

Her eyebrows scrunched together, weird she thought, I always wake up before Slash.

Her sock covered feet walked out of her room, heading towards the bathroom. She brushed her teeth, washed her face, then brushed her hair. Her usual morning routine.

Walking out the bathroom, she glanced over a clock that was right above the doorway.

2 pm, it read. Her eyes widen. This was the most sleep she’s gotten since the incident. Her thoughts & nightmares keeping her up at night.

Y/n sighed as she stood in the middle of the living room, where was everyone?

And as if the man above could hear her thoughts, everyone came walking through the doorway.

“Hey! you’re finally awake” Slash said as he stared at Y/n, smile on his face.

“Yea” Y/n croaked out, “Where were you guys?” she asked.

“Down at the Roxy, we got a gig tonight” Axl said as he sat on the couch.

“Who plays a gig on a Tuesday night?” Y/n furrowed her eyebrows as she looked at the red head in front of her.

“People who have no life” Izzy sighed

Y/n just pursed her lips as she tried to stop herself from laughing.

She sat next to Axl, then Duff went ahead and sat himself next to her.

“Where’s Mandy?” Y/n asked, thinking about how she hasn’t seen her in a while.

Duff looked over to her, “She’s been working, and she’s been going to this like summer school. Some college shit.”

Y/n just let out a little hum.

“Do you wanna come tonight?” Steven said, smiling at her.

Y/n looked over to Duff, smile on her face “Can Fru come?”

“If he wants” Duff shrugged.

“Okay then, I’ll see”

After a few moments of all of them watching T.V, Slash in the kitchen (probably looking for something to drink). Y/n spoke up.

“Duff” The dark haired girl said, in a hushed tone

“What happened Y/n” Duff looked at her.

“I wanted to ask you if um, if Fru could come over today” She whispered, only so Duff can hear.

Duff raised his eyebrows, “As in here?” he motioned, Y/n just nodded her head.

“Okay. That’s cool.” He nodded, grabbing a pack of cigarettes from his pocket.

Y/n smiled, “Thank Duff”.

The girl got up and headed over to Duffs house phone, dialing Johns number.

“Hello?” The voice said on the other side of the phone.

“Hey Fru” Y/n spoke, hand twirling the phone cable.

“Hey Y/n, I was waiting for you to call” John said as a smile grew on his face.

And as the boys heard who Y/n was calling, all heads turned to Duff.

Axl nudged him, “Is he coming over?”

“Yea he is, try not to give him a hard time.” Duff said as he gave Axl a look.

“Who’s coming over?” Steven asked, in a much louder tone then the boys were speaking.

Duff pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed, “Y/n’s little friend”

“Oh m gee” Steven said as he looked over at Y/n talking on the phone.

“I asked Duff if you could come over” Y/n spoke on the phone.

“Really? what did he say”

“He said yea” Y/n said, turning to face the wall so the boys couldn’t see the smile on her face.

“I’m nervous, what should I wear?” John said

Y/n let out a little laugh “Jesus Fru don’t freak out, just wear what you usually would”

“Okay, okay yea you’re right” The boy breathed out, “When should I come over?”

“Now” Y/n simply said

“Okay i’ll be there in like one- three minutes” John said, Y/n could hear him getting up from his bed (Or maybe it was his bean bag, she was unsure).

“Okay cool, see you then” She smiled

“Yea, okay” He said

After a couple seconds a silence, Y/n smiled and rolled her eyes “Bye Fru” she said as she hung up the phone.

“He’s coming over?” Duff said, turning his head to look at Y/n standing by the phone.

“Yea” she said

“And you’re wearing that?” He asked her.

She looked down at her oversized hoodie & her socks, furrowing her eyebrows “I see nothing wrong with what i’m wearing”

“Also, be nice to him alright?” She said, her head tilting to the side.

“We’re the nicest people to exist” Axl smiled at her

Y/n sighed, “Just be nice”

“Shit i never told him what room number were in” Y/n said to herself, walking into her room to put on her shoes.

Before walking out the door, she turned to look at the five boys, who were already looking at her.

“Be nice” She said as she walked out.

“Are we gonna be nice?” Izzy asked, looking at Duff.

“I think we should” Duff said, wondering if he should interrogate the boy.

“Should i ask him any questions?” Duff asked the boys.

“Ask him if he does drugs” Slash said

Axl shook his head, “Probably not the right time to ask that question, ya know, after what happen.”

“Shit yea you’re right”

“Ask him if he’s a virgin” Izzy said, letting out a laugh.

“Okay you guys are no help” Duff rolled his eyes.

“Do you think they’ll like me?” John said as him and Y/n stood in front of Duffs door.

“I think so” Y/n said “Just be yourself” she smiled at him.

He breathed out “Okay”

Y/n opened the door to reveal all five men sitting on the couch (and two of them sitting on some lounge chairs that came from god knows where).

“You must be Fru” Duff said, standing up

John looked at Y/n with wide eyes “That’s me”

“I’m Duff”

“Cool” John blurted out, looking at Y/n to help him out

“He knows who all of you guys are” The girl spoke up.

“So are you guys dating or something” Duff asked, slight smirk on his face as he watched the two become flustered.

“No!” They both said in unison

“We’re just um” Y/n said looking at John, then back to her brother “We’re just friends” She awkwardly smiled.

Duff laughed at the two, “Alright, that’s cool”

“You a virgin?” A voice, which belonged to Steven spoke up.

Johns eyes widened (even more, if possible) as he heard the rest of the boys let out a small laugh “What?” he embarrassedly said

Y/n furrowed her eyebrows, upset that they had made John feel embarrassed.

She shot a nasty look towards Duff, then to Steven “Fuck off Steven” she rolled her eyes.

Grabbing Johns hand, she walked the both of them to her room and closed (more like slammed) the door shut.

She rolled her eyes “Sorry about that”

“It’s okay, he just caught me off gaurd” he said, taking a look at Y/n’s room. “Do you share this room?” he asked, looking at the very messy side of the room.

“Yea, that’s Slash’s side, he’s not the cleanest person” She let out a little laugh.

She went ahead and layed herself on her bed (The side by the wall, if that makes sense). she patted the empty side next to her “Bring your ass over here” she said as John smiled.

Laying next to her, John turned his head to look at her.

“I um- I wanted to ask you something” Y/n said, remembering the concert.

“Don’t scare me” John furrowed his eyebrows

“It’s nothing serious” Y/n smiled “It’s just the guys have a concert tonight, and they asked if I wanted to go”

“Let me guess, you want me to go with you” John attempted to smile.

Y/n sighed “Yea. I just don’t wanna be there alone”

“I’ll go with you” he looked at her

“Really?” Y/n raised her eyebrows “I don’t want you to feel forced to come”

“I wanna go” John said

“Oh, okay” “But if you change your-”

John chuckled at the girl, “Y/n don’t worry, we’ll go together okay?” He said holding her hand.

Y/n nodded her head “Okay”

John looked over her face, “You know you haven’t kissed me today”

Y/n rolled her eyes, and gave him a kiss “So sorry sir Fru”

“All is forgiven” He spoke in a british accent, making Y/n laugh.

And on the other side of the door…

“What are they saying?” Steven said in a hushed tone.

“I can’t hear” Axl said, his ear on the door

“Should they even have the door closed?” The redhead continued, turning over to look at Duff.

Duff furrowed his eyebrows “I don’t think so?” he questioned.

Axl huffed, “Do you want them to have the door closed”

“Not really” the blonde scratched his neck

“Yea they shouldn’t have it closed” Slash spoke from the couch.

“Leave them alone man, what’s the worst that can happen” Izzy said, blowing out smoke from his mouth.

Duff shot him a look “I think we know what’s the worst that can happen”

Izzy shrugged, “You’re right”

“Maybe tell them something?” Steven looked at Duff.

“I don’t think I-” Duff spoke

“If you don’t tell them something i will” Axl rolled his eyes.

“No no, just go in there and see what their doing” Duff said

“What?” Axl furrowed his brows.

“Make up and excuse or something, see what there doing then come out and tell us” Duff said

“I could pretend I needa get something” Slash said.

“Perfect, okay everyone act like everything’s normal” Duff said, walking away from the door, Steven and Axl following him.

“Nothing about us is normal” Axl mumbled to himself.

“You better act Slash” Duff said

“Oh yea, i might change career paths after this” The curly head laughed, walking towards the door.

“No but really what was tha- Oh hey Slash” Y/n said as she stared at Slash.

Slash’s eyes quickly darted at the scene in front of him, Johns head was on Y/n’s chest, Y/n was running her hands through his hair.

Wait… has Y/n had a tank top on this whole time? Slash thought to himself

“Hey” he nodded towards the both of them, “Sorry- just came in to grab my um… jacket.”

Y/n smiled, “Okay”

Slash grabbed whatever jacket was laying on his bed, turning around and walking out the door, leaving it open.

“he left the fucken door open” Y/n mumbled as John lifted his head to look at her.

“There’s a lot of people in this place” John spoke

“I know” Y/n sighed, “But they’re cool, i promise”

“They sure look cool” John smiled “Real hardcore”

Y/n laughed “Yea” “But they’re actually some dweebs”

John rubbed his face tiredly on Y/n’s chest, lightly laughing.

Axl peeked his head through the door, scaring John as they made eye contact.

“What?” Y/n said as she saw John flinch.

“Nothing just- one of your brothers friends” He said looking at the door.

Y/n looked at Axl and laughed “What are you doing Axl?”

“Oh nothing… just keeping an eye out” The red head said as he walked passed the room.

Y/n just rolled her eyes “Regret coming over?”

“Only a little bit” John said as he looked at the girl smiling in front of him.

“Do you think they’ll see me if I kiss you?” John whispered.

Y/n looked at the door “Hopefully not” she said as she leaned in to kiss him.

“HEY!” The two heard as they broke away from their kiss, turning to look at who the hell was spying on them.

“Axl what the fuck are you still doing there?” Y/n asked

“That’s not what’s important” Axl said as he turned his head to call Duff “DUFF COME HERE”

“What?” Duff said walking over to the door, along with everyone else.

“I’m fucked” John mumbled to Y/n as she laughed at him.

“You’re fine Fru” she mumbled back

“They were kissing!” Axl said, pointing at Y/n and John.

“And you guys are just friends huh?” Duff looked at the two, especially at John.

“Don’t be so exaggerated” Y/n rolled her eyes “We just kissed”

“KISSING LEADS TO SEX!” Steven spoke from behind Duff.

The two teenagers’ eyes widen

“Jesus Christ Steven” Y/n said

“You know it’s the truth!” Steven said

“That’s not my intention with Y/n” John said, looking at Duff.

“How do i know you’re telling the truth?” Duffs eyes narrowed at the boy.

“I don’t know” The boy shrugged “You just have to trust me.”

“Trust you? Just like that, just trust you” Duff scoffed

“I mean yea- I get what you’re trying to hint at, But I never intended for the shit that’s happen to happen, it just did” John spoke, “Y/n’s a good person, I wouldn’t want anything to happen to her”

After a few seconds of silence, Y/n spoke “You heard the man!”

Duff sighed, walking into the room and closing the door, leaving the other men outside.

A loud “Aw what the fuck!” was heard on the other side of the door.

Duff sat on Slash’s bed, facing Y/n and John, who were now sitting on the edge of her bed.

“Look- I appreciate you telling me that, and i know you two are just some teenagers and you guys should be exploring this world in LA, but i don’t want neither of you to get hurt” Duff breathed out.

“Physically or emotionally, and fuck- you guys have already seen some shit in just the week that’s pass. And i don’t want anything else to happen.” Duff said as he looked over the two.

“And I don’t dislike you Fru- it’s just that i don’t want you two acting like you guys have all the time in the world. Cause you don’t. Y/n’s leaving, and i need you guys to remember that.” He said, finally finishing what he had to say.

Y/n sighed, the ugly truth has been told. Neither John or Y/n wanted to admit it. But they had already fallen for each other. And it made Y/n want to cry.

“I get it” John said “Thanks for looking out for us” he sighed out.

Y/n looked at Duff “Yea- Thanks”

Duff smiled at them, “Yea” he said, “You guys still coming tonight?” he asked, as if he hadn’t just hit them with the heart wrenching reminder that they didn’t have all the time in the world.

“Yea. We’re going” John smiled at him.

————

CHAPTER 7!!!! I finally updated omg, thank you all for being patient with me 😭🙏. Hope you all enjoyed!!!

And don’t you guys start thinking shits sweet now muahaha, im already planning on some bullshit to happen😏😏😏.

Till next time xxx

[radio-navlee]

It’s okay if you don’t do this one, but can you maybe do another fic of lee!noah being wrecked my team C.I.R.R.H?

Oh Em Gee. How could I say no to a Lee Noah request?<3

Smarty Pants

Not only were they stuck with the worst team name possible, the person who stuck them with it transferred onto another team! Now instead of a crazy fan girl, they had an actual insane crazy girl. Noah pouted on the plane thinking “How could this season be anymore sucker?”

“Hey Noah? Do you think if I were to eat raw chicken, then a hot pepper, would it make cooked chicken in my belly?” Owen chuckled

Noah gave him a look, a ‘wtf did u just say’ kind of look. He was used to Owens goofy questions and nasty food combos, he wasn’t gonna waste a breath on answering that.

“Better question! If you ate, like swallowed, a whole tomato and then, you know those street performers? Yea, those guys who shove swords down their throat! Do you think they could chop up the tomato?” Izzy questioned excitedly.

‘God this was such a headache!’ Noah thought. Apparently Izzy god forsaken question sparked up a conversation which included Tyler, Izzy, Owen, and weirdly enough, Alejandro... Is what Noah thought.

Alejandro was actually watching Noah. He could tell something wasn’t right with Noah, he could tell that Noah was very untrusting of him. And Al didn’t know why.

Alejandro got up and sat next to him. Noah didn’t notice and kept thinking to himself, almost dozing off.

“Noah? You ok?” Al asked, he acted like he cared but really he was trying to get blackmail or something out of him. Noah jumped a bit not expecting Al to be talking to him or sitting next to him

“Now I’m not, you’re talking to me.” Noah said sarcastically, slightly smiling when he saw Al needing to calm himself before speaking.

“Are you always this sarcastic?” Al sighed

“Depends, do you always ask dumb questions?”

“Noah you making it really hard to talk to you, friend!”

“Then don’t? I was just fine not talking, what makes you think I want to talk to YOU?” Noah growled, getting pissed at this point

“Somebody’s grumpy,”

"Whatever!" Noah sighed, leaving Al angry.

“Guys! Guys! Do you I could be the mama monkey and Noah could be my son and I’d have to pick the dirt off him like they do on TV?” Izzy exclaimed

“Woah! No, you are not touching m-” Noah was interrupted

“Izzy I love your creativity, I bet Noah would love it even more!” Al smiled at Noah expense. Izzy began pinching at Noah’s clothes acting like she was picking off dirt.

“Izzy you would make a great monkey mom!” Owen laughed

Al noticed Noah started to squirm and his eyes were all panicked. Izzy kept picking at Noah’s clothes, accidentally pinching his skin at sometimes. Noah would jump every time, almost curling in on him self.

“Noah? Why do you look so distraught my friend?”

Noah just shook his head, not risking a giggle to slip out.

“Uh oh Izzy! I don’t think Noah likes your act!”

Izzy turned to Al confused. Noah turned to Al with panic.

“No! No Izzy I did like it, very creati-tive, HEHMP!” Noah tried to pled but Al put his hand over his mouth.

“He lying Izzy!”

Izzy growled and dug her hands into Noah making him squeal. Izzy wasn’t even trying to tickle Noah, she was just mad.

“Uh oh, somebody’s about to find out Noah’s ticklish!” Owen whispered to Tyler.

“Noah’s ticklish?” Tyler said out loud.

“OWPHEN!!” Noah muffled under Al’s hand,

“Oh so that’s what that was!” Al said grabbing Noah’s hands and pinning it above him.

Noah shook his head violently, squirming around to try to get free. Al was very strong, and Noah was very weak, who knew!

"Owen you knew Noah was ticklish?" Al asked, reaching to poke at Noahs sides

"Well, just look at him! He was squirming like a earth worm!" Owen joked

"NONONONONO!" Noah begged trying to dodge Als hands

"Noah stop moving!" Al grumbled, deciding to just sit on Noah's legs to keep him for moving.

"Owen I swear to god, once I'm out of this your so dead!" Noah threated, snapping his mouth shut as Al finally latched his hands onto Noah's sides.

“There we go! So Owen mind elaborating on what you mean?” Al yapped.

“Well, it was the first season and me and Noah had just met!-“

“OWEHEN!!”

“He was reading this book and I decided to cheer him up. It’s strange though, he gets weird after you tickle him.” Owen explained, turning to look at Noah to see his head hung in defeat and face burning red.

“Aw how cute,” Al teased moving spots randomly to try to get Noah to break.

“Huh, anybody wanna help me out here?” Al spoke

That one sectance alone sent shivers down Noah’s spine, it’s good that nobody in that room has ever tickled Noah, but that makes it worse.

Owen sat down towards Noah’s legs, Izzy sitting closer to Noah, and Tyler just there to keep his arms up and pined.

“Wow Noah, I never seen you this worried before. Something wrong?���

“Y-Yeah! You guys are about to gang up on me for no reason! I have a right to be scared!”

“scared of a little tickles?” Al said wiggling his fingers close to Noah stomach making him suck in to try to get away

“Stop thAHAT!” Noah squeaked as Al dove his hands straight to his stomach.

“Oh shoot, did we start already?” Owen asked jumping in to start tickling the top of Noah’s knee. Noah kicked out like a reflex every time Owen touched his skin

“GAH-hehehAHaHa! Quihihit ihit!!” Noah giggled

“There’s that nice laugh!” Al smirked

“Eheheahat. Shihihit!” Noah growled

Al scoffed in anger, sadly for Noah this just encouraged Al to get him back harder. Al moved his hands lower, underneath where his belly button would be. Owen moved his hands to his calves. the combo of spots made Noah insane, he needed something to take his mind off it.

“Aw poor thing, bad spot Noah?” Al teased

“FUhUhahuKIng STAhAHoP!!” Noah shook his head violently

“Izzy why don’t you join in?” Al asked

“Hmmm, that’s a good question! I was waiting for the right moment!” Izzy spoke softly fluttering her fingers around Noah’s neck and ears.

Noah squealed falling into a fit of child like giggles

“this is fun!” Izzy said

“Indeed,” Al agreed suddenly changing positions to squeeze Noah’s hips.

“FUHAHAHAHCK!!” Noah gasped bucking from side to side. Owen began to massage into both Noah calves, using his thumb to add pressure into the boy.

Noah screamed kicking out, cackling like crazy. Seeing Noah like this made Al feel two different things. First, satisfaction for Noah making a fool of him, and second, Awe for never seeing Noah like this ever. Laughing freely, well I guess not freely, he has no choice.

“GOHOHOHOHOD GET OFFFFFF!!” Noah begged

“I think Noah’s getting tired guys!” Owen spoke backing off

“Tried? Nah, Noah are you tired” Al jokingly asked

“SHIHIHIT! YES I AHAHAHAAMMM!!” Noah threw his head back

Izzy began to stop, which was a surprise to everybody. Turns out she just saw a rat run across the floor and needed a new ‘ally’.

“Al, you might wanna stop soon. I don’t think he can take much more” Owen said softly

“PLEAHEHEHEASE!!!”

“Fine, but he has to apologize!”

“FOHOHOR WHAHAT!!”

“For saying, implying, that it’s such a bore to talk to me!” Al said dramatically

“IM SOHOHORRY!! IM SOHORRY!! YOURE NAHAHAT A BOHORE TO TALK TOHOHOHO!!” Noah took in a breath of air as soon as Al stopped.

“There! Now was that so hard?” Al spoke

Noah just giggled back at Al, transitioning to the ‘weird’ Owen was talking about.

Noah spent the rest of the day, all smiles and giggles. When he woke up the next morning, he tried to forget anything abt the day before. ‘God I was such a headache!’

-Navy out! :)

[odetothestars]

Another day another omfd post

Izzy Hands = My beautiful princess with a disorder❤️

He is such a fascinating character to me and so beautifully portrayed I genuinely couldn’t help but love him dearly from episode 2 of season 1.

Like yea okay he did some fucked up stuff…and? He’s literally just baby girl leave him alone. You’ve never spiralled into a deranged, homicidal jealous rage? He’s so real for that

I’m an Izzy apologist, I love that angry little weird dude and I’m not gonna argue about it, thanks so much:)

[awrestlinggirlwholoves80sbands]

Hey, i am the one who requested the slaxl story: yea I meant axl telling Izzy about slash, sorry if that was unclear😅 I respond you this way cause I'm sure how I can comment under your post😭 (new on Tumblr)

Okay so a year has passed since this ask (ops) and I am so sorry, but between uni and anything I've never got the chance to finish it until now. I hope you'll enjoy it :)

Izzy's POV

The clock read 3 a.m when a loud bang on the door woke Izzy up. The guitarist almost wanted to laugh, considering that he decided to go to sleep earlier for once but destiny had other plans for him. He settled on ignoring the noise however it just kept going.

“Go away!” He yelled, hoping that the fucker would give up.

“Izzy, pleaseeee open up!” Axl's voice pleaded.

“Go harass Duff, he’s probably still awake.”

He might have been Axl’s childhood best friend but it didn’t mean he had to deal with his shit, especially when he just wanted to sleep and nothing would change that not even the grip forming in his heart due the guilt.

“Please Izzy, I need your help.”

Izzy wanted to say no and go back to sleep or pretend to until Axl would have left him alone, but something inside him urged him to listen to his friend. More than once he found himself calming the redhead back to sleep or allowing him to let his emotions out, especially for Axl and the whole band’s sake.

Reluctantly he stood up, his hands curled up in fists for a second and promising himself that he would make sure to let the other man know he owned him. When he opened the door, he was relieved to see Axl's face still intact however his glossy eyes had some red in them that couldn’t only be because of the alcohol.

“What do you want, shithead?” He asked unceremoniously.

“I need your help, Izzy.”

“Yeah, you kind of said that already. So are you going to repeat that all night or are you giving a good enough reason why you’re knocking on my door at 3 a.m.?”

“Okay, so do you know Slash?” Axl sounded completely serious which made Izzy almost let out a hysterical laugh. He couldn't help but arch his eyebrows at how Axl was tiptoeing around the subject, even if he was more surprised about how he still hadn't pushed him out of his room. His stomach lurched at the thought he was becoming soft.

“You mean Slash, our guitarist, the one we have known for a year now?” His sarcasm was bitter but it didn’t seem to faze Axl.

“Yeah.. me and Slash did something…”

Izzy rolled his eyes. As much as he wanted to strangle Axl to make him spill the beans, a part of him didn’t want to know what those idiots did because it meant getting involved and he wasn't ready to bail Slash out of jail again, even if deep down he loved them. Before saying anything he sighed, letting out all the anger from his voice because he had learned long ago that it was pointless.

“Something illegal?”

“No, well maybe it’s immoral for some people. My step dad would have found it such but technically it’s not illegal.”

The guitarist forgot that if Axl normally would talk for hours, while drunk he would do that even more while making zero sense. Something so wonderful when he just wanted to sleep.

“Axl, please just tell me what the hell you two have done!”

“Me and Slash went on a date, okay?!”

Izzy’s eyes widened in surprise. The sexual tension between Axl and Slash was obvious, the two were constantly hugging and teasing each other, however he didn’t think they would actually act on those feelings. Probably his tiredness didn't only close his eyes but his brain too, because he felt genuinely happy for them, even if the redhead’s tone told him the date didn’t go as planned.

“On a date? Damn, did you bite the bullet and ask him?”

“Well it wasn’t officially a date but we both knew it was.” Axl said, sounding just like a teenager.

Izzy's head started pulsing in anticipation of the cheesy story that was about to unfold, he would rather eat sand than having to listen to that but he doubted that pretending to faint could get away with not hearing the story. However, making his eyebrows arch was the reason Axl decided to come to him, usually Duff was the love advisor. Was it because he trusted him more? Or was it karma deciding to kick his ass by not making him able to get a good night of sleep?

“What’s wrong with the date?”

“Everything was cool and then he kissed me!” The singer spat those words almost like they were poison.

“You weren’t okay with that?” Izzy 's heart started to beat faster as rage slowly crept close to the surface. He was well aware of Axl’s past and how he didn’t take lightly people forcing on him, so it was only expected for him to go into his protective mode. Hell, if he discovered Slash had done something to Axl, he would have killed himself with his hands.

“No no, I wanted to but then I freak out because it made everything real! Because I really like him but we agreed to be friends with benefits and I don’t know what to do.” The redhead sniffled, hiding his face with his hair.

The guitarist's brain just shut down, unable to process a correct answer to give, he knew he needed to be honest but not too harsh, sympathetic yet realist. He just stayed silent for what seemed the longest time, Axl's eyes fixed on him like he had the answer to every problem of the universe, while Izzy was just digging through his brain for possible outcomes.

“Well isn’t it pointless to not be together if he likes you?”

"Well, you are already having sex. What's the problem?"

“Don’t worry about it, true love always wins.”

“Fucking hell Axl, it’s 3 in the morning and I just want to sleep.”

“Why don’t you talk with him tomorrow? When you are sober and not a crying mess. Just tell him you want to take things slow and time will tell.” He decided to set on, hoping it would work.

Axl tilted his head, pondering what Izzy said like a big truth about the secrets of the universe, and eventually he nodded in agreement. The other man's shoulder relaxed, maybe the universe was really rooting his way and spared him more Axl's tears and possible screams.

“You’re right. I just gotta wait and I’ll tell him and if doesn’t accept him, well fuck him!”

“Great, now why don’t you go back to your room and just sleep on all of this?” The black haired man suggested, almost taking his arm to direct him to the door. However a knock to the door made him groan in frustration, every ounce of diplomacy leaving his body at the prospect of having to deal with another of his bandmates.

“Whoever you are, you better get lost in the next five seconds or I will murder you.”

“Izzyyyy, I need your help.” Slash’s intoxicated voice replied.

Another drunk friend, as dealing with Axl wasn’t enough for him. The redhead’s eyes widened were a big tell that he was about to freak out and the guitarist didn’t know if he could handle him. Pinching his nose, he decided to take matters into his own hands before he had to bash his head against the wall, after all his hotel room wasn't a therapist's office.

“Slash, go to Duff. It isn’t really a good moment.” He yelled sternly.

“But I need you!”

“I’m going out of here.” Axl said, moving towards the window and prompting Izzy to throw his arm to block him.

“Fuck no! You will stay here and I’ll try to keep him out.” Izzy squeezed his shoulders in a calming way.

He opened the door just enough to see his band mate: clearly intoxicated, his eyes weren't red but they were darting all around and his fingers were playing with one of the bracelets he always wore. It was another prime example of a band mate in crisis, but to make everything worse, he didn't know Slash as much as he knew Axl.

"Slash, why don't you go to Duff?" He crossed his arms, hoping to scare him enough to discourage him from staying there.

"Because he can't understand... you know him better." Slash's curls automatically covered his face, but that didn't fool Izzy and only made his heart drop in defeat.

"Know who better?" He sounded as vague as possible, as if he couldn't hear Axl crawling on the floor and hiding in the bathroom.

"Axl. Look, I'm afraid that I freaked him out. I'm scared too, I get it but I need to gain his trust back."

Izzy rubbed his temples, the headache slapping him with such a force that he wished he could make him pass out, giving him a way out of this mess. He had another choice to make: should he tell Slash that Axl was there, and let them solve their problems? Or should he protect his friend and keep his mouth shut?

He tasted his pockets for cigarettes, probably they could have cleared his mind and corrupted Slash, making him gain some time. All of a sudden a loud noise made his hand fall against his side and a small curse came out his mouth, even Slash in his drunken stupor was attracted by the unusual sound.

"What's that noise?" A look of puzzlement crossed Slash's face.

"I was busy before you interrupted me." Izzy gestured vaguely, hopefully the other man was too drunk to question his lie.

"You never bring a girl into your room."

"Now what? Do you think you know what I do in my free time?" His face contorted in an annoyed expression.

It took all his self control to not ran outside the room and leave the two idiots with themselves, all this diplomacy was making him sick to his stomach. Slash's glossy eyes stared at him for a second, but he was too out of it to argue back, however right when he thought the situation was diffused, he heard the bathroom door opening.

Axl seemed to have sober up a bit, his face was clean of any sign of tears however his eyes quickly went down as soon as he caught a glimpse of Slash. On the other hand Slash seemed awkward, his mouth opened in slight surprise as Izzy could clearly see the gears in the other man's brain trying to come up with something but only resorting to silence.

"Hi Slash." The redhead said shyly.

"Were you hiding in the bathroom?"

Axl's face scrunched up for a moment and Izzy saw a familiar fire in his eyes that made him ready to step in if needed, but apparently the redhead's rational side seemed to win so he just took a deep breath and did not break Slash's nose to the delight of Izzy.

"I guess we need to talk."

Izzy's eyes bolted to both men as the tension was filling the air: Axl's confidence was gone as he kept looking around the room while Slash just stood still as he was waiting for the Earth to swallow him alive. Izzy wanted to leave the room but a look from childhood best friend's told him to stay.

"Look Axl, if you didn't like the kiss it's fine. I know we said to keep things casual-" Slash started but he was quickly interrupted.

"No, I liked the kiss. It's just a bit more complicated than that." Axl started to play with his bracelets, trying to find the right words.

"Oh..."

Izzy's hands hitched to butt the heads of his friends together, maybe that could help them be less oblivious. A sense of discomfort took over as he realized that he was just standing here, watching two people talking about their deepest feelings in front of a bandmate. He needed to do something so he headed towards the only window in his room to lit up a cigarette.

"I... I like you Slash, okay? But this shit ain't easy! I've never had feelings for a guy, I've been taught it was a sin."

"You like me?" Slash asked, with such a surprised tone that Izzy had to turn around to watch both of them.

"Yeah. I know I said "no feelings involved" but it happened."

Izzy watched Slash stumbling towards Axl and gently kissing him. For a moment Izzy's heartbeat got faster but Axl quickly reciprocated the kiss, making shame invade the guitarist's body.

"I'll be outside... try to not use my bed for "fun times" " He said but the other two man were too busy eating their faces to acknowledge him in any way.

Axl POV

Axl barely heard the door closing, he was too focused on how Slash's lip tasted like a whole bottle of Jack and a pack of cigarettes or how his hands were buried in the other man's curls, making Slash purring in his mouth. Quickly their lips weren't gently touching anymore but smashing against each other, the air uncomfortably getting trapped in his lungs and his cheeks turning red.

"I'm taking this forward, okay? Tell me to stop whenever you don't feel up to it anymore." Slash said and Axl nodded, his face relaxing at the thought of having a choice.

Slash's hand traveled to Axl's shirt, his finger played with the hems without actually lifting it while their feet were subconsciously leading them towards the bed. The same bed Izzy forbidden them to touch. Axl tugged Slash's shirt, hating his moment of clarity because he wanted nothing more than to keep kissing, but the other man didn't budge.

"Slash?"

"Mh?" He said, interrupting the kiss.

"Izzy would kill us if we touched his bed." Slash sighed and stepped away from Axl. "But maybe we can continue in your room." The redhead added.

Slash's lips immediately turned into a smirk but he hesitated for a minute.

"So we are officially more than fuck buddies? Because I can't deal with another run like the one we had before, I thought you were going to take a plane or kill me!"

"Yes, we are. I might take some time but I promise."

Axl felt Slash's hand on his, squeezing it reassuringly and the cold metal of his ring gave him a weird sense of comfort, he couldn't explain it but it just felt like Slash. He let him guide him to the door as fear slowly left his body.

Izzy's POV

He sat against the door, his head pounding and his eyes tired which was so fucking stupid because everything was solved, there was no need for his body to be so dramatic. He pondered about resting,not sleeping, just to see if it eased the pain of his head.

"Izzy?" The voice was far away but he just ignored it. He was so close to drift away when the voice came back again and louder.

"Izzy!" It sounded familiar but his brain was too exhausted to match any face to the voice.

"I'm sleeping, leave me alone." He replied.

The sound of steps only lasted a couple of seconds before he felt someone sitting next to him, all his reflexes were apparently dull because he didn't react at all. A strong smell of cigarettes and a very specific cologne hit his nostrils and revealed the mysterious man.

"Duff, what are you doing here?" He said, giving up and opening his eyes.

Duff's shoulder dropped in relief, his red eyes holding all the remaining anxiety running through his body. Izzy had no idea if he was about to laugh or cry because having to babysit him sounded like a nightmare.

"Oh thank God you're alive. I was smoking outside the bar and then I noticed Slash running towards the hotel, I thought he was in trouble until I watched him get inside your room."

"Yeah, he is okay. He was just very drunk and he and Axl had to sort something out."

"Is Axl going to kill him? What's going on?"

Izzy's hands started to play with the pack of matches in his hands, he looked Duff right into his eyes with a blank expression while his mind was traveling as fast as light. He didn't want to harm Axl or Slash in any way, even if he always had a good amount of trust in Duff's open mind.

"No. I'm about to say something and it has to stay between us, okay? Axl and Slash are dating.

Duff started laughing and then it turned into wheezing, so much that he had to hold his stomach from it and his eyes started to water with tears. Rage shot through Izzy's body, making his face twist into the scariest impassible expression he was capable of, the one that usually meant he was about to throw hands.

" God, I thought Slash upset Axl or something. I mean, are we even surprised? Those two are behaving like a married couple all the time, fucking finally!"

Izzy didn't even realize he clutched his hands until he relaxed them, Duff's supportive nature came handy once again and he found it hard to suppress the smallest hint of a smile. As much as the bassist was a piece of work, but Izzy couldn't really say anything since he was one too, moments like this reminded him of the weird bond they had about making sure the rest of the band was okay.

Suddenly the door next to him opened, revealing a certain drummer with blonde hair staring at Duff and Izzy with the widest smile.

"Axl and Slash are together?" Steven squealed with excitement.

"Steven, what the hell? You scared me!" Duff said, holding a hand over his heart.

The drummer ignored him to instead close his door and sat across Izzy, eyes full of joy and his body vibrating with energy.

"It's almost 4am why are you awake?" Izzy hoped to distract him.

"I couldn't sleep. So, are Axl and Slash together? How did that happen?"

The guitarist sighed, he pondered if he should have ignored Steven all together but the angel on his shoulder seemed to win, his face softened as he looked at the other man. He went over the story again, his calm voice in total contrast with Steven's continuous face expression even if in a way it made him feel validated in having to deal with those two idiots.

"Wow, I've never knew they were fuck buddies. I mean, one time I saw Slash and a redhead in bed but I thought it was a chick!" Steven said, making Duff laugh again.

Before he could stop it, Izzy felt a small laughter escaping his body as the image of a very naked and dramatic Axl screaming plagued his head. His head moved closer to the door but he couldn't hear much so Izzy returned to focus on Duff and Steven and their very important argument about pizza toppings, but soon their voice became only a background noise and his eyes dropped.

Maybe he was finally able to get some sleep...

The door slammed open, making Izzy's eyes immediately snap open, he turned his body around and he saw Slash's guilty eyes shooting an apology, quickly followed by Axl's confused face. Irritated wasn't even enough to describe the pure heat radiating through his body, but he would have lied if he said that he wasn't relieved by their two friends holding hands.

" What are Duff and Steven doing here?" Axl tilted his head quizzically.

"Duff thought you would kill Slash and Steven wanted a sleepover." Izzy explained and that seemed enough for Slash, who tugged Axl towards their room before the redhead could say anything.

The doorknob almost lured Izzy like a siren as his tired body screamed for some rest, he barely realized his feet moving towards his room before he was distracted by Steven's cheerful voice.

"Wanna join me and Duff in our sleepover?"

"No." He said, closing the door right in his friends' face and falling flat on his bed.

[raytoroapologist]

sorry what is the ofmd LATINX BLOCKLIST??????

god. YEAH. SO.

promise you'll still respect me despite knowing all of this information. but:

back when i was on twitter a bunch there was this pack of ofmd fans who were really really into the character izzy hands. like REALLY into him, totally recharacterized him as a helpless victim (which is antithetical to his entire character!) but yea. people didn't like that, so there were a lot of people who considered themselves 'Izzy Haters' and there was even a gc full of teens called the izzy haters groupchat; a grown man who was a professor threatened legal action against them one time for commenting mean things about a fictional man who is based on a real life racist pirate on his posts. Anyway! there was a block list compiled by the hardcore Izzy fans that supposedly was a compilation of izzy detractors, but people started to notice that like. a REALLY large amount of the accounts listed had emojis in their display names of like the pr or mexico flag etc, or on their profiles it was otherwise indicated that they were latino/a. in response to being called out for blatant racism, izzys brave legion of fandom elders doubled down (pretty sure someone made some kind of infographic or flow chart or something trying to prove it was not in fact racist??). it was insane and i missed a chunk of it because i too, was blocked.

[18catsreading]

Brennan: so with your wits, you've stashed the shadow falcon protocol -- the real ine -- deep in your gear. The fake us lifted up as you are arrested, and the fake one is crushed. You feel your leg becoming warm.

Rehka: uh oh

Brennan: you turn around. Completely naked, is Carter Haldwell. He can't stop pissing.

Rehka: and he pissed on me?

Brennan: he literally can't stop pissing.

Alex: where's the water coming from?

Izzy: *quietly dying*

Brennan: He grabs you, pulls you close, and goes [as Haldwell]: what the fuck did you do to me?

Rehka/Usha/G13: there is a thing as being too hydrated. Well -- he said "what did you do to me?"

Brennan/Haldwell: what did you do to me? I've been pissing gallons. I can't stop. It doesn:t even make sense. There's not enough piss in me!

Rehka/Usha/G13: I'm just making you as uncomfortable as i always am.

Brennan/Haldwell: oh, shit. I'm sorry.

Usha/G13: no, i don't have incontinence.

Brennan/Haldwell: get this freak in jail!!

Brennan: so, I think the shadow falcon protocol and the badge, where would you hide them in a place where they could not find them?

Jacob: Oh! We don't need you to say it for us!

Izzy: *overlapping with Jacob, same energy*

Brennan: Straight-up, Usha, where are they?

Alex: as this is happening, can Kingskin calmly walk up towards G13 and go--

Brennan: yeah

Alex/Kingskin: Gentlemen, i'm sure this is a situation that a little paper could --

Ally: you have that? You have that ability?

Alex: I have Wealthy. I have: Spend a turbo token to ease a bad situation with cash.

Brennan: hell yea

Alex/Kingskin: it seems like a very bad situation, but I just, you know, hand him a stack and a handshake, see what happens.

Brennan: hell yes, uh, you have him a stack. You give this naked pissing FBI agent a stack of cash.

Alex: that's who i give it to?

Brennan: he is the agent in charge. He is in charge.

Alex/Kingskin: Gentlemen.

Brennan: you see he looks at it and goes [as Haldwell]: a little donation to the Bureau, Kingskin?

Alex/Kingskin: hey, use it however you'd like. Maybe for that missing finger.

Brennan/Haldwell: yeah. Yeah, I lost my finger, and I can't stop pissing.

Rehka: never stop pissing

Brennan: and you see he goes [as Haldwell]: all right, boys. No need to arrest these two. Looks like they've volunteered to come downtown and have a little talk with the Bureau about what the fuck the Empresario was doing here at G&G Industries. Isn't that right, G13? *Pulls them close menacingly*

Rehka/G13: spits

Brennan/Haldwell: ow!

Jacob: a thick loogie

Rehka: it was a kidney stone

Ally: ow!

Brennan: he goes [as Haldwell]: Get them downtown. They're cooperating, aren't they?

Brennan: and you see one of the agents leans over and goes [as Agent]: Agent Haldwell you need to go to the hospital right now.

Brennan: And he turns around and says [as Haldwell]: never tell me what to do again.

Brennan: and he goes [As Agent]: no, you ... its the whole ... Its the floor of the warehouse. Its spreading. Its like 30 feet in all directions.

[As Brennan]: and he goes [as Haldwell]: don't you think I know that, you fucking idiot? All right, get them downtown, and get me a shirt and tie! Don't get me pants!

Brennan: and he storms out of there. And the agents don't handcuff you but begin to lead you to a black town car to get you down to the Bureau to talk to them.