#yall have sent some amazing requests and im so excited to work on them

[the-rule-of-beasts]

Yet another fic that took WAY TOO LONG to finish. I hope it turned out well, but I am incapable of mustering the attention span to proofread any of my writing so,,, we once again die like men in Leshy's cabin.

Anyway, I am once again announcing my love for Leshy. My beloved- old man. Beautiful.

Also shout out to both @kakusu-shipping and @your-stoat-stands-unopposed (I hope you guys don't mind my tagging you, lemme know if you do please!!) for being the inspiration for this one. I love how both of you write Leshy and I,, he deserves to be loved, okay?? I wanted to contribute to the 'making soup for the skrunkly' vibes.

Anyway!! Here ya go!!

New Slang (Leshy x GN!Reader)

In which you share a meal with the Scrybe of Beasts.

At this point, you had a bit of a sixth sense when it came to Leshy. You had known him long enough by now to be well aware of what he needed to survive, and to know just what he needed to thrive on top of that.

Annoyingly however, Leshy himself did not seem to be aware of these facts.

For example, Leshy did not necessarily need to eat. It certainly helped, but it was not a necessity for him. What he needed was sunlight and fresh air, just like a plant. This was something Leshy tended to forget, much to your ever present concern. He spent so much of his time in the dark that it felt a wonder he hadn’t gotten seriously ill by now. You imagined the things he did eat helped with that, but it wasn’t as good as some good old fashioned time in the sun.

And as far as eating went- while he did not need to, it was one of the habits that helped him feel his best. Frustratingly, the man only ever seemed to eat raw meat. Rather bloody raw meat, at that. You would admit, you weren’t exactly sure what a Scrybe’s dietary requirements were, but you imagined that only consuming piles of raw meat of varying sizes could not be the healthiest thing for him.

And that’s where you came in- more specifically, your plan for today.

It had been a long time since you had first arrived in Leshy’s forest realm, longer than you could truly recount. You had come as a challenger, then- vying to replace him out of all the Four and to finally amass some amount of power in this world. That aspiration had not lasted very long, though- it had ended the moment you sat at Leshy’s table and played your first game with him.

Not that you had lost, no! You had actually managed to beat him fairly handily.

No, what had happened was that he had smiled.

He had smiled, rather sweetly at that, and had gently congratulated you on the good plays you had apparently made. He praised you, and expressed his gratitude for having finally met a worthy match.

And you just… didn’t have the heart to keep going after that.

So instead, you decided to settle down in his woods. You made a little home for yourself, surrounded by trees and next to the river. You could hear the waterfalls at night, along with the rustling of trees and the faint song of the wildlife. Bushes of berries grew around the walls of your tiny cottage, and you had started a tiny garden out of vegetables and fruits you had managed to forage across his lands. You were finally at peace- and you owed all of that to Leshy.

Which was perhaps one of the reasons why you were so stubborn to make sure that the man would take some actual care of himself every once in a while.

It was late morning now as you approached his cabin, a wicker basket slung over your right arm and your left hand resting on the colorful quilt that rested atop the contents. It was blessedly cool, a pleasant moisture in the air hinting at a drizzle you may be getting later in the day. You smiled, your feet crunching against dirt and undergrowth as you walked the familiar path to his door. You did not even bother to knock anymore, you knew that he did not mind you showing up unannounced, instead shouldering open the door and setting your basket down on the table next to it. You scanned the room, your eyes almost glancing over Leshy’s looming form hunched over his table. His tail gently swayed back and forth, the tip occasionally twitching and thrashing- a sign that he was deep in thought. You glanced around the room proper, taking note of the very cold hearth and the exceedingly melted candles. He had obviously been up all night, likely working on a new encounter or something. And as admirable as that work ethic was, you could not help the worried sigh that escaped you.

You quietly closed the door behind you, moving towards the Scrybe and calling his name in a gentle voice. He did not seem to notice you until you placed a hand on his shoulder, his eyes coming back into focus and his head lifting from its bent position. He blinked a few times, readjusting to his surroundings before he looked down at you. You smiled as he took a second to process your presence, squeezing his arm as a smile of his own graced his features.

“Morning, Leshy,” you said, moving away from his side to examine the objects littering his table’s surface, “How long have you been up?”

He hesitated for a moment, his brows furrowing and his clawed fingers tapping against one another, “I am not sure. If it is morning already, then…”

You sighed, crossing your arms and leaning your hip against the table, “You’ve been up all night, haven’t you?”

He at least had the decency to look sheepish as he nodded.

You rolled your eyes, the gesture not lacking fondness and moved to thread your hand within his. He looked at you, a tad owlishly, cocking his head to one side and allowing you to playfully tug his arm.

“Well, come on then!” You said, pulling him up from his seat and towards the door, “It’s a lovely day, and I won’t abide you sitting alone in the dark for another minute.”

“But-“

“No buts!” You snapped, grabbing your basket from its resting place and once again shouldering the door open, “You are coming outside with me, and you are going to like it! Do you understand me, young man?”

That got a chuckle out of him, a deep, velvety sound that you could never get enough of. You smiled to yourself, leading him down the beaten path and towards the spot that you had picked out just for today.

It had hit noon when you both arrived at your destination, golden sunlight streaming through the trees and flickering upon the ground like candlelight. The clearing was painted a perfect shade of green, the sound of rustling leaves and distant birdsong adding a sweet warmth to the surroundings. In the very center, overgrown with moss and vines, was a toppled tree- long overtaken by the wilderness and blending in rather well with the dense undergrowth of the area. You had thought this place rather beautiful when you had first seen it, all idealistic and golden like a painting of old. You had picked it specifically for today, deciding that this would be the perfect location for your impromptu date with the Scrybe. You smiled up at him, watching Leshy’s wonderstruck expression with a warm sort of softness. His gaze swept across the landscape, eventually settling back on you when you gave his arm a gentle tug.

“Come on,” came your soft voice, Leshy finding himself unable to do anything but to follow you to the overgrown log. He sat besides you, finding that his chest clenched and his heart stuttered when you finally removed your tiny hand from his own. It took quite a bit of effort not to simply grab it back and force you to hold his hand for the rest of the day, and he was rather impressed with his self restraint- all things considered.

You weren’t quite paying attention to Leshy’s lovestruck expression as you unfolded your colorful quilt, laying it across the grass and beginning to lay out the feast you had carefully prepared for today. Fresh bread wrapped in embroidered cloth, blackberry jam, little bowls of blueberries and raspberries, venison you had bought from the Trapper, seasoned to your liking with sage and rosemary. There was honey wine, a project you had spent nearly the whole year on, infused with elderflower and berry. You set all this out with a careful hand, stealing a glance at Leshy’s surprised face and trying hard to hide your smug smile. You had planned this day for a whole week by now, and you hoped that a good meal would serve your beloved Leshy well.

You met his eyes with an adoring smile, placing a wooden plate before him and filling an earthen mug with your honey wine, sliding it next to the plate, “Eat as much as you want!”

He did not reply for a long moment, looking over the spread with an expression that was almost… teary. He shifted slightly, an uncertain hand reaching out until it hovered just above your own. He seemed to be lost completely in thought, his eyes darting between you, the food, your hand, and then back to your face. You smiled to yourself, shaking your head fondly and making the decision for him. You leaned up up and up, taking a moment to appreciate just how tall the Scrybe was even when sitting, and cupped his cheek in your hand. He snapped out of his reverie, looking rather like a frightened fawn, his eyes wide and his lips parting ever so slightly in his surprise.

It was during times like these when you remembered just how strangely cute Leshy could be.

You gently pulled his head towards your own, pressing your forehead against his and closing your eyes for a moment. It was only when you felt him finally relax in your hand that you opened them again, studying his contented expression and the fluttering of his eyelashes against his cheeks. You trailed a languid path with your thumbs, reveling in the feeling of moss and brush tickling your skin. You smiled, you did that a lot around Leshy, exhaling a breathy laugh and finally- finally doing the very thing you had wanted to do since meeting him.

You kissed him, gentle as rain and as sweet as your honey wine, your eyes closing and his form all but melting against you. Neither of you knew how long the kiss lasted, and neither of you particularly cared. It was the here and now that mattered, the dappled sunlight dancing across your tangled limbs like starlight on a crystalline lake.

Leshy did not let go of you, even after you finally managed to pull away from each other. His side pressed against yours and his long tail wrapped around your waist. He ate and drank, mumbling thanks and sweet nothings in a language that sounded like music. And when the meal was finished, when the wine was drunk and the sun had begun to paint the sky a soft and luminescent pink, he laid himself down on your lap, reveling in the feeling of your deft fingers combining through his wild hair, gently picking dead and dying foliage from the mass.

If there was ever a moment in time he would want to immortalize, he thought, it would be now. Now, with his dearest and most beloved. Here, where he was loved and cared for in a way he had never experienced before.

And you? You were more than happy to continue to care for him. He was the sun in the sky, and you would happily pluck the stars for him, move mountains, turn the very moon in the sky into a ring befitting of his beauty.

But all that could wait. For now was for soft quiet. Now was for an old love blossoming at last. Now was for an ancient song’s swelling, joyous refrain.

Now was for you and Leshy, and you would not change that for the world.

[rogue-rook]

many highlights from The Stolen Century from a first-time TAZ listener (here there be spoilers)

oh hot damn a flashbacks episode!!!!!

“everything begins, and i mean that quite literally, with the light of creation”

the IPRE has some real nostalgic space exploration nasa vibes to it

travis: “i would like to state that, canonically, magnus calls him “cap’nport” because magnus, like I, loves portmanteau”

suggested names for the ship boat thing: boaty mcboatface, spinnaker (which just means boat), stinky spinnaker, laser spinnaker, hyper spinnaker, flying boat, tail spinnaker, fighting spinnaker, lightbringer, sky spinnaker, sky boat, sky weaver, star dancer, starblaster! the winner! starblaster!

the way they arrived at “starblaster” was such peak mcelroy Creative Nonsense

the reporters at this IPRE press conference have had increasingly silly names

justin: “taako and lup go to a bar and do what they always do at a bar, which is hustle people at pool” i love them so much! i didn’t love taako all that much for the majority of this story but now i think he’s cool as shit

I’m so SO SO SO SO SO EXCITED for lup to be a part of this and be a real character and not just a fucking GHOST haunting taako’s umbrella

magnus wants to go train with the bear of power and that’s the most on-brand thing for him to possibly want to do

travis: “magnus doesn’t kill animals if he can help it” not animals, but of course he has no problem killing dwarves, elves, liches, wizards, ya know, all those PEOPLE he’s killed

justin: “taako and lup are gonzo, they're out of here" magnus: “i’m like checking on bear cubs and making sure everyone's okay" merle: “im like increasing everybody’s speed with spells’ very on brand of everybody here

travis: “okay griffin i have a very important question that i should have asked before-” griffin: “is about your fucking hard candy supply?”

the entire set up of this arc is so fun and good 

justin: “yeah i've got a fucking genius plan and I'm gonna fix everything! come close, griffin, because I'm about to blow your game wide open. I’m going to make a fake light of creation. I’m gonna spend this year like a survivor contestant on their last legs, crafting a false hidden immunity idol. I’m going to craft, to the best of my ability, a fake light of creation. a decoy, if you will!” THIS IS GENIUS

taako: “okay, that’s all well and good but lup and i are going scrapping. this is the most civilized- this is the most technologically advanced place that we’ve been to yet, and I wanna load the ship up with all the valuable mechanical components I can find, so I’m going fucking looting, I’m gonna destroy as many robots as it takes, I’m gonna take these motherfuckers apart piecemeal, so I can take whatever cool magic is powering them. I’m going to loot this motherfucker to brass tacks, I’m gonna just loot and pillage” merle: “burnt earth” taako: “yes exactly”

lup: “i believe one of these times we’re going to get this right. and we’re going to find a way to defeat the hunger and save everybody inside of it. I have to believe that to keep doing what we do, becasue I have to believe that I’m going to get those 15 dollars back from greg fucking grimmaldis” lup is as cool and funny and DOPE as I was hoping she would be

one of these eps, they just kicked it on a beach for 35 minutes and were shitheads about merle’s attempt at gifts. the literal goddamn definition of a bottle episode. im only like 75% sure davenport was even in this fucking episode

travis has named magnus’s fish, magnus’s father-in-law, a rando reporter at the IPRE press conference, and a kid at one of the stolen century planets “steven”. all of those people/fish are called steven, because apparently travis has a thing for that name

clint just called lucretia “lucinda”

well now i understand why merle’s died 50 million times

taako: “i got bad news for everybody. our arch-nemesis is MORRISSEY”

magnus gets excited to learn to carve wood bc its something he could do with knives and weapons and shit and im like oh THATS the most magnus thing he could possibly do!!!

hey cool so barry and lup’s adorable love OWNS MY ASS

that was the sweetest falling-in-love story ive ever heard and it was like 5 fucking minutes. @ fanfiction writers throw all your barry/lup friends-to-lovers fics directly at my head PLEASE

davenport: “lup can you blow it up?" lup: "can i...blow up a mountain?....well, YEAH! but lets save that for a last resort" the legato conservatory person: “i'm going to firmly request that you don’t blow up our sacred mountain”

taako: “hey I’m taako, from TV” griffin: “uh okay-” justin: “what?” griffin: “you haven’t been on tv yet” clint: “it’s aspirational” justin: “yeah, its aspirational. hey I’m taako from TV. you’re all pretty wanged. you’re pretty fucked. there’s good news and bad news, and the bad news I’ve already covered, with the fucked-ness that you are”

jesus, shit got DARK

oh my god the voidfish that magnus saved in the stolen century is the same one on the bureau of balance base. that’s some heart-tingly shit. that’s that GOOD STORY SHIT

griffin: “your adventures in the back half of these cycles are more fraught than the first half” OH IM SORRY? MORE FRAUGHT??? REALLY, GRIFFY?

griffin’s judge character dude: "magnus, you have fought with others your entire life, throughout your adolescence you celebrated strife. i didn't mean to make that rhyme"

one of the future crimes accused of the IPRE crew is “cruelty to a child who loves them” and im like oh. maybe i shouldnt have wanted somebody to call them out on being mean to sweet ango

oh man i wanna hug lucretia so bad and take care of her and make sure she’s okay

griffin: “she wouldn’t go on to found the bureau of balance for decades, but this horrible lonely year, that’s when she became Madame Director” okay, yep, i love her, and i just remembered i was worried for SO LONG that she was hoarding the relics for her own gain and jesus christ IM SO SORRY I THOUGHT THAT, EVERYBODY, I REGRET IT SO BAD

magnus reading fisher the voidfish a story more like GREAT JOY AND HAPPINESS

justin: “taako like walks by [the voidfish] and you just hear him shout ‘give him the complete works of nathaniel hawthorne next!” griffin: “YOU FUCKING HATE THAT GUY!” justin: “fuck that guy” clint: “what do you have against nathaniel hawthorne???” justin: “he is the worst writer and everybody has to read him and it makes kids HATE reading” clint: “last of the mohicans???” justin: “thats- not him, thats james fenimore cooper” griffin: “BOO-YAH!!! [singing] take him toooo schoool” justin: “yall i know the name of TWO authors from that time period, and he did the ONE pull, that’s gonna sound so fucking smart” oh man maybe I really need to reevaluate my ranking of Favorite Mcelroys, justin just reached for the Deepest Cut To Make Me Love Him

magnus: “i don’t find anything useful in this library, so let that be a lesson, kids, you’ll never find anything useful reading books” yeah take that, you punk ass book jockeys

griffin: “I base it on just how much i like the scene, right? so take plus two bond” whoa what GRIFFY DOESN’T EVEN HAVE A SYSTEM FOR THIS SHIT?? HE’S JUST HANDING OUT BONDS AND ASSETS WILLY NILLY????

magnus: “oh, could i have been learning magic instead of feeding books to my buddy?” griffin: “your scene was really good though” magnus: “oh man i could have become a wizard” yeah and break the continuity of THE ENTIRE GODDAMN SHOW

this Lup and Taako’s Greatest Day chaotic destruction is the most fun shit that’s happened in this show

taako: “I pull off her blindfold to reveal this planet’s ONLY DMV. there’s one DMV on the entire planet” this planet has no people and no animals and no living anything besides the 7 ipre crew and yet there’s a DMV leftover from whatever civilization used to be here. UH UH UH SURE JUSTIN

jesus christ i can’t believe lup’s lich form dabbed in the goddamn middle of this ritual

travis: “griffin, i know this wasn't in the instructions you sent us, but I want to make a lightsaber, can I do that?" griffin: "absolutely not!"

the KrebStar is a dope name

griffin: "so like a lotta bear stuff, then, huh?" travis: "look im leaning into it"

travis: “I’m going to name the helmet BearFace- ya know, naming stuff isn’t magnus’s strong suit- and I’m going to call the pendant 2th Necklace”

griffin: “and she’s holding an umbrella” justin: “fuck you” THIS MOMENT IS SOOO GOOD

justin: "I think i speak for the rest of us, and like the entire audience, when i say I cannot wait to see what these fucking 7 items are"

“that was the last conversation you had with your sister” hey griffin. fuck you

“not all exits are equal” HEY GRIFFIN. REALLY REALLY FUCK YOU

oh man lucretia. i can’t believe you did that to everybody. man that’s. that’s rough

this is heartbreaking holy shit. barry begging his bestfriend TO KILL HIM so he won’t forget the love of his life is SOME GUTWRENCHING SHIT HOLY SHIT

this is a really amazing story and I’m so impressed with the way it evolved from a goofy mcelroy joke podcast into such an amazing compelling story