#yall they dont look stable rn

[farceurcole]

STARL-L-IGHT~ WE JUUSSST KNEW YOU’D SEE THINGS OUR WAY~EHEHEHEHEHEHE!!!

[not-goldy]

Saw a Bi discussion on your blog.

This has nothing to do with Jikook nor asks but my doubt.

I've seen videos of Bi women in stable relationship with other women. They mightve dated men before, but have seen them saying they don't wanna be with a man when they can have women. Makes sense given how trashy majority of men are rn. Even seen gay man and straight women agreeing they wish they were attracted to women coz men around them are so disappointing . But I've NEVER seen a Bi man being in a relationship with man. I've seen them hooking up or even cheating their gfs with a man but not a commited relationship. Probably because of same logic, idk if anyone will choose a man if they can be with women. Coz from many people's dating or life experience, women!>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Men

What do you think.

Dont you think you are being Silly?

Think of it this way

There are 8 billion people on earth

You don't know up to a 100 of them to be making these generalized assertions.

There are literally countless bisexual men who dated women and even now are proudly dating or married to men.

Are these a joke to you???

Are all these gay marriages a joke to you???

You see married gay men and you think all same sex couples are gay is that it?

You see hetero couples and you think all of them are straight couples is that it???

Your problem is viewing everyone and everything through a binary lens. Insufferable

You are intelligent enough to understand that perpetuating these harmful stereotypes of Bisexual individuals is a form of oppression. Can you stop?

People like what they like.

Bisexual means you end up either in a hetero dynamic or gay dynamic endgame. It doesn't change the fact you can and might still be attracted to men or women.

So while you are here saying all these I'm also looking at all the same sex marriages and wondering if they are bisexuals you are wrongfuly labeling as gay.

The discrimination against Bi men is real.

And it's funny how some straight women also shun Bisexual men and refuse to date them because they fear they are just gay men toying around with girls. So which is it? Do Bi men exist or do they not exist?

If they date men yall tag them as gay and use that to validate your fears about bisexual men.

If they date women then yall weaponize that into a hateful rhetoric.

To rubbish your claim, I'll challenge you to think this way,

Bi sexual men can date bisexual men

Bi sexual men can date non binaries

Bisexual men can date Trans

Bisexual men can date gay men

men CAN date and marry OTHER men.

If any of that dynamic is valid then them dating women is just another possible permutation of that sexuality not the be all of it.

You cant possibly tell me there aren't bisexual men with Trans, nonbinaries, or gay men- broaden your horizon the world does not start and end in your front yard.

[deliveringspookzandtreatz]

welcome to the marco verse page this is basically a "hey this is what he would be in different universes" and some backstory for them so yall dont feel restricted with just plain marco! also i did this so it wouldnt get too long.. each verse has their own tag too!! full refs will be linked on here when im done but you can have silly doodles of them rn!

"#i think he lost his mind" An alternative spooky month verse where after he got attacked by bob he sorta got VERY paranoid and thought lots of people were out for him so he became a killer. He always has his axe right beside him justttt in case

"#Thats how the cookie crumbles | Cookierun verse" A new cookie is here and he doesn't remember a single thing! Just woke up near a kingdom and is completely clueless about everything. He goes by haybale or just hay in this verse

"#as they say letsa go! | Super mario verse" Marco turned into a boo and he doesnt know how to deal with it. hes a pretty sweet lil guy who keeps to himself and tries not to bother anyone

(he was cute so he get colored) "#Bunny itsa bun | Kirby verse"

Welp he turned into a bunny and was sent into a comfort game of his. he doesnt look happy but dw hes happy

#Those damn beavers! | AngryBeavers verse AN ANGRY BEAVERS UNIVERSE MARCO!! basically Hes just the same as his canon verse just with a few tweaks. Hes much more mentally/financially stable than his canon part and his job is more chill even if he still works as a mail carrier

im gonna edit this alottttt... shhhhhh

[abyssal-cryptid]

Even more Tears of the Kingdom thoughts (SPOILERS)

I cant figure out how long after Calamity this game is set. It's got to be at least some years, everyone else has changed but Link and Zelda

Link and Zelda have lived this time together in Link's house in Hateno <<33

Their Well holds Zelda's secret room

Also yes every well in this game has something so my favorite thing rn is just jumping into wells

Zelda had a school built to Hateno because she loves kids

I hate how so many people in this game who should know who Link is dont know him

You mean to tell Ive been living in Hateno for years and no one recognises me

Zelda is still referred to as princess which implies she hasnt allowed herself to be crowned queen

Ive spent like three hours just strolling in Hateno

I did get the camera and my enjoyment of the game has increased tenfold

HATENO TECH LAB HAS A RUINED GUARDIAN I REPEAT HATENO HAS A GUARDIAN REMAIN

Im so excited I missed seeing these everywhere

Purah's room has drawings of them and the divine beasts

You can just pick up the koroks who need to be reunited w their friends with ultrahand and carry them wherever they want to go. They also roll down hills

Me @ the forbidden ruins in Kakariko: "Let me in, let me innnn"

SIDON HAS A FIANCE

IM SO DISTRAUGHT

THEY SAW US SHIP LINK AND SIDON AND WENT "none of that here is his gf"

HUDSON HAS A DAUGHTER <<33

This game has cheese. I can die happy now

I am taking the elevator up every time I see a falling rock

Went to Akkala Citadel Ruins. Was looking at the views. SUDDENLY EVERYTHING GOES RED AND HANDS ARE CHASING ME WHAT THE FUCK

The way they dont let my boy have his long hair out on any fits is criminal. Could have tweaked the armor sets that much

Why is Zelda appearing everywhere and being an evil menace??? Zelda tf is going on w you?? Arent you supposed to be in the past

They looked at me, specifically, loving side quests more than my life and going "we have to give them more" and this is a good day

There's a golden horse???

Also I heard Yunobo is a dick in this??? Not my boy :(

I go to the Zora tower and there is a man nearly dead

ALSO OH MY GOD WHY DID ZELDA ATTACK KING DOREPHAN

Man was dying (Lets hope this doesnt age poorly because I dont think I could handle it)

So its been like five years at least since BOTW ended and like. Why does no one remember me and also where did all these new people come from that didnt exist here couple years ago?? Where were yall?? Having tea??

Kilton has a little brother <3

I should get back to the "first" main questline as in the Rito are dying in a blizzard but there's pretty flowers and mayoral elections

Did I already mention they did not nerf bows? They didnt and I love that, archers for life

Also I lost Hestu again and I need more inventory

I am afraid to venture into the Korok Forest

Stables are so fun. You get points from first visit, staying the night, registering horses etc AND THEY GIVE YOU REWARDS

I got the Traveler's Gear for General (my baby boy horse)

I found Big Horse and named him Babylon

Also saved this one guy stuck in a cave

Starting to get to a point where enemies drop 15-30 fuse power parts and life is getting easier

Ive activated like 20 shrines since I last did a bunch. I havent done them because what if I have to build vehicles (bad)

I miss cryonis

Havent done much in the sky tbh

I want my champions tunic. I however dont feel like going to the castle

Where the fuck is Ganondorf

I could always see him in BOTW I dont like this

I am kind of disappointed they didnt change the looks of old armor sets. HOWEVER. Cece's hat is all Im going to say. I wonder if I can wear that to Gerudo town

Im still a one shot to so many things

The Zora are dying (their water is turning into mud)

Gorons have malice pink eyes so dont trust theyre doing too well either

Barbarian armor fits so well with Link's messy long hair

Im still kind of shocked that the sheikah tech is just gone

How do I get into Hateno tech lab

Some of yall are actually building vehicles? Im avoiding that like the plague

Still salty about Sidon

I get taken for a little while and he gets engaged

His fiance did refer to Sidon as "my best friend"

The quote went "Im Prince Sidon's... oh forgive me. I am your best friend's fiancee"

She us cute but still

ALSO THEY MOVED MIPHA'S STATUE TO THE TOP OF PLOYMUS MOUNTAIN

THE ZORA'S DOMAIN STATUE IS NOW OF LINK AND SIDON

Why cant I marry him

Sidon carries Mipha's trident now (sobs)

When you meet him he goes "Its good to see you my friend" so happily

"By the way... I hope you know that I am truly happy to see you again after such a long time apart, my dearest friend"

I sobbed

He loves us so much

Just go visit him

Sidon wont marry me and Sonia and Rauru are married, cant a man find some love in Hyrule

[capitalisticveins]

OKAY I finished the Glenwood playlist and I’m all caught up with the storyline, let me update this whole thing and add a couple of girlies😭

Beth - EASILY one of my top girlies, maybe #2? the top spot isnt stable. SHES SO COOL I LOVE HER SM😭😭😭 The way her and Beautiful talk🥺 and the way they reassure each other🥺and their silliness🥺and her relationship with her pack🥺 and

Abby - CONSTANTLY fighting Beth for that top spot. Her voice is STILL my fav, the way she reacted to magic was so realistic even though she already believed it way real god I love her🥹 HER AND ROSIE ARE AMAZING AND SHES HILARIOUS GAHHHHH

Rachelle - She’s interesting, and that’s the best thing I could say about her. If she has one hater, it’s me. If she has no haters I’ve been wiped from the face of the universe. I’m gonna take Isaiah, Tanya, and Doll, and take care of them myself. I’m gonna handle her and break her arm and not even her FRIENDS AU self will be safe

Rose - I honestly see her more as a motherly figure but you will NEVER catch me complaining about Her, Abby, and Wielder eventually being a polycule JESUSSSS shes so sweet and I knew I’d love her when she was being snarky in Wielder’s mind about Abby when Abby was RIGHT IN FRONT OF THEM god I love Rosie

Claire - I want her to hold me and tell me everything will be okay and I feel like that’d solve all my problems. Her and Knight’s relationship is SO CUTE and they way it literally trancends UNIVERSES AHHHHHH, Also, maybe Ranger isn’t…all bad😒…sorry Ranger ur cool ig🙄

Genevieve - MY CUTIE PATOOTIE SWEETHEART SHES SO ADORABLE HER AND KNIGHT ARE ONE OF MY FAVS THEYRE SO CHEESY AND SWEET AND IN LOVE GENEVIEVE IS SO KINDHEARTED I DONT WANT ANYTHING TO HURT HER EVERRRRR😭😭😭😭

Chloe - I’m gonna be honest I was so invested in the storyline I started skipping Chloe’s audios after her 2nd one💀 I LOVE HER AND SHES CUTE I PROMISE but for the redacted fans reading it’s like watching The Balance but Ollie shows up every 10 minutes teaching Babe to play the board game he likes. She’s cute and I love the D Whitney joke BUT THERE ARE MORE IMPORTANT THINGS TO BE WATCHED

Ms Liza - This lady could do the worst things imaginable to me and I’d ask her “Same time next week?” I don’t have many emotions listening to her due to her lack of audios but I still want her to look at me with a hint of interest I’d do ANYTHING for that

Celine - I was bedrotting and griefstricken when I heard she had a wife. Then I heard Lydia was SCOTTISH and I was BAWLING MY EYES OUT THAT I COULDNT BE WITH BOTH OF THEM. THEIR ACCENTS ARE GORGEOUS GODDAMMIT is Lydia a vamp is she gonna die ohwowzers

Valera - Please kiss me on new years I will be your new years kiss I WILL DO ANYTHING YOU WANT the french accent is making me drool pleas please please please please please please pleas

Harper - …didn’t get past her first audio IM SORRY i don’t like the Fake Dating Trope at all😭😭😭 I’ll try again but I make no promises. She’s like Morgan to me rn

Also Glenwood is apparently on the East Coast and I’m currently studying for drivers class to get my license so when that happens I’m gonna find Glenwood see yall l8r

New CastleAudios fan here’s my initial thoughts abt the character’s I’ve listened to, if the character isnt here I havent listened to her or them yet

ummmm

Beth - Despite her title shes rlly not a tsundere and I love that and I love her and her and Seer are probably my fav duo and WHY R POACHERS OUT TO GET THE PACK

Abby - Probably my favorite voice I love her accent I love her podcast and I love her dynamic with Rose they’re both adorable😭😭 just imagine the listener restocking around the library and whenever she’s ranting abt mythical creatures they just use their psychokinesis to carry the books whenever she’s not looking that’d be hilarious

Rachelle - She seems so sweet🥹 she wants to feel reconnected to her roots thats fcking adorable omg (who tf turned her???)

Rose - I DONT WANT TO DATE HER I WANT HER TO BE MY MOTHER THIS LADY IS SO SWEET IF SHE WAS REAL I’D BE AT HER LIBRARY EVERYDAY AUGHH i love how it’s a mentor student dynamic between her and the listener

Claire - I have a problem, and it’s not with Claire; its with fucking Ranger. why are they so fucking ANNOYING?? (rhetorical) LEAVE HER ALONEEEEE also for Claire she’s petty and thats funny asf💀

Genevieve - I think thats how u spell it? The braces story SPUN ME I love how Sweetheart drove ACROSS THE COUNTRY FOR THEIR GIRL their love is ADORABLE and Genevieve is such a cutie omg😭😭😭

i think thats all the girls so far

Ranger lock in bro💀

[insomnihan]

han’s Entire Thoughts & Feelings on Dreamcatcher’s “Odd Eye”

oh mY F UCKING GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-

there are no read mores here so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

ALRIGHT SO-

OH MY F UCKING GOD THE SONG WHERE DO I EVEN BEGIN WITH THIS??????????? DEAD ASS?????????????? THAT BEGINNING SOUND ALONE TRIGGERED MY FIGHT OR FLIGHT AND THEN IT JUST CALMS DOWN YET MY BRAIN IS ALREADY F UCKING LOSING IT- ITS THE GUITAR ALL THROUGHOUT AND HOW I JUST HEADBANG WITH EVERY HIT OF THAT DRUM OR WHATEVER THE F UCK FOR ME- pls calm down okay i just……………………… leez…… ollounder…………… i oWE YOU MY LIFE- the way the prechorus is so FAST???????? like whaT IN THE ACTUAL F UCK the way it hypes me up with that instrumental the DRUMS GOT ME BOUNCIN AND S HIT AND GET SMACKED IN THE FACE ODD EYE I SWEAR TO GOD I FELT A NEW EMOTION AFTER THA- AFTER THIS WHOLE SONG TO BE HONEST-

THE?????????????? LINE DISTRIBUTION?????????????? IS SO SE*Y?????????????? THE IMMENSE POWER IN SIYEONS AND YOOHYEONS VOICES I CANT- ACTUAL SUA RAPPER CRUMBS idc what yall say minuscule sua rapper crumbs THE AMOUNT OF HANDONG AND DAMI LINES IS F UCKING DELICIOUS 😩😩😩 HANDONG VERSE CHORUS AND BRIDGE?????????????? DAMI BRIDGE??????????????? ‘LIVE IT UP’?????????????? BICTH IM ALIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

forgot to do this for boca so imma do it here kinda

YES YOOHYEON START THE SONG

THE AMOUNT OF HANDONG?????????????????? I CANT BREATHE??????????????????????

and ofc her ooOOOooOOO-

sua rapper crumbs idc idc-

YOOHYEON AND SIYEON BEING QUEENS OF CHORUSES AGAIN ESPECIALLY THE LAST ONE GO👏OFF👏

jiu ‘no more utopia’ AND sua ‘no more utopia’ pls took me three (3) tries to type ‘utopia’

LIVE IT UP YOURE SO RIGHT QUEEN YOU BETTER RAP YOUR HEART OUT

JIU AND HANDONG CHORUS

THE F UCKING BRIDGE CHANGED MY LIFE

okay for the dance i will be using the mcountdown fancam BC I DO WANT THE F UCK I WANT 👁👁 I JUST WANNA SAY i lit rally CANNOT believe how stable they are dancing LIKE THAT™ thE POWER THEY HOLD ANYWAY as always the dance always S L A P and is literally impossible to dance to without feeling like youre absolutely f ucking d*ing and out of breath……………… LOVE THAT

THE BEGINNING EYE FORMATION ARE YOU KIDDING ME-

im delusional but lowkey deja vu clown me idc idc-

THE SUA RUNNING OUT OF THERE THE JIU THE COMPLICATED HAND STUFF

JUST👏THE👏CHOREO👏FOR👏THE👏CHORUS👏BICTH

siyeon doing this

DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

putting a bullet point for just that one (1) second of dami doing That™

handong right after…………………………………

gahyeons part with the other members doing different moves my eyes liked it

THE ENTIRE BRIDGE I DONT NEED TO SAY ANYTHING ELSE

like jiu and dami with handong ive literally watched that for five hours-

i just like the way they lined up and needed it to be linked here

THE SPIN THAT K*LLED US ALL

THE KICK THAT SENT US SIX FEET UNDER

S C R E A M……………………………………………………… Iconic™

DO YOU SEE THE BUDGET IN THE VISUALS JESUS CHRIST- the f ucking set up all of the effects!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! all of the lights!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! all of thE GLOWING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ALL OF IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the black and white set and theyre wearing red…………………… the red and white set and theyre wearing black…………………… that purple and green place…………………… the tree and random nature but everything is so futuristic looking…………………… dunno why yoohyeon is in a graffiti covered restroom but im LIVING for it- SIYEON SURROUNDED BY THOSE TVS DAMI IN THAT TRAIN THAT MULTICOLORED PLACE WHEREVER SUA IS EXCUSE ME- I COULD LITERALLY NAME EVERY SCENE IN THIS DAMN MUSIC VIDEO AND THEY👏ALL👏SLAP👏HARD👏👏👏👏👏👏👏

TIME TO SHOW WHICH SCENES I LIKED

THE WHOLE F UCKING THI-

jk ill name some😊😊😊again id name everything but ill just show one i liked more than others bc this is alreADY TOO DAMN LONG-

this is self restraint btw

I FEEL THREATENED-

helL YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AND IF I CRIED????????????????????????

this is here for no reason other than bc i wanted it here-

OOP-

OOP- x2

………………………………… F-

WHY OFC I HAVE TO PUT THIS HERE

ABSOLUTELY…………………………… ABSOLUTELY

OH F CUK-

it was this or the close up shot either way it k*lled me

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-

😦

OH NO-

OOP- x3

😔😔😔😔😔😔😔

honestly let me just mention i really clowned and set myself up for heartbreak bc the album is only called ‘road to utopia’ but i assumed theyll find utopia bc thats how trilogies work but then this slaps me in the face- what im saying is im 🤡

T H E M

oK A Y SO THIS POST IS LONG ENOUGH ALREADY LIKE GODDAMNIT COULD I JUST SHUT UP FOR TEN (10) MINUTES PLS- SO HERE ILL JUST SAY ONE (1) WORD………………………………………………

W O M E N™

plus this truly is long enough good god-

JIU

OH BICTH SHE GRABBED ME BY MY NECK RIGHT AT THE START WHEN SHE JUST POPPED UP- lemme just talk about this screenshot for a second the STREAKS IN HER HAIR and THE PIERCING???????? THE JACKET???????GOOD GOD????????? L I S T E N her outfits during the dance scenes the R E D especially jeSUS- its that red one for me im pretty sure some of yall saw me go F E R A L™ on the dashboard about it so i WILL NOT go into it again- and theN THAT DRESS A F CUKING QUEEN LOVE TO SEE IT

SUA

ONCE AGAIN I HAVE TO BRING UP THE VERY START WITH THAT SLOW MO- RED👏IS👏HER👏COLOR 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏  the dark hime cut………………… the choker on both the red and the black is it the same one doesnt matter im d*ad……………… yo her wavy hair and that dress when it looked like she was in some hair shampoo commercial bicth i liVED FOR THAT- and theN T H I S YES THIS THAT IN THE SCREENSHOT the leather and the jacket the writing on her face i waNT HER TO BEAT ME WITH THAT LIGHT-

SIYEON

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY IM LITEREALLY CRYINNG

I SWEAR TO GOD I SCREAMED EVERY TIME SHE WAS ON THE SCREEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! pls breathe yes i see that orange coat with the collar and her two different colored eyes and how she is sitting in that chair i see her looking so fine in that red outfit especially near the end of the mv oh mY GOD- those pants yall bringing that style back from boca literally let me bREATHE FOR LIKE TWO (2) SECONDS

HANDONG

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LISTENLISTENLISTENLISTEN my eyes legit started tearing up when i saw her so soon in the mv yall DO NOT understand the emotions im going through to rewatch this mv again and again anD- iiiIIIIiiII CANNOT FULLY EXPRESS MYSELF BUT I JUST WANNA DIRECTLY MENTION THOSE CRYSTALS AND HER HIGH PONYTAIL SHE MADE F UCKING SURE TO SHOW OFF HOW POWERFUL SHE IS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

YOOHYEON

YOOHYEON WITH BUNS??????????????????? THAT LIPSTICK COLOR RIGHT AT THE START???????? THAT OUTFIT WITH THE RED PLAID SKIRT????????? like when you REALLY look at the outfit the polkadot jacket and the tie makes not a lot of sense but she made it woRK!!!!!!!!! okayokayokay her lip ring and dance outfits lets talk about it to be honest its something about that chain that hangs on her torso that makes it really hit………………… but like the entire outfits HIT™ she ripped her pants didnt she

DAMI

I CANT STAND THIS WOMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! tell me why for literally one (1) second of that ‘live it up’ it snapped my neck???????? it was HARDLY A FLASH OF LIGHT YET IT WAS ENOUGH TO HURT ME- i prefer her short hair but listen the longer hair is making so many points rn- i think i said that for boca too… SHES LITERALLY SITTING YALL AND YET HERE I AM- the jacket the necklace the gloves and then that dramatic spin and the leaves OH MY GOD- DID YALL👏SEE THE WAY👏SHE KEPT👏FEELING👏HER NECK👏👏👏👏👏👏👏!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GAHYEON

GAHYEON THE WOMAN YOU ARE- i wanna start with the black hair and thee stickers look bc i wanna buT WE LOVE NOIR BY SUNMI but like i love that look like overall????????????? she literally wears the same outfit for that and this screenshot but the vibe is so different i LOVE this purple color she got going rn and that black hair IS A STATEMENT imma be more open here about it but lowkey i am genuinely missing her dark hair rn- anyway THAT DESIGN AROUND HER EYE WITH THAT RED OUTFIT BRUH DO I D*E-

BONUS TIME: B-SIDE TRACKS (short thoughts and parts i liked)

Intro

IVE NEVER BEEN SO FERAL IN MY LIFE

Wind Blows

this instrumental……………………… holy god????????????? its chill for like a second in the beginning and then it just YEETS you in- imma be real i wasnt sure about that ‘wind blows’ part i dunno why i ……… into it at first but yknow whaT THATS ONE OF THE BEST PARTS DAMIS RAP I SWEAR- but then the prechorus parts are so chill??????????? is it bc its handong its probably bc its handong ‘always be with you like gravity’ siyeon pls- it gives me the same energy as tension and break the wall where i feel like i jusT GAIN ALL THE STRENGTH AND CONQUER THE WORLD yes i saw the dance multiple times it k*lled me every single time

Poison Love

literally what the f uck- when i heard it in the highlight medley i knew i was gonna LOVE this like i cant stand how much i love their sexy bops like dami got me immediately ‘why do you?’ YOURE RIGHT DAMI WHY DO I- you could NEVER go wrong with lower register dreamcatcher NOTHING👏CAN👏GO👏WRONG👏 DAMI AND GAHYEON THEIR RAPS JESUS CHRIST i put my hand on my heart i was so taken aback- maybe i went back to replay it a few times when i was listening to it and then handong……………………………………………………… UH ANYWAY-

4 Memory

JIIIIIIIIIUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WE LOVE THE HAPPY AND BOUNCY AND FUN BOP OF THE ALBUM- like ive said this to a few moots that this song just makes me happy and lifts up my mood its the little instrumental parts in the chorus for me i dunno what it is its just pleasant to my ears and then damis rap is so fun like :cccccc cute- like this is a song about the seasons and wanting to be with someone (well jiu help write this is this about like insomnias or am i a stupid clown-) like i REALLY WISH i could express how much i enjoy this song but i would just be repeating myself that its a feel good happy song!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

New days

DAAAAAAAAMIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LIKE i dunno how to describe the energy this song holds except ‘friendship energy’- its literally the guitar all throughout the song for me LIKE i feel like im just wrapped in a nice hug BUT NOT JUST ANY KIND OF HUG its the kind that the other person opened their jacket and theyre holding me and their jacket is around me listening to this song yall i kinda wanna cry i dunno- everyone sounds so lovely especially jiu pls her voice is so soft and DAMI OFC HER RAP GETS A HELL YEAH™ FROM ME like the ‘find you’ AND THEN AT THE END ‘FOUND YOU’ IM 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 (if yall cant see its the pleading puppy eyed emoji)

LIKE WHAT A WAY TO START THE F UCKING YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im so in awe of everything about this as SOON AS SOON I SAY i saw the very first photo teaser and i COULDNT STOP LISTENING TO THE HIGHLIGHT MEDLEY AND THE TEASER WITH THE SUITS AND THE DRINKS IS STILL LIVING IN MY HEAD- alright alright ill calm down for this part but its one of my FAVORITE ALBUMS FOR👏SURE👏 like i really cant think of any criticisms regarding anything about it!!!!!!!!!!!! since im posting this after promotions are over (odd eye promotions anyway) i will just say im EXTREMELY proud of what we have accomplished as fans and what the girls have achieved during this era!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it was hella wild all around and i am once again saying that im very happy to be an insomnia <3<3<3<3<3<3<3

and ONCE AGAIN JUST ONE (1) MORE TIME RIGHT BEFORE MY BIRTHDAY HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉 

IN CONCLUSION: THIS ALBUM TAKES ME TO AN ENTIRELY NEW WORLD AND IM GONNA LIVE IT UP

AND AS ALWAYS:

[disaster-bay-leaf]

Ok so these were the cutest~ (ㆁωㆁ)

4, 6, 7, 9, 12, 19, 22, 23, 28, 33, 34, 46, 47, 52, 59, 60, 63, 66, 83, 87, 88, 93, 99

I kno I listed like....all of them lmao but feel free to answer whichever you want and ofc you can ask me in return Baybe ( ◜‿◝ )♡

uHUHUHUHU much content for me to answer, im happy bebe 💜💜💜���

4 - how do you take your coffee/tea?

hm coffee either Very Black No Sugar (for the sleep deprived me) or iced latte three sugars and theres no in between

and as for tea its All Black Teas That Exist, cinnamon-flavoured especially (but basically all teas that come to mind when u think “autumn”), and rooibos!!! okay basically the only oke i dont like is any type of green tea (which is sad because they look cool but my tastebuds said ✨no✨)

6 - do you keep plants?

honestly id l o v e too because i love plants but,,, im kinda horrible at taking care of them though still way better than the majority of my family (research helps) so the only plant i own is kinda a small-palm-tree-looking thing in a bigass glass jar that i saved from my mother’s plant-destructing hands and its mostly doing well (the ends of its leaves are starting to be yellow tho and im worried:((( )

7 - do you name your plants?

yes!!! though the current one was named by my sister and its called “pickett” after fantastic beasts shsjjsj

9 - do you like singing/humming to yourself?

oh god oh dude you have n o idea

i have absolutely n o singing voice but its something i do constantly to give my brain the right amount of stimuli so basically i listen to music 24/7 and hum to myself 99% of that time

12 - whats your favourite planet?

oh i actually didnt think about this for so long but either pluto (hes a planet screw nasa) or saturn (RINGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) or venus (girls,,,and libra,,,)

19 - do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw in it?

okay im gonna be completely honest with yall and say that my every single try at keeping a journal failed spectacularly and i lost motivation after like a few months so my only journals rn are my fancy fake-leather-bound calendar to note tests and assessments into, a kinda roughed up notebook that i uses for noting down poems or scribbling or passing notes in class, and a kinda fancy bullet journal notebook that i used as a book of shadows for a while but since my fountain pen died i didnt touch it

22 - are you a morning person?

n o

i am so not a morning person but i wish i could be because honestly dawns are beautiful

but as it is rn im either sleep deprived all the time and loathe every second of being in an awake state or (if i have a few days of schoolbreak) my biological clock moves forward a few hours and i sleep 2am-10am

23 - whats your favourite thing to do on lazy days with zero obligations?

except for the fact that i dont remember the last time it happened, i would probably spend it drawing outside, watching anime with my sister and riding a bike around the forest

28 - sunrise or sunset?

i love sunrises because its so peaceful and everyone is asleep but also i subconsciously immediately correlate them with waiting for a train to take me to school (because thats basically the only time i see them) so its a bittersweet love especially with my fucked up biological clock

but sunsets are really really pretty too and i see them more often so i cant choose

33 - whats your fave pastry?

and isnt that a millior-dollar question dhsjjsjsj

either cinnamon rolls (i absolutely adore them) or that one specific type of cupcake-shaped-thing made out of shortcrust/bread/whatever its called and filled with vanilla pudding

34 - tell us about a stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it?

awwww this is cute

okay so basically my two favourite stuffed animals (i still have them, they sit in my wardrobe) were two teddy bears (like maybe 20cm high each of them) and one was pure brown and the other was silver-brown and they had stereotypical polish male names “Waldek” (read. Valdek) and Stefan (i think tho im not sure if i remember correctly, my memory is a feeble thing sometimes

46 - tell us the worst pun you can think of

what dog would never bite you? a hot dog *badumtss*

47 - what food do you think should be banned from the universe?

huh a year ago id say pineapple pizza but i guess i dont hate pineapples that much anymore (tho putting them on pizza is still an abomination) but i think that if id ever want to get rid of anything it would be parsley, i hate that freakin herb (does it count as food tho)

52 - what are your favourite memes of the year so far?

the ever given for sure shsjshjsjsjsjjsj

but bullying tramp stamps is gold and pure tumblr energy too

as for fandom memes: im in love with all keeping-up-with-the-todorokis variations and the fact that the entire bsd fandom looked at fukuchi and said “biTCH” and thats one of the only things we’re unanimous about

59 - whats your favourite myth?

i always liked the kora/persephone myth (though demeter is an overbearing parent to the nth power), loki and thor crossdressing at a party to get mjolnir back, atalanta because shes a queen and id politely ask her to kick my ass, and cassandra because she deserved better, and theres a l o t more because alas i was a mythology nerd but this post is long enough for me not to make this section 20 times longer sjjsjsjsjsjks

but there are a lot of slavic myths that are very cool too, though we dont know that much about them as about the greeks for example

60 - do you like poetry? what are some of your faves?

o o o o h yeah i do like poetry because to create such a beautifully sounding thing with only words someone has to be a genius

some of my favs are: some works of nakahara chuuya (thank u bsd for introducing me to this man’s beautiful imagery in his works i swear to god the descriptions do it for me) (also his poem about having hangovers is a mood like i feel you buddy), the raven by ea poe (i know everyone likes it but hOLY DAMN THE INTER/INTRAVERSE RHYMES ARE LIKE,,, BREATHTAKING) (and aso im a slut for gothic horror), and many more but also That One Poem From Welcome To Nightvale about reaching the island in the west,,, only perfect vibes from it

63 - are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organised or kinda leave them be?

okay heres the thing. for anyone else both my playlist library and my bookshelf would be considered pure chaos of a mad man b u t they actually have a highly focused system which means that i sort them based on their vibes, lovability and (in case of books) their age and whether or not theyre a part of a series so i would say my bookshelf is rather organised (when a quarter of it isnt occupying my desk that is) and my music is more organised than not but sometimes it gets out of control and i have to sort it entirely again

66 - what would your ideal flower crown look like?

either entirely constructed of simple white daisies, entirely constructed of only white roses, or something that probably would win a “how many different coloured flowers can one fit in a flower crown” competition

or something purple (maybe not belladonna)

83 - whats some of your favourite album art?

god i dont know if it counts but hozier’s wasteland baby is probably one of my absolute favourites and no one shall beat that

“thrifted youth” (dalynn) and “standard deviation” (danny schmidt) have very aesthetic covers too

also the iconic p!atd too weird to live, too rare to die! album cover,,, its just iconic what can i say

and last but not least matt meason’s pink-and-black album covers (though bank on the funeral is really pretty too but like,,, “who killed matt meason” d o e s it for me and so does the 2017 tribulation single)

87 - what are some movies that you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives?

this is such a hard question because im not a really cinematography-oriented gal but i suppose that (at the risk of not going deep enough into the cinema world):

- the princess bride

- inception

- night at the museum

- SPIRITED AWAY

- forrest gump

- truman show

- E.T. (i cried okay)

- the lord of the rings (because damn me if this isnt one impressive adaptation)

- parasite

and one more personal recommendation: “ready or not” with samara weaving because goddamn i dont usually watch this genre but holy s h i t is it good

93 - whats the hairstyle you wear the most?

honestly just plain hair down (because having curly hair is a menace), split in the middle when i have longer hair and split on one side when its short

also low ponytails or half-up-half-down when im exercising, or double french braids when my hair doesnt cooperate enough to look presentable in any other form

99 - list some songs that resonate with your soul whenever you hear them

this is difficult because my music taste is a goddamn rollercoaster on a good day, but heres some:

- me and the sky from “come from away” musical (this is sort of a test song for my mental stability, if i cry i aint stable)

- dancing after death by matt meason (okay most songs by matt meason except for like,,, hallucinogenics maybe)

- tears and rain by james blunt

- i will follow you into the dark by death cab for cutie

- almost home by mxmtoon

- anything by hozier really but shrike especially

- payphone, the cover by alex g (i cried to this song so many times)

- burning pile by mother mother (can i roast all my problems please)

- long way from home and cleopatra by the lumineers

- autoclave by the mountain goats

oooh that was c o o o o o o o l as fuck thank you sm so much bebe (and sorry for the long post @everyone else)

[r41nbowrumpusp4rty]

this is not what yall signed up 4 when u made the mistake of following my blog, but i wanna talk bout some ideas i had about a new toy line so imma ramble into the internet void.

I like to keep up with toy lines that come out and in that vein i also like to trash talk blindboxes when theyre done wrong and praise them when done right. In an ideal world you could buy just one blind box and have fun with what you get, and minimal waste. theres also the want to be happy with what u get even if it wasent the ONE you wanted, I usually see this done best with quality in the product and every character being well designed. i once saw a doll line that had poofy scented hair and you could see what color hair u get through the packaging, which makes a ton of sense to me cus to a child the hair color on a hair centric doll is the most important thing.

all of this was context to talk about a new toy line ive been following where u unwind a ball of different yarns to find a cute plush animal and all the stuff u need to make a buncha crafts. now i can talk about what i think would be cool in the next series of this toy line,

1 i think it would be rad if the box it came in looked like a lil house and the window u see the yarn ball through looked like the window of the house.

2 I think the outer most yarn on the ball should indicate something about the pet, a lot of blindboxes will split their characters into themes like "fairy tale" or "desserts" and i think having a yarn color scheme for each theme would help in making sure that u get something u like. another idea in this vein would be having the box house from idea one have something on it to indicate what kinda animal u r getting like a horse box would look like a stable or a dog house has a dog bone outside.

3 they should switch up some of the crafts, rn we got pom poms, frienship bracelets, a pet collar and a bed. their social media also shows different methods to do each craft which is cool. I think some crafts they could have in the future are things like fingerknitting (maybe starting with a pet scarf and working up to sewing the scarves together into a blanket for your pet), sewing together a lil bag so u can take ur pet on adventures, if they dont make the box a cute reusable house they could make a cut out loom or a box weaving project where you cut slits n the box an weave the yarn to make it look like a basket. i also like the idea of making pet clothes and stuff too. maybe they could include a lil knitting spool in the center instead of the pom pom maker. another tool that could go in the middle is a friendship bracelet circle loom thingy and in the mold of these things they could make it look like a dinner table or somethin. it seems like theyre aiming the base craft at a younger audience and using the online videos to show more complex ways of doing it, which is good but kids are smarter than a lot of people give em credit for, they can do a lot more kinds of crafts. last note on this, the fluffy most "yarn" on the outside works great for pet bed stuffing but if theres no pet bed project you could change that outermost yarn to a bulky fuffy kind for finger knitting.

4 they outghta think through the yarn colors more, more different colors in each ball so each of ur diys look different, but also having the colors make sense for the pet (which is why splitting the pets into themed groups would be a good idea(another thought is to have one of each animal per theme)) and any charms they include could be better matched to the pet

5 how are there not any traditional yarn pets (sheep alpaca rabbit ect) ?! i know all the yarn is acrylic but it would be so cute. on the instructions there should be a "fluff your pet out" step on the instructions (just write it cuter like "give your new pal a few pats to smooth them out" or something) its not vital but i think it would add something nice.

6 the lil charms for friendship bracelet (if they redid that craft) would be cooler if they were a bit more pet accessory esq, like it could be a charm but it also is a comb (blunt and wide tooth to keep the yarn hair nice) or a pet toy charm like a little mouse or a

7 the youtube should expand to more accessible crafts 4 kids, i remember being a youngin and wanting to do crafts from a book but lacking all the supplies, with this u r only missing sisscors and you can take the knowledge from these crafts and use whatever yarn u want for them and re do most of them missing clips or charms. They could show how to knit with pencils or maybe even show some papercrafts like a simple origami drawer to hold your pets belongings.

final thoughts (if you made it this low i commend your fortitude though my poor grammar) I like this toy line and can see how it could be a toy that a child gets and treasures for many years, i also like the different ways to do each craft. I hope that this toy line dosent end up one of the more "collect them all!" types cuz while that might work well for the instagram moms with youtube channels where they get paid to review toys it dosent work as well for the kid whose been saving up their pocket money and wants to get something that they will have a ton of fun with.

just in case anyone up in the raveltales office sees this, i promise i can be more coherent, and i do have more nifty ideas ;)

[princess-pill-enjoyer]

Passed out off a morning dose and woke up to the sweet sight of an email from my old uni 🙃

I thought I settled that for a while as I said I didn't have the money for that and the lady said it was fine. Buuuut apparently that had a time limit as well so they now want me to pull $400 out my ass or they're more than likely gonna send that shit off to collections

Part of me doeent even care. It ain't like I'm going to jail over 2k and I have literally nothing of value. No car. No house. Annnd no money. Sooo yeh have fun tryna get yall shit lmao. But I know that's a pretty stupid way've looking at it. Ruining my credit this early on probably ain't s great idea.

Ah. This sucks. My dad really doesn't want to drive me around cause of how much gas is now, the work from home shit he and my stepmom are doing is having me wait a month for some dumb junk with my mic, had to turn down two different jobs due to my dad deciding they're not for me.. bruh. Atp. I'd just walk to work. It'd probably at least be an hour long but. Fuck it at this point. Only thing is I live in one of the most infamous places for human trafficking so I'd definitely have to stay alert and try to go on different routes here and there to not make my routine as obvious

I probably woulda been able to float by for another month or so if my dad and stepmom would've paid me back. They owe me like $500 and half that comes from some shit they borrowed a year ago now. Plus, i accidentally eavesdropped on them grabbing my dad's phone instead of mine. They apparently been borrowing a lot from soneone else as well soo yeah even if they did have the money i dont think they have that to spare rn

The other option woulda been to take out extra on my student loan but my mom already took the excess out so I'd have to apply for a whole new loan. If I were still in school that'd be no problem but my incident in April makes me hesitant to make big commitments like that. I was so close to ending my shit just off owing 7k but a whole new semesters worth of debt just for me to possibly fail again sounds like a tragedy waiting to happen lol

Sigh. Days like this are so hard. I used to stick around because of an age goal I set for myself which sometimes felt like my only motivation. But it's just like nowadays I'm long past every age goal I've set and the plan was stay around until it started being inconvenient/not fun to be. Annd as of now it is looking mighty inconvenient. It makes me question why I'm even trying anymore. I never wanted to be here for this exact reason you know?

I feel like I'm just here atp. What am I working towards anymore? What do I even like to do? Do I honestly even like my hobbies or do I just like the distraction from my head? Even if everything fixed itself in the future and I started living a normal stable life, would it justify ignoring my damn near lifelong wish to not be here?

I'm gonna try to get R's attention and make sure she's not too fucked up then take a gram and head to bed. I am not mentally alright enough to have those questions circulating rn

HA apparently if I don't poof $400 up by Monday they're charging me damn near $600 extra

I am. Done. I just wanna sleep and not wakeup atp. I'm so done. I never wanted to be here in the first place and now I gotta drag myself out of an addiction, get over an unrequited love, find a job that fits my dad's parameters, pay off a mysterious 2k AND my 15k of loans. What the fuck. I never signed up for this and I would've ended my shit before my stupid fucking age goal had I known things would go to shit this quickly. I'm tired of feeling horrible for not wanting to do anything. I'm so tired of fighting myself to do the barest minimums and having it not be enough time and time again. I'm so fucking tired of all this up and down. God like. One day I'm in one of the best schools for engineering with hella open house money and the next I'm a fucking basement dwelling dropout with no money and no real desire to go out and do the shit that'll MAKE ME MONEY. And to top it off I'm fucking addicted to otc allergy medicine that is literally bottom of the barrel to the point that even WITH it being so accessible everyone knows how shit it is and leaves it alone. But not me ofc. My dumbass just had to screw up shit further. What is my problem at this point. This is my fault. I can't keep staying in this stupid limbo of barely doing anything but not having the guts to make that a reality. Atp I'm either gonna have to pick on or yhe other. My money's on the second but we'll see :)

[yoongspd]

yo i’ve been tagged by @orb1tch to do this, tysm dear <3 

it said i should be tagging 20 people sooo im choosing some new and old mutuals for this. if you wanna do this go ahead, and if you don’t want to or already have dont mind this it’s okk !!! hi @syubah, @kimnamtaejin, @mangplushie, @lovehobs, @gukster, @mozartae, @bangpdofficial, @kyut-tea, @jinhits, @yeontaen, @jintroduction, @min-jesus, @justinsgf, @napmon, @bbyjoonbug, @hoshikio, @cypheryg, @dykescult im tagging yall.

last

- drink: water

- call: my mom

- text: my mom lmao

- song u listened to: rn im listening to home by brockhampton

- time u cried: yesterday morning but it wasn’t sad crying

have u ever

- dated someone twice: nope never punch me in the face if i do

- kissed someone & regretted it: no

- been cheated on: yes.

- lost someone special: yes

- been depressed: i haven’t been checked by a doctor but yeap and it comes in waves

- gotten drunk & thrown up: yeap lmao it wasnt a good experience

favorite colors

1. beige

2. white

3. blue

in the last year have u

- made any new friends: yes

- fallen out of love: no

- laughed so hard that u cried: yes !!

- found out someone was talking abt u: i guess yeah but i dont remember but it probably happened

- found out who ur friends were: yep

- kissed someone on ur fb friends list: no

general

- how many ppl from ur fb friends do u know irl: 300+ ?? idk maybe more cb these are usually school people and relatives so it’s a lot

- do u have any pets: no T_______T

- do u want to change ur name: nah

- what did u do for ur birthday last year: we probably ate outside i think and my friends and i went out too

- what were u doing last night at midnight: i was asleep !

- what time did u wake up today: 5:30 am

- what is something u can’t wait for: im pretty patient nowadays, ya know enjoying the present but hmm the first thing on my mind when i force this question wld be living a stable life and giving back to my family

- have u ever talked to a person named tom: yeap and i had a huge crush on him

- something that gets on ur nerves: the philippine government !!! cronies are taking over and pulling my country back in the dumps !!!!

- most visited website: tumblr ??

- hair color: it’s colored medium brown rn but it’s naturally dark brown

- short hair or long hair: short

- do u have a crush on someone: yeap, realizing it yesterday was what made me cry

- what do u like abt urself: my mind probably and how looking back i see ive gotten through so many things already :)

- want any piercings: yeap !!1 but i have sensitive ears so i havent had any since i was 12 :///

- blood type: B

- nicknames: chesca/ches but people close to me irl call me chikay, and my family has these nicknames for me: kay/king/chi

- relationship status: single

- zodiac sign: scorpio

- pronouns: she/her

- fave tv shows: i dont rlly watch tv :(((( but the last ones ive seen were friends and stranger things. i like them but i dont think about them much

- tattoos: nope

- right handed or left handed: right

- ever had surgery: yep. i don’t have an appendix now hnfgjsfgks

- sport: im one of the least athletic people you’ll ever meet but i know some softball because i’ve written a sports article on the championship game for our intramurals lmaoooooooo

- vacation: dream vacation ?? any place w rich culture and history. but if this is asking what i did on vacation aside from staying home, we went to Mactan, Cebu last summer. It was beautiful :)

- trainers: ?? hmm i love wearing them bc theyre comfy and i need them bc my feet easily tire

more general:

- eating: i last ate a breakfast meal at mcdonalds w my roomies

- drinking: water

- i’m about to watch: blue is the warmest color tomorrow (i wasnt planning to watch a film actually but this made me think and aaah ok i need to watch this tomorrow while i have nothing to do)

- waiting for: classes to start

- want: a 4.0 GPA at least once and nothing below 3.5 this college

- get married: when im financially stable

- career: i wanna be a corporate lawyer

which is better:

- hugs or kisses: tight hugs !!!

- lips or eyes: eyes :>

- shorter or taller: a taller boii but if we’re talking about girls hmm a petite smol one wld be so cute (im definitely talking about someone here) :(((((((((((

- older or younger: older

- nice arms or stomach: arms

- hookup or relationship: rn i rlly dont need a relationship so id settle for a hookup if i get needy hhhh

- troublemaker or hesitant: troublemaker (bc i am one, not intentionally just bc im A Fool)

have you ever:

- kissed a stranger: no

- drank hard liquor: yeap

- lost glasses: yeap all my glasses except the one im wearing rn and the last one i used bc i broke it

- turned someone down: i didn’t have a chance to

- sex on first date: no

- broken someone’s heart: people said so

- had your heart broken: yes

- been arrested: no

-  cried when someone died: yes

- fallen for a friend: yes :/

do you believe in:

- yourself: now i do !!

- miracles: maybe

- love at first sight: no

- santa claus: no

- kiss on first date: it depends

- angels: yeap

other:

- best friend’s name: june (so like i hardly use the nickname joon when i go hard bc that’s just Weird, man)

- eye colour: brown

- fave movie: kimi no nawa :///// or dead poets society

- fave actor: ... i dont watch films much :( ask me about books instead

[ryodan]

Do you watch Boruto? What do you think of the newest episode that covers Gaiden? Satisfactory or no?

ask me something you’ve always wondered

no I dont ahh its too childish and fillery for my taste. I am on 4G and i’m using my data to read and watch Haikyuu!! plus update my tumblr and study (ill watch gaiden when the whole thing is out when im back home with stable wifi). From what i’ve seen i’d give the animated rendition a 5/10. I am not impressed tbh, the animation style after the last kept going down hill and it’s at lowest point rn. The characters look nothing like their manga counterparts and they aren’t even trying to make them look better, the designs are messed up, the animation is so stiff it’s like you can TELL they used the same drawing and frames to avoid spending money. I am beyond done with SP. That scene with Sarada in the library is just unnecessarily stupid and makes no sense and the lead up to gaiden just shat on ss with the 2 minute date bullshit. People bitch that people who complain are setting the bar too high but? do these people even WATCH anime? Naruto has been shat on by the rest of the anime community for its shitty animation quality, inconsistent fillers and annoying fan base.  

‘they just want to meet a weekly deadline!’ then fucking WAIT like other animation studios do…don’t fuck up kishimotos immaculate art, dont destory Tokyo Ghouls story in s2 and don’t help fuel Bleach’s shipping wars you unprofessional shit house. Why are anime like SNK, BNHA and Haikyuu!! held at such high standards? They give themselves time to ensure the best project execution. I am not asking SP to wait 90 years like SNK but holy fuck the amount of fillers and shitty animation quality is a viral joke at this point..RIGHT after the wedding episodes (which were made to be ugly comic relief style to avoid budget overload) boruto was released which already meant screwed up stiff frame animation that makes me so annoyed because SP CAN do better..they did some crisp frames for bleach, some beautiful fluid fights in naruto, some seamless frames in TG and all in all have had some great graphics. If they can pull some amazing animations like that then how good will they be if they fucking WAIT and do the simplest job- give people what’s in the manga since you are shitty writers and animate to the best of their capacity. Stop with the excessive fillers that shit on characters and add plot holes to the original work that the author worked so hard on and simply do your god damn job.

A simple example since -ic yall havent noticed ive been wanking the haikyuu!! series a lot lately- you started this rant, lets look at these two animation frames of 2 hinatas, one more superior than the other

see how the animation literally focuses on one drawing, moving the frame and adding that effect to give the LEAST amount of effort into the animation? Anime is meant to be pretty and fluid, this is literally just MOVING LINES.

look at this fluid ass eye shot where EVERYTHING is thought out, down to the wind motions moving the hair as he jumps. There is more than one drawing of the eye to give the scene fluidity and even the ‘still’ frames such as his hair are drawn more than once to make them move seamlessly and give them kinetic momentum. The hair moves with the wind and the eye focuses on the enemy as he moves. Thats an animation.

In fact, further wanking haikyuu!! (and literally any other series with a studio that gives a shit) here is a fun fact: in an animation of orange boys eyes, they are made to move with MULTIPLE different drawings, as much as SIXTY different drawings for an animation that lasts less than 5 seconds…and then when the studio goes into one drawing animations they make sure to add movements, shadings and vibrant backgrounds to still make everything look appeasing to the eye and fluid. Compare that to SP who do one drawing FULL BODY frames and do their best to avoid spending time and money to yield results that are as beautiful as THIS

In that jump scene the camera angle and fade out is literally just made to symbolize one of the characters view of the match as he is so absorbed into giving the jumping kid the ball and is so singularly focused on the ball…this goes FULL circle (yes they even kept that much attention to detail in mind) when the match is then shown in an objective manner for the audience with the camera angle showing us the height of his jump and it shaking to show us the impact of it all and then fades out again because orange kid is focusing as he spikes the ball…it’s literally a beautiful piece of animation. They went as far as animating an exaggerated idealized CORRECT and accurate to real life volleyball pose..the attention to detail pays off immensely. 

Even when on a budget, anime is the art of animation..the entire genre of media is based on aesthetic animation. Every shading, shadow, camera angle given by the director, frame and drawing makes a huge difference to the visual story telling aspect of the story. SP not only fucks up the basic definition of an anime but they ALSO add their shitty writing to top it off. 

sorry for the rant omg I went off on a tangent.

What about you? What do yall think?

[revenge-goth]

addiction: a life update

so im gonna post an update on my life. not that yall want it or will even read it but i really need this rn soo. also theres a lot im not gonna iclude bc i wanna talk about addiction. theres a lot to be said about gow i used sex as a coping mechanism, my relapses with self harm, and my journey w medications and mental illness. ill save that for another time. also huge trigger warning for addiction, rape, and suicide.

----------

i started drinking back around 2013 when i was 15. from there, i became a high functioning alcoholic for the next three years. i would always start my day drinking, always took tumblers w alcohol to school. no one really noticed until around my senior year when it really started to become more of a problem due to having been in a really sexually abusive relationship. i did it to cope with everything. i was scared about the future since i never thought i was going to make it past 17 and my 18th birthday was slowly approaching. i was scared about college and growing up and what i wanted to do with my life. i remember being really drunk when receiving my awards and scholarships at a school district function. i remember i found it funny that a fuck up like me was representing my high school and seen as a really successful student while i was masking my drunken state.

by the time i went to college i was blowing through cash for alcohol, i stole from bars, i stole from frat guys. i lied a lot. i did a lot of stupid shit.

during this though, my following on twitter was growing steadily. my drunken thoughts and actions became peoples entertainment and was sensationalized by those around me. people would recognize me as sandia goth in public, people wanted to party w me, people wanted to hang w me, people loved that version of me.

in 2017 i started abusing pills after being raped at a party. i was really drunk when it happened and i dont really remember it. that night is one of those regrets i have to carry with me for the rest of my life. at first i would abuse sleeping meds. later on i started to abuse the fuck outta my antipsychotics. eventually i was prescribed ativan, a benzodiazepine, and that was the beginning of my downward spiral. i was constantly downing pills with a bottle of vodka every night. i was always really careless. i had it in my head that maybe taking all those pills and drinking would eventually end up killing me and that one night i just wouldnt make it home. i dont remember a lot from that period in my life. i remember vague things like stading out on my dorms balcony while all the color around me was extremely saturated and everything was shiny. i remember waking up after a really bad bender in my own vomit. i remember how disappointed my sister was. i remember staring at the bathroom floor.

i hit rock bottom that december, i had tried to commit suicide multiple times in my life but this time i felt like it was a lot more real and a lot more final. it didnt happen though. i dont remember christmas and in my drunken state i lost the christmas present my sister was so excited about giving me. looking back at pictures you could tell that i wasnt there at all and that my family was taking notice.

in january 2018 i checked myself into an inpatient hospital to get sober. i was terrified. i showed up to the hospital intoxicated. they ask you a lot of questions when you come in and i remember talking about everything and just laughing about it. the assessor was really creeped out. they made me sleep it off in a waiting room before they let me into the unit.

it helped a lot and i met a lot of people i wont ever forget. it was kind of weird being the youngest there and group was rough. i remember staying in my room and not being able to go eat because my heartrate was at 52 and i felt actually dead. the withdrawal process was really difficult and staying off was even harder. the first thing i did when i was discharged was drink a whole lot, get high, and had my friends drive me across half of the valley going 90 on the freeway while blasting lcd soundsystem with the windows down at 3 am.

after that i decided that it was time to really stop. my parents had cleared out the liquor cabinet and moved me to a room downstairs with no lock where they could keep an eye on me. they found my stash and threw it out. i also started smoking a lot of fuckin cigarettes. i was sober for about 5 months.

i started drinking again but just socially. a healthy amount. i was good except for a few hiccups here and there until march 2019 when i was raped, again, at another party. i was sober this time which really fucked me up. i remember everything and still have nightmares about it. i started abusing medications again and smoking a lot of weed. i was high for about three weeks before i became suicidal and called the cops on myself so i could be hospitalized. i would end up being hospitalized for two weeks. when i got out i started snorting ambien (which is fuckin wack and i dont recommend). that landed me back in the hospital two weeks later. i would be hospitalized two more times before being stable enough to not have someone taking care of me 24/7.

and we come to now. last week i relapsed. i got really sick though bc the wine i drank was spolied. it really scared me though because i thought my braincells were dying because of all the pills i had snorted (i literally thought this) but it was just the wine. it kind of scared me back to my senses though that that path is not the fuckin way to go.

ive recently gotten back to the things i love: music and art. i reopened my tumblr acct, found my sketchbooks from high school and dug up my old music. doing all of this, including doing a lot of research on my old icon gerard way, watching life on the murder scene and crying because ive been there, and seeing frank iero live, has (as ridiculous as it may sound to most that someone you look up to can be a saving force) made me consider getting clean for 2020. for real this time.

sometimes i miss her. the sadia goth everyine loved and looked up to. i lost a lot of friends when i got sober and even more followers. thats not important in the grand scheme of things, it was an empty sense of validation for me. whats truly important is that im not her anymore. im me. addiction prone, mentally ill, over medicated, lonely, sad, artistic, gives no shits, emo trash, goth icon, uses way too many gerard way references, astrology loving, empathetic to a fault, me.

i know that this is something im going to struggle with for the rest of my life, but i really want to go forward knowing that im trying my hardest and giving it my best shot. this is possibly my hardest feat, my biggest challenge in life, but im trynna make it and ill sure as fuck never let it take me alive.

xoxo,

-sandia goth

(alondra)

[noecat]

88 qn tag meme

thank u 2 the lovely @jiminieboi for tag!!

holy shit this was long,,listen i tag no one but my wife @wingjk bc im literally too lazy to breathe rn

the last:

1. DRINK: passionfruit red tea. it was too sweet i wish i’d gone w green but that’s too sour,,,,honestly a representation of my personality as a whole

2. PHONE CALL: school friend who was wondering where i was

3. TEXT MESSAGE: if messenger counts, @wingjk bc i was going to sleep

4. SONG YOU LISTENED TO: come back home by bts

5. THE TIME YOU CRIED: i don’t recall!! perhaps a couple weeks ago?

have you:

6. DATED SOMEONE TWICE: don’t call me out like this

7. KISSED SOMEONE AND REGRETTED IT: not really? i dont regret many things

8. BEEN CHEATED ON: ha

9. LOST SOMEONE SPECIAL: yes

10. BEEN DEPRESSED: listen

11. GOTTEN DRUNK AND THROWN UP: i don’t get drunk

top 3 favorite colors

12. black

13. pink

14. in your area

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

15. MADE NEW FRIENDS: yes and i love them

16. FALLEN OUT OF LOVE:  L I S T E N

17. LAUGHED UNTIL YOU CRIED: rarely, but yes!!

18. FOUND OUT SOMEONE WAS TALKING ABOUT YOU: yall. assholes. love to gossip. and i love finding out about it so it’s a mutually beneficial thing

19. MET SOMEONE WHO CHANGED YOU: doesn’t everyone change me to some degree?? yes, though i do think a lot of the char dev ive undergone was internally motivated and not bc of a specific person,,,i just want to treat people better.

20. FOUND OUT WHO YOUR FRIENDS ARE: yes and i Love Them

21. KISSED SOMEONE ON YOUR FACEBOOK LIST: ppft no who the fuck even facebooks in the year 2k17,,,tho,, @wingjk​ hmu ;(

GENERAL

22. HOW MANY OF YOUR FACEBOOK FRIENDS DO YOU KNOW IN REAL LIFE: none

23. DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS: a kitten !! listen he’s an asshole but i love him

24. DO YOU WANT TO CHANGE YOUR NAME: as in legally?? i wish!! hopefully soon

25. WHAT DID YOU DO FOR YOU LAST BIRTHDAY: ha ha dont talk to me

26. WHAT TIME DID YOU WAKE UP: i overslept today bc my sleeping schedule is,,,,,very good,,,,,,,,,,,

27. WHAT WERE YOU DOING AT MIDNIGHT LAST NIGHT: readin fanfic rip

28. NAME SOMETHING YOU CAN’T WAIT FOR: hobi. wheres. ur. mixtape. where. also MY BDAY IS IN LESS THAN A MONTH !!! LOVE ME !!!!!!

29. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU SAW YOUR MOM: uhm yesterday

30. WHAT IS ONE THING YOU WISH YOU COULD CHANGE IN YOUR LIFE: listen,

31. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW: the sweet sound of everyone being loud as fuc

32. HAVE YOU EVER TALKED TO A PERSON NAMED TOM: i dont think so ??

33. SOMETHING THAT IS GETTING ON YOUR NERVES: people breathing around me

lost questions

34. MOLE(S): ya

35. MARK(S): scars ?? i fell into a ditch once and i still have the scars from that,,also depression isnt ideal

36. CHILDHOOD DREAM: to be a lawyer

37. HAIR COLOR: brown but im gna bleach it someday

38. LONG OR SHORT HAIR:  short-ish

39. DO YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON SOMEONE: not romantically but i am currently interested in someone, yeees

40. WHAT DO YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF: sometimes the planets alighn just right and i say something quotable that im proud of

41. PIERCINGS: that havent healed completely already ? 2, in my ears

42. BLOODTYPE: red

43. NICKNAME(S): q, ‘that asshole’, kyu

44. RELATIONSHIP STATUS: not looking

45. ZODIAC: leo

46. PRONOUNS: im agender. i strongly prefer it/its for Reasons but some of yall fucks take offense bc ‘but u are not an object!!’ and like. listen. if u think that using ‘they/them’, which i do not want to be called, is somehow more respectful to my identity ???  ? ?  ? i dont rly have much to say. in spaces where people are less tolerant and presentation overrides id, i go by she/hers.

47. FAVOURITE TV SHOW: i dont watch them anymore but ill always have a special spot in my heart for hannibal and my earliest experiences w bbc sherlock (ahahah can u believe i used to be a sh blog tho)

48. TATTOOS: not yet!! i want to get mine right the first time

49. RIGHT OR LEFT HAND: technically ambidextrous but ive been using my right hand for so long (bc u dont rly realize how inconvenient literally everything is w left hand until u try it skdfjgfg) that it’s now my dominant one

50. SURGERY: yes, but minor

51. HAIR DYED A DIFFERENT COLOR: nop but ive shaved it all off once

52. SPORT: used to sail, used to kayak, now i possess no skills. i actually ish i did have a sport i play regularly, but, i am a Lazy Fuck,

53. VACATION: aksdjfd i dont rmbr !! i travelled a lot when i was young. now we just go to neighboring countries over breaks sometimes.

54. PAIR OF TRAINERS: not converse low, that’s 4 sure

MORE GENERAL

55. EATING: nothing, but hopefully about to

56. DRINKING: nothing, but hopefully about to

57. I’M ABOUT TO: eat, drink, go home

58. WAITING FOR: senpai to answer my anon ask. senpai pls. senpai im dying here i only get wifi sporadically for like 10 min at a time senpai plsease

59. WANT:  see hoseok irl someday, to not fail my year end exams, to have a good future after this. if we’re going wildly unrealistic, give me financial stability and the power to play piano proficiently.

60. GET MARRIED: honestly i think this would depend on where i am in life, where my partner(s) is/are in life, and what we want out of our relationship (plus, my generation supposedly killed marriage, so)

61. CAREER: listen i used to want to be a lawyer real bad before i grew up and realized im a fuckign depressed idiot who cant do shit so now im just hoping for some kind of stable job that i wont hate,,,,,,i lean towards the social sciences, and they’re what im best at, but my fucking dumb ass is currenly taking natural sciences instead because ????? no fuckin clue, past me, what the fuck,

62. HUGS OR KISSES: i dont like hugs much, so kisses. though i do like to cuddle ??? i think ??? theoretically ???? normally i just dont let ppl touch me

63. LIPS OR EYES: lips

64. SHORTER OR TALLER: couldn’t care less but theres smth hot abt someone being taller than me (unrelated news kuroo is 187cm holy shit fuck T O W E R O V E R M E)

65. OLDER OR YOUNGER: as in ?? romantically ?? to be friends with ?? if it’s the former, almost definitely older. for the latter, i prefer older, but personality matters more than age does.

66. NICE ARMS OR NICE STOMACH: dont care. tho if u have arms that could snap my neck, 

67. SENSITIVE OR LOUD: as in me ?? listen im both. im both. but if we’re talking partners, i imagine kuroo is plenty loud, so that,

68. HOOK UP OR RELATIONSHIP: listen i dont care as long as it’s enjoyable and mutually beneficial

69. TROUBLEMAKER OR HESITANT: hm

have your ever:

70. KISSED A STRANGER: nop

71. DRANK HARD LIQUOR: nop

72. LOST GLASSES/CONTACT LENSES: yes, but found them

73. TURNED SOMEONE DOWN: ya!!

74. SEX ON THE FIRST DATE: nop

75. BROKEN SOMEONE’S HEART: not intentionally ??

76. HAD YOUR HEART BROKEN: : l i s t e n

77. BEEN ARRESTED: nop im a good upstanding citizen

78. CRIED WHEN SOMEONE DIED: as in irl ?? i dont think so

79. FALLEN FOR A FRIEND: hm, no, i,

do you believe in:

80. YOURSELF:  ya im great. im a piece of shit but *insert trash can not trash cannot meme*

81. MIRACLES: nah

82. LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT: nah

83. SANTA CLAUS: nah. attraction, maybe

84. KISS ON THE FIRST DATE: do what u want !! 

85. ANGELS: @wingjk is one so i can confirm

86. CURRENT BEST FRIENDS NAME(S): van, iv, jess are u a best friend or am i reading u wrong, id say drea but she’s my soulmate, id say nastya but she’s my wife and will complain i friendzoned her

other

87. EYE COLOUR: greenish

88. FAVOURITE MOVIE: casino royale !!! also all the ghibli things were my childhood

[thebolognablog]

Quarantine baby

Coming at you live from her bed, day 15 of quarantine, its me beech. Some shit has happened so lets dive in. Well for starters my work schedule changes literally daily now, so that’s great. I also now work opening everyday, its whatever money is money and its really not too bad. Secondly Keenen stayed with me for the first two weeks of the quarantine, that was dope we played games and cooked and watched a lot of new shows. He went home yesterday, and now I am alone which is just what my depression was waiting for. It creeped right in and has been slowly swallowing me whole tonight. I feel like I am drowning and there is nothing I can do. I’ve been crying for a while. Oh I finished tiger king, that shit is wild. But back to my lovely ~depression~ she is here and I feel useless and like I am only a burden on everyone in my life. I can’t keep my mood stable, my health is awful rn, I need to keep working out, I want to stop eating entirely but that will be hard to do. Since Keenen left I could probably get away with it, but I’ve come so far with that I don’t want old habits to creep in more than they already have. I just want to be happy, I know shrinking myself won’t make me happy but fuck it might help a little right? no wrong. This is wrong. Man I am sad and a mess. I think I have fully decided to fuck nexplanon in the ass because this is n o t working for me. This little implant sounds great until you realize its just a depression crazy bar IMPLANTED in you. Man fuck this shit i am out. So I think that will be coming out soon. I am considering doing a copper IUD they make periods kind of suck from what Ive been reading but they are hormone free and I want that. I stopped taking BC in high school because of migraines, and I have to say I am noticing more than usual now and im just so fucking sad and crazy right now. I just want to be me and just me. I dont want hormones or anything changing me. I am so sick of it. I am sick of everything. Literally the only thing stopping me from just yeeting in to obvilion and moving to some forest is my Dad and Keenen. So Shout out to them yall rock. Writing this out made me feel a bit better but idk how long this will help for. Ill try to update more too, this will be a cool thing to look back on. 

dope well bye for now,

-Stressed Depressed and not well dressed