#y'know if we really want to do it again I'd say things can't get much worse than they already have
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qsmpbutwithsignlanguage · 10 months ago
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I feel like this is suddenly relevant, but if anyone wants the input of the person who kind of organized it all:
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I still find their response absurdly funny
Can we have another qsmp language day please after all we’ve been through it’d be nice to do a community event again…
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aplaceforhumancorpses · 28 days ago
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🍵༘PANCAKES🥯⊹ ࣪ ˖
„⤵ MILD ANGST and fluff! „⤵ 2 / (?) PARTS „⤵ JASON TODD X READER Jason is getting settled in his new home, after showing up at your door last night. Jason is a dead man walking, but he still needs you. Read PT 1 here! AFFECTION ROTS Reblogs much appreciated
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The two of you eventually found the couch. You sat next to him, putting a throw pillow's distance between the two of you. Much to his disappointment. Jason was more clingy then he had ever been before. Absence makes the heart grow fonder. A few hours passed. You had both fallen asleep sometime after midnight. That morning he explained everything as best as he could to you, his death at the hands of the joker, the crowbar, the ressurection. Despite the granted confusion you followed as best you could. He told you everything. Everything that happened from the moment he died. He really missed you, despite the two of you being dumb in love teeangers. He still saw a future with you, and you were wary to admit you weren't sure you saw the same. He was diffrerent. Bigger, taller, stronger. And somehow more alive, than anything before. “I'm sorry." You managed to say. You felt like such a coward. You couldn't handle touching him, or holding his hand.
“I can't blame you. It'll take some time." He said sadly. You could see in his eyes that he was blaming himself. "You're doing great… I really am proud of you. Just wish we could've done all this… together, y'know?" he said the last part quietly, almost a whisper. You looked down, unable to hold eye contact.
"Things are a little bit different now. You know that right? I can't change my past. Even though I'd like to." You spoke slowly. "You know, it's gonna take some time. I don't regret our relationship. Never have."
”You're serious, huh?" he raised an eyebrow. It was nearly commical. You were devestating him with every word you spoke. "I wanted us to do this forever, you know? Like… forever. You've always been on my mind.. guess I should've known things weren't gonna stay the same. You're not fifteen anymore.." he mumbled.
He had a faraway look in his eye. You wondered how much of this story he had clearly made up inside his mind depended on you reciprocating his tender feelings. But you knew this was his way of trying to comfort you, despite his broken soul. He would give you time… "Do you remember our first date?" He suddenly asked. He smiled shyly, looking down at his lap. The image came unbidden to your mind, vivid and perfect. You remembered how much effort he put into planning. He was more thorough then any man. He was attentive, and a good listener. So why were you hesitant..? Maybe it was his dependency. “Um. Yes I remember- Um.. do you want breakfast?.." You said weakly, standing up and turning towards the kitchen, leaving him to his own thoughts. "I can make us something quick…" You heard him sigh in disappointment. When you finally turned around again, his elbows were on his knees. He was curled into himself. You knew he was trying to be strong. But it was hard to admire his strengths when he looked so pitiful.. It broke your heart. "I'm making pancakes.. Do you want some? They're grainy but- edible." You offered hesitantly.
“Yeah.. sounds good.” His voice cracked. He didn’t have a good relationship with food. After the truama of his death and even before that with the joker, he hadn’t been hungry at all. He never wanted food.. and when he did it threw it up promptly. Food always felt unsafe to him. And that included food cooked by you.. which seemed ironic, because he would have worshipped the ground beneath you if you asked him to.
He wondered if he watched the whole process of cooking from start to finish if he would feel better about it. He could trick his brain into understanding he was safe.
“God you’re so gorgeous..” He sighed. “I’m tired of falling for you all over again… s’not fair. Why can’t I have you?” You paused, setting the pan on the stove as it heated up. Melting the butter into a bubbly golden liquid. There was no denying he had changed a lot. He went from 4”6 to an even 6 foot. You could see the stretch marks that painted his hips whenever he lifted his arms up. Despite your ‘disinterest’ in him romantically, you would still take small peeks and glances whenever his shirt rode up, revealing some of the new muscle he had gained.
His sudden growth wasn’t unwelcome, it was just shocking that he had grown that much within the span of a few years. Especially considering he had always been smaller than you.
But you had accepted his advances with only halfhearted interest. Even if he was a handsome behemoth of a man today. But it was hard to deny the fact that when he looked at you like he did now, you felt a lingering warmth.
He hadn’t lost his charm. He still knew how to make you blush and smile. But maybe you were too afraid of losing what you shared with him.. again..
As you began making the pancake mix he kept his gaze trained on you and the food. He was obviously enthralled with it.. “I like strawberries.” He smiled softly, watching you work through the recipe. He’d always loved watching you cook. It reminded him of home.. it was vaguely reminiscent of Alfred. Even if he hated the Waynes he still missed having a family. “They remind me of you.” He continued. “Those soft, shiny pinkish red ones…” You nodded along to his words. He was always so sentimental.. “They smell like spring.” He added, smiling slightly. You felt yourself relax at his words. He could be sweet sometimes, despite the fact he was now, 10x his size, strength, and power. He was probably better at a lot of things now, you didn’t want to know what he would do to any of the failed relationships you had in your contacts still... But it was clear he still had that innocent side that you once loved. Jason was like weathered plastic in the garden, his old self was fading, but the spots where the sunlight hadn’t burned away the old Jason todd were still as vibrant and tender as ever. He seemed happier than usual too. His cheeks had begun to lighten up again, his skin seemed to glow from just having seen you again.
The food was ready, and you brought him over to the table. “I’m not an amazing cook, but I hope it’s okay….” You handed him the fork. He was silent for a while, staring at the plate in front of him.
“I uh.. I’m usually not so good with food but this does look really good I promise. It feels like I constantly have the flu. My mind is all fucking broken.."
"You deserve a break." You said, sitting opposite of him across the table. Your fingers intertwined tightly with your own beneath the table, under the table. You tried to suppress your nerves. He needed comfort and support now, you couldn't give him more. "You're here.. With me.. That's something." You said, trying to encourage him.
“I still want you. So bad..” He mumbled. His fork clinked against his plate as he set it down gently. You took a deep breath. You didn’t know what to say. You weren’t ready to talk about your problem with the matter of your relationship. You just wanted him to eat, and try to get better..
“Jason-“ You warned.
“Do you still love me?” He interrupted. He was trying to sound calm, but he was clearly agitated. The question threw you off guard. He looked at you with wide, desperate eyes. “Answer honestly. I need to know.” You hesitated.
“Yes.” You answered truthfully, not able to hide the hurt on your face.
“You don’t even want to touch me…” he muttered dejectedly.
“You died- I was at your funeral.. I don’t understand how your here right now..” you said firmly. “I’m just… confused, ok? I thought I understood everything..” You were trembling. You knew he saw, he understood. You didn’t know how to deal with the guilt gnawing at your stomach.. You hated seeing him this upset. “I miss you..” he whispered, staring at you with pleading eyes.
You lowered your gaze and shook your head. “I’m sorry- you.. Do you have a place to stay?..”
“Are you kicking me out?..”
“Well no- but I feel bad for making you sleep on the couch.” You explained. “You’ve done nothing wrong.. I’m sorry… do you want to stay?”
He remained silent and slowly ate the food placed in front of him. His lips forming into a thin line. He looked exhausted. But he was eating the meal you had made, albeit reluctantly and very slowly. It took him about 20 minutes, as he finished every bite without looking up or saying a word.
“Yeah. I want to stay here for a bit.” He replied after he finished chewing. You nodded, relieved. He pushed back the chair and stood up. He looked exhausted.
“I’ll get you some blankets.” You said quietly, walking back to your room to bring some out to him. While searching your closet, you heard soft footsteps behind you. Your body froze for a split second. Just Jason.. Just Jason…. Then you relaxed. You pulled out two fluffy blankets. You walked back towards him, throwing them over his shoulders. He let out a content sigh at the warmth. “It smells like you…” he mused. He looked so at peace. Like you had injected life into him for the first time since he got here.
He grabbed one pillow from your bed and squeezed it. He closed his eyes, feeling the soft material against his skin. You couldn’t help but smile softly. He looked at you like you hung the moon in the sky. A sense of wonder and relief washing over his features. He turned to the doorway, making his way to the living room.
The television flickered dimly on your TV stand. Your DVD’s stacked high, mostly disney and other classics. “I love you so much..” he murmured, looking around your home.
“I…” You paused. “Know.. you do..” you trailed off, not knowing how else to respond. It felt weird hearing those words come from him. You spent nights hoping to hear those exact words just.. one more time. Hearing them now..
“Where were you?” You asked, trying to distract yourself from the overwhelming guilt weighing down your chest.
“Oh y’know…” He shrugged. “Just…” he laughed awkwardly before sitting down on the couch. “Just running around doing shit. Nothing serious.” He admitted. “But I was able to find you eventually. I actually used to sit in the parking lot and stare at your apartment door, waiting for you to open it..” he looked embarrassed to admit that, scratching the side of his jaw. You chuckled lightly at that image. “You should have seen it, though! I sat there until my legs went numb and then I finally decided to walk away because I felt kinda creepy sitting there watching like that..” He grinned, remembering how pathetic and childish it sounded. “But, I had to see you last night. I had to talk to you... See how you were...” He said, sadly. “God…I’m really messed up.” He sighed, dropping his gaze onto the floor. You frowned as you noticed his mood swing.
“I missed you too-… I’m glad you’re back, and I’m sorry I’m being so cold.” You apologised.
He gave you an understanding glance, “you can be pretty difficult to read these days.. I just.. I hope you can understand my intentions. I still want you.”
“Night Jay.” You stood up, attempting to run away from the topic. “I have class in the morning. I gotta get some sleep. I have a presentation coming up.” You walked towards the bedroom, but stopped. You didn’t want to leave him alone yet. What happened wasn’t fair. “I’ll be back around 12 or so.. tomorrow.”
“Goodnight baby.” He sighed, laying down on the couch. You smiled at his nickname.
He stayed sleeping in his makeshift bed the whole evening, until 4 am or so when he slipped out from the blankets and into your room. He was just getting up to check on you, but eventually it became him… getting a closer look.. getting in bed. and passing out next to you. These blankets were big enough to cover him completely, no cold feet. There was barely any distance between you.
“Night..” he said softly, pressing a gentle kiss to the top of your head. He laid down facing away from you, but in his mind he was holding you close, his arms wrapped tightly around you. ...
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annwrites · 4 months ago
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— billy hargrove quotes  ⏧·₊̣̇. “ | thoroughfare
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❝Hey, sweetheart, need a ride?❞
❝Sorry, you say somethin’, baby? I can’t hear you over the stereo!❞
❝Friday Night at the drive-in theater they’re having a showing of Nightmare on Elm Street. I was wondering if you’d want to go with me? Don’t worry, if you get scared, I’ll hold your hand.❞
❝Don’t waste your time, man. She’s a fuckin’ prude.❞
❝Y/N, who did this? I’ll fuckin’ kill him.❞
❝You want to go west and so do I. So, we might as well go together. At least you’ll be safe if you’re with me.❞
❝I'm not the one that gave her a tune-up. So, you want to ring my shit up now, or what?❞
❝If you think I'm about to let you behind the wheel, sweetie, you have another thing comin'.❞
❝You worry too damn much, darlin'. Might help you relax if you just got laid.".
❝See somethin' you like, darlin'?❞
❝Oh yeah, she wants me.❞
❝Because I don't need to worry about your ass disappearin'. And I'm fuckin' beat, so I'm not going back out. Close the damn door.❞
❝Knew I'd get you into bed eventually.❞
❝I don't mind 'em fiesty, y'know.❞
❝Mornin', sunshine. You sleep good? I know I did.❞
❝You want to take your frustrations out on me, baby? I can think of lots of funner ways to do it.❞
❝Just trying to get you to lighten up a little, sugar. You know, you are allowed to have fun.❞
❝You want to play footsie, darlin'?❞
❝Touch her again and I'll beat your fuckin' ass! You hear me, asshole?❞
❝Stay down, if you know what's fuckin' good for you.❞
❝Fine, yeah, I'm fuckin' jealous! That what you wanted to hear? Huh?❞
❝If you need somethin' else to lick, I know where you can put your tongue at, sweetheart.❞
❝I think you like getting those perfect feathers ruffled.❞
❝I definitely think at least one thing is pretty.❞
❝Trying to kiss you, pretty girl.❞
❝You're stuck with me, baby.❞
❝Please come back with me. I can't do this without you.❞ (...) ❝I don't want to be alone anymore.❞
❝You should see me under the hood of this thing, sweetheart. I’d really have you sweating then.❞
❝We’ll have to pick you up a bikini, sweetheart.❞
❝Oh, c’mon. Just try this one on. Humor me, honey.❞
❝Oh, baby, you should know by now: I’m not one to give up easily.❞
❝You should see what else these fingers are good at playing with.❞
❝Might want to slip your suit on, too if we're going to swim. Unless you'd rather skinny dip?❞
❝I'll tell you this much, honey, the water won't be the only thing making you wet tonight if I have anything to say about it.❞
❝You don't have to keep it together all the time with me. You can be whoever you want now; do whatever you want. No one's going to stop you.❞
❝I'll have to get you liquored up so I can finally take advantage of you.❞
❝God, you're such a fuckin' tease. I don't buy the innocent act anymore, so don't bother with it.❞
❝Be a lot warmer if you just pressed yourself up against me again like last night.❞
❝I'm not tired. You could always help with that.❞
❝Honey, if you wanted to spoon, all you had to do was ask.❞
❝No, that's not my pistol, before you ask. I'm just that happy to see you.❞
❝If you want to keep playing hard-to-get, sweetheart, we still have plenty days of driving before us, so we can play that game. Just know you won’t win.❞
❝I have no problem hand-feeding you, princess.❞
❝I’m nothing if not a man of my word, baby. I told you that you were stuck with me. I meant that. So I’ll wait for however long you want to keep holding out for. You take that to mean whatever you want it to.❞
❝Your hair looks nice, since I never told you. I was right: it makes you look hot.❞
❝You think I acted that way because I didn’t like you?❞ (...) ❝It’s the very opposite. You should know that by now, honey.❞
❝You want to talk, then we’ll talk. But I need to get my blood-alcohol level up first.❞
❝You like my package, sweetheart?❞
❝That your way of asking me to be sweet on you, baby?❞
❝I only had eyes for you since day one, baby. There was just somethin' about you, I guess. Honestly, I think it was the fact you never tried to get my attention.❞ (...) ❝Every man likes a chase. And I'll be damned if you haven't given me one. A few times.❞
❝But once I had her in the backseat and we got down to business, there was only one girl on my mind, and it sure as hell wasn't her.❞
❝You need a hand with that, baby?❞
❝Fuck,❞ (...) ❝Are you always this wet?❞
❝That feel good, honey?❞
❝When you come, sweetheart, I want you to fucking scream my name. I want half this damn place to hear it.❞
❝That's it, baby, come for me. C'mon, sweetheart, you're almost there.❞
❝That's my fuckin' girl.❞
❝Fuck, that's fuckin' perfect. Just like that, angel.❞
❝I'm so fuckin' close, baby. I'm about to cum. Fuck, keep going. Jesus Christ.❞
❝God, that was fuckin' perfect.❞
❝Please, angel, no one has said it to me since my mom left. Please... I feel it, too.❞
❝I know it’s not your monthly or I would’ve found out as much last night with my hand between your legs.❞
❝Don’t ever fucking touch her again! You hear me, you fuckin’ piece of shit?❞
❝You’re fucking mine. You understand me? You’re mine.❞
❝Next time I see another guy touching you, I won’t stop until I have fucking killed him.❞
❝Please don’t go. I’m in love with you.❞
❝I didn’t want to acknowledge it—admit it. I mean, fuck, what if you didn’t feel the same?❞
❝But I just…started seeing you differently the more we spent time together.❞
❝Please don’t leave. I’ll do fucking anything. Please, Y/N. I…I can’t lose you, too. Please, God, I’m begging you, stay.❞
❝I love you. Please. I’ll change, I’ll do whatever it takes. I’ll be whoever you need me to be. Just don’t walk out that door, I’m fuckin’ begging you.❞
❝Just let me prove to you that I can be better. The kind of man that’s worthy of you.❞
❝Angel, I know I don’t deserve you. Fuck, I probably never will. And I know you deserve a hell of a lot better than me. But you’re all I want. I’ve never wanted anything as badly as I want you. I…I need you. Just, what can I do to fix this?❞
❝I want you. Now. Maybe...maybe forever. I guess we can figure that part out together. If you'll still have me. If you could ever fuckin' forgive me for all the shit I've done—put you through. It's not always going to be perfect. I'm going to piss you off and keep getting on your last nerve for my own amusement. I'll never stop being a pain in your ass. But it's only because I—❞ He sighs. ❝Because I love you. So, please, just stay. I think... I think that we belong together. Who the hell else is going to put up with me the way you have? Who else could ever understand the shit I've been through but someone else who's been through it, too?❞
❝Honey, I don't want anybody else.❞
❝You have no idea what it meant to me, sweetheart. A lot. Before...whatever shit I did with a girl was just sex. Not intimacy. Things are different with you.❞
❝I didn't know what the fuck to do with that: being in love. So I did the only thing I knew how to and punished you for it. For making me fall for you. Even if that had never been your intention, it happened anyway. It was always going to, I think.❞
❝You've been a naughty girl and you're getting punished.❞
❝Jesus. Easy, killer. I said park it, not give me whiplash.❞
❝Now, how the fuck am I supposed to behave myself when I know what you look like under your clothes now?❞
❝You realize that when we're alone in a room together, I'm not letting you wear clothes ever again?❞
❝I can't believe you're finally mine.❞
❝Shh, I know. You're close, aren't you, sweetheart?❞
❝You're lucky I didn't finish in my fucking jeans just now.❞
❝You do know driving my car isn't the only thing I'm going to be teaching you, right?❞
❝I'll never love anyone else the way I love you, not after everything we've been through. Only we understand each other. No one else ever could—will. You're mine. Forever.❞
❝You're going to fucking cum this time.❞
❝God, you’re fucking soaked. I can hear just how wet you are.❞
❝C’mon, baby, I know you like this. Tell me what you need.❞
❝Tell me how to get you to cum all over my cock, doll.❞
❝You’re fuckin’ insatiable. And I thought my sex-drive was bad.❞
❝I told you I always get what I want.❞ (...) ❝I meant you, baby. It was always you.❞
❝Y’know what, putting you in cuffs at some point seems like a good idea, too, now that you mention it.❞
❝God, you look so fucking hot right now. You’re perfect, honey.❞
❝Maybe I should see what my shifter looks like inside of you next.❞
❝Now there's an idea. You want me to pull your hair, honey? I always wondered what it'd feel like wrapped around my fist.❞
❝Maybe I'll let you yank on mine, too, next time I have my head between your legs.❞
❝Besides, how the hell am I supposed to sleep with you pressed up against me like this all night?❞
❝My face has been between your legs, making a meal out of the place you piss from, and that's what turns you off?❞
❝Baby doll, you're on fire, how do you feel cold?❞
❝Without...without you, all of it means nothing. It'll have all been for nothing. It was for you. All this shit.❞
❝Incase you haven’t figured it out yet, I’m the jealous type.❞
❝Was half-tempted to get my knuckles bloody for you back then, too. Just from him asking you out alone. And right in front of me, at that.❞
❝So, I finally flipped her on her stomach, pretended it was you, and laid some pipe. End of story.❞
❝Not your type, huh? Guess I’m the real winner here after all. So, what was it about me, then? My car? My rebel attitude? My devilishly good looks.❞
❝I wouldn’t have done all of this for anyone else.❞
❝Just trying to show my girl a good time. What, you've never been young and in love before?❞
❝C'mon, baby, we'll go blow a grand at Circus Circus instead.❞
❝Think you might be my little good-luck charm.❞
❝Not my fault that my cock is all you can think about.❞
❝You should know by now that I’m in this for the long haul. That you’re it for me. I know you deserve better than me. You always will. But I’ll try my best, alright? To be a good dad. I had a shitty fuckin’ example, but maybe I can learn from his mistakes. I’ll take care of you.❞
❝We’ll…we’ll get married. I’ll be better than he was. I have to be. You deserve that.❞
❝Don’t worry, baby, you won’t be wearing it long.❞
❝I love you. I love you. I love you.❞
❝Promise me that you’re mine for forever.❞
❝Man, that is one hot mama.❞
❝You’re lucky I’ve already got you knocked up. Because if I didn’t?❞ (...) ❝You’d be on your back right now getting bred.❞
❝Trust me, kid, you could do a lot worse when it comes to parents.❞
❝I’m gonna marry that girl one day.❞
❝Not a good day unless I’ve gotten on your last nerve, sweetheart.❞
❝Well, well, look who it is.❞
❝Somebody specific you’re trying to catch the attention of tonight, sweetheart?❞
❝So, what’s that pretty lil’ heart desire?❞
❝If you’re lookin’ for fun, I’m right here, honey.❞
❝You’re dancing with a man, not a boy.❞
❝You look really pretty tonight. I don’t think I told you that.❞
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bendyartistic · 5 months ago
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Be Aware of alexbstudios. (Part 2) TW: uh.. slur, sui mention.
Recently I've been requested by some people to make another awareness post about Alex, and what has been going on since I made my last callout. So.. let's take a look. I'm gonna be honest I have been paying little to no attention to him at all since my post up until this point, didn't think I'd have to.
Ever since I made it, Alex has been talking about me a lot more, and it feels much more obsessive in a way. I think it's funny but also pretty weird considering some of the things he's said about me. Eugh.
Anyways let's get to the stuff from after my callout to the present. This is just a rundown of everything, and there is some stuff I skipped since I didn't feel it was worth mentioning. Once my post had been made, a lot of people went over and said stuff to him (Though I didn't encourage that behavior, I only wanted to make my post so people knew about him, I'm not covering those unless it's important in this.) Little afterwards he made this... post. Erh, are you stalking me and other people?? ALSO don't say the r slur man, like what.
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I find it really creepy that he has this list, and has notes along with them about why/who they are. Also why'd he spell my partners name like that? 💀 Next a little after that he reblogged someone's art and introduction saying this. (I don't want to really @ people in this, nor get anyone involved unless they asked to be.)
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I still don't understand how Alex views me, but saying this in a reblog no less is so strange. Reblogging another post, saying this with it...
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You're right Alex, I didn't need you in my life, yet here we are. Unfortunately. Besides that, no, 12 year old's should NOT be on Tumblr at all, even with restrictions, said restriction should be having the app blocked from their device.
I'm just gonna.. move on from that. Alex reblogged an art post, where he proceeded to @ over 50 people, myself included, saying "surely you can see the problem". I can't fit the entire thing sadly. I don't get what the point in these posts are honestly, besides annoy everyone. He's done it before as well. He got into a small bit of beef with a handful of folk not too long ago, which I got @'ed in at some point I think, didn't really pay much attention to it. Basically the original post is someone talking about art supplies and asking what one's other people use, which I personally think was a very neat post. Alex comes around though for some reason going off on nonsense. Hello? Who invited you!? (Again, censoring names cuz I don't want to get ppl involved.)
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I'm honestly kind of wondering why he even showed up. He pretty soon after made this dumb post as if it could have some effect on the situation.. uh?
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I guess mark your calendars guys for this date, where we have to immediately forget everything and forgive him! /j And there's this response he gave to an anon responding to his ✨patience✨ post.
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Dunno, so far it hasn't because he's still talking about it, so clearly he hasn't gotten over it enough to let it blow over.
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He's giving me those like.. stupid sigma edit vibes sometimes. Y'know what I'm talking about? Yeah. Also I'm not sure what to say about this really, but it's pretty funny.
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Context for this next one: You and the person on your lockscreen fight god..? That's a weird one.
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Wdym racist though? 🤨 Genuinely kinda curious about that. Btw wouldn't that make you like.. 9?? On a different note, I saw him previously talk about this "friend" he has going to a mental hospital, but I know nothing about it, nor do I really want to, however reblogging on an art post saying this feels off. Think the emotes are what do it.
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Don't joke about mental hospitals at all, I shouldn't have to explain why. I'm going to move on from all the short stuff now because I do wanna start talking instead of making short joking comments.
Alex made this post, and so it begins with him talking about me again, eh?
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Alex, you're already doomed. I can't put it any other way but from what I've seen maybe only 1 or 2 people even like you. The rest either hate you or want to avoid you at all cost, and I don't blame them at all considering you act like a fool and make everyone uncomfortable.
For my thoughts on you? I don't like you, never did. I just have to put up with you because this is the internet, and you'll probably never truly leave me alone like I once hoped. It's a shame honestly that you cannot follow a simple request from anyone. Don't think I don't know about your planned "response post" you're making, I'm still waiting for it. I don't know what good it's gonna do you though. Personally I don't care if you make one, I'd just read it to see the stuff you make up in it lol. (Edit: He decided to stop working on it after seeing this post lol.)
Enough of my rambling, I should continue with this so I can stop talking about him sooner. Regrettably I had to actually look up what this was about, I felt.. iffy reading it.
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Saying gyatt right afterwards wasn't funny. At all. I'm quite upset now. There was absolutely no reason for that.
I was gonna be reasonable and say something genuine but I don't feel like it anymore, this ruined my mood. All I have to say is as much as I dislike you, don't actually do that. Sadly moving to the next nonsensical thing, he made a poll post asking this. (It's still ongoing btw)
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Are people like.. forced into giving a reason? Like if I for example chose Bendy, am I immediately supposed to state my reasons? What if I don't want to, are we being held at gunpoint? What's up with that? I'm too lazy to interact with the post, I don't really feel like it anyways even if I wasn't lazy. Which one would you choose though lol I'm going to be serious now again cause this last thing is really just.. what the fuck. Palestine related 🍉, someone asking for help came to Alex, and this was his response to it...
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MY GOD Alex. Did you really have to respond to that in this immature, insensitive fucking manner? Could it have not been in one of your stupid rambling posts. It should've been. I'm sorry to the person and I'm sorry I had to read it. You're pretty sick honestly. You need help.
That's it. I'm done.
In conclusion:
Alex is still the same and is still never going to change probably. He still shouldn't be here and I believe he really should get off now more than ever. If not I fear what else he might do next.
All I can really tell you folks is please, DNI with Alex, just leave him alone and block him. You're again not obligated to, but I am suggesting it if you want to be left alone by him. And hey, maybe you'll make it onto his dumb creepy list too, who knows. Alright, I'm finished, I stayed up way too late for this... I'm tired. Cya.
Reblogs are much appreciated, it helps spread the word, thanks.
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riririnnnn · 2 months ago
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I have this foreboding feeling that while we are prepared for Sae's and Shidou's backstory, Nagi's backstory is going to sneak from behind and punch us in the gut.
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No, I don't think it's going to be straight up depression like Kaiser's, but I do think that it'll hit close to home.
You see, Nagi got Laissez-faire parents which means they never really interfered with his life. Like, these type of parents—as I have read on some websites—will basically set their child free and let them do whatever they want with no or very few rules/restrictions. They will not tell you, "Oh! You should do this!" or "Oh! You shouldn't do this!" They will simply let you figure out your life all by yourself.
I'm not an expert on this and I'm not calling this type of parenting bad in any way. Every child is different with different needs, and I'm sure there are many who grew up in this kinda family and liked this parenting method. However, I do think that Nagi didn't like it that much, and I got two reasons to think this way:
1. "That's nice."
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When Reo said that his family constantly meddles in his life, Nagi's immediate reaction was, "That's nice" instead of being surprised or disgruntled. If Nagi really liked his parents NOT meddling in his life, then he should've said something like, "Really!? Sucks to be you, Reo. I can't imagine living a life like that!"
You getting me?
Also, we all know how Nagi is—he definitely feels that telling someone to do or not to do something is a hassle, so he, probably, feels that if someone is doing all this for you, then you are important for them.
And before any one says, no, I don't think Nagi was tying up his tongue thinking, "They are his parents. They wouldn't want anything bad for their own child, right? I shouldn't say anything against them and should say good things about them just to be safe." I don't think he has this kind of filter in him.
2. "Don't die ."
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So, why would you not want someone to die? Of course, because you care for them and want them to be with you.
"Want"
That's really what I'm tryna highlight.
It's a pretty common knowledge that some children are just naturally more independent while others are a bit more dependent and seek guidance from the elders. Considering Nagi's first reaction to knowing about Reo's parents' meddling, I think that Kiddo!Nagi falls into the latter category—someone who likes to be guided and helped by the adults. Now, place Kiddo!Nagi with his Laissez-faire parents... You are getting where I'm going with this one?
That's why I think that Kiddo!Nagi, probably, thought that his parents didn't love him/care for him. And what happens if someone doesn't love you or care for you? Yeah, they don't care if you die which, somewhat, explains why Older!Nagi was happy to hear, "Don't die [before us (probably)]" from his parents.
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I have already talked about his potential backstory before too, so it was actually when I heard he had longer bangs as a child that made my head turn to him again—something felt odd.
I understand that having long bangs is not a big deal—Niko's bangs literally cover his eyes, but having it as a kid is way different, y'know. Once you are like 12-13, you somewhat become capable of doing your own hair and clothes by yourself, so you can manage whatever aesthetics you prefer. However, for a kid younger than that, it's the parents' responsibility to look after his/her hair and clothes, and we all know that long bangs are quite bothersome—blocks our vision, sometimes stabs the eyes, and even irritatingly itches the nose.
All in all, till his backstory drops, I'd firmly believe that he was, though unintentionally, a neglected kid—at least, emotionally.
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Now I can't get this image out of my head where Kiddo!Nagi is longingly staring at other kids in a park where everyone is learning things like riding a bicycle or maybe playing baseball and stuff with their parents while he is just.. there, probably, all alone.
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perotovar · 1 month ago
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my favorite things i've made 2024
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tagged by @jolapeno @almostfoxglove @morallyinept @schnarfer @iamasaddie
@kedsandtubesocks @chronically-ghosted @moonlitbirdie and @arcanefox207 ♥
alright, y'all, i can't believe this year is ending soon 🥹 as we all know, this year has had a lot of ups and downs, but i can't help but feel like pedro did when he got his sag award, y'know??
i'm so grateful for all of you, and i can't wait to see what the new year brings. new p boys, new premieres/press tours?? sounds like heaven to me ♥
now, i've been tagged to toot my own horn a little bit and i guess i can, fine :P i don't normally like to, but i've been tagged by some wonderful, lovely friends to do so
below, will be both fics and gifs i've made this year that i'm pretty proud of!
before anything, i just wanna say, i'm super fucking proud of my Offering of Frith writing challenge. y'all did such an amazing job on every single one of the fics. i worked super hard on that and it was SO fun. i'd love to do another challenge in 2025, so i may do some brainstorming ✏️👀
fics:
bloody kisses -> alright, i'm gonna be real with y'all. this is my favorite thing i've ever written. okay, maybe not ever, but it's definitely tied with itbotn. i really love how quickly and easily this universe came together for me, and the little cult following that it has makes me so happy. they've almost got a little life of their own. i really, really wanna get back to them. i've got an idea that i'd love to get down, and now that a lot of the pressures of school are a little lessened, i might make it happen soon!
into the beat of the night ch 7 - "in my side" -> this chapter didn't get as much attention as the rest of the series, and that's okay, but i'm still proud of it for stepping out of my comfort zone. it was an area i was afraid would be a little taboo (since it covers deadnaming, misgendering, and past abusive relationships) so it's a little more serious than the series tends to be. i like what it means for river and frankie's relationship and it cements how they feel about each other, y'know?
into the beat of the night ch 8 - "deeper and deeper" -> and now for something completely different lol i like this chapter because it could've only happened after the experience with river's ex. they're completely comfortable with each other now and this was the last of frankie's walls coming down. i love them ♥
gifs:
the pedro pascal fandom moodboard that i made for the friendship exchange cat and han hosted ♥ i love how that turned out because it's the exact experience i have in this fandom lol
gideon @sp00kymulderr 's birthday present ♥ i adore our little disaster bi raccoon man and i love making these silly sets like this. i also love gideon so i'm glad they were the recipient for this!
silly pedro during the gladiator 2 press ♥ again, i love making these goofier sets. they're super fun to make and the end result is always really rewarding. and maybe i just like making myself laugh LMAO
i love you guys and i hope the new year treats you all well ♥
np tags: @for-a-longlongtime @schnarfer @iero @userparamore @djo
@miwtual @tomshiddles @gasolinerainbowpuddles @mrsmando @ghostofaboy
@missredherring @cavillscurls @beardedjoel @beefrobeefcal @quinnnfabrgay
@hellishjoel @max--phillips @oonajaeadira @wethairjoel @pedgito and literally anyone that wants to/sees this! i'm sorry if you already have done this or i missed you, it wasn't on purpose 🥲
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bloggingboutburgers · 5 months ago
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this past week my qpp of almost two years broke up with me. and i know for you, you said you wouldn't necessarily feel heartbroken if your qpr came to an end, but for me, it felt more heartbreaking than some of my past romantic breakups. this whole thing made me wonder if maybe im not queerplatonic or aro enough to be in a qpr, or if id ever want to be in a qpr again. but seeing you post about your qpr gives me hope that queerplatonic love is something that i can experience fully. so thank you for always sharing your story, because that's what's helping me heal right now <3
Aah, to be perfectly honest, as much as I sorta "downplay" it compared to what it must feel for people who experience romantic attraction... I've had a time where I almost felt like I couldn't go on with my QPP as well and the sheer thought of it was really hard to bear too, so my words here aren't necessarily being very fair to the reality of things.
It was during the travel ban of March 2020 to November 2021 where citizens of my country and others weren't allowed to enter the US unless we spent 15 days in a country that wasn't banned. It made it much harder than usual to visit my partner and as it was nearing 2 years with nobody aware it was going on anymore and US people more concerned about whether they'd be able to have turkey for Thanksgiving, my hope was running really thin. So for a few days in mid-October, as I was at rock bottom, I was starting to write in passing to my partner about how maybe going on wasn't worth it because the separation was too hard on us, it wasn't showing signs of stopping, and the whole thing maybe wasn't worth the pain if they could live their life happily and not have to worry about me who couldn't visit.
And then we videocalled at some point, and when they tearfully told me that even if it did end then and there, they wanted me to keep the promise ring they'd recently given me, I suddenly felt a quiet rage in me going like "No. Fuck this. Look at them. I love them. And I love this too much to allow some cruel governmental decision to end it. If it ever ends, it'll be because WE want it to end. Not because of shit like this."
...I'm making it sound super dramatic but yeah long story short this is also a big reason why we're planning to get married. So that when the US government decides to put a ban on countries including mine again, they can't stop us from vibing together this time.
I guess... I still don't wanna 100% assume we'll be together forever because I don't wanna trap them in a situation they may no longer feel happy in. We're doing great now, but I still have it in the back of my mind that maybe someday they'll get sick of me (they say they never will and that'd be dope if they never did, but never say never and all), or we'll both just want other things, and if it ends like that, then... Yeah, that'd be alright. Much more alright than the way it almost ended.
(...Oh, and for the record, if a friendship of mine ended abruptly, or if my brothers stopped being on good terms with me, I'm pretty sure I'd be just as heartbroken, to be fair. And it'd feel like my reality was collapsing a little. I guess anything ending, any human connection ending, has that effect to a degree, if it's important enough, after all.)
Though describing things like that does make it a bit harder to define what makes it "queerplatonic" as opposed to "romantic", I still... Just have that feeling in my gut that it isn't romance, y'know? It's kinda... A mix between being close friends and being an old married couple without ever having gone through the grandiose passion-honeymoon phase. Maybe that phase IS what defines romance per se. I don't know. Maybe someday I'll find more answers, but it's kinda hard to find answers when you have no idea how romance works to begin with I guess 🙈
In any case... Sorry if I caused any confusion or if I made you question your validity. The thing is pretty simple to be honest: if you feel you're aro, you're veeeeeery likely to BE aro. Because nobody can make that call but you and nobody can name the relationships you have but you. And if amongst everything you even FOUND the words "aro" or "queerplatonic" in a world where those identities and types of relationships are so aggressively hidden or erased, then it's gotta stand for something.
...I guess at the very least THIS I can be certain of TwT Sorry I'm a bit messy about all of this myself, I'm still also going on about it trying to figure it out day by day, but I owed it to you and everyone to be honest. These things are hard to define and I hope to keep finding better and better words to do so someday. TwT
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hey-its-jacob-lol · 1 year ago
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JacobLOL and Kirb Presents: The Chaotic Route
*Our story begins in Equestria. Discord, The master and Lord of Chaos is up to his usual chaotic tricks annoying anyone and everyone all day long. He made the Apple family's orchard come to life and ran away from the farm. He made Twilight Sparkle's books fly around at such a fast speed that they all eventually knocked Rainbow Dash of the sky. He stuck Rarity's Mannequins onto the ceiling and he even covered Pinkie Pie's own home with a chocolate flood.
Anyway, eventually, the complaining eventually got so out of hand, or hoof, that Fluttershy had no other choice but to confront her friend.*
Fluttershy (rather annoyed): "Discccoord. What have you been up to?"
Discord: "Hoho! Why would you possibly want to know that Fluttershy? It's been pretty lacking, I must say."
Fluttershy: "Well, that's not what everypony else is saying. They're all coming up to me and complaining about the stuff you've done!"
Discord: *scoffs* "Like what?"
*Fluttershy then replied with all the antics that were mentioned earlier.*
Discord (awkwardly): "Ohhh right, that."
Fluttershy: "Yes. That."
Discord: "Oh, come on, Fluttershy! At least I didn't hurt anyone!"
Fluttershy: "No, you didn't directly. But you've could've cost both Rarity and Pinkie Pie their jobs! What would've happened then?"
Discord (muttering): "I wouldn't mind, I think I did worst to Applejack."
Fluttershy: "What was that?!"
Discord (realising): "Um, nothing!"
*Discord gave Fluttershy a big grin, and Fluttershy sighed.*
Fluttershy: "Look, Discord, I understand why you need to be chaotic. It's a part of your nature, and it keeps you alive."
Discord: "Why thank you for being so thoughtful, Flutter-"
Fluttershy: "HOWEVER... Surely, there's a better way for you to use your magic without getting on anyone's nerves."
Discord: "Hmpf! You think you know so much about being a Draconequus, don't you?"
Fluttershy: "I try my best, Discord. I try because I care about you and I know that you're now reformed, but don't forget, we do still have the Elements of Harmony, and even though it would give me a great amount of guilt, I'd have to seal you back into stone again if you were to ever go too far again."
*Fluttershy sighed as her eyes darted towards the ground. After a few awkward seconds, Discord eventually spoke up.*
Discord: "I think some ponies just need to accept that I'm still going to be somewhat chaotic."
Fluttershy: "That's not the point, Discord."
Discord (rather frustrated): "Then what is it then, Fluttershy?!!"
Fluttershy: "It's about me making sure you don't end up on the wrong side of things again, and it's also so you quit pestering my friends!"
Discord: "Oh, come on now, Fluttershy. You know they're used to it by now."
Fluttershy: "Well, maybe they are, but that doesn't make it any less annoying for them."
*Discord pouted.*
Discord: "You ponies are no fun sometimes."
Fluttershy: "It's not that we aren't fun, or that we don't enjoy your antics from time to time. It's just that there's a time and place for them. There's needs to be order at least at some points of the day. Y'know, like order."
Discord: "You mean the one thing I truly go against? You ponies really care about your harmony, don't you?"
Fluttershy: "I mean, it's been around our culture for so long, it's bound to."
Discord (muttering): "Right..."
*Discord lowered his head.*
Discord: "You do everything you can to fit in, and yet you still can't."
Fluttershy: "Discccoord. Don't be like that. I'm your friend and so is everyone else."
Discord: "But you don't know what it's like to be me and unless I actually turn you into a draconequus, which I don’t even know if that's possible, you'll never know."
*Discord then lifted he head, as he looked into sky.*
Discord: "That's why I enjoyed being around that jester, Jevil. He, too, was a creature of chaos. He understood me and my own struggles for freedom. Sadly, I haven't really heard much from them since I was kicked out of his little group while you and the others were fighting them."
Fluttershy: "Do you miss Jevil then?"
*Discord sighed.*
Discord: "Yes."
Fluttershy: "Well, why don't you try making up with Jevil? That could help make you feel better!"
Discord: "I suppose I could, if I really wanted to... Then again, the supposed 'Dark World' seems pretty fun too..."
*Suddenly, Discord gasped as a light bulb went off.*
Discord: "Sweet Celestia, that's it, Fluttershy!!! I know where I can go to continue being my chaotic self without interfering with the ponies duties! Oh, thank you, Fluttershy!"
*Discord hugged a rather confused Fluttershy.*
Fluttershy: "Umm... You're welcome?"
Discord: "Now, let us set forth for The Dark World!"
Fluttershy: "Wait, wha-"
*Discord, with Fluttershy in his arms, summoned a door that shun with a bright light onto the other side and with a now confident smile on his he jumped through the said, all while Fluttershy was tagging along with him.*
*Meanwhile, it was yet another day for Kris and her friends. That being a day of boring classes with Alphys and Berdly being annoying. Except for the fact that Berdly hasn't been seen at all for several days. Not that it bothered Susie or Kris, really. In fact, they couldn't really care less.*
*Anyway, everyone was pretty bored. There was nothing fun to do, and Kris, Noelle, and Susie could really only tolerate Sans for so long.* So, bored out of their minds, they decided to head to The Dark World, where our story truly begins... Once our teams switched outfits and found themselves in Castle Town, they were greeted by Lancer.*
Lancer: "Susie!"
*Lancer rode up to Susie and the others with a big smile on his face.*
@somedude111111
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alesbianperson · 1 year ago
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bully!ellie williams x fem!reader pt. 2
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summary: Ever since that project that you both worked on, shes been unreasonably mean to you and you have no idea why.
warnings: light smut (or rather just a light make out); some swearwords; very short
authors note: not proofread!; this is honestly the first time i attemted to write anything sexual so please forgive me if this is absolute shit; also sorry part 2 was taking so long, im losing motivation really quickly
part 1
--☆--
"You.. heard all that?"
You just nod quietly, your heart pumping inside your chest. Silence fell over the room, leaving you both in awkward tension. Your mind raced as you tried to say something to break the silence, but before you could think of something not totally stupid, Ellie broke it, clearing her throat awkwardly.
"Look. I didn't mean to be like that, and I know it sounds like a stupid fucking excuse, but I didn't know how else to get your attention." She looked at you, her eyes scanning yours for a reaction.
You didn't know how to respond. A million thoughts rushed through your mind, but none of them seemed to come out in words. The ability to move had, so it felt, lost you and everything suddenly felt dizzy.
"Why?" you finally got out, kinda oblivious to the obvious situation. Your question earned a confused look from Ellie. "Why? Cause I fucking like you!", she paused a moment, "Really. Like the 'i can't stop thinking about you' and 'i almost pass out when you look at me' like."
Oh.
Heat began to rise in your cheeks, and you quickly looked down to hide it. Just before you could open your mouth, Ellie, once again, did it before you. "You don't have to say anything to that, y'know? Let's just forget all that and never talk about it again."
"No," you simply answered, "cause I like the fact that you like me." You paused. "And I like you too." Ellies breath hitched, her eyes sparkling, leaning in closer. "You do?" She smirked, gaining her confidence back. "I do."
With your approval, she closed the gap between you two and started kissing you. Passionate, yet soft, not wanting to take things too far. Your hands found their way around her neck, hers on your waist. You slightly shivered at her touch, whimpering into the kiss which Ellie took as an opportunity to slip her tongue into your mouth, deepening the kiss.
As Ellie slowly moved her leg up between your legs, you gasped and removed your lips from hers. "Too much?" She asked carefully. You quickly shook your head before connecting your lips again, this time less soft, growing more needy. Quickly, Ellie had her leg between yours again, moving it slightly to cause some friction. "Fuck." You moaned into the kiss, causing Ellie to smile against your lips.
But just as she increased her speed: "What the fuck?" Ellie quickly removed her leg from between yours, turning around. Heat began crawling up your face. "Jesse!" Ellie whisper-yelled. But he just stood there, grinning. Brightly. "I hoped this would happen. But please, next time, close the door. Or better: Lock it." This made the whole situation just more embarrassing in your eyes. "As much as I'd love to let you guys.. carry on with what you were doing, the coach wants to speak to you." He continued, facing Ellie.
She shortly looked at you, flashing a smile, before heading out with Jesse, but not without saying: "We need to continue that." And a wink. At you.
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eternalwritess · 11 months ago
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I may know someone - Platonic!Alastor & tech demon!reader + Vox x tech demon!reader
Summary: Vox decides to confront whoever decided to fuck up with system. Alastor has a proposition for you that he wants you to take...
He couldn't reverse the damage. He knew that by now. He's tried a multitude of things only to get shocked many times. He's even tried screaming at the monitor. Which caused Velvette to scream back at him even louder.
But he had footage he had footage of a demon flicking something causing his computers to work to her liking. It was impressive he would've even offered her a deal. Would've being the key word, they still fucked up his system.
But now he had their face, he could find them. Oh and find them he would.
˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙
You're not an idiot.
At least you like to consider the fact that you're not. You're powerful, but maybe you should've thought this last one through. After the whole almost getting caught thing Alastor has been visiting you a lot more frequently. A lot more cheerful too.
He's been all up in your space more than usual, and thats saying something. Touching your stuff even though he doesn't even like tech all that much. He only tolerates yours because it just makes old tech better, but not too modern.
He tapped on one of your phones and looked over to you. "Y/n dear, I've been thinking," He hummed his fingers tapping along the glass. "And really you should consider it," He smiled and walked over to you placing a hand on your shoulder.
"Have you ever considered becoming an overlord?"
You scoffed and looked over to him. "Didn't we talk about this last time? Y'know," you flicked of bit of light over to a breaker causing it to crackle before the room lit up. "Before you almost got me killed?"
Alastor laughed and patted your head. "Oh past is past dear. You need to think of the now!"
You couldn't help but scoff. "That's an awfully ironic line coming from you," You looked at his staff and then back to him.
"Well I am thinking of the now, and radio is always better! But enough about that. You should really consider it. Y'know you technically are one already. Don't you own a few souls?" He titled his head with his eyes becoming dials. Slowly. Ticking. Away.
He sat his head to its regular position and smiled.\
"A few I have like one of two, that doesn't count,"
"One or two wouldn't be the word I'd use to describe such my dear," he leaned on your shoulder and grinned. "Besides you got this whole side of the pentagram under your claws," he tapped the desk with an ever growing grin.
"I don't have enough power-"
"Pardon my interruption darling but I do believe that is what you would call... baloney," He grabbed your shoulders and now spun you around to face him. "You should really think about this offer y/n after all I'm just trying to help you get your name up there-"
You stepped back and looked at him. "I don't want my name up there-"
"Once again-, pardon, but I do believe that it would be good. I've even spoken to Rosie about such,"
You paused for a moment before shaking your head. You couldn't do this, why would he want you to become an overlord? "Why?" you asked. "Why do you want this? Is it to show someone up?"
Alastor laughed before giving you a pat. "Oh you know me too well, but no,"
You scoffed. This was a petty rivalry, you could feel it. "Rosie doesn't like it when you lie," You said titling your head towards him. "Is this about that Vox guy?" You asked. You hoped not but knowing him... you didn't want to get invovled.
Alastor sighed keeping the smile. "You know me too well," he said, this time slightly strained.
"Al I can't just show up-"
"Sure you can! Don't worry my dear, Rosie and I will help you every step of the way," He turned around and dusted off his shoulders. "I ought to get going though darling, consider it!" He added as he walked out the door.
You paused sitting down on your chair. You were utterly fucked.
˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙
Vox groaned looking around. Usually he didn't parade around like such but this was a special case. He just didn't know why it had to be in this part of the pentagram. It was were practically all of the insane people resided in Hell. He watched as demons shouted and as one ate its own hand giggling and laughing.
It was disgusting. He walked around further till he came to a small building that was surprisingly in good shape. He grinned, this was it.
He walked right up to the door watching as the electricity around him responded to his presence, zipping around and disappearing. It was odd to see something reacting to his presence the way the electricity was. He stepped back for a moment as it flickered across his feet and under the door. He sighed looking at the building.
Just. One. Knock.
˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙
You tapped your feet on the ground before stopping. Consider it, what was there to consider? Truly. You weren't an overlord although in some cases Alastor would be more than happy to call you one. You owned souls, sure, but you didn't even have half the numbers of some of the people on there.
Yet here you were wondering what it all meant. You knew Alastor and you know what he's like. He adores the spotlight almost as much as he adores radio, having a friend like you up there just because he suggested it would paint the spotlight on you both. You have to admit, he's clever but he's rash in such a thought. The blacklash, it would show that he's powerful yes, but at what cost?
But he's thought this through, he doesn't make rash decisions, he wants to show Vox up, and he needs a statement. The fight with the angels show'd him losing, if anyone saw that he would need to show that he was still in power. Since he needs to do that who better to bring up on his own accord than you?
You were already powerful, you were a tech demon for crying out loud, and you were his friend. You already messed with Vox and his tech. You already showed that you're a force. You'd be the perfect subject to bring up. To show that he wasn't just old news.
You grit your teeth and ran your hand through your hair. If you said no? It wouldn't go well, Alastor already offered you power last time, he could also take away some of your power if he wanted. He could make the place you lived worse, although you doubted he would it. It didn't mean it wasn't exactly off the table.
Rosie wanted you up there too, she's been there for a while, she's been in hell for a while. You taking up this offer could be good, but it could be bad. You just showing up, that would piss people off, put a target on your back. Alastor and Rosie would help you but you doubted that they would care too much if you got into a scuffle with another overlord. Alastor did just prove that and-
Knock.
You paused for a moment looking at the door. Everyone on this side knew that you were closed by now, it was dark out. You were practically out. You stood up. It's probably just a new sinner. Is what you told yourself before sitting back down. Your hand pressing against your forehead in annoyance.
"We're closed," We're was a strong word, there's no one here but you after all. The words came out a little stronger than you would've liked but fuck it, this is hell.
Another knock. You set your hand down and sighed looking at the electricity around you crinkle. "We're closed you deaf or something fucker?" You turned around back to the door and sighed. Whoever this was better leave or else you're gonna take out some anger on them.
The door opened. You grit your teeth and stood up turning around. "Are you deaf-" Your words fell short of your mouth as you stared at the person in front of you. Fuck. You were utterly fucked.
Vox. Vox, the CEO of Voxtech was at your door. The man who you just fucked over with Alastor. This couldn't be a coincidence, or a friendly stop by for that matter.
You stood there for probably half a second before regaining composer. You straightened your back and sighed mentally this time. Alastor taught you three things after all.
Always keep a smile.
You smiled at him and although it was strained you could tell it pissed him off, maybe not the best for you but it did assure that you were in control that being whatever meager control you had over a real overlord.
"Hello, Vox from Voxtech I'm sure you've heard of me!" Vox smiled sticking out his hand for you to shake but you continued to smile and dipped your head instead.
"Y/n," You said in reply.
"Ah, well thats great to know. After all I finally get to put a name to the face I've been seeing all around my building lately," You tried to ignore the hollow tv like sound that came out of his mouth with each word. You. Were. Fucked.
You nodded picking at your nails your eyes glancing down at them. You are not looking him in the eyes. "Yes well I was doing a favor for an old friend of mine-"
"Alastor, correct?" He asked he grabbed your hand and forced you closer causing you to look up at him.
You stepped back and rubbed your hand with a glare painted onto his screen. "Yes, Alastor, we've known each other for a while now. Why? Jealous?" You chuckled and tilted your head feeling everything around you respond to where you were.
Vox rolled his eyes and grabbed your again this time, harsher. "Listen here, I don't know who you think you are but let me remind you something," You felt his hands pierce through your skin when you tried to move back. "You aren't anything," You watched as the blue electricity circled around you.
You looked around the room in half panic careful not to drop your smile although you doubt you were smiling much now, it hurt. Your hand hurt like he was fucking dissecting it.
2. Remind them where they are.
You paused for a moment and looked up laughing. With your other hand you flicked your wrist and smiled at him. The room responded to your without a second of hesitation. The lights flickered and the cables and chords lifted up in response wrapping around Vox's legs and pulling him down.
His hand scratched yours tearing it up badly, but it could be fixed. You needed to deal with this now. Vox hissed attempting to get up and free himself of the thick cables that wrapped around his hands. You rubbed your hand unconsciously and looked at him.
"Listen here," You mocked titling your head. You snapped your fingers and felt the lights burn hotter than before and onto Vox watching him panic over the sudden overload. "You aren't in your fancy studio anymore sweetheart," You felt the energy around your creeping into your skin making yourself bigger and more of a shadow than before.
"You're in my house," You grabbed his collar and bent down pressing him close to you. "Now get out," You demanded.
3. Always make them leave on your accord.
You shoved him back and watched as the cables tossed him out of the door and slammed it shut in his face. It might've hit him actually, well that wasn't your problem anymore now was it.
You groaned sitting down in your chair. Your head head like hell, worse than it actually, funny. You rubbed your head and sighed feeling the dull thump slowly trace itself around your body before fading. The energy around you was gone now. You wondered if Alastor ever felt like this after going 'full demon' or whatever the hell this was called. Then you remembered, of course he wouldn't. He wouldn't need to use all of his power, you on the other hand did.
You muttered a curse under your lips. You were a target now. You had no other choice but to accept Alastor's offer, he might help you. He would. He would help you before but now that you'd be more official partners with him he'd be more than glad to do so.
You slowly felt the world fade around you as you leaned on your desk and groaned.
Everything hurt.
˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙
Vox scrambled back up to his feet in shock. He felt weak. You took energy from him, how the fuck did you do that? He bared his teeth for a moment before stopping and dusting off his suit. If anyone saw that, he'd never hear the end of it.
You defeated him, you took control. It took a while for him to notice that he was weaker, but he was. He stood outside of your door for a few moments glad that he couldn't speak, he couldn't even think right.
That type of power was breathtaking in a way. He shook his head and walked off not wanting to risk another confrontation, he didn't know if he'd survive another.
Previous <---...--->
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kaija-rayne-author · 1 month ago
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DAV is maximized (made for?) Tank/Warrior players
Curiosity is absolutely one of my fatal flaws. I was sorta feeling shitty about the whole 'you probably just suck at the fighting system in DAV' thing.
Let me preface this with saying that I'm good with rogues. It's my usual playstyle and I almost always do a first run of any RPG as a rogue.
What I'm really not all that good at? Tanks. Pretty much any other class I'm at least suitably competent with. I mean, I can tank, but it's just not something I'm more than acceptably good at. I also have very little experience with them. I think I've tanked in 3 games? Out of the, it must be hundreds, of games I've played? I just don't prefer to tank. I'm a rogue/mage/healer style player. The one who backs up the tank or keeps them on their feet, y'know?
So, because curiosity will likely be the death of me at some point, and despite never wanting to touch it again, I made a warrior character in DAV. I just... had to know if it was me or the game. I suppose I enjoy actually being a good gamer more than I suspected. DAV offended my pride, perhaps. Self-awareness isn't comfortable.
That fighting system, that I had so much trouble with as a rogue (with other rogues and a mage as backup since we don't get our tank companions til later in act one) has, so far, been so fucking easy as a warrior I'm actually thinking of increasing the difficulty level.
DAV is just maximized for warrior players and people who like to bash barrels in, not any other class. Which is just shitty game design.
I suppose I should have seen it before. The rest of the companions you start with are all support characters. Two rogues and a mage. Your first companion you aquire is Bellara, also a rogue. Oops. Mage. Bellara is a mage. I forgor.
I dunno, I'm going to run this character until I get to the spot (when Harding receives her special ability) where I first wanted to rage quit as a rogue. But so far? I haven't died once. I'd gotten creamed numerous times as a rogue character by this spot in the game. I can go toe to fucking toe with a fucking ogre! And only have to heal once!
It's truly ridiculous. I'll test out mage after, if I can find the patience. It's reasonably unlikely that I'll actually decide to finish this run. Unless I do it for writing my fix it fic reasons . But I can kinda see more clearly why some people actually liked it. It's actually almost fun as a tank.
I did also say I'd never touch DAV again too, though, soooooo.
If you turn your brain completely off, don't give a shit about the Lore, and if the story is a back seat sort of thing for you as a gamer, this might actually be somewhat fun. It's not Dragon Age regardless, they screwed the pooch to sell the pups on that one. (I'm a Lore fiend, story and character first player. I legitimately don't give a shit about the fighting in RPGs. It's a back seat thing for me. As long as I can make it work, I'm good.)
SMDH
I said DAV was wickedly unbalanced in my review series, but I didn’t think it was so bad that they... just didn't bother to make it a fun game for rogue players. Despite them getting rid of half of what makes playing a rogue fun (sneaking, hiding in shadows, picking fucking locks, y'know, rogue stuff.) Not sure about mages yet. I do want to try one just out of pissed off, irritated curiosity, though.
Snorts. They made this game for warrior players. And I can't honestly find words to describe how shitty that is. It lacks most of the stuff that makes any RPG an actual RPG. It's maximized for warriors and people who like to destroy barrels. (Why. Why the fucking barrels?) Rogues are nothing but light skirmishers. I'll have to actually play a mage and see, but I've talked to people who said it's easy as a mage, too.
WTAF does BioWare have against rogue players to nerf the class so badly?
I'm honestly floored by how easy this game is as a warrior. I'll even test it out on max difficulty, (which is usually what I play at, max or one down).
But the shittiness of designing a game mostly for tank players can't be ignored. I changed nothing but the class. And I'm not far enough into the game yet for build to matter that much. I think I've gotten roughly 5 skill points to put into my character.
No wonder they denied game keys to honest reviewers.
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comically-callous · 1 year ago
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Can you do a story were you date Sirius so he can actually Date Remus and reg don't know and likes you and gets jealous
If you can thx you <3
I didn't think I'd like writing this as much as I did lol.
Regulus Black x Fem!Reader
Some Warnings: Technically a modern AU, a bit of cursing, mentions of a bad home life, jealous Reg, sort of angsty???
A/n: I made this new Year's themed even though new years has passed 🤗 Cause y'all can't stop me 🤬🤬🤬 This is DEFINITELY my longest fic yet. PLEASE DON'T LET IT FLOP GUYS.... My requests are open btw
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Ah, winter break. It was something everyone at Hogwarts looked forward to. Well, almost everyone. There were those who didn't get to go home to their families and some who wished they didn't have to go home to their families.
One of those people was a friend of yours, Sirius Black. He often avoided talking about his home life, but you knew it wasn't good. And you knew going home for the holidays could be hard for him. So, when it was the day before winter break and the two of you had a moment alone, you asked if there was anything you could do to make the break easier for him.
"I need you to be my girlfriend."
Seven words you'd never expected to hear from your best friend. Your best friend who was in a gay relationship, nonetheless.
"What?" You asked in bewilderment. "No!"
"Wait, wait, wait. It's not what you think." Sirius put his hands up as if to show his innocence. "I don't really want you to be my girlfriend. I just need you to pretend. Please."
"Why?!"
"Because," he explained. "My parents have started to get... Suspicious about my total lack of any girlfriend. And I may have told them that I was dating you.... Y'know, to throw them off my track..."
You stared at him. "You told your parents we were dating?!" You repeated, clearly upset at him.
"I know, I know. It was a shitty thing to do, and I'm sorry." He says. "But, if I didn't give them some sort of excuse, they might've found out about me and Remus!"
You were still upset, but you could understand why he did what he did. "So..." You crossed your arms. "You said I need to pretend to date you. What is it exactly that you need me to do?"
"Over the break, I need you to come over for a couple days. My parents will meet you, get to know you, blah, blah, blah. And then, you'll never have to speak with them again. If they ask about you after that, I'll say we broke up."
You really weren't a fan of having to fake date your best friend. You also weren't a fan of having to meet his parents who you'd only heard negative things about. But... You knew how happy he was with Remus and you would hate for his parents to find out about the two. You sighed. "You're lucky we're friends."
"Is that an agreement?" He asked, a grateful smile on his face.
"Yes. But, you'll be forever in debt to me."
"Fine by me."
The next day, while on the train to 9 3/4, you and Sirius mostly just planned for you having to meet his parents. You decided that you'd arrive the day after Christmas, stay for news years eve, and leave new Year's Day.
A lot of the train ride was spent establishing some basic facts about your "relationship". How you'd met, your first date, what your wedding would be like (which was strange, but Sirius assured you that his parents would ask about marriage), and some other details.
Soon enough, the train ride was over. Your winter break was fine. You enjoyed getting to see your family, but you were quite stressed about seeing Sirius' family. Part of you wanted to call the whole thing off, but you knew that was out of the question. You had to do this. For Sirius.
The morning of December 26th was a cold one. You wished you'd had more protection against the cold, but the formal attire you were wearing could only do so much. Sirius had told you to bring nice, formal clothing for the few days you'd be there. You were a bit worried you'd still be underdressed, though.
You took a deep breath and knocked on the door to the literal mansion that Sirius lived in.
After a few moments, the door opened. Regulus black stood on the other side.
Oh.
"Hi." You greeted, trying to politely smile at him. He didn't return the gesture. He did the opposite he gave you a look of... Annoyance?
"You're here for Sirius."
You couldn't tell if it was a question or a statement, so you just gave a nod.
He stepped aside to let you in, his eyes trailing over your attire, making you feel nervous. "He's in the living room with mother and father." Regulus said before walking off.
What a strange interaction. You and Regulus weren't close, by any means. But, you never thought he disliked you. You thought the opposite was true. Whenever the two of you did interact, he was always quite nice.
You tried to shrug off the interaction, but you just couldn't. Even when you were next to Sirius, meeting his parents for the first time, the way he'd acted toward you was on your mind.
The worst part of your day was dinner. You were worried about everything. How you were eating, how you were sitting, the way everyone was looking at you, the way Regulus was looking at you.
"Y/n," You were broken out of your thoughts by Walburga's authoritative voice. "I want to know how you and Sirius began seeing each other."
You nervously glanced over to Sirius who gave you a forced looking smile. You looked back to Walburga. Gods, she scared you. "Well, it wasn't too long ago." You said, trying your hardest not to break eye contact with her. "It was late September. He told me since we'd known each other for so long, he thought we'd be a good match."
Sirius nodded along. "We went on a couple dates, turns out we really like each other." He said.
You glanced over to Regulus. He was glaring at you. You didn't break eye contact and after a moment something else flashed through his eyes. Something softer. Sadness?
"So," Walburga broke your attention away from Regulus as you looked back to her. "Are you serious about your relationship with my son?"
"Very." You replied.
"Do the two of you plan on marrying?"
You swallowed. "As soon as possible."
You heard silverware clatter as Regulus abruptly stood up. "I need to be excused." He said lowly.
Walburga raised an eyebrow. "You've hardly eaten." She stated. There wasn't any concern in her voice like you'd expect. It was a blatant statement.
"I know." He says. "I'm done."
His mother gave him a disapproving look, but didn't object.
Regulus stormed out of the room. You couldn't help but frown as you watched him leave.
The next few days were a bit uneventful. Most of your time was either spent in the guest bedroom you were staying in, or talking with Sirius. You were still confused by Regulus' attitude toward you. You knew his and Sirius' relationship was a rocky one. But, you didn't think that affected what he thought of you. He'd known you and Sirius were friends, and he still treated you kindly. But, now that the two of you were pretending to date, he had a problem with it? It didn't make any sense!
It was December 31st now. You and Sirius were sitting in his room, eating lunch while sitting on the floor.
"I was thinking-"
"Oh, God."
"Shut up, let me finish." Sirius chuckled, playfully hitting your arm. "I was thinking about going to a party tonight."
You furrowed your brows. "Where?"
"James and his family have a new years party every year. I'm sure they wouldn't mind some extra company."
You thought about it. Honestly, you weren't really in the mood for a party. Plus, if his parents caught you sneaking out, your heart would probably stop. "I think I'll sit this one out." You said after a moment.
"You sure?"
You gave a nod. "Yeah, I'd rather stay in. I'm sure you'll have plenty of fun without me."
"Oh, I will."
You smacked his arm.
The clock read 11:39. You were alone in your guest room sitting in your bed. You had your laptop open in front of you as you watched a broadcasting of one of the many new Year's events that were going on tonight. You were absentmindedly looking at the crowded city streets displayed on your screen when-
"I wouldn't be using that while having the door open." Regulus said. He stood in the doorway, arms crossed, looking from you, to the laptop, and then back to you.
"Why not?" You asked.
"My mother doesn't approve of us using muggle technology." He said. "And I doubt she'd be okay with her son's girlfriend using it."
You sighed. "Right... Girlfriend."
Regulus raised a brow at how you'd said that. "What are you watching, anyway?" He stepped into the room, closing the door behind him.
"A new Year's parade."
"... Could I join you?"
You were surprised at that. After how cold he'd been acting toward you over the past few days, you'd assumed the last thing he'd want to do tonight is spend time with you. But, you weren't against the idea of not being alone when the new Year started.
"Sure." You replied as you moved over on the bed to make room for him to sit.
The two of you watched the parade in silence for a few minutes until Regulus spoke. "How come I had no idea you and Sirius were dating?" He asked.
You glanced over at him. "What do you mean?"
"You said the two of you had been together since late September." He said. "How come nobody knew about it?"
You subconsciously began to fiddle with the fabric of your shirt. "I don't know." You shrugged. "Guess we weren't shouting about it from the rooftops."
Regulus didn't break his gaze away from you. After a pause, he spoke. "I never would've guessed you liked him in that way."
You didn't know how to reply to that, so you just shrugged again.
Regulus was still looking at you, even though your gaze was focused on the screen in front of you.
He paused. "What made you fall for him?" He asked.
You thought it was an odd question. When you turned to look at him, he looked sort of sad. "He..." You trailed off.
Regulus looked at you expectantly. You were trying to come up with something, but your mind was blank.
"You do like him don't you?"
You looked away nervously. You began to wonder whether or not he'd even care that your relationship with Sirius was fake. If he really was upset about you dating Sirius, then wouldn't he like to know that it was all just pretend?
"Y/n." He said your name and you were pulled away from your thoughts.
"He's not actually my boyfriend." You blurted out.
Regulus paused. "What?"
"He asked me to pretend to be his girlfriend. He didn't want Walburga finding out about his actual relationship, so-"
"It's all fake?" He asked.
"All of it."
"You don't like him?"
"Not like that."
You swore you saw a sliver of a smile creep on to his face. "That's... Good."
You tilted your head. "Is it?"
"I mean..." He shrugged. "I just... I guess thinking you'd gotten with my brother was making me upset." He said.
"Why?"
"Because..." He hesitated. "I like you, Y/n."
You felt your heart skip a beat. Fuck, that actually explained a lot. You couldn't believe you hadn't realized sooner. You felt your face heat up. "Seriously?"
"Yeah." He sighed. "I was jealous. That's why I was acting so... Weird. Sorry for being such an asshole to you."
"That's alright." You paused. "Why didn't you tell me sooner? About your feelings, I mean."
He shrugged. "I didn't think you'd feel the same."
Honestly, you'd always found Regulus quite attractive. But, you figured there was no way he'd ever like you back, so you let go of that silly crush a while ago. But, this? This was making all of those feelings wash over you again.
It was 11:59 now. You could hear the commentators of the parade excitedly get ready for the countdown.
"I feel the same." You said, watching as a blush creeped on to his cheeks.
"Really?"
"Really."
His eyes seemed to sparkle at your admission. "I..."
You heard the countdown to the new Year begin.
"Can I kiss you?" Regulus asked softly. You nodded.
"Five!"
He leaned closer.
"Four!"
Your tongue darted out to wet your lips.
"Three!"
His hands came up to cup your cheeks.
"Two!"
He closed his eyes. You closed yours.
"One!"
Your lips met in a soft, romantic kiss. He brushed some hair out of your face and Gods, his hands were soft. You couldn't believe you'd ever managed to stop liking him.
When you pulled away he sighed contently as if that kiss was all he'd been needing his entire life.
You whispered something to him before pulling him in for another kiss.
"Happy new year."
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vioartemis · 2 years ago
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Scared to lose you
(Emma Myers x fem! reader)
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Summary: Emma and you are dating, but you play Wednesday's love interest in the series, and your girlfriend doesn't enjoy it Warnings: so short it can't even be called a one shot 💀 (sorry, I ran out of inspiration for that one) (English isn't my first language, I'm sorry if there are mistakes or if something doesn't make sense TvT)
Emma and you had known each other since high school, and you started dating just a bit more than a year ago. You didn't even tried to keep your relationship secret; neither of you was famous enough to have paparazzis behind you, and you liked it like that.
You had wondered what it would be like to work together, imagining all kind of scenarios, but didn't actually thought it would happen. And here you were, both hired to play a role in the Wednesday series.
And Emma wasn't liking it. At all.
It wasn't working with you that bothered her, absolutely not. It was the fact that she had to watch you kiss another girl. A beautiful girl. She couldn't deny it.
She tried to rationalize: you played Wednesday's love interest, so the chances that there would be a lot of kisses were low. And she was right, you had only one kiss scene.
And she was fine with it; she knew it was for work, and it was just one kiss.
At least that's what she was thinking before seeing you kissing Jenna almost 10 times, as you couldn't seem to get the scene right. There was always something that 'you didn't do right'.
And your girlfriend was starting to get really pissed. And jealous. And hurt.
"Okay, let's take a break, it's not working. Both of you, get some fresh air, eat something, I don't know, distract yourselves, and in 15 minutes we'll try again" the director told Jenna and you
You both nodded, and stretched, before parting ways. You went to your girlfriend, who was clearly not doing okay.
"Hey babe, is everything okay...?" you asked as you got closer to her
"Yeah, it's just... hard, to see you kiss someone else..." Emma said, looking down, as if ashamed to feel that way
"I'm sorry, I thought we'd get it right the first time, I don't know what happened..."
There was a moment of silence, before she finally talked.
"... Maybe she just wants to kiss you over and over again..."
You looked at her in disbelief, not expecting her to say that about your costar.
"What? No, of course not. She knows we're dating, everyone knows. I don't think she'd be the type to do that"
Emma sighed. She knew you were right.
"I- I know, I'm sorry, it's just... I'm just... scared..."
"Scared? Of what?"
"... Scared to lose you... I mean look at me, and look at her... She's so much prettier that me, she has it all, and I'm just... me... I guess I'm just scared you would leave me for someone better..."
"Hey... don't say that..." you took her hands in yours "I don't care about others, okay? I love you, Emma Myers. You're the sweetest, nicest, funniest, prettiest, most perfect girl I've ever met" you said, smiling "And you're a way better kisser than her" you added jokingly
You attempt to lighten up the mood seemed to work, Emma chuckled, giving your hands a soft squeeze.
"Thank you, for reassuring me... I'm sorry, I'm just... really insecure, and I don't want to lose you..."
"It's okay to be insecure, don't apologize babe... Plus I'd gladly show you how much I love you" you smiled
"Oh yeah? And... how do you plan on doing that?"
"I'd shower you with kisses, cuddle you all night... Y'know, that kind of things..."
To emphasize your words, you cupped her cheeks, and started kissing her face; her cheeks, her forehead, her nose, and finally her lips. All that while Emma was giggling, her hands resting on your waist.
"Mm... I think you will have to do more to fully reassure me" she said playfuly
"Of course, my love... Just wait until we're alone, and I'll give you all the attention you need"
You both smiled, as you rested your forehead on hers.
"Hey lovebirds! Sorry to disturb you, but we need to get back to work" Jenna interrupted you, slight smirk on her face
"Oh, yeah, sorry. I'm coming" you told her, before turning back to Emma "I promise I'll try to be quick"
She smiled and kissed you softly.
"It's okay, take your time"
You nodded, and started to walk to the set again, when you heard Emma's voice again:
"Try not to enjoy the kiss too much!"
"I won't!" you replied with a smile, rolling your eyes
At that moment you were only sure of one thing: you would have to make up for these kisses this very night.
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official-megumin · 1 year ago
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there is always this discourse about if transfem and transmascs have it worse
And like, I know it's not really quantifiable and measureable to find the objective suckiness of being trans.
But like
Man it's gotta suck to be a trans guy. This is coming from the perspective of a trans girl btw.
I know that not all transmascs care about passing and having a "fully male body", like everyone decides for themselves what they wanna do. But let's see this from the perspective from a trans guy who wants to be as close to a cis perisex man as possible, this guy is also perisex afab, meaning normal development and stuff.
Ok, so for this man to "finish" his transition, he would need like, what? 3 surgeries. All of which are gatekept. He would need top surgery, tit chop as you say.
This is already a lot, and it sucks fucking dick that y'all have to wait for that. But other than that already sucky and gatekept surgery, we also have phalloplastry, which many countries including Denmark, doesn't offer at all because it's more complicated than vaginoplastry.
This is also a hugely impactful surgery, and I assume that for many trans men, it also doesn't really feel good enough because no semen and dick pump. Of course I'm no expert, so don't take what I say as gospel, I might flat out be wrong about many things.
But that still isn't it. By now we have moved past surgeries the average transfem would "need"
Like yes, many trans women end up getting BA and FFS to combat dysphoria on top of bottom surgery, but they aren't "required" in the same way. So let's round it out and say one half of both of those surgeries count, so that means that transfems on average get two gender affirming surgeries. Which means that now, transfem and transmasc surgery counts are the same.
But wait, there's more!
There are also hysterectomies to remove the uterus and ovaries. Which again is very extremely gatekept because "devine femininity"(bleugh)
That's three surgeries to transition "normally" for a transmasc versus the two of a transfem, already there it's more sucky.
Of course this is not taking other typically gendered features into account like hip and shoulder width, which is too variable to really take into account here. Also it is not as widely different between the sexes as some people claim.
But this is just the surgery front.
I can't even begin to imagine how dysphoria inducing dealing with menstruation must be to a trans man.
Like periods suck dick, I know that from personal exprience. It hurts like shit for like a week at a time and there's blood everywhere.
But for trans men you add fucking dysphoria on top of that???? Hellish, the female reproductive system is so invasive and intrusive. For transfems we can just y'know, not touch the thingy and we won't have to worry about a visceral bloody reminder every month that stays even after hrt starts.
Really what I want to say is that yea sure maybe transfems struggle more with sexism and such whilst transitioning, I'd argue even that is not quantifiable and will be hugely variable on how the individual looks(speaking from experience as a trans girl who has not once had transphobia aimed at her in person in public from strangers)
But the physical struggle of transitioning? I think that trans masculine transitions take the cake by far here. Like objectively too.
And all the transmascs out there at all, doesn't matter how dysphoric you are, or how far you wanna take your transition. I respect you so god damn much, and I'm in awe of all of you. You're genuinely incredible
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petrssecrethideout · 9 months ago
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"Alright everyone we are back! And y'know what, instead of trying to do more of an intro, I'm just gonna leave it to you Dale."
"What? Why?"
"...you're kidding right? It's December second there's no way you're not gonna spend the whole podcast talking about cu-"
"OHHHHH YEAH! I almost forgot. Thanks for reminding me. Well folks, the cum drum challenge is finally over, and I... well I have some bad news. I didn't fill a whole barrel."
"What?"
"Yeah dude I'm really bummed about it, I feel like i let a whole bunch of people down and--SIKE! I ACTUALLY FILLED TWO!"
"Oh my god, you--"
"Hahaaaaah, I got you there didn't I? You were so worried!, but don't worry y'all, when Dale says he's going to deliver, he fucking DELIVERS!"
"So how the fuck did you manage that?"
"Ok so you know how i said I had to cum 10 times a day to make my goal, well 10 quickly turned into 14, then 23, then 34, and after that I lost count because I got this machine from a friend that jerked me off while I was sleeping, so even after I was cumming 34 times a day there was more after that."
"Jesus Christ dude, that's crazy."
"I know, I was in this constant horny haze, it felt so good, like outside of the podcast all I was doing was lifting, eating and jerkin it! Kind of felt like a vacation honestly."
"How did it affect your gains?"
"Get this: I gained 20 pounds of muscle in a month."
"NO FUCKING WAY!"
"i KNOW RIGHT! And like, I'm fucking huge so every pound at this point is an uphill battle, so, like 20!? its crazy."
"Fuck, man."
"And I'm not the only one either, I got some dms about guys who also took the challenge, and dude holy shit look at this."
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"Who is that!?"
"That is.. well I'm not gonna give out full names but Douglas from North Carolina, who was a former bodybuilder, kinda got out of it, tried out the challenge, and gained.... you're not ready for this: 134 pounds in one month."
"That--there's no way that isn't possible."
"I'm telling you dude, I thought it was fake, but he's been posting on Instagram every day and its not only real, but its SO fucking hot. He said something about competing again and, dude PLEASE. I would love to flex on stage with you."
"Ok stop trying to flirt with the fans."
"Hey, we just proved that cumming as much as possible makes me get fucking huge, I think we should let me be as horny as I want now."
"Okay, fine I guess I can't argue with that anymore, but how are you feeling now?"
"My balls hurt."
"Really?"
"Yeah, I think its like the lack of stimulation. Honestly I might have to up my rates a bit. Oh, also that reminds me I have a business idea for you. You know how those people did the bathwater thing? Well I was thinking we could maybe sel--"
"No. Absolutely not. That's probably illegal."
"Ok but if it isn't can we do it? I know I'd be able to keep up with demand, and once I add a jerking off schedule to your workout plan you'd definitely be able to help"
"MY WHAT SCHEDULE??"
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bunnakit · 8 months ago
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my stand in ep 4 thoughts, feelings, etc
WOW WA WE WAA THAT SURE WAS AN EPISODE HUH - happy to report i went back through the episode slowly this week and took notes and really tried to gather everything i wanted to say (but i will inevitably forget something)
🌸 ok disclaimers because i have a lot of them for this particular episode 🌸
i'm just a silly guy on the internet, i'm not an expert in mental health, psychology, body language, whatever. most days i can't even take care of myself. i'm just saying things recreationally.
PLEASE do not put novel spoilers in my replies, reblogs, or tags without a warning notice. i've got an itchy blocking finger for it these days.
i am treating ming and joe and everyone involved in this show as if they were real life human beings. ming was not born some mustache twirling villain sent from hell to make joe miserable. joe is not some pure angel descended from the clouds to do no wrong. everyone in this show exhibits very human behavior and that can be distressing under certain circumstances. i'm just going to comment on them as humans. i'm not interested in a round table discussion on why a character is irredeemable, the scum of the earth, etc. i'm just putting my thoughts out there and you can take them or leave them.
🌸 alright yucky disclaimer time over 🌸
the episode really just picks us back up where everything left off - and yet joe still made ming breakfast, and ming isn't stupid (well right now at least,) he knows something is off.
i am confused why tong needs to get married on this specific day. and like bro how fast are you getting married? relax. the whole thing is just unstoppable force (trajectory of this producers career) meets immovable object (tong's fuckass stubbornness) and the collateral damage is massive.
and then there's the question of did joe ever want to play a lead? or did he let his impulsiveness and hurt put a target on his back? (only emphasized by the fact that everyone assumed joe would turn down the role)
i DO apologize for all my doubt surrounding wut. he, ja, and may are the only people in this show with any god damn sense. maybe jojo and yim. we'll see.
getting into the confrontation at joe's work, i really don't think it's that surprising when we keep in mind ming genuinely has no fucking clue what is going on. all he knows is joe woke up, was acting weird, didn't come home, and then told him to pack up his shit and leave with ZERO explanation. like, joe's completely in the right, but i'd also be confused as fuck. (i wouldn't go to someone's work about it but, y'know, we know ming acts in extremes.)
and to me this is where it really became obvious that joe has always been able to overpower ming, to get away from him, as we have seen joe's physical prowess, we've seen what he's capable of, but he never uses his body to move ming away from him - that's not who joe is, he's not someone that would put his hands on another person like that. it's just another way ming and joe are the direct antithesis of each other.
it's my thought that the argument escalates because ming is used to getting everything he wants - except for tong, and now joe. when joe begins to push him away and deny him his substitution for tong i think ming lashes out in his hurt with a thought of "it's happening again, why doesn't anyone want me?"
i will say while i do believe sol has good intentions for the most part his white knighting is getting a little irksome. while convenient, it just shows how much he's still hovering and laying in wait for a chance with joe - he, too, is not respecting joe's wishes. no is a complete sentence, sol.
and then things continue back at home and joe finally, finally throws ming's words back at him: if i'm so terrible to be with, if you're so great, why are you wasting your time with me?
and ming doesn't have an answer. what ming DOES have is another back embrace, arms wrapped around joe as he asks "don't you love me anymore?" but is he asking joe or tong?
"although i'm not as good as tong" even now joe's rampant self worth issues are still at play but at least he finally knows he's worth more than whatever this is.
then the phone rings and to me, ming looks skittish. he looks shaken. he's never seen joe so angry and he's scared and as the call progresses that fear morphs into rage when sol calls joe. and the thing is, regardless of who played the main role, ming was never going to be happy. it was either going to be joe or tong playing opposite sol and neither of those things would have been acceptable.
and then i said, out loud, in my quiet office: OH! and promptly lost my shit in the group chat.
ming doesn't look wholly present after his act of violence. his face is vacant, like he isn't completely seeing or grasping what he's just done. i get the impression that ming isn't mentally well; stress and fear and anger have a way of making people do really fucking stupid things and as these things happen you risk falling into the sunk cost fallacy - you've already gone this far, you can't stop now - which all aligns with the obsessive behavior we've seen from ming in the past.
as joe wakes up and they talk once again joe doesn't blame ming, he blames himself for not seeing the writing on the walls even though it was written in invisible ink.
"all these times we were together did you ever love me?"
"you can't tell?"
again, so much of the blame and emotional responsibility of their situationship is put on joe and ming refuses to communicate any of his feelings, perhaps because he doesn't know how to after repressing everything for so long.
WE DIDN'T GET HOT KINKY CHAINED UP SEX THOUGH, WHY DOES GOD HATE ME SPECIFICALLY
but the way joe looks at ming as they linger there in the wake of joe's request looks like a goodbye, the way his eyes soak in every detail of ming's face. despite all of this and the nightmare it has turned into he did love ming, perhaps still does, and he does have some of those good memories he was so desperate to keep.
though like.. joe.... maybe we could consider a different career path??? instead of just jumping to risking our lives? like sure food service sucks, cashiering sucks, etc. but you aren't in danger of falling off any cliffs, you know? and let's be real, he could just go into modeling with those looks.
it's my impression that when ming calls joe he looks haggard, like he's lost numerous nights of sleep (and we really don't know how much time has passed) but either way it does seem like he's at least done some amount of reflecting. his voice comes across soft, subdued, and sincere.
and after everything, back in the present, we see ming. he's still in the apartment, desperately calling joe's name all these years later, still unable to sleep and waiting for joe to come home just like he asked him to years ago.
maybe ming never wanted to enter the entertainment industry before, but he has now. perhaps it was never for the attention or the money, maybe he chose to promote those watches because it was a reminder of the gift from joe. and maybe this job, in this specific industry, is the closest he can feel to joe now. and maybe with new influence and connections ming can find out why he was never able to tell joe he loved him before he lost him.
WHO KNOWS, NOT ME, CAN'T WAIT TO FIND OUT THO
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