#y'all make it seem so hard to take a fucking screenshot.

[pagodazz]

stop using Evan Jennings pictures in your fucking habit/evan posts. how many times does this have to be said ITS ANNOYING. SCREENSHOT A VIDEO IM SICCCKKKKK. if you don't even feel like taking screenshots there's so many posted on Pinterest. I WOULD KNOW. I POSTED OVER A HUNDRED. I don't like to repeat this STUFFFF BUT EVERYTIME THERE'S A NEW FAN THEY PULL THIS AND IT SHOULDN'T BE HARD TO BE RESPECTFUL

[tirfpikachu]

this screenshot from another post actually really hit me hard

trying to make body dysphoria seem inherently worse than body dysmorphia is actually cruel. as someone who developed extremely severe body dysmorphia before dysphoria, i can tell you it's the #1 reason i started hating and harming myself and wanting to die at a young age. i would've 1000% gotten extreme facial plastic surgery to "fix" myself. and while for some it's their road to happiness, if i had it... it personally would've locked me into this fake version of myself, forever wearing a mask. and whenever i'd see someone looking like my past self, a haunting feeling would've come over me. and yet society was encouraging me to "fix" my perceived flaws. it was insanely normalized. it was seen as almost self-care, and a way to better my chances in life as a "prettier" woman. it really fucked me up. you CANNOT look me in the eyes and say shit like "women just want to xyz bc of beauty standards, it's not the same as my much worse severely debilitating dysphoria" without telling my younger self and other young girls that her life-threatening suffering wasn't bad enough, wasn't painful enough, wasn't as bad as anything a trans person goes through. it assumes so fucking much about dysmorphic people. don't brush us off so easily. don't put yourself as inherently in a worse situation when societal misogyny costs real lives. especially since for me, it came from initial bullying at a young age, like many other girls who hate their own bodies & faces. stop belittling our pain.

my dysphoria was very debilitating too, and made me a trans activist for life. but it did come with risks. i developed reverse dysphoria quite quickly after i started growing stubble, and now i'm stuck with that painful dysphoria until i can get expensive laser hair removal. if this is how transfems feel like about their own stubble, holy shit... i'm so fucking sorry. that's a truly horrible feeling. what i can tell you though, is that this is actually a cousin sensation to dysmorphia. dysmorphia & dysphoria aren't as separated as y'all might want them to be, which would make things must simpler ofc. but it's the feeling of visceral disgust, of your body not being good enough, not being you enough. that sucks to think about; we don't want to empower the transphobic crowd into thinking they can magically fix us all. and so, many activists and dysphoric people try to compensate by portraying them as experiences that are completely foreign to one another. as never being related or feeling similar at all, ever. but the thing is, as a previously chronically dysphoric & dysmorphic detrans chick, i can tell you first-hand that it doesn't help anyone to pretend that these aren't often comorbid disorders, and that they actually really do feel similar. and that's okay! no one should take all your treatment options away just because of that. that would be shitty, transphobic, and honestly ableist. but we gotta encourage ppl & their doctors to do due diligence (which my doctor and trans community didn't) and be open to everybody about the risk of regret, of reverse dysphoria, of things not working out the way we think they will. because all that at the very least makes detransitions less painful, even if you personally never detransition. detransitions can lead to very extreme self-hatred, and all the unfortunate consequences of self-hatred. it is a very vulnerable place to be in, and we want to prevent harm. more and more folks are detransitioning because of a lack of information and a focus on celebrating someone's transition early instead of giving proper information. the same should be done with dysmorphic folks - i am both a post-dysphoric and post-dysmorphic person. but many dysmorphic people cannot function without getting surgeries.

and while this is honestly tragic, as anyone needing to go under the knife at all is tragic in a sense... sometimes it is the only life-saving treatment option for the person. for me, i feel so fucking proud of my survival despite years of debilitating disgust at myself, my body and my face. both in a dysphoric and dysmorphic way. but i do not look down on anyone who did have to go through surgeries. i'm just happy to see them smile and feel good about themselves, honestly. but it is a bit bittersweet. how was it, before surgeries, to be dysphoric? to be dysmorphic? i want to read more stories from those eras. how did people find inner peace? did they, in the end? how many didn't survive? what did they have to say? i feel a strange sense of yearning, sometimes. heteropatriarchal society is really weird. it triggers dysmorphia in so many young girls & transmascs. it can also trigger temporary dysphoria in some people, and even permanent dysphoria. and just because certain societal things are a factor in your dysphoria doesn't mean you're lesser for it either - your suffering matters. just like dysmorphic suffering. hating yourself at all is so fucking painful. i wouldn't wish it on my worse enemy, or i'd at least strongly hesitate and they'd need to be an actual monster to deserve it. i love dysphoric & dysmorphic people so fucking much. i don't want us to fight eachother, or shame eachother for seeking treatments when things become too much for us to bear. we need to uplift one another. do everything we can to lessen these feelings in ourselves, of course, as a community of people who hate their bodies and place in society. but if someone chooses to cross over, to take hormones, to have surgeries... i just don't want them to regret it, that's all. and if they don't? if they're happy? i would hug them and breathe a sigh of relief as well. i'd feel bittersweet, almost nostalgic, because i've been there. people who haven't been severely dysphoric or dysmorphic don't fucking understand. hopefully they never will.

[going-to-ikea-for-the-fries]

why did you tag your post with gaz erasure my ass? like what was hard to believe that the cod fandom has blatant patterns of purposefully removing the only black character and replacing him with everyone under the sun? your friend lied about killing themself to make them look like a victim. and you participated in harassing people who saw this for what it was. you need to step back and reflect on your own self on why you thought that your friend’s “death” was caused by people calling out patterns of anti black racism and then go on to harass them. you are not an ally by any means.

Back when I used that tag, I paired it with another tag right after, it was meant to be an aggressive call out on misinformation, I had meant for it to read as 'Gaz erasure my ass, y'all just can't read'.

(This because the original post didn't read like intentional erasure but rather like codslut thought Gaz didn't fit the post, since she also didn't use Reboot Soap, she used *Captain* Soap, idk how best to explain it but to me the two soaps are different characters so i figured it was an intentional choice to use him and keegan rather than reboot soap and gaz)

Edit: I want to add that I also used codslut's own explanation as the basis for why I didn't think it was erasure. And at this point, she's clearly not to be fucking trusted, so it wouldn't surprise me if it really *was* erasure/racism and I believed her word that it wasn't.

As time went on, I dropped the last part of the tag of 'y'all just can't read', and looking back it not only reads as a racist dog whistle but also, just in general, sounds and looks fucking disgusting.

I've said this before, but I think it warrants saying again: I *didn't* mean to say Gaz erasure doesn't exist. It does very much exist in the community and even Activision themselves often erase Gaz from promo materials.

I'd hate for people to think that I either dislike Gaz or don't see the blatant racism/dislike/erasure that happens with him on the community. That's not the case. Gaz is a main character (unlike König like so many people try to replace him with) who I absolutely adore, and I call out erasure when I see it here on Tumblr, on Tiktok and on Twitter.

I never meant to make it seem like Gaz erasure doesn't exist. I only wanted to call out misinformation... and ended up doing the exact opposite of both my intentions. I'm sorry about that. It was not just disgusting but full on stupid of me.

I also want to say that I didn't think that that screenshot post specifically or even the act of people calling out racism where they saw it was the cause for codslut possibly killing herself. That is not what I meant at all. And I don't want anyone to think I blame @soapskneebrace or @glossysoap or anyone else for that. Blood was never on their hands, I want to make that very clear!!!!

When I was confronting people, I was doing so on the basis that they're big creators with big platforms and that by accusing codslut of racism/erasure they opened the door for anons to justify their actions when going after codslut because they have so much reach and people with bad intentions need less than that to justify the hate they send people.

Looking back, I know I was in the wrong for how I spoke. I was aggressive and rude and mean, and none of the people involved deserve that. Hell, my actions were hypocritical as hell and I probably opened the door for them to get hate themselves. I'm really fucking sorry.

If I could take it back, I would. I never believed nor wanted them to believe that someone potentially harming themselves was their fault. It wasn't.

I do plan on taking a step back to reconsider not just the way I acted but everything that's happened. In fact, I was already taking said break and came online only because I got word of @/fulltacs' post.

I appreciate and thank you for holding me accountable (and by that I mean you and everyone!). And I especially thank *you* anon for wording this ask this way, and giving me, at least, a chance to explain.

[feral-radfem]

I don't think it's helpful in this moment to no true Scotsman the screenshots. Nor do I think it goes against radical feminist principle to try to take part in raising the next generation of men to be non-misogynistic. If you think participation and activism towards radical feminism is inherently incompatible with motherhood then you are excluding most women from radical feminism. That is antithetical to the message of liberating all women, not having a child. Which is ironic, considering that most of the people that would make those comments online, don't do shit for radical feminism. The keyboard warriors of our social movement really don't need to be throwing rocks at glass houses.

I know this is going to rock a lot of y'all's worlds, but if we want men to get better the likelihood is that people with our morals are going to have to raise more men. Be more aware of what the sons we bring into this world read and watch so that they can influence the sons raised by tradwives and male supremacist.

What she needs is a community of women also dedicated to raising children well so that we can make an impactful difference. Which with the rise of voluntarily single mothers and co-parenting with their female friends this is happening. I don't see how raising children amongst your female support system with your feminist values is antithetical to feminism. I just don't. Yeah, I agree you shouldn't live with a man you're having a child with/by because they used them as a way of control women, but I say that like I say carry a knife on you. It's a precaution to protect yourself, not an inevitability, a concept I think online radical feminist spaces are having a hard time wrapping their heads around. Just having a kid by itself is not anti-feminist.

Women are going to continue having children. Either through their own choice or not, especially with the state of roe v wade, and it's our job as feminist to support women in vulnerable situations. Which motherhood inherently is. Not to ridicule and belittle a choice they can't go back and undo. What do any of you expect this woman to do? Throw her baby in the dumpster? How cruel are we going to allow treatment to living children in the name of radical feminism.

Let's be very clear here: the reason this mentality has surfaced around radfem spaces and has become so rampant isn't because the blackpilled girlies are taking over, it's because y'all have been increasingly pushing that male behavior isn't due to socialization but rather the bioessentialist reason that they're born like that. Meaning that we can never feasibly work towards correcting our misogynistic society because it's their nature. Therefore women who give birth to men are inherently birthing rapists and DV abusers when they give birth to men because y'all are so convinced it's an inherent part of their nature. Which, don't let me parse words here, is fucking stupid. It's defeatist nihilism and it ends up with you being a pessimist who can't treat people (women, girls, or boys) in a normal, rational, and humane way.

Why even try to be a feminist if you think there's no point? Why be a feminist if you only want to collaborate for liberation with women who think and act exactly like you do? Why even call yourself an activist if you aren't going to make the active effort of trying to make the world a better place for the girls who come after us? A lot of y'all's plan for feminism seems to be solely separatism then the annihilation of the human race which lacks all political feasibility and ends with y'all just being angry nobodies on the internet. Like I get the anger, but it's misdirected at the wrong target, and now you're part of the problem. I think people posting things like this need to step back and reevaluate why they're here. If they can't find a good reason to stay here and remain compassionate towards the women we have dedicated our time and effort to liberating, they should abandon the cause. At this point they are just detrimental to garnering support for our cause.

Why are radfems becoming so dogmatic?

How do you expect women to be receptive to your ideology if you constantly talk down to women who you don’t agree with?

[monstas1ut2]

2/3 Eren Yeager (Smut Warning!)

(๑˃ᴗ˂)ﻭ

That's why I fucked yo' bitch, you fat motherfucka!

The screenshot sound was pretty loud as your back went up and down like a roach sprayed with raid. The male on the other side of the phone laughing his ass off. Well, he wasn't the only one.. but he's the one who took the screenshot.

"Delete that shit, don't put it on Instagram Connie!" Your pretty face was immediately in the camera's view. Your eyes a little wide at the fact that you were caught off guard. But at the same time, you let yourself go in front of the group. That's your wrong doing. But it made them smile nonetheless.

The people who were on the call at the moment were Connie, Jean, and Sasha. The rest were either too bothered to be in such a crackhead group, or they were busy.. probably the first one. Anyways, everyone in first period happened to be your friend, they were all different but they adored you nonetheless... even Annie... she just hides hers pretty well. Anyways, It's almost the end of senior year already and the bond is hard to break..

"That's my favorite song, you can't be catchin a hoe off guard.." you scolded the bald male who still happened to be laughing. His controller in his hand since he was playing nba2k. Jean was also playing but at the moment he was trying to figure out what you were doing.. and he's mad he didn't see..

"What did she do now?!"

"She was throwing her back out of place!" Sasha muffled out as she was stuffing her cheeks with a Hershey chocolate bar. She was also watching Hell's Kitchen on her tv, you could hear it.

"Daddy Jean aint need to hear all that.." you playfully spoke as you bit your lip at him. It was obvious he liked you, not to the point where he wanted a relationship though.. he's just a bit of a man whore.

Though everytime you mumble a 'Daddy Jean' , he's all for it. That's yo bitch.

After a bit of a pause of talking, Connie had picked up his phone and you were now cleaning the table that was in your room. The last time you were in this room, you didn't even have time to clean... Your father was screaming for you to hurry.

Let's explain, this weekend, you are visiting Hange, your mother . She missed you so she invited you to stay for a few days. Today is Friday so you have the whole weekend with her. She had planned Saturday and Sunday. Not to mention, Monday is a holiday so no school. 

"Hey guys... uh Armin and Eren having a party.. y'all comin?"

All while Sasha said yes, along with Jean.. you were still jamming to 2-pac spitting his shit. Your hand movements not going unseen by the three on your phone. So in result of not having a response from you, Connie screamed oh so suddenly which caused you to jump pretty high.

"What the Fuck is yo problem!? You bein held by gunpoint nigga?" Your voice showing 1% concern as you moved closer to the phone on your dresser and you stared into it.. quite surprised still.

"(Y/n)... you makin my hair fall out..." Connie spoke as he gave a sarcastic smile and... wow it was hard for everyone to suppress their laughter... your face would turn purple instead of red though..

"Ight~... watchu want?..."

"Eren-"

"Oooh, Eren.." you spoke in interest, your long eyelashes fluttering. This however made Jean and Connie 'throw up' at the same time. All while you rolled your (e/c) eyes.

"Yall do too much-.. and Jean, stay in yo game ight?.. befo I come through the screen and punch-"

"Eren havin a party.. are you going..?"

Tilting your head in slight disbelief that Connie interrupted you. Your eyes rolled as you looked to the side. Obviously leading them on, but at the same time they knew that Hange will let you go...

"Fine. But somebody pickin me up.. and Sasha cuz boo-boo can't drive worth a dime.."

(๑˃ᴗ˂)ﻭ

As much as you hated it, you sat uncomfortably in the dodge... Ugh... It's just something about you and dodge's. The cars radiate fuck boy energy, and guess who happened to be driving this car? Jean..

Though he let you sit in the passenger seat just because. Your eyes staring out the window as you messed with the stockings you had on. They were in a bit of a web, that was the design. You also had on a plaid skirt and this crop top with some white platforms. Oh you looked scrumptious.

The person who put this outfit together in the first place was Hange.

"Baby Jean, you need a new car... cuz-"

"It radiates Fuck boy energy.. you said it the first time you ever saw it... I know.." Jean pouted as he continued to drive to Eren's house. Who was shared with Armin. The two always lived together, some speculated that they were... sparkle sparkle.. gay.. but they aren't.. not that you would've minded.. it just would've been a bummer.

"(Y/n)... Didn't Your father take your car away...?"

Glaring back at Connie, who was wearing a white shirt with black pants and some timbs. You rolled your eyes and looked through your window again.

"Yeah but my car is a Mitsubishi.."

The neighborhood around these parts were quite pretty. Just like where you lived with your dad. But at the same time you were confused as to how Eren and Armin could afford such a place. The first thing popping in your mind being. Drug dealer and then you thought about what Sukihana said about dating them...

That's probably why Levi didn't want you around him... Yeah.. This whole senior year has been Levi making sure Eren doesn't sit beside you... nor have a project with you... It's like he barely existed at first. Though you always had these ways to talk to him. He's not even that bad.. he's quite the hottie and he knows what to say... he's just a flirt, and you edge him on every time...

"(Y/n)! Can you come with me to find the food?"

Snapping out of those thoughts of Eren, you didn't even realize Jean had already parked. A small 'mhm' coming from your throat as you opened the car door. Everyone else doing the same. Lord it was a bunch of people out here. People were outside and inside which was baffling honestly.

A soft hand touched your wrist and started to drag you towards the house door. It was Sasha, her mouth almost watering for something to eat. She told Eren to make sure there was extra cheese in the fridge for her. Hidden... and lo and behold when you both shimmied through the crowd, the cheese was in the fridge. Her eyes beaming as she grabbed some chips as started eating like it was her last meal, nothing out of the ordinary.

"This music actually hits..." you spoke out to nobody in particular as your hips started to move ever so gently. Though as nice as your body was, it looked more seductive than anything. Popping one of those chips into your mouth as your hips continued to wine ever so gently.

The looks you were getting, not only lustful but want... The way your long dreads just complimented your look had only made it worse. The second you decide to stop, it seemed like everyone stopped looking at you. In slight despair that you'd stopped. Though one individual in particular was continuing to stare...

His hand, wrapped around the cup as he'd sipped at the liquid inside. The black ring on his middle finger caused his hand to look hotter than it already was. He had these prominent veins that would just look so pretty on your brown skin...

"She likes you too..." the blonde that was a tad bit shorter spoke to his childhood friend, Eren.

"What makes you say that..." lord, somehow over all this music, and his low tone... you could still feel the vibration of Eren's voice. Just glancing from the kitchen as Eren was sitting on the couch in the living room. Leaning back like he owned the place... well he did.

Fine ass..

Giving him a bit of a stare, your glossy lips curved into a smirk as you glanced at him up and down. All before turning your attention back to your friend who was having the time of her life eating...

"So Sash.. what's up with you and Connie...? Yall gon date.. or-"

"(Y/n)!"

"My bad.. my bad.. I just wanted to know"

The party was a bit lively, more than anything since this is a longer weekend. So everyone was happy.. including you because they were playing your favs. So of course your body started to move again. That skirt of yours being a paid actress in helping you look more hot. Though, what you did not expect was someone coming up behind you...

Now that's nasty..

You whipped your head around about to give them an earful... though... you saw that smexy... face and you looked kinda shocked...

"Oh..." you choked out before turning your head again.. Eren's evil little smirk had caught you off guard. It boosted his confidence even more that you didn't feel the need to even move away from him. His hands slithering onto your full hips.

Man, he was really risking everything this time... considering your father is.. Levi...

This however was thrown out of the window because of the fact that you could feel Eren's... crotch against that thick form of yours. That little smirk on your face only widening as you started to gently rub against him, your back bending over somewhat.

His long brown hair then started to ever so gently fall in front of his face as his greenish eyes stared hard into your body. That harsh little grip on your waist made you feel all different types of high. Gawd.

"You like that huh...? I know.." your cute, but seductive voice made Eren chuckle just a tad. It causing you to almost choke on those words.. This man didn't need to TRY to be hot... he was already smexy.

His hands then started to travel up your body to your arms and he gently pulled you up towards him, your back against his scrumptious chest. All you could do was open your mouth a bit, quite surprised that he wanted to be this close with you.

"Eren... You a lil close... you needa tell me sum?"

The way you spoke, the way you carried yourself... it was new to Eren when he first met you.. but he got used to it real quick and he noticed he wanted something he never knew existed.. and that was you.

"Can't tell you here... but I can tell you in the bedroom..." Eren purred out, his voice smooth as a babies skin, smooth as butter. It caused you to tingle, the female between your legs wanting that more than anything.

Biting your glossy lips, the room started to become hotter than it already was. The people who were in the house started to pile out of the main and started to go outside. It was quite cold outside as well, but the party continues.

"Where the hell is (Y/n)..." Jean spoke to himself as he watched Connie and Sasha become drunks in two seconds. It was obvious he himself could not drink since he is the driving parent tonight.. but he now had nothing to do... he's just wondering where... you are..

(๑˃ᴗ˂)ﻭ

"S-..Shit Eren~..."

The (f/c) nails you had were now digging into Eren's muscular arms as his lips caressed your neck. The seductive kisses making dark marks on your brown, beautiful skin.

Your head being thrown back onto the soft black pillow as your pretty toes curled. Feeling Eren's slender fingers inside of your pussy. His intimidating green eyes watching your every expression, every move. Seeing that your crop top was already rolled up over your pretty chocolate mound breasts that were covered with your bra.

"E-Eren, s-stahp..." choking that out, you could hear the loud rip of your stockings when Eren moved his hand out of them. The wetness of your brown pussy lips being known pretty well when Eren's fingers slid your panties to the side.

"You don't want me to stop... huh...?"

"N-No.."

The electricity shocked through you when you watched Eren stare down into your eyes. Lust and want, all in them as his key necklace dangled in front of your face ever so gently.

His shirt immediately being discarded as he watched your pussy pulse from his fingers being pulled away from it. It was amazing to him how much you wanted him.. it was amazing... it ran something through him...

All you could see was his muscular frame, his hands to match as he easily tore through your bra. Watching the way your breasts fumbled out of the cups. He never seen a black woman's breasts before.. but it couldn't get any better than this though.. is what he thought.

"Daddy~... don't stare at em..." you pouted playfully before licking your glossy lips. Just running your fingers up Eren's arms as you eventually made your way up to his luscious hair. Running your fingers through the locks. Pulling him down ever so gently to finally get that kiss you wanted.

Eren's eyes glowed when he felt your soft lips, the lip gloss giving him this taste of lovely. His lips tasted of some sugar, kinda made you wonder what was in his cup before this.

The wetness of Eren's tongue touching yours as the both of you withered in this naughty, sloppy kiss. Something you both weren't supposed to do.... It was fun, crazy... scary..

"You act all bad outside of the bedroom huh... but you ain't ever have someone touch you..." Eren teased gently, in a whisper against your lips. His hand gripping your chin as he stared at your innocent looking face. Gently spitting all nastily into your mouth and you moaned out seductively. Swallowing it so easily..

"Show daddy you'll be able to take it..."

Eren's cock was so hard in his pants, it being unzipped by him and his underwear was now restricting his release. His eyes staring at your pretty pussy, the wet, pink insides were bright and untouched. Though his pale cock was eager to invade it.

"I-.. I can take it daddy..." your whimpers echoed In Eren's ears as he pushed his underwear down. Your knees being pushed to your chest as you felt Eren's stare. The plaid skirt you had was still on, so you tried to cover your pretty pussy with it.

"Stop... don't hide now.." Eren scoffed out as he gripped under your thighs, the underside of his cock rubbing up and down your wet and gooey pussy.

"Hold your legs... don't move.."

It was so demanding, your pussy clenching already as the wetness dripped down to your other hole. Your pretty, long nails visible to Eren as you held your legs as tightly as you could. Knowing Eren's cock was a monster. You could see it... right between your legs.. right between your brown pussy lips.. the contrast was unbelievable..

"F-Fuck!! Eren~~ ow~" the way your painted toes curled gave Eren a shiver of excitement. Your back arching ever so slightly as your virgin hole was taken away from you. Squeezing tightly around Eren's experienced cock.

"Shh.. it's Ight.. take it babydoll.." Eren's whisper was gentle and sincere as his thumb started to gently rub at your clit. Causing you to swallow your spit, though it spilled out. What also spilled out is your loud whimper. Your legs staying wide open for him as your hand slowly slid up his muscular structure.

"It's .. i-it's so big..."

Hearing these whimpers and words spill from your throat, Eren couldn't help but take his hand and wrap it around your throat. Causing your breath to be taken away oh so suddenly when Eren snapped his hips forward even more.

"Fuck!" Your moan could probably be heard outside as your breasts bounced from the impact. Eren's smirk wide as he felt the tightness of your insides. His necklace going back and forth ever so gently as his pelvis started to clap against you. The feeling was so foreign to you, having someone ram into you like this. But it was Eren... it wasn't just 'someone'..

Your (f/s) scent was powering against Eren's own scent. The feeling of Eren's cock was starting to really take a toll on you..

"A-Ahgh..."

Eren's cock was being enclosed so tightly, you just wet up his Dick so well.. he was starting to become obsessed.. more than he already was.

"Daddy's. little. pussy..." his deep voice echoed in your ears as he started to get a bit faster. Your breasts bouncing even more as Eren made sure that skirt was moved out the way. He wanted to make sure to see everything. His hand squeezing harder at your throat. It was keeping you firm against the bed, like a little fuck doll...

"I-it's your pussy Eren~"

Curling those pretty toes again, you could feel the bubbles in your lower region. The craziest orgasm you've ever experienced... just tip toeing to the tippy top. All you could muster was a pathetic whine. Your eyes watering up behind your long eyelashes.

"I'm-.. I'm cumming..." Your voice was so weak, it sounded like you were passing out almost. Just rolling your eyes back as the bed frame started to hit the wall. Your pussy gushing more than usual as the white cum started to coat Eren's cock a little.

"Shit... yeah~..." Eren growled under his breath, watching you come undone on his pale cock. Your thicker form was just so adorable, looking all bent up. Your locs scattered around ever so softly.

It was like he was fucking a goddess...

Eren was between harsh and soft, his manhandling ways were shown easily by the way he pulled out quickly and turned you over. Your plump ass shaking like jello as his cock easily slipped inside once again.. filling you up for the second time. God you just couldn't wait till you could feel his cum...

"Imma Fuck you till you turn dumb..." Eren spoke harshly as his long fingers gripped at some of your locs. Pulling them and wrapping them around his wrist somewhat. Gaining all control over you and your own body...

He wasn't playing either...

(๑˃ᴗ˂)ﻭ Masterlist 2

[beigehearts]

Yandere adult trio: college AU These are drabbles for when they lose their mind and kill the people around you... and kidnaps you

These are going to be a little longer than usual but I hope y'all enjoy it as much as I did when writing it (also im trying out the beta version of the new posting system so lemme know if anything is weird)

Sorry this took me forever bro

CW: murder, blood, physical abuse, alcohol

Hisoka

It's getting quite annoying to be completely honest. He just won't leave you alone, constantly flirting and making passes at you. And yet at the same time he makes fun of you and is actually very mean. It wasn't so bad in the beginning but this is just getting out of hand. You made sure he was aware of this. ---- He's looming over you as he corners you against the wall. You refuse to look up at him, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of a reaction.

While you aren't looking at him, you can feel him looking at you. You already know he has that annoying grin on his face that makes you want to punch him square in the nose.

He brushes his long fingers against your face, making a quiet humming noise. "Are you ready to give up my pet?"

You ignore his words and slap his hand away from your face. "I need to get to class, move Hisoka."

He frowns though you aren't looking at his face. He opens his mouth to say something when someone from behind him calls out to you. "Hey y/n! Are you okay?"

She walks towards you but before she can get involved you shove the man away and huff. What a nuisance. You turn towards him once you're standing next to your friend and glare at him.

"Leave me alone. It's annoying and it's scaring people. Got it?" Before he can respond you turn on your heels and drag your friend down the hall by her wrist just hoping to put distance between the two of you. ---- You're pretty sure you made it clear that you don't want him near you anymore. But by now you know he doesn't give up so easily. One can only hope that he gets bored of you and finds someone else to bother.

You and your friends went out for brunch earlier, and all was well until Chelsea handed you something. She said that she found it in her bag but it was addressed to you, so you put it in your own bag.

You pour yourself a rum and coke and make yourself comfortable on the couch of your shared apartment. All of your roommates went out for drinks but you were too tired to go out.

After taking a sip of the sweet liquid in your glass, you examine the letter you were given earlier. It's a typical white envelope with your name written in pen. There's no address on it or return address so you assume it was just supposed to be handed to you.

You rip open the letter with your finger and pull out the singular loose leaf paper. It's folded in three sections so you pull it open. The handwriting is messy but in an aesthetic sort of way.

Dear y/n, I strongly suggest that you go to class 406B in the technical building tonight. Don't be late or you'll miss the whole party. 10:45 pm - see you then. I almost forgot, if you don't come I have some revealing pictures of you that I can share with anyone I wish to. XOXO

This is the strangest letter you've ever received. It's probably a prank by one of your roommates or friends. You've never sent nudes to anyone so obviously they're bluffing.

Though perhaps you should entertain your friends and go. Who knows, maybe there will be drinks. But you are tired... Maybe you'll just go to bed. You peek over to the time on your phone, it's 9:12 pm. Yeah, you'll just go to bed after you finish your drink.

'bzz' 'bzzz'

Who is texting you so late at night? You sit up and realize you fell asleep on the couch. You wipe the drool off of your face and grab your phone with distain for whoever woke you up.

It's a blocked number.

ur late

Late? Late for what? Your phone displays the time, 11:27 pm. Are your friends really this committed to their prank? They must be trying to get Tik Tok famous or some shit. Well you're awake now, you might as well head over there.

----

The moment you step into the building something seems off. If all of the lights including the emergency lights wasn't enough, the ground seems sticky. Though you can't bring yourself to use your phone flash light to see what it is.

Eventually you find the room 406B in the darkness. The door is closed and no lights are on in the room. It seems as if no one is inside. As you reach for the handle of the door, you notice something on the window of the door. You can barely make it out, but there's what looks like a hand print. You chuckle, this must be a prank.

Now feeling a little better, you open the door and step inside. It's too dark to see anything but you can make out some figures in the dark. It must be your friends thinking they're being sneaky.

You roll your eyes and look for the light switch, finding it and switching it on. You squint at the sudden light, and your eyes begin to focus. Which you wish they never did.

There is blood everywhere, on the ceiling, the windows, the floor, the tables... But that's not the most jarring part. Your friends are sitting in chairs, one of them sitting on the ground against the wall.

There is your friend Chelsea, sitting in a chair with her head tipped down. You can't even tell what color her clothes originally were, they're covered in red, a dark dark red. Next to her is Derick, he's sitting the same way except his head is tipped backwards. His eyes are wide and his face is left in permanent horror- expressing the brutality of his end. You can't bare to look anymore, you drop to your knees and cover your face with your hands.

You scream and scream until your voice is hoarse and throat is raw. You're left coughing while you are drowned by your own tears.

"Are you ready to give up yet?" A deep voice asks from in front of you.

You can't stop the flow of tears as you look up at this monster. He's also covered in blood, and some is splattered on his face. He wipes a thumb across his face in the blood, and brings it to his lips. Sobs rack your body, you can't even make sense of this.

Hisoka squats down so you're face to face and grips your jaw bone tightly in his hand. You can feel the now cold substance being rubbed against your jaw by his fingers and it makes you want to puke.

"I got tired of waiting for you." His grin is nauseating, forcing you to stop yourself from puking.

His nails dig into your skin, mixing your own blood with that of your friend's. He brings his face close to yours and in a gentle but menacing tone he croaks, "Let's stop this childish game, alright y/n?"

Illumi

It's easy to miss things when you're caught up with the rush of classes and friends and love. All of the parties and hangovers are enough to satisfy your needs for entertainment and drama in this boring life. If you didn't fill up your daily life with these acts, you would probably sleep every day away until you fell into a coma.

To put it short, you're a busy body. And busy bodies don't have time to stop and look around at what is happening. For example, how were you to notice the key under your doormat was missing, or how your dresser drawers were left slightly open when you know you closed them before leaving. Noticing these small things are definitely not on your agenda.

It's 10 am, Saturday, and you don't have any classes or work today. You're sitting at the kitchen bar, drinking coffee and chatting with your roommate. It isn't often that you have a free day, and sometimes it is nice to have even if you want to get moving. The sun is peeking through the curtains and the aroma of espresso beans is a delight. It's a bit chilly so you have a blanket wrapped around your shoulders. What a peaceful morn-

'BANG BANG'

Your roommate eyes you when someone bangs on the front door, already knowing the events that are about to take place. She rolls her eyes and stomps up the stairs to her room, not wanting to get involved. You always feel bad that your roommates have to listen to this but you're really not sure how to end it.

You take your last peaceful sip of coffee and call out, "Come in!"

Before you can even finish your sentence, he storms inside and slams the door behind him. Your boyfriend of course is mad about something you've done. He trudges towards you and moves the stool next to you out of the way, and leans towards you so his face is next to yours.

"Are you kidding me y/n?!" He yells in your ear, but you don't flinch because you're used to this.

He rips his phone from his pocket and shoves it in your face after pulling up a screenshot. It's a conversation between you and his friend.

"Can't you learn to shut your damn mouth? This is our business and you have no right to tell anyone about it!" He's practically seething with rage.

You take a last sip of coffee and set your mug down on the counter. You continue facing forward and not facing him. "It's not our business, it's yours. And I asked him if it was true that you were cheating on me." You turn your head towards him while grimacing and mutter, "Again."

Ah but you've just lighted a bomb with your words.

His face has gone red and he looks like he's about to explode. You begin wondering why you were ever attracted to him.

"Maybe if you weren't such a prude! I can't even kiss my girlfriend whenever I want, it's ridiculous. You know full well that you're so... so... Ugh! You know what? Fuck you!"

As quickly as he came, he runs out of the house, slamming the door once again.

You whisper to yourself, "Fuck you too."

God he's such a child, you don't even want to be with him anymore. But every time you decide to break up with him he suddenly becomes Mr.Perfect. "I'm so sorry." "I love you." "Let me make it up to you." And then he does make it up to you only to tear down all of his hard work.

----

It's been a few days since your big fight with your boyfriend. He hasn't talked to you at all but this isn't uncommon for him. You promised your roommates that you would break up with him, not just for yourself but for the sake of their peace and quiet.

You texted him a few times while you were at work but he left you on read. He's so petty. So you text him one last time.

Come 2 my place at 8 tonight, We need to talk

He answers immediately which surprises you.

Can't, flat tire Come to my place

It doesn't make a difference to you where it is so that's fine. You wonder if maybe he's come to terms with the fact this needs to end. Hopefully so. If there's one thing you want him to be mature about, it's this.

Your shift ends at 6:30pm. You drive home, shower, get dressed, eat something and get ready to leave.

You send one last text,

OMW

It's read immediately but there's no response. Well, it's not like you expected much from him anyway. You drive to his house at 7:45 pm, and arrive around 7:58 pm. All of the lights in his town house are on. He's a few years older than you so he has his own house due to somehow being able to hold down a job. With his anger issues it's hard to believe that he can hold onto anything. Damn, he really is an unattractive person isn't he?

You step out of your car and lock it. Now that you're out of the car you realize that it's very quiet. This is unusual for when you go to his house, normally you can hear music or the sound affects of a shitty video game. But it's silent. Maybe he's waiting for you? He must be taking this well.

You step up the creaky stairs of the house, and knock on the equally as creaky door. No response. Maybe he's sleeping? You peek into the mail box and take out the extra key for the house from it. But when you go to unlock the door, it's already unlocked. This is becoming very strange.

You push open the door and peer into the dark living room. It's not too dark that you can't make out the furniture in the darkness. You step inside and shut the door behind you, it's still quiet. Not quiet, absolutely and undeniably silent. You flick the light on and look around again, nothing seems out of place. It's messy, with empty beer cans and bottles on the ground per usual. The stains on his carpet remain untouched, including the vomit stain in the corner.

"Jay?" You call out into the still atmosphere. Nothing. Is he not home? That can't be, his car is in the driveway.

The sound of his old floor boards being stepped on echoes through the house. What the hell is he trying to pull? You look up the stairs, but it's only darker up there than it was down here. He must be drunk.

Each step you take up the stairs, your heart begins to pound faster. Something feels off, this doesn't feel right. This isn't like your boyfriend, he's simple, he wouldn't try scaring you like this. On the top step, you feel your shoe touch something soft. You lean down and pick it up, and raise it up to your face. A pair of thongs that definitely aren't yours. So that's what's happening. He couldn't even pull himself together for one night.

Your pounding heart is no longer caused by fear but anger. He's cheated too many times to count on your hands, but this time makes you angrier than you've ever been. He's never been in bed with another woman knowing that you were coming over. This is fucking ridiculous.

You stomp towards his room and kick the door open. It's dark but you can tell that there are two people in bed. Your vision has gone red, you've never been this angry in your life.

You don't bother turning the lights on, you storm over to his side of the bed and rip the covers off. Just barely you can make out a woman sleeping next to him. You grab his shoulder tightly and shake him violently to wake him up.

"Get the fuck up Jay! Get! Up!" He doesn't respond, you lean down and yell in his ear like he always does to you. "You're such a childish piece of shit!"

He still doesn't move or speak, for fuck's sake. You stomp back to the entrance of the room and flick on the light. You turn around and begin walking back towards the bed, when you're stopped in your tracks.

Everything is red, but it's not your vision anymore. The bed has been dyed red, and his naked body is covered in it. Your mouths falls open but no screams come out. The woman next to him is splayed out on the bed, naked as well. Covered in red. You look down at the hands that touched your boyfriend, they're also red.

You rush over to the bed and shake your boyfriend again.

"Jay? Jay! Can you hear me?" You put your ear to his chest but you don't hear anything. You put your finger under his nose but don't feel anything.

"Hey! Hey! Wake up! This isn't funny!" Tears stream down your face as you pull him to your chest, cradling him.

Your sobs make it hard to speak and your chest begins to hurt. "J-... Jay... This- isn't-" You gasp between each word, "Funny..."

It's only when you hear a noise coming from behind you that you stop to think about what's going on. It doesn't matter to you though, they could kill you too if they wished.

"People are strange." You turn your head to see where the voice is coming from.

It's someone you don't recognize, he's tall, pale, has long hair, and hypnotizing eyes. Your sobs cease for a moment and you hug your boyfriend tighter to you.

"All of that fighting... You were even coming here to break up with him and yet... You're sad that he's gone?" He makes his way towards you slowly, "I've done you a favor, haven't I?"

He looms over you but all you can do is stand there, frozen by fear.

The man grabs the back of your shirt and pulls you violently from Jay. You try to run back to him, but the man pulls you to him, hugging you tightly. No matter how much you flail in his grasp you can't get away from him. You're left sobbing into his shirt, your body limp in his arms.

"Why?" You manage to whisper.

He holds you to him with one arm and pets your hair with his other hand. "You were miserable. He was making you miserable."

He sighs and kisses the top of your head. What is going on?

"Come on, don't waste your energy on human garbage. I'm here, so it's fine." He states it so 'matter of fact'.

"Who?" Is all you can ask, unable to finish your question.

"I guess I haven't introduced myself yet. Illumi is my name." With ease, he grabs you by your shoulders and lifts your face up to his. "Your future husband."

Chrollo

What more could you ask for? You already have easy college classes, fun parties, a good part time job, great friends, and an amazing best friend. Tonight you're going to hang out with a bunch of friends and have drinks at one of their apartments. It's a pretty normal Thursday night, nothing odd about it.

You're waiting for your best friend to pick you up, he's always there to pick you up on the dot. If he doesn't come early that is. You shove all the essentials into your bag and hear a honk outside. Must be him.

But of course you're always tardy. You lace up your shoes and run out of the dorm room, tripping out of the building. He's watching as you stumble towards the car since one of your shoes is already unlaced. When you finally flop down in the passenger seat he shakes his head with a knowing smile.

"Oh y/n, will you ever be organized?" He asks with amusement.

You click your tongue and straighten out your clothes, "Don't ask such stupid questions."

He turns his body towards you as much as possible and pats his lap. You instinctively know what that means. You hike your foot up above the console and put your foot on his lap. He begins tying your shoe, his smile is unmoving. He's always smiling.

"Chrollo, you don't need to baby me." You roll your eyes and groan.

He laughs and pats your leg, signaling that he's done. "If not me then who?"

You swing your leg back over to your side and buckle up. The two of you hang out a lot. Since you're both going to the hangout tonight, you decided to car pool. But first you're going to go get the alcohol. Everyone has to bring something for everyone, that way you guys can get wasted with no qualms.

You plug your phone into the aux and play your shared playlist. The first song that comes on is "The Cult of Dionysus" by The Orion Experience. Something that he added.

Finally you feel like you can relax, it always feels that way around Chrollo. His presence is just, comforting, in every way. You feel like you can do anything, say anything, ask for anything. He's always there for you with no exceptions and honestly you think you may have feelings for him. But it's a question of are you confusing comfort and friendly affection for romanticism. It's just that he's so perfect, he doesn't have a single flaw. Not one that you've ever seen at least. You probably never will see one of his flaws.

You sink into the seat and sigh.

He looks at you out of the corner of his eye, but quickly looks back at the road. "What's the matter?"

"Oh nothing... Just, everything is good."

He knows you better than anyone, so it's an obvious lie when you say this. "But what?"

Anytime he calls you out, you surrender and tell him everything. "Everything is so great you know." He nods with your statement. "I go to a good school, have good friends, have a good job." This has been on your mind for quite some time.

"Something is missing, you know? The excitement, the... the..." You chuckle and turn towards him and put up jazz hands, "The pizzazz!"

He doesn't turn to look at you but you know he saw you when his smile widens. "I get that. Maybe you just need to step outside of your comfort zone. Do something different."

Do something different? Yeah, maybe that is what you need.

----

All eleven of you are sitting in a circle on the ground, drinking and playing never have I ever. You take a long drink of your Mike's hard lemonade, which is just something to get the night going.

Dina wipes hair from her face and smiles, "Okay okay my turn. So never have I ever.... Uhh." She pops up when she thinks of something, "Never have I ever jumped out of a window."

DJ leans forward and raises an eyebrow, "Okay what kind of window we talking? High up? First floor?"

Dina answers, "Any kind, any kind of window." The majority of you put a finger down which makes the group burst out in laughter.

Your friend Zoey finishes off her bottle and slams it down on the floor. "Let's play something else."

"Like what?" One of your friends ask.

Zoey thinks for a moment, "Like... Truth or dare, spin the bottle. Or maybe eleven minutes in heaven."

Dj interjects, "I think it's seven minutes in heaven, not eleven."

"Oh whatever DJ, they rhyme." Zoey spits back.

Lex answers, "Let's play seven minutes in heaven!"

Of course DJ huffs and rolls his eyes, "What are we? Middle schoolers?"

Guac (which is his nickname) speaks up, "Oh come on, are you shy DJ?"

Finally the quiet Chrollo sitting next to you says something, "I'm not really interested. Right y/n?" He looks at you to back him up.

The group coos at the two of you and someone says, "We get it, you got something going on. The game is just for fun, don't be so serious Chrollo."

Chrollo opens his mouth to say something but you cut him off, "Hey, you told me to do something different. Maybe this is the first step."

His face shows betrayal and you feel a squeeze in your heart.

He stands up and glares at the group, "Whatever." He storms out of the apartment, and everyone mumbles to each other. Chrollo has never acted like this so this is quite a shock to everyone.

In order not to kill the mood you speak up, "Alright, let's pull names out of a hat!"

All of you write down your names on a small piece of paper and put it in a baseball cap. Dina pulls two names out of the hat and of course makes it a dramatic event.

"Alright so first we have the most lovely of people..." She looks at the group like a teacher waiting for an answer from her class. "Gracie!" Everyone claps and she stands up in front of all of you, taking a bow.

Dina pats her thighs rapidly, "Drum roll please!" Everyone obeys her, "The next hot piece of ass is y/n!"

You stand up and curtsey, taking Gracie's hand and leading her to the closet. Dina stands in front of the closet once both of you are inside and grins, "Timer starts now kids." She shuts the door on you two and all of your friends cheer from outside.

Here comes the awkward part. It's too dark to see her expression but you already know she's blushing.

You lean towards her and in a low voice so no one else can hear say, "We don't have to do this if you don't want to."

She shakes her head, and you brush a hand through her dark coils. The both of you giggle when your finger gets stuck in her hair. She leans in for a kiss, but before your lips meet you're interrupted.

The front door is opened and slammed shut, you hear the lock click as well.

"Hey Chrollo, you feeling better?" "What are you doing?" "Holy shit, please, what are you doing?!" "Are you fucking crazy? This isn't funny!"

Something slams against the closet door and Gracie yelps.

"Whoa whoa, we can work something out." They sound desperate "Back up!" You hear a loud thump and then screams. "Grab him guys!" It sounds like people are running around, but soon the screams become not those of only fear but of pain. There are gargled pleas and pathetic whimpers for mercy.

You and Gracie hold each other, gripping onto one another for dear life.

Soon the screams, pleas, thuds, gurgling, all of it ends. The apartment goes quiet and you try to silence your heavy breathing.

There's a loud thud right in front of the closet and then the doors are opened abruptly. There Chrollo is, covered in blood, and you can see the bodies of your friends behind him. Before you can react, he pulls Gracie away from you, slams the doors closed and there's another thud.

Gracie's screams are blood curdling, screeches and cries for help. You try to open the doors but something is blocking it, keeping them closed. As her screams get louder you throw yourself against the doors, trying to push whatever is there out of the way.

Before you can even imagine of getting out, the screams fade out into whimpers, and into nothing.

Holy shit holy shit holy shit.

You're given no time to think when the doors fly open and you're face to face with Chrollo. He's blocking out the light and his usually neat clothes are crumpled and bloody. You look down to his hands, a sledge hammer hangs from his fingers, dripping with your friend's blood.

"Ch-Chrollo... Please don't." You whisper.

The sledge hammer drops to the ground and he wraps his arms around you gently. "Oh y/n. I would never hurt you."

He's so gentle with you, so gentle. It almost makes you forget what just happened, because he feels like home. "Why? Why did you do this?"

He steps back and grabs your shoulders, he leans down so he's eye to eye with you. "They crossed a line, a line that should not be crossed."

You begin to speak but he grabs your cheeks with one hand and dawns his usual smile, "You don't need them. You have me." He kisses your squished lips as if it were normal. "Right y/n?"

Slowly you nod, you don't need them. If Chrollo says it, it must be true.

"Good girl."

[stylesluxx]

flustered – h.styles

[warnings: minor swearing, sexual talk but in a joking way (no smut), and maybe a little angst if you squint]

summary: in which harry gets flustered around y/n | famous!reader

word count: 2,251

masterlist

Being a popular singer and songwriter was something you always dreamed of. Since you were nine, you had a journal of songs that you planned to perform in front of a stadium of people. You already had your costume designs picked out in your head along with how you wanted your stage to look. Music was your life and even if you couldn't become a successful singer, you knew you still wanted to be in the music industry somehow.

But life turned out exactly how you wanted it to due to your hard work and dedication. You started by putting your music on SoundCloud, where you started to grow a fan base. You made music that so many people could relate to and you made people feel like they had a shoulder to cry on. Eventually, you were doing small concerts and interviews, just to get your name out there some more. And before you knew it, you were releasing your debut album and receiving award after award. From AMAs to Billboard, to iHeartRadio, you were on fire.

But you knew you were being heard worldwide when Harry Styles followed you back on Instagram. You had been following him ever since he was in One Direction, a group you held very dear to your heart. Once they went on hiatus, you kept up with Harry's music and watched him develop as an artist. And you'd never tell him this to his face, but you were a proud fan.

It was the day after the AMAs and you were laying on the couch in your living room, scrolling through your comments and thanking fans for giving the album a listen when you got the notification.

Your jaw dropped open as you shot up from the couch and let out a scream. Your left hand shot up to cover your mouth once you were done screaming.

"No fricking way!" You gasped and took a screenshot before sending it to the group chat with your two best friends.

y/n: gasp!

emily: no way

sarah: ugh now you can shoot your shot

y/n: ... no

You went back to Instagram once your phone buzzed once more, making your eyes widen.

harrystyles: Really enjoying the album! Much love. H

You had no idea what to do or what to even say. You were completely star-struck. Sure you've gotten compliments from other artists but you didn't admire them as much as you admired Harry.

You took a screenshot and switched back to the Messages app, sending the picture to your friends.

y/n: y'all...

sarah: yeah he definitely wants to eat your ass

y/n: sarah...

sarah: y/n...

emily: omg, marry him !!

y/n: what do I say????

sarah: uhhh thank you ???

emily: be chill but not too chill. grateful and kind but not desperate

You switched back to Instagram and stared at the message in front of you before sighing and typing.

y/n_y/l/n: thank you so much for the support! fine line and self-titled have been on repeat!!

"I can't believe that just happened," You mumbled to yourself and fell back on the couch, completely elated.

— It was seven months after the Instagram encounter and you and Harry haven't spoken since. You figured it was just an artist complimenting another artist's work and it meant very little to him. He probably already forgot it had happened but you thought about it constantly.

You were waiting for your order at a coffee shop in Los Angeles when you were bumped hard. The bump almost knocked you down but you were quickly caught by the culprit, his hand on the bottom of your back, pushing you back upright.

"I'm so sorry," He apologized and looked down at you.

"No worries," You shook your head and gave him a small smile.

"You're Y/N Y/L/N, I believe I dm'd you a few months back. H-how are you?" He asked, taking you by surprise.

You had already turned away but this man recognizing you made you face him once again. You looked at his face (which was hard to see since he was wearing a hat that sheltered his face).

"Oh, Harry!" You smiled cheerily. "It's wonderful you meet you in person. I'm well, and you?"

"I-I'm great," He nodded eagerly and you took the moment to take in his face.

His green eyes pierced into your Y/E/C eyes before quickly looking away, looking anywhere but at you. And his cheeks were bright pink as if he'd been caught doing something he wasn't supposed to be doing.

"That's good, the BRITs are coming up-"

"I-I actually have to go," He interrupts you.

"O-oh okay. Sorry for holding you up," You nodded and plaster on a fake smile as he nods and walks off.

You bit your lip and scrunched your eyebrows, internally screaming at yourself. That was so awkward and cringe and you just wanted to forget all about your coffee and run home. Your legs wanted to run to your car, hop in, speed all the way home, and just jump under the covers and forget you even existed. But the BRITs were coming up and you had to be on a plane later.

—

Walking down the red carpet was something you'd never get used to. That and paparazzi. You didn't like the bright lights and people yelling at you, telling you what to do. But you did love showing off your outfits.

You were wearing a strapless black gown that showed off the perfect amount of cleavage, and diamonds that decorated your ears and wrist. You were feeling confident and beautiful and your last encounter with Harry was pushed to the very back of your mind until you arrived at your seat.

Harry was already sitting in his spot at the table. He was wearing a light blue button-up that was covered by a purple wool cardigan but that too was topped off with his brown suit. He looked very handsome and now you were worried that maybe what you were wearing was quite basic.

But you didn't have time to turn around and run away, because he had spotted you and was pulling at his collar nervously. You gave him a soft smile and seated yourself, rubbing your sweaty palms in your dress.

"Hello, nice to you see you again," You greeted him.

Your heart was racing erratically and you were pleading to yourself not to fuck this up.

"The pleasure is all mine," He smiled and you felt the heat rise to your face. You figured it was the same heat that was adorning Harry's face also.

The conversation quickly ceased and you internally sighed, ready to tell your group chat what a failure you were. But you were back to being smiley and happy when a cameraman came over and asked for a picture of the two of you. Harry wrapped an arm around your waist and you leaned into his side with a big cheesy smile.

The show started and a producer came over to Harry mid-show, telling him he should get ready for his performance. He nodded, stood up, and pushed his seat in.

"Good luck," You bid him before he could walk away.

He beamed at you and nodded in appreciation before walking off to follow the producer backstage.

He came on stage in a completely different outfit. A white lacy button-up with matching trousers covered his body and was complemented with a pair of matching gloves.

You enjoyed the performance, especially the water on the stage, and you made sure you told him once he got back to the table. Now he was wearing a bright yellow suit and a purple shirt, completely hard to miss.

"Your performance was lovely," You told him once he sat down. "I liked the water bit."

"Thank you. You're up next, correct?" He asked and took a sip of his water that was untouched until now.

"Yeah, just a bit nervous," You admitted and gulped anxiously while standing up.

"Break a leg. Well, not actually. Do people even say that anymore-"

"It's okay, I get it," You giggled at his flustered demeanor. He was completely red and was playing with the rings on his fingers. "Thank you, Harry."

Your performance went swimmingly and soon you were back at your seat, anxious for the award you were nominated for.

Apparently, it was noticeable how nervous you were because Harry hesitantly reached over and rested a hand on yours.

"If they don't think you're the best International Solo Female Artist, then screw 'em. I think you're the best," He assured you, making your nerves cease.

"Thank you. You're truly a delight, which I'm sure you've been told."

Before he could respond, your name had been called, making you face the stage with wide eyes. He rubbed your hand before pulling back and clapping along with the rest of the crowd.

You told from your seat and walked over the stage, not quite sure how you got there because everything seemed like a daze. But it became real when the award was placed in your hand and you had to give your speech.

"I am... in awe, truly. I am so happy and grateful. This album was absolutely life-changing for me and I hope it was for those who gave it a listen. I really cannot believe I'm here right now. Thank you so much to everyone who's been supporting me. I would like to thank my family and my team for all their love and support. And before I go, I'd like to thank Harry Styles who actually has been a huge inspiration of mine and he's so sweet and was literally just soothing my nerves. This night has been so great and this award was the icing on the cake. Thank you so much and goodnight."

You watched Harry's face turn bright as he smiled up at you and turned red for the thousandth time since you've met him.

You walked backstage and let out a sigh of relief once you got away from all the cameras. It wasn't as nerve-racking as you thought it would be but maybe it was because Harry gave you a pep talk before your speech.

You were pulled for pictures before they finally let you go but the show was over by then.

—

You were far too exhausted to be at the after-party but you already sent in an RSVP. You were wearing black leather pants with a matching halter crop top and basic black heels.

You usually attended parties with Sarah and Emily but they were back in L.A. working their regular jobs so they couldn't come. You quickly became aware that you didn't know anyone here you were you disappointed you didn't drag your manager along.

You were seated at the bar sipping on a Shirley Temple and bobbing your head to the music when you were tapped on the shoulder. You turned around with a smile on your face, ready to befriend whoever, but your smile only grew more when you saw the man in front of you.

"Harry!" You cheered and pulled him into a hug. "You don't know how happy I am to see you. I don't know anyone here and it'd be rude for me to leave not even an hour in."

"I'm happy I found you. I only came because I knew you'd be here. Kinda just wanna listen to Stevie Wonder for the rest of the night," He spoke honestly and his eyes showed vulnerability.

For once he was red but you could tell he was putting himself out there. He wasn't dressed up in a fancy outfit; some loose jeans, a striped red and white t-shirt, and all-white vans.

"That sounds lovely!" You agreed. You turned around and took one last sip of your drink before facing him once again and hopping off the barstool. "Shall we?"

Harry's apartment is almost exactly how you expected it to be. It was organized and clean, everything about it seemed untouched and perfect but it still had a homey feeling to it. It still invited you in and asked you to stay awhile. It was so welcoming, you forgot about how you and Harry going home together was going to be plastered all over the blogs.

"This is really nice," You expressed as you looked at the little aloe plant on his coffee table.

"Oh thanks, my mum got it for me. Thought it'd teach me some responsibility and it hasn't died yet so," He spoke with humor and let out a soft chuckle at the end.

You grinned and watched as he walked over to his record player, an old brown wooden one from the 90s. He took am album from his shelf where it looked like he had been collecting all his life and took the record from the sleeve. He gently placed it down and set the needle on the record, smiling as “Never Dreamed You'd Leave In Summer” floated gracefully throughout the room.

"This is one of my favorite songs," You hummed as you listened.

Harry slowly walks over to you, hesitantly placing his hands on your waist and you wrapped yours around his neck. You both swayed back and forth in each other's arms as the song played uninterrupted throughout the living room. You rested your head on Harry's chest, mixing the song and his heartbeat together, growing even calmer at your serene surroundings.

"Better than any party."

[qingxintea]

➼ chongyun || hiraeth

tw: mention of knives (no violence), kidnapping, explosion _______

you angled your camera to catch your face and upper body correctly and adjusted your blinds for the correct lighting. you put thin pieces of yellow and pink paper over your lamp to give off a sunset lighting sort of aesthetic in your minimalist room. your tiny cacao tree sat in the corner of your room, setting some sort of simple beach vibe.

then, you began to stream.

you watched as majority of your followers came to view as you sat in your rolly gaming chair. the greetings came rushing in and you noticed two of your friends had came along too, xingqiu and chongyun.

"hey gang, it's kingexplosionmurder here with your weekly sunday stream," you smiled and watched as comments came in asking you to notice them. beginning to select randomly, you flicked a short strand of hair behind your ear. "you have been noticed, yourlocalsugardaddy," you blessed them. and you swore you chose randomly.

on the other side of the screen, chongyun's face slightly flushed before eating his popsicle again. yes, that was his username, selected by xingqiu after the guhua heir was somehow able to trick him into selecting so. the situation must've been that he accidentally consumed some jueyun chili's, that was also xingqiu's doing.

he watched you smile as you explained your schedule for this stream, when he noticed you suddenly began laughing. it sounded genuine, he wanted to believe it was genuine, but there was a trace of disappointment in it. he observed your face, noticing you were looking at the chat box. "i agree too, scarymoose."

scarymoose: this streamer's kinda dog shit ngl 😐

by instinct, his fingers grazed over the keyboard as he analyzed the tone. this kid wasn't joking around with himself, he was really out to bring you down. he exhaled, shaking his head, wondering how you would deal in the situation.

yourlocalsugardaddy: miss karen this isn't yelp 🙄

he wasn't content with that yet, things could've gone onto more serious matters, but he knew you liked to keep your chat clean and peaceful. you went to the farther extents to keep that from happening, agreeing with rude comments yourself as a said joke, but actually have it sometimes harming you.

so chongyun tried his best to keep you happy.

redrumreaper: yo moose chill 😳

he recognized his friend xingqiu also trying to calm the situation as you just laughed it off and attempted to continue, sooner enough just beginning to ignore all his comments. some other viewers came up to your defense but in all honesty, you wanted to move on.

"s-so, i found some silk flowers outside of wangshuu inn yesterday, aren't they pretty?" you took a tiny bouquet of the said silk flowers and presented it to your viewers, holding it next to your cheek. the pink tone of the flowers matched the color of your cheeks and made for a nice picture. chongyun would've screenshotted it, but he respected your privacy.

yourlocaldumba$$: yes they're so pretty we love you 😍

13lue13erry: yes ong ong 💕 thiccer than my granny

Straw13erry: don't bring madame ping into this 💀💀

colino: are you sure it's alright to take from someone's legally owned property ?? much less from their garden

Straw13erry: u mean ur neighbors don't harvest ur flowers every day? 🙄 privilege spoke 🤚

yourlocalsugardaddy: vv pretty 😳

redrumreaper: simp 💀

you slightly choked over on your side and xingqiu calling chongyun a simp, for you. quickly clearing your throat, you regained your composure. your viewers could see that your cheeks had been dusted with a darker shade now.

13lue13erry: 👀

Straw13erry: 👀

yourlocaldumba$$: 👀

redrumreaper: 👀

sireluck: 💀

bazinga: 👀

dandelionn: 👀

poetichoe: 👀

"okay- anyways," you pushed that aside, watching the chain of 👀's coming in. you weren't too sure at what they were referring to, but just assumed that they were interested in xingqiu exposing chongyun. but, there was no way chongyun really felt like that, right? it was just a friendly compliment from what you believed. "just a tiny flex but y'all guys, i am so cracked at apex, not gonna lie. for all the new followers out there," you randomly commented. 'and to change the subject.'

"actually, you know what? fuck the schedule, let's go to trolling little eight year old kids posting selfies on instagram. due to certain reasons i'm just not gonna be blurring their usernames out, but please don't spam these people, i don't wanna be cancelled 💗" you sweetly smiled as you pulled up instagram and started streaming on your phone.

of course your sus notifications ruined it 🤡🤡

because xingqiu took advantage of the situation, sending messages to your discord. nothing mentioning your romantic life because he knew better than that, but just trolling. 'HEY GANG. ITS ME, TONY, AND TODAY WE'RE GONNA SEE IF IM FASTER THAN THIS MOUSE TRAP.' 'TURNS OUT, I AM NOT FASTER THAN THIS MOUSE TRAP.' 'AN UPDATE, IT HURTS. ALRIGHT. BYE GUYS.' you tried hard to contain your laughter, but certain giggles came out in the end, giggles that made chongyun's heart flutter.

xingqiu just kept spamming without a stop, to the point that you accidentally clicked into the notification instead of someone's username on a selfie post. so now everyone could see your group chat with xingqiu, chongyun, and a few other viewers that were actually your other friends.

13lue13erry: oh no 🤡

Straw13erry: 🗿

yourlocaldumba$$: HAHAHAHA WE'RE EXPOSED 🤡👌

just water support boy 😔: image.png

oh my god he's sending chongyun catboy edits. you made this concerning noise, glad no one really seemed to know who chongyun really was on twitch. you went back to instagram, beginning to dm a random kid, ignoring the situation that had just happened.

chongyun choked, slight heat running to his cheeks. what the fuck was xingqiu doing- how did he even get those pictures? maybe it was that one time xingqiu forced him to go to a furry con, but how did he ever get the time to photograph these? he nervously fidgeted and played with his fingers.

13lue13erry: 🤡

Straw13erry: 🤡

yourlocaldumba$$: 🤡

redrumreaper: 🤡

<— oraoraoraor

kingexplosionmurder: chav check

oraoraoraor: what

kingexplosionmurder: chav: check 😹😹

oraoraoraor: bruh

oraoraoraor: who tf are you

kingexplosionmurder: hope you like baddies cause i'm bad at everything 💗

oraoraoraor: bruh ok i'm blocking

kingexplosionmurder: stop dming me

oraoraoraor: 😐

kingexplosionmurder: stop dming me

oraoraoraor: wtf

kingexplosionmurder: stop dming me

oraoraoraor: wait wait UR that one twitch streamer?

kingexplosionmurder: stop dming me

oraoraoraor: ig ur fans gonna be so disappointed in you

kingexplosionmurder: stop dming me

oraoraoraor: hahaha wtf i'm gonna post this and tag you

kingexplosionmurder: stop dming me

afterwards you sent a barrage of really cursed images and left the person on read when they tried to complain and get a reaction out of you. you chuckled, extremely satisfied with yourself. this is what your viewers followed you for. you went on hunting for another user, "GO Y/N GO" filling up your chat.

you were just about to dm this other kid until you heard a ring from your doorbell. "oh what the fuck, i didn't invite anyone. but you know what, i'll pull something up to entertain y'all guys while i'm afk." searching on youtube, you typed in 'banana fish ep. 1' and clicked on the longest video you saw. then you got up from your chair, making your way to the front door.

you didn't mute yourself before because you thought there was really no need to, and you underestimated your mic sensitivity. god did you wish that you could go back and time and do just that.

twisting the doorknob, you opened your door and was met with... a certain, someone.

someone that you recognized and has caused you so much pain, and it was all so fun and games before they had to come along. "bruh. aight what you here for fam?" you played it super chill, though you were really sick and tired of this person's shit.

"(y/n). we need to talk," her stern voice made you flinch as you just stared straight into her eyes. you simply nodded your head and crossed your arms, shifting your weight onto your right leg. "we're thinking of taking you back home."

your froze, your breath hitching as you just stood there, waiting for her to go on. clenching your fists and looking down, you stayed silent for a little moment and questioned, "...why?"

"well, you have a stable income source, right?" she asked, putting her hands on her hips. "you can finally be of use to us," she clasped her hands together, a bright smile on her face. your finger twitched, awaiting an explanation. "you're a streamer, yeah? so you can be a useful asset to our family name."

"...you only want me to come back so i can make you all seem... good?"

and here you thought, just for a second, that you would be accepted back into the place where you really belonged. your shoulders slumped, as small tears began to well up in your eyes. "and for our profitable gain of course, it would be a shame to not acquire that from you."

you composed yourself and looked up. "im afraid my profit can only cover for one person, and it would be myself that i focus to make a suitable and independent living out of. you've kicked me out ever since i've graduated from college and had me fend for myself, now inviting me back once i have a stable job?" you breathed, fiddling with the sleeves of your black hoodie.

"oh, not inviting, dear. taking."

confused by her words, you let your guard down as she suddenly pushed a warm cloth over your mouth as you let out a constrained scream. you tried to break free of her grasp, reaching for the switchblade in your pocket, but the drowsing chemicals from the cloth took control of you and you felt disoriented. "you... bitch..."

your head hit the floor.

》●✿ time ● skip ✿●

silence.

thats all you heard when you awoke.

pure, unfiltered silence that overwhelmed you as you were completely lost. what was happening?

you tried turning to the other side of your childhood bed, the moon casting light shadows into your 'room'. there was a rope around your wrists you noticed, so you brought them up to your lips and starting gnawing on them until it broke apart. (guys we feral its not a furry instinct ok?/ ??  ?)

the material had irritated your skin, but you put that aside for now. escape- thats what you really needed to do. it was fairly dark, but you didn't have a good estimate of time. the analog clock was broken and set to a different time that displayed 11AM. you sat up, your fingers running along the frame of the window next to you.

for a moment, you stopped, thoughts rushing into your head. what if you could start a whole other life here where things could finally be peaceful, what if you didn't have to feel so isolated anymore, what if you could- ...

no. (y/n), get yourself together. what has happened will anyways stay there, and there is no healing scars. ...still, you couldn't shake off the feeling of missing this home so much when you had an amazing childhood, though full of fake actors who had manipulated you.

opening all the cabinets silently, you grabbed things that you assumed would come to your aid. a tiny backpack, which you then stuffed with other things around it. a first aid kit, a spare knife just in case, along with a clean oversized sweater and a couple dollar bills. all that, along with a compass.

you turned towards your window, stepping on your bed.

pushing open the sides of your window, your stepped on, the brown coldness of the frame coming in contact with your feet. you shivered just a little bit before stopping to think. what would you do once you were out of here? you barely knew your way here. and not to mention, your devices were still left at your other house, so there was no way of contact.

...

did your stream ever end? even if it did, had you muted yourself before leaving? no, you didn't, and you could remember in precise detail. someone out there, anyone, would be willing to help, right? you couldn't possibly be here forever, not when you're basically blown up all over your socials?

your friends, yes, your friends! xingqiu and chongyun were watching the stream and had made obvious interaction in doing so, and they'd be willing to protect you. if they just had a lead...

but... what lead was there? all they heard was the woman's voice and, that was probably it, wasn't it? only a voice with no other clear features that could identify her. it looked like you were doing this on your own.

you came in contact with the blades of grass tickling your feet and conveniently found a pair of sneakers outside. it definitely wasn't yours, and it smelled like the scent of your old room. most likely, it belonged to someone from inside your house, lavender and mint, but who inside there was in the age range to wear modern day sneakers..?

brushing that question aside, you unhesitatingly laced them on and they were just a bit too big, but you could manage.

you breathed, inhaling the freedom intertwined air, a much needed factor of bringing you back to your lost sense of happiness. then, the fear struck you once again, because you needed to improvise now. you needed to run, but which direction? you barely knew this place at all.

you dug around your pocket for the compass you had and it was pointing east. you remember that stepping out of your house was facing west, so you were going the right way... but who knows how messy the path was? it couldn't have been an exact pathway, but going directly ahead was your simplest option.

you heard a pair of footsteps coming from inside the house, probably a few seconds away to opening the door. you sucked in your breath and ran, ran as far as your legs could take you. your intimidating speed and played into your advantage, and taking one last look, you saw the lights on, before continuing.

a few minutes into it, you felt some elemental energy. it was a sense you learned to develop since you were young, giving you the upper hand in a variety of situations. you followed the trail of glowing lines, the air starting to get colder and colder. you shuddered, the crisp coldness nipping at your skin.

you sat below a tree, taking your backpack off your shoulder and took out the oversized sweater. you put it on over your black tee and light blue skinny jeans, its nostalgic aroma filling your sense of smell.

it was... warm.

it shouldn't be warm.

the warmth proved as a sign that someone had worn it before, but this size was from what you knew, too small to fit the woman you came across again, and you absolutely did not recall any other beings within the house. it was a small household.

suddenly, you remembered what she said.

we're thinking of taking you back home. you can finally be of use to us.

plural. you should've noticed it before and you shook your head, slightly disappointed in yourself. you didn't remember any other birth siblings. could it be the fact that during the time, they had, in a way, replaced you?

you sat up, then suddenly went drowsy. your eyelids were getting heavy as your back hit the same tree. ah, that clever bitch. you chuckled to yourself, but still unsatisfied how this was gonna end. reaching inside your pocket, you grabbed a bomb that a little kid gave you, and threw it as far as you could. it wasn't as far as you hoped, but it was exceptionally far considered your sleepy state.

in a few couple seconds or so, it was going to explode. you did that to divert the attention of her and slowly ran as far as you could. a few seconds in, you gave in, hoping that your efforts were enough. 》●✿ perspective ● shift ✿●

chongyun heard an explosion.

he raised his head in the direction smoke was coming from, and made a run for it, then stopping to think. no, you're smarter than this. he gathered his shit together and remembered that one day klee gave you a bomb. he deducted that you had used it as a diversion, and began to search around the area.

and finally, he came across your sleeping body. to ensure your living state, he crouched down and let two fingers travel across your neck, searching for a pulse, and was relieved when he found one, pulsing at a normal rate.

he then carried you on his back, picking up the pace since he deducted someone was out for you, would you need a distraction. he remembered some details of the woman, she had ended your stream with your sleeping form in her hands, a dirty smirk coming across her lips. she had dark hair with some natural highlights, but that was all he saw because the rest was concealed by a cloak.

a few minutes, maybe half an hour later, you began to stir. chongyun decided that he ventured far enough to liyue and slowed down for your comfort. he wanted you to get some well deserved rest. but slowly, you woke up, but only the tiniest movement was made. your eyes were still droopy and you wanted to return to sleep.

but the sight of pastel blue hair kept you from doing so.

you felt the familiar silk coming in contact with your arms as he kept on trudging forward at a more consistent and smooth pace. "..chongyun?" you muttered out weakly, earning a small smile from the male. he hummed in response, continuing forward.

your mind was cloudy, unable to interpret the language of the world. but softly, words effortlessly escaped your lips, "... did i do the right... thing?" blinking multiple times, you awaited his answer.

"yes, yes you did," his soft voice reached your ears, making you smile a bit. you nuzzled deeper into his shoulder, clinging onto him tighter, unwilling to let go.

"thank you," you whispered.

he chuckled a bit before responding, "anything for you."

_____

bro ending is a little off because i'm wrote this at 2:53AM and so my brain has went ⬇️⬇️ also i'm just hungry

copy and pasted from my wattpad,, @ppeachtea_

[sotorubio]

hi if it’s not too much trouble do you mind elaborating on the post about the cinematography being better in s7? bc i 100% agree and have been thinking the same but also haven’t really been able to articulate why? like if someone asked me this anon i wouldn’t be able to give them specifics but i KNOW it’s different. sorry 😅

it's definitely not too much trouble i already know this is gonna be long as shit bc i have so many Thoughts on the matter

it is indeed p hard to articulate so i'll give some examples & comparisons n share my thoughts based on that!

first i think it's important to recognize the context of a show like skam. it is made to represent every-day teenagers who might enjoy but not ever relate to characters & stories on some fantasy/murder mystery shows abt teenagers. the very core of skams is realism n accuracy to real life. we as the audience are not only supposed to be onlookers of the events we're meant to feel connected to the stories n relate to the main characters.

skamfr has some VERY beautiful shots if u look at them independently. if someone just showed me a screenshot of one of them i'd be like wow! that's stunning! but that's not what i'm supposed to feel when it comes to skams. if i go watch an artistic full length movie at the theaters i Do want to see beautiful shots that look like art n have a lot of symbolism behind them but when i watch skam i'm supposed to think "that could be me. that looks like my life" i'm not a lowly spectator who could never have such a beautiful life but instead the audience should see their lives directly put on screen.

skam france has been rly consistent w it tho! it's been their brand since like season 3.. but it did get worse in s5 & 6 i think bc they started to try too hard for original storylines. i think it's very intentional n if they were making another show i wouldn't say it's bad rly (altho sometimes it is that too bc they try too hard fmgjkd). out of context a lot of their cinematography works bc they usually tie it into the plot to represent the events but they just picked the wrong style for a web series. like babes u are not submitting this to the academy pls chill.

now let me introduce u to the most despicable shot in skam history (in my humble opinion)

HELLO??

now before anyone says. yes i know this sequence of shots has a purpose. this is exactly what i mean that if it was some other show w different goals it wouldn't be such an issue bc yeah this looks great right? it's a "sensory clip" we r supposed to "hear" what it's like to be deaf n specifically what it's like for arthur. but.

let's put this into skam context. we as the audience should see ourselves in arthur, not necessarily entirely but we should feel he's just like us, a teenager w his own unique struggles & life experiences. now tell me, when u feel depressed or sad or have had the worst week of ur life n u must drag urself to the shower... is this what it feels like? first of all do u take the shower in the fucking dark???? just for the aesthetic?? do u stand DIRECTLY in the middle letting the water hit u exactly on the top of ur head forming a symmetrical shade on u while u just... stand there. do u feel like ur ascending in the shower as u dramatically raise ur chin literally what the actual fuck is this. don't get me wrong sometimes u just actually do stand there doing nothing bc u just feel so horrible but that's not rly the feeling this clip awakens?

this leans a bit into the romanticization of arthur's season which wouldn't be as bad (still cringy but not as bad) if arthur had already accepted himself at this point but no he's basically suffering in the shower n we are looking at him like wow that's so pretty. let's imagine how we could make this clip feel more real n how we could actually see ourselves in him here:

stop making ur main characters of the season the main characters of the world. just bc arthur is feeling terrible doesn't mean the whole world imitates his feelings. in a symbolic movies masterpiece it would but not in a concept like skam. one of the worst things abt feeling terrible is seeing how the world just goes on around u. imagine how real it would feel like if he was in the shower w the generic yellowish light on that a lot of bathrooms have. we could see his silhouette slouching in the shower through a shower screen. or maybe a shot similar to the example pics but the ugly lights are on n the water is annoyingly dripping in his eyes & he doesn't look like they're trying to give him a halo n make him into a jesus archetype. the bathroom would look the same it looks on a rly happy day or a boring day bc this day only sucks for arthur n the universe isn't gonna come to his house to give him a cool background bc of it

same w this comparison

two underwater shots, both rly pretty & heavy on symbolism but the other one is literally waiting for those "this looks like a renaissance painting" comments n the other is rly pretty but still looks like real life humans who r not doing a photo shoot for vogue. which do u find more relatable? which situation makes u think Yeah that's real life?

like look at this camera position of "barely above water" this is like.. almost "ugly" but it's so fucking real n probably closest to the feeling of a first person point of view shot that u can get to

now the s7 camera decisions seem sooooo much better compared to all this. they have a lot of time to still make super dramatic shots that distance the viewer from the story line but so far so good. maybe they'll pick this up again to make the world revolve around tiff as she faces hardships but let's hope not 🙃

i genuinely love this shot like it's super down to earth & feels real but they have still easily kept in the symbolism. like tiff is literally putting walls between others n herself. jo feels like she's literally talking to a wall. tiff feels alone & secluded even tho someone is in the same room as her. yet they didn't have to make it look like smth out of an obscure indie film whose purpose is to have the audience in awe instead of representing them.

yeah the first person point of view of jo going in and out of frame while doing sit ups mightve been weird or cringy but 1. that's skam for y'all & 2. i'll choose that any day over arthur ascending like jesus in the shower.

[askmerriauthor]

Star Wars: Visions thoughts and discussion

Been on a bit of a Star Wars binge lately. Getting ready for the Book of Fett and the return of The Mandalorian soon, just finished playing the Jedi: Fallen Order game, and recently "Star Wars: Visions" dropped on Disney+ (not to be confused with the, like, half-dozen other Star Wars properties that use "Visions" as their title). If you've got the streaming service and haven't watched the series yet, I can honestly suggest you should do so. The whole thing is a series of very short episodes and is entirely non-canon to the setting, so you don't even need a hard understanding of Star Wars to enjoy it.

In fact, it's actually better if you don't know anything about Star Wars going in. Spoilers and brief episode discussion after the jump.

Episode 1: The Duel As soon as I saw a lightsaber umbrella and a R2 droid in a hat, I knew this one was going to be a must-watch.

I REPEAT. LIGHTSABER. UMBRELLA.

Solid kick-off for the short series. Dig the aesthetic, dig the classic samurai vibe (even if it's more of an homage than a direct application of the style), dig the simple story. The particular animation style they chose here was a little wonky but I quickly got used to the visuals and loved a bunch of the design choices too much to care. This one was very action/style-focused and clearly chosen as the leading episode for that reason, which I don't fault them at all for.

Episode 2: Tatooine Rhapsody I'm sorry, I don't recall giving Star Wars permission to be this fucking adorable, how dare you.

The tale of a Padawan survivor of Order 66 who makes a new life for himself not with the power of the Force, but with the power of Rock and Roll and Friendship. Bitchin'. Super adorable, semi-chibi art style that's honestly ringing, like, a dozen different bells in my head for trying to figure out all the different styles it's drawing from. Good fun, if a bit bland in the end. The biggest problem is the music. The story relies on "using music to save the day", which is fine. But when you use that trope you need an absolutely face-melting banger of a performance, which this just doesn't have. An enjoyable entry all the same though. Not bad, not great, cute designs; the quirky story of how Jabba the Hutt got a new slave band to play at his den.

Episode 3: The Twins This entire episode is animated by the team who brought us Kill la Kill and that should really tell you everything you need to know.

You know how if you get a bunch of little kids together, they'll start playing make-believe games where they just invent stories and plot twists and super powers like "I have whatever you can do, but infinity plus 1 better!" shit like that? That's what this short is. It has only the vaguest allusions to the setting proper and immediately hurls every semblance of consistency, logic, and sense out the window with both hands. It is 1,000,000% style over substance.

Okay, y'know what, no, that's not enough to describe the utter insanity this episode is. All I can find online is pictures of the main villain character pulling a General Grievous impression or the protag snaring lightsaber whips on his lightsaber, but that is fucking tiddlywinks compared to where this episode goes.

There is a scene in this short where the protag, who is ghost-riding the hood of his X-Wing upside down in space without a space suit, super-charges his lightsaber into a giant rainbow of FUCK YOU GEORGE LUCAS with the power of familial love and fabulousness, using said rainbow super saber to CUT AN ENTIRE STAR DESTROYER IN HALF WHILE ACCELERATING TO HYPERSPEED, all to save his twin sister's life by making her explode in a somehow non-harmful manner.

This short is utterly nonsensical drivel and yes I would like more right the fuck now, please and thank you.

Episode 4: The Village Bride Wait, we're actually trying to tell a reasonable story in this series? Sorry, I was still on a sugar high from the previous episode. Lemme sit down.

The Village Bride is great. Excellent short that's just dripping with atmosphere and a slow, purposeful pace to its writing. It's short and sweet with little focus on the Force-using characters themselves, which actually serves to its credit. Even in the Star Wars universe, the Ainu people can't catch a fucking break. Easily one of my favorites in the whole run.

Episode 5: The Ninth Jedi The fact that two characters in this short have Sasuke's haircut was extremely distracting. But I actually really enjoyed this entry overall.

Despite playing extremely loose with the established lore around how lightsabers work, this episode over all others really embraces the original setting and tells a slow-burn story about the potential revival of the Jedi Order. A little meandering at times, but it's a solid piece and well worth exploring. Of all the shorts in the series, this one has the greatest potential to actually continue on as a standalone series or be folded into the canon franchise. Main protag is an adorable bean and I love her.

Episode 6: T0-B1 This episode is simultaneously a love letter to Astro Boy and a giant middle finger to Star Wars lore purists.

The tale of an imaginative Droid named T0-B1 who dreams of becoming a hero like the Jedi he's heard so many stories of. This short gets extra credit for being so unyieldingly stylish and charming. On the surface of its presentation and story choices it seems like it doesn't know anything about Star Wars lore, but it's actually packed full of some pretty deep cuts that show the folk behind it do know what they're talking about and just don't fucking care what purists have to say. The entire thing is just "Yeah, I'm ignoring your lore, but I'm doing it in a fun way that makes the setting more interesting, and I'm so genuine about it that you can't be mad at me". I can respect that. Plus the old dude in that screenshot is an armless Jedi who's retired to be a botanist and that's just fucking cool.

Episode 7: The Elder I'm Episode 1, but better.

This one. This shit right here. This is the good shit.

I'm sure y'all have heard before that Star Wars is directly inspired by Kurosawa and samurai films in general, but The Elder really digs into that hard. Where Episode 1 styles itself after a samurai tale, Episode 7 is a samurai tale. Subdued, methodical storytelling, slow-burn pace, charming dialogue amid believable characters, and a truly intimidating villain who provokes a brief but striking duel. This is my vibe. I crave more of this. Far and away the best short of the entire series.

Episode 8: Lop and Ocho Oh for fuck's sake, there's going to be so much porn of this bunny girl character, isn't there?

This entry is another that kind of meanders with the story it's trying to tell and plays very loose with the lore. It reimagines a lot of what we know of the Jedi/The Rebels and Sith/The Empire into a feudal faction-based conflict akin to what you'd see in a period samurai drama. Modernization and callous industry crushing the spirit of the people and breaking apart families. A decent work overall, but nothing really all that impressive in the end. It takes too long to get going and then peters out halfway through its pay-off for some reason.

Episode 9: Akakiri The fact that I had to look up this episode's name and scenes online and still could not remember anything about it should tell you a lot.

The series ends on a downer with the dramatic tale of a fallen Jedi who sacrifices himself and succumbs to the Dark Side. Turning evil for... the greater good? Wha? Had some pretty neat visuals, but I genuinely cannot remember a damn thing about this episode or its characters. Big swing and a miss in terms of impact.

[nanonkorapat]

eyes and wyel

I said "please don't make me do this" and then y'all had the audacity to make me do it, so here we all are.

So in this in depth rant analysis I'll discuss the way the concept of eyes/staring/looking is handled in where your eyes linger (you can find all episodes here, in case you missed it). You see I'm not really good at this and I've never written a post like that before, but I just can't stop thinking about it.

Anyway, let's start with a quick mention to the title of the series. As we all know the eyes are the window to the soul/a mirror of our heart (if you don't actually believe this, then this post will have no meaning to you). You see, I always found the fact that you can understand so many things about someone just by looking at their eyes very fascinating. But what does it mean when your eyes linger at something or someone? I feel like the most obvious answer to that question is that it shows desire or even love. That's it, you just can't tear your eyes away from that someone. You don't want to lost sight of them, not even for one second. But I think it can also mean something else. Have you ever really stared at someone because you were just trying to understand them? As if, if you stared long enough they would give you the answers you want, as if everything would be magically revealed.

I think in wyel, it might also be that case, alongside with the feeling of desire. I'm not saying Tae Joo and Kang Gook don't really know or understand each other. But I feel like they have both created in their minds an image of the other that might not be entirely accurate. Tae Joo will flirt with Kang Gook and Kang Gook will stare at him and think "Why? Why is he doing this? What does this little brat want now? Can't he see that it is killing me?" and Kang Gook will ask Tae Joo a favor, to not try and seduce him, and Tae Joo will stare at Kang Gook and think "Why? I don't understand. Why is he reacting like that? Why does it always feel that too many things are left unsaid? Why do I feel this anger and jealousy inside my heart? Does he feel the same way? Talk to me Kang Gook, talk to me, talk to me". What I'm trying to say is that some things are very hard to say out loud. Maybe sometimes they are trying to find the truth, to communicate, to understand each other by looks and touches.

And let's not forget what Kang Gook said in this scene.

Aside from everything else, this is still Kang Gook's job. It is a master/servant relationship and Tae Joo is the only one who can't or doesn't want to see it. Kang Gook doesn't even have the freedom to look away, even if he wanted to. Even if what he is seeing is causing him so much pain, he can't look away. Of course, he might be using his job as an excuse to keep looking at Tae Joo. But in that scene we can also see how much he dislikes this situation. As I said on another post, he doesn't feel free. He isn't even allowed to make simple choices about his life. And as we now know they have been together for 15 years. He has been basically living as a shadow his whole life. But he can't look away now. He can't free himself and he is probably drowning in a pit of self loathing for that.

This is already getting too long and we haven't even talked about any of the actual episodes yet. I apologise to the 10 of you who will actually read this, but that's me! I ramble a lot.

Okay so when I started writing this I was planning to comment on some scenes from each episode, but as I was watching it again and taking screenshots, I noticed something interesting. These boys look at each other so much. Like a lot. Of course it’s normal to look at the person you are talking to, but they look at each other so much, even when they aren’t talking. If they are in the same room, they will look at each other. I can’t really explain it, you should see it yourself. It’s easy to see the difference when Kang Gook is on a date with Hyemi. They don’t look at each other as much as Kang Gook and Tae Joo look at each other. And I don’t mean only when Tae Joo comes and Kang Gook keeps stealing glances at him. Even when they talk or eat, they just don’t spend the same amount of time staring at each other. One might say it is because they just met. Well yeah, but also, just go and watch it again and you’ll understand what I’m on about (hopefully). 

ANYWAY let’s just get to the actual scenes. 

#1: Okay damn let’s talk about this. This is the scene Tae Joo’s father hits Kang Gook and threatens Tae Joo that he’s gonna send him to England if he doesn’t behave. Look at the sadness in his eyes. After he gets hit Kang Gook turns at Tae Joo and gives him a strained smile. Tae Joo desperatly needs someone to comfort him, to tell him that his father isn’t going to send him away, that he won’t be separated with Kang Gook who has always been the person closest to him. I believe he feels sad Kang Gook is being punished at that moment because of him, but most importantly he just doesn’t want to go. Kang Gook has always been a constant in his life (except that one week in Japan maybe). I can see why Kang Gook said that Tae Joo sees him as him mother. He always was the one to comfort Tae Joo and put him back together and Tae Joo seems to always depend on Kang Gook for emotional support. 

#2: Tae Joo’s face before and after Kang Gook says “If you are that good, maybe you don’t need a bodyguard anymore”. Again his whole face changes completely and he looks so shaken. The truth is he probably can’t imagine his life without Kang Gook, the thought alone terrifies him. Maybe he is even slightly hurt that Kang Gook even said something like this. Like this friendship, relationship, or whatever it is, isn’t as important to him as it is to Tae Joo. I-

#3: Tae Joo asking if Kang Gook saw him and Mingyeong kiss the previous night. I believe Tae Joo probably knows Kang Gook did see them. And the fact that he brings it up like that makes Kang Gook so angry. He’s probably wondering why did he have to bring it up. And why is Tae Joo even asking when he knows his job is to always look after him and of course he saw it because he is his bodyguard and he must watch him 24/7. It hurts Kang Gook that he saw that kiss and that he didn’t have a choice. But he is also very angry because Tae Joo is oblivious to all of this and his feelings. 

#4: I don’t have much to say about this. Look at the softness in Tae Joo’s eyes and how, although this is a kind of awkward situation, he isn’t averting his gaze. For fuck’s sake, where’s his oscar??

#5: Now Tae Joo is experiencing all these confusing new feelings and he can’t stop thinking about Kang Gook. The famous shadow speech. You can see both confusion and maybe anger in his eyes. I am not sure if he is actually staring at Kang Gook or if he is seeing a shadow. That scene is just a really good example of a very confused boy. And all that hurt is turning into anger. 

#6: I believe at this point Tae Joo has actually started realizing what his feelings mean. He gets into the restaurant and doesn’t look at Kang Gook at all. This is the first time he acknowledges them. Right after Hyemi asks if Kang Gook likes Tae Joo and then if Tae Joo likes Kang Gook. We basically know he hears everything they say so that can’t be random. He wants to hear the answer. So he looks at Kang Gook with the same sad eyes and waits. And then he hears the famous “master/servant relationship” response. 

#7: So many things have already been said about this scene. They both realize the importance of what really happened. And it’s not just the “you were supposed to be protecting me” thing. Kang Gook mechanically went to Hyemi. It wasn’t even a concious choice. His instinct told him to protect her and not Tae Joo. He probably sees this as Kang Gook not caring enough about him, actually not caring at all. He would just let him get hurt. 

#8: Nothing to say about this, I just had to include this. 

#9: This. This parallel. Even when he was on a date with Hyemi, from the moment Tae Joo entered the place, Kang Gook couldn’t stop stealing glances at him. And ofc she noticed. I believe Hyemi is actually very smart and observant. Kang Gook probably really tried to like her and forget about Tae Joo, but his eyes betrayed him. You see, that’s what eyes do. You can’t control it. That’s why I think this is all very interesting. 

FINAL POINT I PROMISE. Look at the following screenshots. 

#10: As I said, while watching it again to take these screenshots for this post, I noticed how much they look at each other. They literally can’t take their eyes away from each other. That’s why the moments that they DON’T stand out so much. Bet you didn’t see that coming, huh? I think it’s mostly Tae Joo trying to avoid Kang Gook every time he’s angry or upset and Kang Gook trying to avoid the topic of their feelings and hide the truth. Them not looking at each other though, feels me with so much sadness. You can feel something is clearly very very wrong. 

In conclusion, 

[golbrocklovely]

only the lonely survive // colby brock - chapter twenty: so filthy, dialed desire, swallowed pride but spit out fire

A/N: first off, super sorry that this is late. i took a really long nap lol in case you are wondering why i didn’t post yesterday and instead i’m posting today, i have moved my writing schedule for wednesdays and thursdays (and then the occassional one off random day when i fill out request). tuesdays just weren’t working for me. anyway, please let me know what you think of this story so far. i’d love to hear what you have to say. i’ll be posting another chapter of Twisted tomorrow and tonight i’m gonna try to fill out some request. okay, see yall later :)

description of the story

taglist:  @ajosieface , @localsleeper , @julyrubyrose , @far-to-many-bands , @absolute-randomness-forever

trigger warning: light smut, cursing, drinking, partying, talks of virginity

word count: 2036

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

DAY 11/14

"What's up you guys, it's Skye here. And for today's video I'm gonna do a get ready with me slash q and a. I asked you guys on twitter to ask me some questions, so I figured I would answer some while I get ready." I shrugged, staring into the camera.

"I'm going to a party tonight with some friends. It's very last minute so this might have to be a very fast get ready with me." I snorted, pulling out my makeup.

I laid everything out and looked down at all of my choices. Glancing behind me, I looked at my outfit I was planning to wear.

"So for tonight, I'm gonna be wearing this black velvet skirt, which has pockets. God bless." I giggled, "And then I'm gonna wear this grey, key-hole cut top, and black thigh boots."

I slowly started to apply my makeup, starting with some foundation. "Let's see what the first question is..."

I scrolled through my replies on twitter, screenshoting a bunch. "Well, as guessed, the number one question is am I dating Colby?"

I sighed, patting my foundation on more. "No, I'm not dating Colby. We're really good friends and we're super close. I know some of you saw that post that was going around about me, Colby, Brennen, and Casey. We literally hang out all the time together. We're all just friends, y'all."

As I moved on to my eyeshadow look, I saw another question. "’How did you and Colby meet?’"

"Casey has been friends with all the Trap House boys for a while, and me and her have been friends for a couple years now. We decided to take a trip out to LA for a bit as a graduation gift to ourselves, and she surprised me by telling me she's friends with all of them. I met Corey first, and then I was introduced to everyone else right afterwards." I admitted, trying not to ruin the eye look.

I scrolled a little bit further down, coming across he who must not be named. I rolled my eyes. "Someone asked 'do you still hate Travis Marcus?'"

I paused, swiping away the fallout from the eyeshadow. "I never hated him. I still don't hate him. I do think he fucked up by making fun of me, and he hasn't apologized to me since he lied about the whole situation. I don't really want an apology. I'm done talking about it, to be honest. I wish him the best, but I'm done with him."

I cleared my throat, applying my blush and highlight quickly. I then looked at my makeup in the mirror next to my camera. "I think... I'm about done with this look. I don't really wear too much makeup to begin with. I'm gonna answer one more question and then I gotta go."

I grabbed my phone, searching through my replies again. A message popped up from Colby with a bing.

Colby: can't wait to see you tonight

I smiled, glancing up at the camera quickly. I finally stopped on another question. "Oh! This is a fun one: 'Will you go on a XPLR trip with Sam and Colby?' Um, no plans yet. However, I'm so down. I love exploring and going to spooky places, so I'm ready whenever they are."

"I think that wraps up everything for this video. Thank you to everyone that asked me questions. Thank you for all the new people that are following me. I appreciate you so much and you mean a lot to me. Hope you all have a good day, and I'll see you next time. Bye!" I waved at the camera for a moment, then reached over and turned it off.

"Are you ready, Skye?!" Casey yelled through my door.

I rolled my eyes, smirking. "Almost! Just gotta change!"

/  /  /  /

"Who's party is this anyways?" I yelled at Casey as we walked past the speakers.

"Uh... no clue. I think it's just some random influencer that invited everyone they could." She replied, linking arms with me as we walked to the backyard of the house.

House... more like mansion...

We shuffled through crowds of people, finally making it to the back. We spotted Colby and Brennen sitting on a lounge chair together next to the pool. They both waved at us as we strutted over.

"Hi baby. Oh... Casey you're here too." Brennen smirked, as he gave me a quick hug.

Casey's face twisted up as she slapped his arm hard. "That's not funny."

Brennen winced, covering his arm. "It was a joke, woman! You know you're my only baby."

He embraced her, placing his mouth against her ear and whispering something to her. Her face relaxed back into a light smile.

Colby pulled me into his lap. Turning my face to his, I wrapped an arm around his shoulder and placed a kiss on his cheek. "Hi Colby."

Colby smiled softly as his arms slid around me, pulling me closer to him. "Hey. I was wondering when you would get here."

"Sorry it took a while. Uber got lost on the way." I whispered.

Colby nodded his head and kissed up my neck. He then buried his face into me, nipping at my skin.

"Colby, stop." I giggled, pulling away from him.

He laughed. "What? Am I not allowed to kiss you?"

I looked into his eyes, noticing how they slowly looked me over. He bit his lip while he stared.

"How drunk are you?" I smirked.

He gasped dramatically. "I've only had one drink. Why? Do I look drunk?"

"Maybe a bit. I only assumed because you're being a little... grabby with me." I responded.

"You just look so sexy, I can't help it." He shrugged smugly.

"'Sexy', huh?" I questioned jokingly.

He brought his mouth to my ear, so only I could hear him. "Good enough to taste."

A shiver ran down my spine. My nails dug into his shoulder for a second. "Colby..."

"What?" He smiled innocently. His eyes bore into mine and I couldn't look away.

"Um... I need a drink. I'm gonna go get one." I stammered, sliding off his lap.

"Okay, babe. Come back soon." He stated.

I nodded my head and slowly walked away. Taking a deep breath, I tried to calm down my heart.

That boy is gonna be the death of me.

I strolled into the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of vodka, pouring a shot and taking it quickly. I needed to take the edge off but didn't really feel like drinking. Cleaning out the solo cup, I filled it with water and gulped it down. My skin felt hot under my clothes, a heat waving down my body. Once I felt sort of calm, I sighed.

Two hands grasped my waist from behind, spinning me around. Lips landed on mine instantly, taking my breath away. I could feel the ring-cladded hands slide down and grip my hips. I smiled into the kiss and pulled Colby's body closer. My hands tightened their hold on his forearms. He bit my lip as he stepped back.

"Sorry... I needed to do that." He mumbled, his voice breathy.

I felt my heart beat speed up. A growing want settled in my mind and body. I needed him. Right now.

Should I do this?

"Fuck it." I grunted.

I clutched Colby's wrist and dragged him to the nearest bathroom. I yanked the door opened, pulling him inside and slamming the door shut.

Colby laughed. "What are you-"

I cut off Colby with my lips, wrapping my arms around him and gripping his hair. He moaned against my mouth and pressed me up against the counter. His hands slid down my thighs as he hoisted me up onto the counter. I immediately wrapped my legs around him, pushing my body into his. His tongue slipped into my mouth, his fingers dancing along my sides. A moan escaped my mouth as he bit my lip teasingly. A hand slithered up my back and into my hair, tugging. My head fell back, and he began to attack my neck with his tongue and teeth, leaving wet marks up and down my throat.

"Fuck, Colby." I gasped.

He smirked against my skin. My hands wandered up the front of his shirt, caressing his torso. His lips left my neck for a moment as he ripped his shirt off, pushing himself back into me. Our lips attached again, my legs wrapped around his hips. My fingertips dug into his shoulders and waist as we started to grind against each other. His hands pushed up my skirt, making sure I was as close as possible.

My breath hitched in my throat as he slid a finger up my thigh and started rubbing my clit.

"You're so wet." He hissed.

I nodded. "All for you."

He bit his lip, his finger slipping away. He groaned as he stopped his movements slowly.

"What are you doing?" I whined, breathing heavy

He sighed. "I'm sorry. I know... I instigated this. But... we can't do this."

"Why?" I asked, my legs falling off his hips.

"I don't want our first time to be in a bathroom at a random party. As much as we both want it right now, I'd rather not do it here." Colby admitted, keeping his head down.

Our first time... my first time...

"Right." I cleared my throat. "...Okay."

"You're not mad?" He questioned, glancing up at me.

I smirked. "Frustrated... sexually. But not mad."

He chuckled. "Good. I would hate for you to be mad at me."

I leaned forward, kissing him sweetly. "How could I ever?"

/  /  /  /

After our almost first time in the bathroom, we calmed down and went back to the party. We spent the rest of the time chilling with Casey and Brennen. We all called it a night early, deciding the party wasn't as interesting as it had seemed to be.

Casey and I got home, changed, and ordered pizza. We sat in the kitchen, eating immediately.

"That party was such a bust." I remarked, biting into my slice.

She agreed. "I'm surprised it was that boring. Most LA parties I've been to are so much fun."

I paused for a moment, needing to open up. "Me and Colby almost had sex tonight."

Casey choked on her pizza slightly. "What? Where is this coming from? Subtlety just isn't your strong suit, huh?"

"What? I need to talk about it!" I exclaimed, giggling.

"Well, why didn't you have sex?" She inquired.

"He stopped us before we could."

"Again?"

"...Yeah. He said he didn't want our first time to be in a bathroom at a party. Which I understand." I replied.

Casey raised an eyebrow at me, putting her pizza down. "Our first... you haven't told him you're a virgin?"

I shook my head. "No."

"Why?" She asked.

"Because.... I just can't." I sighed, continuing. "What if he finds out and backs out of it? Or thinks I'm weird for being one at twenty-three?"

"Out of all the boys in the universe to be that douchey, Colby would not even fall in the same category. You know he's not gonna judge you." Casey stated.

"I don't think he is like that, but in a worse case scenario, he could be. I can't take that chance. I care about him too much for this minor detail to fuck up everything." I grumbled.

"Why would you want to be with someone that would do that to you though?" Casey responded.

"I know Colby isn't gonna be like that, regardless of if I tell him or not. But I can't. I'm embarrassed enough about it as it is. Besides, it's not that big of a deal." I insisted.

"He might want to know." She mumbled.

"Well, if he asks... I'll tell him. But otherwise, he won't know." I said.

"Are you ever gonna tell him?" She questioned, leaning on the counter.

I shrugged. "Maybe one day."

"You do realize we're gonna be leaving soon? If you plan to have sex with him, you might want to do it ASAP." She chuckled, walking out of the kitchen.

Fuck... she's right.

<< CHAPTER 19 || CHAPTER 21 >>

[papersynth]

The Feud breakdown theory

TLDR: Its basically one big Klance-centric episode, this whole theory’s probably a reach but its nice lol. Reposted from my twitter. More under the cut!

Lets start off this thread by pointing out one of the glaring things that immediately hit me once I started watching this episode when it aired: the title sequence. I'm not particularly old but my parents have always loved gameshows and reality television.

They would watch it in the living room and so one of the things that stuck out to me the most was how the logo for Garfle Warfle Snick is visually similar to "The Dating Game" which was a 60's TV show centered around a bachelorette picking out a guy to take out on a date.

Even the dang flowers.....

It was at this moment I thought "well, after being basically deprived of any Klance scenes for 3 seasons, you'd think S7 would bring you some of that and boy oh boy I've been fed so well. I think its strange for them to visually replicate a DATING GAMESHOW logo. We know for a fact that they were going for a family feud esque style, so why didn't they just replicate the Family feud logo instead? The vibe of the entire episode would change because it'll be a glaring reference.

Going back to Kaplan's tweet about how things aren't what they seem, the Feud really, like, obviously lets you know, that things really aren't what they seem. The story shifts in focus and tone and so do the characters.

My theory is that this episode foreshadows events to come that even the paladins never knew were even challenges themselves.

I believe this sort of aids the Klance fight theory (graciously written by Ca HERE) because that altean colony which they believe was a win for them to discover, could possibly be their next challenge (their garfle, becomes a warfle)

We also know that it isn't new for Voltron to use the "it was an altean all along!" as shock value for their enemies but at this point, I think Allura's starting to learn that her race is equally capable of evil.

This adds to the idea that during the 3 year gap, there's a possibility that the altean colony and Haggar/Galra have been working together to develop new technology (Hunk: I've never seen the Galra use weapons like these before) because clearly it isn’t the olkari helping them.

Time for my biggest reach yet, how the fuck is that a chopstick lance. You can recognise a mullet for a hundred feet away but you can't recognise a sword at point blank. Strange considering Keith drew out the sword pretty quickly, so there's no way Lance saw chopsticks.

NOTHING in this image screams chopsticks. I even went and printed out this god forsaken screencap and tilted it to see if it looked like chopsticks from a far angle and nope, still looks like a blade. This one's a reach but, chopsticks are insinuate a "yin-yang" dynamic.

Chopsticks is a strange pick because it doesn't LOOK anything like a chopstick. It would have made more sense to call it a shovel, paper fan, knife, surfboard etc. Go off. Chopsticks have always been used as a pair, one cannot exist without the other, which brings me to voltron's wings. I like the idea of Voltron being similar to Darling in the Franxx because of their mecha designs kinda taking reference from Evangelion. This is a reach definitely, but its cute whatever, eat this up. There's a mythical bird called "Jian" and it only has one wing.

The bird can only exist with another of its kind, where together, they can fly and soar. Wings and duality are symbols that have ALWAYS gone hand in hand, simply because there are two. Chopsticks being Lance's stupid fucking word choice is so damn specific its hurting me.

HERE'S ANOTHER REACH Y'ALL, the reason why chopsticks are thicker and circular at the top but thinner and squared at the bottom is because they represent the heaven and the earth. WHERE'D THEY COME FROM Y'ALL. WHERE DID THE PALADINS GO? UH? BACK TO EARTH YEA?

And once again, Keith draws this one very quickly so it does show that Lance can make a good guess immediately. I can see why he would say Dog here. SO WHY COULDN'T YOU SEE A BLADE AT FIRST LANCE? EXPLAIN YOURSELF. MOVING ON FROM THE DAMN DRAWING GAME.

I think these two screenshots speak for themselves. Earlier this morning I wrote a theory about how the Klance dynamic is all over the place because Lance has grown as a person in his absence and he's confused as to how he's supposed to behave towards "new keith".

He takes a jab at Keith throughout the start of this whole episode

"Not my fault keith can't draw!"

"I'm not a mind reader!"

So once again, its the usual bickering coming from Lance, but we see that shift later in the episode, I'll get to that later.

The next game with bii boh bi. Funny to me how the game's called "The Garflator" when we've already established that "Garfle" means to "win". The monster isn't the Garflator as they've misleaded, its the tank.

If you don't believe me, here's the subtitles literally calling the monster the "Warflator". Strange isn't it? You miss these things when you watch it the first time. Bob wasn't joking when Warfle and Garfle were interchangeable.

I don't really want to analyse how Bii Boh Bi acts throughout the whole segment mainly because I think that's reaching a little too far, and it was likely comedic the entire time, but I can't help but notice that his tone throughout suggests a "fill in the blanks" situation.

My theory is that this situation foreshadows the possibility that someone will help Lance fill in the blanks, and guess what the answer is in the GARFLator. He might even really be running out of time so again, stick it out till the last episode of S8.

Bonus: Seems like its pretty nice isn't it. Our crops are watered and his skin is cleared. Joking of course, but overall the whole Garflator/Warflator situation keeps getting mixed up together that's why I think this theory's reaching but I digress.

Time for the scene that made all of us Klancers scream into the depths of hell. We all already know that they didn't have to vote for each other if it was meaningless, but after seeing the recent surplus of Lance being hurt by Keith leaving, I've got a solid theory.

Lets look at the scene first, mainly at Hunk and Pidge's faces. We know Hunk is emotionally observant while Pidge behaves logically, so I think when we're speaking logically: Lance picking Keith seems HIGHLY illogical to pidge.

Lance "hates" Keith. Why pick him to survive? THE MATH DOESN'T ADD UP. On the other hand, Hunk's facial expression here seems more....worried? Not confused. There's been substantial evidence that Lance was hurt by Keith leaving, and if he spoke to anyone about it, it'd be hunk.

I think Pidge is surprised to hear these things come out of Lance's mouth and seeing Keith pick him. Remember when they all picked someone to help Lance? The braniest of the team? I think honestly Pidge might be the first to pick up on their possible affections towards each other.

This sort of parallels the earlier scene where Lance was the last one to figure out Pidge was a girl, but maybe that's reaching a little too hard (Curse these short arms!)

Earlier this morning I wrote a thread about how Lance picking Keith to leave here is probably the nail in the coffin that he deeply cares about Keith. Remember, this situation would probably be the third time that Keith has left Lance.

Read the linked thread, I won't reiterate it here but basically Lance grows in Keith's absence, stepping up when he needs to, but its not really what he wants. Losing Keith again might be devastating, but that only heightens why this scene is so affectionate. He makes this choice himself.

He calls Keith the future because he has faith in his skills (he's our leader) and him as a person (plus he's half galra). That Keith HAS a future. This is SIGNIFICANT because the only other person that has said that they have faith in Keith, was Shiro.

Shiro is VALUABLE to Keith, he's the most important person in his life. Having people believe in him has always been difficult and I think where Lance says (although cryptically) that he believes in Keith, is really where their new dynamic takes off.

THAT's why Keith behaves somewhat coldly in S7, because its never gonna be easy for him to suddenly accept a new person in his life. He’s not sure how he should react to another person caring for him. Both of them know their dynamic isn't what it used to be, they can't joke and jab anymore. We're back to square one, but its different this time.

One last thing about this episode (that isn't Klance related) is Luxia's kingdom, just a fun quick thought that maybe the Baku might be back, i mean he never really was defeated, just trapped. ;)

Uhhh that's it! Can't think of anything else haha. Thanks for the wild ride friends, I hope these feed your optimism for today~ Again, they're all just theories but I hope S8 is a good experience for everyone! Have a great day :)

One last thing: I would love it if Klance happens and the theories prove true, and if it doesn't its okay! Sure I'll be disappointed, but its fine if I'm wrong about a fictional TV show lol.

[lokiarsene]

like yesterday, here's a bullet list of my thoughts for episodes 18~21

thoughts on episode 18:

oh no, it's the beach episode.

-- i really like how they show the way the PT take care of futaba. ren patiently cleaning up her room in between hours at the florist, them playing vidya with her, or just having lunch together in montage moments is very sweet. it makes me wish the anime had much slower pacing, more slice of life-y kind of drama.

-- watching yusuke, ryuji, and futaba lose their freakin minds over good curry is VERY relatable.

-- i still don't understand why ann and makoto thought that a two piece frilly bathing suit was the way to go with futaba. a one piece that she could wear under a long wrap or a hoodie would've made so much more sense... but >male gaze

-- have i told y'all how fucking tired i am of the sexualization of the teenage girls in p5 yet, and how it is one of the several things that fuckin ruined this game for me

have i?

well here it is again

none of the previous games were as bad as this b t w and p4 had one of the dungeons be a STRIP CLUB.

-- yusuke and his lobsters are wonderful.

-- oh god i forgot COMPLETELY about the whole 'mental shutdowns' thing in this game's plot. i think because it's all so pointlessly convoluted. p3 had something similar but even there it was just people turned catatonic for weeks on end when the monthly boss-shadows drew near.

i think the reason i find this so hard to understand is because from p3 to p4 the rules of shadows didn't really change so much. p3 had the persona users go up against shadow bosses; p4 had people confront the shadows within themselves, either accepting them completely (which then turned into persona), or the shadow 'absorbed' the person and ran rampant as a monster. neither of those rules really contradict each other, but in p5 personal shadows for persona users are gone completely, and how you deal with other people's personal shadows doesn't even involve them being present to complete the merge.

mona says that persona users can't have palaces, but persona users in 4 could and DID have 'dungeons' within the shadows' worlds. these dungeons dealt specifically with what was at the core of the shadows' emergence--a deep secret and a hidden truth that caused the shadow to grow, a place that was a replica and a distortion of reality based upon that suppressed truth. so that sure sounds like a fucking palace to me.

so....................... unless there's like, multiple realities folded into our own, and persona users can only access certain ones.................. i'm just super confused.

like, i know it's because the rules change game to game, but p3 to p4 didn't have any contradictions, and p2 didn't contradict anything in p3, either. it just went from a full party of wild card users to a singular one.

-- i'm glad ann's getting a little screentime here. i was just thinking about how other characters' development was lacking after makoto and futaba got so much focus.

-- mona's so sweet to ann ;-; now that he has a human form in p5r, i hope they become really good friends. she needs a kind guy friend that'll be reliable~ plus he makes her laugh.

-- sojiro talking about the anniversary of wakaba's death is......... really interesting........ considering that screenshot of futaba sitting next to a woman with the exact same haircut as her "deceased" mother.

-- ren reassuring mona that he absolutely has to be human, that he will return to who he used to be once they figure out what's happening in the metaverse is jsut jdfklasd

AND HIS LIL ROUND OF APPLAUSE WHEN MONA TALKS ABOUT ALL THE THINGS HE'S GOING TO DO TO KEEP THE WORLD SAFE ;-;

AND THAT SHOT OF HIM SLEEPING CURLED UP ON REN'S STOMACH

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

-- listen i know mona isn't rly a cat but he's the BEST cat

thoughts on episode 19:

oh it's the hawaii episode.

-- man what the hell kinda budget do these school's got that they can just go overseas with dozens of students on a yearly basis? that's impressive.

-- ryuji: "whoa, awesome! ..... i don't really get it, but awesome!" fjdsafds okay that got a laugh outta me. good one, ryuji.

-- ren: "i'm excited, too." (said in a monotone) fjklsadsl BLESS THIS BOY

-- ren's FACE when he learns that futaba installed a spying app on his phone and can hear him/see pictures he takes is...... kind of hilarious. especially if you have the headcanon that he and akechi send dumbass snapchats to each other a lot--which i do. and which you do now, too.

-- mona's depression is ten times more sad because he's a cat okay :c why they gotta make the cat so cute

-- ren, ryuji, and ann's lil sleepover is adorable. especially since ann chastises ryuji for not knowing one of the basic rules of a sleepover: if you start talkin' about your crushes, you gotta start with your own~ thems the rules lads

-- rip principal bloatneck.

-- honestly that truck shoulda at least TRIED to stop.

-- "A LO HA." goddammit that's adorable

AND HE GIVES THE LEI NECKLACE TO MONA FJDSKFJDSKL ren you're so SWEET.

-- I TOTALLY FORGOT THAT MONA CALLS SAE "ONEE-NO-NIIJIMA" FJADSKLFJDSKL ahhhh it's so cute.

-- the PT targeting okumura, who is essentially the dave thomas with political ambitions of the persona 5 world, is far funnier now that i phrase it like that.

-- ANN, OF ALL FUCKING PEOPLE, SAYING THAT THEY PROBABLY BROUGHT THIS RECENT TROUBLE ON THEMSELVES, IS A FUCKING STUPID WRITING DECISION. I CAN'T BELIEVE SOMEONE DIDN'T LOOK AT THAT AND GO, "ANN WOULDN'T SAY THIS. ANN HAS NO REASON TO SAY IT." god. lmao PLEASe let p5r be a goddamn second draft.

-- mona's totally right that ryuji's just concerned with getting popular and his dick wet. like,,, that's why this argument only made me hate ryuji more than i already did. he gets pissy when mona points out the truth.

god he sucks lmao

I'M SORRY I'M SO SALTY YOU GUYS

LOOK I'LL SAY SOMETHING NICE: SAE AND AKECHI ARE COOL

-- i really like how guarded akechi's face looks in his conversation with sae, and how off his guard he looks when she tells him that she's not going to hold back, especially since the culprit is doing such dire, awful things. he's not exactly surprised, but he's definitely uneasy and shaken by what he hears. which makes me wonder who he’s really concerned for--himself, or for ren (and the PT by extension, but akechi only really seems to care about ren, so).

the reason i like that is because the okumura arc in p5 is really where akechi's mind starts its downward spiral. principal kobayakawa's death obviously rattled him, especially since the only reason the principal died was because shido saw him as useless and disposable, something akechi is desperate NEVER TO BE. and it's that + what happens with okumura that really kicks him over the edge.

i hope p5r will give us the chance to pull him back from it. he deserves a better chance than the game's subpar writing gave to him.

thoughts on episode 20:

-- ren wakes up in a panic because he thinks he sees mona on his bed ;___________;

-- goro snoopin' on the PT's LOUD, TOTALLY CONSPICUOUS conversation in front of okumura foods' HQ is kind of adorable if you remember he clearly loves star wars (HE HAS A LIGHT SABER), and the camera cuts to his face right as they're talking about big bang and outer space lingo.

-- oh, haru. i really wish you were the black mask. that would've been so much cooler--and an actual twist. her total hopeless panic about being a beauty thief could still be a thing (because it is actually endearing), it'd just be an act. but that's me talkin' fix-its again.

-- i really like the scene of haru defending mona to the PT on the rooftop, then cutting to show just how strained her relationship is with her father. she exists to be useful to her father's ambitions and nothing else, and that scene really drove home just how painful that is for her.

-- REN TWIRLS HIS HAIR BETWEEN TWO FINGERS WHEN HE'S DEEP IN THOUGHT. AHHHHHHH I FORGOT HE DID THAT

-- oh hey remember how the game went through the trouble of showing how haru's fiance is a sexist, violent, animal-hurting piece of shit and then promptly failed to actually separate her from him in game (i think you only can do that in her s-link?? the s-link you can barely finish in your first run of the game??), and in t hEN SHOWED HER IN THE CAR WITH HIM LATER, LOOKING HORRIBLY UNCOMFORTABLE?

god this story makes me so fucking mad lmfao STOP PUTTING GIRLS IN PHYSICALLY OR SEXUALLY VIOLENT PERIL AND NEVER ACTUALLY ENSURING THAT THEY'RE SAFE, YOU DAVID CAGE LEVEL OF HACK BULLSHIT WRITERS.

-- ryuji running into the attic, all worried about mona, with a first aid kit, is..... very good. very good and endearing. good on you, ryuji.

-- haru gently encouraging mona to tell the truth is also really good. idk if i just missed it in the game or what, but i really like how she's presented in the anime. she's like a counterpart to ren--soft, sincere, observant, patient, yet she's made of pure steel beneath all that.

thoughts on episode 21:

-- WHY WAS HARU'S GRANDFATHER GIVING COFFEE TO A FIVE YEAR OLD

-- haru, the reason your father's heart grew twisted is thanks to capitalism. you gotta change the heart of capitalism.

-- not to be all poochie here but whenever akechi isn't on screen, all i can ask myself is whERE'S AKECHI?

-- HOW CAN I TAKE THE EVIL DAVE THOMAS SERIOUSLY WHEN HE'S DRESSED LIKE FUCKIN MEGAMIND?

-- okay see this is where i'm thrown completely out of the story or even really liking haru. haru just listened to her dad's shadow saying he would PIMP HER OUT TO HER FIANCE WITHOUT A SECOND THOUGHT. and she still is just like ~no i want him to go back to being kind~

bitch are you nuts

are you NUTS

youR DAd SHOULD DIE AND YOU'D BE BETTER OFF

CONSIDERING HOW THE GAME GOES, YOU ARe BETTER OFF

god. i'm getting so mad again lmao

-- ren approaching haru to point out that if the truth of her father's crimes comes to light, she'll forever be associated with him (and with all the harm and ruined reputation that brings) is, once again, further reminder of just how... damn good ren is. he doesn't hesitate to speak from the heart nor does he ever fail to listen to someone else speak from theirs.

-- also not for nothing but uh

how did the cops not like

figure out how the PT phan-site was set up within the first few months and track it down to mishima? was that ever addressed at all?

-- honestly another reason why i get so fucking mad about this okumura stuff is the game goes SO FAR OUT OF ITS WAY to make you feel BAD that he died, when he was by all rights a fucking shitheel monster, yet when akechi dies it's like 'oh well. that sucked.' fuck off, atlus. the death of a greedy, heartless CEO isn't more sad just because his gaslit daughter is conditioned to be sad about it.

i understand that a large part of the shock after okumura's death is because the PT don't know if they did anything wrong. but okumura was in no way a good person. he was in no way a person whose redemption overruled all the hurt and harm he did. that has been the case for EVERY PT target before this, so why the fuck is okumura suddenly so different? why SHOULD he be?

the difference between him and, say, akechi is that okumura et. al. all made those choices on their own to do terrible things. they delighted in it, they enjoyed it. but akechi, much like futaba, was forced into a cycle of self-destruction--it’s just that in futaba’s case, her self-destruction targeted herself, and akechi’s was quite literally weaponized and used against others. he approached shido as a young teenager and was then used by him for years.

a teenage boy being used as a magical hitman by his shitlord father is far more deserving of sympathy and redemption than grown adults who willingly make the decision to harm, abuse, and prey on others. but no, the game didn’t want to do that.

this is another big problem i have with p5's second and third acts: it's so tonally dissonant and sloppy. it's like they didn't try to actually be as rebellious and hellraiser-y as the first act WANTED to be, and it all ends up being such a limp-dick shriveled mess of "let's fight against this rotten society!! ......... as long as it in no way actually upsets anyone or does any REAL change." fuck off lmao

that's not me even commenting on the "twist" and how it needed to be explained MULTIPLE TIMES to the player for it to make any sense.

and it still doesn't make sense to me btw.

so that's another thing i hope p5r fixes.

-- rip evil dave thomas megamind.

-- akechi floating the idea to sae that the phantom thieves had nothing to do with okmura’s death is............................ interesting.

[lizzybeth1986]

Quick Thoughts on TRR Book 3 Chapter 19

• It's our WEDDING DAY. But it looks like Anton wants to make it our Deathday first.

• For the kind of wait most of the stans have been keeping since this book has begun, seeing our MCs finally married to our favourite LIs is quite...satisfying. Well. For most of us at least.

• Title: You Are Cordially Invited. To see me get married or to see me die?

• Mara goes outside, vowing that to get through to us they'd have to get through to her first.

• Madeleine and Bertrand barricade the door with a couch and Bertrand warns everyone to have something in hand (Olivia is one step ahead, obviously, with her sharp-as-fuck stilettos).

• That girl is ready and prepared to commit maritricide, y'all! XD

• Hana picks a vase, Madeleine keeps her clipboard, Penelope is panicking at the back with Merlin and Morgana (this was the shit I was trying to avoid with court, Mom! I can almost hear her thinking), but if you really want to see a legend minus the legend points...I should point you all to Kiara:

I repeat. A legend I stan.

This is someone having a trigger attack, and steeling herself despite the trauma of two previous experiences before plunging herself into a possible third one. That takes serious guts.

• Madeleine isn't exactly prepared to fight (clearly being Queen never seemed to involve fighting assassins before for her, strangely enough), but Olivia sure is. She says "do you want to keep bleating like a defenseless lamb or do you want to get ready to fight?"

• Honestly though Olivia delivers some of my favourite lines this chapter.

• Ana is staying out if this - (in public) because she "does not have the equipment for this" and (in private) because she wants to capture the scoop of the century!

• THANK YOU MAXWELL for gifting me that sword!

•

(All the screenshots, except for the Maxwell one from the HIMEME channel, are mine)

I have better bodyguards inside this boutique than I do outside. Look at all of these people. Picking up clipboards, stilletoes, vases, mannequins, scissors, THEIR OWN BARE HANDS, and defeating these dudes. Like...like...they may have been incredibly sheltered and protected by their families but all of them know how to make the best of a situation where their lives are under threat. And mind you, at least two of those women openly struggle with issues related to their mental health and still manage to emerge from this doing what they can.

• I loved the sword scene! It was a nice look back at TCaTF (esp Book 3) and a nice way to celebrate the Choices anniversary. In TCaTF books 1 and 2, you had different point systems for Kenna and Dom: prestige for her and power for him, to show the rise of Kenna as a formidable leader and the gaining of Dom's fire powers. Because he possesses enough power to transform into a dragon by the end of Book 2, the focus then shifts to them gearing up for their biggest battle yet - the one with Empress Azura of Ducitora (though part of this book is spent with Dom trapped inside an airship fighting a particularly frightening form of mind control from Hex). The implication is that Kenna becoming a legend consolidates her position as the uniter of the Five Kingdoms, which is what she becomes by the end of the story. It's therefore fitting that the legend points feature here, just before the MC's wedding - for like Kenna, she has just returned from reuniting the nobility (or not) into supporting Liam's right to the throne through her wedding, and like Kenna she needs to fight a Nevrakis, while possibly having the support of other Nevrakises...well, just one in the case of TRR.

• If you're marrying Hana, she features nowhere in this scene, and Olivia stabs the assassin who attacks Madeleine with knives. If you're not, she is part of your entourage, and particularly is shown taking action when Madeleine's life is under threat. If they hadn't already been hinting at Madeleine's "feelings" for Hana, and the latter's convenient amnesia regarding the events of the engagement tour...I wouldn't have minded. But I do. Very much.

• Maxwell only features in this scene if you choose him as a bridesmaid, but I would highly recommend choosing him as one at least once (if he's not your LI that is) because he and Bertrand do so amazing fighting together here.

• Ana's motto will be "my life may leave me but never my desire to catch proof of a burning-hot scoop".

• Gee, Bastien, you took a while to get here. Like...8 chapters or something.

• Mara comes back with an injury and an attempt to say our code name, which...sure thanks Mara but you still suck at your job. If guarding us is really your job at all.

• Bastien and whoever is with him have managed to capture the remaining assassins but Anton managed to escape. If that doesn't come back to bite us in the ass later...

• Why is Madeleine so involved when it comes to MY dress? Her hand is literally trembling. Please don't tell me this design was intended for her wedding. That'll be a waste of 25 whole diamonds.

• Or perhaps she's just shook coz THERE IS FYDELIA LACE INVOLVED YOU PEASANTS.

• "I need to have security remove any guests wearing white," says the press sec who tried to sneak in a white dress to wear for my wedding.

(Yes. I plead guilty. I just needed an excuse to cram in a Brian May gif there. I can't help that this man is the Meme King of Queen).

• OF COURSE I'M WEARING DRAKE'S POCKET WATCH AND HANA'S SHOES.

• We've finally reached the cathedral! After threatening to either drive the carriage through the premises, cry or sue Cordonia if we don't get there soon enough.

• I see the Applewood people! You get loads of options to greet the crowd. And of course I was going to try getting Esther to say " 'sup" once lol. I think depending on how you wave to them, the press will either see you as graceful or playful.

•

(Screenshots: Hana's is mine, Maxwell's from the HIMEME YouTube channel, Penelope's from @sgt-peppers-coffee-club , Olivia's from @i-dream-so-i-write , and Kiara's from @callmetippytumbles )

Here's all our Maids (plus one Man) of Honour! All of them speak about this day being a long time coming, but also reflect with the MC on what it took for them all to get to this point. I think Olivia (by virtue of being the Fighter of the lot) and Kiara (because of what she's faced at least thrice now) get some particularly meaty lines for their MOH scene.

• You get to choose whether Bertrand should accompany you down the aisle, since it's tradition to be done so by a member of your House, and the Beaumonts have been her sponsor from the beginning. Cue an emotional moment with Bertrand, who regards you as family now and is immensely proud of you. The Maxwell stans got a similar conversation in the vows diamond scene, but in more detail because it's his kid brother you're marrying, but now we get it as an honorary Beaumont as well. He gets super super emotional if you ask him to walk you down the aisle.

• Oooh pretty! And so many stained glass windows! Why was Leo complaining so much about this cathedral in RoE Book 3? I would have given an arm and a leg to get married there.

• NEW MUSIC!!! Lots of lovely flowery piano notes and trumpets. Very regal and very much a wedding march tune.

• So technically I'm guessing this is where we get to see the results of our tour, because in my playthrough everyone is here.

• If you're marrying Drake, you get to see his mother Bianca, and she speaks to you after the ceremony. I can kiiinda see where Savannah gets her "I only met you ten seconds ago but OMG WE'RE GOING TO BE BFFS" vibe comes from.

• WTF none of these people changed clothes it seems 😂 Everyone's else is wearing what they usually wear. Guys, this wedding is going to be freaking TELEVISED and these nobles are wearing their usual dusty outfits 😂😂

• The Best Men/Women, are depicted positively - whether they have feelings for the MC or not. Drake is said to be showing a "rare, unabashed grin", and Liam is "smiling proudly". Kiara is "smiling excitedly".

• So as you all know, you can choose between Liam (if you're marrying Hana or Maxwell), Leo or Regina for officiating your wedding. The speech is largely the same - they all mention the seed and apple tree analogy, the traditions of Cordonia and how important love is - but the opening lines vary.

(Regina's is from mine, Leo's is from the Bizzy's Choices channel, and Liam's is from @kennaxval )

Regina's is distant and formal, which suits her and suits the scale of the occasion. Leo's is humorous, and Liam's is flowery and poetic. This suits both of the men as we know them. Leo is known to not take himself very seriously, and Liam's language is very ornate by default.

• The vows (I'm talking about the LIs' ones here, since the MC's is customizable) are all beautiful. Every single one delves into their history with her and how their relationship with her grew from strength to strength. You can see why they decided to go off-script for their vows. Their story with her has always been personal and these vows are about acknowledging the long, hard journey that got them to this altar.

•

Liam's is about how the MC taught him to believe in possibility, to believe that he needn't be stuck in the rut of royal stoicism to be the king his people need. Hana's is about the freedom the MC gave her from a future carefully charted out for her, into a better, brighter one. Maxwell's is about how he has found a woman whose very presence represents adventure for him, someone who will raise him up rather than tie him down. Drake's is about embracing change, accepting the love the MC has for him and the love he tried to deny having for the MC. I love them all.

• In my mind this is the improved version of the wedding scene in TCaTF, as is the RoE wedding. I recall, way back when Kenna got married, fans (rightly) pointed out that while her LIs' vows sounded heartfelt and acknowledged their relationship with her, the few options given for Kenna's vows made her sound impersonal and not very involved in comparison (for instance, even though Diavolos appeared only by Book 3, Kenna still was made to sound like the relationship had been there for longer). In RoE, they attempted to correct that, by giving us the diamond option to personalize our vows (still using their choices, but we got more options here and went into more detail). In TRR they've gone a step further and have US type what we want with our wishes, because even when you have the same LI - no two people can view one character the same. There's space for shitposting haha, but it's also to ensure that we have enough say in the vows we want our MCs to repeat.

• If you don't choose either your corgi or Bartie, the Cordonian children become your ringbearers. In this case, they are Valerie and Marco, the little ones from Lythikos, which I think is a very interesting choice. Because it does show us that though the Nevrakis clan seem to want to destroy Liam and his line, Lythikos itself - represented by Olivia - is in support of him. If Liam doesn't marry you, it makes even more sense that the children meant to represent Cordonia come from Olivia's estate.

• Lol everyone got the same ring. At least it isn't the cheapass one Madeleine had us pick up for her in Book 2.

• Vows exchanged, tears shed, and we can be as thirsty as we want in public without anyone saying a thing (wink at the LI, tell them you wish you both were alone instead of at a cathedral, give them a steamy kiss after your vows are exchanged).

AAAAAAAND WE'RE MARRIED!!!!

(Screenshots: for Drake and Maxwell it's was @sgt-peppers-coffee-club and for Hana it was @kennaxval 😄)

Ngl I was super super emotional when I saw the wedding portrait it took us so LONG and it was so BEAUTIFUL 😭

• Esther wants to call the monarchy the "DuPont dynasty" right now haha. I think there are some playthroughs (for instance Maxwell's I think) where Hana speaks of creating the Lee dynasty which...well...is odd if you're not marrying her, yes. This chapter had a whole bunch of goof ups going on.

•

YES DONNIE KEEP SAYING IT. I'M QUEEN NOW. FINALLY.

• From rats in a dumpster to this...what a journey.

• We now have a reception to go to! There is a teaser about whether this reception will be the one we hoped for (which is shorthand either for "gear up for drama folks" or for "you didn't spend enough diamonds for this, sucks to be you" 😒).

General Thoughts:

• How many of you folks have seen Cold November Rain? That music video from Guns n Roses? In that one, there's a wedding and Slash, the band guitarist (cum best man who seems to be in love with the bride) drops the ring in the bridegroom's hands and then steps out into a...desert for this:

Would have been epic if either Drake or Liam left the ceremony midway to perform an epic guitar solo to the bustling crowd in Cordonia 😂 (you know the writers have friendzoned Hana and Maxwell hard enough that that will never happen for them).

• For the most part this chapter definitely did live up to the hype. This wedding was the culmination of everything we've been through since the book began so of course it was going to be big - and it was. I may have lost a lot of love I used to have for this book, but damn did I feel emotional when I read those vows, saw that wedding screenshot, heard the wedding music, fought alongside my girls.

• I think there may be two chapters left. Next chapter will be dedicated to the reception, and we'll see the following choices we made play out, most of which are certainly diamond-options:

1. The nobles (free, but it largely depends on whether you won them over or not)

2. The main course (from the food festival in Castelserraillian). Liam also showed us a chocolate souffle from there which he was suggesting for the wedding but IDK if that one will feature.

3. The wedding cake (Capitol cake scene) and the surprise dessert for the LI (baklava, cheetah cake, s'mores, hot chocolate).

4. The chocolates/macarons for guests

5. The gifts for the LIs (all of which open up a special scene).

6. The presence of Drake's mother (if you are marrying Drake).

That's a whole lot of stuff to code so get ready for a few goof-ups here and there, fam. As long as it's not as bad as the one they did at Hana's wedding that would be fairly okay.

• Now I know the "husband and wife" thing was a goof-up with the code, as is Liam not wearing the white uniform if you chose it for him and Hana's comment on the Lee dynasty with the MC (which somehow never showed up on my Liam playthrough). And technically, not many would actually be this angry about it if it weren't for the fact that Hana has been treated like crap by her writers before this, and on a smaller scale so has Maxwell. It's bad enough that she is the only option out there. It's even worse that while Drake gets extra development and extra scenes and extra characters (they worked hard enough to do the artwork for his mother for just that one playthrough), Hana is stuck with lazy writing and the person shown having a crush on her was her bully in the previous book. Having Liam announce that Hana and the MC are "husband and wife" even after different options had been given or chosen, would feel like a slap in the face.

Thankfully, PB has recognized how badly this could alienate fans, especially fans of characters like Hana and Maxwell who don't get the attention they deserve, and not only apologized but recognized how hurtful it was and tried to compensate.

I mean, how would you feel if the LI you liked was constantly being treated like they didn't matter? Wouldn't it frustrate you? Wouldn't a "glitch" like this one be the rotten cherry on a huge crapcake?

I'm saying this because I have seen at least a few say "this is a glitch lmao why are you guys complaining so much". This is why. It goes beyond just the glitch. It goes into why "husband" has to be the default here. It goes into chapters and chapters of shitty writing given only for certain LIs. That frustration is bound to boil over at some point.

• We'll also definitely be sneaking out and doing some post-matrimonial banging at some point. And if I don't get lingerie before that happens Ima be very very angry 😡

• I think it would be better to spread this out into two chapters.

• Is there a chance Anton might actually try something at the reception? Possibly.

• Will it be enough to warrant another full-length book? I don't know. I hope not.

• Alright, it's time for Chapter 20 now!

[almondmilkcleanser]

DO IT FOR THE BAG - CHAPTER 77

It wasn't no more than 1.5 seconds that I came into the house after my daddy pulled out of the driveway that Jamie was out of her room and standing in the doorway with her arms crossed in concern. It wasn't the concern of me being hurt, but that kind of concern that leaves someone on their toes till that sense of relief is received.

"Well?" she looked me over one time before taking one cautious step forward as I came in the house.

"Well-" I added a little bit more suspense before sucked her teeth.

C'mon bitch, stop playing! Y'all okay or what?" she propped her hand on her hip this time, her lip turned up in a pout.

Without saying too much, I intentionally pushed some hair from around my neck to not only flash the pink diamond Mila-Crown prong illusion tennis bracelet my daddy gave me, but the matching necklace at that.

Jamie's eyes got big and the gasp that escaped her lips was nothing but audible.

"Yeah, we good. For now."

"Ouuu bitch, I'm so happy for you! Come in the room, I just ordered some pizza and the plug bout to drop off some shit."

Oh, sweet fucking relief "You fuckin' read my mind. I-"

Before I could even finish my statement, my phone had buzzed and Blu name had popped up. My nose wrinkled like I just passed a hot-doodoo ass bathroom when I pulled the banner downward to open his message.

Baby girl you bout to have me pull up while you at Jamie house so you can sit on this dick. I'm sure Jamie won't mind. Bear bout to bring that goof shit so she gon' be too high to even notice you out slobbing on a nigga dick.

That was one message.

Fuck it, imma be there at 1045 sharp. Make sure you got on a dress and no panties, baby girl.

I could feel my stomach drop to my toes and my pussy clench from the inside out. You just don't know how badly I wanted to screenshot all this shit and send it to Cut so he could be done with this nigga but I ain't even hear from Cut all day. That shit had me and my pussy in my feelings. And considering whern me and my daddy kicked it, he basically put me up on game and it made me think of the shit Diamond was shouting in the restaurant.

He going to trick your ass just like he did me and his other bitches, just you watch!

It made my stomach churn, and the more I started to line up the dots about the fact that my mama had shot his uncle who was a big shot in these streets, it made me feel all the more worrisome. I figured if all these stars were about to align and come crashing down on me, I might as well get mine before I get got. Money and dick included. And if I gotta take Blu big dick I want to be kissing Pluto too, shit.

I closed out the message, stuffed my phone back in my pocket and looked back at Jamie with a reassuring smile.

"Who was that?" she looked me in my face and raised her eyebrow. I guess my facial expression made it known that I was not fucking with something and that something was her boyfriend fucking uncle.

"Nobody girl. Your plug bringing white girl too?"

Jamie blinked twice and cocked her head at an angle like she didn't hear me correctly.

"Ana, you asking for what I think you asking?"

I shrugged my shoulders, smirked, and walked ahead of Jamie into the bedroom. "If I'm going to tell you all that I was told, I might as well smoke a lil bit and sniff a line while I'm at it."

Jamie's mouth was still slightly opened even as I passed by her. Considered we had already broken that barrier back at the hotel room, she ran her fingers through her hair and nervously chuckled.

"So, does this mean I can stop hiding the shit?"

"Girl, you grown," I assured her, "You can do whatever you want. And besides, if imma do it, imma do it with my best friend. Now," I took off my shirt and laid on my stomach with my right arm extended in front of me and the opposite used as my resting arm. I rotated my wrist around and around to watch the light shine off these fucking diamonds and I won't lie, the shit made me feel fucking adored. Like a princess. And I ain't even have to fuck for it. This came from the only man who truly got my heart.

My daddy.

"So, let me tell you what my daddy told me about Za."

--

Jamie and me talked till about 1030 that night. She ended up falling asleep after our last blunt and we didn't even touch the coke Bear had brought. Yeah, Bear was her plug. Well, wait, let me clear the air. Jamie Didn't do a line. When Blu pulled up in the blood-red charger with tinted windows I did 3 lines back-to-back to ease my mind and I even rubbed a little on my pussy to numb the shit.

I'm glad I did. I couldn't feel it when Blu had his face stuffed in my pussy and I didn't feel it when he had my knees to my ears drilling my shit or when he made me ride him till, I came his favorite number of times: 8.

I like what powder did to me. It made me feel sexy. It made me horny as fuck. It made my pussy wetter and it made me confident. By the time Blu tapped out I was dozing off with his dick still inside of me and he was making it seem like he was bout to take me back to the hotel.

I slipped him and the condom off me and politely declined. Afterall, I wouldn't have been sitting in my mama rehabilitation room right now if I agreed to it. it was early in the morning; my pussy was sore and I was downright aggravated that I had to even spend my morning in a rehab to see my mama.

Your mom been doing real good. she even getting some weight back on her. I want you to see her and speak your peace even if it's the last time you see her. you grown now and you can't carry that shit with you forever.

He was fucking right. but I knew in my heart that the feeling I had for my mama was nothing nice and if I was caught in the same room with her and she said the wrong thing to me, I would snap.

I just kept reminding myself to breathe, count to 5 if I had to and go to a happy place.

also, and don't call me no easy bitch for this, but I like how Blu fucks me. I like how he makes me feel good when he beating my shit up and although this shit was contractual, it just... Felt the fuck good.

Of course, that led me to make the Venn Diagram chart in my head and I noticed just how much more Blu was giving me attention than Cut and if we're really keeping tabs, I'm seeing Blu a lot more than I am Cut. Cut would just come by, drop off a present and some dick then be gone for me to look at Chyna for another week or whatever.

Was I saying all this shit now to distance myself emotionally from Cut? Maybe. But who fucking can think of that far ahead in the future? At least not me. Not right now.

My daddy and I was sitting in the visitor chairs in front of my mom as she sat in her bed and read the thank you card line for line. She looked up at us, dewy eyed, and smiled.

My head was down in my phone when she looked up. I was reading the first paragraph I drafted for the letter I wanted to write for my testimony and I don't know if it's because I'm nervous as all fuck but it all sounded like a jumbled mess and the more, I was reading it the more frustrated I was getting.

"This some bullshit." I mumbled under my breath. but apparently not low enough since my mama made eye contact with me.

"What's wrong, Ana baby?"

I looked square at my mom and took in her face. she had some goddess locs in her hair, her face was fuller and she even wore her nose ring again which made her look even younger.

Her eyes were brighter and her skin didn't look as dull as it did. but I still felt this twist in my arm when I was in the same room as my mom and I wasn't proud of the shit but it was there.

"Nothin' mama." I curtly replied.

"You sure?" her eyebrows scrunched together, her manicured hands cradling the card in her hand.

"Yeah."

"Baby girl you don't gotta bite your tongue, if it's something on your mind say it. Kandi not gonna trip, ain't that right, baby?"

Even after all these years and all the shit my mama put this family through, you can tell my daddy still had a soft spot for her even through all the hurt she did on him. even after lying about za. even after the tricking. even after blaming me for junior murder.

As I sat in my all-white oversized Balenciaga shirt, I crossed and uncrossed my legs uncomfortably. twisting the tennis bracelet back and forth. my daddy surprised me with the even more matching anklet to the mix so I was iced out from my wrist to my white-ass toes.

I could feel all eyes on me and I don't know why the first thing that came to my mind was-

"Why didn't you tell me Za was my blood brother and not my half-brother?"

My mama's eyes grew big and cut straight to my daddy whose eyes cut down to his fresh all-red Air Max 95's.

My daddy and I had the same mouth. once we got started that was it for whoever felt the fire.

"Ana, I- Honey, we can ta-"

"Naw, I'm bout over talking. you kept stuff from me for all these years. and I'll be 100% honest with you, ma, if it wasn't for daddy I would not be here. and you know why? in your sober mind, do you know?"

My mama looked down at her card that had my daddy signature and my initials. She couldn't really fix her mouth to say much to me and she knew she really couldn't. I played mama to my mama for god knows too long and for me to be back in the same room with her after she, in her out of body ass mind, accused me of not only stealing junior away from her and plotting his murder when she knew junior was a pie ass nigga.

"Ana-" my mom's voice cracked as she said my name. I could hear the pain in her voice but that side of me switched off a long time ago. it was hard for me to feel bad for someone who wanted to get as far away from me as possible by killing themselves so I can survive my way through the streets.

"And Skooby? you know he bout to get the chair off some shit that involves you? or have you checked out of there too?"

My mama always had this habit that when she was embarrassed or feeling shameful, she would smooth down her hair and kick her leg up and down. I'd be lying if I said she wasn't doin it now.

I opened my mouth to say more, but my daddy gently placed his hand on my knee to signal for me to stop.

"I know there's a lot of tension in the air-"

"ain't no tension, daddy. I just want her to know that the shit that I wanna say is being spared and the fact that because I loved you so much, ma. I stuck the fuck around. I stuck around when you overdosed, when you was fucking dudes my age in the house for dime and nickel bags and shit. I was clowned all at the west because them same niggas would come up to me trying to have me suck they dick to give you a complementary bag on the house. how you think your only daughter supposed to feel? then-"

I wiped the tears that was trying to come to the surface and continued.

"periods, I learned on my own. losing my virginity, I learned about on my own. boyfriends, I learned about on my own. and it wasn't like my mama was dead or no shit like that, you were right down the fucking hall. sleep from sneaking out onto the streets all through the night for grade-d coke and shit."

I shook my head, disgusted. I swallowed a lot and I knew that from what me and my daddy talked about, I had to cross all my p's and q's regardless of what happened. I was about to help the feds and that's never a good sign in any hood. but right now, I didn't give a fuck. this was my time to get closure.

"I don't hate you," I sniffed, "I don't hate you after all the times I felt like you hated me so bad that you let us live in a fucking squalor. I don't hate you for lying on them police reports saying my daddy raped me. I don't hate you for fucking all them young dudes. I don't hate you, ma. I can never do that, you my mama."

I stood to my feet, dusting myself off and wiping the corners of my eyes. my daddy looked up at me apologetically before returning the gaze to my mama who still had her head down, the get-well soon card soaked with droplets of her tears.

"After everything, I can never hate you. I can only know how not to be if I ever want to be a mom. but I'll say this and be done with it. you did a lot of selfish shit, and a lot of shit a woman who loves herself would never do," I was one to talk "but you know what, you taught me to be selfish right back. to get what I needed out of people right back. you taught me how to get it, I just wish it was the right way."

"I forgave you a long time ago because I'm sure if you knew better you would certainly try to not get this bad. imma always love you, ma. and if you really love me, ma, and I mean really love me, love yourself enough to stay clean and be selfish enough to get out the hood. until then, we don't have shit to talk about. when you good and out the shit you created, call me."

I made my way to the door, holding back tears as I pulled out my phone. I couldn't even look my dad in the face and he didn't really try to stop me. what could he say? we just started this daddy-daughter shit two days ago; he knew this was gonna come.

You could hear an ant sneeze by how quiet it was in the room, but as soon as I closed that door the voices began to rise and the crying started.

I continued walking and walking and walking. blindly I navigated myself around the rehab while avoiding the eye contact of the nurses on staff. when I spotted a bathroom, I made a beeline inside and locked it immediately behind me.

I crumpled down to the floor and sobbed. my knees pressed to my forehead to make me feel as small as possible. I hated that this shit was my reality and it hurt more seeing all those wires hooked up to my mama and as much as I hated sounding like an asshole, that was the only way I felt I knew how to get the fucking message across and I could just feel my heart ripping at the inseam.

I leaned my head against the door and just shut my eyes to think.

I need to make this right for me.

I'm gonna leave Cut, I'm gonna write Skooby letter, and I'm gonna get my money and go so I can start a new life and be in someone college.

I know I couldn't just tap dance my way out of it, but now I had to stop playing chess blindfolded.

I saw my pieces clearer now.

With a final moment of clarity, I pulled out my phone and opened the text thread between Blu and I.

Come get me. I'm at Rosemary Gardens Rehabilitation center. I'll do the thing you like on the ride back to Jamie house.

it didn't take no more than 15 seconds for him to respond with an OK emoji. he already had my location so I didn't need to share it.

I got up, looked at myself in the mirror and fixed my lashes and makeup.

if I'm gonna make my exit out this game, I'm gonna make sure don't none of the players see me make my move. even if it's a dirty move.

I applied my gloss. One coat. Two coats. A dab in the middle once more. I took a small vial out of my purse, dabbed some powder onto my fingers and rubbed them around my gums and tongue to numb my throat and walked out the bathroom to the front of the Rehab to wait for my ride.

Play the game, even if your pieces get a little blood on them.

Discussion Time a long chapter = a long discussion haha!

- how do we feel about this chapter? - do we feel like Ana is slowly using cocaine to cope with her emotions? - how we feeling about ana and her daddy relationship blooming? Do you think its too late for them to re-kindle their relationship? -Do we think Blu is going to overstep his "contract" with Ana for the sake of Cut? Do we think Cut is going to find out? - how do we think this newfound acceptance is going to mold the relationship between her and jamie? -How do we feel about the confrontation with ana and her mom? - do we think ana's mom is going to get clean after rehab? - how do we feel about ana picking Blu while Cut is away? - do we think this is going to change the dynamic between her, bear and jamie? - what do you think is going to happen in the upcoming chapters?

Let me know! Bye now!