#yaoi posting from yours truly

[dishsoaptragedies]

he's not used to having long hair yet :((

[sunnycringe]

Souichi

[thedevilsrain]

eroica outfits volumes 1-10 🌹

[dairyfreenugget]

I could count the amount of original stories of mine that don't have horror elements on one hand and idk what that says about me

[asmimir]

Your art reminded of how the Unholy Alliance update made me go from very on the vence about Narinder to biggest Narinder defender will die in the trenches for my wife /hj

Like personally, them finally giving us the reasoning behind the Bishops attack on Narinder beyond vague prophecy changed a lot of the context behind the situation

And while, yes, the intentions behind his actions of resurrecting followers and his opinion on his new find extreme popularity were left quite vague (and why I don't if someone still interprets Narinder as the one mainly/equally at fault). It still doesn't change how it was a betrayal out of the Bishops fear of a possible betrayal. He wasn't conquering and overtaking them, he wasn't actively starving them, they just feared that possibility that he would.

It gets even more fucked up when you remember that all the Bishops ran their faiths by gifting and blessings their followers with the opposite of their domains (food, heath, etc) so Narinder actions where probably completely normal thing to do as a god of death in his mind, like.

In my fucked up fantasies (aka my interpretations of the canon), Narinder was only truly in the wrong when they asked the Lamb to sacrifice themselves. But getting into even more personal headcanons territory, for him it was likely just the natural/necessary think to do. He's a god of death that gave this little mortal life so they could do his bitting (that included them doing their own sacrifices, depending on your own gameplay), them sacrificing themselves was likely a given for him. Probably didn't consider that the Lamb would mind it, like, sacrificing yourself for your god just another tuesday in the life of a follower of death aint I right

So in conclusion, narilamb before post-game was a classic case of doomed yaoi/hurt people hurt people. Narinder asked the sacrifice-survivor to be sacrificed once again and the Lamb betrayed the one who was betrayed in return (pun half-intended)

(Really sorry for the ramble, it's almost midnight in my country and your art plagued me with thoughts. Hope you at least liked reading my deranged screams, I mean, my interpretations of the story. If you didn't, again, Im truly sorry. But Im still interested in your own thoughts regardless, so yeah... feel free to share??? I don't know how to phrase that in a good way, again, its almost midnigh)

no truer words have been said

[a-big-chicken-nerd]

Ice Emperor related fic recs?

ohohoho most certainly

thin ice breaks easily by lightningchicken has gotta be my all time favorite ice emperor fic. never fails to make me go a little insane its SO GOOD

lost and found by idkwhyimhere5462 is an absolute banger with the plot being utilized so perfectly to really show off what ice emperor was like during his reign as well as vex and boreal and their dynamic and its extremely good

adventures with the ice emperor by idkwhyimhere5462 is a series of absolutely banger oneshots

ruler from another realm by cybersearcher is an absolutely iconic one and a must read. not your typical ice emperor fic but the never-realm world building is too good

whetstone by spinchip is awesome i love the open ending and the continuation of akitas plot and the characterization SO much

i hope we both die by spinchip is another banger by spinchip because btw spinchip does nothing but bangers so definitely check out all their zane and post-ice emperor fics both on ao3 and tumblr

bitter cold by redboar is a LONG one!!! 100k+ words!!!! ice emperor is so cool in it and the way vex and grimfax are written is extremely good

i think that i damned the both of us by penofwildfire is truly premium quality toxic yaoi if shipping ice emperor and vex is your thing

how the frost forgets by kzfine is still currently ongoing and its super good so far with plenty of focus on vex as well which is always excellent to see

the ultimate guide to re-becoming zane julien by fronhdoesthings is awesome and still currently ongoing and it has really good illustrations and is just overall great

there are a lot of great zane focused post-never realm fics as well but i tried to keep this list to just ice emperor ones that stay WITHIN the never realm LOL one billion fics upon ye

[skyborneveggie]

oh my goodness your hanahaki posting is getting to me. do you have more specific thoughts on a (lawlight?) hanahaki au? flower symbolism, logistics of the illness progression/timeline, etc.? do they both get it, do they ever get over it, is this the ultimate doomed flower sickness yaoi??? The People (me) wanna know!!!

Omg thank you so much for asking because I have SO many thoughts!!! I'm currently writing a fic on this & it was supposed to be just a little plot bunny thing, but then the implications hanahaki would have for Light's psyche kept running on & on & on in my mind 😩.

To start with, I have a bit of an unconventional take when it comes to hanahaki and similar tropes... I have a very strong preference for returning agency to the person experiencing the symptoms, and in that way making hanahaki not about unrequited/unconfessed love, but about emotionally repressing one's own feelings and an inability to be honest with oneself. The body is eating itself, and out of the dead pieces grows a desperate, last chance, unignorable cry for help. For the mind to listen. A beautiful, growing thing that should have been nurtured, becomes murderous. It's a physical manifestation of extreme psychological distress; one that can only be healed by approaching emotional self-acceptance.

In this light, I feel that post-yotsuba Light is PRIME to fall prey to this. He's already the king of repression, and now on top of that he's repressing his grief over L's death to the furthest ends of the earth and back. Light is someone who, as presented in the narrative, is incapable of self-realization. What would he do if he was confronted with irrefutable physical evidence of his own emotions? Is he capable of putting in the work to heal? Is he so compartmentalized that he can pick out this one element of himself and ignore all the other hidden fragments it's tied to? Or are the many fibers of his subconscious too jumbled, too interwoven to be able to separate the strands of his feelings for L out from the mess? If he opens the box to look inward, will the truth of everything else come spilling out? Is it better to live, destroyed by the guilt of the truth of your actions; that you were only ever a mass-murderer and that. is. all? Or is it better to die, in denial, and convince yourself it was martyrdom?

And also like. The absolute shame Light would experience in the mid-to-late stages, when the effects become unconcealable. There's no way he would be able to hide it from the task force for all that time. How does someone who can't abide even the slightest hint of his own imperfection, deal with not only the internal knowledge of his emotional instability, but also the knowledge that everyone else can now see it on him too. The hatred he would feel any time he saw pity in someone's eyes. The feeling of his body betraying his mind, and everything he stands for.

Light is someone that I see as being very disconnected from his body to begin with, existing largely within his own mind, his body nothing more than a vehicle with which to navigate the unimpressive, foggy, distant physical world through. I can imagine that for a very, very long time, he would be in absolute denial about what is happening to him. His mind is the only true thing, and it knows itself better than anything. His body—clunky, stupid, vacuous—is a traitorous and meaningless vessel. It is wrong, it doesn't understand him. It is pulling things from nowhere.

At some point, he has to face the facts, acknowledge the truth about his grief and true feelings for L, and make a intentional decision about his future. There is no more naive & unconscious path forward. It is either a conscious choice to accept the known truth, or a conscious choice to suppress the known truth.

(Also I think Misa's interaction with all of this could be FASCINATING. I'm of the opinion Misa is not truly in love with Light either, and that she uses him as a prop in her own internal agenda to simulate love & normalcy. L is dead, so I don't imagine she'd see him as much of a threat to her built-up fantasy. I do wonder if she would fear for Light as an extension of fearing for herself and her own future without him, or if by nature of it being a slow decline, she would be able to come to terms with it in a toxic kind of way and romanticize the hell out of taking care of her "poor terminally ill boyfriend :(".)

The idea of Light getting hanahaki in the first half while L is still alive is interesting, & one I've thought about far less tbh. I kind of feel like since it is a present, living feeling at that point and hasn't yet become internalized as a past-tense emotional memory, it could be possible for Light to come to terms with his feelings without jeopardizing his internal construct. If it was between life and death, I'm certain he would choose life in that case. But I'm not sure that it would deter him from killing L in the end.

And perhaps this goes without saying, but if the operation was available in this theoretical universe, pre-yotsuba Kira!Light would recognize & get it all ripped out right away out of necessity, to prevent himself from being compromised under pressure of the game. Post-yotsuba Light, with the threat of immediacy removed and dull fog of mundanity descended over him, would have more time to linger in denial. (I am trying to decide, for my fic, whether it is believable that Light could be so deep in denial that he could let himself get to the point where the flowers and vines have inextricably embedded themselves in his system, and the surgery is no longer possible by the time he seeks help; or if his sense of self-preservation outweighs his emotional denial. I would love to hear your opinion on this 🤔) Yotsuba Light is so, so interesting to think about!! He has the highest capacity to heal his hanahaki the natural way, but he is still the same perfectionist, internally unforgiving person. I'm kind of torn as to whether I think he would be able to reach self-realization, or if he would still see his feelings as a weakness and get the flowers taken out. I could see either happening under the right circumstances.

As for L: I feel that L is able to be a lot more emotionally honest with himself than Light is. If he got hanahaki, I think it would fuck him up inside and that it would be despairing, but I also think that he doesn't have an internalized compulsion to lie to himself. He might hate it, but he would be able to accept the truth of his feelings, and banish the flowers by letting the knowledge of it live in his body like a silent, melancholic memento. In this way, L's hanahaki has the potential to be canon compliant. Alternatively, if he did get the surgery, it would be more of a calculated, impersonal decision, one that he might not really want to do but has to for his own best chance at surviving the game. He might be a bit mournful & carry a bit of preemptive regret over it. Unlike Light, who would tear everything out with furious self-loathing.

I could go on even more, but this has already become extremely long 🙈. Thank you for listening to me ramble endlessly haha.

[bloodlessbelmounte]

Eternity Will Bring You Near - Chapter 4

Masterlist

Summary:

Wade understood that Logan was from a world where Alpha, Beta and Omega were everyday terms, not exclusive to red-pilled incel fuckheads who kept inventing new performative male genders. Wade would’ve been classified as a Beta. Logan, however, was an Alpha - Wade’s read enough fanfiction and yaoi manga to know what that means. Though it doesn’t explain why Logan keeps sniffing him.

Pairing: Alpha!Worst Wolverine/Deadpool Genre: A/B/O, Smut, Domestic-ish Warnings: A/B/O Dynamics, Blood, Lots of Logan Biting, Anal Sex, Multiple Orgasms, Anal Fingering

Beginning Note: I have been afflicted by the AO3 curse yet again. Illness (I literally threw up after making the most progress on this chapter), Migraines (Another week long bitch), Injuries (Woo I had a trip to minor injuries). I was going to have chapter 4 be longer to make up for the delay but I sincerely believe that it is cursed and thus to lift that curse I must get it out into the world as quick as possible. So I've essentially split my plan for chapter 4 in half and that remaining second half will be released as chapter 5. Unbeta'd as usual so sorry for any mistakes.

Cross posted to AO3

We’re back again baby! Another chapter for you thirsty hoes. Hopefully in this chapter I’ll finally be screaming into a pillow in pleasure instead of you screaming into one in embarrassment, Belmounte.

Hey, writing that JillxCarlos after a year of not writing smut and SOBER was difficult okay.

Well I’m glad you don’t have to get wasted to write about me getting dicked down. Though I don’t forgive how you ended the previous chapter. And between then and now, September Seventeenth, you did no writing. Bitch your enby ass went to a carnival.

I shot down nine out of ten targets and got three prizes for my efforts. One of the carnies was even surprised by my speed. I got called a cross between you and the Hulk. Very proud of myself.

Bet you are. High praise to get compared to yours truly. Did you guys know that excellent marksmanship is listed as one of my superpowers? And I’m able to lift eight-hundred pounds canonically.

Anyways, let’s not leave the readers waiting any longer.

The main area of the cabin was wrecked, gouges clawed into the walls, floors, bed frame and mattress; smatterings of blood and cum splattered and smeared across various surfaces – even the ceiling; the couch was tipped backwards, the TV smashed on the floor and the coffee table shattered. Not even the kitchen was unscathed with cupboard doors hanging off their hinges, crockery in pieces and the sink filled with dirty plates. On the last days of Logan’s rut things had settled down a bit, the breaks between fucking getting longer but don’t get it twisted, the sex was intense as ever. It also meant that Logan was verbal again, no longer reduced to grunts (hot as that was for Wade) as his instincts were being satiated.

Logan had Wade in a mating press – his knees pinned down by his ears on the shredded mattress, bent in half as Logan straddled his ass – balls deep. Wade was cock drunk, words tumbling out of his mouth unfiltered while Logan’s cock rearranged his guts.

“Fuck Lo- so fucking deep,” the merc babbled between panting moans, clawing at the Alpha’s shoulders, “feels so good. Love your cock. Love you.”

Ah. Shit. He hadn’t meant to say that. That was an inside thought. They hadn’t broached the whole feelings thing since the ‘We Saved The Multiverse’ party months ago. Logan stilled above him, eyes wide and clear of the Rut’s haze, and Wade tensed in response. Shit shit shit shit shit!

“Say… say again, Bubba?” Logan murmured, staring into Wade’s fucking soul.

Wade gulped, looking away from the man above him, “L-love your cock?”

Logan frowned and grasped Wade’s chin forcing him to make eye contact – voice firm, “Not that, Wade. Say. It. Again. Y’know what I want to hear.”

Wade took a deep shuddering breathe, “L-love you.” He squeaked.

Logan gave him a wolfish grin, fangs peaking out as he purred, “Love y’too, mate.”

Oh.

Oh. Wade had read enough Omegaverse to know exactly how significant that last word was. He may or may not have blown his load then and there.

When the Rut had ended, the older mutant had insisted on cleaning up their bodily fluids and dishes during the early hours of the morning. Wade complained the entire time, turned out the TVA owned the cabin. So why in the ever loving fuck did they have to tidy? He was greeted to the rare sight of red dusting Logan’s cheeks as he grumbled about it being bad enough he had wrecked the walls, floors and furniture with his claws, they didn’t need to subject the poor clean up crew to their cum. Which, by the way if you didn’t know, smells bleach? Something Wade came to realise after hours of scrubbing. Luckily the time cleaning gave his Switch enough time to charge for the journey home. Also seeing Logan bent over on his knees in those tight jeans made Wade internally pray to whatever God is listening for a chance at fucking that ass. Sadly, he had that annoying eight hour drive instead.

Mary Puppins yipped and jumped up at Wade’s legs as he and Logan stepped through the door in the evening. Take-out boxes littered several surfaces, and plates and pots were left in the sink. Seemed like the girls hadn’t been too keen on keeping the place tidy in their absence, even with Vanessa’s check ins. Wade picked up Mary who eagerly lapped at his face in greeting as Logan scowled. He immediately set to scooping up the trash to grumpily shove it in the trash can before shrugging off his jacket, rolling up his shirt sleeves and setting to work on the washing up.

“Girlies! We’re home~!” Wade sang.

Blind Al shuffled out of her bedroom, parking herself on her recliner, “’bout damn time you motherfuckers got back. Vanessa just dropped off the rat. Laura’s out. Went for her classes a couple hours ago. Girl can’t do chores to save her life. Felt one bit of wet food while washing the dishes and she completely abandoned them.”

Wade sat on the couch, “See Angel Baby, I told you we need to get the both of you tested for autism.”

Logan only grunted in response as he tried to scrub off a particularly dried-on bit of sauce.

“Yes, yes I know. Pot calling the kettle black because undiagnosed ADHD. The difference here is that they’d try to medicate me which we both know won’t work because I’d metabolise a week’s worth in twenty minutes, so what’s the point?”

“So did you fuckers finally elope? Didn’t exactly explain why you disappeared for a week.” Al asked, feeling around for the remote.

“Oh my dear Althea, to elope we’d have to know we’re in love first. We just had a week long fuckfest and professed our undying love to each other while deep in the throes of passion. No, our elopement will be in a couple weeks time I’m sure.”

Al made a disgusted noise, “Every time you open your mouth, I wonder why I moved in with you.”

Logan dried off his hands and joined Wade on the sofa, arm slung around the merc while petting Mary’s tuft of fur, “Because without us, y’would have to spend y’social security checks on rent instead of gamblin’.”

Wade gasped dramatically, “Took the words right out of my mouth, Honey Badger!” He placed a wet kiss on Logan’s cheek.

Al finally found the remote and flicked on the TV, the beginnings of a Columbo episode appearing on the screen. The three settled in with Wade providing descriptions for Al. All the while the idea of eloping was floating round his head. Logan had already called him mate, surely proposing wouldn’t be that big of a leap. Sure they’d only been together for a few months but what’s that in the face of forever? Fuck it. About an hour later Laura arrived home, slinging her backpack onto the floor and slumping onto the couch beside Logan. Her head came to rest on his shoulder as she sighed in what Wade assumed was contentment.

“How was school, kid?” the elder mutant queried.

“Boring, a lot of things the classes are covering are things I was already taught at the lab. And I’m surrounded by people mostly a decade older than me.” Laura stated with a shrug, “No offence Papi, but I’m not going to ask how Canada was. I feel like I wouldn’t want to know what you and Wade got up to.”

Logan grunted his affirmation and took a swig of Dr Pepper. Where did that come from? He didn’t have that when he joined him on the couch. Did he grab it while Wade was distracted with thoughts of marriage? Again Wade wonders how someone who weighs four to five hundred pounds can be so stealthy.

“Anyone here have the energy to cook? Cause MJ knows I don’t after that car journey.” Wade asked, stealing some of Logan’s drink.

Al looked in Wade’s general direction, the old bat’s echolocation malfunctioning as always, “Michael Jackson?”

“Marvel Jesus you uncultured cretin.”

Logan breathed a long suffering sigh and stood up, passing his drink to Wade and making his way to the kitchen, “Come on kid. ‘Bout time I teach y’some basics.”

“Maybe you could show her how to bake a birthday cake as it’s October Twenty-Eighth as Belmounte is writing this line of dialogue,” Wade suggested off-handedly then turned towards a camera only he could see, “Which means it’s their Twenty-Eighth birthday today. They’ve been very slow in writing this chapter. They started it in early September.”

Logan flipped him off but mostly ignored the merc and pulled out shelf stable ingredients for spaghetti bolognaise. Laura, who had by now gotten used to Wade’s rambling, huffed a laugh. So much like her father.

“Maybe you should encourage them to do a time skip and get a move on then,” She responded before hopping off the sofa to help her Papi.

That night Wade struggled to get to sleep despite being wrapped in hunky tree trunk arms. Sure there were nights were he woke up to the wrong kind of penetration when Logan inevitably had one of his night terrors, but what’s the point of having a healing factor if he can’t stubbornly cuddle the traumatised bastard through it. This was not one of those nights, apparently being a non-stop fuck machine for a week with little sleep lead to sleeping like the dead when it’s over. No what was keeping Wade awake, despite his own personal weighted blanket, were the thoughts of being Mr Wade Winston Wilson-Howlett circling round his brain like a chunky vegetable soup down a drain. Shit he liked the sound off that far too much. Fuck it. He was going to do it. Wade was going to propose to the old timer. Hopefully there’d be no fatal diagnosis to ruin the occasion this time. And shit he’d need something other than a sentimental Voltron ring. Logan was a tad too serious and classy for that.

Wade carefully lifted Logan’s arm off his waist and slipped out of bed, if he was going to do this properly, he’s going to need the other’s ring size. He tiptoed out of their bedroom and down into the spare bedroom – which he had turned into an armoury and costume repair centre. He rifled through the drawers of his desk and pulled out his snail shaped tape measure and a pen then crept back to Logan. After a brief moment of reminding himself which hand was left and which was right, Wade gently wrapped the tape measure around the sleeping man’s ring finger. He jotted the measurement onto the back of his hand then deposited the items in his bedside drawer and crawled back into bed, snuggling back into Logan’s warmth. With his resolve made, the scent of pine trees, cigars, sandalwood and musk which had steadily been growing stronger finally sent him off to sleep.

Come morning, Wade was awoken to Logan placing a kiss on his forehead. He was already dressed in his grease monkey uniform with his backpack slung over a shoulder. God he loved how considerate Logan was, some people would wake up their partners when they woke but no Logan let him lay in, only waking him when he was ready to head out. Wade mumbled his greetings and well wishes, staying awake just long enough to hear Logan return them before promptly falling back asleep as Logan shut the bedroom door behind him. When Wade did actually wake, it was roughly in the afternoon. He stretched out, joints popping and clicking, then rolled out of bed padding barefoot into the kitchen. He scratched at his naked chest, nails catching on the valleys and ridges of his scarring. Laura stood over the stove and flipped the grilled cheese she was making.

“Mornin’ morra. That’s Spanish for ‘kiddo’. Apparently out of all the languages our Wolvie boy can speak, Spanish is not one of them for movie plot convenience.” Wade grabbed himself a bowl and poured in a mix of Lucky Charms and Unicorn Fruit Loops. He wanted to have a theme for the start of his day if his Pinky Pie lounge pants were anything to go by. He added the milk then sat down at their dining table. Look not every meal is had in front of the TV. And it’s useful for board games night.

“Buenas Wade. Any plans for today?” Laura greeted, checking the underside of her sandwich to see if was to her liking.

Wade swallowed his mouthful, “Actually yes, I do and I’ll need your help.”

Laura grunted in satisfaction and transferred her grilled cheese onto a nearby plate, “Who’s the target?”

“Your Papi, I’m going shopping and need your opinion on an engagement ring,” Wade said simply with a shrug.

The ketchup Laura had been artistically serpentining over her sandwich suddenly jetted onto the counter top in an eruption.

“¿Qué? ¿Compromiso? ¿Le propusiste matrimonio a papá en Canadá? ¿O papá te propuso a ti?” Laura took a breath and wiped up the mess with a sponge, “Is that why you went to Canada for a week? Some sort of romantic get away.” Once the counter was clean she joined him at the table.

“Not quite. More like because your Papi is from another universe he has certain biological impulses that he doesn’t want you to be witness to. And while we were away he said a certain word that in his universe pretty much meant he sees me as his life partner. The Brits in the Omegaverse must have it tough cause its a way to address even a complete stranger in slang. How are they supposed to know when their partner is being serious?” Laura stared at him blankly, “Ah, I’ve been side tracked. Whoops. Circling back, I figured, why not y’know? Now seems like a pretty good time to shoot my shot and I rarely miss Mini Wolvie.”

Laura took a bite of her grilled cheese and hummed happily, “And you need my help to choose a ring?”

“Thought it’d a good bonding experience as future step-father and daughter.”

“No pawn shops.”

Wade held up three fingers to his temple, “Scouts honour.”

About two hours later, after Wade got ready to go out in the baggiest hoodie he could find, they found themselves in a small family owned jewellers after nearly every other one turned them away. Seemed like this was the only place willing to work with the adamantium ore Wade had stolen from the TVA when no one was looking. See, the ring had to be adamantium otherwise Logan’s kitty claws would slice through it like a hot knife through butter. But this little independent business agreed with no questions asked as long as Wade was willing to part with a small chunk of cash on top of the asking price for a custom design. A design Laura helped him to settle on, as well as a design for himself. Sadly, with them being custom designs, the proposal would have to wait until the rings were completed. For Laura’s silence until the deed was done, Wade bought her some gelato. As many scoops and flavours as her heart desired. And perhaps he had promised her that she could accompany him on the odd job here and there if she was feeling particularly cooped up or angry.

In the meantime, Wade officially returned to mercenary work. Sister Margret’s was now owned by Buck after Weasel had finally pissed off someone with enough criminal connections to make him leave the country. So Wade would mosey on down to the bar and collect his little gold card with the necessary intel on his target then dispatched of them and any goons. But only if the target was subject to his new moral standards. After all, what would Spiderman do? Kill the unredeemable fucks as long as they weren’t his friend. Seriously, Harry gets Gwen killed and Peter let him live but he kills the Electro for trying to syphon New York’s power supply, how was that fair? All of that and the kid wasn’t even getting paid; unlike Deadpool who was getting enough from each hit to only need to take up a mission about once or twice a week. Which was a good thing because most criminal activity started in the evening when Logan would get home from work, meaning on work nights Wade would not have seen his man for the whole day. That makes for a cranky much more violent and efficient Deadpool who just wanted to get home.

Wade had completed two assignments by the time he got the call to collect the rings. It was a Saturday. Perfect. Logan was at work so he could step out and grab them without worry then Logan had the following day off. Also meant Laura didn’t have classes. Wade threw on one of the iconic flannel shirts owned by his beloved, the lingering scent making his shoulders relax as the tension he hadn’t realised he’d been holding seeped from them. Lately being away from Logan put him on edge. With a quick “See ya” to Al and Laura, Wade clipped Mary’s leash to her collar and caught the subway to a stop that was just a short walk away from his jeweller. Yes, they’re his now because the rings they handed over to him were exactly what he asked for. And fuck it he was going to pull out all the stops for this non-public proposal. Public proposals are a type of manipulation tactic, that is a hill he is very willing to die on. One he nearly did die on with the cancer pre-mutation actually. A quick Google Maps search showed him where the nearest wine merchant was which he made his next stop whilst he was out.

By the time he returned to their apartment, he had a sleeping Mary Puppins under one arm and a bag of various bits and bobs under the other. The items included Cava de Paraje Calificado – also known as the superior Spanish take on Champagne, confetti for Laura and Al to throw, candles and candelabras and the things he needed to put together a very fancy charcuterie board. Setting Mary down in her bed, he unclipped her leash and put the bag on the counter. Wade strode into his room to grab the sound proofing device and handed it to Laura.

“I have about an hour to get everything prepared before Peanut gets home. Take this and go into Al’s room. If he says yes, I’ll text you the all clear and you gals come out with the confetti. If he says no… I’ll uh… take him on a walk or something and text you,” Wade explained, showing her where the power button was on the little machine.

Laura nodded her affirmative, expression serious like she had been given a critical mission – she had lightened up quite a bit now that she wasn’t in constant peril. Al, who had overheard the conversation, started to get up off the couch and gratefully accepted the younger woman’s help to stand.

“How about we continue watching Gilmore Girls? We won’t have those fuckers cynical commentary over it,” Al suggested, patting Laura’s arm affectionately.

Wade pouted, “My critique of Lorelai’s relationships and the example she sets for Rory is valid!”

Laura ignored him.

“Sounds like a plan.”

Wade huffed and got to work on making the living room a cosy den of romance because who the fuck enjoys their spread of meats and cheeses at a fucking dining table? Fucking no one that’s who. He fluffed the throw pillows, fixed the blankets and set out a delicate tablecloth he had picked when buying furniture for their shared home. He inserted his candles into the candelabras and strategically dotted them around the space, only to be lit when there was five minutes before Logan got home. The merc quickly popped into their bedroom to make sure he was ready for any explicit celebration they would surely have in private. Wade then headed into the kitchen and prepared the meats and cheeses. By the time he placed the artfully spread board in the centre of the coffee table, he had just enough time to light the candles and turn of the lights.

Wade stood by the couch, looking towards the front door, and wiped his hands on his thighs. Him, nervous? More likely then you’d have thought. The sound of jingling keys sliding into the lock made his heart skip a beat. This was it. The moment that will determine the path of their relationship. He doubted the rejection would break them, he knew Logan wouldn’t let that be a possibility. But that didn’t stop the queasy roiling in his stomach as the door opened to show a freshly showered Logan – he always showered at work after Wade chewed him out for tracking engine oil into the carpet, it was a bitch to get out. Logan shut the door behind him without turning, his head cocked to the side, brows furrowing in confusion.

“What’s all this, Darlin’? Y’bein’ sent off to take out a politician or somethin’?” Logan half joked, hand cuntily on his hip.

Wade gulped and reached into his pocket before dropping onto one knee. He opened the ring box revealing a total of four round rubies and black sapphires set flush into an adamantium band. Simple in design really but one he knew the older mutant would appreciate. Logan’s jaw fell slack, eyes wide in surprise.

“Logan, I know in the grand scheme of things we’ve only been together for what, five months?” Wade’s voice shook as he spoke, “But these five months have been the best part in my life for the last six years. And I want this for as long as I live. Which as we both know will be forever. In Canada you called me ‘mate’ so I’m pretty sure you want the same thing to. Now sadly, you can’t bite me on the neck and claim me in a bond as you would in your original universe, but in this one we have this little legally binding ceremony called a marriage,” Wade took a deep breathe, “James Logan Howlett, will you marry me?”

Logan closed the distance between them in a few long strides, joining Wade on the floor and cupped his face between his hands, “I know what a marriage is dumbass.” He stated bringing Wade into a scorching kiss that the merc reluctantly pulled away from as Logan chased his lips.

“So is that a ye-”

“Of course it’s a fuckin’ yes.”

Wade squealed in glee and took Logan’s left hand to slide the ring onto his finger. Logan was about to pull him into another kiss but Wade stopped him which made the older mutant growl in protest.

“Hold on, Peanut. There’s one for me too.” Wade fished the other ring box from his back pocket and gave it to Logan, “I’ll let you do the honours.”

Logan opened the box, fingers gently running over its contents. Nestled in red satin was another adamantium band but instead of rubies and black sapphires, it was inlayed with yellow and blue sapphires. He gingerly plucked the ring from it’s cushion as if he was afraid he’d somehow break it and gave it a closer inspection.

“Aren’t they gorgeous? The gems are lab grown, just like us. Did you know rubies and sapphires are made of corundum, just different trace elements resulting in different colour presentation? Oh the tumblr girlies could write paragraphs about the symbolism of these rings.” Wade babbled, needing to fill the silence.

Logan grasped Wade’s hand and slipped the ring onto his finger with a satisfied purr, “Can’t believe you beat me to it, Red.”

He went to pull Wade into a kiss and yet again Wade stopped him, “Wait, wait, wait. Hold your horses, Angel Baby. One, I’d like to share the good news. Two, I have spent the past hour setting up a nice romantic space for us to relax and enjoy. I just know that if you start tongue fucking me now all my efforts will go to waste and our apartment will burn down around us whilst your balls deep.”

That got a laugh from the older man. Logan placed a kiss on his temple and pulled him up to stand with him. Wade quickly shot a message off to Laura.

[💍🎊🎉]

The door to Al’s room was thrown open milliseconds later, Laura barrelling out of the room to tackle the pair into a hug before releasing them and throwing handfuls of confetti over them.

“Congrats, Papi! You better treat each other right.”

Al was slower as she waddled out, using her cane to locate were the trio were huddled. She threw up her confetti and to her credit, most of it went in the correct direction.

“No fucking on the couch you freaks. I don’t care if you are engaged now, that’s still a no cum zone.”

She was met with three different responses:

“Of course not Althea, we’re not animals.”

“¡Ew! ¡No necesitaba esa imagen mental!”

“Oh come on! Can’t we get a pass just this once?”

Three guesses as to who said what.

Wade handed Laura a wad of cash, “How about you, Al and Mary go on a girls night for a couple hours? Papi and I need alone time now.”

Laura made a disgusted noise but nonetheless retrieved Mary, her carrying bag and leash. Al looped her arm through Laura’s free one and shuffled out with her, suggesting they go to her regular bingo hall. Wade had a suspicion Al had a dealer there she was hitting up in secret. She hadn’t shown as many withdrawal symptoms lately. As the door shut behind them, Wade led Logan to sit on the couch and popped the cork on the Cava with baby knife. The cork went flying off and hit the ceiling then ricocheted to God knows where. They’d probably find it cleaning at some point during the week.

“I know we’re trying to be sober at the moment, Peanut, but this is a special occasion so I think we can make an exception for today.” Wade declared, pouring it into the flute glasses he had set out.

He handed the first one to Logan and clinked his against it in a toast as he sat beside him, squirming slightly. Wade grabbed a slice of Stilton and dipped it into one of the chutneys he had bought and popped it into his mouth.

“Oh that fucks,” he moaned and grabbed another piece, dipping it and offering it to his fiance.

Logan leaned forward and took the offering between his lips, teeth grazing over Wade’s fingers, eyes dark even in the candle light. He let out an appreciative hum and Wade’s breathe caught in his throat. Oh, his romantic efforts were going to be wasted weren’t they? Maybe he should’ve waited till after the romantic meal to propose. Wade gulped and reached for a piece of thinly sliced pancetta that had been rolled into a rose shape, only to have his hand playfully slapped away. The rose shaped meat was pressed to his lips, Logan’s eyes trained on them as he opened up to receive the offering. They continued like that, hand feeding each other, until the board was cleared. Their attentions now turned to their forgotten flutes of Cava. Wade couldn’t tell you how it tasted, entirely too distracted by the man beside him that he drained his glass in seconds. That got a chuckle from Logan who had been happily taking his time until his flute also ran empty.

Wade jumped in surprise when Logan stood up with a muttered “I’ll be right back.”

He watched as Logan made his way into their bedroom, heard him open drawers and shuffle things about before shutting them and returning. Logan carefully picked up the candelabra – which had been placed in the centre of the coffee table – and set it aside on a corner table. He took the now empty board into the kitchen and set the bottle of Cava on the floor beside the coffee table. To say Wade was baffled would be an understatement. What on earth was he doing? Cleaning? No if that was the case he wouldn’t put the bottle on the floor. Wade yelped then laughed as Logan lifted him off the couch, span him round then set him down on the coffee table.

“Why the change in seating, Honey Badger?” Wade giggled as he looked up at the other mutant.

Logan shrugged off his shirt, leaving him in his classic white under-shirt and jeans. His tags glistened in the flickering candle light, capturing Wade’s attention as Logan pulled them over his head and retrieved another pair out of his pocket. Wade’s throat went dry. He knew exactly whose those were.

“I found these in y’sock drawer when we were unpackin’. I don’t expect every vet to wear theirs with pride but y’could at least store them somewhere dignified.” He said, dangling Wade’s tags in front of him.

Wade shrugged and tried to keep his voice steady, feigning nonchalance, “Dishonourable discharge from the Special Forces. Not exactly my proudest moment.”

“I was quite glad to have found them. Meant I could do this.” Logan slipped his tags over Wade’s head, making the merc shiver when the cold steel slipped under the flannel collar and met his bare skin. He grasped Wade’s palm and placed his tags in his open palm. “Now y’do the same to me.” Logan leant forward and Wade did as instructed, giving him a peck on the lips as he did so. “This was how I wanted to claim y’, when the time was right. But y’just steam rolled ahead as y’always do.” His lips quirked into a smile that Wade could only describe as fond, no bite behind his words.

“If this is all you wanted to do, why did you sit me here? Could’ve stayed nice and comfy on the couch,” Wade asked, wrapping his arms around Logan’s shoulders.

Logan gave him that fucking wolfish grin, the one that caused his little fangs to glint in the flicking glow of the surrounding candles, “I believe we were forbade from fuckin’ on the couch. Althea said nothin’ about the coffee table bein’ a ‘no cum zone’, Princess.”

Wade moaned, his hands eagerly tugging Logan’s under-shirt up and over his head, “Oh you are an animal. Can the wedding be next week? Need you to wife me up ASAP.”

Logan shucked off his boots, jeans and boxers leaving him almost as naked as the day he was born were it not for his socks, which he had elected to ignore in favour of undoing the zipper of Wade’s pants. Wade lifted his hips So Logan could shimmy them down to his thighs while he followed the other mutant’s lead and shrugged off his – Logan’s – flannel. Logan’s hands froze on Wade’s muscular thighs, pupils pinned as his gaze was firmly locked onto the deep red thong that was doing a shit job at covering Wade’s raging hard on. A low rumble emanated from Logan.

“Does my big bad Wolvie like?”

Logan nodded, seemingly unable to form words as he fell to his knees – taking Wade’s pants the last of the way down with him – to mouth at the material on scarred hips. Wade instinctually threaded a hand into Logan’s hair when sharp teeth pinged the material against his skin.

“How do you want this Angel Baby? From the front, the back, cowgirl, pretzel, wheelbarrow, caboose, butter churner? I have a lot more ideas where those came from if you don’t like them. Oh! Would you like the panties to stay on or come off?”

Logan chuckled, trailing his tongue over Wade’s cratered abs, “Hmmm, I’ll keep those suggestions in mind for when we take this to our room. Right now though, where’s the fuckin’ lube?”

Wade let go of Logan’s hair to point over to a drawer in the corner table that he had moved the candles to. Logan turned, fishing it out with a triumphant grunt and wasted no time in popping the cap off to smother his fingers. With his free hand he hooked Wade’s thong to the side. Wade jolted when he felt two cold wet fingers circle his rim before pressing in. He tensed at first but Logan’s subtle scent of of pine trees, cigars, sandalwood and musk seemingly intensified and mixed with something heady making Wade relax. It was like even his smell could issue commands.

“Y’ve become so soft and pliant for me, Darlin’. Didn’t think that was possible with how tight y’were during the start of my Rut.”

“I thought my healing factor reset things like that,” Wade moaned, “All those months of you fingering my ass and I was tight as ever, but you get your cock in and suddenly you have an all access entry pass.”

Logan crocked his fingers and began thrusting and scissoring them inside the merc. Wade wiggled and squirmed on the table, Logan was so close to brushing against his prostate, just needed him to go that little bit deeper. The older mutant used his free hand to hold down Wade’s hips, stopping him from moving, and smirked. Wade groaned in frustration. That teasing fuck was doing it on purpose. Wade grasped Logan’s hair again and tugged Logan down into a slow yet demanding kiss. Four-hundred pounds of adamantium skeleton and relaxed muscles rested on top of him, the coffee table creaked in protest making Wade break away with a chuckle.

“Sorry Honey Badger, I think the table can’t support you. Guess we can’t have you on top of me like this- ah!”

Logan chose that moment to slip in a third finger and nail his prostate dead on, making Wade gasp for air, “We’ll make do.”

Logan’s scruff tickled his jaw as he trailed kisses and nips down his neck, continuing passed his collar bones on an oh so slutty path towards one of Wade’s nipples. Wade whined as Logan mouthed at the still surprisingly sensitive nub while his fingers continued to tease his prostate and stretch him out. Precum leaked from his twitching cock in a constant stream on to his cratered abs and against Logan’s stomach through the red lace where it was trapped. A particularly harsh nibble from Logan’s fangs had Wade groaning like the masochistic little whore he was as blood beaded up from the short-lived wound. Blood that was swiftly lapped up and smeared across to his other scar covered nipple to give it the exact same treatment. A forth finger slid in, Wade’s last shred of patience snapped as the stretch threatened to send him over the edge, heat rapidly building in his gut.

“Logan. Fuck- Enough foreplay. Need- ha- Need you. Gonna cum.”

Logan broke away with a wet pop, a trace of crimson on his smirking lips as he retracted his fingers. He placed Wade’s legs over his shoulders and raised to standing. The Alpha lined up his cock with Wade’s slick hole, “Not yet. Where can my mate cum?”

Wade tried to push onto him but a hand on his hip kept him in place. Not to mention the angle made it awkward. Reverse wheelbarrow, both a blessing and a curse. He keened in frustration and gave Logan the answer he knew he was waiting for, “On your dick.”

“Attaboy.”

Logan slid down to the root in one hard precise thrust that sent Wade careening over the edge, taut like a strung bow, his load shooting hot down his chest, neck and onto Logan’s dog tags with a punched out cry.

“That’s it Princess, just like that. Such a good boy for me,” Logan praised, a hand going to Wade’s still hard – Thank you healing factor –cock to wring the last dribbles of spend from him.

Sparks of oversensitivity bolted through his nerves, making him flinch and wriggle away from the touch. Wade’s eyes rolled back as Logan’s scent washed over him, once again lulling his muscles to relax. The Alpha withdrew until just his tip remained inside and thrust back in, hitting just a deep, setting a slow and deliberate pace. Breathy little “ah ah”s escaped from Wade every time he felt the bulbous head of Logan’s cock bumped against his prostate.

“Y’ve got another one in y’ for me don’t y’?” Logan cooed down to him.

Come on Wade, you’ve only gotten started, you can’t be reduced to a moaning mess already. The merc thought to himself.

“F-F-Faster.”

Wade reached behind him, gripping the table’s edge to stop him from sliding off it thanks to the table cloth. It creaked in protest beneath him, its rocking speeding up as Logan gripped Wade’s hips with both hands to pull the him into his thrusts. Wade crossed his ankles behind Logan’s head, tightening his hole around the Alpha and dragging a low moan from the both of them at the pressure. Fingers reached down to trail through the cooling cum on his chest, near enough folding Wade in two, the cock inside him hitting impossibly deeper. Wade looked down and saw those same fingers wrapped back around his cock slick and sticky and a very noticeable bulging in his stomach. That shouldn’t be physically fucking possible. Wade threw his head back with a whine, pleasure bleeding through his senses from both sides, overwhelming him too fast yet again. For fuck’s sake Wade is meant to be a good shot not a quick shot. Logan didn’t look like he would last much longer either, sweat beading in his hair line, breathing harsh as he stared down at where they were joined with pupils blown wide.

“Bet y’ would’ve taken my knot so well. So perfect for me. Love how well you take it. Need you to come again for me, Darlin’” Logan growled out before turning his head to sink his fangs into the meat of Wade’s calf.

The sharp sting of pain was what he needed to push him through the overstimulation and into his next orgasm, his vision going hazy as tears welled up and spilled over with his release which caught his cheek and the table this time. His nails scratched against the table cloth, tearing holes into it. He could distantly hear the wail he let out barely registering that it was him making that noise. Warmth flooded inside him as Logan buried himself as deep as possible, head falling back with his own porn worthy moan. Time slowed to a crawl. They stayed like that as they came down from their releases, catching their breath.

Eventually Logan gently lowered Wades legs to rest around his hips as he came to a kneel on the floor once more. Wade watched in a daze as the older man reached down to the Cava which had miraculously remained upright during their romp. Logan drank from the bottle directly in long gulps, Wade’s gaze fell to his throat, transfixed by the bobbing of his Adam’s apple, his own mouth suddenly feeling parched.

“Save some for me,” he breathed, voice scratchy.

Logan licked his lips, something mischievous flickered in his eyes as he raised a brow. He took a final swig and placed the bottle back down. Leaning down, he slotted his lips over Wade’s. Wade eagerly accepted what he thought was just a kiss but soon felt liquid slip into his mouth.

Logan pulled back with a grin, “That what y’wanted?”

Wade hummed in satisfaction and reached to pull his man back down. Just as their lips were about to meet once more, Logan swiftly turned his head and licked a stripe across the cum on Wade’s cheek.

“We’re not done yet Bubba. We’re just going to take this somewhere more comfortable.”

Logan pulled out, dragging a needy whine from Wade who was not emotionally ready for the empty feeling. So he was becoming clingy with his partner, sue him. You haven’t experienced the Wolverpeen and it’s life altering affects. As quickly as the emptiness settled in, Logan had scooped him up into a princess carry, long strides making short work of the walk to their bedroom. Wade was gently placed onto their shared bed.

“Wait right here, I’m going to tidy real quick. That thong better be off before I come back otherwise I’m tearing it off,” Logan instructed.

Wade saluted, “Sir, yes sir. Just so you know the Sonic Orb™ is in Al’s room bee tee dubs.”

My my, you finally finished the sex scene, why did that take you two whole months?

The curse. The readers saw my quick update but since then it seems trying to write this bit was really cursed. Minor injuries said my back injury would be fine after about two weeks but lo and behold even a month later that fucker was still giving me grief. And my fucking boiler broke man! What the actual fuck?

Yikes. Definitely don’t want to be you. Welp let’s get a move on. Come on. Can’t lift the curse until you finish what you started. Oh and reader, that thong got torn off.

Wade decided to take a week off from work – the upside of being your own boss – to celebrate their engagement. Took the girls out for a family meal, which was also a kind of apology meal for Laura and her sweet little nose. He may have forgotten about her sense of smell when her dad was fingering him. And obviously they announced the glorious news to the extended family (Vanessa and Co) which led to Buck shutting St Margaret’s for the day so celebrations could be held there. Of course, now that Wade had bagged Logan with a promise to be life partners, he couldn’t keep his hands off him when they were alone together. So it felt like a self-imposed torture when Wade returned to work.

It was meant to be a simple job to clear scumbags out of a warehouse near some remote forests up-state. Easy in and out that wasn’t too far from home. And to ease his newly acquired separation anxiety, he had one of Logan’s under shirts stashed away in one of his pouches which he had nabbed from the laundry basket before it could be washed. In fact, he had been trying to delay doing the laundry just so Logan’s scent lingered in their room for longer, it made him feel more at peace. But never mind that, back to the mission.

Deadpool picked the lock to the warehouse successfully, creeping through the halls to try and find the head honcho’s office. If he cut the head of the serpent first this whole thing would probably go a lot easier. However, when was luck ever on his side? He’s not Domino and he didn’t have her bullshit not power. The first door he tried triggered a fucking alarm. A quick glance around the room clued him into why it was alarmed, different limbs and organs stashed in jars on industrial shelving. This was either mutant related or human/organ trafficking, not good.

Deadpool heard a gun firing just in time to barely dodge, the bullet grazing his shoulder. He hissed at the scratch that quickly healed over, quickly unsheathing Baby Knife from his boot and flinging it into the nameless goons forehead. He didn’t know how many of these fuckwards there were here so no point in using his guns yet until he had thinned the herd a little. Deadpool retrieved Baby Knife and ran down an adjoining corridor, the thumping of multiple pairs of boots not far behind him. He needed distance and space if he was going to fight more than one dickhead at a time. Corridors weren’t very good if you wanted to dual wield katanas.

They must’ve had some sort of walkie talkie system since a lone bastard was running towards him with a knife. Idiot. You don’t bring a knife to a sword fight unless its to sneakily jab your enemy. Deadpool drew one of his golden girls (That’s what I call my katanas.) and twirled away from the incoming slash to respond in kind with a flourish. The goon collapsed to the ground, blood spraying everywhere in his decent as his head rolled away wetly.

“If the walls were white someone might mistake this for a children’s hospital,” Deadpool cackled, “Oh colour theory.”

He knew he should’ve staked out the operation before barging in but that would’ve meant spending more time away from home. And he was in no state to do. As Deadpool aimlessly zigzagged through the halls, cutting down approaching goons as he went, he felt his temperature rising. He was really starting to work up a sweat. He caught a few good shots as well, the bastards. Deadpool eventually staggered a large loading bay and a metal staircase leading up to an overhead office space. The light was on and he could just make out a figure moving about in there.

Bingo.

Deadpool leaped over the guardrail and took the steps two at a time. With the momentum he had built up he shoulder barged through the metal door and locked it behind him.

“Who the fuck are you?!” The balding man in a white suit yelled in a southern accent, pulling out a gun.

Deadpool held up a finger as he hunched over, trying to catch his breath. Fuck something was wrong. His temperature was still rising and his legs felt unsteady. He stood as tall as he could.

“Someone who needs your head to get paid. Goodbye bad guy number two-hundred-and-forty-seven,” He declared, trying to sound intimidating and hoping his voice wasn’t shaking.

Before the man could open fire Deadpool had whipped out his own pistol and shot him in the knee causing him to drop to the floor in agony. Deadpool climbed on top of his writhing form and, with his katana lined up nice and cleanly between his intended victims neck vertebra, sliced through ligaments, tendons and muscle to detach his reward. Banging on the door got his attention, the goons were trying to get in. Shit, can’t he get a moment to recuperate? Looking round, Deadpool spotted furniture he could barricade himself in with. He was in no state to try and make a daring escape. With maximum effort Deadpool pushed and dragged cupboards and a desk in front of the metal door.

Wade yanked off his masked and collapsed to the floor against some drawers, gasping for air, it felt so stuffy. He fished his phone out of a pouch and immediately called Logan who was quick to pick up.

“Logan,” he panted, “Something’s wrong with me. I’ve blocked myself in the head office but I’ve got fuck-os trying to get in. I need evac now.”

“I’ll head out now, text me the location. Hang on tight, Princess.” Came Logan’s voice from the device, low and reassuring.

“My knight in yellow armour.”

Wade promptly hung up to send his location. With a sigh, he leaned back and just tried to relax despite the people trying to break in to kill him. They wouldn’t be successful in murdering him but their attempts wouldn’t exactly be pleasant, especially with how run down he was beginning to feel.

And that’s when he felt it. A trail of slick running down his thighs emanating from his hole.

“Fuck.”

What no Logan segment?

Next chapter will be entirely his POV don’t fret. All shall be fair.

And that cliffhanger?

Mwahahahaha!

[killkaramazov]

This will be my worst post but fuck it. If you’re absolutely DETERMINED to take it there then Smerdy/Ivan absolutely BODIES Alyosha/Ivan in terms of narrative/characterization/dynamic/motif and theme/basically everything else that matters. But it is really not about that for the vast majority of people who are deadass about shipping yaoi from a Russian novel published in 1879. All the IvanYosha stuff seems like it’s really more about getting your rocks off on AO3 and drawing two conventionally attractive anime twinks kissing. To which I wonder why you wouldn’t pick literally any two characters from any media for that unless you’re just into incest or something. 

I really love the Grand Inquisitor kiss! And I don’t like seeing it interpreted that way! 

On the other hand something that drives me insane about my personal interpretation of the book is the juxtaposition between the Alyosha Ivan kiss vs Ivan’s general disgust for Smerdyakov. Why is Alyosha kissing Ivan a pure, innocent expression of Christian love for all humanity but Smerdyakov’s gesture of love (killing Fyodor) is something so perverse and horrifying? It shows us something about their station of life through the roles and the acts that are even allowed to them in the narrative.

As far as SmerdyIvan goes I am reminded of the JSTOR article I read (that I now cannot fucking find) where the author mentioned an idea that all of Dostoevsky’s novels center around or contain one central taboo that is so unspeakable that it is scarcely even outright mentioned, and that the central taboo in question in TBK is that Smerdyakov is the fourth brother.

Incest is already gotten into in canon and much has been written about this, especially regarding Dmitry and Fyodor’s rivalry over Grushenka, but also with Ivan falling in love with Dmitry’s ex. So even though we are going far afield from authorial intent, it is really not that much of a jump to start looking at emotional incest from other angles within the family, as we already know literally every other type of abuse was already occurring within that (entirely fractured) family unit. As far as I am concerned regarding authorial intent, any claim you want to make about a work of fiction is fair game as long as you can justify it with evidence from the text, and people have been writing academic articles and essays making wild inferences from this text for the last 150 years, so I defend my right to make this interpretation. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, if Freud can diagnose Dostoevsky as bisexual we can say whatever we want about this book.

We know from the canon indisputably that Smerdyakov is unhealthily attached to Ivan, and we know that some vague thing about Smerdyakov sets Ivan’s Geiger counter for rancid horrific disgusting vibes to 10 immediately, anytime they are on the page together. So we can infer a lot from that.

Smerdyakov was literally born of sexual violence, and is a pariah in terms of his gender expression and sexuality, so him taking on the role of someone with a warped sexuality in the narrative just sort of… follows, in terms of the novels concern with the idea of inherited sin. 

There is something compelling to me about the idea that Smerdyakov would seek entrance into the Karamazov family in another, weirder way psychologically through attaching highly inappropriate feelings to Ivan. (‘If you think of me and my feelings toward you as incestuous, then that means you have acknowledged me as a family member’) 

And regardless of what I literally just said about authorial intent, Dostoevsky outright tells us how gay Smerdyakov is like every single time he’s on page. So there is also that.

Their relationship appeals to me greatly insofar as it is utterly disgusting and that’s my jam. There is lots to explore in this dynamic but one indisputable thing baked into the text between them is that it’s literally impossible to imagine any truly romantic union between them simply because of the way they both are. They repulse each other far too much for any expression of that sort. The actualization of their inappropriate relationship is not a culmination through an even vaguely romantic or sexual encounter, instead, it is the fulfilling a murder pact. 

They are like two oppositely charged magnets or something, in turns attracting and repulsing one another, pushing and pulling on each other’s gravitational pulls. Regarding the Tchermashnya-Moscow conversation, the way that their conversations are in doublespeak, with words said out loud and then literally entire other sentences written out in thought and illustrated through description of physicality, is incredibly fascinating to me. They seem to be literally communicating telepathically.  I am reminded of another JSTOR article I read that mentions the Dostoevskian doubles “exerting influence over one other that cannot be explained in any literal sense.”  The only reason they can communicate like this is because they are doubles, and this doublism is reinforced again in the narrative by their being fake twins, the same age but born to different mothers. 

They are each other’s shadows, they share a consciousness on some level, or access each other’s consciousnesses at different times through this shared plot in a way that seems incomprehensible to both of them. And Smerdyakov, in my own interpretation and opinion, as someone who is completely starved for any kind of positive regard, takes this for love. Whether that’s familial or otherwise or both. 

They engage in this mutual seduction towards an ultimate goal or realization: Ivan presents the idea, that “all is permitted” and that perhaps it would be for the better if Fyodor were dead, and Smerdyakov takes his lead from this and in turn pulls Ivan into the murder plot. Their relationship is romantic insofar as they are seducing one another in turn towards this unspeakable and forbidden act that they both desire: the murder.

They deny it right to each others faces, only Ivan’s is an earnest denial, to himself first and foremost, and to Smerdyakov it’s just sort of… foreplay. Like, “we’re just two clever people who are only saying this because we have to, and we get it, and you’re in this with me.” 

There is something really compelling too in the fact that Ivan is on board with the murder plot in one scene on a subconscious level, but later will utterly deny that any of this ever happened or that he ever felt that way. He has expressed and betrayed a desire that is so deviant, so forbidden, and so distressing to him that he has a psychological break over denying that that could have truly been something he wanted. Ivan expresses overwhelming disgust and disdain through the entire book, mostly towards Smerdyakov, but finally towards himself when he is forced to the realization of the role he has played as the idealogical murderer. Whereas Smerdyakov, the more active pursuer in their relationship, is not ashamed of his desires and is the one who ultimately has the lack of inhibition required to carry out The Forbidden Act. 

Ivan is attracted by Smerdyakov initially, despite himself, for reasons he can’t understand, like one is drawn to a cataclysmic disaster of fate in a Greek tragedy or something, and ultimately it descends into complete loathing on both sides, kills Smerdyakov, and mocks Ivan’s entire character by undermining his self concept and his entire value system and laying utterly bare his fatal flaws as a human being. Utterly doomed and hopeless relationship in every single way! 

Alas, no one wants to match my freak about this and that is definitely for the better. If I had to see ship art of them kissing anime style I would kms. Whatever the fuck they had going on is way better. 

[cushfuddled]

I saw your Sherlock post from a couple of weeks ago just now and lol greetings from the other direction. The show died for me in season 3 when Sherlock tricked his only friend into thinking they're about to die in an explosion so John HAS to forgive Sherlock for... what is ultimately another mean trick against that friend (Reichenbach), which Sherlock didn't do to save John/Mrs. Hudson/Lestrade since Mycroft had that covered, but only because he thought John would blab. AauuuGGGHHHH.

DUDE I am passing you an "I survived Sherlock BBC" T-shirt through the screen.

Also.

YOU'VE ACTIVATED MY "SHERLOCK BBC IS A TOXIC YAOI SIMULATOR" TRAP CARD! WOE, A SHERLOCK BBC VENT BE UPON YE!

What pisses me off is that, like, Moftis could've leaned into the bullshit at least. They could've made it a CHOICE.

IMO Sherlock BBC was a horror story about homophobia and codependency. Moftis made it very clear that John is "addicted" to conflict; to danger; to Sherlock. Throughout the show John furiously stresses his heterosexuality to anyone who'll listen. He breaks himself to conform to a "normal life" with a woman and a child and a steady job. But he can only play pretend for so long. I'll never recover from that wildly on-the-nose scene where John goes to sleep next to his wife and dreams about Afghanistan (a parallel to the first scene of episode one) and his life with Sherlock.

SHERLOCK (in the dream): Seen a lot of injuries, then? Violent deaths? JOHN (in the dream): Enough for a lifetime. (In the Watsons’ bedroom there’s a pounding sound nearby, as if someone is knocking on the front door.) SHERLOCK (in the dream): Want to see some more? JOHN (in the dream): Oh, God, yes. (The banging sound comes again and John jolts and sits up in bed. Half asleep, in his mind’s eye he can see Sherlock looking intensely at him.) SHERLOCK: The game is on. (He smiles.) (John wakes up properly and throws back the covers.)

This transcript neglects to mention the shot of John ripping his hand from his wife's as he races out of the bedroom. He throws the front door open, and expresses clear disappointment when it's not Sherlock on the other side.

John DESPERATELY wants to be a normal heterosexual dude with a normal heterosexual marriage, but he can't escape his nature.

SHERLOCK (louder, talking over her): John, you are addicted to a certain lifestyle. You’re abnormally attracted to dangerous situations and people … (his voice becomes quieter again) … so is it truly such a surprise that the woman you’ve fallen in love with conforms to that pattern? (John grimaces briefly and then, with his eyes still fixed on Sherlock, he points towards his wife at the other side of the room.) JOHN (his voice full of suppressed tears): But she wasn’t supposed to be like that. (Mrs. Hudson looks across to Mary in shock. Mary lowers her head.) JOHN (to Sherlock, pointing again across the room, his voice a little stronger): Why is SHE** like that? (Sherlock looks away towards the sofa wall for several seconds and then turns to look directly into John’s eyes.) SHERLOCK: Because you chose her. (John stares back at him, his face unreadable. Sherlock holds his gaze. Finally John turns away, speaking conversationally.) JOHN: Why is everything … (he walks towards the dining table, holding up a questioning hand and shrugging) … always … (his voice raises to a loud shout) … MY FAULT?! (He furiously kicks one of the dining chairs across the floor. Mrs Hudson jumps and flails. Even Sherlock jumps a little, but Mary remains still.)

**The unspoken sentiment here is "I did all this to get away from you/what you represent. Mary was supposed to be normal. She was supposed to make ME normal. So why did she turn out to be just like you?" And of course Sherlock goes, "Because you are YOU, and YOU chose her." No matter how hard John tries to be a different person with different needs, at the end of the day he's still John Watson, and John Watson can't help but want what he wants. As furious as he is at Sherlock and Mary, John is ultimately more furious with himself for his inability to shapeshift into a "normal" man who doesn't need the war/Sherlock.

As the series went on, it got harder and harder for me not to read John's outbursts as him taking out his self-hatred/internalized homophobia on Sherlock. John fucking HATES how much he loves Sherlock. He HATES that he needs Sherlock in his life. He HATES that he couldn't find happiness with a normal life and a normal wife. Sherlock tore John's shot at normalcy away from him. He is the face of everything John can't stand about himself. And so we end up with this:

And then...holy fuck, Sherlock's not exactly a ray of sunshine either. Like you pointed out, a part of Sherlock enjoys putting John through these cruel, elaborate life or death simulations. It would've been easy to construe a scenario wherein Sherlock HAD to keep John out of the loop post-Reichenbach, but Moftis opted for a much more fucked up timeline where Sherlock let John believe he'd committed suicide for years because he...kinda wanted to fuck around Europe on his own for a while? Or didn't trust John to put on a good show?

I can massage the story enough to like, come up with a kinder excuse. If John were to find out about Moriarty's web he'd bite and claw his way to Sherlock's side like he always does, and that would put John's life (even more) at risk (a la Sherlock's eventual capture). Maybe on some level Sherlock understood John's desire to escape, too, and thus opted to "free" John from his leash.

It's more difficult to soften Sherlock's decision to reenter John's life when/how he did.

If memory serves...since the show premiered, Sherlock seemed like he was always on the lookout for new and creative ways to hurt himself (whether on John's behalf, for the sake of "the game," or as a kind of release valve).

Sherlock's constant need to sacrifice (or punish) himself conflicts with his hunger for John's approval. Sherlock would die for John's happiness...but he also needs John around to make him feel smart/loved. He likes to keep John in the dark until the last possible second—to put John in situations that leave him totally at Sherlock's mercy/dependent upon Sherlock's brilliance—to more or less blunt force engineer these moments of awe and intimacy. He's addicted to John as much as John is addicted to Sherlock, and sometimes that manifests in grand gestures of selfless devotion...and sometimes it manifests in fucked up manipulation games that reassert John's dependence on Sherlock/Sherlock's control over John's life.

So yeah. It's all very fucky IMO. And I wouldn't have suddenly loved the show if Moftis had leaned into that reality, but at the very least I'd have felt a lot less gaslit lmao. Sherlock BBC beat me over the head with the toxic yaoi paddle only to scream at me, "THEY'RE BEST FRIENDS AND THEY WERE MADE FOR EACH OTHER AND YAY AREN'T YOU HAPPY THEY'RE SUCH A GREAT TEAM YAY IT'S ALL GOOD THEY MADE UP AND THEY'RE GOOD NOW IT'S GOOD FOREVER AND EVER YAY!"

Like I'm sorry, but that finale was not a happy one. It wasn't even bittersweet. It was tragic. Mary literally ends the show with, "Who you really are doesn't matter. It's all about the legend." Sherlock and John represent a refuge to people, Mary says. Their story represents hope. We're told the manipulative, miserable, codependent mess of Sherlock and John's reality "doesn't matter." What matters is the front they present to their audience. If I thought this doublespeak was intentional, I would've applauded Moftis for their commitment to the bit at least. It takes balls to look at a legendary package deal like Doyle's Holmes and Watson (I cannot stress enough how cottage-core soft these two are with each other) and say, "What if I made that relationship super fucked up?" But the whole show stinks of empty promises, like Moftis MEANT to tell a story about a fraught but ultimately beautiful (platonic) partnership. What we GOT was a gay horror story about two very traumatized guys who couldn't escape each other's gravitational pull. I mean...pick a lane. Don't TELL me these two love each other like a couple of pals and then SHOW me John catapult between yearnful dreams of Sherlock's face and like, punting Sherlock's broken body into a wall of metal lockers.

Okay, rant over HHHHHHH

[lesbian-kyoru]

i love all your fruits basket fanfics!!

what do you recommend watching after?

i feel like nothing could ever compare 🥺

nana was my favorite anime before furuba

thank you so much that’s so sweet!! and it’s funny you mention nana, because that’s been my big hyperfixation of 2024 lmao. i hope you’re okay with recs for manga as well as anime since i tend to read more than i watch. my biggest recs if you enjoyed furuba would probably be:

chihayafuru: a sports manga about three childhood friends and the ways their lives intersect. very complicated, engaging characters and an equal focus on platonic and romantic love (mostly lmao). the anime is 3 seasons and incomplete, but i HIGHLY recommend it as well as the manga! the emphasis on the interpersonal and coming of age themes is what draws me to it, similar to furuba

sand chronicles: after her mother’s death, a young girl navigates grief, love, and growing up. from that summary i feel like the parallels to furuba are very apparent, but i was so touched by the depiction of grief and mental health in this story, and i really cared about all the characters. the MC is one of my favorite female MCs in all of shoujo now! i don’t believe it has an anime but the manga is so worthwhile

skip and loafer: basically high school slice of life but with some of the most devastating, careful character writing you’ve ever seen! i love the emphasis again on platonic love and romantic love in this series, along with its very nuanced portrayals of queerness/aromanticism & reckoning with what romantic attraction even feels like. the anime is only 1 season but the manga is a must read, it’s like a warm cup of soup

boys over flowers (anime/manga): this is a controversial pick but if you love stuff that is insane and camp, BOF is a must-watch. poor girl goes to a rich school and all the rich guys get obsessed with her but also bully her. imagine if all the goofier tropes & potential cliches in furuba weren’t subverted……then you would have BOF. but like it’s FUN. i do unironically love the female MC because she is a bitch but she’s MY bitch. the boys are horrible but i love them as well

(added because I thought of it after posting) heaven official’s blessing: feels silly to rec since tgcf is literally so popular BUT i need to make the case for how hualian, the main ship, are sooooo yaoi kyoru! just trust me!! the animated series has two seasons and then the novels are truly a delight. if you’re looking for that same romantic high that reading kyoru’s story for the first time gives, you absolutely need to experience hualian. impeccable mixture of centuries of yearning + the simplicity of enjoying each other’s company

i hope these recs are helpful! and as a general starting point a lot of 90s-2000s shoujos may scratch that furuba itch for you as well!

[vhaos-chaotic-writing]

Another Vocaloid song that I am relating to Transformers - this time, for the Tranformers Earthspark series. Not gonna lie, I haven't 100% watched the show, but of course, my obsession for Starscream had me watching the youtube compilation videos or tiktoks about all the scenes he was on. And this time, centering on the MegaStar side...

( ‵▽′)ψ ~

HURTING FOR A VERY HURTFUL PAIN (EZFG ft. VY2 & VY1)

WARNING: The following post and music video may contain topics about toxic relationships, PTSD, etc.

So - yeah, the ultimate Toxic yaoi - Megatron and Starscream. I've always been so into their dynamic and how truly dysfunctional-destructive they can be to one another. But something is clear, and thanks to the Earthspark series for bringing up that topic - there has always been a power imbalance with the two of them, being Megatron the last one to truly give the final punches to the seeker and more than that; and for Starscream (both fairly and unfairly) having his trauma and situation invalidated by others.

Like, I saw a video on youtube that analized the whole episode where Starscream gets to interact (and connect) with Hashtag, and I was dead ass when the guy on the video pointed out how Starscream kept seein the Decepticon's mark on Megatron even when it was long gone and replaced by G.H.O.S.T's insigna and that it would always appear whenever Megatron was beating him in the fights.

And you can see Starscream's fear. And you can see his fear in any other variation of his - Starscream's behaviour comes from constant abuse and his taken 'hurt others if you want to survive' ideas.

(LET MY BABYGIRL GO!!) (╯‵□′)╯︵┻━┻

And of course, not only is Starscream the one suffering. Megatron is also suffering - my man over here trying to change after realizing he has been doing things wrong, but things are so complicated and you can see he gets hurt each time he gets called traitor and such.

[ Yadda yadda, Vhaos - we understand this. Now, what about the Vocaloid song? ]

VY2 represents perfectly Megatron's point of view, while VY1 could be Starscream.

"Don't come near, don't come here. Don't let it get you so excited - don't pay it any mind. Just stop shouting your head off. Go away, go away, yes - I'll be gone into thin air soon enough, so feign normalcy, and put up with it." - Starscream's taking his leave - "Nowhere is safe if it's with you."

"Oh, it hurt, the pain's so bad. Why does it hurt so bad as this? Ah, I want to tell you how much it hurts. I want you to be the only one to know. Oh, it's awful, so very awful. Why does it feel so bad as this? I want you, it's you I want. The pain is right here in my chest..." - potential "Megatron realizing he loved Starscream but both had become toxic and he has partaken the abuser's role more than nothing."

And now take the minute 1:50 to the very end of the video - a sparkbreaking where Megatron realizes about everything, but it is overwhelming. And thinking when Starscream leaves that pain in his chest is going to leave - Starscream is free, free from the abuse he has inflicted on him for so long, therefore, he will be free to... then why does it hurt so much? Why hasn't the pain left?

After all, both have been hurting for a very hurtful pain.

Potential angsty fanfictions, yes yes. (๑•̀ㅂ•́)و✧

Leaving the video about Starscream PTSD - good soup.

(●'◡'●) Ending my rambling here because I feel I've lost my own narrative thread and I am too delulu rn - Vhaos out!

[mbat]

i literally read the book of bill days ago but its only now kinda hitting me how fucked ford and bills whole thing was though cause ford literally talks about being so unable to sleep (to try to keep bill away), and when sleep inevitably caught up to him, he would wake up to his body abused and things messed with and he just couldnt seem to find an escape (and he literally didnt get to truly escape until 30 years later)

(also keeping people awake for unhealthily long periods of time is another tactic used to mess with and control people because of how it impairs brain function)

listing off the things we see in those few pages in the book of bill:

i mean, punching and scratching at a steel door for hours would be so damaging to your hands and probably hurt like hell for at least 2 days after. then bill says he was hitting fords head against a wall, though its said in a post-it as if its a joke, but he also isnt exactly above doing that, and honestly he says most things like its a joke.

i also dont need to say 'bill really doesnt know how to take no for an answer' because he makes that very clear in literally any interaction we see with him.

bill literally puts a venomous snake near ford while fords asleep, which could have killed him if he wasnt lucky+skilled enough to deal with it.

he nearly gives ford hypothermia, and in the same action actively threatens ford with the idea of making him jump off of a high spot, and like ford says, doesnt do it just so he can send a message to ford about how hes the one in control.

he gets ford in trouble with not only the law, but also with other people that are probably not very happy with him after. he mutilates fords body in several ways, and i dont think i need to go into detail on them because theyre... so ew. and he even exposes part of fords body to the world. like, its just taking his shirt off, but thats still showing off his body in a way that he didnt agree to or want

and then he attempts to (or purposefully fails to) call stan, using fords voice to threaten suicide and tell stan that ford never loved him.

and he punctuates it with a final power move, in a hallucination that he creates, hes messing with stans memories and making him feel like his body was basically about to implode

and like. okay, we all joke about toxic old man yaoi, and its a good joke and toxic old man yaoi is great and its an interesting ship, but holy fuck.

like. to say the absolute least, that had to be so, so deeply violating. its no wonder that when we see ford in the past, when he finally contacts stan, he looks like hes on the verge of shattering into a million pieces. he just went through, and still wasnt yet out of, some deeply abusive shit.

like... everything coming out lately both in this book and what ive heard is on the website, mixed with what we already knew from the show itself... the stans are both so, so fucking tragic dude. their whole lives were thrown away over things that really didnt even need to be the way they were, and then they both get into situations that are pretty damn screwed, and those situations follow them for the rest of their lives. its basically a miracle that things worked out in the end for them.

i dont really have a point, i just had to talk about all that. i read almost all of the book of bill in one sitting, and while i was really enjoying it, i was also getting kind of tired of sitting in one spot only doing this one thing for several hours straight. i still felt a lot of the emotional bits of it of course, but man this part specifically just really didnt hit me until now.

i mean, to say the absolute least, i know what its like to feel violated in a similar way, though not anywhere near to the extent of what he went through at all. someone get that man some therapy got damn

[wonderer399]

Antis are now playing their dirty pathetic game again...Their plan was to mass report shipper accounts while people are in their summer break! They mass reported our top 2 sebaciel shipper accounts!! Therefore these 2 Sebaciel shipper accounts are now permanently banned or deactivated !! They even flagged my recent sebaciel post out of pure hateful spite!!

I have been watching BB since 2012 ( I was like 14 at that time, almost same as Ciel's age and height ) and shipping Sebaciel as I have fallen in love with their love for each other...Sebastian is just soo perfect anime man in my eyes...I will defend Sebastian no matter what ... Sebastian is the best for Ciel's wellbeing....BB is my comfort anime which I truly adore and Sebaciel is the main purpose why BB have become such comfort anime of mine...mainly because of their complex dynamic of sebaciel!! Sebaciel is my happiness!! I never stopped shipping them...I like other yaoi ships as well but sebaciel is my comfort ship above all!

Antis live in the similar motto of 'Playing violent videogames like COD makes you a real life mass shooter'....if that's true then Japan and South Korea would beat the US charts in the mass shooting satistics....it is as same as 'Proshippers are pedophiles' stupid statement... Am I a pedophile then? I personally stay miles away from kids as I find them annoying...when will they learn that Fiction =/= Reality ?!?!

Antis call us 'Proshitters' ...we proshippers don't care what you call us ....If you don't like it, then you shouldn't engage with it . But don't ruin other people's happiness just because of your own personal morals, opinion and personal values. Everyone has their own personal freedom and rights , falsely accusing of someone then reporting to tumblr A.I. police LMAO!!

From the deepest respect of deactivated fellow Sebaciel shippers :

#1 @Lunerium

#2 @Cielconsumer

Fellow remaining loyal sebaciel proshippers, Please find a tumblr loop hole where you can restore these account or any actions against cyber bully? please let me know...

We need to Avenge Lunerium and Cielconsumer ....We need to stop this mess!! If this keeps happening someday I will get vanished too...Antis will start filliping tables when will they see canon sebaciel in green witch arc! We need to stick up for each other!

Thank you for listening to my ted talk !

[goldenbunniesxo]

i read the yuri zine hosted by @tshirt3000 and the piece specifically by Alexis TheSwordWizard (i cannot find your @ anywhere i am so sorry) actually changed my brain chemistry. it literally solved like, 90% of the debate i'd been having in my head about my gender?? and made me realise a part of why i am so obsessed with/fascinated by yuri-fying my favourite yaoi even though i am not neccessarily lesbian or trans (i think. just aro.) its truly such good analysis everyone should read it. the paragraph that especially stuck out to me was this one: “Putting femaleness on a pedestal holds us back in every regard. We get female characters that must fit into stereotypical boxes of “girl character” or else someone is trying to say that the typical (and frankly, stereotypical) image of womanhood isn’t good enough. Anything that shifts from stereotypical femininity is an inherent shift towards masculinity. It’s admitting defeat. But this really just limits womanhood."

Like specifically the part about "admitting defeat" is exactly part of what made me grapple so much with my desire(??) to present more masculine. like i am imprinting "female masculinity" onto my soul omd. and then also:

"Writing women, writing yuri, cannot be seen as something more limiting than writing men, and writing yaoi. We need to have room for play, for experimentation, and for alternate forms of femininity, for female masculinity as we do for masculinity, and for masculine femininity."

this made me realise why yuri used to feel more limiting or less interesting than yaoi. the sacrosant treatment of femininity.....lack of autonomy and interiority given to our treatment of female characters...but mainly how we don't allow ourselves the room for play through that....

and then finally this:

“I sacrifice their cisgendered maleness to project and grow myself into as an extension of what is a woman.”

LIKE WOW. YES. THIS IS EXACTLY IT??? sorry this is not be counteranalysing much this post is more for me but also to share with people how good this is because my god does this touch on cornerstones of my feelings and experiences lately.

[irlnorthshaw]

is your blog shador free? if so, whats your fav ship??

well anon i come bearing great news... my blog IS shador free !! there is a long story behind it which does include a 16 year old me on instagram getting harassed by the shador crowd BUT let's put that behind

moving on to ships i DO absolutely enjoy (not in order)

THE MIDFIELDERS

starting off w my absolute fav, they could never fail me. a dream come true would be to have an episode centred around them... 😁👍 i love their dynamic sm.

it makes so much sense why they're paired up together on the field, they have the perfect balance and dont take shit from everyone else

shakes/klaus

can't go wrong w a classic. have been a fan since day 0, they're so wholesome and i enjoy their back and forth more than shakes and el matador (yes... i did just say that)

i love shakes being the one to always have kalus' back, ESPECIALLY when everyone else doubted him. oh when he reassured klaus to not doubt himself bc he IS a great player is so... chefs kiss i love them

UPDATE: guys. the worst did, in fact, come. after this post i sat down and finally watched rookie season (which i havent done when i made this) and so now im aware of shakes and klaus'.... ambiguous age gap. this is truly my nightmare come true

SHAWDOR !!! (thats what ive named them at least)

this trope never fails me. adrenaline junkie dudebro with the self centered diva??? COUNT ME IN. TAKE ALL OF MY MONEY PLEASE.

klaus w literally anyone

i really cant blame them, i too love klaus 😋 i like these two ships especially, i don't dive into them as often BUT I WILL BE SEATED !!

onto the other teams AND cross-team ships

these two are for sure crack ships BUT yk me... i will literally consume anything given to me, without a doubt. there's definitely more than i can think of. im starting to really like dingaan and klaus BUT i havent ventured into them as much.

but these two? wow... 10/10 i love it and i need more of it. Im STAAAARVING

psstt uber and skarra got me feeling some type of way... emotionally unstable height difference? a tear fell down my cheek

uber/ja nein

can you blame me? they're literally perfect. jock/nerd w a bit of spice... i am always sat whenever an episode has these two. god bless "man in the iron tank mask" 🙏🙏

dingaan/skarra

ANOTHER CLASSIC !! they're literally shakes and klaus but like... the evil counterparts 😭😭

UPDATE: dingarra is lame.

AND THAT'S ALL!!!

that i can remember....

there's definitely more that i haven't thought abt. Including coach ships (i definitely have one or two, i AM a big fan of old man yaoi) AND my beautiful yuri ships... i will continue in another post then 😋👍

thank you anon for this opportunity to gush abt shipping... its what i live to do 🫡