#y'all really do the absolute most to pretend that he meant (and means) nothing to her

[samwpmarleau]

lmao just saw the same person who said “keeley calls both jamie and phoebe ‘sweetheart,’ clearly she thinks of him as a child” say “aww r*y puts both keeley and phoebe over his shoulder, he loves his girls so much”

like pick a lane

do you believe words/actions can have different meanings depending on context or not

[xxanaduwrites]

DOWNFALL | a.b.

main hub of all important thangs

chapter 6

got your hands at the back of my soul and the more that i show you the more i'm afraid that you're gonna wake up and realize i'm not the one — paranoid, lauv

——

Butthead's snazzy shirt stared at me for an entire week.

After the superhero moves I pulled a few days ago with my sidekick — or maybe I was the sidekick and he was the main hero, considering how he was saving me the entire time — I got back to work an exhausted wreck.

Levi — wanting to throw Dax in the back dumper, as he so beautifully put it — needed a good gossip fix to make up for the pain he endured the entire time I was gone. Like a whole reporter on the scope, he barreled every question he could think of, while continuously going on about how fucking tiny the world was. How it was crazy the universe just threw us back together like that — that it was a sign.

Superstitious Jeans.

He also flipped the fuck out when he realized I was wearing Austin's shirt. Of course, his mind quickly went in the gutter, assuming we fucked around to which I immediatly denied. Even when I tried explaining the whole coffee shabackle, his smirk and knowing eyes that really knew absolutely nothing — didn't buy a word I said.

It was like I was talking to an entire brick wall.

"You can say whatever you want." He told me. "But I saw the way that hunk so smoothly caught my keys and then caught you. Y'all were staring at each other for a solid minute."

I wanted to throw myself on the floor, roll over, and dissolve into the floorboards.

Seeing where Levi's perspective on the matter lied, I was grateful Austin had texted me first when I was in the lot. Saved me the trouble of ever bringing it up to Jeans and giving that boy ideas. With my luck, Levi — being the wingman he loved to be — would totally take my phone when I wasn't looking, pretend to be me, and flirt his head off with Austin.

Would be better off if he didn't know I had his number.

That night, I locked up, went home, and peeled off his shirt. I still had no fucking clue what kind of cologne he laced his clothes with, but my god that shit smelled good. The most devastating part was tossing it in the wash.

A part of me wished I never did so while another was happy I could finally breathe proper air that wasn't drugged up in his scent.

Now, it just sat there, perfectly pressed and hung up on the doorknob of my closet. Like some sort of blaring billboard, it flashed its lights at me every single time I walked in my room. The worst was when I sat on my bed. I couldn't focus on my book, my laptop, or even the television — which were my favorite down time activities — with that thing just sitting there, staring straight into my soul.

I felt like I was going mad.

Being that today was Sunday, the bookstore was closed and I was off from work — meaning I had nothing to do. Syd always went to the gym or surfing on the weekends. It alternated depending on her mood, the weather, and if she had a competition coming up. Something I was glad she did without me, considering me and any form of physical activity in an athletic-esce form did not go together at all. Let alone get along.

Definitely not all chummy.

My noodle arms could never keep up.

Apparently she decided on the gym today, bringing Brock along for the ride — which hinted that she'd be gone for longer than usual. That meant, I was home alone, but not really alone — chilling with my not-so-good pal, Austin's shirt.

I needed out.

Bad.

I came to this conclusion when I found myself reading over a particular page ten times over, not grasping a single word of my book. And I was sitting in the living room — for fucks sake! Nowhere near Butthead's shirt. It was then that I figured I really needed to get out of the house — even though I really didn't want to.

As if this wasn't already bad enough, this man not only weaseled his way into my two favorite places, but also managed to infiltrate his presence into my bedroom where my bed — who was my main squeeze and boyfriend — lived — without ever stepping foot inside! Now, I guessed it was the whole fucking apartment.

Fan-fucking-tastic!

Getting kicked out of all my homes. Now where would I live?

With a huff, I grabbed my keys and tossed my book in my bag before heading out for the day. Where? I didn't know. But I was sure it would be one of the two places I usually went to. The bookstore was obviously a no for today. So that left me with Sunshine Spot.

I could only hope for the best.

Popping in my earbuds, I began my descent down the familiar stairs and out the door of my complex. When I stepped outside I almost went blind from how sunny it was. I immediately fished for my sunglasses, placing them on the bridge of my nose.

Sometimes I wondered if I was a vampire from how sensitive I always got. Or maybe it was just my introverted side making up more excuses to not leave the house. Either way, I definitely pulled off the 'fuck off, leave me alone' look with my earbuds in and my shades on. Not having to listen or look anyone in the eye sounded perfect to me.

And it was.

Until I got to my destination.

But to be fair, it was completely my own fault.

My dumbass was actually looking at her cellular device, trying to change the song I was listening to — but of course being the old piece of shit it was, the thing decided to lag on me right as I was walking through the door. Robotically, I messed around with every app and button known to man trying to fix it, but it just kept playing this one song that reminded me way too much of my awkward teenage years.

Somehow I managed to get to my favorite booth in the joint without even looking up. Sliding into the seat backwards, my back hit the wall and my knees shot up to my chest like a fetus — sideways in the booth.

I couldn't sit like a whole grown human — at all.

When I went to turn and slam the side of my phone on the table to wake it up, I almost died right on the spot when I realized someone was sitting across from me in my peripheral vision. Shutting my eyes for a moment, I tried to brace myself for what I would come face to face with —whoever was on the other side. Trying to figure out some sort of lame excuse that wouldn't make me look like a complete weirdo for sliding right into a booth that was already rightfully claimed.

Taking a breath and finally opening my eyes, I shut them just as fast when I captured the image of the person in front of me. Either I was losing my mind, or it was in fact him who was sitting in the same damn booth as me.

Saying him, I meant Austin with all of his butt related names.

You've got to be shitting me right now.

Why was this always happening to me?

Was he fucking following me or something?

Did his shirt manifest his presence right in front of me? —saying, 'Ha! Jokes on you! You can't escape me no matter how hard ya try!'

Reopening my eyes, I ripped my headphones out of my ears and absolutely lost it. "You!" I pointed at him as if I was blaming him for something — which I mentally was.

"Me?" he questioned and apprehensively confirmed, bracing a hand against his solid chest that was clad in a simple white t-shirt— clearly not understanding where I was going with this.

My mouth decided to work on its own accord and not cooperate with my brain. "What the hell are you doing here?" I grilled him immediately.

For a moment, he just stared at me blankly, seeming equally as confused but also slightly amused with the way his lips curled up. "Nice to see you too," he mused. Biting his lip, he looked down at the table. "Um." I followed his gaze, noting a small black moleskine journal that was sandwiched between his hands. One was inside the book, serving as a bookmark for whatever page I assumed he was writing on while the other was braced on top with a pen firmly tucked in between his fingers. It looked like I had totally interrupted his journaling— or journalism, if you will. "I should be asking you the same thing." He said, tilting his head as he studied me.

"Right," I sighed, readying myself for my long awaited explanation. "I didn't realize someone else was sitting here. Sorry —I'll just go."

I was in the process of awkwardly maneuvering myself out of the booth — finally rearranging my legs to be in a normal seating position when his husky voice spoke up. "No," he stopped me. "I mean, you can stay if you want. I'm not waiting on anyone anyways. Unless you're waiting on someone yourself."

"I'm not. Thanks, but —I don't want to disturb you, if you're working," I declined his offer, already feeling like a total intruder. Even though he unknowingly intruded on my favorite spot to sit when it came to avoiding people and having my own personal space to breathe.

"It's fine," he reiterated, not giving up for some reason unknown to me. "I was just finishing up anyways." To prove his point, he opened his journal back up, tucking his pen inside before closing it.

Looking around, I quickly assessed the available tables, only to come up short with a place to sit. The lunch hour was already hopping, meaning the joint was in fact packed and there was nowhere to sit that wouldn't have me up in somebody else's grill — listening in on their conversations. If I had to hear one more lady discuss the latest hot gossip about her neighbor's affair like a true Soap Opera while I was trying to read my book — I was gonna lose it.

"Sure," I gave in, unslinging my tote from my shoulder and shoving my phone and headphones inside.

It wouldn't kill me to sit with him for a little bit.

Right?

"So..." he began, starting some sort of conversation. "Did you end up at that nightclub?"

Well that was one way to get my attention.

"I'm sorry?" I questioned, totally not catching on to what he was going on about. Suddenly feeling extremely nervous, I braced my hands together on the table, hoping he wouldn't notice that I was shaking as I messed around with the rings on my fingers."What nightclub?"

He cupped his hand over his chin, displaying his ring cladded fingers that bounced against the light from the lamp hanging above us. Today he wore a few different silver bands that I found myself staring at. "The one your friend behind the counter said he was turning your bookstore into." He explained shyly.

"Oh!" He remembered that? "No." I shook my head, laughing lightly at the memory. "He didn't — thankfully."

"Good," he said. " It would've been a shame if he'd done it. I'd never get a chance to go back there and scan the collection if a dance floor and bar replaced all the shelves."

Picturing Levi running an entire nightclub that had a Saturday Night Fever Vibe with a John Trovolta-esce dance floor that lit up and changed colors, simultaneously made me want to laugh and cry. Laugh because I knew Marlon would absolutely be beside himself, and cry because I would lose it if Levi fucked up my displays and let people destroy the vintage portion of the collection where our rare books could be found. If I could take in all those babies I would.

Trying my hardest not to make a smart ass comment, I agreed with him."That would be devastating."

Which then left me to immediately overthink it.

Devastating in the sense of the bookstore being destroyed or devastating that he'd never get to see it?

Oh god.

What if he thought I was flirting with him — thinking I'd be saddened not to see him again?

"Maybe I could just shove all the books in a back closet and hide in there while he parties," I tried to save myself. "Problem solved."

"As long as it's against a wall, so you could live up to your name," he replied, reminding me of the 'Wall Girl' title he gave me.

"Very funny," I threw out sarcastically, rolling my eyes as a busboy placed two glasses on the table — filling them up from a pitcher of water. "And I'd have to lock up my toothpick umbrellas in a safe. Wouldn't want you ruining my pretty drinks."

"Oh?" He perked up with that one, intrigue flooding in his curious blue eyes. "So I'm invited to this theoretical nightclub?"

Oh. My. God.

"Um." My cheeks heated at the implication, making it impossible for me to conjure up some sort of response. He had me cornered. "I-I wouldn't be surprised if Levi invited you." Volly saved. His brows confirmed to me that he wasn't sure who I was talking about. "Levi is my co-worker. The dude behind the desk," I confirmed to which he nodded in understanding once it all clicked.

"Hi. Welcome to Sunshine Spot. I'm Sherry, and I'll be your server today." My favorite lady came over to take our order, whisking us out of our conversation. Flicking through her order pad, she didn't realize I was sitting right in front of her. "What can I get —" She immediately trailed off once she caught my eye, surprise washing over her features. "My girl! I should've known you'd be sitting here. My intuition must've served me right and felt your presence."

"Hey Sher," I greeted her back, my nerves subsiding as my gratitude rose the moment she appeared. It must've totally gone over her head that I was right here since I normally always sat alone.

She smiled back at me, before she glanced over at Austin, giving him a hard stare. "Who are you?" She asked him, her whole demeanor changing as she took him in.

"Austin," he introduced himself, a picture perfect smile gracing his face — totally disregarding Sher's judging stare in an attempt to butter her the fuck up. "It's nice to finally meet you in person."

She looked even more taken aback, baffled that he could say such a thing to her — completely forgetting they talked the other day.

Good.

Humble him.

"Sher." I got her attention. "You spoke to him the other day on the phone." She still looked lost, so I elaborated. "You thought I was being kidnapped while I was ordering coffees for Syd's meeting."

"Oh!" She clapped her hands, piecing it together. "That was you?" He nodded. "Good. Now I can keep my eye on you. If you even try anything with my girl here I will not hesitate to —"

"Alrighty then!" I cut her off, reaching for a menu and shoving it across the table for Austin to look at. "Shall we order?"

"Mhm," Austin mumbled as he flipped a page, searching it over.

God, this was fucking awkward.

Don't get me wrong, I loved Sher's spirit to death, but this was not the time for threats especially when there was nothing between me and Austin. We weren't even close enough to be considered friends.

"The usual for you, dear?" Sher asked, making it blatantly obvious of my regular appearances here.

"Yep," I confirmed, popping the p in exaggeration while passing the menu back to her.

Taking it from me, she turned to Austin with absolutely no cheer presence. "And for you?" She was already flexing her hand for the menu like she couldn't be bothered.

"Um. Just a coffee," He said simply. "Black. No milk or sugar, please."

"God." She put the hand with the pen over her heart dramatically. "Is that it?

We both nodded.

"Interesting." She paused for a moment. "Do you kids ever eat or just feed off of coffee like it's a drug?" She inquired, but didn't wait for us to respond. "I'm sending over fries and gravy for you two so I know you're not starving yourselves, and I can sleep peacefully tonight." She decided, jotting that last order down before walking away with no argument.

"I take it that you just ordered a coffee too? Nothing else?" he weighed, clearly reading between the lines.

"Just the drug," I firmly stated. "Certified junkie."

A stupid toothy grin threw up all over his face at my words, his eyes crinkling as they tightened in hysterics. I couldn't help but join him as he laughed his ass off right in front of me. It was the first time I ever saw him completely lose it like that, and it was such a fascinating sight to see. Especially since he always tended to hide it in front me.

Swiping a hand over his face to compose himself, he unknowingly pushed a curl out of the expanse of his hair.

"Makes the two of us," he said once he could get the words out without cracking up again.

I couldn't help but stare at the blonde lock casually lingering against his forehead like Danny Zuko. I supposed it really was a Grease kind of day. "Hm," I teased. "I'm the top junkie. Let's see if you fit the qualifications for certification."

Somehow, I managed to cough up the confidence to look him in the eye as he said, "Wow. Big words for the bookstore girl." He held his hands up in defense. "I see how it is."

Bookstore girl.

"What?" I inquired, absolutely flushed. "Scared you're gonna lose to the reigning champ?"

Thankfully a server came over with our drinks, and his gaze was trained on our coffees right in front of us. "Nope. I'm ready for the challenge." He licked his lips as he anticipated the taste of the coffee on his tongue, preparing himself for our little game.

Oh fuck.

"Of course you ordered black coffee," I spat out, not thinking before I spoke — far too focused on his perfectly sculpted cherry lips.

"What's that supposed to mean?" He leaned over the table, sizing me up.

"I don't know," I sighed, messing around with the straw stabbed into the lid on my drink. . "Reminds me of my basic ex-bosses at the publisher company. Boring bitter drinks, boring bitter men," I recalled, the memories of fucking up drink orders at my internship permanently etched into my head.

"So you think I'm boring and bitter?" He scoffed, clearly offended.

Shit.

Fuck.

"No!" I almost yelled, my heart racing out of my chest as I tried to think of a good way to maneuver out of the grave I just dug myself in. "I mean — not that you are boring or bitter. Well, I — I get milk and creamer in my drink, but that doesn't make me cool or peachy. Just the opposite. Trust me, I'm known to be very boring and bland. It's my middle —"

"Rianne!" He called, a smile etching onto his face as he cut me off. "I'm only joking with you." It was then that I felt his thumb dig into the side of my hand where my thumb and pointer finger met as if he was trying to bring me back to reality.

Oh.

Hello?

The realization dawned over me that in the middle of my excitement, I must have reached across the table and trapped his hand under my own out of reflex to console him in some fashion.

My fingers immediately tensed at the contact.

"Right," I gulped. A wave of electricity shooting from my fingertips all the way up to my arms jolted me awake, and I pulled back sheepishly.

Wrapping my hands around my drink, I tried to cool my hand down that felt awfully hot. I took a sip, tasting straight up sugar and creamer with the perfect amount of bitterness as a means to distract myself from the obvious.

I watched as he did just the same, using his other hand — that was never locked in my hold — to pick up his drink and take a sip. My eyes traveled to his other hand that was still braced on the table — still and unmoving. I thought I imagined it when his hand flexed for just a moment before he pulled it away.

"Hm," he hummed in satisfaction, averting my attention back to his face. "Pretty good," he complimented the coffee before taking another sip.

"The best," I hyped it up, almost halfway done with my own cup.

"I now understand why you come here so much," he commented in between sips before going back to our previous conversation. "So you used to work for a publishing company?"

"Interned," I clarified. "Not my finest moment, but hey — guess it just wasn't for me."

"Do you like the bookstore?"

He wanted to know if I liked working at the bookstore.

He wanted to know something about me.

"Yeah, I love it," I answered quickly, before I could over-think it any longer. Taking one last big sip, I almost slammed my cup on the table. "Done!"

"No fair," Austin whined, completely stunned. "They filled yours with a shit load of ice."

"Are you accusing me of cheating, Mr. Butt-ler?" I exaggerated the butt part again, absolutely cheesing my head off as I fucked around with him.

Not actually fucked.

Just joking.

Busted his balls a little.

Welp, that didn't sound any better. Anyways —

"Not that again." He blew out a breath, his gaze training upward as he tried to remove the curl off his forehead in frustration.

My hand suddenly tingled at my side, itching to reach out and touch him — to move the curl from his forehead. I momentarily wondered if his hair was as soft as it looked from here.

Jesus.

Focus, Rianne.

Maybe Sher was right. Maybe coffee was a drug. Maybe one of those peeps at Syd's office infected me or doused their addictive stimulants into my beverage.

Shoving my hand under my leg, I settled. "It's not my fault you nurse it like a baby."

"Maybe we should've ordered espresso shots," he suggested, ignoring my comment right as another server placed a plate of fries and gravy on the table for us. "Could be a hit for Levi's party though."

"Don't give me ideas now," I warned him, pointing a gravy covered fry in his direction accusingly to which he just smirked at me before munching on his own stick of potato — if you will.

A strange silence washed over us as we indulged in the plate, my mind suddenly feeling cloudy and heavy with every intrusive thought imaginable. For some reason, I couldn't comprehend the fact that I was here with him, in my favorite booth, sipping coffee and munching on fries — looking like this was a normal usual thing.

Something we did all the time.

Together.

The thought lingered with me for longer than I liked, burrowing itself deep into my insecurities and worries.

Warning me to flee.

Warning me not to get attached.

"Good, you're both eating." Sher was suddenly there, leaning an arm against the top of Austin's side of the booth observing us. "Everything good, my girl?" She asked me, going back to ignoring him once she was satisfied that he was being fed.

"Great," I forced out — my smile feeling robotic as I attempted to stretch it across my face.

Everything was fine, and now it just wasn't.

She sent a strange look my way, suspicion written all over her face as her eyes scanned back and forth between us. Sherry knew me well – well enough to know when something was up with me. Well enough to pick up my social cues in a heartbeat.

Before she could even let out a single word, my hand ventured into my tote bag searching for my wallet. "I probably should go." I told Austin, placing some cash on the table to contribute to my share.

"Wait – Take it back," he urged, pushing the cash back in my direction and then whipped out his credit card, trying to hand it over to Sher.

Not again.

Rolling my eyes, I picked up my cash and shook it in front of Sher. "Who are you gonna side with on this one? The dude you just met or your girl?" I questioned her, narrowing my eyes as a test.

Shaking her head, she crossed her arms in front of her chest. "Neither of you." She surprised us both. "On me. I'm not gonna wait and watch you two argue it out. I've got orders to take and shit to do." She raised her manicured hands up in surrender. "Goodbye."

And then she just disappeared – leaving us sitting there confused.

In a quick attempt to stop him from even thinking about paying for me, I left some cash on the table as a tip for Sher since she didn't leave us a receipt before decking out of there. I ball parked what I thought the price would be and hoped and prayed she just took it. If not, someone else would. Either way it would go to a place I appreciated.

Looking back, I watched him leave his own wad of cash – which was definitely too much money at this point for two coffees and some fries – before trailing behind me – his steps urgent. On the way out, I thought I lost him, but heard the bell above the door ring the moment I stopped at the corner looking both ways to cross.

Damn it.

Long legs stopped right next to me as I went to click the button for the crosswalk. "You're walking?" he asked, surprising me when he dropped the 'I'm paying-no-I'm paying' game.

Guessed it was settled — more than settled.

I sure as shit thought he was gonna say something along the lines of — "Just let me pay, Rianne," or "You'll get me back next time, Rianne" — just to get his way. Or maybe I was just thinking that because a part of my subconscious selfishly wanted to hear him say my name again. Wanted him to see me again. I already knew another part was already shutting that thought down — canning it in the trash bin of my brain.

You're gone.

Deleted.

"Yeah." I replied, squinting up at his tall frame against — what would soon be — a setting sun.

His golden locks shone in the light, complimenting the rays and his eyes looked even lighter — like a light blue sky reflecting off the ocean. Seeing him standing up gave me the opportunity to notice that he had on a pair of jeans and scruffed up brown boots — that looked like they'd seen better days — and now a black leather jacket.

"It's getting late," he muttered. "And the streets are gonna be packed with people and traffic now that rush hour is rolling around." Leaning against the post he finally ripped off the bandage. "Let me drive you home."

"Oh, so you do drive?" I teased, being a complete and total smartass.

"I was away for a while," he explained, pulling out a key from his pocket to drive his point further. Ha— drive? Car? Alright. Tough Crowd. Awful joke. "And I left it here, so it had to go into the shop for a check up when I came back. That's why I couldn't drive myself."

"Is it good? You sure it isn't gonna break down on us during the journey back home?" I asked suspiciously.

"I was in your friend La— Le— sorry, what is his name again?" His hand shot up to his head, his fingers massaging into his temples as if it was physically paining him to figure out what he was trying to say.

I knew not telling him would give me the upper hand, but watching him struggle started to pain me as well. "Levi."

"Levi. Right." He brushed his hand across his face just as he did in the diner. I wondered if it was a habit induced by stress. "I sat in his — no offense — pretty old car, and I let you drive me." He pointed out.

"True." I mean I couldn't deny the evident point he made. Levi's car was way passed the drinking age and probably even surpassed me by a few years — probably flirty and thirty. "No offense taken but, you didn't have much of a choice now, did you? And I wouldn't be driving this time, would I?"

"Well." He kicked off the pole, standing up straight. "No, but —"

I advanced towards him, so close I ruined the little line I mentally drew between us, my finger poking his chest.

"Exactly!" I stressed.

I won.

Two out of three.

Take that—Toothpick Umbrella Thief!

"Scared of losing control?" He quipped, biting on that ridiculous lip for the a millionth time today — seeming completely unphased by my close proximity and more amused by my evident aggravation.

"How do I know you're a safe driver?" I avoided his question, whispering like it was some sort of confidential secret. As if we weren't standing on a busy street in Los Angeles, but in a library with a librarian shushing us across the way.

"You'll just have to find out for yourself," he breathed, his face towering over mine — so close I could feel his breath fanning across my skin.

Too close.

I shouldn't have done that.

I pulled away.

"Thanks, but I walk all the time," I attempted to deny another one of his offers, staring up at the stupid light stuck on green — waiting for the damn thing to turn. "I'll be fine." I assured him, sending him a tight lipped smile as I pressed the button again, but with a bit more umpt this time.

He sent a funny look my way, before lifting up his sleeve and sniffing his arm. "Do I smell or something to you?" He asked in all seriousness, his nose scrunching up as he tried to figure it out. "Is that why you want to get away from me so bad? Cause if so, you can just tell me straight up." He joked.

If he meant smell good — yes, in fact he smelled so good, I found it really hard to concentrate. Which meant I needed to get as far away from him as possible.

But, I knew what he meant.

And he sure as shit did not smell bad at all.

"No." I let out a short laugh. "I already intruded on your booth, your work, and your late lunch. You should be sick of me at this point."

"I'm not sick of you," he said just as fast, proving to me that he was truly trying to say whatever would please me to get me right where he wanted me. "In fact. If I remember correctly, you have a shirt of mine that I have to get back from you. So it's a win-win — I drive you home, you give me the shirt." He stuck out his hand, initiating to shake on it. "Deal?

Fucking stubborn.

Taking a long hard breath, I let the steam shoot right out of my ears as I reached out and shook his hand. My body immediately caved once his warm hand engulfed my small one— our rings clanking together. My mind screamed at me to pull away, but —

"Deal."

Electric.

If it meant giving him his shirt back so I could finally live at peace in my own home — so be it.

——

it's the way i was cheesing like a total idiot while writing this chapter —smiling at typed words on a screen. anyways, hope you enjoyed <3 —xanadu

[therealvinelle]

I've always wondered this, but what do you think the Cullen's political viewpoints would be, given their individual backgrounds? if vampires don't change after they turn, then surely they would all be extremely racist (especially Jasper). would this not come up at some point? they aren't like the Volturi because the Volturi are too old to care, but the Cullens are young enough that they have been brought up with opinions on stuff like sexism, racism, homophobia and the like.

Oh fuck.

You get an early answer because otherwise I'll just chicken out and delete this one, pretend I never saw it.

UMMM.

Since I'm guessing you meant American political viewpoints, we need a disclaimer. I am not American, and not too knowledgeable about your politics. Not just in the sense that I don't follow the day-to-day drama, but as I am not an American citizen there are several things I don't know, can't know because I've never lived in your country and therefore can't know what the effects of living in a country ruled by American policies is like. What I do know is based off of the news in the foreign section, social media (by which I mean tumblr posts), and Trevor Noah's Daily Show.

I am an outsider looking in.

Which is really rather appropriate, since the Cullens are too.

The Cullens go to high school and college, Carlisle works, they pay taxes, they own real estate, and submerge themselves in American culture. Esme, Edward, Rosalie, Emmett, and Bella are young enough that this is in many ways their world, and apart from timeouts they've more or less spent their entire lives, human and vampire, integrated into American society.

Not fully integrated, mind you, they do what they need to to fit in and get to school or, in Carlisle’s case, to work. They go no further. No extra-curriculars for the kids, no book clubs for Esme, no game nights for Carlisle. They walk parallel to humans, not among us.

In addition to this they're obscenely rich, which puts them another thousand miles from the experiences of your average American. They won't deal with the health system, which means healthcare is a non-issue, they're not going to need welfare or other social programs, unemployment is another non-issue. Name your issue, and the Cullens don't have personal stake in it. Even the climate crisis won't be a problem for them the way it will for us.

What I'm trying to say is, American political issues are a concept to them, not a lived reality. Just like they are for me. So hey, you made a great choice of blog to ask.

I'll also add here that you say the Volturi are too old to care, and I agree- from an ancient's point of view, racism is a matter of "which ethnicity are we hating today?", and it all looks rather arbitrary after a while. Same with every other issue - after a while it all just blends together into "what are the humans fighting over today? Which Christian denomination is the correct one? Huh. Good for them, I guess."

I can't put it any better than this post did, really. The Volturi are real people, humans are nerds and tumblr having Loki discourse. Aro thinks it's delightful and knows entirely too much about Watergate (and let's be real, Loki discourse as well), but the point I wanted to get at is that politics really don't matter to vampires.

And I don't think they matter to the Cullens either.

So, moving on to the next point while regretting I didn't put headlines in this post, I'll just state that I don't think vampires' minds are frozen. Their brains are unable to develop further, and they can never forget anything, but... well, this isn't the post for that, but in order for this to be true of vampires they would barely be sentient. They would not be able to process new impressions, to learn new things, nor to have an independent thought process. Yes, we see vampires in-universe (namely, Edward, who romanticizes himself and vampires) believe they're frozen and can never change, but there is no indication that this is a widespread belief, or even true. Quite the contrary - Carlisle went from a preacher's son who wanted to burn all the demons to living in Demon Capital for decades and then becoming a doctor and making a whole family of demons. Clearly, the guy has had a change in attitude over the years. Jasper, in his years as a newborn army general, slowly grew disenchanted with his life and developed depression. James initially meant to kill Victoria and hunted her across the earth, then became fascinated and changed his mind about it.

Had these people been incapable of change, Carlisle would still be hating demons, Jasper would be in Maria's army, and James would still be hunting Victoria.

It goes to follow, then, that they are able to adapt to new things.

The question is, would they?

Here I finally answer your question.

So, we have these people who don't really have any kind of stake in politics, who keep up to date all the same (or are forcibly kept up to date because high school) and are generally opinionated people.

Where do they then fall, politically?

(And this is where you might want to stop reading, anon, because I'm about to eviscerate these people.)

Alice votes for whoever's gonna win. She also makes a fortune off of betting each election. Trump's 1 to 10 victory in 2016 was a great day to be Alice. MAGA!

The actual policies involved are completely irrelevant, she does this because it's fun. Election means she gets to throw parties. Color coded parties for the Republican and Democratic primaries, and US-themed parties for Election Night! (Foreigner moment right here: I at first wrote "Election wake" before realizing that's not what y'all murricans call it.)

Alice loves politics. Doesn't know the issues, but she sure loves politics.

Bella votes Democrat. She actually knows about the issues, and cares about them. This girl is a Democrat through and through.

Carlisle doesn't vote. I can't imagine it feels right. Outside of faked papers he's not a US citizen, this is meddling in human affairs that he knows don't concern him.

More, this guy has never lived in a democracy.

In life, Carlisle lived under an absolute monarchy that, upon civil war, became an absolute theocracy. From there he learned that vampires live under a total dictatorship.

For the first 150 years of his life, democracy was that funky thing the Athenians did in history books thousands of years ago, no more relevant to him than the Ancient Egyptian monarchy is to me. Then the Americans, and later other European countries started doing this.

Good for them.

There's this mistake often made by those who view history from a... for lack of a better term, a solipsistic standpoint. A belief that the present day is the culmination of all of history. “My society is the best society, the most reasonable society; all the others had it backwards. Thank god we’re living in this enlightened age!”

The faith in our current system of government is one such belief. We (pardon me if this doesn’t apply to everybody reading this post) have grown up in democracies, being told this is the ultimate form of rule, and perhaps that is true - but remember the kings who have told their subjects they had were divine and the best possible ruler based on that. Remember also that most modern democracies haven’t actually been democracies for very long at all, America is the longest standing at some 230 years (not long at all in the grand scope of things) and they have a fracturing two-party system to show for it.

Every society, ever, has been told they’re the greatest, and their system of government the most just. Democracy is only the latest hit.

This is relevant to Carlisle because he’s immortal and decidedly not modern. Democracy has not been installed in him the way it was the rest of the Cullens, Jasper included. To him- well, it’s just not his world. He has no stakes in our human politics, and as he is older than every current democracy and has seen quite a few of them fall, he’s not going to internalize the democratic form of rule the way a modern human has.

I think the concept of voting is foreign to him.

It requires a level of participation in human society that he’s simply not at. He does the bare minimum to appear human so he do the work he loves, but nothing more, and I find that telling.

As it is I think he'd be iffy about his family doing it. He won’t stop them, but in voting they’re... well it’s kind of cheating. They’re not really citizens, none of this will affect them, and by voting they’re drowning out the votes of real human voters. He does not approve.

Edward votes Democrat. He's... well he’s the kind of guy who will oil a girl’s bedroom window so he can more easily watch her sleep without being discovered, justifying it to himself as being okay because if she were to tell him to get lost he’d stop immediately. Same guy is so sure that he’d leave and never return again if she wanted him to, except this is the man who returned to Forks to hang around his singer, knowing there was a significant chance he might kill her. To say nothing of his Madonna/Whore complex, or of the fact that he tried to pimp out his wife twice, and was willing to forcibly abort her child.

This guy is very much in love with chivalry, with being an enlightened and feminist man who supports and respects women, while not understanding the entire point of feminism, which is female liberation.

He votes Democrat because he’s such an enlightened feminist who cares about women’s rights.

Emmett doesn’t care to vote, but if he has to he votes Republican. The guy is from the 1930′s, and has major would-be-the-uncle-who-cracks-racist-jokes-if-he-was-older vibes.

Esme doesn’t vote, that would require getting out of the house.

More, I just... can’t see it. I can’t see her being one to read up on politics and The Issues, period, but if she has to then I doubt she’d be able to decide.

Jasper doesn’t vote. Alice can have her fun, he does not care.

There’s also the whole can of worms regarding the last time he went to bat for American politics.

I imagine he stays out of this.

Renesmée doesn't vote. She has no stock in the human affairs. Who would she vote for, on what grounds? When Bella tries to pull her to the urns, she points out that she's three years old.

Rosalie, guys, I’m sorry, but that girl is definitely gonna vote Republican. Perhaps not right now as it’s become the Trump party of insanity, but the Mitt Romney type of Republicans? Oh yes.

And for the record, yes I imagine she does vote. To step back from politics would be another way she was relinquishing her humanity, and that’s not allowed to happen. So, yes, she goes to the urns, less for the sake of the politics involved and more because like this, she’s still a part of society in some way.

Now, onto why I think she’s Republican, I think it’s both fiscal and social.

This girl was the daughter of a banker who somehow profited off of the Depression, and who then became part of a family with no material needs that would soon become billionaires thanks to Alice. Poverty to Rosalie is a non-issue, as it is I imagine she views it as a much lesser issue than what she’s had to deal with. The humans can pull themselves up by their bootstraps, Rosalie’s infertility is forever.

Rosalie’s empathy is strongest when she’s able to project onto others, and she won’t be able to project onto the less fortunate at all.

Then there’s the fact that the Republican party is all about traditional family values, and pro-life.

Rosalie, a woman from the 1930′s who idolizes her human life and who‘d love nothing more than to get to live out this fantasy, is down for that. And as of Breaking Dawn she’s vocally pro-life, so there’s that.

This all being said I don’t think Rosalie cares to sit down and fully understand these politics she’s voting for, the possible impact they’ll have- that’s not important. What’s important is what voting does for her.

TL;DR: I bet anon regrets asking.

[cooloddball]

Someone submitted something in my inbox and they wanted to remain anonymous. Since this is an extremely long essay, I will put it under the cut. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK, YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!

xxx submitted: hey, i was the one who ask what do you think of Misha and Jensen's current relationship First off all thank you for your answear it means much to me cause im easy to be convice and this person who keep telling me that they are no longer friends can be so convicing, so I'm actully trying to forget what she said 😅 so I'm just writing a few. she said that since they no longer work together, they will forget about each other, and do their common things like the gay jokes, face touches ect. With other people, and neglect each other, don't talk to each other, and then meet new people who will replace the other. And and she talked about the gish thing, she said she sure they didn't talk since the end of the series, because Jensen didn't know where Misha was and Misha didn't know about the Radio Company vol 2 (but i saw people say that, they were just pretending, because Misha liked something about Radio Company Vol 2, before the gish live, so in theory he already knew then or something like that) and She said Misha wrote a poem about Darius not Jensen and now I will write down what she sent me : I saw a post about Jensen's current activities on social media, and I've come to the conclusion the only person he doesn't interact with is mish. Sadly this makes my break up theory even stronger. I feel like this is a goodbye to one of the biggest parts of my life. They've moved on from "uk what I haven't told you today? That i love u"+ from "miss my only jensen" from "i love u misha i mean it from the bottom of my heart" from "jensen has no flaws" from "misha is the funniest thing ever happened to me" from all that love and affection from everything they developed together and now they're apart leaving their lives like nothing happened and call me a dramatic but they both have the same energy now as someone has after a big break up. and Jensen comments on almost every of his friend’s post except Misha’s"+ Jenmish is genuinely the best thing that has ever happened in my entire life. I owe them literally everything. They're the reason i hold on. Unfortunately on this essay i have to start using past tense verbs for them, and i have to continue on that. I don't know for how long y'all been in spn fandom. But even if u joined one year before the show ended you'd know how close and intimate jensen and misha were. Everything about them was unmatched.+ The chemistry and how they just fit eachother. They had always been all over eachother. Like they were holding on eachother for dear life. They completed eachother and were like world's most powerful thing. They were the definition of soulmatism. No matter where, they ALWAYS kept interacting with eachother. Each possible tweet or insta post. On cons that the other wasn't there, the other one would bring up the othere's name for no absolute reason. +The looks and repeated love confessions. How invested they were both into eachother. The family they had built together cuz we know how close dee and mish are (look all the charity work they've been doing together recently). There are youtube videos to proof everything I've said so far.When i say break up, my real intention is that they've grown apart. Everything started in the the third or forth month of pandemic. Before than jensen used to interact +(comment mostly) on almost all of misha's posts. But after a while everything just stopped. At first personally didn't care that much. Bcuz I believed too much in them that I thought not even the gods above could separate them. I told myself maybe they spend long hours chatting or video calling and that's why online public interactions are gone. But as it passed it almost diminished to zero. Except some likes from jackles and eventual ones from misha there weren't anything else.+ We got absolutely no content and the show went off too. We were helpless and were sticking to everything we had Dee had a big social media shot down, so as jensen. Misha was busy with the election. We got some interviews for it with all of them. But we didn't get much.except remember both of them pulling a bff

move. and texted eachother during an online con where everyone else were dead-serious about politics? That flickered something in me. That showed me that+ they can't ever possibly let eachother go. And the times everyone else were talking and these too would just talk random things together (the one jackels had a white hat on with stacy abraham).And then Misha posted that for jensen's bday We really overlooked it. That shit was too intimate. To close. Fav march baby? U just don't go around and called ur bestie baby and when u mean it deeply. Especially not when ur friend is jensen ackles the "I suffered form internalized homophobia my whole life+ but fuck my wife's an angel and i have an angel bf too and another angel which is his wife but I'd rather die than come out cuz my asshole dad pulled a John winchester on me". It doesn't work like that. But uk how mish is. Carefree and open. I believe they got into a fight bcuz of this. He didn't even like the post. AND that was when the tiny bit of interactions we had was gone too. For a while jensen didn't even liked his posts. After a month it started again.What made me finally believe in that they had grown too+ far: I still remember the night misha posted that he and jensen were going to have a con for gish together. I remember how hard I cried. Lile the whole world was given to me. But deep down in my heart I knew that something would definitely happen. It didn't sit right with me and unfortunately my senses never lie to me. Jensen showed up at the wrong time bcuz of misunderstanding the time zones (this was HILARIOUS). That's not even my point.+ I've seen that interview 3 times so far. It always reminds me of when i saw my ex at a party and we were both so thrilled to see eachother and we still loved the other dearly, but we just couldn't work it out. Jensen and Misha's expressions were EXACTLY the same. The genuine smiles and longs pauses were they just stared at eachother. I'm so happy that it was online cuz if they actually gave that looks to eachother standing right next to the other one I would've collapsed. Misha didn't know that jensen's album+ was out. And he got so embarrassed when he found it out. He didn't know that jensen was on set and hadn't been home for 8weeks. Jensen had no idea where misha was. And this means that they hadn't talked in a long long time.When you're that close with someone for more than a decade, i mean THAT close, even if u're separated from eachother you'd at least check on the once a week, or at least once in two weeks. But it was vividly clear that they hadn't. I hate how this world works. They would always be in my heart.+ I would be thankful from them for everything. It hurts, and it won't stop and im so sure I'd be carrying this pain for a long time. They mean too much to a lot of us. Sometimes I think to myself that god i love them so much. Remember in 2019 when we used to get SO many jenmishdee interactions? That was LIT. It was THEE year for us. I hope they're doing good. I really do. I hope we don't get more proofs and I won't have to update this thread. Cuz my heart won't be taking it very+ well.Something i gotta add U may say that Jensen's busy and that's why he doesn't comment. But he comments on a lot of jared and his new costar's posts. So that's no excuse. So yeah that's it. I don't know what am I supposed to think. english isn't my native language, so sorry for the mistakes

Here is my response:

I don't know who this person who has been talking to is but I have to say they seem to be project their previous relationship experience on cockles.

I believe Jensen and Misha are okay and are together. Social media likes and comments don't mean anything. I mean it's not like Jensen or Misha used to comment on each other's posts before. Jensen didn't even wish Dee Happy Mother's Day this year, does that mean they are not together anymore? Nope. He has other best friends he has known for over 20 years like Jason Manns, Steve Carlson etc that he doesn't wish happy birthday, does that mean they are not friends anymore.

Please let's not put value on social media likes. I don't even follow my own family on sm and I don't always like or comment on my bf's or bff's posts on sm. So it doesn't mean anything.

As for the Gish Panel, I have talked about it before, the time Jensen was slotted to attend the panel, he was meant to answer fan questions. I honestly believe they decided to not do it at that time because they knew the questions would be about Destiel and not their new projects. If you watched that panel, Misha knew that Jensen's album was out as I pointed out. He was just trying to promote the album and soldier boy. He knew Jensen had also buffed out. It was all to promote Jensen. Anything else you hear is trolls and antis just being loud. Also don't forget Jensen called him "babe".

If Jensen and Misha weren't okay, he wouldn't have attended or participated all those panels Misha organized especially for Gish. Danneel also posts a lot about RA and likes Misha's posts. I am 100% Misha visited the Ackles when he went to Colorado last month.

Stop listening to trolls and/or antis or just people who are projecting and look at facts.

[nightswithkookmin]

TAE TELLS: JIKOOK

It's taken me days to get round to making this blog post- commenting on another Jikooker's analysis.

Now y'all don't need me to provide a tall list on all the reasons that this a bad bad idea for me. Lol.

Been there. Done that. Doesn't end too well.

Mi nar wan treble wif gudt piipel.

But I also don't want to shy away from the conversation; whether or not Tae is good at keeping Jikook's secret. Whether that is a tell. If it is, does that mean all the times he's 'exposed' Jikook were wrong analysis etc.

Let me start off by saying, I totally admire this content creator. I don't have a particular favorite Video creator- most of my go to YouTube jikook content creators are Spanish speaking content creators, Karmy and a few Iarmy- a lot of whom have disappeared off of the surface of the internet over the years.

These days I watch just about anyone that shows up on my recommendation or home feed. Used to leave comments and what not but I've refrained from that due to privacy issues and prefer to share my thoughts on my blog instead.

Haven't seen a lot of her analysis, but hands down agree with a lot of the analysis she's made in the few I've binge watched so far- thanks to y'all who recommended her to me.

I think for the most part she knows what the fuxk she is doing. She definitely knows what she is talking about in her videos and I like that. I admire that.

I don't disagree with anything I've seen so far on her channel. Especially her thoughts on Kook. Fearless Kook. Absolutely love those.

I think she could have taken time to flesh out her theory on this whole 'Tae is good at keeping Jikook's secret' bit cos it seems that's what causing the stir? I don't know.

'If Tae is good at keeping people's secrets then there is no way he could have exposed Jikook blah blah blah'

Sigh.

Tuktukkers will jump on anything to invalidate Jikook. Sigh. Sigh.

I can't put words in her mouth, but I don't think she was interpreting Jimin's words to mean that Tae is good at keeping others' secrets and so cannot 'expose' Jikook like we been saying in this part of stan land.

And if she did mean it like that then I'm afraid I'd have to humbly disagree.

My understanding of Jimin's assertion that Tae is good at keeping a straight face when it comes to others' secret is that, he meant Tae has a strong poker face and it's hard to tell when he is lying or telling the truth sometimes.

That's all Jimin was saying. In my opinion.

Which honestly, it's truth. Tae is such an actor. A talented one at that. I mean have you been watching Run episodes?! Ayayaya.

I won't play Russian roulette with him cos imma end up with bullets in my head.

Play Texas hold'em with him at your own risk.

I mean he is the king of blank expressions in BTS. Isn't that why RM describes him as 4D?

He's only what, honed that- should we call it skills, since debut! He's become a master at it. Add his impeccable acting skills to it and its kaboom.

His blank expressions to me sometimes seem like a coping mechanism, if you will. And often times, he deliberately induces it to mask his feelings- when someone says something he finds annoying or something he is uncomfortable with.

A typical example is when JK read 'Tae Kook' in the comments during their VLive and he pretended he didn't know what the fuxk JK was talking about- prompting JK to explain to him that that was their ship name yadda yadda. Insert skull head.

Now we all know HE KNOWS TAE KOOK.

I saw a lot of jokers running around teasing Tuktukkers with the whole "look, your bias don't know y'all ship exists bye'

Listen, I'd join in on the joke- nothing makes me happy than jokers pulling some tuktukker legs but just as long as we all know and agree that's not true.

They all know of their ships.

They've known since the beginning.

They know everything.

When he said get out of your imagination I don't think it was because he had no ideas what homegal was going on about on Weverse.

Tae has many tells. When he exchanges awkward looks with RM or Jimin when Jikook or JK does something outrageous that's a tell.

When he passive aggressively smirks after revealing a detail on the whereabouts of Jimin at 1am that's equally a tell.

The slight head tilt when he says Jk don't want Jimin to come that's equally a tell.

He is very observant.

He loves to observe Jikook when they are up in their shenanigans. In my opinion. So when he is quietly looking at Jikook, observing them with no expression on his face that's equally a tell.

JK is not the only one always watching JM.

I mean he was stood right behind Jimin when he and JK were taking turns staring at eachother while Joonie was busy being eloquent. Tae saw all of that but didn't react to it.

In the recent OT7 VLive when Jimin called Jk too big or something Tae was right behind them and as I pointed out in my analysis on that, he looked away almost as soon as JK turned to look at him- JK was conscious of Tae and he knew Tae was looking at them through the viewfinder.

Sometimes he feels compelled to call them out on it too like he did in the dynamite MV when he blurted out, let's not look in the cameras when JK and Jikook were about to do their weird eye fucking absolutely gay stuff that they be doing from time to time.

All these are tells. To me at least. And I think in her video she was simply pointing out yet another tell of Taes- his blank expressions around Jikook in certain moments.

Having a poker face is one thing, having a blank expression is another.

Like I said his poker face is deliberate. He turns that on in various situations ranging from mild to not so serious circumstances like keeping others from finding out he is a mafia in a game etc.

His blank expressions are often times involuntary. His resting face. Sometimes I don't even think he realises he's blanked out.

When he don't know what to do with himself he blanks out. It's similar to how JK intensely focuses on Jimin when he doesn't know what to do with himself on set or when the cameras are rolling.

When he isn't intensely focusing on Jimin he becomes fidgety or sometimes does some really weird expressions that have popularly become various memes under the heading Jungshook.

It's not just Tae. It's not just Jimin. They all have their tells and go to expressions when they don't know what to do with themselves on camera.

Tae has a strong poker face, he is a master of blank expressions, and he is notoriously one of the most passive aggressive members in BTS.

Any of these can be tells depending on the context and situation.

-As long as we are able to distinguish between these moments and expressions I suppose.

His expression when Jikook were narrating the rain fight for example would be a blank expression and not a poker face in my opinion- a poker face is a deliberate state of induced expressionless demeanor.

Yes he had a blank expression. But I don't think that that was deliberate. That's just his go to resting face when he is not active in a moment most times.

I found his comment, 'that was a long time ago' much more telling that he knew about the rain fight and that expression of embarrassment he had on later equally said that he knew and thought Jikook were being gay unprovoked.

But that is my thought process.

I gotta respect hers too. It's valid.

Him going blank dead silence when Jimin said he loved waking up to see JK's face was more of that 'awkward, can't believe JM just did that shook moments' he gets around Jikook from time to time when they do something very shocking and gay.

I'd be lying if I said I understood what she was driving at with that bit in her video but I don't totally disagree with that.

By her stating that, I don't think she implied the opposite of it. Nor did Jimin by his statement.

Tae has a good poker face don't necessarily mean he is good at keeping secrets. I think it is much more nuanced than that.

I mean he is good at keeping your secret until he misses his best friend and soulmate then it's 'JK don't want Jimin to come' 🤺🤺🤺

Sometimes I wish Jimin were a triplet so I can slipt him between Tae, JK and RM. Suga and Hobi don't mind sharing him with the others and it seems Jin only wants his mirror so... Lmho.

And yes, Tae does give Jikook away from time to time- blank face or not.

I hope this helps??

Signed,

GOLDY

[sarcastic-sunshines]

Before Abiona Interlude Part 8: Meet the Parents Part 2

Pairing: T’ Challa x Black!Reader

Warning(s): None

Link to ABIONA by @aloevverified

Link to Face claims (2)

Previous Chapter: Interlude Part 7

A/N: It's been a minute since I've updated this story, and I still love it and have written quite a bit of it and just haven't shared. I'm gonna be posting the chapters I have done and updating my masterlist. I won't be tagging anyone but if you do find time read, I hope to hear what you think about it. As always, hope y'all are staying safe, and please go get vaccinated.

Meet the Parents Part 2

T’Challa checked his watch before turning back to the television. Alix had been getting ready for a long time. He was more than ready to head to dinner with his mother and Shuri. Alix as usual was taking her sweet time finding something to wear. It seemed to be taking a little longer today, and T’Challa knew it was the nerves. He finally got up and headed to the bedroom to find Alix on the floor in one of his T-shirts. He smiled a bit at the site but also knew that meant his closet had been raided and was probably a mess.

“Alixandre, may I ask why you are on the floor in my shirt while this room looks like a tornado has made a visit” Alix rolled her eyes before turning to look at him.

“I can’t find anything to wear”

“That is because your closet is a mess”

“No! It’s because nothing fits! I look like a beachball!” T’challa took a step back sensing her frustration.

“Okay, how about you and I work on this together?” he said, kneeling down to help her up.

“As much as sitting here sulking feels like the preferred option I cannot let you do that so how about we get up and find something that I know you will look amazing in. Plus I am looking with non-judgemental eyes”

“Fine” She reached down to grab a couple of the options she didn’t completely hate and dropped them on the bed next to where T’challa had decided to sit. She looked at him as though she was waiting for something.

“What is it?”

“Close your eyes I can’t change in front of you.” T’Challa rolled his eyes.

“Alix you can easily go to the bathroom, but to be honest there really isn’t anything I haven’t seen before,” He said with a smirk as Alix threw a piece of clothing at him.

“I don’t care. Close your eyes T’Challa” T’Challa continued to smile at how flustered she was becoming. “T’Challa now!”

“Okay, okay, okay” She slipped on the first look and faced him before tapping him to see.

“I think you look lovely, but you seem a little uncomfortable and the restaurant we are going to is a bit more formal.”

“I thought as much” She stared at T’Challa waiting for him to close his eyes

“Oh, right I forgot” She smiled softly before picking another dress and tapping T’Challa. He slowly opened his eyes and was immediately enamoured with Alix’s beauty.

“So are you going to just stare or are you going to say something” T’Challa blinked a few times before speaking

“Alix you look absolutely stunning. Just so much beauty that my words are lost” Alix smiled but looked away. “However, this is too formal. It is not a wedding, just dinner.”

She rolled her eyes, making T'Challa laugh as he closed his eyes.

“Okay, you can open now” T’Challa opened and smiled.

“I think we have a winner. You look gorgeous”

“You said that about every look,” Alix said, turning for T’Challa to help with the zipper while smoothing down her dress.

“And I was not lying, he said with a kiss on her shoulder. Plus you look comfortable in this one”

“Okay fashion critic, the show is over. Maybe you should start coming with me to the shop since you love everything” She joked

“I would be honoured. Now finish getting ready so we can go please.” T’Challa said before exiting the room. Leaving Alix to have to sit to gather her thoughts. She didn’t understand how someone could be so unintentionally sweet, yet it was one of her favourite qualities about T’Challa.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Alix peaked over at T’Challa as he drove, he looked calm, meanwhile, she felt like she was holding a huge breath that she wasn’t sure when she could release.

“So, I guess it is my turn to ask but is there anything about your mom or sister that I need to know that I don’t already” T’Challa glanced at her quickly and could feel the nervousness radiating off of Alix. He grabbed her hand and kissed it.

“ Don’t worry, you will be fine. My mother is very sweet, and will only ask you questions to try and get to know you. As for Shuri” He smiled before continuing “You will love her, she is the funniest and smartest person I know. But do not tell her I said that. It makes her head big”

“Sounds like someone I know,” Alix joked as T’Challa laughed. “So your father, he couldn’t make it then?”

T’Challa grew quiet as he carefully thought about what to say.

“Baba had a meeting that he would not - I mean could not miss. That he could not miss“ T’Challa grew quiet as he tried to steady his face to avoid showing any of the pain that his father’s disapproval brought him. Alix looked over and grabbed his forearm in an attempt to comfort him.

“No one said merging worlds was easy right?”

T’Challa smiled at the contact before nodding in agreement. As they pulled up to the restaurant, Alix noticed some women in simple black dresses and shaven heads waiting outside. T’Challa opened the door for her, he nodded in the direction of the women, confirming Alix’s suspicions that they were Doras.

They entered the restaurant and the hostess immediately recognized T’Challa and led the two of them to the back of the restaurant, which was already fairly empty despite the time of the evening. Alix held on to T’Challa’s hand and said

“ I mean I knew you were important, but never did I imagine being in a near-empty restaurant that is being guarded by your nation's most powerful warriors”

“Does that scare you?” He said, slowing down and looking at Alix.

“No, but it is just a bit strange if anything. I forget this is what your normal life is like. And reminds me how much you keep it away from me and I will be getting more exposed to once the baby is here”

“I hope you know I will try my best to maintain your sense of normalcy and independence. But let's not worry about that until later okay” T’Challa finally turned back to the hostess who held a door open for them. Once they were in, a huge smile covered his face as he let go of Alix’s hand and walked over to Shuri who he greeted by doing their handshake.

“It took you long enough brother. I was starving.” T’Challa sarcastically rolled his eyes still smiling before going over to his mother and hugging her and kissing her cheek.

“Hello Mama, I am sorry for being late. Though I have a good reason and she is standing over there” T’Challa held his mother’s hand and guided her towards Alix who was trying to portray the normal level of confidence she usually possessed.

“Mama, Shuri, this is Alix Ajayi”

“It is lovely to meet you Queen Mother”

“It is nice to finally meet you too. I have heard so much about you” She said pulling Alix into a hug.

“Yes, brother literally never stops talking about you. Like ever” Shuri said before hugging Alix who quietly laughed as T’Challa struggled to hide his embarrassment.

“I have other matters I discuss”

“Yes, but your favourite is Alix and the baby.”

“Maybe we should all sit now,” Ramonda said as the siblings stopped their bickering. Alix took a seat next to T’Challa who casually placed his hand on her thigh. He had become more physical with her as time went on, but for some reason, she was letting her boundaries fall and couldn’t find it in her to do anything but enjoy it.

“Alix you look beautiful by the way. You are absolutely glowing” Ramonda complimented

“Yes, your outfit is amazing. The colour red looks lovely on you” Shuri continued

“Thank you both”

“So how far along are you now?”

“I am six and half months. More than halfway there” Alix replied smiling at T’Challa

“That’s less than three months. So am I having a niece or nephew because I have a few name suggestions for both” T’Challa decided to answer for Alix.

“Actually Shuri, we do not know. We are keeping it a surprise”

“Why?”

“Yes why Alix, I have been asking T’Challa for weeks and still nothing. I was telling him that I have some baby designs I would love to get started on”

“I know you all find out quite quickly, but I have just decided to wait and find out when the baby is here.”

“Plus either way we will love the baby, and its sex does not matter. And mama you can make clothes after I promise” T’Challa said knowing Alix did not feel like sharing her reasoning with anyone so he did not mind keeping his family out of the loop on this one. He was just happy that he was able to see the three most important women in his life sitting together. Food was brought out and everything seemed to be going well.

“Alix, do you have any siblings?” Shuri asked.

“ I actually have a younger brother. His name is Jules. He is really funny but has a big heart. We have a big age gap like you and T’Challa.”

“ Is he excited to be an uncle like Shuri here cannot wait to have the baby in her lab”

“I am hoping the baby will be as smart as me even though I am smarter than their Baba”

“I allow you to think you are smarter”

“Your designs and projects would beg to differ” Alix laughed at the exchange, it reminded her of Jules. She also loved how relaxed T’Challa was around his family, his smile appeared brighter

“ My designs and projects are just as good as yours little sister”

“Yet somehow remain archaic and lack swag”

“Shuri” Her mother warned as T’Challa smirked at his sister’s scolding. “Anyways, what about your parents Alix, how do they feel about this ?”

“They were both a bit apprehensive but they are now excited to be grandparents, especially maman. And she loves T’Challa. They are always gossiping to one another”

“Of course they are, Brother loves drama, but pretends he doesn’t”

“It is not pretending if it is true” All three women laughed at his statement knowing he was lying.

“Brother you know there is a new season of Golden City Housewives”

“Hmm, interesting” T’Challa said nonchalantly although everyone knew he was already scheduling time to watch it later.

“What about your father, how does he feel about everything?” Both T’Challa and Alix looked at each other trying to find the right words to describe Tolu’s disdain for T’Challa and his involvement in Alix’s life.

“Umm, he is coming around slowly”

“Well, at least he and Baba have something in common” Shuri said as she avoided her brother’s piercing eyes. “Anyways, I have to know, what in Bast name attracted you to my brother”

“Shuri!”

“What I need to know, she is dating him” T’Challa and Alix again turned to each other.

“Actually, we aren’t dating, right now just focused on bringing this little person into the world,” T’Challa responded as Shuri looked at them skeptically.

“You are kidding right”

“No we're not, your brother and I are taking this slow”

“Not with all that hand holding your not” Alix immediately let go of T’Challa’s hand. T’Challa looked a little hurt but wasn’t shocked by Alix’s reaction.

“Why don’t we get dessert and then Shuri and I can start heading home.” Everyone awkwardly agreed before calling the waitress over.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The ride home did not lose its awkwardness and at home was not different. They got home late so Alix assumed they would just go to bed. But T’Challa never showed up. So she rolled out of bed and headed to the living room where only the light from the television was illuminating the room. She found T’Challa eating the cheesecake that he made the waitress pack for him, totally absorbed by whatever he was watching. She slowly approached him and he turned to look at her. He paused the tv before speaking.

“I thought you were sleeping”

“ No I was waiting for you but you never came” Alix took his plate to the kitchen and added a slice of cheesecake and another fork before coming back and sitting next to T’Challa. “What are you watching?”

“Golden City Housewives” Alix turned to look at him as he tried to hide his smile.

“You are so predictable sometimes”

“The housewives of Birnin Zana are much different from the Americans yet hold the same level of dramatics. It is good research. And I had to see whether Bugani ever confronted Akhona about not choosing her restaurant as the location for her gallery” Alix laughed as she took a bite and laid her head against his shoulder. T’Challa noticed and smiled, “Fair warning Alix, all this contact may cause the TV to think we are a couple” Alix lifted her head to face him

“I didn’t mean to make you feel like-”

“I didn’t feel anything. I wasn’t surprised. You do this quite often and that is okay. I wish you wouldn’t but I understand that is all confusing to you” He said in between bites.

“ And this isn’t for you?”

“I came here knowing I wanted to be with you Alixandre. My time here has only turned that want into a need. I am just waiting for you to join me. I don’t mind waiting” He said before turning back to the television, leaving Alix to take in his face and marvel at the man who made her question every move that she made while also allowing her to be as carefree as she pleased.

“ Your mother is very sweet, yet she has a serious aura about her. I can see where you get it from. “

“Mama can be serious when she wants yes, but she definitely is often my comfort. It has really helped me to have her on my side during all of this”

“ And your sister is a firecracker. She makes me laugh”

“Yes, I saw how hard you laughed when I was the bud of the joke.” Alix giggled “But yes, despite the age gap, she sometimes is my best friend.” T’Challa ended with a smile, “I think it went well though. Shuri told me she really likes you”

“And your mother”

“She said she understands why my father had so many headaches dealing with you and she admires your persistence and sense of self”

“Hmm I like that, you think the worlds are starting to merge?” she asked while putting down the plate and leaning back on his shoulder.

“They have definitely moved closer,” He said, kissing her hand before closing his fingers around hers. Alix smiled and kissed his shoulder in return. T'Challa started to feel like a need as well. She didn’t know how to feel about it but was happy T’Challa was willing to wait for her to figure it out.

[primedirection]

The Difference

This is the final part of the series I hope y'all like it! Either way let me know. Fair warning though this is long.

You're somewhat of a hurricane once returning home and getting past the barrier of the door. Sweeping up and through everything you think you might need. Clothes, electronics, toiletries and more tossed into a suitcase.

You had no idea where you were going but anywhere was better than staying here to deal with his insufferable aloofness.

Thankfully you retrieved a headstart by ubering here with Gemma. Who was not only worried about you going off alone, but admittedly didn't want to risk giving off the impression of taking Harry's side by riding with him.

The quiet calm of the house is only temporary though, seeing as it's ruined as soon as he arrives. The very energy of it seems to seep and drain out at the sound of his voice in the distance. Arguing with Gemma about where you are. Which inevitably doesn't take long for him to figure out.

Without needing to look you can feel his gaze burning holes into you as he takes in the sight of you packing. A sharp surprised breath breaks the silence just before he urgently pleads, "Y/N, can we just talk for a minute,"

Especially after coming closer and seeing your almost full suitcase.

"We did that, and you still didn't listen. I'm done talking!" You reply aggressively shoving a perfume bottle inside of a side compartment. It was a favorite and you'd be pissed if you left it. "Now, I need some space,"

"Space for what?"

"To figure things out— to figure us out. I can't do that here,"

"What is there to figure out? We're getting married in several months. I love you, you love me. We love each other right?" Getting frustrated with spectating you going back and forth from dresser to suitcase, Harry takes it upon himself to interfere. Grabbing a top you just picked right out of your hand to make you focus on him.

Which was indeed annoying but it's more of what he said that bothers you, "Don't, don't do that,"

"Do what, what the hell am I doing now?!" He asks exasperated, raking his fingers through the front of his mane.

"Making it seem like I'm the one who had doubts all along! That's not true and you know it's not. You're the one that's had a funny way of showing it while I've been in this waiting for you to come around, and I can't keep doing that to myself!"

Taken aback he frowns hard, "That's not what I'm saying at all Y/N! I just meant that we're supposed to be spending our lives together why does this small thing have to change that?"

See this is why you wanted to go, you can feel your bugged eyes almost fall out of your head, "Small thing?! Harry we have major fucking issues!”

As usual he's in denial, "So what? No relationship is perfect, that's the whole point of working on it together. That's what makes it worth it,"

You snatch your top back out of his hand and blindly toss it in the suitcase beside you, "Together? Harry I don't even know what I did wrong for you to start treating me this way in the first place. It honestly feels like nothing I do is good enough for you anymore,"

Harry abruptly pauses at that, your words finally resonating with him. And if his crestfallen face was any indication of it, you'd swear that they bore an immense weight.

Not sure if it's to steady you or himself he halts you in place by the forearms pleading, "Stop, yeh don't mean that,"

"Yes I do," you sullenly affirm pulling away.

To hear you say that like it was the only thing that your were sure of, gutted him to the very core. Literally knocking the wind right out of him. You are his entire world that kept him going most of the time. How could he have fucked it up that royally bad to the point you couldn't see it? It profoundly terrified him.

He had to fix it, "Y/N you're more than good enough,"

Understandably so, you don't want to hear it, "Since when? Hmm? You said so your yourself, my little blue collar office party certainly wasn't."

In his current state of unnerved contrition, panic gets the best of him, "I never said that. Now you're puttin' words in my mouth,"

"Am I? Okay, lets pretend that's true.. It doesn't matter. You still never want to be around me. Hell I'm not even good enough for you to take the time out of your day off to work on our wedding! So why are we doing this?" You deadpan.

"Y/N, I admit that my timing was shit with Ken and you're right I really shouldn't have taken work out on you. I've been a right selfish prick. But just cos' I fucked up, doesn't mean that I don't want to be with yeh,"

You mutter a tongue in cheek, "Hard to tell," devastating him even more.

Being on the receiving end of the disparaging only makes him desperate, and in every sense.

He clutches onto you again, "Yeh know I love you, Y/N!" Defiantly you stare at the bed feeling yourself getting emotional, because you wanted to belive that again without doubt so badly. The menacing tightening in your chest and throat bring on the burning threat of impending tears. "Look at me lovie please?"

Sooner or later you do, annoyed that a few manage to escape. You wipe them away angrily with the back of your hand, "What?"

The look on his face is not only distressed but tormented, "Don't leave. Look I get it, I don't think about making you feel loved like it's something I've got to get done everyday. Yeh know? Like everything else, but it is and I'm going to from now on! I promise,"

"You've made promises before, how do I know that you'll keep this one?"

His hands slide down from your arms to hold both of your hands firmly. You noted as something he did out of habit whenever he wanted to stress something important to you, "Cos' anything else for us is not an option. I'll do whatever it takes,"

It's always sad when anything has to get to this point. But of course as reality would have it, nobody is perfect. As people we do need room to make mistakes in order to grow. Harry included. Faults aside, he was still very much the love of your life. For that he at least deserved the chance to prove himself.

Especially since he seems to be aware of his own errors now and finally taking accountability. It was the only way to move forward.

Although still perturbed in time you relent, "Fine. But I don't want to hear anymore talk of weddings or marriage until you prove to me that you're all in. Not until we're both sure that this is absolutely what we want,"

He wanted to argue til he was blue in the face that this is everything he wanted but settles for a relieved, "Okay then,"

Harry should've known that he was pushing it when he went to hold you right after, but he couldn't help himself. This very opportunity was on borrowed time and he refused to take it for granted. Even if it isn't reciprocated and is void of all enjoyment.

When he let's go you don't even look at him, you just get back to sealing and securing your suitcase. Which scares the life out of him, "Wait where-"

You sigh irritated, "I still need some space. I can't be directly up under you right now."

He wasn't estatic about it. Watching you brush coldly past him, but he'd compromise for you staying in the room down the hall over other extremes any day.

****

"You're on in ten!"

Harry should be used to Good Morning America by now after all the performances he's put on here, and yet here he was pacing. His stomach had been in knots from the moment he woke up this morning.

Normally the first shows were always the best and yet the worst. New music meant new reactions and although he trusted the unyielding support of his fans, others that weren't so nice would hear it as well. Which honestly wasn't so bad, it's just when he has to get on a stage and see their live reactions for himself is usually what's so nerve wracking. This time though he was a nervous wreck for one reaction in particular.

On cue of the third second his eyes land on the empty sofa across the room once again. He hadn't been able to stop checking for the past two hours. You said that you'd be here.

A couple weeks have passed and your relationship was very much still on the rocks. Apologizing helped to put a stop to your hurt but did nothing to mend the damage that was already done. Blatantly shown in the distance you kept.

An entirely new barrier went up between you. For all intents and purposes you moved into the guestroom. You'd be gone before he got up in the morning and in bed asleep before he even got home, even on days off. So affection and any room for proper communication were really off the table.

You were thoroughly guarded and while he kind of understood after so many ridiculous: It's over! Caught Red handed in wedding boutique with ex! headlines launched. He still hated every facet about it.

The new resentment from trying to explain the situation to family members, the total separation while under the same roof, the bullshit single word responses whenever he'd try and have a conversation through text when you actually were apart, or the way either of you didn't laugh together anymore. It was driving him absolutely mad.

He had talked to Anne and Gemma asking for advice on different occasions, pleading his case of how you wouldn't really speak to him, and they both managed to say the same thing: It's your fault!

Which wasn't necessarily wrong, but he needed an actual solution in order to fix what was happening. There wasn't much he could do with your jaded demeanor but he refused to give up. He had to do something to prove that he was still in this and not just to go through the motions.

Eventually Harry came up with the idea to extend an olive branch of sorts. To fix the parts that he had initially fucked up to show you that he is really going to change.

Today marked the start of one his biggest shows on the schedule. The first official televised live performance for the new album, and he couldn't think of a better moment to share. So he kind of purposely blocked you in the driveway the other night so that you'd have no choice but to talk to him in order to leave. And he didn't waste the opportunity to ask you to come hangout backstage before he went on for support.

As he suspected you'd been reluctant, especially given the last rehearsal that you attended, but overall you did agree and he was thrilled. But as time passed on up until the day of the show, that thrill shifted to excitement, and when the hours dwindled down to minutes before going on that excitement morphed into worry. He called twice earlier but received no answer. None of his team had received any sign of you arriving at the venue either. And as he walked through the curtain and onto the stage his hope was fully crushed.

****

Despite being able to force himself to go through the performance with a smile and all the bells and whistles. He couldn't withstand the facade of it any longer once the moment was over.

Other than disappointment he didnt know what to feel.

The band offered to go out to celebrate their phenomenal return and he politely refused. The urge to get an explanation consumed his every thought and was the highest of priorities at the moment.

So here he was pulling into your shared driveway at his earliest convenience. Noting the majority of lights on in the house and the unfamiliar vehicle parked out in front.

Inside the sound of your cheery voice alerted him instantly. Is this how you were normally when he wasn't around? And if nothing was really wrong then why didn't you show up or at least respond to his phone calls?

The answers to his inquisition come in the form of you sitting on the sofa, head tossed back in laughter nursing a glass of wine and you're not alone. At first glance he questions the random massive bloke in his home, but as Harry wanders closer he realizes the bloke isn't so random after all.

He'd seen him a zillion times in yearbooks and family photo albums and had even been introduced a few years ago. Since then every encounter with him had always been the same. Now Harry didn't like to use the word hate because it was really strong, but he absolutely hated Noah.

Anyone that knew Noah knew that he had a massive thing for you. They knew that he'd probably been pining for you from the moment that you met and at every opportunity given he'd try to weasel his way in.

Harry could admit to being unbearably pathetic when he was jealous, but Noah always managed to bring out the absolute worst in him by getting directly under his skin.

Above the borderline creepy and annoying core that made Noah... well Noah, was the exterior of layers that he put on and he put them on very well.

Not only did he get an insane amount of leverage for being your childhood bestfriend. Noah was charming and in a way that gave Harry a run for his money. Speaking of money Noah was rich and successful in that he owned his own company, that usually up until now kept him busy and away from you. In Harry's personal opinion, worst of all, Noah was devilishly handsome. Dark thick hair and brows over blue dreamy eyes and a strong chiseled jaw and cheeks that were neatly covered in hair that connected smoothly in which Harry could never attain himself. He couldn't even begin to get started on his physique. Noah had more muscles than Harry knew what to do with.

At the thought Harry could've sworn that he cut himself just from the tight grip that he had on his keys. The sharp sting pulling him out of his reverie.

"...sorry he's not usually like this it must of been one hell of a show...” Harry barely registers you addressing him or that he's been made out.

"Should be careful with that, didn't one of his band mates struggle with his hearing due to the high pitched little girls?" Noah adds and Harry's nerves are immediately irked.

"Noah, didn't know yeh were stopping by would've made proper arrangements if I had," Harry greets lacking any and all enthusiasm. Imagining barricading all the doors and windows just so he'd think no one was home and leave for good.

"Hopefully I'm not intruding. Work had me really swamped and I just thought I'd pull my head out of my ass for a moment to properly congratulate my friend. She works so hard, the least I could do is show my face,"

That stupid fucking face... Harry thought.

"Noe, you've already sent flowers and all that you don't have to explain anything to me I totally get it," you gently reassure and Harry finds himself aggressively rolling his eyes. The difference in your reaction is baffling to him.

"Of course I do." Noah's gaze narrows, but as he takes a sip he seems to remember something. "Mmm, I know it's not much, but I did bring some gifts. For the new office.." Placing his glass down he reaches towards the ground and retrieves a gift bag for you.

You open it absolutely giddy, "Oh my God Noe, this is so cute thank you!" You smile genuinely grateful for the personalized mouse pad; a picture of you two from graduation, a day that had truly changed everything for you both. Then a few inspirational plaques and framed art pieces to hang up.

Meanwhile Harry feels extremely out of place in his own home watching your face light up like fireworks on New Years. He also doesn't miss the smug side eye Noah gives. "I've got one just like it in my office too,"

When a smile to match graces Noah's face, Harry's hand begins to sting again. Fucking creep!

To his ultimate annoyance Noah isn't finished yet. Reaching in his pocket and revealing a black box too, "And...this is for the anniversary party, I know you'll find something perfect to go with it,"

Your eyes widen three times their size at the sight of from what Harry can see is expensive jewelry, "Noe this is, I- I can't accept this,"

"I'll be genuinely offended if you don't," he smiles openly smug this time, sitting back and swirling the wine in his glass. "I've had it revamped but it was my grandmother's. I promised her on her death bed that I would give it to someone special,"

Harry isn't suprised when you coo and thank him a little too much for his liking. But Noah's pretentious show almost made him miss the important part of what he just said. Slowly he puts two and two together, "Anniversary party? Your parent's?"

"Yeah it's this weekend, Noah's my date," You reply disinterested, eyes still glued to the gorgeous necklace Noah brought.

Harry isn't so sure where to begin with that information, but the lack of said information is a start. "I see, and where was my invitation?"

At his tone your gaze meets his and it's peeved to put it mildly. He had no such place but for the sake of your guest you play it cool, "I know you've got work to focus on so I thought I'd skip bothering you. Plus my parents love Noah,"

"It's probably for the best man, I can't imagine that you'd enjoy walking into the lion's den," Noah for some reason finds it appropriate to add teasingly.

Harry struggles to restrain his offense, "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Let's be honest, Y/N's family doesn't live under rocks. They're not very happy with you," Noah grimaces with a condescending shrug and sip of wine.

Harry is easily baited and enraged by his gall, "And how the hell would you know mate?"

Knowing that it normally takes quite a bit for Harry to get worked up, nonetheless to the extent of fighting, makes this situation all the more alarming. Noah hardly uttered two sentences and Harry was unnecessarily on edge. You literally step in before further escalation. Leaving your spot on the couch to somewhat drag Harry out of the room by the hand, "I don't know what the hell your problem is, but you need to relax."

"What's he even doing here?" He demands.

"What do you mean he's my best friend, why can't he visit?!" You whisper incredulous.

"Oh okay... so it's cool for yeh to do it but I can't have one bloody drink with mine without yeh making a fucking scene for the world to see? Got it." He sneers.

Harry's clearly baiting you into an arguement and you nearly fall for it until you realize that Noah would hear everything you're saying. So instead you opt out, "I'm not going there with you right now. Go take a shower or do some fucking yoga and we'll talk about it later."

At your dismissal Harry scoffs and shakes his head disappointed. Surprisingly he relents, roughly brushing past you and heading to the bedroom, "Right, whenever that is."

****

It didn't feel right to have Noah stick around after that embarrassing exchange. So you apologetically promise to reschedule and thankfully Noah didn't seem too bothered by it. Squeezing you goodbye and offering that you call if you needed anything. Which low key meant brute force for Harry.

Rooms away Harry had to actively pretend like he couldn't hear you and Noah laughing. He wanted to drain the noise out by getting in the shower but he didn't trust Noah enough.

His nerves were on a distinct edge until he heard farewells exchanged and the front door finally closed behind him. But they teeter off once you grace him with your presence because he's wildly upset. You enter stoically and sit criss crossed on the edge of the bed. Watching him flutter about stripping down and collecting things for a shower.

"So you're family doesn't like me now? That's great." He retorts flustered tugging his shirt by the hem and pulling it over his head.

Harry seems to do his best putting on this angry front, but you know better than anyone that he's really just hurt about your parents. Usually he was enamored with them and vice versa so to find out that they didn't invite him really cut deep.

With that in mind you try to cut him some slack, bracing yourself for his misdirected frustration, "They're just not happy with you, huge difference,"

Indignant he turns to glare at you, "Same difference actually and what the hell happened to yeh today?"

"He just showed up when I was on my way out, and I couldn't just leave it felt rude. Plus I hardly get to see him because of our schedules,"

Harry bit his tongue to refrain from arguing that you obviously had been in contact when Noah sent flowers. Instead choosing to focus on issues of today, "And yeh couldn't call me back?"

"Again it felt rude to interrupt him just for that. I thought I'd have more time to-"

"Just for that? Yeh don't think it was rude to leave me hanging and checking non stop for you to show up?" Harry suddenly snaps.

Which is annoying but you couldn't entirely fault him for it, since you'd been in his shoes and knew all too well exactly where he was coming from. Today's show was a huge deal and you missed it, point blank. So you honestly admit, "Yes I do think it's rude given I know exactly how that feels, but I didn't do it on purpose. Sorry," You're met with silence as he simply shakes his head and turns his back to you, unbuckling his belt and unbuttoning his jeans. Pure curiosity makes you push the envelope, "I guess it's a bad idea to ask how it went?"

He scoffs pushing them down his legs, "When I feel let down and disappointed, yeah."

This conversation was going nowhere and fast, "Okay then... Never mind." You give up and head towards the door.

But he apparently isn't finished, "Were yeh even gonna tell me about your parents anniversary party?"

"Yes," you confess, crossing your arms and lean against the doorframe.

Gruntled disbelief consumes his features as he tosses his worn clothes into the hamper, "Really? Cos' yeh already made plans with Noah without consulting me,"

"I only did it for you! They're upset Harry, do you really want to be on the opposing end of cold shoulders and side eyes? Not just by them, but by my aunts and uncles and cousins too!"

"Can't believe yeh told them in the first place," he mutters not so under his breath wandering into the closet not really knowing what he was looking for.

His blame game was beginning to piss you off now, "Did you forget that they were there with me? I didn't have to say anything, and they read blogs and comments like everyone else. What did you expect?"

On that note, in true stubborn Harry fashion he avoids addressing the problem anymore and in the process jumps the gun, "It's fine— it's fine, I'll fix it. I'll just get them a really great gift for the party and-"

"You shouldn't go, it's not a good idea," you quickly protest. Knowing how fast the party would become a shit show specifically on his behalf.

Though of course he's not thinking that way. Wholly offended he concludes, "I shouldn't go or yeh don't want me to?"

"Both," You admit and it makes Harry immediately see red.

"Why? Cos' yeh rather show off Noah and how great he's always been to yeh?" He seethes.

"No, because if you go it's just gonna draw unnecessary attention and I really don't want to deal with that," You argue.

”So how am I supposed to fix it then?" He deadpans in a tone so cynical you're not quite sure if his question is rhetorical.

"I don't know, just send the gift with me and I'll-"

For some reason your solution sets him off, "Do yeh not realize how incredibly insincere that is? I'm not some bloody coward that can't own up to mistakes and needs yeh to fight my battles for me!" He shouts.

Forcing you to yell back, "I know that! But there's a time and place for everything and their party isn't it. If anything it's better to just start with a peace offering,"

He rolls his eyes and suddenly deems it appropriate to remove his boxers and throw them in the hamper as well, "Didn't know we're at fucking war,"

"Well they're my family they care a lot," You sigh averting your gaze defeatedly, feeling an all too familiar dismissal coming on. After all, how long was he going to stand around naked? But just before you grant him some privacy and leave you decide to beat him to the punch.

"You should be worried if they didn't."

****

Secluded a little less than an hour later in the guest room, Harry knocks on the door. Peering in hesitantly once you call for him to come in. You're in the middle of coordinating your outfit for work tomorrow so you don't initially catch his newly calm mood.

Only offering a rather cold and distracted, "What do you want?"

Harry lingers in the doorway not really sure what to do with himself, "Em... To say goodnight... and apologize,"

Your expression is nothing short of skeptical when you inevitably turn to look at him, "For what?"

Harry's terrible posture deflates even more after releasing a forlorn sigh, "For being a shit person,"

"I'm listening," You goad unsatisfied with just that.

Harry anxiously scratches his temple, "S'not an excuse but I guess my feelings were hurt. One thing after another and it just felt like it was all on purpose. And well... I did what I did and said what I said,”

He was right there wasn't an excuse, but you could respect his honesty. So you grant him permission to sit on the unoccupied side of the bed and reward him with some of your own, "Even if I wanted to get back at you it wouldn't be like this. I know how much you love my parents and how much Noah bothers you— for whatever reason. If I was just going to play games of who could hurt who more, I wouldn't even be here,"

Relieved to hear that, Harry feels safe enough to indulge more of where he was coming from, "I know, I just... I don't know he's got the muscles, the company, and he's got that cool macho beard and mustache thing going on. Yeh always call mine a crustashe!" You laugh at that but do genuinely appreciate the candid insight.

For his comfort you sit beside him, "Because I prefer you fresh faced, I like that you're adorable and wholesome looking!"

Harry smiles and his dimples pop but it still doesn't quite meet his eyes, "He's already done things for yeh that I never did,"

"Like what?" You drill curious.

"Getting yeh cool stuff to decorate you're office...and I haven't even seen it," he gestures sullenly toward the paintings leaning against the wall.

Now he was being ridiculous, "Harry it's literally just a room with a desk and computer. And it's stuff I can easily buy myself,"

Still he sulks, and eventually you realize that this is meant to be more of an overdue explanation rather than a episode of debunking his worst fears. So you let him continue.

"I never told yeh, how proud I am. Yeh were hurting and I should've said it then, cos' it was the least I could've done. But I was so set on waiting for that perfect moment and wanting it to feel organic, but then everything happened and I thought it might come off like I was obligated to. So I thought it would be better if I didn't say anything at all, and it was the complete opposite,"

You couldn't begin to describe how much this clarification meant to you. For so long it's all you wanted. Why couldn't he just say that?

"Well what's stopping you now?" Optimistic you nudge his shoulder with your own, "I thought we established a long time ago simplicity goes a long way,”

For the first time since he entered this room he looks you properly in the eye. He almost looks scared. Biting down on his bottom lip he carefully reaches for your hands, in which you allow him to hold firmly. He takes a deep breath before speaking, "Y/N, I am deeply honored to have someone like you to be a reflection of me out there. I love your ambitious, go getter, never say quit attitude, and I couldn't ask for a better inspiration that makes me want to be the best I've ever been everyday,"

Flattered your eyebrows raise to nearly meet your hairline, "Wow... Yeah if you had said that then it would have probably saved us some trouble down the road. Definitely didn't enjoy having an existential crisis thinking you were ashamed of me."

"What?" His face drops in unfiltered horror, "Love no I- .. I'm such a dipshit! I'm so sorry!"

Looking back now after getting his side of it you can't help but feel like you overreacted. It was honestly embarrassing, but knowing that there is no way to change the past you shrug halfheartedly, "I mean better late than never though,"

Harry looks at you as if you have three heads and shakes his, "Please stop being so forgiving, you're making me angry at myself all over again,"

You squeeze his hands this time, "Well don't be, I don't want to be angry with you anymore. You already apologized for it we're supposed to move on,"

Not so easily swayed Harry pulls his own hands free. In fact he feels so completely undeserving to even be in your presence he stands from the bed. "Yeah but your feelings are real, they matter and I was a proper cunt. I see why yeh wanted to leave,"

You were glad that he was finally seeing things from a different perspective but you didn't want him to beat himself up either. Harry didn't have to invite you to his show but he did; and he didn't have to come in here and explain himself but he did and the effort was greatly appreciated.

"You're getting better," you reassure.

Harry sighs unconvinced, "I need to be," Hating that he wasted enough of your time as it was, he decides to call it night. Obviously you had better things to do than deal with his shit, "G'night, I love you,"

Even though you're confused by his sudden departure you don't stop him, "Night, I love you too," assuming that maybe he just really needed some time to think for himself. You just hoped that he wouldn't over do it.

Before he closes the door behind himself you call, "Hey! Don't stress about my parents either, they'll come around eventually. Especially if you get them a good gift that we both can cosign,”

He scoffs at the unattainable idea, "Yeah but what?"

You shrug whimsically, glad to give him something productive to think about. Also hoping that a vote of confidence would go a long way, "I don't know, I'm sure you'll think of something."

****

For once you didn't mind that work kept both you and Harry occupied. While he was away out of town you hoped that the distraction would level him out and bring him to his senses.

It wasn't lost on you how irrational he'd get whenever Noah came around. Harry was undeniably jealous and it was cute until it wasn't.

While you appreciated the more frequent phone calls and the sincere declarations of love at the end of them. You detested that they mostly happened to be when you were out and about with Noah. During shared lunches and dinners over plans of the anniversary party. Even the initial improvement of thoughtful 'just checking in' face time calls gradually became interrogations of your whereabouts to see if Noah was around. At it's worst when he found out you started working out together.

Nope take that back!

The absolute worst was when he called you in the middle of a Netflix marathon, cozy and clad in pajamas together on the couch. Harry had a full out meltdown threatening to come home in that instant. It was too much.

Noah definitely is a catch. Funny, smart, and so beautifully made it's annoying. But he wasn't what you wanted, nonetheless your type. He was like a brother to you. It was astounding that the person that actually knew you the best didn't realize that.

On the other hand, you mentally took note of the mirror effect. With Noah around Harry strangely didn't have time for Kendall. As a byproduct, partying and drinking had also fallen completely off the agenda. Although you figured that might also have something to do with his touring regimen, it was definitely an improvement either way.

Ultimately though, today couldn't have come fast enough. You yourself for the most part had been dodging family criticism and now it was time to face the music.

Noah, ever the strategist, made sure you arrived at the perfect time. Not too early, not too late, but just the right time where greetings were already issued and the festivities were beginning so everyone would be too distracted to notice your presence.

Though when they did Noah was sweet enough to avert the subject, keeping it totally at a surface level. That is until you run into the countriest auntie of all time. Also the worst gossip in the entire family. Clearly there was no courtyard big enough for her not to find you like a heat seeking missile.

"Noah honey, I didn't think we'd be seeing you again! Especially after that rock star hmm," You get playfully elbowed and can't help rolling your eyes, "Oh Y/N baby, don't be embarrassed it happens to the best of us! Mine was a marine that couldn't keep it in his pants to save his life! Shame ya didn't at least make it to the prenuptial though. His alimony would've changed your life," She fans herself at the thought utterly oblivious to her lack of tact, "But you and Noah have always been two peas in a pod so no love lost. Y'all belong together anyway!" She smiles knowingly.

Just when you think she's done pushing boundaries she opens her mouth again with a cunning look in her eyes, "Speaking of, Noah.. Times a ticking! When are you gone' make a honest little lady out of our Y/N?"

You look to Noah with stunned wide eyes, unconditionally embarrassed that he was being put through the wringer like this. You silently mouth, "I'm so sorry!"

And yet he simply chuckles sharing one of his charming butterfly conjuring smiles with her before focusing on you, "Whenever she's ready,"

Your aunty awes and coos while you stare at him amazed, he played it so cool sometimes it made you wonder...

****

As the sun went down everyone was gathered at tables to view a slideshow of memories on a projector screen. But just before playing it your parents decide to open their gifts.

Obviously you go first, unveiling an antique wind chime and matching custom pottery vases for future garden parties. In which they love since they were expanding their yard. As a matter of fact they talked your ear off about nothing but gardening whenever you spoke most of the time. So your gifts are perfect.

Noah goes next since he's your guest and reveals two all expense paid cruise line tickets to Hawaii and front row complete season passes to see the Golden State Warriors. When your dad can't pick his jaw up off the table, your mom actually jumps out of her seat to hug him, making everyone laugh. "I don't care what anyone says, you're my son in law!"

Your laughter immediately stops though. You understand that she is excited but that was taken entirely too far and way out of line. Comments like that weren't fair to any one of you.

For the first time ever you began to regret bringing Noah. It was weird, and it honestly wasn't his fault. Since you never really corrected anyone about your current status. But once the feeling of betrayal set in so did the guilt and it really didn't feel right being here without Harry.

You end up standing to excuse yourself for the evening but loud commotion in the distance halts you in place. It sounds like construction, and grows louder and louder as a side entrance to the courtyard is opened by staff members and in comes an entire forklift truck.

"Um, excuse me! What is going on here?" Your mom bristles completely appalled at their timing considering they haven't even got to the slideshow yet.

The driver proceeds take what looks like another massive table to the platform beside the actual projector and effortlessly lowers it to the ground. By then your father gets up for your mother's sake, trying to get his attention but to no avail. He drives off and everyone is left utterly confused.

"I'll go see what's happening," Noah reassures you standing up too.

But before he can leave the table an all too familiar voice calls out, "Sorry I'm late, I couldn't wrap this one but I just had to bring it along!"

Harry's here dressed in a nice suit and he's not alone.

"Oh... my God," you gasp.

Strolling in behind him were a couple of the venue staff members with items in hand. Though more importantly stood right beside him is none other than Elton freaking John! In a signature over the top flashy suit you couldn't begin to describe. He makes his way over to what the forklift driver dropped off, to reveal a grand piano from under a thick white cloth. The staff were evidently there to set up the microphone and speakers.

Harry continues speaking gaining everyone's attention again, "A little birdy once told me, that a pair of teenagers met at a skating rink in 1974, and when they heard a certain song they fell in love and have been ever since. Fast forward 47 years later and that song still creates the same magic on this day every year. Magic that I think we all hope to have," he announces and for a moment his eyes hold yours full of intensity. "Hopefully that magic makes today even more special. Ladies and gentlemen I give you Elton John and this is Bennie and the Jets!" Harry bows out with exaggerated extended arms excusing himself.

Your parents are still stood there frozen in shock until the opening keys are played and everyone else starts clapping along to help with the beat. Eventually your dad takes the lead and they fall into the rhythm, swaying to the music while everyone gathers round to watch.

At the sight of your parents on the make shift dance floor, the smile on your face was not only outright painful from doing it so hard but watery too. You couldn't believe that he did this— that he remembered! You told him that story once while you were drunk off your ass, when you first started dating.

It's almost funny because you've always wanted a cheesy but kind of romantic Rom-Com moment and now you finally got one and it's absolutely surreal.

Harry playfully clears his throat somehow suddenly behind you, and he's got a mischievous gleam in his eyes, "Not to ruin the moment but can I have this dance?"

An emotional mess, you nod and allow him to lead you to the area where everyone is dancing now. Relief also swarms you when as you pass through the crowd of family members, Harry is celebrated in pats on the shoulder and appproving nods. Surprisingly started by your obnoxious auntie.

It could be the other gazes on you or maybe just Harry's, but your stomach is pumped to the max with giddy butterflies. This is all you ever wanted, Harry with you and all in during the important moments.

Once he pulls you in close you never want him to let go.

****

By the end of the night everyone is tired out from dancing and all too happy to say their goodbyes.

The time spent today socializing is more than enough to last you a lifetime. Now you were content to squeeze back into your little bubble of life. Harry has a private heart to heart conversation with your parents while you collect your things.

Back at the table you jolt at the reminder of Noah. Who completely slipped your mind once Harry swept you off your feet so unexpectedly.

Since he did drive you here it was only fair to let him know you'd be going home with Harry instead. Though when you find him at a table with some boisterous uncles, sitting down with his head resting on the table, he's drunk beyond all recognition.

In all good conscience you couldn't leave him like this, he certainly wouldn't leave you.

"Noe, you wanna crash at mine so you can sleep this off?" In response he mumbles something unintelligible and so you just take it as a yes anyway.

To your dismay, Harry wasn't too happy about it when he recieved the news. Complaining the whole time you both struggled to load Noah into his back seat. Mostly worried that Noah was going to puke in the car on the way there. But thankfully there was no such case.

When arriving home and with one arm draped over your shoulder, you heave Noah's drunken dead weight into the guest room. Which meant for the first time in weeks you would have to sleep with Harry.

Noah groans as you roll him onto his back on the bed. Making sure that he was centered enough so that he wouldn't fall off. "Don' leave me,"

"I'm not going anywhere I'll just be in the other room okay?" you promise, thoroughly amused. Noah wasn't one to let himself get this sloppy since college.

"S'not what I mean..." He swallows hard, barely able to peek through his heavily lidded eyes.

Simultaneously scared that he might throw up and of what he might say next, you get up and close the door quickly. Definitely not needing Harry as an audience if he said something wild.

He seems to understand and waits until you come back to speak, "I meant what I said before. If this doesn't work out for you I will always be here. You know that right? Single, taken, abducted by aliens, or whatever you just say the word,"

You exhale heavily through your nose hoping that's just the liquor talking, "Trust me, if this doesn't work out I'll be knocking your door down," you tease laughing but he doesn't. Instead his glossy eyes seem to search yours for something that just isn't quite there.

It's uncomfortably quiet for a minute too long so you decide to just leave. Noah's adorable droopy eyes follow you all the way to the door before he speaks again. A hoarse but sincere, "I love you Y/N,” leaving his lips.

Frozen in place you say the only thing that felt right in that moment, ”I know. Goodnight."

After leaving his room your nerves came out to play and it honestly had nothing to do with what just happened. But more so at the fact that you and Harry would be sharing a bed.

The lights were still on when you entered the room and Harry was topless already in bed. Sitting up against against the headboard patiently waiting for you.

"Alright?" He asks with a quirked brow. Gaze following you around concerned as you undress, switching into a tank top and shorts.

"I think so," you honestly reply finally removing your gifted necklace and placing it on your nightstand before slowly climbing in bed.

His warmth underneath the blankets naturally made you gravitate towards him. Thus why you started sleeping in the guest room in the first place. When you turned to lay on your side Harry didn't miss a beat sliding in behind you into your preferred big spoon position.

You could feel it as Harry took a deep relieved breath, "I'm so glad that I didn't listen to yeh,"

Amused you snort, "Me too," and snuggle into him more, "Talk about an ace in the hole... I'm pretty sure my parents love you more than me now,"

"No arguements here," Harry teases but also gives a loving squeeze, "Doesn't matter though, I'm gonna love yeh more anyway," He promises, pressing his soft lips to the exposed skin on the back of your shoulder sending chills down your spine. The contact easily making your pulse race so fast you swear you could hear it. And without any signs of protest Harry continues to press one after another and another...

He's far too amped and too aware to sleep right now and honestly so are you.

Harry's at peace with just having you in his arms again but that doesn't stop him from wanting more. Before you know it you are twisted around to face him and his lips are desperately searching for yours.

God you missed this!

The intensity makes your stomach drop off an endless cliff and your skin singes at every point of contact. Your bare thigh hinged on his hip, his hand grasping fervently at your back to get you closer, all the while your hands tangle in his hair not feeling close enough either. You don't even separate to breathe.

It's not long before that yearning and urgency of desire takes control.

Your kisses growing more heated, when his tongue coerces yours into a sweet dance you knew all too well. Unabashedly ravenous you roll onto your back and pull him on top of you. Craving to be stupendously enraptured by him.

Harry has never needed you more than in this moment and yet something in his subconscious will not let him enjoy this. Perhaps the small voice in the back of his mind worried that this was only temporary. Afraid that you would go back to basically being roommates instead of lovers.

The more he thought about it, the more he couldn't bear it.

So risking it all he parts from you, hovering just enough to see you properly. Almost in reflex you reach out to continue where you left off but he stubbornly resists. He needed to know where you stood. Breathless he asks, "Can we just.. start over?"

Confused you pant out, "What?"

He sighs laying it all out on the table, "I mean like really start over, I'm tired of being at odds with yeh. I miss yeh, I love yeh and I just want to make up already,"

Despite his horribly timed interruption you can't help but laugh. This entire time you thought you already had. But you do appreciate his push for verbal confirmation and decide to rib him a bit, "Maybe,"

Unfortunately his expression is hopelessy incredulous not catching on to your joke, "Maybe? What's stopping yeh? Tell me exactly what I have to do to-" you lean up and interrupt him with a languid kiss.

Your teeth tug playfully at his bottom lip until it snaps back into place and your restless hands delve into his boxers, grabbing on and squeezing him tight enough to make him shudder from head to toe, "I'd rather show you."

If it weren't for the painful strain in his arms from holding himself up during that. Harry would've sworn that he was dreaming.

****

Harry had an axe to grind and he wanted everyone in the vicinity to know it. How loud you both were last night and early this morning did just the job. Putting him in greatest of moods because all finally felt right in the world. Like a demon had been exorcised. Although in reality the actual demon was knocked out on top of him. Drooling like a grizzly while still maintaining the appearance of an angel.

Once stealthily peeling you off, he quietly went to the kitchen to get a headstart on breakfast in a daze. Reflecting on his favorite moments.

Sex and making love with you was one thing but make up sex blew everything out of the water. It just hit different.

The passion was on another level entirely, God the scratching, biting, squeezing, screaming and down right rabid carnal—

"Fuck!"

"Holy shit!"

Both Harry and Noah startle at the unexpected sight of each other in the hall. Harry rubs his chest to soothe the coronary he almost had, and Noah drops his hand mid turn of the front door doorknob suddenly hesitant in making his hasty exit.

Harry couldn't be happier to see him leave, sublty flauting his semi nudity. He smirks proudly, "Not staying for breakfast?"

"Uhh no, I've got to get back to work," Noah replies sheepishly, scratching the back of his his neck clearly uncomfortable.

It takes everything for Harry to resist the urge to gloat and he shamelessly fails, "Are yeh sure? Yeh look exhausted mate, did-.... did we keep you up last night?" Harry feigns embarrassment though internally he's pointing and laughing like a spiteful child, "I'm so sorry mate, it was the built up tension and frustration and just finally touching base, we had to channel it into-"

The more Harry spoke the more disgusted and enraged Noah became, "You know just because you hooked up, doesn't mean this is over. You'll blow it again eventually and she'll come to her senses. And when she does, I'll be there to pick up all the pieces. We'll see who's laughing then."

Harry knew that he didn't like Noah for a reason, and as he anticipated his true colors finally came out.

But he's not at all worried. In fact, it makes Harry smile a genuine shit eating smile. Because if there's anything in this entire world that he's sure of it's your love for each other and he would die before he allowed anything or anyone come between that.

Harry replies extremely enthusiastic, "We all have shit dreams at some point mate. Did you know, I wanted to be a baker?"

At that Noah outwardly can't handle it anymore and heads out with a firm slam of the door. In which Harry locks and laughs to himself almost madly. He couldn't believe it.

****

When you woke up and looked at Harry with stars in your eyes today, Noah's revelation and all the other drama of yesterday, had practically become a thing of the past and Harry didn't mind keeping it that way.

Especially when he got to sweep his arms around you from behind and steal some neck kisses while you filled a mug with coffee. Humming along in satisfaction. His heart swelled at the sight of your engagement ring back on your finger while you stirred in your sugar.

He couldn't remember being this happy in years and he prayed that it would last in the following.

[forever-yoongis]

My Chemistry Of Love

Ships: Yoongi x reader, Namjoon x reader, Jungkook x reader.

Genre: Fluff and angst.

This takes place BEFORE Sophie breaks up with Namjoon :(. Y'all will get a better idea when I make a masterlist of all my fics.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

"Well ain't this just fUn? ", Namjoon grumbles underneath his breath and Sophie giggles at that. " Well you KNEW this would happen right? What's the point in complaining now?" She pats his head lightly.

So basically, everyone in BTS apparently wanted to know the girl for whom their leader was just so whipped, and it pretty much ended in an invasion of poor Sophie's house one random evening which otherwise would've been spent peacefully with Ann and Exci. It was a day off for everyone.

"Jeez but I never expected this", Namjoon raises his voice slightly, casting a glare at the younger members, especially Jungkook and Taehyung who were currently ravaging the flat, blasting music and screaming " Why's this place so small? Sophie how do you fit??! "

"That is actually very rude", J-Hope interjects, flashing a huge grin and starts dancing to the music when he hits against the coffee table and flips it over. " Oof gukkie, I guess you're right," He says sheepishly rubbing his forehead.

"Could you guys like, stop insulting my girlfriend like that? " Namjoon groans. "I didn't ask y'all to come. " "So you're basically kicking us out hyung? " Jimin flashes his puppy sad eyes at the leader who sighs.

"Well at least my baby is not bothering anyone~" Ann cooes from the corner of the room where she sat in front a couch where Min Yoongi lay, well, sleeping and occasionally murmuring gibberish of having lamb skewers with her at 2am. Sophie laughs and replies, "don't worry, Exci's gon clean this all up after you leave".

"HEYY that's just wrong! ", Exci protests vehemently from the floor where she sat with her legs crossed observing the maknaes. " I won't be doing ANYTHING at all. This losers will clean up after themselves, I'll make sure of that", she points at Jungkook who was currently stuffing his mouth with some snacks he came across in the kitchen. "Whawt-mm-di-mm-I-do? " Jungkook speaks while chewing spilling food from his mouth at which Jin screams, "STOP THAT THIS VERY INSTANT. THIS IS NOT HOW I RAISED YOU". " Oof-momma, no need to get that triggered", Tae pats his hyung's back grinning.

"Well guys how bout we do something constructive instead? " Jungkook flips up his head at that. "You mean Overwatch? Sophie do you have Overwatch??" "Kook, don't interrupt me while--"

"Yeah I think I do", Sophie smiles at the maknae who flashes her a wide smile. " Excellent you're the best", and he jumped on the sofa waking up Yoongi in the process who started cursing at the younger member. Jungkook shuts up immediately and looks sheepishly at the annoyed hyung who was probably going to potentially murder him for interrupting his nap. But before things took a turn for the worse, Ann interrupts, "Yoongs how bout you keep your head in my lap and sleep? ",she says smiling at him. He gives one last glare at the maknae and slips off the couch laying his head on her lap, curled on the floor. ;-;

"Aw before things start getting cheesy here, let's do this game", Taehyung jumps on the sofa next to Jungkook and then looks at Exci who was sitting by herself on the floor. " You wanna join? " He wiggles his eyebrows excitedly at which she murmurs, "don't make it sound so weird, I'm coming", and makes her way slowly to the sofa.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

*Time skip an hour or two*

"Well isn't it just unfair that you three (or five staring at Ann in the corner who was contentedly threading her fingers through her boyfriend's hair as he slept) get to have all the fun? " Sophie complains as Jungkook once again screams, "YES I WIN" for probably the tenth time that day, or hundred, it doesn't really matter. But he ignores her blatantly and keeps on playing. Sophie sighs and looks at Namjoon who shrugs. "Can't we all do something together? " She suggests, at which Exci and Tae looks up. "Like? "

"Idk truth or dare? Situations? Memories? Anything really", Sophie murmurs and closes her eyes resting her back against Namjoon's chest who presses her kiss to her cheek.

"Well I'm up for it", Exci says and slips off the sofa. Taehyung starts stroking his chin, pretending to be in deep thought. " I think I might likey this idea too. Plus, this has gotten boring, Jungkook wins every time", and he throws the game control on the sofa and joins Exci. Jungkook complains loudly, "hey that's not fair you two. You all are just unworthy, accept it!" But seeing that he has no option, he joins the group on the floor, sitting cross- legged. "Ann would you joi-" Sophie begins, and then she notices that even Ann had fallen asleep resting her head on the lower part of the sofa.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

After almost an hour of truth and dare of an extremely violent kind, coz Jin kept slapping Jimin whenever he came up with a lewd dare which ranged from "asking Sophie to make out with Namjoon to asking Hobi to lick Jin's face (which gained him an extra few glares of course)"... Taehyung decided that it was time to spice things up a lil bit. Which ofc wasn't exactly a brilliant idea. Or maybe it was. Who knows?

"I dare you", stretching out his words as he pointed a finger at Exci who raised her eyebrow skeptically, " to sit on Jungkook's lap", and he pointed his other hand towards Jungkook, then immediately burst into a fit of giggles. Exci burnt a deep red with anger and so did Jungkook, who was more shy than mad. Realising the imminent danger to Taehyung's life for if looks could kill, he would have burnt into a crisp by now, the BTS leader stepped in. "Okay guys, break! Break! We need a break". Waving his hands clumsily, "lets do something else, yeah?" --- his eyes flitting back and forth between Tae and Sophie, silently trying to gain her support. "Yeah of course..." she mumbled, then clearing her throat, "am I right Ann?" Blushing a deep red when she remembered that she was actually asleep, she stuttered, "I-I meant Exci, yeah".

"We could play our old game of making situations".

Heads snapped towards the direction the voice came from, and Sophie's eyes widened as she saw a very smug-looking Ann staring back with a lazy smirk on her face, her hands threading through Yoongi's hands who was still sleeping very soundly, letting out smol snores now and thenxD.

"What?" She raised her eyebrows, "isn't that an excellent idea? I thought you two would be applauding me by now".

"A-are you sure? Uhh..." Sophie got taken in by surprise at the sudden suggestion by her friend. "What's this game all about anyways", spoke up a curious Jimin who was always ready to jump at any juicy proposal brought up. "The rules are simple really", Ann stated twirling a strand of Yoongi's hair about her finger. "Ann--", Exci warned but like always, Ann would ignore her every warning completely. I mean, who gives up a chance to spice stuff a lil?

"Look, this game was sort of inspired from the original 'Truth, Dare and Situation' that we all know of. You'll be given a situation of any kind, and you've got to think of a way to handle it. You might be asked to show how you'd react, or reply or act accordingly..."

"The only change in our modified rules is that, you'll only be given romantic or rather, embarrassingly juicy situations and you've gotta come out of those. This is like one of those otome simulation games that many play, only we will be the ones to make them up. Which means,you can also introduce multiple... suitors...in this game," Ann concluded triumphantly, "this game was an absolute favourite of ours back in highschool", she winked at Exci who turned beet-red.

"Lovely!" Taehyung clapped his hands, rubbing his palms together. Jimin was equally thrilled and Jin merely sighed with a "kids these days..."

"Look I've got no problem, as long you always pair me up with Sophie in the situations," Namjoon smiled, looping a hand through Sophie's, who nodded in agreement.

"Hopeless romantics", Ann sighed.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

"Noo ofc I won't choose him!! I WON'T!", Exci started waving her hands frantically about her and furiously shook her head in disagreement. "B-but", Jin sputtered, "I made such a romantic scene..."

"...and oH so tragic", Hobi clutches at his heart and pretends to sob. "Still a NO", she shook her head. Jimin intervened. "I TOLD you that she needed smut. That's why she isn't saying yes..Hyung, you really know nothing about relationships these days..." he leans against the wall.

"Yeah do whatever, just stop pairing me with her. It's weird", Jungkook sighs, putting a hand on his forehead. "I won't do half the stuff that you're making me do in the situation".

"Oh but you will, when you're in love", Taehyung jabbed a finger at him.

By now, almost everyone's gotten a situation of their own, and almost everyone had said yes to their partner in the end. What with Jin's romantic sprinklings, Ann's juicy scenes and Hoseok's tragic angst, it was hard not to. But it was only Exci who hadn't said yes even once, but she had been paired with Jungkook every.single.time. And the real Jungkook was tired of listening to the fictional him jumping in front of cars, bridges and whatnot for saving her. "Why do you need so much of saving, huh?" He rolled his eyes.

Exci exclaimed, " I wouldn't have crossed a busy road in the first place. Jin's an idiot". "Yahh, who are you calling that?", came Jin's threatening voice. "Exci's heart is icy ", Hobi pretended to shiver. "Don't even remind me", Ann intervened. "It was just so damn hard to make her say yes. She might be the most clichéd person you've met, but trust me, I'd be awake at night thinking of all kinds of ghastly situations that would make her say yes to the poor guy".

"Hey, I did say yes sometimes! Remember that ones you made on Chaol and Tomoe?" Exci tried to defend herself. "Who's Chaol?" Jungkook pipes up, suddenly. Ann gives him a 'Really now?' look and said, "Yeah yeah I made a lot of stuff".

"So did I", Exci says smugly. "There was Hak and Zen, Yuri and Zero..." She counts the names off her fingers. "...Usui and Newt, Laurie and Jason", Sophie ends in a flourish. "Ooh Ann, so many!", Hobi exclaims in surprise. "Continue you both", Jimin says in a serious tone, "Yoongi needs a report on this", he pretends to take down names on an imaginary notepad. "Yah stop you both", Ann exclaims, crossing her arms defensively. "This was almost a decade ago!"

"There were more, I think", Sophie pretends to tap her chin, as if deep in thought. "You will stop right there sweet, if you don't want me to mention our good ol' 'Percy' ", Ann chuckled, putting air quotes around the name with her fingers.

Sophie's eyes widened in alarm, her eyes darting side to side, thinking of what to say. "Who's Percy?", Namjoon turned to her sharply. "N-none that you should be worried about Joonie!", Sophie exclaims waving her hands in front of her defensively. "Just some age-old crush I had in highschool". Namjoon visibly relaxed at her words, shaking his head a little for getting so worked up over such a silly matter. Sophie glared at Ann, who giggled in response. "Sure sure, whatever floats your boat", Ann muttered smirking.

Eager to avert the topic, Jin comments, "Exci, I really like those earrings of yours. Where did you buy them?", he asks quickly. Exci looked a bit taken abackby the sudden question and her fingers automatically goes upto her ears, caressing them. A thoughtful look takes over her face as she seemed to struggle to remember. "Ah these? I don't exactly recall, but I've had them for a long time now. Was a gift from a dear friend, I think". She stopped for a while, her hands still on the earrings, as if holding them might trigger her lost memories. "It was a girl....no, a boy...", she squints, trying to recall. "A party....a birthday party....and rabbits?" She shakes her head. "It's no use, I've the memory of a goldfish haha. I don't even remember his face, but we were very small, like in primary school. Before we met", she nodded at her two friends, Sophie and Ann. "I faintly remember someone crying...was it me? But what does it have to do with a earring..." she trails off, " a kids' park... with swings and a slide..." " We used to live in a different area back then. I remember staying there for a couple of years only before we moved".

A sudden sound of a chair scraping against the floor makes Exci snap her head towards the source. Jungkook quickly gets up from his place on the floor near the chair, a strange expression on his face. "M-my leg had fallen asleep, I'm not used to sitting down for so long", he quickly says, moving his face away, as if hiding something. He looked weirdly restless as if something was bothering him a lot. "You can continue...I need a drink". Rubbing the back of his neck with his hand, he slowly moved towards the corridor. "Kitchen's that way, right?" Sophie nodded, a confused expression on her face. She looks at Namjoon who merely shrugs in response. Exci stares intently at Jungkook, her brows furrowed as if trying to grasp a lost detail. Taehyung gets up suddenly and says, "yeah Hyung, I feel stiff too. I'll go with him, we'll be back soon". Putting his large hand on Jungkook's shoulder, he slowly leads him out to the kitchen. Jin, annoyed at all the interuption waves them away, "yeah, yeah you all can go. You can continue though."

Why's he so interested in my story anyway? Thinks Exci, as she looks at Jungkook, who disappears into the kitchen. Sophie looks quizzically at Ann, who merely shrugs in response, her fingers busy threading through Yoongi's hair, who by now was letting out soft snores and occasionally mumbling something incoherent about 'adding a lil more salt to his lamb skewers'. Ann chuckled at that, shaking her head muttering something about how adorable he is when he sleeps. "So? You were saying..." Jin eggs Exci on to continue with her story, throwing a meaningful look at Taehyung who returned it as he too disappeared into the kitchen.

"Yeah, yeah...it was a boy, I think. Small cute doe-shaped eyes", Exci laughs embarrassedly, "I don't know why I suddenly remembered that haha". "But the memory's so hazy...", she throws her head back, resting it against the sofa and stretches her legs on the floor. Closing her eyes, as if trying hard to remember, she asks, "are you really that curious?" "Yeah, I guess so... I mean, there's nothing much interesting to discuss about", Jin replies quickly. "Hmmm I guess so...", Exci continues to think with her eyelids closed. "A birthday party...whose? Mine? Or somebody else's? I remember crying over something a lot... And...well, a contest??" Exci opens her eyes, "I have the memory of a goldfish haha. It's difficult for me to remember much from the old days".

"A contest?", Ann chimed in curiously. "That reminds me how competitive you used to be when it came to singing contests in our school. As a kid, I used to steer right clear of you and your craziness", she laughed. "Yeah, I kinda remember all that", Sophie giggled from her place beside Namjoon who had one of his arms around her waist, her head resting on his chest, aka being all lovey-dovey. "Oh would you two please get a room?", Jimin rolled his eyes at the sight in front of him. "Why chim chim, jealous?" Namjoon piped in smugly at which Jimin replied with a "you wish".

"I think it may have been a singing contest, you know......." Exci said slowly and who seemed to oblivious of her immediate surroundings. "Actually it was a singing contest, yes...I remember now, thank you Ann, I think you were right". Ann merely shrugged in response. "Did I lose it? That must explain why I'd been so obsessed with being perfect at singing when I first met you all in school". "And perfect you are~" sung Ann and Sophie both, at which Exci shushed them. "Yeah, yeah I got ya".

"Jeez, talking about old stuff is helping me remember better.. I now remember that it was a birthday party of one of our classmates in kindergarten", Exci trails off, her voice sounding a little more certain than before. Jin nods at her as he stretches out his arms, a somewhat thoughtful look on his face. Sophie mumbled something under her breath and Namjoon drew her closer, pecking her forehead lightly. This scene got a few eye-rolls from the other members who were still seated and Ann, who suddenly poked at Yoongi and muttered, "what a lazy, unromantic boyfriend I've got". However, all that poking seemed to have no effect on him for he continued to snuggle comfortably on her lap, sleeping. She sighed and leaned back against the legs of the couch against which she was resting, thinking of ways to torment her poor boyfriend for being not enough cuddly, once he woke up.

A sudden sound made all heads snap back to Exci who suddenly looked very delighted and proud, her eyes shining with amusement. "I remember...", she mumbles. Then she suddenly started speaking very quickly. "This-- this earring...I-I wanted it. This was the prize they were giving at that birthday party if-- for the person who won the singing contest. I remember wanting it so badly, it was practically the only thing I was eyeing the whole time. My friend, I don't remember his name anymore was assuring me that there are many such beautiful earrings and I needn't worry so much about it. But I was ecstatic and obstinate too", she shook her head. "Hm I can imagine," Ann added thoughtfully. Giving her a look, Exci continued, "so I didn't even enjoy with my friends...I was rehearing outside the whole time with him supporting me...I mean, I realize now what a wonderful friend he had been, to have left his other friends and all and only supporting me". Jim nodded his head, saying "of course, of course" absently, glancing suddenly at the kitchen. "But I was too small to realize that the contest was for the birthday girl, and for her to win. And she did. She-she won that earring. And I was devastated", Exci chuckled. "He tried to stop me. I probably made a huge scene. My parents were away with work, so they couldn't make it to the party. I think I ran back crying". "How dramatic", Ann muttered.

"I know", Exci laughed, then continued, "my friend tried to come back, but his parents were there or something. Heck, I don't remember very clearly. But what I do remember is that he stood on my front porch for a quite a while after the party ended, til my parents found him there staring up at the windows", she giggled. "What I wouldn't do to get a friend like that now". "Yeah, Miss cliché queen, you would love that", Sophie commented, at which everyone laughed including Exci.

"But that doesn't explain how you got that earring!", spoke Hoseok, who had been very quiet the whole time. "Yeah I know", Exci sighed,"and that's the part where my memory is a little hazy".

_____________________________________________

"Hey, what's up with that behaviour? You all right??", Clearing his throat, Taehyung looks at the younger member, frowning. Jungkook was leaning against the kitchen counter, gulping down water. It almost seemed as if he was forcibly drinking glasses of water to distract himself. Rubbing his mouth with his sleeve, he replies absently, "yes, of course". Taehyung pretended not to hear his answer, or he chose to ignore it. His frown deepened as he voiced a question, "is she the one...?" Trailing off towards the end, he looks up at the younger member uncertainly, watching his reaction intently.

With a sharp intake of breath, Jungkook quickly puts down or rather, slams down his glass of water. Wincing a bit from the sound or perhaps, also from the question (which though sounded fairly simple seemed to have a deeper meaning for him), he blurts out a "no". Then his eyes widens in realization and he quickly tries to mend his words, "What are you talking about? I-I mean.." Stammering, he clutches hold of the glass that he had put down on the kitchen counter and brings it to his lips. Not meeting his hyung's confused-but-suspicious eyes, he gulps it down in one-go. Taehyung lets out a humourless laugh. "Who are you trying to deceive? I've known you for years now, you know", he raises an eyebrow at him towards the end but Jungkook simply shook his head. With slightly trembling hands, he tries to lift the bottle to pour himself another drink when Taehyung quickly strides across the kitchen and catches hold of his wrist. "You've had enough", he chides, "you don't wanna keep wanting to pee in Sophie's house. Namjoon would get mad". Jungkook chuckles a bit at that, but the smile didn't seem to reach his eyes. "I've been watching you for a while now", Taehyung speaks slowly, "you've got that faraway, sad look in your eyes that people get when they are in love", he smiles at him. "I'm not in love with her, " Jungkook is quick to reply, "o-or a-at l-least I'm not a-anymore..." his cheeks turn a bright shade of red at the confession. "So, you do know that it's her then, right?" The older member grins at him cheekily at which Jungkook groans. "I don't know!" He throws up his arms in protest. "I haven't seen her for a decade! I-I only remembered here name...", he trails off as his gaze turns towards the window and he stares out, looking at the vehicles rushing past the busy road and the abandoned building that stood opposite the road... _Hmm, there was a building like that in Busan too...we used to play-- "Kookie! It's dangerous! Don't go in there!" A shrill voice rings out. "It's okay Exci, I'll keep you safe!" He calls out from the terrace of the old building that had become a place for kids to play hide-and-seek. "You never listen to me", a figure stands straight on the road, hands on her waist and looking defiantly up at her friend that had decided to explore the old abandoned house that day.

"Jungkook. Jungkook. JUNGKOOK!" Taehyung waves his hand in front of Jungkook's face. "Earth to Jungkook!" The maknae looks back ta V startled, his eyes open wide. "What were you thinking? Already lost in thoughts of your girlfriend?!" He giggles. "Friend. A childhood friend. NOT girlfriend", Jungkook corrects sternly and turns around to look out of the window again. Taehyung had the vague feeling that he was probably trying to hide his face from him.

"You should go talk to her, you know", he suggests softly. Seeing Jungkook shake his head stubbornly, he sighs. "She doesn't remember your name or face, clearly". Jungkook lowers his head, as if in defeat. "Hey, I'm sure she'll be delighted to meet you again. She seems to have very fond memories of her childhood friend, it's just that she doesn't remember the name and face. Doesn't necessarily mean that she doesn't care...you know?" He puts a hand on his shoulder, turning him around to face him. "I-I only remembered her face as a child...it was this vague resemblance that triggered my memory when I saw her face beside Ann and Sophie's." Taehyung pats his head softly and smiles. "I've been with you for almost a decade now. Being the two youngest members of the band has brought us closer than anyone might expect..." Jungkook smiled at him too at that. "I know...", he mumbled. V continued, "It doesn't take a genius to figure out that your inherent awkwardness with girls is not what other people make out to be. You were in love with your childhood friend..." Kookie repeatedly shook his head at that, "no, no--" "Let me finish. Your childish heart made a promise to itself that it would wait for the girl it had fallen for, you perhaps were too young to even realize the feeling as love. Isn't that so?", he chuckles to himself,shaking his head in amusement. Lowering his voice, he says, "Jungkook, you've left your family at such a young age...your emotions, feelings...you hardly got to understand them completely before you had to go into the idol life. You were still a kid when you had to enter this life of responsibility..." Jungkook stared at the older member, wide-eyed, listening. "I know it sounds weird to hear me speak about your feelings this way, but hear me out...your confused emotions never got a shape. Your feelings, your promise that you'd never open upto any other girl slowly manifested into that awkwardness you now always feel around other women". Taehyung stopped to look at him, then continued, "you may have almost forgotten her, or at least buried her memories deep in your mind... but your mind almost involuntarily kept feeling uncomfortable around other women of your age". He chuckles a bit. "You're still such a kid, you know. I actually had to sort out your feelings for you. Exci seems to be much more mature than you are, she'll do you a lot of good". He laughs at which Jungkook lowers his head, embarrassed and blushing. "She hasn't changed much, you know hyung?" Jungkook looks up suddenly, his eyes gleaming with fond memories of his past.

"I know", V laughed. "You wouldn't have been so entranced with her otherwise. I can observe people better than you think, you know..." Jungkook lowers his head again, but this time he chuckled slowly. "Hyung, never in my life did I think that I'd have to take life-advices from you. Its Namjoon hyung who's in charge of that department, you know". "Yah whatever do you mean by that??" Taehyung interjected, sending the flustered maknae one of his boxy grins. "I know what you mean, gukkie. But it doesn't hurt to be a lil philosophical sometimes, especially when it comes to solving your problems, you kid". Jungkook pouted at that, and Taehyung poked a finger into his puffed-up cheeks. Letting down his breath, he winks at his hyung, his face now practically glowing with joy, "C'mon hyung, I have a friendship to revive".

"You think I sound okay? My voice sounds so hoarse after practicing... I shouldn't have--" she sighs, her hands all fidgety as she looks at her friend anxiously. "I've told you a million times already Exci, you sound just fine", he says smiling, then adding with a wink and a playful smirk, "if you ask me, I'd definitely say you deserve that prize tonight", he ended in a flourish. "Yeahh, don't exaggerate!" Jungkook's meaningful compliment which,he hoped would please her seemed to have the opposite effect and she grew more distressed. "Don't lie kook, don't you lie to me!" She cried out, almost panic-stricken. Rubbing the back of his head confusedly, Jungkook confessed, "I was only trying to make you feel better", then noticing the devastated look on his friend's face, he quickly added, "but I wasn't lying! You sound so good, really better than that birthday girl". He nodded his head hopefully to emphasize his point but Exci grew more tensed and hysterical by the second. "You're saying that only so that you can leave me and go play with your friends! Other friends", she made air-quotes, "YOU don't want to stay here!" she pointed a finger at her friend accusingly. It was her friend's turn to get hysterical now as he vigorously shook his head from side to side, his long-ish hair becoming all the more messy and getting in his face. But he didn't care. Not when his friend, his best friende was accusing him of not being a true friend. "No Exci, how could you say that??" He cried at her, " I only want to be with you! I-I...We'll practice till you think its perfect", he hangs his head in shame, his cheeks tinged pink from all the emotion that boiled within him. Exci started at his saddened face and opened his mouth to speak, but then thought the better of it and merely shook her head. They kept practicing.

"Kook, I'm scared", Exci turns a tearful gaze at her friend that stood by her side, clutching her hand tightly. He gave it a squeeze, "you're very good, don't worry", he turned to smile at him. He gave her an enthusiastic nod and said, "you'll beat them girls. Trust me", he pointed at the group that stood huddled by the stage. "Kook, don't point!" She squealed in alarm, and tried to force his hand down which was now pointing at the other competitors. "What?" He blinked his eyes in surprise, lowering his arm. "It's true, you'll do well". Exci smiled at him sadly, "I'm sorry for shouting at you earlier. You're such a good friend ", she squeezed back his hand. Jungkook's eyes lit up with delight as he replied, albeit a little flustered, "don't you worry about any of that!" "Go,go", he gives her a push and as she gets up on the stage, she looks back at him and sends him a nervous grin and a wave, and Jungkook waves back with an enthusiastic grin and a nod to go in. "All the best", he mouthed to her.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Jungkook smiled a bit as he remembered the memory. This is the story that Exci was now currently trying to narrate to the others, though very poorly. She has forgotten almost everything, and was stuttering and trailing off frequently, squinting her eyes trying to remember the details. "Memory of a goldfish ", Jungkook smiles, repeating the words to himself. Taehyung was leading the way back to the drawing room where the rest were seated, and her voice could be heard all the way from there.

"But that doesn't explain how you got that earring!", complained Hoseok at something she probably said. "Yeah I know", Exci could be heard sighing in defeat, " "and that's the part where my memory is a little hazy".

"Guess someone needs to fill up the gaps and speak in more detail", Taehyung's deep, loud voice fills the room. Exci and Jin looks up at him in surprise. "Oh you finished taking the drink?" Sophie interjects, lifting her head from Namjoon's chest to look at Jungkook and putting his hands away that were stroking her head, at which he let out a definite sound of protest. "What do you mean?" Exci ignores everyone else and stares at Taehyung, her eyes boring into his. He cleared his throat a bit, clearly uncomfortable of being glared at by Exci. Jin's eyes went wide as he looked from Taehyung to Exci and then Jumgkook". "He agreed??", he mouthed to Tae who seemed to grow flustered with wo many people trying to get answers from him. Jungkook glared at Jin and muttered, "oh just how many people did he tell my story to..." Taehyung grimaced, one of his hand moving back to rub the back of his head. "Uhh..." he seemed unable to form a complete sentence. "Can I finish your story?" Jungkook speaks up suddenly, looking at Exci. She stared back. "W-what I mean to s-say is, I know the rest of your story", he finishes lamely and winces at the poor choice of his words. "And how could you possibly know her story?" Ann spoke up in an amused voice, from the corner of the room. She stroked her chin, and muttered, "do you happen to be one of her friends from back then?" Exci stiffened and muttered under her breath, "it can't be,can it?"

Clearing his throat, he began. "You were devastated with how the contest ended. We were too small to know that the contest was arranged for the birthday girl to win. We, you weren't supposed to win", he took a breath, "you got hysterical and started crying in anger. I think you said some pretty harsh words to the birthday girl at which she too burst out crying. Then," he looks at Exci who seemed astonished. Both were thinking of the same incident.

"You!" She pointed a finger accusingly at the birthday girl whose face was tear-stained. "You're terrible, you cant even sing in tune. How did you win?" Her voice took on a higher pitch as she cried out shrilly. The birthday girl began to sob again. Exci cried harder, burying her face in her arms. The parents looked bewildered, some looked sympathetically at the two girls arguing. She had every reason to be angry, but it wasn't exactly the birthday girl's fault either. Both were kids after all. The girl's best friend stood up. "Exci its okay", the little boy ran to his crying best friend and hugged her. But she was crying too hard to notice. "You did well. You deserve the prize. I don't know why everyone is so unfair here", he glared at the birthday girl's parents who looked very flustered and confused, looking over her shoulder as he hugged her tightly. She pulled free from his grasp, her features contorted with rage. "No I'm not ready to accept that. You are siding with them, aren't you?" She sobbed and Jungkook shook his head helplessly. "No, no, no, you're getting me all wrong. When did I say that?" He cried, colour rushing onto his cheeks as he protested defiantly. "I-I..." he spluttered, and she went on, "save it! I'm going home", and before he could protest, she ran out of the hall. He tried to go after her, his feet automatically moving across the hall, but was stopped by his parents. They didn't approve of the horrible scene and absolutely did not want their son to be a part of it. "L-let me go!", He struggled against the tight grip that his mother had on him. He tried to pull free, then slouched in defeat when he saw that he wouldn't be allowed to go after her. "You can meet her after the party", came a stern voice and he was soon dragged back to the hall, helpless against his mother's strong grip on his arm. He sighed in defeat.

"you kind of ran out in anger, sobbing...", Jungkook laughed awkwardly as he looked at the eight pairs of eyes that were glued to his face. "U-uh, b-but h-how d-did you--", Exci opened her mouth in protest but ended up stammering badly. Pursing her lips, she gave a nod, urging him to move on. Jungkook's stare never left Exci's face as he continued, "I wasn't actually allowed to go after you, you see...my parents didn't want a scene. So I decided to check up on you after the party--" "Wait", Ann cut in sharply, "what do you mean by you wanting to go after her?" She glanced at her friend who had a very curious expression on her face. She seemed to be struggling with something on her mind, as if she it was difficult for her to grasp the facts that were being thrown at her. "Y-you mean..." She trailed off, looking up at him meaningfully. A flush began to crawl up Jungkook's neck, across his face and his behind his flashing, dark eyes that suddenly seemed unable to meet her eyes. He gave an almost imperceptible nod. Sophie audibly let out a loud gasp and Hoseok could be heard swearing. Namjoon murmured something under his breath and even Jimin, for once seemed unable to speak anything at all except, "oh my god". Jin, with a highly amused voice spoke out, "So kook, won't you tell us the rest of the story?" This earned him a glare from both Taehyung and Jungkook, and he effectively shut up after that. "Y-yeah, I mean...", He looked hopefully at Exci, who had a very unreadable expression on her face. Was she happy to see him? Or was she disappointed that her charming childhood best friend turned out to be the dorky maknae of BTS, Jeon Jungkook...It was hard to say.

"I c-could'nt follow you immediately though I wanted to, so I went after you after the party and--" "I remember that", she interjected, a sudden smile showing on her face. "You waited outside our house on the front porch for almost an hour. But I was either too sad--" and she laughed humourlessly at this, "or too stubborn and bitchy to come down". She chuckled genuinely at this, and he suddenly felt warm all over. Maybe she isn't too sad to get back her friend, he thinks.

"Jungkook! Come home", spoke a voice from beyond the gates that led into the front porch of her house. "It's really late", said her mother kindly, and with a swift glance at the top window that had heavy curtains drawn across it, commented, "she's not in a mood to talk tonight. You can come again tomorrow". "You did your job as a friend, right?", interjected his father as he looked at his son wearily who stubbornly refused to move from the place. "I promised you can come here again tomorrow right after breakfast tomorrow, okay?" She lay her hand on his shoulder. They've been standing here for a while now trying to convince him to leave. "I guess you are right", sighed the boy in defeat, and his mother led him towards the gate. But he stopped to look back after every few steps, reluctantly turned the corner on the street and the house disappeared from view.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

"Enough with the daydreaming guk", Jimin's bored voice as he twirled a stray strand of hair around his finger, broke him out of his reverie. He turned to look at him with a "huh?" and a blank look on his face. "Now how many times do I need to tell you that you need to cut that hair!", Jin's loud voice echoed around the silent room, "you look horrible with that long hair. And Jungkook, you should pay more attention to your surroundings--" His ramblings were cut off by giggles from Jimin who rolled his eyes and said, "okayy mom". "Hey you-" began Jin, but he was once again interrupted by a groan that came from where Yoongi was sleeping. He seemed to have finally finished his daily quota of naps and was letting out a yawn. "Yah! Why don't you close your mouth?!", came Ann's voice who raised an eyebrow at her boyfriend that lay sleeping on her lap and who was now giving her a sheepish grin. "Hey". "Rise and shine, Min", she poked him on the already-puffed up (from sleeping) cheeks and he frowned. "No 'baby I had such a good time stroking your head while you slept?' I could feel you doing that, you know", he smirked up at his girlfriend who positively rolled her eyes. "Yeah not so much, especially when I can't even feel my legs now coz you were sleeping on it for so long", sighed Ann, "now get up and see what you missed". She grinned and winked at him. He looked ready to protest, but was interrupted by Jin. "First you rudely interrupt my lecture, then you act all lovey-dovey with Ann here. Kook here was telling us his childhood love story..." "Not a love story!", cried Jungkook, who had turned a bright red and Exci who sat opposite to him also blushed deep red. "Whose? Kook's?" Yoongi looked genuinely surprised as he looked at Jungkook. "What have I been missing out on--" he stifled a yawn that escaped his lips at which Ann snorted. "You can go back to sleep now. You've missed a lot, but you ain't gettin a recap", she huffed and looked away. "Why's she so salty?", pouted Yoongi and looked at Hoseok who merely shrugged in response. "Maybe coz you've not been cuddling her enough?", Jimin raised his eyebrows suggestively with a glance towards Sophie and Namjoon. Namjoon was currently pressing a kiss on Sophie's forehead, with one of his arms around her who was laying quite still on his chest. He was whispering softly to her while threading a hand through her short-trimmed hair. She was mumbling something in response and nodding her head.

"Ahh", exclaimed Yoongi and turned around with a smirk. "You need my attention?", he says with his eyes sparkling with mischief and sends a cheeky grin. Ann turns around immediately, her eyes reduced to slits as she huffed, "ofc not! Huh", then continued to mutter afterwards, "who'd want your attention?!" Yoongi rolls his eyes and said, "I heard that, you idiot". Ann turned around to retort, when Jin cleared his throat. "Ahem...", and when they all turned to look at him, "ahem, so yeah as I was saying, Kook here was saying something." Yoongi, who looked a little annoyed since his moment was disturbed, rolled his eyes and waved him off, "yeah Kook, I'm all ears now".

_________________________________________

"Exci is down with fever, honey", her mom sighed for probably the hundredth time that day. Jungkook had been standing there for almost an hour now, refusing to leave before he got to see her face.

Shaking his head frantically, he speaks in a high-pitched voice, his eyes all wide and cheeks flushed, as he tried his best to make her understand how urgent this was. "I said I have something to give her! Please, it won't take more than a few minutes!"

God, why are these kids so stubborn, Exci's mom thought resignedly. She let out a sigh once more and slowly trudged up the staircase, leaving the flustered, yet desperate kid standing behind, who had a small parcel clutched to his chest.

"Exci, he won't leave until you see him. I have a lot of work to do other than acting as a mediator between you two kids. Resolve your fights on you own. I'm asking him to come up." Exci grumbled from under the blankets. She wasn't really sick. Half ashamed of the utter fool she made of herself yesterday and half mad at him for no reason whatsoever, she was just being a bratty little kid, refusing to face her best friend's worried face.

"Mom I'm telling you that I'm not in the mood right now. Just ask him to leave, I can't believe he won't budge even though you're saying I'm sick! " She screamed from under her blanket. When she heard no response from her mom, slowly she peaked out,pulling the blanket away from her face.

[ Jeez, gotta apologize for this one. I posted this mistakenly while scrolling through my draft. This scene is NOT complete as yet!! But uhh since I already posted it, I'm gonna keep it here ig? And keep adding a few paragraphs to the scene whenever I feel like it?! Hehehe~ ]

[artisanalgoats]

Something I posted on fb that I think is important re: Elizabeth Warren

Hey, y'all. I want to address something I've seen in some circles online regarding the state of the Democratic primary, especially in the wake of Elizabeth Warren's suspending her campaign. Now, before I say anything else, I want to get a few things out of the way: I'm a white, cisgender man, who has been extremely fortunate in a number of ways in my life, none the least of which being that I've been surrounded by a very small number of people in my life who have tried to defy sexism as best they can, and to instill those same habits in me. I don't say all that to gloat, or to try to inoculate myself against accusations of sexism, but rather to let y'all know heading forward that I've never really experienced misogyny or the strain of toxic masculinity that tends to run through our society, at least not directly; so my ability to spot them, although I do my damnedest, may not always be the best. Less consequentially, I was also planning to vote for Warren in my state's primary, with Sanders being my second (now first) choice. So what I say is in no way an attack on Warren or on those upset at her suspending her campaign. What I have to say is about the way we talk about her suspending her campaign.

I've seen some people complaining about how the Democratic primary has been reduced to "two white men yelling at each other." And while people's frustration at the failure of yet another female candidate is perfectly valid, saying Biden and Sanders are just "white men yelling at each other" is, frankly, offensively reductive.

When most people refer to "white people," what I think they mean is "white Christians," and white people who were raised with Christian worldviews (I'm looking at you, atheist ex-Christians). And while white Jews can absolutely perpetrate the same sort of racism that white Christians perpetuate, treating Jewishness and Christianness as comparable is only possible with a basic misunderstanding of what Jewishness is. It is not (only) a belief in one or another god. It's also an ethnicity, one that for over a thousand years has spent its existence surviving genocide after genocide, and remembering those countless innocents who didn't make it; just look at half our holidays, if you don't believe. Start with Purim.

And unlike many black folks, many Latino folks, many Asian folks, etc., we white Jews can hide our otherness - we can refuse to wear yarmulkes, not put mezuzahs on our doors, and so forth. That is a privilege not many have. But the fact that we even face the threat of violence if we fail to do so must not be forgotten! By treating Bernie as just another white guy, we're erasing all of that history, violence and bloodshed that Jewish people have suffered and continue to suffer. And I hate to sound like an alarmist, but, frankly, aside from being offensive, nothing enables more violence like a persistent refusal to acknowledge that violence has happened and continues to occur. This is not to say that the people engaging in this talk are trying to incite a pogrom! But our actions have consequences, intended and otherwise.

Criticizing Sanders is fine! Being upset that once again an extremely qualified woman was passed up for men is fine (I agree with you)! But as liberals and lefties we have to be better than this. We can't just ignore an important part of someone's identity and pretend that he's just the same as his opponent just because he's also white. We can't erase Jewishness without denying the value of Jewish people, and when we refuse to talk about Jewish people or their Jewishness, that's exactly what we're doing. Those of you who have been engaging in this: I don't think you meant to erase us. But you have. Think about how you talk. Be better.

[aphrodite-l-writes]

Suffered Enough

Pair: Bucky Barnes x OC

Warnings: Self-deprecating thoughts, some language maybe?

A/N: Hi Y'all! I will be writing reader-inserts in the future so please send in requests! I know many people aren’t huge fans of OC characters but I just wanted to give everyone a little promo of how I like to write? Please send in some feedback as this is the first thing I have published and I hope it is okay! Love xx

(Part 2)

*

I don't know you

But I want you

All the more for that

My morning coffee run was interrupted by the most attractive man I had ever seen, everything about him radiating beauty. His hair was pulled away from his face, highlighting his strong facial features. The way his skin glowed in the light was almost godly. He chimed a quiet thank you to the barista who smiled at him in return as he sat close to the window. He pulled a slightly-used copy of ‘Cat on a Hot Tin Roof’ from his small backpack, opening it to what appeared to be the last chapter. He pulled a pencil from his bun, his hair tumbling onto his shoulders as he scribbled a short note in the margin of the novel.

I was so engrossed in the behaviours of the man that I missed the same barista calling my own name. I scrambled to grab my large cup, smiling at him before dropping a tip in the jar. Every piece of me wanted to know him more. He seemed so far away from this world, yet somehow so close to the earth.

Words fall through me

And always fool me

And I can't react

And games that never amount

To more than they're meant

Will play themselves out

Once again, I found myself admiring the man in the coffee shop. He had finished Williams’ play and had moved on to ‘Lord of the Flies,’ one of my personal least favourite classics. I caressed my cup and pretending to be typing as I watched him stand, making his way towards me. His piercing eyes bore into mine as he stopped softly in front of me.

“I know the arm is weird but can you stop staring at it, please.” He huffed, exhausted.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Which I really didn’t. I had yet to notice the fact that one of his hands were metal.

“Oh, um, you weren’t staring at my arm?” He blushed, the soft pink making his features stand out further as he reached his arm to the back of his neck, rubbing it out of embarrassment.

“No, I hadn’t noticed your arm until now. I like literature. You have been reading some classics and I was just curious to see how you reacted.”

My well-formulated excuse seemed to be convincing as he relaxed his shoulders. “I am so sorry for accusing you like that.”

“You don’t need to apologise, I’m sure it would’ve been weird. I’m really sorry!”

He stood awkwardly in front of me for a while, clearly thinking, confused about what to say. “How are you liking Lord of the Flies?” I asked with a small smile.

“May I?” He gestured towards the chair and I nodded, probably too enthusiastically. “I like it, but it moves slowly. It’s a great concept but the execution is strange. How do you feel about it?”

“Personally, I absolutely hate it.” I laughed at my remark and he smiled softly. “On the other hand, I think it’s an interesting concept but the pacing is odd.”

“I agree. Cat on a Hot Tin Roof was much better.”

I smiled in agreement before catching a glimpse of his wristwatch. 12:37. I had been so occupied by the man that I completely lost track of the time. “Fuck, I’m sorry but I have to go. I have a class to teach in 20 minutes! It was lovely to finally talk to you…”

“James. James Barnes.” His grin made my stomach feel as if it was going to explode, his eyes glistening and his teeth perfectly white.

“Until we meet again James Barnes.” I smiled in return before collecting my things and beginning to leave.

“Wait, I never got your name!”

“Oh, sorry. It’s Audrey.”

“Just Audrey?

I nodded over my shoulder with a grin before rushing out of the cafe and to the high school, giddy from excitement over the perfect man in the cafe. James.

Falling slowly, eyes that know me

And I can't go back

Moods that take me and erase me

And I'm painted black

Bucky smiled over at me as we sat atop his car, overlooking the city, his blue eyes glistening in the moonlight. The cool breeze all but bothered me as he had placed his jacket over my shoulders, holding it onto my body by bringing me closer to his side. After only knowing the man for a month, I felt surprisingly comfortable with him. His friend Steve was worried that the two of us were moving too fast, but he grew to like me, at least it seemed that way.

I felt his lips on my cheek and snuggled my face further into his neck. “Am I finally going to know that elusive last name of yours?” He teased.

“Oh Barnes, only since you asked so nicely. My full name is Audrey Margaret Martinelli.”

“Martinelli?”

“Yeah, why?”

“I knew a girl with that last name once.”

“Really? Maybe it was one of my cousins?”

“I doubt it. It was a long time ago anyway.”

His sudden dismissive behaviour was curious and I sat up, holding his face between my two small hands. I stared into his eyes which studied my face intently, soon filling with realisation. He pushed himself away from me, my hands falling from his face.

“James? What’s wrong?”

“Please, Audrey, drop it. It’s nothing. Get in the car, I’ll take you home.”

“Buck, please…”

“It’s nothing, please… Can we just go home?”

You have suffered enough

And warred with yourself

It's time that you won

The incessant ringing of my phone woke me and I groaned as I saw an unknown number. I contemplated just not answering but decided against it, picking up the phone. The phone on the other line was definitely not a friend of mine.

“Audrey?”

“Yes, that’s me?”

“This is Steve Rogers. Bucky’s friend.”

My body jolted upright at the mention of James. After a week of having ignored texts and mixed calls, it was just what I needed. “Oh my God, Hi Steve. Is he okay?”

“He is okay, but he hasn’t left his apartment. I was wondering if you could meet me here. I’m guessing he would probably want to talk to you about it too.”

“Thank you, Steve. I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

I ran from the small apartment I lived in, to my bike, pedalling as if my body could power it forever. I couldn’t feel the burn in my thighs at all as I sped through the busy New York streets, dodging pedestrians with skill. Before I knew it, I was out the front of the quaint building, leaving my bike attached to a post outside and sprinting as fast as I could up the stairs.

My hand was raised, ready to knock on the chipping door, but Steve beat me to it. He flung the door open, ushering me in with a smile of sympathy. I saw Bucky sitting at the table, his head in his hands, elbows firmly placed. It was possibly the saddest sight I had come to see. Someone so kind, so strong yet so very broken.

“James…” I spoke as softly as I could as I stepped towards the fragile man. He flinched at the mention of his first name.

“Bucky...please.” It was as if he was begging me.

“I’m sorry Bucky, I didn’t mean to upset you.”

“No, it’s my fault. It’s all my fault.” He began to sob and my heart felt as if it was shattering. “I shouldn’t even be here, alive.”

“Bucky, please don’t say that!”

“Steve, why did you bring her here? Huh, to rub it in? The fact that I can never be happy?” He spat, fire filling his wet eyes.

“Buck, I think you need to tell her. I mean, we’re all connected. She is her granddaughter.” Steve was almost as cautious as I was.

“Wait, how would you two know my grandmother? Angie is dead, she has been for a while.”

“I know Audrey. I don’t think I properly introduced myself. I’m Steve Rogers, Captain America.”

My heart rose to my throat. The man standing in front of me had been through hell, yes, but he knew my grandmother. He knew her friend Peggy well. He must know more than I do about her, about their relationship, about Angie’s life.

“Yes, and I would love to hear you talk more about my grandmother, but what has that got to do with Bucky?”

“Buck, do you want to tell her?” Steve’s question was answered with a small nod.

“Auds, doll, come sit.”

I sat directly in front of the man I had come to know so well, grasping his hands in mine. He was quick to tell me when he met Steve, in the 1930s. Everything in me was telling me to run at that exact moment but something made me stay. Whether it was that I had grown to almost love the man, but he was good and kind. He deserved love as much as everyone else.

Soon, he had told me about how Hydra forced him into becoming the Winter Soldier but how his reform led to him becoming somewhat an asset to the Avengers, mostly, Steve’s cause. His eyes were filled with so much pain over what he had done to people, or what he was brainwashed to do.

“I know it’s all a bit much. You can leave, please, I can’t bear to have you tell me how disgusting I am.” He pulled his hands from my own.

“Bucky, I don’t think you are anything less than the kindest, most wonderful man I have met.”

“You don’t mean that.”

“Yes, I do. You are extraordinary Bucky Barnes. You are human and you are beautiful and I don’t know why you had to suffer so much, but you deserve to be happy now. You have felt so much pain and now you are free to be happy.” I smiled up at him, standing to meet him and bringing my hand up to his face, wiping a fallen tear from his cheek.

He pulled me into his chest, pressing a kiss to my forehead. I stayed in his large arms, cherishing the affection while it lasted. “Thank you for telling me Bucky.”

“You deserved to know.”

There was a minuscule silence that Steve soon broke. “You look very similar to your grandmother. Almost the exact same. It’s fascinating.”

“That’s quite the compliment, Mr Rogers.” I grinned and Bucky let out a breathy laugh. “Ooooh, tell me what she got up to as a teenager!”

Steve and Bucky began telling me stories about her, myself in Buck’s lap as the three of us laughed hysterically. The two don’t particularly scream ‘fun’ when you look at their exteriors but the two were a perfect pair, chiming in each other's stories. The three of us were happy. Bucky finally seemed genuinely happy.

Falling slowly sing your melody

I'll sing it loud

The tall ceilings of the hall amazed me, the crystal chandeliers hanging so beautifully, the light coming in from the windows hitting the shards and reflecting onto the skin if those standing near it. I thought I was alone admiring the venue until Bucky appeared next to me, holding his arm out for me grab ahold of. I took it gladly and he escorted me towards the large group of people, all dressed beautifully.

“You look beautiful doll.” He whispered, pressing a small kiss on my cheek. “They’ll love you, I promise.”

[choisgirls]

I love both of you admins (ಥ﹏ಥ) anyways can you give me the RFA, Saeran's, and V's reaction to a very shy MC but as soon as they get to know her is like she's on crack

A/N: Thank you!! ^^ love you too~ and honestly this;;; this is how i act it is /so bad/ but im at the point were i dont even hide it from y’all  

(ﾉ≧∀≦)ﾉ・‥…━━━★ ~Admin 404

*YOOSUNG:

               He felt like the two of you weresimilar! You were shy at first, and slowly you started to open up, like hewould when he meets people in person! Piece by piece, he got to see your truecolours and he just loved you more and more! But man one day he saw the wholerainbow. You were spouting off random phrases, weird comparisons, and talkingnonstop while playing LOLOL with him one night. He just stared at you, unsurewhat to really think of it. But thank god now he can stop pretending to besemi-normal and he can just let go, saying whatever he wanted to the game, nolonger having to pick and choose his words, he is sssoooo excited!

*ZEN:

               Seeing your shy smile and smallblush across your face absolutely melted his heart and sort of tickled thebeast if he was honest. He always felt the need to protect you, always goingout of his way to keep the attention on him in situations he could tell youwere uncomfortable in! For once it wasn’t him getting attention because hewanted it, it was to help you! But the longer you spend with him, the morecomfortable you became which meant you were about to just let it all go. Youwould jump around, run towards things, run /over/ things, even run in circlesaround him. Where did all of this energy come from? You’re so… enthusiasticand he was okay with it… for the most part. But MC, he just wants to see youshy again, please, just once ;A;

*JAEHEE:

                Ah yes, cute and quiet, just like her (wellmost of the time). She appreciated that you could be calm and reserved aroundothers, even when under stress. Did she feel bad that it was because you wereshy? Of course she did! But she was always there to step up and talk for youwhen you needed it! As your relationship progressed, however, the quiet you wasreplaced by one who could talk a mile a minute. About absolutely anything yetnothing at the same time. There were moments she had to put her hand up tosignal you to take a breath because you would forget. You knew to be cautiouswhen she had headaches but otherwise, she was okay with it! She like to hearall of your thoughts, no matter how odd they were, about everything in theworld.

*JUMIN:

               You were absolutely adorable andhe would do anything he could to hide you away and keep you for himself.Apparently that’s frowned upon. So he lived for your small smiles and redcheeks as much as he could. So sweet, so quiet, and so gentle- he loved you,and he believed he could get you to be loud and strong if you needed to be, butfor now, he would take care of all of that for you. The longer you spent withhim though, the more comfortable you got, and the more comfortable you got, themore hyper you became. You were constantly bouncing in your seat, always fullof smiles, running and dancing around the house with Elizabeth, singing loudlydown the halls. He loved it! He loved that there was this playful, outgoingside to you that only he got to see. Because of this, he found it slightlyeasier to allow everyone else to witness your adorable shy smiles as well- butonly slightly.

*SAEYOUNG:

               He was actually afraid ofupsetting you or making you uncomfortable at first. You were so quiet andseemed easily flustered, and he just wanted to joke around and melt in thatadorable blush that formed across your face! So, instead of calming down, he justkept being himself! But, the more he’s around you, the more comfortable youget, and he! Lives! For it! Because when you’re comfortable, you’re just likehim! Always joking around, constantly getting the members to wonder if the twoof you do drugs in your spare time, and always down for spontaneous pranks andfights. Water balloon fights, pillow fights, marshmallow fights, anything- nomatter who’s around. Everyone wants the two of you to take a drug test,especially Saeran.

*DADDV:

               Precious lil smol bean aw heloves you. You thinks you’re the most precious thing in the universe, so shy,so pure. Always complimenting you and taking pictures of the shy faces you makeafterwards. Sometimes it’s hard to get a picture in the first place becauseyou’re so shy that you hide behind objects or your own hands! But the longeryou’re together, the more you come out of your shell, which means morebeautiful pictures of you!! He takes them when you’re running around, jumpingoff of things, and climbing things you really shouldn’t be, because you justdon’t want to stand still! But you’re always making him laugh so he’s alreadyready to record you or take pictures to put in an album! You were certainlydifferent with him than you were with new people and he likes to think that’sbecause there’s two different sides to the moon~

*SAERAN:

               Neither of you fucking talked atfirst okay listen;;; It was all just silence. He was too shy, you were too shy,y'all were just a shy little duo and both of you were completely okay withthat? A lot of blushing and looking away whenever the two of you did interact,but it was super cute! Though, little by little, the two of you started to openup- talking more, joking more, the works! Except… when he was comfortablewith you, he would smile a lot more and joke around, you on the other hand…were almost like his brother. He still loved you of course, but you werebouncing off of walls, jumping onto him from the ceiling- no literally, you’vejumped off of a rafter onto him once. You would talk like crazy and he wouldjust sit and listen to you for hours, wondering how you had enough air to talkthat much. He’s used to the crazy because his brother is… excitable as well,but when he’s had enough he’ll shut you up with a small kiss because that is/the only way/ he knows he can keep you quiet for a long enough time.

Masterlist

[officialheroesofolympus]

Lift Breakdown (Barry Allen x reader)

OfficialHeroesOfOlympus: I'm back again with another Barry x reader fanfiction because who doesn't love Barry Allen? Thank y'all so much for the support, especially the 11 followers I have. Y'all made my day. I don't really know what being claustrophobic is like so please excuse my poorly written feelings about being claustrophobic.

Description: Ever since Barry came into S.T.A.R labs, he's always been mean to you. He insults you, calls you names and you do the same in return. But despite your ‘hatred’ for each other, both of you are close and know a lot about the other. So both of you walk into the lift at S.T.A.R labs and there's a lift breakdown which makes you panic since you're claustrophobic. He calms you down by talking and in the end... Well, you can guess

Reader Gender: Female

Characters/Ships: Barry Allen x reader, Cisco and Caitlin

Rating: PG13

Warnings: Hot make out session, slight coarse language

Y/H/C: Your Hair Colour

Y/L/C: Your Lipstick Colour

“They're coming!” Caitlin hisses, glaring pointedly at Cicso. Jerking up from his relaxed position on his chair, Cisco started rapidly typing on his computer, hunched over the blue screen.

While Cicso typed, Caitlin took the stairs, running down, not before shouting over her shoulder. “You handle Barry!” She shouted, slamming the door behind her.

Cisco furrowed his eyebrows, immaturely sticking his tongue out once she left. Before he could make a comment about Caitlin that was most probably not a compliment, Barry came into the room, a cup of coffee in one hand and his phone in the other.

“Hey Barry! What... Uh... Coffee is that?” Cisco asked, silently facepalming himself for asking such a ridiculous question. From the corner of his eyes, he looked at the live footage from the CCTV cameras placed around the lab.

He saw Caitlin panting heavily, her hands on her knees as she asked Y/N something, to which the Y/H/C haired woman raised her eyebrow but nonetheless, still nodded her head.

“BARRY! I need you to go down to the bottom level to get my phone. It's to help with your running things.” Cicso shouted, covering his back pocket which his phone was actually in.

Barry, who had surprisingly answered Cisco’s question about what coffee he was drinking and further elaborating, quirked his eyebrow, his lips pressed together.

“You will? Thanks Barry, you're the absolute best!” Cisco shouted, not even bothering to listen to Barry's answer. Almost as quick as the flash, Cisco started to push Barry towards the lift and pressed the button, just before Y/N could press it.

Sighing with relief, Cisco grinned happily, noting that the lift was travelling up which meant the plan was fortunately working.

Cisco and Caitlin had developed a not so well thought out plan that consisted of only one main goal, that actually didn't involve anything about Science. 

It was to get you and Barry together.

Both of the Scientists couldn't stand the fact that their respective Best Friend were always insulting, teasing and fighting with each other, only because they were too embarrassed that they had a crush on the opposite party.

They both liked each other. Cisco and Caitlin definitely knew that since most of their texts and conversations always involved their ‘nemesis’, like what they were probably doing, how disgustingly pretty or handsome they were and whether they were single.

It was frustrating for Cisco and Caitlin to see their best friends absolutely in love with each other in private and shouting at each other in public. It was annoyingly childish and they wanted nothing more but to just get the both of you admit to each other your feelings.

Even though both of you ‘hated’ each other, you actually knew a lot about each other since two of you always came at the weirdest of times to S.T.A.R labs. Like early in the morning or late at night, you were both be found insulting each other but when the insults actually allowed each of you to know more about the other person.

A ‘ding’ sounded Cisco back to reality and the lift doors opened slowly. Grinning with mischief, Cisco pushed Barry into the lift and the door closed.

Letting out a breath he didn't know he had been holding, Cisco rushed back to his desk to check the live footage. You were still waiting for the lift, tapping your foot impatiently with your arms crossed over your chest.

Suddenly, the stair doors burst open, a panting Caitlin rushing next to Cisco, peering anxiously at the screen despite being out of breath.

“What the hell?” Barry and you screamed at the same time, pointing a finger at each other with a look of pure shock and anger. Inwardly, you both felt butterflies fluttering in your stomach and you were happy to see each other.

“Are you stalking me Allen?” You questioned, a smirk gracing your features. Barry blushed a deep shade of red, shooting back, “Not even the ugliest man on the planet will stalk you.” 

With a frown on your face, you walked closer to Barry, jabbing your finger into his chest. “Well, at least I'm not a lovesick puppy, chasing after my longtime crush, Iris!” You shouted, involving Iris since Barry had no doubt gone to Jitters and had the coffee he was holding made by the said female.

Barry rolled his eyes, huffing angrily. “First of all, I do not have a crush on Iris! I just happened to mix up my feelings of love for her as a Sister with love, love. Second of all, I have a new crush and you don't see me chasing after her!” Barry shouted, blushing slightly at the sudden thought of you kissing him.

You felt your heart being torn into a million pieces and being rolled over by a truck. Barry had a crush on someone, probably much more beautiful, intelligent and better than you. And he was even blushing about the thought of her, even thought she wasn't even here.

Suddenly, you had no urge to fight back, even though you secretly liked the fights since it was the only thing that allowed you to talk to Barry. He hated you and you had to keep reminding yourself that and to not fall more in love with him.

“Let’s just go up and talk to Cisco and Caitlin. They were the ones that probably set this whole thing up.” You said quietly, stepping into the lift.

Staring at your shoes, you failed to notice a look of concern and worry on Barry’s face that replaced the smirk.

He quickly flashed into the lift, purposely pretending to be grossed out by you by standing to the side, despite the fact he actually wanted to be standing next to you, the sides of your bodies pressed against each other.

While the lift went up, the lights suddenly started flickering and the lift jerked slightly before everything had shut down, which made you and Barry standing in total darkness.

“What’s going on?” Barry yelled as you felt panic rising up in your chest. Taking big gulps of air, you staggered backwards, your back against the lift walls as you slid down, sitting on the floor.

Bringing your legs to your chest, you breathed heavily, burying your head in between your thighs while wrapping your arms around your legs.

You felt the walls closing in on you slowly, trapping you, restricting you from breathing. You took another deep breath but you felt yourself choking, you felt yourself only taking in panic and no oxygen.

Barry, who had been banging his fists against the lift door and yelling, suddenly noticed that you were extremely, strangely quiet.

“Y/N?” He asked, his only concern now you.

Feeling around in the dark, he felt his foot nudge against some thing that felt suspiciously like a shoe and he kneeled down slowly, feeling for the lift wall. Finally, he managed to sit himself next to you and he heard your fast, heavy breathing.

You felt claustrophobic.

Filled with worry and concern, he didn't know what to do. Should he put up with his act of ‘hating’ you? Should he hug you? Should he simply nudge you?

‘Screw it!’ He thought angrily and he found himself wrapping his arms around you, your bodies pressed against each other's as he slowly rubbed circles on your back.

“Shhh, Y/N, it's okay. It's fine. I'm here. You're fine.” He repeated over and over again like a mantra, and you soon found yourself becoming less rigid and leaning into Barry. Your breathing was now normal and you felt the walls pulling away from you.

Burying you head into Barry’s chest, you realised you had been crying. Your eyes had welled up with tears and they had trickled down your cheeks throughout your whole breakdown. Sniffling, you buried your head further into Barry’s chest.

“Thank you...” You whispered, your voice cracking.

Barry didn't reply but continued to rub circles on your back, gripping onto you as if his life depended on it.

“Barry? You can let go now.” You stated, even though you didn't really mean it. You were relaxing into his touch and you felt more comfortable than you had ever been in your life.

He pulled away almost reluctantly, his hands falling to his sides and his legs spreaded out on the floor. You, on the other hand, kept your hands on your lap and you sat ‘Indian style’.

“Barry... Why're you being so nice? Don’t you hate me?” You asked, breaking the silence between the both of you.

Barry’s eyes softened and without thinking it through, he placed his hand gently on top of yours and he held it, feeling millions of sparks going through his body.

“I could never hate you Y/N. In fact, it's quite the opposite.”

Raising your eyebrow, you wondered what was the opposite of hate? Like? Love?

“You... Like me? As a Friend?” You questioned, forcing yourself to force the word ‘Friend’ out.

Barry chuckled, shifting himself so his body was now facing yours. “Something more.” He whispered, leaning forward.

Suddenly, you found Barry’s lips on yours, his lips were so soft and you felt yourself melting into it. Slowly, with his hands snaking around your waist, he guided you up, to stand up.

Filled with confidence, Barry pushed you against the wall, giving you a kiss filled with love. With his hands tugging you closer to him, you raised your hands up to where his neck was. With one hand holding the back of his neck and the other on his soft, luscious brown hair, you tugged on them, Barry kissing you even deeper.

Breathing for air, Barry and you panted, looking at each other, with love and playfulness dancing in your eyes. Soon, Barry started kissing you down from your lips to your collarbone.

Sucking your collarbone’s skin, you moaned in pleasure, your hands dangling at your sides.

But soon, Barry’s lips were back on yours again, and you felt like you were taking in a deep breath of clean air, with some fireworks exploding at the back.

Suddenly, light flooded into the lift and both of you jolted up, your heads turning in the direction of the doors. While you were both so distracted in your kissing, you had failed to notice the lift travelling upwards.

Cisco and Caitlin stood at the door, their eyes wide, their mouths agape and a strong shade of red forming on their cheeks. “We... We... Uh... We’ll leave you two alone...” Caitlin stammered, turning on her heels and walking away, not before punching a fist in the air in triumph. Cisco gave Barry a smirk, giving him a thumbs up before following Caitlin, leaving you two alone.

Now that there was light, you noticed Barry’s lips were Y/L/C, obviously from you.

Rubbing the back of his neck in embarrassment, Barry coughed awkwardly and asked you, “Would you like to, maybe, go out on a date with me?”

Answering him with another soft kiss, your lips moved in sync but before it could get too heated, he pulled away.

“Is that a yes?” 

Laughing, you pecked him cheek, blushing a deep red and nodding your head.

[simminghippie]

Better Than This

Ep. 2: Dream it over Upon seeing where they will live for the first 3-4 months of her pregnancy. Cassandra seems uneasy while Beck is optimistic. There conversation replays in Cassandra’s head. *walks in* Ca: it’s a cottage B: It's…..COZY CA: Its small! B: Babe let’s make the most of it…Pretend it’s like it’s goldilocks and the three bears without the bears. Ca: Not funny! But I’ll try. B: Okay! I don’t know about you but I’m tried. Ca: not too far behind you just give me a few minutes. Oh? Beck! B: Yeah? Ca: Call Lo tomorrow she wanted to talk to you. B: I will *goes to bed* *pose* Ca: *thinking* How can I raise a baby when I’m still growing up myself! *replays beck and her conversation (bold word are prominent in her thoughts. bold and underlined word echo)* Ca: Beck I’m pregnant. B: you sure it’s mine. Ca: Winston and I broke up. over 6 months ago. I haven’t been with anyone else. B: Wow I’m going to be a dad but I’m still am going to need a DNA test Ca: But I’m not keeping the baby B: why not you were going to keep Boston’s. Ca: Boston is older and financially stable B: he’s employed by your parents he doesn’t have really have his own. I tell you what you abort that fetus we’re done. Ca:  Are you serious B: I’m dead ass Ca: beck you just got your own business bring in child is risky plus were only teenagers B: but why would you want to abort my kid when I’ve loved you since we were kids Ca: Really? Why me? B: Why not you. You’re the first girl I’ve dated that didn’t see dollar signs but that’s because we’re in the same elite circle. But beyond that you’re the first girl I ever took to watch Star Wars me Ca: yeah your pretty obsessed with that franchise. B:  you’re the first and last person I want to see and talk to everyday. To be honest everything I do is because of you. But more importantly you’re the one I’ve always dreamed of spending my life and starting a family with.  Maybe it is selfish but if you keep this baby and we don’t work there will always be this piece of you that I love. Ca: Maybe some sleep will help me clear my head and figure this out. *goes to bed* Meanwhile in San Myshuno Logan River starts digging for information from Boston about his relationship with Cassandra. Lo: You okay? B: I’ll be okay but something’s wrong with Cass. Lo: How can you tell B: I’ve known her since she was 10. That’s when Mom Dukes became her live-in nanny. And don’t forget we did date for 3 years. Lo: How old were you when y'all started dating cause her parents definitely did not approve. Bo: let’s see I was 17 and she was either 15 or about to be 15. I can’t remember if we started talking before or after her birthday. But the whole 3 years we was on and off. Why you asking so many questions about her. Lo: I’m just making conversation Bo: Well I don’t want to talk about her. Just tell me about that spa appointment for tomorrow. Lo: It’s just me she said we can have a spa day some other time. Bo: That doesn’t strike you as odd. She basically live in the spa, nail and hair salon. Not to mention her shopping addiction. That weekly stipend from her parents does absolutely nothing. Lo: How much is it Bo: $5,000 Minus the 3500 for rent Then we probably 500 to1000 at expensive ass market she likes Her hair is 150 About 60 for her nails And the rest is for shopping and that’s not enough. When we were dating I would give her money from my paycheck. Lo: why? Bo: That’s what I do when I get in a relationship. I take care of what I love. You get every other paycheck. Lo: really Bo: yeah $2500 That’s more than what most people I know make. Lo: That’s I think we should go out tonight Bo: What club Lo: Your pick! Bo: Love the sound of that! Over in Newcrest AnnaBeth and Cory talk about Cassandra’s situation. Co: Babes you have to stop stressing about this and take a mental health day. A.B: How can I! I feel like I failed her as a sister. Co: How? A.B: She has two months before school starts. It’s her senior year. You know your last year to spend doing dumb childish shit. Then there inauguration, homecoming, PROM! Things no girl wants to go to pregnant. Co: She’ll be okay. A.B: I’m sure of it Co: Me to but I meant to tell you i seen your best friend yesterday. A.B: Really? Co: Yeah she was with um….the celebrity best friends… um…. Dakota Forley &….. A.B: Tex Baker Co: Yeah how you know! A.B: I use to date Tex before I met you. Co: No need to explain. A.B: Okay…sot how do you feel about a double date for Valentine’s Day. Co: With Cass and Beck? Or Aiyanna and whoever she’s dating? A.B: Class and Beck so she can dress the way she likes before starts to show and can’t do shit or dress the way she like. Co: I’m with it. A.B: I’ll call her tomorrow and let her know Co: Sounds likes plan. I have few that I want to try out now. A.B: As long as we keep it down this time I don’t need the twins waking up. Co: I wasn’t the one moaning extra loud, now was I? A.B: It’s hard to contain myself with that thing you do. Co: Drives you up a wall every time. A.B: Not ashamed to admit it. But let’s see what you have in mind for tonight. *sex poses* *Sleep poses* Back to Logan River and Boston at karaoke bar Lo: Do karaoke with me please? Bo: Not tonight. K.D: I’ll sing with you! Lo: Dad? Dad! K.D: Hey baby girl! Why are you out this late and who is this? Lo: When are you coming home? K.D: Logan! I’m not playing who is this? Bo: Names Boston nice to meet you sir. Lo: He’s my boyfriend not that you would know or care. K.D: Let’s go sing and talk about this afterwards. Lo: Fine! *Does Karaoke with her dad* Bo: babe you were so good! *pose holding her in the air* Lo: Thanks *kiss* K.D: Aye son slow all dat  down and bet not be out here fucking my daughter. *chokehold pose Lo: Bo stop! Bo: Sorry babe, but who I don’t give a fuck if this pops or not. If he can’t take time oout f his day to spend an 1 hr or 2 with you then fuck him! K.D: I got something for you bitch. Just remember that’s my daughter and I will protect her from your bitch ass by any means necessary. Bo: What’s that suppose to mean K.D: Keep your eyes open baby boy! Lo: Dad! Stop it! Just accept the fact that he didn’t want to be with me! Bo: Who? Lo: Beck Bo: Your best friend && your other best friends boyfriend. K.D: Best friend? Lo: Yeah mom said that some guys you have to show them that you care as a friends and watch it blossom into a beautiful or chaotic relationship. Why are you pushing for me to be with him. K.D:You want me home right? Lo: Yeah! K.D: This is the way! Security guard: Y’all gotta go Bo: Fine by me I’m sick of how his punk ass is talking to you anyways babe . Lo: Bye Dad KD: Sleep with one eye open young Boston *goes home*goes to bed* [End of Ep. 2]

[lovelyparanormalbooks]

100 Truths Blogger Tag

Hey everyone! Wanted to do something fun here (while y'all 'wait' for my mega wrap up post to be completed oops) so I decided to do this tag! Stolen from the Mango Queen May @ Forever and Everly so definitely check her out, and her post is here. Anyway, without further ado, the tag!* *Still feel like I'm rambling though. Am I?

The Basics

1 What’s your name?

Cas; technically a nickname and unrelated to my "real" name but ah well.

2 Any nicknames or aliases?

Cath, Rose, and as for other nicknames too many to count/list.

3 Your gender?

Female! She/her.

4 Your star sign?

Taurus, even if it's not always obvious I am quite the stubborn one though mostly in subtle ways.

5 How old are you?

I mean, you can probably find that answer at least somewhere around this blog but I'm not gonna give it to you straight, but I am a teenager in high school, I'll give you that much.*

*Is this too cryptic? I really don't mean to be, it's just I'd like to keep it 'undisclosed' even though I've probably blabbed before.

6 Your relationship status?

Single; I've moved past the point in my life (intermediate/middle school and early high school) where I'd pretend it was "it's complicated" when that just meant about my friendships; lmao.

7 Any children?

Nope.

8 Any pets?

I mean we have like 19 chickens I think, by my last count? I'm not great at keeping track. But out of those there are the four which are most like pets to me, a black orpington and three blue orpingtons :)

9 Any tattoos or piercings?

Nope and I doubt there ever will be I'm too indecisive and why have piercings when the only thing I'd ever get pierced are my ears, and you can just have clip ons?

10 What do you like about yourself?

Uhh well I'm not one of those people who constantly puts themselves down so that's a start? (And I really don't mean any offence to anyone who is like that, I hope you start seeing what an amazing person you are! 3>

11 What do you dislike about yourself?

Lack of confidence on some occasions I suppose? I try to be more outgoing and I am a slightly more extroverted ambivert but I think in certain situations I just need to be more willing to take a chance.

12 Righty or lefty?

Right :)

Lasts

13 The last thing you drank:

Water. It's sitting in front of me slightly to my left as I speak :( (in case you haven't been able to tell I'm not a fan of water)

14 The last thing you ate:

An apple.

15 Your last phone call:

To a friend while I was walking to school, because when you're by yourself you get bored.

16 Your last text message:

Hoped it'd be something exciting, but nope it's just ":)" (minus the quote marks).

17 Your last email:

Sent email? To myself, a day ago, sending myself a resource for mock exams (sigh).

18 The last song you listened to:

Why would I remember, I'm not bothered checking but it was off my "pop ballads" playlist and pretty sure the song was almost over when the period ended and I stopped listening to music.

19 The last book you read:

Bright Thrones by Kate Elliott, though that is technically a short story... Oh well.

20 The last time you cried:

Ahh damn not a great story. In the car on the way home Wednesday two weeks ago, but that was really a chain reaction event which started around the start of lunchtime that day.

21 The last blog you read:

Forever and Everly!

22 The last person you spoke to:

A friend while walking to my dad's office where I am now.

23 The last place you visited:

School?? It is after school right now and I haven't gotten home yet...

24 Your last holiday abroad:

China! I mean more specifically Beijing as well as Shenyang, Dandong (the border with North Korea), Yuanjiang and Anhua.

Have you ever?

25 Have you ever gotten back with an ex?

That would require you to have one in the first place, so no.

26 Have you ever been cheated on?

Yeah no.

27 Have you ever cheated on someone?

No.

28 Have you ever lost someone special to you?

Luckily, no.

29 Have you ever been so drunk you threw up?

I have yet to experience the feeling of being drunk and don't think it's something I'd like to try anytime soon based on other peoples' accounts of it.

30 Have you ever fallen out of love with someone?

Yes?

31 Have you ever met someone who changed you?

Define change in this context? People I've met have definitely made me a better person though.

32 Have you ever been in a situation where you found out who your real friends are?

*long sigh* unfortunately too many times.

33 Have you ever kissed someone you probably shouldn’t have?

The sarcasm is back; that would have to require actually kissing someone.*

*Random fun fact: when I first wrote this response it was worded terribly, I think something like "have to require having actually kissed someone" which makes absolutely no sense at all.

34 Have you ever found out people were talking about you behind your back?

Yep.

35 Have you ever broken someone’s heart?

Not that I'm aware of. 36 Have you ever kissed a stranger?

See answer to question 33. 37 Have you ever had your own heart broken?

I don't know how to answer this one? No?? But, books, so yes?

38 Have you ever had sex on the first date?

Not an original answer but gee I'm underage and never been on a date! 39 Have you ever been arrested?

Gladly no, though this one time we did do something "suspicious" lol. 40 Have you ever been attracted to someone that isn’t the gender you usually find attractive?

Yes I think so. 41 Have you ever done something you regret?

Probably, though there isn't a specific instance that comes to mind. 42 Have you ever had a threesome?

No! 43 Have you ever embarrassed yourself in public?

Highly doubt I haven't though I don't remember anything in particular that was especially mortifying? 44 Have you ever misjudged someone?

Definitely, and I'm always very quick to correct myself afterward. I find it amusing when my judgment is extremely off though.

Your Beliefs and Opinions

45 Do you believe in God?

No thanks. 46 Do you believe in yourself?

Yes.

47 Do you believe in Santa Claus?

No but Santa is great.

48 Do you believe in ghosts?

Kind of? But not really. 49 Do you believe in aliens?

Eh, they could exist, doesn't really concern me? I don't think they're gonna take over the world but hey if they did it would probably be better than Trump being president? 50 Do you believe in miracles?

Yes, they're signs you're doing things right. 51 Do you believe in the power of positive thinking?

Absolutely. 52 Do you believe in love at first sight?

You'd think I wouldn't, but I do? Like I definitely think you have to get to know each other and all that but I think there is that sort of instant connection, but it's not always going to turn into love. 53 Can money make you happy?

It can. But it can also very easily make you extremely unhappy so there needs to be a balance. But if you're in a good place I don't see why an extra pay check is gonna ruin your life. 54 Would you describe yourself as a feminist?

To be honest I'm not a big fan of the word, particularly with the whole misconception of it being "women > men" etc; but I definitely support equality and would consider myself an equalist. (See this post; this is pretty much my viewpoint summed up.) 55 Are you pro-life or pro-choice?

100% pro choice. I don't think it should matter what your own opinion on abortion is; that's for you. But others should be allowed to do what they want with their body. 56 Do you have strong political beliefs?

Yeah I guess? I do try and keep myself educated about such things but I'm not like a political activist or anything. 57 Do you have strong religious beliefs?

No way. 58 What do you think the most important thing you can give a child is?

Freedom.

Right Now

59 Are you eating anything right now?

Nope! 60 Are you drinking anything right now?

Nah. 61 What are you listening to right now?

The satisfying (don't @ me) sound of a printer printing... but it just stopped. 62 What are you thinking about right now?

Feminism/equality, having a chat with friends about it. 63 What are you waiting for right now?

Waiting to go home; two minutes till work ends. 64 What are you most excited about right now?

My band is playing on a pretty big stage on Saturday so that's something! 65 What’s your pet hate right now?

Does this mean pet peeve? And nothing extremely specific right now except people with their stupid far right extremist views. 66 What’s your favourite thing right now?

Dunno. 67 If you weren’t answering these questions, what would you be doing right now?

Probably studying, whoops.

Firsts

68 Your first best friend:

Siân, love you girl.

69 Your first kiss:

Yeah nah, not happened yet. 70 Your first celebrity crush:

I have no clue, but probably Theo James? 71 Your first holiday:

China 2011 :) 72 Your first pet:

A beautiful grey chicken named Ash. 73 Your first regret:

Oh gosh this was awhile ago but way back in 2012 when the guy I liked moved away right after he *may* have found out I had feelings for him (not certain about this but hey I'll never know). 74 Your first job:

Basketball referee. 75: Your first childhood memory:

My first birthday party. I'm told I probably don't actually remember it and only know what I've been told of it and thanks to the photographic evidence though, which is probably true since I have like no memories before the age of eight.

Which would you choose?

76 Love or money?

Love, of course. I read YA.

77 Twitter or Facebook?

I use Facebook more because the lovely Twitter locked me out (much appreciated, not). But I prefer Twitter for sure. Facebook can be useful as band promo though so it's not all bad. 78 Hook up or relationship?

Relationship! Casual isn't really for me. 79 Dogs or cats?

Dogs. 80 Coffee or tea?

Don't like either, prefer hot chocolate but coffee. I actually have more tea but I don't like it very much. 81 Beer or wine?

People always laugh when I say this, but in my opinion beer tastes like slightly off sparkling water. Why would you enjoy drinking that? Red wine for sure. 82 Sweet or savoury?

Sweet :) 83 Introvert or extrovert?

Can I choose ambivert? Otherwise extrovert. 84 Vampires or werewolves?

This makes me instantly think of Twilight, so vampires of course. 85 Seaside or countryside?

Countryside, cmon. I don't like water much and I love country music. 86 Summer or winter?

Winter!! 87 Books or movies?

If you don't already know, I'm not a fan of movies at all and obviously books win. Books or tv shows though... That's a whole different story. 88 Horror or comedy?

Recently I admitted to some friends I've never watched an actual horror film and they were absolutely shocked. But yeah, comedy definitely.

A few random questions to finish on

89 Do you wish you could change your past?

Sometimes I do, but then I decide it's not that big of a deal because you know, the past is full of mistakes I've learnt from. The lessons are more important than erasing the mistakes.

90 What’s your dream job?

This is something I always get stuck on. Musician? Entrepreneur? Lawyer? Activist? Writer? Actress? 91 What’s your guilty pleasure?

$3 hot chips at your local dairy. OOPS.

92 What are you afraid of?

Disappointing people. 93 What was the first thing you wanted to be when you grew up?

No clue really but I think it was probably an actress!

94 If you could have any super power, what would it be?

I'd like to be able to fly, teleport, read minds, control time... You can tell I can't decide. 95 If you could change anything about your life what would it be?

I would like to live somewhere else, really, with a better education system... I shouldn't say that but still. You can't change your feelings *shrug*. 96 Would you want immortality?

I think it would be cool, especially if you had someone by your side. Immortality alone though... Not so keen. 97 If you could interview anyone alive or dead who would you choose?

I would absolutely love love love to interview Roger Federer. Why? Just because, it's Roger Federer so duhh. 98 Would you say you are happy?

Yes, I am grateful that I have a supportive family and live in a safe place. 99 What one piece of advice would you give to yourself at age eighteen?

Don't mess up your life! Kidding, but hey I'm not that age yet so I'll pass on this question. 100 Where would you like to be in five years’ time?

Ahh, five years... I'll probably be at uni, but ideally I'd like to be in the US whether it's to do with academic or music I care less. Well this has been an obnoxiously long post about myself but if you managed to read all of that kudos! Please tell me something most people don't know about you in the comments so I feel a little less self absorbed.