#xiii. annie january : 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭.

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𝐒𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐍  𝐃𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐋𝐘  𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐒 — 𝐌𝐔𝐒𝐄  𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐒

bold  all  that  apply  to  your  muse.  italicize  sometimes  or  verse  dependent! muse :      annie  january / starlight.

LUST  :      desire  for  connection,  pursuit  of  pleasure,  emotional  intelligence,  obsessive,  lovesick,  one - night  stand,  seductive  encounter,  flirtatious  conversation,  erotic  party,  seductive  attire,  revealing  clothing,  passionate  gaze,  provocative  makeup,  sensual  expressions,  suggestive  gestures,  flirtatious  smiles,  lingerie,  love  letters,  perfumes,  provocative  behaviour,  love  poems,  erotic  art.

GLUTTONY  :      indulgence  in  experiences,  savoring  moments,  hospitality,  generosity,  hedonism,  culinary  expertise,  wine  tasting,  excessive  snacking,  overloaded  plates,  excessive  portions,  bloated  stomachs,  messy  eating,  greasy  fingers,  full  tables,  indulgent  spreads,  overflowing  cups,  satisfied  expressions,  wine  bottles,  can't  get  enough,  fast  food  wrappers.

ENVY  :      motivation,  competitive  spirit,  strategic  planning,  observational  skills,  bitter,  rivalry  contest,  envious  gossip,  resentment - filled  argument,  social  media  jealousy,  furrowed  brows,  clenched jaws,  side - eye  looks,  pursed  lips,  tense  posture,  whispering  behind  backs,  crossed  arms,  gossip  magazines,  keeping  up  with  the  joneses,  the  grass  is  always  greener,  feeling  inadequate.

GREED  :      resourcefulness,  entrepreneurial  spirit,  negotiation,  materialistic,  aggressive  investment,  lavish  spending  spree,  resource  hoarding,  get - rich - quick  scheme,  auction  bidding  war,  property  acquisition,  piles  of  money,  overflowing  wallets,  luxury  items,  locked  safes,  penny - pinching,  rare  collectibles,  selfishness,  unwillingness to share.

SLOTH  :      calmness,  stress  management,  nonchalance,  relaxation  techniques,  lethargic,  apathetic,  inactive,  lazy  weekend,  binge - watching  marathon,  neglected  chores,  skipped  workout,  long  nap,  lounging  on  the  couch,  missed  deadline,  unkempt  appearance,  messy  hair,  pajamas,  blankets,  slippers,  procrastination  station,  self - care  routines.

PRIDE  :      confidence,  self - assurance,  self - respect,  dignity,  public  speaking,  self - promotion,  arrogant,  conceited,  egotistical,  self - important,  vain,  boastful  speech,  puffed  chest,  raised  chin,  smug  smiles,  spotlight,  tooting  your  own  horn,  showing  off,  refusing  to  admit  mistakes,  feeling  entitled,  personal  branding,  leadership  development.

WRATH  :      assertiveness,  decisiveness,  strength,  intensity,  boundary  setting,  courage,  indignant,  heated  argument,  road  rage  incident,  physical  altercation,  angry  outburst,  clenched  fists,  glaring  eyes,  tense  muscles,  raised  voices,  reddened  faces,  aggressive  gestures,  stormy  demeanour,  intense  frowns,  destructive  actions,  broken  objects,  punching  bag,  out  for  blood,  fists,  simmering  anger.

𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐠𝐞𝐝  𝐛𝐲  𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐥𝐞𝐧  𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦  :     @innerwar. 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐠  :     @leagueofdccm  /  @astr0logies / @dollhidden / @h-a-unted / and you !

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@leagueofdccm

THE BOYS 4.01 "Department of Dirty Tricks"

"May you not rest, as long as I am living! You said I killed you — haunt me, then! The murdered do haunt their murderers. I believe — I know that ghosts have wandered on earth. Be with me always — take any form — drive me mad! Only do not leave me in this abyss, where I cannot find you! Oh, God! It is unutterable! I cannot live without my life! I cannot live without my soul! Emily Brontë, Wuthering Heights

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@leagueofdccm ; homelander : you shouldn’t have even been there! three hundred & ninety prompts ; always accepting.

     𝐚  𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭  𝐨𝐟  𝐡𝐞𝐫  𝐰𝐚𝐬  𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐥  𝐭𝐫𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠  𝐭𝐨  𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞  𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐞  𝐨𝐟  𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠,     everything  that  happened  at  herogasm  felt  like  it  was  haunting  her  and  she  still  couldn't  believe  that  hughie  had  been  so  complict  in  it  all.     how  many  times  had  she  said  that  hughie  was  harmless?     that  hughie  would  always  do  the  right  thing  and  wouldn't  let  butcher  drag  him  down  whatever  dark  path  that  man  was  hellbent  to  stay  on.     annie  still  couldn't  believe  that  he  was  taking  temp  v  like  it  was  fucking  asprin  and  she  still  couldn't  believe  that  he  would  be  so  calm  about  it  all.     she  had  only  gone  there  to  try  and  stop  them,  to  find  soldier  boy  like  she  had  been  told  to  do  and  try  to  make  sure  no  one  else  got  hurt.     but  it  had  taken  a  turn  for  the     𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐬𝐭     and  there  was  nothing  she  could've  done  to  stop  any  of  it.     all  she  could  do  now  was  keep  fighting,  exposing  vought's  lies  to  everyone  and  whilst  they  were  doing  their  best  to  discredit  her,  she  knew  that  they  couldn't  stop  her.     she  had  given  up  everything,  she  finally  felt  like  she  was  doing  the  right  thing  and  yet  she  still  felt  like  she  was  being  haunted  by  what  she  saw.     homelander  fighting  for  his  life  against  butcher  and  soldier  boy.     torn  between  her  want  to  do  the  right  thing  by  the  people  who  needed  and  wanting  to  help  the  man  she  loves.     she  had  told  mm  to  let  it  go  with  soldier  boy,  to  do  the  right  thing  by  the  injured  that  needed  his  help  and  yet  she  had  been     𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐳𝐞𝐧     in  her  own  choice.

     𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧  𝐧𝐨𝐰  𝐬𝐡𝐞  𝐟𝐞𝐥𝐭  𝐮𝐧𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞  𝐢𝐟  𝐬𝐡𝐞  𝐦𝐚𝐝𝐞  𝐭𝐡𝐞  𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭  𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐢𝐜𝐞,     she  didn't  know  if  homelander  had  even  been  aware  she  was  there,  he  had  been  so  focused  on  the  fight  that  he  probably  hadn't  noticed  her  until  she  sent  a  light  blast  to  knock  soldier  boy  back  for  a  moment,  giving  him  an  opening  before  running  after  mm.     she  had  exposed  herself  in  a  way  that  was  likely  to  come  back  and  bite  her  later,  but  she  would  deal  with  it  if  that  happened.     but  after  she  had  kept  exposing  vought's  lies  and  them  covering  up  soldier  boy's  return,  she  hadn't  even  returned  to  tower  or  had  a  chance  to  speak  to  him.     until  kimiko  had  asked  her  to  get  her  a  dose  of  compound  v  and  as  much  as  a  part  of  her  knew  how     𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐬     this  could  be,  she  was  going  to  do  right  by  her  friend.     annie  had  made  her  choice,  she  knew  she  was  doing  the  right  thing  by  leaving  the  seven  and  vought  behind,  but  why  did  she  feel  like  her  heart  was  breaking?     

     𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞  𝐬𝐡𝐞  𝐤𝐧𝐞𝐰  𝐬𝐡𝐞  𝐰𝐚𝐬  𝐠𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐠  𝐭𝐨  𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐞  𝐡𝐢𝐦.     he  would  take  her  going  against  vought  as  a  personal  attack.     they  had  always  been  fighting  on  opposite  sides  without  ever  really  acknowledging  it,  but  now  they  could  no  longer  deny  it.     she  couldn't  have  both,  freedom  from  vought  and  still  be  with  john.     it  just  wasn't  going  to  work  out  that  way  and  it  absolutely  made  her  feel  like  she  could  break  apart.     not  that  she  even  could  do  that  with  everything  going  on.     but  she  knew  when  she  got  a  chance,  she  would  fall  apart  and  would  have  to  just  pick  herself  up  again.     annie  didn't  know  if  she  would  get  another  chance  to  say  goodbye,  she  didn't  even  want  to  think  about  what     𝐦𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭     happen,  but  she  couldn't  just  walk  away  from  the  tower  without  knowing  that  he  was  okay.     she  had  the  perfect  excuse  of  collecting  the  last  of  things  to  anyone  else  who  wondered  why  she  was  here,  no  one  had  to  know  the  real  reason  she  had  risked  this  trip  and  she  just  hoped  that  this  wouldn't  be  a  big  mistake  that  she  would  come  to  regret.

     𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠  𝐡𝐢𝐦  𝐰𝐚𝐬  𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐲  𝐭𝐡𝐞  𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐞𝐬𝐭  𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭  𝐨𝐟  𝐚𝐥𝐥  𝐨𝐟  𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬,     but  in  all  her  searching  for  him,  it  had  just  made  the  anxiety  build.     not  just  because  she  had  stolen  compound  v  in  her  bag  and  she  finally  knew  how     𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐬     temp  v  was,  but  because  she  really  didn't  know  what  to  expect  when  she  saw  him  again.     was  he  mad?     probably.     had  they  hurt  him?     she  didn't  know,  even  if  she  had  seen  him  fly  off  and  get  away.     annie  didn't  even  know  if  he  was  going  to  let  her  just  walk  out  of  here,  he  was  always  unpredictable  and  she  imagined  with  everything  going  on,  he  was  probably  likely  to  be  even  more  so.     her  heart  was  racing  in  her  chest  when  she  finally  saw  him  and  it  was  whole  mix  of  emotions,  she  wasn't  even  sure  which  one  was  winning  out,  all  she  knew  that  she  just  felt  so  sad  because  this  never  going  to  work  for  them  if  they  were  fighting     𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐭     each  other.

     𝐢𝐭  𝐝𝐢𝐝𝐧'𝐭  𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞  𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠  𝐟𝐨𝐫  𝐭𝐡𝐞  𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧  𝐭𝐨  𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞  𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭  𝐭𝐡𝐞  𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬  𝐚𝐭  𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐨𝐠𝐚𝐬𝐦,     she  had  to  constantly  remind  herself  to  stay  calm,  to  not  let  this  escalate  into  a  fight  because  she  didn't  want  to  fight  with  him.     but  emotions  were  close  to  the  surface  for  her  and  she  felt  like  she  was  just  cracking,  pulled  in  several  directions  by  her  own  head  and  heart.     shaking  her  head  as  he  spoke,  hand  coming  up  to  tuck  blonde  strands  of  her  hair  behind  her  ear,     "     i  was  only  there  because  i  was  looking  for  soldier  boy!     like  you  told  me  to  do     .     .     .     i  didn't  know  things  were  going  to  end  up  like  that,     "     she  never  could've  predicted  any  of  this,  she  had  known  more  than  she  let  on  because  of  details  that  hughie  had  told  her.     but  as  much  as  she  had  known  that  they  needed  to  stop  homelander,  she  knew  she  would     𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫     be  okay  with  letting  him  die.     it  really  was  the  most  difficult  thing  for  her  to  try  and  comprehend.     takking  a  deep  breath,  trying  to  keep  her  emotions  in  check  because  she  knew  if  she  started  crying,  she  wouldn't  stop,     "     i  just     .     .     .     i  couldn't  let     .     .     .     i  didn't  know  what  to  do.     they  could've  killed  you  and  i  wasn't  going  to  let  that  happen,     "     she  didn't  even  know  if  she  had  actually  done  a  much  to  help  him,  but  she  couldn't  ignore  that  feeling  of  guilt  that  she  could  and  should  have  done  a  lot  more.     she  definitely  knew  she  wasn't  helping  him  at  all  by  exposing  his  lies  about  soldier  boy  and  she  wasn't  going  to  stop  doing  what  she  was  doing  either.

     𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠  𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫  𝐚𝐭  𝐡𝐢𝐦  𝐚𝐬  𝐡𝐞𝐫  𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭  𝐡𝐚𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐝  𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐝  𝐢𝐧  𝐡𝐞𝐫  𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐭,     reminding  herself over  and  over  to  not  cry,  to  not  let  anyone  see  a  crack  just  like  maeve  had  once  told  her.     if  she  broke  now,  she  wouldn't  be  able  to  walk  away  because  she  would  let  him  just  pull  her  right  back  in.     she  had  to  stay  strong,  stand  by  what  she  was  doing  and  walk  away,  even  if  it  felt  like  the  hardest  thing  to  do,     "     i'm  not  going  to  be  coming  back.     i'm  done  with  all  the  lies  and  the  bullshit.     i  can't  keep  doing  this,  being  in  the  seven  and  acting  like  this  is  right,     "     she  couldn't  help  but  wonder  for  a  moment  if  he  could  hear  the  way  her  heart  was  racing,  her  body  filled  with  adrenaline  like  she  was  almost  in  fight  or  flight  mode,  but  she  didn't  even  know  what  she  wanted  to  do,     "     i  just     .     .     .     needed  to  see  you.     to  say  goodbye,     "     a  part  of  her  wanted  to  tell  him  that  she  even  though  she  was  leaving,  that  she  was  no  longer  a  part  of  the  seven,  that  she  was  now  actively  fighting  against  him,  she  still  was  hopelessly     𝐢𝐧  𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞     with  him  and  that  was  something  she  couldn't  ignore  or  turn  off.     but  she  didn't  know  what  good  it  would  do  either  of  them  right  now.

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@leagueofdccm ; homelander : you're mine. my muse's reaction to your muse being possessive ; always accepting.

     𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐞  𝐡𝐞𝐫  𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭  𝐝𝐚𝐲  𝐨𝐧  𝐭𝐡𝐞  𝐬𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧,     homelander  had  proved  that  he  was  the  only  person  she  could  put  her  faith  and  trust  in.     he  had  been  someone  she  had  looked  up  to  since  she could  remember,  she  had  been  so  excited  to  have  the  chance  to  work  alongside  him  and  make  a  difference.     but  it  had  seemed  like  everything  was  going  to  come  crashing  down  around  her.     all  because  the  deep  had  made  some  assumption  and  she  thought  it  could  all  be  over  if  she  even  dared  to  fight  back.     all  starlight  had  ever  wanted  was  to  make  a     𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞     and  be  a  part  of  the  seven,  the  deep  had  totally  taken  advantage  of  that  knowledge  and  thought  it  get  him  whatever  wanted.     she  hated  to  think  what  might've  happened  if  homelander  hadn't  come  in  and  stopped  it,  stopped  the  deep  from  taking  advantage  of  her  and  then  he  said  it,  two  words  that  changed  everything     -     𝐤𝐢𝐥𝐥  𝐡𝐢𝐦.  

     𝐢𝐭  𝐡𝐚𝐝  𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐞𝐝  𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭  𝐬𝐡𝐞  𝐝𝐢𝐝𝐧'𝐭  𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐞  𝐟𝐨𝐫  𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠,     her  anger  over  the  whole  situation  and  wanting  to  ensure  that  the  deep  could  never  hurt  anyone  else  like  that  again,  homelander's  voice  in  her  ear  telling  her  exactly  what  she  should  do.     what  had  been  more  surprising  was  how  easy  it  had  been.     or  how  much  she  had  liked  listening  to  him  beg  for  his  life.     he  was  pathetic  and  she  didn't  feel  much  about  ending  his  life.     then  the  adrenaline  wore  off  and  the  shock  took  over,  a  panic  that  she  had  ruined  everything  by  letting  her  anger  take  over.     she  had  just     𝐤𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐝     one  of  the  seven.     how  would  they  ever  explain  this?     but  homelander  had  promised  her  that  he  would  take  care  of  it  and  he  would  take  care  of  her.     in  that  moment  she  didn't  know  what  to  believe,  but  he  hadn't  let  her  down,  he  really  had  taken  care  of  it  and  he  had  looked  out  for  her  when  no  one  else  ever  had.     starlight  felt  like  she  owed  him  so  much,  she  would  do  anything  to  show  him  that  and  she  knew  that  if  she  could  trust  anyone,  she  could  absolutely  trust  homelander.

     𝐭𝐡𝐞  𝐭𝐰𝐨  𝐨𝐟  𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦  𝐡𝐚𝐝  𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞  𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐲  𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡  𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐞𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞,     which  had  been  a  comfort  for  her  in  the  days  that  had  followed  after  the  deep's  death.     she  had  no  idea  how  he  had  managed  to  explain  it,  she  just  knew  that  she  followed  his  lead  and  with  that,  it  seemed  like  she  had  earned  his  respect,  which  it  seemed  like  he  didn't  offer  that  out  freely.     the  more  time  she  spent  with  him,  the  more  she  found  herself  thinking  about  him  whenever  he  wasn't  around  and  it  was  more  than  just  a  little     𝐜𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐡.     starlight  didn't  know  what  to  think,  she  thought  that  maybe  it  was  just  her,  caught  up  in  something  that  would  drive  her  completely  insane.     but  she  had  a  feeling  that  it  wasn't  just  her,  she  would  catch  him  watching  her  when  he  thought  she  wasn't  paying  attention,  he  seemed  to  want  to  be  close  to  her  whenever  they  were  together  and  she  would  do  anything  to  figure  out  if  he     𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝     her  just  as  much  as  she  wanted  him.

     𝐢𝐭  𝐝𝐢𝐝𝐧'𝐭  𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞  𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡  𝐭𝐨  𝐟𝐢𝐠𝐮��𝐞  𝐢𝐭  𝐨𝐮𝐭,     a  few  friendly  smiles  and  gentle  touches  to  whoever  she  was  speaking  to,  the  occasional  glance  to  just  ensure  that  he  was  watching.     which  he  was,  just  like  starlight  knew  he  would  be.     it  didn't  take  very  long  for  him  to  ask  to  borrow  her  for  a  moment,  all  said  that  perfect  smile  and  charm  that  he  was  so  good  at  using.     the  moment  they  were  alone,  away  from  everyone  else  and  no  one  could  see  them,  her  back  was  pressed  up  against  the  wall,  one  of  his  hands  at  her  throat,  dark  eyes  not  leaving  his  face  as  his  words  made  her  whole  body  feel     𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐞,     sending  tingles  down  her  spine.     teeth  catch  on  her  bottom  lip,  one  of  her  hands  going  to  the  one  around  her  throat,  eyes  not  leaving  as  his,     "     prove  it.     prove  that  i'm  yours,     "

[nghtmarish]

@leagueofdccm ; homelander : have i ever lied to you? can't find it, meme tag is here ; always accepting.

     𝐬𝐡𝐞  𝐰𝐚𝐬  𝐭𝐫𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠  𝐭𝐨  𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤  𝐨𝐟  𝐚  𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞,     even  if  it  was  just  one  tiny  white  lie  that  he  possibly  could've  told  her.     but  that  was  the  issue.     one  of  the  most  frustrating  things  about  homelander  is  that  he  was  brutally  honest.     he  didn't  have  to  lie,  half  the  time  people  didn't  believe  him  and  those  who  did  just  had  to  hope  that  he  didn't  follow  through  on  what  he  said.     starlight  wished  he  had  been  more  dishonest,  so  that  she  could  snap  back  at  him  and  feel  like  he  could  no  longer  try  to  claim  he  had  such     𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐡  𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐚𝐥𝐬     over  them  all.     but  that  was  what  made  him  so  difficult  to  stop.     he  was  always  seen  to  be  doing  the  right  thing,  or  all  his  wrong  doings  had  a  good  excuse  and  were  easily  covered  up.     if  homelander  had  lied  about  anything,  he  was  so  good  that  no  one  could  even  tell  her.     it  was  absolutely  infuriating  that  he  was  so  difficult  to  catch  out  and  starlight  wished  there  was  just  more  she  could  do  to  try  and  stop  him,  instead  of  having  to  play  nice  and  act  like  his  lover  for  the  cameras.

     𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐰𝐧  𝐞𝐲𝐞𝐬  𝐬𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐜𝐡  𝐡𝐢𝐬  𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐞  𝐟𝐨𝐫  𝐚  𝐦𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭,     trying  to  ignore  the  way  her  heart  was  racing  in  her  chest  as  she  resists  all  urge  to  step  back  from  him.     she  hated  that  she  knew  he  could  hear  her  heart  racing,  unsure  if  it  was  because  she  was     𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐟𝐮𝐥     of  what  he  might  do  or  for  some  other  reason  that  she  was  constantly  trying  to  ignore.     but  it  was  racing  in  her  chest  and  there  was  little  she  could  to  stop  it,     "     no,     "     starlight  admitted  softly,  hands  curling  into  fists  at  her  side  as  she  looked  at  him,  brown  eyes  staying  fixed  on  his  blue  ones.     she  hated  this,  she  hated  not  knowing  what  to  do,  she  hated  knowing  that  there  was  very  little  she  could  do  to  stop  him  alone,  she  hated  knowing  that  he  was  onto  her  attempts  to  stop  her.     she  would  never  be  able  to  get  it  out  of  her  head  what  he  did  to  alex  and  it  was  all  her     𝐟𝐚𝐮𝐥𝐭     because  she  had  gotten  him  involved  in  something  that  he  had  no  business  being  involved  in.     annie  knew  that  he  would  not  hesitate  to  do  that  to  hughie  or  to  her.

     𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐢𝐞  𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐬  𝐚  𝐦𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭  𝐭𝐨  𝐭𝐫𝐲  𝐭𝐨  𝐬𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞  𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟,     willing  her  heart  to  stop  racing  so  much  and  trying  to  get  herself  under  control.     she  could  not  and  would  not  let  him  see  her  rattled.     homelander  already  thought  he  was  so  powerful  and  he  knew  there  was  very  little  she  could  do  to  actually  stop  him,  it  wasn't  like  the  video  of  the  flight  37  crash  was  actually  going  to  hold  him  back  anymore  and  he  had  pretty  much  told  exactly  what  he  would  do  if  she  was  to  release  it.     she  was  running  out  of  hope  to  actually  find  a  way  to  stop  him  and  she  didn't  know  how  much  longer  she  could  actually  stay  around  him  without  completely  losing  herself,     "     not  that  i  know  of  anyway.     you're  terribly  honest  all  the  time,     "     and  that  was  also  one  of  the  most  terrifying  things  about  him.     starlight  believed  that  he  would  do  every  little  thing  that  he  threatened  to  do  and  that  is  what  chilled  her  right  to  her  core,     "     why  do  you  even  ask?     it's  not  like  i  could  even  lie  to  you  about  anything,  you  could  probably  tell  right  away,     "

[nghtmarish]

     𝐬𝐡𝐞  𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝𝐧'𝐭  𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐯𝐞  𝐡𝐨𝐰  𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐨𝐮𝐬  𝐚𝐧𝐝  𝐟𝐥𝐮𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐝  𝐬𝐡𝐞  𝐟𝐞𝐥𝐭  𝐚𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝  𝐡𝐢𝐦,     apart  from  the  odd  conversation,  they  hadn't  really  spoken  to  one  another  about  anything  and  he  always  seemed  so  above  everything  that  she  didn't  even  think  he  was  all  that  approachable.     which  he  wasn't  really.     but  this  was  really  unexpected  and  no  wonder  it  made  her  a  little  flustered,  like  she  was  unsure  of  how  exactly  to  react,     "     sorry     .     .     .     homelander,     "     she  said  with  a  small  smile,  she  knew  he  was  here  today  as  he  was  doing  the  vip  event  with  ezekiel  and  he  had  a  speech  to  make  as  well,  but  she  didn't  think  she  would  see  him.     a  part  of  her  was  still  a  little     𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐞𝐝     that  he  would  speak  at  an  event  like  this,  he  didn't  really  seem  like  the  religious  type  at  all.     but  then  again,  maybe  it  was  all  a  part  of  the  image  that  vought  were  trying  to  present  to  the  world.     this  whole  thing  had  been  incredibly  eye  opening  and  she  didn't  really  know  what  to  think  about  it  all  anymore.

     𝐬𝐡𝐞  𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝𝐧'𝐭  𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤  𝐚𝐭  𝐡𝐢𝐦  𝐚𝐬  𝐡𝐞  𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝  𝐚𝐥𝐥  𝐭𝐡𝐞  𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐬  𝐬𝐡𝐞  𝐡𝐚𝐝  𝐭𝐨  𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐧,     teeth  pulling  on  her  bottom  lip  as  her  hands  pulled  at  her  skirt  for  a  moment.     she  had  been  so  grateful  that  they  had  allowed  her  to  wear  her  old  uniform  for  the  believe  expo,  she  actually  felt  like  herself  again  and  she  didn't  feel  so  exposed.     but  she  had  tried  to  refuse  the  new  uniform,  she  had  been  left  with  no  choice  and  she  was  a  quick  learner,  as  much  as  she  thought  she  had  some  power,  she  really  had  none.     starlight  highly  doubted  it  was  the  same  for  him.     then  when  he  talked  about  the  something  else,  she  couldn't  look  at  him  because  it  felt  like  he     𝐤𝐧𝐞𝐰     about  what  happened  with  the  deep,  or  at  least  was  aware  that  something  happened.     her  heart  was  racing,  nails  digging  into  the  palms  of  her  hands  for  a  moment  and  she  shrugged  her  shoulders,     "     nothing,  that's  it,  i  guess,     "     starlight  really  didn't  want  to  talk  about  what  happened  her  first  day,  it  made  her  skin  crawl  enough  and  it  would  be  worse  to  think  people  were  somewhat  aware  of  what  had  happened.     not  that  it  would  surprise  her  if  the  deep  had  that  kind  of  reputation.

     𝐬𝐡𝐞  𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝  𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫  𝐡𝐞𝐫  𝐦𝐨𝐦  𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠  𝐡𝐞𝐫  𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞,     her  mom  was  the  last  person  she  really  wanted  to  be  dealing  with  right  now,  at  least  for  a  little  while  anyway.     this  whole  day  just  felt  really  reminiscient  of  her  pagaent  days,  feeling     𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐜𝐞𝐝     to  do  things  that  she  didn't  want  to  do  and  doing  it  with  a  smile  on  her  face  the  entire  time.     if  she  had  thought  being  on  the  seven  would  mean  her  whole  life  would've  felt  like  one  of  those  ridiculous  hero  pagaents,  she  never  would've  signed  up.     she  wanted  to  save  people  and  instead  she  felt  like  she  was  just  constantly  on  some  stage,  forced  to  smile,  sing  and  say  exactly  what  is  expected  of  her.     it's  infuriating.     yet  when  he  smiled  at  her  like  that,  she  felt  herself  actually     𝐬𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐞     back,  not  a  forced  one,  a  real  genuine  smile  that  reached  her  eyes.     a  part  of  her  already  knew  that  it  would  look  good  for  them  to  be  seen  together,  but  she  also  wouldn't  deny  that  she  was  curious  about  his  speech,  especially  if  he  was  not  going  to  say  what  stillwell  had  given  him.     who  knew  that  homelander  would  be  such  a  rebel?

     "     𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐡,  𝐢'𝐥𝐥  𝐰𝐚𝐥𝐤  𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡  𝐲𝐨𝐮,     "     starlight  smiled,  hoping  she  really  wasn't  as  blushing  as  much  as  she  felt  like  she  was,  especially  since  he  kept  calling  her  kitten  like  that.     god,  she  was  like  a  school  girl  with  a  crush,  it  was  ridiculous,  she  had  to  pull  herself  together.     just  because  she  had  to  lie  about  being  a  virgin  didn't  mean  she  had  to  act  like  it.     linking  her  arm  with  his,  she  looked  up  at  him,     "     do  you  do  that  a  lot?     not  say  whatever  stillwell  gave  you?     "     starlight  asked,  unsure  if  that  was  even  something  that  she  could  do,  since  the  last  time  she  had     𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐝     to  stand  up  for  herself  when  it  came  to  her  uniform,  she  basically  told  her  that  if  she  didn't  wear  it  then  she  wouldn't  be  in  the  seven.     she  didn't  even  want  to  think  what  they  might  do  if  she  started  telling  the  truth,  he  probably  could  get  away  with  it  being  the  leader  and  all  that,  but  she  was  probably  replaceable,     "     the  way  they  make  it  sound  to  me  is  that  we  pretty  much  got  no  choice  in  a  lot  of  things     .     .     .     just  glad  that  i  got  my  old  uniform  back  today,  i  don't  feel  so  naked  and  exposed,     "     

" Just Homelander..., " THE LEADER OF THE SEVEN REMINDS HER with a playful wink throwing it in her direction. " Sir is too formal; we're family here, Starlight. Teammates. " Ah, yes. THE IMAGE. VOUGHT IS ALWAYS about these illusions of theirs. Madelyn loved to remind him of said image. Sunshine & fucking rainbows and laughing babies. Fuck the sunshine and fuck those babies; he'd laser each and every one of them if he fucking could, shove that perfect image of himself right up Madelyn Stillwell's and Stan Edgar's ass. Never did it once used to bother Homelander.... PLAYING THE PERFECT hero who was filled with joy and love, maybe because part of him wished he'd had that. Joy and love, he means. But he means real joy, the kind of happiness he sees on these mud people's faces when they are surrounded by their loved ones. Family. It just seems.... real. The smiles on their faces come out naturally, while his smile is forced. And love, he sort of felt that ? In a way, he guesses with Madelyn ? But it never does seem like the type of love you'd see in the movies and say out loud ' I want that. ' -- NO.

Mister American understood where she was coming from; he recalls being a BRIGHT EYE YOUNGEST LIKE HER ONCE-- beaming with joy when he had first joined THE SEVEN-- GOD, what a time. Now it's getting old, and it's getting boring, and while he's attempting to do some actual saving, some actual changes... Vought wants him to sit back and be their little show pony. When he looks at Starlight, he just sees another show pony for them to show off, their SHINY NEW TOY. Their little holy virgin, young and blonde with perky tits. " Complaining ? " Homelander shrugs it off, waving It like he would have none of that. " Is it complaining when you're just being honest ? I mean... you've been here how long, and already they've changed your outfit, they had you lie to your fellow audience. Fake your saves, and what else ? " Tapping at his chin in thought, just listing away every single demand that VOUGHT had, how it's always Vought this, Vought that. But not once did they listen to what Starlight wanted.

HE KNEW.... KNEW THERE WAS SOMETHING MORE BENEATH all this disappointment as if he didn't know there was something going on, remembers it when it came to her very first meeting, she thought he didn't notice, but he SAW EVERYTHING... saw the threatening look in her face when sending deadly daggers towards The Deep's direction. The glow in her eyes was fierce; it even had The Deep cowering in his seat like the little fish bitch he was. Oh, sweet, pure, Starlight will surely bring some excitement to his life, and he sees that now. The older super sighed, peeking out the tent's flaps; he saw an older woman scanning the scene and could hear her through the crowd as she called out Starlight's name. Deep blue hues flickering back to the blonde woman before him, offering her one of his signature grins, tilting his head to the side, his hands behind his back as he nudges his head for the two to make a leave. " Would you like to walk with me ? I'm about ready to go do my speech; you'll love it, by the way. I'm-- " Should he ?

" ...I think I will go with a different approach than what Stillwell wanted. What's wrong with us being a little more... truthful, hm ? I mean... what would GOD think of us.... sinners. I'd love to have my fellow teammates' support while up there. What do you say, Starlight ? " He offers his arm out for the young superhero to take; he's being such a GENTLEMAN ! His charms and all displayed just for her, pearly whites showcasing. " C'mon, Kitten. Don't be shy; I won't bite you. " he's doing his own thing without Stillwell taking him by the hand, without Stan Edgar's approval. He's sure the sight of him and Starlight walking arm in arm together would make all the fans curious about the two blondes resembling Barbie and Ken. This was his life, and he was The Homelander, the only man in the sky, and he could do whatever the FUCK he wanted. If Madelyn Stillwell didn't give two shits about what he had to say, then it's time he starts finding his own path; of course, he'll keep the act going. The time will be right when the time is right. And along with this new path comes a new trophy.

[nghtmarish]

     𝐢𝐟  𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐞  𝐡𝐚𝐝  𝐭𝐨𝐥𝐝  𝐡𝐞𝐫  𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭  𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬  𝐰𝐚𝐬  𝐡𝐨𝐰  𝐡𝐞𝐫  𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞  𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝  𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧  𝐨𝐮𝐭,     reinventing  herself  and  running  away  from  everything  she  had  worked  so  hard  for,  having  to  get  a  normal  job  and  no  longer  using  her  powers  at  all.     she  would've  told  them  that  was  never  going  to  happen  because  she  wasn't  the  kind  of  who  ran  away.     except  she  did,  things  had  gotten  intense  and  this  was  the  safest  way  out.     the  last  thing  she  had  expected  was  to  be  running  away  with  homelander.     the  two  of  them     𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠     a  way  out  that  wasn't  going  to  draw  any  attention  to  them.     they  disappeared,  suits  gone,  homelander  and  starlight  didn't  exist  anymore.     they  were  just  annie  and  john  january,  newly  married  couple,  just  trying  to  get  by  like  everyone  else  around  them.     it  was  almost  like  some  bizarre  story  that  she  was  shocked  was  her  life  now,  but  she  had  no  one  else,  he  had  no  one  else,  they  only  had  each  other.

     𝐢𝐭  𝐰𝐚𝐬  𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞  𝐭𝐨  𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤  𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭  𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫  𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐬  𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐞  𝐧𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐥  𝐧𝐨𝐰,     she  had  gotten  herself  a  job  working  at  a  nursery,  trying  to  bring  in  some  income  because  the  money  that  they  had  brought  with  them  wasn't  going  to  last.     they  had  a  small  home,  nothing  fancy,  the  kind  of  home  that  been  described  as     𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐞𝐜𝐭     for  first  time  buyers  or  newly  weds.     annie  just  had  to  stay  focused  on  making  sure  they  both  adapted,  which  seemed  to  be  more  of  a  challenge  since  homelander  had  spent  so  long  at  vought.     a  normal  life  had  always  seemed  beneath  him  and  yet  it  was  the  only  way  for  them  to  completely  disappear  from  vought's  control.     it  was  real  test  of  her  patience  at  times,  but  she  was  going  to  make  this  work,  she  wasn't  going  back  there,  there  wasn't  anything  for  her  there  anymore.

     𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐨𝐝  𝐢𝐧  𝐭𝐡𝐞  𝐤𝐢𝐭𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐧  𝐚𝐬  𝐬𝐡𝐞  𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐬  𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟  𝐚  𝐜𝐮𝐩  𝐨𝐟  𝐜𝐨𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐞  𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧  𝐡𝐞  𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐬  𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐬,     brown  eyes  glancing  over  at  him  for  a  moment,  she  was  never  quite  sure  what  kind  of  mood  he  was  going  to  be  in  and  she  was  still  learning  how  to  figure  him  out  quickly.     annie  had  to     𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐬𝐭     the  urge  to  roll  her  eyes  at  the  petname,  or  flinch  away  when  he  kissed  on  top  of  the  head,  clearly  the  look  on  her  face  said  more  than  she  had,     "     yeah  but  do  you  see  anyone  else  around?     you  don't  have  to  keep  it  up  all  the  time,     "     or  maybe  it  was  just  easier  for  him,  to  think  of  it  like  keeping  up  a  character  in  one  of  the  vought  produced  films.     she  sighed  softly,  shaking  her  head  and  running  a  hand  through  her  hair,  which  was  now  cut  short  and  more  of  a  honey  blonde  than  a  her  usual  white  blonde.     they  both  had  done  their  part  to  completely  disappear,  to  become  different  versions  of  themselves,     "     but  you're  really  gonna  stick  with  kitten,  huh?     "

     𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠  𝐚  𝐬𝐢𝐩  𝐨𝐟  𝐡𝐞𝐫  𝐜𝐨𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐞  𝐛𝐞𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞  𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠  𝐭𝐨  𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐞  𝐡𝐢𝐦,     leaning  against  the  kitchen  counter  as  she  looked  at  him.     it  was  still  so  strange  to  see  him  with  the  dark  hair,  wearing  normal  clothes  like  he  was  any  other  human  on  the  planet  and  not  the  greatest  superhero  that  the  world  had  ever  seen,     "     i  was  just  about  to  make  some  breakfast  if  you  want  something,     "     annie  told  him,  she  knew  that  if  she  didn't  make  sure  he  ate,  he  probably  wouldn't  especially  since  she  doubted  that  he  had  ever  actually  cooked  a  meal  for  himself,     "     then  i  figured  we  would  give  driving  another  go.     it  would  be  easier  for  you  to  get  a  job  if  you  knew  how  to  drive,     "     that  hadn't  been  shocking  when  she  had  learnt  he  didn't  know  how  to  drive,  when  he  could  fly  anywhere  he  wanted,  driving  a  car  would  probably  seem  so  pointless.     but  they  couldn't  use  their  powers  at  all,  they  had  to  act     𝐩𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬     and  blend  in  with  everyone  else,     "     unless  there  was  something  else  you  wanted  to  do  today.     it's  your  choice,     "

STARTER FOR @nghtmarish // FROM HOMELANDER TO ANNIE

THIS WASN'T HIS HOME. THIS WASN'T THE LAND OF THE FREE; SEA TO SHINING SEA, FUCKING BULLSHIT. This wasn't his home; this wasn't American Soil that he stood on. A new beginning that made him feel dread for the first time. Homeland- John, he's John now, and no longer is he Homelander. That name had to disappear along with him. He isn't a supe--- well, he is, but for this new life, he can't be. He's no longer Homelander with Incredible powers that would set this whole fucking country BONKERS ! He's JOHN JANUARY, an ordinary, boring human looking for a nine-to-five job to support himself and his... wife.

Long digits run through now chestnut-colored locks. John does this so often, two of his fingers tugging gently on a single strand, rolling the piece of hair between his fingers. When he looks down at his hand, he expects to see the dye stain his fingertips, BUT NOTHING. And when he shifts baby blue hues to his own Reflection, his hair is still brunette, and no longer blonde. Who is this man ? John no longer recognizes the man staring back at him; seeing him like this is so strange. Dressed in casual wear, sporting brown hair.

" Hi—" THE ONCE-UPON-A-TIME SUPE CLEARS HIS THROAT, and a forced grin creeps its way across twin flesh. " Hi! I'm John January, and I saw that you were hiring, and I would like to-- NO.... " His fist curls, and he slams it down on top of the bathroom counter—not enough to break it, though, so at least he's trying not to destroy their furniture. He grips the counter's edge, his head bowed low and lets out an irritated sigh. " .... Come on, come fucking on. You got this tiger. You fucking got this. " Eyes locking with his Reflection. THAT'S ENOUGH FOR TODAY.

He walks out of the bathroom and makes his way down the hall to the stairs leading to the kitchen and living room. Scanning the area, he settles on what—or, more accurately, WHO—he was looking for. A grin appears. " Good morning, kitten. " Homelander's voice DRIPS with honey spoiled with poison. He plants a kiss on the top of her head. " What ? Oh, don't give me that look, honestly. I'm just keeping up with the whole husband-and-wife act we have going on. I don't want people questioning our fake marriage or THINKING I'm a horrible husband. "

[nghtmarish]

     𝐭𝐡𝐞  𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐯𝐞  𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐨  𝐰𝐚𝐬  𝐬𝐮𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐝  𝐭𝐨  𝐛𝐞  𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠  𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐲,     something  she  had  done  for  years  as  a  teenager,  something  she  was  used  to  and  maybe  she  would  feel  like  herself  again.     well  that  was  bullshit.     it  had  used  to  feel  like  home,  but  now,  she  felt  like  she  was  still  constantly  lying.     lying  to  herself,  lying  to  everyone  she  spoke  to  and  no  one  seemed  to  actually  be  hearing  her  when  she  spoke.     annie  had  thought  this  was  going  to  be  easy,  going  to  be  just  like  how  it  was  when  she  was  younger,  it  would  be  like  going     𝐡𝐨𝐦𝐞     and  it  would  keep  her  feet  on  the  ground.     but  instead  she  still  felt  like  she  was  free  falling,  drowning  in  all  the  lies  and  the  fake  stories.     she  had  thought  she  was  getting  everything  she  had  wanted,  but  her  dream  had  become  an  almost  living  nightmare  over  night  and  she  still  couldn't  speak  up  about  it  at  all.     she  just  had  to  smile,  wave  and  say  whatever  they  wanted  her  to  say.     it  was  infuriating  and  she  felt  like  she  was  breaking  apart  at  any  point.

     𝐭𝐡𝐞  𝐭𝐞𝐞𝐧  𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐭𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞  𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝'𝐯𝐞  𝐛𝐞𝐞𝐧  𝐭𝐡𝐞  𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐞𝐬𝐭  𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠  𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭  𝐭𝐨𝐝𝐚𝐲,     all  she  had  to  do  was  answer  their  questions  and  she  didn't  have  to  think  about  anything  else.     she  had  been  one  of  them,  she  had  been  curious  about  all  sorts  of  things  and  she  had  wished  someone  could've  been     𝐡𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐭     with  her  then.     but  it  was  clear  from  the  way  everyone  was  looking  at  her,  that  honesty  wasn't  going  to  work  here  and  as  much  as  she  hated  lying  to  the  teens,  she  didn't  feel  like  she  had  a  choice.     lying  about  her  virginity  and  sex  made  her  feel  dirtier  than  anything  else,  she  had  almost  forgotten  how  badly  they  looked  at  sex  and  it  wasn't  this  terrible  thing.     it  wasn't  just  that,  it  felt  all  felt  so     𝐰𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐠     and  she  was  trying  to  remember  if  it  had  always  been  like  this.     or  if  she  had  changed  so  much  from  being  the  good  little  christian  girl  that  she  was  when  she  was  a  teenager.

     𝐬𝐡𝐞  𝐡𝐚𝐝  𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐞𝐝  𝐚  𝐦𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭  𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭  𝐭𝐨  𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞,     almost  as  if  she  was  trying  to  remind  herself  why  she  was  doing  all  of  this  in  the  first  place  and  she  just  had  to  keep  breathing  through  it  all,  just  keep  smiling  and  it  would  be  all  over.     starlight  jumps  at  the  sound  of  homelander's  voice,  spinning  to  face  him,  eyes  wide  as  she  realises  that  she's  been  caught  out  by  the  one  person  who  was  still  somewhat  of  a  mystery  to  her.     she  shifts  under  his  gaze,  a  blush  coming  up  on  her  cheeks  as  she  looks  down,  shaking  her  head,     "     i     .     .     .     "     she  doesn't  even  try  to  say  she  wasn't  lying,  he  obviously  had  known  she  was  lying  in  the  first  place  and  adding  lies  on  top  of  it  wouldn't  make  her  feel  any  better  about  any  of  this.     was  she  in     𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐛𝐥𝐞     for  lying?     or  was  she  doing  the  right  thing  by  playing  into  the  image  that  vought  were  trying  to  push  for  her?     annie  didn't  exactly  feel  like  america's  sweetheart  right  now.

     𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠  𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤  𝐚𝐭  𝐡𝐢𝐦,     extremely  aware  that  she  was  probably  still  blushing  and  she  shrugs  her  shoulders,  unsure  of  just  how  honest  she  can  be  with  him.     he  was  the  homelander,  leader  of  the  seven,  she  was  just  the  new  girl  who  was  trying  to  find  out  her  place  in  all  of  this,     "     i'm  not  a  huge  fan  of  it,  no,     "     annie  admits,  but  she's  definitely  playing  it  safe  with  what  she  says  with  him  whilst  she  was  being  truthful.     hand  comes  up  to  rub  the  back  of  her  neck,  shifting  a  little  on  the  spot  as  she  tries  to  ignore  the  way  he  was  looking  at  her,  like  he  knew  some  big  secret  of  hers  but  she  didn't  know  what  it  was  exactly,     "     but  i  guess  that's  just  all  a  part  of  this.     they  pick  an  image  and  we  play  a  part,     "     she  couldn't  even  hide  the  disappointment  in  her  voice.     shaking  her  head  again,  forcing  a  smile  on  her  lips  as  she  looks  away  from  him  for  a  moment,     "     sorry,  sir,  i  shouldn't  be  complaining,     "

@nghtmarish ( starlight ) // LIKED FOR A STARTER : HOMELANDER

STILLWELL HAS FAILED HIM YET AGAIN, YET A-FUCKING-GAIN. Of course, wearing that baby of hers like an accessory was far more important. She loves playing single mommy, and it's getting quite old. Why should he give a fucking damn what she wanted from him ? When she obviously didn't care to hear what he had to say. SHE GAVE HIM A SHIT SPEECH, one that made him want to laser her in half, along with everyone else who thought he was nothing but a show pony with a pretty face. He's much more than that; he'll show her and everyone else.

That ringing sound devours the noises around him. He walks among the crowd with a forced smile; he doesn't know what he says to the few people following him around like lost puppies wanting attention from their owner. But whatever he says brings a FOOLISH SMILE to his fans' faces. As he makes his way through The Believe Expo, he hears a familiar voice shatter through the ringing in his ears. Stops walking, turning towards the tent to the right...

...and it feels like a movie, where the wind lightly blows the flap of the tent, and there he sees Starlight, sitting among those who ARE OH-SO desperately in need of answers to the SO-CALLED RIGHT PATH. Homelander can see and hear how the man beside her is giving her a warning look, he doesn't want her to be honest, wants her to lie to these young folks. Keep the purity alive, he assumes. And she lies through her teeth, but he can tell she's uncomfortable with it.

HOMELANDER WAITED OUTSIDE THE TENT UNTIL STARLIGHT was done with her little-- whatever it was. Once she seemed to be the last one left inside their tent, perhaps collecting her thoughts on what she had signed up for, he approached the young blonde with his hands behind his back. Homelander tuts at Starlight, shaking his head silently for a moment. " Naughty, naughty Starlight. Does God know you just lied to your audience ? " She's far from a virgin, sweet, pure Starlight. A shame, though... but that's another thought for another time. " You reek of sins. " But her scent is consuming, inviting, another thought for another time. " LET ME GUESS... Vought wants you to paint pretty pictures of innocence and have you play little Miss Virgin, who waits for marriage. Our very own America's sweetheart. How cute. But... I can sense that you don't like it very much. do you ? "